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crash-hawk · 3 years ago

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Life on the line, winner take all, ready or not, let’s begin...

In honor of the one-year anniversary of Third Life (hi!!! I’m not okay!!!), have a Tumblr re-release of what I consider to be one of the finest one-shots I have ever written for any fandom.

(Inspired by thcscus’s Aerie series, this fic is part of the Kaleidoscope AU, and can be read totally blind/as a standalone. That said, I highly recommend checking out the rest of the series! My co-authors are extremely cool and epic.) AO3 link can be found HERE for those who prefer!

Three

If you come inside, things will not be the same

When you return to the light

And if you think you’ve won, you never saw me change

The game that we have been playing…

- Chris Cornell , “You Know My Name” ---------------------------------------------------------------

“So what do you do?” asks the young girl with the flower braided into her rust-red hair.

There are twenty or more of them gathered around the huge campfire that’s been set up on the beach--not everyone who calls the island village their home, but a goodly number of them, ranging the entire gamut from masters and journeymen to the greenest of the new apprentices. The young girl who’d spoken up is one of the latter, a bright-eyed young thing who’d come to learn architecture and botany, and who watches the two guests who’ve come to join their nightly get-together with eager curiosity.

The guest in question doesn’t appear to really hear her, looking over his shoulder back toward the lights of the village. “Where in the hell did George get off to?” he wonders, a trifle irritably.

“He’s still off with Pearl, I think,” answers one of the others, smiling. “Relax. He’s not going to vanish or be eaten by monsters or fall off a cliff, not around here, I promise.”

Of all of them, he has been here the longest, long enough to remember when the island was nothing but empty plains and gnarled cypress trees and the occasional massive old oak. They had been three when they’d first come, much like these three who’ve come to visit today, laughing as they’d sized up their new refuge and laid the foundations of their first homes. One is gone, now, old age having claimed him decades ago, but pieces of his spirit are still scattered about the village: the great snarling beast of a tree, meant as a prank, that he’d loved so much he’d made a home of it; the wind-powered music machines that still play to this day; the old underground farm that still produces far too many potatoes for the village to eat, even at full capacity, but that no one has the heart or the inclination to replant with something else.

His wings are tucked safely out of sight tonight, out of an abundance of caution, although he’s certain his guests know they’re there. He knows well enough what his guests are, and vice versa--but while he trusts Pearl’s quiet, gentle spirit-brother, god of the green places, so much like his old friend that his heart aches, he is not so certain about the other two.

“Oh, yes, he’s perfectly safe,” chimes another from beside him. “Pearl’s night vision is a-mayzin’, she’ll spot any dangers a mile away, and I’m sure Grian’s cleaned up all of the traps...you did clean up all of the traps before company came over, right?”

“Traps?” queries one of the guests, eyebrows arching high over eyes as black as his hair.

“Shut it,” Grian hisses, elbowing his oldest friend so hard in the ribs that he doubles over, laughing and coughing at the same time. “Don’t listen to him. There are no traps. Why would there be traps? We absolutely, positively do not build, lay, or arm traps anywhere in this village. In fact, trap-laying is punishable by summary banishment. It’s in the village charter.”

That gets everyone laughing, residents and guests alike, and Grian relaxes a little. He’s being paranoid, he knows, but he can’t help it. It’s rare enough that visitors ever find their way to their place of safety...never mind visitors like these.

“I think the young lady was asking you a question,” says another of the trade masters, a genial man in black and gold with unruly reddish-brown hair who sits right beside the newcomers, tinkering with what appears to be an ornate clock. Much like said newcomers and a few of his fellow villagers, his youthful face belies his true nature.

“Hm? Oh, you mean me?” asks the first of the two guests, the one who’d introduced himself earlier as Dream.

The red-haired girl smiles, nodding. “It wasn’t terribly important. I was just asking what you do.”

Dream smiles, shrugging a little. “Oh, nothing very impressive. Nothing like you all do here. This place is really something else.”

Grian’s friend grins, twisting the old scars marring one side of his face. “Flattery will get you everywhere, good sir.”

That earns a snort and an eyeroll from Dream’s black-haired companion. “He’s fishing. His ego is the size of that bloody huge pile of rocks over there. Why the hell is there a bloody huge pile of rocks over there, by the way? I’ve seen castles that were smaller.”

“Are you insulting my bloody huge pile of rocks, Sir...Sapnap, wasn’t it?” Scar rumbles, mock-threateningly.

“Wouldn’t dream of it, and don’t call me Sir,” Sapnap retorts.

“Did you build any of these?” Dream asks, still smiling at the redheaded girl. Grian feels oddly disquieted, seeing that smile, but he keeps it off of his face. Gods are proud, prickly creatures--he ought to know--and their village holds guest right sacred. He won’t insult them.

“Oh, no,” she denies with a giggle. “I’ve only just got here. But I’m designing a greenhouse. As soon as Pearl approves of my blueprints, I’m going to start building it. I’m Gem, by the way.”

“A lovely name. Anyway, to answer your question, Gem, I write stories.”

“Yeah?” queries a wide-eyed, dark-skinned young man in a fuzzy green wool tunic, absently handing tools to the one working on the clock without bothering to look at them. “Any good ones?”

“Well, I don’t know about good,” Dream demurs, holding up his hands. “I’ve written a lot of them, though, so one or two are bound to be, statistically speaking.”

“Oh, for fuck’s sake,” Sapnap mutters, annoyed. “There are cathedral windows less transparent than you. Tell the children a bedtime story and be done with it. I’m going to go see if there’s anything worth hunting around here.” He gets up, shaking sand out of his white cloak, and stalks off down the beach toward the nearest clump of trees.

Grian and Scar exchange glances, nonplussed, but Dream simply waves it off. “Don’t pay any attention to him. He has a short attention span and gets cranky when he’s bored.” He smiles again, glancing around the fire before his gaze comes to rest squarely on the two of them. “That being said... would you like to hear one? I promise it’ll be a good one.”

The villagers all voice their enthusiastic assent, and Scar shrugs. “Sure, why the hell not.”

“Well...as long as it’s not a long one,” Grian acquiesces, not knowing why he feels so uneasy at the idea. “It’s getting on midnight.”

“That’s the best time for stories,” Dream suggests with a grin. “But don’t worry, it’s not a long one. I’ll be done well before the moon touches the water, you have my word.”

“Alright, then,” Grian says, summoning a smile of his own and lowering himself to sit down cross-legged on the sand beside the others. “Lay it on us. And if Scar interrupts, you have my permission to throw rocks at him.”

“I,” Scar protests archly, “would never.”

“He would,” Impulse whispers theatrically in Dream’s ear.

Dream laughs. “Don’t worry, I’m not overly concerned about that. Besides, I think you’ll like this one. I think you’ll like it just fine.”

A sudden gust of wind whips through, sending sparks spiraling up toward the stars, and Grian tells himself that it’s only the chill that it brings with it that makes him shiver.

Only that, and nothing more. -----------------------------------------------------------------------

“In the beginning,” Dream starts, “There was nothing but nothing. A great Void, timeless and lightless and endless. And then there was a flash, and nothing became something. And that something resolved itself into everything, into dust and stars and light and worlds...and stories. The stories were here first, but they needed people to tell them. And so the gods were formed.

“The gods all had their own stories that they presided over, their own domains. Each had their part to play, working together in harmony. But stories aren’t much good without an audience, either, and so mortals came next. Their lives were short, trifling things, but they devoured the stories the gods told and passed them along, and together with the gods they created whole worlds.

“But the Universe had made a mistake: in creating the gods to write and to tell the stories, and the mortals to listen and pass them along, it had given them the freedom to do with them what they would. The harmony began to fall apart. Gods decided they weren’t satisfied with their own domains and looked to others. The humans defied the gods and claimed that they should have control of their own stories, as if the stories were ever theirs to begin with. They fell to squabbling, and war and chaos and tragedy followed, so much that they became the rule of the world. And the God of Stories watched it all, and grew angry.

“Some particularly defiant gods caught his eye. The God of the Stars, who abandoned his post to live among the humans, idling away the years in disguise as a king and holding grand tournaments that drew thousands to play and fight in frivolous games. He took up with a mortal lover who caught his eye in one of these tournaments, uncaring that he was setting them both up for heartbreak. The God of Sorcery, who perverted his art to grant immortality to his favorite and sold the secrets of enchantment to any mortal who came to him. The Goddess of Decay and Rot, who thought to create instead.”

Dream pauses, as if for effect, gazing about at his audience, all of whom sit listening rapt, without a single interruption. A slow smile spreads on his face at the sight.

“The God of Stories’ greatest ire was reserved for those who thought themselves above it all, who thought to separate themselves from all the chaos and turmoil of the outside world, as if they themselves weren’t a party to it: the twin Gods of Science and Invention, who taught secrets to the mortals that they were never meant to know; the God of Time and Travel, who helped the mortals find paths that they should never have found, and his friend the God of Calculation, who saw the rules of mass and motion, only to break them in ways the Universe never intended. Worst of all, though, were the two tricksters: the one who cheated his way out from under the Angel of Death again and again and rooked the gullible with promises of commerce, and his constant companion, he who stole fire from the sun and made it his own and granted himself the power of flight, a power the Universe had reserved only for one.”

Grian’s eyes suddenly widen, trance broken, hackles raised. He can feel every feather on his hidden wings lifting, puffing out as if in response to danger. And there is danger here, Grian knows, every instinct screaming...yet he can’t move.

“Together, they and their mortal favorites created their own false world in microcosm, a place they believed was safe, where they could live and create and make their own rules, where they could teach the mortals how to become the authors of their own stories. The God of Stories was very angry when he saw it, and set out to teach them a lesson.”

Grian can feel electricity crawling along his skin, crackling between the barbs of his feathers--his suddenly very visible feathers.

“What are you doing,” he whispers, his voice little more than a husky croak.

Dream blinks. “Telling a story, just as you asked. Just as you all asked.”

With a tremendous effort, Grian manages to turn his head to look at Scar, who sits frozen beside him, eyes round and glassy. Impulse, too, stares back at them from across the fire, still as stone. All of the others’ eyes remain on Dream, transfixed, lost in the tale.

“So the God of Stories came up with a plan: he would weave a world for these renegades, these shirkers and usurpers. A small world, with enchanted glass walls that no god or man could pass. He would set them down in this world, along with those mortals they loved the best, and there they would play a game.”

Dream’s words echo from the waves, vibrating along Grian’s bones. He can feel the world begin to shift and twist around him, the air encircling the captive audience by the campfire shimmering like a mirage. Worse than that is the feeling of being trapped, pinioned, fixed in place when every atom of him is screaming to take to the skies.

“Stop it!!”

“Stop it? Oh, come on, now, we’ve only just gotten to the good part!” Dream grins, his eyes flashing green in the flickering light of the campfire.

“Each of the players in this game would be granted three lives. They would live in their glass box, free to make whatever they could of their little world...and each death, accidental or on purpose, would take a piece of their soul. Each time they came back, they would come back a little less, stripped down closer and closer to base instinct, to kill or be killed. Friendly pranks would turn deadly, alliances would turn into warring factions, lovers would watch one another die and burn the world to avenge them, until only one remained in the end.

“And when that one finally gave in to despair, left alone with the blood of his friends still dripping from his hands, the God of Stories would send them all back to their little haven--but wiser than when they left. They would know that there was no true escape from chaos, that war and turmoil were inevitable as the tides, there was no love that would not end in loss. They would look at their closest friends and know that they were one string’s pull away from tearing each other apart, that bloodlust lies just beneath the surface, waiting for the right motivation. They could continue to build, to invent, to teach their little apprentices, and when the apprentices left to return to the wider world, the creations they brought with them would break armies and bring nations to their knees.”

“You’re wrong…” Scar grates out from beside Grian, and he feels a burst of fierce pride in his friend break through the leaden terror weighting him in place. “You...can’t make us…”

“Oh, I can. I absolutely can. Don’t worry, though, it’s only a story. You’ll wake up and it’ll be like it never happened.” The Green God’s eyes glow brighter, until they’re almost too bright to look at, until they’re all Grian can see. The eyes, and the smile. “Well, almost .”

“...how does it end?” a slurred, drugged voice asks from somewhere Grian can’t move enough to see. Gem, the young apprentice girl, he thinks. “...the game...who wins…?”

There’s a low murmur from around the campfire, a rustling susurration as the others join the chorus, hypnotized children waiting on bated breath for the storyteller to bring their tale to a close.

The Green God cocks his head to the side, as if pondering. “Well, I could write the ending now, I suppose...but the fact is I won’t know until it happens, and it’s so much more fun to watch it unfold unspoiled. After all, what audience doesn’t love a cliffhanger?” I won’t, Grian wants to scream, but the world is dissolving around him, the cold darkness of the Void slipping through his feathers as he falls. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Gods and humans in order of appearance in Dream's tale: Scott Smajor Jimmy Solidarity Rendog Martyn Littlewood ZombieCleo TangoTek ImpulseSV BdoubleO100 EthosLab Scar Grian

#Hermitcraft Season 8 #Dream SMP #Third Life SMP #Passerine #Fanfiction #Kaleidoscope AU #If You Can't Boatem Join 'Em

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woozisnoots · 3 years ago

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hi, it's aeris!! for the ask game, 7, 16, 34, 43! - @ravixen

hi aeris @ravixen !! ✨ hehe tysm for sending these <3 i’m always so late in replying to these but i also think i used too much brain power answering 🫠

[ fic writer ask game! ]

7. do you prefer to read short fics or long fics?

yes i like to read B) LOL but fr i don’t really think i have a preference in length? i will admit though, if it tends to be a bit longer, i take a lot of breaks in between and that happens regardless of how immersed i am in the story 🐋 i don’t like looking at my phone/computer for a long period of time so therefore 😔

16. do you research for your fics? if so, how deep of a rabbit hole have you gone down by accident when researching?

i feel like i’ve experienced so little in the world that i end up researching ever little thing for my aus 😵‍💫 but it’s always the just general idea of things, i don’t usually add the tiny details and kind of let my fantasy run that part of the story. i find that sometimes when i research too much into smth, i lose track of my creativity and what i wanted to accomplish with the original story i planned :/

34. how much of yourself and your life experiences do you put into your writing? what do you think your readers' image of you is?

i don’t think there’s anything i’ve written that doesn’t have a piece of me or my life in it (did i word that write?) 🌱 this may sound so obvious and so cliche but… my stories are my stories, of course there’s going to be some part of me involved when i’m writing. i’m not exposing my diary 🥴 but there’s different aspects of me and my life that make it in my fics that come in different forms! the emotions i write and feelings that my characters go through, indeed i have felt. i probably copy and pasted exact words i heard from a mcdonalds drive thru into one of fics somewhere 🤷‍♀️ all the hyperspecific details in my fics are most likely huge tmi’s in my daily life that u guys probably didn’t need to know 🤪

honestly tho………. i just hope my readers’ image of me is. nice 👍 XCBXNCBXB LIKE. bonus points if you guys think i’m funny <3 but looking back at some of the things i’ve written, i really aim for comfort. so @ my readers, i hope you guys know that i am giving you the biggest warmest hug (achieved thru my writing) 🐘

43. talk about a positive experience with fanfiction or the fanfiction community that you will always remember.

this question makes me so :(( bc i remember when i first started writing and it was so much fun just creating smth and in the end, being so proud of yourself bc damn. i made that! 🌟 and it didn’t matter if it reached a certain audience, it only took a singular person that constantly loved my stories. praising and encouraging me to write more, fueling ideas out of me. that feeling is almost cathartic to me 🌌

beyond that, i have met some of my closest friends now through the fanfic community, readers and writers alike. gosh and when i tell you that these are some of the best friendships i could ever ask for 🥺 💥 literally unmatched. i could say so much abt the people i’ve met here, but i wouldn’t be the same person i am today without the help of some of the people i’ve met here on this platform. ♥️

#💓.asks #i didnt mean for the last answer to be so LONG #and SAPPY 🥲

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jimlingss · 5 years ago

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Sugar and Coffee [19]

Chapter 18 - Chapter 19 - Chapter 20

➜ Words: 4.6k

➜ Genres: 99.5% Fluff, 0.5% Angst, Pâtisserie school!AU

➜ Summary: It isn't hard to be a pâtisserie chef, but it's not a piece of cake either. It seems like for you in particular, life keeps throwing in one wrench after another. It always finds ways to make your sweets bitter. The cherry on top is Jeon Jungkook — a rival with a sensitive sweet tooth who always finds ways to complain about you.

cr.

“You guys are together now?!” There’s a high-pitched, deafening shout that has you flinching. On sheer instinct, you’re about to let go of his hand, but you feel Jungkook’s grip tighten on yours instead, squeezing your palm securely. You glance at him with your brows raised and he merely shrugs. “What? This?” Jungkook lifts your interlaced hands up to your shoulders, showing it off right in front of Taehyung’s face. He teases, “Friends can hold each other’s hands.” “You don’t let me hold your hand when I ask,” Taehyung argues with a scoff. The tall brunette is left utterly confused and soon, Jimin is joining the trio. He greets all of you with a bright smile but almost immediately, his eyes stray downwards to your interlocked hands as well. Yet Jungkook shamelessly maintains it in spite of the obvious attention it's bringing, even to your classmates and acquaintances passing by the hallway. Jimin’s grin widens. “Are you guys datin—” “I already asked.” Taehyung cuts off. “They’re just being weird.” “Oh.” The shorter man’s lips become lopsided with his frown and he sends an incredulous expression to Jungkook that only makes said man laugh. Jimin turns around anyhow. “Yoongi and Hoseok are already in the dining center. Do you guys have any classes today?” “No, I think they’re just doing orientation for the newbies.” “You weren’t this excited to tell your parents,” you lean over to whisper into Jungkook’s ear when the pair of you naturally fall behind the two boys. “Well, they’re my parents. I’d rather spare the both of us from….that,” he explains and then smiles. “But is it such a bad thing if everyone here knows? It’ll stop people from making moves on you.” “Moves on me?” You scoff. If anything, it should be the opposite. Jungkook’s always been popular with everyone without even having to try. But you suppose it would be rather helpful if everyone knew that he was taken. It might just save you from a lot of headaches. So you don’t protest further. Yoongi and Hoseok are easy to find in the dining center. They’re at the usual table and it’s like time hasn’t passed whatsoever. Yoongi is picking at his food and chewing gingerly as if it's exhausting for him to do so while Hoseok is tapping on his phone. They look up when you approach. “Long time, no see.” Hoseok grins as Jimin settles beside him with an equally warm smile. “What are you talking about? The group chat has been blowing up because of this guy.” He hitches his thumb to Taehyung who is wholly offended. “It’s not my fault I want to share the cute dogs I come across with everyone.” “Haven’t you muted the chat?” Jimin asks Yoongi with a small laugh, not expecting an answer when he already knows it. Taehyung is exasperated that no one answered his messages during the last week of the break and that Yoongi could possibly have the heart to ghost everyone — accusations the sleepy man doesn’t even respond to. In the meanwhile, Jungkook sighs at how his friends are already making a loud ruckus and ruffles your hair as he gets up from the table. He asks what you want for breakfast and then returns shortly with two trays of food. It’s when he sits down that Yoongi raises his head again. “So, how long have you guys been together?” “We’re not together—” Jungkook answers without missing a single beat. “Cut the crap,” Yoongi deadpans, halting his chewing. “It’s too goddamn early for this bullshit.” “What?” Jungkook’s grin is swelled across his face. “Can’t best friends kiss each other sometimes?” Hoseok’s eyes are enormous, having no idea where this is coming from. Jimin is sitting on the edge of his seat, anxious for the transpiring events. Taehyung is utterly befuddled but Yoongi, on the other hand, wears a completely blank expression. The lethargic man is wholly unimpressed. Jungkook bursts out laughing. “Okay, okay. It’s true. We’re dating.” Immediately, there’s an uproar. But it’s mostly from Taehyung. “I knew it! I knew it!” Jungkook laughs and argues back with a ‘no, you didn’t’. At the same time, Jimin is smiling tenderly and giggling at his friend’s reaction. Hoseok is grinning as well and even the corner of Yoongi’s mouth quirks. The latter man mumbles that it’s about damn time and you’re sheepishly smiling as your face heats under the attention. Jimin curiously asks, “When did this happen?” “In Tahiti,” you answer. “Somewhere along there…” “So it’s been like two months and you never thought to tell us?!” Taehyung is once again exasperated, shaking his head like he can’t believe it. “It’s only been a month and a half,” Jungkook says as he throws a fry into his mouth, chewing in his cheek. “We wanted to see where it would go and stuff…” “Obviously it went well enough that you two are still together,” Yoongi points out. “I think it’s going well.” You turn to Jungkook. “Don’t you?” “It’s been going awfully,” he remarks in sarcasm, making you scoff. Laughter bubbles out of his chest and he leans over to gently knock his head against yours. “I’m kidding. Kidding.” “Wait, does this mean you two are going to be cute and gross together now?” Taehyung’s face wrinkles into a frown. “Of course they are,” Hoseok laughs. “It’s a requirement.” “No, we won’t make things weird,” you protest. “Promise.” “They’ve always been gross together,” Yoongi mutters with his mouth-full, pointing his wooden chopsticks at him and completely ignoring what you’ve said. “Haven’t you noticed?” “Congratulations, you two,” Jimin speaks sincerely with his eyes crinkled into half-moons. “Thanks.” You laugh, leaning into Jungkook. “I lucked out, really.” Your boyfriend clicks his tongue in annoyance. “I’m the one who lucked out.” “Ugh.” Taehyung’s nose wrinkles and he feigns disgust. If anyone looked any more satisfied right now, it was him. You suppose to outsiders, your relationship with Jungkook was a long time coming. “They’re being gross already. Go get a room.” You scoff at him and turn to Hoseok. “Is Aeri coming?” “She isn’t,” he says simply without looking you in the eye, “She and I broke up.” “What?” Several heads whirl over, the focus now brought onto him. This was new news too — information that was much more bitter. “Yeah, it happened during the summer.” Hoseok offers a tiny, reserved smile. He keeps his head down low and that’s only when you notice the darkened circle underneath his eyes, the sickly colour of his skin and his disheveled hair. “It just….didn’t really end up working out.” “Oh.” “Why didn’t you tell us?” Jimin asks gently as Taehyung automatically puts his brownie onto Hoseok’s food tray in an attempt to make him feel better. “It just happened a week ago. Honestly—” He sits back. “—I’m still trying to process it, so yeah.” Yoongi reaches over, stiffly patting him on the back. “It’s going to be alright, dude.” The corners of his lips pull a bit. “Thanks.” You could’ve never fathomed it. They got together long before you and Jungkook did, but you always thought that they would work out. Someone as bubbly as Hoseok with someone as kind and timid as Aeri, it seemed like a match that you wouldn’t think twice about. To hear that they’ve split is shocking. But you don’t pry for details when it’s their personal business. You don’t try to figure out what exactly happened when it was the last thing you wanted to talk about when you experienced it yourself. But you’re also not sure how to feel. And Jungkook picks up on it when you’re quiet for some time. “Are you alright?” He syncs his slow steps into yours as the pair of you head back to your dorms together. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just thinking.” After a beat, you turn to look at your boyfriend. Your eyes meet one another’s. “What happens if we break up, Jungkook?” “Then we break up.” Jungkook takes your hand. “But we’d still be okay.” “You think so?” “I didn’t start off this relationship with being your boyfriend. Frankly, I didn’t want to be your friend at all—” “Hey.” “—but we were friends, so it’ll stay that way.” You sigh, keeping your eyes trained forward. You squeeze his hand securely. “You make it sound so easy. It isn’t.” “I know, but that doesn’t mean I won’t try to make things work.” He moves his fingers to interlace with yours and comforts your worries, “So you don’t have to worry. Every relationship is different, right? Ours is unlike anyone else's as theirs are not like ours...if that makes any sense.” “No, it does.” You share a smile with him. You don’t know if it’ll last — but at this moment, you want to savour every second with Jungkook. // You catch sight of a familiar girl across the dining hall during dinner, and with one glance given to your boyfriend, he responds with a reassuring nod, having already followed your line of sight. So instead of sitting at the usual table, you confidently beeline straight for her. And you take your place across from the girl. Aeri lifts her chin, surprise written across her expression. “Y/N?” “Hey, how’s it going?” You smile, taking your utensils and beginning to eat. “I hope this seat isn’t taken.” “N-No, it isn't.” She peeks over her shoulder for a second and then looks back at you, blinking several times. “It’s going well. How about you?” “Same old, nothing really ever changes.” You backtrack when Jungkook sticks out in your mind. “Well….a few things, but anyway, how was your internship?” “It was good. Great.” Aeri gives a softened smile that’s sad around the edges. She’s playing with her food without eating it. Her voice sounds thick like she’s been crying. “I learned a lot and the people there were pretty nice.” “You worked at a restaurant, right?” “Yeah.” She names it and some small talk is made about internships. Afterwards, you discuss your summers and how traveling went. With time, Aeri seems to ease up again. And when there’s a few seconds of silence, you decide to address the elephant in the room. “I heard you and Hoseok broke up….” “Yeah, it was mutual.” The corners of her mouth move stiffly like she’s been training to smile naturally. Her eyes meet yours. “Thank you for sitting with me and keeping me company.” “Of course I would. You’re my friend,” you reply earnestly. “Why wouldn’t I?” “It’s just…” The girl shifts uncomfortably in her seat, not sure if she should utter the truth. “You’re friends with Hoseok too, so I thought you would side with him.” You adamantly shake your head. “I don’t side with anyone. It’s not fair to leave someone out because of another relationship and plus, you were my friend first.” You place your foot down, fist slamming on the table and while it startles the girl, genuine laughter streams from her. “I know what it feels like too, so I would never do that to someone else.” Aeri nods, eyes glossy. “Thank you.” “It’s not a problem.” Your arm stretches over the table, hand placed on top of her’s. “If you ever need me, I’ll be here.” It’s déjà vu. An out-of-body experience. To be sitting across from someone who’s gone through something akin to what you have, it feels like you’re looking at your past self. A reflection of you more than half a year ago. And you reach out to her as you wished someone did to you. As Jungkook had done to you. You realize that he was there when you needed someone most and it makes you glad he became a part of your life when he did.

It’s another one of those days — of you and Jungkook lying on his bed, tapping away on your phones. The pair of you were cuddling until you each got bored and reached for your phones. And Jungkook got uncomfortable in his position and rolled over, so you’re both squished on his tiny bed, laughing every once in a while and showing one another funny memes or videos. It’s a luxury that won’t last for long. Once you’re both into the semester, it’ll be textbooks in your hands instead of phones and you’ll be sitting up, scratching your heads, being driven crazy with theories that don’t make sense and forced to memorize countless recipes. So you enjoy this sleepy relaxation while you can. “Hey.” Your eyes stray away from your screen to his walls and your brows furrow as a question comes to mind. “Who do you like more? IU or me?” There’s a long silence. The silence draws on. Your arm lowers and your head shifts onto the pillow to look at him. Jungkook is staring at the ceiling. And the silence continues. One second — ten seconds — thirty seconds... Your brows lift. “Seriously?” “What? It’s like asking me to choose between my mom and dad.” “Did you just compare me to your mom?” Jungkook laughs too loudly, too stiffly. “I-I’m kidding. Of course I would choose you.” He reaches over to plant a kiss on your cheek, but you dodge, sitting up. You give him an incredulous expression, hovering over your boyfriend. “You’re a terrible liar.” He grins, sitting up as well. “Are you jealous?” “That my boyfriend would rather get together with a celebrity than me? Nope,” you pop the ‘p’ harshly, making him giggle. “Not at all. Why would I be?” “Jieun’s been a part of my life for longer…..” Jungkook says, then laughs again and tries to backtrack. “But obviously I still love you more because you’re actually here.” “But if she were here..?” you ask him and when it gets quiet again, you reach out to pinch and tickle his side. Jungkook squirms, laughing even harder while you grin. It’s not like you were actually upset or irrational enough to be jealous over a celebrity crush. You’ve long known about his fanboying hobby and love for IU after all. It’s just fun to tease him. “You gonna ditch me for Lee Jieun, huh? You think she can put up with your shit like I do?!” “Course not!” He grips your wrists so you can stop tickling him. “I love you. But if she were to kick down the door when we’re getting married, I might just have to go with her. Might.” “Okay.” You relent. “Fine. I’ll admit, if she asked me to go with her, I’d go too, so she can be your hall pass.” “Hall pass?” Jungkook grins. “Who’s yours?” You hum, tapping your chin in contemplation. But it doesn’t take you long to choose. “Song Joongki. He’s handsome, he’s kind, he’s rich.” “And how does that help?” “Well, maybe he’ll fall in love with me and want to get married — then I’d get rich.” It’s his turn to be put in disbelief, but you have no reservations. “Song Joongki has great proportions too. Have you seen his legs? And have you seen his face? I wouldn’t be surprised if he was an angel who descended down on this planet to bless us all. He’s just so boy-next-door one second and then like handsome-handsome the next. I wouldn’t mind if he wanted to sweep me off my feet. He’s just so charming in everything he does, like—” “Alright, Alright.” Jungkook puts his hand on your face. “I get it.” You peel his palm off with a pout. “Hey, you get your crushes and I get mine.” “I know.” He pushes your shoulder lightly and you let yourself fall back onto his mattress. Jungkook moves to hover over you, smiling at your quiet obedience in spite of your defiant exterior. You’re all bark, but no bite. “Jealous?” You cock your head to the side, lip pulling up to a smirk. Jungkook scoffs. “It’s not like you’ll ever get to meet him.” “Don’t ruin my dreams.” Jungkook smiles, unaware of how wrong he would soon be. But for now, there’s not a single ounce of worry or concern in him. He knows Song-fucking-Joongki would never know how amazing you are. And it’s unfortunate since you might actually blow the actor away. He’ll never have you smiling at him, pouting at him, underneath him and crying out his name. But it’s okay — Jungkook doesn’t mind taking one for the team and having you all to himself. // There’s a loud ruckus and it’s early too. Jungkook has never felt more like Yoongi. He wonders if this is how the man feels every single morning. Tired and exhausted and having to hear high-pitched screeches only irks him even more and unintentionally puts him in a sour mood. It was just too loud and too much of everything. “What’s going on?” Taehyung turns to him, arms crossed. For once, the brunette is wholly unenthusiastic. “Dude, I was texting you all morning. Did you not check your messages?” “I might or might not have muted you like Yoongi did.” There are girls gathered and a few boys as well, a whole crowd of people standing together and blocking the way to the dining hall. The sound of murmuring fills the corridor. “Is someone giving out something for free?” “No.” Taehyung sighs. “You know the actor, Song Joongki? He’s here.” “What?” “Beats me.” The tall brunette shrugs. “Apparently he’s sponsoring the university and making a donation to promote culinary arts. It probably has something to do with the commercials he’s been doing. I don’t know. They were trying to keep it on the down low but someone leaked it over Twitter that he was visiting and now everyone knows.” Jungkook is stunned. For a moment, he wonders if you’re actually a witch. It was just too convenient considering the jesting conversation he had with you nights ago. Or perhaps it was the damned world wanting him to eat his own words. But whatever the case is, Jungkook isn’t able to dwell for long. Suddenly, the sea of students split, gasps and screams echoing down the hall. There are professors leading the way with the Dean, ushering students to move aside. There’s one or two bodyguards as well, their arms stretched to keep the actor safe. But as Jungkook stands there at a distance with his friend, he manages a far away peek at the dark-haired actor in his black suit as he passes with a small, polite smile and his head dipped. Holy shit. You were right. He’s handsome — but even more so in real life. “Oh my god. Was that him?! I didn’t get a good look.” — “That was him!” — “He’s so cute!” Everyone is fawning over Song Joongki. And even Jungkook, who doesn’t have a particular taste for men, can appreciate the actor. “My mom loves him. Maybe I should get her an autograph.” Taehyung thinks about it for a second and then shakes his head. “Nah. That’s too much work. Let’s just go eat.” The crowd moves past and Jungkook catches sight of a very familiar mop of head in the midst of the horde of people — a girl whose eyes are wide and excited. But his own damn girlfriend doesn’t even notice him. Instead, you’re holding Aeri’s hand and hopping up and down. “C’mon, Aeri! We’ll get a better look up front.” Taehyung bursts out laughing as the corridor finally clears. “Was that just Y/N?” Jungkook sighs lightly with a sheepish smile. “Yep.” The dining hall has never been so quiet and empty. It’s eerie, almost like someone bought the place out to have a private buffet of sorts. Jungkook finds Jimin, Hoseok, and Yoongi already seated at the table — somehow they had squeezed themselves through the crowd. Everyone greets each other with raised brows, silence desirable after the whole commotion. But Taehyung, on the other hand, is enjoying Jungkook’s astonishment too much. “Looks like Song Joongki is also Mr. Steal Your Girl. Guess where Y/N is.” “She left you?” Yoongi is stunned and then starts chuckling. “She didn’t leave me.” “Well can you blame her?” Hoseok pipes up. “He’s pretty handsome. My sister was a fan of him in Descendants of the Sun.” “Really?” Jimin nods. “I liked him more in Innocent Man.” “I said she didn’t leave me,” Jungkook repeats in exasperation. “And it’s whatever, he’s her hall pass anyway.” That remark surprises all his friends. “So you don’t care?” Jungkook shrugs. The boy slurps up his noodles, not paying much mind. “It would be fucking impressive.” And he means it. If his girl can charm on Song-fucking-Joongki, he’d be impressed. You should do whatever it takes to live your best life and he’ll always root for you. Meeting Song Joongki is probably your dream come true anyway, so he has no reason to stop you and doesn’t want to. “It would be a one in a lifetime chance, so why not?” “Wow.” Hoseok nods, impressed at the carefree attitude and how secure Jungkook is. “Speak of the devil….” You appear in the dining center, running at full speed, grabbing some toast. At the last second, you spot Jungkook and your eyes light up. You sprint over. “Hey!” You plop a kiss at the top of your boyfriend’s head, making him grin. “Did you guys see him?!”

“Sure did.” “We saw him alright.” “I’m just grabbing some food for Aeri and I but he’s going to the kitchens later and Miss. Kang says she’s going to introduce a group of us as the baking students!” You’re shrieking for joy, jumping up and down. Yoongi winces at the noise and gives you a dirty look, but it makes Jungkook giggle. You turn to him. “You don’t mind, do you?” “Why would I?” He grins and encourages, “Go get it! I believe in you.” You nod, running along and he watches your backside with a softened smile. Out of nowhere, Taehyung snickers. “You are so whipped.” “Fuck off.” He continues to slurp down his noodles. // Song Joongki doesn’t stay for long — but it sure feels like it. All of his social media is flooded with pictures and clips of the actor being taken on a tour around campus, snapping a few selfies with fans, and real life updates every twenty seconds. Jungkook even gets a call from his aunt who caught wind of what was happening. Jungkook, himself, is kind of over it. He’s not so starstruck and dazzled like he was earlier, but he still checks his phone every so often for your texts. It’s been silent for the entire day and he can only wonder what ended up happening. Luckily, he doesn’t need to wait for long when nearing his bedtime, there’s a knock at his door. Jungkook opens it to see your sheepish expression and your body clad in your cotton pajamas. “Hey, thought I would stop by.” “Did you sneak in again?” “It’s not sneaking when no one notices in the first place.” He notices that you’re shivering from the chilly air outside and quickly ushers you into his small dorm room. The corner of his mouth pulls when you automatically crawl into his bed and pull the toasty covers up to your chin like you were always supposed to be there. “So…” Jungkook turns around after shutting the door, curiosity ebbing away at him. “What ended up happening?” “What do you mean?” You blink at him. “Did you end up….you know….” “No.” Your expression is blank. “I really don’t know.” He sighs, having to explicitly word it. “Did you bed Joongki?” There’s a long silence. The silence draws on. You snort. “What? You thought I was gone all this time cause I was fucking Song Joongki?” “Listen, we agreed on each other’s hall passes. I won’t get mad. Trust me, I’d be pretty impressed, but I want to hear all the details.” “Well, sorry to say, captain, but there isn’t any.” You pull back the corner of the covers, patting the empty spot beside you. Jungkook doesn’t hesitate slipping into his small bed with you and he finds a comfortable position. His arm drapes over your waist, allowing the soft yellow glow of his bedside lamp to cast your shadows on his wall. There’s a beat of quietness and then you’re laughing again. “What?” “I can’t believe you thought I slept with Joongki.” “So you didn’t?” “No.” You give an incredulous look, exasperated at how dumb your boyfriend can be at times. It’s not like you were any better, but still. “You really thought I could get close enough to sleep with him? He’s an actor! He practically had twenty bodyguards around. I barely got an autograph in — which I’m framing on my wall, by the way.” “Oh.” “Sorry that a famous actor didn’t fuck your girlfriend,” your voice drips of sarcasm. “I didn’t mean to be such a disappointment.” Jungkook scoffs. “Why would I be disappointed?” “Well, you’re acting like you’re let down that I didn’t get to use my hall pass.” You’re fiddling with a loose thread at the neckline of his cotton shirt while your other arm is folded underneath your head. He stares at you. “I wouldn’t want to anyway, by the way. Thought I would just mention that. Some things are better left for fantasy. And I have you. Why would I want someone else?” His arms curl around you, pulling you into his body. Jungkook cuddles your frame and you melt against him, smiling. “I’m not disappointed,” he teases. “He could never treat you as well as I do.” “I don’t know about that,” you chime. “He was really handsome though.” “Was he nice too?” “Super. I didn’t really get to talk to him, but he listened to Miss. Kang’s entire spiel about ovens.” You pull apart a little to see him, eyes meeting. “Apparently there are rumours Joongki might come back. Who knows, he might fall in love with me this time and we might get married. You’re not invited to the wedding, by the way.” The boy feigns offence, eyes glimmering in the low lights. “Why not?”

“It’s weird if my ex is there. I’m sure Joong-bear wouldn’t like it.” “Joong-bear?” He raises his brows. “It’s an inside joke,” you playfully taunt. “You wouldn’t get it.” Jungkook scoffs, then laughs. “You best believe I would kick down the doors to the chapel and object to the marriage.” “And what if IU showed up?” He hums. “Polygamy is underrated.” You giggle. “So all four of us in one marriage?” “Sure.” Jungkook shrugs. “Even if it’s just Joongki, I wouldn’t mind if it was us three.” “Me too. Joongki, Jieun, and me. It’s perfect.” “I meant me.” He starts to tickle you, laughing when you do. “Did you forget about me?” “What?” You squirm against him. “Can’t hear you.” It’s an absolutely absurd scenario, completely unfounded and ludicrous. But Jungkook loves to be ridiculous with you. He holds you and his eyes stray upwards onto his wall. Beside his IU’s posters are pictures of you and him — polaroids taken throughout the summer to the one bigger frame that holds the photograph at the wedding. The one where you and him are staring at each other mid-laugh after he caught you in his arms.

#bts fanfic #bts scenario #jungkook fanfic #jungkook fluff #jungkook scenario #welcome to the daily life of dumb and dumber lol #this is a very lighthearted chapter so enjoy it!

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nautilusopus · 4 years ago

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Hello! I don’t know much about Jewry, but I want to understand, why do you think that Aeris looks like a Jewith? thank you for writing on this subject, I really thought about it

FFVII has a lot of references to Judaism sprinkled throughout it. It's not unique in that regard; Japan did that a lot with the Judeochristian mythos for the same reasons we in the United States will utilise Greek mythology in our fiction, since it's a cool foreign thing that basically none of the population practises and thus will look suitably exotic. Besides things just thrown in for flavour with no wider thematic significance (for example Tifa), there's also a lot of references with actual plot significance.

If anyone wants the in-depth version (because there is LOADS of shit to get into), I've written posts about it here and here. Long story short, though, it's because Aeris is pretty clearly Jewish-coded*, so I figured I might as well have that reflect in a modern day AU where Judaism actually exists on Earth.

short overview though:

Promised Land as a concept, both as a physical location and a state of mind/the world that must be reached in order to actually find it

Cultural diaspora attempting to reach said Promised Land

She's got Jew hair (you said it, Anon, not me!)

Cetra lineage being passed down, and passed down fully, via the mother. Aeris is considered fully Cetra because her mother was one.

The whole "spark of the divine being in all of us" concept of God and him being omnipresent in every part of the world, rather than some guy just hanging out in the clouds (also some overlap with Shintoism on this one, albeit in a more literal sense)

Not to mention the whole thing with Jenova and Sephiroth. Hope this helps clarify,

(*This is not to say that I think Squaresoft had any commentary to provide by making Aeris Jewish-coded, I think they just did it for the same reason they threw in the rest of the Jewish stuff, i.e.: because they thought it looked cool.)

#forfdorfsorf #spitegarbage #asks #Anonymous

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vivilove-jonsa · 4 years ago

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Young at Heart at Oldstones

Since we have some lovely Jonsa-themed WIP Wednesday headers for Modern and Canon fic both, I’m going to share a couple of different things that have been sitting in my big Maybe file collecting dust. (You can find the Modern AU Headers here)

I don’t see much fic of Jon having a relationship with his grandmother so that was partly what sparked the idea for this one. Someday, I’ll get enough of it done to start posting on ao3 but here’s a good little bit of it.

****

“I don’t know about this, Mom. We’ve not spent much time together since I was a kid. What do I even say to her?” Jon asked as he had the phone cradled between his ear and shoulder, searching for a clean shirt.

“Just talk. She’ll be happy you came to see her.”

“Yeah but it’s going to be awkward after about five minutes.”

“You can handle a little awkward, can’t you? You’re not a kid anymore.”

She was right. He wasn’t. He was twenty-three and a graduate student at Riverlands University. He could give an hour or two of free time to his grandmother and not whine about it being a sacrifice. “I’m going…once I find a clean shirt.”

Lyanna laughed through the phone, making him smile to hear it. “I know it’s thirty minutes away but it’ll mean so much to her, Jon. I call her here and there but you know it’s…well, it’s awkward with us.”

He knew that. How could it not be awkward? Considering the circumstances of his conception and birth and the strained relations that had arisen between more than just his mother and father, he felt his mother was quite thoughtful for even bothering to call his paternal grandmother.

Speaking of which…

“You know, she has three kids who could visit her.”

“Yeah, she does and none of them visit. Your Aunt Dany is young…”

“Barely younger than me!”

“But she’s always been her father’s daughter at heart and she still blames your grandmother for the divorce.”

“Oh, yeah because Aerys is such a gem,” he said sarcastically.

“Families are complicated, Jon.”

“Tell me about it.”

“Anyway, Viserys can’t visit.” No, his sociopath of an uncle wouldn’t be visiting his mother. Hard to do when you’re behind bars. “And your father…”

“Is a self-absorbed asshole who found a retirement community for his mother four hours away from where he lives.” He heard his mother’s sigh and felt guilty for dredging up hurtful things. “Sorry.”

“It’s alright. You’re not wrong. She’s so excited you’re coming, Jon. I hope you can enjoy the visit, knowing that at least.”

“Yeah, I’m sure it’ll be okay. Love you.”

“I love you, too, sweetheart.”

Oldstones Retirement Community was not a nursing home although he’d thought of it as one. He’d pictured some old depressing building resembling a hospital with blank eggshell white walls, dingy tiled floors and musty-smelling, hospital-style rooms.

Therefore, Jon was pleasantly surprised to see it was indeed a community, a neighborhood for the elderly with rows and rows of neat individual bungalows with their own little postage stamp yards spread out in an arch around a larger one level ‘community center.’

However, in order to get a pass to enter the gated section where those bungalows were, you had to check in at the center first.

Parking out front, he walked inside the center to get his bearings, the whoosh of the automatic doors giving him a blast of air conditioning on the exceptionally warm autumn day.

He caught sight of a young woman in navy blue scrubs holding the arm of an elderly man as they walked along. Thinking she might be an employee of the center, he approached.

“Hi. I was wondering if…”

His words and his train of thought were effectively stopped in their tracks when she turned towards him with forget-me-not blue eyes and waves of auburn hair.

“Oh, hello,” she replied, a musical lilt to her voice as she looked at him expectantly.

Damn, she was beautiful. She was around his age, maybe a couple of years younger. Could she already be a nurse? Or just an assistant here?

There was a pattern to her scrubs, cartoon characters he recognized from childhood including Wiley Wolfe. It was cute. She was stunning.

The old guy beside her cleared his throat irritably and Jon realized he was just standing there staring at her and her scrubs. It’s not like he didn’t know how to talk to women but he felt his mouth going dry while he was drowning in those eyes of hers.

Her expectant smile began to morph into one of concern as the silence stretched on. Say something! Use your words, you idiot!

So unfortunately, Jon blurted out the first words that came to mind. “I’m here to see Gamma.”

Those were not the words I had in mind.

The beauty’s lips twitched and Jon felt heat flooding his face. Of course, he’d fall back to what he’d called Rhaella when he’d been two (not that he’d ever stopped calling her that when it was just him and her.)

“I mean, I was looking for my grandmother.”

“Oh, well…do you know which bungalow she’s in or…”

“Reception’s over there, kid,” the old man interrupted curtly. “My granddaughter doesn’t have your gamma hiding under her top either.”

“Grandpa!”

Jon’s red face was getting redder but now. Hers was, too. “I wasn’t looking!” Well, his eyes had lingered on her top for a minute there. “I was just…I like the wolf bit,” he said, nodding towards her chest. “Wiley was always my favorite.”

The wolf bit?! ‘Wiley was always my favorite?’ Gods, you are such a dumbass, he thought, rolling his eyes at himself.

The old guy with his shaggy grey beard shot through with hints of red continued to glare at him. He had a cane and Jon wondered if he was about to use it on him. At least, she was smiling.

“I’m sorry for assuming. I just saw the scrubs and thought…”

“No, it’s okay. I’m a nursing student, thus the scrubs. I just came by to see my grandfather today after my classes were done.”

“Checking up on me for your mother, you mean.”

“You know I want to see you anyway, Grandpa.”

She was still smiling but there was an edge of hurt feelings in her voice, too. Jon didn’t like the idea of anyone hurting her feelings although he didn’t even know her name. Yet.

The old man took the hint though and grasped her hand. “I know, darling. Sorry. They’ll help you out at reception, kid.”

“Yeah, okay. Thanks.”

“Who’re you seeing anyway?”

“Rhaella Targaryen.”

“Rhaella?” he said, his bushy eyebrows raised. “Well, that’s swell. I’m her neighbor, Hoster Tully.”

He held out his hand so Jon shook it. “Jon Snow.” He looked hopefully towards Hoster’s granddaughter, unable to hide his grin.

“I’m Sansa Stark,” she said, shaking Jon’s hand as well, her cheeks still flushed a lovely shade of pink. “And I’m glad you have such good taste in cartoons.”

“Yeah, thanks,” he said, grinning wider. “It’s nice to meet you both.” Especially you.

“Have a nice time with your gamma, Jon,” Hoster chuckled. Never living down that introduction then. “The sweet shop’s open. You wanna ice cream, darling?”

Jon smiled, thinking his grandmother would likely ask him the same question.

Sansa cocked an eyebrow at him and put a hand on her hip. “Do I want an ice cream or is it you who wants one, Grandpa?” she asked, clearly amused.

“I’m sure you’ll be reminding me of the doctor saying to watch my sweets, huh?”

“Maybe.”

“I've been a good boy, I swear. I also remember when you couldn’t say no to mint chocolate chip,” he added in a slightly pleading tone.

“I still struggle to say no to it,” she laughed. “Maybe they have a no-sugar alternative."

"Blech. Help me out here, Jon."

"I, uh..." He looked between them both, Mr. Tully with pleading puppy dog eyes and Sansa with her hand still on her hip. "I mean, one little scoop’s not so bad and I'll bet they have a variety of options with, um...different sizes and calories, sugar-free and...you know I've never been here before in my life, right?"

They both started laughing and he was mesmerized by the tinkling sound of Sansa's as her eyes sparkled.

"Well, maybe we'll check out the varieties available, Grandpa," Sansa relented, giving Jon a wink. Hot damn! "It was nice to meet you, Jon. I hope you enjoy your visit.”

“Thanks. It was nice to meet you, too,” he replied as they continued down the hallway.

Sansa’s a pretty name. Where do you go to school? Riverlands? Please, say Riverlands. They've got a nursing program there...I think. Do you come here often? Can I buy you both an ice cream? Can I have your number? Do you have a boyfriend? I really do like the wolf bit.

Naturally, he’d think of a dozen things to say as she was walking away, not that he could say most of those things when they'd just met.

With a sigh, he headed towards the reception desk as Sansa and her grandfather disappeared from his view.

“Can I help you?” a woman wearing pink scrubs, a friendly smile and a name tag that said ‘Yaya’ on it asked.

“Yes, I’m here to see my gamma.” He groaned inwardly as her smile widened. “I mean, my grandmother. I want to visit Rhaella Targaryen.”

“Oh, Rhaella! What’s your name, honey?”

“Jon Snow.”

“Okay, Jon Snow, let’s take a look.” She opened a ledger to nearly the back page, her finger tracing downwards. “Do you have an ID on you, Jon?”

“Yeah.”

He grimaced as he pulled out his wallet. It was possible they asked this of all visitors but he had to wonder if his grandfather and uncle didn’t make this necessary for his grandmother. There was still an Order of Protection in place for his grandfather and Viserys wouldn’t be welcome lots of places, particularly around a potentially physically vulnerable population. Well, I’ll bet Old Hoster with his cane can take care of himself alright.

Yaya looked it over and then smiled, passing him a slip of paper with a word written on it.

“Hippie?”

“Yeah, that’s the gate’s passcode. Just use the alpha-numeric keypad to enter it and you can pull your vehicle through.”

“Okay but hippie?”

“The residents vote on it once a month. They tend to go with something that gives them a chuckle.”

“What was last month’s?”

“Prunes.”

“No shit?” Yaya’s eyes widened before she threw her head back and laughed. Jon hadn’t meant to curse in front of a stranger but when he thought about the meaning there… “Sorry,” he said, failing to stifle his answering laughter.

After they’d settled down again, Yaya asked, “Does she know you’re coming?”

“Yeah, she does.”

“Great. I know she’ll be happy to see you. She doesn’t get…” Yaya trailed off, a soft melancholy settling in her warm brown eyes.

“Many visitors, I know,” he said, shifting guiltily. He’d moved here six weeks ago. He could’ve come sooner. “I…maybe that’ll change.”

“I hope so, Jon. Have a nice visit.”

#jonsa fanfiction #vivilove-jonsa fic #wip wednesday #jonsa #new fic that may never see the light of day on ao3 #but have some of it here anyway

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jekkiefan · 4 years ago

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Author Interview Tag

Tagged by @drama-queen-supreme Sorry you keep getting tagged in these writing things. Though if you ever wanted to pick up writing again I’d be willing to beta read.

Name: Mady (but ya’ll can call me JekkieFan)

Fandom(s): too many, but I’m currently obsessed with The Glass Scientists/Jekyll and Hyde/Gothic literature, Good Omens, Undertale, and Over the Garden Wall. Also Razia’s Shadow has been living in my head rent free for a few years.

Where you post: On ao3 mostly, but sometimes on tumblr

Most popular oneshot: “In Which Chocolates Are Given” is my most popular one shot. It’s a Good Omens fic of that deleted scene when Crowley gives Aziraphale boxed chocolate.

Most popular multichapter fic: “Let Our Walls Cave In” another Good Omens fic. This was for the GOmens Holiday Swap in 2019. I had SO MUCH fun writing it!

Favorite story you’ve written so far: Well, I’d have to say that it’s the script for my webcomic The Tale of Corsinby. But this interview seems to be fanfiction focused. I’d have to say either “Let Our Walls Cave In” or one of my Grillster fics “Orbiting the Sun”

Fic you were nervous to post: “Out of My Depth” for sure. This fic is part of a series, and I was so worried about the fic being as good as the one before it. The stress really got to me when I was writing the second half of the fic.

How you choose your titles: Lately I just figure out the theme, or reoccurring visuals. Then just kinda make that the title??? Though for a while I just used song lyrics lol

Do you outline?: Yes, but very poor outlines! I don’t usually stick with them either. Unless it’s for a prompt.

Complete: Yes! Well... except for that fic *has middle school flashbacks*

In progress: I have no fics in the works at the moment. But I am still writing my webcomic TToC

Coming Soon/Not yet started: This one Glass Scientists/Wizard of Oz AU I’ve been itching for write the final draft for five years now.

Do you accept prompts?: Yep! Might take me a while to write it, but I can do little oneshots

Upcoming work that you’re most excited about: Does The Tale of Corsinby count? Like it’s out now, but I’m super excited about it! But fic-wise I guess I’m looking forward to that Glass Scientists/Wizard of Oz AU

Tagging the following people: @drbibliophile @lordkingsmith @raevenlywrites @aeris-blue and @dietraumerei

#jekkiefan says a thing #the tale of corsinby #good omens #grillster #the glass scientists

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stabbyfoxandrew · 7 months ago

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Aerie (Kevin stripper anon here 😅)

I too have read your KevJean vampire au.

I would definitely read pt.2. I think the problem is not with the story or the style or anything but with the short involvement due to the reduced scene maybe?

The beauty of your wips resides in the depth of your characters, of their daily activities, thoughts and aims. In a sentence > we (readers) get really attached to them.

While a short scene doesn't always give you a chance to do the same job and that's not your fault!

Don't give up little angel, someone here loves your writing 😇

<3333 thanks anon

i think the main problem is simply that kevjean isn't the most popular ship and vampire aus aren't everyone's cup of tea? :') i mean, not to whine (says the chronic whiner) but wahhhhhh. i worked really hard on it :'))

actually i really like what i have written. from jean being changed into a vampire to riko finding out and being a massive cunt about it, to kevin finding out... like it's Good but man i spent so long on it that now i don't even wanna look at that doc :'))

i love you<3333

#being called little angel made me want to cry uncontrollably btw... (positive)#anon #answered #love #<33333333

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phosphorus-noodles · 9 months ago

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1, 6, 7, 8, 16, 22, 24, 28, 46, 49, 68? (if that's too many u can leave some out yesyes)

WAHH that's so many,, /pos

1 - Do you daydream a lot before you write, or go for it as soon as the ideas strike?

I usually get struck with a Vision and hurry and write down the outline of the thing I want to write with bits and pieces sprinkled in, and then I flesh it out with daydreams over time, so... both?

6 - What’s the last line you wrote?

Already did this one, but here's s'more context before it:

“Aw, don’t be like that, this will be fun! Besides, I promise it’s safe.”

“Promise, huh?” Joel’s tone is skeptical, but he’s smiling just as wide.

“I promise!”

7 - Post a snippet from a wip.

“Yeah yeah yeah, whatever, my maths assignment isn’t as important as time with my favorite person in the multiverse,” Oli says. “Besides, it’s due next week! I have pleeenty of time.”

“Favorite person in the multiverse?” Joel snorts a small laugh and shoulders his bag. “That’s sappier than fresh azalea honey.”

“Aww, but you liked it!” Oli says, lightly poking Joel’s cheek with his finger. “You’re all pink!”

(I just think this part is cute <3)

8 - Post an out-of-context spoiler from a wip.

Ohh... hmm that's tricky... probably. it was bound to happen sooner or later, right?

16 - Do you write by hand, on your phone, or on your laptop?

I usually record my Visions on my phone in a note and then transfer it to a google doc on my computer, but I write on my phone sometimes when I'm out and about too

22 - Do you title your fics before, during, or after the writing process? How do you come up with titles?

It depends? Usually after, but my current wip I had the idea for a title and based the story around it kinda. All the titles in my current 'era' of writing have come from my au playlist ^^

24 - How do you choose whose POV to write in?

OHH I was thinking about this earlier... usually it's whatever character will lead to the better "reveal" if that makes sense?? Like in my last fic it was Joel, because Oli knew something he didn't, and it would be more interesting to read about piecing events together from clues Joel picked up rather than just knowing what happened automatically from it being Oli's pov. There's gotta be built up, y'know?

28 - What area of writing do you want to improve in?

Gosh... probably descriptions? And more natural word variations... I usually edit the same sentence over and over to make sure the structure and words are different from existing sentences, so I can fake it just by overanalyzing, but it'd be nice to come easier ahjfsdfh

46 - If you could only write one type of AU for the rest of your life, what would it be?

Hmm... probably soulmates, it's all I've written so far tbf /lh

49 - What fic of yours would you say is the best introduction to you as a writer?

Probably this one bc it's the only one right now that I don't have major problems with HAH

68 - Are there any fics that influenced you to write the way you do?

YOU!!! YOUR FICS, AERIE!!!

Every time I go to write about the Boys I go back and reread the snippets you wrote bc I love how you write them so so much and I Need to absorb your writing style right now !!! /silly

(Ask game!)

#THANK YOU AERIE MWAH MWAH #loving you forever <33 #pho.asks #aeriedwelling

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firesign23 · 4 years ago

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I saw you mention in discord a 10 things I hate bout u idea! 🙏

Okay, so first of all, you have to understand that that film is over 20 years old and I still quote it several times a week. It is that deeply embedded into my psyche. Second of all, you have to understand that I long ago swore I would never write a high school AU for anything, but after a year of occasionally tinkering and prodding the idea I would definitely write this one. And might, if I ever have the time. 😂

Right, so, the fic as I explain it to people (now under a cut for length):

Brienne and Selwyn move in her second year of high school, hoping to flee the memories of Brienne’s mother. Brienne is immediately befriended by Catelyn Stark, who at the start of their senior year declares loudly that she will not date until Brienne does. She means to draw Brienne out, is certain that she craves romance, and approaches it with the logic of a teenager. She refuses to back down. (I’m sorry if there are any teenagers reading this, but y’all are emotionally dumb. So were we.)

Enter Cersei. Cersei, who wants to date Cat. Cat who wants romance for her friend, and possibly to hate fuck the eldest Lannister in the girls bathroom after homeroom. Cersei, who hatches a plan--they’ll pay someone to date Brienne, and Cat is free and clear. But Cersei sure as shit isn’t spending her own money on this, and targets Joey Donner Petyr Baelish to bankroll the endeavour. They go through several potential suitors, but none of them are quite right.

Luckily for Cersei and Cat, Jaime is back after a year-long absence and Jaime would do anything for his sister. The real problem though, is that all of his money is going towards his university fund since Tywin won’t pay for it. He doesn’t have hundreds of dragons to drop on dates. Petyr is back in the game.

Combatant dynamic, blahblah, eventually Jaime gets past some of Brienne’s barriers and finds he likes her. They date for a couple of months--slow things at first, but as time goes on they bond over shared interests and griefs, slowly lowering the masks they hide behind. The first time they kiss is when Jaime brings Brienne to a fundraiser the charity set up in his mother’s name. There is something so contradictory between the sharp-edged Jaime she knows and the way he donates an odd amount of money, because that is what he had. (It is the excess from the date money from Baelish, though she doesn’t know it) She thinks she might be falling in love with him.

And then...

The “I’m not a virgin” moment comes when Brienne tells Catelyn about the Bet equivalent--she wasn’t unpopular at her previous school, not really, but she discovered that the flirtations and dates were about accessing her father’s money rather than a fondness for her, and she promptly decided that she would never let another man close like that, never let people have expectations about her--Catelyn realises that she has, whatever her intentions, fucked up severely and tells Brienne that she needs to talk to Jaime.

Whatever Brienne expected, it is not Jaime’s outpouring of regret as he explains that he had done this to help his sister, and yes the money helped, Tywin is refusing to fund his post-secondary choices (I’m pretty sure he wants to be a hospice nurse, remembering the ones who made his mother’s last days as comfortable as possible, and Tywin hates this on several levels), but it was mostly for Cersei but-- She never knows what it was he meant to say, because she walks away. She never should have let him close.

Cue a longer break/emotional arc about getting back together where Brienne is mourning her relationship with Cat and Jaime, and questioning whether this defensive thing had made her happy, and Cat and Jaime both apologising in ways that respect Brienne’s boundaries, culminating in first a Cat and Brienne reconciliation and then an end of year photography project that is a quiet declaration of love: All these pictures that are Jaime-adjacent, possibly juxtaposed by something of her mother's--either pictures her mother took fo Selwyn, or pictures they took together before she died, or a quote she would say about photography and love, and it is a very quiet declaration that Jaime understands

Brienne/Jaime and Cat/Cersei both attend prom, where Petyr Baelish tries to start shit. Catelyn punches him. Readers rejoice.

Extra headcanons:

The Discord conversation the other day was because I’d written a snippet of Ms Tyrell’s bad romance novel. It is… well, see for yourself. Amor laid his maidenly wench upon the bed, removing her red crimson and gold cloak that marked her as his, and growled like the tiger of his family crest. "Oh, Amor! Your bratwurst is so tumescent, however will it fit?" she whimpered, and his member quivered hotly. "Open the lube, you wicked creature, and I will show you."

The sonnet scene was never going to be directly translatable given Brienne’s reticent nature, so when the photography idea came to me I was like “Of course!”

Aerys is Jaime’s Milwaukee--All these rumours he killed a man, joined the Secret Service, etc and really he was in rehab for a hand injury

As much as I love 10 Things, what drew me to it is that there are some really interesting Kat/Patrick and Brienne/Jaime parallels in regards to loneliness and the loss of their mothers and learning to let another person see you. It’s what made me keep coming back again and again.

He buys her a camera. Out of his own funds.

#ask meme #all the fics I'll never write #my fanfic #look I have wanted this for a long time and I cannot be succinct #whoever it was that pointed out Ms Perky would be Olenna months ago deserves a cookie and an award #oh holy shit that's longer than I thought #put it under a cut now oops #headcanon meme

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fury-brand · 4 years ago

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21, 28, 34

21. "Is there an idea you want to write but haven't yet?"

Well I'm writing the thing I've always wanted to write RIGHT NOW so that's pretty cool. Follow up would probably be aeris soldier au but I think it would make a better. Idk. Pastiche collection? Because it's rather sad, you know? I don't see the potential for a good outcome there. And I like melancholy, so that's fine, but I doubt I'd want to write it with a beginning and middle and end rather than just use it as a vehicle for weird melancholy aeris who may or may not command WEAPONs.

28. "Is there any part of wars you're surprised no one has picked up on yet?"

Its hard to say what people have and haven't picked up on. I think if I do my job right, when the cards are revealed on the table the prestige will be that they've been on the table the whole time, y'know? That said some readers seem to think that Sephiroth is like.. a good person...

34. "Have you gotten emotional while writing a scene?"

Yes. I'm often in my feelings when I write. Like all of my one shots except for McDonald's was written very in my feelings and I most of the keystone scenes in wars have me like that one jpg where the girl is lying wistfully beside a pool.

That said the emotions usually happen while I'm planning shit in my head because when the time comes to write it its just the usual agony over words

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rosaguard · 4 years ago

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✒️ + aerzora go

✒️ + a ship = summer talks about them. / selectively accepting.

this takes me a long time to get to the point of actually talking about the ship, i’m not sorry.

ah yozora and aeris. i feel like...they scratch an itch that none of aeris ‘canon’ ships ( and even her fanon ships ) do for me: they have depth that’s satisfying to me. obviously, that probably seems like an ‘unfair’ comparison due to the fact that this is roleplay - we’ve essentially created this ship and can do whatever we want. however, i feel like zeri.th and cleri.th at their base level are meant to be very ‘cute’ and tropey ( yes, there’s angst and death but the majority of their interactions can be summed up that way ) which isn’t inherently bad. i’ve grown to like both of these ships despite having my separate issues with them ( although with cle.rith, it was more so its fans than the actual ship itself ). for instance, i don’t like CC aeris or how her original character was undermined in that game. it’s hard for me to see the depth in a ship where i feel like one half of it was essentially watered down / heavily altered to support it ( again, this is just my opinion / how i bluntly feel about it ). overall, between the shipping wars, the constant essays about what is and isn’t canon, and the fact that cl.oti/zeri.th/cl.erith are all extremely common ‘types’ of romances in FF games, etc. it has just made me somewhat...bored of it all despite still liking and writing content for them.

it doesn’t help that aeris, for whatever reason, also isn’t ‘shipped’ as much with other characters outside of clou.d, ti.fa, and za.ck compared to how those three are with other characters so there’s not like...a taste of something else? the next person outside of that trio is probably seph.iroth ( and i’ll admit that i was super into sep.haeris as a teenager and i might still get a little emo seeing fanart of them ) but even then, that was never a hugely popular ship. i think people are also more vocally opposed to it now? although i feel like weirder / even more questionable ships such as sef.ikura and tse.rith that are popular / don’t get as much heat which is...strange. anyway, while sep.haeris was/is a thing, there’s not a lot of depth there either from what i remember as a teen. their relationship is usually written in 1). an au entirely, 2). an OG rewrite where se.phiroth isn’t crazy, 3). a fic where they come back post-death and sep.hiroth has to ‘redeem’ himself, or 4). a fic where seph.iroth is written as he canonically is throughout the OG and their relationship is toxic. this is somewhat reductive but this is usually the categories they’re in and in every one, aeris is typically written more so how she is in CC/AC/KH: innocent, pure, naive, the one who ‘believes’ in seph.iroth, his light, whatever.

aeris is often written as the emotionally supportive one to her partners which is honestly a too common role with many love interests in FF romances. again on its own, it’s fine but it becomes exhausting when it’s a repeated pattern, especially when the male characters are never written to be as emotionally supportive or caring back until like...a female character suffers, is hurt, or literally dies. the point of all this is that it provides a lot of context regarding how i write aeris in her interactions with yozora - some of its intentional / i’m actively aware of it when writing while some of it are things i just kind of realized while writing all of this. for instance, she doesn’t like him at first in my opinion ( and the feeling is probably mutual ) so there isn’t that instant ‘bonding’ process that cleri.th and zeri.th had over like...a span of a day. they have to actually grow to like each other while traveling together - even if it’s just as friends - so that it matters when she dies. i want their relationship to feel ‘earned’ so that when they’re finally in a place where they’re happy, they’ll actually both did the emotional work to get there rather than one side pushing the other to ‘do better’.

i don’t think we’ve ever decided ‘when’ they first officially meet (ex. the OG, remake, some other timeline, etc. ) but for the sake of this post, i’m going to say the remake. i don’t subscribe to the idea that aeris knows everything like seph.iroth does; i think she gets visions like cloud does but is able to better piece things together due to ‘what’ she is. so if her and yozora were to meet in the remake timeline, a timeline where aeris - a naturally guarded person who typically doesn’t tell people things until she has to - is even more guarded and secretive due to actively being aware of the fact that she’s going to die that that’s not going to be a great mix. canonically speaking, one of the few times OG aeris fully opens up to someone by choice is during her last conversation with cloud in his dreams. that conversation basically gets her killed ( sephiroth finds out where she’s going due to his connection with cloud ). basically, there is a real possibility that aeris would leave yozora to take care of meteor / sephiroth without a word; not even giving him that lasting memory of her like with what OG aeris did with cloud - even if she had already figured out that he had began to grow feelings for her.

as terrible for yozora as that might be: i like that.

i like female characters who are good and kind but are also allowed to make shitty decisions, be uncaring at times, etc. because that’s being human. aeris is a complicated person. she has a lot of layers that canon only touches on but will never commit to because they’re boring ( ex. her guarded nature and issues with abandonment, her friendly nature vs her loneliness, how she tends to not reciprocate the energy she gives out to people, how she was literally raised in a lab and has her abusers - that she has to play nice with - constantly stalking her, etc. ). to circle this back to the start, i guess that’s why the fighting over who aeris ‘loved’ in the end, whether it was za.ck or clo.ud, is silly to me. these men....truly don’t know her at all? how could they? she knew clo.ud for literally two weeks canonically and met za.ck when she was like...16. he didn’t even know one of the most important things about her: her own heritage. how can either one of them be the love of her life when they’ve only seen one side of her - a side that she wanted them to see at that?

it might take literal lifetimes but yozora will get to see those different sides of her as unpretty, uncomfortable, and even hurtful as those sides of her may be at times - yet he will choose to love her anyway and she’ll do the same with him. that hits:tm: different.

tl;dr: there is no tl;dr. read it all or keep scrolling.

#verumking #❀ . ━ ❛ voices of the lifestream ❪ asks ❫ .#this is probably rambling as fuck but i don't care. i've had a long day lol #also *rambly. anyway more of a discussion of my thought process when writing content related to them i guess

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hailene · 5 years ago

Text

Perfect Imperfection (3)

Perfect Imperfection| part three (final)

Characters: Jaemin x female lead, Chenle x female lead (the girl will go by the name of Aeri)

Genre: fluff, angst, writer!au, highschool!au

Word count: 5.9 K

Summary: Aeri is a the teenager who writes. Finding inspiration in anything surrounds her, her ideas go wild once she meets the perfect character, Na Jaemin. As a writer becomes obsessive with their favourite character, Aeri grows a weird passion for the bright boy. However, she's so focused on painting Jaemin as perfectly as possible, that she ignores the furry of fiery hair that takes her to night walks and shows her secret places around the town. Despite knowing everything, she forgets that playing with fire means getting burnt. And that sometimes, when we remember to stop, it's too late.

part one 》part two 》part three

There is one thing I might never understand about Zhong Chenle: how even though I am used to analyzing people in silence and figuring out by myself which type of character they are in this big story called life, I haven't figured out who he really is, despite the fact that I've known him for a while now.

And this confusion sticks with me even as he leads me back in the coffee shop we left a few minutes ago.

"Why are we here again?" I ask as he gestures me to sit at the same table, near the window.

I do so, moving quite slowly and trying to figure out why he's doing this.

"I'm sorry." He says but his face didn't look as sorrowful as his words.

"Maybe." I wave him off, slightly annoyed at the memory of his words.

"But," he continues "as the lucky soul who got to peek through your notebook, I must let you know stuff."

I look at him, my eyebrows furrowed in both annoyance and confusion.

"Such as?"

"Such as the fact that you're being obvious and the only reason why the others haven't figured out you have something for Jaemin is because they're close to both of you. It's easy for me though." He shrugs.

"No, the only reason why you know that is because you read it." I snap but he looks unfazed.

He blinks a few times as if I was shooting bullets at him but he was melting them all.

"Why Jaemin?" He asks and I look at him for quite a few seconds before saying:

"You're unbelievable... thought you've figured out I never let anybody ever get in my business when it comes to writing."

He shrugs again.

"I have," he says "but I think I might help you."

"I don't need your help, Chenle." I say but my voice comes out softer than I wanted it to.

"Maybe." He smiles. "But if you're only ever going to write Jaemin's portrayal, you won't ever get a story done... stories need action, right?"

I don't say anything, too annoyed at his control over the situation to come up with any kind of witty remark.

"He needs to make you feel in some certain way for you to be able to write about him... those shivers that you feel whenever he smiles at you are far from enough, honey."

I frown at the last word but as I let my brain process the information, I realize that deep down, he's right. All I have been doing has been writing about Jaemin and creating fake scenarios in my head that never seemed to actually be good enough to be written.

"So what do you suggest?" I ask trying to sound uninterested.

He smiles and I realize I didn't sound enough uninterested.

"Well, we can start with his dark-like-night coffee," he says "so you can get in the mood, you know?"

***

Weeks and months pass like this, my encounters with Chenle being more and more frequent, to the point Hyuck asked me if there was something going on between us. There wasn't. Little did everybody know how big of a help Chenle was to me in writing about the story of Jaemin's character. He was telling me stuff that the older boy was saying at the basketball trainments and little gestures of his, but he was also discretely pinching me whenever my starring was too obvious while we hung out together. The other day, we exchanged notes during class and I was trying so hard to contain my laughter as I was really close to getting detention. He's also made a habit out of sending me memes at ungodly hours, ruining my sleeping schedule, but they were so funny that I couldn't regret it.

Walking out of school, I bump into somebody taller than me, making me slightly stumble backwards.

"I'm so sor-... Jaemin?" I say as I look at the hazelnut-haired boy who looked just as surprised as I was.

We haven't had the chance to see each other in a while and I was genuinely happy to see him now, my heart jumping in my chest, like a bird in a cage. We end up going for coffee as it was almost weekend and none of us had too many assignments to do. We order the usual, hot chocolate for me and iced americano with 2.5 extra shots of espresso for Jaemin- drink which, by the way, tasted even more bitter than it looked like.

We chat for a while, more like making conversation than actually talking about important things, maybe that was also because I was too aware of his presence and of the way the warm lights in the coffee shop made his eyes sparkle.

"Aeri, there's something I wanted to ask you." He says at some point. "I've been thinking about this and I think you're the perfect person to ask for help from... that, of course, if you want to."

"Go ahead." I say, gesturing him to say whatever he has to say.

He shifts a bit in his seat, something a bit unusual for Jaemin, but I let it slide.

"My mom is having this fancy relatives and close friends reunion at our house next weekend and she asked me to bring a friend... she meant to bring my girlfriend, but since I don't have one..."

"So you want me to be your fake girlfriend for a day?" I ask, a bit taken aback by his idea.

He gives me one of his charming smiles and I mentally curse at him for being so annoyingly attractive and for making my heart flutter this much.

"Uh... yeah." He says. "But it's completely fine if you don't want to, it's a stupid idea anyway, I should've-..."

"I'll do it." I say, avoiding my gaze. His mouth goes slightly agape but he slightly shakes his head, in order to get back to his senses.

"Have you just said you...?"

I chuckle my anxiety away.

"Yeah, it's not big deal anyway." I smile.

It is, actually. A huge deal.

"That's... that's great!" He smiles, his face lighting up once again. "I can't thank you enough, Aeri."

"Nah, that's alright." I smile. "So, how fancy should I dress?"

***

A fun fair was the last place I expected we'd go to when Chenle texted me he'd pick me up in 10 minutes. Yet here we were, my notebook stuffed in my bag alongside some pens and a bottle of water. I didn't really like this kind of places but I didn't want to let Chenle know it, he seemed too excited and for once, I didn't want to ruin that.

After a few rides on Chenle's favourite machines, he gets us a double sized cotton candy, both of us deciding it was time to simply sit on a bench and catch our breath. I open my notebook and write down a few words about how fascinated the roller coaster rides made me feel but how I regret screaming the whole time because now my throat was sore. It wasn't that bad. However, I was far from enjoying this whole thing as much as Chenle. The sparks in his eyes seemed to shine even brighter than the colourful neon lights in the amusement park and that was such a pretty sight to see.

"So," he begins, stuffing a piece of pink cotton candy in his mouth "how do you feel?"

I shrug as I write some words in my notebook.

"I don't really know, I think the last ride has brainwashed me." I say and he laughs, some people walking by turning their heads towards the fiery-haired boy.

Because even his laugh was brighter than the whole park.

"Such a shame." He shakes his head. "Did you like it though?"

"Enough much to make me write some pretty cool stuff in here." I say pointing towards my notebook.

He smiles fondly and I feel sparkles of happiness fluttering in my chest at the sight of his bright smile. I should've grown used to it by now, I get to see it every time he takes me places, it's like he's my personal guide (even though the furthest we've been was some opening in the close proximity of our town) and he enjoys his job so much. But I can't seem to get used to how happy these trips make me feel. I note down some words, slowly drifting away from the reality surrounding me. However, Chenle's words make their way to me, making me flinch slightly.

"Have you decided on his name?" He asks and I smile.

"Yeah," I answer "Jem... it's pretty much short from Jaemin but you can also take it as 'gem' which makes me think of bright lights and sparkles and... basically Jaemin..."

A small smile makes its way up to my lifs as I lower my head, as if trying to hide from Chenle, but there was nothing to hide anymore.

"That's a nice idea." I hear him saying. "I guess it can work."

I nod.

"Thanks... you know, you're really helping me a lot in all of this."

It's his turn to nod, with a sweet smile plastered on his lips.

"Yeah," he whispers after I no longer pay attention to him "I guess I am."

***

"You did what?"

"I know you've heard it from the first time and I would sincerely appreciate if you guys stopped acting like deaf grandpas." I say folding my arms over my chest. "Plus it's not such a big deal."

"Yeah, it's only for a day." Yeji adds from the other corner of the room.

"Wait, you knew?" Jeno asks turning to her but she simply shrugs.

"You're still coming to the study night, right?" Chenle asks and I cam literally feel myself mentally face palming in that moment.

"N-no, Chenle, I'm so so sorry! It's at the same night with Jaemin's..."

"That's okay." He says simply and for a while, the thought that he's not mad soothes me.

Chenle is never mad.

"You guys are acting all shocked when the poor girl is meeting Nana's family and she has nothing to wear." Yeji rolls her eyes and I chuckle, despair clearly written across Jeno's face.

"Please don't tell me-"

"Hell yeah, we're going shopping." Yeji smiles devilishly and I can basically see Jeno's soul leaving his body like in the cartoons.

"And you guys are coming." I add, looking at Jeno, Chenle and Renjun, all of them looking devastated by the flash news that we're going to the mall.

"Actually... I can't, I have something else to do for the rest of the day... " Chenle says.

"Oh no, Zhong, you're not running away." Yeji says standing up but he smiles and for a second, I see a dash of exhaustion on his face.

But Chenle is never exhausted.

"It's not like that, Yeji. I'm sorry, I'll see you guys, later."

And with that, he leaves the gym, silence floating in the air for a few seconds, maybe because none of us has ever seen Chenle being so serious. So unlike his usual self.

And then it clicks to me. Chenle is never mad. He is silent. And when Zhong Chenle is silent, the end of the world might as well be close.

***

The fancy party was far from being what I had expected, the atmosphere was far from being as dense as I'd thought it would be. Jaemin's mom was a sweetheart and her eyes sparkled with happiness when she saw me, almost the same way as Jaemin's eyes light up when he's excited about something. The other guests were actually really nice and so unlike the gossip-lover kind of old people that I had imagined.

One of mrs. Na's friends excused herself in order to answer a call while we were talking about the career as a novelist (fun fact: she was miss Kang's aunt and she seemed to share the passion for writing with her niece) and Jaemin suddenly showed up near me, making me slightly flinch.

"Everything alright?" He asks and I nod with a genuine smile on my face.

"To be honest I didn't really expect to enjoy this evening so much." I say.

He smiles and looks at me with his warm glimmering eyes and for a second time seems to stop and the background music, the chatter and the laughter seem to fade away.

"Aw look at them, they're so cute together!" I hear the lady I was talking to earlier saying.

Another woman which I recognize as being Jaemin's grandmother stares at us in awe and I feel my cheeks heating up. I smile awkwardly as I feel Jaemin's hand sneaking up over my shoulders and pulling me closer to him, breath hitching in my throat.

"Yeah, she's the cutest." He says smiling and I slowly lift my head to look at him, searching for any kind of humour on his face.

Did he really say that? Or was I dreaming?

He looks down at my face and the closeness of our faces makes my eyes slightly widen. Maybe he figures it out, because a sweet grin makes its way up to his lips and I feel my cheeks getting hot once again.

"Excuse us for a second..." Jaemin says without taking his eyes off me and pulls me by my left wrist towards the backyard of his house.

We leave the ladies chuckling and giving each other suggestive looks and honestly, I wasn't so sure how I was feeling about that. Once we arrive in the backyard, he lets go of my wrist and looks at me with the same sweet smile that made my knees turn to jelly a few minutes ago. However, I decide to gather up my courage and stand tall because my walls couldn't be broken down so easy, so fast. I needed my cover to be able to write about him. I needed to keep myself in the position of the observer. I couldn't step in the action or things could've gone bad.

"What was that about?" I ask crossing my arms over my chest.

His smile widens as he steps closer to me.

"What did you want it to be?" He asks in a lower tone and my eyes slightly widen again.

This is not Jem. Jem would never act like this.

He chuckles at the sight of my face.

"Nothing, don't worry, Aeri." He says smiling. "There's somebody I don't wanna hurt."

"Whom?" I ask confused.

His smile fades slightly, a glint of surprise crossing his face.

"Somebody who cares deeply about you." He smiles.

I shake my head after my brain proceeds his words.

"No way, Jem, Jeno is my best friend-..."

"I wasn't talking about him." He still smiles, despite the seriousness of the conversation and I can't help but mentally curse at him for making me feel so torn.

Who could possibly care about me so deeply that me and Jaemin being a thing could hurt them?

"Why did you bring me here?" His smile widens once again and he looks at the ground for a second, before looking into my eyes once again.

"To thank you. Like really thank you, if you weren't here, I would probably be sitting in the living room and listening to my uncle's stories about his first car."

I laugh.

"That's alright, I'll always be here if you need anything." I smile.

He shakes his head.

"You shouldn't." He says with a tint of bitterness in his voice.

"Why is that?" I ask.

He looks at me for a few seconds, giving me enough time to admire his perfect features.

"Children, we're serving the cake now!" Jaemin's mom says from behind us and I flinch in surprise.

"We're coming!" Jaemin gestures her and I look at him, disappointed that I might never get my answer.

Sensing that, he simply smiles again.

"Take care of yourself, Aeri."

He says before we get in the house once again.

***

"It was insane. Honestly. I didn't know he would be so similar to the way I created Jem. It was ethereal, the way he looked screamed prince, I swear..." I say as I lay tiredly in my bed, a long sigh leaving my mouth. "And his mom was a total sweetheart, her cooking skills were incredible, for real. I wonder if Jaemin is as good at cooking as his mother. That would certainly be a huge plus to his character to be honest."

The boy sitting on my desk chair doesn't say anything and I roll in my bed to look at him.

"Don't you think so?" I ask as I hug one of my pillows.

The fiery-haired boy looks at me, his eyes lacking the usual glint of happiness that they always seemed to hold. Maybe he was tired after a day of school, as I was too.

"I guess." He sighs. "If it was good enough to make you write, that's nice."

"Yeah, it was... but like, it was more than enough," I say. "I didn't feel like I was playing a role, I felt like I belonged there."

"Don't lose yourself in the story, Aeri." He says on a concerned tone and I sit in my bed, legs crossed, still holding my pillow.

"I won't, but this..." I begin "this is no longer a story, Chenle, this is my reality, Jaemin might-..."

"No, Jem might, Aeri... not Jaemin." He says while standing up. "You have been so obsessed with writing about Jaemin that you forgot which version is real."

"I... didn't forget, what are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about the fact that you should probably stop thinking about Jaemin as your superhero, because he's not Jem." He sighs.

"But-..."

"There is nothing dramatic about Jaemin for you to romanticize, okay?" He says, with a glint of exhaustion in his eyes.

"I'm not romanticizing anything, just because I like Jaemin, it doesn't mean I-..." I stop in midsentence when I realize what I've just said.

Despite the fact that I should be comfortable around Chenle, somehow this topic seems sensitive and definitely not a good choice to talk about now.

"You're not in love with Jaemin, Aeri." He says with bitterness. "You're in love with a lie."

I frown and stand up, crossing arms over my chest.

"And you're saying this because you know so much about how love works." I snap back and he simply shrugs, picking up his back-pack.

"Not your problem." He mutters.

"Hey... hey, I thought you'd at least understand if I told you I had feelings for Jaemin!" I say, feeling rage taking over me at the sudden change in his behavior.

Chenle never rises his voice. Chenle is never grumpy. Chenle is never exhausted. When he is mad, he is silent. Or ignorant. He stops in his tracks and for a second I feel like I might've said the wrong thing, which has never happened to me before around him.

"You thought wrong." He says. "I don't understand you at all."

"Do you really think-..." But before I can finish my question, Chenle leaves my room with big steps, without paying attention to my words.

"Chenle, wait-..." I run after him but before I can catch up, I hear the entrance door slamming and I know he's already gone.

I scream in frustration, as if it could bring him back. He won't come back, I know that for some reason. However, I can't help but be bothered by what has just happened between us because it felt unfair to me. He was unfair to me. He was supposed to support me in this, not tell me what I feel and what I don't.

And maybe there was something more than frustration, something that I didn't want to admit to myself, because I simply didn't want to feel like a bitch, something that made me fall on my knees and cry after my throat went dry from so much screaming. It felt like I'd lost Chenle. But it felt like I had lost a part of myself as well.

***

A few weeks have passed and to be honest, the one I've spent my time the most with has been Donghyuck. Jeno was busy with Yeji since they were (finally) officially dating, Renjun was traveling somewhere in Europe for a school exchange and there was no way I could talk to Chenle. I simply couldn't. Jaemin's mom invited me over for dinner tonight and I felt terrible that I had to decline. It wasn't that I didn't want to go, it was just that I couldn't bring myself to do it, I was feeling guilty for some reason.

That's why I asked Jaemin to meet me after classes today.

"I'm so sorry." I say, looking at the steaming hot chocolate in front of me.

"Don't worry about it." Jaemin smiles. "Mom will understand, that's literally the last thing you should be thinking about now."

I sigh and take a sip from my hot chocolate, hissing when it burns my tongue.

"Are you okay?" I hear Jaemin asking and I wave it off.

"It's just a burn, not even that bad." I mutter.

He chuckles with a spark of bitterness, only making my feeling of guilt grow.

"I wasn't talking about that." He smiles. "I was talking about how you feel."

I look at him, trying to ignore the pang in my chest and the constant feeling that I'm suffocating. I should be alright, I should be happy that I get to hang out with Jaemin. So why am I not?

"Jaemin, why... why did you say that I shouldn't be there for you?" I ask and his smile doesn't even fade.

"Because -..." He pauses and sighs, thinking.

"I... like you." I say out of the blue and I avoid my gaze, without necessarily waiting for a response. "Or at least, that's what... I think..."

I hear him sighing and I look at him once again.

"My mom used to tell me" he begins "that she fell in love with dad because he made her feel alive." He smiles and averts his gaze, looking out of the window of the café for a few seconds.

Then, he looks at me again.

"That's the definition that I've had about love my whole life... and I've started to believe in it more and more lately. But Aeri..."

He gives me one of his sweet smiles, but this time, it is filled with concern.

"...I don't think I'm the one who makes you feel alive."

And that was when I realized that truly, he was not. Because I wasn't sad that I'd been turned down.

I was thankful.

***

Today was the first day of judging for the writing contest and I was disappointed to see that none of the works that I've been given to judge was even close to my expectations. Renjun had warned me that none of the contestants would come close to my talent, but I laughed it off, asking him to stop with the sweet talk. My expectations weren't high, they were decent, but nothing seemed to get me interested. Nothing seemed to make me want to read further and so the whole time felt dull to me.

"I'm seriously going to hit you with a basketball if you keep zoning out any longer." I hear Hyuck saying and I sigh.

"Sorry, I was just... thinking." I say.

"Yeah, I know, the same way you have been doing for the past 16 days, 12 hours and... almost 37 minutes." He says checking his smartwatch.

I roll my eyes and sigh once again.

"I have to finish marking the essays for the writing contest by Thursday and I'm so not in the mood for that." I mutter closing my eyes in exhaustion.

I have been unable to write anything worth reading ever since I fought with Chenle and somehow, everything I've been doing ever since then feels wrong and incomplete. All I can do is focus on judging for the writing contest, even though I couldn't find a real motivation for that anymore either.

"Aeri?" I turn my head to my right and see miss Kang looking at me with her warm smile.

She was wearing a blue silk dress, her dark hair falling nicely in waves on her shoulders. Miss Kang was one of the nicest people I'd ever met and one of the only people ever who could understand my passion for writing. That was one of the reasons why I loved her.

"Oh, hello, miss!" I say standing up from my desk, slightly stumbling on my feet.

"Careful there." She chuckles. "Okay so I believe you're close to finishing your marking these days, but I wanted to show you this essay that came in my set. I'm not pressuring you or anything, I just you to mark this one too. I guess you'll figure out why I'm asking you to do this too. Is that alright with you?" She asks handing me a paper, probably a copy of the essay she has mentioned.

"Of course." I nod, taking the paper.

"That's great." She says smiling widely. "I'll see you later!"

She leaves the class as smoothly as she has entered and as soon as she does that, Donghyuck tries to snatch the paper from my hands.

"No way, nobody is reading these outside the judges, sweetie." I tell him and he rolls his eyes in annoyance.

"Fine, dumbass, as you say..."

The curiosity makes me unable to wait until I get home so after my English class, I take the paper from my backpack and unfold it, taking in the amount of words scribbled on the paper, with a handwriting that felt awfully familiar to me.

"If we run fast enough, maybe time won't be able to catch up with us..."

I lose myself in the words of the essay, being weirdly intrigued by every single line, unlike anything that I had read before while judging.

"...there are so many ways we can see the world and we don't even need to choose one, everyday is a new chance to rewrite it all from a new point of view. We can be whatever we want to be..."

It was speaking to me, weirdly, it felt like it was written for me, I could feel it on a different level and that was scaring me more than anything. Every word, every line, every feeling put on this paper, it all felt familiar. As if I've experienced it too.

"...but after all, we're just going on roller coaster rides, where lights blend and everything shines, where problems fade and we almost lose ourselves. That's alright- because even though the thrill will wash away her memory of me, her eyes will still sparkle. And that's enough, because like that, even time would stop to admire her beauty."

I stare at the piece of paper in my shaking hands, trying to run away from the realization that was becoming clearer and clearer in my head. The handwriting, the lines, the way all the words seemed to be made to be put together like that. It was perfect. But the essay was talking about so much imperfections that lives, our lives had in common. It was a twisted combination of feelings and memories and wild nights spent in funfairs and aquariums, in cafes and libraries, nowhere and everywhere at the same time.

I stand up, taking my back-pack and heading home. I had to finish marking essays and I had to do that now.

***

"Miss, I am sorry, but I can't grade this essay." I say showing miss Kang the paper she gave me a few days ago.

She smiles and not even the cold lights from the empty classroom we were in could take her warmth away.

"I won't ask why. I was actually more curious about your opinion on it, compared to the rest of the essays."

I look at her in exasperation, then at the damned piece of paper.

"It's good.... Actually, no, it's..." I sigh "It's more than good, it's amazing, it speaks so fluently and it shows so many feelings that the reader might even feel like part of it all, it takes you in, casting a spell on your mind and when you finish it, it spits you back to the reality and it just... breaks your heart..." I say, my voice cracking at the end, but miss Kang chooses to ignore it, nodding in agreement instead.

"I asked you to read this because the other judges and I have been thinking to give this essay the first place." She explains. "So what do you think?"

I feel tears stinging my eyes. Experiences that I have felt, things I have been through, put on paper, are getting the first place.

"I-I guess that's the best choice..."

"Aeri?"

I look at her and she smiles sadly.

"Do you know the other reason why I asked you to read this?" She asks softly and I shake my head. "It's because... I saw a small part of you in it, a tint of your writing style in it, a spark of your aura. Something... something that made me believe you'd connect with this better than anybody."

I turn my head away in order to wipe my tears away. The pain in my chest was almost suffocating and all I wanted to do was run home and cry my eyes dry under a blanket.

"I think I was right." She says and I sniff slightly, trying to ignore the effect that the essay has had over me.

And it wasn't just the essay. It was its owner as well.

I find myself walking towards the basketball pitch, hoping that I could find whoever I was looking for. If I was in love with Jaemin, my heart wouldn't hurt this much right now. If I had feelings for anybody else, I wouldn't feel like somebody ripped my chest open. How could I be wrong, how could I possibly be wrong, when I am so used to analyzing everybody around me and foresee all the possible cases? How could I lie to myself like this?

A basket ball rolls down to my feet and I pick it up, looking in front of me, only to be met with the sight of a mess of a fiery hair, staring back at me. I feel tears stinging my eyes and I step towards him, leaving only two steps between him and I. After inhaling deeply, I throw him the ball and he catches it perfectly, with his incontestable basketball skills. He dribbles it a few times and I could've sworn my heart was beating almost as loud as the thumps of the ball.

"Why did you write that?" I ask silently, trying to look into his eyes.

He wasn't confused. He knew all too well what I was talking about and that only made more tears gather behind my eyes. I knew I couldn't be wrong. Not this time. Not regarding this.

"I felt like it." He answers, shrugging and I feel like screaming, frustrated at the fact that he can control his emotions so well, unlike me.

"You felt like it? You f-felt like it, Chenle?" I let out a small whimper. "You wrote about all of that just because you felt like it?"

He shrugs and I take a deep breath, trying to calm myself. I was the wrong one and still I was the one asking for explanation from him when it should be the other way.

"I... Miss Kang asked me to read your essay because she thought it's the best one out of the whole competition. She asked me to grade it. I... I couldn't." I sigh. "Maybe I'm selfish to find myself in it so much but... I do? All the late night walks and evenings spent in fun fairs or reading comics on the floor of the library... we d-did that, didn't we? We did all of those, hell we did much more... w-why couldn't I understand earlier..."

"You confessed to Jaemin." He speaks and my eyes widen.

Of course Jaemin told him.

"There was... nothing to confess." I say softly. "I thought I had feelings for him, but... I guess you were right. It has never been him."

He looks at me and sighs, before diverting his gaze.

"Look, Aeri, it's really not my business, I shouldn't have said those things,but..." He sighs, shaking his head. "Thank you for reading my essay-..."

"Chenle!"

He looks at me, a little bit startled by my loud voice.

"A-All this time..." I start "it has been you." I sniff. "Not Jaemin, not Jem, not any other imaginary prince charming, not anybody else. It has always been just you. You... make me feel so happy and... and alive... I have always taken you for granted and realized how important you were to me just after you left... B-Because I'm freaking stupid a-and... all I know is to create scenarios in my head and drown in them until I can no longer tell what's fantasy and what's real."

He looks at me but I can't figure out his expression because of the amount of tears in my eyes.

"I am s-so sorry, Chenle." I try to say but my voice comes out as a whisper. “You have all t-the rights to hate m-me...”

"I wrote that because you inspire me to always do better and never give up on my dreams, you... you work so hard for yours and you..." he lets out a heavy breath. "You make me feel. Everything. I think... that's how I could write that essay, I was thinking about you the whole time. All the feelings that I put in it... you made me feel them. Aeri..."

I look at him, quickly wiping the tears that were rolling on my cheeks already.

"I'm in love with you."

I feel myself taking a deep breath and letting out the sobs that I have swallowed for so long. I feel two arms engulfing me into a warm hug and the familiar scent of soap and mint taking over my senses. I bury my head in Chenle's chest as he caresses my back gently as if I was a frightened cat. I wasn't far from being one though.

"Is it that bad?" He asks gently and I chuckle but it comes out more as a chocked sob and Chenle laughs.

Loud, bright, genuinely. Exactly how I love him.

"Okay gross, you're ruining his T-shirt, crybaby." I hear Hyuck saying behind me and my friends' laughter following after.

"You're next, fucker!" I say in a dry voice and Chenle laughs once again.

He was not perfect. He was far from being perfect. But somehow all the imperfections that were part of him made him be perfect in my eyes. He was more than what I deserved to get and I was more than thankful to the heavens for dragging him into my life. I had always tried to be perfect, to write, to act, to speak perfectly. But he has showed me that there's beauty in imperfection. There is perfection in imperfection.

And he is the living proof for that.

~The End~

A/N: It’s been SO long, I am so sorry! Anyways, I hope you enjoyed this lil story. Thank you so much for reading it, it really means a lot to me!♥ I would like to write short stories like this one in the future as well, what would you guys want to read about?

hailene x

#nct fanfic #NCT #nctdream #nct angst #jaemin #chenle #Jeno #renjun #JISUNG #kpop #highschool #haechan #donghyuck #fanfiction #angst #writer #au

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