#(a lesson I'll probably forget the next time once again)

[da-janela-lateral]

@marbleboa There are them! Tsuchiya and Mukai have been my favorite Scars since their first apparition and it's great to have an excuse to finally draw this idea I had some time ago!

The reason I like them is pretty silly, though, as when I watched the anime for the first time I just saw a woman being pissed off because someone broke a girl's dolls and I went "oh, so they're like me and my little sister : )"

I wonder what these two were up to after the definitive end of Claw...

[thirstywoso]

LESSONS IN PHOTOGRAPHY (PART 3)

Jessie Fleming x Reader 18+

A/N: part 3 is here and part 4 will probably be out in the next week and then that's this fic done as I have quite a few other drafts/requests to get through

Warnings: Smut MDNI 18+, again I'll probably forget something but here are your warnings, degrading, spitting, praise, spanking, overstimulation mention, edging mention, oral both receiving, strap reader receiving, hair pulling, marking, name calling (slut), sex tape, think that's it 🙃

W/C: 2.6k

Part one part two

"Think it's time you take my cock" Jessie says

Your soft eyes widen as you look up at her nodding profusely at her words.

"Please" you mutter blinking at her.

She gives you a smile, as if to say she's content with your response.

Jumping up off the bed she makes her way over to your dresser, from where you are laid you can't see what she's looking at but you watch her as her eyes scan the contents of said draw. Her hand lazily dragging across the toys inside trying to find something that caught her eye, her finger stopping on the biggest strap attachment you owned.

A smile pulled at her cheeks as she felt her stomach flip "ah hah!" She exclaimed picking it up. "This one will be perfect" she says turning back towards you so you could see they toy.

Gulping before your mouth hung agape as you watched the way Jessie fit it to hips, grabbing a bottle of lube squeezing some generously into her hand before working it up and down her shaft until it was covered in a thin sheen of lubricant.

Wiping her hands off on the back of her thighs she walks back over to the bed grabbing the camera and perching it on the chest of draws situated across the room from you.

Making her way to the foot of your shared bed she grabbed your ankles pulling you down the mattress with force so that your legs were in the air, feet hooked over her shoulders and your ass close to hanging over the edge.

Her eyes glazing over with lust as she takes in your naked form so needy and open for her.

It wasn't a new experience for either of you, that being said there was rarely a time where she wasn't taken aback by your striking beauty. This was something she would never take for granted and had to take you all in every time she had you like this.

"You ready?" She asks stroking your cheek "remember say the word and we will stop anytime" she states seriously.

"Ready" you respond knowing Jessie wouldn't start until you verbally gave your consent. After one last sweep of her eyes across your curves she looked between your legs where her strap was sat.

Slowly rubbing along your folds as her hips swayed, the image intoxicating. Holding on to your muscular calves spreading your legs slightly just enough so that she could spit on your visibly dripping pussy.

An act that you'd never really thought you'd enjoy and in some cases repulsed you but somehow the way she did it turned you on all the more.

Letting go of one of your calves freeing up her hand she grabs hold of the base of her cock, pulling back slightly massaging the head of her cock through your slick folds earning her a gasp.

A smile made its way on to her face, she loved pulling noises like that from you and without a doubt it always inflated her ego.

Her eyes trained on you once again, herself getting incredibly turned on by any slight reaction that you had. The way your lip twitches or eyes squeeze shut trying to hold back your eagerness. The way your breath hitches in your throat as she teases your entrance or the way your fingers dance across the soft Egyptian cotton sheets.

Your girlfriend so desperately wanting to fuck you within an inch of your life, being torn between slamming into you or enjoying the way she was teasing you with the small noises that she was getting as feedback.

Ultimately she decided to carry on teasing you a little while longer, impressed with her own self restraint as her other hand let go of your calve leaning forward cupping your breast, sighing as your nipples hardened under her cool touch.

Her fingers trailed across from one of your peaks to the other. Lighting a fire trail across your skin with each swipe, her finger tips slowly inching towards your stiff bundles of nerves. Tweaking them gently before adding a little more force, a high pitched squeak making its way from somewhere deep inside of you.

After what felt like a life time of her teasing you, you could no longer hold back from the need you felt in the pit of your stomach.

"Please just fuck me Jessie" you let out perhaps a little too eagerly

A simple woman such as herself could not hold back from a request of that nature from a woman like yourself.

Letting go of your nipples and lining herself up with your soaked cunt, pushing herself forward as she grabbed onto the back of your thighs effectively bending you in half.

Slowly opening you up and working herself into you, making sure to give you exactly what you had wanted.

It wasn't long before she bottomed out in you, her on her tippy toes grinding herself down into you. Leaning down trapping your lips in a heated kiss.

Holding your legs over her shoulders as she pulled out and slammed back in a shuddering breath shared between the both of you.

It was then Jessie's lips attached to your neck, nipping and biting at the warm flesh and soothing over it with her hot wet tongue. A trail of fresh hickies making their way from behind your ear and across your neck towards your collar bone, a way of letting every one know who's girl you were.

Of course Jessie felt bad knowing you wouldn't be able to leave the house for days unless you wanted people to know how much of an absolute slut you had been for her but it also spurred her on to fuck you and own you harder.

As her ferocious pace picked up you began clawing at her back, digging in your nails as she hissed into your neck your heels digging into her shoulders stabilising yourself.

She bites down hard as you pant and whine into her ear, turning ever so slightly so your mouth was as close to her ear as possible in this position. Small whines of her name and pleads to be fucked harder only for her to hear.

"Fuck me Jessie"

"Put a baby in me"

"Make me forget what day of the week it is"

"Hmph... eugghhh"

"That's it"

Her hips almost stuttered listening to you becoming so vocal but she regained her composure, goosebumps littering her skin as the hair on the back of her neck raises as she intently listens to you.

Your hands found Jessie's curls scratching along her scalp as she worked her way into you, each thrust ending with her bottoming out and grinding into you, her cock hitting just the right spot as your clit bumped along her toned abdomen.

Just the thought of her abs tensing against your sensitive little bud drove you wild, you had always loved her physique but even more so when you could feel it as she took over your body.

Turning her head she kissed you, allowing it to deepen immediately, your tongues snaking over each others fighting for dominance before you sucked down gently on hers. Swallowing your moans only fuelled the fire in her belly more.

Her tongue licked into your waiting mouth for a little longer until you felt your head wanting to explode from all the different sensations you were feeling.

Pulling back slightly so she was propped up on to her bulging biceps, veins popping from her forearms, causing another gush of arousal to coat her thickness.

Looking down at you in awe as she fucked you harder, no more grinding into you as your hips met instead relentlessly pounding into you, shouts and yelps falling helplessly from your mouth as you took everything she gave.

The sound of you swallowing her into your needy pussy filling the room, along with both her whimpers and yours. The slap of her thighs against the back of yours being the most prominent sound in the room.

Within a heartbeat Jessie was grabbing your cheeks between her forefinger and thumb squeezing hard so your mouth fell open, looking longing into your eyes.

"Tongue out"

You comply with Jessie's request demand.

"Such a pretty fucking slut" she says lost in thought

"Only for you Jessie" you say before you stick your tongue back out.

Jessie spitting into your mouth, her fingers quickly following pushing into your mouth making sure you swallow.

Watching in awe as you suck and lick at her digits which still faintly taste of you. Groaning at the way your tongue swirled around her middle finger before changing across to your ring finger and back as they curled and fucked into your throat opening it up.

"Fuck, I wish I could cum in that pretty little throat of yours and watch you swallow me"

You grunt in response mouth to full of Jessie's fingers to make any verbal recognition to her statement.

Taking her fingers from your mouth trailing them between you to where she reaches your throbbing clit, deciding against being gentle and instead rapidly flicking it between her fingers, rubbing down on it and gently pinching at the bundle of nerves.

Grinding her fingers down harshly, speeding up every time she hears a sigh fall from your mouth. Content with her actions and your reactions she carried on watching you like this for a little while longer.

Before long she's having you writhe beneath her as she pushes your legs even further back hitting deeper inside than she has before. A piercing screaming ripping from your core right out your throat as she slammed into you repeatedly hitting these new depths. Your clit being thrummed into as you take her the best you can.

Planting her feet back firmly on the ground, Jessie pushed into you deeper and harder than before finding more leverage from her new footing. The speed and pressure only building something with in you.

Holding back tears only turns her on more as she squeezes your cheeks once again your tongue poking out knowing exactly what she wanted as she spat in your mouth one last time.

Swallowing as you felt yourself reach the edge, your sweet spot being hit repeatedly eyes squeezing shut seeing stars. Only to have the sensation ripped from you as she pulled out.

Before you could even protest she was knelt on the floor at the foot of the bed with your legs hooked over her shoulders pulling you closer to the edge. Without a second to spare Jessie's tongue was deep inside your clenching hole.

Squeezing down on her tongue as it disappeared inside of you lapping up your excitement, before taking your clit between her teeth flicking it with her tongue and grazing at it with her teeth, she alternated between this and messily eating your core.

This was by far your girlfriends favourite activity, it took everything in her not to absolutely ruin you like this. In her opinion there was not a prettier noise in the world than they way you cried out as she ate you.

What felt like hours of her doing this was in reality only seconds, before you knew it your hands shot into her hair as you came all down her chin. Shaking in her arms as she cleaned you up, licking and sucking along your thighs and folds until you were completely void of any arousal.

Bending down and kissing you so you could taste yourself was not only extremely attractive for her but you loved making a show of hungrily kissing her face and tasting yourself. Closing your eyes and moaning only working Jessie up even more.

Adequately cleaning the arousal from Jessie's face she began standing up she pulled you once again so you fell to the floor on your knees.

"Clean me up" she said rather coldly, you'd probably take this as offence if you didn't know how Jessie liked to be in the bedroom and in all honesty you found this dominant stone cold Jessie so hot that it made your ovaries burst for her.

Contemplating disobeying her and receiving some kind of punishment wether it being orgasm denial, overstimulation or a spanking remembering back to the time that you had not done as requested and had teased Jessie at a team event.

She had bent you over her knee and spanked you until your ass was covered in her handprints and was warm to the touch, she had then edged you for hours and hours until she began feeling guilty and accidentally overstimulated you when she finally let you cum.

Ultimately deciding to obey her and have her praise you instead you take Jessie's cock in your mouth cheeks hollowing as you bob up and down on her cock, speeding up as her grip on your hair tightens.

Tasting yourself you begin to groan at how delicious you really taste

"You're such a good girl swallowing my cock like that" she chokes out in disbelief as she disappears all the way down your throat before appearing again.

You blink up at her with a sultry smirk as you continue to work along her shaft, earning some moans from Jessie as your nails rake along her thighs.

Grabbing your hair harder she fucks into your throat gagging you repeatedly until salvia was dripping from your mouth down onto the carpet.

Pulling your hair as her head falls back, ungodly noises and phrases coming from the back of her throat as she pounds yours harder.

"Fuck.. let me cum.. in your mouth" she stutters out as her legs give way, awkwardly you catch her in your arms as her cock hits the back of your throat making you gag harder than before. The sensation vibrating into Jessie's core.

A loud moan ripping from her as she also reaches her peak. Falling into your arms curling into you as you lazily dip your fingers in her cum soaked pussy and bringing them back to your mouth.

Sucking them clean your eyes roll back at the taste of her, removing her strap you couldn't help yourself but push Jessie's legs back. Diving into her sweet wet heat, lapping at her folds.

Your tongue curling deep inside her, stroking along her walls before sucking on her clit. Grabbing onto her breasts to steady yourself as you fuck her into the floor with your mouth.

Alternating between gentle kisses across her opening to harsh flicks of your tongue across her bud, before teasing her slit with your tongue. Dipping in occasionally and groaning and the intoxicating taste.

Gently stroking her thighs as you mouths vice like grip on her centre relented trying to ground her but not working being overstimulated from moments ago it's not long before Jessie is cumming for a second time.

"That's it baby swallow my cum" she groans as you swallow down every drop from her soaked pussy.

Kissing your way back up her body you both cuddle into each other on the carpet. The camera forgotten about on the side.

After awhile of lying in a heap on the floor with Jessie too spent for either of you to move, you both drift off.

The next thing you remember is waking up the next morning in your empty bed.

Reading the clock you realise Jessie must be at training now, as you sit up and take in your reflection in the mirror you see the marks Jessie left the night before littering your skin.

Your finger tips trace over the purpling bruises, feeling the heat rise in your core again as your eyes flicker over to where the camera sits on the side.

That's when a great idea comes to mind.

[thesamoanqueen]

Anatomy of an affair II

A/N: second chapter and I think I'll finish this mini series in the next one, but I hope this isn't useless anyway because I really tried to build a particular tension... y'all know what I mean. Once again, dedicated to Aly~

The first lessons had been... an experience, let's say. The classroom was always packed, a crowd just waiting for him as if he was somekind of an event. Throngs of students in the front row hanging on his every speech, giggling and sighing at every word, always waiting at the door as if gaining the best seat and attempting physical assault at the end of the lesson would somehow make the difference or attract his attention. Writing his reports and some notes for myself, I learned that that kind of technique didn't work. Not that I wanted to look for the right one, on the contrary... I tried as much as possible to keep my feet on the ground, my mind clear and my legs closed so as not to reduce myself to those levels.

It was difficult though. The rough sound of his voice as he talked about muscles, bones and organs made it a challenge to focus, especially now that he was starting to get serious with lessons and I had to work hard so as not to end up like most of those desperate people who now couldn't find the show so entertaining anymore. My eyes constantly fixed on his muscles and organs, a perfect example of what a man should have been like in anyone's dreams, as if mother nature had taken special care of him to teach ordinary mortals. It was probably my unconscious seeing him like this in search of my well-deserved revenge on Tobert or maybe it was some kind of psychological test of my twisted mind to prove my dedication was stronger than temptations, but sooner or later would have been time for a real test and along with it, the others I still had to finish preparing for.

I was close going crazy, I knew it and with a sigh I ran a hand over my face, checking my phone to understand what would occupy my only hour of break that day. Lunch was already taken, but not by my meal and as if I had summoned him, Professor Reigns appeared in front of me again, almost making my phone fly out of my hand. I suffered from PTSD after our first face off and I had the impression he liked it.

- “So?” – he asked, with an amused smile, seeing me immediately get back on my feet like a soldier.

He absolutely liked it.

My mouth opened without a sound, unable to form even a silent insult, but as soon as my synapses began to do their job again I understood. The lesson, he was talking about the lesson. He wanted the report and didn't care what I was doing with my phone or my life. Of course.

- “It was... intense” – I admitted, seeing him listen carefully – “I think more than a few people got lost towards the middle now that we’re going deeper. There are already requests for more information, should be the same topics I wrote down during the lesson, I have the note here...” - I started rummaging in my bag looking for the notebook in which I had taken them, realizing with a silent curse that it was identical to the others that I constantly dragged with me to study everywhere.

- “It's here somewhere... just a moment, it's right here” – I apologized, already feeling anxiety increase as seconds passed and he waited, looking at me in silence.

I hadn't lost it, I couldn't have lost it, I had put everything back in my bag leaving the room empty, I had been very meticulous, but what if it had happened? Was it a possibility? If I forgot a notebook I could forget a gauze during an operation, a doctor could never be so absent in them mind!

- “Here” – he interrupted me, ignoring my search to hand me one of the cups he had in his hand.

I took it quickly, trying to continue with my free hand, but he stopped me, shaking his head, lifting my chin with a finger. The sensation, however quick and innocent, paralyzed me and I looked at him with wide eyes as he pointed the matcha he had passed me.

- “We’ll take care of your notes later, drink now” – he ordered more seriously this time and if my eyes were wide open before, they must surely have rolled out now, like in one of those cartoons I watched in Tobert's living room when we were both kids.

- “Me?!”

- “I'm a big guy but two is too much even for me” – and yes, he was right, but I still couldn't believe that he had bought something for me.

None of the professors I knew, not even the ones I was close with, had ever offered me anything. Usually it was students who did it, a show of respect, the opposite was strange, it couldn't happen... or could it? He had done it and he was acting like it was no big deal. Maybe he felt obligated because it was almost lunch time and he had asked me to stay longer, hadn't I seemed happy? Had I made a bad impression?

Trying to regain myself, I followed him as he headed down the avenue that led to the residential area of the campus.

- “It wasn't necessary, I could have taken it myself if”-

- “Tea is a natural cortisol inhibitor and you should keep your levels low.”

I had to keep what low? Jesus, I wasn't sleeping well and I had so many thoughts on my mind but was I really in such bad shape he suspected I was unwell?! I looked at myself in the mirror that morning, I wasn't so horrible, I had also put on a cute new jacket.

- “It’s some kind of dyagnosis”

- “It's a lesson. You are used to doing multiple things at the same time, but add the load of studying and unnecessary activities, it means more stress on a daily basis and when the brain detects a stressful situation the HPA axis is activated, releasing cortisol. High levels of cortisol for long periods of time risk damaging the brain, changing its anatomy in some cases. Drink it, it can become a good habit” – he explained and my stomach did a flip.

I wasn't a kid anymore, but I had been taking care of myself for so long I wasn't prepared for that kind of attention. I had always taken my responsibilities seriously and he had noticed my efforts after just a month of working together, he had noticed what I did even outside of the tasks he entrusted to me. Tobert had never noticed anything, I could have been sick and he would have only noticed if I threw up on his shoes, for the shoes obviously, not for me. Yep, it was a strange comparison and had nothing to do with it, we didn't have that relationship, we didn't have a relationship, but it didn't change the fact he had been attentive to me.

- “... thanks sir” - I murmured, unable to formulate anything else, overwhelmed by a sudden sense of embarrassment and he smiled one of those absolutely inappropriate smiles, watching me suck from the straw to hide my lack of words.

- “You must be in a good shape” – his comment almost made me choke, but he didn't seem to notice, walking unbothered under the yellowing trees of the campus with his takeaway.

He hadn't said it in that sense, there was no sense, what on earth should I have been in shape for if not to work?! I just had to stop thinking and follow him. Yes, I had to, but I didn't know where and I was only realizing it now. In fact accepting without knowing what I was getting myself into, it was becoming a dangerous habit with him.

- “Where we going? The next meeting will take place this afternoon” – I remembered, trying to play it cool.

I was sure of it because I had checked before joining him in the morning, so as to know when he would be free and consequently I should be free too, but he had blocked me as soon as the lesson was over, while we were still in the classroom.

- “My apartment” – I heard him reply with his usual nonchalance.

The sound I made in response wasn't a word, it wasn't even a noise, I didn't even know what it was, but I started drinking my matcha again like my life depended on it because I definitely needed to lower my stress levels now.

***

The apartment the university had provided for Professor Reigns was nowhere near the dorms and had nothing to do with mine, in comparison I was paying for a stable to share. It was an big apartment, a real one, furnished and with all possible comforts, it had its own private parking space and a delightful view of the central building with its characteristic bricks and avenues. It gave the impression of a movie location, especially because despite being used by a man it didn't seem to be. It was tidy, clean, impeccable just like its current owner, there were even carpets. Professor Reigns had given me a copy of the key, so I could use his house instead of the office that was constantly besieged by students and once I had overcome the anxiety of being in his most private space, I was grateful to finally be able to study and work for him without risking collapse between lessons or unpleasant looks from other students.

With my laptop open and the last notes for the test I would have on monday in my hands, I heard the front door open and after a while I saw him emerge, his hand already scratching the beard that was starting to turn salt and pepper, in that gesture I had learned to decipher. He was incredibly dutiful, but seemed to have a limited social battery and quickly became disinterested in matters that were not indispensable or fundamental to him.

- “Something wrong?” – I asked, watching him take off his jacket to make himself more comfortable and go directly to get some coffee in the kitchen.

- “We have to review my agenda next week, some appointments are not really necessary and take up time from the research project for the course” – he explained and I hid my smirk, nodding with my head down.

Oh yes, that battery ran out quickly and he didn't even bother to recharge it. It was crazy how he was gifted with everything that attracted attention, but he didn't care. There were men who would have given anything to have a position like his and that kind of success in every field, when instead he kept his distance.

- “Chemistry?” – he asked, glancing at my notes.

- “I had answered all the emails and the outline for the next lesson is ready. I made a copy, it's in the other room along with the preliminary test drafts” – I replied quickly, closing the laptop, while he sat down with a sigh.

- “Stop making excuses Savannah, I told you to do it this way and you're doing it. It works, right?”

- “Yep… it's more comfortable than the office” – I nodded, seeing him mutter a "good" before silence fell.

I had been working as his assistant for a month now, trying to make the most of the opportunity he had given me, but I still hadn't been able to talk to him about why it all started and why I kept making excuses, even though he always seemed more likely to tease me than make me pay for something. I had prepared for that discussion, reciting it in front of the mirror, to my roommate, I knew what to say, in the beginning it had been the only reason why I had gone looking for him and yes, maybe now I could have pretended nothing had happened because we seemed to work well together, but I already had another pending conversation with Tobert and that was enough. I needed to get another man off my shoulders and another thought out of my head.

- “Professor” - I started, but he stopped me immediately.

- “Roman. At least when we're alone. I'm not a professor, I told you.”

Roman?! I tried to start a conversation that was difficult for me and he cut me off by demanding I call him by his government name?! It was a joke. As if I could ever talk to him with enough confidence to reach those levels! Yes, we weren't that far apart in age, I was sitting in his living room minding my own business, after the agreed time, while he was there sipping coffee in that decidedly too tight shirt and staring at me, but he was still a professor, a famous doctor. It was very clear in my mind whenever other thoughts crossed my mind: don’t push the boundaries.

- “I don’t think I”-

- “I do.”

Speechless, I watched him put down his coffee, those eyes that I struggled to get used to focused on me without the slightest intention of giving in, with the expectation of actually seeing me do it.

It was inappropriate. We didn't have that relationship, we couldn't, it was forbidden by university rules. I thought, I hadn't checked and I wouldn't, it had to be and even if it wasn't, my mama had raised me well. She had taught me to be respectful, not to put myself in unseemly situations, and calling him by his name seemed like the kind of thing that would push me over boundaries. Yet the idea of not doing what he told me, with his full attention, made me lower my head and nod.

I was thinking too much, he wasn't asking for intimacy, he probably just wanted some normality and I instead needed to focus on what I had to say to him to make things right.

- “I still haven't apologized for what happened the day we met” - I started again – “I... I didn't want to sound rude, Im sorry, my mind was somewhere else and I didn't realize I was actually there and not alone.”

I wasn't that kind of person, I didn’t like myself people who always made a scene, but Tobert had hurt me without even caring, I felt so humiliated and offended that I freak out. I still couldn't tolerate the thought of having wasted so much time on someone who after a month didn't understand I knew and kept acting as if nothing had happened. But I was trying to move forward, I was dedicating time to myself and not wasting it.

Something in the way Professor Reigns, Roman... looked at me seemed to change and I saw him tilt his head to look at me, thankfully without a trace of resentment to me.

- “It was quite obvious” – he commented at the end, almost with understanding and although I could finally have sighed with relief, I nodded, sucking my teeth before speaking.

- “I could have avoided it. It wasn't worth it” – I said, pressing the pen I was holding in my hand with annoyance.

Wasting tears on a boy – he wasn't even a man with his little shrimp between his legs – like that had been an insult to myself that I regretted terribly. I had known Tobert forever and yes, I had feelings for him, but he had never been perfect, not even close to being perfect, me more than anyone knew that. It was like adopting an ugly stray dog that you become attached to. The amount of stupid things he did or got involved in was unquantifiable and he hadn't mentally grown a day since we were sixteen. I couldn't continue to close my eyes, pretend I still didn't see like his mama, if after having put my future at risk to support him, he was now also disrespecting me sticking his little thing in every available hole instead of building a life together. The asshole would have paid me with interest, I would have made him miserable. I just had to figure out how.

- “You need help?” – Professor Reigns asked and I straightened my head, for a moment fearing I had spoken out loud, but he pointed to the notes in front of me with amusement.

- “Oh, no, absolutely not, I can do it by myself, in fact it's better if I go” – I hurried, recovering everything I had scattered around while he was away.

It was already enough to witness the process of him creating his lessons and preview his notes, I couldn't stay there and use him as a personal tutor when the week was already over. Plus it was also getting late and it was best to avoid staying until the evening, people loved talking about everything and he seemed to be one of the favorite topics for a good portion of the students on campus.

In silence, feeling his eyes on me, I put everything in my bag as quickly as I could to meet his gaze just before leaving.

- “See you next week then Sav” – he greeted me.

- “Have a nice weekend.”

***

After days Tobert decided to make himself heard. Our circus was doing great, it was actually the third time he had called me in a month and he had had the courage to ask me if I was thinking of coming back in the next weekend. As if I were rich or had someone to see again in that shitty city! But I knew why he was asking, unlike him I had a brain whose cognitive functions did their duty and by imposing calm to myself, knowing what I was up against, I had hit social media as soon as our unforgettable three-minute conversation was over. I obviously hadn't found any trace of abandonment syndrome symptoms on his pages, but another video had showed up, this time on the page of one of his coworkers who I had also known for years. A new butt in the background, the umpteenth night and I had started writing my confession to the police for when I’ll dissected him, I was ready to take my credit.

Taking me out to calm down – or more likely distract me from murder – had been my roommate's idea, but between tequila, spicy food and cocktails it had been inevitable and both Mya and my friend Shanice had joined, watching endlessly the new video sitting at the table of one of the many clubs under the Memorial Bridge.

- “You could wait and say no to him at the wedding” – Mya proposed, cleaning her fingers from the loaded fries with which we had tried to buffer the effects of the alcohol.

- “As much as I'm sure you'd be able to wait that long, he'd have to propose first and I don't think that'll happen if he acts like this” - Shanice echoed, shaking her head in disgust at the sight of Tobert enjoying himself without a single thought in his mind.

The proposal. I had never imagined such a moment, I was more practical than romantic, but I had always taken it for granted it would happen, sooner or later, because what other alternatives could we have after all those years together? The answer was more than I thought and they all led to that fat unknown ass that he was enthusiastically groping thinking I didn't know anything.

- “He's too miserable to afford a ring” – I reflected, downing yet another shot of tequila like it was water and both Shanice and Mya looked at me.

- “Damn Sav…”

- “Yep, maybe it's better stop drinking and watch it. Eats, is gonna help”

It wasn't the alcohol that made me talk, I was simply disgusted. There had been a moment, however brief, when I thought maybe I should give him a second chance, be the bigger person once again, for all the years we had spent together. The first kiss, the first time, I gave him everything, but that stupid asshole forgot everything as soon as I loosened the leash, to drool over a bunch of total strangers who wouldn't even answer the phone in a moment of crisis and certainly didn't know him like I did.

- “Is that…” - I heard Mya call me, pulling me by the shoulder and I turned to look, choking.

- “Why is he here?!” – I asked, staring shocked at the bar counter, where Professor Reigns was discussing with a group of friends.

With a beer in hand and a less serious outfit he didn't look like a professor at all, but rather the kind of trouble most women would look for, the red flag you hope for. He was smiling, joking, in the yellowish light of the place, with music and voices filling the room, I watched him captivated as he emptied the rest of his beer, those hands capable of feats in the medical field tightly wrapped around the bottle, his throat in sight, his dark beard. I felt like I could smell him even from where I was sitting, no chemicals perfumes, just the smell of him and it was a strange sensation that made my body tingle. I shouldn't have dwelled on certain details, I shouldn't have noticed them, but he attracted my attention like a magnet.

- “Well, he has a life outside of university, busy one too it seems” – Shanice noticed, eyeing him without the slightest discretion and she wasn't the only one.

We had only noticed him now, but he certainly hadn't escaped the eyes of the other women in the club. A couple of them sitting not far away continued to stare at him and chatter, probably waiting to meet his gaze for their silent invitation. I knew the moves well, I saw them every day in class and when we walked across campus together, more or less brazen attempts to which he didn't even react, almost as if he didn't see. And maybe it was like that or maybe he didn't stoop to pay attention to anyone because he was already taken, I had never suspected anything since I worked as his assistant, but a man like that had to be taken. He was the kind who would never stay on the market with that perfect body and a successful career.

- “You know, he could be your solution” – Mya mused, sipping her cocktail with a thoughtful face.

- “I know, that's why I keep working as his assistant.”

- “So you can smash him?”

- “What?!” – I almost screamed – “No! I was talking about exams! He can help me with my goals!”

- “Nah, stop it, you'll pass them anyway, your goal at the moment is to make that asshole of your boyfriend, ex or whatever he’s, pay and you could get revenge riding him. Mya is right. Sex helps with a lot of problems”

- “He’s a professor, my professor, a well-known doctor and Im his assistant.”

Hello?! Was it just me who noticed and had a problem with it? It wasn't something to do! It couldn't be! They shouldn't have suggested it to me!

- “More practical, no one will find out. You said sometimes you two worked in his apartment to.”

- “He gave her a copy of the key.”

- “Uh! Yeah!”

I had worked and saw his living room, nothing more and they knew it, I had told them!

… and also his kitchen, for coffee yes. And the bathroom, I went there too, but I spent hours in his house working, I had to use it sooner or later! But nothing more! I would never have dared, I was even careful no one saw me going in and out of there at inconvenient times.

- “It's on the campus, inside the university, y’all can’t be serious?!” – they couldn't make me think certain things, they had to support me, help me, not create bigger problems.

- “I would do it”

- “Same here. It's such a good idea!”

- “I mean, why not?! You get it?”

- “If not her someone else, take the opportunity sis!”

- “Louder!”

- “Ok, good, I've heard enough” – I silenced them, getting up and leaving my money on the table.

The weekend was already testing me enough, I couldn't stay there a second longer and put other ideas in my head, there were already enough of those on a daily basis and that I had to keep at bay without having received yet another delusion or getting drunk.

- “What? Where you going? Come on, Sav! Get over here” – Mya tried to stop me, but I had already taken my bag and jacket.

- “I'll take an uber, see you at home” – I said goodbye, taking my way out of the club.

- “Don't you dare start studying again!”

- “And don't open IG!”

I was no longer listening to their recommendations, too busy with my phone to understand how soon I would have a car to go back. In that part of the city there were many clubs, it was very busy, but to my series of bad luck was added the only uber available was fifteen minutes away from me and resignedly I tightened my jacket once outside, peering across the road, where I could see the bridge and the skyline over the dark sea.

This night had only served to give me other thoughts and certainly hadn't helped distract me from what Tobert had done, again. Part of me knew that if I didn't do something soon I would go crazy, every revenge deserved a plan to get some justice and satisfaction back, but I needed to explode, to punish him immediately for the wasted years and humiliation. Knowing he was out there doing what he wanted, thinking I was so stupid to don’t understand or find out, filled me with frustration. I was better than him and would probably be even better if I hadn't spent my entire life babysitting him, how could he even conceive of treating me like this? Me?! And with all due respect, for someone who seemed like the cheap experiment of a pervert who had never left home!

- “I thought you had an exam on Monday” – the tone scared me to death and I turned quickly, discovering I was no longer alone.

- “Professor!”

- “Roman” – he corrected me.

- “Yep… I have it, it wasn't a lie” – I hurried to explain and immediately bit my tongue.

I was justifying myself. In a very bad way too, I wasn't even credible and it was frustrating because it was clear I could have avoided it since being off campus wasn't a crime.

- “Breathe, you’re always so tense” – he suggested to me, his voice calm, low, so reliable.

Gripping my phone, I nodded, avoiding his gaze as silence fell between us and his words echoed in my head. I had the feeling the alcohol in my body had suddenly decided to make itself felt now he was there next to me, a mixture of anxiety and heat that went from my neck down to my chest, my belly and lower, made me feel vulnerable and certainly the conversation with my friends before leaving didn’t help. I hadn't thought about meeting someone I knew, I hadn't thought about seeing him or talking to him, I was just trying to get home as quickly as possible and try to sleep with one or better two pills to keep me out of trouble. My fifteen minutes of waiting, however, were becoming an eternity and my eyes went to the blank screen, a gesture he obviously noticed immediately. He noticed everything, always.

- “Are you waiting someone?” – he asked, checking the road.

I was far from home, on the verge of exhaustion, there was no one waiting for me. Just hours of studying and too many thoughts... maybe Shanice and Mya were partly right, it would have helped me distract myself with someone, but I had too much dignity to risk picking up another idiot, a life with Tobert had made me almost completely insensitive to men. Almost.

- “I wanted to go back to the dormitory” – I explained and he turned around again.

- “That's not the answer to my question” – his tone was more peremptory this time and I looked at his tense jawline.

We had gone from not having to give excuses to explaining why I was there with my phone without even noticing and the way he was standing in front of me was making me wish for more tequila in my body.

- “Im waiting my uber. It’ll be here soon” - I said, unable to look away now.

He was an exception. He wasn't one of the many idiots inside a club. He was a grown man, with a successful career, goals similar to mine, plans for the future. I knew all that glitters wasn't gold, I could see it in his brown eyes, in his dangerous smiles, in the way he seemed to capture everyone who walked by him into his orbit, but it was the kind of risk someone would even seek. And he was fascinating, so damn perfect he made the air between us and my legs tremble.

- “I'll give you a ride. My car is there, cmon”

Something in my head told me to accept immediately, a part of me even cheered at his words, the impulse that during lessons made it difficult for me to take notes and filled my mind when we were alone with thoughts I had never had for anyone else. My friends would have pushed me without even thinking about it and the alcohol was playing its part, but I still shook my head no, looking up at him from the distance that separated us in a weak attempt to resist and remind myself, him, there were boundaries I shouldn't have crossed.

He was my professor, he could have become my mentor, I would have gotten into trouble.

- “I can wait here” – I tried, but my words didn't seem to reach him.

- “I won't let you go with a stranger, get in my car Sav” – he decided for me, without listening any replies, taking a step in the direction of the street before looking back at me.

For a moment, I clutched my phone, praying for something, for someone, anyone, to interrupt whatever was going on between us, but it might have been fifteen or thirty minutes, nothing happened and I moved numbly, following him with my heart racing and sure I was about to do something I never imagined.

Tag squad: @sunnyfleur23 @racerchix21 @alyyaanna @expert-texpert @romanreignsdefencesquad @romanstheory @claymorexpunisher @keybladeofsteel @msbigredmachine @nayys-world @gobbersworld @utika151209 @cumxxslutt @civildawn @romanmydaddy @triscillal @papireigns-05 @helensanders92 @darqchilddaydreamz @unfriendly--blvck--hottie @nicolewoo @joannasteez @reignsx @kianaleani @daguenoire @extra-11 @333creolelady @snowpanda18 @brattyfics @mzv11 @romanreignseater @dreamsinfocus @vebner37 @depressedneedingrevenge @cyberdejos2 @mahi-wayy @jxtina-86 @harmshake @southerngirl41 @smile1318 @headoftheetable @sortudademais @wrestlingprincess80

[ch3rryc4ndy]

Teachers Pet

Relationship - Professor Hyuck X Fem Reader

Genre - Smut

Summary - After being forced to transfer university’s, you realize you won’t be missing the last one as much as you though once you meet your math professor

Warnings - teacher and student, choking, impact play, semi dubcon? (includes a scene that may be aggressive towards reader but all is consensual), degrading, language, pet names

"Y/N WAKE UPP" my roommate calls out from the living room. I sigh in irritation realizing my alarm probably didn't go off. I get out of bed and walk out to the kitchen and see the clock barely says 7 am thinking it was already almost 9 "why did you wake me up so early nayeon?"

"It's not early you just need to wake up earlier and be more productive!" she squeals, I sigh and come to the conclusion that she is right, I do need to start getting up earlier. "fine I'll go take a shower" I say walking towards my room to get my things.

[Time skip ]

I'm almost done getting ready when nayeon comes into my room "also since you are new here, we have a new professor. I know it sucks you had to transfer colleges but you'll enjoy it here!" I smile and say  "I'm just lucky to have a roommate as amazing as you" nayeon chuckles and hugs me from the back "now hurry up we are almost late"

Me and nayeon walk into our math class a few minutes early seeing a few people scattered across the room. We both sit next to each other and I look around scanning the room and looking at the fresh faces I've never seen before.

I hear anyone talking to one of her friends and can tell they are flirting once I turn around noticing both of them practically almost making out due to how close they were.

She turns around and introduces me to the girl she was talking to and says "Y/N this is Irene she's amazing, she's one of my closest friends here" I smile and greet Irene with a wave. She is stunning, I guess gorgeous gorgeous girls attract one another.

I hear the chattering in the class quiet down once I hear the door open. "Today's lesson will be on statistics and the way it affects us in the real world." I freeze realizing how good-looking the professor is. I was looking at him in awe when I feel nayeon hit me saying "I think you're drooling" and giggling.

I roll my eyes and ask "so what's his name?" she gets closer and whispers "we don't know his name he just makes us call him Mr. Lee, he's a total ass sometimes I mean that's just how Geminis are right" I laugh and whisper back " how do you know he's a Gemini?" I ask "it was his birthday a few weeks ago and some of the students brought him some presents" I nod and look back at him.

"girls in the back can we cut the conversations to a zero" we freeze and realize our laughing was too loud. "you on the left what's your name, are you new here?" I gulp knowing he was talking to me "my name is Y/N I just transferred here yesterday" I say holding eye contact.

"I didn't ask for your life story I asked you for your name, I'll let you off this time but I don't appreciate talking during my lectures" I nod and say "I'm sorry sir it won't happen again" he stiffens from what I said confused if I said something wrong. Nayeon chuckles at this for some reason. "no worries" he clears his throat "please stay after class so I can explain the rules I have in my class since you weren't here for the run down" I nod and say "yes sir".

I turned to nayeon and write "what was so funny?" on a piece of paper handing it to her. She opens it and writes "nothing he'll explain it after class ;)" I look up at her confused but forget about it getting lost in my thoughts and not paying attention to the lecture.

The bell rang for class and I began to pack up my things slowly when I hear nayeon say "good luck with Mr. Lee" and hugs me winking at me as she left. I roll my eyes in annoyance feeling a wave of dread wash over me as I make my way down to his desk.

He was leaning back on his desk watching me walk down as I fix my shorts. Once in front of him, I look up and realize how attractive he is, his features up close are insane, and he is super handsome. "I'm sorry that I made you stop your lesson because of me, I should've asked my friend if there were any rules" I mutter, he looks down at me and says "why are you blaming yourself when your friend knew them before you and continued to talk?"

I freeze at his words and say "well it was my fault I'm not going to blame her for it, I should've known and I'm sorry it won't happen again sir" he stiffens again and turns around.

Now sitting at his desk I walk towards him as he motions me with his finger to come to him. "first things first don't call me sir, it does sound good coming from that pretty little mouth of yours but don't say it in class"

I stand in shock processing what he just said, I feel a rush of heat rise to my cheeks and I say "Ok"

"what do I call you then" he looks down at my legs and back up at me and says "Mr. Lee is fine, while in front of the class, but out of it you can call me hyuck, or anything you'd like"

I see from his tone what he meant in those last words. I smile snapping myself back into a serious face. "is that all?" I say, he stands up and leans on his desk "yes Ms. Y/L/N"

I smile and say "yes sir- I mean Mr. Le-" I jump at his sudden movement, he stands up and grabs me by the face covering my mouth. "you're making it hard for me you know that? I have no idea why I'm acting like this with you" he sighs, letting go as he watching me closely studying me and my next move.

I drop my phone on the floor and look up at him while I get on my knees and get it. His chest starts to rise as he's holding his breath "I'm sorry sir I dropped my phone" I say looking him in the eyes with a smirk on my face. He moves his hand down to my face pulling me up from the floor as I drag my hands on his legs up to his chest.

He pulls me towards him, lifting me to his desk and pulling my face to his. I was going to say something but before I could he cuts me off putting a finger to my lips and says  "save the pretty little voice of yours for later"

I crash my lips onto him as I start to take off my jacket, I let out a moan, moaning into his mouth causing him to smile. He pulls my shirt up and says "no bra? You were just waiting for me to fuck you huh?" throwing it behind him not breaking the kiss. I eagerly unbutton his white shirt as he takes off his belt.

"shorts off now" he says breaking the kiss as he watches me undress. He turns me around and pushes me onto the chair "play with yourself" I look up at him and smile. He leans back on his desk watching me take off my underwear. He stares in awe while I rub my clit while not breaking eye contact.

"Hyuck" I pant out tilting my head back taking him by surprise. He groans softly as I pushes two fingers into my pussy pumping in and out of me "stop" he demands as I look up at him and slow down my pace. I look him in the eyes as I lick my fingers clean.

He pulls me towards him pulling me back up onto his desk as he makes his way down to my pussy and kitten licks, getting more aggressive with each lick. I let out a loud moan as he circles my clit with his tongue, looking up at me he muffles "you taste so good you know that" I smile and tug his hair as he starts to lick faster making my back arch.

He pulls his head back making me whine "be a good girl and keep quiet ok" I nod as he makes his way up to me unzipping his pants.

I kiss his neck and look back at him realizing how toned his body is, he has an amazing body I think to myself. He noticed me looking at his body and smirks thrusting himself into me.

I let out a moan as his thrust got harder, causing him to cover my mouth. He groans as I bite his hand making his hand tightly grip my throat "you're such a whore, first day here and you already let your professor fill you up with his cock? wasn't this supposed to be me explaining my rules? " he hissed as I give a weak smile due to the overwhelming pleasure "only for you" I whine as I grip onto his wrists.

This caused him to fasten his pace, smacking me, and causing me to almost fall off the desk "what's so fucken funny? Let me wipe that smile off your face" he says turning me around and laying me flat on his desk.

He lifts my ass teasing me with his dick and thrusts hard into me. We both moan, filling the room with clapping and moans. He grabs a fist full of my hair and pulls me up to his chest while pounding into me "I wish I had a mirror so you could see how pathetic you look right now, I'd fuck you in front of it just so you can see how pretty you look" he chuckles, I say nothing as he laughs and continues to fuck me hard on his desk.

I knock down his papers by accident as I try to grip onto anything I can. I hold onto the table as he pounds into me. Incoherent words start to come out of my mouth as I try and form a sentence "I said save that pretty little voice of yours" hyuck coos as his other hand covers my mouth.

I feel myself starting to orgasm as he hits my G spot. "H- hyuck I'm-" I try and make out the few words I could. " be a good girl and cum on my cock doll, please you can do it, I know you can" he purrs as he grips my jaw, and chuckles.

He lifts my head eagerly "I'm not done with you yet" he groans as he turns me around letting my hips go and leaving me on the desk. I hear his voice from behind me "get up now" he demands, I weakly lift myself from the desk and turn around holding onto the edge trying to balance myself.

"sit" he says as he's sitting down on his chair. I walk over to him and sit down on his lap "you look so weak already, did I already ware you out?" he says smiling at me. I fall on his shoulders out of exhaustion as I shake my head.

He laughs and thrusts into me again while he holds me down by my shoulders hitting a new spot and causing me to wince. Tears start to form in my eyes due to the mix of pain and overwhelming pleasure.

Hyuck lifts my head to look up at my face and sees the mix of emotions on it as his thrusts get harder. "shit" he says as his thrusts get messier, I feel myself reaching my 2nd orgasm as I drop my head down to his neck "I'm cum-"

He thrusts one more time, filling me up with his warm cum, causing us to both moans from pleasure. Hyuck lifts me onto the table and cleans himself up as his lap was covered in a mixture of cum and sweat. I lay there looking at the ceiling with my mouth slightly open trying to process everything that happened in an hour while catching my breath.

As he's zipping his pants he chuckles at the sight of me. He pulls me by my legs making me slide towards him and pulls my arms up to face him, " let me help you get dressed" he grabs some tissues he had on his desk and cleans my inner thighs up, pushing 2 fingers in me causing me to groan as I grip onto his back.

He pulls them out for the last time and licks them clean, "I had to get the last taste for today" he smirks. As we finished dressing it was hard for me to stand up due to how weak my legs were at the moment "do you need help" he says chuckling.

I nod my head as he pulls me towards him, kissing me "this is our little secret ok, give me your phone" he hums as he taps his finger onto my lips, I'm a bit taken back by him wanting my phone but I comply and give it to him.

He types his number in and names himself "HC ", he takes a picture of us while he kisses me on the cheek and puts it as his contact photo "what if someone sees this" I say with my arms wrapped around his waist. 

"well aren't you just going to have to hide it" he coos with a smile. I gather my things and make my way out of the door as he stops me "I had a great time today Y/N if you ever need a follow-up on the lecture don't mind calling me" he says with a smirk on his face.

"I noticed you weren't even paying attention to my lecture during class so I think you'll have to come over to my place for a punishment, don't you think? Maybe you need it to be fucked into you" he adds

"I think that's the only way I'll listen" I purr.

[rihabe]

riha has never auditioned for a company before.

to be fair...is this really an audition? she's auditioning for an audition, right? well...that's kind of what they all are, right? aren't most auditions multiple rounds?

she doesn't really know. all she knows is that if she's serious about accomplishing her mom's dream - her dream, by extension - then she needs to do more than take dance lessons and practice singing and rapping by herself. in the worst case, they'll tell her no, or won't say a thing to her, and she would've taken one important step toward her goals.

so she sits down against the wall in her local dance studio, and turns the camera on.

"hi, i'm hong riha," she greets the camera with a tiny wave and smile, "and i guess i'll just...get into it?" she giggles.

DREAM COMPANY:

"when it comes to companies...i don't really mind? i think they're all nice, and have their charms. i would feel bad picking one over the other." as if the companies themselves have feelings, or anyone working there would take having a preference personally. she almost said i don't think i have enough skill to be picky anyway, but decided that was better left unsaid. "maybe lime? lime's artists are very skilled, and i heard that they don't mind teaching people...i forget where, but i heard it," she laughs lightly again. "yuna sunbaenim was also really nice on next gen. and i like her songs."

PREVIOUS MUSICAL EXPERIENCE:

she smiles, nervous. "truthfully...i don't really have musical experience. i take dance lessons, and i've been in sports my entire life. music has otherwise been a hobby up until this point," she admits. "oh!" she remembers suddenly. "i can play guitar! and i've been practicing both singing and rapping. but that's all."

SKILLS: here

OTHER TALENTS:

"well...like i said, i play sports. i'm really good at volleyball, and football, and swimming, and tennis. running too! my dad is hong minjun, the football player. i'm also a black belt in taekwondo, but i'm a little rusty now. i can also bench press 58 kilos! that's really good for a women of my size," she nods sagely, "and i'm working to do better every day! i'm also a personal trainer. i went to school for kinesiology, so i know a lot about staying in shape." do any of those actually count as talents...? "i'm not sure how well that translates to becoming a kpop idol, but i think i'd beat everyone else at the idol star athletics championships, which is a fun bonus!" she grins. then suddenly, she remembers something very important: "oh! i went to university in california, so," she switches to english, "i'm pretty good at english now!" she gives the camera two thumbs up.

FAVORITE ARTISTS:

she hums. she did think about the question ahead of time, but she already forgets what she wanted to say for this part, and she doesn't really want to retape everything now. she could probably do better in general, sure, but - she doesn't really have time for that, either.

"i really like kehlani and tinashe," she recalls, thankfully. "i've liked tyla a lot these days, too. rina sawayama, conan gray..." she realizes this list of artists is very, what the kids would call, 'queer-coded,' and quickly pivots to kpop, since that's more relevant anyway. "and yuna sunbaenim," she smiles, a little shy once more. "and nana...nana is wonderful. i also really admire a.maze's performances. they're, um...for lack of a better word...amazing?" there was definitely a better word. she should probably re-record this.

instead, she lets out another nervous laugh and shakes her head.

"okay, i think i answered all the questions! this has been hong riha. thank you!"

[nabanna]

session five

-

derailing the impromptu pre-vampire-contact etiquette lesson to chant the DM's dad's name when he shows up in the background

-

Emerin: We don't want to offend the Count! Rena: This was easier when the main way to offend someone was insulting their mother. Or their proficiency in the bedroom Holly: I don't believe we need to think about Lord von Zarovich's abilities in the bedroom, Rena: He probably sucks, anyways– Holly: Well I imagine he does, in some way, [mildly deranged laugh] tend to, you know, suck, just a– Rena: Let's not finish that sentence Holly: Yes please do forget I said that I'll try not to be funny– well not that it's difficult for me not to be– Rena: Shh

-

fog of war complications

-

DM: ...dimly lit by fl– s– sputtering, oh wow using a new word here, K: First time using that word, DM? :) DM: (cheerfully) Shut the fuck up– Dimly lit by sputtering firelight–

-

DM: (fighting for her life trying to describe the dinner) J: Roast Beast? Like from Seuss? K: Like from Grinch? (me): Like from Whoville? DM: (gunshot soundboard) J: (dies)

-

DM: Strahd is going to insight you :) J: (audibly afraid) Uh-huh? DM: Would you like to roll deception against Count Strahd von Zarovich J: I don't know what does my -1 to deception tell you? DM: :) J: Okay fuck it–

-

Strahd: How have you found my home? Holly: (failing her autism roll) It wasn't too difficult, we got a map for the roads, and the castle itself is very hard to miss, quite an imposing structure /pos and that carriage you provided truly helped us over any other complications that may have arisen Strahd: Ah, I am glad, but I meant how my entire valley has been treating you :) Holly: ......Oh, ohhh,,

-

Strahd: Barovia is a beautiful country Solly:

-

Brunari: I prefer not to drink. It dulls the senses (looking at the aasimar siblings who both speedran getting wine-drunk) Holly: I will have you know, I don't normally drink that much at once, I was just trying to prove a magic trick and I was wrong. It was all in the spirit of experimentation! ...in the spirits of experimentation [mildly deranged laugh] no, you know, please forget I said that

-

Emerin: I presume there's no way to resolve this amicably and you do want to drink us all dry? Vampire Woman: GIVE ME YOUR BLOOD Emerin: Ah yes of course I was afraid you'd say that

-

Rena: When did YOU get here!! Serenity: I climbed in through a window NOW GO GO GO

-

-

-

(me): evil dice please work with me please evil dice I promise I'll be evil again I'll be so evil I'll kick an orphan in the next town please evil dice– Evil Dice: 2

-

K: I'd rather have Skeletor right now than Strahd, I'mma be honest J: Skeletor's more sexy <3

LIKE TO- please just stab him REBLOG TO- I'm begging you please (He is stinky)

[lulullia]

Back ✨again✨c:

tl;dr at the end

Yes, this is how mood disorder works. One week I'm working hardcore and drawing and posting all the time and then I disappear for months, because my brain decides that all this productivity is too much and it's time to go into hibernation (read: depression).

And if it's not that, it's my chaotically passionate side that absolutely can't do two things at once that makes me either game all day, write all day, worldbuild all day, draw all day, or code all day – with no room for sharing and socializing (yeah even my friends/family don't hear from me at all in these situations, even my phone is always on airplane and silent mode because I forget to turn it on when I wake up, for weeks).

Anyway! Instead of fighting this, let's just embrace it. I will probably never be able to be consistent at anything, but that doesn't mean I have given up on those things or that I am not producing and making progress.

I will keep coming back and reviving this blog over and over again, because I like sharing what I'm working on, and I'm glad I can do it whenever I feel like it. I think, what I need to do is not force myself to come up with content for the blog, but instead focus on my creative projects and skills, and share that if I have something of value to share.

I will stop trying to make a buffer of posts and scheduling them, even if it might hurt my blog to have periods of inactivity, because that puts pressure on me that by the time the buffer is gone I should have another batch of stuff prepared.

No, that doesn't work with the way I function, so after this lesson learnt, let's try something new: at the end of each day, if I found that I did something worth sharing, I share it there and then. Quick summaries from the top of my head, no friction, no reason to procrastinate.

Let's see if that works c: Until next time,

~ Luli

PS: I want to eventually setup a Ko-Fi. Keyword being "eventually", since of course I have nothing to provide now and I decided to focus on my creative projects first, but I just wanted to leave it out here, I may use it as a sort of newsletter to summarize noteworthy updates… eventually.

tl;dr

My sudden periods of inactivity are due to my mood disorder and chaotically passionate brain.

I'm not gonna fight it anymore, from now on being consistent isn't my goal, instead…

…I'll start posting at the end of every day if I did something worth sharing that day.

Which means I'll be focusing on progressing on my creative projects, not making content for the blog (but that might result in more content for the blog, paradoxally).

[britneyshakespeare]

The girls can’t wait any longer for Broad Sea and Empty Sky: China's First Great Modern Poet, Xu Zhimo by Dorothy Trench Bonett to be released... 

[yurtletheturtlehenderson]

The Stolen Umbrella || TUA Rewrite --- ꒰ run boy, run pt. 10 ꒱

A Diego Hargreeves x F!Reader Series

𝘈𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘴𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘺 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘭 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘝𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘢, 𝘍𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘩𝘶𝘯𝘵𝘴 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘰𝘸𝘯𝘦𝘳 𝘰𝘧 𝘢 𝘧𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘦𝘺𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘦 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘶𝘯 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘵𝘸𝘰 𝘮𝘺𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴 𝘢𝘴𝘴𝘢𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘴 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘩𝘰𝘵 𝘰𝘯 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘪𝘭. 𝘋𝘪𝘦𝘨𝘰 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘺𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴 𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘳 𝘧𝘳𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘙𝘦𝘨𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘥'𝘴 𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘥, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘥𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘢𝘭𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘺 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘩𝘦𝘳?

☂︎ 𝔱𝔰𝔲 | ❛ ꜰᴀᴍɪʟʏ. ɪᴛ'ꜱ ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴇᴀꜱʏ ❜

CW⚠️: very subtle but intense manipulation (basically anytime Leonard is here), implications to emotional abuse (how grace behaves, it's still interpretive), brief description of panic attacks (thanks reg)

📝: drew a bit of inspo from willie nelson

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

❛❛𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓'𝐒 𝐂����𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐀𝐋𝐎𝐍𝐆,❜❜

The man who introduced himself as Leonard perked at Vanya's praise at his squeaky rendition of Frere Jacques. Their lessons had been going surprisingly smooth, she couldn't remember the last time someone was this eager to learn. Someone who wasn't discouraged when they messed up or were corrected.

"Looks like I picked the right teacher," he shrugged.

"Oh," Vanya smiled, shaking her head as if it would somehow shake the smile from her lips. "well, I'm glad someone thinks so,"

Vanya quickly explains at Leonard's expression. "My next student could probably lecture me on what I'm doing wrong. She's... She's a bit of a prodigy." You'd be surprised how many of my students actually come to me to learn violin, she thinks. But Vanya doesn't have the courage to say it aloud. This was going so well. Not one mention of her relations to the academy, her siblings, or if she were to pick up crime-fighting ever again. She was just Vanya.

"Well, you can relax," assures Leonard, as if reading her thoughts. "I've never been a prodigy at anything," His eyes, far away, crinkle as he chuckles with a bitter shake of his head. "much to my father's chagrin."

Vanya nods solemnly, her words slipping past her lips without thought. "Well, that makes two of us," she gulped, fearful of what she just brought forth. That and the twinkle in his eye she thought she saw. She didn't have time to decide, he had flashed her a polite smile and awkwardly cleared his throat.

"So--"

"I'll see you next week," she knows she's cut him off, but her fear of the dreaded White Violin talk was motivation enough to make sure this ended on a good note. "and, uh, practice the hold-don't forget your posture, and uh, maybe get a violin." Part of Vanya was relieved when he chuckled with her, the other half wondering why he hadn't said anything yet.

"You can be honest," he begins. They had already risen from their seats, Vanya taking from him her first violin and propping it delicately on the couch. "Do you think it's weird wanting to learn violin this late in life?"

Relieved, Vanya quickly shakes her head. "No, no. Monet didn't really start painting until his forties. He did alright for himself," Leonard smiled fondly at that. "No, if you love music then you're in the right place,"

At that Leonard gave a scoff. "I'd say you're describing my dad more than me. He was the music lover." Vanya nodded along. "No, yeah he, uh-- well, it's kind of why I'm here, to be honest. You see, he passed a while ago."

Vanya's face fell. "Oh, I'm sorry."

"Oh, no, it's fine. Really," he assured, digging his hands in his pockets. Once again, he rocked bashfully on his heels. "We had a complicated relationship. Didn't really get each other. No, yeah, he, uh... He and I had a falling out, and uh... he expected things of me," He gestured to the violin and gave an embarrassed chuckle. "I didn't want that weight on me-all that pressure, you know?"

Stupefied at how well she did, Vanya nodded after a pause. "Yeah," she nodded again, wetting her chapped lips out of nervous habit. "I do actually,"

Looking up from the floor, his dark eyes met hers with a look she yet again couldn't place. A twinkle she couldn't identify. Nevertheless, it left her curious. And his words were dangerous; they were just what she wanted to hear.

"Family. It's never easy, right?"

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

It had started with another hushed conversation. Another quick briefing before another person was made aware of your existence and you had to decide whether or not to trust them. But instead of others being prepared for you, it was Diego preparing you for someone else-making sure you were ready for whatever unfolded. It was a welcome change.

He had assured you many times he trusted this individual with his life, and for now, that was enough for you. But then you learned more about her, and dread sunk your gut. She wasn't human-she was an AI. Made by The Monocle. It was an all too harsh reminder of the life you left far below your feet and you could still hear his modulated voice as sure as you would for the rest of your days.

Diego didn't fail to notice the sudden and rapid increase in your breathing or your coiled grip around his bicep tightening like a python. The two of you stopped before the grand staircase, your eyes stuck where his had flickered to the balcony above and you spotted an alcove that held a small gallery. You suspected this was where you were going. You had little time to dwell when you felt his gaze on you; studying the rippling of muscle from your clenched jaw and the dialing of your irises as you finally met his eye.

You watched with the same intensity, unaware of just how vulnerable you stood with him here and now. Questions of all kinds were buzzing through your mind as they had been since that stupid door came caving in, but Diego occupied less and less. His motivations with you were less of a question.

"I know what you must be thinking," he had said to you. "but I think she might be able to help if you give her a chance."

"Diego..." your voice was filled with unease, and although that was all you could bring yourself to say, he understood.

"Look," he shifted on his feet, his eyes suddenly gravitating to the floor. Your eyes followed, listening to the steady breath released through his nose and the wavering in his voice as looked at his feet pointing directly at your own-his focus completely on you. "I'm not gonna pretend to know what your experience was-or hell, how this'll go,"

Diego felt a noticeable shift in the air pressure. He couldn't quite describe how he knew, but... he could have sworn it was slight relief behind it all.

"or what she'll know about your situation or-- or, if she even knows about you." There was a momentary pause. One occupied by the distant humming carrying like a haunting melody from upstairs. From this Grace─from Diego's mother. When he spoke again, his voice was small and vulnerable, so unlike anything or anyone you were used to. "But I think it's worth a shot."

He waited for what felt like a small eternity before you nodded, the sight gently tugging at the ends of his lips in the process. The pressure shifted again as you glanced down at your hands encased in his, only just now realizing he had taken them in such a gentle plea. You didn't mind.

"Thank you, Y/n," he said. Another tilt of your head told him you didn't quite understand what prompted this. And if he was being completely honest with himself, he didn't know either. He just knew he wasn't used to someone accepting the trust he placed in his mother. Just as you weren't used to the trust placed in yourself.

You held on to the feeling that trust gave you as tightly as you clung to the banister trailing to Grace's gallery. Diego remained by your side, departing only after a small, non-verbal gesture you barely caught before he crossed the hall to where a beautiful, statuesque woman sat poised on a plush couch. You weren't even sure she was real, she sat so still. Her golden hair was half pinned up, the rest cascading down her shoulders─not a single strand out of place. You found her so... unsettling. Though G.R.E.G.O.R.Y. had no physical form, you couldn't help but see the resemblance─the lack of blemish, how structurally 'perfect' they both were in The Monocle's work upon first glance.

A dreadful thought struck you at that moment, one that had been lurking in the depths of your mind that finally broke the surface; what would you do if this went south? This Grace meant everything to Diego and you feared what that might mean for your safety if you didn't trust her. It was enough to twist your stomach into knots and your grip on the railing tightened in fear of flipping the world upside down.

One. Two. Three. Four...

And then Diego approached, with every bit of caution and respect as he had down in your prison. She turned her head, giving you your first glimpse of the woman he called his mother and something changed. "Diego,"

Even from here, you could see the love in her eyes brightening up the room. Her ruby lips split her face in adoration and had you not known any better in this exact instant you would have been sure she had a beating heart. Whatever chilling, lifeless stature she had displayed seconds ago had vanished─she had completely come alive before your eyes in every way, her voice warm and soothing in a manner that tightened your throat.

A tired smile came to his lips as he took her hand, placing a gentle kiss on the back of her palm before kneeling before her. "Hey, Mom," With a flattered tilt of her head, she smiled down at him with a warm smile that contradicted anything you had pictured from her. You stiffened when she finally pulled her kind, now smile-crinkled eyes away from her son where they landed on your figure, lingering in the hall, almost completely out of sight. Her kind smile never fell as she looked at you, though her eyes now held curiosity.

"Oh, hello there," she said. You waited for any sort of indication from her that you were in any sort of danger, but like Diego, it never came. She looked back to him as he rose to his feet, her hand still in his as he looked between the two of you. "Is this a friend of yours?"

"That's kind of what I wanted to talk to you about," he said. He returned his attention to you, give you a reassuring nod to step forward. And with a pounding heart, you joined his side. Grace rose to her feet, her hands stiffly folding over her front, almost out of reflex. "Mom, this is Y/n."

You didn't miss the flicker in her eyes at the sound of your name-nor the slack in her warm grin when Diego began to explain your situation. Her eyes, crestfallen and somehow teary despite her robotic features, finally returns to you. There's still something about her that sticks with you-though you can't place what.

"Mom," His final plea turns her head, her sullen gaze prying off of you after many moments before she gives in to her son's aching voice. But she could hardly help it. These children were hurting. "I need you to promise me something,"

His voice is threatening to break, and you momentarily forget where you are. He almost sounded as frightened as you-as small as you felt after all those years. As angry. Was he angry for you, or had his whole display been purely out of validation from his grudges with his father? Was this only out of grief for learning the depths of his father's cruelty, or did it have anything to do with the way his eyes had been finding you any time you marveled in something new? It made you curious, in many ways as it left you in silence watching him swallow painfully. It stirred something in your chest, but it had been far too long for you to recognize what.

"Oh, my darling," A pained smile took over Grace's features, the warmth of concern still lingering in the hues of blue as she grazed her knuckles down his cheek. As if wiping away the tears that had yet to fall. "You know I'd pluck the moon right from the sky if you asked it of me,"

He winced as if an invisible knife was driving into his heart, and that feeling in your chest turned to a small lurch. He drew in a breath, carefully grabbing his mother's hand and pulling it away from his face. He spares a moment to look at you, scared for the answer he's about to ask for.

"I need you to promise me you'll tell me the truth--"

She nods, immediately. The pain in her eyes still lingers as they flicker to you, making your gut sink.

"Did you know about her?"

A pause hung in the air that demanded to be broken. She was looking at you again, the love of a mother still in her eyes and it put a lump right in your throat. The look on her face was chilling: her smile was screwed in place, as still as the ones in her paintings but you two swore it looked as if her mouth was fighting to speak. She shook her head with a sharp wince, and in an instant, the look was gone.

She was grasping at her temples, a new kind of pained look contorting her face that made you unsettled. Diego was at her aid at a moment's notice, his arm around her and deep concern in his voice as she continued to hiss and gasp in pain. You were surprised to find yourself almost worried for her.

"Mom, hey? What's going on? Are you--? Tell me what's wrong."

Her eyes opened, her lashes fluttered, and all signs of stress dissolved before your very eyes. She straightened, looking at her two new visitors and finding looks of solemn and worry.

"Is everything alright?" She's pleased to see her son at her side, and when she processes this she practically glows. "Diego, my darling!" She looks sweetly between the two of you. "Who's this?"

The words struck Diego right through the heart. That look in her eyes of genuine surprise as if none of the past two minutes had ever happened. He could feel your eyes on him as his shoulders sank, but all he could think about at this moment is what he assured the others of yesterday. She just needs to recharge. He kept telling himself this even when he found her attempting to boil an empty pot on the stove.

The only thing to ease Diego from his crestfallen state was the presence of the grip tightening in his chest from your growing concern affecting the atmosphere. That and the expectant gaze from his awaiting mother. With a shallow breath, he swallowed the rock seeding in his throat and gestured to you with a tight-lipped smile.

"Mom, I already told you," His voice ached in a gentle plea. He wanted her to remember, he knew it was dangerous for her to be in such a state around the others. "this is Y/n."

The two of you studied the strained flutter of her eyes as she turned to look at you-that warmth you had seen was dimming. Like she was fighting to keep the lights on deep inside. Like she was fighting to break her programming.

All the same, she put on a polished grin.

"Lovely to meet you, dear," Robots couldn't cry could they? You wondered, catching the sight of her eyes. "To what do I owe the pleasure?"

"Dad kidnapped her. Twenty-eight years ago," your head snapped to Diego, surprised by his quick answer and hardened tone.

Diego was taken by surprise, himself. The answer came blurting out of his mouth without refrain or regret. But the not knowing had been slowly gnawing at his insides, leaving him questing his entire life. Had the one and only steady figure in his life-his anchor-been just as nefarious and unstable as the others? Was there no one he could trust but himself?

Everything about the mechanical mother was stilled, including the unsettled look glued to her face. If anything it had intensified. Particularly after a half-second glance past your shoulder and over the balcony where Pogo remained. It was a quick, but noticeable moment until a crack in her facade revealed itself.

"I'm afraid I don't know what you mean," Grace chimed, her voice as strained as the smile not quite reaching her eyes. "You're father is a good man-a great man. He takes care of us--"

"--Mom."

"It is not good for us to question his ways--"

"--Mom."

"--whatever they may be-no matter how much we want--"

"--Mom!"

Diego can't remember the last time he raised his voice at his mother. But you were already storming off down the hall, portraits from her wall that weren't already sucked to the ground were rattling on their hooks, threatening to peel themselves off the very walls lest they rip the nails from the wood. The sounds of shattering glass followed you bulb by bulb as you charged as far as your legs could take you before you collapsed in panicky sobs. Diego was sure he should have gotten whiplash by the double-take he gave between his mother and the sight of your retrieving figure.

Her face fell upon the sight but found herself unable to fix it. Grace was immobile. She could sense the distress she had caused and despite the need to help wired in deep, something dark and wrong was overpowering it and had been for some time. Clouding her thoughts and floating her through her manufactured life with little memory of what was happening. It was almost like a virus. A virus that gave her terrible headaches. Every time she thought of helping that poor--

Grace collapsed back into her love seat, her hand clasping at her temples in pain at the electric shock. Another headache. Like the others, it disappeared as thoughts of you-or any desire to help you-were wiped from her priorities. When she collected herself, her memories half present, she looked up to find Diego disappearing down the hall, hurtling over the stuffed beaver that had fallen to the ground along with several vases and candelabras.

With a small tsk of her tongue, she returned to her feet to get cleaning. If only she could recall what had upset Diego so.

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

You hadn't made it far. After stumbling down the hall and around the corner you found yourself in an odd corridor so contradicting to the rest of the house. It was all sea-foam green, from the wooden paneled steps to the cracks in the ceilings. It did you no favors, your head was already spinning and your stomach felt as if it was trying to invert itself. And your heart ached with stress and anger.

A frustrated yelp escaped your lips, born of your emotions and the pain in your toes from stubbing your foot as it caught the fourth step up. Your limbs were tired and the room was caving-or at least you feared it would if you didn't keep your emotions in check-so you didn't seem to care when you crumbled to the steps as panic settled in your heart.

Your throat burned with anger but the tears came anyway. It was a feeling you knew intimately...

The pain shooting up into your knees where they meet the floor were like butterfly kisses compared to the strain in your body to have made you collapse in the first place. It was like every muscle in your body was being pulled like taffy as you fought against the forces built to keep you inside. And that was just your muscles-your throat swelled with flaring, whether from screaming or the gut-wrenching sob begging to be released, you weren't sure.

That never stopped you from trying. Even with him in your ear.

"Number Zero," you cringed at the sound of his modulated voice. You had been in here long enough it felt as if it was coming out of every crevice in the walls. "Perhaps you should take a break? Your stress levels are climbing. Should they climb any higher, they'd be cause for serious medical concern,"

With a huff, you pushed yourself off of your hands and knees where you collapsed against the wall, your rear on the floor, and your hands plopping into your lap. Your mouth hung open slightly as you fought to catch your breath, your stomach twisting as you faced the single door to gave taunted you for as long as you could remember.

It's a long time before you speak. It's a long silence, your stare locked with the single white plated window that you didn't even get access to-why, you once asked? Well, so you couldn't break it of course-as you taste the spots of blood creeping up in your mouth. It painted your lips like watercolors as your tongue explored your inner lip, chewing on your thoughts. Finally, you speak.

"You don't care, G.R.E.G.O.R.Y,"

The black screen in your peripherals comes back to life in protest, the single cobalt line zipping up and down like a heart monitor. "Quite the opposite, child,"

Not a child, you think bitterly. Not anymore. You'd been here something past twenty years. And the very machine to claim concern was responsible.

"You are under my protection and guidance. Seeing as I was built for this very reason, I very much dislike seeing you hurt,"

Finally turning your head to face the faceless screen, your eyes sunken, solemn, and bitter, you spit the truth. You no longer cared if you made him mad.

"You hurt me, G.R.E.G.O.R.Y."

A pause hangs in the air. One you gladly bask in. Your head, still glued to the hexagonal-textured walls, rolls back to face the door. When you speak again, your voice is barely audible. It's a broken whisper, hoarse from your previous screams of strain.

"Won't last in here."

Another silence.

"Can't."

"I'm afraid you must, Number Zero,"

"Do not call me that,"

When he didn't answer, you realized you hadn't said it aloud. You didn't bother trying again. You thought about walking another lap around but you couldn't summon the energy. Let alone the fact a path had practically been worn in up and around the room.

"Is there anything I can do to soothe your nerves? Perhaps some gentle rain sounds?" You feel your entire body bristle. "...Perhaps not. How about some music? As you know, I have access to all, including your favorites, as well as selections you haven't heard,"

To be completely honest, you had stopped listening. With little knowledge of what he had been saying, you released an incomprehensible noise that could have been determined as either a 'yes' or a 'no'. G.R.E.G.O.R.Y., in this case, took it as yes.

With a cheery tone that mocked your very existence, the electric blue line beating along the screen twirled amongst the black as it morphed into several pulsing rings. He pulsed as he talked, all the while digitally thumbing through his files and ignoring the state you were in.

"Very well! Shuffling selection. One moment, please,"

Twenty years. You hadn't stepped foot outside these four walls in twenty years. At least, that's what it was when you stopped counting.

"Do-dooo do-doo-ooo-oooo ooooo doodoodoodoo!"

Everything was heavy. Your heart. Your bones. Your breath.

"Hello walls (hello!) (hello!)"

You couldn't be sure if it was the defeat settling in, or if it was just you.

"How'd things go for you today?"

You tried picturing your mother's face, as you had every day since you could remember being here.

"Don't you miss her"

But you couldn't. Her face was fading and so was she. So were you.

"Since she up and walked away?"

All you had now was fear for her lack of warmth. Dread that took the place of her love.

"And I'll bet you dread to spend"

Dread of that man coming back down. Dread of the weight growing heavier and heavier despite your lack of tension.

"Another lonely night with me"

Somewhere in your mind, you knew it was happening again. He was on his way down to visit you again-hence G.R.E.G.O.R.Y.'s increasing hold on you. The pressure is building in your ears.

"But lonely walls, I'll keep you company"

The fight to keep your eyelids open and on the plated window was growing increasingly difficult. Your blood felt like it was getting thicker and you feared you might fall in your drunken-like state.

"Hello window"

Time itself seemed to slow around you, including the music and its taunting tales as your eyes drilled into the walls. The only faces you grew to know.

"(hello!)"

The room was tilting sideways, or maybe you were-no, it was definitely just the room. Your bones were stiff, your body propped up against the wall like a ragdoll. Blood still creeps up your lips. The taste grew sharper as your senses dialed at the sound of the door window opening.

"(hello~!")

"Y/n! Y/n!"

When Diego finds you, you're folded into the wall against the first flight of stairs, just halfway up. He hadn't expected to find you so soon, he came barreling to a stop in the corridor when he did.

Your head was buried in your hands, your elbows wobbled as they propped themselves upon your knees. He could hear the trembling of your breathing as you attempted to gulp down what air you could. Before he could realize what he was doing, his instincts drew him in your direction. He didn't know what he would do but he knew he wanted to be near you-to comfort you. But his steps turned cautious when he heard the creaks of the walls and ceilings around him.

"Y/n, I am...so sorry," no answer but your zigzagging breath, hinging on your dwindling sobs.

Testing the waters, he inched closer. You made no move to stop him. So he got a little closer. Nothing. He reached the end of the stairs, his soft eyes boring into your figure doubled over halfway up the steps. An ache was burrowing within his chest, taking root alongside something else.

With no intention of going further, Diego hiked a leg to rest on the bottom step and opened his mouth to speak.

"'m not going back there," your voice came out in a low croak, worn from emotion.

It was a moment before Diego spoke, always in fear of saying the wrong thing. "I wouldn't ask you to," His eyes leave you only when the sounds of settling wood reached his ears. His gaze took him around the stairwell as he listened to your settling grip on the house that sounded eerily similar to that of the creaking of a ship at sea.

You haven't moved your head from your lap, but from here he can see the faraway look in your eyes. "Why?" you finally asked, your voice hardened from the lump in your throat.

The question confused Diego. You were still such a mystery to him-a big question mark. What were you asking, how he could help, how could he prove he wanted to help? Your question was presented to him in many forms: Why, did you bring me to her then? Why are you helping me? Why do you care for that woman when she says those things about The Monocle? Why are you not mad at me for storming off?

They were such a simple questions, and yet he had no answer.

It was the first time he managed to pull your eyes from their daze and onto him in veiled surprise, and all it took was another simple question. "Can I sit?" When you finally glanced up at him through your hands, he remained where he was at the bottom of the steps. Waiting for your permission to enter your space, at the bottom of the steps. His steps. It was a small act, but not to you.

Keeping a wary but curious eye on him, you softly nodded. He offered you a thankful one in return and lowered himself down on the fourth step, giving you plenty of space. He didn't speak, not immediately. Allowing the two of you to settle in the silence, adjusting to one another's presence.

Again, Diego continued to surprise you. He was such a mystery to you, a big question mark. Just when you thought you had a decent idea of who he might be, what he might do, he contradicted your expectations. Even now, as if plucking the thoughts right from your head, he shook his in disappointment.

"Look," he said. "I have no idea if you'll ever trust another word out of my mouth ever again, and that's fine. But you have to know..." His eyes bore into yours as he spoke, and for the first time in your life, you felt drawn in by someone else. Not the other way around. You clung to his voice, and that feeling of curiosity it gave you, unaware of the fear evident in his pulse. Not of you, but for you. "I am on your side." He had to get this right. "It's hard to explain, but know that, at least."

Diego decided to count the several beats of silence in his favor. Perhaps you were thinking on his words. He hoped you were.

"You trust her?" It was the first time you picked your head up from your hands, your voice, as well as your expression, was wounded. But what twisted that knife in his heart was the accusatory tone creeping up in your voice. Diego felt the familiar lick of anger that came with any disrespect towards his mother. But with a subtle breath, he reminded himself the only reason Grace had said those things, and the reason you were rightfully upset with them-all of it could be traced back to his father. If there was any anger to express, it was owed somewhere else.

Nevertheless, Diego answered carefully, his tone matter-of-fact but gentle. "Yes, I do," you looked sick with disappointment. It only urged him further. "but that doesn't mean I agree with anything she said."

Diego sighed, his eyes falling to his lap as his fingers fiddled with the gloves on his hands. He suddenly had a hard time meeting your eye as he spoke.

"I'm certainly in no position to speak considering what I know now, you know?" he cleared his throat as he gestured to you. His wrist drops back on his lap, dangling off his knee as his eyes found a tiny crack in the wall. "I mean, I wasn't taken or locked away, or anything but... Well, just try and picture that guy as a dad," a small, pathetic breath of air left his nose in an excuse as a nervous laugh and he shook his head. "He wasn't exactly father of the year,"

Diego missed the confusion that flickered across your face at that statement.

"He didn't kidnap us, but we were hardly his children. He never saw us as children. Never people. Our whole lives, he pitted us against each other. And now there's only five... sorry, six of us left. One's dead, the other disappeared for seventeen years. And now we found you," Now it was your turn to struggle meeting his eye. "So, no I don't really think he's all that great. Never really have."

You took a moment to think about this. You could tell by Diego's small, sad smile he wasn't truly mad despite his tone. If he was, you thought, then he probably wouldn't still be here with you. Making an effort for you. Coming through for you. Even after your lack of faith in his mother-the person he so clearly trusts most.

Another creak ripples through the walls. But it's the last Diego hears.

"I get that it's hard," he confessed after a long sigh. "learning how to trust people. It's...tricky. And I understand we aren't exactly the first in line. But if there is even a chance at doing some good here-a chance at helping you and stopping his twisted shit..." He sighed again. You noticed he did that a lot when he was in some way upset. He scratched at the back of his head before finally meeting your eye again. "even if it is unforgivably late. Then I want to help. I want to help you. If you'll still let me,"

Diego's next breath remained locked in his throat as you studied him. There were so many emotions dancing in your eyes, and the further he searched the deeper he felt himself sinking. The truth was, you were beginning to realize you might not know what trust really felt like. Was it truly something as simple as safety, or was it just an absence of fear? Neither of which, you were sad to admit, you could ever remember experiencing.

But damn, did you want to.

"No new people," you wager. You speak as if it's a negotiation-you speak as if you're still considering his help.

Immediately, he shakes his head. "No new people,"

Diego can't help it. A hopeful, twitching smile fights his way onto his face just before he pushes himself up by his knees and offers out his hand. He's flooded with relief when you take it. He can't quite explain why he feels the certain way that he does that he hasn't completely scared you off. And he knows it has little to do with the existing ties to your capture or his father.

Something similar was crossing your mind at that very moment. You were pleasantly surprised you didn't have to say anything for him to know what you were asking. Neither of you had really realized how much you had picked up on one another already. "I want to show you something," he simply told you. "I think it might take your mind off things for a while,"

The frown already evident on your face, you parted your mouth to speak. Again, Diego beat you to it as he gently lead you through the house. "It's nothing bad, I promise," he paused in worry, stopping only to gently question you. "Wait, you're not afraid of heights are you?"

"Diego," voice uneasy, you peered at the man with concern. "where are we going?"

Frankly, he couldn't believe he hadn't thought of it before. Considering how hard that image of you from last night had been to shake from his mind; the tears of joy leaking from your face and the pure, genuine laugh when you first saw the sky was stuck in his head like a catchy song. Going to his mother was what he would have wanted. He understood that now. Diego was still getting to know you, and for someone tucked away from the world their entire lives, he imagine they'd want one hell of a view.

The mere thought of being able to offer such a thing-to possibly not royally fuck up for once had gotten to him. He could feel it in a smirk splitting his face as he extended his arm.

"Somewhere the stars shine the brightest,"

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

I REMIND YOU TO BE CAUTIOUS OF ALL RESOURCES YOU FIND REGARDING AIDING THE UKRAINE--IF YOU SUSPECT ME OR ANYONE YOU KNOW HAS OVERLOOKED SOMETHING THEY ARE SPREADING, MAKE IT KNOWN!

Video as Evidence:

'Verifying eyewitness video Techniques and tools to help verify that a video found online or sent by a source can be trusted as an authentic recording of a particular event.'

TENT: Transgender Education Network of Texas

'TENT is an organization dedicated to furthering gender diverse equality in Texas. We work to accomplish this through education and networking in both public and private forums. Through our efforts we strive to halt discrimination through social, legislative, and corporate education. '

asianmhc

'AMHC aspires to make mental health easily available, approachable, and accessible to Asian communities worldwide'

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

Taglist:

@whatawonderfulusername @vicassa @ohmyitsfaith @white-wolf-buckaroo @guineverebeckilicious @a-girl-who-loves-disney @ongaku-ato-kakikomi @alpacataco   @okimreadynow @omni-idiot-fanfics @onlyroad @popacherryvisitalibrary   @disaster-magic @little-boats-on-a-lake @lonerstolovers @dumdumsun @night-yoarrbe

❥ Let me know if you would like to be added to the taglist! ❥

[reevezs]

It didn't take a genius to notice that she wasn't the happiest to wait for him that long, but as far as Eric knew, she needed a bit of attention to forget that pout on her face. And was he good at giving her all his attention. When she pointed out she wanted a frappe he simply winked at Yeji in a little "you'll be fine", knowing exactly how it would have ended had he ordered one. He had learned his lesson, it was safer to make his own decisions sometimes. Eric glanced around the cafe once more, trying to make it look casual, just to check if anyone recognized him, but they seemed safe there. Just meeting a friend. Not a big deal. No need for photos, no fuel for gossip. He leaned back in his seat and sighed as they moved on to the next topic.

"It probably is but it's not for me to decide." One day he would make his dreams come true and be able to make all the decisions he wanted. "Oh I know, getting fired by you would be a damn pleasure, too," he said with a chuckle. "Maybe I'll suggest replacing him with my brother. We've done that once. Rio will arrive on time, do the stunt, and no one would even notice it's not me." He sighed. "I told him we'd be a good duo if he turned all that parkour shit into a job..." Eric smiled at her proudly. "And you'd never have to wait for me again. How was your day, bella?"

Typically, if it was someone else, Yeji would be already on her way back home or to the mall or god knows where, but wait for someone to show up. Yet, this was Eric, a guy she had somewhat of an interest in which she tried to validate by him being married. Liking that little bit of a challenge it added even though deep down she knew it wasn't the case at all. Eric was generous with attention and Yeji simply breathed for it. So, pout not breaking as much as a smile wanted to take over when she spotted him entering the cafe, Yeji crossed her arms after the wave and turned her head to look out the window. A spoiled brad? one hundred percent, but she had a point to make. If there was one.

Though the kiss helped simmer down her brattiness a little bit, finally giving the male a look after a glance to the cup in front of her. "I was hoping for a frappe but this will do." obviously Eric would know better than get her one because after a few sips she always ends up complaining how cold it is, but again... making a point. "And firing him is not an option?" she blinked and finally took the cup to blow on carefully before taking a sip. Yes, one more lever of brattiness down. "I can do that for you if he is late next time. Always wanted to fire someone."

[kim-poce]

Probably not a series, but I'll write Mathia at least once more. Also, what? I wrote something and NAMED the characters? all the three of them? Without struggling? Alone? I must be broken.

Next

Masterlist

CW: captive, starvation, neglected, kneeling, rescue, comfort, no, no creepy comfort, heathy comfort, do I know how comfort works? no! Am I healthy? no! Enjoy!

=-=

Mathia woke up at dawn as always, he silently made his way downstairs, ignoring his empty stomach as he made breakfast, after so many years it was just habit, he put the food on the table and started cleaning the kitchen.

He was done when Joana walked in, she barely spared a glance at the kneeling figure in the corner, Mathia was relieved for that, she only pays attention when he do something wrong, something worth a punishment.

The smell of food that he could not eat was cruel, but it could be worse, be neglect was better than being trained, even if Joana forgot to feed him again it could be worse, and was thinking this way that Mathia managed to hold himself back from begging for food, it was only three days, he could take it, it could be worse.

As soon as Joana left the house for work Mathia started cleaning, he used to hate it when Joana was training him, and she used to make him bleed anytime he refused to clean, he lost count of how many nights she stayed up cleaning his own blood out of the write carpet of the living room.

He doesn’t disobey anymore, Joana almost doesn’t give orders, so Mathias does his chores of the day and goes back to the attic, he doesn’t hate the chores now, it keeps him focused, he can forget where he lives for a while, forget his own hunger.

When he finished cleaning and getting the food ready to heat up when Joana arrives he got back to the attic, he hates that place, there is nothing but a thin blanket and few clothes, nothing to keep his mind away from there, nowhere to escape from.

The worse part of the attic is that it makes him miss Joana, thinking that this could be worse over and over doesn’t make him less lonely, he cursed himself at the thought but he knew that he would be happy if Joana as much as talked to him, to at least look at his side.

Mathia used to misbehave sometimes so she would pay attention to him, sometimes feeling the pain and fear was better than feeling nothing, the pain make him weak and scared but the cold shoulder drive him crazy, he used to do this to feel like a person again.

It stop working when Joana found out, she got angrier than Mathia ever saw, she isn’t usually angry, and even if Mathia knows that she takes pleasure in hurting him he also knows that she never did it only for pleasure, it was always a lesson or a punishment.

When Joana found out she looked him up in the attic, tied up in a way he couldn’t move, gagged and blindfolded, it was a week alone, Joana would show up from time to time to give him water but that was it, that moment Mathia new she had found his weakness, he knew he would never be able to disobey again.

The day ended like all the others, heat the food up, put it over the table, kneel.

Joana remembered he needed to eat, but she also said she has no time or need to bother, so she just tossed an apple at him and left, Mathia cleaned the kitchen and went to the attic, just then he slowly eat the fruit, it was not much but at least it was something, Mathia just wanted something.

-----

The next day Mathia jumped awake with loud sounds, sirens, shouts, footsteps, he hugged himself and waited for whatever was happening to stop, and it did, the sirens went far away and vanished, but when he was staring to relax the attic’s door started to move.

Mathia tried to think of anything he could have done wrong, anything that would make Joana go out of her way to punish him, maybe he is late? maybe the breakfast should be ready already?

When the door opened Mathia was kneeling with his forehead on the floor, it had been long since the last punishment but his body could still remember it, so he started to shake in anticipation, his throat was closed by fear and helplessness was crushing him.

“Hello?”, a voice said, it wasn’t Joana, this is not supposed to be happening, what is he supposed to do? he decided to stay still. Until said otherwise he was going to obey Joana’s rules, so he didn’t look up, even when he wanted to see another person, it was only Joana in years, “Hey, it’s okay, can you hear me?”

Mathia nodded, ‘it’s okay’ must mean he is allowed to speak, but he won’t risk it unless he needs to.

“Can you talk?”, the woman said, her voice was calm and warm, Mathia felt stubborn tears leaving his eyes as he nodded again, he didn’t know he wanted someone to talk to him like that until someone did, “What is your name?”

“Mathia, Ma’am”, he answered, his voice was hoarse due to disuse and the limited amount of water he could have each day.

“Mathia is a lovely name”, the woman said, he felt like a small child, and for some reason, it was a good feeling, “Mathia, I need you to pay attention to my words, okay?”

Mathia tensed up, swallowing hard and taking a deep breath before nodding, trying his best to blink the tears away.

“My name is Pam, I’m a police officer”, the woman said, Mathia had his eyes glued to the wooden floor, “Joana, the woman who… kept you here was arrested today, she won’t hurt you ever again.”

Mathia lost control of himself and looked up, it was too late to pretend he didn’t so he allowed himself to look at the woman, Joana was arrested? Joana wasn’t there anymore? What did it mean? What does it mean to him?

“Hey, hey”, Pam called, “I need you to breath to me”, she said, Mathia didn’t realize he wasn’t breathing, “I’ll come closer, okay?”

Mathia nodded, the tears didn’t stop coming out, his body was shivering and his emotions were a mess, on top of that Pam’s warm voice was making his heart break, Pam got closer and asked if she could touch him, she asked.

“I have no power over my body”, Mathia said as he was trained to, his mind was too much of a mess to do anything but follow the rules, they were the only constant, the only thing he had that he could stick to.

Pam hugged him lightly as if he would break, he was breaking, “It’s okay”, she said, Mathia understood it, he wasn’t Joana’s anymore, this meant he could be himself and act for himself.

But who is he even? Mathia cried on Pam’s shoulder, cursing himself for crying for Joana, he hated her, he hated her with his all, but all he had was the routine, the rules, and Joana, and he just lost the three, he has nothing, he is nothing.

Pam drew circles on his back, gently trying to calm him down, but Mathia just cried more, he isn’t the same person Joana kidnapped years back, he can’t be the person he was in the last years without Joana.

Mathia could only cry.

=-=

@wolfeyedwitch I tagged you since it's comfort, maybe not that much in this one, but the other one will be comfy.

[ana-benn]

Chubbs

Warnings: Jamie Benn, male insecurities manifesting as possessiveness, self-body shaming, it'll probably be a bit smutty....

A companion piece to Insecure.

----------------------------------------------------------

There was something amiss with your husband. You didn't know exactly what that was, but you only had a few more weeks until training camp so you hoped it would be a brief thing. That had been a vain hope after two weeks if him sulking through the house. Always grabbing a kid and finding an excuse to be elsewhere. If you had to identify it you could guess maybe he felt a little neglected this summer.

First you'd had family around, celebrating birthdays and what not, then you'd had to deal with a fussy teething baby and a jealous toddler, now Tyler had moved in temporarily because he was having his floors replaced. Something about a burst water heater. It was a far cry from a few years ago when you and Jamie would've gone traveling, and hanging out with friends. He was finally dealing with the family-man lifestyle and you could only figure he wasn't loving where it left him sometimes.

To be honest you didn't always love it either. You missed just picking up and going to watch him play in the middle of a long road trip, but pouting about not getting quality time was a bit much. It was just where you were with two little kids, and responsibilities to friends and family. Not to mention it had killed your sex life the last few weeks.

You decided naptime would be the perfect time to talk to Jamie, so after putting the boys down for their nap, and making sure Tyler had gone home to check in on the progress, you slipped into a bikini and went to meet Jamie poolside. You knew that's where he would be, since that's where you'd left him after Wyatt's swim lesson. He'd stayed outside reading when you'd taken the boys upstairs for nap time. It was a routine when he was home that he handled sleep schedules, but he'd let you sleep in this morning managing breakfast solo so you took the nap shift.

"Hey mister, can I join you?" You joked sitting next to him on a lounger.

"Huh, yeah of course," he mumbled not really looking up from his phone.

You began applying sun tan lotion, hoping the movement would get him to look at you, but when it didn't you nudged him with the bottle, "Babe, help me with my back?"

He looked almost wary as he took the bottle, and helped put lotion on your back. You let out a soft moan at the feel of the cool lotion, mixed with his rough hands. You felt him falter, before he quickly finished and went back to his phone.

You rolled your eyes at that, "What are you doing, Jame?"

"Just reading some stuff the trainers sent over," he said. "Wanna get ready for training camp."

About that time Tyler showed up, pulling his shirt off and plopped down on the other side of Jamie, "Mom, Dad I'm home!"

You laughed, but didn't miss the slight eye roll from your husband. You filed that information away, as Tyler started going into a dialogue about how his repairs were going. Somewhere in that Jamie just stood up and walked inside.

"Sorry Tyler, he's usually a much better host," you apologized watching your husband's retreating back.

"Eh, I get it I'm probably overstaying my welcome. I can get a hotel, so long as your good with watching the dogs. I don't think they'll be allowed," he mused.

"Nonsense, I'm going to go talk to him. You're not going anywhere, we said you could stay until your house was livable and we meant it," you scolded. "Just...maybe, if you hear the baby could you grab him?" You waited for his nod before leaving the baby monitor with him and going in search of Jamie.

You found him in your bedroom, laying back on the bed with his arm over his eyes. You took him in for a moment before shutting the door quietly behind you. When Jamie didn't move you decided to just dive right in.

You moved next to him and sat on the edge of the bed, "What's going on Jamie?" You asked softly.

"Nothing, just.... Nevermind it's nothing," he sighed out.

"You just walked away from your best friend mid-conversation, I don't think that's nothing," you pressed gently.

"If his feelings matter so damn much why don't you go out there with him. You're not usually his type, but he's been known to make exceptions," Jamie spit out bitterly.

"Okay, what the fuck Jamie!"

The silence that followed had you going to your dresser, pulling on a pair of shorts and a tank top, "You wanna sit here and sulk, fine! But don't accuse me of that, we both know that's not the kind of girl I am." Before you could reach the door he was on you, pulling your small frame into his body.

"No, then what kind of girl are you?" He mumbled into your neck before move up to kiss you roughly. You denied him entrance for a moment, but a rough nip caused you to gasp allowing him in.

"I asked you a question baby," he growled out as he let you up for air. Pushing you back onto the bed with softer hands than his tone should've allowed.

"I....I'm," you're response was cut off by Jamie pushing your shirt off to reveal your stomach, finally back to it's pre-baby flatness, peppering you with tender kissed mixed with sharp nips along your skin. You whimpered as he used the time to push the shorts off your body as well, pushing your bikini bottoms to the side and running a finger up your slit.

"Come on sweetheart, you can do it," he mocked lightly.

"Jamie, please," you cried out. The absence of his body over yours for weeks mixed with his teasing touches leaving you overwhelmed.

"Tell me what kind of girl you are, and I'll get you what you want," he compromised.

"I'm your girl," you spit out, as he plunged a finger in your core.

"You are, you're my girl baby, don't forget that," he praised. "Now you're going to cum for me, just like this and then I'm going to fuck you right here."

He kept thrusting his fingers into you, adding in a thumb rubbing against you clit, "Eyes on me." He commanded as you fell apart against his fingers.

You barely had time to gather yourself before he had his cock inside of you. You groaned at the feeling of him sliding home, as he leaned into you neck releasing a small groan of his own. After a couple of testing thrusts into you he resurfaced.

"That's my girl," he grunted out. "Feel how well you fit around my cock? This pussy was made for me."

You moaned out at his words, only able to lift your hips to meet his thrusts. "Say it," he commanded with a sharp thrust.

"M...my pussy was made for you," you whimpered out.

"Whose girl are you?" His voice was demanding and rough.

"Your's!" You were rewarded with a rough thrust of his hips, encouraging you.

"I'm all yours Jamie," you whispered in his ear. "No one else gets to touch me like this. No one else gets to fuck me."

His hips never stopped after that as he shoved you over the edge, crying out as you came around him. He pounded you through your orgasm and buried his rough, bearded face into your neck. His nips and sucking would mean a dark hickey, but you couldn't care in that moment. His fingers found your nub again as he worked you up to bring you over the edge one more time before he painted your walls with thick ropes of cum.

You stayed like that for a little while. Just stroking his hair as he kissed and nipped at your skin, "You ready to talk about it?" You asked.

Jamie sighed readjusting so you were next to him, his arm around your waist, "You know how I didn't really start working out until I got drafted? I made it to the stars and a few of this guy's would chirp me about being a little chubby. Whatever it was just guy stuff, I started working out and I got a nickname. I never really felt insecure about it, until Tyler started walking around my damn house shirtless. All I could think about was that every girl seems to prefer that and I don't compare. Isn't that just pathetic? I'm jealous like a thirteen year old girl," he confessed.

"I don't prefer that," you replied. "I prefer the guy who is home to help with the kids, and always down for mexican food," You moved to straddle him. "I like that you don't spend hours a day at the gym, so you can come home and read to the boys. I like that you give the best warm hugs, and you always know when I need to cuddle. I love you Jamie Benn, not some hyper-sexualized professional athlete."

He kissed you at that, and grinned, "Didn't you make me fuck you in full gear once?"

"Shhhh," you pressed your fingers to his lips. "We're not going to talk about that."

"Fine then we're going swimming, it's hot as hell," he laughed pulling you downstairs, insecurities forgotten. You grinned at him as you just enjoyed his energy.

It was good to have your husband back.

[sanddollarpoems]

When I was a little child, I lived one block away from a public pool. Every summer my mom would enroll us in the children's swimming program. I started out in the "mommy and me" classes in the indoor pool. I can still hear the way the splashes echoed, and smell the chlorine. I remember the day I graduated to the big, outdoor pool. I remember standing so tall, knowing I was a big kid. I was probably around 6 years old at the time, but I felt so grown up. Still, once I got to the outdoor pool, I saw my next threshold... the deep end, and the diving board. My heart did flips just looking at it. Unfortunately, we moved away before I ever got a chance to try it.

Swimming continued to be a part of my summers, although my lessons were fewer and we never owned a pool. Still, my mom tried to make sure that we were decent swimmers, and I did well in the lessons I attended. I even got to jump off the diving board, and learned how to make a good cannon ball. But it wasn't until I was a freshman, just starting high school that I learned how to dive. I would volunteer at a kids summer camp every year, and there was a pool and a diving board. One summer, one of the guys taught a bunch of us girls how to dive. I'm sure he got a few crushes out of it, and that made it totally worth his time. As for me, I don't even remember who it was, but I remember diving. That feeling when you start to run down the board, the jump near the end, then feet together springing off the end, the feeling of going airborne. It's terrifying. It's exhilarating. It's the most amazing feeling. What I loved most was the plunge. That moment when your outstretched hands part the water and it swallows you whole... yes. That feeling. The cold of the water closing around you. That was my favorite part. As I would rush into the water, I would exhale, allowing myself to shrink and carry me faster in a perfect arc back up towards the surface. Then I would emerge, face first, breaking the calm edge of the water, and I would gasp in a clean, fresh breath of air. It was like being reborn. Like every breath after a dive was my first. Like my last life was discarded back on the board.

I don't dive anymore. It's not that I don't want to, but there just hasn't been an opportunity, and honestly, I'm a little scared to try again. What if I slip and fall? I'm not the young, naive teen, who is incapable of injury. Life has taught me that it can break me, it can hurt me. And at my age, the weight of this life might be too big a weight to shed. There are so many things I would carry with my up onto that board. No, I'll leave the diving to the ones who won't break on the water. Still, I can't forget the way it felt. Run. Jump. Bounce. Leap. Fly. Slice. Submerge. Arc. Exhale. Rebirth. No, I will never forget that.

[yesttoheaven]

I SEE YOU – chapter IV

pairing – arthur fleck x female!reader

wc – 2.3k

warnings – idk... misty being a b*tch with arthur?

a/n – hi everyone! I hope you are well because I'm brazilian and I cannot say the same lol the president is a piece of shit and he can't rule the country in the middle of a pandemic (not even without the pandemic, in fact)

anyway enjoy the chapter!

English is not my first language. I am getting help from google translator and he is not always a good ally, so I apologize for any typos or grammar errors.

Y/N – your name

chapter one. chapter two.

chapter three. chapter four.

"What are you doing here, Misty?" The surprise was notable in Y/N's words.

Many people could walk through that door, but Misty was definitely not one of them.

"I should ask you the same question..." The woman came over and put her hands on the actress' shoulders, smiling amiably. "But we don't have time for that right now. You have a dinner to go! And it is not right to keep a man like Charles waiting."

"Charles?" Arthur asked, trying to find a way to join the conversation. "Is he also an actor?"

After these simple words, the redhead burst out laughing and Arthur didn't understand what he had done wrong this time. He was just curious and a little interested to know who was the man who had a date with Y/N that night.

"Actor? God, have you never heard of Charles Lewis Tiffany?" Misty questioned how if the fact that Arthur didn’t know the man was an offense to humanity and Arthur just shook his head, too embarrassed to say anything else.

Who the hell was this man? The Pope? And why did Y/N have a dinner with Pope?

"It's okay, Arthur." Always so graceful, the actress reassured him and left Misty's side to be close to him. "Charles owns Tiffany & Co., the one that appears in the movie Breakfast at Tiffany's... Have you watched this movie before?"

"Oh, oftentimes!"

"Me either! And now Charles wants me to be the face of his new collection! I'm so excited, he came to Gotham just to follow it up in person!" The happiness shining in her eyes was contagious, but Misty didn’t like seeing Y/N squeeze the man’s arm gently.

"I hate to have to do this... the conversation is so pleasant, but we have to go, mon cher." With a smile, Y/N's manager adjusted the bag on her shoulder. She wanted to take the actress away from this freak as soon as possible.

"You cannot go without the VHS tape." Arthur objected, receiving a death glare from Misty, but the only thing that mattered to him was Y/N. "I'll get this for you." After these words, the man left the living room with a reason to make her stay a little longer in his apartment.

"Well, I think we're going to have to wait." Y/N shrugged, but inside she was beaming.

Feeling her mouth dry, she picked up the glass of water on the table, but that was her worst mistake.

"What are you doing? Don't drink this! That dirty glass is full of germs!" The glass was snatched from her hand and Y/N looked at Misty in disbelief.

"That glass is not dirty, Misty."

"How can you be sure of that? I heard that the Narrows sewer is one of the worst in Gotham!"

"Thanks for the lesson, but that didn’t come from the Narrows sewer. This water is from the kitchen tap."

"Oh my God..." The actress could have sworn that the woman's face turned green and she would vomit at any moment. "Why did you drink this? You'll be sick!"

Before Y/N had a chance to respond to these insanities, someone called her. She ran over to the bag and took out her cell phone. It was Charles.

"Hey, Charles! It's good to talk to you." On the other side, all she received were strange noises. The man's voice was being cut off and it was difficult to understand. "The connection is awful..."

"Why am I not surprised? Narrows is the end of the world!" Misty commented, rolling her eyes.

Without time for this discussion, Y/N said:

"Maybe in the corridor I will get a better signal."

"Be careful, you don't know what kind of neighbors there are in this place." She warned, listening to the door open and close, but Y/N said nothing.

Alone in the living room, Misty had the same disgusted look as when she arrived. For her this apartment is small even for an ant and this wallpaper is ridiculous, but in the midst of so much poverty, something on the couch attracted her attention.

"What do we have right here? I don't believe he has a diary..." The woman whispers to herself, laughing, after picking up Arthur's journal. She knew it was wrong, but she was bored.

The first few pages were OK, he had a shitty life like any other unfortunate person, but what came next scared the hell out of her. Misty knew there was something wrong with this man. The instant she saw him, she knew, but that... those words... were from a sick person. Arthur was a disgusting pervert. The redhead needed a moment to breathe and then she saw the magazines on the table and an scissors...

Oh no. He intends to include Y/N in this depravity show!

"I finally found." With bright eyes, Arthur looked for Y/N in the living room, but all he found was Misty... and his journal. "W-What... What are you d-doing?"

"Stay away from me!" She exclaimed, backing away for fear that he would do something against her. "I swear, if you get close I'll scream so loud and when Y/N comes through that door, I will tell her your little secret. She will be so disappointed, but she will finally find out who you really are... A perv!"

"N-No, please... You got it wrong." He tried, his voice taking on a desperate tone. Arthur didn't want to lose the actress's friendship. She was too important for him. "I c-can explain."

"Oh, can you explain? You will glue Y/N's head to a cat's body and then you will sit on that old sofa and touch yourself? You should be in Arkham! You're a sick person! I can't believe Y/N was alone with you..."

Arthur felt his stomach churning.

"You're wrong... I have a lot of respect for her. Y/N is special to me and I would never do something like that."

"I don't want to hear your excuses!" The woman threw the journal at him and Arthur cringed like a frightened dog. After hitting him on the back, the journal fell to the floor and when he saw those collages, he felt ashamed of himself. "Listen to me... I will say this only once: Stay away from her. It doesn’t matter what kind of fantasies you’ve created in your sick head, Y/N will not be a part of that. If I know that after today you keep talking to her, I'll call the police and when they find out you're a fucking perv, you will spend the rest of your days in Arkham." She warned with all the letters and threats, now it was up to him to choose to cooperate or not. This man is too old to play being a teenager. These images of naked women, these cats and those sad quotes in his journal prove just one thing. Maybe he's a sexual predator, but Misty wouldn't be here to find that out either. "Enjoy your pornography and leave Y/N alone. I hope I never see you again."

Arthur saw his world fall apart as soon as the redhead left his apartment with the worst assumptions about him. He was not a perverted monster. He would never touch Y/N without her consent and would never endanger her life. Never ever. Y/N was the only good thing about Gotham; she was a light at the end of the tunnel. So angelic and peaceful. Whenever she smiles, butterflies appear in his stomach and Arthur knows what these famous butterflies mean, but he doesn't know what those collages mean... If Y/N knew, she would probably be afraid of him.

In the corridor, the actress was trapped in a bubble, talking animatedly with Charles. The call had no specific reason, the man just wanted to make sure everything was fine for dinner that night.

"Okay... This is one of Gotham's best restaurants. Trust me, you will love the place!" She assured him, intending to make a good impression. It wasn't every day that she got a chance to dine with the genius behind Tiffany & Co. and represent that brand. This was an important step in her career. "Now I need to go, Charles. See you soon, bye!" Y/N hummed the ending, watching Misty approach where she was. "Why are you here?"

"It's just your friend's mom. She's not feeling very well..."

"Isn't Penny okay?" Concern crossed Y/N's face and she tried to get back to apartment 8J, but Misty took her arm, lying again:

"Y/N, don't be indiscreet. This is a family problem and Arthur is taking care of it." With those words, she guided the actress to the elevator, but Y/N kept looking at the door to Arthur's apartment. "You need to prepare for dinner... I chose a beautiful dress for you."

...

THREE DAYS LATER

"Put red on her lips... Don't forget the mascara... and on the cheeks use this blush... Not this one! The peach blush!"

It was possible to say that Charles Lewis Tiffany was taking the place of the makeup artist. The woman was losing patience, Y/N realized this, but he wanted to participate in every second of it. When she finished, Charles smiled, admiring Y/N's beauty through the mirror.

"You see? You're genuinely beautiful... I think I finally found my muse." The actress was flattered by the compliments and that reflected in her smile when Charles took a blue box, but this was not a simple blue box. This is the famous Tiffany Blue Box. "I want you to meet my new creation..." He opened the box, stealing Y/N's breath instantly. "Dramatically plunging down the decolletage, an incredible emerald-cut bicolor zoisite that shifts from violet-blue to purplish-red, depending on the angle. The pendant is over 48 carats and it's wrapped in a halo of baguette diamonds and suspended from a diamond rondelle chain of over 37 total carats."

"Oh Charles, this is absolutely beautiful. I'm speechless..." She confessed, watching him take the necklace and offer to put it around her neck. Y/N accepted immediately and when the pendant touched the white fabric of the dress, she smiled at the mirror.

"Diamonds are a girl's best friend" Charles whispered, eliciting a giggle from her. "Now I need to speak to the photographer, but take a few minutes to prepare yourself." The man smiled one last time and Y/N walked to the door, opening it for him. She took the opportunity to spy on what was happening on the other side and it was possible to say that there was a little sadness in her eyes.

"What are you looking for?" Misty's voice echoed and she closed the door quickly.

"Huh... nothing!"

The woman was checking the contract – something about image authorization – and when she took her eyes off the papers, she found Y/N with a half-hearted smile.

"Go ahead... Spill the tea."

Brian was probably smoking, so Misty was her only option.

"Arthur was busy these days, but he called me this morning... He looked nervous and said he would like to talk to me, so I invited him to accompany the photoshoot, but..."

"You did what?!" Misty left the chair, interrupting her. Not wanting to start a scene, the redhead looked at Dariela, the makeup artist, and said: "Get out." The woman immediately stopped organizing her makeup and ran out of the dressing room.

"Was that necessary?" Y/N asked, crossing her arms.

"And was it necessary to invite that maniac to come here too?"

"Jesus, Misty!" She walked to the other side of the dressing room. "Manic? Really?"

"I'm just telling the truth."

"Based on what? His bank account?"

"Based on his journal." Misty replied and the actress looked in her direction with a frown. Shaking her head, the redhead let out a bitter laugh before confessing: "He doesn't use it just to write jokes... I found a lot of pornography on those pages."

Y/N felt a little uncomfortable with that. Certain things do not need to be exposed... She didn't need to know about that part of Arthur's life and Misty just invaded his privacy.

"Well... many men consume pornography daily."

"Y/N, pornography is not the point here. He makes some weird collages... women with cat heads... skulls... one of these women was tied up in a compromising position... Can you see how problematic this is?" Misty was trying to open her eyes and consequently was scaring the actress, but that was not all. "I saw the magazines. That man will probably do the same to you... your face on the body of these naked women or on a cat's body! You have always been uncomfortable with the way men see you only as a sex symbol... and now Arthur is using you as a sex toy!"

"Stop! Just stop, okay?" Y/N demanded, using an edgy tone of voice. That was too much for her to assimilate. "You're saying this because you do not accept the idea of ​​Arthur being my friend! All that matters to you is status, but it doesn't matter to me! When are you going to let me live my own life?"

"This is not about social classes, this man is a pervert! I'm trying to protect you!"

"Enough, Misty!" That was enough to make the redhead shut up and Y/N found her way back to the mirror.

To complete the look, inside the blue box was a beautiful diamond ring and a pair of shiny round diamond earrings, just waiting for her. Putting on the ring was an easy task, but she couldn’t say the same about earrings; her hands were shaking and this is all the fault of the stress.

"Let me help you." The manager approached and at first Y/N refused her help, but after another failed attempt, she handed the earrings to the woman. "I know I can be a bitch sometimes..."

"Sometimes?"

Misty just sighed, shaking her head.

~~~~~~~▪~~~~~~~~~▪~~~~~~~~~▪~~~~~~~~~~

a/n – likes and reblogs are appreciated but honestly I’d love to know what you all think of this one. really hope you enjoy it and thank you soooo much for reading ♡

[catzula]

Kiss me so you won’t forget

》 35 An awkward kiss given after a first date. / Kuroo Tetsurou

Synopsis: 6 year old you sealed your promise with Kuroo with a kiss (on the cheek, but its still a kiss... right?) A promise that you would remember and wait each other until Kuroo could buy you a ring. You still remember, but does he?

Even though you weren't exactly best friends, you knew who Kuroo Tetsurou was, and really, who didn't? He was the captain of the volleyball team, one of the most handsome guy around, so smart and so cool, and also your first kiss.

Okay, okay, maybe not your first kiss- it was a small peck on the cheek, but you still counted it. You remembered the day it happened, you and he were playing in the playground, and even though you had just met that day, you felt like you knew each other forever.

He had told you he was going to marry you at the end of the day, and you still remembered the proud smirk on his lips as he promised you, his warm -and dirty- hand holding yours, those odd, golden eyes sparkling. "Just wait," he had told you, "wait till I can buy a ring." You nodded, trying to hide your joy from him.

"Promise me you won't forget me, 'kay?" He told you with a serious face.

"Okay." You had muttered, fidgeting your hands.

"And if I see any other boy here playing with you, I- I-" when he couldn't think of any threats, he held your other hand too, now holding both your hands, looking deep into your eyes. "I'll be really sad."

At that, you had smiled sweetly, without thinking much about it, you leaned in, and your lips touched his chubby cheeks. "I won't forget," you giggled, a kiss worth a promise. "But you have to promise you won't forget either."

And here you were, still remembering the day as clear as day, knowing it was a childish game, but still waiting. You had never forgotten about him, even though you hadn't seen him ever again, not until the first day of college, anyway.

A freshman, standing in the middle of the almost empty room, looking around like a fish out of water. You had no idea where your class was, and it didn't help to know your first ever lesson was Chemistry, your arch-nemesis. You thought of asking help from the people around you, but they all looked too mean for you, like they all were watching and snickering at you. Well, it was an exaggeration, they didn't really care about your presence there, and although some were laughing at the fish-out-of-water expression you had on your face, it was because you reminded them of their first day. 

Still, even though the paranoia you felt wasn't rational, it was there. So asking just anyone was out of the question. Chewing on your inner lip, you walked out to the hallway, hoping you could at least find a teacher so you could ask where the fuck the chemistry lab was. But instead of going to the d-block as you should've, you found yourself out in the garden. 

"Oh my god," you muttered to yourself, rubbing your temples as you looked around, this time even gathering to courage to go and as someone. That was when you saw a head of dyed blond hair bending over the game console in his hands, looking very uncomfortable as he sat on the very edge of the bench.

You didn't want to, but you found yourself walking towards the blond, his eyes never once leaving the screen, his fingers moving smoothly over the buttons.

"E- excuse me?" You muttered when you stood there a few seconds, and he didn't notice you. He visibly flinched at your voice, averting his eyes to you. "I'm, uh, I'm a freshman." You told him as if that explained everything. When he didn't answer, you cleared your throat. "I'm looking for the chemistry lab? I'm very late, and-"

"Kenma." You heard someone call from right behind you, the voice sending chills down your arms for an unexplainable reason. You turned around on your heels to see just who it was. He stood a few steps away from you, brows slightly furrowed as his golden eyes studied your face. Golden eyes that were too familiar. It didn't take you long to recognize who it was, the unruly, raven hair of his being the biggest hint. 

(You were a bit surprised he kept the hair though, because really, what even is that?)

Your lips parted, letting out a small gasp as you recognized, connecting the memory from so long ago with the tall boy that stood before you. The way his eyes examined your face, he probably thought he had seen you before, and you waited for him to remember, heart pounding in your chest because finally-

"I've been looking for you all around." He spoke softly, voice laced with concern, and your eyes widened, gaping at him because his words could only mean that he remembered, he really remembered. 

It took you a few seconds to realize he hadn't. His eyes weren't on you anymore, but on the small boy that slouched over his game. Kenma, ever the perceptive boy, noticed the slight slump of your shoulders, the disappointment that flashed in your eyes.

"I was here." Kenma shrugged, his eyes once again finding his game console. "Could you help her, though? She's lost, apparently, and I'm about to face the boss." 

"Oh, sure." He shrugged, a grin suddenly appearing on his lips, eyes slightly narrowing in a flirtatious manner. "Freshman, huh?" 

"That obvious?" You muttered, forcing a nervous laugh, and he chuckled. "Yeah." 

~~~

The walk felt like an hour. You quickly noticed Kuroo was pretty popular by the looks and whispers that followed you both, and frankly, this was not the first impression you wished to give. 

You anxiously fidgeted your hands, your gaze on your steps as he talked about... something.(what was he talking about again? You had forgotten to listen.)

"And, this is the chemistry lab." He told you, stopping suddenly and causing you to fall off balance. "Woah, careful." He grinned, holding you by the wrist before you fell flat on your face.

"Thanks." You told him with a giggle, biting your lip when you looked at the time. "The class is literally over in 10 minutes." You sighed. "I'll just skip it."

"Wow, rebellious, are we? And skipping chemistry? You must be out of your mind." He teased, chuckling. You shrugged, smiling back. "I don't really like chemistry anyway."

"I'll pretend I didn't hear that." He frowned, "come on, there are benches right around the corner so we can sit."

"Oh, it's okay, and you probably have classes anyway. Thank you so much for helping me, though." You told him with a smile, feeling bad for parting since he was fun to be around, but you didn't want him to feel like a babysitter. 

"My next class is also in this block, don't worry about it. What's your next class? We don't want you to get lost again, you know?" He grinned, making heat rush to your face. "It's math... I think." You answered as you followed him to the bench. 

"Here you go." He told you when he came back from the automat, a can of coffee in his hand. "The coffee tastes like shit, but it still does the job." He kept talking as he opened the can, making a face as he downed the coffee. 

"Oh, shit." You coughed after you took a sip, making him laugh, the rich voice making you shiver. "I told you." 

You sat there until the next lesson, the conversation never-ending, full of laughs, and it felt like that first day you had met. It felt like you knew each other all your lives, like you hadn't only met that day. Still, you neatly avoided ever talking about how you had met before -or that he had proposed to you-. It did kind of sting that he didn't remember when you hadn't forgotten all these years, but it was okay. You were kids, after all.

"You know, this was nice." He told you when you stood up to go back to your class, running one hand through his hair, he looked... nervous?

"It was, thank you for your help." You told him. "And the very bad coffee, too." You added, once again making him laugh. "It's a pleasure." 

He bit on his lip, his eyes locked to yours as if he wanted to say something but couldn't. Or maybe it was... Did he finally remember?

"Would you like me to walk you to the class? Do you remember the directions?" 

"It's okay, I remember." You chuckled, missing the letdown look in his eyes. "Oh, okay." He muttered. 

Oh. 

You turned around to walk to class, stopping mid-track when you heard him call your name. "Yes, Kuroo-kun?" You asked sweetly when he didn't say anything for a few seconds. 

"I was thinking..." He muttered. "I can... you know, give you my number." He scratched the back of his neck anxiously. "So I can help if you ever get lost." He added when you didn't answer (you were still trying to process that he offered you his number?!)

"Oh, that would be amazing!" You told him a bit too excitedly. "Th- that's really sweet, thank you." You tried to suppress your grin as he entered his number into your phone. 

"You can always text me." He told you with a fake chough that was meant to hide his embarrassment. "Not only when- I mean if you get lost, but also if you ever need any help. Or just anything, really." He chuckled when he noticed your flushed stare. 

"You should probably go now," he told you. "You class is about to start." 

"Oh, shit!" You muttered, starting to run as you realized he was right. 

~~~

"Oh, hey Kenma!" You greeted your friend when he walked towards you. You were glad he had relaxed around you, feeling safe when it was just you two. 

"Hey, Y/N." He greeted back quietly. "Waiting for Kuroo?"

You nodded with a shy smile, averting your eyes from his golden ones to your hands. "He should be here any minute now."

"I doubt it." Kenma shrugged. "He was trying to shape his hair last time I saw him. He has been working on it ever since." He snickered villainously. "And that was 3 hours ago." 

You couldn't help but laugh at that, the image of Kuroo's frustrated face as he tried to rule his hair somewhat, making your shoulders shake with laughter. 

"What are you laughing at?" You heard someone talk from right behind you and making you jump in your place. "N-nothing!" You answered instantly when you recognized him. 

"I thought you were going to fix your hair." Kenma muttered, his words causing Kuroo's face to twist with shock, anger, and disappointment. 

"I did fix my hair!"

~~~

A date with Kuroo Tetsurou. 

You always imagined it would be amazing, but not this good. It was unfair how funny he was, how smart and good-looking. It was always enjoyable to be around him, but having his full attention on you, like this, romantically, was something else. 

It hadn't taken long after that second first time you had met for him to ask you out. You were hanging out almost every day anyway, he usually accompanied you to your classes, sometimes even waiting for you. 

So here you were. Kuroo had decided to go on a picnic for your first date, brought cookies and sandwiches and this time decent coffee, even fruits, and at least 20 bananas? You didn't ask him about the bananas, though.

You had been sitting there, on the top of the hill, for hours now. The sun had already set, stars showing up in the sky, but neither of you wanted to part. 

Kuroo was leaning on a tree, his arm slumped on your shoulder, pulling you towards his chest. It didn't feel awkward or odd to be in this position with him, but you weren't sure why (or how). You skid closer to him, dropping your head on his shoulder, aware of the grin on his lips when you didn't push him back. 

You sat like that for god knows how long, only deciding to go back when he noticed you were about to fall asleep between his arms. The ride back to your house was silent, the comforting kind that made you both smile. It was dark, the lights coming from the traffic every once in a while illuminating your pretty face, causing him to think this was yet another dream. He had no idea how he managed to make you fall for him, too, but Kuroo was grateful he did.

He tapped your shoulder slightly when you arrived, waking you up from your daze. "Y/N." He muttered, smiling. "We're here."

"Oh, I'm sorry, I think I fell asleep." You answered with a cheeky smile. "So I thought." He chuckled. "So, uh, thank you for today." He told you, rubbing the back of his neck and causing you to scream internally at how adorable he was. 

"It was really nice." He kept on awkwardly when you stood silent and fiddled your fingers with your now unfastened seatbelt.

"I had so much fun, too." You answered, biting your lips as you thought of what to say next, but he acted before you.

"By the way, Y/N, you know this was a date, right?" He suddenly asked, the question leaving you dumbfounded. When you didn't answer him for a few seconds, he felt his eyes widening. "Y/N- are you seriosuly-"

"Kuroo, what the hell?" You asked, unable to control your laughter anymore. "Of course I knew this was a date!"

"Ah, damn, my heart almost stopped." He clutched his chest, only making your laughter louder. "Why would you even ask that?"

"Oh, I just... wanted to confirm it so I could tell you something." He muttered, not proceeding whatsoever. "And that is?.." You persuaded him, making him chuckle and lean forward to bring his face closer to yours. "I wanted to tell you that- that I like you. A lot." He finally admitted.

"I like you, too." You whispered, suddenly aware of how close his lips were.

"And I really, really want to kiss you." 

"I'm not- I'm not stopping you." You confessed, making him chuckle just before his lips touched your lips. It was a small peck, his soft lips pressing yours slightly, his touch on your lips lingering a few seconds before he pulled back. 

"I think-" He whispered, slightly breathless because of the excitement and the way his heart pounded in his heart. "I've fallen for you hard." He chuckled. "I'm not- Umm, I'm sorry our first kiss wasn't in somewhere more romantic, though." Kuroo told you, and you could see the slight disappointment in his eyes. 

You bit your lip (the feeling of his lips still lingered on yours), chuckling anxiously. "You know, this wasn't exactly our first kiss." You shrugged.

"What?"

"I, umm, I did kiss you on the cheek before. To seal... a promise."

His brows furrowed, trying to understand what you were talking about, confusion evident in his eyes. "No, you didn't." 

"Kuroo," you told him with a mysterious smile. "I did." 

You opened the car door, knowing by the slight widening of his eyes, he was an eyelash away from remembering. "Well, good night." You smiled, enjoying the look of shock in his eyes. 

You shut the door just as he shouted your name, "Y/N, wait, I remember!"

~~~

Even though you weren't mad at him for forgetting, Kuroo still made up for it with thousands and thousands of more kisses.

[aestheticallyholland]

NEVER NOT | AFTER YEARS . . .

❃ PAIRING tom holland x fem!reader

❃ DISCLAIMER i do not own the artists (and the reader) that are going to portray the characters, but i do own some of the their names. the plot of the story is inspired to the book and movie 'to all the boys i've loved before' but with changes. the gifs and photos used in this series are edited by me but i get credits to the originals. also, this series is first posted in wattpad by me. PLEASE DO NOT REPOST IT SOMEWHERE ELSE !

❃ WORD COUNT 2.8k words

❃ AUTHOR'S NOTES you have reached the final chapter of my tom holland series, never not! for those who have reached this part, i would like to say thank you so much for taking your time to read this cliche story that i wrote originally on wattpad, and hopefully, you enjoyed and loved it. thank you also for the constant reblogs and likes for each chapter in this series. i truly appreciate every reblog and like you gave. i also hope that you are satisfied with the ending of this series. with lots of love, lei <3

NEVER NOT MASTERPOST | LEI'S LIBRARY

"All love stories are tales of beginnings. When we talk about falling in love, we go to the beginning, to pinpoint the moment of freefall." - Meghan O'Rourke

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

"ONE MORE POSE FOR ME!"

Flash.

"And another one!"

Flash.

"Alright!" Y/N exclaimed and removed her Canon 90D DSLR camera from her right eye. "That's it for today, guys! Great job everyone!" shouted once more and looked at the photos that she took from the monitor of the computer.

She was doing a photoshoot for one of the famous magazine companies, The Hollywood Reporter. She was one of the photographers for the magazine company for almost a year already. She surely was so happy to receive a call way back a year ago before that she was hired. And, she surely was so happy to pursue what she dreamed of.

"Great shots, Y/N. Great as always." Someone said from behind her and Y/N could just smile at the compliment.

"Thank you, Millie." She said and looked at Camille. Camille became a fashion designer like how she always wanted to be. She worked alongside Y/N in several photoshoots just this year, coincidentally.

"Want to grab some coffee on the way home?" Camille asked as she prepared her purse and placed it on her shoulder.

"Sure," Y/N said and got the hard drive that was plugged into the computer since all of the photos were there. Not only was she a photographer but also one of the editors for the magazines. "But after that, I gotta go somewhere."

"Are you gonna go to that place again?" Camille asked and Y/N looked at her and nodded as an answer. They walked out together as they were the only people left there.

"I'll probably call Erika after you go. Just gonna remind her about the reunion that our family had planned for this weekend." Camille said while walking beside Y/N.

"But she'll probably be with Harrison right now," Y/N said.

"They're still together all these years? Never knew she was a relationship person honestly." Camille said.

"Me either. But, she's happy so I'm happy for her." Y/N said.

They entered the coffeehouse that was packed with busy people. The scent of coffee went to their noses as soon as they got in.

"I totally forgot that it's still Friday today," Camille said. "So many people."

They lined up in the long line since there was only one cashier available.

"By the way, have you seen the latest movie?" Camille asked Y/N and she gave a confused look.

"Which one?" Y/N asked back.

"I think it was the— erm— The latest Spiderman movie. I don't know the full title but I heard they just released a new one this month." Camille said. "Tom is in it right?"

Tom.

That name that Y/N will never forget.

Y/N smiled under her breath before answering her. "Yeah, I guess."

After that, they just waited for the line to be shorter and shorter until they were the next one to order. After they ordered, they stood in the corner waiting for their coffee to be made.

"One cappuccino and latte for Y/N!"

"I'll get it," Camille said and walked fast to get their orders. She mouthed thank you to the lady and went to Y/N's side again. "Here's your cappuccino," Camille said and handed Y/N her drink as they made their way out of the coffeehouse.

"So, I'll see you on Monday at work?" Camille asked.

"Always." That was what Y/N answered. "Take care!" She added before waving goodbye to Camille and went in the opposite direction as her with her drink in her hand.

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Y/N parked her car on the side of the empty road. After how many months, almost a year, of driving lessons, she could finally drive for herself.

Before she got out, she got her drink and her other things first and removed her coat. She got out of the car with her things and shut the door and locked it.

The wind suddenly blew her hair and she smiled at this great feeling. As she walked towards the sand, she took off her shoes and placed them in the same spot that she would sit on. Luckily, no one was in the place other than herself.

The sun was almost setting and the waves were still moving in the ocean. She had come to this place almost every day or at least most of the time. The light of the sun reflected on the sun symbol on her bracelet that he gave her a few years back. She sighed at the thought of him.

She had lost contact with him just almost a year ago because of his busy schedule but Harrison would be the one to tell her how Tom was doing and all. Well, not really lost contact but they rarely contacted each other for the past few months due to their work.

Although those had happened, she never stopped going back to this place that Tom wanted her to always go. This was the place that kept her alive and stress-free.

Their relationship had its ups and downs.

Tom became one of the most famous celebrities in the world ever since he got the role of being Spiderman. After that, he had more upcoming movies for the past years later on.

Although there may have been rumors about him being in a relationship with one of his co-stars, Zendaya, because of their roles in Spider-Man, her trust for him remain. Although at some point, it hurt her but that just passed away.

Overall, she was happy for him and for what he has achieved. She was so proud of what he had become. It didn't stop her from visiting his family's house and spending time with them.

"I wish you were here right now." She whispered to herself as the wind could not stop making her hair fly.

"And I'm here." A voice said from a distance but loud enough for her to hear. Her eyes widen at this very familiar voice and her eyes began to water.

She slowly looked in the direction of the voice that she heard and there stood the person that she has been waiting for.

He gave her the same smile that she would never forget. He still looked the same as before but he was more muscular now. He looked better in person than on the big screen or in his interviews. His brown hair is now shorter but still had curls on.

"Tom?" She whispered and he could just easily read her lips calling his name. He opened his arms widely for her. She then ran up to his open arms and did not think twice about wrapping her arms around him. He spun her around as soon as he closed his arms around her.

Her tears fell from her eyes while hugging him. When Tom heard her sob, he placed a hand on her head and stroked her hair. "I'm home, love." He whispered to her.

She pulled away for a while and admired him. His face features, his hair. Everything about him. She suddenly pinched his cheeks with both of her hands that surprised Tom.

"Ow! What was that for?" He asked as he felt the slight pain from the pinch. His voice is deeper than before and his British accent is kind of mixed with an American accent.

"You are real," Y/N said that made Tom chuckle.

She was still as adorable as always. Tom thought

"Of course I am. You thought you're hallucinating?" Tom asked her and she nodded.

"It's been so long to finally see you personally," Y/N said and she slapped him on the chest. "You kept me waiting you know!"

"I'm sorry, love." Tom apologized and kissed her forehead. "Four years, huh?"

"And three months," Y/N added while looking at him and grinned.

"You have been counting," Tom said that made Y/N nod. "I missed you so much." He said and pulled her for a hug again. "God, I do miss you."

"I missed you too, Thomas." She replied and noticed the scrunchie that was on his wrist. The same scrunchie that she gave him before. "You kept it." She said and held to his wrist where the scrunchie was and smiled at him.

"Of course. It really reminded me of you." He answered.

They decided to sit down and talked about each other's new life. Tom was surprised about Y/N's career since he never thought she would be into photography like his brother, Harry.

"Your mom really influenced me to go to that," Y/N said. "That's why I'm so grateful for her."

"I had a photoshoot in that company actually," Tom said and that made her eyes widen. "Really?" She asked.

"Yeah, but that was like two thousand seventeen or something." He answered.

"Your American accent is really showing up," Y/N said and smiled at him.

"Well, most of my roles required this accent which I'm good at, surprisingly." He answered.

"How long have you been here already?" She asked him, curiously.

"Just today. I told my family first and Harrison that I was coming back for a week's vacation. And, I wanted to surprise you." He answered and placed his arms around her shoulders. She placed her head on his shoulder and gave a relieved sigh. Her happiness cannot be measured right now.

"You wanna go to the water?" Tom said and Y/N suddenly ran away from him and giggled.

"If you could catch me first!" Y/N said and ran which made Tom scoffed a laugh.

"I will!" Tom said and chased after her. After a few seconds of running, Tom was a few inches away from her and scooped her legs and carried her bridal style and he walked towards the water.

"No! Put me down! The water is gonna be so cold!" Y/N said but Tom ignored her and laughed. Then, Y/N wrapped her arms around his neck and forcefully pushed both of them down together to the water.

"Holy shit, the water is so cold," Y/N said as she raised her head up from the water as well as Tom. "Damn you, Holland!"

"You're gonna pay for that," Tom said and splashed her with water and Y/N did the same. Basically, the couple had a water fight. They kept laughing and splashing on the water to each other even as they stood up.

Tom then grabbed Y/N's arm and pulled her closer to him. They both wrapped their arms around each other and Y/N just gave a light laugh.

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

"Do you have a towel in your car?" Tom asked as they got out of the water, their bodies and clothes soaking wet as they stayed there a while ago to watch the sunset.

"Yep. It's on the back. I came prepared." Y/N said as she gave Tom the keys and walked towards her car. Tom could just laugh.

Tom got the towel and wrapped it around Y/N's body and continued to hug her from behind. They decided to stay on the beach a little longer until they dried up. After a few minutes, they then went inside the car with Tom as a driver although Y/N insisted that she would drive.

They went directly to Y/N's apartment that she rented ever since she got her work. Tom parked in the basement of the building. As soon as they got out, Tom locked the cars and gave Y/N back her keys. They walked together and got to an elevator going to her apartment.

"How's your dad and Aria?" Tom asked as Y/N shoved the key on the doorknob.

"They are doing great actually," Y/N answered. "Aria got a job in New Zealand in tourism. And, will you believe that my dad actually got married a year ago?" Y/N said happily and opened the door.

"Really? I never heard of that." Tom said.

"Because we made it a private wedding so it's only our relatives and Mom Trina's family too," Y/N explained to Tom. "Mom Trina is an amazing woman and I'm glad they got to meet each other."

"Your mom will be happy that your dad is happy," Tom said and Y/N could only smile.

She placed her things down the counter table. "This is my home." She said to Tom who was looking everywhere in the apartment. "It's not that bad." He said.

"Yep. In my room, I get to see the city and the sunset and sunrise too." While Y/N was talking. Tom just kept staring at her, admiring her. He couldn't explain how happy he felt when he finally saw her again. He walked closer to her and wrapped his arms around her from behind. This startled Y/N a bit but she held his arms and leaned her back to his chest.

"How did I get so lucky to have you?" Tom whispered and moved her hair away and gave a peck on her neck.

"Destiny, I guess." She answered and turned around to face him. She saw him looked at her lips and decided to close the gap between them by pressing her lips to his. Tom responded to the kiss and pulled her closer to him. As soon as the kiss became heated, she jumped and wrapped her legs around Tom's waist and he was carrying her. He then walked towards her room and shut the room by kicking his foot at the door while kissing and carrying her.

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

The ray of light hit Y/N's eyes as soon as she woke up. She felt strong arms around her bare waist and she smiled. She yawned and stretched her legs before she tried to move Tom's arm around her. She could still hear his soft snores beside her. His curls are really showing off when his head was on the pillow. She tried to get up but was stopped when she felt a hand grabbing her wrist and pulling her back to the bed. Strong arms wrapped around her again but this time tighter.

"Tom!" She exclaimed.

"Don't leave me here," Tom mumbled while his eyes were still closed and snuggled his head to her neck which tickled a little.

"Alright, baby," Y/N said and snuggled back at him. "But I have to cook breakfast. It's like almost lunch already."

"That was a long long night." Tom teased and Y/N felt her cheeks heat up as she remembered what happened last night. She slapped Tom's arm playfully who just laughed at her. "Let's do it again," Tom whispered in her ear with a husky voice and attempted to kiss her again but Y/N covered his mouth with her hand.

"Nope, nope. Not happening." Y/N said as she shoved his arms away from her and stood up with the blanket wrapped around her. "You better go and shower, Holland!" She exclaimed as she exited her room.

"Join me, then!"

"Shut it, Thomas!"

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

"Alright, we're on our way now, mum," Tom said through his phone as he drove in the road. "Love you too. Bye." He ended the call and placed his phone down. His eyes focusing on the road.

"What did she say?" Y/N asked.

"Harrison and Erika are already there and there done preparing." He answered and she just nodded as an answer. He glanced at her and smiled, taking her nearest hand and intertwining their fingers together. Y/N looked at him and smiled back. Tom decided to stop driving for a while which made Y/N confused. He parked the car on the side of the road.

"What's wrong?" Y/N asked, concerned.

"I just..." Tom paused for a while. "I'm just so happy that I got to see you again," Tom said and looked at her deep in her eyes.

Y/N placed a hand on his cheek and smiled. "Me too, Tom." She said.

"I'll take you with me once my vacation is over," Tom said and her eyes widen.

"But I have work—"

"I already talked to your manager and he's fine with it. He's gonna give you a break for a while." Tom said.

"How is that even possible?" She asked and giggled.

"Secret," Tom said and grinned. "I want you to see my work and some of the co-stars want to meet you."

"Seriously?" Y/N asked. "You talked about me to them?"

"Yep." Tom answered, emphasizing the 'p'. "Even the Avenger cast wants to meet you."

"Alright, then. I'll get to see celebrities." Y/N squealed and smiled at him. "At least I get to see my boyfriend work. This is exciting."

Tom placed a hand on her nape and pulled her head closer for him to kiss your forehead and lips.

"I love you, my love." He said. "You are my world and my everything."

Oh, how lucky they were for each other.

"I love you, too, Tom."

Always.

Forever.

Fin.

❝ WE WERE SO BEAUTIFUL

WE WERE SO TRAGIC

NO OTHER MAGIC

COULD EVER COMPARE ❞

❃ ANOTHER AUTHOR'S NOTE to add, feel free to also comment or reblog how this series was. i would lovre to read your thoughts and feelings about this series. once again, thank you for reading NEVER NOT, by yours truly 🦋

❃ TAGLIST @allthisfortommy @kait4073 @lovebittenbyevans @l0ve-0f-my-life @spiitfiires @robertpattinson-th @jackiehollanderr @butterflies-glitter