#(by other students* - like today) so I don't encourage them as much as I should have...but...live and learn.

[musicrunsthroughmysoul]

An adorable student who I worked with last year told me today that she has roses in her backyard and, after I told her how much I love roses (they're my favorite flower!), that she'd pick one and bring it to me. 😭 And had I not been literally in the middle of doing the job that is expected of me that I get paid for, I might've cried.

[miyagic]

Family Isn't Blood

James Potter x reader

SUMMARY: James tells his girlfriend jokes, inspired by the ones his father uses to tell his mother, really stupids and not funny at all, but all you can think about is how cute he is to think they are actually funny, what makes you understand something.

MARAUDERS MASTERLIST a/n: You don't have a defined house. Remus and Sirius aren't dating, but they have a thing.

a/n: this is justt fluff, I didn't liked so much, but alright. Tell me what you think!

w/c: 1k

English is not my first language, sorry for any mistakes!!

JAMES looked at Euphemia, who was making their lunch while he and Fleamont set the table. Sirius is still sleeping, normally James wakes up early (not so much), but today he woke up later than usual.

"You should bring your girlfriend next time, Jamie" Euphemia smiled at him.

"I know, mom. I told her to come, but her parents had already planned the trip." James rolled his eyes slightly.

"What trip?" Fleamont asked, not following the conversations about James' infamous girlfriend with Euphemia.

"[Name] went with his parents to Italy" right after she finishes speaking, Sirius comes down the stairs with the greatest laziness ever seen.

"[Name]? She went to Italy?"

"Yes Pads, she said that in front of you" James scoffed.

"She said?"

"Boys, now I really don't care about Sirius' memory loss, I finished lunch and now let's eat" Effie started bringing the food to the table.

Everyone sat at the table, each eating as much as they wanted. Fleamont then looked at the sodas on the table, and started laughing, leaving everyone else confused.

"Fleamont, what's gotten you?" Euphemia looked at him strangely.

"Guys" he laughs, not finishing the sentence. "Guys... I was thinking about something"

"Here it comes," Effie murmured, sighing.

Fleamont laughs a little more "What do you call a can opener that doesn't work?"

"What?" James spoke.

"A can't opener" Fleamont laughs again as if he had said the funniest joke in the world.

James starts laughing like his father, making Sirius join them, Euphemia also laughs, while shaking her head, but not at the joke itself, but at the chaotic family that she love so much.

———☆———

ON THE RETURN to Hogwarts, James and Sirius met Peter and Remus along the way.

"Prongs," Remus called, "Where is [Name]?"

"She's going with her friends on the train, we'll probably only see each other at Hogwarts" James replies, a little sullenly. "Pads?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you remember dad's jokes? My mom always laughs"

"Prongs, no" knowing Monty's jokes, and his friend, Remus intervenes, knowing Sirius would probably only encourage it.

"Moons, if my mother, a woman, likes my father's jokes, [Name] would like them too, and me more, right??" Remus and Peter looked at each other.

"Go and get your girl with the jokes, Prongsie!!" Sirius puts his arm around James's shoulders.

"This is going to be a catastrophe" Peter said, shaking his head and Remus just sighed.

———☆———

LATER, at Hogwarts, all the students sit in the main hall, the new students being sorted. This year, so far, most of them have been sorted into Ravenclaw, some Hufflepuffs, some Gryffindors and a few Slytherins.

At the "marauders table", you sat next to James, across from Remus.

“Princess” James looked at you. Trying to remember his dad jokes.

“Jamie” you look at him, maintaining loving eye contact, James’ eyes looked nervous, almost restless, but confident.

"Do you know what you call a can opener that doesn't work?" he tried to copy his father's tone and phrase.

"Um, no?" You furrow your eyebrows, how a can opener doesn't work at all?

"A can't opener" James started laughing again, really looking like he said the funniest thing in the world. Sirius laughed too.

These man's are not normal.

Remus taps his forehead, sighing and shaking his head while Peter grimaces but smiles a little.

James looks at you expectantly, to which you smile widely, but not at the joke itself.

"Did you like it?" his eyes used to shine, James never stopped smiling, his smile bright and full of teeth.

"Yes, I liked it" you smile, not wanting to ruin his happiness, if it's something he likes, you like it too.

James smiles even more, if that were possible and lets out a dreamy sigh, relaxing his shoulders, "my dad usually tells my mom these jokes. They invited you to spend the next vacation there" James takes your hand "you will, right?"

You shake his hand, "of course, if you want me there that much" he kisses your hand.

"Prongs, why don't you tell the one about the dog?" Sirius slams his hand on the table, grinning like a madman. Remus hits him on the head, whispering "stop", Peter chuckles, as Sirius looks at him with his normal drama.

"Ahh yes!! That one is really good" James laughs "Get ready" he clears his throat, you look at Remus with wide eyes, whatever was coming wasn't good. "Oh, what do you call a magical dog?"

Remus shakes his head furiously at you, but James looked so cute that you couldn't resist asking "how?"

"A Labracadabrador" James laughs madly, bringing tears to his eyes, Sirius laughs just as much. Peter laughs a little too, but not as much as Sirius and James. You and Remus looked at each other.

You look at James, he looked so adorable laughing and actually thinking the jokes are good and you can't help but smile sweetly at him.

"Oh" James gasps "I have another one! Calm down" he takes a deep breath. "Why don't koalas count as bears? Because they don't have the right koalifications" and James bursts into laughter again, Sirius along with him and this time Peter too.

And you can only look at your boyfriend, how sweet he looks right now. James tells another joke, but you don't even hear it, you just look at him, smiling endlessly.

For a moment you even think that it would be impossible for him to actually find the jokes funny, but then you remember: it's James, your playful boyfriend who loves to laugh and especially make others laugh, who he loves to laugh.

So you laugh, not at the joke, but for James. And Remus laughs, for Sirius.

Your little family, full of love, laughter and affection. Your real family, real home. Where you should always be.

And then you understand, as Sirius and Remus also understood, after fighting so hard, that family Isn't blood. Family is your home and you have finally found it.

Your little family.

Your little home.

——————✮——————

[summerclementine27]

Meet Me in The Hallway🌷pt. 1

summary: Mr. Styles has possibly interested Y/N more than his literature classes and she finds herself pining for him over the months.

pairings: professor!harry, student!reader

warnings: small age difference, mentions of smut

word count: 4.7k

note: i wanted to make this one part but it will be too long so there will have to be a part 2

part 2: https://www.tumblr.com/summerclementine27/757559698881986560/meet-me-in-the-hallway-pt2

Tender days of mid-October

As I took my seat in the large lecture hall, a sense of anticipation loomed over me. Today, Mr. Styles was giving us the results of the last literature and theory criticism coursework I had handed in the previous week. This was my third class with him, one of two this school year, the other being Contemporary Literature. Last year, he taught me Introduction to Literature, a mandatory class for my degree. Though I dreaded it at first due to his choice of reading list, I ended up falling in love with the course because of the way he taught it. Some works I initially criticized him for choosing, he ended up using as examples and critiqued them himself, like "The Awakening" by Kate Chopin. Plus, it helped that he was impossibly handsome with his tall frame, tousled brown hair, and piercing green eyes.

When my friends noticed how much I liked his class, they were unfazed. However, as I became somewhat of a teacher’s pet in a class rudimentary compared to the others I took this year—such as Feminism and Literature, Historical Narratives in Fiction, and Postcolonial Literary Criticism—they realized that maybe the tall, green-eyed man was what had really piqued my interest, not discussing "Middlemarch" for four classes.

On days when I had his class, I dressed extra nicely, sometimes even daring to pair a clean collared shirt with a shorter-than-usual skirt. One time, I even left my wool trench coat on during the first period and stood up from my auditorium seat to take it off. Sitting in the back, the rows of chairs likely covered the lower part of my body, but I was sure the space between my long boots and short skirt was visible from his vantage point. Surely, my abrupt standing would grab his attention. What I didn’t anticipate was him pausing in the middle of a long train of thought to stare, then quickly catching himself and stuttering before continuing seamlessly as I knew he would. My friend Anika, seated in one of the front rows, noticed and turned to see what had caught his attention. To her dismay, I was playing games with someone totally unattainable again. But she knew I thrived on academic validation, and this little crush of mine would only drive me to excel in more classes.

"Are you serious, Y/N? He's our professor." she exclaimed once.

"I know, but he's just... different."

"Different? Or is it the way he looks at you when you answer a question?"

"Maybe both. Besides, this crush is making me work harder. You can't argue with the results."

"Just be careful. I don't want you getting hurt."

In fact, it drove me to do more than that. One time, Mr. Styles noticed my passion for poetry after I shamelessly defended the works of Sylvia Plath with a controversial view that modern poetry should not shy away from the stark realities of mental health. He gave me a few poetry anthologies and compilations, including his annotated copies. I fawned over reading his notes and even emailed him once, pretending that I had "accidentally" annotated something, forgetting it wasn’t my own copy after losing myself in the literature. He replied kindly:

Mr. Styles: "Please, feel free to annotate as much as you like. I would be honored to have your opinions inked on my favorite copies."

By the next semester, after encouraging me to join the poetry society, Mr. Styles nominated me for president, and I was thrilled to win. He insisted on celebrating, gently grasping my upper arm and smiling warmly as he said he expected nothing less. I brought a bottle of wine to his office, where he had asked me to meet him, only to find the entire poetry society there, ready to congratulate me. The gathering lingered for a few delightful hours before everyone left, leaving just the two of us to clean up.

"You really impressed everyone tonight, Y/N. Not that I'm surprised." He began once we were truly all alone.

"Thank you, Mr. Styles. I couldn't have done it without your support."

"Well, you deserve it. By the way, outside of class and school hours, you can call me Harry." He said in his thick Manchester accent.

"Only if you stop calling me Ms. Y/L/N." I joked.

"Hey! I only do that sometimes. Plus, I can't call out to you in class like, 'Y/N, will you read the next slide?' People will think..."

"...think I’m the teacher’s favorite?" I finished his sentence with a teasing smile.

I couldn’t take the lingering stares and supposedly accidental touches we were both guilty of. But I knew that if I really wanted this, if I wanted to be more than just a student he regretted being tempted by when I graduated, then I had to play the long game.

And indeed I did. I kept up my habit of always showing up well-dressed in elegant coats and well-fitting clothing. I accentuated my features with a light coat of makeup, even if I had to apply it on a bumpy bus ride to campus. I even signed up for his office hours, despite really not needing them, just to exchange thoughts and opinions under the guise of “wanting to make sure I'm on the right track.” I wanted him to get to know me more, to realize that despite my youth, I was mature and thoughtful.

At the start of the second year, he emailed me to come to campus a few times in August, a month before the start of term, to discuss my responsibilities as the founder of the debate team. The idea sparked in his mind after I excelled in the heated debate he chose to hold as our first-year final assessment. He was so in awe that he went as far as saying I could compete at a national level on the English debate team, which neither of us was certain of, but I accepted the compliment.

Our earlier meetings were spent cooped up in his office, reviewing why the last debate team failed almost a decade ago and planning the structure for the new team. We discussed everything from team dynamics to potential debate topics, ensuring we were prepared for any challenge.

On one of the hotter days in August, we took our meeting to the university courtyard, having grown tired of experiencing the last bursts of England’s so-called summer from his office window. It was a beautiful window, and a big one at that, but it didn’t compare to actually being outside. That day, I realized the majority of planning for the next few months had already been accomplished in our first few meetings, and I got the hint that he didn’t actually need my help now that I had settled everything I could that wasn’t on an administrative level. So naturally, I decided to have a little fun.

I was wearing penny loafers with black tailored pants that I got fitted for when I visited my mum in London in July. I had paired them with a light knit sweater that fit slightly loosely over my shoulders, often falling down to reveal a collarbone. When I saw him take off his blazer and loosen his tie, I took that as my green light to take off something of my own, knowing I was wearing a neat white tank top underneath. As I slipped the sweater off, covering my face with the fabric, I could see his face through the thin material, making out his features and briefly noticing his eyes on my body. Sitting up straight, I managed to remove the sweater from over my head neatly. Once he saw my face, a soft blush made it to his own.

"Did I mess up my hair?" I asked, as if I hadn’t planned on brushing down the strands that had likely gone astray or as if I was oblivious to the fact that I had just taken off my sweater in front of him.

"Um, yeah, a bit at the top," he said, chuckling as if he wasn’t just clearing his throat in a flustered manner before my face was revealed from under the sweater.

To my surprise, he reached out, inching himself closer to where I was sitting on the bench we shared. With two fingers, his index and middle, he gently brushed down the messy hair on either side of the top of my head.

"Thank you, Harry," I said softly.

However, nothing could have prepared me for what would happen later this year.

As the class settled down to receive their marks on the literature and theory criticism coursework, Mr. Styles walked in, dressed in a well-fitted navy suit with a crisp white shirt. He took off his coat and placed it on the edge of his desk, a departure from his usual habit of draping it over the back of his chair. He wasted no time before pulling out the papers from his leather satchel and making his way down the aisles of the lecture hall, passing out the papers to everyone. When he read out my name, I watched as his eyes searched for me across the hall, darting from one side of the room to the other. It was unlike me to skip his class, so he knew all he had to do was find me. I hadn’t planned this specific event, but I enjoyed it, nonetheless. Once he found me, he smiled sheepishly, yet much more subtly than he did when we were alone and made his way to me.

"Excellent work, Y/L/N," he said as he gently placed the papers on my desk. "I especially appreciate the effort of handwriting this," he remarked, although everyone knew he didn’t care if papers were written by hand or typed on a computer.

I had deliberately written my paper by hand after he replied to an email of mine. I had thanked him for letting me borrow his books, and his response was a charming note saying he’d enjoyed reading my annotations and adored my handwriting. For once, I was glad that my all-girls school had emphasized cursive writing, as I used it to add a romantic touch to my work.

When I finally read his comments and feedback, I was met with admiration and praise. In one of the margins, he had written, “Your insights are so compelling, it’s impossible not to fall in love with your analysis.” On the final page, at the bottom, he had added, “It’s a privilege to be your professor. Your brilliance shines so brightly that it’s clear this paper is a testament to your exceptional talent.”

Often times I worried that there actually was something going on between us, and that his praise and charming were remarks were not that of a proud professor, but of an infatuated man instead. So that day, I decided to address it.

As the lecture drew to a close, I lingered in my seat, carefully packing up my belongings with deliberate slowness. The classroom slowly emptied, the murmur of students’ conversations fading into the background as they made their way out. I wanted to be alone with Mr. Styles, to discuss something that had been weighing on my mind. By the time I made my way down the row of seats to his desk, the room was empty except for the two of us.

“Mr. Styles,” I began hesitantly, catching his eye as he gathered his papers. “I was hoping to ask you something.”

He looked up, a faint smile playing on his lips. “Of course, go ahead. I’m actually glad you stayed behind. There’s something I’d like to ask you as well.”

A sudden rush of anxiety gripped me. The possibility of crossing a line—whether I had done so with my subtle flirtations or if he were about to make a move that could alter our dynamic—was almost too much to bear.

My fantasies of him flashed through my mind. I had dreamt of intimate moments with him like kissing him, waking up in his bed, or better yet, on the couch in his office after a late romantic night together. I had once pictured us sitting on the floor around his small coffee table as we did one time when they ordered takeout during one of our August meetings except this time I would slip my shoes off casually and find a way to stroke my foot, clothed thin leggings, against his leg, looking at him with doe eyes as I dare to not so innocently asks if he ever thought about me sexually.

Hell, I even pictured him going down on me after laying me on his desk and even touched myself to the idea of riding him while he sat on his office chair. I would sneak into the small space between him and his desk and shut off his laptop while he graded my papers, cockily saying “We already know I got an A” – despite my crippling self-doubt without tangible affirmation – as I sit on his lap. In this fantasy he would laugh at my remark and gladly embrace me with a hand on my ass, the other intertwined among thick locks of my long hair, messing it up as I teasingly kiss him, ever so aware of the friction I’m creating between our crotches.

But still, to think that he would propose something to me in that moment, sexual or romantic, casually after class as if I haven’t been pining for two Octobers made me incredibly nervous.

I cleared my throat, trying to steady my voice as I met his gaze. “Mr. Styles, well, first of all this has nothing to do with the actual course itself, maybe a bit but...” I trailed off “It’s... it’s been on my mind for a while.”

He raised an eyebrow, curiosity evident in his expression. “Sure, go ahead. I’m happy to answer anything.” He smiled shyly to comfort me.

I took a deep breath, my heart pounding as I prepared to voice my concerns. “Do you think that maybe my behavior in class, my enthusiasm, or even my approach to your feedback has influenced you to… um… maybe to favor me? Over other students I mean.” I began nervously, desperately searching for an expression on his blank face.

“Maybe sometimes I get a little excited and forget that you are my professor and not my friend or something, I think I may have overstepped my boundaries but… but you treat me as an equal which, by the way, I have always greatly appreciated. I mean, it has offered me an opportunity to grow as a student like no other, but I still worry…”I trailed off, now a stern look evident on his face and possibly even hurt.

He paused for a moment, his gaze thoughtful as he considered my words. “I appreciate your honesty and self-awareness,” he said finally, his voice steady but soft. “It’s clear that you’re passionate and dedicated, and I value that. But it’s important to remember that I strive to maintain fairness in all my interactions with students.”

I bit my lip, feeling a mix of relief and apprehension. “I understand, Mr. Styles. I just want to make sure that if I take pride in these academic accomplishments… if I want to revel in the fact that I always receive praise from you and rarely any criticism – like todays feedback for example, which included no criticism, I want to make sure it is because I am worthy of it. And not because I won you over by involving myself in your extracurriculars or because we are… uh.. friendly.”

He looked at me with a reassuring smile, his gaze steady and sincere. “First of all, let me assure you that you are never inappropriate. The friendship we’ve developed is separate from our academic interactions. Outside of school hours, I call you by your first name to maintain that distinction. In the classroom, I evaluate you purely on your merit.”

He leaned forward slightly, his tone earnest. “The reason your feedback today contained no criticism is that your paper was truly flawless. If there had been any weaknesses or areas for improvement, I would have pointed them out without hesitation. I hold you in very high regard academically, and that respect extends to all aspects of your work. If I ever notice any shortcomings, I will address them so you have the opportunity to refine and grow.”

His expression softened, a touch of concern in his eyes. “The only issue I see here is that you are doubting yourself. Your achievements and the praise you receive are well-deserved. You have a remarkable ability, and I believe in your potential. My only hope is that you start to see in yourself what I see in you – a brilliant, dedicated student who deserves every bit of recognition they receive.”

I nodded, feeling a sense of relief and a renewed confidence. When I looked down at my lap I heard him continue:

“And of course I value the relationship we have fostered outside of class. Would I be the man I am today if you hadn’t introduced me to the wonders of Moroccan cuisine?” He tried to joke to ease the tension and unsurprisingly it worked as it earned him a soft chuckle of honest amusement.

“Theres the y/n I know and love” he bantered though I cant say my heart didn’t skip a beat at the mention of the word “love”.

“You know, there are many other cuisines you’re yet to try,” I said with a playful glint in my eye. “For someone who’s so well-traveled and cultured, it’s surprising how much you’ve missed out on when it comes to food.” I teased.

“Well, perhaps you’ll tell me all about it when we’re in Amsterdam for the debate competition,” he said with a smile, his eyes twinkling with genuine excitement.

I blinked, momentarily stunned. “Wait, what? You secured that for us?” My voice wavered slightly as my heart leaped with joy. “I can’t believe it! I’m so excited. This is incredible news!”

He chuckled, clearly pleased with my reaction. “I thought you’d like that. It’s an excellent opportunity, and I know how much you’ve been looking forward to it.”

I couldn’t help but beam, my excitement bubbling over. “This is amazing, truly. Thank you so much!” I stepped closer, touched by his thoughtfulness and dedication.

As I reached out, our hands brushed briefly, a fleeting touch that sent a shiver through me. His gaze softened, and I could see the sincerity in his eyes. “I’m just glad we get to share this experience together,” he said softly.

The moment felt charged, filled with unspoken words and mutual appreciation. I nodded, my heart full of gratitude and warmth. “Me too,” I murmured, feeling the depth of our connection more than ever before.

Time jump – December is getting ready for Christmas.

As we stepped into the hotel lobby, the excitement was palpable among the debate team. Amsterdam was already charming me, even though I’d only glimpsed it through the bus window. The streets were lined with picturesque canals and quaint buildings, each one more enchanting than the last. I couldn’t help but talk animatedly about how I’d dreamed of visiting the Netherlands ever since my father told me stories about the blooming flower fields when I was a child.

Harry, who had been sitting beside me on the bus, watched with a fond smile. “You really seem to love the city,” he said. “Maybe we could find a couple of free days between the training and the competition to visit the flower fields.”

My eyes widened in delight. “Really? That would be incredible. But managing a whole field trip with the debate team might be a bit complicated.”

He grinned, a glint of mischief in his eyes. “Well, we could go alone. Just you and me. A little escape from the team.” He added. “We could explore some other things too if we’d like.”

The thought of spending time alone with him, wandering through a sea of flowers, made my heart race. I felt a warm blush creep up my cheeks. “That sounds amazing. I’d love that.”

When we checked into the hotel and were given our room keys, Anika, my vice president, and I realized that Harry and I had rooms on a separate floor. In fact, they were deluxe rooms though him and I booked standard rooms for everyone when we went over the budget. Anika seemed particularly perplexed by this.

“Why did you get such a nice room and I didn’t?” Anika questioned, her tone tinged with curiosity as she approached me in the lobby.

I shrugged, trying to sound nonchalant. “Maybe Mr. Styles thought I needed a little extra comfort. You know, as president” I joked, not really sure if that was the case. “Besides, he probably just had to make decisions based on what was available.” I found myself lying, knowing I was curious myself.”

Anika raised an eyebrow. “Or maybe he’s using the budget money to splurge on you. I’ve noticed you two have become quite friendly. Could it be that he has a thing for you?” she teased, knowing I have spent months pining and flirting.

I laughed, shaking my head. “I don’t think so, Anika. We’re friends, and that’s all it is. I don’t think he feels anything else.” I said, confidant of my words for the first time in this conversation. “Plus, you are the only person other than me and Harry that got her own room. Others are sharing and you likely have a king bed all to yourself.”

“Harry? Is that his name now?” she smirked. “I guess you forgot to tell me you are on a first name basis. Are you holding out on me Y/L/N?” she joked though she was never oblivious to the fact that you kept some encounters with Harry to yourself, as if it would fuel the fantasy somehow.

I raised an eyebrow and gave her a playful grin. “Oh, come on. You have to admit everyone in the poetry society calls him that when we are outside the university.” I said, knowing that it was only one guy who was a family friend of Harry’s who got the honor.

She chuckled, but there was a hint of curiosity in her gaze. “Right. But you can’t deny there’s something a bit… special about how you two interact. Just saying.”

I rolled my eyes but couldn’t suppress a smile. “Well, if it makes you feel any better, I’m not holding my breath for anything more on this trip. We’re here for the debate, remember? That’s the focus. But if anything happens later…” I shrugged playfully as she returned my knowing smile.

“Fair enough. Just keep your eyes open anyway, okay? Sometimes things happen when you least expect them to.”

I heard Harry calling my name from the end of the hall. I turned around to see him walking towards me with a thoughtful expression.

“Hey, do you still want to gather the debate team for a brief practice session before the afternoon debate?” he asked, his tone carrying a hint of concern.

I shook my head, smiling. “No, no need. You were right; they need a break. Plus, everyone has their notecards and seems prepared.”

Harry nodded, his smile relaxing into a satisfied grin. “Alright then. Let’s head to the elevator; it’ll be a bit quieter now anyway.”

We walked to the elevator together, and once inside, he pressed the button for my floor. The confined space seemed to amplify the gentle hum of the elevator, making it feel intimate.

Harry glanced at me with a soft smile, his eyes lingering a moment longer than usual. “Your hair looks different today. Did you do something special with it?” he asked, his voice carrying a playful undertone.

I felt a tinge of embarrassment, my cheeks warming slightly. “I just blow-dried it differently since I was in a rush this morning,” I replied, trying to sound casual.

Harry’s smile grew, his eyes twinkling with a mix of admiration and something else I couldn’t quite place. “Well, it looks beautiful. I wouldn’t have guessed it was rushed.”

His compliment made my heart flutter, and I couldn’t help but smile. “Thanks, Harry. That makes me feel a lot better about this hectic morning” I tried to divert the conversation, feeling nervous at his focus on me.

“Yeah, well, at least you have matching socks,” he joked, and before I could ask him what the hell he was talking about, he lifted his foot, revealing his own mismatched socks with a playful grin.

I couldn’t help but laugh. “You and your accidental fashion choices,” I said, shaking my head with a smile, remembering that time I complimented his shoes only to find out he ordered the wrong ones online and couldn’t get them returned. He looked handsome in them anyway, I had told him.

He shrugged, his eyes twinkling with mischief. “What can I say? I like to keep things interesting. And besides, it’s a good thing someone’s got their fashion game on point around here.” He said, brushing off the fact that it was a rushed accident.

I playfully nudged him. “Well, I guess I’ll take that as a compliment. And for the record, I do have matching socks today, just in case you were wondering.”

Harry’s eyes softened as he looked at me, a warmth in his gaze that made my heart flutter. “Well, I must say, your socks are a lot less distracting than mine.”

I chuckled, feeling the tension between us ease into something more comfortable and light-hearted.

As the elevator chimed and the doors slid open to my floor, Harry didn’t make a move to exit. Instead, he turned to me with a charming grin, his eyes sparkling with warmth. “Let me walk you to your room. It’s the least I can do. After all, it’s not every day I get to be a gentleman,” he said, completely ignoring the fact that his room was directly across from the elevator.

I laughed softly, touched by his thoughtfulness. “You’re too kind, Harry. It’s just down the hall here,” I said, gesturing toward my door, which was a short distance away from his.

As we walked together down the hallway, the atmosphere felt lighter, filled with a quiet, pleasant tension. Harry’s presence beside me was comforting, and I found myself appreciating the little things—like how he occasionally glanced my way, as if trying to make the moment last just a bit longer.

When we reached my door, Harry reached out and brushed his hand lightly against mine as he opened the door for me. “Even so, a little extra time with you—well, when else can I talk about my accidental shenanigans and have someone listen intently?” His voice was low and warm, and his gaze lingered on me with an intensity that sent a thrill down my spine.

I felt a flutter in my chest at his words but remained blissfully unaware of the deeper implications behind his gaze. “Well,” I said, smiling as I unlocked the door and stepped inside. “Thanks for walking me. It’s always nice to have a bit of company, especially when the company is as pleasant as yours.”

Harry’s smile grew softer, and he took a step back, still holding my gaze. “Anytime, y/n. I’ll see you in a few hours. Get some rest.

“You too, Harry.” I said as he walked back to his own room.

——————————————————————

PART TWO IS NOW UP 🌷🌷

[arc-misadventures]

Burdens of an Unwanted Legacy

"So, why are you dragging me to the training halls, Raven?

"Because I wanted you to practice on your swordsmanship."

"I'd assume as much, but if you wanted me to do some training, then where is your blade, Raven?"

While, Jaune may be dressed in his exercise clothes, he was still armed with, Crocea Mors upon his hip. And, while, Raven may have also been dressed in simple exercise attire as well, her dreaded blade, Omen was nowhere to be seen.

"Ahh, well you're not going to be practicing with me today. No, we have a special guest here today. So, I thought it would be good if you got some time to practice your blade with someone else."

"Hmmm... that is a viable reasoning."

"Plus her beating you up a bit would be a good way to relieve some tension..."

"And, there it is... typical" Jaune had earned the moniker of, 'Punching Bag' by his fellow students, and teachers on account of his high, Aura reserves. This resulted in him having to fight many of his peers for extended periods of time for several reasons.

Those reasonings being endurance training, to testing the limits of an individuals semblance; This either being the impacts that this semblance would have on an individual, or the extent of possible damages one could expect to impact if ones semblance was allowed to extend to it's maximum capabilities.

While, Jaune could understand the reasoning behind such practices, and even encouraged many aspiring trainee to unleash the full effects of their semblances on him, It did not mean he enjoyed it.

"Haa... Am I testing someone's semblance, or am I really just the punching bag for them today."

"Don't worry, they won't be using their semblance. Just some honest training bouts with a sword to relieve some accumulating stress they've been dealing with lately."

"Stress? I take it that this isn't something that our usual meditation lessons couldn't deal with then?"

As a means to help, Spartans combat the, Grimm; Spartan Trainee's were sent through several rigorous training regimens to strengthen their mental fortitude, and more often learn to control their emotions. Often leading to many, Spartans to be seen as emotionless killing machines by the common folk.

"Uhh... no. It's civilian related." Raven visibly winced as she spoke the word: Civilian. Bar dealing with, Tai, Raven didn't have much patience when it comes to dealing with civilians.

In fact: Most, Spartans didn't like dealing with civilians so much so, that before trainee's became, Spartan's they were placed in new mental fortitude class. A class solely meant to help dealing with civilian antics, and behavior. Honestly, Jaune along with many other, Spartans didn't think that these classes were all that effective. Necessary yes, effective no so much.

"I take it that the punching bag method didn't help them?" The punching bag method was relatively simple stress relief: Get a photo of the civilians face who has been giving you shit, put it on a punching bag, and beat the ever loving shit out of it.

Many civilians found this method to be a totally barbaric practice, and that should be done away with imminently. Something that the high ranking, Spartan officers made fully well know that they fully supported this incentives. However, this was merely lip service that the higher ups gave to the civilian officials who made the complaints about it. Considering, Jaune had seen the faces of those same civilian officials on multiple punching bags before, and that his commanding officers themselves were the ones to ripe them to shreds.

"No. She's been dealing with too much stress because of this particular civilian. It's more likely that she'd turn the civilian into a punching bag at this rate." Raven chuckled nervously as they entered the training hall.

"She? Who is this, Spartan I'll be sparing with then?"

"Well..." Raven pointed her hand outward, and Jaune knew fully well who she was having him spar with today. This lady didn't need to introduce herself, Jaune knew fully well who he was dealing with the second he saw that silver white hair. And, upon seeing her, silver white hair, Jaune gave the only appropriate response anyone could fathomably conceive.

"Ahh... shit."

Among the, Spartans everyone knew who the lady with the hair as white as snow was. She was a rarity among rarities. For she was, Winter Schnee, S Rank, Spartan.

A Spartans overall end rank was determined by an individuals level skill, Aura levels, and the combat applicability of their unique individual semblance in combat scenarios. A circumstance with begged the question; if an individual, Spartan that had truly impressive levels of, Aura, and a truly effective combat applicable semblance. Would there rank stop at, A Class?

This question, and rare existence swiftly lead to the creation of the seventh rank that only a rare, and selected few, Spartans could dream to acquire. Given to those only with both vast aura reserves, and especially powerful semblances.

S Class.

The numbers of, Spartans who had reached the rank of, S Class were enough to be counted on one hand. Because of their rarity they had unprecedented influence both within, and outside the, Spartan Academies.

Influence that many unscrupulous characters from the outside of the, Academies often wished to capitalize on.

"Winter Schnee... Are you trying to get me killed, Raven?!"

"Yes." A smirked rose across her face, as Jaune recoiled in fake shock at the teasing remarks of his friend, and mentor.

"What did I do to deserve this?!" He feigned mock shock at her playful accusation.

"You forced me to reconnect with my past lover!" Raven lean down, and leered down at the young man.

"And, what is wrong with that?"

"Nothing, it's nice to reconnect with him. I'm meeting him, and his wife for dinner this weekend." Raven, straightened her back, and looked away from him, trying to hid the faint blush across her face.

"Oh, Tai got married? I wonder how that came about."

"I don't know, I'll ask them when I see them this weekend, and I'll let you know."

"Thank you. Did you catch her name by any chance?"

"I think her name was... Summer Rose? Yeah, Summer Rose." It took, Raven a moment to catch the name that was caught on the tip of her tongue. But, as she said it, Jaune couldn't help, but raise an inquisitive eyebrow as he heard that name.

"Rose? Hmmm... do you think she has any relation to that gun nut in the armoury?"

Raven's eyes blinked in contemplation as she heard the mention of, Beacon Academy's resident gun nut armourer.

"Hmmm... Maybe... why don't we ask...?"

"Hey!"

The duos musing was interrupted as they saw the, S Class Spartan, Winter Schnee walk towards them.

"Hey, Raven."

"Winter..." The duo clasped their hands together in a greeting before breaking apart. "Sorry, I didn't call out to you sooner; my friend, and i were lost in our own discussion."

"That is alright. So, is this my sparring partner?" Winter turned to face, Jaune. She gave him the once over, no doubt evaluating him. Jaune gazed at her in turn, evaluating her in the process.

Jaune knew full well how effective of a warrior every, S Class Spartan was. He knew full, and well how effective of a warrior, Winter Schnee was. He knew fully well, and good that if they fought in a duel with, and Winter was using her semblance, she would wipe the floor with him. Without her semblance though, he'd give himself a thirty five out of a hundred to win.

"B Class Spartan, Jaune Arc, Sir!" Jaune threw up a salute to the woman out of respect, she quickly returned the salute in kind.

"B Class? You look rather young for a, B Class."

"I have higher then average levels of, Aura. Because of that, they made me a, B Class when I graduated." Jaune had been asked this question many times before, his ranking often made sense to his fellow, Spartans. But, his experience's when it came to his rank, and aura levels when it came to dealing with civilians was often unpleasant.

"Ahh, I had a similar experience; I was promoted to A Class when I graduated because of my semblance's capabilities."

"A Class? Seems a bit too fast to graduate from a trainee to an, A Class Spartan in my opinion." Winter nodded her head as she agreed with his statement before she continued her story.

"I agree, but due to my semblances unique abilities, and some... backroom politics I was promoted to, A Class. However, I never acted like I was an, A Class until I had a few more years of experience under my belt."

"I understand that, I'm still acting like I'm a, C Class myself. I've only been a, B Class for little over a year now. I still don't feel like one yet. Now then, enough small talk; You asked for a duel with the 'Punching Bag.' Shall we begin?"

"The punching bag? I thought you said I would be fighting a person, Raven, not an actual punching bag." Winter looked at, Raven, her brow furrowed in disappointment. Raven shook her head, as she waved the idea away.

"No no no. 'The Punching Bag,' not a punching bag."

"Hmm?"

"Jaune's, Aura is so vast that he is often used to help trainee's test the limits of their individuals semblance's. Because of this he earned the moniker of, 'The Punching Bag' around, Beacon Academy."

"Oh... my condolences." Jaune took, Winter's words in, and just waved them off.

"Think nothing of it. Considering the effects of many trainee's semblances, it is better if they could test their semblance in an controlled environment against an individual who can withstand their attacks."

"Hmmm..." Winter cupped her chin in thought as she registered his words. "That is sound logic. I could have used someone like that whilst I was training with my semblance."

"Hey, just because I think it's a good idea to train with people to help control their semblance's doesn't mean I like it!"

"Oh? But, it sounds so fun to toss you around with my semblance." Winter gave, Jaune challenging smirk that caused him to growl at her in turn.

"So you want to play then? Okay then..." Jaune walk out into the middle of the training hall, and pulled out his sword, and shield. He pointed his blade at her as he issued his challenge to her, that she was all too willing to reciprocate in kind. "Care to dance miss?"

"With pleasure~!"

[mell0wjello]

Hiya! Sorry, this is my first time requesting something, so sorry if it's not right or anything! ':)

BUT! I saw that your requests were open, and I like your vibe, soooo I have a request, of how the Octatrio (separately, together, whatever floats your boat!) would react to an s/o who's asexual :0

WAHHH TYSMM ! I was actually already thinking about an ace s/o with Floyd so this is perfect <3

~~~~~~

𝓐𝔃𝓾𝓵 𝓐𝓼𝓱𝓮𝓷𝓰𝓻𝓸𝓽𝓽𝓸

Throughout the school year, Azul and you had grown quite close. What started out as a healthy competition between two hard-working students developed into a genuine friendship somewhere down the line. You developed a strong trust bond with each other, becoming the first person either of you went to for help first.

Azul noticed that today you were especially fidgety and nervous. You were picking at your nails and your eyes darted from place to place. Of course, he worried for you. He asked you to see him after school at his office in Mostro Lounge just to make sure you were ok.

The afternoon rolled by, and you came into his familiar workspace, still visibly off. You took a seat in one of the chairs, averting his gaze knowing damn well that he was seeing right through you.

Azul leaned forward and spoke in a concerned tone,

"Prefect, I can tell that something's wrong. You are clearly not feeling well. There's no point in hiding it from me, so why not just tell me?"

You sighed at the truth of his words. You looked up at the pure worry welled up in his eyes. Maybe it was for the best.

Slowly, you began

"Well... I'm worried about what others would think about me."

Azul raised his eyebrow.

"Others? It's quite unlike you to think that way. Did something happen?" Azul questioned

"The thing is... I think I'm Asexual." You said quietly

"I'm just worried about what others would think about me if they learned that. I already stand out so much because of my background, and to come out like that..."

You sighed into your hands

"I mean, will people accept me, or will they change their attitude towards me? I don't know..."

You felt Azul's hand on your shoulder, offering a comforting squeeze. You looked up from your own to see he was now kneeling at eye level in front of you.

"Prefect, there's no shame in being that way." Azul spoke soothingly

"Nothing about who you are and were as a person has changed. You're still NRC's prefect. People should treat you the same way they always have."

You smiled at his comforting words. Your reaction encouraged Azul to continue

"To me, Prefect, whether you are a merman, human, or fae, you are still my closest friend. Through thick and thin, it's still you. Nothing will change that."

You leaned in to give Azul a hug. Azul quietly gasped in surprise. This was a first. But nonetheless, he put his arms on your back as well.

"Thank you so much Azul" You smiled into the hug.

"Of course, Prefect"

~~~~~~

𝓙𝓪𝓭𝓮 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓕𝓵𝓸𝔂𝓭 𝓛𝓮𝓮𝓬𝓱

Ever since attending your first class, the tweels have been stuck on you like a tattoo. Everywhere the prefect went, the tweels were sure to follow. And soon enough, the prefect was there anywhere the tweels went too.

The three of you sit around each other in class. Floyd would hardly pay attention, but at least you and Jade were somewhat more responsible than him.

As you arrived at Trein's classroom you set your backpack on the table, the tweels noticing something they hadn't before

Among others, their attention turned towards a purple and monochromatic pin on the front. Floyd tapped your shoulder, but your attention was still on the classwork you had been assigned. Floyd raised two fingers at your head and flicked them, successfully getting you to cock your head towards him.

"What's this flag on your backpack, Shrimpy? Does it mean something?"

Jade, who observed the entire thing go down, chimed in,

"I was asking myself the same thing. I believe I've seen it somewhere before."

Your face softened at the question and you replied to the curious eels,

"Oh, yeah. It's the Asexual flag. I'm Ace."

Jade nodded, remembering where else he'd seen the distinct colors. Floyd, however, was a little confused. He thought for a moment before his eyes widened.

"Ohhhhh. So, you're like a Starfish!" He said in amusement.

You snorted at and Jade chuckled at Floyd's comparison.

"Not quite, Floyd. But I suppose that isn't too far off." Jade murmured.

"Hmm. Should I call you Starfish instead of Shrimpy then?" Floyd asked you

He didn't wait for your response before humming,

"Yup! You're gonna be Starfish now"

~~~~~~

[selfaware-bungou-stray-dogs]

Hello, I really enjoy your bungo self aware series. It has really helped me cope with everything. I was not sure where to put it and I was afraid to request. Because I sent one in your messages. About the port mafia flags taking care of the reader that experiences painful flashbacks from ptsd. To the point where it's hard for them to function with basic things. And goes into their head that they could've done this or that to prevent further harm and scrutiny.

Few words

Self-Aware! Platonic! Flags x Fem! Teen! Reader

Description: Few words made your mind wonder. Flags are here to make sure, that you are fine.

Warning: English is my second language. Mentions of abuse and scumming.

_______

You have been feeling groggy since morning. While, you don't have nightmares that night, the dream you had was unpleasant. It worsens your mood quite a bit. You tried to keep a smile on your face, but others quickly saw through your efforts.

The moment you sat down at the dinner table, Chuuya put a plate with double portion of a breakfast, Albatross was telling jokes, while driving you and BSD Teens and Kids at school, and during lunch break, Teruko was telling stories about Hunting Dogs missions, that you liked so much.

You could swear, that you started feeling better. You were sure, that at the evening you won't feel the shroud of morning sadness.

Well, as Fyodor liked to say "Не говори гоп, пока не перепрыгнешь"(1)

_______________

Today you supposed to go home early. Your class won a competition, and, as reward, you got a short day. Just few minutes before you can go home. Just last few encouraging words from your teacher.

"I never doubted you. After all, students from our school supposed to be perfect!" smile on their face was genuine. They believed, in what they were saying.

"Enjoy your weekends, kids! And, don't tell anyone, that I let you go earlier. It will be our little secret."

Your classmates started to pack their bags. You, on the other hand, froze.

'supposed to be perfect' 'don't tell anyone' 'little secret'

...this word...

"[Y/N], are you okay?" Karma looked concerned. "You have been staring before you, hardly blinking."

You nodded, and quickly put textbooks in your bag.

"We... we should go."

You mumble. You want to go home. You need to focus on going home. On today.

You, Karma and the rest of your housemates/friends/siblings leave the school.

You, Karma and the rest of your housemates/friends/siblings get into the van, saying 'hello' to Albatross, who was driving today.

You tried to focus on current moment.

But 'supposed to be perfect' and 'don't tell anyone' echoed in your head.

And you were silent all the way home.

______________________

Albatross can't help, but sneaking glances at you in the back view mirror.

You were quiet. Your gaze was dull. You looked tense. You looked much worse, than you looked in the morning.

And Albatross knew, what was going on with you.

He and others should prepare.

He managed to send a message to the rest of the Flags, when van got in a small traffic jam.

Today you will need them.

And you will need to be reminded, that you are safe.

And that you are loved.

He and the rest of BSD Cast loved you. You were their daughter/granddaughter/niece/sister.

He and the rest of BSD Cast were neutral about other people.

He and the rest of BSD Cast despised that creatures, that did that to you.

______________________

When you came home, you ignored others and immediately get into your room. You wanted to lay down, to spend some time alone.

Until that annoying echoes of 'supposed to be perfect' and 'don't tell anyone' stop ringing in your ears.

Meanwhile, Flags was preparing. They brought everything they need and were waiting outside your room.

They value your privacy. Sometimes, you need just some solitude and silence.

But they can't let you be always alone. When you were like this, you tend to ignore yourself. Skipped breakfast, lunches, do half job in brushing your hair or teeth. You need people, who took care of you and supports you.

Doing the job, that they failed to do. Who willingly choose to abandon their work.

And, while you have your doubts, you were s strong person. Flags knew that.

But, even strongest people need help. Need love. Need cheering up.

But, for now, they will wait.

____________

You didn't get any sleep.

Your head hurts.

Your hair was a mess.

You slowly stand up from the bed. On stiff legs, you approached your dressing table. You plopped on the chair before it.

You grab hairbrush.

And looked in a mirror.

Messed up hair. Bags under eyes.

And yells of 'You were supposed to be perfect! Why can't you be a normal child?! Why are you so terrible?! Useless! Helpless!'

Your grip on the hairbrush was too strong, your knuckles became white.

sounds of hits rang in your ears

'You were supposed to braid your hair! It is not a braid!'

your scalp was on fire. with every tug of your hair, pain became stronger and stronger. they don't care, that you didn't know, how to do it. you were supposed to be perfect. perfection supped to knew everything without people teaching them 'how'. perfection supposed to know better and not believe scammers. only perfect thing you can do was staying silent and not telling anyone about your home life. or you would face consequences.

You sobbed. And that sob let you return to reality.

You felt, that you weren't alone in the room.

But you can't focus on that someone.

You felt, like you were surrounded by a thick, hard as stone darkness. You tried to focus on something else. On a carpet under your feet, on a chair you were sitting on, on the air, that was surrounding you. On anything, that will freeze you, let you stay there, and not let your mind flow further down the memory river.

Yet, you can't focus on anything. It was hard. Extremely hard. But you tried again and again.

Something warm touched your hands, making you let go of the brush. Warm hands gave your palms another soft squeeze. After this soft gesture, the darkness moved back. Someone started making circling motions with his thumb, giving your hands a little massage. With every circle, darkness creeps away from you.

You finally could focus on the person, who was holding your hands. The sight of the familiar warm smile on Lippmann's face makes darkness moved back again.

"There, Dear, everything is fine. You are safe." Lippmann's voice was soft and warm. "Nothing bad will happen to you."

You continue staring at your hands, while Lippmann squeezed them again.

"You are safe. No one will ever hurt you." His words make you felt like you were covered with a warm blanket. Another pair of hands was put on the top of your head, and fingers started to go through your hair, untangling knots. Pianoman whispered, while gently untangling the knots.

"Let us take care of you, dear. Don't worry about anything, young lady."

You stay silent. You don't know what to say.

You saw Doc with the corner of your eye. He was pouring water from the bottle in a cup.

Soon, he stands next to Lippmann, holding a cup towards you. There was a straw in the cup.

"Here, drink this, [Y/N]" Doc's eyes were warm and full of concern.

You started to drink through the straw

Lippmann's hands were still squeezing yours.

Pianoman, who picked up the hairbrush from the floor, was now brushing your hair.

Doc was still holding the cup with one hand. He put a second hand on your shoulder.

"Here. Here. Don't rush. Small sips. Good. You are doing great. Now, breath in. Hold it. Breathe out. In. Hold it. Out. In. Hold. Out. You are doing great. You are doing great."

Water was drunken. Your breathing calmed down. You felt empty, but, at least, nothing was howling in your head and darkness wasn't circling around you.

The door of the ensuite bathroom opened. Iceman and Albatross stepped into the room.

"Bath is ready, [Y/N]. Do you want to take it now?"

You slowly nodded. Iceman asked the next question.

"Need help?" You shook your head. You were sure, that you can take a bath on your own.

Flags quickly left the room, giving you privacy. You took a change of clothes and went to the bathroom.

___________

Scented oils in the warm water, bubbles, a cup of your favorite beverage did a good job in making tension go away. You just focused on the scent and warmth, not thinking about anything.

After you finished with your bath, you put on your pajamas, a fluffy bathrobe, that Albatross put there earlier, put a towel over your wet hair, and return to your room.

__________

Flags wasn't done with taking care of you yet.

You were sitting on Iceman's lap with your legs in a big bowl full of warm water. Doc was kneeling before you, giving you a foot massage.

Lippmann and Pianoman were sitting on the floor, on the left from Doc, while Albatross was sitting on his right.

The room was silent. Until Albatross spoke.

"Hey, [Y/N], want to hear about the dream I had?" He waited until you nodded, and continue. "Let me tell you, I had a crazy dream last night! I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda!"

Albatross sighed, before grinning.

"Do bad, that it was just a Fanta sea."

You quietly huffed. You don't know if it was a good pun, or so bad it's good pun. Albatross continues.

"Also, earlier today, some aquatic mammals at the zoo escaped! It was otter chaos!"

You giggled. A small smile appeared on your face. Albatross, encouraged, continue telling you puns.

At the end, you and Albatross were laughing. When you two calmed down, you felt courage, that you need to speak.

"I... I am sorry for being a mess today. I am sorry for making you took care of me. I just... I just want someone to care..." You bit your lip. "If only I spoke sooner... You won't get such a mess that I am. I won't be a burden."

You didn't have a chance to react, before you got in a middle of a group hug.

"Don't apologize. You didn't do anything wrong. You are our dear niece. You are our family. You aren't a burden." Pianoman carefully pat your head.

"Don't be ashamed of your emotions. They are valid. You deserve to be heard. You deserve to be loved." Doc squeeze your right shoulder.

"Came to us even with the smallest things to ask for. We will take care of you." Albatross squeezed your right hand.

"We will move forward together. We will take as many small steps as you need and want. You won't be alone. You will never be on your own." Lippmann squeezed your left shoulder.

"You have power. You can choose. We will support you." Iceman carefully squeezed your left hand.

"We love you, our dear niece."

_______

You went to sleep with happy tears on your cheeks. You asked, and they listened. Flags stayed in your room. To make sure, that you don't have nightmares.

No matter what awaits their family, Flags were sure in one thing.

________

All of them will be here for you.

(1)Rus. Idiom. Similar meaning to "don't halloo till you are out of the woods"

(2) Puns were found there

[twst-rose-prisms]

Twst boys and their respective Vocaloid songs

Part 2 of this post!

Characters: All NRC students Warning: Some of these songs contain angsty/dark themes or imply self-harm, however it's nothing too much as that's the nature of Vocaloid songs in general and I recommend you checking them out if you guys can!

Part 1 | Part 2

🕌 Scarabia 🕌

Kalim: Tondemo-Wonderz

This song is full of fun, excitement and upbeat, colorful beats that make you want to smile and dance along, just like the ball of sunshine Kalim he is! The song talks about embracing the unknown and excitement the world offers to us while also having fun, encouraging us to have faith in the wondrous possibilities, while also embracing the failure and mistakes with laughter and positivity. I’d say it’s a perfect song for Kalim, from the vibe to the lyrics!

“Even in this sort of era, We still believe in "wonders," no, no, no? Know! The adult's sharp, money-making memories Make us worry too much! I'm gonna go cross-eyed!” "Why?!" "Do it like this!!" I love everything! That's fine, isn’t it? In this plot to make everyone laugh I can call them rival monsters, right?! We live in a wild, awesome world.” “I reckon it's fine to have troubles you can't do a thing about! I make a pose like I'm gonna save everyone. How about this smile, it's not gonna crumble at all! Even if I fall 100 times, I'm like a phoenix. I won't get upset! Wan wan, too quick, three four! Everybody, showtime!” “Come on professor! This exam is so tough! Agh! Alright, done? Is it final? If I don't get 0 points, it's OK! Let's rain a shower of arrows on those true and false questions! Right and wrong answers are important memories." "There are days when I fail too. You still deny "wonders", no, no, no? Know! Before I'm taken to pieces, listen, wait! This slanted society is too on edge. Charge in, leap in, one more time! Are you ready?!”

-----------------------------------

Jamil: Ghost City Tokyo

Like a ghost who is almost invisible to other’s eyes, Jamil used to do the same too, he always makes sure everything he does is at an average level so nobody will notice him. That’s why I picked this song for him, also because of the lyrics - he’s used to losing, to not be able to shine and stand out for the sake of others, and it’s not something he dreamt of at all. Also I think the city here can be interpreted as Scarabia too, because he still wants to be here despite everything that happened in Book 4.

“The lights of the brilliant shining city Shine down on me in stark contrast They mix with the neon colours changing and escaping from the spaces between those buildings" "I trade my time and this world And sink into the night” “It’s fine, someday it will all be fine How many days I’ve thought so, that have piled up on each other But even today, the me who fades into the Tokyo scenery all alone Seems like a ghost” “Even as I grow used to losing These important feelings that I haven't lost - When I held them close to myself, my tears fell suddenly Because I think I still want to Keep living in this city”

-----------------------------------

👑 Pomefiore 👑

Vil: Cinema

This song is pretty self-explanatory with the lyrics, it’s like someone views their life as a movie, their story is like an unchanged script, yet they’re being satisfied with everything - they want to be the leading star, the protagonist of the movie. Being someone who always has to play the villain role, I picked this song for Vil because it just fits him so much with his backstory and his goal as a whole!

“A delusion of dawn Invaluable escapades and A misunderstood hero play-pretend Traffic's already jammed up now- Oh well, nothing I can do about that anyway” “No, it can't be this, not this. This is a bad fit for me I'm not suited for it- Should I quit it now, or— But that's not right, right! I wonder, when will I get to be The leading star of this show?” “We're not here yet, yet. This can't be the end, so If you're not suited for the role Then just rewrite the script! Look, for the most part, I'm sure it'll always just be me The leading star will only be me!” “The future I wanted to change has come. Whatever you like, however you like it, This is it. I made it here, all the way from the bottom. Just like a movie, this is my story.”

-----------------------------------

Epel: Telecaster B-boy

A song talking about the struggle of growing up, trying to find one’s place in this vast world, the singer desires to be loved and appreciated but always gets misunderstood and underappreciated and also frustrated with society,  just like Epel himself. He hates being the stereotype, cliche thing. If you know his story and goal then this song is very fitting for him! Also the funky, youthful but somewhat fast beat and lyrics fit him very well too!

“The more I grow up DeDeDe The less I fit in, a vacant temple. The girl the life philosopher spoke to Turns into a bird … With just lip service PaPaPa I'll tie up my raggedy shoes … The boy whom a believer in digitization cursed Turns into wind …” “No matter how you look at it DeDeDe It's a stereo bias, sadistic The girl who sang like she was stung by a bee Turns into a flower... Even if you cover your ears PaPaPa Those guys' voices become loud The boy who got these words stabbed in his chest Turns back…” “In this world where I can't Even breathe for a bit Declaring a goodbye to reality Won't you just forgive us? We, the weak ones Let's meet up again somewhere”

-----------------------------------

Rook: Liar Dance

Rook is a bit hard to find, but in my opinion this is the best song for him. It talks about a couple who both hide and lie to each other. But it also means that the singer’s POV is them knowing they’re a liar, a criminal just like other people. Rook himself is not an exception, he also lies and hides many things away even to his friends or someone like Vil. Also I think the lyrics fit him really well, with constant mention of love and lies many times throughout.

''Stolen? Just whatever do you mean?'' Feigning ignorance today as well Having made a vow, to you and you alone Declaring this loveless love of mine in front of you" "Stolen? Just whatever do you mean?" Committing myself to this performance, set lines and all Those memories we've desperately created and clung to, they blend together and feelings between us intensify” “Dance away liar This love has swelled up like a balloon let's turn it into a lie with the prick of a needle On the count of "I-love-you" “Dance away, liar It's too late to apologize We're already partners in this crime called "love" Who cares if there's no going back?”

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💀 Ignihyde 💀

Idia: All I Need are Things I Like

While there could be many other songs that fit Idia, I decided to pick this one because of the lyrics and overall meaning. The song talks about indulging solely into one’s interests and favorite thing everyday, almost every time without paying much attention to reality much at all. Even though the singer sounds happy and satisfied, they also sound lonely, deprived of energy and strength and also longing for actual companionship instead of coping up to the things that they like. It sounds like Idia himself after what happened to him and also his backstory!

"I don’t like weekdays, I like the weekend I don’t like work, I like going back to sleep It’s impossible to live on slacking like this My consciousness recedes" "I don’t like vegetables, I like hamburgers I don’t like barley tea, I like juice Don’t be sweet on me, but I like sweet tasting things My lifetime’s first page" "Only looking at things I like gradually my eyesight gets worse Only being filled with things I like gradually my mind gets duller" "I don’t like living things, I like machines I don’t like the real world, I like the virtual Your tastes were always biased deteriorating and ceasing to think" "Surrounded by the things I like I’ve become unforgiving to the things I don’t like Living only with the things I like I'm resented by someone, somewhere"

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Ortho: Near

This song is gentle, yet emotional and bittersweet, its meaning also fits Ortho and Idia + their relationship a lot if you take it into their backstory context too. At first, Ortho is just a robot that only acts according to how he was programmed but gradually, he starts acting outside his intended programming and learns his own sentience and emotions - just like the robot girl as the song progresses. Overall, I think this fits him a lot!

“Hey, Near. If I don't make fun of someone And if I won't be able to forgive myself How do you feel about This horrible person?" "Hey, Near. Watching other's strides Stepping out without a purpose How do you feel about this Dull person? Hey Near” “Hey, Near. I think living every day with a smile Is something natural How do you feel about This arrogant person?" "Things that do not take any form and cannot be predicted Will interfere with the calculation process" Even so" "Ah, I'll still continue to believe And ask you who doesn't have a heart Because your hand was So much warmer than mine”

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🐉 Diasomnia 🐉

Malleus: Hare wo Matsu

I feel like this song fits Malleus the most with how the lyrics constantly talk about one’s loneliness and about past’s memories. For Malleus, his biggest fear perhaps is his dearest, most cherished people leave his life, like Lilia - his guardian that raises him up ever since he’s still a little lizard or maybe even MC - his ever first friend that treats him so dearly despite his status or his fearful magic power unlike others who is afraid of him. Even the beat is also beautiful but sad, full of longing for your loved one when they leave - just like Malleus himself.

"I'm not getting tired of this morning, One that I've waited for. Very faintly, I'm laughing while appearing to be sorrowful, And wishing to completely forget you." "Because there's no end to this curse Of sleeplessness and the painful past. I'm singing a song in the morning glow, If only I could completely forget, it would end." "There's just one thing I can't yield, And still, without knowing the reason, I live, even now..." "Since I don't have a dream I want to protect, These are days with no answer, But that isn't kindness, isn't it?" "Look, since absolutely nothing hurts, It's alright," I say. Someday, when you'll be gone, ah~ Will I be living alone?”

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Lilia: Kanade Tomosu Sora 

I feel like this song fits Lilia the most in terms of the vibe, the lyrics that matched well with his backstory. This song, while sad, full of longing and reminiscent from the past yet it’s like a glimmer of hope somewhere in the deep, dark sea of sad memories. Lilia was the same too despite how we see him acting outwardly. He gives love to others, but he also needs love and hope. He went through events that could crush him easily and yet, he still stayed strong - for a whole 200+ years, for the sake of others. (I recommend checking out the 25ji, Night Code de version too!)

“Every time I trace back my memories, I feel as if I’m going to be crushed, yet Since I have no place to take refuge,  I just keep questioning myself over and over. Ah…” “There are too many things in my way,  It’s as if there are only things I can’t see Is it alright if I try touching it a little? I want to say it. Even though it might surely be impossible, I want to somehow. Hey, more; hey, more; I want to see more” “So I can turn the images I’ve found of your world still unknown to me Into song" "Blaming myself all this time,  I simply live and breathe but only just barely I’ve always shut it away in a cage I’m not asking for a plain, simple story. I simply wish to hear your voice” “It still hurts. Words keep tightening the cord round my neck, but... These eyes of mine I closed so gently as well, still hurt a little, but… I want to say it. Even though now, I still don’t know when it’ll be but someday for sure. Hey, more; hey, more; I want to see more”

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Silver: Ice Drop

I think this song fits Silver a lot mostly because of the lyrics, and the deep sea could symbolize the dreams that he dives into in Book 7. Although it’s upbeat, the lyrics are full of longing and reminiscing of the past and also his father, but eventually move on and “grow up” from it.  Not to mention, you could even take it as a SilverMC song if you think about that aspect! But even if it's not in a romantic sense, it's still a song talking about how much the past affects us and how we long for our loved one even if it's just a memory, that's why to me this song is really for Silver!

“Even the memories of the past are merely a thousand-year tale I take a deep breath as I fall into the deep sea” “Uh- that voice of yours drenches my whole heart Tangled up and captivated by each other, we sing our unchanging love once more You, not letting go of your hands become a rule of mine It's a heart that will melt away the rusted last page That one and only magic will turn this world around” “I’ll be waiting. Inside my dream, I reach out my hand” “Uh- On this planet, I fell in love without sleeping I longed for you and hesitated what to do, but from now on, I'll grow up You, If it’s with you, I’ll dive in without hesitation”

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Sebek: Kashika

Sebek was the hardest to find for me in the entire list mainly because while he has his own character, he doesn’t have too much depth but I tried my best and I think this song fits him the most! This song is powerful, full of willpower and hope towards tomorrow despite the hard, tough times. The song encourages us to keep living, even in the most uncertain moments, you need to cherish each moment of your life as well your living heartbeat, which represents the tenacity and perseverance of life. I feel like the energy as well the meaning of the song fits Sebek a lot overall for his character - with the desire to rise, stand up and protect he always have.

“When my quivering voice breathed life into a song, It was then I realized, That was the first time my breath could be seen. They say that in the end, the value of music is subjective– Well then, I'll sing as I please, I'll show you the message I want to convey. I won't despair over Or be afraid of my mistakes. They say to "live the right way," But I want to fight against that. My whole life has consisted of "it's my fault." Even if I'm treated like a fool, I'll be hurt and I'll hurt others, I'll live, causing both kindness and injury. The present I see is everything to me, So I don't want to cling onto ideals of the past or the future. Beat, beat, o heart of mine! It might be unsteady, but even so, this is my pulse.”

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[kira-fluff]

𝖑𝖊𝖆𝖗𝖓𝖎𝖓𝖌 𝖙𝖔 𝖑𝖔𝖛𝖊 || 𝖙𝖆𝖎𝖏𝖚 𝖘𝖍𝖎𝖇𝖆

pairing: single!dad!taiju shiba x fem!teacher!reader tw: suggestive (fluff to smut), shower sex, taiju being a service dom, adhd!child (cuz taiju has adhd change my mind), language, references to tokyo rev [spoilers] about taiju's back story and arc, mentions of therapy because no one talks about taiju's redemption for some reason, dead spouse, guilt, mentions of god bc taiju is canonically very religious, virgin!reader, handjob/bj a/n: so fun fact i'm an education major lmfao and i love taiju so much this was a shameless word vomit because i love my major and taiju aight - yes i changed the formatting again sorry lol also omggg we're almost to 2k followers i can't believe it!

every classroom has at least one student that you liked to call "the student you loved the most". this student was typically the student with the most behavioral issues in your classroom. this term, "the student you loved the most" wasn't sarcastic - you recognized that these students were often really the ones who needed the most love.

one of the most important things you learned while running your kindergarten classroom was that the behaviors you saw in the classroom did not reflect the child's character, but rather, their poor coping skills with something going on in their life.

the same could be said about one of your students - koji shiba. he was truly such a bright child, yet not only did he struggle with attention deficit disorder, but he frequently disrupted recess with physical fights with other boys his age. you frequently wrestled with how to handle his struggles. on one hand, you understood that these outbursts stemmed from his adhd... but you were almost certain there was something else that you weren't seeing. however, your meeting with his parents was arriving quickly.

koji sat next to you at recess, a bruised elbow and a bleeding knee (all patched up now, thankfully, because you started bringing a first aid kit to recess). he was scowling, looking down at the ground with his arms crossed.

you kneeled down to look at him at the same level, "koji, could you tell me what happened?"

"he was lookin' at me like i was stupid."

you eyed him for a moment before showing concern, "koji, do you remember what i said we should do when we are having big emotions?"

he avoided your gaze, turning his head away from you as he replied, "nuh-uh."

you gave a patient smile, "when we have big emotions, we don't have to handle them all by ourselves. do you know why?"

he shook his head.

you continued, "because otherwise, those big emotions get bigger and bigger until we can't handle them anymore because they're so heavy!"

he looked pensive for a moment before saying, "'m sorry i punched him. i didn't mean it."

"i know you didn't, your big emotions just got a little too heavy. but who do you think you should be apologizing to right now?"

he lowered his head, pointing toward the boy who was running around the playground with a big bandage on his cheek. with an encouraging nod from you, he slid off the bench, making his way over to the boy. you watched from afar to ensure that both boys were safe, smiling as you saw koji sheepishly apologize to the boy with his head down, scuffing the sand with his foot. from what you could read from the other boy's body language, he seemed like he didn't mind too much, offering a smile and shrug and even inviting koji to play.

sometime later that day, koji came up to you with a big grin on his face. tapping your arm gently, you turned to him as he said, "miss y/l/n, you're my favorite teacher. i like you."

you held back a laugh at his cuteness (and the fact that you're the only teacher he's ever had). "thank you koji, that means a lot." you ruffled his hair, "i'm so excited to tell your parents what good choices you made today!"

"oh, it's just me and dad."

your eyes widened and you quickly searched his eyes for any signs of sadness or uncomfortability. however, he seemed rather relaxed and even unbothered, though you supposed sometimes kids weren't able to fully process things like that at this age.

you decided to reply in kind, "what's dad like? is he as cool as you?"

you beamed as his eyes lit up, "oh yeah! dad is super cool! maybe even cooler than me! he used to beat up tons of guys.. but he says i better not because that's not nice. dad was in a gang when he was younger so he could beat up all the other kids' dads if they try to mess with me!" he replied proudly, puffing out his chest.

you laughed outright at that, "he does sound pretty cool."

"yeah, and he's single!"

you nearly choked on your own spit. this parent-teacher conference was going to be interesting, you knew that for sure. a former gang member? you couldn't help your mind wander to what he looked like, imaging tattoos, piercings, and the like.

[taiju's pov]

koji had been going on and on about his teacher since the first day of school. it was a different story every day but usually included the same statements: "she's so pretty!", "she's so nice", "she lets me play with my pencil during lessons to help me listen", "she didn't yell at me when i wasn't paying attention" - all things considered, she sounded like a great teacher. which was good because, well, for most of koji's life he didn't have a mother figure. his aunt who would've been present otherwise was currently in college (as she should be!) and wasn't near our home. but, i think koji felt an absence without his mother, even if he never said anything or didn't even realize it.

it wasn't long after koji was born that we lost her to a car accident on her way to her first day back at work from maternity leave. there wasn't any use in blamin' myself for it anymore and god knows how much fuckin' money i've spent on therapy just trying to fix myself even before all that shit happened.

i swore after the way that i treated hakkai and yuzuha that i'd fix myself and never do that to my family ever again. i struggled for years with unbearable self-hatred at the way i'd treated them. even then, it's a struggle i have to bear because at the end of the day, my therapist says i gotta be kind to myself, too, or some bullshit like that. that i "had a lot on my back as the oldest" and that i "didn't learn good copin' mechanisms". wasn't diagnosed with adhd and a trauma disorder until i was fuckin' 30. still, to me it sounded all like excuses.. still does if i'm honest.

she was the one who taught me to see past myself - past my past self and instead look toward livin' in the present. my late wife was the one who brought me back from the hell i was livin' in day in and day out, and i'll never forget her for that.

my thoughts were interrupted by my son.

"dad, why are we goin' back to school during nighttime?"

"'s time for the meetin' between your teacher and me," i smiled, turning toward koji who started skipping excitedly.

i've met his teacher once before, but only for a moment as introductions were done at the beginning of the year to make sure koji got his school supplies. embarrassingly, though, i could barely remember what she looked like.

"you're mr. shiba, right? sorry, i'm still trying to connect all of the names to faces," you smiled, bowing to greet koji's father.

"big" was an understatement. this man was massive. you mustn't have realized it last time because you were speaking to a whole crowd of parents from the front of the classroom while they were all sitting, but holy shit, this guy is enormous. similar to your image of a gang member, mr. shiba sported tattoos along his neck that likely trailed down to his chest from what you could see from his suit. no piercings though, contrary to your imagery, however. he must be at least 6'4 from what you could see and incredibly muscular.

realizing you were staring, you cleared your throat awkwardly and motioned for him to take a seat as you took yours, toji following suit as well. your cheeks flushed as you noticed a hint of a smirk on his face as he took his seat.

you folded your hands on top of your desk. "first of all, i wanted to just say that koji is an incredibly intelligent and gifted young man." you smiled toward koji, "but we're still working on making the right choice, however, when we have really big feelings."

mr. shiba raised an eyebrow, "so, he's been actin' up?" he turned toward his son with an expression that clearly said "we'll talk about this later", to which koji shrunk in his chair.

you leaned in closer, raising your voice a little, "i-i want to clarify that after koji and i talk after he makes a mistake, he tries his very best to fix it and make the right choice, mr. shiba."

"you can call me taiju. i've heard about some of the hittin' stuff from the principal, but is there more?"

"sometimes he struggles with paying attention in class, but this is something we are working on as a team, as you know. he is able to do mathematics at least two grade levels above his peers, so i think as long as we continue to practice redirection techniques he'll continue to succeed."

the conversation continued on longer than you anticipated, and you were grateful then that taiju and koji were your last meeting of the day. the conversation went from speaking of koji's behavior and overall developmental and academic success to things of a more casual nature. taiju, you found, was incredibly sweet. he had a way of getting you to laugh when you least expected it. koji got bored pretty early on in the conversation and began to color at his desk instead. taiju showed a great amount of courtesy, smiling softly while you talked and nodding along as you spoke.

in a moment of silence in your conversation, you looked at the clock and realized that it was already seven o'clock.

"oh, i guess it's getting rather late. thank you so much for meeting with me mr. shi-- taiju," you laughed, "and i look forward to seeing how koji grows this year!"

"pleasures all ours, right koji?" the little boy nodded enthusiastically as taiju moved him toward the classroom exit door. just as he was about to move through the threshold, he turned around once more.

"...have ya eaten yet?"

you looked up from your notes, startled, "dinner? ah, i had a late lunch..."

he eyed you for a moment, "... do ya wanna get dinner? ...with koji and i? on me, of course."

"oh, i couldn't impose on you.."

"ya wouldn't be imposin', i offered."

you mulled it over for a moment then replied, "well, if you insist.."

following your impromptu dinner, you and taiju seemed to get closer. he had your number already because it was on the teacher-parent relationship form he'd received from the beginning of the year, but you'd found each other in the habit of texting each other almost every day. little did you know, this was something out of the ordinary for taiju, as he was rarely on his phone unless he needed it for business work.

taiju didn't know when it started, but that feeling he had once felt with his late wife... it was back.

he knew it was because of you. and that feeling - peace - was something that had seemed too foreign for so many years. the moment he met you again.. saw the way you were looking at him up and down, he knew that he was already falling for you. it was strange because taiju usually didn't let people in very easily, but with you, it was as if all his walls came down immediately. after months of spending time with you, seeing how you treated his son like he was your own.. he knew he couldn't ever let you go. he had to have you. and it was at that moment he knew he was in love.

but... did he really deserve you? he already felt that perhaps god wasn't going to give him another chance after his first love left this world. but slowly, he decided that made it was ok to be selfish again. that maybe if it was you, god would forgive him for wanting more. he reasoned that you would be such a great mom to koji some day, if you loved him back.

if you loved him back.

taiju was blind to the way you longingly gazed at him, wishing for something more. you wrestled with the ethical reasons first. was it wrong to date one of your student's fathers? after wrestling with that issue and your heart one, it was on to another challenge. what if he didn't like you back? after all, he'd opened up to you about his late wife.. explaining that she was no longer in this world... would his heart be ready and open to love someone else again? maybe he was just extremely kind, though you couldn't ignore the way you sometimes caught him looking at you... but you reasoned that it must be something you were trying to see rather than reality.

everything changed one night.

"thanks for tonight, again... i had fun." you shyly brushed away a stray hair behind your ear as you stood at taiju's doorstep. you'd had yet another one of your little "dinners" ("dates"?) with taiju as koji was at hakkai's for the night.

taiju remained silent, staring down at you. his eyes flicking between your own, and down at your lips. self-consciously, you licked them, swallowing in the uncomfortable silence.

"...is everything okay, taiju?"

his brows furrowed, "....can't..back.....you..."

you raised an eyebrow, moving closer, "what did you say taiju?"

he shuffled his feet closer to you, his hands ghosting over your hips, asking permission. "...i can't hold back anymore with you..."

you placed your hands over his, moving them securely onto your hips as you leaned even closer. "you don't need to hold back, taiju.." you stared at him, eyes hooded with desire.

he sucked in a deep breath, "i hope you know what you're gettin' yourself into."

you carded your hands gently through his hair, then ran them down his cheeks.

he searched your face for any indication of protest before he held more firmly to your waist. then, he leaned in, though he couldn't help himself, and did so rather rapidly, crashing his lips into yours. you felt something stir in your stomach as his lips pressed against yours and a moan escaped your mouth, thus allowing him entrance into your mouth. you felt his wet tongue roam around your mouth in between breathy pants and sharp curses. he moved in closer to you, one of his knees sliding in between your legs as he pushed you up against the door of his home, only the sounds of your moans and his curses between the two of you.

you couldn't hold back any longer, either, as you began to grind your clothed cunt against his black slacks, eliciting a sharp heave from taiju.

"fuck, just like that..." he breathed out between pants, once more encasing your lips in his.

you whimpered as you felt his hands lightly skim below the hem of your shirt. you leaned even closer, if that was at all possible, whispering a soft, "please" in his ear.

he growled, picking you up by the back of your knees and hauling you over his shoulder as you yelped in surprise. he hurriedly thrust open the door to his home, lugging you to his bedroom. he then placed you down, standing up just near the edge of his bed.

he drank in the sight of you as he reached toward his belt, preparing to unbuckle it, when you covered your hand over his.

"wait... can... can i?"

his eyebrows rose as a smirk grew on his face, "ya don't have to ask me twice."

he moved in closer to continue to kiss you as you fumbled to unbuckle his belt, then slide his slacks down his legs. while you continued your ministrations, he worked at unbuttoning your blouse. he could scarcely breathe as he took in the beautiful sight of your tits as they bounced free from your bra - a laced one - he noted. you were so beautiful.

"don't know what i did 't deserve this.."

"taiju, you don't ever need to earn love."

he kissed you again, moving his hands down to trace the outline of your ass. you were wearing a skirt, much to his pleasure, so he slipped his fingers under the hem, skirting his fingers against your thighs.

"jesus, fuck, yer already so fucking wet."

you moaned as his dexterous fingers moved between your thighs, then up toward your waistline, yanking your panties down to your knees.

without an ounce of hesitation, he stuffed a finger into your needy hole, groaning as he felt you clamp around his finger. he then began thrusting in and out of your cunt, adding another finger.

"ah, right there.." you moaned, feeling tears already pooling in your eyes.

"yer so fuckin' pretty, ya know that? so fuckin' pretty for me."

you could only whimper as you felt him continue to thrust his long fingers in and out of you with an almost inhuman speed.

suddenly, he withdrew his fingers from your drooling cunt and picked you up by your ass, tossing you gently onto the bed.

"i can make you feel even better than that," he promised.

without any other warning, he readjusted so his head was just between your legs, and began slowly licking at your wetness, using his finger to flick your clit.

"you taste so fuckin' good," he moaned, "'m already so fuckin' hard for you and i haven't even taken off yer damn skirt yet," he noted as your skirt had merely been pushed further above you, resting a few inches below your tits.

his mouth worked wonders as he lapped at your cunt, drinking you up as you moaned your praises while you gripped his hair tightly. he continued to drink you up as you shook with pleasure until you gripped his hair a little tighter, "taiju, taiju 'm close!"

you cried as he pulled back, your juices covering his face.

he let out a soft chuckle, "don't worry, darlin'. 's okay if i...?"

"yes, yes, please, taiju," you begged, bucking your hips up to try to convey your need and desire.

his eyes were nearly black with lust and he slipped off his boxers. and goddammit, you took in his rock-hard cock, and you weren't sure if you'd be able to take it. everything about this man was massive from his broad shoulders and wide chest that was covered in tattoos.. to even his fat cock, dripping with precum. it was red-hot as he guided it to your hole. you clenched tightly just around the tip and he sucked in a deep breath.

"jesus, doll, 'm not even half-way in," he quipped.

"i-i.. don't know if it's.. gonna fit, taiju," you worried.

"i'll be slow, if ya worried... shit, are you a virgin?"

you blushed a deep red, turning away and nodding.

"fuck, i didn't think i could get any harder. look at what ya do to me, doll."

you slowly turned, looking once more at his angry red rip. you could practically feel his heartbeat inside of you as he pushed deeper into you, ever so slowly. the deeper he went, the closer he leaned into you, readjusting as he took you into his arms.

"y-you can go faster now, taiju.."

sweat was dripping off of him as he tentatively asked, "ya sure?"

you nodded, "'m ready for you."

he couldn't have held back even if he tried after hearing you say that and he began immediately thrusting into you, his pace quickly gaining speed.

"ah-AH taiju!" you called his name, and he let out another groan, thrusting into you harder. you felt so hot..it was unlike any other sensation you'd ever felt before. the tight knot in your belly coiled further almost toward its breaking point.

and all at once, you shouted out his name, cumming onto his cock as he continued to thrust into you, attentively slowing his pace for a moment. just the sound of your yelps of his name, your moans of pleasure, it was enough to make him go insane. he'd never admit to you the hundreds of times he'd woken up in a sweat in his bed, his cock hardened as he dreamt of fucking you until you saw stars. he'd imagined how you'd sound, but nothing could compare to the sweet sound of reality. you were so fucking beautiful. the thought alone was enough to make him let out a loud moan before he quickly pulled out, releasing his seed into the bed sheets. he couldn't help it as his lips met your own sloppily as he muttered praise and curses, telling you just how lovely you are.

"let's clean you up, yeah?"

you nodded shyly, following him to the bathroom where he turned on the shower. you took the opportunity as he was turned around to hug him tightly from behind, muttering a quiet, "i love you."

he froze and for a moment you thought he was uncomfortable before he replied just as softly, "i love you too. so much."

the shower was warm against your hot skin, and you nearly melted as taiju worked at rubbing the shampoo into your hair gently. gaining a bit of confidence, you smiled mischievously and let your hand wander down to his cock. you were pleased to find it was already semi-hard. he took in a sharp breath, "quit teasin' me."

you turned around, letting the water wash the shampoo out of your hair as you replied, "i wanna make you feel good, too."

you swore his brain short-circuited what with the way his eyes bulged out of his head, eyebrows raised nearly to his hairline. however, just as quickly, a smug grin overtook his surprise. "gettin' bold already?"

not allowing him a chance to one-up you, you dropped to your knees, grasping his fat, drooling cock in your hand. you laughed as you heard him nearly choke in shock.

you gave his cock a few pumps before replacing your hand with your mouth, teasing the tip with your tongue as you heard him groan loudly from above you. you hummed, the vibrations sending chills down his body as you leaned further onto his cock, taking him in your mouth. he sighed breathily, stroking your hair and muttering, "just like that... yer so perfect..."

you hollowed out your cheeks, trying your best to take him fully. taiju, on the other hand, tried to be conscious of you, but he couldn't help thrusting his hips into you, causing you to gag. how the fuck were you so good at this?

you continued to suck him off and, unsurprisingly, taiju couldn't hold on for very long (he was beginning to realize in almost every case he couldn't hold back when it came to you). he made sure to warn you that he was about to cum, letting his seed splatter onto the shower floor.

"yer so good to me, doll. i hope ya know how much i love you."

you awoke to tangled limbs and messy hair and above all, perfection. everything was just right. taiju slept softly next to you, his strong arms embracing you tightly as you slept together.

maybe one more hour couldn't hurt.

a/n: lmfao remember when i only wrote fluff? lmfaooooo anywhere here's this shit

[jaehunnyy]

[10.05]

Genre: highschool!au, fluff

Word count: 0.9k

Pairing: highschool-boyfriend!San x gn!reader

Warnings: they are hs students but they r both legal and all (im just living my highschool love fantasy sorry), they r kinda rebel haha, pet names, kisses, San pins reader to the wall but nothing rlly suggestive its rather playful, san pouts—a lot, possible grammar mistakes

Taglist: @shakalakaboomboo, @bluehwale, @theficblog, @bluisheye93, @pinkimingi, @ssaboala

A/N: i do not encourage skipping school by any means aodosoao ive never done it actually BUT HERE ITS POSSIBLE OKAY.

Another sunny day in which you could have had fun anywhere else has found you in school. The halls of the big building you were in were filled with some of the pupils' laughter—but mainly with the others' exasperation for the new classes going to start soon. You were surrounded by the bothering motion around you, trying to spot the navy blue uniform you were looking for. Your phone started to vibrate in your pocket, but the fuss was too much for you to hear it. 

On the other side, your boyfriend was all pouty, the thought of not being able to see you during the break upsetting him. He kept calling and texting you, but it was in vain; you wouldn't be able to hear it due to the angry stomps belonging to the ones running to class. It was like the world decided against the two of you that day. 

"Sannie, c'mon, let's go. There's no way you would see them this break," Yunho told the younger boy, just to be met with a pair of puppy eyes, making him sigh. "San, you should stop skipping that much, you're doing it more often than Wooyoung!" 

The younger chuckled, his dimples furrowing his flawless face. "Please, just one minute! I promise it's the last time, dad." 

Yunho widened his eyes, frowning and hitting the other's shoulder playfully. "Don't call me—" 

"Look, it's them!" San exclaimed and jumped happily, opening his arms for you to jump when you reached him, forgetting about the blonde boy whose mouth was now hung open, the words aching to come out. 

The older sighed, though his lips ended up stretching in happiness when he saw how happy you made his friend. You landed in your boyfriend's strong arms, legs wrapping around his waist as he spinned you, not even noticing when the blonde saw an acquaintance of his and went to talk to him, leaving you by yourselves now. And your lack of attention was visible, cause you didn't bother to see the professor side-eyeing you because you were blocking her way—you two might have been in trouble.

"Sorry for interrupting you, Choi. And is that Y/L/N? Why are you not in class, when your teacher is already there?" she asked with a raised eyebrow, making you regain your posture immediately. 

San looked at you for a long time, words stuck in his throat, before you dragged him so the teacher could go to her class and leave the two of you alone. "Sorry, teacher." you replied rapidly, hoping she won't ask anything else. As soon as she left, you let out a relieved sigh, looking one more time at your boyfriend.

"I thought I wouldn't see you." he pouted again, his arms resting on your waist. 

"And I thought you were going to get both of us in trouble with the chem teacher!" you tried to bring him back to reality—but there was no reality when it came to you, he was in his own world.

"But I missed you."

"But it's already over, we are already late, so we should go…" you sighed, returning the pout to him. 

He smirked playfully, pinning you to the first wall he saw. You wanted to protest—but he got closer to you, the warmth of his breath making you forget your words.

"Not if I have a better idea, angel. Wait for me." he said and left immediately, leaving you no choice but to wait for him. 

He went to his class and gathered his things as fast as he could, coming back to you with disheveled hair due to running and his black backpack on his back.  

"Let's skip today, babe. Please?" he asked in a tiny voice, and there was no way you could have said no to him. 

You smiled softly and nodded, and he asked you to wait outside until he went to take your things as well. You did as he said, while he entered your classroom mindlessly, your teacher looking at him, flabbergasted. 

"Oh? Sorry to interrupt, I'm here to take my lover's things." he smiled innocently, and left almost as soon as he came in. 

You then started laughing at his antics, taking his hand in yours and starting to run to the stairs so you could escape your school. Your sweet giggles filled the hallway, making some professors shout after you. 

"Choi, Y/L/N! I'm calling your parents!" 

You and San only laughed harder, the adrenaline and love flowing through your veins stronger than anything. Couldn't they see you were in love?

"Thanks, for skipping school to stay with me." San whispered as soon as you reached the empty school yard, cupping your cheeks and looking into your eyes. 

“Who said I’m doing it to stay with you? I’m doing it to go home.” you teased him, looking at his poked out lips. 

You placed a chaste kiss on them, hugging his waist and resting your head on his shoulder. Even though you saw each other daily, he couldn't get enough of you. He has memorized your features from top to bottom, but everytime he looked at you, he saw something new in you, making him fall harder. 

“You were joking, right?” he asked with a soft voice, still unsure if you meant that or not. 

You smiled in return, linking your pinky with his. 

"Let's go, babe." 

And with a sweet kiss he placed on your forehead, the two of you started to walk peacefully, like the teenagers in love you two were. And even though you should have felt a bit bad for leaving like that, you forgot about it soon, cause everything felt right with Choi San by your side.

[walker-extended-universe]

4x07 Review

The writer's threw us a bone and gave us a somewhat lighter episode this week, probably to make up for the angst coming at us in "Witt's End". That's not to say "Hold Me Now" is without its share of strife- the Walker family continues to deliver on the dramatics (and I wouldn't have them any other way).

Today, I'm going to shake things up a bit and focus more on specific characters rather than specific plots. That's just the way it's lining up in my head with how condensed the plotlines were this episode.

Let's start off with the shortest character line this episode: Abby and Bonham's Great Retirement Debate.

This one starts with Bonham complimenting Liam's PT. During this conversation, Bonham finds out that Ben and Abby are officially going into business together with their wedding planning at the ranch, something that catches Bonham by surprise. Abby can do as she pleases, but this is his ranch too and, as her husband, he should know more about what she's up to.

Later, after his and Stella's quick self defense lesson, he confronts Abby on her making that choice without him. After all, this is not his idea of what their retirement looks like. Abby rebuffs him and makes an odd comment about supporting her son's dreams and they get into a staring contest, leaving Stella in a very awkward situation.

I'm not gonna lie, this is one of my least favorite stories they've given us this season. I understand they need to give these characters something to do but this whole thing feels trite compared to what's going on in the rest of the show and it doesn't seem to fit their relationship much, especially with all the development they had. At least the other characters are having interesting reactions to it.

Moving on, let's look at what Stella was up to this episode.

We see that Stella finally recieved footage of the break-in at her dorm but there's not much to go on and campus police don't seem interested in doing anything (related too hard to that one). She's also getting more desperate texts from Witt about the necklace. When August once again points out that they should probably loop Cordell in, she again rejects it. At this point, they're in too deep and telling him would only land them in more trouble.

August makes another good point in telling her they need to play a little offense. Until they get the necklace, she's in danger. If she won't get protection from their dad, she needs to learn how to take better care of herself. This prompts her to go back home. While she was looking for Cordell, she finds Bonham and he's more than happy to give her some self-defense lessons. Let's hope that's enough.

Next, let's talk August.

This one starts off in the morning, with Cordell and August talking in the kitchen. August offers to do a make-up family dinner when Geri gets back from her trip and Cordell accepts, acknowledging that he may have been wrong about why he and Stella went AWOL. However, August is still stuck with a 5pm curfew.

This is also the day of his bootcamp graduation, which is the entire crew finishing an obstacle course. Everyone who finishes the course in under 8 minutes will be a step ahead at the military training. Durin ghte early practice run we see August is at the head of the pack and one student is struggling more than the others. Trey reminds them that it's never too late to help otu a struggling trooper as they all need to be able to rely on each other before they break to run it again.

We pick up here when it's time for the actual run. August runs the course very well, so well that he's on track to break a record. But, just as he's about to finish, we see him look behind to see the student who was struggling from earlier. After a moment of hesitation, he runs back to give the student advice and encourage him through the rest of the course. Both of them still finish on time and Trey looks on with pride.

Side note: Trey has officially made it up to August for lying to him about still being a guidance counselor way back at the end of season 2.

While everyone is celebrating, we see a brief flash of disappointment on August's face when he processes that Cordell wasn't there to witness it. He puts a smile back on when Trey comes over to congratulate him and ask if he's ready for bootcamp. For the first time, we see August hesitate a bit about his military career as he says he's not sure and that he has a lot of options. Whether this indecision is related to Cordell's absence is unclear but it's nice to see him considering other options for his life.

Up next (for better or for worse) is Cassie and her work/life dilemna.

We start with Cassie arriving at work- and Luna arriving right behind her. We also get her calling him by his first name, David. As they head to the conference room to get back to the case, we get a conversation about their potential relationship- or rather why Cassie doesn't really want to explore one publicly. Not only is she up for lieutenant, but after everything with Kevin she doesn't want to rush into another workplace relationship. Luna respects that but we still get some playful banter.

Side note: I'm glad to hear there are candidates from outside the office; I feel like that makes this all more suspenseful than if it was just Trey and Cassie.

Cordell immediately gets them all focused on the job, starting with running down the suspect lists to make sure they have up-to-date information. While this doesn't seem to lead them much of anywhere at first, Cordell points them at a potential lead which- unfortunately- doesn't lead much of anywhere. Cassie and Luna are both disappointed, but understanding. It wasn't that likely that a grainy security camera that caught a partial on a guy's face would grant them a concrete lead right away. However, they both notice that Cordell is taking this whole case very hard and won't listen to anyone who tells him to take it easy.

This only adds to how overwhelmed Cassie feels by the case. The Jackal is not going to be an easy killer to catch and now she's seen it wreack havoc on both rangers and civilians. She asks Luna for advice on how he keeps it all from getting to him and he has an idea: karaoke.

While Cassie is apprehensive of this idea at first, she's more than happy to try it out. And we the audience are treated to both of them singing in between them getting closer to each other. While it does seem like their relationship is moving a bit fast, I can't blame Cassie one bit for wanting to jump on that.

Side note: I refuse to believe anyone would cheat on Luna.

The next day, Cassie and Luna are more than willing to leave the office after James dismisses them from a good day's work. However, Cordell's reluctance to move on gives them pause. They listen to Cordell's questionable theory on the zookeeper and, when Cassie realizes he's not going going to let it go, she offers to go with him and Luna is right behind her.

The zoo search is short but intense and, surprisingly, they do find something. Whether this is related to the Jackal or not is still up in the air but it's enough to call in the cavalry and check it out. While this is all going on, James takes the time to let Cassie know he approves of her and Luna, even though it's none of his business. This gives Cassie the confidence she needs to hold Luna's hand at the crime scene, which is a very sweet moment.

And now, the moment you've all been waiting for: Let's talk about Cordell.

As we all predicted would happen the moment he picked up that notebook, Cordell is completely throwing himself into this case. It's clear he's taking his responsibility as leader seriously in James' stead and he's not going to let his old partner down again. He's not going to stop until this lunatic is off the streets, regardless of the consequences.

At least, that's the intensity he gives off at work while he struggles to make connections between their potential leads and what little they know about the Jackal. I noticed he relied heavily on James' personal notes during this episode, which I think speaks a lot to the trust between them. Even though Cordell knew this case made James a bit crazy, he's still trusting his old partner's judgement here.

While he's leading the game at work, he's letting things slide at home, missing out on family dinner in favor of eating cereal and reading James' notebook again. When Abby tries to confront him on this, he assures her that everything is fine. He just has work to do. She accepts that answer, but I doubt that will last very long.

After the disenheartening failure of their first lead, Cordell seems more determined than ever to find some kind of connection between the Jackal and their suspect list, diving down to a former zookeeper that doesn't really have any of the hallmarks they're looking for. He's so determined to find that connection that he's willing to risk missing August's bootcamp graduation to check out the old zoo, which just happens to be near the Jackal's first kill. Despite the stretch of the lead and the fact that this could wait a day, he insists on going right away and lets Cassie and Luna tag along.

Side note: I have to wonder if he really thought he could search a whole zoo and make it back in time for August.

As they search the zoo, Cordell finds footprints in the mud and soon finds a strange figure to hunt down. He gets close, but doesn't get their man, getting a concussion and a good look at his shoes instead. While it's more than they had before, he's not satisfied. He wants to catch the Jackal above all else, even at risk to his own life.

Later, he comes home with his work duffle to find Liam sitting at his dining table. And he's got a lot to say, starting with berating Cordell for missing August's event. This leads into him pointing out how he's been ignoring Stella's needs after the break in. He then goes as far as to compare this current case to the Rodeo Kings mission- Cordell leaving his kids behind for work and leaving Liam to pick up the pieces.

Cordell brushes him off, insisting that he- and his kids- are fine and Liam can back very far off. Liam leaves the house in a huff, leaving Cordell to go back to his Jackal Investigation Porch, where he drops the duffle bag. He puts on gloves and we see that the bag is full of evidence, including some rope. We then get a very odd sequence where Cordell wraps the wrist around his own wrist and gets flashes of images of similar rope going over a victim's wrists. Which leaves us with the very big question of: What the fuck?

And that wraps up this week's episode. As usual, I'm left with far more questions than answers. Why does this retirement plot with Abby and Bonham need to be dragged out so long? Why did they tease us with Liam being an addict and just drop it? Will August ever convince Stella to own up to everything? Why is Luna so perfect and does that mean he's the Jackal?

Hopefully we'll start getting more answers next week. See y'all then!

[kangamommynow]

April in School

April 1 and I'm in my house freezing. Took the dog for a walk this morning and my fingers were numb. Look, Wisconsin weather, this is bullshit. Basically no winter this year, but we're holding onto the illusion of it too long.

My students wanted to play a prank on their other teacher today. We looked up some ideas at recess and the only one that didn't require a lot of planning ahead was that everyone should switch seats and act like normal. So when we came in from lunch, we all sat at random desks, including me. Julia looked around confused and finally was like, "ok then, what's up?" All the kids laughed. Not a big prank, but enough to thrill a bunch of 11 year olds.

There's two and a half months of school left this year. That's nothing. I feel the pressure, and I'm sure many of the students feel middle school looming ahead. Considering how far behind most of them are (from a general 5th grade standards level), I'm not surprised.

I hate the concept of "being behind". You are where you are. You need what you need. You know what you know. There's just an awful lot they don't know yet. Things they are expected to know for next year and they just... don't. Yet. But unless they actually want to learn it, no amount of dancing around and teaching it is going to help. We try to point out why they should learn it - how it will help them achieve their goals. We try to make it interesting, because it is. We try to teach it in new ways. and they just. don't care. Which sucks because I know they actually will need it later and I really do want them to be invested in growing on their path. Not to be stuck on the only paths left to them.

Example from today: So-and-so has $20. He buys something for x, y, and z. How much does he have left? They figured out that they needed to add x, y, and z. And then they tried to subtract that from $20. Here's the problem. They suck at borrowing, and $20.00 requires borrowing three times. It's confusing. So I encouraged them to think of a different way. Add up from the amount spent to $20, which is how you would deal with it at a cash register anyway. They looked at me like I was insane.

Another example: So-and-so has $22 and spends all of it, the same amount each day, for lunch for the next 5 days. How much does he spend every day? The first response is that you can't divide 22 by 5. Yes you can, when you consider decimals. Then they tried 3, 4, and 5. Once they figured out, with help, that $4 and some cents were required, they got stuck. $4 a day for 5 days makes $20. There's $2 left over. How can you split $2.00 into 5? That stumped them. sigh. Most of them got there by trial and error, but the concept that 200/5 is something they can do in their heads eluded them.

They'll be fine. I hope. They are a good bunch of kids. They're just 11.

[elektrischemaidchen]

Lisztober #23: Flowers of Hungary

Today we're taking a biographical trip down memory lane. The reason for this is that we still need enough Franz-and-Hungary for the next few days, so we have to get abstract today ;)

So, here's the „great“ story of how I got to Franz. (And I would be so interested to hear what your story is!!!! Tell us! You wouldn't all be here if there wasn't one ;) ) @franzliszt-official

I don't think there's anything that can please a family in the Ruhr area more than the following sentence: ‘I want to become a classical singer.’

I pestered them until they enrolled me in music school. And what a music school it was! It produced an outstanding internationally acclaimed composer & conductor, two tenors...and my precious Liszt-Thirst. (My thirst only. Electronic music, bah. Look at aaaall my voice filters!)

And that was mainly due to these two great people:

There was Márta on the one hand, and István on the other. Both originated from the Franz Liszt School of Music in Budapest - she studied singing, he did a doctorate in piano and composition - both emigrated to Germany in the early 1980s to enchant generations of music students with their Hungarian flair.

Márta had a fantastic habit of hammering out any musical accompaniment on the piano as if the devil himself was after her. She was tiny, very old and her high, heavily accented voice always demanded ‘more feeling’.

And this demand for ‘more feeling’ was not limited to singing. She was always keen for us to have a proper overview of music history and theory. She was a fantastic storyteller when it came to the background to pieces, in which phase of his life which composer had written what and why. She gave us CDs, dug out the most bizarre works that we had to rehearse and sometimes censored piquant passages with black sharpie („Not suitable for young ladies!“)  From time to time we had to première István's new – admittedly, very (very!!!!) specific - operas, had lots of great evenings with our orchestra colleagues... in short, a really great time for nerds.

Thanks to Márta, I also got into Liszt. That really changed my life. I'd like to say that Franz got me with the ‘Liebestraum’, but no, it was the Hungarian Rhapsody No. 8. <3 After that, I was hooked. And although I was/am really mediocre as a musician, Márta found my understanding of musically conveyed emotions worthy of encouragement. And I think it also triggered her national pride a little, that my love was for Franz and not Ludwig or anyone else.

At some point, she suggested to my mum that I really needed a piano myself. And I can still hear my mother in my ear: ‘Nya, where should we put it?’

I ended up with the crappiest instrument under the sun: a second-hand Casio SA 21. That was the beginning of the end. Lacelove and I watched a few gear videos of the thing a few days ago. ‘ Would be cool to put on the mixer.’ No. You can't do anything with it except play ‘Memory’ from Cats on 06 ‘Church Organ’ at your aunt's Christmas party while nobody listens to you because everyone is drinking eggnog....

Even the video was gut wrenching. I even hate the sight of it.

And it came as it had to: at some point, Nine Inch Nails/Trent Reznor came into my life and that paved the way for the stuff we do today.

I've forgotten so much music theory that it's really frightening. My unbroken love for Liszt has remained. Márta would be pretty shocked if she knew what I do today (or with Franz), I think. But I still miss her. <3

Marta was My singing teacher Strict and tiny And Hungarian More feeling, more feeling She screams at me And I don't know Whether I can give her all that She's always so angry To her piano And I guess That's often because of me She beats me up with Music history We practise all the arias Till I cry She gives me Hungarian Rhapsodies I can't escape them No more And then she asks me Who is your favourite Composer? And I say, oh, it's Franz Liszt She hugs me I get the kiss of consecration After that her rage is finally over And she says to my mum The child is a talent Because it knows true love Please buy her A piano right away I only get A fucked up Casio And then she asks me Who is your favourite Composer? And I say, oh, it's Franz Liszt Since then Franz hangs on my wall I caress every night A model of his hand Marta, if you knew what we do at night you would probably never rest again And then she asks me Who is your favourite composer? And I say, oh, it's Franz Liszt And I thank you So much I'm not sorry We had such a Such a good time You and me. And Franz List. And Franz Liszt.

[ughgoaway]

my thoughts today: grey hair matty

here is my current delusion to share with you all;

(tw: british spelling of grey and general slut energy)

(also this is not actual writing, I'm just rambling for 600 words <3)

You walk through the door after work and calling out matty's name and get an "in here!!" from the ensuite attached to your room. You come in to see a freshly showered matty, towel around his waist leaning forward and frowning slightly in the mirror.

He's pulling at his curls and looking at them in the mirror, he pulls them down towards his eyes trying to get a look in real life but they're not quite long enough for him to be able to see. You stand in the doorway pretty confused at your boyfriend's analysis before he says, "I'm going so grey now babe, how am I only 34 and every other hair is grey???" he pauses and turns to you, he reaches out his hand to pull you in so you grab it, soon he's pulling you in and wedging you between the sink and him. You start to fiddle and pull at his curls whilst he begins to look slightly behind you in the mirror. He says "do you think i should dye it?"

Before your brain could catch up with your mouth you blurt out "no!!"

Matty stops looking in the mirror and pulls back to look down at you, slightly shocked at your very quick reaction but he soon realises you didn't mean to react that way. Your red cheeks and avoidant eyes tell him all he needs to know. "What you like the grey huh?" he begins to tease, pinching your hip slightly.

You whine in embarrassment and bury your head in the junction between his neck and his shoulder, your left hand comes to wrap around his waist whilst the other pulls at the curls at the nape of his neck."Oh cmon don't be embarrassed sweetheart, it's cute you like the grey! tell me what you like about it"

You burrow your head deeper in his neck and give a very small shake of your head indicating you would definitely not be telling him what you like about it. Matty pulls your head out by your chin, pinching it between his forefinger and thumb. He connects your eyes and says, "if you tell me you might get a really nice present"

The mention of a gift entices you, you have a sneaking suspicion it's not going to be a physical present. Well... maybe a certain kind of physical present.

"It's just nice I don't know." you manage to say, it comes out meek and whiny but Matty is giving you small encouraging nods and staring with that look in his eyes. You quickly continue with, "Makes you look smart, very much professor vibes especially when you wear your glasses" you mention the last part in hopes he would wear them more, he has had them on sporadically recently but you couldn't help but love the feeling you got whenever you saw him in them.

"Ooh that's a good idea babe, maybe I should get a lab coat for tour- really lean into the whole grey vibe" You lightly laugh at matty's ridiculous antics and nod. His head is tilted slightly up whilst he is thinking, you lean up to meet him and give him a small peck bringing him back to earth.

He smiles down and gives you a longer lingering kiss before cheekily saying, "so you're into a student/professor vibe huh? New role play idea, I'll teach you maths and you get all hot and bothered at my grey hair?"

You giggle before saying "you teaching maths? yeah right" you snort at the end of the sentence but it's quickly replaced by loud laughter as matty fireman lifts you up, calls you cheeky and walks you into your room before unceremoniously throwing you onto your bed and crawling up to meet you.

anyway this isn't actual writing bc I have no brain cells currently but I just needed to share my brain rot it some way <3

[qqueenofhades]

Hi, do you have any tips on telling professors you’re dealing with depression? Like is it helpful to include details? Symptoms? It’s getting to the point in the last few days where I need to tell them something because I have assignments piling up and the symptoms I’m experiencing are getting pretty intense.

If It helps I think I’m dealing with atypical depression just based on how I relate to the symptoms list (leaden paralysis, oversleeping, severe rsd, can’t focus on anything even more than usual, just feeling an overwhelming physical emptiness in my brain). Ive been doing ok when I’m in class and I feel better then too, but when it’s done, as soon as I get home or am just you know trying to do my assignments or anything, it’s like a curtain falls on me. This has been creeping up on me for the last few weeks and I can recognize the circumstances that lead me here, but I feel like I’ve crossed a threshold in the last week from just having these worries and thoughts I could control to now this full blown physical Depression Experience that has control over me.

I don’t want to overshare so to speak and make my professors uncomfortable or permanently see me differently, but I also desperately want to be believed and accurately convey how disabled I feel right now in a practical sense. Just writing this all out to you took so much effort. I’m not really sure what to even ask for beyond extending my assignments to this weekend. This depression is so unlike what I’ve experienced in the past and I really don’t know where it’s going or what to expect. A part of me is hoping I’m just going to feel normal again in a few days but I can hardly think more than a few days out anyway.

I know all teachers are different but what would you want to hear and be ok with hearing from one of your students? What would you want to know?

Thank you so much for reading this and for any advice. I’m really sorry to just dump all of this here, I’m just not really sure where to turn right now. Please of course don’t feel pressured to answer. Thank you for your lovely blog and self. ❤️

Ooof. First of all, thanks for coming to me and I'm sure it took a lot of effort to put that together. I know that all-consuming, black-hole depression feeling, and it's not fun.

Here's what I would do:

First, reach out to your student counseling/health services center as a matter of priority. Almost every university has one, and they encourage you to take advantage of them. If that takes too much effort to do when you're in a funk, try to do it when you're on campus or have a little more energy. Say that you're really struggling and need to come in for an urgent appointment -- you don't need any more info than that, and they should be responsive/proactive about following up. There might also be a crisis line or priority email where you're assured a response in a certain amount of time.

Next, please do contact your professors and let them know what's going on! Here's a sample email for you:

Dear Dr. [Name],

I'm writing today to let you know in confidence that I'm experiencing severe mental health difficulties, which have been growing worse over the last few weeks and are negatively affecting my ability to participate in class. I am reaching out to the university counseling centers and other resources, but I am not feeling well at all and hope that you will be able to make adjustments to the deadline for [exam/project/paper etc -- fill in as necessary].

I will do my best to complete my work as expected, but please let me know if it is possible to arrange a meeting [via phone or Zoom if you don't want to come in], and discuss my options. I would like to know about the possibility of an incomplete grade or other ways to [pause/resolve/work with] my status for this semester.

I do apologize for any inconvenience, and hope that you'll be able to provide me with understanding and support in this difficult matter. I very much appreciate your time and consideration.

Best wishes,

[Your Name]

Hopefully, you can just copy and paste that with a minimum of effort, tweak it as necessary, and send to them. You can also reach out to the Disability Services office (as every university is required to have one) and see if accommodations can be made/allow you to complete work at a later date. If it's really bad, you also have the right to contact the university registrar and arrange for a leave of absence.

Anyway, this is to say: you have options to take care of yourself and make sure that the people around you know what is going on and can help develop a plan to deal with it, so please do take them! I know how awful and draining it feels, but if you need any other advice, please let me know, and I will do my best to answer. If you have a Tumblr account and want to DM me privately with more details, like the name of your university etc, I can also look for these resources and give you the information, so as to minimize the amount of pressure and extra work on you.

Hugs. <3

[songbirdstew]

Here we go.

Today, the assistant principal told Royal to cover up their shirt for the rest of the day, and suggested they not wear it to school anymore, because, and I quote, "Hate goes both ways." Which. Gentle yikes, buddy, but okay.

Here is the shirt in contention.

They started wearing it in fall of 2022. As far as I know, it was never an issue, no one complained, they were never told not to wear it. Because it was DTG, the print wore off eventually. Royal was bummed about that. So I made them a new one to replace it. It's more clearly homemade, and the "^ straight" is in red instead of white, bc Proper Copy Editing Practices, yo.

They started wearing the new version 3 weeks ago. They've worn it 3 times total. The first time, their science teacher chuckled at it, and one straight student said it was mean. The second time, more straight students commented on it & said they were uncomfortable, and a TA suggested maybe they shouldn't wear it to school. And today, the Assistant Principal gave his very illuminating peace speech above, while a straight student said, "EW, GAY PEOPLE," to Royal's face.

Royal isn't terribly comfortable confronting or debating anyone directly, much less a teacher/staff person, and especially not this AP, who, like all APs, has a policy of "Just do what the grown ups tell you and don't argue." So far, they don't want me or Curtis to get involved. They vented to me on the car ride home, and I feel they made several valid points. I've encouraged them to speak to the school counselor and ask her to intercede on their behalf or mediate, and I've encouraged them to document every instance of queerphobia they experience, BECAUSE IT'S A LOT, and to write down everything they've told me re:their thoughts and feelings on the situation.

Currently, Royal's Very Petty Plan TM (their words) is to continue wearing the shirt, but with their hoodie zipped up over it. And, again in their words, "If I get a referral over it, so fucking be it." As Curtis said, "It isn't the shirt that's causing problems, it's other people seeing it that's causing problems."

So that's where we are right now. Dying to tell the AP, If you don't like the way my kid deals with homophobia, maybe you should have dealt with it yourself. Responsibility and respect go both ways, too.

[tacroyy]

more on education&work—lack of agency & denial of expression of children in education.

something else about education is that you really get used to not being heard. and, in a parallel way, you get used to not listening. people don't want to keep listening to you talk about how exhausting and underfunded and underresourced things are, and that is deeply fair of them to react that way, but also you keep having those feelings, because you are just constantly exhausted and underfunded and underresourced. but then, the kids are having those feelings too. you're making them do unchildlike things day in and day out and you hear it so much that you forget to listen to what you are constantly hearing. so a school district hears that its not supporting its teachers and students and staff so often that it stops listening. and everyone around teachers hears that teachers arent being resourced or funded and its such a constant hum they have to stop listening. and teachers hear that students are tired and dont want to work and hate school so much that they wont listen anymore. its this big cycle and something that's actually really nice is that... it does help to break it. when you listen to a kid they glow about it and try harder—but not in the way that makes them inauthentic! like today a kid who doesnt engage much shared a language thing when they "shouldn't" have (don't talk while teacher is talking etc) and they were so excited to share, so i engaged, so they loved it, so they engaged more, so they learned some stuff and had a good time. like... you dont quash the excitement and the interest, even if—especially if!—it is inconvenient.

districts and those that fund education should be able to do that too. educators can be so inconvenient—teachers really are the worst people; you have this group of cats who have created their own little realms where they are in charge and then you try to tell them what to do and act confused when they're like "bitch, and you are?" like yes. our educational structure sucks absolute ass, it sucks that we're putting One Adult In Charge like this, it's NOT a good system. but dont be SURPRISED by that, please. you (districts/governments/societies/funding structures) CREATED and/or SUSTAIN this structure for education, and then to be like "omg why do teachers get so offended" um because you don't ever make us work together for REAL. you just SUSTAIN the shitty individualistic adult-as-authority cycle. SO few can coteach (imagine........ having another qualified person, or multiple other qualified people in the room with you??????? mindbending) and if they do coteach they still have separate realms generally (like a sped teacher pushing into gen ed, or two teachers taking a difficult class and one "goes high" and the other "goes low"). just—to go back to my point. if you find something educators are EXCITED about, encourage them and listen!!!!!! even if they are yelling at the "wrong time." they're yelling for a reason. im yelling about how kids are getting really good at standing up for themselves. we should ENCOURAGE that. they can identify and put words onto things that older generations treated as taboo, like abuse and bullying and all forms of prejudice, racism and sexism and queerphobia and ableism— i mean, a kid once told me, word for word, that they were "having a mental health crisis." they used ALL of the right language. the kids are LISTENING to us. they are DOING IT BETTER THAN WE WERE.

and then teachers keep saying—why are the kids so DIFFERENT than they used to be? because kids are starting to want to take care of themselves, for once. they have learned how to say no. and it's wonderful. and it makes you change. and teachers are the rulers of their realms. and their realms cannot change according to the teacher-rulers. but the change is calling from inside the fucking classroom!!!!

breaking cycles is good. really listening is good. its overwhelming to not tune anything out. but if you tune things out, you dont break cycles.