#(i watch a lot of youtube so i am really picky)

[simgaroop]

I think I am neurodivergent.

There is no official diganosis and at this stage in my life I probably won't look for one. But in recent years I've started to think I probably am one. I even thought about asking my therapist about this, just before she released me a couple years ago. But it just felt like I was making things up at the moment. Besides, it is pretty stupid for a mental health specialist to self-diagnose, so that's why I am not saying this with complete certainty.

Huh, this is one of those posts I should be writing in Spanish.

Anyway, why am I randomly posting this in my Sim blog? Well, because I am exhausted. I've spent the last two months carrying a huge figurative boulder on my shoulders and just pretending (or masking) non stop. If you met me in person, the most likely impression you would have of me is that I am a very calm, warm and sweet person, who has her shit together, is the voice of reason, a great listener, someone who is eager to come up with solutions to any problem. Someone who has control over her emotions, who likes "normal" everyday stuff. People look up to me and I am constantly been asked for support, both in my professional and personal life. I am so nice and adaptable, that I was able to practically live in a hospital for over 5 weeks, just leaving it to go to work.

However, deep inside I am a very anxious woman, who is triggered by thoughts of death, disease (of loved ones), doctors and hospitals. I need to have my time to be alone. I prefer (almost need) to sleep in a very dark room and listening to movie or videogame podcasts. I've always been into videogames and animated shows, and I tend to obsess about those topics. I used to write a lot of fanfiction and loved it, but have never told a soul because I am so embarrased by it. I prefer to be alone, I hate to make and answer phone calls and when I get a notification on Whatsapp I really need to take a moment to even read the message (and it is even worse if it's a voice message). I am socially awkward in situations that are not related to work. I used to stimm a lot when I was a child, and I still do it when I am stressed. I was a picky eater. I used to be the lonely child who preferred to be by herself and only made friends because my parents were worried. I do not watch series on Netflix, but I can browse Youtube for hours and watch Lets Plays and documentaries about shows. I've always wanted to share my nerd tendencies, but I can't, because I am a woman in her forties, and my family and social circle look down on that stuff. So I constantly pretend and only when I am alone at night I can browse and look at the stuff I like, which is honestly very innocent, but I feel like I have to hide it.

And these last weeks I have had to constantly hide myself in my "social" and "professional" self. And I am exhausted. I feel like my heart is heavy. And it is even affecting my work performance.

So I come to my nerdy spot on the Internet to vent. To the one place in which I can sort of be myself and hope like someone might read this and understand.

*Reads Post* Wow, this is why I mostly lurk. I sound like a 15 year old and my urge to pretend that everything is fine with me is screaming that I do not post this. 😥

[muirneach]

hello! i wanted to ask a question if it's not a bother

i've been following the four tennis grand slams for a few years as they're easily available to me on sports channel in asia, since last year i really got into tennis so now i want to know where to watch the atp and wta? tennis matches which happen all year? i am still new to the details.

(paid, unpaid, free links? sites ? i'd appreciate all or at least any resource)

sorry this ended up being a bother

hello!! there are many many places to watch it. like you, personally i only watch tennis on the cable sports channels on my tv which streams all 500 level and above events so i think its a good deal but that’s just because i happen to have access to my moms tv plan lol. if your tv doesn’t have all tournaments (at least 1000 level) then:

paid

tennis tv - atp only but probably the best source as there’s live streams of every match at every level and replay access of full matches also, which is great if you miss seeing it live. plus their archive stretches back to 1990 so you can watch old matches too. however its $135usd per year (you either buy 6 or 12 month subscription) which is a lot of money imo!

tennis channel - full live streams of atp and wta matches but idk about replays? anyways this is also a good resource and they have great interviews with players and lots of great analysis outside of matches. but again its $109usd per year.

most ppl go with one of these and there’s pros and cons to both. also either one or both (idr sorry lol) doesn’t give access to slams because slams are very picky about who gets the rights to them but since it seems like you have alternate access to those i don’t think it matters.

free

my buddy kesh wrote this post for pirating sports in general but including tennis

there is also this post which is olympics focused but i’m fairly sure it’s also relevant for normal tournaments also, though it isn’t tennis focused

and if you don’t want to commit to any of that, atp tour, wta tour, tennis tv, and individual tournaments all post match highlights on their youtube channels within a few hours of the match happening so you can still sort of get a glimpse of what happened although it’s not as good. hope this helps :)

[flowervolcano]

Everyone, I want to take full responsibility for this because I’ve been watching this series non-stop on all the streaming services, posting about it on YouTube, Instagram, Tumblr, Twitter where I have refused to shut up about it at all. Constantly having “ideas” for what could happen next. I’ve written “scripts” for these potential scenarios that “may never happen.” But I still didn’t give up.

However, if it ends up like Heroes: Reborn… goodness. I tried to enjoy that series… but something about it was just so lackluster in comparison to it’s predecessor. (It had potential but it didn’t quite reach it) even with Heroes own flaws it wasn’t half as bad as Reborn, main issue; I didn’t feel much connection to any of the new characters… there wasn’t much to work with, and it’s a risk starting anew when someone is familiar and set on an idea so I tried to push that aside to enjoy it… however there was much I couldn’t just let go even if I wanted to. There was much ambiguity on what happened to certain characters and lack thereof (Peter, Emma, even Sylar) that was not satisfying enough. I am not someone who needs to be spoon fed things, and can respect the reason behind some characters exits, but however it felt like they were trying to push something out there for Peter’s disappearance without ever revealing it. (And when you remember they didn’t even try to contact Milo for this series— its no wonder he doesn’t want to come back now) although bringing back original characters only to kill them… that really added insult to injury. And even I think it’s okay to kill characters, Nathan Petrelli was my favorite, so I am not beyond allowing my favorites to die, it’s HOW you execute that, as long as it was written well there ain’t much you can complain about.

I do my best not to be the most nit picky person who expects a lot out of a show. I know the original had flaws, I personally have the most complaints about season 3 (I find the first half to be the weakest one of the series. I am very generous to season 2 due to the writers strike, it had a somewhat intriguing storyline.) So as we all know, I am not expecting anything show-stopping, there even are things in Reborn I felt had a lot of potential, which is a lot of the issue. It always comes back to wasted potential.

Which is why I hope this next chance isn’t wasted like Reborn!

[askaniritual]

i am picky about the media commentary youtube videos i watch in general because i think a lot of the analysis that gets popular frankly kind of sucks lol but i am Especially skeptical of any of the fandom retrospective/fandom history videos because i feel like soooooo often they’re either not made for people who were actually there and thus are just boring recountings of like random tumblr posts and pages from the fan wiki or they’re made by people who were like. kind of fandom adjacent but weren’t in that fandom and thus are not really able to engage w the nuances. plus so much of it is just like remember this??? weren’t we all acting weird in 2012??? and it’s like well. yes. do you have anything else to say about it? respond quickly

[mabith]

I also love Sister Boniface Mysteries, series 3 was fantastic and I'm rewatching the entire show all over again and MFMM is one of my top shows as well! I actually haven't watched Father Brown, but I was considering it because I'm looking for more shows like Sister Boniface - what other detective/mystery shows would you recommend? :D

Father Brown was never amazing, but I think after Sister Boniface it just feels even worse, so I kind of wouldn't recommend it unless you have it on as background maybe (there are some fun side characters and Mark Williams is perfect in the role). In particular the moralizing is meh (Father Brown is all about letting the murderer go to the police themselves and repent and YAWN). The earlier seasons were better, I think, but now my mind is so taken up with Sister Boniface it's hard to remember.

The first seven or eight seasons of Murdoch Mysteries were quite fun (starts out in 1895). It features a lot of actual historical figures in random episodes, and the side characters are just so great. Good bit of humor, Murdoch is always inventing modern things decades ahead of schedule. There is also an annoying recurring pseudo villain and it seems to be a prerequisite that Murdoch is accused of murder most seasons.

There's a not-quite spin off related to it, Frankie Drake Mysteries, more in the vein of Miss Fisher and also set in Toronto but in the 1920s. Definitely nowhere near the same quality as Miss Fisher but some fun stuff especially in the first couple seasons.

Miss Fisher's Modern Murder Mysteries was fairly fun as well. The mysteries were incredibly easy to solve, but it was a neat set up and I enjoyed the main character a lot.

The Mrs. Bradley Mysteries was a short-lived late-1990s show set in the 1920s, which I really liked. Only five episodes, but quality. Plus it's Diana Rigg.

Poirot is the classic, of course, and always a comfort watch for me. I mention out of acknowledgement that I am older than a lot of Tumblr. Of the newer Marple series, the first three seasons with Geraldine McEwan were good but if you're very familiar with Christie's works the cannibalizing of other stories and turning them into Marple stories can be annoying. The actress who succeeded McEwan just wasn't right for Marple at all and I stopped watching it (Miss Marple is a curious and vaguely menacing heron, the second actress was a field hockey coach).

If you're up for something in Chinese (with English subtitles) and not picky about historical accuracy in clothing, vehicles, etc..., Detective L is stupid fun (it's on free on WeTV and also Youtube but I think the Youtube one will have areas where the sound is cut). 1930s Shanghai, eccentric brilliant detective (and devastatingly handsome if you're into that), slightly dopier sidekicks, lots of humor. I honestly can't remember how the actual mysteries hold up, but every three episodes is one mystery arc and after ignoring the opening, previously on, etc... they're quite short episodes. You want to only watch up to episode 21 because they were banking on a second season which they did not get so the last three episodes are a cliffhanger and related to a wider mystery and who needs that. I'm a little biased because the lead actor is one of my favorite Guys, but I loved it.

The 2001 Nero Wolfe series was fun (another 1920s-30s), but I've also read all the original books so I'm not sure how much that makes a difference. No idea how it would feel to someone going in without knowledge of the books.

Bletchley Circle was an interesting one, far more harrowing than any of these others, and as you may gather I'm mostly into Fun Times.

For modern-set mysteries I'm quite devoted to Jonathan Creek.

[astrongtomato]

Hello there!

I hadn't updated my intro post in a long time and it was pretty bare-bones, so I thought I'd make a new one!

My name is Scott! I'm 23 and from Canada, just some random nerd on the internet who decided to make a Tumblr blog xD. I'm very shy about this place but I'd love to make friends here!

I love video games! I play a lot of League of Legends (although I've taken a break due to how much toxicity is in the game lately ;-;) Some of my other favorite games include platformers like A Hat in Time, Sonic the Hedgehog, Castlevania, Shantae, and retro games in general. I also really like visual novels like Ace Attorney!

Vocaloid is one of the genres I listen to the most (especially Hatsune Miku, she's my favorite). I also like vaporwave, internetcore and video game/anime music! I love finding new remixes of my favorite songs, nightcore is one of my favorite types of remixes.

I love collecting games and figurines! Or well, what I can afford at least which isn’t a lot but I try my best >.<

I've been getting back into watching anime! For a while I just didn't really know what to watch, I can be kinda picky sometimes. I just finished Neon Genesis Evangelion for the first time and I'm about to finish Jojo's Bizzare Adventure: Stone Ocean.

Drawing and writing are things I'm trying to improve at! I'm really insecure about it so I haven't done much in a while, I'm really trying to motivate myself >_<.

I love computers in general! just learning how they work or fixing them is something I spend a lot of my free time researching.

I also tend to binge watch YouTube, like a lot xD. Especially gaming channels or memes! I really like watching videos for speedrunning like SummoningSalt, comedic game reviews like Flandrew or The Lonely Goomba

MEMES whether they're just images or animations on YouTube, I like am obsessed with memes. I've got a lot of them saved and definitely would share them if you want xD.

Feel free to DM me or send an ask! I'd love to make friends and you're always welcome to message ^-^. That being said please do not contact or interact with me if you: - are a minor, my blog is strictly SFW but it's still 18+

- are a fully NSFW or sexual focused blog. Blogs with partial SFW/NSFW can definitely interact, as long as you're aware I may not be comfortable talking about some of your interests.

- only are messaging me with the intent of getting something from me or seeking a relationship. I’m not interested and reserve the right to block if you make me uncomfortable. - are sending me things or have on your blog content that discriminates people in any way. I've seen enough of that and I'm not gonna put up with it

I hope you have a really nice day and take care!

[palepinkgoat]

WEEKLY TAG WEDNESDAY

Thank you to my loves @deedala @darlingian @mybrainismelted! @juliakayyy

About you name: Karen

age: between Noel and Layla

starsign: Leo sun Sagittarius moon

your first language: english

second language: Spanish in the weakest way possible. I wish I would have continued it past high school or had the guts to practice with others. When I was in Mexico and in Spain I could get by, but that's it. I can understand more than I can speak. I guess there's always time to work on it.

favourite lip product: burts bees lip balm

the best food dish you can make without a recipe: any kind of soup or stew. I made a great bean and kielbasa soup that everyone loves. I'm also making cakes from memory these days after making them so often.

If you drink tea, what kind?: earl grey, sometimes chamomile If you drink coffee, what roast do you usually get? The kind I buy is a medium roast but I love any hot coffee, any time of day. favourite thing to watch on youtube right now: I like to watch what my kids call "mom tube" which is stuff like decluttering, house stuff, cooking and food related, money saving stuff... favourite item of clothing right now: I bought four of the same sweater in different colors from Target and I love them all. I typically do things like that - buy the same thing. I like a "uniform" and in my older age I'm getting more and more picky about the way fabric feels.

fandom three movies you recommend: Lady Bird, American Movie, Rushmore

your favourite concert: I saw Patti Smith in like 2004 and she was mesmerizing.

have you ever unfollowed someone over a fandom opinion?: call me petty, but yes.

have you ever left a fandom because of the fans?: I abandoned the shameless fandom for a while because it felt too overwhelming for me - that was back in 2016 maybe?

the best tv show you watched last year: The Bear

do you have a fancasting you just can't let go of?: I have no idea what this means!

a ship you've abandoned: Willow/Tara on a scale of 1-10 how willing are you to share your ao3 history?: Uh, 8? do you have a fandom tattoo?(do you want one?): I have "sorry I'm late" with an orange heart and a black heart on my forearm. I want another gallavich/shameless tattoo I just have to think about it a while. what fandom do you wish was bigger?: Can there please be a Mary Poppins fandom. I could talk about that movie all day long.

has a finale ever ruined a show for you?: I don't think so!

have you...

swam in an ocean?: yes, begrudgingly. I am terrified of the ocean but I swam in it really shallowly as a teenager. ever been vegan/vegetarian?: yes, also as a teenager. In my 20s I rarely ate meat but when I did I felt like I could lift a car. I would break my pseudo-veg ways for beef only. Steak. A burger. Anything. I love beef. Sorry cows. gone skinny dipping?: yes in my 20s at a campground when I was kind of drunk. Not ideal. I am terrified of the water outside of swimming pools, especially dark water. I think I was trying to be sexy or something?

gone skiing?: yes a lot when I was in middle school

been to a convention?: not yet! Crowds get me overstimulated so not sure if that's in my future. Tagging @heymacy @michellemisfit @francesrose3 @gallawitchxx @rereadanon @skylerwinchester @thisdivorce @howlinchickhowl

[mctwinkdom]

This is so cute, thank you for creating the questions @ravenrage27, and for the tag @slugesh @twinkodium

What color are your eyes?

Brown.

Tell me about your pets. Or your dream pet.

I had two cats when I was a kid. No pets for now but I would love to adopt a cat once I'm stable enough in my life.

Share some interesting fact about yourself.

I played the piano for 8 years, from 7 to 15, then brutally stopped for personal reasons. Didn't touch a keyboard for years but I finally got back to it and I've been playing everyday lately. It really feels like healing my inner kid/teen.

Also I can solve a Rubik's cube :D (Lando I can teach you!!)

What was the first fandom you were a part of?

Ugh One Piece. I read my first fic on Skyblog.

Do you have any phobias?

I'm really not comfortable in deep waters, when I can't see what's below my feet...

Are you a picky eater? If so, what food can't you stand?

Oh my God, yes I am. And I join Lando in our common distate for fish. Also nori seaweed, I almost threw up the last time I tried, I couldn't swallow.

Do you eat the burger and fries at the same time? Or one after another?

The correct order is: one bite of burger, couple of fries, one burger bite, fries, etc. And you should always finish by the fries.

Winter or summer?

I'm miserable in both, to be honest, but let's say summer.

What fanfiction tropes are your favorite?

Rivals to lovers, Friends to lovers, pining, sexual tension, and a lot more.

Are you studying or working? What did you study, what is your job?

I'm studying Publishing and Literary creation.

What is the last country you visited?

Belgium! To visit a friend.

What country would you want to move to after retiring?

Italy or Spain. Somewhere warm.

Who was your first crush?

Kid named Cyprien in kindergarden 😅 don't even remember his face, just that he reminded me of Arrow in the Indestructibles.

How did you get into F1 fandom?

French YouTuber named Squeezie organized a "GP explorer" with 20 content creators competing in F4 cars. I liked watching that race so much I wanted to see real professionals racing. I fell for Charles Leclerc first and then Lando stole my heart.

-

I'm tagging @landoom @v3lnys @izzief1rambles

[inhumanliquid]

what's autism like for you

Uhhhh. Hold on let me reflect on all the concious years of life I remember rq.

-I spend most of the time I'm not standing, laying, or on a backed non-rockable seat I'm rocking back and forth because stimming

-I ended up with a meowing stim due to being round cats my whole life and sometimes I do it "at" (in the general direction of) some random ableist allistic because they're just fucking everywhere apparently

-I literally can't ignore the ticking of analog clocks and nobody fucking believes me when I tell them the clock is too loud (had a teacher tell another kid to stop stimming once because I was getting overstimulated by THE CLOCK and she thought (incorrectly) that it was actually his chair)

-When I was a little kid I apparently started just randomly chewing on my hand on a regular basis (I never realized I was doing it and I only know because people told me - I have yet to tell anyone that I had no fucking clue it was happening)

-Every time I go to my little cousin's birthday party I get so overwhelmed I start bawling in front of tens of strangers... despite this, I continue to go to his birthday parties

-Sometimes my neck or wrist will jerk randomly - apparently these are not tics but rather myoclonic seizures

-Sometimes being overstimulated triggers my stupid fucking migraines, which makes the overstimulation worse, which makes the migraines worse, whi-

-I (titty-having trans) have to wear a t-shirt or tank top under my binder for sensory reasons (it isn't even the thicker fabric at the front that causes issues, it's the back sticking to my skin)

-I can't eat a lot of foods, and with those I can, it's often only specific flavors and/or brands - my family thinks this is picky eating, but it's actually part of the Avoidant-Restrictive Food Intake Disorder (ARFID) that they don't know is a thing, much less a thing I have

-I can't wear clothes, particularly shirts, with those stupid fucking scratchy paper tags on them - I also can't wear long socks, most jeans, or clothes with lace (the latter being like 99% of "women's" clothes)

-The raptor arms + tiptoes combo is REAL

-99.9% of ASMR content makes me violent, so I avoid it - despite this, YouTube really wants me to watch the ASMR content that makes me violent

-If I am speaking to you verbally one day, do not expect that to be true the next, because it likely won't

[storm-and-starlight]

Top Nine No Skip Albums (as tagged by @heronfem), organized in favorite album order! I just straight up don't listen to music by album (and am also truly ridiculously picky about stuff) so this was. a lot harder than I was expecting! (this isn't so much "top nine no-skip albums" as "literally the only nine albums I can think of that I don't skip any songs on" lmao)

Tagging anyone else who'd like to do this, just tag me back so I can see!

How to Train Your Dragon OST by John Powell HTTYD my best beloved. I watched this movie when I was seven years old, got Test Drive stuck in my head and Forbidden Friendship stuck in my heart and haven't gotten either of them out since. I know it's not teeeeeeechnically an album, but I love it anyways and it holds an incredibly special place in my heart. Favorite song: Forbidden Friendship

Save Rock and Roll by Fall Out Boy The yearning... the yearning. Something about the nostalgia and the ache and the... the everything about this album sank into me. Alone Together is the song that got me to actually start listening to Fall Out Boy's entire discography, and we all know how that went. Favorite Song: Alone Together

Love Run by The Amazing Devil I just. I love this album so much, with all its motifs and melodies and intertwining songs. It's chaotic and beautiful and I will never get over how every single song but the last is about love going wrong in some way and yet the chorus of the very last song is love's worth running to. Favorite Song: Love Run (Reprise)

Vices & Virtues by Panic! at the Disco A collection of Absolute Bops and also The Yearning (Panic! version) and it's just. It's fun! The music clicks exactly with my brain in both a melodic and emotional sense, and that is extremely rare for an entire album to pull off. Favorite Song: This one's from the bonus songs that I think you can only find nowadays on Youtube, but it's Stall Me!

Masterharper of Pern by Tania Opland So this is a published CD of filk music based off the songs and poetry from the Dragonriders of Pern books, and. look. I like medieval-inspired folk. That's what this is. It's also about a book series that was extremely formative for my love of dragons, so just like. It's good. I like it. Favorite Song: Star Stone

Inside by Bo Burnham Every single song on this album is simultaneously an Absolute Banger and an Absolute Mood (which is everything Bo Burnham writes, really, but this one especially). That Funny Feeling is the best example of what it's like to be alive when it feels like the world is collapsing down around you that I've ever found. Favorite Song: That Funny Feeling

Ola Gjeilo by Ola Gjeilo Ola Gjeilo is probably my all-time favorite choral composer -- he does such fun things with harmony without being boring like some people (*cough* Whitacre *cough*) can be. Favorite Song: The Lake Isle

PTX, Vol. III by Pentatonix I went through a massive PTX phase in middle school (I was a preteen choir kid, what were you expecting), and this is one of the albums that stuck around. Favorite Song: Rather Be

Artificial Intelligence by Tom Cardy Every single song this man has ever produced is absolutely fucking flawless and I have nothing else to say. Favorite Song: Read Between the Lines

[dracimexidae]

I was tagged by @sirtadcooper - thank you!! 😃

Tag someone you want to know AND/OR some of your besties.

(mandatory under the cut because I'm an idiot who can't keep it short to save her life 😅)

Favourite colour: this is an easy one, I'm in an established relationship and still madly in love after so many years with practically every shade of violet/purple that exists! 💜 Maybe I'm slightly more drawn to colder hues, but I'm not really that picky when it comes to this family of colours!

(This is a picture of a portion of wall in my bedroom I have asked to be painted with this shade of violet - which is a bit darker in reality but y' know, artificial light, that corner is way too dark to photograph otherwise... the whole room has various hues of purple scattered around: curtains, decorations, blankets, pillows... here's a special appearance of my beautiful boat lamp! ⛵💕)

Last song: thanks to a suggestion from Youtube, which probably hates me, because I'm still recovering from a flu and generally weak so it would be wise to avoid any kind of unneccessary emotional outburst:

Not technically a song, but still... I'm not sure if I was crying while watching this because I haven't had the chance to listen to them live yet, since they made a European tour twice but never touched my country and I couldn't travel abroad to see them, or because of... whatever it is that is going on with this performance and these artists, "epicness" to me barely covers it, I know I'm exaggerating but that's how much I love Two Steps From Hell, what can I say... In any case here I am being even more of a mess than I already am, you'd think I have had enough of using handkerchiefs these days! 😭❤️‍🔥

Last movie: I think it was Imagine me & you, which I finally watched after seeing a lot about it here (unpopular opinion no one asked for, I thought I would have enjoyed it more... ☹️)... It was either that or Bros (which I actually enjoyed it more than I expected instead 😁), at the moment I don't remember exactly which came last...

Currently watching: Fellow Travelers as for new shows (fuck me, seriously, what am I doing to myself 😭 - I'm crying quite a bit in this post 😅), rewatching Blackadder after having finished A bit of Fry and Laurie 😆, and sports as well, mainly tennis, padel and basketball atm!

Other stuff I watched this year: Oh my, I didn't watch an awful lot of things, but I'll surely forget something - I'm terrible remembering this kind of stuff (if only it was just these things 😅)! Let's see, in no particular order, I can recall Minx (so far this year the most pleasant surprise in terms of TV series I've watched for the first time, silly [affectionate] little show), Wednesday (it was a bit meh for me, not sure if I'll watch next season), Red, white & royal blue (likely one of my favourite movies this year ❤️... yeah, it's not certainly a big deal of a movie ofc and I'm not even a rom com gal, especially for those Hallmark style movies, like this kinda is, but idk, it was cute and warm and brought good feelings and probably I watched it in the right moment for me, or one on which I just needed good vibes, what can I say), Call me by your name (even more than watching the movie reading the book was... quite an experience - I'm not saying it an entirely bad way, but I'm still so utterly confused about my feelings about this novel), What's love, The kissing booth (don't ask me about this one, the things I do to watch an actor I like 😅 - there's a whole trilogy of it but I only watched the two movies that had in the cast the actor I was interested in, really can't be bothered to do more than that, it was enough suffering I endured 🤣), Only murders in the building, The witcher, National treasure: edge of history (I don't care what anyone says, this show deserved at least another season, it was far from perfect but there has been way worse that still sticks around, and I'm speaking as a fan of the movies foremost, especially the first one, which is one of my comfort movies, as absurd and silly as it is 😊), Shadow and bone, The witcher (as for these, I'll probably keep watching an eventual next season only for some of the cast, because both were an utter disappointment and I wouldn't bother continuing otherwise), let's see, what else, oh yeah, Smiley (this was another nice show tbh, and in this case I could also train my ear a bit on the language since it's in Spanish and I'm trying to learn and improve it 😝) and two other Spanish shows (guilty again for watching mainly for an actor I wanted to see ah ehm), Merlì/Merlì: Sapere Aude and Alguien tiene que morir, and Érase una vez… pero ya no, all pretty much forgettable... I don't know what else, probably there is something more, but I'm making it lenghty already, I should stop anyway!

Shows I dropped this year/didn’t finish: damn, I should make a sheet about tv/movies as I do with books, it's honestly hard remembering what I watched or dropped! I can recall not going through the second episode of Warrior nun: again, another show I was curious about having seen things here on Tumblr, but I didn't feel it after the first episode, I'm not even sure exactly why - it's possible I'll try again someday, it's way too early to have an opinion after only one episode! I also didn't finish Lockwood & co., this one wasn't really for me tbh... I'm not even mentioning something I've been watching only and exclusively because it's a sort of joke I have with a friend of mine... All right, I'll say, it's High School Musical: The musical - the series 😅 Truth is, my friend likes the movies and low key also the series, whereas I hate them all, and she knows they piss me off and she has fun hearing my comments and teasing me about it... I have a bit less fun submitting myself to this "torture" but whatever! 🤣 I try to watch the series when I'm particularly willing to waste my time, because the only reason I'm doing it is to have a laugh with said friend, anyway rn I'm at the last season and it's so bad, sooooooo bad (mind you, meaning it's just not for me, I'm likely too old and too millennial to watch this kind of shows anymore), I don't know how I am supposed to endure any more of it lol!! I guess at some point I'll force myself to finish it to end my suffering and hoping my friend and I will finally close this questionable chapter of our watching experience, but damn it's hard! 😝 As for shows of which I completed a season but didn't watch the next, I could say one was Abbott Elementary: pretty bummed about it because it was actually cute and was enjoying it, I finished the first season when the second didn't air yet and when it did, I had moved on and lost interest a bit and wasn't in the mood to continue my watching (happens to me a lot)... I think at some point I will resume this one, just have to find the right inspiration! 😛 (I'm rather complicated and picky about my watching/reading experience in general, ops) And I have to mention as well, even if it will surely grant me some disapproval from the person who tagged me in this game 😆, I couldn't pick up Our flag means death after the first season as well, and for now I don't think I will resume it: I didn't really feel this show, I don't know what to say... 🤷 Should I mention that I also tried rewatching The Terror but I was like "oh hell no!" after the first episode?! 😅 In my defense I watched it at night, and the show is A LOT and nearly killed me the first time, yeah ok I'm making excuses but I have to be in a certain state of mind to watch certain things and The Terror is one of those cases - I already mentioned I'm complicated with my watching experience, yes?! 😜 Anyway it was a rewatch so it shouldn't count sssshhhh 🤫😁

Currently reading: more like, the books I've put on hold atm, ouch! True that this year, especially in the first half, I've read way more than I expected and definitely way more than I usually do, but that's not an excuse to make a pause - still, I'm realizing that it's been few weeks since I've picked up my readings! Anyway, what I've been reading is Mercanti avventurieri by Attilio Brilli, which collects stories about merchants and their travels and trades through the centuries; Columbus by Lawrence Bergreen, the account of Cristoforo Colombo's voyages in America - not happy enough of ending up horrified and outraged by the chronicle of Magellano's expedition (by the story and events, not the author's writing, which I actually appreciated a lot), I decided to educate myself more about another so called "pioneer" who thanks to his hubris committed terrible atrocities in the name of "progress" and "religion" and "civilization" and so on 😡 , since the little knowledge I have about Colombo comes mainly from my years at school... Despite the fact that my respect for this man is nowhere to be seen, I'm still somehow fascinated by the narration of sea voyages, which in the end are actually my main interest when reading this kind of stories; Atlante delle fortune di mare di Cyril Hofstein, an account of tales about (mis)fortunes at sea, involving incidents, lost treasures, mysterious events, discoveries, disappearances, disasters and so forth - btw, in the book there is this particular chapter:

The disappearance of the Erebus and Terror is the title - the real story is terrifying enough even without creating a fictional horror show inspired by it jfc!

And lastly, this is definitely the less "serious" reading, The Lawrence Browne affair by Cat Sebastian, one of my first attempts at reading "proper" (meaning they're not fanfictions, not that I don't consider those "proper" literature, on the contrary many of them are written far better than some published books I've read, so yeah, I should say "published" instead) erotic novels lmao 😝 This was a whim really, I felt I wanted to read something light, "wicked" and not to be taken seriously (it also was probably some sort of "knee-jerk reaction" to many of the queer books I read this year, which were sad, depressing and/or tragic 😔)! Romance novels are not really my jam in general, but every once in a while they don't hurt, since I'm doing it just for fun! This one is actually the second book of a trilogy, more disappointing than the first book I have to say, which was more "juicy" and entertaining! 😁

Currently listening to: ah, this is a tough one to pinpoint, because lately my Spotify is on shuffle most of the time (I have a folder literally called "Miscellanea" that keeps a bit of everything, it's a glorious mess lol), and my music preferences are rather varied... Let's say that if I have to consciously choose something at the moment, there would certainly be Poets of the Fall, Gaelic Storm, The Irish Rovers, Santiano (in general celtic folk/punk songs, especially if inspired by sea and sailors stories- those are good for all seasons 🥰), Two Steps From Hell, J2 and "epic music" in general, and dance-pop music from '70 to '00, original or remixes, especially when I work out in the last case!

Currently working on: do crosswords count? It's my newest pursuit lol 😆 Because otherwise I'm afraid I'm not working on anything in particular at the moment (and I should start, since I had a couple of ideas for gifts for Christmas that alas, have to be handcrafted in order to be created, and if I want to have them done I am the one who must work on them, ugh can you believe it, outrageous, what has the world come to 😂)... I occasionally do a bit of calligraphy, create costume jewellery or create little macramè things, again usually trinkets but this summer I bought thicker yarns so I could have a go at something a little bigger like coin purses, wallets and little bags, and all in all it didn't go that bad:

The problem is, at least with the purses, that with these dimensions I can't fit half the things I usually bring with me when I go out because "you never know what might happen I might need this thing", so these purses were more like first tries and will likely not be used by me very much because they are too small for my necessities! 😅 In any case, I had to put this activity on hold for a bit because I lacked some time to dedicate myself to it!

Oh, wait, does trying to repair a porcelain ornament that fell on the floor (not because of me, I want to clarify, for once that I don't accidentally bump into stuff and make a mess - which happens more often than I'd like 😅) count? Hardly but whatever, anyway it's going to be complicated to glue the pieces back, some have shattered in such tiny fragments, sigh...

Current obsession: I'm almost shocked to report that at the current moment no particular obsession has consumed my every waking hour 🤣 I mean, even the flame of padel, which I've been following almost religiously all year, has dimmed a little, but it is the end of the season/year, everyone is tired and so am I apparently, rooting for couples who almost never have significant results (story of my life lol), so I guess I'm recharging the batteries for another round of hopeless cheer next year, yay! 🥳 For the rest, in terms of media I believe there is nothing of significance to report in terms of proper "obsession" for the time being, so yeah, that's it 😌 (the times of Black Sails or even Agents of SHIELD are far behind me, I miss being that "obsessed" tbh ☹️)

Tagging @thelifeinmyshadesofgrey , @whitestnoise , @lives-ruined-and-bloodshed, @valentinaonthemoon , @mednay , @tirairgid (ofc if you want to and haven't done it before) and whoever wants to give it a go really!

[garfield-mug]

NINE PEOPLE I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW BETTER

thanks for the mention, liz! @sailor-aviator

LAST SONG? misery business - paramore (fucking banger)

FAVORITE COLOR? anything darker: black, plum purple, emerald green, forest green, navy blue, blood red

CURRENTLY WATCHING? while you were sleeping, the pjo series, the sopranos, wwdits, and lots of youtube

LAST MOVIE? the boy and the heron (i think?)

SWEET/SPICY/SAVOURY? yes to all. i love food (and cooking and baking) and am not a picky eater.

RELATIONSHIP STATUS? single and hoping to stay that way

CURRENT OBSESSIONS? uhhhhh honestly i haven't hyperfixated on anything at the moment, so i'll give you stuff i'm always obsessed with. 1. birds 2. snakes 3. animals of any kind really 4. GOOD cooking content 5. makeup recently? it's a new development

LAST THING YOU GOOGLED? while you were sleeping where to watch

no pressure tags: @roosterbruiser @roosterforme @lewmagoo @attapullman @notroosterbradshaw @seresinsweetie @seresinhangmanjake @bradshawsbitch @sometimesanalice

[cakemousse]

15 Questions 15 Mutuals

thanks for the tag @ladyofthenoodle!

1. Are you named after anyone?

not that i know of? i just know that there's symbolism in my name like most east asian names (im aware the rest of asia could be the same but i'm most familiar with the naming conventions of east asia so 🤷🏻‍♀️)

2. When was the last time you cried?

a few days ago??

3. Do you have kids?

no.

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot?

i don't 😉

5. What sports do you play/have played?

badminton was my life when i was younger, i was (still am as long as there’s people doing the activity with me) really sporty and i love doing sports and i find myself playing better with equipment than without, idk like i can play frisbee and captain's ball well but for some reason i can't coordinate my limbs with tchoukball? lmao

6. What’s the first thing you notice about someone?

i don't pay attention to people enough to know :p

7. What’s your eye color?

it looks black from far but it's actually dark brown, very very very dark brown

8. Scary movies or happy endings?

why not both? i’m not picky as long as it’s good 😂

9. Any special talents?

my special talent is being fine with being average

10. Where were you born?

somewhere in asia

11. What are your hobbies?

thinking about my blorbos 24/7 lmao and prolly watching youtube videos and shows i love, talking to people from around the world, writing, reading, gaming, learning about various things. i prolly would wanna get back into leathercraft as soon as i have the means too, and maybe discover more things as i earn more

12. Do you have pets?

used to have hamsters and a whole family tree of them but no, not anymore

13. How tall are you

168cm

14. Favorite subject in school?

science! i fucking love science especially chemistry and biology! i score in physics too but i hate doing it 😂 language classes are also fun hella fun for me

15. Dream job?

i don’t even want to work, i just want to enjoy life and have enough money for that, so a job that can finance that and is fulfilling to me would suffice lol working ain’t everything in life 💀

tagging @ladynoirist @literaphobe @p0mmia @little-mari-on-a-roof @bananagreste @miabrown007 @rosekasa @emsylcatac @2manyfandoms2count @talkstoself @frostedpuffs @asukiess @yeet-noir @amimons @eggrestes

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

Round-up of queer stand-up specials that were released in December 2023, and that I have watched (I did not set out to make this a specifically queer list, those just happened to be the three specials released this month that I was interested in seeing, and after I put them together in a list I realized, hey, December 2023 has been a pretty gay month for new British stand-up specials):

Leo Reich – Literally Who Cares (December 18, 2023)

I watched this because I am really trying not to be biased against Gen Z comedy. I think of how annoying it is when older people dismiss “Millennial” anything, and I don’t want to sound like one of those people when I say I think Gen Z comedy is all Tik-Tok stars doing prank videos for people with an attention span of eight seconds. So I have tried to watch their specials. The other one I tried this year was Finlay Christie’s OK Zoomer, which is free on YouTube and was better than I’d expected. There were good jokes in it. But also, throughout the hour (well… throughout the 37 minutes, because he wasn’t doing a lot to combat the idea that Gen Z people are performing for such short attention spans that they run well short of a full hour, but that’s just being picky because I think just about the best thing in the world right now is Sam Campbell and he did ten minutes in Edinburgh this year), I found myself working pretty hard to keep my mind open enough to enjoy it. I’d judge something and then stop myself and say, no, come on, this actually is kind of funny, if you’re not so judgemental (not with all of it thought – like I said, I think some of it is genuinely funny).

I’m pleased to say I did not have to do that with Leo Reich. Not even a little bit. There were a few parts that I didn’t love, but I let myself not love them without guilt, because I liked the vast majority of it so I knew I wasn’t just biased against him. Most of it I genuinely, easily, enjoyed.

And this probably should have been the type of humour that would annoy me. A Gen Z child talking about how very Gen Z he is, how the most stereotypical values of his generation are how we all live our lives now. That kind of things annoys me in general (it annoys me when Millennials do it too though, I don’t love any humour that’s too focused on generational stereotypes), and there were a few times when it annoyed me in Leo Reich’s show too. But only a few times, which is impressive given that that makes up so much of the show. I enjoyed most of it.

It makes me think of when I watched Maisie Adam’s show from the year she got married. So much of it was about her wedding, pointing out the sexism and just general stupidity of so many wedding traditions, and laughing at herself for how silly it is that she has to engage in them. And some of the humour got lost on me, because I kept thinking… well just don’t do it then. You’re right, obviously the father giving away his daughter is ridiculous. But you’re not the first point to point out the weirdness of this trend that we all have to follow. Most people have noticed that, and lots of them choose to not do it. You haven’t explained why you’re still doing it.

There were times when Leo Reich’s show made me think that, but about the performative social media obsessions of Gen Z rather than terrible wedding traditions. I appreciated it, when I heard him talk about how it warps people’s minds to live according to what will look best on Instagram. But I kept thinking… you haven’t justified why you’re doing it, though. This would work better if Instagram were something we absolutely had to do, and you’re pointing out the flaws in this system where we’re all unfortunately stuck. But you know we’re not, right? It’s like someone with their arm trapped under an easily liftable rock, doing funny observations about why the rock is so painful. It works best if you give some explanation for why you haven’t lifted the rock.

Obviously it isn’t that easy, obviously social media companies are spending billions of dollars to figure out exactly how to manipulate the chemicals in young developing brains (and older brains, but it’s even more common among young ones) to keep them addicted to it. I know that, and I see it in the teenagers I work with, and because of that, I do find it interesting to hear from the perspective of someone who is steeped in it. What’s it like in there? Why are you doing it? (I guess I shouldn’t condescendingly pretend to be so above it all because I have a Tumblr blog and am also imperfect for many reasons, I know.)

This is one of those extremely confessional stand-up shows, one of those “I’m laying out all my secret flaws and the most fucked up things I’ve done even though they might make me unlikeable, because I’m rebelling against the requirement to paint a sanitized public image of ourselves” shows. And there were a couple of points when I thought he might have succeeded slightly too well in his quest to make himself seem unlikeable. But only a couple.

This post has focused way too much on the negative for a show that I actually really liked. Let me be clear: I really liked this show. I’m being nitpicky about some parts that left me slightly cold, but overall, I thought it was great. It was smart and funny and it had well-shoehorned dramatic callbacks, I always like those. It had an interesting perspective and interesting points. It had ridiculously good production values for a show by someone so young, which makes me think we’ll be seeing a lot more of Leo Reich in the near future, if they invested that much money in filming him.

I didn’t have to force myself to enjoy this. It was good. It was about coming of age as a queer 23-year-old, and relationships, and the ways in which the panopticon of social media will fuck you up. Parts of it were sad. I’ve heard worse ideas than Leo Reich being the future of entertainment.

Jen Brister – The Optimist (December 14, 2023)

From the 23-year-old bisexual single boy, to the middle-aged married lesbian mother. Queer comedy is a spectrum.

I didn’t enjoy this one quite as much as her previous special, Meaningless, but Jen Brister is always good, and that includes this one. It was consistent, it felt polished in the way that you don’t tend to get until someone’s been doing this for a lot of years. Everything flowed and cohered.

It was a special about lockdown and about parenting, and about lockdown parenting. Lockdown and parenting are two of the subjects I’ve most often heard people say they’re sick of hearing about in stand-up, they’ve been done to death and everyone is bored of hearing any more. Jen Brister acknowledges this early on, saying she tries not to talk about her kids all the time on stage, because people are always saying they’re sick of hearing about her kids.

But then she proceeds to talk quite a bit about her kids anyway, which is fair enough. She has five-year-old twin boys – at that point, your kids are such a massive part of your everyday life that I can understand why parents have difficulty talking about anything else (in life or on stage). And while most (most, there are exceptions) parenting material isn’t really my thing, I’m glad it’s out there. Because there are a lot of people who dedicate most waking minutes of their life to focusing on being a parent, and it’s probably nice for them to go out afterward and hear comedy that reflects their experiences, that makes fun of the most frustrating and absurd parts of that life. It’s just not my life, so I’m not really in on the joke.

Jen Brister does a better job than a lot of comedians of including non-parents on the jokes, and they did make me laugh at times. My favourite parts of the show were when she veered away from the parenthood stories and into broader topics, but still, as far as parenthood-based comedy goes, I think she does it well.

The trademark anger is still there, and I still think that’s when Jen Brister is at her best. When she’s getting furious about important and unimportant topics equally. Her previous special, Meaningless, had some excellent, searing fury about feminist issues, and also a lot of lighter topics for frustration. This one doesn’t quite hit the searing highs of Meaningless, but it’s still got the anger, about, you know, all of it. Walking around looking at all the terrible people out there. What that’s like. She touches on that.

I’ve said before that I find it funny that NextUp’s “Angry Acts” collection only has seven acts in it, and two of them are Michael Legge. Worth noting that one of them is also Jen Brister. Her show Meaningless is on there as well as on Amazon Prime, it’s worth watching:

Mild spoiler alert, this is one of those comedy specials with a sad bit at the end. I found that bit worked well because I’m already pretty familiar with her comedy catalogue, where (less mild spoiler alert, seriously, stop reading if you plan to watch, this special is free on YouTube and it’s worth watching and if you do then it’s worth going in without knowing the ending) her mother featured quite heavily, so it was a bit of a gut punch to learn that her famous (famous from Jen Brister’s stand-up routines, not actually famous) mother had recently died.

If you don’t already know who she is, I think the sad ending bit might have not quite worked as well as it could have. It could have been built up to more, been given a bit more time to expand. The callbacks were nice, but a bit tacked on, they could have been built deeper into the show. But still, I found the ending interesting.

Susie McCabe – Femme Fatality (December 24, 2023)

I’ll say right now that this was my favourite of the three. I was so excited to finally get to see a full Susie McCabe special. I was introduced to her by Frankie Boyle’s New World Order, where she was a recurring guest, and she was always excellent. So I sought out her other work, and was disappointed to find that while she’s clearly got quite a successful stand-up career going within Glasgow, she hasn’t gotten big enough to have done a lot of stuff that I can easily see from Canada. Apparently she’s a regular compere at The Stand in Glasgow. One time she went on TV and said good things about trans women and then got called horrifying things by transphobes for a while, because it turns out that those people are not actually interested in being nice to lesbians.

Anyway, the point is that I was very pleased to see she has filmed a stand-up hour about exploring her relationship to womanhood, and I was not disappointed. The gender that she’s exploring is being a cis butch woman, which is, you know, my thing. I enjoy hearing people of all genders explore their relationship to gender, but I do connect especially well when it my gendered experience being discussed.

The show’s central topic is a fairly heavy one, which makes it all the more impressive that she keeps the show very light. It’s funny. It’s funny, and at no point does it get sad. It briefly gets serious, particularly at the end, and I guess if I wanted to be nitpicky about something, I could say that maybe she could also have drawn that ending out a little more, made her central points a little more clearly (I see the points she was going for, about the pressure to fit into masculine expectations and how that pressure is on cis men but it’s also on butch women who want to fit in with those cis men), could have explored that a bit. But this show wasn’t really about exploring the deep important points. It was about telling funny stories that come together on the central theme of what being a butch woman is like. And I loved listening to it.

There are other types of identity that come into this show – being Glaswegian and working class. But she never actually uses the words “working class”, she never gets deep into talking about serious stuff related to that either. Just funny stories about what life is like when you’re Glaswegian and butch and working class. It's fun and easy to enjoy. I almost wrote "fun and easy", but of course it wasn't easy to write. But it's easy to watch and laugh. It's warm and accessible (again, I feel like "accessible" is a backhanded compliment, I really don't mean it that way, I just mean you don't have to be a working class Glaswegian butch lesbian to enjoy it).

She gets into her history, her family, her co-workers, her deep, identity-level connection with butchness and lesbianism. The fucked up parts of female gendered expectations, particularly around being skinny and diet culture and intergenerational trauma that gets passed down through mothers indoctrinated with said culture. But she gets into it with such a light touch. She's so likeable and so much fun to watch. Quick to make fun of herself and hold no pretensions.

One of the shitty things about Frankie Boyle's New World Order getting cancelled is that he brought on several comedians I had not seen on any other TV shows - Jen Brister and Susie McCabe are actually both people I was introduced to by that show. Frankie Boyle was single-handedly keeping middle-aged lesbians on our TV screens, and now that he's out of the game, someone else needs to step up because I want to see Susie McCabe on more things.

[pixie-skull]

Ten Characters * Ten Fandoms * Ten Tags

Before I list the most impactful fandoms in my list, a huge shoutout and thank you too @confettipetticoats for tagging me. =D Please go watch her (Non)-Disney crossovers on Youtube as she both so talented and such an awesome pal of mine. :D So I am ranking from 10 to 0 as why not my list, so why not include zero. >:D I tried to choose fandoms I can say I am still a part of, yet not just like, but either been a fan for a long time or the given product means a lot to me.

10. Universal Studios Monsters: Now this a confusing entry as I am not someone who seen all the monster movies, but the impact and the handful of films I have seen from original to remakes, I am a huge fan of. I mean if it was not for my special interest in Mythology as is, this fandom adds to it. Does not hurt most of the bigger or well known monsters have roots in Victorian gothic literature. Favorite monster is hard, as all of them are fun their own way, but I guess my inner psychologist would choose Wolfman/Werewolf.

9. The Simpsons: Yes I agree it dragging on but still one of few shows that my full family and I bonded over, next to select shows that some family members all liked (Bones was very close to being on this list, but I never finished it). It along with other animated shows plus movies made me really want to consider voice acting for a future job. As well, I am not sure why Lisa not featured in the gif below. XD Favorite character though is Apu, plus in the video games, The Simpsons: Hit& Run and The Simpsons: Road Rage.

8. The Addams Family: I only watch the 90's movies and plan watch the original show and animated movies too, but from what I can tell of this fandom, very creepy, spooky, and kooky . XD Sorry too obvious to reference. Favorite characters are tied for the love birds (or bats would that be more in character) Morticia and Gomez. I try to avoid looking up to other people's relationships as everyone is so different, but I can deny these two are what I hope for in a relationship. If not that at least, I adore the just what the two stand for in a couple that is rarely depicted, friends and lovers, who do not settle and hate each other. Sorry but so many relationships especially parents seem to hate each other but stay nice for wanting a family. At a young age this trope I hated.

7. Avatar: The Last Airbender: Such a great show, from world building, character arches, animation, voice acting, and much more. I rarely find myself wishing if I could voice act in something, but this a show that and overall franchise I would be so happy to be a part of. Plus Aang such a well done character and often I do not relate to a character's personality as much I had with him. If from his trying to best to see in others but grows to be selective of who to open up to, being seen as both so young but an old Soul, awkward but willing to laugh at himself, and wants to hear a different point of view or at least learn more of life are few of other traits I can relate to in him. That being said I also can relate to Iroh for similar but in his own way, traits prior. He the supportive, fun, but heartfelt uncle I hope I can be. Yes I am tied between Aang and Iroh. XD

6. Owl House: Yes, a newer product on my list, but can anyone blame me? XD I am still so sad it was short as was, but hopefully come back. It had so much to offer, my newest comfort character is Eda and I am so picky of my comfort characters*, but dang this show you can tell had so much thought and carefully planned, and more. Eda the character I like most from the show too. Yes my biggest ship if Eda x Raine :P .

5. Hellboy: I need to read more these comics, as the movies ugh such a great twist of fantasy, a hero who really wants to do the right thing, but you do not blame him for feeling outcasted by those he protects, and more. Bonus introduced me to my current favorite director, Guillermo del Toro. As well one of my favorite hero quotes of all time. However favorite character goes, Red/H-e-l-lboy.

4. X-Men: I know the movies' timeline is all over the place, the X-Men Evolution Wolverine seems so hated (even though a guilty pleasure of mine), the first two are the best in the full series along a few standouts, but dang it this movie series was and still holds so much meaning to me. I mean the not so subtle message of being yourself and use what makes you different as a power felt even more powerful as when younger I was diagnosed with ASD in elementary school and only found by high school from being told, but prior I felt like a mutant, like I felt so pity (yes I had former friends who only became pals because pity), teased for things like special interests, and more, but these movies made me felt there was at least somewhat others like me. Lastly, for a kid, I respect the beliefs of the leader of the "good" and "bad" were so complex, as simple narratives on morality felt so demeaning as a kid. I mean as I get older (@little-bloodied-angel and I talked about this recently) I really consider Magneto one of the best 'villains' I have watched and read (I need read more comics in general). Bonus this franchise seems so awesome the earlier films had so many people who are in the LGBTQ Community: Anna Paquin (bi woman), Ian McKellen (gay man), Elliot Page (trans man), Alan Cumming (bi man). To be fair the Mutants being a metaphor for those wanting more civil rights or equal rights is well known. Favorite character goes, of late again Magento again just the appeal he more complex and even though violence if can be avoided please do that.

3. 90's Sailor Moon: I am aware such a case of nostalgia goggles on tightly, as I have heard the recent new version more closer to the manga. However the 90's one felt so more fleshed out and bonus the titular character herself one of FEW characters I have ever related to as a kid that was not just comedic relief or a side character. XD Yes I related the awkwardness of Thief from The Thief and the Cobbler, Flower from Bambi (if anything as a trans guy it feels so telling I wanted to liked a guy character who just happens to be comfortable being mistaken as a girl XD). Bonus one of my friends who sees me as found family, we bonded over adoring the 90's version. Favorite character the "protector of love and justice" herself.

2. Disney, mostly the villains fandom: I do adore the heroes/heroines, yet the campy nature of the former hand-drawn villains so great. As well, yes I am not sorry I have a shirt with this design below. >:D In regards which one is my favorite, Maleficent.

1. The Last Unicorn: The animated feature and the book (to be fair I have the graphic novel) both hold such introduction to Mythology for me and the writing (Peter S. Begeal I hope read more of his work) so similar to J.R.R.Tolkien in ways, that it also helped me love the fantasy genre too. Plus the sequel Two Hearts is not required reading but it does add more too. Favorite character is maybe a surprise Schmendrick. I just appreciate his confidence and overall character arch most of the main cast.

0. The Lord of the Rings: Besides the 2001-2003 live action movies, the extended cut too, the books, and the animated movies, this franchise I can not explain enough the impact it has had on me since as far I can remember. As well yes, The Hobbit book, films (including animated movie too) are worth their thanks too. Now in regards of The Rings of Power show on Amazon, I am unsure to watch, yet that is if The Hobbit is a C at best, I worry what that show is at best. Favorite character is so hard to say, but if I had to really choose Pippin (fun fact met the actor Billy Boyd at a comicon once) as he most audience surrogate I had related to growing up.

*= My other comfort characters: Eda and King

Thief:

Psyduck

Cubone

Flower:

I am curious of what: @little-bloodied-angel @impossiblepeggy @airasora @geebs96 @0chaotic-queer0 @thenamelessdoll @jujubee-edits @theevilsquirrelqueen @animagix101and @wardisahi would say are themes in my choices. Plus, your ten fandoms and ten characters you peeps like. Also was unsure mythology counted as a fandom, as if it does that definitely my biggest favorite fandom.

[cmns201assignment]

A Semi-coherent Rant About Commercialism in Media

I have a lot of thoughts and opinions on commercial interest in media, few of them are good. Initially, my mind jumps to social media which has become an endless onslaught of advertising and a massive perpetuator of ‘hustle culture’ where everyone is constantly looking for ways to make money. However, these ideas have also seeped into traditional media, placing monetary gain above creativity. A very cynical thought, I know.

Over the past few years, I have become increasingly aware of how commercial interests influence the content I consume, particularly when it comes to social media. Personally, I don’t often create my own posts or actively engage with others’ posts beyond a ‘like’. The majority of my social media use consists of watching YouTube videos or shorts, so I try to think critically about what or who I am watching, especially when there is any sort of advertising involved. For me this means being a bit picky over which creators I watch and always questioning things. If the content is expository, does this person have the credentials and/or sources to support the information? When it comes to content with sponsored, or even unsponsored, product recommendations I tend to look at the creator as a whole – what kind of content they produce, what efforts they make for transparency with their audience, the type of language used, and what do they stand to gain from these posts. Or I just try to avoid and ignore advertisements as much as humanly possible which is easier said than done.

That’s not to say that I don’t ever fall for the social media hype or think I’m better than people who do; if I’m being honest, if my financial situation were different, it’s likely I would give into it more often. One of the few perks of being a broke university student is that my wallet forces me to take the time to think about these things. Often in the time it takes for me to save up for things I want, I usually end up realizing I either don’t need it or never really wanted it in the first place.

Also, I think it’s worth noting that this awareness is extremely irritating. Sometimes I just want to mindlessly watch dumb videos or influencer drama, or to buy the thing just because I want to, but this questioning has become a habit so that rarely happens. My avoidance of ads has, in some cases, led to me reluctantly giving in to subscription services – whether or not it was worth it is still up for debate. My hatred of subscription services is a different rant for a different day, but my avoidance of those as well as certain tech companies (mostly Apple but again, different rant for a different day) has caused me to miss out on a lot of content that is exclusive to their platforms.

Media and commercial interest are so thoroughly intertwined that being a consumer can sometimes feel like dodging bullets and I think that overall, it has just made me very cynical. Between corporate influence, the rise of lifestyle influencers, and ‘hustle culture’, it feels like fewer and fewer people create just for the sake of creating. Of course, I understand that people need to make a living, I don’t take issue with that at all. I think what really bothers me is that commercial interest seems to have taken center stage and created this narrative that media should only be produced with the goal of monetary gain. As someone who paints as a hobby, I can’t count the number of times people have suggested I sell my work and are shocked or confused when I say I don’t want to. This attitude discourages people from creating just for fun, implying that if you can’t make money then you shouldn’t bother in the first place, which is an incredibly depressing mindset.

So, while my self-righteous attitude towards media and commercialism may be a bit dramatic and irritating both to myself and others, I do think it’s at least somewhat justified. For the sake of my sanity and my wallet, I’m going to continue as I have.