#(all ik is ranchers?)

[skadoodle-with-extra-ification]

Inspired by I'm Not Looking for Perfection/I'm Not Offering a Saint by @watcheraurora! This fic is SO GOOD OMG

I read chapter 10 and... Deepfrost Tango in white..... yeah...

ft Jimmy having a crisis and enjoying some cocoa

[anxietygremlin7]

blaze-hybrid Tango giving Jimmy head

call that a

*blowtorch*

[two-person-job]

i WANT to write the wind rises kavexis au. i WANT to write about pokemon au for my selfships. but. slime rancher calls. slime rancher calls, and it says "look shroom. look at your lovely mosaic tangle largos. you need to find the nightshade secret style for your tangle slimes, shroom. why don't you do that? why don't you also do some quests for viktor, while you're at it, and unlock his lab?" slime rancher tells me to play for a bit and then i check how long i've been playing and it's been 150 minutes and it's 1 20pm and I haven't had lunch yet

[fashionteahouse]

Could I do one where the reader and Paul are best friends and anything Paul does he and the reader do and when he needs someone the she’s the first person to call Rachel gets jealous but then she sees they have a sibling relationship so now it’s then three of them doing things together. Paul gets a call from reader and the she says bitch I got tea rancher comes running from the room saying what happened lol. The reader could be dating embry

ooo yes ! hope you enjoy :)

it’s nice to have a friend - paul x reader

>>part two

It was just something that happened. But both of you were glad it happened.

The friendship transpired when Paul tried to be funny, roasting those who were around him. He thought it was a good idea, to try his jokes on you, only to be destroyed by your sharp tongue.

Instead of feeling offended, like the people who took his words to heart, he admired your quick wit.

You two became close without trying to be.

“This is her.” he says. The phone glowed with a beautiful girl smiling back at you.

You nod at the picture as you mused, “How did you pull her?”

He rolls his eyes before tucking the phone back into his pocket, “I’m just like that.”

This made you laugh as you say, “Yeah, right.”

“I know you’re not talking miss ‘oh my god, what if Embry doesn’t like me?’ I had to break the ice.” he says.

“Okay first of all, you know I’ve had a crush on Embry since like forever. At least I’m not corny with my pickup lines.” you say with your finger up.

“At least I’ve got game. You on the other hand…uh…” he says with a grimace and you smack his arm.

Because you did this, he steals a fry. You narrow your eyes at him but he eats it obnoxiously to make you even more annoyed.

You were blurry eyed as you rubbed your eyes. You picked up your phone with a squint as it was in the middle of the night. Seeing it was Paul, you just put the phone faced down and laid back down, choosing not to answer.

The phone vibrated again. You groan and shake your head.

You declined. You saw recent texts from Paul.

“Y/N”

“Ik ur awake”

“ANSWER”

“😑”

The phone buzzes in your hand. Paul was calling. Again. Swiping over, you hiss, “What?”

“About fucking time. What if I was dying?”

“Paul, are you dying?” you ask in the most driest voice.

“No, you never answer.” he exaggerates.

“What’s so important that you’re waking me out of my sleep?”

“I wanted to tell you how my date with Rachel went.” he says softly and immediately you smirk.

“Aww, caught the love bug?” you tease at his sappy voice.

“Shut up. Anyway, we did a little picnic in the field. She liked it a lot. She even let me kiss her when I dropped her off at home.” he says.

“Nice. Did you get her any flowers?” you ask.

The phone was silent and you looked at the phone but he was still on the line.

“Hello?” you say into the line.

“You have to come with me to get her some then. I have no idea what she would like!” He says stressing.

“Why do I have to go?” you groan.

“Because, I need your help! I introduced you to Embry so you owe me.” he says.

“Ugh, fine.” you say.

Once you had gotten sleep, you walked and smelled flowers with Paul looking around.

“What do you think she would like?” he asks.

“I don’t know. She’s not my girlfriend. How do you not know what she would like?” you say and pick up a pretty bouquet of flowers. The appearance and the scent alone would make her love the ones you picked.

Paul looks at the ones you have in your hand and nods, “Yeah, I’m getting those.”

You clear your throat as you and Paul ride back to his place.

“Is something in your throat? What’s wrong with you?” he asks.

“Thank you, Y/N.” you say and he rolls his eyes, “I didn’t give them to her yet. I’m not saying thank you until she tells me she loves them.”

You shake your head as he looked at the shirt he put on through the mirror.

“What?” he asks.

“It’s wrinkled.”

“I’m seeing Rachel, not going to court.” Paul says.

You get up and look through his closet. You pull out a better shirt and hold it to him and tell him, “Put this on.”

“What’s wrong with this one?” He asks about the shirt he already had on.

“It’s ugly.” you say and shrug.

He changes and you tilt your head and he huffs out an annoyed sigh.

“Would you relax? I’m helping you get ready for your woman.” you say at his impatience.

His phone then rings and he answers. The sappy smile is stretched onto his face.

“Yeah. I’m on my way.” He says into the phone and hangs up without wiping the smile off his face. Rachel called with a change of plans and had invited him over instead of going out.

“Whipped.” you mumble.

A pillow hits you on the side of your head before you hit him back with it.

Before you get out of his car, you turn to him.

“Don’t say anything stupid.” you say as he has one hand on the steering wheel. The delicate flowers were snug in the backseat. He reached to place them next to him in the passenger seat.

“Okay, I’m pulling off now.” he says.

The second date went well. Rachel took the flowers and smelled them and hugged him. He silently thanked you in his head. When she went to put them in a vase, he texted you.

“She liked them. Thanks ”

“And then you have to tell me how much of a great best friend i am”

You type back.

He responds.

“Ntm :/ ”

You put a thumbs down on his text, but you were happy for him.

As you snicker at his groan from his favorite team losing, yours was winning. Your team scored a touchdown and you bet him on this game because you knew how nail biting it would be.

You wished Embry was here to see this in live action but he was currently on patrol.

Paul gets up and grabs a drink and you tell him to bring you one.

“I should shake it up.” he says as he hands you a cold soda can.

“If you do, I’ll make it explode on your face.” you say before taking a sip. He tilts the bottom of your can a little, making you cough. Luckily no soda was in your mouth to make you spit it out from coughing, but you still glare at his amused face.

“Should I invite Rachel over? The game’s almost over.” he says. The clock only had three minutes left of the game.

“Yeah.” you say and stick your hand out. He fished in his pocket to pull out his phone and the money you had won.

Paul opened the door when she knocked and he greets her. You quietly snicker at his nervousness.

Rachel is surprised to see you on the couch. You wave and smile, “You must be Rachel.”

“Who else would she be?” Paul says.

Rachel says hello to you and you tell her name.

Rachel was a bit quiet. Paul noticed and tried to get her to talk more. She felt like competition was in the room. Paul’s laughs came easily and she wanted to know how it felt to be the one that made him react to her jokes. You were comfortable on his couch. She felt like you were too comfortable.

“Are you hungry?” Paul asks Rachel. She nods but kisses Paul. In front of you, she makes sure to linger her lips longer on his.

You weren’t really paying attention to the action.

“I mean for food.” Paul says and chuckle. She nods again.

“I can cook you something to eat.” he says.

You stand up.

“Let me cook for you guys.” you say with a smile.

“She’s my girlfriend. Let me cook for her.” he says.

“Rachel, do you like burned food?” you ask her and she couldn’t help the small laugh that escaped.

At Paul’s table, the air was less tense. Rachel watched in amusement as Paul pretended to not like your food all like that but he was clearing his plate.

As Paul went on a quick trip to the bathroom, Rachel asked you as you sat next to her on the couch, “How long have you known Paul?”

“Since forever.” you answer.

“So, have you two ever…Dated?” Rachel asks.

“Ugh, no.” you say automatically with slight disgust but you pause and look to Rachel and say, “Shit, sorry. It’s just the thought of me and Paul is like…” you shudder a little and this makes her crack a smile.

“What did you do to Rachel?”

You read Paul’s text as you lounged at your home.

“Told her to stay away from you.”

“Lies. She’s with me and she asked me to invite you to come with us 😒”

“Omg she did? XD”

“This was my one day away from you.”

“Suck it :)”

Paul watched as you and Rachel’s arms were linked and he could barely get a word in.

“I feel like the third wheel of my own relationship.” he says as he followed you both through the town’s carnival.

“You’re so dramatic.” you say as you steered Rachel to a game.

“Its nice to have a friend.” Rachel says to Paul as you both picked up the water guns for the game ahead. You hold your gun steady as the water shoots into the clown’s mouth.

You give your prize to Rachel.

Paul sees your name on his phone and he answers.

“What do you want?” he asks in a playful tone.

“Facetime me.” you say. He does.

You shake your head in the camera. He chuckles a bit.

“You’re stupid.” he says.

“Bitch, I got tea.” you say and you immediately have his attention.

Rachel comes in and flops next to Paul.

“What? I want to know!” she says and hogs the phone.

You and Embry were waiting in line at a movie theater. A couple behind you was waiting as well. It wasn’t until another woman stalks up the man, demanding, “What is this?!” She hits him as she realizes that he had taken another woman on a date to the movies.

“Oh, you should’ve been there. It was hilarious.” You say while laughing and wiping a stray tear out of the corner of your eye. Rachel laughs, you described the situation so well, she was able to imagine being there in that moment.

[mcytshipmadness]

I desperately miss flower husbands

Like genuinely, I want them back.

I get it, ranchers is funky (/pos) and wholesome and all

But I kind of hate the fact that pol just like... left flower husbands completely and now ppl call it toxic.

Ik there are still flower husbands shippers out there, obviously, but like... yk what I mean?

And I've seen someone say before in refute to the whole "guys it's a block game, it's rily not toxic to hit someone in a BLOCK GAME" saying that: "yeah, it's a block game, so why did u call them husbands?"

DID YA'LL FORGET THAT SCOTT STARTED IT?? DID YA'LL FORGET THAT SCOTT STARTED THE

"husband" PART OF IT?? HAD SCOTT NOT SAID

"nope, we're married now" (or whatever he said idk I'm dying rn yextkctixitxt) WHEN JIMMY GAVE HIM THE POPPY WE PROB WOULDNT HAVE CALLED THEM FLOWER HUSBANDS. HAD SCOTT NOT LITERALLY SCREAMED "NOO MY HUSBAND!" WHEN JIMMY DIES FOR THE SECOND TIME, DO U THINK WE WOULD HAVE CALLED THEM HUSBANDS??? DO U??? WE PROBABLY WOULD HAVE CALLED THEM LIKE FLOWER BOYFRIENDS OR SMTH

PLEASERE PEOPLE STOP CALLING THEM TOXIC I SWEAR TO GOD THEY'RE NOT.

LIKE HAVE YOU SEEN EMPIRES SEASON 1????

HAVE YOU SEEN IT??? THEY'RE SO VGTIDTIERSTIDKDKTDKTDOY

Anyway

Sorry for yapping in ur inbox I was feeling a bit emo

Them <3

You're completely, fine, I'm literally here for yapping about ships at XD

But FR, ships will always have their haters, but people completely dropped FH after Double Life.

JUSTICE FOR FLOWER HUSBANDS

[mcytshipsandmore]

I desperately miss flower husbands

Like genuinely, I want them back.

I get it, ranchers is funky (/pos) and wholesome and all

But I kind of hate the fact that ppl just like… left flower husbands completely and now ppl call it toxic.

Ik there are still flower husbands shippers out there, obviously, but like… yk what I mean?

And I’ve seen someone say before in refute to the whole “guys it’s a block game, it’s rlly not toxic to hit someone in a BLOCK GAME” saying that: “yeah, it’s a block game, so why did u call them husbands?”

DID YA’LL FORGET THAT SCOTT STARTED IT?? DID YA’LL FORGET THAT SCOTT STARTED THE “husband” PART OF IT?? HAD SCOTT NOT SAID “nope, we’re married now” (or whatever he said idk I’m dying rn ycxtkctixitxt) WHEN JIMMY GAVE HIM THE POPPY WE PROB WOULDNT HAVE CALLED THEM FLOWER HUSBANDS. HAD SCOTT NOT LITERALLY SCREAMED “NOO MY HUSBAND!” WHEN JIMMY DIES FOR THE SECOND TIME, DO U THINK WE WOULD HAVE CALLED THEM HUSBANDS??? DO U??? WE PROBABLY WOULD HAVE CALLED THEM LIKE FLOWER BOYFRIENDS OR SMTH

PLEASEEE PEOPLE STOP CALLING THEM TOXIC I SWEAR TO GOD THEY’RE NOT.

LIKE HAVE YOU SEEN EMPIRES SEASON 1???? HAVE YOU SEEN IT??? THEY’RE SO VGTIDTIERSTIDKDKTDKTDOY

Anyway

Sorry for yapping in ur inbox I was feeling a bit emo

I am currently watching Empires s1 and yeah I agree. It feels like people sometimes mistake Scott’s teasing for bullying.

-🍫

[fei-scribbles]

i rarely draw/talk about ship stuff but seeing rendoc fanart is making me think (not good)

so uh

LIST OF HERMITCRAFT/LIFE SERIES SHIPS I LIKE BECAUSE THE DUO NAME IS SILLY /pos

no i don't ship all of these and no i won't elaborate 👍

peskyblaze (grian/tango)

aHAsbands (mumbo/martyn)

fried chicken (tango/jimmy - ik ranchers is the more popular name but fried chicken is silly /pos)

doc martyns (doc/martyn - shocker)

homewreckers (impulse/bdubs)

these r just the ones i can think off the top of my head lol

[fizzing-imagines]

Trauma Candy Salad - Stranger Things Edition (Crackfic)

Because God gave me free will, creativity and TikTok

"Hi, my name is Will, I was abducted into an alternate reality, and I brought the bowl."

"Hello, my name is Eleven and I spend my childhood in a laboratory and I brought M&Ms."

"Hi, my name is Mike, I watched at least 50 people be ripped to shreds by demodogs and I brought Sour Patch Kids."

"My name is Dustin, I brought Twizzler Bites and I had to watch one of my brother figures die in my arms."

"I'm Lucas, I watched my girlfriend be nearly killed by Vecna and then had to helplessly watch her as she fought for her life inside her mind, and I brought Nerds."

"Hi, I'm Max and shortly after watching by step-brother be murdered in front of me I was almost killed as well. I brought Reeses Pieces."

"Hello, my name is Nancy and when I was 16 my best friend died while I was making out with my boyfriend at the time and I still blame myself for her death. I brought Jolly Ranchers."

"Hi, I'm Jonathan and when I was a child my father abused me, my mom and my brother. I brought Mike and Ikes."

"I'm Steve, and after I was attacked by demobads that could've killed me, my crush fixed me up while my best friend kept asking about rabies. I brought Swedish Fish."

"My name's Robin, I brought PEZ, and I'm a lesbian in the 80s."

"I'm Eddie, and after I was framed for murder and had to go into hiding, I was killed by demobats and never got to clear my name. I got us gummy bears."

"Hey, I'm Billy. After my abusive father made us move to Hawkins from my hometown, I was possessed by the mindflayer, which forced me to kill people. After all that, I sacrificed myself to save Max's friend. I brought strawberry rings."

"Hi, I'm Joyce and I had to watch my late and current boyfriend die in front of my eyes. I brought sour spaghetti."

"I'm Hopper, I brought bubblegum cigarettes and my daughter died of cancer because I was exposed to Agent Orange."

"Hello, I'm Barb and I was murdered by a supernatural being while I was at a party I didn't want to go to in the first place, and I brought sour gummies."

"Hey everyone, I'm Chrissy and when I went to someone house to buy marijuana, I was brutally murdered while being exposed to all the verbal abuse my mother put me through. I brought Starbursts."

[soft-bugs]

Stress Relief/Calming Distraction/etc. Ideas for Regressors (based on my own experiences and things I've learned from others)

-- FIRST AND FOREMOST,

• Take some deep breaths. I know that's like listening to a broken record and obvs doesn't work for everyone, but it's worth a try!

• Drink some water and put some comfy clothes on and/or wrap your favorite blankie around yourself!

• Put on some soft lighting, if available. Especially if you're overstimulated!

• If you gotta/wanna bodily/vocally stim, DO IT!!! I also like to use stim toys and touch/hug soft things like a blanket, stuffie or pillow.

• If you have a pet, give 'em a cuddle or some pets! (a stuffie is also very comforting!) Or if you have one that can't/doesn't like to be handled/touched, you can just sit and watch them move around (feeding them if needed, can also be fun to watch!) (I love watching my fish swim around/eat sometimes 😹)

• If you're feeling anxious; dip your face in a bowl of cold/ice water, eat something sour or spicy like Warheads sour spray, Sour Patch Kids, Takis or jalapeños, hold something cold like an ice pack against your chest/stomach, try to relax your jaw and shoulders, use stim toys/stress balls

• If you're feeling angry; you can crumple/tear up pieces of paper or an old notebook. Writing down your feelings and/or scribbling rapidly before doing this is good too! You can also punch a pillow or anything soft enough to where you won't hurt yourself. Ik it can be wasteful, but snapping wooden pencils into lil bits was very therapeutic for me for a while! If you happen to have balloons for whatever reason, you can tie one to a rubber band(/string?) and bounce it against your fist like onea these babies:

• From the one above, write out your feelings! Even if it's just "I am feeling _ because _". If you have a hard time finding the words, here's some cool emotion wheels I like to use!:

• If you are on your period, take some painkillers (Midol is a lifesaver!), try to avoid caffeine & nicotine if you smoke, use a heating pad/heated blanket if available, take a hot bath or shower, if possible exercise/walking or certain stretches can help with cramping, and I'm gonna be completely honest here free-bl33ding on the toilet just helps sometimes idk 😂

-- NEXT, DISTRACTIONS:

• If possible, go for a walk or ride your bike around the block!

• If possible, try to talk to/call or text someone you trust, like a friend or family member. You can talk about anything, it doesn't have to be about what's causing your stress/anxiety/etc.

• Watch TV, YouTube, stim GIFs/videos, etc. Whatever helps you relax or laugh!

• Play a calming video game (I like to play Slime Rancher, Animal Crossing, Cooking Mama, Night In The Woods, Webkinz and No Man's Sky on creative mode!)

• Be creative! Even if you think you're "bad" at it bc it doesn't matter if it looks "pretty," you don't have to show anyone or post it anywhere. All that matters is if it makes you feel better! Drawing/doodling and coloring have always been a very great emotional outlet for me! Other fun stuff you could do: Splatter/abstract paint, make a collage or start a scrapbook, make a DIY craft with stuff around your house, SCRIBBLE!!, play around with an instrument or music program/app, design a character on Picrew or some sort of character creator, print out/make paper dolls and their clothes, stickerbomb something, film a music video featuring ur pets/stuffies/toys!

• Continuing the creativity one, make a mood/stim/agere board for yourself, an OC, your fave/comfort characters(s), etc.!

• Do word/number puzzles like word searches, crossword puzzles, sudoku, acrostic puzzles, cryptograms, framework/fill-in puzzles, etc.

• If you like making lists (like me), write out a list! (Ideas: Your comfort characters/movies/shows, your favorite board/video games, favorite places or cool places you've been, interesting animals, favorite bands/musical artists, current favorite songs, etc.)

• If you're like me, you can play some music and write down your favorite lyrics from each song that plays! (And doodle/scribble around the paper borders in between hehe) And/or make a playlist! Maybe make a playlist of songs that make you feel better in that moment, so you can look for it whenever ur stressed/upset!

• If possible, take a hot bath (you can add bubbles, bath bombs and/or toys!) Or a quick shower. Oh, and speaking of, I have a tip for people who struggle with brushing your teeth/remembering to do so! Try brushing your teeth when you shower!

These aren't the only things I do/know about, just ones I can remember at the moment, and they may not all work for everyone of course, but hopefully this is helpful to someone. 🥺 Feel free to add more in the replies/tags/reblogs!

[thegloomybat]

LOW CALORIE DRINKS

I have SO many low calorie drinks, tbh it’s really easy to find them, just search up whatever drink you like and put diet/ sugar free and most of it is almost always <10. Here’s a few examples

The last 2 are on the higher side vs. the first one. They vary in cals tho. I like olipops bc they come in a bunch of different flavors and each can is like $1, and some of them are 30/40 cals. Depends on the flavors. I just like these bc they have tons of probiotics so its good for your gut health and digestion. Yakult is another probiotic drink, it kinda tastes like yogurt it’s good but it has 50 cals and theyre SO tiny.

They have other flavors like cranberry with the same amount of cals, just search up ocean spray zero sugar. Great value also has some good ones if you search up for example sugar free cranberry juice they even have like cherry cranberry lowkey my fav. They have a lot of varieties

I never rlly got these at all but ik theyre really popular and people really like them but i don’t think i ever had it like that bc it has so many cals😭so i was pretty surprised with this

This is just flavored water but it’s SO GOODDD and has electrolytes and minerals. I used to drink hella sugar free gaterades (also 0 cals ) last year bc of mia… but they taste way too much like juice and even tho theyre sugar free theyre a litte too sweet?? But i found out about propel and its perfff its not extremely sweet literally just tastes like flavored water not juice. So good for when i want some flavor but don’t want cals. And it can fill you up since it’s water. They also sell in powder packets.

Ugh theyre only letting me use one more picture, but this is the nutritional information for caprison, before i ever checked i thought it was so much more it’s not as bad as i thought it’d be??? Idk. I have some more low/zero cal drinks. I’ll just write them i’m not tryna make a whole ‘nother post for it😭

Okay so, THIS IS RANDOM BUT I FOUND NERDS AND JOLLY RANCHER DRINK MIX??? zero sugar ofc. The nerds one is 10 cals and the jolly rancher is 5. Lmk if you guys try this im curious😭

1. Any sugar free energy drinks usually have <10 cals, usually 5 or 0. For example red bull has 10, monsters have 5.

2. Millo’s famous sugar free, zero calorie sweet iced tea. It’s in the name so, if you’re a fan there’s that!

3. I think every sugar free soda has 0 cals. There’s 0 cal root beer, sprite, uhh other sodas i can’t think of. Ofc Diet/0 sugar coke.

Again, you can most likely find any drink for <10, if you search them up with sugar free/zero sugar/diet. These are just some ideas if you didn’t know about them.

Once more i found all these on the walmart WEBSITE.

[manicplank]

YO- has anyone asked what their favorite candy is? :00

(I just had cotton candy- AND I NEED TO KNOW NOW- 🍬🍬)

Favorite candy

Peppino: He enjoys caramels. Loves milk duds. Doesn't chew them; he pops one in his mouth and lets it melt.

Gustavo: He likes milk chocolate. He doesn't like dark chocolate as it's too bitter for him.

Mr. Stick: Loves those little rootbeer candies. Has them in a little dish in his desk at work.

Pepperman: Likes the Fun Dip candies. Pours it all over the stick and throws the whole thing in his mouth.

The Vigilante: Loves the spicy cinnamon candies. Also likes sassafras and jelly beans.

The Noise: YES. CANDY. (His favorites are gummy worms/bears, lifesavers, and jolly ranchers.) (He was once taken to the ER for snorting a pixie stick.)

Noisette: She also enjoys candy, but not to Noise's degree. Her favorites are gummy bears and chocolate.

Fake Peppino: He'll eat any candy except the spicy cinnamon ones. He spits those out. He's also not a fan of the green swirl mints.

Pizzahead: He loves those giant circus rainbow lollipops. He also enjoys marshmallows.

Pillar John: Sour candies. Sour patch kids are his favorite. He also likes the warheads.

Gerome: Werther's hard candies and Mike and Ikes.

[phillippaa]

Guys I need to spread life series team ups I need

a lot of these may or may not include Jimmy, anwyaysss

1 - Ranchers again

I miss them tbh 👊👊

2 - Joel Lizzie and Jimmy team up

.. plz.. I NEED IT

3 - EVO gang (Pearl BigB Martyn Grian and Timmy)

Honestly I just want EVO gang I feel like it would be so much chaotic fun

4 - Jimmy Gem and Pearl (or just Jimmy + Gem/Pearl)

Jimmy and the gals (PLZ)

5 - BigB Grian and Martyn

I need the 3rd life og alliance to be real

6 - Cleo and Jimmy by themselves or with others

Idk I just want to see Jimmy collab with more people, especially since I love cleo to BITSS

7 - BigB and literally anyone please I love him

8 - Perchnace the guess the build group.. ik groups that large don't usually form but hear me out...

9 - Ren and Grian

Plz!!

10 - Ranchers

11 - Jimmy and Bdubs

12 - LITERALLY ANYONE WHO HASBT TEAMED UP YET I LOVE THEM ALL I NEED THEM TO FROLICK INNTHE FIELDS WOTH EVERYONE

[hibischush]

do you have any headcanons of the older love interests (hayden and valen specifically, ik caldarus hasn't given us much to work off of yet LOL) about them feeling butterflies around the farmer for the first time? 🥺 ty for all your hc posts, they make me even more excited for early access!!

Ohhhh yes, yes I will. And I love doing this stuff! Writing hcs make me excited for the game, but sharing with the community has also been really really fun 🌺💗

Caldarus would literally just be, a rock. But a rock with emotions.

Hayden

You had gotten very close with Hayden

You two were the farming buddies! The ranch buddies!

Basically you two were often at one another's property helping each other out

And Hayden loved to help you out

He couldn't tell yet, but there was certainly a draw to you that always kept his interest piqued

One day when Hayden was working on his garden, you were sat down for a break on his front porch

As he thrusted down a spade into a stubborn dead root in the dirt, he heard you quietly gasp and try to yell as quietly as you could, "Hayden! Hayden look!"

Wiping sweat off his brow, he turned and saw his lovely prized chicken, Henrietta, willingly sitting on your lap and seemingly very pleased with herself

When he glanced at you, oh man

Hayden literally got goosebumps

Not only were you super excited to have gained Henrietta's trust, but the look of gentleness and love that you gave her as you cautiously brushed her feathers really did something for the rancher

With a flip in his stomach, he realized that he really wanted you to look at him that way

Valen

Like I mentioned before in her kissing hc post, it takes awhile for her to come to an understanding that she likes you more than a friend

You two were close friends long before that, often discussing books series with wine together

It wasn't until one day that Valen had come down with a bad fever

It was bad enough that she had to close the clinic for at least the day while she sorted through her syrup cabinet

You barged right through the clinic doors, out of breath and carrying a basket

Valen, confused but still pleased to see you, asks what you were doing here

"Juniper told me that the clinic was closed. I remember you telling me you only do that if you are sick, so I came here as fast as I could!"

Valen gives you a weak smile, telling you that she can take care of herself just fine as she finds the correct syrup and downs it

While the syrups definitely help with one's ailments, it won't be until the next day that you'll feel completely cured

You scoff, "Valen, let me take care of you for once. I brought goods, anyways. Get to your bed and I'll take you your hot vegetable soup, okay?"

The moment she heard you say that you'll take care of her is when her stomach started to do backflips

She did what she was told, but for a few days after that, she assumed it was her sickness

However, she couldn't deny that you made her feel the same way whenever you were close to her

[tiredfoxtf]

top five favourite hermit aus? Either yours or someone elses

I HAVE to do mine, because I am not really overly familiar to other's. BUT!!! I ///have to/// mention the Hels To Pay AU by @/aquaquadrant and @/lunarcrown!!! It's so good, please. (((also not really hc aus, because I am more of a life series guy, I am not a fake ik ik)))

The Wicked Wild Hunt AU It's a new one, of course it's on the top of the list. sdfsdf Also it is on the top because I am making this au with my good mate @/thedeerus! There aren't A Lot of content that is seen for it... for now... *ominous organ* The name is actually composed out of three roles I gave to Pearl, Joel and Gem (The Wicked, The Wild and The Hunt) in the life series and they reminded my good friend about The Wild Hunt myths! And it initiated shared brain wormies and since then we've been slowly chiseling at it. >:)

Those Blue Skies Above AU I know, I know, but I can't let go of it just yet, I am currently rethinking a lot of aspects that should tie together better for it to actually function as a story and not just everything I like thrown together. sfsdf I really enjoy the lore I am slowly building for it! And it has probably some of the coolest ideas of mine thematically and concept-wise. I just need to polish it better, and work out all the Actual Story Parts That Are Beyond Vibes, and I will be so damn ready to draw more of it!1!! But the au is kinda fantasy during industrialisation and heavy inspired by Studio Ghibli! I guess specifically Howl's Moving Castle! And is centric to Grian, Mumbo and Scar. Although because I am obsessed like that I can't avoid making so many others very significant to the story. Like. Smalletho, Ranchers, PET, Cleo, Gem, hecking Martyn even. And I will probably complicate things even more! :D

Tested On Humans AU This is PURE self-indulgence. I can't begin to explain the reason why but from the very childhood I was soooo fascinated and in love with the concept of human experimentation for some reason??? I would often play pretend by myself (I had no friends, obviously) where I would lay down and imagine The Scientists TM picking me apart and other medical stuff my 10 year old brain couldn't understand. And yeah, the fascination didn't go anywhere so I get to torture blorbos with it! I don't want to have huuuge plans for it, because it's not the point. The point is to draw and imagine them having a mental breakdown from medical stuff and looking in the mirror. But it kinda just works itself out. Like I had the idea that the reason why Cleo was interested in specifically researching Scar's regeneration is because she knows she's terminally ill and is actively looks for a way to at least to prolong her life a few years. Or that Alpha and Beta subjects are divided on the principle of treatment. Aaaand I am rambling.

The Road To Hell Is Paved With Good Intentions AU At this stage it's actually several aus that are sewn together, because they were too similar for my liking in nature, so I just took everything I liked the most from them and thrown them in the pot! And since you can't really tell from the name it's, yeah well, it's a superhero-ish au. Ik Ik everyone and their MOTHER made a superhero-adjacent au (especially because of ddvau, bless Maruu's heart) but I can't abstain when the thoughts!!! The au (at least in it's initial form) was originally made from a dream I had! Many peeps aren't really familiar with that, but I rarely have Normal dreams, it's either like anxiety/nightmare adjacent dreams or the most convoluted stuff with plot. In that dream, the french cartoon that shan't be named style, was a power system that basically meant that in the ring Grian (yeah straight up him) was some magical power that made him a superhero. But although he tries to be a hero, to do the right thing, he is more of the villain to everyone. This is how au got the name too!! Although not a lot of original points stayed, the name did.

Prying Eye of The Conversationalist AU Idkkkk how much of a fan of the au I am at the moment, it has a lot of stuff I REALLY like, but at the same time I am not sure how to made more coherent and horror-like, since it's. The Point. Heavily inspired by me being absolutely in love with Hermit Archives fic series by the way, which were inspired by The Magnus Archives, which I myself dropped at the beginning of season 4, because I didn't really had fun anymore. But my obsessed with classifications brain fell in love with the idea. Just to not use it in my au! sdfsdf The motifs are kinda there ig, if you squint, but it's like vague (as it can be after you familiarize yerself with TMA lol) and unimportant. Also kinda inspired by my old idea (not an au, original story that was also never meant to be) of Nothing Happened On June 15th where a group of people enter a small town on a roadtrip, which is anomaly in time and upon fixing it everyone who died get resurrected with no memory of it ever happening and as it should, because the more people know about it, the more likely it is to return and swallow everything.

Honourable mention: The Ancient Ruins AU, to which I am writing a fic, that is like an introduction and I am 7k words deep and I am so close to finishing it, I can see the finish line, but it's been literal months that I am writing it. 😭😭😭😭

[cowboys-of-tombstone]

Fixing a Broken Fence (Curly Bill x Rancher!Reader) 3/4

°˖✧Ko-Fi 💖 Patreon✧˖° < Previous ☆ Next > ??? (Ch. 4 will be available on Patreon early!)

     All the way back to camp, Curly Bill felt the wind brush against his face. He felt lighter, serene, even. He chuckled at the thought of himself using the kinds of words Johnny would, but he couldn’t help but have a sense of clarity from how he felt. He wasn’t just happy, but he wouldn’t describe himself as overwhelmed with joy, rather, he felt at peace with himself. 

     That peace stayed with him even as he tied his horse up and headed back to his tent for the night. 

     His cot groaned stiffly as Bill laid upon it. His hands cupped the back of his head, gazing up at the tent’s ceiling. All that passed through his ears was the whistling of the trees and the occasional cough from Ike in the distance. Bill laid there for what felt like hours, just reliving the day he had with you. He didn’t even know when he closed his eyes and fell asleep.

     Thunderous galloping ripped Bill from his slumber. It was light out, but the day had not broken the horizon just yet. 

     Bill hopped out of his tent, yanking his legs through his jeans, to see what the commotion was. At the center of camp, a great red cloud billowed in, engulfing the small group of Cowboys that had gathered around it.

     As the dust settled, familiar forms emerged from the haze, dusting themselves off with wide smiles.

     “Billy!” Ike cawed, recognizing his brother’s gait.

     “Johnny?!” Bill perked up, rushing over to meet the rest of the crowd.

     Indeed, Johnny Ringo and his posse marched out of the haze, with his arms spread out, as if to embrace every member of the gang. Through his thick mustache, Johnny’s grin shined like ivory. Curly Bill and the surrounding Cowboys looked on, confused by Johnny’s unusually jovial demeanor. 

     “Gentlemen,” Johnny paused, “we found our way back into Mexico!” 

     The whole camp exploded into cheers and gunshots, Bill galloped to Johnny and embraced him with a tight bear hug. Barnes and Billy lifted Ike upon their shoulders and spun him around; the old Clanton howled, holding his crutches above his head like a king, his staff. 

     “How’d ya do it, Juanito? How did you get back in?” Curly Bill asked, firmly gripping Johnny’s shoulders.

     Johnny chortled with a deep breath, “It wasn’t easy, that’s for sure. Let me get something to drink first.”

     “You heard this man!” Bill roared with laughter, “Crack the kegs, pop the champagne, pull out the good stuff you was savin’! These boys are thirsty!”

     Soon, the whole camp had gathered around to hear Johnny’s tale. The very air began to stink of alcohol, as no bottle was spared from being opened. However, Curly Bill realized, a bit too late, that they should’ve had breakfast first. In hardly any time at all, the dehydrated, starving Johnny Ringo began to slur his words and slosh around his half-full bottle of whiskey.

     “...Next thing we know, a group of twenty, no, fifty Mexican soldiers sprang from the hilltops. I’ve never seen a sight like it, not since Mason County. Anyway, they came running down like a stampede. There’s no way that the half-dozen or so of us would’ve been able to make it past them without bein’ ripped to shreds. Thanks to Sherm, he spotted a bottle-neck with sharp corners that we hid behind. Those soldiers rode passed and never thought twice. From there we followed the trail back and here we are, in one piece!”

     Bill swished some cheap hooch around his tongue to burn off his cottonmouth. He spat it out and clicked his tongue, “And so you reckon that’s how we sneak in and out?”

     “The way they got that border wrapped up, it might be the only way. For now, at least.”   

     “Well, what’re we waiting for? I’ll bet just about every feller in camp is itchin’ for some action!” Bill jumped up from his seat, “How about we head out in a couple hours so that you and your lot get some quick shut eye?” 

     His second in command nodded, “Yeah, we saw a few close ranches. They’re not far from the trail.”

     “It’s settled then!” Bill commanded, shattering his bottle into the smoldering fire pit, “Everybody, get ready to head out by noon. Grab a bite, some shut eye, or hit the can, cause we’re leaving on the dot! Let’s go make some moolah!”

     The camp ignited a roaring fire to heat up a massive cauldron of stew. While Johnny and his scouting party fell into an unwakeable slumber, the remaining Cowboys oiled their weapons, filled their canteens, and fed their horses.

     Soon, their shadows disappeared as high noon approached. Though the heat dug into their shoulders, their eyes were gleaming with a hunger that food wouldn’t suffice. Like wolves, they gathered together again to split their pack into war parties, each one led by one of Johnny’s scouts. Even Bill took a step back so that Ringo himself could take the lead. 

     The red-sashed locusts rode out and followed the trail to the border. They passed the great river, and once they got on the Spanish soil, they went their separate ways, all with the prospect of riches on their mind. 

     They were on Bill’s mind too, of course. However, there was something else on his mind as well. While the other Cowboys dreamed of wasting their nights on gambling, booze, and other unscrupulous activities, Curly Bill had the sudden realization about how little he knew about you. What kind of gifts did you like? Were you the kind of girl who would like flowers? Or were you more into books and the like? What would you think would be a good night out? So many questions that he didn’t even realize he had until now, when you were far away from him.

     Bullets whistled out of their barrels. Skittish cattle bellowed in blind panic, following any horseman to guide them. Fire ascended from the burning pueblo in pillars of thick, woolish ash, and pained Spanish begged for retribution.

     All music to Curly Bill’s ears. And what’s more, was there was no sign of the Mexican military to slow them down. Only a thread of smoke was left in the star studded sky by the time Bill, Johnny, and the rest made it back on the other side of the border. When the other war parties joined back together with them, they all had several dozens of cattle between them all. 

     There were still several miles to go before they could find themselves back within Cochise County. With no sense of danger from their surroundings, just a flat plain with sparse tufts of bush and a shallow creek for the cattle, The Cowboys felt they were in the clear and set up camp for the night. 

     Because of how many men there were, a number of separate campfires were started, each with several Cowboys huddled around them. The smoke trails curiously spiraled into the heavens in a loose, yarn-like thread. Eventually, this twine disappeared amongst the stars who seemed to lightly tug at the smoke like fish nipping at a baited line.

     Curly Bill and his closest comrades exhaustedly chewed salty jerky and sipped pungent, bitter coffee. Though they had won the day, none felt like the victor with mixed nuts and dried fruit. 

     Barnes, who chewed his jerky with the same thoroughness as a cow with its cud, longed for a plate of real food.

     “Say, fellas, whatcha fixin’ to do when you get paid tomorrow? I am hankerin’ for some steak and eggs and a real frothy beer.” Barnes imagined as he tried to get his mind off the bland paste that accumulated in his cheek.

     Stilwell picked his teeth with his hunting knife, “I’ve been savin’ up to get my guns engraved. Maybe I’ll get them polished too, while I’m at it.”

     “Thinkin’ on buying a bath for Ike,” Billy Clanton thought as he spat into the dirt, “I think soaking his foot in the hot water will do him some good.”

     McMasters lightly ruffled his hair, “I think I found the one-”

     The whole campfire groaned. 

     “I’m serious this time! She’s the redhead from the Birdcage Theatre. She told me I was her favorite customer.”

     Indian Charlie perked up, “¡Ándale! She told me the same thing, Sherm!”

     The group’s eyes practically popped from their skulls as a mixture of gasps and howls erupted from them. Poor McMasters wilted like a desert flower.

     “What about you, Bill?” Johnny asked, after a drink of his coffee, “Got any plans yourself?”

     “Well, now that y’all mention it, I got a girl I got my eye on too.” Bill shrugged as he dragged from a smoke.

     “That’s right!” Stilwell snapped his fingers, “Is it true you’ve gone smitten on the girl that turned Ike’s toes to a batch of plums?”

     “Who’s goin’ around spreadin’ rumors like that?” Bill sneered with smoke flowing from his nostrils.

     “Uh, Ike did.”

     “Oh.” Bill clicked his tongue, “Reckon he’s still a little sore about it. But it’s true.”

     Johnny let out a short laugh, having just found out about your supposedly tumultuous affair with Bill.

     Barnes guffawed, “No way! She’s crazy!”

     “No she ain’t!” Curly Bill waved off Barnes. 

     Billy Clanton thought deeply as he rubbed his jaw, “What makes her so special, boss?”

     Curly Bill sighed deeply, “I get it, but the way I see it is that nobody died. And all Ike has to do is nurse off that foot. Hell, I’ll pay for a couple of baths myself too. But, truthfully, I don’t know why that girl is so special. Something about her eyes and the way she looked at me when we first met. I haven’t gotten the chance to get to know her at all, but I’m gonna once I get paid.”

     The group was silent for a moment. Yet, whistles and sounds of swooning swelled from them all into an overwhelming wave of laughter and kissing sounds.

     “Oh, shut the hell up! All of you!”

------------------

     A little bit more than a week went by since you last saw Curly Bill. The thought occurred to you as you swept your porch, one particular afternoon. You leaned against your broom and wiped away the sweat from your brow. Looking out to the far distance, you hoped, at any moment, you would see that familiar silhouette ride over the hills and down to your side.

     However, a whispering gust of wind brought you back to your senses. Afterall, why should you expect a fella like him to come back and commit to one girl? Not that you were hoping that he came back, but he was great company to have after being by yourself for so long. Bill was a handful, without a doubt, but it sure beat the next few days since he left, you admitted to yourself. 

     Having listened to your own ramblings enough, you finished your sweeping and headed inside. Your chores were finished for the moment, and you weren’t hankering for anything in particular. Really, you were just simply bored. Even your dog found entertainment chasing the calves amongst the herd, while you, on the other hand, plopped onto one of your handmade armchairs in order to ride out the wave of dullery. 

     Just before you planned to doze off, a rushing beat became louder and louder from outside. The noise came to a rasping halt as you scrambled out of your chair. But before you could reach for a window to see what the commotion was, there was a knock at your door. 

     “Who is it?” You asked.

     “It’s the sheriff! You’re under arrest for stealing my heart and resisting my charm!” An all too familiar gruff voice called from the other side.

     A smile was forced upon your lips, much to your chagrin, as you opened the door. 

     Curly Bill flicked his tongue, “Hey! Don’t open the door unless I got a warrant!” 

     “I’ll remember that next time you say some tomfoolery like that.” You tsked with one hand on your hip, “What brings you around, stranger?”

     “Oh, don’t be like that. Fella’s gotta find some way to make ends meet!” Bill reasoned while thumbing his nose.

     “Oh? And how’s that? What does a fine businessman, like yourself, do to earn his way?”

     “Well, just like you said, I’m a businessman. And I help the Clantons sell any cows they get their hands on. And they pay me handsomely so that I can bring a gift like this to you!”

     Out of his pocket, rested a little box that he gently placed in your hand. You opened it and a glint of light shined in your eyes. They were little earrings that could rest just on your earlobes alone. A stone of turquoise sat upon a simple gold base that was polished until reflective.

     “Oh my God, they’re beautiful! Hold on, let me see them in the mirror.” You gasped as you clenched them to your chest. 

     That devil smugly dusted his knuckles and tossed you an equally complacent glance. 

     Your smile puckered into a scowl with rosy cheeks, “Well, what’re you standin’ there with that look on your face for? Get in here!” 

     Curly Bill closed the door behind himself as you hurried to the decorative mirror that hung in your living room. The slight tremors from your excited fingers made it a bit difficult to get them on. However, once you got them into place and stepped back to look at yourself, your hand covered the smile that graced your lips.

     “These had to have cost you a fortune.” You muttered, turning your head from side to side.

     Curly Bill shook his head, “Nah, it was nothing. I originally wanted to get you some thick gold bars to dangle from your ears. But then, I saw those and thought that you could wear them anytime you liked, even when you’re busy working!” 

     You laid your hand on your collarbone, with a tightened throat.

     “That’s mighty kind of you,” You said softly, “for thinking about me in that way.” 

     Curly Bill sauntered slowly over to you and brushed a strand of hair away from your face, “I can’t help it when you’re all I think about.”

     You reached out and felt his abrasive fingertips, your eyes entranced with his, and your words caught in your throat.

     “I…” You managed to say, “I’ve been thinking about you too.”

     “Is that so? Missed me that much, huh?” Bill’s toothy grin returned.

     Glancing to the side, you admitted, “I would’ve appreciated some company, yeah.”

     Bill leaned in, “Well, let me give you all the company you need.”

     The Cowboy drew closer to you, his eyes sparkling with desire. He had wrapped his arm around your waist and pulled you gently towards him. You felt his warm breath on your face and his lips hovering over yours. No doubt he wanted to kiss you, and part of you wanted to kiss him back. But you also knew that he was a dangerous man, one who could easily break your heart. Even then, you still hardly knew him, by any metric.

     You swiveled your head to the side and gave him a light peck on the cheek. Smiling sweetly, you looked into his eyes.

     “Easy there, Beau,” you said softly. “We’re not there yet. But, I meant it when I said I missed you.”

     You saw a flash of disappointment in Bill’s eyes, but he quickly masked it with a charming grin. 

     He kissed your cheek in return and whispered in your ear, “Sorry there, Darlin’. Didn’t mean to rush you. You were just so irresistible, I couldn’t help myself.”

     You hugged him tightly, taking in the coarseness of his shirt. When you let him go, you pointed him to a chair, “Why don’t you make yourself comfortable, while I get us something to drink. You look famished.”

     Lumbering over to the wooden seat, Bill plopped down with a thud. He leaned back, balancing himself on the chair’s two rear legs.

     “S’pose I am a bit parched. Whatcha got?” He inhaled sharply.

     The cupboards had everything, from jam, to oils, and pickled produce; and all were lightly covered in dust, waiting for a rainy day. There, waiting in the back, was a stoneware bottle. A relief of an apple and two stalks of wheat decorated its surface, and two handles to carry it with.

     “I don’t have anything too harsh, but would you like a drink of apple cider?” You asked, reaching for the heavy jug.

     “Dessert before dinner, huh? Y’know, I haven’t had cider since I was an ankle biter. Yeah, I’ll take a cup.” Bill licked his lips.

     Into two cups you poured the bubbling golden liquid. It had been a while since you had enjoyed cider yourself, and took an early swig. It was tart and the bitterness of the drink burned your tongue with a sanitizing hiss.

     A wheezing cough escaped your lungs, “Ahem! It’s a bit strong for my tastes. I think a scoop of sugar and cinnamon will do it some good, would you like some for yours?” 

     Bill shook his head, “I don’t know, I think I might want to try it as it is!”

     Your lips tighten and you squinted with repulsion, “Ugh, are you sure? It’s pretty bitter.”

     “Yeah! I like when my drinks put hair on my chest.” Bill said proudly. 

     With a defeated shrug, you quickly mixed your drinks and brought them over to your living room. Bill raised his cup to you with a nod and took a foamy sip. He smacked his lips, took another sip, peered one eye into his cup and muttered, “Did you give me your drink by accident?”

     “Of course not!” You answered boisterously, and then you paused. You were sure you passed him the right cup, and yet now you had to double check. So you pressed your lips to the mouth of the cup and drank.

     It was a warm, sweet experience, reminiscent of a bowl of fresh apple pie. The heat ran down your throat, soothing it all the way down. 

     “Wait a minute, what’re you talking about? Are you telling me that’s too sweet for you?” You asked with disbelief, pointing to his cup.

     Bill shrugged, “I was talking about how tame it was. Hopin’ it would burn on the way down, with the way you reacted. But…”

     “You’re crazy! You could wash rust off with that!”

     Bill laughed, reveling in your amazement. It was charming, seeing someone who didn’t live the kind of life where feats of bravado were tested regularly, and to see the astoundment of something trivial to him, not be so with you.

     “Thanks for the drink, though.” Bill continued. “It’s, uh, a breath of fresh air!”

     You giggled, “You’re too kind. Maybe I’ll save up for some good whiskey next time I’m in town.”

     “No worries, you don’t have to, on my account. I’m already getting used to this.” Bill insisted, quickly swallowing another watery drink.

     You shook your head while you too indulged in your sugary beverage. Though, as you settled into your thoughts, one emerged from the back of your mind.

     “So,” You asked, rubbing a circle into the coarse hair of your armchair, “how did your job go?”

     The sun-tanned Cowboy rubbed his chin with caution, “It went… about as well as it could have. Why do ya ask?”

     Your finger tapped your lip, “Well, I guess I ask, because I was wondering what would bring you to keep coming back to that kind of work?”

     Bill sighed, “Don’t judge me too harshly, Miss. It’s just what I do. A fella like me ought to use what he’s good at and get paid well for it. Don’t ya think?”

     “But don’t you ever get scared? Like you might not make it out in one piece?”

     “Once in a while, sure.” He nodded, “But it’s what I’m made for and I have some fun while at it too!”

     Distant barking gave you pause. However, it quickly turned back to playful growling and mooing, allowing for your attention to turn back to Bill.

     You tilted your head to the side, “How can you have fun doing something like that?”

     Bill shifted his eyes to the side under a heavy squint. His teeth lightly bit his bottom lip, “Huh, I don’t think I ever really thought about it. But since you asked, I reckon it’s because fellas like me are used to it.”

     “But, how? How could anybody get used to it?”

     Bill began to stare off, remembering a time before The Cowboys. He smirked kindly, “I guess your folks did you well, then.”

     You furrowed your brow with deep contemplation. Just what was going on in his mind?

     Suddenly, he shook his head, releasing himself from his thoughts, “I gotta ask, did your old man tell you about the Civil War?”

     “Huh,” You thought, “I don’t think he ever did, now that you mention it. How’d you know he served?”

     “Just a lucky guess, I suppose.” He shrugged jovially. “You’re a fine lady with a good head on your shoulders, old enough to run this farm on your own. I reckoned then, that your old man would’ve seen it. Anyway, I can see he’s a good man for not telling you.”

     “Why’s that?” You asked, garnering more questions than answers.

     “The things we saw in those fields, in those hills, what happened to the good men that were lost in the mud, all fighting for something they believed in, will change a man in a way you mix two colors of paint. Once they’re mixed, they can never be unmixed. Some men can be the color your old man was, tainted, but otherwise able to return to their old lives. Some of us turn out a bit too different from where we began, and so we accept our lot and keep doing what we’re good at.”

     “Is that why you took the night we met so lightly?” You asked with more concern than you wished to let on.

     Bill rolled his eyes, half expecting the conversation to lead to that. “The way I see it is this: No one died, and the worse thing to happen to anybody, is my friend havin’ to be drunk for a couple of weeks cause his foot hurts. But I’m paying for his doctor bill and his brother’s paying for his ‘medication,’ so there ain’t no harm done.”

     Your teeth sunk into your bottom lip. Sure, it made sense why Bill and his like are the way they are, but how could he not see how he affected others? How he affected you?

     “Sure,” you coughed hoarsely, “I get it.” You struggled to swallow your apprehension along with your cider. Although it felt like a stone was forced down your throat, you were able to get it down. With your painted on smile, it seemed Bill was also put at ease.

     The Cowboy spun his cider within his cup, letting out a short chuckle, “Hey, uh thanks for not judging too harshly. I know that ain’t easy.”

     A hesitant nod rattled from your head. The carefree attitude he held with himself was both admirable and daunting. As much as you attempted to accept his explanation, there remained a prodding in the back of your mind. Hopefully, you thought, it would subside in due time.

     The many adornments of your home were a constant catch to the Cowboy’s eye, more so that day, than his previous visits. The walls were adorned with taxidermy and various framed watercolor paintings.

     The heads of deer and pronghorn did not sit as trophies, a few were hardly impressive in that way. Yet, their necks curved in ways as if they were frozen in time, in a single moment, rather than stuffed.

     Nothing helped bring about that moment more than the watercolor paintings. Each one laced with black ink and vivid colors revealing landscapes that Bill could recall seeing himself, but never with quite the same beauty.

     “Nice decorations.” Bill managed to utter, “I can almost tell which of your folks chose what around here.”

     “Actually,” You laughed shortly, “they made ‘em! But you are right about one thing, they definitely had their own tastes.”

     Bill’s eyes widened, “Oh, they made these?”

     You leaned back and crossed your arms pridefully, “Yep! Just about did everything with their own two hands.”

     “So I’m guessing these are all of your old man’s trophies?” 

     “I guess in a way they are.” You thought aloud, “He once told me, during the war, he saw this beautiful horse riding into battle. It was a life changing moment, but later he found it killed. It broke his heart seeing that creature like that, and would’ve rather have had it live on in some sort of way. So he took up taxidermy as a hobby just in case he wanted to preserve such a moment again.”

     “After shootin’ the deer himself?” Curly Bill asked with a brow raised.

     You shrugged playfully, “It’s free meat and leather. All it takes is one good bullet and some free time.”

     “I guess a fella’s gotta feed his family somehow. What about your mom? What kind of scars was she carrying?”

     You waved away the thought, “No, no, no. Nothing like that at all. She just loved to paint, always had since she was knee high. These were some of the last ones she painted before she got sick. Her best ones, in my opinion.” 

     Bill carefully stared into the paintings. The pen strokes implied a shaky hand, carefully attempting to outline vegetation and mountain faces with strict intent. However the wobbling lines allowed for nature to be implied, such as the gnarled surface of tree bark or broken stone. This was juxtaposed by the soft watercolor that messily flowed in and out of the outlines. Many times, the colors were blended together and yet, never felt muddied or accidental. Truly, they were one of a kind, and not meant to be replicated like printing pressed pictures.

     Bill hummed, “Ever thought about paintin’ like your Ma?”

     “Sure did!” You chirped, “Got real into it a few years back, I thought I got pretty good at it too.”

     Coyote’s playfully yowled in the distance with a pair of rock doves seemingly joining in with soft cooing.

     Your smile shrank to one side, “But, uh… that’s when my Pa started needing more help around the farm. I thought I could get back to it eventually, but I suppose I never did. It doesn’t feel like I got any time, I guess.”

     Curly Bill scratched his scalp, “Well, why don’t you make time? That’s what I always do when I wanna do something.”

     “That sounds mighty nice,” You noted sarcastically, “but in case you’ve forgotten, I got a whole farm I need to run! I can’t just leave and go do whatever I want, there’s always something to be done around here. If it ain’t broken, I gotta feed it, or clean up after it. And by the end of the day, I’m exhausted and want to relax. Not to mention, I got handsome thieves comin’ around trying to steal what’s mine!”

     Your compliment burned him like chewing on cinnamon, endearingly warm to the palette, but searing to the tongue. However, it got him thinking.

     “Hmm, well, what if this handsome thief, you speak of, had brought some help so that you could take a day off?” Curly Bill asked smugly while rubbing his chin. 

     “We’ll see about that.” You shrugged with a coy grin. But as you looked over at the Cowboy, you too began to ponder him and his story. “What about you, Bill? What were your folks like?” You asked as you leaned your head onto your palm.

     Bill quickly chugged the last of his cider, and with a sharp sigh, he muttered, “You don’t wanna know.”

     The stilted response had almost knocked over you and your chair. No witty response, no quip, it was very unlike what you’ve come to know of him. Of course, it was his own way of politely asking for privacy. However, for such an open book as Bill, to suddenly close himself off as quickly as he did, it caused your curiosity to ring like a church bell.

     “Well that hardly seems fair,” You commented softly, sliding the pitcher of cider closer to him, “you know pretty much everything about me and my folks now, and I’d like to know more about you.”

     Crickets cautiously tuned their instruments with the sun’s steady departure. Bill stared at the pitcher with contempt. It was rare for the Cowboy to find himself left open to vulnerability, what was worse was that it was on a subject he held closer to him than any other secret. 

     He sucked air between his teeth and snatched the pitcher off the table. In one last moment of regret, you quickly raised your hand, “I-I’m sorry, Bill. I was just teasing, you don’t have to tell me anything too personal, until you’re-”

     “No, it’s alright.” Bill began while pouring more cider, “It’s just that, I don’t think I ever talked to anybody about this.” He stared into his bubbling drink, almost transfixed by the disappearing froth. “I reckon it’s ‘cause I never wanted to think about it.”

     “What do you mean?” You leaned in closer.

     Curly Bill wiped his nose with contemplation, “Well, uh, where do I even start? I mean, I don’t recall ever having a mother; and my Pa, well, he liked me ‘bout as much as I liked him. And I didn’t.”

     The Cowboy gulped down the cider like a fish did water and poured himself another glass full.

     He continued, “Ol’ Man Clanton was always tough on his boys, but I think it’s ‘cause the geezer didn’t know better. Kind of making due with what he had, you know? 

     “But my Pa? He was sharper than an arrowhead, and could shoot through you twice as fast. He knew exactly what he was doing, and he took every chance he could to make me feel like I couldn’t measure up to be his son.”

     You shook your head, “Ugh, how terrible! What did he do? Did he hit you?”

     Bill shot you a crooked glance, then chuckled, “Well, yeah he did. But I usually deserved it. No, what he did felt worse than a sore keister.” 

     Before the Cowboy could explain himself, you quickly reached for the pitcher of cider. The warm, sugary drink felt like a protective campfire from the sudden chill of Bill’s tale.

     When you lifted the pitcher, however, there was hardly enough to fill your cup halfway. Maybe the cider was weak for his palette after all?

     “You know what?” Bill noted as he smacked his tongue, “I’m so used to all that coffin varnish they call whiskey back in town. But I reckon this grew on me. Maybe I’ll get a cask for myself.”

     A small smile perked the corners of your lips. You had almost forgotten what he was trying to distract himself from. 

     “But back to what I was sayin’,” The red devil sighed, “yeah, my ol’ man beat me. But it was for the usual things, breaking something or stealin’ one of his smokes. That’s fine, but there was never a ‘job well done,’ or a ‘I’m proud of you.’

     “There was this one time, where I stayed up all night takin’ care of his prized heifer for the county fair. I groomed it, I brushed it, I went and shaved down her hooves, I damned near got in there and brushed her teeth for her! All because I wanted our cow to get the blue ribbon. And we did. Now granted, that heifer was from award winning stock, already, but I knew I played my part. 

     “But when it was all over, and I told him what I had done, not a single pat on the back, a handshake, not even a nod. All he said to me was, ‘Well son, that’s what you’re supposed to do.’ And that was my entire life with that man. Never a moment of pride nor gratitude for me. He was always above all of it.”

     The wind whistled from underneath your door as the room fell into silence. Rasping from Bill’s thick calluses against your mug hissed like a feather in your ear. He looked down, but it was as if he was looking at his reflection in an imaginary pond. He exhaled lightly and his contemplative expression seemed somber, gloomy even.

     Then his brow furrowed, and his mouth contorted and twisted into a snarled smile. Guffaws erupted from his belly. He threw back his head and placed his palm over his eyes.

     “After I came back from serving in the war, that gray jackass stayed exactly the same. So, I left!” The Cowboy flicked his tongue with the grin of a diamondback. “And I took what I deserved. Done rustled about a third of that bastard’s five thousand cows with me!”

     Your jaw fell to the floor, “You didn’t!”

     “Single handedly.”

     “But weren’t you worried they were gonna catch you? I mean, you’re just one man with this huge herd of cattle. How did you even get away with it?”

     “Believe me, after riding with that lot for a full day, I started to wonder the same thing. But somehow I did, and I made it to some reservation. San Carlos, I think it was. But the best part was selling the whole herd to them Indians there for a new horse and a couple of dollars. Never knew what happened to ‘em all, guess I never really cared enough to find out.”

     By that point, the coyote garbed in red had released himself from his mental chains, and sat back in his chair with a pompous grin. And all you could think, by that point, was how much of a… free-spirit he was! However, you thought to yourself, perhaps if you had an upbringing like Bill, you’d eat the devil with the horns on, too. 

     Pouring the remains of the pitcher into your cup, you raised your drink to him with a chuckle, “I suppose that’s a toast to a fresh start, huh?”

     Bill leaned over and gently clinked his mug with yours, “Amen to that! And cheers for hearing me out. I’m starting to feel like I can tell you anything!”

     “Oh,” You softly remarked with your hand on your chest, “I’m sure it wasn’t easy for you.”

     Bill nodded contently, but the conversation began to lull. He appeared to enjoy the quiet. You, on the other hand, reached over to the pitcher again. The toast had gone down softly and emptied your cup, leaving it thirsty for more. However, the pitcher was hollow and left you feeling peckish for another drink.

     “Hm,” You hummed, while rhythmically tapping your fingers together. 

     “What is it?” Bill sniffed loudly.

     You inhaled sharply, “I’m feeling pretty good right now. But, I’m thinkin’ maybe I could go for a couple more drinks.”

     Bill clapped his hands thunderously, then rubbed them together with a little too much enthusiasm, “Now we’re talkin’! Where do ya keep the good stuff?”

     Your eyes floated to the loft upstairs that had now been blanketed in a gentle darkness.

     “Give me one second, I’ll be right back.” You noted out the side of your mouth. 

     With a lit candle, you made your way up the rickety, groaning stairs. Animals frozen in time watched you unjudgingly as you carefully tiptoed to the loft’s entrance. 

     Long roughly cut rafts ran across the ceiling at angles that made the room seem almost triangular in shape. Hanging from the ceiling-walls were a Great Blue Heron and a green headed Mallard. Their wings were spread in orbit around a saber and a wide brimmed calvary hat. The gold of both relics of the past faintly glowed from your candle’s reflection.  

     The far end of the loft was hardly visible, but was home to a sturdy dresser and a stuffed beaver that sat upon it. But midway through, sat two beds. Each was composed of a heavy wooden frame and adorned with thick quilts of flowery design. Both had their own chests that sat at the feet of the beds, but you were interested in the one further from the entrance. 

     You kneeled down to the chest and set the candle to the side. Upon opening the heavy lid, it released its breath into your face with the stinking fumes of old varnish. But inside was a messy pile of treasure and old letters to friends and family long forgotten. 

     As you rummaged through the bottom of the old, sour-smelling chest, you found what you were looking for. Two casks of whiskey were laying side-by-side, with one already opened and half drank.

     You sighed with a gentle smile, “Still workin’ on that one, Pa? How about I take that old bottle and you can keep the fresh one to yourself.”

     Softly and gingerly you raised the whiskey from the chest and closed the lid. A sigh of relief rushed out of your lips and blood flushed through your ears. Quickly, you picked up the candle, and hurried downstairs. 

     “Did ya say something to me up there?” Bill called as you trotted down the steps.

     “Sorry, I was talking to myself while looking for this!” You chirped, eagerly presenting the bottle with a playful jingle. 

     The Cowboy slapped his knee and snarled, “That’s what I’m talkin’ about! I need a sip of that!”

     “Hold your horses, I’m getting there!” You bit your lip, ripping the cork off the top with a satisfying, bloomp! 

     The fumes from the noxious liquid burned the insides of your nose. Your eyes also felt the sting of sterilization, even as you kept yourself away from it. Bill, on the other hand, breathed so deeply it was as if he were smelling a patch of roses.

     His fingers crawled towards his cup, and with a strangulating grip, he seized it and began to drink. Air was sucked in between his teeth and was released with a satisfied ‘ahh!’ 

     “You know,” Bill licked his lips, already pouring another cup, “That cider wasn’t too bad. But boy howdy! This is perfect, it’s like I’m drinking a cup of melted scrap iron!”

     Your nose scrunched, not with disgust, but with morbid curiosity. The bronze colored drink vaguely reflected your appalled expression as you peered into it. 

     And so you took a sip.

     Much to Bill’s description, the alcohol ripped into your tongue like a vengeful jalapeño, searing every surface of your mouth on the way down. You gulped much to your body’s dismay. Your ears began to ring and your face became flushed, as if you were holding your breath the entire time.

     “Thatta girl!” Curly Bill pounded the table. 

     You wheezed, while clearing your throat, “Thanks, for what that’s worth.”

     “Whatcha think, do ya like it?”

     The edges of your lips tightened, “Hmm, liked it, huh? I reckon I didn’t.” You grimaced, much to Bill’s delight as he let out a hoarse guffaw. 

     Your lip smacked with embarrassment, “I’m not trying to be a party pooper, dammit!”

     “Party pooper? Who said anything about that?” Bill tilted his head curiously. 

     “You know, ‘cause I can’t drink like you?...” You muttered realizing the extent of your panic. Bill simply smiled as he leaned his head upon his hand. His cheeks were softened and his gaze was not piercing.

     “You’re real cute, you know that?” He chuckled softly.

     A soft red glow emanated from your face and neck. Incoherent stammering sprang from your mouth with intent on saying something, but after a short ramble, you simply stopped and continued to collect red in your cheeks. The more you tried to hide your embarrassment, the more it showed. And the more it showed, the more Bill seemed to smile.

     “W-well, anyway; I can’t drink this as it is. I gotta go fix it up, I’ll be right back.” You uttered, spinning around and heading for the kitchen. You could’ve sworn you heard Bill chuckle under his breath.

     Back in the kitchen you began kicking yourself internally. You loathed how childish you felt in the moment. You were never one to feel shy around potential suitors, even the ones who were obnoxiously bold. So why was he, of all people, able to reduce you to a babbling mess? You felt like a mouse being played by a cat.

     Patting your cheeks, you blew out a puff of air, then continued on with what you were looking for.

     ‘Maybe,’ You thought to yourself, ‘my nerves won’t be so shot once I get a little juiced.’ 

     With such a bitter drink, however, you knew that sugar wasn’t gonna cut it alone. Quickly glancing around, you wondered how you were going to keep yourself from getting heartburn from the noxious drink. Thankfully, a jar of peach jam caught your attention. 

     ‘Oh, thank the Lord.’ you sighed with relief.

     With a pop of the lid, you began shoveling the syrup covered peaches into your whiskey. After a quick spin of your spoon, you gave your concoction a taste test. Still bitter, but much better than before. You took your cup and the jar, knowing you’ll be needing more of it.

     “Well, Hell’s bells! Had to go sweeten up your drink, again, huh? What happened, was the sugar not enough for ya?” Curly Bill snickered as he shamelessly poured another cup.

     “Well not all of us can guzzle watered-down shoe polish! Some of us like to actually enjoy the things we put in ourselves.” You puffed, throwing yourself back into your armchair. 

     Bill nodded while still glancing around at the peculiar ornamentation of stuffed animals, “I’m glad we can drink this together then.”

     There he went again, you thought as you smirked with a hand covering your mouth. Curly Bill was like biting into a freshly made pie, scalding with his banterous words, and yet, almost on the turn of a dime, saying something so sweet. You waved him away, even though it seemed like he saw through you.

     The Cowboy reached around to scratch his own back while pondering aloud, “So, what do you do for fun around here, anyway? You’re still quite a ways away from anywhere reasonably enternainin’, right? I know my boy, Johnny’s getting cute with this one girl from town. She’s a bookworm and a half like him though. Is that what you do?”  

     “Yeah, I read on occasion. Wouldn’t call myself a bookworm though.” You shrugged, “Really, if I’m not reading, I either take a walk around my property, or I play fetch with my dog, Rocky, out there.” 

     The silence of the sudden end to your list surprised you. Curly Bill glancing at you from the edge of his eyes only served to woefully confirm what you were already thinking. 

     “I, uh… Huh.” You mumbled, “Sorry, I didn’t mean to sound so boring, heh.”

     “No! No, that sounds like a, er-” Bill squinted one eye in thought, “Like a time and a half right there!”

     “Oh, shut up.” You laughed out loud. However, when you finally started quieting down, you began to really think about it. 

     “It wasn’t always this way, you know.” You bit your lip. “When he, my father, was still around, I didn’t have to worry about everything so much. I could actually go into town and window shop without thinking of the time. We’d go camping every so often, or even go horseback riding when he wanted to have venison. All the way until he just couldn’t anymore. Then I couldn’t either.” 

     You realized how much you were missing out by keeping your parent’s legacy alive. It seemed you yearned for just a bit of adventure, but weren’t willing to pay the price for it.

     You poured the biting peach concoction passed your lips, perhaps more than you wanted, but gulped it all down nonetheless. What felt like steam escaped from your chest as a feeling of calm washed over you. Leaning one arm against the rest of your armchair, you admit to Bill, “I guess if you want to know what I reallywant to do, I just wanna let loose for once. Have a hot meal I didn’t need to make myself, or get me one of those fancier drinks. But, I’d really like to go see one of those theatrical shows at The Birdcage, at least once, just to see what it’s like!”

     Perhaps your own enthusiasm caught you off guard. You shrunk back in your chair, unsure what Bill would think of your idyllic adventure. Surely a cowboy, who has lived enough for several lifetimes for you, would find such a night to be trivial in what could only be considered ‘just another night’ for him.

     He rose from his seat and sauntered towards you with his hands in his pockets. When he reached your side of the room, he took your hand in his and pulled you from your chair. The sudden force of his strength was like that of a horse suddenly pulling you along at full gallop. You blinked, and when you opened your eyes, you were in his arms. The rough cotton of his shirt rubbed against your face abrasively, and yet it felt warm and comforting. He led you in a slow two step dance with gentle sways and spins. All the while saying softly in your ear, “What if we went together, just you and me? We can dance the night away, drink and eat ‘til your heart’s content.” 

     His muscular hands bent you backwards as if in the climax of an exotic dance. Using his thumb, he gently brushed away the few strands of hair that fell upon your face before caressing your cheek softly. 

     “And then, we could head somewhere nice and quiet, and…” Bill trailed off as he drew you closer, never breaking eye contact. He could smell the sweet marmalade in your breath as you two almost brought your lips together. 

     A building pressure expanded in your chest. Heat had gotten stuck behind your heart in your throat and was on the verge of setting you ablaze. You wanted to kiss him back, but flashes of the past, what he had almost done, still kept you from fulfilling your desire.

     You put a pair of fingers between the two of your lips keeping them from making contact. Bill pulled back with a furrowed brow, not entirely sure if he had taken your first kiss or not.

     “I’m sorry,” You sighed softly, “I’m just…”

     “Just not ready, huh?” Bill muttered with a half smile.

     A slight chuckle escaped your lips, “Would you be, if you were me?”

     “Well…” Bill trailed off again as he straightened the two of you back to your feet. Whether he was unwilling or unable to answer, you weren’t sure.

     The both of you took a moment to adjust yourselves to an awkward silence. Unwilling to live a moment further in the embarrassing miasma, Curly Bill approached you with his thumbs through his belt, sheepishly saying, “Sorry about the… uh, well you know.” 

     You smiled warmly, “Thanks for dropping by, it means more than you know.”

     The Cowboy nodded unsatisfactorily, but he held his head proudly as he made his way towards the door. 

     He jiggled the door handle and strolled out onto the dry dirt. The crumbling soil crunched underneath his heel as he dug into it. You, on the other hand, stayed just behind the door frame, watching him gather his thoughts.

     “So, can I,” Bill inhaled sharply, facing away from you, “Can I come see you again?”

     You rested your hand against the frame and chuckled, “Of course you can.”

     The charming thief’s shoulders straightened and suddenly, he spun around with a wide grin that was barely held together within his mustache. He took off his hat and held it to his chest, “Then, until next time, Miss.”

     Bill lowered himself into an exaggerated bow before making his leave. As that red devil became enshrouded by the night you gave him a quiet, gentle wave and closed the door. 

     You bit your lips together as you cleaned the cups and put away the alcohol. A smirk kept swelling up from within you as you thought back to the various moments of enjoyment throughout the night. Even as you looked at the quarter-full bottle of whiskey one more time before returning it to its chest, you thought about how close you two were in that moment. How much you wanted to kiss him back, and shuddered when you pushed him away. 

     “Ugh, real smooth, girl.” You tsked.

     Meanwhile, Bill had made his way up the lonely hill. He looked back and saw the last candlelight in your home disappear, so too did his smile. Rubbing the back of his neck, he untied his horse from the tree, taking one last longing glance at your cottage. 

     “Damn.” He hissed, “Did I mess up?”

[life-winners-liveblog]

fwhip has said specifically that he doesn't appreciate him or any of his characters doing bad stuff. I don't think this particular storyline about him is right. This may be just a story and just an au but I think it would be better to respect his boundaries. I think I speak for a lot of when I say it was fun back when it was just a collection of our favourite characters doing silly and occasionally angsty stuff. This is just not it- im sorry. Ik there are people that may find this kinda stuff as a way to cope with their own issues but there's plenty of media out there that handle these topics just as well but let's not disrespect his boundaries. Imagine someone saying stuff like that about your characters who in fact have a large part of your own personality injected into them.

..ok...buf of all ut the whole creepy stalker storyline is like...actually canon? Sure I brought it to an extreme but he did stalk Jimmy in canon and he did create a shrine to him which would be a very very creepy thing to do and he did death loop him and never really treated him that nicely in canon It's not like I made s1 Fwhip do that, I didn't because that wouldn't fit with what we know of the character. Also he doesn't want people to make his characters do "bad stuff" did he really say this? Because real Fwhip is a man I find very intelligent and I would hope he would be more specific then that because that request in any fandom much less this is pratically impossible to mantain. And yes...maybe if someone did something like this with a character of mine it would be...weird... but I had people in my askbox telling me to kill myself for this arc and I don't think it would phase me as much as that...and even then the only thing I can tell you to do is not sending weird stuff in my askbox which some people do anyway, outside of that I'm not going to dictate what you do with my characters.

And well, what do you want me to do? Retcon that whole thing? Would it make sense? Would it be right? I don't think so. I don't think it would be right. The most I can do is mentioning it less and that is entirely dependent on the whispers not bringing it up like they did with the ranchers... If it make you feel better Empires S1 Fwhip will definitely be enough good to balance it out because he's cool and not a creepy shrine builder who eats rocks.

I do understand if you don't like it, I will tag tw: sa any time the incident is mention so if you want to you can pretend Jimmy is like this for any other reason if it will make you feel better... I know It's an unconfortable topic and hits close for many and I really want to show how horrible it truly is because some people (not you anon btw, this is sass towards another group of people) clearly don't know that... but this is a story of healing and what starts worse getting better and things will get better I promise.

And I know he won't see this, but if this really breaks his boundaries then I'm really really sorry Fwhip, I hope you can forgive me for this one day.