#(he doesnt know english don't say hi to my dad)

[fibi-draws]

not an ask but glad ur posting on tumblr! I remember ur youtube channel and missed seeing ur content, hope your doing well!

this is so sweet!!! i'm planning on getting back to at least making random drawings every once in a while but life keeps getting in the way besties i am so sorry ghfdjsk

[starry-bi-sky]

Snippets for my Clone^2 Au that I thought was funny...

in incorrect quotes style format (Clone^2 = Both my Clone Damian Au and Clone Bruce Danny aus combined)

Snippet 1: Danny and Damian meeting for the first time

Danny, avoiding Damian's katana: I don't wanna know who made you I don't wanna know who made you I don't wanna know who made you Danny: pleASE STOP TRYING TO STAB ME

------- Snippet 2: Danny and Damian meeting (Alternative)

Bby Damian: gets dropped off in the ONE city where his dad's clone is Danny, internally: damn I don't wanna know who made you

Danny: alright little buddy, lets -- *blocks Damian's sword* please don't stab me -- let's get you something to -- *blocks Damian's sword* please don't stab me -- something to EAT

------------- Snippet 3: Danny checking out books in the library Librarian: oh, are you trying to learn arabic, Mister Fenton?

Danny: oh- uh, yeah :) my parents recently,,, took in a foster kid from overseas,,,, but we found out he doesn't know english and he's having a hard time adjusting Danny, lying (only partially) through his teeth: so I,,, thought,,, maybe it would help him acclimate to his new environment if I learned some arabic :) Librarian: oh how sweet! let me know if you need any help, i can find you more books Danny: thank you

----------

Snippet 4: Damian wants to patrol Damian: let me come with you on patrol Danny, 16 year old idiot who fights without powers: uh. no. you are Itty Bitty Child Damian: comes with anyways

----------- Snippet 5: Damian, trying to fight a ghost without a ghost-proof sword: Danny, catching him and holding him against his chest: *radiating exhaustion* no,,,, no,,,,, not yet,,,,

-------- Snippet 6: danny has an epiphany Danny, realizing that he needs to set an example now that Damian is coming with him on patrol: fUCK Danny: I NEED AN ACTUAL SUIT ---------- Snippet 7; dynamic duo Danny: what is it with you and batman and robin???? Damian, silently sweating: ,,,,,,,because they are exemplary partners and i would like to think that us two are the same Danny, doesnt know identities: ...aww??? thats kinda sweet??? okay :)

---------- Snippet 8: hypocrite Damian: dijaal (affectionate) Danny, on day ?? of solving a cold case after a ghost asked him to: hrbhk - Damian, what are you doing up? it's late, you have school in the morning Damian, staring at him deadpan: you have school too. you should go to bed Danny: five min..utes buddy. then i'll go to bed Damian, grabbing the back of his rolling chair and pushing him to bed: no. now. danny, with eyebags the size of the marianna trench: ...fine. now.

--------- Snippet 9: ...the line Danny, doing homework with Sam and Tucker: Danny: *has an epiphany* wait. shit Tucker and Sam: ...? Danny, his head in his hands: am I Damian's dad or his brother?? Danny: wh- what do we define this??? Tucker: ... you're brothers until its funny? and then you're his dad?

----------- Snippet 10: learning Danny: reading a book about learning arabic Damian, slamming his hand down on the book to get his attention: dijaal, *points to book* kitab Danny, frowning: what? Damian, tapping book: kitab Danny: ..ki..kitab? Kitab? Book? Damian: Boog...book. *points to table* tawila --------- Snippet 11: clone reveal Damian, later after he knows enough english and months of chilling out: i am a clone.... meant to kill my original Danny, internally: wow you don't say? Danny, out loud:..huh. okay. thanks for telling me, uh, same here. except that last part

---

Dijaal = imposter Damian is affectionately calling Danny an imposter because danny is a clone of bruce :)

[arrowheadedbitch]

Okay, we were talking about multilingual Shawn in the discord server and I just wanted to share it with all y'all

So, we decided Shawn should be fluent in (I know it's an unrealistic amount, let us live) 13 languages so he can say he knows a baker's dozen languages

Which leads to everyone else going "what the fuck does that mean"

There are some languages the we know he knows in canon and some that are more unclear, and then of course the rest of the languages are just complete fanon

We mostly chose languages we failed to learn lol

So, here's the list we chose.

English, Hebrew, Thai, Hindi, German, Argentinian Spanish, French, ASL, Welsh, Russian, Italian, Polish.

When he tries to speak two languages that are even semi similar, he ends up speaking a weird conglomeration of both by accident

"he tries to hold a conversation and ends up switching languages everytime he doesnt know a word" -J

But these are the languages he can speak, and just the fluent ones at that!

I think he has a completely separate list of languages he can read and it mostly does not coincide with the ones he can speak lmao

"Someone calls him stupid a little *too* rudely and he is not in a great mood today so he starts cussing them out in all the languages he can to prove a point" -me

He absolutely forgets words in English and can only remember it in pretty much any other language

But he uses it to further his "dumb" persona, no moment wasted

When he forgets the word in English, he'll just say whatever word he thinks is probably closest and let's someone else correct him

Then he goes "I've heard it both ways"

" It was the- um *fuck, I can only think of the word in French, but they don't know I know french!* uh, jigsaw!"

"You mean *hacksaw,* Shawn?"

"...I've heard it both ways."

"NO YOU HAVENT"

A foreigner comes up to Shawn asking what the word for something in English is but he *also* forgot the English word for it so he's just sitting there staring at it like *Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh*

He probably learned pineapple individually in every language he could get his hands on 💀

He probably learned curse words first lmao

He can say curse words in languages he doesn't even speak

Like "I can speak 13 languages, but I can say hello in 8 more and I can say fuck in 29"

His greatest accomplishment (in his eyes) is the acquiring of so many swears

"My goal is to be able to call my dad a bitch in every language known to man the day he dies"

#LetShawnSayFuck

Also we had to look it up and he wouldn't be on an FBI watch list for knowing 13 languages, but if the FBI ever found out he would NEVER know peace again (not that he leads that peaceful a life) because they would NEVER stop trying to recruit that man

He would be on a list labeled "PLEASE recrute this man, someone FOR THE LOVE OF GOD hire this guy, PLEASE" so not quite a watchlist but close enough

Now, to tag the people who were part of the convo! @j-snapdragon @thespiritssaidso and majesticrhyhorn but idk if they have a tumblr

[kimi-co]

interesting aronelli recap and evaluation of the sources of media pressure, +an f2 driver popularity ranking based on ig follows lol

this is honestly the biggest 'problem' with paul imo. he didnt want to demonstrate that loyalty and he was not as docile as kimi but ykw leaving proved ultimately good for him (no more yapping abt them)

+ interview with gwen and toto on what they look for in the junior drivers. basically, they want kids who are fast, but more importantly, humble and loyal, who are willing to listen to them on anything. they want them with good parents who instill these values BUT also, just willing to listen to the team. like families that don't interfere with merc's decisions and preferably with less money/power/knowledge s.t. no decisions get made if merc didn't sponsor them. but merc invests a lot into their juniors and brands themselves as creating lifelong projects: they make sure to help them find success even if they move on to other series. now i'd say paul seems to lack some of the humility and maturity they're after, and he&his brother had way too many ideas—valid ones, but not what merc would have liked.

but i guess kimi is exactly what they’re talking about? his dad’s a touring car driver who later become team manager, but he never envisioned anything beyond f4 for kimi for financial reasons. so his son would mostly likely become a professional outside of single-seater like how george was offered a DTM seat before merc retained him by offering sponsorship and completely altered his career trajectory. for kimi merc decided to step in way earlier (maybe bc of verstappen) and cover all of his expenses when he was still in karting. his dad always told him to be critical of himself before blaming others, and there’s this whole ‘don’t ever complain when you just start working’ doctrine that got his teammate pretty concerned . he’s listened to merc the whole time so he’s been surprised twice in his 3 years of single-seater racing by the series he was told to join: the only like he had on twitter was the f3 calendar and he did a lot of iracing at the f3 tracks before he was asked to do freca instead. and then the jump to f2 this year. merc also picked prema instead of VAR (ollie’s f4 titles winning team + max’s old team) for him, or else him&ollie could’ve been teammates already in 2021

anyway back to the article:

like i totally feel this remember his quali interview at aus he was so nervous blinking and licking his lip like crazy (spun the next day too)

also reminds me of ^

but taking the time to train kimi into a pr robot is probably for his own good and im sure the 'no interviews unless enforced by the series for half a year' is all part of that

english is not my first language but punchy means that when people hear what toto said they sometimes really want to punch him in the nose right

nothing more to say here. i’m a ferrari hater 90% of the time, so i don’t really know what the italian press cooked up or what the whole deal with calling charles il predestinato just to crucify him later was—hence the fear of a repetition. but i do find the comment "there is no worse anti-Italian than a hateful Italian" from that original article about kimi getting announced at monza interesting. and i agree with the observation on the difference in the degree of destructive defeatism vs. unconditional support within the argentine vs. italian reception. like, some will support their drivers even if they’re bad because it’s about representation, while others seem to turn on their own when things don’t go as expected

unfair is the word i think for kimi all the hype and news coverage really don't benefit him when he doesnt need sponsors and he's only judged by his own team. compared to some other drivers who might need exposure, media, and f1 team attention. but press wants headlines and his age makes that easy. and then all the pressure comes.

kimi’s second on the list, but even ollie has to admit that kimi might be facing more pressure than he is

[my-castles-crumbling]

Hiiiiiiiiiiiiii Omg i havee SOOO much to tell and ask you its both sad and fun stuff, First off i wanna tell you that you are such an amazing person like seriously omggg how do u even exist like you must not be allowed away from heaven. Btw random: i heard u mention abt u in university so hows that going and whats ur majorr???? :)) And now the very very bad stuff: i messed up. not very uncommon you see, but very bad. my cousin whom i rllyyy love shes amazing shes like the andromeda to my sirius. nd my dad's side is very cruel to my mom before i ws born and they also shamed her for having a kid (my sis) that has problems (they refuse to tell me what it is but she has 2 problems idk the first one she has since birth and the second is that she had um.. men parts but when she was around 4/5 we founf out shes.. female? im a minor i rlly dont undersrand how ths works so..yeah. shes 8 now btw this year shes gonna be 9 y/o) basically very cruel people very very bad and so my cousin, whos from my dad's side, she came for like a sleepover thingy and my father commented on my mom's side and how they arent close to me even though they are my basucaly everything.. and in reply, i said how i like them and they are good and i said "my mums side is great... better than father side atlst" and she said "i can hear u yk" and i said that shes a excpetiion but when she wnt home she really felt upset and she had an exam but she stll didnt come to my house (my house is closer to her school so she stays here in exam time so it takes less tme in travelling) so my father cmpletly blamed me and now im so upset idek what to do i dont wanna apologize to her cz she doesnt know that i know that she said shes upset. my father confronted me about it and he got to jknow from my cousins mom so there was no direct contact but basically yeah thats it. i need help in what i should do to fix things again :( but this is the reason that simply talking wouldnt work and its rlly hard :( btw random: how do i start my microfic thing like do i just upoad a micfic or do i post smgthn else first if ykwim? another thing:

yeah idk but i think m bisexual and i have a bestfriend shes straight and supports lgbtq+ community but i rlly like her and cz were besties i dont wnanna ruin anything at all and im cool with how we r rn but at the same time i want more ykwim? and.. were like the touchy-feely kinda bestfriends so we hold hands n stuff as a joke nd people ship us and its so asdxdfgkhljhxx idek if i rlly like her as a frnd or i like her as in like like her.. but i also have a crush on a boy but it only lasts for 2 secs but when i see him again i start to thibk i like him again but my other rlly gud friend likes him so is it that i like hm and ignore my feelings js cs my frnd liks him or do i just like him as frnds,, idek were close we play games togheter n stuff but thtas about it..

also have i mentioned how much of an angel you are??? i literally scream and jump off a cliff casually when u reply to my texts <333 ilysm ur such a great person <333

xoxo, sweet potato <33

hi!

Aww you're so sweet! I'm not in university anymore, at least not in the traditional sense: I'm working on my master's degree. It's going.....not terrible lol. I'm majoring in ESL Education (English as a Second Language).

For your first question: I think this is a really good example of how talking through other people isn't the best solution. Do you have any way of getting in contact with your cousin directly? Because things are definitely going to be changed and exaggerated if you are talking through your aunt and dad. Once you talk to her, be truthful. Be sincere and tell her how important she is to you. I'm betting she'll come around.

For microfics: Nope, just go for it! You don't have to do anything beforehand, just start! I can't wait to see what you write!

For the last part: First, are you sure you friend is straight? If she definitely is, then yeah, it might not be worth it to say anything? But I mean, you could always try bringing it up casually. Like "Oh, I think you're really pretty!" and see what happens?

With the guy- I know it sounds cliche, but if your friend likes him, stay away. I've been there. I've seen friendships fall apart. It's not worth it, especially since you're not even sure of your feelings. I know I probably sound like a parent, here, but there was a full-on FEUD I experienced in eighth grade because two people were fighting over a guy and....yeah.

Thank you so much for the compliments, you're so nice!! <3 I hope you have a great day!

[nervousron]

Chronological Lazlow Jones quotes and facts from Vice City, up to GTAV

22 year old radio intern Lazlow covers his eyes and hides in the corner when ladies enter the recording booth without their shirts

“Im 100% rebel. I got kicked out of school after the 12th grade, man” (for non-american readers, this would be university)

“Dont sell out. I never will”

“I am the master of darkness - that’s why my name’s Lazlow”

“Remember, Im going to be famous one day.”

Lazlow’s V-Rock Radio job application was sent in hand written calligraphy with a bouquet of flowers

Lazlow was in high school band

“I flunked school cuz im parkour”

He is pro gun and conservative

“How is that fair? I mean Im white, middle-class, very erudite -um, yknow, whatever that means- but people just respond badly to me, i don't understand it”

“-and you keep saying ‘im from the streets’, Yknow what dude? Everyone has a street in front of their house, that doesn't make you cool”

“Its kinda been a dream of mine to sleep with housewives…”

“I love your strap, you’re a great guy!”

Lazlow was tricked into joining the military briefly

Lazlow’s mom sent him to inversion and conversion therapy

“This is the west coast. I’m only into lesbians, man”

Lazlow breaking into tears when a caller continuously encourages Lazlow to shave his bush so his dick looks bigger

“Hanging upside down to sleep doesnt make you cool, or alternative. I know because I tried it”

A guy called in saying he moved from Hampshire and Lazlow told him his english was good and asked if it was hard getting used to the language

As of gta III Lazlow is married. As of IV he is divorced, balding, and has a mustache. His wife left him for his best friend after he brought home a heavily drugged woman for a threeway.

He used to look at his best friends dick when he was sleeping.

(About the Brittish)“I think they were speaking English before we were. I mean, the people here were speaking Cherokee and Shoshone.”

Lazlow gets upset when a man implies spanking kids is okay. He gets even more upset when he realizes the man doesn’t have kids and just wants to be spanked

“My father was strangely silent my whole childhood, which y’know, explains a lot”

“So you would MILK your grandmother like some kind of TEAR COW?”

Lazlow pushed a hotdog salesman’s head into a pot of boiled hot dog water and tried to drown him. This was a very cathartic experience for him.

“You stick your hand down a stripper's panties, yknow, and you discover a pair of balls. Well guess what baby? The bitch is back. But im not a bitch, Im a man. Uhh-”

Lazlow was regularly caught kissing men backstage at concerts in the 80s

Lazlow mentions its easier to spike women’s drinks with GHB in Liberty City than Vice City

“Go play sudoku and die peeing on yourself”

“You’re not my type. I prefer unconscious chicks or milfs with stretch marks”

Lazlow has tried blogging, being in porn, vinewood, working glory holes, and taking "facefulls of pills" to be happy.

“dude. Can you really not rub your junk and talk about schools. Dude. dude.”

“And you just wish that ONCE you could share a bed with someone who wouldnt get creeped out by the pictures of my ex wife on the nightstand”

“You can catch an STD! From a Him/Her!”

Lazlow bites strangers when he’s mad

“Im a RAGING heterosexual”

“There’s nothing wrong with that. Y’know, I’ve worn some panties. Its not weird if a chick asks you to do it. Then its hot”

He begs strangers on the street to watch him windmill his dick online.

“This mustache once got me laid. Yeah, Yeah.”

“Isnt there one where theres a cup and two girls…”

He accosts Fred Armisen in the street. Fred is somehow much worse than Lazlow.

“DUR DUR DUR text message. EL OH EL”

“You’ll NEVER get to experience the 80s”

“For once, Lazlow is not getting bummed. I’M doing the bumming”

in Episodes From Liberty City, Lazlow’s mother and step-father pay for his radio show and he lives in their home. He hates his step-dad and new step-sisters

“Im the g-spot of radio”

“I’m here to stay. Like the national debt. or syphilis.”

Lazlow’s brother is a tv producer

Lazlow promised $2 to a man to follow him down the street with a saxophone to set atmosphere for his radio show

“I’ve really gotta spread my scent right now. And by that, I mean pee”

Lazlow’s step-dad is a mortician

Lazlow is pro choice, but only because he doesnt want to be a hypocrite

Lazlow’s sister was supposedly kidnapped. He claims he did not personally murder her.

“Nicaragua. Which is a company that sells nicotine… water”

“Do have a second for gay rights?” “Okay, a second. Sometimes five minutes if I’m drunk and nobody’s looking”

Lazlow makes his intern follow him with a camera and pretend to be paparazzi. It backfires.

Lazlow got hairplugs some time between IV and V

Lazlow invented podcasting

“It’s not molesting if they’re ugly. Trust me, i’ve been doing it for years”

“Molesting is when they’re human and cant complain, or dont like peanut butter on their junk. Those sheep wouldnt have complained if they COULD have. They were loving it!”

Lazlow’s intern tells everyone at the gay bar that Laz wants to get railed by three guys. Lazlow, not understanding spanish, is very excited by the attention.

Lazlow knows space facts off the top of his head

Lazlow Wants to cum in zero G

He has a grandma fetish

Lazlow talks about his experience of getting pissed on by groups of strange men

Lazlow is "Left wing", but only because he doesnt want to be fired

Through tears “I dont understand valleys or clouds, it sounds like a nursery rhyme”

Lazlow told the press Michael "molested (him) into cutting his hair"

Lazlow got roofied at his Sex Addicts Anonymous meeting

Through tears “Tony? Can we hug? Please? You shouted at me a lot… And Tony? I dont think you can say ‘Gay Tony’ anymore, it’s not PC, the internet will go crazy”

Lazlow spins records at kids birthdays

“He wants me to beatbox, i’m gonna fuckin get LAAIIDDD”

“One more scandal will ruin me. I’m WOKE now”

[scalproie]

Haha. Kazuya. You understand.

one aspect about them i love

THEM TIDDIES

but fr he has his whole aesthetic on point. and I will say. him face. nice

one aspect i wish more people understood about them

HE'S A TRAGIC CHARACTER. HE'S SOOO DOOMED IN ANY WAY BC CHARACTERS LIKE HIM ARE MEANT TO BE PUT DOWN IN A SATISFYING STORY. HE HAS WINGS AT HIS STRONGEST BC THE MOST DEFINING MOMENT OF HIS LIFE WAS FALLING OFF A CLIFF. HE'S ON TOP OF THE WORLD, THE HIGHEST HE'S EVER BEEN, BUT HE'S NEVER TRULY LEFT THE BOTTOM OF THAT CLIFF. HE'S ALONE UP THERE. HE'S A CONTROL FREAK WHOM YOU NEVER KNOW IF HE IS ACTUALLY FULLY IN CONTROL (IF AT ALL) IF YOU REALLY STOP TO THINK ABOUT IT. HE'S SOOO COMPLEX BUT WE'VE NEVER BEEN ALLOWED TO DWELVE INTO THAT COMPLEXITY. HE'S A REALLY INTERESTING CHARACTER AND I DIE INSIDE WHEN THEY KEEP PUSHING HIM INTO THE "PURE EVIL" BOX WHEN EVEN WHEN HE MADE THOSE CHOICES HE STILL IS NOT!!! I FEEL LIKE AN INSANE PERSON WHEN I SAY THERE IS SMTH SO EXTREMELY COMPELLING ABOUT KAZUYA MISHIMA.

one (or more) headcanon(s) i have about this character

- hes still alive in the tekken:tmp timeline since jun successfully "saved" him, and while the familial situation isnt the best it could be, its still far better than you'd expect with jun and jin

- he doesnt even consider himself fully human anymore but hes truly at his core Just A Guy. take the morning coffee. collect shoes. eat boring food. hes a very plain guy and its hilarious. what does he even do all day, the role of a ceo is to make connections and relationships and hes a shadow ceo. he is so painfully A Man In His Fifties that if you remove the tekken context he could grill a mean steak I know this in my heart, what do japanese dads even do for a bbq equivalent.

- kazumi styled his hair Like That back in the day and so he will wear that hairstyle for life

one character i love seeing them interact with

Apparently in bruce's t6 ending, hes speaking to his superior(?) about a mission well done but it's said he's reporting directly to kazuya, so even if who hes talking to is speaking in english I have to wonder if it was meant to be kaz at one point. Anyway if it is I love the casualness of this interaction.

Also jin! people say theyre tired of the mishima focus but NOT ME bc those dudes only interacted ONCE until t8 finally drops. Anyway their hostility toward each other is sooo obviously fabricated bc if the writers REALLY wanted to get into it, this father&son relationship would be so much more complex than that. Also in the first project x zone, devil kazuya is a boss fight and at one point devil and kazuya are fighting for control and for one (1) second, jin sounds concerned for his dad in the way that he wont be able to kill him while kazuya is himself. fun stuff. Their more neutral interactions as a tag team in pxz2 are a lot of fun too, especially when they team up to tear verbally into heihachi. Anyway like everything about kaz, his relationship with his son isnt explored enough.

one character i wish they would interact with/interact with more

Harada For The Love Of God Don't Fuck Up Kazuya's Interactions With Jun In Tekken 8.

I want to see fucking flashbacks man, how did it fucking happen. They had to have exchanged AT LEAST a couple words before getting to jin's conception and I WANNA KNOW. ITS THE MOST MYSTERIOUS AND INTERESTING RELATIONSHIP IN TEKKEN.

one (or more) headcanon(s) i have that involve them and one other character

I feel like. if you stripped kazuya and jun of status and general opposite moral stances, theyre very very similar. I will wait for official t8 confirmation oh what they thought of the other but I feel they are two side of a same coin. People usually speak of jun making kazuya better but I like the other side of kazuya making jun a bit worse. In a very indulgent way I often wonder what it wouldve been like if they tried at all to make it work long term and I dont think it wouldve been that bad, especially compared to how the previous main mishima relationship ended up.

[knbposting]

btw i love your headcanons for kagami's parents but if you don't mind me sharing my own hc - i always pictured the kagamis as a close, tight-knit family (of two because in my world kagami's mother died when he was about one) BUT i also think mr kagami is a workaholic who, despite loving his son very much, still has nannies and personal assistants looking after his kid because he's been On The Grind since his wife's untimely passing and The Grind keeps him from falling into true depression😩

It's also very funny for me to picture 9yo Kagami in his dad's office and having his dad's beleaguered junior assistant look after him for the day fhjshdjd But not as funny as his father banishing him to Japanese language school when he notices how atrocious Kagami's Japanese is because the poor boy speaks English at school and on the streets and his nannies are hispanic; I think one of the first times Kagami ran from home was in protest of the language school!

Again I hope you don't mind me sharing🙇🏻‍♀️ I'm just so desperate for the golden days of knb and my bestie is resisting my attempts to bully her into watching the show😔

tell your bestie i will kill every frog i see ON SIGHT if she doesnt watch knb with you again. IT'S ON SIGHT KERMIT

anyway that's so cute please!!!! please feel free to share any and all knb hcs with me i EAT THEM UP!!!!

i love how similar our hcs are for kagadad and then how they differ. the image of kagami lying on his tummy on the floor of dad's office with one of those finger skateboards, every so often telling his dad he's going to land this kick flip, and then having dad say "ok wear a helmet" even though he knows it's just tiny? that's dead cute ok. i love it

is the language school thing canon or your hc? i loooove it. also do not get me going but if kagami had a brain for language (which he doesn't at all but that's ok same i've done extensive in-depth language study across like 4 languages and i STILL only fucking speak english), imagine him also speaking a lil spanish... imagine an au where kagz is a linguistic god and a sudden polyglot outta nowhere

my dad hc is that his dad doesss love kagami, but less so for himself and more because That's His Son, you know? like he doesn't keep tabs on hobbies, he only cares about his grades so he can get into college (kagami gags in the bg), and then he wants grandkids (sort of so he can retry being a father because he doesn't feel like he's been his best with kagami) so he's always talking about GIRLS but kagami in my hcs is gay and has known this forever and is normal about it, but his dad is not :( alas :( but kagz makes up all sorts of excuses for his dad because they don't actually fight so much as just never see eye to eye :/ so i really love the idea that kagz sr is more involved with him i love it SMMMM

i make up for putting old red in the wringer by having aomine's family life be extremely solid and stable and he's really close with his parents. in my fics his mum is basically him, and i havent introduced his dad yet but i love him too :')

[pyro-tf2-but-trans]

heya, got any general tf2 merc headcanons? :D

OMG MY FIRST ASK

Scout- (most of these I've probably stolen from other hc accounts but with my twist on them) I personally believe he CAN in fact read, but has dyslexia and literally cannot read properly at least on the first try. especially out loud. I also believe he makes awesome cheesecake. don't ask why.

Soldier- I think he has minor hearing problems. He's got to! He's using rocket launchers to blast himself into the air! that would also explain why he yells all the time. I also fully believe that he's the guy who yells at 6:30 in the morning to wake everybody up. Even if it's a ceasefire, and even if there is absolutely no reason to be up that early. nobody can ignore him either, if they do he just gets louder.

Pyro- Pyro def uses any/all pronouns. I've seen a lot of people use they/them for them but that's unoriginal and my version of pyro deserves a little spice :). They also use ASL to talk to people, and he was able to get Engie, Demo, Heavy, Medic, and Soldier (He heard the word "American" and demanded to learn) (Spy already knows ASL, so there was no reason to tell him to learn lmao)

Engie- He sneezes like a dad and makes the best pecan pie on the planet. Shame he never leaves his workshop long enough to make it.

Demo- HE IS NOT AS MUCH OF AN ALCOHOLIC AS PEOPLE SAY HE IS. Too many people dissolve him down to "funny alcoholic guy" and I'm TIRED. But he also crochets with heavy sometimes

Heavy- Heavy knits while Demo crochets. it's a fun little hobby they do together and trade little trinkets they make. I imagine they also like to chat and tell stories of their families or their childhood in general. Also he def makes the best food

Medic- Medic probably has the most broken English on the team bc he didn't even think about learning it until like just before he had to move to New Mexico to be a mercenary. Also, he's kinda like ice king in the way all his birds are called Archimedes just all pronounced different like how all ice kings penguins are named Gunther.

Sniper- He's a lot more friendly than people tend to talk about him. Sure he isn't around much, but he's more like the introverted friend than just some weird skinny guy who showed up and doesnt like anybody. I mean yeah he can be like that but the people he unfortunately has to work with have helped him out a little

Spy- gets NO bitches no but like actually. He pulled one(1) girl, and that was Scouts mom. He just acts like he gets more because hes somehow convinced the entire team that he can. But also I imagine he gets nightmares a lot. comes with the job.

[miutonium]

Omg guys I really need to talk briefly about the PPG Movie. I actually never watched it as a kid because this movie didn't get release in my country and I actually didn't know they even have a movie until recently last year. I remember when I was a kid they kinda promoted the movie on CN by showing clips of the girls being interviewed seperately on a red couch and lmao my 6 yro brain thought it was cool and I didn't understand a thing at the same time because girly doesnt understand English so I actually didn't know it was for their movie.

Anyway, holy fuck this movie is everything to me because who would've thought a cute series about 3 little girls with superpowers has the saddest backstory ever???? I'm not going to talk about the plot in details, I rarher you guys watch it and understand the grief and pain I went through.

I honestly bawled my fucking eyes out after it ends because bITTCHHHH HOW DARE THE WHOLE TOWN TREATS MY LITTLE GIRLS LIKE THAT?????? 😭😭😭😭

I like how they build the girl's character here, when they were uh...born, all three of them look like a doll, you can't really tell their personality early on until the Professor assigned them their names. And I find it funny that Buttercup won't be as grumpy and tough as she is in the show if Utonium gives more thought into naming her lol. Also i won't shut the fuck up ever about this but I just love how Utonium just made them because he wants kids, he wants to be a parent and just raise them to be good kids. And him being new to the parenting thing (like legit he just thought of wow I want to be a dad because this town fuckin sucks and hours later procured a triplets in his lab) and he being very extremely freshly new to the parenting thing was like "oh shit it's their birthday I should get gifts!" When it clicked on him that it was their birthday and just ran out of the house to get them a car load of gifts while talking to gimself about how excited he is to be a dad (and also reminding himself not to leave the kids home alone anymore so after the incident he only leaves the kids with babysitters at home if he needs to go out at night)

It's so heartbreaking to see the whole town turning their backs on these innocent girls. They totally didn't know how the world works, they're literally 1 day old and poor Professor totally didn't know how to take care of them. They don't understand why people hate them and flew out and cry on meteors trying to process why everyone hates them. Idk seeing all three of them up there had me fuckin bawling like a dumb baby I am. I think I saw people say the Professor is bad at this time too because he didn't believe them and abandoned them and like honestly, no???? I don't accept Utonium slander in this house. He didn't hate them at all, it was just too much for him to handle in one day and he looks more like he is disappointed than he hates them and wants to get rid of them. If you ever notice, at the near end of the movie he ran back to the town with Antidote X and frantically looked for the girls to tell them he has ways to defeat Mojo. He didn't give up on them at all, he immediately ran home and quickly whipped out the Antidote from his lab and drove back downtown just to save the city instead of leaving it in chaos despite how much the people terrorised him and painted him as a villain. He still loves his native town very much and even though he is human, he wanted to give a helping hand to stop the rampaging monkey from destroying the city more. I wont shut the fuck up about Utonium in this movie ever ughhh 😩😩😩💕💕

I don't hate this movie at all despite the ill treatment on them in the middle of the movie. I really appreciate how their backstory has more meaning and also I don't blame on Townsville at all, I would be freaked out by them too. They have rampaging crimes and monsters visiting them by weekly. That's already a threat to them and then suddenly 3 little girls are rampaging the city while playing tag and this time they know who made them and you can arrest that person? I would be knocking on Utonium's door with picket fence and sporks and screams angrily at him too lol.

Anyway, 10/10 will terrorize my moots to watch this and made them cry too 🤧

[lxvebun]

Hey bun! I really like how you write everything so soft it makes me so happy. I stopped reading fics of my comfort characters for a while cause most people write them so mean and aggresive and that kinda triggers me but your fics make me really happy. Could i maybe request a dabi hcs with a super soft and shy so? Like they really like stuffed animals and sweets cute things etc. Thank you!

Dabi x soft!so

Hi honey, Thank you for requesting! This is a really cute idea. Honestly same! Its the reason I made this blog since I cant stand anything very dark and mean so im happy you like my work! This is pretty short but I hope you enjoy this as well.

English is not my first language so im sorry for any mistakes<33

Read my DNI before interacting

He thinks you're adorable

Complete heart eyes everytime he looks at you

Dabi doesn't mind that you're shy

He gets it if you don't t want to talk to people

Or if you dont want to go out much and rather stay at home

I mean Dabi doesn't even want to talk to other people and go out much

So really it's perfect

Dates consist out of movie/game nights with your favorite food and lots of cuddles.

Who doesnt want that!

He doesn't mind being your human shield

Will glady pull you into him and wrap his jacket around you and close you off from everything.

Will definitely tease you about your shyness

But all in a lighthearted way

"What to shy to even look me in the eye doll? ;)"

"Stop omg"

When Dabi finds out you like stuffies

Mans is always getting you a new one

Honestly you barely have any space for them now

But he don't care

Cause they do make you happy and he will keep getting new ones as long as that is true

;3

"....Did you do something?

"Look what I got you doll!

*shoves stuffie in your hands* :D

":') thank you baby but we barely have enough space for them"

"Then just..make more space

"Or you can stop getting them for me and also save yourself from getting in trouble

"Yeah..no I think the first option is way easier >:3

Better buy some new storage places.

You know how dads buy their kids food they mentioned they liked once?

That's dabi

"Hmm I really like this pudding"

You mumbled under your breath

He hears it

Fast forward next morning

Fridge is absolutely stuffed with them

"Since when do you even do groceries?"

"If my doll likes pudding then my doll is getting pudding"

You two are the type of couple to send a photo of cute animals too eachother and say its you.

Whenever he gets a message from you like that he's just

💕💞💓💗

Cuddles all the time.

You actually can't get rid of him when he wants to cuddle.

Will annoy the shit out of you until you give in

Poking,squeezing,bumping WHINING

But if it still takes to long (in his opinion)

He will just lift you up

Lay you on the couch and flop down on top of you

Good luck trying to get him off then lol

You had work today? Classes?

Not anymore better call in sick.

Since you have such a sweettooth

90% of the time dabi comes home with some sort of candy/pastry you haven't tried yet.

At this point its just

You want it?

Dabi gets it.

Don't even have to ask

He just knows for some reason

Dabi is super soft for you as well and you make him extremely happy!

Lowkey feel like im having a block 😀 but requests are open!

I love you all! Take care of yourself💞

Drink some water and take your meds💞

Lxvebun<33

Read my DNI before interacting

[bunycube]

!!! hi again (sorry in advance for the very long message ,_,)

wait so do you mean that there is not english translation of Lamento ? so like if i were to download it I'd need to play it in Japanese ? o.o and like find a translation and read from there at the same time !? heck :")

ominous yes!! but there's something really nice about it ??!!

💀💀 not me imagining Tetsuo as a cardboard box now ksndjdjdj i see what you mean tho still i love him nonetheless :') i think he's just a lil bit shy and quiet, keeps to himself alot.. i feel like he's never really had any close friends,, maybe any friends at all i liked seeing glimp of soft and gentle Tetsuo :') there were some really cute and tender moment with Youji too (well as cute and tender as it can be given the circumstances lolol) it's fun to imagine what they all could have been like without all this innerbeings stuff fuckin them all up

it's ok to feel so close to Youji even if you don't know why 😊♡ and YEAAAS i felt the same same same about Z!!!! :"))) very interested to hear more of your thoughts about him if you ever feel like writing them down 👀👀

skdjdjdj entire cities apart made me laugh but true :^) tho even if he left his dad and all that the hell within would still follow him,,, he can't help that he been dragged into all this by his dad and he literally has no escape ,_,

hahajjsjsjsjs i know now there are no sweet endings lmao i can't say i didnt know at first because i had been warned but STILLLLLL i wasnt expecting that from Makoto!!!!! for that end to be so unhinged x') i thought he'd be the less bad difjfjdj

i do like to also imagine something where they someone all get free from the nonsense and just get to have normal lives and happiness ;_;

LOL i dont remember the ugly outfit :"))) i wasn't sure about Rin at first like ,,,, what's his angle,,, he is just pretending to be nice,,, why so mysterious,,,, he did grow on me but idk idk

aw im sorry Nano's made you feel that way :'( i love him very much :'):

aaaa i wasn't sure what to think of Motomi in all the other routes i was very mmm🤔🤔🤔🤔mmm but when i did his route i was like !!!!😍😍😍!!!!!

yeah Akira was alright but Aoba probably remains my fav protagonist(is that the right word??) and and i loved Takeru alot too , before he died when he sees like his sister and his parents and ;_; made me cry lowkey wish he had a route too ~ aND IT'S OK I LOVE GUNJI TOO WOAA

i like Arbitro too a little for some reason there's just something about him ,,,,, but his route was really underwhelming to me ??? idk i was expecting more from him

NO NEED TO APOLOGIZE!! RAMBLE AWAY very interesting to read someone being excited about what they are talking about !! :)))))))

never apologize for long messages!!! i love em! response under cut

there IS an eng translation for lamento! its just a pretty long process to download it haha. i was saying that i had to download some dvd mounting thing to get it to work snfbsb the game itself is fully translated, no worriesbthere!!

yesyes its like kimda ominous but still calming w all rhe quiet sunset empty classroom vibez...you know....

😭😭 oh yeah i get u, i think tetsuo is just a reserved kid plus he prob felt like he didnt fit in very well? thats just me guessing but he seems like that kind of guy...i think hes the same as youji in that respect, both of them kimd of quiet n awkward n not teh type to easily make friends :) he does some pretty bad things but im like sigh well its this kind of game so ofc that happens...besides that i think hes just an awkward quiet kid who looks rly intimidating like hes not bad once u start talking to him. i lovednsome of his gentler scenes w youji, my favs when they were eating ramen and tetsuo picks out the bamboo shoots from youjis bowl bc he doesnt like them...it made me so 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 i also loved when youji was showing him pics of his nephew ...idk idk sp is so dark but i loveee gentler scenes like this its so 💔 to me that they manage to find moments of peace despite everything around them...

oh true i thought abt this too...no matter how far zenya runs away he can never escape bc the thing thats causimg all his problems is his own body, so he just cant run away from it or do anything abt it ;___; poor boy he never asked for this n his whole life is just doomed from tjebstart bc of his shitty father...

if i started talking abt why i like zenya we would be here ALLL LDAY and rhis post would literslly never end lol i just like analysing him and how everythign hes been through shapes his actions and behaviour n all hmmmm

OH YES...sweetnpool normal au :))) i lvoe to imagine it i feel like tetsuo youji n makoto would hang our together n zenya is that one guy no one invited but he jsut joined in anyway n the others dont rlycwant him there but well. hes there now

lmaoo this is the ugly outfit

ohh yeah i was thinking abt this yesterday too and aoba is hands-down my fav chiral protag!,$& i jusr love him sm his personality design everything is chef kiss hes so fun and lovely and means sm to me. hes very comforting to me personally as well and hes just a special boy...tho i love the other protags as well haha

OH YEAH i loved takeru too wtfff i wasnso sad when he died bc he had never had antthing good ivhis life n thenche dies SO BRUTALLY...and he jsut wantednto help his family it made me v sad :( they spent sm time on him i fully expected him to atleast have an ending so when he died i was like huh, wiat what 😭😭😭😭

ngl, arbitro makes me sick 2 my stomach for reasons u prob already know but he surprisingly isnt relevant ti the plot st all? so i keep forgetting abt him. i liked how campy his design was but thats it. hecmakes me sick !!! yeah jdbfbd

same for u! i lovenreading lomg responses haha i always ramble a lot so i feel less guilty if the person also writes a long reoly, beside its very fun to read and respond to!

[spade-snax]

Alright! Here goes my Bugsnax Grumpus last name headcanon!

(This ended up being way longer than I thought it would've been, oh god-)

I think we all can agree that the headcanon where a Grumpus child has their parent's combined last names as their own last name is a very common headcanon people share. It's a good one! Even I like it a lot. And when applied to OCs or fankids it makes for some hilarious names.

It'd make sense in-canon and I feel like it gives the Grumpus world more depth as their own little tradition. (Honestly give me ANY culture/tradition headcanon for Grumpuses PLEASE THOSE ARE MY FAVORITEEEE I even had one for teeth a while ago that I may share publicly one day!!)

But I've been thinking about this, especially because of Cromdo and my own OCs - Neddy and Rason Honeyfidget. With Rason being Neddy's dad, if we only used this headcanon then Neddy shouldn't have this last name... Well, there's a lore reason why he doesnt and that is that his mother has died while he was still an egg, a while before hatching. Rason made him take on "Honeyfidget" only.

But that's just the backstory that got me thinking at the name traditions as a whole, so I'll try to avoid OC talk any further to make this friendlier for others who do not know about my OCs and are just interested in reading this headcanon.

Another headcanon I want to mention as I apply it to my own is the headcanon that Triffany changed her last name to Bronica's last name as a way to honor her. You can definitely change your name to anything you want in the Grumpus world, but changing your last name to a relative's like your grandparent's last name is possibly quite common!

And now I want to bring up Cromdo and the fact he is divorced. It has been confirmed that Cromdo is divorced and that his name may reflect that. (Though originally it was answered in the AMA that "Cromdo Face" just sounded funny at first and that it is possible that he did loose a half of his last name this way!)

Also I want to say that he wasn't abusive to the child mentioned! I remember there was a small confusion and drama about that. And I believe one of the devs on the YH discord mentioned that the 1# tie was a reference to Octodad. I do not remember if that confirmed that he is a father or if this answer by Sage was possibly wrong. He cannot see the child because he lost custody of them and lost in court. I do not have screenshot evidence of this. On a side-note I believe this could be one of the reasons he grew to be so money hungry. He didn't have enough money back then to keep his child. Again I want to say it could be ONE of the reasons and not the exact reason why he is this way.

This is more so of an ramble about my headcanon and what I want to say rather than some comprehensive thing, I am so sorry dfwergeg it's just how I write and explain things and I gotta mention it ALL (Great addition to "Guzma, your ADHD is showing")

Anyways, back on track with my HC.

But in this/my headcanon - Cromdo is divorced, he has had a child, and lost a part of his last name because of the divorce. I do not know how human marriage last name and stuff works properly so uh, see this as just speculation about a fictional species' culture rather than a carbon copy of our own. Which it clearly isn't LOL

I personally think that you can do multiple things with your last name when you get married! (And how it can affect the child's last name!)

Let's use Chandlo and Snorpy as examples, because I think they make great last name combinations. (And Snorplo is HELLA !!/pos)

- You can change your last name to your partner's last name, like we do commonly. (At least, with all the cultures I'm aware of and how marriage works for us.) Examples: Snorpy Funkbun, Chandlo Fizzlebean

(This one isn't very common to do!)

- You can change one half of your last name to a half from your partner's last name. Examples: Snorpy/Chandlo Funkbun/Fizzlebun

(Not as common either, but it still happens. It is actually more common than the first example. This was the case for Cromdo. I'll get back to this later. Grumps usually reserve this for their childen, which is the most common way of naming your children!)

- You keep your last name after marriage! Example: Snorpy Fizzlebean. Chandlo Funkbun. Canon examples would be Wambus and Triffany as well!

(Most common one to do as many wear their last names with pride or for other reasons - such as Trifanny when she changed her last name to Bronica's last name in this headcanon.)

Before we get to the kids again, I'm gonna go back to Cromdo and what can happen during divorce.

During divorce you can simply change your name back if you changed it, or keep the last name you took from your partner. Many simply change their last names back to what they were originally. Some, if they went by the half/half method, take away the half from their ex-partner only. This leaves some Grumpuses with one worded last names, such as Cromdo.

I think he changed a half of his last name during marriage. After the divorce, he didn't want to "wear" his partner's name anymore and changed his name to Cromdo Face only as Face was a part of his last name he was given at birth. This is most often the default for Grumpuses who have been divorced and took only half of their partner's last name.

If Cromdo - (or any Grumpus with a one-word last name! There's certainly rare cases of Grumpuses who have one word that didn't go through divorce. Possibly Grumpuses with bad attachment to one of their parents - so they change or remove that half of the last name they got from said parent. If their last name was a combination.) - were to re-marry he could take one half of his new partner's last name, or not change his name at all.

I want to get onto how naming a child would work with this situation, so I will talk about ways of naming children before I get back to this! And by naming I of course mean the last names only, lol.

(One rule is that, unless you change your name later in real life for any reason, it's gonna have to be one of these otherwise! Your Grump parent cannot make you up a new last name. It is just a part of the tradition they have. Though re-naming isn't looked upon in any way by the majority of Grumpuses as there are many reasons to do so!! Unless you're a jerk or you value your last name TOO much.) (Also when I say "you" I don't mean YOU as the reader literally. I mean a hypothetical Grumpus child!! It's just how I like wording things.

(...I've been writing for almost an hour, brain scrampled eg)

- Your last name is the combined name of your parent's last names. Examples: Fizzlebun, Funkbean

(VERY COMMON! Most Grumpuses will do this when first naming their child!)

- Your keep one of your parent's last name! Fizzlebean or Funkbun.

(This all works if you have multiple parents btw! Can make for SUPER crazy long and funny last names. This *all* applies to marriage, too! I hope it is easily applicable. I do not want to go in depth on that. Feel free to hit me an ask about this if you want me to explain it more in depth!! I wouldn't want to exclude polyamorous relationships ^^ )

(Also yes, last names that are just the same word repeated twice/multiple times are possible too. Fizzlefizzle, Funkfunk... How fun are these to say? Gives me Grumpus OC name ideas already.)

But yes! Back to Cromdo! Or any Grumpus in the same situation, but as I've stater earlier, Cromdo is just an example here. If he were to re-marry and NOT change his name, there's two posibilities:

His new partner has a full last name.

In this situation, if they have a child they can keep the full last name from Cromdo's partner. Or they can have one word from his partner + Face. For reasons stated below the child cannot have "Face" as their only last name.

His new partner has a one-worded, short last name like he does.

In this situation, if they have a child they have to name it a combination of their last name's. No exception. Having a short last name is a sign of something happening in your life, and it is traditionally not put onto a child, unless they are adopted with no last name. That still counts as something that happened in their life, as their birth parents possibly just gave them away with no care in the world.

------------------------------------------

At this point I am almost completely off track, so please do ask me questions as I am not sure where I completely left off - Or rather if there is something I forgot that I wanted to mention.

By the way, for combining last names and such, you can also mis-match! Doesn't even have to be combinations. This applies to everything, even for (Full last name + one-word last names) where it makes sense the most. Examples: Beanfizzle, Bunfunk, Bunbean, Bunfizzle, Beanbun, Beanfunk. I'm personally a big fan of Bunfunk and Beanbun :P)

And this applies to siblings, too! It isn't uncommon for parents naming their children mis-matched last name combinations if they have multiple ones. (This ties into my headcanon for Filbo's many siblings and that he isn't a single child. He's in a big household and has at least 2 siblings. ONE OF WHICH I want to make into an OC! This requires me to make the parents, too, but I am not so bothered about that :P)

I'm out for now, all my brain power has left me a few paragraphs ago and I've got to go eat lunch

But again I encourage people to ask me questions (If anyone was brave enough to read through this!!)

And if I got anything wrong, do let me know! I am not all-knowing and I could've missed some VERY OBVIOUS mistakes.

And sorry if the writing is wonky at times! Sometimes it is done on purpose but sometimes the fact I only pretend I know how to write + the fact English is my second language IS SHOWING

(Also I sometimes just write how I think, without much thought put into the sentence if I don't proof read, so HSDFWERGRGT)

[sixstepsaway]

Parents being shitty about pets seems to be a common trend, Im sorry you have to deal with all of this! Your dad agreeing to dogsit when he's not going to be doing any of the work and he knows he's got ducks at home is??? A new level of dad bullshit??? What's wrong with him. Pets are so much work when you actually care about their wellbeing instead of thinking of them as living toys that move around your house that you just need to feed, and yet. That last one is the vibe of anyone over 40 with kids I've met in my life and I'm like "aah this explains so much about how you parent too now that I think about it".

6 ducks sounds like hell on earth during mating season honestly, specially if they're pets and not farm animals. I love birds but they're all in for doing horrible things to each other by human standars lol

For my birthday six years ago my parents got me an amazon parrot without consulting me first and Im still like : / this was shitty of them absolutely no thought put into consequences. Like I love this bird! I like keeping birds! I had a lovebird at the time that sadly died a year later bc of an egg she couldn't lay, I dont remember what that's called in english. The amazon parrot hated her (they're pretty aggro to other birds) so I spent that year trying to find a balance between taking care of both of them, it was Hell. He's sweet enough to the other people in the household (it took. So much work to pull this off. Why would they buy a bird then not respect that he's not a dog and cant be socialized like one) and he tolerates me doing nearly whatever to him bc Im his favorite but other pets? People who don't live with us? He wants them Away From Him and if they ignore his warnings he also wants them Dead by his own beak

Parrots are so fucking high maintenance (in time effort and money) that while there's only one of him, I'm still essentially trapped at home until I save up enough to buy a house myself, and only if I keep doing work from home (which I can do, Im in tech), bc they need either your full attention or multiple people handling them to make up for not having 20 birds, and you cannot have one of these in an apartment lol he's loud as hell. Tbf this does line up with what I vaguely wanted out of life 6 years ago, like buying a house in the country and becoming an old hermit witch, and I get along with my parents so living at home isn't that bad but. Would have liked it to be a choice you know? That I could have chosen to try living on my own before I hit 40 and commiting to a house if I wanted to? I wanted to have cats and now this is fully off the table forever

Also there's like one vet that knows birds in this entire city so the idea of the parrot getting sick is so anxiety inducing. And his life expectancy is about 60 years so either he outlives me or I get him killed by mistake which are both bad options for how his life ends. It's like they heard me say I dont want kids and then they got me a very sharp feathery forever toddler that loves any idea that leads directly to his death, like trying to chew wiring or fight the dog bc the kibble is obviously for him. Like I love him but it feels like my entire life revolves around meeting his needs and he's never going to stop depending on me

okay, trying this again with an extension that can recover lost text this time :) since my tab refreshed mid-reply last time.

oh it doesnt do tumblr. nice. okay, whatever. i'll just save this as a draft every 5 minutes. manual autosave, what a conundrum.

putting this under a read more since i assume it will get lengthy again and this will make it more avoidable

Parents being shitty about pets seems to be a common trend, Im sorry you have to deal with all of this! Your dad agreeing to dogsit when he's not going to be doing any of the work and he knows he's got ducks at home is??? A new level of dad bullshit??? What's wrong with him.

the short answer is 66 years of undiagnosed ADHD. the long answer is: so fucking much.

a few things he's done to me over the years, truncated as much as possible to avoid trauma dumping:

shouted at me that i was "being obnoxious" during a fight, left, then came back 40 minutes later and banned me from my chat room (my only social contact at that point in my life) for a week for calling him obnoxious (✨ i did not ✨)

convinced me to watch firefly with him at 11-ish years old and then used my agreeing to watch seven episodes to make me watch tv with him every single night for the next god knows how many years, including, but not limited to, all the star treks (except enterprise, he got bored), buffy, angel, the x files (which at the time i hated because i couldnt work out what they were saying and it was too dark to see), the wire, and babylon 5 (which I loved)

decided then that saturdays were movie nights, despite me hating movies (less so these days)

flipped his entire shit when i told him i couldnt go watch tv with him one night because my best friend was suicidal and i couldnt leave her. declared if we didnt go in there and watch tv then we "never will again!" and so i said "okay" and we never did again

threatened to divorce my mom a week later over a period of a hellish four days because he said she'd 'slapped him in the face' by playing Crazy Taxi with me for 10 minutes before the time we used to watch tv (it wasnt even the time we watched tv)

stopped talking to me for 2-3 months literally last year because i couldn't help him with his headphones. he'd literally walk out of any room i was in, ignore me to the point he didnt even acknowledge when i spoke, and made my life an absolute hell of hurt feelings because holy fucking shit

assorted events of "you told me no so i am going to be angry until tomorrow and make it your problem" and "you disagreed with me so now i'm storming out because fuck you" and "something outside of you made me mad so i'm taking it out on you" which. egh. i was also trapped with my PC in the same room as his until i turned 27 and built my own damn PC up here

We also had a dog when I was... 12? 11? He was running down the middle of the street unattended and when no one claimed him as a stray we ended up keeping him for the rest of his (nicely long) life. He had so much anxiety I cannot overstate it. He was terrified of walks, of baths, of people, of not being near people, of separation, of leaving the house, of everything.

My dad tried to walk him a few times and when he wasn't instantly obedient my dad stopped trying. He drove us all out to the park once, and when the dog freaked out and wouldn't stop barking, he punished the dog (AND MY MOM AND I) by making us all go home, no matter how mom and I felt about it. He never took the dog out again.

He's completely unreliable too. The dog we're sitting is named Jess (yes, I know, but Jess isn't my birth name so they don't know how fucking funny it is that I have to go "Jess!" to call a dog to me, or how funny it is to listen to them speak to said dog) and last time she stayed (last September) she spent most of her time up here with me. When my dad would start yelling at his PC, she'd just come up here and sit near me (I am quiet and peaceful and I don't rant and rave very often, if at all). She ended up sleeping the nights on my bed, which was lovely, and he knew this.

I woke up midday the one day to hear, "What do you think you're doing? Get down those stairs! How dare you! How dare you! Get down those stairs!" and him charging off to rant at my mom that Jess had come upstairs (??) and wouldn't listen when he gave her directly contradictory orders.

Absolutely toxic. He used to do things like this to our dog too.

On top of that, he's utterly irresponsible. All the ducks were out and about on the floor the other morning and he decided he wanted to recharge his car battery, so he opened the front door and left it open, which left my mom and I to herd the ducks home quickly so they wouldn't run outside.

It made me shake with rage, I am not kidding.

[saves this, lmao]

When he stopped talking to me for literal months, he made my mom so ill with his behavior and eventually she just snapped and refused to tolerate it. Told him straight up she wasn't participating in his childish behavior and has actually been much better since this because she doesn't put up with his shit nearly as much.

I'm also not putting up with his shit as much, because, well, I've already experienced Worst Case Scenario... what do I have to lose?

We're getting along better now because of it, I think. He knows that not even not talking to me will make me cowtow and apologize for something I didn't need to apologize for.

(maybe this is why I'm so defensive of Izzy as well? Ed's response to him was not proportional and nor was my dad's to me! Even if I'd gone, "oh my god dad fuck off i'm not helping you with your fucking headphone issue jesus" (which I did not, by the way, I said two things: "I can't because my bluetooth won't work properly on my headphones [which you want to borrow] and I can only hook it up to my phone rn because of it" and "I really do not want you to send my headphones back as I am fine with what I have and I put stickers on my headphones, so I don't want to lose those") being cut off for 2+ months was not proportional punishment and was utterly ridiculous and overblown and it makes me go "the fuck?" when people say izzy deserved his overblown punishment)

When he finally started talking to me again he didn't apologize or anything btw. He'd received an email from Psych UK about his ADHD screening and needed a form filled in by a friend or family member and needed me to do it. He told mom about it and was all upsetti because I wasn't ~involved~ anymore (I'm the one that told him he has ADHD, I'm the one that pushed for the diagnosis for both of us etc, I spearheaded and supported him through the whole thing) and I told mom I'd do the form, just give me the link I needed, and I did. It was important. And also I am a sucker.

He came upstairs, thanked me for doing the form and acted as though he hadn't been ignoring my very existence for multiple months. He never apologized, he just snapped back to normal like that was acceptable behavior!!

[saves again and glares at tumblr]

Pets are so much work when you actually care about their wellbeing instead of thinking of them as living toys that move around your house that you just need to feed, and yet. That last one is the vibe of anyone over 40 with kids I've met in my life and I'm like "aah this explains so much about how you parent too now that I think about it".

Before this, I used to refer to myself as his dopamine dispenser. He'd want to play me music or show me clips or whatever because it made him Happy or whatever. He's learned after this not to take my attention for granted: I don't have to give it to him. What's he gonna do? Stop talking to me again? Fuck off then. His damn loss.

We're getting along a lot better these days, actually, so there's that, and mom is still in "fuck you" mode lmao. But he's still awful and irresponsible and does things like agreeing for us to dogsit when we have six ducks, one of which is highly traumatized from the older duck's behavior and lashes out and hurts the other ducks as a stress response.

Six ducks is so lovely when it isn't mating season yeah. Lapis (a drake but we thought she was a hen so here we are) spends all her time trying to mount and stuff the other ducks and they keep getting hurt and now we have to keep them separated until she calms her tits, which is fine except guess who doesn't always separate them? Dad. He just lets it happen because he thinks we're causing her distress by not letting her run roughshod over all the other ducks. His basic thought process seems to be "Lapis is a boy and thusly should be allowed to fuck anything desired, regardless of hurting them, injuring them, traumatizing them or drowning them" which she nearly did to Shadow the one day and he would not separate them.

I love birds but they're all in for doing horrible things to each other by human standars lol

the sheer amount of ducky gang bangs i have now been witness to cannot be overstated.

For my birthday six years ago my parents got me an amazon parrot without consulting me first and Im still like : / this was shitty of them absolutely no thought put into consequences.

Pets should never be surprise presents. Never. It's irresponsible to thrust a little life into someone's arms like, "Surprise! A gift!"

Lovebirds are so cute, I'm so sorry for your loss. In English we call what you described 'egg binding', and it gives me a lot of stress and anxiety in regards to our own birds. I worry about them a lot.

I just (having already replied to this once lol) realized they got you the parrot while you already had a pet bird? What the hell? That's awful decision making!!! Having a new pet should always, always be the owner's choice to make, not something thrust on them, especially when they already have a pet!

I didn't know parrots were so high maintenance, or that they were so grumpy towards other people. I'm sorry you're stuck because of him. I know how it feels to feel stuck despite loving the little creature that's sticking you; it sucks. It really sucks.

Would have liked it to be a choice you know? That I could have chosen to try living on my own before I hit 40 and commiting to a house if I wanted to? I wanted to have cats and now this is fully off the table forever

Yeah, I get that entirely. I've been wanting to get out of this house for literally years, but my health has been so poor I've been unable to get a job (my resume is...not great), let alone hold one down if I managed. Now I'm doing better, I don't feel great about leaving the ducklings, and I definitely can't leave the clingy older duck I've convinced to trust and love me.

Also there's like one vet that knows birds in this entire city so the idea of the parrot getting sick is so anxiety inducing.

god yeah. We've had some horrible experiences with vets for our ducks in the past, because normal vets don't have a fucking clue how to treat birds and don't tend to say that! I ended up looking up specifically avian vets (and found a parrot website listing avian vets) and I found a really highly rated avian vet 20 minutes from me. I've never felt so relieved in my life.

And his life expectancy is about 60 years so either he outlives me or I get him killed by mistake which are both bad options for how his life ends.

Yep. I don't have the extent of 60 years, but my ducks will hopefully live 10 years or so, unless we get them killed somehow. I don't want the latter, but if I continue to feel I can't leave them? That means another decade in this house, living in this shoebox bedroom I've long since outgrown.

It's like they heard me say I dont want kids and then they got me a very sharp feathery forever toddler that loves any idea that leads directly to his death, like trying to chew wiring or fight the dog bc the kibble is obviously for him. Like I love him but it feels like my entire life revolves around meeting his needs and he's never going to stop depending on me

I am so sorry they did that to you. I really, truly am. I hope you find a way one day to strike some kind of balance so you don't have to revolve your entire life around him, but even if you can't, I hope you manage to be fulfilled and happy either way :(

It really, really sucks when you love what equates to basically being an anchor.

[alltheselights]

Hi. I have seen someone ask somewhat related to the topic question i want to discuss. I am too afraid right now to actually talk about it to people near me, but i am in nagging pain right now for what could be true or what not.

I am married, but i fear this one close friend of my spouse to be more than just a friend.He didnt introduce her to me just recently, i know her from pretty much ever since i moved with him. I've never had suspicions on my partner before ever,we've been married for 7 years. But now from past month, i am being suspicious. And i am too scared to confront worrying what if its just a suspicion and how asking it might affect our relationship or my spouse might think i dont trust him. But also what if its true?How do i get my peace of mind?

So whats making me suspicious is, there is one bracelet this friend owns, it has initial of her and my partner's first name.(I also have a bracelet with mine and my partners initials which he gifted me) . I asked my partner about the name of this friend's boyfriend (about whom he mentioned to me long ago). So i ve come to know her bf's name has different initial. Then i considered her full name, which also doesn't have common initials as my spouse. I wonder if the initials are common with anyone else close in her life, a parent maybe? I don't know. But its not just a bracelet which is worrying me. Also our new house is under construction. It is going to be a big house, so we have assigned rooms to each his family member living back in our home country (We are abroad), but he also asigned one room which is supposed to be a guest room as this friends room which even his sister found weird(his family have also met her already) . . Since we are abroad, i dont know the language here. He often picks up her calls (they also work together so) and talks just casually which(her calls) has never been an issue for me, until it started to bother me. Just recently she was with her little niece when my spouse called her on phone. She seemed preoccupied with her at that moment and also ofcourse was talking in her language with my husband and her niece since she doesnt know english much. And then i ve heard these three words which are just stuck in my mind. Those words mean 'this is my husband' which i assume she was answering to her niece. i dont know the language very well(but i know these words) , i quickly confirmed through google and one native speaker if thats what it meant. But since i dont know the whole context, i couldnt confront or ask them.

Since language is always a barrier between us so i am always confuse what she says, but this one time my child was playing with her, like jumping on her etc and she made a comment like 'strong like daddy/just like his dad', which i found weird. Another day, my kid has this habit of running towards a person and hugs them. Consider a a little kid's and grown person's height and he/she just run towards you basically hugging your legs. She said something which also includes 'Papa' and i just could not comprehend.

What would you advice me in this situation?

My advice for things like this is always to talk to them. It’s not like you’re being paranoid out of nowhere, which is often related to a person’s own past or trauma rather than their partner’s behavior. You’re feeling this way because of things you’ve actually seen or heard. If there is no explanation or he reacts in a way that you find suspicious, it might be time to consider getting out of your current situation, as difficult as that might be. Always protect yourself and your child first. Sending you love and wishing you the best, bub!

[yourfeminist]

All of the asks. If you don't want to answer some that's fine, I'd be interested in all of them ☺️

Hell yeah i’m down! Thank you a lot! Have a nice day or evening! 

zinc white; how are you really feeling today? no one-word answers please!

Well I woke up today and I thought I had to work at 8AM but I didn’t need to work so that kinda sucked. But otherwise then that I’m fine! I need to do a few things today so I look forward to do that! Thanks for asking 

lemon; what’s your comfort food?

Chocolate!

hansa yellow; what’s your guilty pleasure song?

Rich Girl by Daryl Hall & John Oates!

yellow ochre; name an artist/band whom you just discovered & can’t get enough of! 

I recently discovered Billie Eilish and she’s pretty cool. But other than her I don’t remember any new album I listened to

naples yellow; where do you feel most at home?

Well my parents are divorced so ngl at my dads I feel more home because there are a lot of other people and I enjoy that. But when I’m at my moms I really love my room and that feels like home too. So I can’t decide :)

raw sienna; with whom do you feel most at home?

My (girl)friendgroup and one friend specifically that always makes me feel like home. When we are at the same party I always feel less awkward or uncomfortable ( I have social anxiety and sometimes it’s really acting up). So I’m really glad that he has that feeling. 

golden ochre; describe the relationship you have with your closest friend.

We can talk about everything but still we don’t always do. We have a great friendship and sure do love each other but we don’t say things like that to each other. We also see each other pretty often. One of my best friends💕

golden deep; what’s your favorite season?

This anwser always changes but atm It’s spring! I really enjoy the weather where you don’t have to wear a jacket just a hoodie because of the sun! Yup really love that. OH AND everything starts to grow again :)

cadmium orange; what do you like to do on your days off?

Watch youtube video’s, watch a few episodes of a show, reading and mostly relax!

orange lake; do you have anyone you can turn to when you’re sad?

yup I do but this girl right here is kinda dumb because I never talk to anyone because I have this feeling that when I do I bother other people. And I know I don’t but still I won’t do it haha. But I’m working on it! So if anyone has the same feeling feel free to come to me or ask me how I’m dealing with that.

titans; do you prefer slow mornings or relaxing evenings?

Both! But I prefer evenings a little more. Because then I see my family and friends more ( i know cliche :p)

shakhnazaryan red; are you currently binge-watching anything?

BROOKLYN NINE-NINE!!!!!!(cool cool cool cool cool no doubt no doubt) And I’m watching Teen Wolf for the second time haha

red ochre; are you more right-brained (creative) or left-brained (analytical)?

Right brained!

burnt sienna; is there a painting that brings you peace when you look at it?

Starry Night by Vincent van Gogh! 

english red; what animal do you relate to most?

A CAT!!! LOVE SLEEPING LOVE CUDDLING AND SOMETIMES I LOVE TO BE A GRUMPY FUCK

vermilion; what’s your favorite accent?

Hard one!! I really like Irish ( @bleubelle249SO YOU BETTER HAVE ONE :PPP) and Scottish! But ngl I reaaaally love Australian accents, so hot.

cadmium red; do you have a “type” when it comes to a significant other?

Nope I don’t mind tbh. But dark hair and dark eyes are plus !

scarlet; describe your current crush/es.

Dark haired, dark eyed 6′2 and his name is Noah Centineo and he doesnt even know I exist :). But other than him I don’t have a crush!

ruby; what does your ideal first date look like?

A walk at a park and maybe picknick and a fun activity and dinner later in the afternoon and for the night a movie! But tbh everything is okay, I’m not that hard to statisfy.

carmine; what does your ideal second date look like?

Anything the other person want to do! 

madder lake red; would you ever kiss someone (or accept a kiss) on a first date?

Yes I would. I would only kiss someone if they want to (CONSENT KIDS, ITS IMPORTANT) and I also would accept one if I’m comfortable. But there needs to be a connection tho. Otherwise a quick  peck on the cheeks.

rose; what’s something really positive going on in your life right now?

That I’m working on myself to become a healthier (mentally) me.  Because it took waaaaaaaaaaaaay to long.

quinacridone rose; what’s something you’re really looking forward to?

My drivers licence! 

violet rose; what does your dream house look like?

A very cozy house. Nice, warm with a library and a lot of plants and flowers! A big garden with both sun and shadow. With a few neighbours. And I would love to live at a dead end next to meadow!

violet; is there any place in particular you’d like to settle down?

Somewhere in England, USA or Australia. Maybe somewhere else in Europe, don’t know.

blue lake; what would you like to do/accomplish before you settle down?

That I finished college. I’m financial stable and that I worked hard for the things that I have. I don’t like doing things the easy way.

cobalt blue spectral; what is the most beautiful place you have ever been to?

Český Krumlov in Czech Republic

ultramarine; when was the last time you were in a good mood? do you know/remember what sparked it?

A week ago. I just felt good. Don’t have a reason for it.

blue; what’s the most recent dream you remember?

That I was dating a collegue who is also a friend. it was a really weird dream but I didnt tell anyone because my friends ship us hahahah

bright blue; what does your dream family look like? any kids or pets? how many of each?

I don’t yet if I want kids (or that my partner does) but if I would have kids I want 3 em. And both a dog and a cat!

blue cobalt; do you like your name? would you give yourself a different name if you could? Yes I like my name (Anouk) and no I will not give myself a different name because I don’t think an other name will fit me.

prussian azure; what’s your favorite scent?

Depends on my mood what it is; like a candle or perfume or deodorant. But probably vanilla, lemongrass and citrus.

azure blue; what’s your favorite type of tea, if any?

Earl grey!

turquoise blue; if you could start a garden, what would you plant?

SUNFLOWERS!!!!!!!!!!! And a few trees and nice flowers that grow each year.

cerulean blue; if you were guaranteed to have a viewership, would you start a youtube vlog?

yes probably. I secretly would love that haha

glauconite; describe your body without using any negative adjectives.

Tall, nice skin, long arms and long legs and my stomach kinda has a sixpack.

yellow green; picture yourself walking in a field. what do you see & hear in this scenario?

Probably something like this. But with more high grass. And I soflty hear the wind and a few birds chirping.

green light; are you in a comfortable place in life? if not, what do you think might make it better?

80% of my life is! What do I think might make it better? Me. But don’t know how yet.

green; name three countries you want to visit; do you have any actual plans in place to visit any of them?

1. Italy2. Australia3. New zealand

Yes! They are all three on my bucket list so I will for sure visit them!

emerald green; do you speak any languages besides english? are there any additional languages you want to learn?

Yes I speak: Dutch, Frisian and a tiny bit of German. And I really want to learn Spanish!

oxide of chromium; what’s your favorite book?

That’s way to hard for me to choose. So i am not going to give you an anwser :p

olive green; are you currently reading anything? how do you like it so far?

I am reading the Game of Thrones books. Currently reading A Clash of Kings (second one) 

mars brown; what’s a movie that always puts a smile on your face/makes you laugh?

Coco!! And all the Harry Potter movies!

burnt umber; what’s something you plan to do before the day is over to take care of yourself?

Nothing haha

umber; have you drank enough water today?

Not yet! But it’s still morning so don’t worry!

voronezhskaya black; what or who is your go-to outlet for when you need to vent? 

I don’t vent a lot. And if I do it’s not a go to person. Probably my dad or anyone else from my family or friends

sepia; name five things that always make you happy.

1. Animals2. When people are happy3. When people are smiling 4. Music!5. Kian and Jc (shout out to them, they are youtubers)

indigo; what’s the best/sweetest compliment you have ever received?

That I’m a very relaxed person to be with. My friends told me that when we had a test I’m made them less nervous. And I really like that.

payne’s gray; describe your aesthetic?

Art

black; post a selfie because you are so beautiful!

I would rather not post one but I’ll guess I will post one

There ya go!

Thanks again!