rana-fanfic submitted to caretaker-au:
Hello there! I haven’t seen this website for quite a while and omg I never knew the series has been completed!
I admire all your hard work and dedication. The bittersweet-ish ending is so touching :)
I hope my little drawing of Chara is shown properly, as this is the first time submitting my art.
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okay so i saw that post that said "to be loved is to be changed, but in a horrific and unasked for transformation" and this is so snotacon both sides to me.
I mean, think about it. Otacon can't *kill* someone when Snake meets him, and that's true in two ways. Yeah, physically he's a spindly litte nerd who literally couldn't hurt someone if his life depended on it, but he couldn't do it mentally either. He designs weapons. That's a far cry from actually *using* them. He's a pencil pusher who wanted to build giant robots and was willing to believe that MG Rex wouldn't actually be used.
How long do you think *that* lasted, living, working with a mercenary? At what point do you think it sunk in that if he wanted to actually achieve anything with Philanthropy he was going to have to be okay with lethal force being involved?
Surely we don't think everything was non-lethal up to the tanker? I mean, he has to explain the tranqs work at the beginning of the mission, so it's probably new to him, right? So what were they doing before that? And they don't ask themselves if they should pull out when it becomes apparent that lethal force may be necessary, so clearly these won't be the start of Philanthropy's body count.
So when was the point that he resigned himself to the fact that he was going to have to be a lot closer to death and direct killing than he ever had been before? Did Snake insist on having final judgment off the bat? Did Otacon try to convince him that they needed to do it non-lethally, did they run a mission, maybe even a few come off clean, only for something to go terribly wrong? Did they get out by the skin of their teeth? Did Snake have to kill someone, and Otacon get upset by this first death? And did they have an argument where Snake points out that he is the one that has to pay the price for Otacon's personal mission against killing?
:)
But that's all so obvious. Killing is bad, etc.
What about Snake?
I think the idea of caring for anyone is scary to him. Especially the extent to which he cares about Otacon.
I mean, half of his utility is in the fact that he just doesn't give a shit about himself, and has nobody left that gives a shit about him. He doesn't have anything to hold him back from giving 110% to the mission. If he dies, he dies. What does he care? He's a washed up alcoholic with PTSD previously known only to shrimps.
And he clearly values his utility. Even in 4, it's how he refers to himself. "An old killer." What use is he if he's concerned about whether he'll make it home in one piece.
When do you think that sinks in to him? Do you think was the first time Otacon told him to drop the mission and get back safe when things took a turn? Do you think he'd ever been in a situation where someone cared more about his life than whatever they were sending him to do? Do you think Kaz even pretended to genuinely care about his safety in the field? Forget Campbell, that's right out, he couldn't even let Snake be as he's fucking dying. Do you think he tried to finish it out first, only for Otacon to beg and scream at him that he was serious?
Or do you think it was when he got hurt, badly hurt, and he sees Otacon sitting over him at night, making sure he's okay, changing his bandages, and out of the corner of his eye he sees a hand wipe away tears, or hears a quiet sniffle, because Otacon realized how close he was to losing Snake.
Or maybe comms get cut unexpectedly during a shootout, and he gets sidetracked, held up somewhere, makes it back to the rendezvous point just under the wire, and Otacon is bawling because he really thought he lost Snake for good this time.
Do you think Snake realizes that at first? Do you think he's too obtuse to realize the tears are over him? Are from fear for him?
At what point do you think he realizes that the numbness he's fostered, that's been intentionally fostered in him (remember, he's the "Cipher-backed son", he's been moved from foster family to foster family more times than he can count, made intentionally to feel disposable, for the sake of creating a perfect soldier) has been replaced with this new pain, this fear, not even for himself, but for Otacon, for the gaping hole he realizes he'll leave in Otacon's life if something's to happen?
At what point do you think Snake realized that he'd turned a regular civilian into a mercenary, in mind if not body?
At what point do you think Otacon realized he'd fundamentally taken a US military asset and broken it over his knee?
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if dorian didn't show up, do you think louis would have shot minnie?
I do. I know some people think either he wouldn't have or he would've missed so that's why the writers had him shoot Dorian instead, but mmmmmm no, I don't personally think so. I like to think that if he had taken the shot, his shaky hands would've caused him to shoot her fatally.
Mostly because I'm already so normal about the fact that of the Ericson crew, Marlon and Louis are the only ones with a body count. Well, that we know of, but shown to us in the game, at least. Plus, we know it's Louis' first kill.
Like yeah, Clementine and AJ become part of the crew and they have bigger body counts, and if we're counting indirect kills caused by actions, then Tenn has a count... and I guess everyone has blood on their hands for blowing up the boat... but I'm talking about killed directly with a weapon like....... I lied, I'm not normal about that at all, Louis and Marlon are the ones who have killed someone in Louis' route. I'm also not normal about the fact that Louis kills Dorian and then even as he's clearly in shock, he tries to go with Clementine to get AJ, and then later on when they talk about it, he says it feels like bile but not quite and he's glad he has it in him to do it.... listen, listen, listen... I'm obsessed with that.
Anyway, so if Louis shot Minerva, I think he would've accidentally killed her and can you imagine? He's already enough of a mess after killing the woman who pinned him down and tried to cut his finger off [or succeeded] but he knew Minerva, they were friends before the twins were taken. Even Violet couldn't kill her even though that would've been the smarter thing to do, and we know thanks to meta knowledge that killing her would've saved lives, but Violet couldn't, and I don't think Louis would intentionally either.
Speaking of Violet, if Louis killed Minerva, I hate to think about what that would've done to Vi. I think she might've actually left at that point, like what was planned before it got changed to her being burned. I don't think she would've attacked Louis over it, though, like yeah she attacked Clementine in the cell but Louis? I don't know, but I don't think so just because it's Louis and he'd be a mess about it anyway.
Though if he did kill her, it would be a neat parallel to draw... y'know, because Louis forgave AJ for killing Marlon even though he was pissed and heartbroken, and Violet was annoyed with him the entire time... but could she ever forgive Louis for killing Minerva? Y'know? We already have a similar parallel with AJ shooting Tenn, but still.
If Clementine killed Minerva in that moment, though, then I could see Violet attacking her since in her eyes, Clem proved her right.
So yeah, I get why they added the Dorian kill to his route. It adds another compelling element to Louis as a character, but we also need Minerva alive for episode 4; Louis can't kill her, he can't miss, and he's not going to stay with her because we need Violet to stay on the boat and him to be on shore for all routes.
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