#(and if they pull that on us i'm going to need an EXTREMELY good explanation to go with it to justify that)
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Hi it's just to let you know that the official romanization of Revaan's name is Raverne ! Also they have romanized Baul's name to Baur !
Twst coming back at us again with the least expected romanization! thank you everybody (oh god my inbox) (no it's great, I literally asked for this and the reactions have been INCREDIBLE, thank you all!)
I do like Raverne though, I think it's got a nice fancy sound to it! (I had kinda suspected it was going to be an R instead of an L, so the fact that it's SO close to Laverne except for that is hilarious to me personally.) and Dragoneye Duke is honestly probably the best translation for his title, I wasn't envying the localizers that one. :') Baur instead of Baul I was NOT expecting, but in retrospect I think his name's supposed to be a reference to the Bauru crocodile, so that actually makes way more sense!
someone else also said Meleanor has become Maleanor, which is the REALLY weird one to me, because I was so surprised it was written as Mel instead of Mal in the first place?! oh god no I can't decide which one I like better. 😭 (I wonder if they might change it to Mal...they have made romanization changes before) (like I remember House of Distraction being corrected to House of Destruction in Playful Land) (I did check and she's still Mel for now, but I dunno, they might Mal her up and some point and save me from having to make a decision about which one to use) (HECK I CAN'T DECIDE)
uhhhh thank you for letting me ramble about anime names, let's just say MONOGRAMMED SWEATERS FOR EVERYONE
#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 part 4 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 part 4 spoilers#mel is so cute but mal fits with the rest of the draconias better#eng version no you were supposed to save me not make things MORE confusing#anyway raverne huh#that uh. that sure feels like it's supposed to evoke raven doesn't it.#what does it mean WHAT DOES IT MEAN#hold on i'm going to flail around embarrassingly about anime character theories now#(okay first a disclaimer: i do think we need to sit down as a fandom at some point)#(and have a discussion about exactly what is actual canon versus meta speculation versus jokes)#(because i think there has been. some confusion. over that re:crowley and raverne specifically)#(but i do feel justified in being like THEY ARE PROBABLY CONNECTED SOMEHOW RIGHT?! right now)#like i really don't think it's as simple as crowley being raverne but with memory loss or something#(and if they pull that on us i'm going to need an EXTREMELY good explanation to go with it to justify that)#they've gone out of their way several times now to make a point about them acting and sounding different and it feels very intentional to m#(and once again: i super 100% absolutely do not believe that lilia wouldn't recognize him with the top half of his face covered)#i just think the contradictions are a lot stronger than the connections right now but there ARE some connections and i'm 👀ing at them#to be fair the connections are mostly meta like crowley being diablo/raverne being evocative of raven#also the general 'raverne mysteriously disappeared and apparently had distinctive eyes' thing#versus 'crowley's past is unknown and he never shows his eyes'#(i will argue that crowley DOES seem to have some kind of canon connection to briar valley)#(since he is clearly some sort of fae and the masks are a briar valley thing)#and that is kinda it right now isn't it#okay hold on i had to delete some tags because i used too many (thanks tumblr for letting me know and not just vanishing them OH WAIT)#so tl;dr: i'm in the 'crowley is connected to raverne somehow but it's more complicated than just him being in disguise' camp personally#but that will probably change as we get more info and also don't take this as an anti-speculation thing because i love theories HOORAY
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Wants
Rise Leonardo x Reader imagine
Info + Warnings: Reader needs help wrapping gifts at the last second before a party. Leo's their hero. And a huge distraction. No gendered language, pronouns, or Y.N used for Reader. An attempt at Spanish by a very not Spanish speaking writer. Established relationship. Arguably steamy. Set a few years post movie.
Commentary: IDK what the fuck happened here.
See, here's the thing.
You are extremely, incredibly kissable.
He knows this. He knows this like he knows his swords are sharp. He knows it in his bones.
He also knows you have somewhere to be.
(Really, his motives were good. He came over just to help you finish wrapping your friend's birthday gifts (okay, and give you shit for only now getting around to it). He just wanted to be a supportive boyfriend and make sure you had time to get ready in peace.)
And yet, because he's either an idiot or an asshole, here he is, boxing you in at your table and kissing you.
See, the thing... you look really, really good. And you smiled at him when you walked out of your room, all dressed up and looking forward to the party you're going to and grateful for his help.
And he's only human- turtle- hm.
He's not immune, is his point.
So here you are, getting kissed, and his hands are on your waist and yours are grabbing handfuls of his shirt and he's very, very happy.
It's only when you gasp against him- his hand slipped, okay, he hadn't meant to squeeze your hip like that- and the sound makes his heart skip one beat and crash into another that he realizes- with all of the force of getting hit by a train- that he has to stop.
It's like cutting off his own arm.
But he does it, he pulls back- pushes back against every fiber of his being that wants to keep you close enough that he can almost hear your heartbeat- because you have places to be.
And you deserve much, much better than him being a desperate disaster against your dining table.
Now he's staring.
He's staring and his hands are still on your waist and your hip and he has to stop. Has to. Needs to. Like, muy rápido, right now, yesterday has to stop.
"...Hi," He says, voice all shaky and gooey through his grin.
"Hi," You repeat, a little dazed as you're still clinging to his shirt.
You're smiling at him again. He's not sure you ever stopped.
Shit. Fuck. He has to walk away.
He wants to keep you there for the rest of your natural lives.
"You gotta go," He mutters grimly, and he realizes how fucked it sounds immediately, and he throws himself into an uncharacteristically jumbled explanation because his brain is still offline. "It's late- you gotta- the thing- I'm- fuck I don't want to stop kissing you."
You cock your head as you process his messy babble, blinking twice, and then you're laughing.
And then he's laughing, because really it's that or take one of your butter knives and portal himself into the ocean, and if he does that he can't do this again.
"I gotta go," You confirm with a wry, bittersweet smile, not letting go of his shirt.
It's going to be so wrinkled.
He literally could not give less of a fuck.
"You gotta go," He repeats, more to himself than you, and you must know that because you're laughing again and you must really not care about... whatever urgent thing you have to go to... whatever that was, because you're not helping him stop like. At all.
You're gonna be the death of him one day.
"Maybe... you could come back by tonight? We could watch that stupid racing movie you've been talking about-"
"It's a heist movie, thank you-"
"-And, uh..."
"Don't say chill. I'll explode. I'll expire."
"I was trying to say cuddle," You say, bashful and exasperated at the same time, somehow. As though he'd ever say no. As if he knows how to say no to you. As though he ever, ever stood a chance.
It's beyond cute. It's enough to make him want to squish you and literally never let you go.
"You gotta go," He groans, his hands darting up to cup your cheeks and squeeze your face softly. "You're gonna drive me insane. What even is this again?"
"Birthday party."
"They'll have another-"
"Leo!" You laugh over his playful persuasion.
"You can send a card-"
"Leo."
"I'll pay for postage. I'll lick the stamp."
"Leonardo," You breathe, all fond exasperation, as though you'd ever let go of his shirt. As though you're any better than he is.
He almost wants to push just a little farther, see what else he can get you to call him.
He really wants to.
He wants a lot of things around you.
And even more when he's not around you.
And now, he's facing min-ee-mum four hours being not around you.
He hates it.
He takes the feeling and balls it up and three-point-shoots it into his mind's trashcan, because you deserve to go and have fun and be merry and all that jazz. He gets you to himself enough- never enough, literally never enough- that he can share.
Plus, he did a fantastic job wrapping those gifts.
And, as easily as he twists and leads and convinces other people, he's played himself right into a corner, because now it's both you deserve him being normal here AND his ego.
He'd be impressed by himself if it weren't for the fact that it means he loses.
He shakes his head a little, because he lost the plot minutes ago and you really gotta go and he's still got you against the table.
"Movie night?" He asks, just to hear you talk. He knows the answer.
"Movie night," You confirm happily, releasing his shirt.
He whines a little. He's barely even embarrassed at this point.
You laugh again and smooth the fabric out, hands warm on his plastron and making him a little insane again, before you press a kiss to his cheek. "Thank you for your help, honey."
"Thank me by making sure those are put front and center on the table, yeah?"
You glance at the boxes- done up in blue ribbon, you notice- and nod. "Art deserves to be displayed," You say seriously, and he's dangerously close to kissing you again because you're perfect.
"Yoooou-"
"Gotta go?" You finish with a knowing grin, eyes smug, head tilted playfully, perfect.
"Extremely, extremely yes. If you don't go I'm never gonna let you go. You gotta go."
"Hm..."
"Nope!" He says quickly, cutting off whatever tease is about to come out of your mouth, clinging to his sanity by half a thread. "Nope, nope, you are taking those boxes and you are going and you're going to have a great time and be safe and that is final."
"Are you telling me or yourself?"
Perfect. The death of him. Smug and clever and kissable and the worst and the best.
"Both, apparently."
"...I can be a few minutes late-"
"Baby, gorgeous, mi vida, if you don't get out of this apartment-"
You laugh bright and mischievous and delightful, and you press a quick kiss to his lips, and you scoop up the gifts and your keys ("You can port out, right?" "I think I'll manage.") and your phone and wallet and he grabs the door for you, because he's a gentleman (unwilling to be an inch farther from you than he has to).
"See you tonight," You promise, turning back to look him in the eye with more open affection than he was ready to see outside his own reflection.
"See you tonight," He agrees, knowing he sounds lovesick.
You leave, he closes the door, he slumps forwards to rest his forehead against it as he turns the lock and laughs breathlessly because his chest feels like it's going to explode from how much of it is just you.
#*writing#imagines#x reader#tmnt x reader#leonardo x reader#rottmnt x reader#aged up characters#leonardo#2018
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Just One Chance
ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ Synopsis: Senju makes a promise to wait for [name] before [name] moves. She's back after 10 years but loving Senju seemed to have backfired on her. Now, as she wallows in self-pity she is reunited with her ex, Mikey.
note: this is an alternate ending for my senju fic. you don't need to know the story but if you're interested you can find it here.
・❥・requests : rules
WARNINGS: MDNI, 18+, Smut, Oral Sex (f.receiving), Fingering, Squirting, Masturbation, Slight Somnophillia, Dacryphilia, Slightly OOC Mikey, Cringe Arguments, Manipulative Reader [she is very selfish], Non-Canon Couples, Drinking, Mentions Of A Foursome.
・❥・wc: 7.8k
・❥・masterlist
"Hey, [name]!" Hearing a faint shout from behind her, she turns around whilst taking off her earphones. She is met by Takeomi and a woman who were making their way through the airport crowd.
She also starts to walk towards them, her black suitcase dragging behind her.
As soon as she was an arm's distance from them, Takeomi pulled her into a hug. Despite cringing slightly, [name] couldn't stop her lips from perking up into a soft smile.
"How are ya, [name]?" Takeomi asks her, pulling away. She replies with a faint 'good' before Takeomi is pushed away by the woman who was beside him.
"Hello [name]-chan, it's so nice to meet you." The red-head woman offers a handshake which [name] accepts.
"Hello, Rika-san, and likewise. Again, I'm really sorry for not attending the wedding, I had crucial exams that week." [name] replies, maintaining her professional tone.
"Awhh, that's no problem honey, also relax, you sound so stiff!" Rika chuckles.
"I don't- this is how I talk." [name] says, tilting her head slightly.
"Damn, I'm still not used to you talking so politely, architecture uni really killed your attitude, didn't it?" Takeomi laughs out.
"Or maybe it's cause I'm no longer 17." [name] rolls her eyes.
"I definitely spoke too soon, the attitude is still there! Anyways, give me your luggage so we can leave already, I hate airports." Takeomi shudders and takes the suitcase from her.
"Honestly, you and your dislike for airports." Rika scolds jokingly but nonetheless follows her husband.
The ride home was quite enjoyable in [name]'s opinion. Rika and she kept chatting away, especially the former, but she did get questions about her job thrown at her which she answered happily.
[name] had worked extremely hard to get into this profession so, of course, she'll speak proudly of it.
After some time, they finally reached home. When Takeomi was pulling up the car, she noticed her brother, Wakasa, walking out the front door.
As the car halts, she immediately jumps out and goes to hug her brother, and he does so without any complaints.
"I missed you..." He smiles into the embrace.
"Obviously not enough to come pick me up." [name] rolls her eyes playfully. He grunts at her comment but smiles when he notices that she has started to become comfortable showing more emotions.
"Okay, come on, let's go inside. Freshen up, I'll prepare some food."
It had been a day since she arrived back in Japan, 24 hours yet she still hadn't seen the person she longed for the most.
Right now she sat at the dining table across from Takeomi and his wife, as Wakasa cooked dinner.
She was wearing a pair of comfortable shorts but was wearing a white formal dress shirt since she had just gotten off an online meeting a few minutes ago.
Not being able to contain her thoughts of the pink-haired girl, she confronts Takeomi about it.
"Takeomi-nii, where's Senju?" [name] finally let the question spill. Takeomi freezes. She also didn't miss how Wakasa momentarily paused his cooking.
"What..?" she asks hesitantly, her mind filled with awful thoughts.
"[name], Senju...she uh.." Takeomi lets out some incoherent babble not knowing what to say.
"Nii-san?" she turns to her brother this time who also froze up, not giving a proper explanation.
[name] immediately stands up and runs out ignoring her brother's calls from behind her. The cold air hit bare legs.
She doesn't pay mind to her shorts that keep riding up with every speeding step. She took in heavy breaths but didn't stop till she reached Senju's apartment building.
Finally halting, takes a moment to recover her breath. Entering the building she first checks the nameplates.
If [name] remembered correctly, the Akashis' flat was 703. And she was correct, except that instead of Takeomi's name, the apartment seemed to be owned by Akashi Senju.
PING!
She heard the elevator open from behind her. She turns to see a few people emptying out of the elevator, when it is finally clear of people she enters the elevator.
Pressing the 7th floor she secretly admires the interior of the elevator. She couldn't believe how much this building had changed over 10 years.
The elevator door opens up as it reaches the 7th floor and instantly walks out of it. Walking along the corridors she searched for the door with the number '703'.
Her eyes finally catch the said number and her feet move her towards it. Her vision slightly darkened due to her nervousness but still found the strength to ring the doorbell.
Immediately, she hears a few shuffles as a few footsteps grew closer to the door.
The door swung open as [name]'s face brightened at the thought of finally seeing Senju again.
Except, it wasn't.
Instead of seeing Senju's light pink hair, she was greeted by light brown hair.
"Yes..?" The shorter woman in front of her spoke.
"Oh-um...is Senju here?" [name] asks in a faint whisper, suddenly losing her voice, her head instinctively lowers to face her feet.
"[name]?" The other questions in a shocked tone. [name] snaps her head back up, taking a moment to realize who she is speaking to.
"Yuzuha?" She questions, her heart beginning to pound.
"Ugh, who is it love?" [name] hears a familiar voice, noticing how it had grown slightly mature.
The girl that she loved walked into the frame, her eyes widening at the sight of [name].
Senju sucked in a breath, shock embedded on her face as she stared at [name] with guilt in her eyes.
"Um, [name] please come in..." Yuzuha moves out of the way. [name] mindlessly agrees, taking off her shoes and walking in.
She was so stunned she failed to notice her actions.
"You both should talk, I'll be inside if you need me." Yuzaha gives a sad smile and walks further into the apartment.
Their lips were sealed shut, both were unable to start the conversation, that was until [name] noticed a shiny rock on Senju's ring finger.
"You're married?" [name] asks. Following her gaze, Senju lifts her hand and fidgets with the ring.
"No, just engaged." Senju replies with a quiet voice.
"Since when?"
"Just now actually..." Senju answers.
[name] closes her eyes, her head tilting back slightly as she accepts the reality of the situation. Her roughed-up appearance made sense now.
They were going to have sex.
[name] felt her throat close up, her heart frantically beating in an unpleasant way.
Oh, it hurts...
It hurts so much.
She only now realized how much pain Senju had been put through during their teenage years.
"[name]...I-"
"Don't." [name] interrupts her.
"It doesn't matter." She continues, releasing a heavy breath.
"[name] please-"
"Stop Sen-"
"NO, LET ME SPEAK!" The shorter female says raising her voice. [name] stills.
"I- I'm sorry, [name]." Senju's voice wavers as she apologizes.
"Sorry about what?" [name] snaps, her question coming out more stern than she intended.
"I- I-" Senju starts but is cut off when [name] sighs sadly.
"You're sorry that you moved on from me? You're sorry that you broke your promise that you'd wait for me? You're sorry that you're engaged?" [name] asks her.
Senju says nothing except look at the floor guiltily. [name] lets out another sigh.
"You found someone you love and makes you happy. You have nothing to be sorry about Senju." [name] says.
"Then why are you looking at me like that?" Senju asks, finally meeting eyes with [name]. Her vision blurred with tears noticing the [name]'s countenance.
"Like what?"
"Like you're disappointed in me..." Senju replies in a whisper.
"I am disappointed, but not at you. I am disappointed in myself because I let you down for so long. So if it's anyone that should be sorry, it's me." [name] says but Senju denies shaking her head, tears rolling down her face.
"Please Senju, you just got engaged. Please don't ruin such a happy occasion crying over someone like me..." [name] turns and walks closer to the door.
When she finished wearing shoes, a broken sob reached her ears.
[name] refused to turn around, because she was aware that if she did, she would break completely.
As much as she wanted to comfort her, [name] knew...
Senju was no longer hers to comfort.
"Goodbye, Senju." [name] says and walks out, pulling the door shut behind her.
[name] walked into the convince store hoping to buy some ice cream. As much as she hated sweets, she wanted something extremely cold.
She hoped to get a brain freeze while eating it, that might help to cool her raging thoughts.
Once reaching the ice cream section, she gets distracted by the alcohol refrigerator right next to it. Against her better judgment, her hand reaches for the sake bottle.
Five minutes later she was sitting on the pavement with two beers and a pack of cigarettes.
After realizing she didn't have enough money on her to pay for sake she decided to settle for a can of beer and a cigarette pack. The second beer came with the buy one got one free offer, a total steal honestly.
Although she was never a fan of drinking or smoking, the night called for it. She stands up and decides to savor the commodities in her hands at her favorite spot.
Reaching the rooftop of the abandoned building, she reminisces about the moments spent at the bowling area that was just a floor beneath her.
It was her and Mikey's favorite spot.
Oh my god, Mikey...
She hadn't seen him since that day, and honestly, she was glad. She certainly didn't have the courage to face him.
She sat down near the door, knowing she'll be drunk off her ass in the next few minutes, and wanted to avoid any accidents just because she couldn't cope with a stupid heartbreak.
She took out a single cigarette and placed it between her lips going to light it a bit then realized, she didn't have a lighter...
Letting out a grunt of frustration at her foolishness she places the stick back into the box. She clenched her teeth in anger knowing she just spent 500 yen on cigarettes that couldn't even use.
Despite wanting to chuck the pack away, she didn't. Instead, she held it close.
They were of Benson & Hedges, Shinichiro's favorite brand.
[name] sighs. This is why she left, just a day back in Japan and she's already depressed. She wished she had never come back, she was happy in the Philippines, but again, she couldn't just leave her brother behind.
She opens one of the beer cans and starts sipping from it.
Knowing that her alcohol tolerance was non-existent she only decided to drink just a bit, making sure to stay coherent enough to walk down multiple stairs and go back home.
But of course, God has never been on her side, has he?
Sips turned into gulps and within the next minute, she had already started sipping on the second can.
She didn't know if it was the slight anger towards Senju, or because she was here on the rooftop, but she found her thoughts slipping from Senju to Mikey.
She smiles fondly remembering how much this place meant to her, to them.
They had shared many firsts here. Actually, except for their first kiss, every other first happened here.
The first time they drank, the first time they tried to smoke, first proper confessions, first date, first 'I love you's, the first time they--
[name] cringed at the memory, she couldn't believe how reckless they both were at the time, but what did two 14-year-olds know at that time?
That's what love did, it made them feel like they were the only ones here, and it truly made them feel invincible.
Love is such a dangerous emotion for someone so young, but they both fell into its captivity without realizing it.
They say that an average person falls in love three times.
The first love. The type of love that happens at a young age which is frequently referred to as puppy love.
It feels euphoric at that time and being young and inexperienced doesn't make you understand what you truly feel.
As you get older, you think back to it and try to figure out if it was really love.
Mikey was her first love.
Then comes the second love.
It is said to be the painful one, it's the one that helps you grow.
It's said to come with a lot of pain, lies, betrayal, drama, and so on...
And although she was grateful Senju never put her through all this, she wouldn't deny that Senju was her second love.
Lastly, it's the third love.
It's usually the one.
[name] could only wonder when she'll find her third love.
It's said to come blindly; when your soulmate just walks into your life unexpectedly--
"[name]...?" A soft yet stern speaks from behind her.
[name] felt her heart drop and her breath got stuck in her throat.
Just when she was having an inner monologue about love he just had to walk into her life again, didn't he?!
"M-Mikeyy...~" [name] slurs turning to face him.
"What are you doing?!" Mikey raises his voice in shock seeing how drunk she is.
"Oh just thinking about all the times we fucked here, why else would I be here?" [name] smiles although in her mind she cringes, not believing she some something like that.
'I am never drinking again.' [name] promises herself.
"Come on, I'll take you home..." Mikey walks towards her and takes hold of her wrist.
"No! Come sit and d-drink with m-*hic* me~" She tugs him closer but he doesn't budge.
"[name], lets go." He says sternly once again, but she only shakes her head.
"No- come on just a drink, just like old times~" [name] pushes her half-empty can of beer into his face.
He sighs in defeat and takes it from her.
"If you insist." but instead of drinking, he chucks the can over his shoulder obviously not realizing how much force he used because it ended up falling over the roof and landing on the road with a soft clatter.
[name] gaped at him in shock.
"No! Why did you do that?!" She stands up immediately and goes to push him, only to miss and trip over her own feet.
Luckily, he stopped her fall. [name] looks back at him, only to realize she was seeing two of him, her vision suddenly blurred as she felt herself sobering up at the sight of him.
She finally got a good look at his face, and for a second the same feeling of love filled her stomach.
"Manjiro..." Her vision clears up and her eyes fall on the dragon tattoo on his neck.
Lifting her hand she traces the ink on his neck, slowly striding closer, and instinctively places her lips on his.
But to her disappointment, he doesn't respond and pulls away within the very second.
They both stand in silence trying to understand the situation. She was surprised by her own actions, the shock sobering her up completely.
She takes a few steps back and starts apologizing.
"I'm sorry, that was very out of line...that was definitely not fair to your girlfriend." [name] says, the words spilling out before she can stop them.
"Oh? So it's fair to me?" Mikey replies haughtily. [name] shakes her head.
"It's unfair to you too..." She looks away, unable to muster up to courage to look at him.
"Hmm, don't worry about it. Plus, I don't have a girlfriend." He replies.
"Oh, boyfriend...?" She asks.
"No boyfriend either, [name]." Mikey says.
"Then...why did you pull away?" She asks nervously looking down at her feet.
"Maybe because we're not together? Also, the fact that you're drunk?" He replies with a soft voice.
"R-right...also, I'm not drunk. I just got a bit tipsy and wasn't thinking straight, so sorry for that..."
[name] felt emotionally distraught, and Mikey didn't fail to notice that.
"Come on, I'll take you home." Mikey says but [name] just shakes her head.
"No, I don't want to go there right now..." She wraps her hands around herself to provide some sort of warmth.
"Then where do you wanna go?" Mikey asks; taking off his jacket and wrapping it around her figure.
Such gestures, it all felt so natural.
"You place...?" [name] asks hesitantly. Mikey sighs in disapproval.
"[name]..." Although he couldn't imagine leaving her so he agreed silently.
He took her to the Sano Residence on his CB250T. She was impressed to see how well he managed to maintain the bike even after so many years.
"I see you still live here." [name] smiles softly.
"This place has too many memories, I couldn't leave." Mikey smiles back.
"Is Grandpa in? I figure he's sleeping right now?" [name] asks.
"[name], he passed away years ago..." Mikey replies, his voice wavering. She looked at him in shock as this was the first she ever heard of it.
"What? When?!"
"A year after you left..."
"So, you've been living here all by yourself...?" She questions with a small frown.
"Pretty much." He replies and starts to guide her into the house.
It wasn't fair. He had been through so much, he had lost so many people.
His Mother, Father, Shinichiro, Baji, Draken, Emma, Izana, and His Grandfather.
And [name] left him as well...
"Why the long face?" Mikey brings his index fingers to the side of her lips and slightly pulls them up into a smile.
[name] giggles like every other time he did this gesture when they were young.
"Nothing..."
"Come on, tell me." he insists.
"I just- I'm not saying this is an insensitive way but, I feel like this house holds so many sad memories. I couldn't imagine being strong enough to put up with everything...does that make sense?" [name] rambles on.
"It's true, this place has seen such sad moments but at the end of the day, this house is a part of me. I couldn't imagine leaving this place. Hopefully, I'll find someone to make new memories here with..." Mikey trails off.
"O-oh...do you have someone in mind already?" [name] tries to keep her voice strong but a stutter manages to slip in.
"Honestly, I always thought of it being you..." he says with a sad smile.
"Do you still love me, Manjiro?" She brings up the courage to ask the question.
"Yeah...I do."
"Then why did you pull away?!"
"Because you don't love me back, [name]! You know what?! I am so sick of this! Even when we were broken up 10 years ago, every time you found yourself frustrated with Senju, you came to me. Ever since then you always kept me as your second option, and I hate that!" Mikey snaps at her.
[name] goes to defend herself but gets interrupted.
"Don't think I'm stupid [name]! I know exactly why you were drunk and crying just now, it's because you found out about Senju and Yuzuha didn't you? I was just trying to be a decent person and comfort you but then you went and kissed me, trying to distract yourself like you always do!
You did that before you left too! And I was so blinded by what I felt for you that I agreed with everything you did, not even considering the fact you were just using me as a goddamn stress reliever! Can't you see that what you did hurt me as well!"
Mikey's eyes filled with regret, he hadn't meant to snap at her but he had a limit as well.
"Manjiro I- I'm sorry that I made you feel that way...I didn't realize it I swear! At that time, running away always seemed to be the best option, but I never realized how many people I ended up hurting in the process..." [name] trailed off, her eyes welled up tears that she instantly blinked away.
After all, she had no right to cry.
"It's alright...I'm also at fault for leaving you like that." Mikey reasons.
"But you did that to protect me, to protect everyone. It's not the same. Fuck, I am the worst, aren't I?" [name] covers her face, tears burning her eyes.
"To be honest, yeah." Mikey's lips form a thin line. [name] scoffs at his reply but agrees cause it's the truth.
"But that's the past. Now that you're back, you can start over." [name] uncovers her face and gives Mikey a grateful smile. She appreciated his attempt to reassure her.
"Do you still sleep in your garage room?"
"No, I shifted to aneki's room, although it's still there. Here, the guest room is right here, you can stay here for the night." Mikey leads to the second-last room.
"Thanks..."
"No problem, you can take a shower if you'd like, although I don't think you need one. You smell quite nice." Mikey says before his lips seal shut.
[name] stares at him blankly trying to process what he said.
"Fuck, that was weird. I'm sorry, I just didn't think I'll ever see you again so my mind isn't working properly..." he explains trying to subdue his embarrassment. [name] stifles her giggles.
"It's alright, Manjiro. Good night." She smiles softly.
"Yeah, night. I'm just in the next room so shout if you need help."
[name] just nods and closes the door behind her.
It was around 2 AM when [name] found herself awake on the bed. Her mind was plagued by the thoughts of Senju.
Despite what her selfish heart asked for she knew Senju was just a star that she could never reach. A love that will never be hers.
She is distracted by the sound of glass clinking coming from elsewhere, so she gets out of bed and ventures out of the room.
Letting the sound of running water be her guide she traverses through the house and comes face to face with Mikey who had just finished rinsing a glass.
"Sorry, did that wake you?" Mikey gives her an apologetic look under the moonlight that seeps through the windows.
"Ah no, I was awake." Was all she said.
"Thirsty?"
"No...Manjiro?" [name] calls out to him.
"Hm?"
"Was it real for you...?" [name]'s voice comes out weak but her gaze does not falter.
"I don't understand." Mikey replies, confused by her question.
"Everything that happens between us. Was it real for you as it was for me?" [name] asks with a sad gaze, slowly coaxing him to answer.
"I think I made my feelings clear every single time, [name]." Mikey sighs, but then flinches at the sight in front of him.
[name]'s cheeks slowly got covered in tears as she finally succumbed to the events of today. Unable to stop herself she strides closer to Mikey and hugs him, words of gratitude falling from her lips.
"Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for loving me back then. For loving me now. Thank you."
Mikey holds her close while responding to her words with comforting pats on the back. Minutes go by and they remain the same. The flow of her tears were far from slowing down and so were her words of gratitude.
She very slowly pulls her head away from the side of his neck and moves her face close to his.
"Thank you." As the gratitude is whispered into the night, [name] connects her lips to her first love's.
This time Mikey does not withdraw, and only pushes closer, indulging in her taste.
Slowly, they guide their bodies to Mikey's room. Once the back of [name]'s legs hit the bed, she gently falls back before letting her back rest on the bed.
Her legs were spread apart for Mikey to move with ease as his lips continued their ministrations on her collarbone.
Pulling back to start undressing her, he halts to admire the love of his life.
Her lips were wet, small trails of moisture on her cheeks and neck glistened under the moonlight, the sight itself made him weak.
His hands work to get rid of her shorts so she's bare from the waist down spare for her underwear.
He doesn't remove the white dress shirt she adorned, instead, he unbuttons the first few buttons just enough to reveal the simple black bra that held her weight.
His right hand smoothly slid her bra up enough to expose her chest and the way he did so made it seem as though her breasts were trapped.
[name] lets a weak whimper escape her lips as Mikey's tongue slithered on the valley between her breasts.
His thumbs teased her nipples as his mouth trailed her collarbone. Slowly moving his mouth to one of her breasts he wrapped his lips around her nipple, using his tongue to add to the pleasure.
His tongue kept rolling around her nipple, saliva leaked from his mouth to the sides of her breast leaving prominent trails.
He couldn't get enough, feeling how her nipple slowly but surely turned hard. He continues to do the same to her other breast before placing his hands around her waist to flip her over.
[name] balanced herself on her hands and knees, letting out faux moans as Mikey's thumb rubbed her clit through the fabric.
Slowly pulling her underwear down yet not completely off, his fingers brush through her folds smoothly.
Mikey stares at her cunt with a blank stare. Somehow he wasn't surprised at the the lack of arousal.
His eyes grew pained yet a sad smile took over his lips.
He had yet again fallen prey to [name]'s false words.
Gathering some saliva on his tongue he slides it over her clit and her folds finally plunging into her waiting hole.
[name] lets out a loud hoarse moan, not trying to muffle her sounds like she usually does.
"Ahhh- There!"
[name] occasionally lets out words of affirmation as Mikey's tongue fucks her now-sopping cunt.
His teeth would sometimes nip at her clit painfully as a form of revenge yet [name] only found pleasure in it.
[name] continuously lets out moans unable to stop her approaching orgasm.
She couldn't deny that this was the best tongue to have touched her. The title would change every now and then while she was a student at uni.
Her best experience was during a foursome with fellow female students.
Her cunt clenches around Mikey's tongue at the thought, mind becoming hazy as she feels her clit throb.
She remembers how amazing it was. She was in the same position as she is now but her mouth was on an older's classmate's cunt, licking away at her folds.
She herself was getting her pussy kitten licked by two other classmates. One had her tongue constantly sucking on her clit to the point it was red and puffy.
The other would use her tongue to assault her insides, switching between her fingers as her tongue would kitten-lick her asshole despite [name]'s protests or she would engage in a sloppy kiss with the other girl, their tongues still coated in [name]'s arousal.
That was the last time she had a shaking orgasm, that was until tonight.
[name] had unconsciously started to push against Mikey's tongue, his wet muscle was long enough to somehow brush against her g-spot. His nose rested dangerously close to her other entrance, and she would moan every time it lightly touched her.
She pushes back harder as she slowly feels her orgasm fade, so she thinks of the only thing that could release all the tension.
[name] plants her face against the mattress and moans into it as she thinks of Senju in every position imaginable.
She did the same in all her years at uni as she would fuck anyone who remotely resembled Senju or sometimes Mikey.
She thought of how Senju's tongue would feel on her cunt. She imagined her cunt against hers, hands tied as [name] would ride her face.
Tears prick her eyes as the thoughts overwhelm her.
"SE—AGH AHH! THERE! PLEASE! PLEA- AHH! MIKEY!"
[name] squirts for the first time in 4 months. Her arousal coated her thighs, tainting the bedsheet below her.
Trying to ride out her high, she grinds her soaked cunt across his face in hopes of more stimulation, making sure to rub her clit on his nose and completely drench his face.
Mikey lets her move as she pleases, aiding her by softly licking up all her arousal.
As he finished, he places a small kiss on her clit before standing up to walk away.
Before he could get too far, [name] shifts to sit on her knees and stops him by holding his hand.
"Where are you going...?" [name] asks in a slight panic. Mikey only smiled down at her.
"Get some sleep, [name]." He replies trying to free his hand from her grasp.
"What...do you- why did you stop? What about you-?"
"This is enough [name]." Mikey loses smile.
"No, it's not- I need more! More than her- Mikey, please! Please..." [name] sobs guiding Mikey's hand between her thighs, coaxing two of his fingers to slide inside her.
Once they were settled in she moved her hips to mimic riding his fingers as she once did him, trying to lure him in. Her back was arched, pushing out her chest so they would move along with her hips. Her head tilted back to expose her neck, making it look so kissable.
Mikey was slightly caught off guard by her actions, never having seen her so desperate and submissive. He clenches his teeth in anger but keeps his mouth shut, only replying by driving his fingers deeper.
"Ahh! Just like that!"
[name]'s moans were music to his ears yet it made them bleed, knowing nothing was directed towards him.
"You're so fucking selfish."
Those were Mikey's last words before he rips his hand away from [name], completely distributing her orgasm.
"Manjiro what are you-?!" [name] exclaims but gets interrupted by the shutting of the door.
As a few minutes go by she hears rustling around the house she can see from the window how Mikey leaves the house looking fresh as if she hadn't just drenched his face.
He soon leaves on his bike, driving into the lonely night.
Tears now stained her face.
How could he just leave her? Who should she go to next? How else could she stop the throbbing between her legs that had yet to subside?
[name] falls back on her back, her head on the pillows.
She spreads her legs and immediately plunges two of her fingers into her weeping cunt. As she did so she was brought some relief, but her clit still pulsated against her palm.
She sits up slightly, her right hand still in her cunt and she leans against the head of the bed using her left hand to support herself.
Her left hand then moved to her breasts which were still trapped between her bra and her shirt. Her fingers stimulate her nipple as she continued to finger fuck herself, her mind filled with images of an engaged woman.
She imagined fucking Senju in her favorite position.
When she was at uni and became intimate with anyone who was similarly submissive to Senju she would fuck them in this position, hoping to do the same to her love one day.
Her room had a thin and long mirror on the side of her bed and there was enough distance between them to fit two people.
So as she would get eaten out by her partner for the night, she would make sure the girl would have her bare cunt pressed against the mirror.
She wouldn't stop the girl's actions until she was sure that the part of the mirror and everything below was covered in her arousal.
When it was, she would shift the both of them so that [name] was sitting on her knees and the girl was lying flat on the floor, her legs over [name]'s shoulder would rest on her bed and the girl would have a complete view of her arousal and her dripping cunt as it got fucked by [name].
[name] would then tease the girl with her tongue all night and she forced her to lick up her own arousal on the mirror.
The girls who had experienced this would cry and cry, the filthy actions would embarrass them but they would only grow closer to their release.
Sadly for them, even during these intimate moments, [name]'s mind would only replace them with a certain pink-haired girl.
[name] felt herself growing close to her orgasm when thinking of Senju in the same position.
But suddenly her mind replaces herself with the image and Yuzuha and it breaks [name]. Shaking her head in defiance she continues her actions nonetheless.
Her fingers started to numb and her arm started to hurt, but she didn't stop until she had released all over her fingers.
Letting her breathing slow down she brings up her hand close to her face to look at her arousal.
After she cooled down she let her forearm rest over her eyes, letting her tears flow.
Mikey hadn't felt such disappointed in years. As ashamed as he was to admit it, he was disappointed in [name] more so than he was in himself.
He had noticed how she had called him 'Mikey' as opposed to 'Manjiro' like she usually does.
It's something that she had started doing somewhere in between his Kantou Manji days. It had started when Senju had officially entered the picture.
Without even realizing it, he had played right into her hands. She would lure him with her sweet 'Manjiro's and her lips would only spill 'Mikey's as she would fuck him.
It was already too late when he came to the realization.
Everything was different when she loved him, and only him. It was sweet. And a part of him believes it all went to shit when he left, yet he atoned for his actions.
He was truly happy when [name] found love but when years later he heard of Senju and Yuzuha a part of him felt guilty, even though he hadn't done anything wrong.
Everyone else who was aware of [name] and Senju was also a bit distraught, but they were happy for Senju and Yuzuha nonetheless.
Mikey himself was happy for Senju for finding her happiness and hoped that [name] would be too but, by last night's events it was pretty clear how she had taken the news.
Because if she was happy, she wouldn't have kissed him. It had become second nature for her, if Senju does something wrong, go to Mikey. It had been drilled into her bones.
Mikey walks into his house at around 9 AM. He looked to see if [name] was still here and sure enough, her shoes were right there.
He goes to check his room and finds [name] fast asleep on his bed. Her back was on the mattress, her head leaned up due to it resting on multiple pillows. Her hands were on each side of her head, and her legs were slightly pressed together and folded up.
When he saw her face, he noticed how her lips were parted with small gasps escaping them, her face contorting as if there was some sort of tension building.
"Senju...Senju...~"
Hearing this Mikey's eyes unconsciously drift to [name]'s slightly exposed cunt, there was a prominent trail of her arousal leaking from her hole.
Against his better judgment, he finds himself yet again at the mercy of [name], hands on her knees to spread them apart.
He uses his finger to see how wet she is and is utterly surprised to see her completely soaked as he spreads her folds.
[name] lets out a pitiful whimper at his action.
Without another second being wasted, he sticks out his tongue and licks up from her asshole to her hole, gathering all of her arousal and pushing it back inside her.
[name] moans but doesn't wake, her lips forming the phonetics of Senju's name.
Removing his tongue from inside her, Mikey just licks her all over her cunt, trying to build her orgasm.
[name]'s eyes open but her vision is blurry, she just feels extremely wet all over and can only make out how her thighs felt to be trembling.
When she leans up and looks down to see Mikey eating her out, her head falls back and her cunt pushes forward on his tongue. Noticing her to be awake now Mikey goes back to driving his tongue inside her.
The loud squelching sounds slowly brought her out of her sleepy state, her hips starting to push against him making a few squirts spurt out of her cunt and onto Mikey's tongue.
"Ah~ Ah~ Mikey...what are you-?"
"Shhhhh..."
Feeling him speak against her clit just brings her orgasm closer. This all felt like a fever dream to her.
Mikey pulls away from making her whine but her mouth is agape when Mikey moves to her side and up to suck on her nipple, his fingers stimulating her soaking folds.
His tongue moved around her nipple along with his fingers and these actions were too blinding for her, falling into complete submission for the first time.
Two of his fingers suddenly plunge into her just as he softly bites her nipple, her head is thrown back as she moans out.
"Ahh! Senju!"
[name]'s eyes widened in horror, instantly looking at Mikey's face but his eyes remained closed, but she noticed how thin tears spilled from the corners of his eyes and fell onto her body, getting camouflaged within her sweat.
His mouth was still sucking on her mounds and the movement of his fingers hadn't faltered for a second.
In fact, his thrusting had sped up, hitting her g-spot repeatedly, she was sure her cunt would be puffed up due to the sheer force of his fingers.
"Mikey I—"
"Just finish, [name]."
And she does.
Her release coats his hand up to his wrists as his fingers reach knuckles deep in her cunt to coax out every drop.
This continued for a few minutes till their breathing was no longer erratic.
Mikey shifts once again to place himself between her legs to lick up all of her arousal, [name] remains silent ignoring how her cunt clenches around nothing as Mikey smoothes his tongue all over her folds licking her clean.
Once he is done, he places a kiss on her clit like he always does before getting out of the bed.
"Manjiro-"
"Take a bath. I have some clothes for you, freshen up." Mikey interrupts her before walking away from her for the second time.
"Where did you get my clothes from? Did you visit Waka-nii when you left?" [name] questions as she stands at the door wearing her shoes.
"Yes, I didn't think you had informed them so I knew they would be worried. I told them I found you drunk so you're sleeping at my house."
—————————
09:34 AM
"She's at your house?" Wakasa asks in a worried tone.
"Yes, I found her drunk and felt uncomfortable leaving her alone. I tried to bring her here but she kept fighting so I just brought her back to my house."
"Drunk?...*sigh* I see, thanks for informing me. You said you needed some clothes? Wait I'll get some for you." Wakasa replies massaging his head.
He returns a few minutes later, a paper bag in hand.
"I'm sorry about [name], Mikey. I wasn't too worried knowing she wouldn't do anything reckless, but just before you came here Takeomi called me and said that Senju and Yuzuha had gotten engaged last night."
Wakasa sighs out as Mikey's eyes widen in surprise as he thinks back to a few hours ago.
"This is enough [name]." Mikey loses smile.
"No, it's not- I need more! More than her- Mikey please! Please..." [name] sobs guiding Mikey's hand between her thighs, coaxing two of his fingers to slide inside her.
Once they were settled in she moved her hips to mimic riding his fingers as she once did him, trying to lure him in. Her back was arched, pushing out her chest so they would move along with her hips. Her head tilted back to expose her neck, making it look so kissable.
Mikey was slightly caught off guard by her actions, never having seen her so desperate and submissive. He clenches his teeth in anger but keeps his mouth shut, only replying by driving his fingers deeper.
He thinks back to how desperate and broken her mind seemed to work, and suddenly everything made sense.
He realized she had probably met them right after the proposal. He felt pity for [name] yet it was still not an excuse for her behavior.
"She didn't do anything drastic right?" Wakasa asks Mikey to make sure [name] wasn't too disruptive.
"Don't worry Wakasa-san, she fell asleep as soon as she hit the bed." Mikey replies with an uncertain smile.
"I see...Please ask her to come home soon. Thanks for doing this Mikey." Wakasa pats him on the shoulder walking back into his house.
—————————
"You told him I was drunk?" [name] asked shocked by the revelation. Mikey gives her a nod.
"He's going to murder me... You- ...You didn't say anything else right?"
[name] averts her gaze as she questions him.
"No, I just said you fell asleep as soon as you got to the bed." He explains.
"But..." He continues making [name] look at him in a slight panic.
"I don't take your brother for an idiot."
That was all he said.
[name] nods at him before finally saying everything she had decided to say while taking a shower.
"Manjiro, I'm sorry. I truly am. I was sorry all those years ago, I was sorry last night, and I will continue to remain sorry for what I have done. I have no excuse for—"
"[name] you don't need to do this-" Mikey's words interrupt her but it only makes [name] lash out.
"No! I have to. You deserve an apology, okay?!" His lips seal shut and [name] takes it as a sign to continue.
"I was really sad when I found out that Senju and Yuzuha had gotten engaged. Over the years Senju had started growing distant towards me to the point that we had completely stopped talking.
A part of me knew that she slowly realized that it wasn't worth loving someone like me, she didn't need to stay with someone who tormented her at every turn.
I was so depressed by the silent rejection that I would sleep with anyone who slightly resembled her in looks, personality, submission, or anything that reminded me of her. I would project her onto my partners and I unconsciously did the same to you.
I would try to stop myself by telling myself that Senju and I just got too busy, friends drift apart but when they meet it's left they never left. I would tell myself that it would be the same with us. That Senju would love me again when she saw me, yet it didn't go as planned.
Manjiro, It wasn't a lie when I said I loved you. I love you! I really really love you! But when Senju came into the picture I started loving her even though I never forgot you. I...
Manjiro, I'll be better! I'll go to therapy, anything! Anything to better myself. Just give me a chance... I'll be better so you won't ever regret having loved me. I'll make myself better so you don't have to be ashamed of me. Just give me a chance..."
[name]'s heart felt light as soon as all the words spilled out of her, but immediately a brick was stacked on her heart once again and she dreaded his response.
She told herself that no matter his response, no matter what he said she would accept.
"Okay."
[name] looks at him in disbelief. Did he just agree?
"Okay?"
"Okay. I'll give you a chance. But only when you can accept the true relationship between Senju and Yuzuha. Can you do that?" Mikey asks her.
[name] nods trying to compose herself.
"Yes, I can do that!" [name] assures.
"Are you sure, [name]? Are you ready to accept the fact that Senju no longer loves you? Are you ready to accept the fact that as we speak Senju is probably getting filled and fucked by someone who will never be you?"
By the end of the sentence, Mikey had pulled [name] close to him by her shoulders, making sure that her eyes stared back at his.
He knew his words were brutally honest, the last part might have been unnecessary but he could no longer ignore just how hurt he was by her.
[name]'s heart ached at his words but she kept staring back, not moving her gaze for even a second.
"Yes. For you, I will accept it." Was [name]'s response. Hearing this Mikey lets go of [name] and steps back. A few seconds go by as neither of them says anything, yet they don't break their stare.
"Very well. I will wait for you." Mikey finally lets out a smile, his heart grows heavy when [name] smiles back and bows as a thank you.
He watches as she turns around and leaves the house, closing the door behind her.
He already knew how fate works, and what it will do to him since god was never on his side.
He always wondered if he was being watched by the devil, and he wondered if he would keep looking upon him till he had taken everyone from his life.
[name] too wondered if she had a devil in her.
Being loved by [name] was truly a beautiful thing. But it would become dangerous if it isn't reciprocated. She would never directly hurt anyone, but everyone around her would end up in the crossfire and would get used by her to ease her.
Then she would think of ways revenge, payback in ways that would have her love come crawling back.
Even now, as she makes her way home the devil persuades her to forget about Mikey. He tells [name] to go find Senju and make her forget all about her fiance.
He coaxes [name] to find her and fuck her into oblivion. Make sure that [name] will always be the best tongue to fuck her, the best fingers to stuff her full, the best pussy she'll ever taste, the best sex she'll ever experience. The most loved she'll ever feel.
This was tempting for [name], but for now, she'll ignore the devil and only listen to Mikey. She will make him take the place of an angel or rather...
Make him a devil to kill her own.
#tokyo revengers#tokrev#tokyo revengers smut#tokrev smut#mikey x reader#manjiro sano#mikey smut#mikey x reader smut#sano manjiro x reader#sano manjiro#sano manjiro smut#mikey sano smut#mikey x you#mikey x y/n#senju akashi#senju kawaragi#takeomi akashi#wakasa imaushi#shinichiro sano#bonten#mikey fanfic#tokyo manji gang#toman mikey#toman#x reader#anime x reader#anime fanfic#anime smut#x reader smut
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Kissing Your Bruises
Ship: Greenflower
Characters: Lloyd Garmadon. Brad Tudabone. (References to Kai and other characters)
Type: Angst. Hurt/comfort
Warnings: aftermath of torture, discussions of violence, implied PTSD, mentions of panic attacks.
Word count: 1,570
Summary: Every Mission Lloyd comes back from leaves him more shaken than the last. Brad hates to see him so upset.
"You're such an idiot you know that."
The words were harsh on the outside, but the tone in Brad's voice conveyed only love and concern.
Lloyd returned from a month long mission extremely shaken up. He kept mumbling about how 'they' were going to kill him. The mission was over, Lloyd was safe. And yet Lloyd was almost reliving every moment.
Brad knew limited details. What he did know was that Lloyd attempted to sacrifice himself and ended up being tortured by a group of villains who wanted information out of him. Lloyd refused to comply, so they decided to kill him instead. The ninja intervened just in time and saved him. Lloyd had apparently asked to be with Brad. And now he was here, sitting on the small couch in Brad's apartment.
Kai had dropped him off, asking Brad take good care of Lloyd while he was like this, and giving him explanations on what occurred. Kai seemed hesitant to leave, but eventually stepped away.
Lloyd hadn't spoken a word at that point. It wasn't until Brad guided him to sit that he started speaking. He mumbled so many words. Brad couldn't tell if he was trying to talk to him or himself.
His eyes were wide and unfocused, face turned down towards his lap. He looked like he'd been sobbing. Bruises, cuts, scrapes, every type of wound covered Lloyd.
He was still in his gi. But it was torn in many places and stained with dirt and blood. His hair was disheveled and a tad greasy.
Brad had said that sentence more to himself than to Lloyd. He didn't know if Lloyd was even capable of listening.
He grabbed a spare change of clothes and a cup of green tea for Lloyd who was now curled up on his side.
"Darling?"
Lloyd glanced up at him, eyes still unfocused.
"Would you like me to patch your wounds and help you change? You can shower in the morning when you're feeling a bit better."
The ninja slowly nodded and sat up.
Brad pulled supplies from the small side table next to his couch. He sadly had to keep prepared dating someone like Lloyd.
Lloyd slowly removed his shirt and Brad observed the damage. It seemed like the deepest wounds were stitched and bandaged already, likely by the other ninja. Although when like this, Lloyd didn't tend to let the ninja treat what wasn't killing him. Brad took care of the rest. In worst cases, Lloyd took care of himself.
As gently as possible, Brad treated Lloyd's wounds. He used a warm damp towel to wipe off remaining dirt. And he got Lloyd into a fresh pair of pajamas.
He sat by Lloyd's side without a word. Lloyd made no move to speak either.
The silence wasn't awkward. It was never awkward between them.
Brad hadn't made a move to touch Lloyd. He had been through a lot and Brad worried he would trigger him into a panic attack or scare him.
He didn't need to move first as Lloyd laid his head on Brad's lap and wrapped his arms around his waist.
The ninja was shaking he noticed. It made him frown more than he already was.
"I'm going to touch your head, okay?"
Lloyd hummed.
Brad began to run his fingers through Lloyd's soft hair. It was dirtied from the fighting he had been through. Maybe he would wash his hair for him in the morning.
"Would you like to talk about it, hun?"
Lloyd opened his close eyes, his smile fading.
Lloyd spoke for the first time since he arrived that night. "I was so terrified I'd never see you or my family again. That I would let you guys down. If the mission failed I'd be dead and leave Ninjago without their sworn protector.
"You would never let me down, Lloyd. Obviously I don't want you dead, but you would die a hero. You have this whole legacy. You're doing something brave fighting for this island. Something few others have the courage to do. Sure I do my part, but I could never get out there and take action like you ninja do. You guys do something special. You put your lives on the line every single day. I know some people feel let down when you guys 'fail'. But I never will. Because I know how much you risk and give up for us."
"But what if...what if it's not enough?"
"You give far more than any person should ever have to," Brad said, holding in his anger. He wasn't mad at Lloyd. He never could be. He's mad that Lloyd has grown to see himself as this machine programed for war with no off switch. "Sometimes I wish I could shield you away from anything. Even if it took fighting in your place."
"Please never do that." Lloyd's words were rushed and panicked. "I don't want you to fight, I don't want you to get hurt. You have this chance to live your life with some semblance of normalcy. I can't ask you to give that up."
Brad sighed. "Then why can't you understand, Lloyd. Why don't you get why I am so upset you were turned into a child fucking soldier. "
"Destiny wanted me to fight, so I'll fight."
Brad knew there was nothing he could say to convince Lloyd otherwise. There was nothing he could say to prove to Lloyd he shouldn't have had to fight so young.
Even as Lloyd sat in front of him, battered and bruised, he still believed everything was as it should be. And Brad hated that more than anything.
He sighed and continued to run his fingers through Lloyd's hair.
Loving Lloyd so much only made him hate everything else. It wasn't fair for Lloyd to live a life like this.
"I love you, darling," Lloyd whispered.
"I love you too, my dear."
Brad leans down to kiss Lloyd. The position was awkward, but he made it work.
"Please don't scare me like that again, Lloyd."
"If only it were that easy."
Brad thought for a moment. "I think you deserve a break. Could I get you to agree to a week?"
"You're pushing it. Lucky I'm tired enough to agree."
"Ninjago won't fall apart in a week, hun. Plus there's always the other ninja and Samurai X."
"They're tired too."
Brad chuckled softly. "They can rest and you can't?"
"Would you be surprised if I said yes?"
"Unfortunately not."
Lloyd laughed weakly. "I'm so tired."
"Let's move to the bed and go to sleep. It's late and you've been through a lot."
"Nah. I'm comfortable here. Plus, I don't know if I can sleep."
He frowned. "Nightmares?"
"Everytime I close my eyes I'm back there in that cold room surrounded by people who want to see my demise more than anything."
"You can talk about it if you'd like. With more detail, I mean. You don't have to worry about me seeing you as weak. You're strong for surviving."
"Sometimes I think you can read minds," Lloyd laughed.
"Only yours," Brad said. "Here's the trick. Twenty years of knowing you."
"That makes me feel so old."
"You're a lot younger than you think."
"Easy to forget."
It was silent for a moment before Lloyd spoke.
"I don't know how I always get kidnapped. You'd think I would be great with knots by now." He tried to lighten the mood. The topic was too heavy.
Lloyd let out a shaky breath. "They were trying to torture me into revealing our plans. And they wanted to know the ninjas locations. Eventually they realized that I wouldn't budge and decided instead to lure the ninja to them. And they decided that they wanted to kill me so when the ninja showed up they realized they were too late. They'd find me dead and end up killed themselves."
Brad stayed silent as he listened. Lloyd didn't want words, he wanted to be heard.
"They chose to let me bleed out slowly. Didn't cut anything important. But cut enough that I'd be a goner if the ninja weren't there in time. Luckily they underestimated how sneaky ninja are. They made it in plenty of time. Choosing to let me die slowly backfired. I was easily saved."
"You were still badly damaged."
"Could be a lot worse."
He was right, it could be and has been. That doesn't mean it wasn't bad. That doesn't mean it's okay for Lloyd to suffer.
"Are they in Kryptarium? Darkleys did teach me the art of revenge. I'll find them."
Lloyd laughed. "That information is classified I'm afraid."
No longer attempting to lighten the mood, he got serious for a moment. "Just know that I can't stop you from going out and getting hurt. But I will always be here for you in the aftermath. I'm always here for you, my love."
"I love you so so much," Lloyd said breathlessly. "What did I ever do to deserve you?"
"Nothing. You didn't need to do anything. You did save the entire world countless times, I guess."
Lloyd laughed. "I love you."
"I love you more."
"Don't start that. You know I love you more."
"Hmmmm, I think you're wrong about that."
"Bradley..."
"Okay, woah, full naming is crazy."
"Bradley Tudabone, I love you more."
"If that's what you want to believe, Lloyd Montgomery Garmadon."
#fanfiction#fanfic#angst#lego ninjago#lloyd garmadon#ninjago#lloyd ninjago#ninjago lloyd#brad tudabone#ninjago darkleys#ninjago brad#greenflowershipping#ninjago greenflower#forgivenshipping
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Never Lose Me snippets
In honor of my Post-Rumbling Fic being completed, I wanted to put together some of my favorite moments/snippets from each chapter because I love it so much and I've become extremely attached to it. This is probably some of my best writing and I'm super proud of it. This is only the first ten chapters and I'll probably make a part two, just so this isn't ridiculously long.
Warnings/tags: mentions of suicide in chapter one's snippet. Postpartum depression implied in Chapter 10's snippet. This is a f!reader x reiner fic, the story is centered around Reiner creating a building a family with you post-rumbling.
Chapter One: A journal entry from one of Reiner's journals after he attempted, something you were unaware of and stumbled upon:
"I can’t stand to look at myself in the mirror, want to vomit when I catch a glimpse of what I am, who I was and what I’ll never be. I don’t deserve anything, I deserve to die, rot away in a nameless grave for all that I’ve done. I’m not a good person, I’m the epitome of everything opposite.
I should be dead, I don’t know why I hesitated on blowing my head off. I guess it's because I couldn’t get her face out of my head, her eyes and how’d I rip everything she holds dear if I went through with it. An early death wouldn’t be so different from when I pass on the armor, I can’t be with her forever. Then again that’s what I deserve. She deserves better, deserves a man who doesn’t recoil at his own image and cries himself to sleep as memories flash repeatedly at night.
I can’t allow myself to be selfish anymore, even if I so badly want to spend the rest of my life with her, as unrealistic as it sounds. She’ll live to old age and I’ll die at 25 and become nothing but a faded memory to her. I have so many regrets, more than I can count on two hands, but I think my biggest one was going through with the warrior program and signing my life away when I could’ve spent it with her.
I’d give anything to wake up next to her in our own house, with kids running around in the early morning begging for us to get up and make them breakfast. I’d fucking break through wall Maria all over again if it meant I could have that.
I’ll love her till my last breath even knowing her love for me will fade over time. "
His reassurance after you stumbled upon the journal and read what he wrote: "Reiner could see the hurt written across your face and saw how you took his explanation. Even if you knew just you alone wouldn’t be enough for him to mend the wounds that were his trauma, it hurt hearing how he wanted to give up. You were glad he didn’t but it stung as if he did.
“Hey look at me.” Gently guiding you back to face him, thumbs brushing away the stray tears that ran down the old ones dried to your face. “If it weren’t for you and putting so much faith in me I wouldn’t be standing here in this kitchen. You’ve been the grounding force all my life, my reason to keep going, my reason to be better than who I was. I owe you who I am right now and I thank the universe every single day that we crossed paths, everyday sweetheart.”
The tremble in your bottom lip increased by a ten fold, allowing yourself to go limp in his hands for him to catch you, wrapping you in the familiar embrace that was him. You needed him as much as he needed you, bound together smoothly and seamlessly to always be the salve to each other's wounds, the reminder that it will get better.
Time carried on in the kitchen, calming yourself in his arms with your face pressed to his chest. There was no urgency on his end, allowing you all the time to let everything out. When you pulled away, he smoothed the sides of your face from any remaining tears, pecking your lips."
Chapter Two: Proposing to you.
"His hand came to cup the side of your face, turning you in for a kiss. You smiled into it, placed your palm on the nape of his neck and stood on your tiptoes to meet him properly. The kiss turned into several, languid and deep, all laced with the love so strongly intertwined into your beings. Reiner pulled away, pecked your lips twice more and embraced you.
“You are my everything, my other half.” Pulling away, running his hands up and down your arms. His adam’s apple bobbed in his throat, words he wanted to speak turning his throat dry with emotion. “I can’t ever tell you how happy you make me, how lucky I am that my love for you wasn’t unrequited. You are my angel, sent to me when the universe knew I needed you most, without you sweetheart I wouldn’t be standing here, sharing this moment with you.”
He smiled bashfully, pulling his arms away and shoving one of his hands into the pocket where the ring box was, clutching it tightly. He warmed under your expression to his words, the soft smile creasing your red cheeks. Ignoring the constant flipping of his stomach, the dryness in his throat and sweat beading on his neck, Reiner began again, lowering down to one knee. Instantly you gasped, hands over your mouth and your body shaking with near instant tears that hadn’t fallen yet.
“From the moment I met you on that sidewalk in Liberio, when I was ten years old I knew I had to find some way to make sure you would be in my life. Even when I thought I wouldn’t live to see thirty, I still wanted to marry you, wanted to share a life with the woman who became the other half of my heart.” His voice shook, laughing cumbersomely and finally bringing out the ring box from his pocket.
You were sobbing before him, stifling your tears of happiness as best as you could. Reiner’s entire body trembled as he fought to find the next words to go along with the famous four.
“There is nothing else in this world that I have ever been so sure of, what was once a hopeless dream that I knew I had to make a reality when I was given a second chance, a second chance with you and to make the most of this life and cherish you like you deserve.” Pausing, Reiner blinked the few tears that escaped, opening the top of the box to reveal the ring he spent so much of his time fussing over.
“Which is why I brought you out here tonight, to ask you a very important question sweetheart. Will you marry me?”
Chapter Three: His Doubts on Fatherhood:
"Saying that outloud was a lot for him at that moment, a vague statement that held layers upon layers beneath it. Reiner knew his most inner insecurity was failing as a partner and now add father to that list and he was a mess with unrationalized thoughts about what could or couldn’t go wrong. Not having a dad growing up and seeking out said father and finding out he had nothing to do with him rewired him that day. Reiner didn’t want for one second that his future son or daughter felt unwanted by him, to not see the lengths he went to to make sure they were loved and cherished by him, that they were all he could’ve asked for. He knew the nursery not being done when they arrived wouldn’t matter to a newborn baby, but it mattered to him.
“Why’s that?” Came your tentative voice, one of your hands resting over his hand and your thumb rubbing soothing circles on the inside of his wrist.
“Because I want them to feel appreciated and wanted before they arrive, to know that I want them in my life and that I’m excited to be their dad. I know a newborn baby isn’t going to know or comprehend any of that so I guess it’s more for me, to make up for what I didn’t have.”
He wanted to cringe at how selfish that sounded, but he was telling you the truth. This baby would never experience what it felt like to be unwanted, to go to the farthest lengths to earn approval from him. Reiner would die before he ever allowed his children to feel an ounce of what he felt growing up. Finishing the nursery may have been seen as something not as important to anyone else, but to him it was the first step to being anything but what his mother and father were to him.
“Reiner. This baby is already so loved. I know how important all of this is to you, but I feel like you’re trying to prove something to me as well, which you don’t have to.”
Tears were burning at the corners of his eyes, blinking rapidly so he wouldn’t embarrass himself over crying in the kitchen over old buried trauma. Frustration simmered inside him often when he felt the weight of old wounds resurface after so many years, so sure that he’d healed from it at this point. Even with your constant reminders that healing was never linear and that it was okay, Reiner at times felt pathetic for letting it affect him like it did.
“I just want to be a good dad, I’m scared that I’ll get in my own head and fail and be like my dad and I don’t want that. Even though I’ve wanted kids and I’m so excited, it’s overwhelming sweetheart.” A thumb came to brush the tear that slid down his cheek, inhaling a shaky breath and shuffling his weight on his feet. Reiner hated that this was overwhelming when it’s all he’d ever wanted. Grappling with new emotions and situations was never his strong suit and he hated that about himself sometimes, he wished it were easier to carry the stress of an impending arrival such as this one, but by god he was overwhelmed and scared and channeling that into working and finishing the nursery along with various other things for you and the baby.
Chapter Four: After his daughter is born:
"A quick glance over to him and Reiner was crying, holding Maisie just under his chin and repeatedly kissing the crown of her head. Her fists were curled tightly to his shirt, holding onto Reiner as if she knew it would comfort him. Seeing your fiance so emotional at such random had the all too familiar lump forming in your throat.
“I’m sorry - it just feels like I’ve been dreaming, that I’m going to wake up back in warrior barracks in Liberio.” Choking out on a whisper, tipping his head back so the tears wouldn’t roll down his cheeks too quickly. A smaller hand that belonged to you, landed over his that was cradling Maisie to his chest, offering your presence. “I don’t know why I’m having the sudden realization now that this is real when she’s six weeks old I- fuck sweetheart this is real right, I’m not going to wake up.”
A quiver began in your bottom lip hearing the plea in his tone, like he was so afraid this would all fade from existence, slip from his fingers as he tried to hold on. Forming the words of reassurance were a struggle, mouth running try as you mouth silent words to a response. That seems to prompt a further reaction from him, blinking rapidly and forcing a smile, pulling you tighter to him.
“Yes, this is…this is real Reiner, you're not going to lose this. You’re going to wake up in your bed in the home you built, next to me and next to your daughter.” Finally managing to say a few words, though your voice was so strained from keeping the tears at bay you feared he might’ve not heard you.
His head bobbed in understanding, pressing his lips to the crown of Maisie’s hair and squeezing his eyes shut. What once was a broken, scarred man who convinced himself he was worthy of nothing but an early death, sat beside you a man who couldn’t be more grateful for the life he had, the life he swore would never come to fruition. Reiner inhaled sharply, lifting his head up and back to take in a few deep breaths.
“I mean it when I saw you’re the greatest thing that’s happened to me, you’ve given me a family sweetheart, made me a father and will make me your husband. You and Maisie are my entire world, my entire purpose.” His hand came to cradle the back of your head, looking at you with glossy eyes that swirled with endless amounts of love and appreciation for the impact you had on his life. Tears were falling down both of your cheeks, Reiner wiping the one he could with his thumb and letting out a few laughs, amused that his uncontainable emotions were bringing you both to tears. Maisie remained unfazed on his chest, sleepily blinking back at you, bringing a tender smile to your lips.
“I’d choose you all over again if I had to, every single time sweetheart.” Sealing his words with a tentative kiss, allowing it to linger even if it was only meant to be short, swiping his thumb over your cheek once more for added adoration. Your hand wrapped around his wrist, bringing it to you so you could plant a kiss on his palm."
Chapter Five: A conversation you had with Pieck about her grief post-rumbling and planning for a wedding:
“Perfect, she can help us with the wedding planning, maybe wait till she’s old enough so she can be a little flower girl.”
Warmly you smiled at Pieck, touched that she wanted to involve Maisie in her wedding. She’d make the cutest flower girl for sure, steal the show from the new couple by accident, but Jean or Pieck wouldn’t care, Maisie couldn’t help it.
“How is the wedding planning going?”
“It’s…it’s a work in progress. Jean and I are so busy half of the time there’s barely any time to discuss. I know he for sure wants to try and have it back in Paradis.”
“Really? How do you feel about that?”
A shift in emotions crossed her face, weakly giving you that somber smile. Pieck was guarded, a lot more since the rumbling, losing everything like everyone else did, but also losing so much more at the same time.
“I’m really not sure. His parents are back in Paradis so of course I understand that, but my dad is buried here and so is…everyone else.”
Your heart clenched, remembering the day you attended the small funeral for Mr.Finger and not too long after helping with the small grave sight for the friends who never got to see the end of the war. Marcel, Porco, Bertholdt and Colt all had headstones made in commemoration, not too far from the town hall. Reiner, Annie and Pieck visited often, as did you before Maisie. Though small and something dear to the four of you, the gesture and connection was there.
“I’m sure Jean understands.”
“I haven’t mentioned it.”
“Pieck…”
She sighed, tapping her nails on the table and looking around the cafe. You had a feeling you knew why she hadn’t mentioned it to Jean, the almost relationship she had with Porco and the time it took for her to accept his death. Like Reiner, there was a weight that crashed down after the rumbling, the weight of losing everything and realizing you'll never get to see some people ever again.
“I know I should, but I don’t want him to take it the wrong way.”
“How would he take it the wrong way?” Questioning her gently, careful not to pry too much into her relationship. Maisie smacked at the table, innocently unaware of the heavy emotions hovering between you and Pieck.
“I don’t know, I’m probably overthinking this. I just wanted to get married here, because… I want our friends to see us get married.”
Anguish of a different kind came over you, reaching for Pieck’s hand and lightly squeezing it. The tonnage of losing people you considered family would never go away, shadowing over happy and joyful events that were intended for celebration. You felt a little bit of it after Maisie was born, wishing Bertholdt were here to meet his best friend's daughter. Reiner never said, but you knew.
“Talk to Jean about it, it’s your wedding too and I have a strong feeling he’ll understand and the two of you will come to a compromise.”
The small signature smile came from her, nodding softly and squeezing your hand back finally."
Chapter Six: the aftermath of your daughter turning one:
"When he returned, you waited for him, curling into his chest when his arms came around you. The attempts to lull you to sleep with the gentle motions of his hand rubbing up and down began to work until you shifted and reached for your book. Instead of grabbing it from the drawer of your nightstand, your fingers grasped the soft fabric of something, pulling it out to reveal the baby blanket you brought Maisie home from the hospital in. You’d put it in there a long time ago so you’d never lose it, a small keepsake from when she was a newborn.
Bottom lip trembling seeing how small the fabric was, instantly reminding you that at one point she was that small. You sniffled and let out a sob, clutching it to your chest and curling back into Reiner. He called your name repeatedly, confused by the sudden turn around of events.
Finally, looking at him through the tears you spoke.
“She was so little, Reiner she was so little. What happened?”
Unable to see the relieved smile on his face as you’d buried yours in his chest, Reiner bit back the little chuckle and squeezed you close. He held you while you cried, the emotions of your baby turning one crashing down all at once. If you knew all it took was looking at the blanket she came home in, then maybe you would’ve done this earlier, get all the emotions out beforehand.
Pulling you away, Reiner wiped your tears and let out a sigh. His face read of endearing smugness, the kind when he knew eventually all your worries would be solved. Part of you felt as if he was simply waiting for a moment like this, knowing it was bound to come.
“Do you feel better?”
“No?! Our baby is one, I feel sick.”
He laughed then, hauling you into his lap and using his hand to tuck your head under his chin, rocking you as if you were Maisie, which actually turned out to be kind of soothing.
“It’s only going to get worse from here.”
“Thanks, I feel so much better.” Sarcastically sniffling, rolling your eyes even if he couldn’t see.
Kissing the top of your head, a mischievous chuckle rumbled in his throat, already knowing he was just going to continue to add on.
“She’ll start talking in full sentences. Eventually waking us up in the middle of the night to crawl into bed with us.”
“Stooop.” Whining on top of him, purposely interrupting his ramblings for the sake of your emotional stability.
“Then she’ll be begging you to put bows in her hair, braid it and style it how you want. Insist on following you around everywhere, turning into a mini you.”
“She’s already growing so fast, she walked for the first time all by herself today.”
Unable to help the small sniffle and tears once you remember Maisie hit another milestone today, Reiner paused for a moment, bringing you up to look at him. His eyes were misty, the attempt to pester you backfired.
“Yeah, but she’ll always be our little girl, our Maisie.” Whispering and fighting the tremble in his bottom lip with a weak smile.
Thumbing over the quivering lip, you pressed a small kiss to his lips, curling back into him with your face pressed into the side of his neck."
Chapter Seven: Yours and Reiner's wedding vows.
Reiner's to you: "Instead of reaching for the cards stuffed in his pocket, his head dipped in one final composure of his emotions before looking back up to meet you in the eye.
“From the moment I met you sixteen years ago it was love at first sight, even if ten year old me didn’t exactly know what that was, I can guarantee it was. When I had to leave for Paradis the first time all those years ago, I promised myself I would make it back, not for Marley or the brass but for you. I didn’t have a grasp on why my heart yearned for you all those years away, but I finally understood when I saw you standing there on that dock, meeting me in each other's arms.” His voice shook further and further with every word he spoke, noticing the two tear stains on your cheeks. Sucking in a deep breath, Reiner kissed your knuckles and continued.
“You didn’t have to care for me the way you did when I returned, didn’t have to reassure a broken man who saw himself so unworthy in his own eyes, didn’t have to stay up late with me all those nights when I couldn’t sleep, but you did. You showed me unconditional love and understanding after five years apart, never judged when at the time that was all I felt deserving of. You mended the broken pieces of my heart and soul with your attentive care, brought the light back into my dark life, helped me push through each day. You were my second chance at life, my reason to keep going even when I thought living to my thirties was never going to happen. So when I saw you again in Fort Salta, I promised myself to be the man you deserve, be the father our daughter deserves, because there aren’t enough words to express how much I love you, how much you mean to me and how you shape this heart of mine, I never want to leave this world without saying I love you.”
Yours to Reiner: "The faint sniffles from the friends and family watching on was nothing but a buzz in his ears, training his eyes on yours and watching the emotion swirl. Reiner kissed your hands one last time, holding them between your bodies and waiting for you to speak. When you were composed enough, you let out a little laugh with the tremble in your lip.
“Crossing paths with you changed my life forever, even if our first encounter was brief. I will admit I never understood the infatuation you had for me, why you pestered me endlessly and always ended up by my side. When I dropped out of the program, I was scared I wouldn’t get to see you again, but of course you made it a point to walk with me to and from the headquarters, even if it potentially made you late to training. I realized my crush for you right before you left, feeling so blindsided and wondering if I’d ever get to see the bright blonde boy who loved to point out the butterflies on our walks home again.”
Your hands shook in his, Reiner quickly seeing the turn of your emotions for what you were about to say next, bracing himself for the tears that were building in his waterline and the lump rising in his throat.
“When you did return, I was so happy to have my best friend back, so excited to mess around like before you left, but I realized that boy was buried deep inside you. I knew you weren’t lost completely even though some nights spent in your apartment I questioned if there was a light at the never ending tunnel. I never had any concrete reasoning for staying by your side when you returned, just wanting you to be okay and scared I would lose the one person who made my heart flutter when I saw them. I know you feel as if you’ll never truly be the man I deserve and I want to tell you that you’re wrong. You’ve always been a man worth loving, a man worth a life full of happiness and health, worthy of a family and friends who see you for who you are. You’ve always been the other half of my heart before I even realized it and I could live a thousand lifetimes and still not be able to tell you how much I love you.”
Chapter eight: Yours and Reiner's daughter feeling her younger sibling kick for the first time.
"Smiling at the following question, Maisie crawled over your leg to get to Reiner, climbing onto him like a tree and poking next to the corner of his eye. You watched as he praised her for the correct answers and the gentle correction at the wrong ones. Reiner went over the features of his face until he started to point to different ones and wait for her to respond. And Maisie did flawlessly, still working on some of the pronunciations but both of you knew what she was trying to say.
“Baby.”
Your daughter had rotated her head in your direction, pointing at your stomach. Reiner shared a look of awe with you, neither of you had mentioned that often there was a baby in your stomach but Maisie knew and both of you were a little shocked to say the least.
“That’s right, there's a baby in Mommy’s tummy.” Patting the center of your abdomen as you confirmed her observation. Even though Maisie had just pointed it out, she looked a little perplexed, moving to sit between you and Reiner, staring at your stomach.
Lifting the hem of your shirt until the small bump was revealed, you rested your hand at the crown, watching your daughter's eyes widen in even more fascination. Like she was scared something was to happen, Maisie reached her tiny hand out and rested it on the side of your stomach. Eyes blinking so slowly as her mind turned with pondering, working out the complexities of your pregnancy that she now suddenly became aware of.
A flutter rippled under your hand, barely noticeable at first but when the action repeated your eyes widened. If you were correct, the baby just kicked for the first time, and patiently you waited to see if they would do it again.
“Reiner.”
“Hm?” Taking his eyes off of Maisie to see what you wanted, having to balance his weight quickly as you grabbed his wrist to place his hand where yours was. At first he questioned what you were doing until he felt the tiny kick. The air in his throat hitched, body completely frozen as he waited for the baby to do it again. Maisie had been watching you two, not sure why your eyes were wide and bodies so still, so she moved her hand next to Reiner’s, feeling left out.
Instantly, your husband guided her hand to where his once was, placing his comically larger one over Maisie’s and waiting on bated breath for the baby to hopefully kick just one more time. It would be an experience for your daughter, feeling her sibling kick in the womb in her presence and you hoped they would cooperate.
Sighing in relief when the kick came, Maisie jolted a little, unsure of what that was, looking back at Reiner for answers.
“That’s your brother or sister Mais, say hi.” Speaking softly by her ear and smiling with pride, encouraging his daughter to greet her sibling.
“Hi…”
You were melting on the spot, seeing Maisie timidly acknowledge the baby even if they couldn’t hear her, Reiner sharing the same look as you. A few moments passed with occasional kicks and Reiner guiding his daughter's hand around your stomach to entice them to keep making their presence known. With each one, Maisie smiled, even if she wasn’t entirely sure what she was feeling, she knew just by the looks on yours and Reiner’s face that it was a good thing.
When the kicks couldn’t be felt anymore, you pulled your shirt back down and curled up next to Reiner, with Maisie beginning to doze off in your lap. The soft pats from your palm and the occasional threading of your fingers in her hair, she loses her battle with sleep quickly."
Chapter nine: doubts about being a good mom.
"“What’s wrong?” Murmuring, letting your hands fall in your lap and running his own up and down your arms. As he waited for your response, he tried to think of any possible reason why you could be upset, wanting to have his own comforting words ready the moment you were.
“I’m just worried over everything .”
Reiner softened, nodded for you to keep going. “I feel stupid for all this anxiety when we’ve already done this, but what if Maisie doesn’t like the baby and lashes out? How am I going to take care of two kids when you’re at work? What if I can’t-”
“You can.” Cutting you off despite knowing there was probably so much more on your mind you needed to voice. A deep sigh exhaled through his nose, taking a moment to wipe your tears and kiss the little salt stains they left behind on your now flushed cheeks. Understanding how you felt, feeling similar to before Maisie was born, Reiner moved to take you into his arms for an embrace. The soft strands of your hair tickled the side of his face, threading through with his fingers for further comfort. He could hear the further cries into his shoulder, letting his arms tighten around you.
“I know it’s been a lot for you recently, but sweetheart you know I’m going to be here. You know I’m going to go out of my way to be there and help you out, even if I am at work.” Pulling you away so he could look you in the eyes as he spoke. Reiner couldn’t help but give a silent chuckle when he scanned over your face, looking so much like Maisie when she got upset. Dipping down for a small soft kiss, he held the sides of your face as he gave you the most affectionate look he could muster.
“You are an incredible woman, mother and wife. There isn’t a doubt in my mind that you won’t be able to handle both of them because you’re smart, caring and face every obstacle with a calm, sound mind. Everything is going to work out one way or another.” Affirming to you once more that there wasn’t anything you couldn’t do nor face alone if Reiner could help it. His commitment would always be to you no matter what, be there for you like you were for him in trying times. Even if he were away and you needed him, Reiner would break and bend laws to be by your side, it was the least he could do for all that you had done for him.
“I just don’t know why I’m so worked up over this?” Wiping your nose on the back of your hand, looking up at him and then back down to your stomach. Reiner followed your gaze, carefully climbing over you to sit beside you, quickly checking on Maisie as she napped.
“Because it’s an entirely new situation, for the both of us, double the responsibility. We don’t know what it's like to raise more than one kid and that’s okay, it’s all about figuring it out as we go.” Running his finger lightly over your bump, then palming it in the center. Reiner would admit that he’d had thoughts like yours recently, nothing to this extreme, moreso worried about the present, forcing himself the reminders that he would face the future when it came.
“Yeah.”
Your response was plain, but reduced of the worry and uncertainty. Hooking the hand on your bump under your chin, Reiner laid the last of his comfort into the kiss he pressed to your lips. Whatever anxiety remained, melted off of you as you kissed him back, quickly wrapped in the blanket that were his words and actions. Reiner kissed your forehead, reaching over to bring Maisie back to his arms.
“You’ll be okay, I’ll always make sure of it.”
Slouching against the headboard once he was readjusted, he reached for your hand, stroking his thumb over the top. Whatever life had to throw this way, Reiner made the same promise over and over again, to be everything and more to you, till the day he drew his last breath."
Chapter ten: dealing with postpartum depression after yours and Reiner's son his born.
“I’m sorry.” Trembling words left your lips, sounding so pathetic and weak. You were pulled off so you could look him in the eyes, concern laced with sternness was what you were met with.
“For what?” Asking as if it were a rhetorical question, holding the side of your tear swollen face and dabbing a few of the tears away with his hand.
“For…for I don’t know, he wouldn’t calm down or stop crying and I tried everything but it wouldn’t work.”
Your husband somehow softened and hardened at your words. Reiner wasn’t truly upset with the situation, moreso with the fact that you immediately turned apologetic for being unable to calm Gabriel down. There were no signs that this was inherently your fault, and Reiner knew things would be testy with your emotions a good while after giving birth. Navigating these emotions were like walking on crack glass high in the sky, stepping lightly and weighing his words and actions to keep from everything shattering. It pained him like no other that you were a mush of emotions, knowing how mentally taxing it was on you. If somehow it were possible for him to carry all of that for you, he would.
“Sweetheart, there’s nothing to apologize for. Sometimes babies get that way and it just takes more time to calm them down, you know that.” Wrapping an arm around your waist and hauling you into his lap. Dexterous fingers glided along your flushed, tear stained cheeks, looking at you with pure adoration. Reiner knew you were bearing the weight of being strong and capable as he returned to work earlier than expected. He hated that you felt the need to do that, his promises were still true and he would uphold every last one to ensure your emotional and mental health.
“But you just got home from work and immediately had to take care of the situation. I didn’t even have dinner ready, nor did I greet you.” Your words turned into apologetic ramblings, overexplaining to make up for the situation at hand.
Sweetheart,” Brushing a thumb along your bottom lip to quiet the shaking words leaving your lips. “It’s okay, I don’t expect any of that when I get home. I care about seeing the three of you, that’s it. And it doesn’t matter if I just walked in the door and you need help, I’m your husband and their dad, it's the bare minimum of what’s expected of me.”
His words were like a wall of truth smacking you in the face, not wanting to accept it. Your husband deserved to come home and relax for a bit before jumping into parental duties, at least that was your reasoning. Reiner already had so much to handle and throwing more on him just felt…wrong. It was a way of showing your appreciation towards him, a little out of the ordinary but you couldn’t think of any other way at the moment.
“I’m just-'' Taking in a shuddering breath, squeezing your eyes shut for the confession you were about to let out. “I’m just so tired. They both need all of my attention and I want to do everything I can to give it to them but I feel so drained and I know that makes me sound like a bad mom. It’s not fair that you’re not here and it’s even worse for me to just dump more on your plate when you get home, I hate it and I feel like a failure.”
Unable to look Reiner in the face, ashamed at the words that left your mouth, you buried your face in your hands, letting out pitiful little sobs. It was one thing to inwardly confess to feeling like a failure, but to voice it aloud to your husband struck you so much harder than you expected. Intentionally or not, you dubbed yourself as the strong one, the one to lean on instead of the other way around. Reiner never burdened you with that notion, that was all your doing and you knew that. Everything had gone so smoothly with Maisie, you’d admit your expectations were high with Gabriel. Naive thinking yes, but were you so wrong in thinking that?
Settling for embracing you and pulling your hands away before he spoke, Reiner smoothed his hands over your back, rubbing circles to calm the pent up emotions inside you. He knew you held some resentment for him going back as early as he did and he couldn’t blame you. But for once he didn’t let that get inside his head, because at this moment he needed to be the rock to your support and not pity himself over something he couldn’t control.
“You’re not a failure sweetheart. The fact that you’re so upset over this tells me how much you care.” Using age old lines he once heard over and over from you to offer the same reassurance and relief it brought him. “I know it can be hard to ask for help when you feel like you can handle everything, but you need to put yourself first sometimes. You are not just a mother, you’re a person with their own individual self that deserves to just have moments to yourself. It’s not selfish or greedy to want to be away from the kids for a bit, its healthy and that’s all I want for you angel.”
Bringing yourself to look Reiner in the face, letting out a long somewhat defeated sigh, you gave a small nod. There were thousands of reasons why you loved Reiner, but his poetic words of reassurance were at the top of your list, the man stringing together words and sentences that were so beautifully conveyed that calmed your weary soul. Your husband was truly the better half of your and you couldn’t even imagine living in the world without him.
“It’s not going to happen overnight.” Countering back a bit with slight humor in your tone, the tonnage of your inner struggles lifting slowly.
His lips curled into the softest smile, tracing the lines of your cheekbones and tilting his head in a small nod. “I know, but you’re not alone, you’re never alone and I want you to get used to leaning on me more when you need to. I’m never going to judge you for whatever is bothering you, nor your thoughts or feelings.”
#reiner braun#attack on titan#snk#aot reiner#reiner x reader#reiner x you#post-rumbling#reiner fluff#snk reiner
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Arlefuri is Interesting, Actually
So I was put onto a twitter thread that's been circulating around the Arlefuri community, and I was feeling to be in a bit of a fighting mood and I found a couple points brought up by the author to be the starting point for some more interesting discussions regarding fandom culture, so I decided it wouldn't hurt to have a "little" discussion around this thread and the points that are brought up.
A quick reminder here that I am not going to link the thread or use the author's name anywhere in here because this is not an attack post. While I am here to defend a ship that I really like and see a lot of value in against a really silly twitter post, I am not here to attack or be aggressive to anyone. This is something we really need to understand and my least favorite part about twitter is how it discourages thoughtful and elaborate response, which is why I'm writing this on my tumblr instead of writing a QRT or something. I want this to be thought out and civil, and there's a very good chance that the thread was written entirely in good faith, however questionable some of the arguments made are.
the amount of arlefuri shippers ive seen that keep going "you just hate it bc its yuri" without actually seeing an explanation why its such a good ship and why they keep defending it like its so canon.
Something that I've noticed as someone who has only been engaging in fandom for about a year and a half now and who got to see Arlefuri pretty much grow from inception to now is that, after a while (especially on platforms such as twitter that are so thoroughly infected by hate and aggression) communities will develop defense mechanisms based on certain patterns of how they've been attacked before. Especially in communities which are highly antagonized for one reason or another, it's easier to have a short list of most-likely reasons someone is attacking their ship than to actually engage with the argument. One of the most reliable and effective canned arguments that one might find in a particularly combative yuri enthusiast's toolbelt is the "you don't like yuri," or, in more extreme examples, the misogyny argument.
I'm not going to get into the MLM vs WLW in fandom discourse here because, quite frankly, I'm not interested and it's completely not related to anything going on here, however the argument is common within WLW ship communities because of the tension that exists between MLM, m/f, and WLW communities, especially because in a huge number of fandoms, MLM far outnumbers the WLW. It's a reliable argument to so many because, more often than not, the anti's argument is coming from a place of anti-yuri sentiment.
In the case of Arlefuri, attacks are so frequent that, for those that decide not to block and move on, it's more efficient to pull out a tool from the toolbelt instead of engaging with each and every anti post. Arlefuri shippers are, to put it bluntly, sick and tired of it and just kinda want to do their own thing.
yes, this sounds very yuriphobic as smn who ships renheng but i do ship yuri ships like acheswan, bronseele, clorivia, eimiko, and many more. not that im against rarepairs, but arlefuri is hardly a rarepair anymore, and the way the shippers are defending it, makes it feel like its as implied as the ships i mentioned above
I mean, doesn't everyone do this? Something else I've noticed is that every single HYV ship that has even the smallest basis in the canon has people that consistently go on about how, because of certain observations regarding design/symbolism/voice lines, the ship is canon. It's important to remember, though, that lot of it is playful banter or reactions borne of excitement, and very rarely are people actually insisting that Arlefuri is canon or even implied to be canon. Because with the exception of HI3 bronseele, there isn't a single HYV ship (that I know of) that is downright confirmed. And yes, that even includes Acheswan.
I think the observation being made here is a result of two things: Arlefuri as a ship just getting bigger, and how fed-up Arlefuri shippers are of being antagonized. The first point is very obvious: the more people there are out there to talk about a ship, the more confident and loud those discussions are going to become. The second one though is more interesting because I think, as a community gets antagonized more and more, a very natural response to people talking poorly about a thing you like is to engage with it even more. A lot of people, instead of taking the fight back to those that are attacking the ship, instead back away from the argument and, as if almost spitefully, engage with the ship even more. Hell, I've even seen some of my fellow arlefuri shippers talk about how this discourse is going to make them ship arlefuri even harder. It's just a natural response almost.
Also I genuinely don't understand what rarepairs have to do with the discussion at hand. It's brought up again later in the thread, and even there I'm not sure what point it's trying to get across. There's a though process there, but whatever it is it isn't communicated in the thread, which is no fault of the thread author since twitter is stupidly restrictive as a platform for arguments and expressing thoughts (that's why I'm writing this on tumblr).
literally what is the 'flavor' and 'dynamic' in arlefuri other than 'happy and grumpy' and 'enemies to lovers'??? they barely have any backstory together other than "girl one traumatizes girl two and gives her cake as an apology because it doesnt benefit her to be on bad terms with girl two". there is nothing appealing about their relationship, and honestly i feel like furina should just be her own person without that romantic nonsense.
Well I'm glad you asked!
Arlefuri is a ship that has a lot of layers and a lot of different interpretations, and I think the only way to get a proper understanding of why so many find the ship appealing is to go out onto the Arlefuri tag on ao3 and read some of more popular fics that are out there. However, I'm going to offer my personal understanding of the ship and why I enjoy it so much.
In short, the allure of Arlefuri to me lies in a simple concept: safety.
I think a lot of the misunderstanding around Arlefuri and why Arlefuri gets accused of being proship so often lies in a misunderstanding of Furina's story and what Arlecchino represents in said story. Namely, Arle wasn't the only person that made Furina feel unsafe during the events of the archon quest. Literally everyone that was involved in that quest was doing practically the exact same thing that Arlecchino did: cornering her into a position which would force her to reveal her identity as "false" archon. So coming out of the archon quest in Fontaine, Furina has not a single soul she can trust in Fontaine anymore because of how thoroughly traumatized she was in those last few days of her run as archon. Every single person involved in discovering the truth behind the Oratrice betrayed Furina in every sense of the word.
Obviously, the game has to make Furina warm up to the traveler for marketing sake (which is one of the only gripes I have about Furina's story), but aside from that, she still has a distaste for people outside. Evidence of this can be seen with how she talks in two distinct vocal modes which I'll get into here more in a bit.
This is all to say that, one, Furina is starting from scratch relationship-wise and can trust nobody, and two, that Arlecchino is no more of an antagonist than anyone else. The only difference is that Arlecchino was more forward with it, and Furina had built her up in her head as the big bad that would finally out the entire operation (that's where Furina's fear of Arlecchino comes from).
Where this all gets interesting is when you consider Arlecchino as pretty much a symbol for all that betrayal that Furina faced. Arlecchino, just like the traveler and crew, cornered her in a position by complete surprise that would, with one more move, force her to either prove herself as archon in one way or another, before they discovered that there's more to the story and moving their attention elsewhere. When you consider Arlecchino as a symbol of that, then what a relationship w/ Arlecchino represents is Furina learning how to trust and feel safe in the presence of other people.
This is a dynamic I explore in my own fic, "What Do You Want?" and is something that is explored to even more depth in the Arlefuri bible, "A Fatui Harbinger in Lady Furina's Court." Hell, even the biggest chapter of my own fic which is the catalyst for the relationship that is explored for the rest of the fic is literally called "Safety." The entire point of the ship is for Furina to find safety in someone and, through Arlecchino, to learn for the first time in her 500 years of life how to trust and love people.
I could continue on about why I enjoy about Arlefuri all day, if you can't tell, and I could start discussing the nuances of their grumpy/happy dynamic and all the gender stuff and various other examples of incredible writing and interpretations of the ship, but I think you get the idea. There's depth here. You just have to look for it.
arlefuri shippers+ships are fine IF you acknowledge that your ship is barely even canon (maybe until more infois released) and that there is no reason to be defending them so hard over very very very little crumbs, when most of those crumbs are actually headcanons that you made up yourself.
Again, nobody is earnestly going out there and defending the canonicity of Arlefuri. We're defending something completely different which I'll discuss in the next section. But even then, why should we? Why is a ship okay only if we acknowledge the lack of canonicity in a ship? We all are taking part in a culture that was literally borne of taking one canon or another and doing really silly things w/ it. That's why our fandom ancestors borrowed the term "canon" from religious studies and applied it to fandom: they needed a way to differentiate the stuff that was officially a part of the media and what was being written by fans.
We're all here to have fun. We're playing with dolls and making them kiss. There is absolutely no harm in us doing our own thing and engaging in a ship just as, say, a renheng shipper would. Just because a ship isn't canon doesn't mean that the shippers have to wear big signs on their backs that say "our ship is not canon and we are aware of that." This point feels strangely targeted in that way.
im not an arlefuri hater, infact, i was indifferent to it because i knew many people would ship it eventually, but seeing the ship grow more and more and the shippers attacking nonshippers with NO explanation on why they are defending such a copium ship is starting to make me hate it.
Okay, here's where the main discussion point is, and this right here is why I'm writing this whole essay/response thing.
This is a strawman.
This is not happening.
Every single Arlefuri shipper I've personally talked to could not care less if you don't like Arlefuri. Not every ship is for everyone, and there's nothing wrong with that. But there's a very big difference between not liking a ship and antagonizing a ship.
One of the things I absolutely hate about fandom is how much power lies in the accusation of being "proship." If someone is able to accuse someone of being proship and that accusation sticks, whether it's true or not, that person is screwed. And the same thing goes for ships. If a ship is successfully labeled as "proship" then that means that everyone that might publicly engage with that ship is going to also be labeled as proship, and that means they're going to be antagonized, even if there is nothing wrong with the ship itself.
Because people misunderstand a single cutscene in the game, people tend to label Arlefuri as, at best, toxic, and at worst, proship. And after a while, this gets tiring, especially for a community that is relatively small.
As stated before, Arlefuri shippers are so tired of being attacked and accused of various things, and because of that, engaging with people that attack the thing that we like in a respectful way becomes really really hard, and at some point, these defense attempts have started to lean more and more aggressive.
This is where I think that perception of Arlefuri shippers being so militant come from: they're defending a ship that they like in a rather aggressive and fed-up way which is very easy to interpret as attacking people for just having opinions.
Like I said before, there's a big difference between not liking a ship and antagonizing a ship.
For some reason, so many people antagonize Arlefuri. And because of how much it happens, responses have become, more often than not, either canned as discussed before, or angry.
i am lgbtqia+, i support and love love lgbtqia+ ships (including hetero ships bht thats for another conversation) but i really dont see why arlefuri is such a popular ship.
I agree, that is a separate conversation, but I find it really odd that the author found it important to spend valuable characters pointing this out.
like i said before, rarepairs are fine and fun, go for it. but if youre going to mindlessly attack people without explaining your reason, you're going to be just like most neuvifuri shippers who like to see 'nonchalant tall person' have sex with 'smaller, more childish (mentally) and petite person'. its not the ship you like, maybe its just the image, the fantasy, the thought. or you're just projecting.
There is a lot to unpack with this last point.
First of all, setting aside accusing arlefuri shippers of attacking again which we've talked about, this is straight up infantilizing Furina. Again, I'm assuming this thread was written in good faith, but if it wasn't, that's an insidious thing to throw into the thread to make that implication. As much as I'm not a fan of nvfr shippers, even they don't deserve that.
Furina is bubbly and energetic, silly and a bit out there, but she is not childish. If you pay attention to any of the quests she's in post Masquerade of the Guilty, you'll notice that (at least in the English dub although I'm assuming it carries to other dubs as well) Furina has two vocal modes with which she speaks: one for when she's in public situations with people she isn't super familiar or trusting with, and one for when she's talking one-on-one with the traveler or otherwise in situations where she feels safe. That latter vocal mode is what almost all of her voice lines in the character menu are spoken in, and is what you can consider her true self (her Ousia version of herself) which is much more thoughtful, calm, and straightforward. When she is acting as her true self, she is incredibly mature and her 500 years of life and stress really start to show.
What I'm assuming the author is thinking of when they call Furina mentally childish is how she acts when she's around various people. This is an act. She still pretends to be someone she's not when she's out and about, and that version of herself (her Pneuma aligned self) is one that is designed to be as appealing as possible: energetic, silly, and slightly arrogant. Once again, it's a character, or if you're more partial to Autistic/neurodivergent Furina headcanons, it's her masking.
Another really weird implication that comes out of this last point (at least to me) is that any and all Arlefuri content is just smut. That's obviously not true--just take my corpus of Arlefuri work as three examples out of however many. And I think it's not fair to judge the morality of most ships purely on the smut. Yes, sex can be a very useful tool for exploring the dynamics of characters, and that is used quite often in Arlefuri (same as literally every other ship known to fandom), but, w/r/t Arlefuri specifically, so much more interesting discussions exist outside of the bedroom, and some of the most seminal and impressive Arlefuri works are those that do not focus around sex. "A Fatui Harbinger in Lady Furina's Court" by DarlingMistaken, yes, is rated Explicit, but only because of one or two chapters. The entirety of the fic is an exploration of Furina's PTSD and the safety dynamic I talked about earlier. Eris's "All Bark No Bite" is completely Arlefuri sex free for the first 16 chapters and has a lot of interesting discussions of Furina's loneliness leading up to the smutty chapters. "Embers" by ChonkCatto is a slow burn romance which dives even deeper to the psychological trauma both Arlecchino and Furina have faced, as well as an exploration of Furina discovering her sexuality. And while I'm not a huge fan of tooting my own horn like this, I'm personally really proud of the discussions I have about power, trust, agency, and how love needn't be loud and passionate in my sister arlefuri fics, "What Do You Want?" and "There Must Be Something Here".
And I also want to point out that literally every ship any of us likes is purely because of the image, fantasy, and thought. That's the point of fandom. I know the author is particularly talking about the sexual side of things, but even then, that's why we do what we do. We like the idea of our favorite characters smooching, and so we make them smooch. Sometimes it's for reasons that takes an essay 3k words and counting to explain, and sometimes it's because "I find both of them hot." There's nothing wrong with that, and there never has been. If you want to read more about my thoughts on this topic specifically, you can read my previous post on here, "A Short Discussion on Fandom Culture"
Finally, I want to leave y'all with a reminder that discourse like this a fire that only you can fuel. Twitter as a platform is designed to both encourage saying things that will bait a reaction and to encourage responding to said bait in as reactionary of a way as possible. And because of the character restraints built into the app, that makes communicating your full thoughts incredibly difficult, and starts forcing people to rely on gotcha's and mantras instead of properly discussing things. And when people start echoing the same things over and over, distain in those spouting those mantras is developed in people, no matter the intention. So just block and move on. Take a page out of the fuqing shippers' book and just move on, because unless we all engage in long discussions over thousands of words, nobody is going to listen to each other because twitter is designed for people to not listen to each other.
This is a war that nobody is going to win, and it's so much better to pack up your things and return home from the front lines. It's so much better if you let people like what they like and not like what they don't like and say what they will say. We're all just a bunch of random ass nobodies beefing about fictional characters.
Just block and move on. It's so much better.
Trust me.
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Heya, I love your writing and taste in things.
I’ve finished (and loved) everything you’ve posted <3
Are there any sandman fics that have tickled your fancy lately?
Thank you so much!!! I sadly do not have time to read near as much Sandman fic as I'd like, but I have scoured both my memory and my bookmarks on AO3 (all twelve of them) and dug up some absolutely wonderful stories - hope at least one or two of these is new to you?!
I am probably a bit weird in this, but I don't bookmark fics I love (which is really nearly all I've read) insamuch as fics that have done something in particular that I think is so well-executed or clever or inspiring that I want to be able to study it like a creature in its own right. Usually these are stories that have the traits I admire most in fiction: economy of language, being very fucking funny, making me viscerally uncomfortable, or outright haunting me.
I loved reading all of them but your mileage may vary! Caveat lector like more than half of these are smut and/or violent so please check the tags against your own preferences. Several long-winded recs with excerpts and explanations under the cut:
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The Birthday of the Beast | @slythernim | Dream/Hob | T | 3.3K
Father Almighty, though I have long not been your servant, I remain your unmanageable son. Here on Earth, closer to Hell than to Heaven, as I celebrate perhaps the least holy of holy days, I must imagine myself like unto Lucifer more than as Michael, that he and I might together make of the darkness a place for humanity to grow. He blows out the candles.
Hob turns 666. Extremely fun fic by Nym that features incredible characterization within a very short space, Catholicism, Lucifer, and of course, gets a very special birthday gift. But you shall have to read the fic to see what it is. Read everything of Nym's, actually.
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New Mistakes | Anonymous | Dream/Corinthian | M | 3.2K
Dream slid his thumb into the Corinthian’s mouth, the one he shared with most, the one with which he commonly spoke. “Well?” he asked. “Are you fed?” The voice that came from his left-eye mouth buzzed like locusts. My lord, we are. The voice that came from his right-eye mouth dripped like honey. My lord, we can always be fed more. Dream pulled back, looking at the Corinthian expectantly. The Corinthian swallowed, running his tongue along his teeth. There was a faint blush on his cheeks, and Dream was unaccountably flattered. “My lord,” he said. “I wish to be good.”
Have read almost no Corintheus but this fic hits on so much that I find distantly intriguing about the pairing. Perfect dialogue, gorgeous rhythm. Wonderfully visceral. Absolutely bonkers nuts for repetition in threes, as I'm sure you know, and I love how it was used here.
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Lucy Locket | Anonymous | Dream/Hob and Dream/Hob/Corinthian | E | 17K
Five chapters (now with a new threesome added in late April, much to my delighted surprise!) of just fantastic roleplay smut that in-between all the sex is by turns incredibly funny and tender. Alternating Dream and Hob POV. As somebody for whom sexual roleplay has been my literal bread and butter on a professional basis, it shouldn't be surprising I am so fond of this fic - but it catches me out every time! Like a blow from behind, and I am winded. It is ridiculously hot and distressingly perfect all-through, and I would absolutely marry the author about it (sorry author if you're reading this). No excerpt because I cannot choose and will simply suggest that if you're up for kink that you go read it all at once.
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Public | @softest-punk | Dream/Hob | E | 1.1K
"Oh, darling," Hob murmurs, fingering the edge of Dream's delicate lace knickers. Dream feels his smirk against his jaw, bites his lip at the brush of a kiss under his ear. "You forget how old I am. I learned to fuck with an audience."
Every day I get closer and closer to needing to write Dream and/or Hob with vulvas; this may have been the fic that sealed the deal for me, I think. Ridiculously hot, and enshrined in my head forever for the line above. I learned to fuck with an audience. God! How good. A masterclass in the slutty drabble that nevertheless retains peak Dream/Hob characterization (I would argue that sex is in fact one of the best narrative vehicles for characterization and exploration of interpersonal dynamics...this bias is probably why nearly all these recs are so horny.) One day I will learn how to write proper smut in media res like this and not preface it with gratuitous plot.
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worship like a dog | @thewalrus-said | Dream/Hob | E | 2.5K
“Is it so inconceivable that I might love you?” Dream murmured, running his manicured nail down Hob’s cheek. Hob tried to speak, swallowed, and tried again. “No one ever has before,” he said. “No one but God.”
Hob is a priest. Dream is a demon, except he's not. Dizzyingly hot for so many reasons, with a delightful canon dialogue echo. And again, must stress this: Hob is a priest. Hob is a priest. Hob is a priest, go read it.
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Safehouse | Anonymous | Hob/Corinthian | E | 5K
“I need a room. One without a door.”
The best execution of the sex pollen trope I've ever seen, with the worst men. Very, very good fic with a brilliant premise and unerring execution. World-building is done in such brief but vivid strokes - it feels like a 50K fic whenever I remember it, and I'm always surprised how short it actually is. Haunts me in the best of ways.
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As well - these fics are well-known and well-loved - but some stories that are utterly wonderful and contain lines that haunt me weeks, sometimes months later - stories that rearranged my soul, lurched me closer towards writing for Sandman, and warrant mention even though I am SURE you have read them, include:
@moorishflower's iconic and beautiful Odyssey fic, maybe sprout wings was the first fic I commented on with my AO3 account, and among the best fics I've ever read in any fandom; slightly deeper cuts from Heather's oeuvre (if, for some reason you are not reading everything already) that I am obsessed with and have reread multiple times: vowel shift, most vain devices, an act of faith. Genius stuff and unbelievably gorgeous language. Just go read it all, honestly
@softest-punk's Shelter is one of the first Sandman fics I ever read, and is beyond lovely; if you have not read their entire deep and profoundly lovely back catalogue, I recommend Catching Up (quintessential Cecil deep tissue emotional massage), Delayed (or: my favourite kink and favourite Endless); Ferrous (vampires! bad men! ahh! ooh!); and I would of course be remiss and ungrateful to not mention self-abandon, and the confounding effects thereof, a 10K fic that perfectly answered my general question of how the three lads would actually get together once the Corinthian and Hob had started fucking (as narrative foils that deserve such treats)
@xx-vergil-xx's Hounds is an ongoing epic that has singlehandedly caused me more emotions than humanity has language for; it is ambitious in scope and sticks every landing. The world is alive and lovingly-detailed. The language is a poem. It is so smart, so beautiful, and so well-researched and built. It is a TEMPLE unto itself, and appropriately worthy of worship
I will also suggest you read absolutely everything by @that-banhus because she literally cannot miss and writes the loveliest, cleverest worlds. All of it.
#asks#gloam's sandman rec list#this is basically my fic rec masterpost lol#unfortunately i flatter myself about my good taste and cannot stop going on about what i love and why once given the barest excuse to start#the sandman#dreamling#corintheus#hobrintheus#COB#fic recs#it's not that i exclusively read fic ppl feel the desire to publish on anon#it's that what people publish on anon FUCKING SLAPS#spent far too long enjoying drawing this up and it still feels woefully inadequate#but it's a start#into either remarkable sandman fic or my id really
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Blue Lock S2 Ep 12 (extremely Nagi biased)
I LOVE THIS EPISODE SO MUCH THERE'S SO MUCH NAGI
FIRSTLY THERE'S REO'S NAGI COPY. That entire lead up was so hype I kinda got shivers hearing Reo's voice repeating what Nagi said (names of the different techniques he used) when he was executing the goal. It really highlights how different their voices are and that it’s REO saying them!
His voice is really very masculine in comparison, low with a lot of rasp and growl. He sounded so heavy and serious too because everything is always serious and heavy when it comes to Nagi :)
"Do you know how many times I've seen it?" "I know this move better than anyone" (He's so intense omfg 😳😭)
On the other hand, Nagi sounded so cute and childlike instead like his usual self? Why is he so cute?? 😭 Shimazaki really is such a good choice for him and his baby voice.
And of course Nagi's the one who received the pass! Can't wait for the next Reo -> Nagi express train pass coming up :p
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Here begins another sequence of "Nagi floating around" lol. I'm not exaggerating when I say the U20 match is a lot of Nagi just floating around being useless after his first super goal (though that also involved a lot of mid air floating aerobatics), especially so in the previous epi where he's in a lot of frames but doing nothing except floating 😭
But this time he's useful! While he's floating a lot, he also did a superb ball control and pass! I love how this entire sequence is animated BECAUSE HE'S REALLY JUST FLOATING IN MID AIR THE WHOLE TIME WTF. Nagi be having whole ass convos in his brain while mid air 😭
"Only Nagi can control that long pass into the goal area" Yes even just from still frames alone it looks very technically challenging and seems like you would need time dilation and levitation powers to pull it off??
I love how absolutely frustrated Nagi sounded when he called Isagi "striker" lol, cause he realised he's being used (like a tool). Though his "zurui na" (that's unfair) sounded whiny and was very cute as usual.
"Zurui na, striker" but still calmly passes the ball to Isagi with a "yes boss" 😭
How much have I missed his "yes boss" and calling Isagi "striker". You've no idea how happy Nagi doing this makes me cause it’s just too darn cute I was legit so giddy over it. It was like a throw back to their teaming up days (I'm ignoring the supporting actor narrative being detrimental let me live brain)!
But honestly, I do think Nagi likes acting upon commands as we'll know in future chaps :) He has his egoist side of wanting to show off and be the winner but also, he does like being the supporting act! Especially to people he admires!
-
Honestly, they did Barou's goal and celebration dirty!!! There's even less frames than usual wtf? In the manga, it was really cold!! They rushed through his explanation of his thought process too and worst of all, they didn't even properly show Barou flinging Nagi to the ground!! Like the choice of angle used we could barely see what's going on 😭
I suspect 8bit couldn't bear animating their babygirl being flung like that/jk
Because at least they gave us this?? I love that they actually animated Nagi getting up from the ground lol, and how they expanded on Nagi's deadpan reaction to Barou getting a yellow card. After getting "scolded" by him too. Nagi's everywhere and I'm loving it 😭
-
AND LASTLY ADDITIONAL TIME LOL
Additional time should just be renamed to "Nagi's imagination" I swear 😭 I died here btw, the comedy of the chaos transiting to real time where it's quiet and its all in Nagi and Isagi's head. He's making the exact same face as when he imagined mosquite Sae 😭
Nagi: "What do you even do at a maid cafe?" My sweet innocent summer child, please stay the way you're. His "sumimasen tenchou" to being scolded by boss Barou is also way too cute.
Thank you Blue Lock anime team for blessing us with this chibi angel Nagi, he (and maid Barou and angel Isagi) can truly heal the world 😭
MY SOUL IS HEALED
I can REALLY feel the love this studio has for Nagi. Thank you 8bit for continuing to make me feel blessed to be a Nagi fan 😭😭😭 And enjoying the season despite.... everything else 😭
#ms#blue lock#anime#nagi seishiro#now that nagi has joined maid barou’s maid cafe#ONLY ONE LAST STEP TO MAID NAGI LOL
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Book One | Chapter Twenty-Two
Index | First Chapter | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter
Tag list: @bloodlessheirbyjacques @magefaery @did-i-do-this-write @marrowwife
@muddshadow @outpost51 @full-on-sam @bluberimufim
@unclear-contributions @talesfromtheunknowable @guessillcallitart @flowerprose
@ashirisu @xarrixii @the-letterbox-archives
(ask to be added)
On the third day, as on the previous two, Patrice woke up early and made her way out to the gardens. Felisjyta was already there, sprawled out on the stone bench. There was no sign of Errys. Felisjyta sat up when she heard Patrice's boots on the cobblestone path, and she offered a sheepish grin.
"I wasn't sure you’d come today," she said. "I'm glad you did." She placed both hands on the bench and pushed herself to her feet. "I wanted to apologize for yesterday. I meant what I said but…not really the way I said it."
Patrice had been in a good mood that morning, but now she drew up short. Just because her anger was banked temporarily did not mean it was gone entirely. "And what did you mean to say?" She asked, her voice cold.
Felisjyta held up both hands in an obviously placating gesture. "Just that, well, if you want to live successfully among humans you have to learn more than just fashion and a few titles. You have to learn what humans are all about."
Patrice did not let herself be soothed so easily, though she knew it was an accurate assessment. Hadn't she admitted as much to Lord Mikael the previous evening? But she stood her ground, crossing her arms and waiting expectantly for a better explanation. It was a game, just like the one Patrice had played with Rozhalea. Like Rozhalea, Felisjyta found herself outmatched – undone by the inherently human dislike of silence.
"I understand, really!" she said. "It's the same for us, to have to learn how and why these Runerians do what they do. Rozhalea puts so much pressure on us to understand. I've been where you are, that's all I meant."
Patrice relented at last, due to the pleading sound in Felisjyta's tone and the fact that it was a well-deserved critique. "I understand. I wish to apologize as well. For yelling, not what I said. I still think what I said is correct."
Felisjyta laughed, then shrugged. "Good enough for me I guess. But now you're mine. You skipped practice yesterday so I'm working you extra hard today."
While the two of them had been speaking, the cat curled up on top of the practice swords lying next to the bench. Now Felisjyta reached down and tugged them both free. He batted at them halfheartedly as she pulled them loose but made no move to get up. Instead he yawned and put his head down. Felisjyta tossed one of the swords to Patrice, who caught it far more easily than she would've been able to do at the beginning.
"Where's Errys?" She asked.
"Now don't try to distract me!" Felisjyta teased. "Really though, she said she had something else to do this morning. And get ready, we're going to work on using some of your other senses – things a human wouldn't be able to rely on."
It was a new exercise. Patrice had to close her eyes and try to block Felisjyta's occasional attacks – all delivered in the same height range – by sound alone. Patrice originally thought it would be easy, as her hearing had helped her before. But she had never been forced to rely on it as her only sense. At first Felisjyta managed to hit her every time, not hard enough to bruise but more than hard enough to sting.
"You're doing this on purpose as revenge," Patrice accused her after a particularly hard strike.
"I would never do that," said Felisjyta. Patrice did not need to hear the undercurrent of laughter in the words to know the knight was lying. But if this was Felisjyta's revenge, it was extremely mild and more of an annoyance than anything, so Patrice put up with it without complaining.
After the first few minutes, the exercise began to make sense. Still, the first attack she blocked was accomplished almost by accident. "Oh, I did it!" She said, looking over at Felisjyta.
Felisjyta smiled. "You did, but do you think I'll let you off that easy? You skipped an entire day of practice. Close your eyes, let's go again!"
There was nothing to raise one's spirits quite as much as accomplishing something, and that day's practice was certainly a much more enjoyable way to spend the morning than yesterday's sulking and muttering.
Fortunately, no one brought up the events of the previous day at the lunch table. From what Mikael had said, they were known to at least half of the people present and, given the human propensity for gossip, it was more than likely to be all. Still, no one mentioned a word to Patrice, and Katerina, sulking in her chair next to her mother, was largely ignored. The meal passed uneventfully, full of nothing more than the usual political talk right up until the moment the queen stood to announce the activity for the day.
"Now that our estate has dried suitably from the rain, we won't force you to spend another day indoors." She said the words with a smile, and a titter of laughter greeted the announcement. Patrice didn't understand it – she had been outside all day yesterday and everything seemed perfectly dry to her. But perhaps humans had a different standard for such things, as they had for so many others.
After the laughter faded away, the queen spoke again. "Your horses are being readied for you, and any who wish to fly a hawk may take their pick from our mews."
This announcement was greeted with a wave of excited babble that completely eclipsed the earlier laughter. Even Katerina had lost her sullen appearance.
Patrice turned to Felisjyta. "Fly a hawk?" She asked, as they rose from the table and followed the other nobles outside.
"Hunting," Felisjyta explained. "This is a hunting party, but it's the birds who do the work. I don't know if you'll like it or not, but you'll get to find out soon."
"Will you hunt?"
Felisjyta shook her head. “I’ve nothing against the sport, but I don’t like the idea of flying a bird I didn’t teach myself. It’s important to have a good bond between bird and human, I think.”
The group skirted through the gardens and went around the back of the summer palace. Here the stable was located – built from the same white stone and painted gaily. Horses, tacked and ready, milled around in a paddock off to one side. Palace servants controlled the gate, letting nobles in one at a time to mount their horses and ride them out of the paddock.
Patrice had never mounted Vasya on her own before, Felisjyta had always been there to hoist her into place. She watched the other nobles ahead of her. Some of them could mount with little trouble, putting one foot in the stirrup and then bouncing into place. Most chose to guide their horses over to the paddock fence and use the railing to gain extra height before trying.
She followed their lead. Patrice was the last to be given a horse, out of deference to the uneasiness she caused in prey animals. She worried about causing trouble and slowing everything down – more due to the threat of embarrassment than any wish to avoid inconveniencing her human hosts. But Vasya gave her no trouble, and Patrice was able to get into the saddle with minimal fuss.
As she did that, those nobles who had requested birds were now receiving them. Each person wore a thick leather glove – a sensible precaution. The birds wore leather too – leather around their feet, and around their eyes.
Felisjyta was also looking at the birds. She spoke as Patrice rode up next to her. “Nice looking birds,” she said. “Of course, you’d expect that from royalty right?”
“They have nice looking everything else,” Patrice agreed.
Errys, seated on her pale, graceful mare rode up to Patrice’s other side. “Neither of you are joining in, hm?”
Patrice just shook her head.
“I thought you would,” Felisjyta said. She didn’t bother explaining her views a second time. “It’s such a big sport here.”
"I've never been hawking in all my life!" Errys laughed. "My mother pushed against it, probably because it was so popular with this set and all."
"It seems like your parents tried to keep you away from the royal family, and yet here you are. What a fate!" Felisjyta laughed. "If you had not been a knight, you could have avoided them entirely."
Errys snorted. "Knighthood is the only thing that takes me completely out of the line of succession – you think I had a chance to be anything else?" She sighed. "I like it, it's true. But it's just as well I'm an only child. Oh, they're moving."
Indeed the horses were beginning to move, leaving the summer palace behind and heading into the wilderness surrounding it. Those with birds moved to the front of the pack, followed by a few servants carrying wicker baskets full of pigeons and rabbits. Those who intended only to watch moved at a slower pace.
Patrice pointed to the baskets. "Those are for hunting?"
Felisjyta grinned. "A big parade like this will scare off any game within a mile. That's why animals are provided. I'm sure they'll find some clearing or other to release the animals into so that we all get a good view."
Sure enough, the procession only went far enough to come to a small meadow. The mob of watchers stopped at the edge of the meadow while the hunters headed further into it. There was some initial milling confusion before the queen urged her horse forward and the others moved respectfully back.
The queen's bird was a huge golden eagle, and it seemed strange to Patrice to see so wild a bird sitting almost tamely on a human arm. The queen bore the weight of the bird with little evidence of effort or fear – a testimony to how often she had done this before.
The hood was removed from the bird, revealing fierce yellow eyes, and it was launched into the air. Before it climbed too high, a large rabbit was released from the cage. It bolted out across the meadow. The humans quickly lost sight of it in the grass, but the eagle had no such difficulty.
The dive the bird went into was nothing as dramatic as a falcon's, nor anything Patrice's mother would've done, but it was still beautiful in its execution and efficiency. It was a long, low glide, and the retrieval of the prey was heralded by a boom like thunder as the eagle snapped its wings open to full capacity. The bird needed a little prompting to leave its rightful prey and return to the queen's glove – but eventually accepted the strips of raw meat she offered and came to heel.
The king-consort flew second, his falcon a much smaller and sleeker bird than his wife's. For him, they released a pigeon that was slammed out of the air even as it winged desperately for freedom.
Everyone who wanted to fly a bird got a turn, even Katerina's smaller kestrel got to fly after an even smaller songbird kept among the pigeons for just that reason.
Patrice didn't look away even once. She knew comparatively little of birds or this strange sport, but the sight of flying hunters made her nostalgic. As she watched, she kept the spirit stone Felisjyta had given her loosely held in one palm. The stone was less than half its former size and no longer looked the least bit like a dragon, blunted considerably even as Patrice's grief had been. But still, she liked to hold it. Her afternoon was bittersweet, but not at all unpleasant.
Index | First Chapter | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter
#writeblr#writing#tc's writing#dragon's daughter#femslash#lgbt fantasy#queer fantasy#fantasy novels#authors on tumblr
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Since we can almost all agree season 1 was the best. What do you think made it so good and so favorited compared to the three seasons?
Given that I've recently finished rewatching Season 1, I feel like now is an excellent time to answer this ask.
In my opinion, Season 1 of Young Justice is the best, and none of the following seasons even come close to matching it. At its core, Season 1 introduced us to this core team of teenage heroes and told the story through their lens. There are a few defining key features to this season that makes it stand above the others, and they are as follows:
You did not have to know any comics history in order to understand and follow the plot. This is, arguably, one of the most important elements of Season 1 that the other seasons (Outsiders and Phantoms in particular) fail on. Each character is a unique take to their comic counterparts. In the case of Kaldur and Artemis, they remain completely separate and can almost be considered characters that are completely unique to the show. In the case of more recognizable heroes (Wally, Dick, Superboy and Miss Martain), Season 1 gives them enough of a refresh that they feel new, but with familiar elements that make them fun to watch and get to know. Easter eggs don't detract from the plot, and remain just fun little things to point out and commend for their inclusion. Unlike later seasons, which pulled heavy elements from DC comics and wove them into the plot, Season 1 is accessible and enjoyable to everyone and isn't just for those who've read the comics.
The core cast of characters. Season 1, primarily, focused on the Team (Aqualad, Robin, Superboy, Kid Flash, Miss Martian and Artemis, sometimes Red Arrow.... and later, Zatanna and Rocket). These characters were the main cast, and every episode revolved around a story that put them in the spotlight. Every character (with the exception of Rocket) got at least one episode focused on their their development and gave them a chance to shine, and the audience a chance to get to know and appreciate them. The famous couples (Spitfire, Supermartian, etc.) got proper build up and were pretty fleshed out, making them endearing to the fandom. Unlike later seasons, which have outrageously bloated casts and relationships that got maybe 50 seconds of screentime (I'm looking at you, Wonderbird), Season 1 invested in its characters and let them lead the story, making them feel all the more real and the story that much more genuine. This is why the harsh transition between Season 1 and Invasion feels like a heartbreak. We spent 26 episodes falling in love with the core Team, and now all of a sudden we're expected to care about an entirely new cast with no support, explanation or buildup. It felt like being cheated out of 5 years with this cast, and even now we still don't have answers to a lot of questions in the gap.
Show, don't tell. I won't get too much into this one, but if you've been following me throughout Outsiders and Phantoms you'll know how much I loathe the amount of "telling" instead of showing. Season 1 does this so much better. Missions are played out, instead of explained to viewers through excessive monologues. Characters let their actions speak for them and actually had the time to play around the plot, instead of letting the plot making the decisions for them.
The reality of it all. At the risk of sounding like I belong on Twitter, Outsiders and Phantoms has an insane amount of 'woke' storylines-- for the sake of being woke. Don't get me wrong, several of the topics brought up in these later seasons are extremely important topics and I can understand why they're included; they're just not executed well. Compare this to Season 1 where the natural reaction to the events of Failsafe was that everyone on the team needed therapy to discuss it. There was no cheesiness, no hammering on the head about it. Action --> Natural Consequence.
I can really go on and on about how amazing Season 1 is, but truly, it was so good. I wish we'd gotten 4 seasons just outlining 4 years with the Team, getting to see them grow and change and be together. The rest of the seasons are fine, but none hold the charm and sheer power that the first have, and for that it will always be top tier in my book.
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❝ i'm sure my absence seemed pretty abrupt. it's what everyone on campus is talking about right now. me being back, where i was. everyone keeps asking ... but ... actually, though? i wanted to talk to you ... ❞
for some reason. even yagami can't put his finger on it, but one of the first things he did when he got his phone back (and out of sight from prying panda eyes) was text the raven-haired girl from school.
❝ i just wanted to say ... i'm sorry for leaving you hanging like that. that wasn't my intention. ❞ that feels lame, wrong even.
because, in truth, he feels like he owes her an explanation for something. something he just cannot quite grasp. it's on the cusp of his tongue, like he's ready to say it, but the words are unable to form, and thus all he can muster is an apology that even sounds a bit dull coming from him. he doesn't even really know what he's apologizing for.
HERE IS THE REALITY: the investigation is at a standstill. nothing is progressing. they can't find kira. studying the yotsuba group has provided enough context to keep the case alive ... but little beyond that. after the task force's probing, yotsuba clammed up and sold most of their assets outright, muddying their stocks and investments along the way, and then the company dispersed itself entirely before L could even try to pull the plug.
finding them all as individuals has been tough, and L was certain up until this point of three things in absolute:
kira is operating within yotsuba ... and that yagami raito was kira at one point in time, likely the original, and presumably gave up his powers to someone else. this power was somehow also given to amane misa, but was taken away, leaving her in much the same position as yagami. it sounds plausible, right?? it sounds too plausible. even with how damning it felt to be put on the spot, yagami had to admit ... he wondered. am i kira? is ryuzaki (is L) right?
still, there's no proof. without his memories, yagami is admittedly only as good as he is normally.
which is pretty outstanding, he would argue, as he's been pretty invaluable, if not a bit argumentative, up until this point. and agreeable, he would further insist. extremely so, given the circumstances i was put in.
his wrist is healing from the chaffing of the cuffs, but a thin red line remains for now. yagami rubs at it absentmindedly, sighing to himself before looking back up to her.
her. jabami yumeko. he knows her, even remembers her, but it's all so ... limited. limited in its scope of what they truly are. he remembers conversations of idle passing — exchanges about their families, dinner invitations, walking the campus together.
but that's where it ends. at least, he thinks it does.
ask him about the ship of theseus and his answer might be different now.
❝ this sounds crazy, but i feel like ... i missed a lot, right? while i was away. but, like, it's more than that, you know? i was hoping maybe you could fill me in? that we could go out together? ❞
i know we used to. i wish i could remember what we talked about. i wish i could remember why i need to see you. all i know is ... i just do. — @snakedevour
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I discovered that Communication Knife AweSamDrunz have Children Now today, and I’m loving everything I’m reading so far.
Also that they hang out with Sapnap, Philza, and Techno. Was not expecting that, but yeah, Dream would want to reconnect, wouldn’t he? Even if it make Sam Uncomfortable and Punz Salty.
aaaaaaaaa I'm glad!!! The kids are sort of separate from the main au in that they're not really the main focus, they're just something that occasionally makes me happy to rotate in my mind. Healed, happy characters who are extremely neurodivergent, with their weird neurodivergent children, able to exist contently.
also, yeah!!! I realized a while back that I haven't really talked about the relationships and conflicts or Anything with real consistency on this tumblr. I'm used to interacting with people in the discord who've already had to listen to me so many times yell and rant that I've forgotten that I. might need to give context actually to other people who have showed up to a person on a soapbox spouting nonsense.
short answer: yeah, theres a Lot of complicated feelings, but by the time the children are in the picture its been like a decade and peace has been made with most things. No one has forgotten, of course. Shit was fucked. But events keep happening, characters keep developing, and Dream cradles his happy ending with the people he got to keep so very close to his chest.
So its like! Techno will support Dream through thick and thin and be civil with his partners, Punz and Sapnap had some rough moments but are buddies, and Sam will never talk to Dream's friends about anything deep, but after years of him genuinely trying to be a good partner, Techno and Sapnap are no longer five seconds away from trying to murder him.
Long answer: I'm trying to pull together some posts that will give detailed explanations of this entire thing. Itll take a bit, but its infinitely easier than the full fic I was trying and failing to write. I'm pulling this timeline from an old post so it might not be completely up-to-date even with my edits, but this is some skeleton stuff I can give that will make things easier for Understanding probably. I'm very sleepy. Here you go.
Timeline for My Own Damn Convenience:
Shady Dubcon Prison sex w/ SamDream
Prison Escape
Gentle Recovery sex w/ Drunz
Dream decides he has major control issues and is going to fuck Sam to prove he isn't traumatized. Punz thinks this is a terrible decision.
AweSamDrunz sex, complete with a rulebook of things Sam isn't allowed to do (including giving or receiving kisses)
Quackity kidnaps Drunz similar to in the one cut lore thing, offers to let Punz go if they torture Dream (they stab Quackity instead)
Sam rescues them (without Q finding out) and then kidnaps them, where he ties up Punz and gets Dream kisses until they all eventually pass out (Dream gets mild medical attention)
Dream wakes up and unties Punz
SamDrunz has a talk and decides Sam is allowed kisses again
many kinks are discovered
Sam tries (and fails) to get a hobby
Sam builds +30 prisons/boxes/sex dungeons around the server, of various usefulness
Sapnap finds out about the Torture, sees the sex tape, assumes Dream can't consent to the relationship considering Sam was his warden and Sap thinks Punz betrayed him, and takes Dream to a cottage away from everyone to try to protect him. After Sapnap yells at SamPunz, Dream gently informed Sapnap he's going to continue the relationship, and they have an emotional reconciliation that leads to weeklyish meetings between Dreamnap where they can just sit and talk
The Snow Incident
Sam Recovery From The Snow Incident
Oh God The Egg Is Back (Sam locks up Punz and Dream in a bunker for a month out of terror, and doesnt tell them why because he knows it will stress Punz out and Dream could be an idiot and get himself Egged. Punz is pissed but can't argue with that) (Dream could have fixed this all with his admin abilities good god)
They actually deal with the Egg
An Incident Happens (but its like several incidents actually, including Tubbo finding out that Ranboo was working with Dream the whole time)
Failed Finale
Recovery
Eventually grow old and live in a nice little lush cave house called The Box that Sam made
#communication knife au#ask boxed#I really hope this came out coherent#I have a sleep disorder so I'm just. trying and failing to push through 30 levels of exhaustion rn
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Some prompts for ya, I'm thinking ST ships.
Polaroid Camera | Snow | Cold Fingers & Warm Lips
Leather Belt | New Bed Sheets | Chocolate Chip Cookies
Back Seat | River | Camp Trail
These are amazing I'm adding all of these to my tumblr prompt lists for later! My brain is the big sads so this is all like pre smut but there's still some cute shit in there <3 thank you this is just what I needed
❄️Snow | Cold Fingers & Warm Lips💋
Mungrove
AN: I love the idea of billy and eddie being neighbors okay
It’s cold today. And yeah, its always cold in Hawkins in the winter time, but today is like, record breaking cold, like ‘you should be worried about the effects on the planet as a whole,’ cold. It fucking sucks, but by some miracle, the camper still has electricity and heat.
Eddie's warming his extremities in front of a space heater in the living room when there's a sharp series of knocks on his front door.
He opens the door to his new (within the year new) neighbor, California transplant Billy Hargrove, who looks positively frozen on the spot.
“Powers out,” is all he says by way of explanation before shouldering his way inside.
“Oh shit,” Eddie says, looking across the street to the Mayfields/Hargrove's dark trailer. “What about your fami-”
“Motel. They’re fine.”
“Oh. Well, not that I don’t like your company, but uh, what the hell are you doing here?”
“Do you really think I want to be stuck in a fucking motel room with them?”
“Fair point,” Eddie snorts. Red was cool, but he didn't know much about her mom. And he knew too much about Neil. So instead of kicking the man out, he says “Make yourself at home.”
Billy goes immediately for the space heater and pulls his gloveless hands out of his jacket. He’s not wearing anything thicker than that faded brown leather jacket Eddie’s seen him rock at parties and jeans.
“Dude…”
“What?” Billy snaps, rotating his blue, most likely numb fingers in front of the space heater.
“You still haven’t gotten a proper jacket?”
“Didn't think I’d still be here,” Billy replies bitterly. And again, Eddie can't blame him. He knows how much Billy misses California. And how in Billy's twisted mind he misinterprets buying a winter coat as permanent as setting up roots and buying a house in Hawkins.
“Well, you are,” Eddie says, walking over to Billy’s side and flopping down on the ground to his right. “And in addition to that, you're here, so at least let me help.” He reaches out to take Billy’s hands into his own. Gentle, because they were going to hurt once they got circulation again, and started to rub across the palm with his fingers. His fingers are colder than ice, and knowing Billy, they have likely been like this for a while. The thing about Billy is, he only asks for help when he's desperate, and he never, ever uses those words.
Eddie looks over the purple digits again with a frown and brings Billy's hand close to his mouth.
Billy’s yank back was not only predictable but expected.
“What are you doing?” he asks, and while his voice is harsh, angry, his eyes are terrified, searching for any indication Eddie is setting him up for ridicule.
Eddie isn’t. He wouldn’t do that. They’ve already been about as intimate as you can be with a person in the 7 weird months of their new friendship, but that doesnt mean Billy stops being Billy.
“Do you want to lose your fingers?” Eddie asks.
“What?”
“Look at em. That’s not a good color.”
“That’s why I went to the space heater!” Billy defends.
“Suit yourself,” Eddie shrugs, not giving up, but knowing Billy needs to be lured in a very specific way. “Might be kinda hard to jerk off without fingers. Hey! Maybe you could have them amputate the whole thing and get one of those cool hook hands! Wouldn't really solve the jerking off problem though…”
“Oh my GOD,” Billy huffs before shoving his hands back into Eddie’s face. Anything to get him to just stop talking.
Eddie tries not to laugh too hard or boast his victory but he can’t help but feel good knowing the holes in Billy’s defenses.
Eddie takes Billy’s right hand back into his hands and starts to rub across the slightly frostbitten skin.
“Keep your other one near the heater,” he instructs, knowing there's no way he would convince Billy to touch any other part of Eddie’s skin at this stage. Billy does, and Eddie continues rubbing warmth and circulation back into the blonde’s hand. “Let me know when you start to feel it, it’s probably going to hurt.”
“Yeah, I know,” Billy huffs, looking pointedly everywhere but back at Eddie.
“Want to smoke tonight?” Eddie offers, hoping to lighten some of the tension.
“You got some bud?”
“Course I do,” Eddie laughs, rubbing across Billy’s palm. “Can you fold your fingers towards your palm yet?”
Billy turns his palm in Eddie’s hand and folds all of his fingers at the knuckle towards the palm. He winces a little but it's progress from where he started. His fingers are still a darker color than Eddie likes so he cups the folded hand in both of his and lowers his mouth closer. Billy doesnt pull away this time. Instead, he feels Billy’s breath inhale sharply at the same time Eddie exhales localized heat across his fingertips. If he was any closer, he’d be kissing them.
“Eddie…” Billy gasps, quieter than a whisper.
It's not necessarily intimate, but to Billy it must feel it, because his voice cracks the way it only does when he’s heavily, emotionally conflicted about something.
Fortunately for Billy, Wayne comes storming out of his bedroom and into the common area just then. Billy pulls his hands back into his pockets and Eddie sits back on his hands like they hadn’t just been touching.
It's ridiculous really, Wayne knows about Eddie. But still. Billy is always abundantly careful for the sake of his life.
Wayne looks stressed, and Eddie is suddenly worried something awful has happened.
“Everything okay Wayne?”
“Yeah, Claudia Henderson got stuck on her way coming home. She had to walk over a mile in this snow just to call me. I’m gonna go pull her car out, take her home.”
Wayne Munson. Patron Saint, he swears.
“Uh, alright, well, you should be careful too.” Eddie says, because he knows his van sure as hell won’t make it out of the park let alone all the way across town to bail him out if he gets stuck too.
“I’ll be fine Eds,” Wayne says, a little impatient. Though Eddie can’t really blame him. He would hate to have to leave the warm area of his home to brace the snow too. “Be good you two, you hear,” he says, looking specifically at Eddie.
Eddie threw his hands up in a scouts honor and it at least made Wayne laugh. “Yeah yeah.”
-
As soon as Wayne leaves, Billy exhales the tension he’s been holding. His hands seek out Eddie’s now; the back of Billy’s hand smacking Eddie impatiently until he continued the previous warming treatment. It was so goddamn funny and so Billy Hargrove Eddie bursts out laughing.
“You're ridiculous,” Eddie says, taking Billy’s other hand and resuming his previous actions.
“Whatever, you're into it.” Billy says, a little mean, but then he smirks and Eddie just about melts in place.
“I uh, I didn't offer this before because of Wayne, but-”
Billy can already read the writing on the wall and smirks as Eddie starts to move closer. The musician climbs into the blonde’s lap, taking each of Billy’s still chilled hands and moving them under his Hellfire shirt towards his stomach. As soon as his icy digits touch soft skin Eddie gasps, loud as the chill freezes him to the bone. It doesn't take long to melts into something so much hotter though. Billy’s hands move across his skin grip just above the top hem of his jeans. He squeezes tight, holding Eddie right where he wants him.
“Fuck me,” Eddie pants, because it really is cold, but he loves Billy’s hands on him. Any way he can get them.
“Funny,” Billy purrs, pulling Eddie closer as he starts an array of sharp nips up Eddie’s neck, “I was just thinking the same thing.”
“Please, Billy,” Eddie pants and that’s all it takes. Billy stands and lifts them both off of the leather sofa, holding Eddie against his body as he walks back into his bedroom, sharp teeth finally making contact with the meat of his neck.
#mungrove#st prompts#i loved these thank you so much#eddie munson#billy hargrove#mungrove ficlet#eddie x billy#find me on ao3#sunwarmed ash#links in pinned#i post new stuff every sunday#sinful sunday#stranger things#you can also find all my ST fics on my pinned link
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"Diamonds and Doughnuts"
*this fic is a gift for one of my awesome internet big sisters @afterdarkprincess ! It involves her and yours truly! (I'm mentioned) I just wanna say thank you for being so supportive of my stuff and being the big sister I needed... I love you*
“Oh my gosh I'm so excited!” Tay says happily as she tries to not drop the tray. She sets the tray of doughnuts on the counter and turns off the oven. She grabs the can of pink frosting and a butter knife so she can decorate. As she slathers on the frosting, she doesn't notice a pair of strong arms wrap around her waist. “Watcha making diamond?” Jey says causing Tay to yelp.
“Jey! Don't scare me! You almost made me mess up!” Tay says with a pout causing Jey to laugh. “I'm sorry, babygirl! I'm just wondering what you making” Jey says as he kisses Tay's cheek. “Well, I'm making doughnuts cause my sister is coming over!” Tay says happily. “Lil doughnut is coming over?” Jey asks curiously. “Yeah! We haven't hung out in a bit and I know she loves it when I make her doughnuts” Tay says with a smile.
“Is that why you asked me to invite Sami over?” Jey says with a smirk causing Tay to blush. “N-No that's not the reason at all!” Tay stutters while looking away at Jey. Jey grabs her chin and makes Tay look into his eyes. “You tryna play cupid diamond?” Jey says, causing Tay to blush immensely. “M-Maybe…” Tay says nervously. Jey kisses Tay deeply and pulls back and smiles. “You cute when you blush” Jey says sweetly.
“T-Thank you! Now enough sweet talk! I gotta finish these doughnuts and if you ain't gonna help get your ass out the kitchen!” Tay says seriously as she goes back to decorating. “Yes ma'am!” Jey says as he grabs a butter knife and helps decorate. Tay just laughs as she watches her husband try some of the frosting. “Damn! Lil doughnut got some taste!” Jey says happily.
“Only the best for Mackenzie! Anytime I went to 7-Eleven I'd get these doughnuts for her and she'd just light up! Seeing her smile means I did something good enough to make her day special” Tay says with a gentle smile, thinking happily about the memory. Jey smiles at hearing his wife talk about her sister, remembering the good times he had with his brothers and Roman as well. They were almost done frosting the doughnuts when Jey thought of something…
“Diamond… do you think setting your sister up with Sami is a good idea?” Jey asks nervously. “Yeah why? You don't think so?” Tay asks curiously. “I do! Believe me! I nearly decked Sami sometimes cause he wouldn't stop gushing about her when he sees you take her to some shows and gets to talk to her but are you sure she isn't too crazy for him? Not to mention the age gap…” Jey never finishes his explanation when he sees a butter knife pointed to his chest…
“Jey…” Tay says, seriously causing shivers to go down Jey's spine. “My baby sister isn't crazy! She has adhd which means that she has a lot of energy and maybe being with Sami will help! He always calms her down when she gets hyper or about to attack someone so he already knows how she works! Also she's into older men so the age gap doesn't matter! Don't you forget that there's an almost ten year gap between us?” Tay continues.
“I guess you're right and Sami is my best friend so he deserves to be happy and so does Lil doughnut” Jey says with a smile. “I'd known you would come around to it! But if you call my sister crazy again…I'll rip out your insides and eat them while you're still alive… got it?” Tay says menacingly and receives a rapid nod from her husband. “Good! Now can you get me the rainbow sprinkles?” Tay says with a smile.
“You are wicked hot when you threaten me…” Jey says with a blush. “You are extremely weird! Now where are the sprinkles?” Tay says with a laugh. “Oh you mean these sprinkles?” Jey says with a smirk as he shows his wife the sprinkles. “Yes! Those! Now gimme!” Tay exclaims as she tries to grab the sprinkles. Jey laughs as he holds the can out of Tay's reach. “Jey, if you don't give me those sprinkles you're sleeping on the couch for a week!” Tay says with a pout.
“Ok ok diamond! You're just so cute when you pout!” Jey says as he kisses Tay's cheek. Tay grabs the sprinkles and finishes decorating the doughnuts. “Yay! They're done!” Tay says happily. Jey walks over and looks at his wife's handiwork. “Damn they look good! Makes me wanna eat them all!” Jey says which causes Tay to give him a look. “Don't even think about it mister! These are for Mackenzie and your future brother-in-law!” Tay says happily.
“You right… I'd rather have something sweeter!” Jey says as he gives kisses all over Tay's face. “J-Jey stop!!!” Tay says while laughing. Jey stops and kisses Tay deeply. “I love you so much diamond” Jey says sweetly. “I love you too Mr. Main Event” Tay says back. Jey was about to say something back until they heard rapid knocking on the door. “Looks like Lil doughnut is here” Jey says with a laugh. “It's showtime!” Tay says as they set their matchmaking plan into action.
#my sister is better than yours and you know it#i hope you love it#jey uso#doughnut worthy fic#fic doughnut#daily doughnut#darkness and doughnuts
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Happy Meal
Hawks / Keigo Takami X Reader
-As a young mother YN didn't know what to do when the number 2 hero had taken the last happy meal that her son so desperately want.
Chapter 18: Still A Child
That night Hawks managed to calm the child and explain his new found quirk. He was extremely scared of it. Tsunagu had made him the gloves as soon as he saw what the child had done.
He broke... or desintegrated might be a better word... Ronald Mcdonald.
After Sato calmed and got reassurance, he slept and was taken home. Endeavour came with what you can only assume his entire agency or maybe city with the number of people, all of which signed up for the fight.
Hawks grabbed Toshinori and Enji and pulled them away from the crowd.
"Sato surfaced another quirk." The two looked at each other... "Its the worst one..."
"What do you mean?" Toshinori asked.
"Shigaraki's..."
Hawks nodded.
"You mean the crumbling one?!" Toshinori coughed blood.
"He disintegrated McDonald's. "
"What was the other quirks he's surfaced?"
"Flight or levitation I'm not sure, his mother's quirk which is a booming voice. He can also force someone to use their quirk... he did it with his mom, and now disintegration..."
Toshinori flinched, "Force quirk activation... that's All for One's quirk..."
Hawks froze.
"YN said, AFO was picking between her and Shigaraki to carry the quirk. He's been dosing them both with his quirk. Maybe that's why Sato..."
"The child might have All For One..."
"I don't know what all for one is." Toshinori and Hawks proceeded to explain to Enji what was very important about that.
"Bring him with us." Enji nods.
"Are you crazy?! No! He's like not even 10 years old i dont care what explanation you were gonna make thats just stupid! He can be stronger than all 3 of us at once but he's still a child."
The three continued to talk about a plan. Up till night and then they separated because tomorrow is the day when it will all end.
Tomorrow is the day you're coming back.
He got Sato who slept peacefully and went back to his home for sleep. He held the boy closer to him and kissed his head.
"After all these. I'm going to protect you and make sure nothing happens. To the both you and your mom."
He was settling down when a knock echoed. "Bird-boy come here its important."
Slowly scooting away from the kid, careful not to wake him up. He goes out of the room to see Rumi and Enji.
"What's up?"
"HPSC," Enji states.
"They made an interview. News spread quick."
"Fuck... So they made public about Y/N and Sato?"
Rumi nodded. "They're not going to have a normal life here anymore..."
"Hawks, the good news is so far no one had contact me backing out from the plan."
"I dont care. I'm going there tomorrow no matter what." He pulls out his phone to scroll through the media. "I'm just... worried for Sato and Y/N..."
Enji pats Hawks back, "get some rest. We came here only to let you know. Tomorrow you need all your energy."
Hawks nodded at the two who exits the home. Upon being left alone he crumbles. Biting his lip, deep breaths through his nose.
"Tomorrow it'll be over."
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Moon Dust
You wanted more from him, everything really..
More Chapters | MASTERLIST
4. The Promise
*Mature, Explicit, NSFW*
Din Djarin x fem.reader
Word Count: 4.2k
A/N: Had a lot of fun doing this one, hope you enjoy it as much as I did!
You woke up noticing that the warrior was no longer at your side. Confused, you pulled yourself from the ground and grabbed your cape. Tying it around your neck, to cover yourself from the cold morning air. The sun was already up but the sky was still cloudy, making the world a little gray. Hearing all sorts of noises coming from inside the ship, you decided to take a closer look.
What is he doing now.. you wondered.
As you stepped in, you saw the place all cleaned up. Almost as if the wreckage never happened. After a moment, you saw the men I beskar come out of a room, looking in your direction, "Good you're awake, I repaired the shower and fixed some things.” Taking a bar of ration before handing it to you. "Here breakfast" he said, going back to move some things around while you tried to open it. He continued to speak to you while remaining focused, "I used my jet this morning to have a look around. I couldn't see any signs of others. It appears that we're alone here." He paused, straightening his back before looking straight at you. "The ship's navigation system was hit pretty badly, we can't fly with it." He proceeded, turning his helmet towards another door. "You can sleep there." saying as he points at it.
You were still confused, with half a bite still in your mouth, you asked, "we’re stuck here?" not removing your eyes from him.
He nodded in confirmation, "I'm going to continue working on the ship. The electrical can be fixed. We could use the ship as shelter. The water is taken from the humidity in the air before being filtered. Until we find another way out. This planet is, for the time being, our home..”
The realization made you overwhelmed. All the air in the world seemed to have disappeared and you couldn't remember how to breathe. Not able to keep your eyes to stay focus, you ran outside as quickly as you possibly could. Having this cold and stabbing feeling in your chest. You stumbled on your feet as you felt dizzy, walking to your stuff still laid out on the ground near the firepit.
He had followed you out. Looking at you the way you had previously looked at him, concerned and powerless.
I have to see my brother..
You tried to anchor yourself, falling to your knees before placing your hands on the log in front of you. As he walked towards you, you began to shiver. Talking low to yourself "I can't.. I promised, I can't stay here.."
Kneeling at your side, he took your arm, bringing you closer to him and up to his chest. Holding you still as you started to cry. You couldn't help but fall into his arms. Letting your body be numb for him to move around and make you more comfortable. After a moment of just letting yourself to be held. You felt the cold of the beskar but also the warmth coming from the fabric of his clothing.
Stuffy nose and eyes made of glass. Your gaze was stuck on his arm brace. Starring, trying to come back from the emotions. He didn't need to speak, and you appreciate the silence, although you did feel like you owed him an explanation since he gave you his.
You talked low and slow.. "To be in the clan you have to pass a test. My father sent my brother and I to training with other younglings. Preparing us for the test when we are of age. I knew it had to do with tactical and defense but, I wasn't prepared for what they put us through. Me and my brother were extremely close, doing everything together. They put us in all sorts of scenarios and probabilities and I quickly discovered I was athletic and got praised for my skills. They made us fight until we couldn't stand anymore. Sometimes I thought I was going to pass out."
He squeezed you in slightly, feeling him breathing deeper as you continued; "my clan.. we endured so much together, we grew up together, and were there for one another. My clan is my family."
"Then why did you ran from them?" he asked in his low, soft, modulated voice.
“When we took the test, we were told that part of it was the training. To see if we were made to be warriors. The last test was a fighting tournament, choosing the clan's next leader. After hours of combat, me and my brother were finalists. I will never forget the look in his eyes when I laid my knife on his throat, making me the next clan leader.
He tilted his helmet down to you, "Wasn't that a good thing?"
You shook your head, "My clan hasn't seen a female leader since.. Well, actually never. From that day, he turned cold on me and to the world. When my little brother was old enough to take the test, Rylan he.. when we were training..”
"Rylan killed your younger brother?"
You took a deep breath, "I was there that night. We were on a planet just like this one, full of trees and rivers. I was supposed to meet Yusa to help him with the training but when I had eyes on him, I saw my little brother near the cliff we were supposed to meet up. Rylan pushed him off, down the cliff and ran away. The thing is my brother didn't know that there was an under edge to the cliff. I used to train often there with another clan members. I knew there was no real danger, but Rylan didn't know that."
His body stayed still as he passed his fingertips on your shoulder, "He's alive then? So.. why leave?"
"My father was scared that his need for power would make him kill Yusa. My mother took care of it, sending him away without telling anyone where he was for his own safety. My father, being also scared of me, did the same. Marrying me off to a prestigious name given by no other than my older brother himself. Thinking it would calm things.. but the man was horrible. Thank you for killing him by the way.."
"You're welcome." He replied, "so you needed me to take you without anyone knowing you were going to join your younger brother?" Tilting his helmet on its side while staring down at you, still in his arm.
You nodded, "That's correct. My mother was planning to send me to the same place. Training him to be a fighter as well. Living away from all this."
You could feel him despite the armor, steady breaths calming you down. You finally looked up to him as he looked down on you. Pushing a strand of hair out of your face, using the back of his gloved finger to dry off some of the tears on your cheek, sighing deeply, "My job is to protect you and bring you safely to your destination. I promise to do everything within my abilities to make it true."
The reality was, he didn’t have a choice. You had bewitched him since the day he came back to nevarro. You were all he could think about. And now with this new given information, he wanted you safer than ever before. He knew they would come to find you and try to bring you back. Especially if you were meant to be their clan leader. He didn't know you that much, but he knew that protecting you was the right thing to do.
__
As the day came to an end, you began moving into your quarters. Dropping your bag on your new bed, you let out some sleeping clothes, laying them on the covers.
“I’m going to use the fresher, the water is working you said?” stating more than asking.
You could see him from the opened ramp. Sitting on the log in front of the fire pit outside.
“Yes, I’ve placed a new bar of soap on the counter for you.” He responded, turning his helmet towards you. He sighed hearing the door of the fresher being closed. Fixating on the flames in front of him. He figured you guys were somewhat safe here. They would never suspect you to still be this close to them. You haven’t been long enough in hyperspace to be far but, they didn’t know that. They also wouldn’t suspect you to be on a planet with literally nothing on it. And it gave him some brief peace of mind before his mind began to play tricks on him. Imagining your naked body still damp from the shower, dripping on him. He grunted, trying to think about, well, something else...
__
After you put some clothes on, you started to prep the ship for the night. Closing the ramp and some unnecessary lights. Moving to the open kitchen to clean around a bit, seeing the door of the fresher not completely closed shut as you heard him move inside.
“No, I can’t look..” telling yourself as you investigate the light gap.
Moving closer, you saw the light of the fresher over the mirror and only a part of the sink. When suddenly you have the side of his butt cheek coming into frame. Instinctively you closed your eyes. “I can’t..” you reminded yourself. “He took a creed, whatever that means..” Except, your curiosity was stronger than your will, opening one eye slowly...
Noticing his tan glowing skin from the fresher’s light. Moving your gaze upwards, you could see his arm muscles more clearly. Contracting as he barely moved. You examined the scars on his body from various past injuries. He looked firm but there’s was a softness to him. Something more human perhaps, move vulnerable. Maybe it was in the way he moved, as if every movement had a distinct purpose. You were starting to feel shame and guilt as a tightness formed in your chest, turning quickly around to go back into your room.
But you weren’t quick enough, as the door of the fresher opened, and instantly feel your heart drop to your stomach.
You heard his modulated voice coming from behind, “Are you okay?” he asked worryingly.
What kind of six sense is this?
You turned around slowly to face him. You could see him clear as day. A hand on the door and the other one holding the towel on his waist. You noticed his broad shoulders, his chest defined and his muscular arms that could kill a man without a sweat. He had his helmet on, looking straight at you.
You couldn’t find the words to speak. Feeling intimidated by the sight of him. Not knowing where to look, you start speaking nervously, “Yes, I am, thank you. I was going to sleep actually...” you let out now staring at the floor.
“Good” he replied as his body relaxes. “Tomorrow we should go explore some grounds.”
You agreed, nodding, “Goodnight Mandalorian.”
As you turned back around, he lowered his gaze to the ground, “nite..”
You gave him a little smile before moving away. Closing the door behind you as you moved onto your bed. You couldn’t stop thinking about the almost naked man that was in front you, grand and glowing from the fresher’s light, standing there just staring at you. You felt that pinching in your chest again. I can’t, he can’t.. That would never happen..
__
Morning came and you were feeling already better than yesterday. Going down the ramp you saw your new roommate coming back to the ship’s camp.
“Good morning.” you greeted him.
He looked at you while walking closer, “You’re awake.. brought some fruits I found.”
“You found all of this, this morning?” looking inside the cloth bag.
He took a moment before talking. “I figured you’d want some variety. Haven't found vegetables yet...”
You can’t help but smile at him. “Thank you, that’s very thoughtful.” before grabbing a green and orange fruit out of it. “Are you not eating?”
“I ate not long ago. I couldn’t sleep... I–” He cuts himself off. Staying still, staring at you while you ate. After a moment you looked up to him, raising an eyebrow. Realizing he’s fixating, he moved quickly. moving his gaze away, now looking straight to the ground. Talking to himself in a low voice as he went back onto the ship.
He didn’t know how to act around you anymore. No one had ever seen him the way you saw him yesterday. The way you were looking at him, the look in your eyes... He knew what you were thinking about. He also couldn’t stop thinking about the feeling of your presence in his arms, holding you close to his chest and how he wanted so badly to have it again.
You look at him moving away confused. You were starting to enjoy his company but understood that he might still be shaken by the current circumstances. By contrast, the rigid man had a warmth to him. You felt safe in his presence, and you knew he wanted your well-being as much as you wanted his.
Finishing your fruits, you threw the seed into the fire pit before moving inside the ship to change.
__
You came back in your combat outfit and your tactical backpack with all your necessities, food, water and some change of clothes. You never truly know how these explorations can go. No choice than packing for a couple of days.
You saw him near the camp, being also ready to leave. Watching him put his spear behind on his back. Remaining silent, he began to walk inside the forest and you followed right behind.
There was a moment where none of you were speaking but you didn’t mind it too much. You didn’t even know where you’re going, you just followed his lead. Hearing the sky rumbling while turning gray, as you looked to the man in beskar move in front of you. Wanting so badly to be closer to him. You sighed as you looked away.
He stops, anchored in place as you passed him. “Are you okay?”
You froze a little, you’ve been silent for hours now. You looked to the ground not knowing what to say. “Yes, I'm okay, thank you.”
He doesn’t move, so you turned your head to him, “Did I do something? What’s wrong?” not understanding why he’s still unmoved.
“You, what’s wrong?” he demanded with a soft modulated voice.
You’re taken aback, not knowing how to respond, you began to panic, not wanting him to worry about you. “I’m fine I told you, can we move on, please?” You can’t exactly say that it’s him who makes you feel this way now can you?
He tilts his head on its side before looking around. “Come,” he said as he changed path.
“Where are we going?” frowning your eyebrows, but he didn’t reply.
After a while, you see a small cave inside of what seemed like a cliff. Greenery surrounding it and vines covering the outside walls.
“This will do just fine.” Stating as he walked forward to the side of it. He looked at you before he stopped, “We can camp here tonight. I see you’re not all here today; we've had a rough couple of days, let’s not push ourselves. We can continue tomorrow.” He says and you nodded in agreement.
You entered the cave to have a look inside. Nothing much going on, it’s not only empty, but also quite small, but for tonight it will do. It will give you shelter for the rain that’s coming.
You turned to go back out when you saw him coming to the entrance with some wood.
“It will start to rain soon better be prepared. I grabbed some for tomorrow as well.” Moving to put them inside the cave.
As he passed in front of you, you couldn’t help but smell him. Spices, leather and beskar. You looked up closing your eyes as you questioned the maker on how long this feeling was going to last.
__
The sky was getting dark when the rain started. You were waiting in the cave for him to come back. He told you he would return quickly but it had been a moment since he had left. Making you begin to worry, wondering what could take this long.
After a moment you can’t take it anymore. Tying your cape around your neck, you put your hood on. As you walked out you could barely see anything as it started to pour, limiting your visibility. You tried to call him, moving around. “Mandalorian!? Man ..Mandalorian!!?”
Still blinded by the rain, you heard a stumping sound before an arm grabbed you by your waist, just like the first time he touched you. Without hesitation, he moved you to the cavern. Covering you as much as he could with his body. The questions started as soon as you were inside.
“Are you okay? Are you hurt??” he asked nervously, looking at you from every angle.
You’re embarrassed, walking back into the wall behind you staring at the ground. “No, I- I'm fine. I just worried. You didn’t come as quick and, I-“
He stopped you in your ramble. His body tensing in contrast to his low modulated voice. “You were scared...”
You nodded, not wanting to look into his visor, which felt almost like a confrontation, but you opened your mouth, “I’m sorry, I should’ve stayed put, like you asked. I just panicked. It usually never happens. It won’t happen again “
You tried to control your breathing as he pushed a strand of hair, damp and sticking to the side of your face.
“You never need to apologize to me, cyare.” Letting his fingertips glide along the side of your neck. Realizing what he’s doing, he straightens his back, letting out a short cough before moving his hand away as he goes to sit on the floor.
You followed, grabbing a blanket from your bag and spreading it on the floor. You invited him to sit next to you. He lit up a stable flame, moving it across the cave before he came to the blanket. Sitting next to you on the ground with his back resting against the wall.
“Where are we going exactly?” you asked as you spread your cape over your bag to let it dry.
He continued to look straight in front of him as he answered you. “I saw a lake when I used my jetpack a few days ago. Thought we might find something interesting.” He moved his helmet to you when he noticed you were not making a noise. As he looked closer, he didn’t miss the way your eyes looked lost. He knew the situation was unique, but he also had been in worst situations, and so did you, he’d imagined. “Are you ok?”
You felt tired and exasperated. “Yes, I'm fine Mandalo–”
“Din, please.” Cutting you off before looking away as quickly. You stared at him with surprised eyes before he continued. “My name is Din, Din Djarin..” You stayed silent as he turned back to you. “Do- do you, have a name?” nervously asking as he didn't know how to approach you.
“I don’t.” you answer honestly. “My parents gave us nicknames until we were of age, giving the clan power to name us according to our strengths. I prefer to forget about it since I'm not going back.” Answering with your voice breaking. You moved lower, using a piece of clothing as a pillow and he does the same, lying on his back next to you.
As you moved on your side, face away from him. You could hear his breathing as the tightness in your chest came back. He moved slightly, now facing your back. You felt your hair being pushed out of its way, not wanting to tug it while sleeping.
After a moment you sensed him move around. Trying to stay calm and focused, you kept your eyes closed, feeling gloveless fingers softly caressing the side of your neck. Sending this electric sensation into your breasts as he passed them below your ear. Your breathing becoming more present, you remained still as he came to press himself closer to your body.
Moving the tips of them to your shoulder, to your back and to the side of your stomach. He goes to grab you by the waist as he moved his chest deeper into your back. Bringing his hips slightly closer as you felt his hardness on you. He went under your shirt, taking his hand higher to your breast as he caresses the underside of it. You could hear him, breathing heavily, going upwards to fully take it in his palm. You let out a pleasured sound, head moving slightly back.
He squeezed it softly before moving it down towards the inside of your pants. At this point all you could think of was him, touching you, wanting everything he was willing to give you. You wanted more from him, everything really. His fingertips came cautiously to your clit. Making you instantly melt at the sensitivity as he moved them slowly. You let out some pleasured sounds as he groaned, moving his hips and taking his time grinding on your curves.
“You’re soft, so..." Saying as he moved his digits lower between your folds.
Feeling the slick already dripping, he couldn’t stop himself from letting out a desperate humming noise. You couldn’t take it anymore as you felt his digits softly brushing and teasing around your entrance. The need was making you blind with lust as you turned around to face him. You sit to remove your shirt and he grabbed your arm, taking you closer to him as soon as you were done. Moving your legs on each side of his hips. You anchored yourself over him starting to grind on his already harden length, hearing him grunt low as he watched you move on him.
You looked desperate for him, but you didn’t care. His hardness feeling like ecstasy on your needy pussy, long and sturdy just for you.
With a hand on the side of your thigh, he took his other one to grab your breast, pressing and massaging it. Naturally, you let out a deep, opened mouth moan as the feeling intensifies. Meanwhile, his breathing was becoming short and harsh.
“You look.. oah, so beautiful cyare..” admiring you, moving his hips with yours.
He let go of your tit to grab both of your thighs. Stopping them in their movements and starts lifting his hip upwards as he rubbed his thickness on your sensitive clit over the fabric. The pleasure starting to feel unbearable, you began to whine. Making him move quicker, faster and harder against you. Watching you push out his new favorite sounds as he starts panting.
You put your hands on the wall behind his head to make you more stable, but he grabs one of them. Pulling you lower closer to him. He places a hand on your lower back pushing down as he continues to move and grind himself on you. Hearing the pleasure being louder in your voice. He pushed you down to his chest, holding you tight as he moved slower while making sure the pressure was right.
You let your head fall into his neck. Smelling him, so warm and inviting as one of his arms wrapped around your waist, locking you in. While his other hand holds the back of your head. You took a finger to move his scarf a bit, giving you access to some skin. Pressing your tongue flat on it, going from one side to the other and swirling your tongue around, sucking lightly.
He chuckled while panting harder. “A’ohh.. This can’t be real..” you heard him say deep through his modulator
You don’t have time to speak before an electric light comes inside you. Making you come on his clothed dick, whining like you already belong to him. The sweet sounds pushed into his ear made him grunt as he came over the edge as well. Slowing down his movements, he pets the back of your head while holding you in place. Both staying unmoved, catching your breath.
You swallowed before speaking. “What can’t be real?”
Trying to regulate his breathing, he took a moment before answering in a raspy voice, “You.”
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