#(but the paraphrasing is totally crack)

[myalchod]

So @unreliablenarratorink let me headcanon all over her after a comment exchange on her brilliant new Farah-as-Bloom's-mom fic (GO READ IT) got out of hand and made the mistake of headcanoning back, and then suddenly:

Alfea: Saul, come home. Saul: In jail, dude. Alfea: Ben needs you. Saul: Ben is a grown-ass adult and can solve his own problems. Alfea: Sky needs you. Saul: *sulking* He has his actual dad. Alfea: Farah needs you. Saul: … fuck.

No, I don't know what I'm on either. 🤣

[ineffableducks]

I THINK CROWLEY WAS A SERAPH?????

yes like the seraphim. like the highest order of heaven. like. the angels who have six wings and eyes all over them.

i understand that i probably need to provide evidence even though this is definitely just a headcanon currently. i'm very interested in mythology as a pagan, and i study demonic and angelic hierarchies in my spare time. so this is something i'm very interested in and i feel like i've cracked the case.

SO a couple things from the new season have been making me think that crowley was a rlly high ranking angel.

like we all knew that it was a little weird how he had the power to literally stop time in the first season. and then in this season, we see him literally manufacture star nurseries and nebulas. he's a lot more powerful than he lets on. as someone else described, he's incredibly powerful and being "just some guy" about it.

anyway we get some hints about what level of angel he's at. in the last episode, muriel tells him that only those ranked thrones or dominions or higher can access certain files in heaven. and crowley can.

now quickly, here are the ranks of the angels.

now, higher orders don't necessarily mean they are more powerful. in the context of good omens alone, gabriel is the supreme archangel and the most powerful. and even though principalities (like aziraphale) are ranked closer to god, they are less powerful than archangels.

so yeah crowley totally could have been an archangel, except they're ranked below thrones and dominions which means he couldn't have accessed the files. it doesn't even seem like saraqael could have accessed them, as she just watched even though she is an archangel. so i think crowley once upon a time was a higher rank than an archangel.

so that leaves four candidates. dominions, thrones, cherubim and seraphim. and thanks to a little line in episode 201, i think i've worked it out.

when beelzebub warns crowley about heaven's extreme sanctions, crowley tells them that (paraphrasing), "extreme sanctions aren't a thing. we just made them up to scare the cherubs."

THE CHERUBS. now, the plural of cherub is cherubim, and a cherub is often depicted as a baby angel, with similar iconography to cupid. so it makes sense that he's describing making up a story to scare the baby angels but it ALSO implies that the cherubim were ranked beneath him.

what's the only order of angels above cherubim? seraphim. va-voom.

and in case i need to further prove my case, do you know what the base word for seraphim is? it's the hebrew saraph, which means "burning" and sometimes is used as a noun to denote... "serpent."

i've never really been into the fan theory that crowley was raphael before the fall. and now i don't think i do, mainly because im convinced he was one of the seraphim and raphael is always described as an archangel.

we might never know crowley's angel name, if it was different to his demon one. but i think the main takeaway is that he was a lot more powerful than first impressions might serve.

[waitmyturtles]

THE MORNING AFTER: ONLY FRIENDS, EPISODE 8 ("TAKE A LOOK AT YOURSELF IN THE MIRROR AND CRY") EDITION

Oh my gosh, I am shaking my head and just laughing. I have no idea where to start writing this, but it's gonna be damn fun to pick this episode apart.

Because of the clues that Jojo Tichakorn (below) and Ninew Pinya dropped before and during the episode's airing yesterday, my mind was totally on Freddie and Queen. I captured the tweet below and couldn't help but think of lyrics.

And the episode was titled "Save Me"!

Before I go on, I have a little personal note. During my watch of MAME's TharnType, I talked a bit about the bigotry against the queer community that I grew up with in my Indian family. During my childhood, Freddie Mercury was -- everything. He was everything to me. A part-Indian man who blasted past any obstacles that could have held him back to become a superstar, while leveraging unbelievable talent. My dad often wanted to snap my Queen CDs in half to keep Freddie out of our house. Up until I went to college, when a new world of music awaited me, Queen was MY BAND. I'll never forget watching his memorial concert on television in 1992, watching Axl Rose destroy "We Will Rock You," and subsequently watching Axl host a Queen documentary on MTV that got repeated for years and years. This shit was formative to my childhood, and I'm gonna guess, to Jojo's and Ninew's childhoods as well. We be old bags in here.

I'll get back to Freddie in a few minutes. but besides all of the Queen themes (quick note: the dude that Sand was about to make out with was wearing the same costume that Ninew caught in his IG stories, as Freddie sang "Love of My Life"), oh my fucking god, did this episode ever touch upon ephemerality, highs and lows, change, and a resistance to change that people have unto others.

Top and Cheum -- especially Top -- were clutching their pearrrrrllllsss at Mew's changes.

Top and Cheum notice that Mew's trying on a new suit. And Mew admits it! He says to Ray in the bookstore -- after the most BRILLIANT call-out to a BL trope if I ever saw one, the CRACKING of the romantic memories montage, which, omg, are we EVER seeing in Dangerous Romance, like three times a bleeping episode, LMAO -- "I'm bored with myself."

I love -- I hate it, but I love that this episode calls it out -- I love that Top and Cheum are calling this behavior out as if it were a bad thing.

Is it?

.... is it not okay for university students to take a bump of coke if they're curious about it? Barack Obama did it -- and Obama admitted it, AND wrote about it, AND became president, twice. Judge him, I dare ya.

On another side, Nick susses out Boston, and wants to check in with him. Boston wants Nick to go bye-bye. Nick tries a guilt pull. And Boston ain't having it.

Fuck. (Side note, Boston was my man this episode.)

I'm shaking my head in wonder for Mew and Boston to be addressing Top, Cheum, and Nick in this way. We've established (here and here, cc @ranchthoughts and others) that the kind of toxicity that this OF group of friends exhibits is just -- common, and pedestrian, and awful to think about existing, but in part, it's so awful for us to be thinking about it, because actually, it's ever-present in our lives, and so many of us survive dealing with other people on a daily basis by using means by which to ignore or avoid that toxicity, like our addictions to our phones, or addictions to other vices, like sex and drugs -- which takes us right back to Only Friends.

The dynamic I saw happening in this episode was like vultures (the friends) circling their prey (their friends), but instead of the friends eating their friends -- what some of the friends are doing is trying to correct the behavior of their other friends. Top and Cheum want Mew to... go back to being the old Mew, maybe. Nick wants Boston to know -- morally, I think you're a bad person. And Boston says, I paraphrase, "see. if. I. fucking. care." and literally creates the NeoTitle ship before our eyes, lmao, all while walking silently and ignoringly away from Nick.

Top, to Mew, says, "Are you sure?" Are you sure you want to be like this now, Mew? Cheum shares with Top her concern about Mew's changes, and literally teams up with Top to bring Top back to Mew to, what, straighten Mew out?

Last time I checked, Mew's a big boy. Mew's made his decisions to be with Ray, to drink with Ray, to snort coke with Ray. Are those behaviors questionable? Sure. Are they normal behaviors for a university student who is bored with himself, and wants to try something new? 100%.

I have written before, in my review of Theory of Love, that while behavioral change can oftentimes be massively difficult, there's another side to change that needs to be considered. When one person changes -- there are many others within that person's sphere that do not want that specific person TO change. If one individual changes, within a worldview of a group -- that changes a group dynamic. People like Top and Cheum are unsettled that Mew and Ray are dating, and that Mew's getting wasted and high. Are they rightfully concerned for Mew's health? For sure. But what about Mew's agency and happiness? Are the friends understanding that this is actually Mew's choice to do these things, regardless of how the friends judge his specific actions?

The fact that Top and Cheum are questioning Mew's agency, to me, is a ROOT, a FOUNDATION of the awful toxicity of this friend group, BESIDES the general drunkenness of the group, and Ray's particularly contradictory and dangerous behavior. THERE IS NO TRUST IN THIS GROUP.

Top and Cheum do not TRUST Mew -- an adult young man!!!! -- to make his own decisions. Cheum doesn't trust Boston with her little bro (oh, woops on that, big sis). Almost no one trusts Ray, although I'm not sure about Mew on that. Boston doesn't trust Nick. The list goes on.

Without trust, without a foundation of love and respect, without an acknowledgement that individuals within a group have agency to live their lives independently -- what you get in a group dynamic is UTTER mush, just a bucket of vomit like what we're seeing here in Only Friends. I am OBSESSED that Jojo and team are picking this apart SURGICALLY, and asking US to question OUR, the viewers', judgement of all of this. These friends are contradictory as fuck. Boston was SO right to ask Nick: "who are you to judge?" Nick acted as filthily as Boston in violating Boston's privacy and rights -- TWICE, bros, TWICE.

And Top.... @lurkingshan said it the best yesterday when she made sure the girlies knew that what Top was doing TO (NOT FOR, TO) Mew at the end of the episode was not consensual. Welp. Tie up Mew's agency with a bow and throw it out into the fucking dumpster, Top.

I haven't touched as much on the Sand/Ray dynamic in this post, but of characters that are acting at least consistently to their... what, their moral judgements or ethical structures, at least Sand, Ray, and Boston remain consistent in my eyes. Anyone who was surprised at Ray's behavior in this episode -- it was bad and icky, and the episode laid it on thick, but I found his behavior to be expectedly toxic.

This was a two-steps-forward-and-one-step-back episode for Sand, as I see it, as he stepped in to try to keep Ray from going to jail (and how interesting was it that it was Top who ended up sealing that deal). One other note about Sand: the show HAS to be making fun of First's inability to sing, right? That guitar practice in 2/4, oof. And to have Sand dress up as Freddie, one of the most magnificent singers in rock -- ironic. We know that Sand doesn't aspire to be a singer; he just wants to go to festivals, and... that's the right decision, my dude.

Anyway. To bring this back to Freddie and Queen. Talk about shapeshifting. In his 20s in the 1970s, Freddie Mercury started out with long hair and flowing, robe-y costumes. As the 1980s progressed, he took on an identity of a mustachioed, slightly muscular man -- very, very closeted, but clearly gay to anyone who caught the signal.

The dude that Sand was about to make out with at the party? He made a reference to Mary Austin, Freddie's longtime companion and best friend. They were lovers for a short period, before Freddie came out to her. And they remained friends all of the rest of his life. While Freddie died with a longtime lover by his side in Jim Hutton, Mary was always present and devoted to Freddie. Mary's presence often caused consternation with Freddie's lovers, especially after his death, what with inheritance controversies. But no one ever questioned Mary's loyalty, and her commitment to keeping Freddie's identity secret and safe.

Freddie and Mary's friendship was in part a protective arrangement for his life in the closet. He only revealed he had AIDS the day before he died. But Freddie claimed the friendship, claimed agency to it, and wanted it in his life. The friendship was steady, and never wavering.

Quite the opposite of the devotions, or lack thereof, in this group. These young folks are demonstrating NORMAL resistance to watching each other change. But while that resistance is normal... it doesn't make it all the less toxic. I'm afraid that as of right now, I read that all of these friends want to sell each other out for the sake of their own selfish desires, and for the benefit of their own worldviews alone.

HAPPY SUNDAY, Ephemerality Squad, if we can be happy after this demonstration of toxicity, ha! @slayerkitty @ranchthoughts @chickenstrangers @lurkingshan @twig-tea @distant-screaming @clara-maybe-ontheroad @neuroticbookworm @elizabethsebestianhedgehog @thatgirl4815

[stars-in-the-night]

I'm sure most people on Tumblr are aware of Gretchen's "we should totally just stab Caesar" speech from Mean Girls:

Gretchen Weiners had cracked. - YouTube

But what I'm not sure is whether most people on Tumblr know that she's actually paraphrasing Cassius' monologue from Shakespeare's Julius Caesar.

Happy Ides of March, everyone!

[wewouldgobackintime]

whoops i totally forgot that may is already happening, so let's put fortnight and ttpd together

when i heard "i was a functioning alcoholic" for the first time i knew that it would be not like the albums that came before it. absolute insane way to start a taylor swift album (any album really) and it sets the mood so well.

but then (paraphrasing) "at dinner you put my ring on the finger where other people where wedding rings and that's the closest i've come" was the moment where i realised this album would break me because the sadness of the lines and in her delivery - i almost started crying.

also i find it so interesting how she already says that the "magical" fortnight ended, and then she jumps straight into ttpd describing how it was when it was good. but there are also so many cracks already!!

a romance fated to happen but doomed from the start

[ist-das-kunst-oder-kann-das-weg]

I am back in Germany again, came here to get my tooth properly done. Went pretty well, I thought it would hurt badly, but well, I guess, it's dead so there isn't too much that can hurt left. Because I asked so nicely, they also made dental imprints for a night guard for my teeth, mhm.

In the afternoon I went to see a GP for my ankle. It was fucked up without me fucking it up and just started hurting when making specific movements one morning. While looking at my ankle, the doctor was at first confused that he could move my foot pretty far. After I told him that last year, the orthopedic told me I was hypermobile he was like "yeah, I can see that o.o". And after that, to paraphrase him, he basically said, sucks to be you, if your tendons and ligaments are worn out, you will just always have a weak joint. Get used to it. He said it nicer, tho, and I totally thought that already. It just hurt differently than the usual slight tweaks and pinches and with certain moves cracks reaaallly loudly. When I told him that he was also like, yeah, I heard, but he only heard the normal crunch of an ankle? Whatever. He also prescribed me physiotherapy and sent me to get an MRI. To see what is fucked up exactly.

I should have returned that book to the library and not borrowed ten CDs back in Denmark. Damn.

But at least I had a pretty productive day. Tomorrow, I want to finally write another application and be even more productive.

[zukkacore]

I would fucking love to learn about hockeygate

I'm not the most involved in booktok but i was privy to this drama i don't know how but i did stumble upon it. To be fair. There's literally like articles and videos and stuff that probably explain it better than me, like this is actually getting mainstream coverage it's kinda wild.

Anyway it starts with the fact that there's this Why Choose (reverse harem) hockey romance book that blew up on tiktok called Pucking Around.

So it becomes a thing on tiktok for people who like this book to basically to do faceclaims for the characters with actual real hockey players—i'm not sure if this was independently inspired or if the author was like "yeah these fictional hockey players are totally inspired by [insert real hockey player here"]. One of said fancasts is this guy named Alex Wennberg who plays on the Seattle Krakens.

This booktoker named Kierra Lewis blows up really quickly and gets a pretty decent following mainly from, like, making comedic tiktoks that are basically thirsting over these real hockey players on the Seattle Krakens & how much they look like her book boyfriends which includes Alex. & im sure its like meant to be all in good fun & hornyposting online has its sphere as long as its not invading the lives of the real people involved (kinda like how everyone had the hots for Pedro Pascal which i get but contriving every interview so that he's bombarded with everyone's thirst tweets and comments feels like its devolving into harrassment guys) so i get that. A lot of the jokes are sexual & there's a pretty common one she makes about wanting Alex Wennberg to "crack her back" etc, its play on "break my back" i think? Or maybe its a kraken pun?? idk.

& a lot of the hornyposting about the hockey players involves like making fancams of the players groinstretching on the ice & in these poses that fans sexualize them in, etc etc. I wanna point out that like it's not just Kierra doing this, its a whole sphere of hockey romance booktok, but she is a pretty prominent figure in this story.

Anyway all this hornyposting about the seattle krakens gets the attention of the kraken's actual social media account, so they start playing into it too. Posting thirst traps of the players and stuff. So The Krakens were benefiting from the attention from Booktok, but at the same time, it feels pretty ridiculous to claim that a popular team in a well-loved longstanding sport was, like, "discovered" or made relevant by booktokers.

Kierra Lewis actually gets invited to a Krakens game, like she gets flown out, she gets like a Kraken's jersey that says "booktok" on the back etc etc. & she's posting tiktoks from the game. & i'm gonna editorialize more than i previously have to give more of my personal opinion here, but this is the part that I think is particularly just, inappropriate and in bad taste. b/c she's like filming the players on the ice while they do their stretches and making sexual comments, like shouting "crack my back" to them while they're on the ice, like it's very much the same thing she's doing on tiktok but online is one thing, that's at least worthy of a conversation of like what privacy really is online, but it's another thing to be making comments like that to their face while at a person's place of work.

After all this, the wife of Alex Wennberg, Felicia Weeren, makes a post on social media basically asking people to ease up on all the suggestive comments about her husband online, not just for her sake but b/c it makes her husband uncomfortable, too. She's basically asking for people to be more mindful of how they post, and im paraphrasing in her sentiment that people would view this behavior targeted towards her husband and the other hockey players and inappropriate if women were the recipients of the sexual comments.. It's been impacting their lives because their online presence now is basically just swarmed with people making suggestive comments, people in their lives irl are commenting on it & making jokes about it, etc etc.

(& i personally don't love when people make the "if the genders were reversed" arguments b/c that tends to lead to false equivalency & also b/c people broadly don't take harassment of women seriously, but tbh she has a point. While people don't take harassment of women seriously, i think broadly left-leaning people at least understand the shape of like, what a catcall is and why its bad. & part of the reason this went uncommented on for so long is part of the patriarchal stereotype that men always want sex which is used to dismiss male victims)

She was pretty measured about the whole thing all things considered, especially b/c she said she's all for female empowerment and sexual expression & she doesn't know if there is a simple answer to this stuff, but there has been boundary crossing with how extreme and vocal its getting & especially b/c its affecting her husband at his work.

In her post, some of the examples she included as inappropriate comments included posts made by Kierra. She didn't single out Kierra directly, but she did use her posting as representative of a larger trend in the hockey romance booktok fandom.

The post from Felicia was taken really poorly by booktok and people started harassing her and her family including their kid, and saying she was being dramatic, saying she wants to be the center of attention, fabricating rumors about her and Alex wennberg that they were having "marriage trouble" etc etc. This includes Kierra lewis getting pretty upset and taking the post as though she's being singled out personally. Mostly doubling down, deflecting, saying it's all just a joke.

And perhaps it does suck to be treated as representative of an entire group of people, and being the most prominent face of something, she would inevitably get the brunt of backlash. But also she was the one invited to the game and was making all those comments like shouting at the players and stuff, so I do think she has to take a larger ownership over her behavior than random people posting online.

During this time she also finds out the Kraken's social media unfollowed her, so she's also expressing resentment that the Krakens were playing into the thirst trap stuff but suddenly have turned against her.

And yes, it was all just probably meant to be in good fun, but from the wider internet outside of booktok, it just seemed pretty inconsiderate and crappy to double down after people expressed that they were uncomfortable with what is basically sexual harassment. Yes, the Kraken social media was feeding into the hype, but the social media account is not representative of the players and their attitudes, and it was clear that the players stopped being comfortable with what was going on. Tbh there was quite a bit of victim blamey rhetoric. Consent can be revoked at any time. (& i have seen some arguments that b/c its sexual harassment (& in the workplace!) and not just like, an encounter in the bedroom, it wouldn't even have been possible for Alex Wennberg to consent in the first place b/c you can't consent to harrassment. It was just harrassment the whole time.)

Anyway, the harassment toward Felicia got so bad that Alex Wennberg had to come out and also make a statement in support of his wife

But the reason that post is making fun of booktokers thinking they made hockey relevant was b/c that was a pretty funny and common argument from Kierra and other booktokers who were not backing down on their position that they did nothing wrong. They kept being like "well we made the Kraken's relevant", "we brought all this attention to hockey", "the Krakens would be nothing without booktok." it was all very bizarre.

[olderthannetfic]

Heyo, anon who was thinking about writing a Murdock/mannequin fanfic and asked about crack fics. I have realized that the term "crack fic" probably doesn't really fit the premise; I guess I was thinking about "fic for a (kinda sorta) crack ship" and my brain short-circuited that into "crack fic" (oops). Your description of "strange subject matter written in a standard way" does fit my premise nicely, I guess it wouldn't really be a crack fic then. The episode that ship is from also shows later that he genuinely cared about the mannequin and is really upset when it gets broken irreversibly later, so this is more along the lines of Murdock genuinely having a thing for and a relationship/an affair with this mannequin rather than just joking about it, so yeah, the plan is: strange subject matter but non-crackish depiction.

As for the definition of crack fics: the ones I have come across have been a) "usual/standard premise but intentionally silly/wacky (humourous) writing intended to be read as silly as if one had to be on crack to write it and to take it seriously" b) "strange/silly premise and intentionally silly/wacky (humourous) writing intended to be read accordingly as if one had to be on crack to think of the mere premise of the fanfic" c) "strange/silly premise and dead-serious writing as if the plot were the most standard and regular fanfic premise to ever premise plottily," so to say.

My personal definition would probably fall somewhere between a) and b), although I'd love to find more cases of c), as that sounds the most fun to read to me. Have also come across crack fics by middle/high-school students, and by that I mean people who wrote in their author's note stuff like "lolllz i wrote this during lunch break at school with a couple of friends and they dared me to post it so here you go lmaooo" (this is paraphrasing of course, but I have stumbled across multiple crack fics that have author notes like this).

Btw have decided to give it a go, so I'd like to thank you for helping me reach that decision! I was unsure whether this idea would be too silly to write, but then remembered that no amount of silliness can stop me from making fictitious people and fictitious mannequins smooch, ha! (Also am going to look for that Care Bears fanfic, that sounds like fun, so thank you for the recommendation.)

Another btw: I am no longer thinking that Murdock's potential depiction of potential interest in guys is just a joke... Have just seen "There goes the neighbourhood" (4x10), and pretty close to the beginning, they're deciding to leave with a client and her friend/boss is staying in the room, so they're saying their goodbyes and then exiting the room, and Murdock is the last to leave, and he says, "Such a pleasure meeting you, let's do lunch!" and puts on his hat and charmingly smiles at the guy, and then the camera is on the guy who does look interested. I am deciding to categorize this interaction as "not-subtle-at-all flirty encounter," and now firmly believe that either the character was written/directed as bi/pan or bi-curious (considering how much cheek-in-tongue innuendo and humour the show has, I wouldn't be that surprised if they'd decided to subtly and not-subtly get a non-straight character past homophobic film/TV censorship of the 80s) or the actor decided to portray him as interested in guys without the studio/director/whoever-decides-stuff knowing or approving, heheh. (Or the actor just felt like flirting with or hungrily staring at handsome guys, which I also respect lol.) Let's just ignore that I gravitate toward rarepairs and that that probably means I tend to interpret stuff as romantic/sexual interest innuendo that's not actually meant/written to be interpreted as such and that most other people don't bat an eye at, and that that probably means my interpretation is total bullshit, ahem. XD

Also wanted to say thank you for letting me ramble about this specific headcanony stuff from a circa 40yo TV series and unload my silly little thoughts and probable over-interpretations into your inbox. (Holy shit, this ask got long. Sorry for that!)

--

"Crack treated seriously" is how people often talk about option C.

[lightningandfireinmybones]

I am in a mood and ever since I have read those fan notes Ewan relied to with “ I will be in your corner and thinking of you” (and I am paraphrasing) I go back to it a lot.

I love the idea of someone being in one’s corner unapologetically, no questions asked, will bury a dead body for you, every-tongue-that-rises-shall-fall kind of reverence.

So I am thinking of an extremely overwhelmed stripper-Valeana after putting down a particularly mouthy customer in their corner, she is used to it and takes no shit but it gives her mad anxiety afterwards (because she is a protector always?) and Aemond catches her twisting her hands later because she is so shaky and then she proceeds to make a quiet exit to have a smoke and try and put it behind and not fall a victim to the rage ONLY for sugar daddy Aemond to jump in caveman style. Outside the club he walks up to that said customer, crowbar in hand, calm but menacing and with no expressions on his face and it would appear to onlookers that he is about to ANNIHILATE the wee man but he just absolutely totals the chads red sports car. With satisfying and sure hits, he just makes sure it will cost him a pretty penny in repairs and then he just walks towards the guy and very cooly put his hands inside the man’s pockets, opens his wallet and takes a visiting card and tosses it back.

Anyway I am in a mood #thistooshallpass and other #ridiculously #tritestuff

P.S: chapter 8 was magique and I have read it six times already.🤫

I LOVE COOL COLLECTED AEMOND WREAKING HAVOK YESSSS

Aemond has been spending enough time with Valaena to realize 2 things:

1) she really can handle things herself (Valaena grew up with 5 brothers that she routinely thrashed) she throws a MEAN right hook and knows how to make high heels deadly weapons if she so chooses

2) she doesn’t LIKE handling things herself something’s ,,, baby girl has anxiety, and can absolutely handle the people who think they are entitled to her body because she strips, but hates the shaky hands after, the crash of adrenaline and the pitying looks, the fact that she has to handle her own business

So when he sees it go down, he stays in his chair, cracking his crystal tumbler of scotch with the force of his rage, watching as she breaks the wrist of the man who dares grab her before the bouncer pulls the man away, but he also sees the way her body just seems to deflate after, the way her nails tap rapidly, and he just knows that the broken wrist isn’t enough, that Valaena has enough rage to fill all the seas but sometimes needs help letting it out

Calm as can be, he’d grab a golf club from his car while the man argues with the bouncers outside the club, a crowd convening to watch the spectacle as he refuses to get in his ostentatious sports car (Valaena huddled in the shadows, looking so small and half drowning in the huge coat she’s wearing)

Aemond would walk past the crowd, past the man (he’ll kill him later, right now Valaena needs this more), and just OBLITERATES the man’s car

When he’s done and sees the little smile on Valaena’s face, he just pulls out a business card, thousands of pounds fluttering to the ground (he doesn’t give a shit about chump change) and tells the flabbergasted man still nursing a broken wrist that he can call his office to talk damages if he dares

this is when Valaena decides to climb aemond like a tree

[ridoc]

quick teensy ridoc run down even tho i basically told u everything in the rules :

we don’t explicitly know how old he is, but given he started the same year as violet did, we can assume he’s 20-21 in the first two books ( 20 is the minimum age they can be to go to the college )

he’s very much the class clown, with (badly paraphrased) quotes about him such as “ridoc was easy to remember. he’d cracked jokes all throughout history”, and “at least it wasn’t ridoc [that you chose for second in command]. he would have seen it as a platform to crack more jokes”, and “i was sure ridoc would find a way to annoy the entire quadrant, not just our squad”.

there’s also “ridoc hadn’t even bothered to find the uniform tailor. he’d just ripped his sleeves off.”

uh, like i said, he’s an ice wielder. he … wields ice. it’s . pretty self explanatory

he’s described sometimes as being on the shorter and leaner side, and then once like, being described as taller and wider than another cadet so … idk man, go figure. he does pack on muscle tho from training

his dragon’s name means light ( as in, not heavy ) so i like to think that goes with ridoc being described as generally smaller

he only gets angry fr once in canon and it takes everyone totally by surprise bc they didn’t think he was capable of it tbh

thats all we’ve got! thank u for coming to my ridoc talk

[tortoisebore]

OH OH I JUST THOUGHT OF ANOTHER ONE how did they say ily to eachother? (who said it first? how did they both react? when?)

oh oh oh oh oh ✨🤲💕🥰💞🤩💖

i think there would be a big time jump between when they both individually realized they loved each other and when they actually said it

and there would be vicious ongoing debate about who actually said it first

sirius was head over heels obsessed from their third date, when remus brought him the little glass bird, and he secretly freaks out about the depth of his feelings for a month or so before he finally admits to himself that yes, he’s hopelessly in love with the biggest nerd on earth. for a second he’s like ‘how the hell did i manage to fall in love with someone that travels with slippers and owns more than three cardigans??’ but then he remembers the little bird on his windowsill and how pretty remus looks when he laughs and how he listens even when sirius is being ridiculous, and he’s like ‘yeah actually that checks out’

meanwhile remus knew exactly how he felt about six weeks in, when he’d called sirius after a shit day just because he needed to hear his voice, and sirius just went ‘literally come over right now.’ and remus was like ‘wait you have work super early tomorrow’ and sirius goes ‘okay and?? get over here’ and, of course, he goes. and when he gets there sirius is wearing that sweater remus thought got lost in the laundry weeks ago and his hair is tied up all messy and he’s so so so pretty, and he smiles all sweet and hugs remus close and goes ‘hi baby’ all soft near his ear, and remus is putty in his hands as sirius pulls him to the couch and turns on the sitcom they’ve been watching and lets him just…..sit. in silence. and they’re still learning and getting to know each other at that point but no one has ever learned remus this fast before, no one has paid attention like this before, and yeah he’s totally and completely in love with sirius, no question about it

so the next two months is just both of them trying really hard not to say it. remus is freaking out ab it because ‘it’s too soon, i don’t want to scare him off’ and sirius is freaking out because he’s never told a boyfriend he loved them before, and they’re both giant losers so afraid of losing each other that they’re kind of blind to the level of each others’ devotion.

a week or so after they’ve officially been together for three months, sirius is on the phone to james gushing about how remus found him a second little bird, this time just plain crystal clear glass, to go with his little green bird in the windowsill. and james is a good sport about it so he listens, and when sirius is like ‘i’m still so worried that i’m gonna do something and he’s gonna leave’ james goes ‘um no sirius he’s so in love with you it’s insane.’ and sirius’ brain just…..breaks?? and then immediately switches back on because 😦 ‘HE WHAT’

and the next four minutes is james trying to do some damage (and volume) control over top of sirius screaming about ‘when did he say that did he say that to you when was this where were you did he say that exactly are you paraphrasing tell me exactly what happened right now’ and james tells him that they were out at lunch with lily one day that sirius was at work and remus just…..wouldn’t stop talking about him. so james (being james) went to crack a joke and said ‘what are you in love with him or something 🤪’ and remus just kinda frowned and said ‘well, yeah’ all matter-of-fact and confused, like he thought this was common knowledge & everyone already knew

and james didn’t know!! he didn’t know remus hadn’t said it yet sirius please don’t be mad!!

and sirius drops his phone and grabs his shit and storms across town and bangs at remus’ door until he answers, all confused and on edge because it’s almost eleven at night, sirius, what the fuck is going on. and sirius just huffs and puts his hands on his hips and goes ‘you LOVE me?????’ and remus is confused for a second and then he goes white as a sheet. and sirius is tapping his foot and waiting, hello??? and remus is going to kill james, but he just sighs and goes ‘i was going to tell you, sirius, i just wanted to do it right—of course i do, you’re so fucking smart and you’re thoughtful and kind and funny and good and you’re the most beautiful person i’ve ever seen—of course i do.’

and then he gets absolutely tackled in the doorway, like it’s a really close call that they don’t both tumble to the hardwood floor & break something, and sirius is kissing all over his face and smiling so so big and saying ‘i love you i love you i love you i love you’ over and over and over and over

so now they argue about who said it first, because sirius technically said ‘i love you’ first, but remus technically said that he loved sirius out loud before that, and it’s an ongoing fight that their friends know to stay out of and that normally results in them leaving parties and outings early to go home and have fake fight sex with about four hundred too many ‘i love you’s to be convincing

[the1975attheirverybest]

Amelia arguing with George 😭

Idk how education will develop in future chapters but I need to know if Amelia has a girl friend that she's close with and she con trust to talk about her feelings, having convos like 'Amelia, I know that you're having fun and all of that but please protect your heart, things might turn weird in your friendship with Matty and stuff like that". 😭 I totally get why she got mad at G (a bit overreacted but fair enough) it's like how do you know I'm not able to separate my sexual encounters from my feelings, also you're a man, why would I listen to you?🙄🧐

HAHAHAHA. That cracked me up. To paraphrase Jennifer Anniston, “no vagina, no opinion.”

This isn’t toooo much of a spoiler cuz I might post the second half today, but George is going to end up having the same conversation with Matty about what he’s doing with Amelia. I’ll let y’all guess how Matty handles it.

she’s friends with Carly and Charli and Patricia actually! But, the truly sane friend in her life is…Ross MacDonald. An honorary woman. 🥰

[sonicthedestiel]

Tw sick pets; Rant tht couldn’t wait till therapy:

So my lil bb boi had complications after his neutering 😾

The surgery went well but he got an infection immediately

I’m 90% positive they cut too deep and cut into his little penis and the tissue that got cut needed to be passed as in pissed out

I’ve researched and researched, his condition happens about 10% of the time and its the only explanation that hasnt been eliminated other than “we don’t know why he’s bleeding ☺️”

Seems they can’t (won’t) tell me that without risking getting sued; so they lied

and also straight up forgot to give us one of his meds and if he didn’t have complications we wouldn’t have known that

He’s doing a lot better now I’m just so disgusted they did this to him and don’t even have the balls-the humanity to tell me that or apologize in any way

I can tell they genuinely care about the animals under their care but still so AHHH

Update: he’s in the ER

Surgery went well thank the gods. They got out most of the stuff.

Apparently his stressful weekend IS what did this to him.

(Paraphrasing) “Could’ve been the stress of getting neutered or if there were any stressors at home while this was happening that could’ve worsened his condition”

His weekend was very stressful and No One in the house respected or even cared about his condition

My partners mother invited people and their children over to the house for a grandkid visit because she’s old and sad

And genuinely didn’t give two fucks that maybe that was a terrible idea and could potentially make my little boys condition WORSE

But no don’t listen to me

“ITS NOT THAT BIG OF A DEAL”

“She needs to Chill out”

He is in the ER directly because of them.

I watched as he bled over and over and over BECAUSE they were being loud and obliviously obnoxious. Children screaming every ten minutes. Adults setting a terrible example of “it’s okay to have fun at the cost of someone’s suffering” being just as loud as the screaming toddlers.

Then to make it worse his cousin gets home and livens the place up.

So it got louder.

They got more disrespectful.

They actively turned their conversation into making fun of the fact that I consider this to be a crisis scenario

Yk the fact that he may need to be hospitalized at any moment

But no MNOIOO

that’s totally not a crisis

He’s totally not sitting alone in a age right now because OF THEM

It’s not like they were cracking jokes and making of a disabled person for having a sick cat.

No wait they were.

How do i look these people in the eyes after this

I’m gonna have to say Something

And I swear to god if they snap at me and start talking down to be for being autistic because they KNOW that’s the only way they can come out the other side with the upper hand.

But it’s gonna be okay he’ll be home soon and everything is gonna be okay

[loracarol]

I decided to read Fruits Basket Another, and aksjdf I really enjoyed it??

Some highlights (paraphrased because I turned the books back into the library yesterday oops):

Momiji's daughter knows Momo as "Aunt Momo", and Aunt Momo is loved/trusted enough to take care of her while Momiji is overseas, meaning that whatever else happened, Momo and Momiji figured out their relationship and know that they're siblings and care for each other and d'awwwwww

TBH all the second gen kids are really well adjusted? Like, the parents made a real effort to make sure that their children would lack the trauma that they grew up with and it shows!! It worked!! They're just normal kids!

The climax of the new character's emotional journey is acknowledging that she hates her mother (who is emotionally abusive), and she wants to escape as soon as she's old enough, and the second gen Sohma's are like, "yeah, bad family's are a curse. You should totally cut her out as soon as it's safe, you're valid and normal for that," which means that the first gen Sohma's raised their kids with enough love & respect & dignity that they know what their boundaries are, and feel secure enough to enforce them; even if the first gen Sohmas were bound together by a curse and trauma, the second gen kids feel safe rejecting staying with abusive family members because faaaaaaaamily.

Hajime🐱 (Kyo and Tohru's kid) talks about how Kazuma Sohma is his only "real" grandfather and as much as he (tries to) love everyone, fuck his bio grandad. Bless. In this house we believe in Kazuma Sohma supremacy.

Mutsuki🐀 (Yuki and Machi's) kid telling his mom and dad that he loves them and he's happy that they're a family because Yuki and Machi did such a good job of raising their son in a loving household. <3 <3 <3

Hajime🐱 and Mutsuki🐀 are close enough that the main character thinks that they're brothers at first. Awwww.

Hajime🐱, after being compared to a cat: "I'm not a cat, and I definitely don't turn into a cat when hugged."

Just... Hajime🐱. He has Tohru's all loving attitude + Kyo's whole.... Deal. He's also an oldest sibling, and has major Big Brother Friend / Dad Friend energy. At one point he comforts the main character like he would any of his siblings and then immediately runs away, embarrassed. He goes, "Ugh, I guess I'm your big brother now," "No one said you have to-", "no, I have to." Even his initial mistrust of the MC is because of how much he loves his younger family members. (It's plot related, and a little bit of a spoiler), and he apologizes for it. His younger cousins call him "Papa" as a joke because he's That Much of the Dad Cousin. It just cracks me up/makes me sad/happy when you compare how Kyo was treated to how his son is treated.

(Seriously, he comforts the main character, is called out for treating her the same way he would any of his younger siblings and runs away the nerd!)

[beesweatercas]

Here’s my take on the ending:

Since the start, Sam was supposed to be the Main Character™ , but since Jensen created Dean in such a beloved way, and later Misha did the same with Cas, the writers were forced to give them more attention. Jared was always displayed first in the credits, and Misha wasn’t considered a main character until like season 9 or something, so its clear who the showrunners prioritized. When Cas was killed off in season 7 the show’s ratings dropped by an outstanding number, so the writers scrambled to write him back into the script. Misha/Cas AND Jensen/Dean always had the hearts of fans, and the writers and creators didn’t like that because Sam was suppose to be The Guy.

There’s no way Misha “do what’s right even if it’s against the law, death to normalcy” Collins actually liked the way this ended. The fact that the cast never really gave Misha a proper send off, at least not publicly, like they did with every other character on their last day, is suspicious. Maybe there was supposed to be another Cas scene but Misha got into a fight with the writers. Who knows. I wouldn’t be surprised. That could explain why the episode is so significantly shorter than usual. And Jensen also said there was a cut scene from 15x18 that he didn’t know was cut until the episode aired. So it’s totally reasonable to think that a Cas scene was cut from the finale, possibly due to a dispute. Misha is clearly the most bold and imo its because he knows he doesn’t get paid enough to let the writers shut him up and knows that he can’t get fired because the show will go under if he’s killed off (ex: season 7 crisis) so he’s ranted about the show’s faults many times in conventions and thank god for that.

I was sort of shocked when I first found out that Sam was written to be the head honcho but it makes sense if you watch the early seasons because Sam is the one with the actual explained backstory, the “rebellious son”, the one who gets psychic powers, became soulless first, etc. Later, since people leaned towards Dean more, he got more elaborate plot lines, like the Mark Of Cain/Demon!Dean, the purgatory thing, and the whole Amara thing. And since people ADORED Misha/Castiel, they gave him soooo many story lines that weren’t the main ones but still were fantastic. They literally made Castiel God, he fell from Heaven and became human, and Cas was ultimately involved in a lot of turning points in the show. In my opinion Castiel is the most complex main character, and I’m not surprised that Buckleming and Dabb couldn’t handle him. Dean was supposed to be basic, but Jensen basically said “fuck you” to the scripts and used his acting skills to add depth to the character, and for that I literally cannot be more grateful for Jensen Ackles. Misha did the same thing but in a different way.

Andrew Dabb has repeatedly expressed his dislike for both Jensen and Misha. Jensen and Misha took the characters and made them their own, into something the fans LOVE, and that pissed off the writers because Sam was supposed to be the most beloved one and the complex one, Castiel was supposed to be a temporary character and Dean was supposed to be the dumb goofy one, and honestly I think it’s all just a control thing. The writers and showrunners had no control over Misha and Jensen. Which honestly? Is the plot line for Chuck. To paraphrase, Chuck basically said, “in all the other worlds, you did what you were supposed to do. In every other universe you played by my rules. But not you.” That was Chuck’s whole thing. ESPECIALLY about Castiel. Chuck said, about Castiel, “You know what every other version of you did after ‘gripping him tight and raising him from perdition?’ They did what they were told. But not you. Not the ‘one off the line with a crack in his chassis.’ All of you. You know, I tried and I tried and I tried, but you're all just too stupid, too stubborn. Too broken. You know what? I'm over it. I'm over you.” This is literally the writers reflecting their true selves. Chuck is literally them in every way. They made Chuck a writer in the beginning, and later revealed that he’s God, so......honestly, this last season was literally just the writers spewing their feelings onto the scripts.

(I’m not saying Jared didn’t put any effort into Sam, I’m just saying that the writers always viewed Sam as the main man so they probably liked him the most and seeing the others get more attention from fans was probably annoying. Sam is also a complex character, but he was always written to be that way. Dean was not supposed to be so complex, and Castiel CERTAINLY was not supposed to matter as much as he does. I love Sam, but this is what I think the writers/showrunners were thinking when they decided to screw over Jensen and Misha/Dean and Cas.)

(Also I’m not an expert, this is just speculation, but I think this is a pretty solid theory)

TL;DR: The writers (specifically, Dabb) didn’t like Jensen and Misha because they couldn’t be controlled and rose above Sam in many cases, and they used Chuck as a way to reflect that, and used the finale to basically send a big “fuck you” to Jensen and Misha.

[yallmakemyassitch]

*sighs and cracks knuckles* Welp. It's about that time again. I'll try to keep this one brief & get right to the point:

"Tabi’s is much more soft and consists mostly of chuckles, rarely than full blown laughter. If he is , his laugh is very loud and adorable (he’s quite embarrassed about the volume)" - Uhhh.. 'if he is' what? Was there something else you were gonna add to that?? Cuz I got confused.

"You can basically tell he is but the guy is too shy to answered. Tabi may be shy but is very firm of his boundaries" - remove the d and replace 'of' with 'in'.

"This however will occur if she does know you, she’ll answer honestly but will laughing, not exactly taking you seriously. " - I dunno whether you were trying to say 'while' or 'will be' here, but I think either one will be fine. 🤷‍♂️

"Ayana, is much more dog-like than usual, " - Dog-like?? Eh.. I'm not saying it's wrong necessarily (cuz I really don't know) but I've never heard that before so I guess I'm just confuzzled. But, I'll assume it just means being playfully affectionate in this case.

"Ayana is exhausted from the day and only wants to sleep, never really getting any lee or ler mood. But because of his boyfriend’s energy and bounciness, he wants to see her laugh and tickles her a bit. She’s always taken off guard by his sudden charge of attitude but never minds and enjoys the tickle fight at the end of the day, * both exhausted and sleeping in each other’s *, content and loving of one another." - Change 'his' to 'her' & remove the 'of', and I'm gonna assume you meant "in each other's arms". You could also say "until they're both exhausted and sleeping" before that.

"It’s not really apart * of their vocabulary and not often used. Depending on the context, they can role the lovely word off their tongue without a problem. But if in the context of * tickling, it fluster them quite a bit, specifically for only for Tabi." - Separate the 'a' and 'part' from each other cuz it gives a totally different meaning otherwise. I know meant to say 'roll' there. And in the next part, I think you can emphasize it better by saying "But in the context of actual tickling"

"Ayana loves to taunt! Not in a mean, disrespectful way but, in a sibling-esque fashion, pretending she’s the tickle monster about the get them and give them a plethora of raspberry once she gets them. " - That first one was a typo, use 'to'; "raspberry" should be plural also.

"For example, he points out small details and compliments her, * leaving her a blushy pile on his lap, giggling him to stop (he stops tickling her, much to his ignorance she was talking about the “teasing”) *." - For the sentence in between the pink asterisks, try saying something like this: "leaving her a blushy pile on his lap, giggling like an idiot and pleading for him to stop (and he stops tickling her, completely ignorant to the fact that she was talking about the "teasing")"

"Tabi laughter turns shrill when the areas of his sides and back meet are dug into. The back of Ayana’s knees is ticklish but not many people touch them. Many *had to learnt* he hard way not to touch them." - That's a plural word so use 'are' instead. I don't know if you were saying "had learnt" or "had to learn", you can fix it either way, and after that you meant "the".

"She squeezes the nearest surfaces and pounds her fist on it " - Just cut off the 's'.

"Tabi thinks she looks super cute when she sleeps but regrets it later every time after he realizing he can’t get up without waking her up and has to sit there." - I'm gonna guess you either meant "after realizing" or "after he realizes", you can correct it either way.

Okay, done now.

*Phew!*

(You know, if I'm allowed to share some advice, maybe you should try using Grammarly or Quillbot or one of those paraphrasing/grammar check sites whenever you write this stuff, cuz tbh I'm not sure if I can keep doing this. (Not that you were ever expecting me to anyway. 😅) It was lowkey a little tiring having to look through all that again.)

Nobody:

English teacher anon:

( I just thought this was really funny I'm so sorry )

The weird thing about this is that I proof-read my headcanons before posting.... apparently that wasn't enough to escape English teacher anon from their wrath. One problem that I have is that I get so excited for headcanons writing is that I end up spamming a bunch of gibberish, likely throwing people for a loop. That's my bad anon, I'll do better next time! Also you have no need to correct my mistakes, if you're tired take a break my guy, don't push yourself! (You can just say I made a couple mistakes and I'll go back to change them if that makes your English teaching job easier XD)

Anyways thank you, byeonara!