#(I get in the red I do panic
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We all know the semi-canonical ‘all the Robins know to hide/duck inside of Batman’s cape, even as adults’ thing.
We also know that Danny ‘is LITERALLY a ghost’ Fenton sucks at remembering his own intangibility while ALSO forgetting to look ahead of him.
All I’m saying is, Danny Fenton (or Phantom, if you’d really like) would absolutely SLAM into Batman on accident while running on roof tops and Bruce ‘Brooding Instinct’ Wayne doesn’t even think twice about letting the kid hide and scanning around for danger before there’s a record scratch of ‘wait who tf is this?’ kicks in.
#dp x dc#dpxdc#dc x dp#dcxdp#danny phantom crossover#listen I’m just SAYING#my initial thought is Fenton bc dark hair and how most of the robins have had dark hair#Danny isn’t even necessarily running from danger. he just got into parkour and forgot how to stop his momentum#I mean you CAN have him running from something. give this an ACTUAL plot#but honestly I just think it’d be a fun little setup#Danny peaks out and. in panic. goes#hi we’re the council of the dead. we’ve been trying to contact you and yours about your extended warranty#*extended life warranty or what have you#Danny hasn’t even gotten death vibes from anyone yet so now he has to wing it#yeah hi… uh. Batman sir. if that’s your preferred moniker?#right so we’re basically the ghost irs and you owe death taxes?#yeah you know the saying. death and taxes. guarantees of life. haha.#which in this case means you owe money bc you aren’t dead yet. probably. idk I uh. JUST got the job .#anyways ohhhh hi yep you’re. red hood. yeah so. mm. yeah we definitely need to get you to the ghostly dmv#it’s the same as a regular dmv but people have actually been bored to death in there#(meanwhile Batman is like WAIT IS THIS SMALL CHILD DEAD?!)#(SURE WHATEVER IM RICH HOW DO I FIND A GHOST ACCOUNTANT AND MORE IMPORTANTLY DO YOU RESPECT GHOST ADOPTIONS?)
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I'm rewatching all the Marvel Defenders shows on Netflix and as much as I mock the MCU now, I need non-Marvel fans to understand that I was and still am a fan of "Daredevil fighting the gentrifying assshole who bought out the police force because ACAB both as a lawyer and vigilante of the community" and "Jessica Jones fighting the man who mind controlled her into doing unspeakable things and forming a community of fellow survivors and allies while dealing with PTSD in a range of both healthy and unhealthy ways" Marvel. God I love these idiots they carried so hard
#vio.txt#mcu#marvel#jessica jones#daredevil#also the two of them induced so much bi panic in me. also gender envy. jessica jones is one of the few women i get gender envy fron#the iron fist and luke cage shows were...more mid but still leagues above current marvel shows#like. yes be anti-mcu but these were masterpieces#and yes this is why i was so pissed about them putting daredevil in she hulk and trying to make him iron man 2.0#like! yes hes suave and charming but thats bc its his lawyer job!! he works in a law firm he and his friends started to serve his community#he is NOT 'i am rich and better than u' charming. he is 'i learned how to talk fancy for my degree and i have empathy' charming#and not bringing the other guys over either???? bruhhh#marvel really cancelled the best things they did on the screen#matt murdock my original red and black round glasses wearing sadboy what did they do to you#also!! can i mention that these shows had such better representation than nowadays marvel#murdock's actor doing extensive research on blind motility for the role#jessica and trish's friendship and how trish immediately believes jess about kilgrave#the whole!!! unique community feel of harlem and in luke's bar#hogarth whos both jessica's employer and foggy's boss in later seasons being a lesbian and having Real Marriage Issues#and also being a conplex and kinda shitty person#iron fist was....eh but that's why it was the worst one lmao#OH YEAH HOW COULD I FORGET MY GIRL KAREN#karen page getting a whole storyline in s1 about her dealing w ptsd and then getting fleshed out backstory and her own adventures#like ok it was kinda weird in daredevil that she dated like every guy bc she was the female lead 💀#but even then foggy and matt and her figuring their shit out like adults. like they shot their shots and it didnt pan out. still besties th#disney would never allow such good writing in current times#but a boy can wish
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Its gonna b a hot minute before i have the energy for this one (warthogs my be-fucking-loathed) to be done but in the meantime have a scribbly work in progress :3
#the reds the feds and wash#rvb#my art#batsy art#dooo i wanna tag everyone#yea fuck it#rvb donut#rvb locus#rvb sarge#rvb wash#rvb agent washington#rvb lopez#franklin delano donut#samuel ‘locus’ ortez#agent washington#lopez the heavy#rvb oc#anton pavoz#necoda ‘neko’ micce#rvb oc: the clovers#fucking idiots i love them#kimball’s line about how the guys are getting moved around a lot -> roadtrip#locus’ convienently off screen mongoose bc i refuse to add another vehicle im already mad i wanted to do something with the warthogs#theres a second panel that will stay secret until im done#as a treat#my brain is torn between fuck it i wanna share my wip bc it’ll keep me motivated and dear god no one can no i have a PROCESS#like its fine its not that deep but ough#if this vanishes later my stupid brain panic won ✨#until then enjoy some scribbled reds
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Me, doing a rough estimate of The Antithesis of Magic word- and chapter count and ending up somewhere with 50 chapters and >100k words like— 👁️👄👁️
#what have I gotten myself into#like#I can’t wait to write it#but my commitment issues are collectively screaming right now#internal panic#we’ll get through this guys#I’m going to see this through even if it kills me#this fic is HAPPENING one way or another#it’s gonna be a long ride but we’re doing it#anti Robin#the antithesis of magic#jason todd#batfamily#dick grayson#batfam#bruce wayne#robin#red hood#tim drake#fic#fanfiction#ghost talks#Batman#fic rec
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i think the diamond dogs should play improv games just bc it would amuse me, an ex theater kid, specifically
#ted and beard ofc are reading each others minds#trent is shockingly good at it but only when he forgets to be self conscious#also see: he does both best and worst with ted (best when he's not being self conscious#worst when somehow the prompt gets too touchy or 'romantic' bc Crush Crush Crush Brain Panic)#(please the image of ted in character hugging him or something and trent just. red. brain crashed. no longer improving just frozen. barely#manages to recover and even then it was not subtle. unclear if ted is a) genuinely oblivious b) teasing him and thinks trent knows that#c) something else(??) )#roy is too stiff most of the time but if he gets really into it he gets REALLY into it.#best way to get this result is to involve phoebe or another child#higgins did community theater at some point and is the one teaching them all the games. beard also seems to have done intense research#but higgins is the one with EXPERIENCE#not that i think beard and ted couldn't have done an improv duo in college or something but in this scenario they did not#nate surprisingly is pretty good at it once he gets into it like it takes him a second but#then he's like. really getting into it and he's very quick on his feet#new way to go mad with power (affectionate): the rush you get when you make the perfect snap back comedic line/acting choice#also while trent is so good paired with so many of them i think he and nate would be a hilarious duo. they're SO funny.#they complement each other well and are both quick & clever#esp if it's about a mutual interest (although one of them taking the lead on something else like nate and music while the other plays off t#em is also good) but like#please i just had the iamge of them basically doing a bit where they're like. those mean old gay muppets in the theater?#like trent and nate improv duoing as some bitchy reviewers just going back and forth and it's so FAST and SO funny#beard records it and posts it somewhere and it goes viral.#god don't even get me started on the idea of some sort of official richmond social media/the gang posting random clips on social media#bc the ideas i have are so funny.#also largely trent centric but what do you want from me okay i'm just a little slut.
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shoutout 2 this person in my class who i can tell wants 2 talk 2 me really bad but instead of doing that whenever she has the chance she'll talk 2 whoever else is around and ignore me entirely unless im mentioned by name
#bruh lmao#so awkward. say something you dingus lol#ik you wanna talk 2 me so bite the bullet already#gyatt#spacie spoinks#literally. she was having a conversation with my partner for the project im doing. and like#heres the thing#if im not invited into conversation i usually dont participate#im like a vampire like that#and so like. after they're done conversating she'll just kind of. stand there. this has happened twice now#like dude sdkfjshlkdfj#im not upset by this behavior i have very awful social patterns as well and have been thru this (i am autistic)#am i gonna hafta say something. lol#probably#''hey bro whats up with you. i dont mean like how are you doing. i mean like. whats wrong with you.''#cant say that its not funny when you say it irl only when the ppl you're talking with know you're not being mean 😭#also like. this person has been staring at me lol#which like. makes me flustered so whenever she's around i panic and my face fucking turns red its god awful#for awhile it made uhh. my paranoia get really bad im ngl!!#its already bad when it comes 2 being around strangers but this like made it REALLY bad for a few weeks#im more calm now tho. rational brain won over and im chillin#i gotta work up the courage 2 say something b4 the semester is over or this is gonna bother me for the rest of my life sfkjsdhflkjs#i dont wanna put her on the spot#the only time i see her is when im in class#and . doing that interaction in front of ppl. i dont wanna embarrass her ksjfskjd
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think I figured out why I've been in a full trauma trigger state for the last week+ and iiiiiiit is embarrassing
it's because I went on a nice date that I enjoyed
and in the background without even TALKING TO ME ABOUT IT my brain decided to start freaking the fuck out about the inevitability of abuse and the essential harm I do by existing in the world. but like. in the background. to the degree that I have at most been vaguely aware that that's even a thought process I was having let alone that it was what was distressing me.
but I have laid out some timelines of when I entered 24/7-panic-attack mode and it lines up precisely to going home after a nice date. for fuck's sake.
trauma is stupid and emotions are dumb. and if trauma shit is going to fuck up my whole week my brain could at least have the good grace to tell me what I'm upset about.
#red said#the reason it's embarrassing is that it has genuinely been REALLY bad this week#i very nearly ended up hiding under my desk at work. 4 different people have asked if I'm doing ok#i was so dizzy and spaced out that it took me 15 minutes to start a 30 minute meeting#whereupon i dropped the same pen six times in about 30 seconds#also my wrist has been hurting me so fucking bad it's been in a brace for 2 days. which is. inexplicably. a consistent anxiety symptom.#now this might not SOUND like a full on panic attack but the thing to understand is i spent enough of my childhood having them#that i am like. 60% effective at suppressing the obvious symptoms and powering through#and i just get left with the numbness and dizziness and mental incapacity#but the flip side is that they don't go AWAY they last literal days#anyway it's been a wee while since i felt this bad. I'm hoping now I've identified what is going on i might be slightly less AAARGH tomorro
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funniest thing that ever happened when we were playing botw was my sister was playing and she had made it up to the top of the tower in hyrule field (the one surrounded by guardians) and was looking down at the guardians through a slot in the like railing and i was like "you should shoot the guardian" because i thought they were out of range and so she shot the guardian in the eye with an arrow and it came alive and immediately hit link with a laser and link instantly died ragdolled and fell through the slot and miphas grace activated and my sister immediately teleported away while mipha was still doing her thing. and i was just laughing so hard.
#its just the image of link limply falling to the ground miphas ghost around him then turning into tendrils of blue light. i wish i had#filmed it. but there was no way i couldve predicted it would happen i was living in the moment#after i finish minish cap i will finish botw it has been over a year...im sorry daruk i left you hanging (when we stopped i had just entere#vah rudania)#though i might do naboris first bc . i dont want to fight thunderblight last when it has even more hp thats scary.#(weve already done vah ruta and vah medoh)#its kind funny in totk i got like all of the towers right away (although the one on mt lanayru was a struggle bc#i did not have enough cold protective stuff but i was just scaling the mountain out of pure spite)#one of the gerudo desert ones i also didnt have any heat protection so i was just trying to do the thing while link was just taking damage#anyways but in totk i got all the towers i think b4 we did any main quest stuff but then in botw#there were some towers that i just. i tried but i didnt get until i had revalis gale lol. shout out revalis gale.#anyways speaking of funny things in botw totk the other day i was playing totk and i was#i put link in a christmas outfit (dyed the rito shirt and pants and the cap of the wild red)#and made a sled to attach to my horse so link could be santa. and i was trying to make it to rito village#but the bridge on the map was smaller in real life than it looked on the map and the horse refused to walk on it but i kept trying to force#him to inch forward to try and make it across. and then my horse CLIPPED THROUGH the bridge and started FREE FALLING#and in a panic i teleported straight back to the stable and took out another horse as fast as i could. the horse was fine but i did#go to malanya and cook him some food to upgrade my horse immediately afterwards lol#botw lowkey traumatized me bc when i was playing twilight princess i did not use epona as much as i could because i was afraid of bringing#her into danger. and even though i logically knew that she cannot die in twilight princess the years of playing botw still had alarm bells#ringing. but like why do the horses have to die in botw totk...come on...#they dont even disappear the corpse just stays there to let you stew in your guilt!! like the livestock on farms and in stables#cant get hurt! so why can your horses :(
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i know i said i was going to bed but oh my god the cramps are unbearable tonight my tummy hurts so bad I need cuddles and coddling and gifts from my blorbos stat
#nat.txt#menstruation for ts#who do you think would be totally unbothered abt running the red light btw#I think all of them would#some of them just want to help (diluc and thoma)#some of them think it’s cute how whiny you get because it’s gross don’t do that but also it feels so good#(ayato n kaeya)#some of them smell blood and it makes their instincts go insane (tighnari n gorou)#some of them simply Do Not Care.#itto fucks u on ur period and then sees the blood and internally panics bc he forgot abt it and thinks HE hurt you#not sfw text
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devastatingly tired. halfway through writing my presentation.
#might just say fuck it and do the rest in a panic tomorrow#sleep is important and I have NOT been getting enough of it#I had to have screaming arguments with TWO familymembers in my dreams last night. that shit is exhausting#but brrrrrr my subject is honestly SO COOL#queer feminist podcaster talking about Astrid Lindgren and Pippi what's not to love#the hardest part is not getting neck-deep into my concept of the manic pixie dream child and parenting according to jesper juul#pitting red-headed orphans against each other and infodumping ahout the world masterpiece theater#i get SOME of that. but well. Not all of it#chaos rambles
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life really just loves to drop kick me down the stairs sometimes
#personal#have been trying to do this to get my life more in order#like getting my medical testing and records#and applying for financial assistance to get out of the red#and every single thing has just not worked or gone wrong#i found out in order to apply for financial assistance for bills i have to have proof of food stamps to fast track it#easy right? no. i forgot i changed my name through the benefits system to my chosen name#my chosen name that does not match my legal name#my legal name that is attached to the accounts i'm applying to financial assistance to#and in order to change your name you have to call#which i tried and got transferred and put on hold so long they closed#so then i decided to order grubhub instead of going out to eat cause its raining and im now emotionally exhausted#just to have grubhub “refuse” my card#except when i called my cardholder number it listed SIX CHARGES OF THE ORDER#the order that is not on grubhub or on the restaurant (we called both)#and the second they went on their system to try and figure out why the charges were there#(which they were only on my cardholder not on my bank account)#the cardholders entire system went down#and now im just waiting for it to go back up to call back#but i did have an actual panic attack because if i can't get that figured out immediately thats legit over $200 worth of charges#and now i'm literally so fucking hungry cause any energy/fuel i had left went into my panic attack#oh! also forgot to mention that i was finally able to pick up a copy of my medical records from my childhood doc!#which i've been trying to get for like 2 months and shit just kept getting in the way (transportation/money for the records/limited hours)#got the thumb drive home#booted it up to the encrypted password page aaaaaand#the password doesn't fucking work#so now i have to get back to their office to figure out what the actual password is#i literally am so done with today i just want to phase out of existence forever please
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Dangit big money friend I know which blog is yours I just can’t find it or remember the url n can’t find you in the DMS I kNOW I’ve talked to you (adhd memory fog promise I got that big respect)—- but I can’t say Paypal names allowed in fear of deadnames. YOU COME GET ART FROM ME POSTHASTE. hell I’ll make physical art and MAIL IT TO YOU. Your generosity knows no bounds and I hope to share the love with the energy it provides me to SURVIVE.
Note to self: I should make an art piece about the Wealth of Having Community.
#me.#(you essentially just replaced my uncle for the month which is. so comforting.#(for me and for him#(letting him know I’m taking care of#(feels like it’s always been a fear of people who take care of me that I can’t— FIND HELP—- i prommy to them I’ll try my hardest#(either by loving a strong community or by making due by little art pieces#(I grew up homeless I struggle to even see ‘trouble’ as trouble sometimes#(I get in the red I do panic#(but not eating not buying anything not doing anything that’s not free—- that’s my childhood#(I can SURVIVE IT#(but bank red scares me cause it’s Persistent and always appears when you’re least able to attend it (ie: no money?? lETS CHARGE YOU MORE!!#(sniff#(Good people get mentioned to my church lady friend#(she’s. nice. but she has the Christian values of ‘if ur good- good things will happen’ ie: YOU NEED TO EAARRNNN GOODNESS#(usually by working hard#(but lookit this. I do work. I don’t kill my self over it tho. and I spend the rest of my energy on people I care about#(if I had money I’d always be giving it away lord knows I did in college oof#(could’ve saved more if I didn’t help all my friends w their problems but#(that’s how the rich get rich. they in it for themselves.#(*I am rich in relations* so hrmPh#(**rambles further** also spoke to my friends about how the suburbs are subpar communities cause u can’t run businesses in em#(no churches no stores no repairs. cause you can kick someone out of a house but not out of their BUSINESS LOCATION.#(but also cause it risks creating a community you can’t control. becomes self sufficient. doesn’t require capitalism selling them shit.#(when they can share trade and gift. ugh. beautiful times.
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Well that was the roughest work shift of my life. Y'all should send in fluffy stuff to my inbox, I need some positivity 😔
#highlights of the shift:#the entire studio being on a waitlist with over fifteen names on it (aka three hours)#and all five of us having to RUN#because some jackass was calling to get our cars towed#then me and a coworker having a panic attack thirty minutes later#someone yelling at me#my coworker dropping glass and just breaking down while looking at it#my shift being four hours longer than normal and getting to do the same the next day#having to repark my car only to have a car BLOCKING MY WAY#having to yell at the landlord for my coworker#all of us going delirious over milkshakes and giggling over anything because we we're so out of it#three of us sitting behind the counter to hide from customers#me about to throw hands at someone#finishing yhe shift only for us to realize we had to do something which took an extra thirty minutes#and us just....crying#the unison hug was a banger tho#i forgot how great hugs are 💀#anyway i have a headache#code red
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Okay all -- few quick thoughts about the Elon Muskifying of the government, especially the takeover of the Treasury and associated financial data for every single US citizen and organization, that we are learning about in detail today.
Don't panic. This sounds bad, because it is bad. It's really, really bad. It's outrageously fascist bad. But we've still gotta take a deep breath and get through it.
This is the kind of shock-and-awe exercise of untrammeled fascist power where they are absolutely counting on gleefully terrorizing, paralyzing, and stunning you into mounting no resistance, or just giving up and giving in. They are literally live-tweeting it in real time and boasting about all the access and influence they have right now. They want you to know about it and feel like you can't do anything, so you might as well let it happen.
We have to show them that's not true.
TIME TO MAKE SOME NOISE. Because it's Sunday night, I've gone ahead and contacted my state Attorney General and both senators by email (but come Monday morning, we should all be calling). Here is the email that I wrote to my AG:
Dear Mr. [AG],
As you will be aware, today (February 2, 2025) the Trump administration has granted wide-ranging access to sensitive US Treasury data, including the personal and private information of [state] citizens, to Elon Musk's so-called "Department of Government Efficiency." Musk is an unelected private citizen who has no legal right to access this data, and is engaging in extensive intimidation and coercion to fulfill his personal and harmful ideological agenda. The present and material harm that this causes to US citizens, [state] residents, and basic laws of government, privacy, and financial security is direct, unconscionable, and actionable. I strongly urge you, in your capacity as [state] Attorney General, to file direct suit against the Trump administration, Elon Musk, the "DOGE" office, and any identifiable individuals who have taken part in this action, in order to protect consumer data, citizen privacy, and basic faith and trust in government.
All the best,
[Qqueenofhades]
Short! To the point! Doesn't waste time, tells him what I want him to do, how Elmo's nonsense directly harms the residents of my state, and why he should take action to stop it! And frankly, given how on-the-ball blue-state AGs have been thus far, they're probably already working on it. You are very welcome to copy-and-paste this message and fill in your AG's last name and your state as appropriate. Super easy to do. Takes five minutes. Call tomorrow.
If you are in a red state, your voice is particularly important right now. The Trumpsters are counting on and are even emboldened by blue state pushback, but you really need to make it start coming from Republican strongholds. Congressional Republicans will only feel the slightest amount of unease about docilely enabling this BS when it starts threatening their own personal power. Hit them where it hurts.
Other lawsuits are coming. Marc Elias, Democratic lawyer extraordinaire, is well aware of this situation and has noted on Bluesky that more lawsuits are in the works. He often wins his cases. This does not mean that you shouldn't loudly make noise elsewhere, but please remember that this is one of those 24-hour periods where, as noted, they are counting on demoralizing you with a nonstop blizzard of bullshit. It does not say anything about how this will play out long-term or the opposition that can and will be mobilized to stop it.
Once again: courage. Take the small steps that you can do today. Then take a breath and get off social media for a little while. Try to take the long view. One step at a time, we will get through this.
Courage.
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I need people to understand i am not ignoring them on purpose (╥﹏╥)
I just give myself a little time to mentally prepare opening the text/message
Because opening them feels like jumping off a cliff
when really or should be more like ripping off a bandaid
The issue is that sometimes i give myself tooo much time and I wind up doom scrolling
And suddenly it's been an hour ( or a day ) since I've received said message
#Sometimes it's actually because i can't think of a response#So for instagram I've resorted to reacting to each individual message with an emoji#But then i panic#Because what if the person thinks I'm just spamming reactions and not actually responding??#So then instead of a red heart I'd go and find a different heart#And then i panic and have to search up what the different color hearts mean#Because what if one had a secret meaning and the person looks it up and thinks I'm telling them something I'm not???#So if your spammed with emojis by me#And you can't figure out what it means#Just think of it as a cat brining you a mouse or some other obscure thing they do to show they care#Because i genuinely get so happy when i get messages#I just don't know how to express myself#So i try to jam it into emojis#I really need to stop making what i write in the tags longer than the actual post#sighhhh
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Honestly my curls are helping me keep my hair long. Part of me wants to cut it again because sometimes they give me dysphoria, and because short hair is just easier to deal with, but I’m a little afraid of being visibly queer right now (I live in a very red state) and longer hair helps me look more like a cis woman so I don’t know if or when I’ll feel safe cutting it short again.
But I’ve got BPD and yknow, impulsive hair cutting is part of the package. But every time I almost pick up the scissors and attack, I stop and think, ‘wait. Do my curls need refreshed? Maybe I just feel gross because they’re flat and stretched out now’ then I wash my hair and my curls are bouncy again and oh look at that, I don’t want to cut my hair, actually.
I guess the solution to my impulsive hair change has always been ‘embrace curls + take a shower, bitch’ this whole time and I had no idea
#I used to also dye it impulsively but i dont do that anymore#I found a color i love and that apparently everyone else loves too because everyone complimented it over the holidays#It’s been red for two years or so now but this Specific Shade is My Color now#just wish i didnt have to mix two different shades to get it but at least the dye is cheaper than when i would use manic panic
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