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moamidzyism · 10 months ago

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the seven stages of you and i (c.sb)

ʚ♡⃛ɞ when you first met soobin, you knew he was going to play a lead role in your life. you were going to make sure of it. you just didn't know what to expect. or: the story of a boy, a girl, and the turbulence that fills the space between them.

☆。.:*·ﾟwc 14444 angst + smut ౨ৎ minors DNI ˚⁺。˚ // repost ୨୧ soobin x fem!reader, best friends to lovers, childhood friends to lovers to ???, first time. featuring beomgyu, taehyun, kai from txt, yuna from itzy, and arin from oh my girl [masterlist • reblogs + feedback appreciated]

playlist

you can vividly remember the first time you ever saw soobin.

it was the summer before third grade started.

it had been an unbearably hot summer and with the school year looming just a month away, you were dreading going back to school and trying so hard to not think about having to meet your new teacher and make new friends.

so to take you mind off the soul crushing pressures of elementary school, you begged your mom to let you go to the park. she refused, claiming she had to work, but the two of you made a compromise and you settled for riding your bike around the cul-de-sac where she could still see you from the dining room table.

you had been riding for thirty minutes, quickly growing tired of the rays of the sun beating down on your skin. you were about to call it a day, but that’s when you saw it.

the gray honda civic driving past you, the sun reflecting on the hood of the car. the woman in the front seat, slowly waking up from her slumber. her husband tapping her shoulder excitedly, looking at his new home in awe.

and him.

the young boy staring out the window with wide eyes as the car pulled into the driveway of the house beside yours.

you darted inside to tell your mom you had new neighbors.

at dinner time, she took you over with some food. “hello, we live right next door.” she introduced herself to the woman that opened the door. “i just thought you guys could use a warm meal with moving and everything.” behind her legs, you could see the little boy peeking at you.

she invited you in and you remember the way their house looked so devoid of life. what was supposed to be the living room was a sea of boxes. your mother sat beside his mother on the old brown leather couch that sat in the back of the room.

you caught soobin’s gaze, watching you taking in the sight of his new home. he looked away when he noticed you looking at him. you moved to sit beside him on the floor.

“i saw you,” he said when he registered your presence beside him.

“what?” you were slightly taken aback.

“outside.” he clarified. “you were on your bike.”

“oh,” you muttered. “my name is y/n.” you reached out to shake his hand. he looked at you, a bit puzzled, yet mirrored the gesture, his grip gentle and feeble.

“i’m soobin.”

“how old are you?”

“i’m almost 10.” he answered, glancing down at his hands.

“why did you move here?”

“my dad got a job.”

“do you want to ride bikes tomorrow?”

“i don’t know how.” soobin looked at you, uncertainty flickering in his eyes, his shy demeanor even more pronounced.

“i can teach you.” you offered.

and the next morning, at 11 sharp, soobin showed up in front of your house ready to learn. after that afternoon, you decided that you liked him and he was going to be your best friend. he didn’t talk much but he always listened to you, with a goofy smile plastered on his face. when he did talk, he answered all your questions thoughtfully. and most importantly, even after he fell down multiple times, he still showed up at your house the next day, waiting to learn.

by the time you got to middle school, everyone knew that you were two peas in a pod. from the day you met, everywhere you went, soobin wasn’t far behind, following you like a lost puppy. you always carpooled together; you always ate lunch together; you were even in all the same clubs.

and so when eighth grade began, you two were separated for the first time in five years and it was so hard for you to adjust to not seeing him every second of every day.

the first morning of the school year, you stopped yourself from asking your mom where soobin was when he wasn’t at your car waiting for you. you wandered through the halls to your regular lunch table a little surprised and mostly disappointed when you didn’t see him sitting with an extra cookie he always got from the lunch lady. after school, you sat awkwardly, alone, on the bench outside of the school building waiting for your mom to pick you up.

when you got home, you didn’t even bother going up to your room. you threw your backpack on the couch and made a beeline for his house. you flopped onto his bed with a sigh as soon as you got to his room, the softness of the mattress cradling you. he didn’t look up from where he sat at his desk doing his homework, but he acknowledged your arrival with a quiet hello.

“how was your first day of high school?” you asked, emphasizing the last part of your question.

“it was okay.” he scribbled something in his book.

“just okay?” you pressed.

“it was kind of weird.” he turned his chair around and finally looked up at you.

“did you miss me?”

“yeah, a little,” he confessed. a soft warmth bloomed in your chest, and you couldn’t help but smile to yourself.

“i think i might try out for the football team,” he blurted out of nowhere. “or maybe basketball? i don’t know yet.” you bursted out in laughter.

“did i say something funny?”

“you have no athletic bone in your body.” you countered, still chuckling.

“we don’t know that.”

“oh, we do,”

he moved to join you on the bed, books in hand, and you watched him with a fondness that didn’t need words as he made himself comfortable.

“i always tell you not to wear your outside clothes on my bed.” he jokingly admonished.

“do you like your school?”

“i mean, it’s only my first day. but it was okay.”

you paused, both to process what he just said and to figure out how to word what you really wanted to say. “i don’t want you to forget about me or stop hanging out with me or whatever.”

“you’re literally going to the same school next year.” he teased you.

“i know, but still.”

“you’re a hard person to forget about, y/n.”

“you’re just saying that,” you felt the blood rush up to your cheeks, and subsequently rushed to hide your face in his sheets.

“no, i mean, you literally wouldn’t let me forget about you.” he laughed and in response, you threw a pillow at him.

but in the back of your mind, you knew he was right – you couldn’t let him forget about you. and as the days rolled on, you made it a point to go over to his house for hours after school. at least for the first month and a half of the smeester. that was until the demands of school grew and he started having to stay after school for clubs and going over to people’s houses for projects. by the time the holidays rolled around, your moments together were reduced to the seconds you saw him in the mornings when you were both leaving for school. and for the most part, it stayed like that going into the summer.

the summer after eighth grade, you saw soobin a total of three times.

the first time you saw him was on memorial day. your dad, not exactly the biggest fan of your plan to stay home the entire summer, pushed you out of the house to go to his family’s barbecue. you went to soobin’s house with a tray of cookies (because you never go to someone’s house empty handed, your mom told you beforehand). he greeted you with a casual wave before disappearing upstairs to play video games with his friends. you lingered around his house for ten minutes, until you felt completely uncomfortable by yourself, when you slipped away back to your room, cocooning yourself in your bed, tears tracing paths down your cheeks, soaking into your sheets beneath you.

the second time was sometime right after the fourth of july. his dad was taking him on a fishing trip and you just so happened to be getting the mail as they were leaving. you tried to pretend not to see him, eyes fixed on the ground, your heart pounding. and you thought it worked. but later that day, a message lit up your phone screen – soobin confessing that he missed you. you deliberated for two hours before typing out a guarded response: “me too.” two weeks stretched out like an eternity before his next message came.

the third time was actually the day before your first day of high school when he came over to your house under orders from his mother. he stood at your bedroom door, a mixture of apprehension and determination etched across his face.

when you opened the door, all the feelings of abandonment came flooding through your mind – every time you cried thinking about how he was ignoring you, every time your parents had to force you to get out of the house and breathe in fresh air, everything came at once.

“what are you doing here?” you spat at him. your words were a shield, sharp and defensive.

“my mom said i should come check on you.” he responded, his hand absently massaging the back of his neck. you yielded, allowing him to enter the room, but he hesitated, lingering by the door, too afraid to sit down.

“are you nervous about high school?” he ventured.

you met his gaze, scanning his eyes for sincerity. “not really.”

“i’m sorry,” he admitted, his voice heavy with regret. “i’ve been pretty shitty to you this year.”

“yeah, you have been pretty shitty.”

“i meant it when i said i missed you.”

“i know.”

“are we good?”

he didn’t really apologize, you understood that. but sometimes, especially in that moment, it seems easier to forgive him than confront him about how horrible he made you feel. and so you concede, not realizing that you’re setting the precedent for you guys to saunter in and out of each other's lives as you please. “yeah, we are.”

you invite him to sit on the bed with you and he joins you.

“so, what is high school really like?” you ask, trying to clear the air of tension that lingered.

“well, it’s nothing like high school musical,” he began.

and although you were apprehensive about forgiving him so quickly, you couldn’t deny how good this felt. sitting here with him, not thinking about the future or the past. just being here talking about nothing and everything at the same time. if you could, you would have captured this moment and put it in a snow globe to look at everyday.

the next morning, you stood at the threshold of the school building, soobin towering beside you. as you walked into the school together, you couldn’t help but notice the subtle shift in the atmosphere. soobin seemed to be a lot more popular than he led on and he navigated the halls with a confidence that belied his usually reserved nature. students and teachers alike greeted him as you walked through the halls.

“okay, mr. superstar,” you teased.

“well, i am class president.” he tells you shyly.

“why didn’t i know this?” you wondered aloud. he offered you a nonchalant shrug but continued guiding you through the labyrinth of corridors that made up the school.

as you approached your classroom, the reality of where you were dawned on you. you turned to soobin, seeking reassurance from him. “i’ll see you at lunch?”

“yeah,” he affirmed.

with a final smile, you slipped into the classroom, taking a seat beside a girl who was looking at you with wide eyes.

“you know soobin?” she blurted out when you sat down.

your brows furrowed in confusion. “yeah?” you answered, taken aback.

“how?”

“uh, he’s my friend.” you explained, scanning the room for an empty seat.

a spark of hope lit up her eyes. “can you introduce me to him?”

you hesitated, your discomfort growing with each passing second. “i don’t even know you.”

a wave of awkwardness washed over the both of you. without waiting for a response, you quickly gathered your things, seeking refuge in a different seat on the other side of the classroom. what the hell was that? you thought to yourself as the other students filed into the class.

save for that strange moment in the first period, the rest of your classes went by completely unremarkable until lunch time rolled around. you arrived at the cafeteria fifteen minutes after lunch started. you were trying to navigate the way between hundreds of bodies in the hallway and found yourself in a completely different wing of the school. why does a high school have to be this big? you asked yourself when you collided with a girl.

“are you okay?” you asked her.

“yeah, i’m just trying to find the cafeteria.” her response came with a note of relief.

“me too. i’m y/n.”

“i’m yuna and this school is way too big.” she remarked, a trace of exasperation lacing her words.

“yeah, i got a tour this morning and i’m still confused.”

should we ask someone for help?” yuna suggested.

“yeah,” together you venture into a nearby classroom to ask a teacher for help.

meanwhile, in the cafeteria, soobin took advantage of your little detour to offer a preemptive warning to his friends about how to act around the freshman girl that was going to be eating lunch with them.

“i’m serious, you guys, don’t be weird.”

“when have we ever been weird?” beomgyu asked, but his playful tone is punctuated by a stray fry launched by kai, which found its target on taehyun’s head.

soobin gave beomgyu a knowing look.

“we won’t be weird, okay?” his friend reassured him. “what’s with the girl anyways?”

“she’s my best friend and i don’t want you guys to scare her.”

you finally make it to the cafeteria with yuna by your side. soobin introduced you to his friends, and you briefly remember them from memorial day. as the lunch period dragged on, you sat quietly, observing soobin in his element. you never felt this way before, but watching the way he interacted with his friends made him a little more attractive in your eyes. there was a magnetism in his confidence and you couldn’t help but entertain thoughts that had never crossed your mind before.

and from them, you found yourself yearning for those stolen glances, fingers brushing in passing and shared laughter that lingered just a little longer than usual.

being best friends with someone older than you had its perks, especially when that person was as smart as soobin. you were pretty good at biology freshman year, and chemistry was okay too. but no one warned you that knowing the powerhouse of the cell or all the symbols of the periodic table was enough to equip you for an honors physics class.

even though you stayed up for three nights in a row, you didn’t expect to do so bad on the unit test. it was embarrassingly bad. like bringing the class average down bad. like being handed back a folded test bad. you opened your test packet hesitantly, only to quickly close it again upon seeing the harsh, red “36/100” glaring back at you. the room seemed to close in around you, the disappointment heavy in the air.

after class, you went to meet your teacher. “are you sure there’s no way i could get some extra credit or something?” you asked, your voice carrying a mix of desperation and determination.

“y/n,” he said, his tone firm. “if i give you extra credit, i have to give everyone extra credit,” he advised. “if you want a better grade, i suggest you study harder.”

“fucking asshole,” you mutter under your breath as you left the classroom. the slam of the door echoed down the empty hallway.

yuna, who was waiting for you outside your class, scowled when she saw your demeanor. “what’s wrong?”

“he’s such an asshole.”

“what did he do this time?”

you handed her your test and slung your backpack onto your shoulder in frustration. her face scrunched up when she saw the red ink that scattered the page. she reached out to gently caress your hair in a soothing gesture. “oh, honey…”

“and he wouldn’t let me do extra credit.”

“didn’t your boyfriend take this class last year?” yuna asked, trying to find a solution.

“boyfriend?” you replied. you knew where she was going with this, but you wanted to see if she would actually say it. but you knew she was never one to back down. “soobin?” she asks.

“not my boyfriend.” you remind her in a singsong voice, causing her to roll her eyes.

“well, i’m pretty sure he took this class last year. just ask him to tutor you.”

you hum, pulling out your phone to text him.

to soob: i hate to ask you this but i really need your help

from soob: you know i’m always gonna help you what do you need

to soob: one quiz away from failing physics can my bestest friend in the whole entire world help me

from soob: you know you don’t need to butter me up but i’ll take it

to soob: you know i love you so much right? can you come over tonight?

that evening, you meticulously laid out your physics notes and textbook on the kitchen island. you were stressing a lot, and in an attempt to calm your racing thoughts, you decided to bake. the sounds of the mixer and the clinking of the measuring cups was always something that soothed your anxious thoughts.

as the timer chimed, you pulled the tray of cookies out from the oven. just as you set them on the cooling rack, the doorbell rang, sending a jolt of nervous anticipation back through you.

you open the door to soobin.

“thank you again for doing this,” you said as you welcomed him inside. you guided him to the island. “i made cookies, so please feel free to take some.”

his eyes brightened with surprise. “you made cookies? i didn’t know you could bake.”

“i started in middle school,” you confessed, a hint of vulnerability crept into your voice. “my therapist said it was a good way to process my emotions. i don’t know.”

“you’re in therapy?”

“yeah, since middle school.”

“oh.”

the atmosphere in the kitchen shifted. you both settle into your seats. the tutoring session began, but despite your best efforts, you found it hard to focus. the equations and diagrams that soobin so easily drew out seemed to blur together and your mind drifted elsewhere. the only thing you could concentrate on was soobin’s long, veiny hands as they gracefully navigated the pages of the physics textbook in front of you.

“should we take a break?” his voice pulled you out of your thoughts.

you blinked, realizing that you had been staring at the same problem for a little too long. “i’m sorry. long day.”

“no, don’t apologize,” soobin reassured you. “it’s getting late anyways. we can always try again tomorrow.”

the next few tutoring sessions followed a similar pattern, but today you managed to gather yourself and focus, determined not to get lost in the small smile that graced soobin’s face whenever you correctly answered a question.

“you know what you’re doing?”

“what?”

“you know what you’re doing. just don’t overthink it.” he was referring to the problem set in front of you.

“oh, yeah,” you replied, your hand moving swiftly across the paper. in your mind, even if you got the question wrong, he would patiently explain it to you. this way, you wouldn’t be trapped in your head, thinking about how close he was to you, close enough to pick up hints of his shampoo, or how pretty his eyes looked with the kitchen lights dancing in them, or how soft his hands felt as they brushed against yours when he took the paper from you.

to your surprise, you managed to avoid any embarrassment for the rest of the session.

“when’s your next test?”

“in two weeks, i think,”

“we can meet a couple of nights a week until then,” he suggested.

as time passed, you found it easier to concentrate, the initial nervousness giving away to a growing confidence. you had to admit. soobin was a good tutor and with each passing day, you felt the weight of the test lessen, until the day of the test.

from soob: test day! how are you feeling?

to soob: i think i’m going to throw up

from soob: please don’t you’re going to do great you know i’m always rooting for you!!

you walked into the classroom with your chin held high, determined to “fake it till you make it” your way into a passing grade, but you spent the rest of the week after that a bundle of restlessness and anticipation.

finally, the day you dreaded the most arrived. the door swung open, and your teacher strode in, a stack of papers clutched in his hand. you held your breath, fingers crossed under the desk as he made his way down the rows, inching closer and closer.

“good job,” he smiled at you when he handed you your test.

after class, you practically sprinted to soobin’s locker, eager to share the news.

“check me out! i’m a nerd like you,” you exclaimed, thrusting the test paper towards him.

“har har,” he let out an amused snort, rolling his eyes. “i knew you could do it. maybe next time we can shoot for a 100?”

“i think we should focus on maintaining this 80%,” you chuckled. “i think this calls for a celebration. can you come over tonight?”

that evening, you and soobin set out to tackle the challenge of baking brownies. he was good at a lot of things but admittedly was very useless in the kitchen.

“it’s fine.” you reassured him, “i can teach you.”

“you’re always teaching me things,” he noted, his ears burning as he looked down at the mixing bowl.

“what are you talking about? i’m literally now passing physics because of you.

“not school things,” he explains. “i mean like practical life things. you taught me how to ride a bike; you taught me how to make friends––”

“i taught you how to make friends?”

“yes, you did. being friends with you just made me outgoing, i guess.”

“hmm.”

“anyways, you’re teaching me how to bake, although i think this might be a lost cause,” he quipped, eyeing the ingredients skeptically.

“just crack those eggs,” you instructed.

while you dealt with other things, soobin stood expertly mixing the batter. “can i taste it?” you asked, holding up a spoon.

“wait, this is so good,” you marveled at your own recipe.

soobin’s gaze met yours, a hint of a smile playing on his lips. he edged closer to you. “you have something…” he said softly, swiping your chin with his thumb, then tasting the chocolate batter from his finger.

“oh, uh, th-thanks,” you stammered, turning toward the sink to hide the elated grin that threatened to give you away. inside, you were almost bursting at the seams.

“so, cookies are for nerves, brownies are for celebration?” soobin asked, as you two settled onto the plush couch.

“and cakes are for when i’m sad,” you quipped, fingers deftly flicking the remote to life. “what do you want to watch?”

“i don’t care. whatever you want.”

wrapped in the cocoon of the soft blanket, you both sank into the cushions, the movie’s glow flickering across your faces.

as the credits rolled on the screen, you and soobin sat up, still close, but the proximity was charged with an unspoken confession.

“did you like the movie?” you asked, attempting to dispel the atmosphere.

“we’ve seen it like a million times,”

“yeah, but still.” you press and he just shrugs.

after a pregnant pause, he finally broke the stillness. “i feel like i need to tell you something.”

your heart quickened, a whirlwind of emotions swirling within. “yeah?”

“i, uh,” his voice wavered for a moment. “i like you,” he admitted, his words stumbling out in a rush, eyes fixed on a point somewhere in the middle distance.

“what?”

“i like you,” he repeated, softer and steadier this time. soobin’s heart raced, his pulse thrumming in his ears as he awaited your response. you, on the other hand, were filled with surprise and something else, you couldn’t even decipher. your breath caught. it was like the air had grown heavier, charged with unspoken desires and uncharted territory.

“oh.” you managed to let out. “that’s… oh.”

his gaze flickered back to his hands, usually so steady, that laid, slightly trembling in his lap. “it’s fine if you don’t feel the same. i’ve just been dealing with these feelings for a while and i just needed to tell you.”

“soobin, it’s—”

“you don’t have to say anything; i get it.” he interjected, “just forget about this. i value our friendship a lot more, so i don’t want things to be awkward between us.”

“soobin!” you exclaimed your voice firm and determined. “i like you too, but we… we can’t do this.”

“why not?”

“well, for starters, you’re graduating in the spring.”

“and i’m probably going to school, like what? two hours away?”

“i don’t want you to feel like you’re missing out on your college experience by being with me or whatever.”

“y/n, you’re literally my best friend.”

“precisely why we shouldn’t risk it,” you insisted. “i cherish our friendship, and i don't want to jeopardize it.”

“i promise you there’s absolutely nothing that could ever make us not be friends.”

“i don’t… i don’t know.”

“sleep on it, okay?” he conceded, rising from the couch. “i should probably go home.”

you escorted him to the door, the gravity of the moment still lingering. “see you tomorrow?” he asked, framed in the doorway. the threshold seemed both a physical and emotional boundary, like a bridge between the familiar present and the uncertain future of your relationship.

“yeah.”

he leaned forward, a gentle breath of warmth preceding the tender press of his lips against your cheek. “goodnight, y/n,” he murmured before fading into the night.

your fingers lightly brushed your cheek, still tingling from where his lips had been. the sensation was still tingling, like a spark of electricity had been left behind. climbing the stairs you couldn’t help but grin from ear to ear. you felt like you were floating as you made your way to your room, crashing on your bed, kicking your feet thinking about the fact that he likes you.

the next day, you decided to skip lunch in the cafeteria. “please can you tell me why we’re eating lunch in the library today?” yuna asks, tossing her backpack onto a beanbag in the corner of the library where you settled.

“something happened last night.”

“did you and soobin finally kiss?” she asked, a sly grin creeping onto her face. you look up at her, trying to suppress your smile.

“well, not really.”

“not really? what happened?”

“he told me he liked me.”

yuna let out an excited squeal, earning disapproving glances from the other students.

“and he kissed my cheek.”

“shut up!” she was practically bouncing in her seat, unable to maintain her excitement.

“yeah, you should shut up.” some guy at a nearby table griped, annoyed by the disruption.

she rolled her eyes, returning her attention to you. “anyways, i’m so happy for you.”

“don’t get your hopes up.”

“oh, no.”

“yuna, he’s graduating soon.”

“okay? i don’t see what the problem is. you’ve had a crush on him forever and he was the one who said it first.”

“i just don’t want to do a long distance thing.”

“he lives right beside you.”

“and he’s moving away in seven months.”

“he’s moving to a different town, not a different country.”

“hey, you guys are making a lot of noise,” the library assistant reprimanded, approaching your table. “and you know you’re not allowed to eat in here.” she referred to yuna’s food.

“sorry,” you apologized, your voice meek.

she walked away, leaving you both to your conversation.

“yeah, ‘cause my carrots are going to crumb all over the books,” yuna quipped, but she complied, tucking away her lunch.

“i just don’t want to lose my best friend.”

with a multitude of thoughts swirling around your head, you knew you needed to talk to soobin. after school, you made your way to his house. as you walked to his bedroom, each step was weighed down by the uncertainty and anticipation that filled your heart.

the soft knock on soobin’s door pulled him from his thoughts. he swung the door open to find you standing there.

“hey,” you greeted, your voice above a whisper.

“hey,” he stepped back, allowing you in. his heart raced, a mix of hope and fear coursing through him.

you walked into his room taking in the decor. it hadn’t changed much from middle school. his walls were adorned with a mix of posters. a bookshelf stood against one of the walls, filled with a well-organized collection of novels, textbooks, and mementos. his desk, which sat by the window, was decorated with photos of the two of you from elementary school that you surprisingly hadn’t seen before. looking at them gave you the motivation to have the say everything that you wanted to say.

he gestured to his bed. you settled into your usual spots, the silence stretching, punctuated only by the soft sounds of the clock. soobin couldn’t help but steal glances at you, the room charged with tension.

“so, we should talk about last night.” you took a deep breath. he turned to face you, his gaze steady, waiting for your words. “i’ve been thinking a lot,” you continued. “and i do want to give this, us, a try.”

a smile broke across his face and you couldn’t help but melt. “you have no idea how happy that makes me.”

you mirrored his smile, a sense of contentment settling in your chest. “but,” you added, your expression turning more serious, “you are graduating soon, so we need to be realistic.”

he nodded. “we can face it together, one step at a time.”

you reach out, your fingers finding his. “okay,”

“can i kiss you now?”

“yes,” you giggled.

he cupped your face, slowly closing the space between you. meanwhile, your hands snaked their way to the back of his neck, pulling him down so his soft lips met yours. the world seemed to fade away, leaving only the sensation of his lips against yours.

the first touch was as light as a feather, but as a surge of emotion overcame the initial hesitation, the kiss deepened. time seemed to stand still and the moment stretched into infinity until you heard a cough coming from the door.

you quickly pull away from the kiss, your heart racing. soobin’s eyes held affection, his fingers still lightly grazing your cheek. you looked to the door to see his mom with her hands on her hips, a playful smirk on her face. “i was just checking to see if you were going to stay for dinner, y/n.” she said, her voice carrying a hint of amusement.

looking down at your hands, that sat in soobin’s hands, you responded quietly. “yeah, i’ll just text my parents.”

“okay,” she left the room with a knowing smile

“that was so,” you squealed in embarrassment, burying your face in soobin’s shoulder. his warmth enveloped you like a comforting embrace as his fingers gently traced patterns on your back.

“at least she likes you,” he joked, making you groan. “we should go downstairs,” he suggests, pulling away reluctantly.

as you proceed to stand up, he playfully tugged you back down, his eyes never leaving yours. “wait.” his voice held a soft urgency, his gaze locked onto your lips. “just one more.” he leaned in, the touch of his lips against yours sending a surge of warmth through your veins. his smile melted into the kiss.

“okay, we can go now.”

you followed him downstairs and avoided his mom’s knowing glances throughout dinner.

for the next few months, you spent almost every day with soobin. the two of you were once again attached at the hip, savoring every moment leading up to his impending graduation.

and the dreaded day of the ceremony arrived. soobin, loose tie in hand, entered his parents’ room with a furrowed brow. “mom, where’s dad?”

“he had to stop by the office, but he’ll meet us there,” she responded, finishing up her makeup. as she finished she turned to her son, her eyes sparkling. “oh my god,” she cooed. “you look so handsome.” she pulled him into a hug.

“god, mom, relax.” soobin chuckled, gently extricating himself from her affectionate grip. he smoothed out the wrinkles on his shirt.

“is it a crime for a mother to be proud of her son for graduating?”

“no, but i need help with the tie.” he gave it to her.

she took the tie, fingers deftly weaving it into place around her neck. “is y/n coming with us?”

“no, she’s going with her parents.”

“you know, i’m really glad you have her in your life.” there was a tenderness in her voice, her eyes fixed on her son as she put the tie around his neck, adjusting his collar.

“that’s random.”

“it’s not random. i’m just saying you’re graduating and going to college soon, and i just don’t want you to take her for granted.”

“i won’t. i promise.”

“ok,” she declared, a smile gracing her lips, indicating that she had finished. “good to go, we’re leaving in ten minutes so go finish getting ready.”

you arrive at your school’s auditorium thirty minutes before the ceremony began. you quickly settle beside soobin’s mother.

“i’m so glad you guys could make it,” she greeted warmly.

you scanned the hall, searching for your boyfriend in the sea of cap and gowns. the familiar hum of your phone in your lap brought your attention back to the present. it was a text from soobin, asking you to meet him outside the auditorium.

“is my dad there?” soobin’s voice held a note of urgency when he saw you.

“not yet, but your mom said he’s on his way. are you okay?” your hand rested comfortingly on his shoulder, trying to steady his nerves.

“i’m just nervous about the speech and the fact that he isn’t here yet.”

“well, he’s going to be here. who would miss their only child’s graduation?” you offered a reassuring smile, attempting to lighten the mood. “and the speech is going to go perfectly, okay?”

“you don’t know that.”

“yes, i do! you’ve been practicing all week. you’re going to do great.”

“what if i mess up?”

“if you mess up, just find me in the crowd, okay? i’ll be with both your parents and my parents, and we’ll all be cheering on you.”

“alright, thank you.” he took a deep, steadying breath.

you reached up, planting a tender kiss on his lips. “you’re going to do great,” you affirmed, and with that, he headed through the student entrance into the auditorium.

the ceremony flowed seamlessly. pride swelled in you as you watched soobin take the stage. his dad slid into your row just as he went on stage, and you offered him a thumbs-up, met in kind.

you returned to soobin’s house with your parents for the celebration. the living room was adorned with congratulatory banners and balloons, the most bright and colorful you’d ever seen his house.

for most of the party, you didn’t see much of him as he was passed around by friends and relatives that wanted to congratulate him. but eventually, at some point in the night he finds you and the two of you escape from the party to embrace the quiet of his room. the room was dimly lit, and mostly quiet, save for the chatter and the music softly playing from outside the door.

“god, i really needed this,” he confessed, stretching out on his bed. you nestled beside him, resting your head on his chest. he enveloped you in arms, fingers entwined with yours. “talking to people is exhausting,” he sighed.

“you were amazing today,” you reassured him.

“because i had you there with me.”

“and your dad came.”

“yeah, half an hour late. i can’t believe he went to work today.”

“at least he was there.”

“i don’t even care anymore. i’m just happy you were there and that we’re here together right now. i can’t wait for this summer.”

“i need to tell you something.”

“yeah,” he turned to you, fingers gently playing with yours.

“you know how i’m vice president of culinary club?” he hummed in acknowledgement.

“well, our faculty advisor told me about this culinary school that she thinks i should apply to for college.” you explained. “anyways she thinks i need to get a job or internship or something this summer to make my application stronger.”

“yeah,” his voice took on a more tentative tone.

“well, she connected me with one of her friends who owns a restaurant downtown and he said that i could, like, shadow him for the summer.”

“that’s great but–”

“i know. i don’t think it’s going to stop us from spending time together. we’ll still be able to do everything that we planned on doing. it’s just not going to be everyday.”

“baby, you don’t have to explain yourself to me.”

“i just feel bad.” your voice softened.

“why?”

“we had so many plans.” you pouted

“and we’ll still be able to do them,” he assured you. “i think it might be good practice for us when i go to school in the fall.”

“yeah, you’re right.”

you leaned up to kiss him, and he kissed you back.

the two of you lingered on his bed, the world beyond the room fading into insignificance. then, a gentle rap on the door pulled you out of your trivial conversations.

“soobin,” his dad entered the room, voice cutting through the hush. “some of your guests are leaving. go downstairs to say goodbye.”

soobin shot up from the bed. “yeah, i’ll head down now.”

“y/n can i talk to you?” his dad asked. soobin looked back at you before leaving the room.

“yeah, what’s wrong?”

“nothing’s wrong. i just wanted to talk to you about soobin.”

“what about soobin?”

“why don’t you sit down,” he suggested. you complied, perching on your boyfriend's bed. “i wanted to talk about soobin because well he’s going to college in the fall and i just want to make sure that he’s not wasting his experience or losing his focus.”

you weren’t sure how to respond. “i’m don’t know–”

“see y/n, you’re a great girl and you’ve been there for soobin for a long time, but you also distract him.”

“what?”

“i work really hard to make sure that my family can live in this neighborhood and so that my only son can go to a good school. i don’t want to see him waste his life over his high school girlfriend.”

your chest tightened, emotions surging. you wanted to speak up, to yell at him and tell him off for inserting himself into your relationship. you wanted to yell at him for even saying this to you when he couldn’t be bothered to show up for his only son’s high school graduation. you wanted to defend your love and your commitment to soobin. but as the tears welled up in your eyes, the words caught in your throat. all you could manage was a quiet, “okay.”

“i’m glad you understand. i know we both care about him and we both want the best for him.”

he exits the room, leaving you alone with your thoughts and your tears. the last words he spoke echoed in your mind. we both want what’s best for him.

you gathered enough composure and strength, wiping away your tears, and made your way downstairs. you attempted to slip away quietly, but soobin caught you at the door.

“you’re leaving?” the dim light from the porch illuminated his face, casting soft shadows across his features.

“yeah, it’s getting late.”

“are you okay?” he noticed the tremor in your voice.

“yeah, i’m just super tired.”

“oh, okay? what did my dad want to talk to you about?”

“oh, he just asked me to send him the videos and photos i took of you earlier.” the lie tasted bitter on your tongue, but you pushed it out regardless, hoping to shield soobin from the weight of his father’s words.

“are you sure you’re okay?” he asked, taking hold of your hands. “do you want me to walk you home?”

“no, yeah, i’m fine.” you pull him into a hug for what felt like an eternity. if he noticed anything wrong with you after that, he didn’t bring it up. “i’ll see you tomorrow.”

that night, you couldn’t fall asleep. the room seemed to close in around you suffocating in its emptiness. the echoes of the conversation with soobin’s father reverberated in your mind, haunting you.

you grappled with the weight of your fears and insecurities. what if he was right? what if you were holding soobin back? distracting him? the thought had always lingered at the back of your mind since you began dating. and now that he was actually starting at college, that unspoken fear threatened to consume you.

maybe his dad was right. you needed to give him the space that he needed to grow. and it’s not like you had to break up with him. you just needed to keep him at an arm’s length and this summer was a chance for you to learn how to do that with you working. so in the weeks that followed, you found yourself pulling away and creating that distance. the space between you stretched as you took more shifts at work and spent less time with your boyfriend.

“i might move into school a week early,” soobin told you one day when you were hanging out in your room.

you felt your heart sink.

you hadn’t spent that much time together and now you had even less time together. it felt like a cruel twist of fate. still, you masked your disappointment with forced encouragement. “that’s good.” you muttered. “get to know the area better.”

“you think i should go?”

“i mean, if you want to. it seems like a good idea.”

“okay,”

as the day arrived for soobin to leave for school, you felt a void open up within you. the weight of missed moments and unspoken words crushed your soul, suffocating in their intensity. you called out of work but stayed in bed all day, cocooned in the covers, crying about the fact that you couldn’t allow yourself to savor the little time you had with soobin.

when soobin facetimed you later that evening, your heart both leapt and sank at the sight of his face. “hey, let me see your face.”

“i look horrible,” you groaned, but still revealed your face that was covered by your blankets and pillows.

soobin’s brows furrowed when he saw your face with your eyes red and your nose puffy. “have you been crying?”

“no, i’m just sick.” you tried to hide it, to mask the pain, but the cracks in your facade were all too evident.

“please, y/n, don’t lie to me.”

the raw vulnerability in his voice cracked something open within you. “i just miss you and i wish I could have helped you move in.”

“maybe i can come home on the weekend after classes start?” you wanted to revel in the possibility of seeing him again so soon, however the question lingered heavy in the air.

“do you think i’m holding you back from getting the full college experience?”

“where did that come from?”

“what if there’s like… i don’t know, a really cool frat party that weekend? would you miss out on that for me?”

“i think i’d rather see my girlfriend than go to some hypothetical frat party.”

“i’m being serious.”

“do you not want me to come home?” his question hung in the air, like a delicate thread of vulnerability. the room seemed to pulse with unspoken tension. your fingers tightened around the edges of your blanket, grasping for comfort and grounding, as you thought over your answer. every second of the silence felt like a weight on your shoulders.

you sighed. “i do, but–”

“then what’s the problem, y/n?” soobin’s voice, slightly raised, tinged with frustration, cut through the hush. “it seems like ever since the summer started you’ve been pushing me away, and i don’t know if i did something wrong.”

“you didn’t do anything wrong.”

“so what’s up?”

“i just don’t want you to feel like you’re wasting your time focusing on your high school girlfriend when you have so much life ahead of you.”

“you’re not just my high school girlfriend.” his voice softened.

“that’s not what i meant.”

“you’re also my best friend. and i don’t ever feel like i’m wasting my time by being with you.”

you contemplate telling him what his dad said, but you ultimately decide against it.

“what are you thinking?” he asked after you didn't respond for a while.

“i don’t know.” you confessed, your voice barely louder than a whisper.

“i need you to be honest with me because i don’t know what you need or how much more i can reassure you that you’re it for me.”

“maybe we should take a break?” the words slipped out before you could stop them.

“what?” soobin’s eyes widened, disbelief and hurt dancing in their depths.

“just maybe for the semester.” you rushed to explain, “so you can get your footing in school and i can focus on college apps.”

“so, you want to break up?”

“not like a real breakup. we’ll still talk and everything, just with some space.” he looked away, his jaw clenched, like he was processing the idea.

“i can’t believe you’re suggesting this.” his voice cracks as he blinks back the tears welling up in his eyes.

“maybe it’s what we need right now. we’ll still talk.” you promised, mostly trying to convince yourself.

the call ended and the weight of your decision settled on your chest, like a heavy ache that echoed the emptiness you felt inside. in your head, you were making the right choice for both of you, but that didn’t make it any easier. and as hard as you tried to maintain your relationship with soobin, over the next few months, the calls and messages became less frequent. the space between you was growing wider and each interaction held a bittersweet tinge, a mix of familiarity and the painful reminder of what once was.

the next break from school came quicker than you had expected. you sat at your desk, catching up on homework as the late morning sun streamed through the window, casting a warm glow across the room. the creak of your bedroom door announced your dad’s presence.

“how are you doing?” he asked, his voice tinged with concern.

a faint smile danced on your lips as you turned to face him. “i’m not going to kill myself dad,” you joked, trying to lighten the mood. “i’m just doing homework.”

“you’ve been in your room all break. i think i’m allowed to be worried.”

you bristled, the walls rising around you like a fortress. “well you shouldn’t be, okay? i’m fine.”

“okay so you don’t care to know that i saw soobin’s car pull up into the driveway?” he asked. you let out a soft, almost imperceptible sigh, your gaze shifted to the patch of sunlight dancing on the floor.

“are you going to see him?” he gently suggested.

“i don’t know if he wants to see me,” you admitted, your voice a hesitant whisper. the weight of uncertainty settled around you, and your dad’s brow furrowed in empathy. he approached you to comfort you. “i think i messed up,” you confessed, the words tasting bitter on your tongue.

he paused to study your face, and then he spoke, his tone filled with reassurance. “i’m sure whatever you did isn’t that bad. who could ever not want to see you?”

a small smile tugged at the corner of your lips, grateful for his attempt to ease your worries. “you’re just saying that because you’re my dad.”

he reached out, placing a reassuring hand on your shoulder. “you know that’s not true. and you know he wants to see you because he cares for you, and he knows you care for him too.”

“and what if that’s not enough?”

his gaze softened, “then you shouldn’t base your worth on what some guys thinks of you.”

“some guy? i thought you liked soobin.”

“yeah, but i like you more.” he pulled you into a warm embrace, the strength of his love wrapping around you like a shield. as he left the room, a sense of comfort lingered in the air. you sat there, the moment stretching, the decision before you felt like a bridge to cross, but you chose to not let fear dictate your actions.

with a determined exhale, you reached for your phone.

to soob: hey, i saw you just got home. whenever you get a chance, can you come over? i think we need to talk.

later that night, in the quiet stillness of your room, you receive a knock on your door. your heart quickened. you leaped out of bed, ready to face whatever awaited for you on the other side of the door.

“hey,” you breathed, the door swinging open to reveal soobin.

“hi,”

“please come in,” you invited him in. you held the door open, allowing him to step into your sanctuary. “how have you been?”

“good,” he replied, though there was a subtle hesitance in his tone.

“really?”

he left out a soft chuckle, a nervous habit that betrayed the calm facade he tried to maintain. “well, no, but i thought it was the appropriate thing to say.” his hand moved to rub the back of his neck. “how are you?”

“been better,” you confessed.

he settled onto the edge of your bed, and you joined him.

“so you wanted to talk?”

“i’m sorry,” the words tumbled from your lips.

“for?”

“everything?” the raw honesty of the moment threatened to engulf you. “asking for a break, not talking to you. i messed everything up.”

“you didn’t mess anything up,” he countered.

“but look at where we are,” you murmured, your gaze falling to the floor, unable to bear the weight of the truth in his eyes.

“and where is that?”

“here.” you took a deep breath and looked into his eyes. “i just want us to be good like before,” you said after a long pause.

soobin’s expression softened, “me too. i’ve missed you.”

“like crying and throwing up every night?” you teased.

“eh, something like that,” a hint of a smile played on his lips, the lamplight catching the warmth in his eyes.

“good to know,” you replied, a smile tugging at your own lips.

“i’ve said this before, but you’re really it for me.”

“is that so?”

“yeah, even though your dad was giving me a stank as i was coming upstairs.”

“he was?”

“yeah, and i thought your parents loved me.”

“they do!”

“that doesn’t sound convincing,” he joked, a genuine laugh filling the room, echoing off the walls.

“they do, they do.” you try to convince him. “they’re just really protective.”

“well, how can i get in their good graces again?”

“maybe by kissing me.” you suggest, teasingly.

“you think kissing their daughter is going to make them not hate me?”

“yeah, i think it might be a start.” you replied, your voice soft, but sure.

“okay.”

he cups your face, pulling you into a tender kiss. as your lips met his, a surge of warmth spread through you, grounding you in the present moment. your hands found their rightful place on the back of his neck, fingers intertwining with the soft strands of his hair. in that fleeting, stolen breath of moment, the world outside seemed to dissolve, leaving just the two of you suspended in this fragile, but powerful connection.

when you finally pulled away, the room took a breath with you. in that moment, everything felt right again. you were back to your version of normal, and it was perfect.

soobin sat cross legend on your bed waiting for you to bring up some snacks. it was the first weekend of your spring break and he decided to come down to surprise you. while waiting for you, his gaze fell upon a large envelope on your bedside table, its seal embossed with the emblem of the culinary school that you had told him about.

“okay, this is a new recipe that i’ve been working on.” you announce, walking into the room with a plate of cookies in your hand. “i want you to be honest with me. that being said, if you hate it, i’m going to cry.”

“why didn’t you tell me that you got in?” he asked as he inspected the envelope.

“because i’m not going.” you set the plate on your bed.

“why not?” concern was etched into the lines of his face.

“for starters,” your gaze drifted to the windows. “i got more money from other schools. besides, it’s on the other side of the country.”

“so?”

“so, that’s too far.”

“but you knew where it was when you applied,” he pressed. “and it’s your dream school.”

“that doesn’t matter, soobin.”

“well, why not?”

“because, you’re here.” you admitted.

“so, you’re staying for me?”

“you don’t want me to?”

“no,”

“oh,”

“y/n,” he leaned forward, reaching out to touch your hand. “i don’t want you to give up on your dreams because of me.” his thumb was tracing patterns on your hand. “why is it so easy for you to understand when it comes to me but not when it comes to you?”

“i’m not giving up on my dreams,” you argued, your eyes meeting the boy on your bed with determination. “i just want to be with you right now.”

his fingers tightened around yours, trying to grasp the gravity of your decision. “we can still be together.”

“with 2000 miles between us?” you questioned. “we could barely handle a hundred. we’re finally good again. i don’t want to go to school across the country and have that change.”

“nothing’s going to change.”

“you don’t know that.”

“you’re right, i don’t know that.” he began, “but i do know that we literally broke up six months ago, and now i’m sitting on your bed again.”

“it wasn’t a break up; it was a break,” you interjected, a small smile playing on your lips.

“okay,” he dragged out the last syllable. “but my point still stands. we’ve been through a lot and we always end up right beside each other.”

you get your laptop from your desk and log into the admissions portal. “are you going to accept it now?”

“no time like the present.”

five months later, you found yourself getting in a taxi to your dorm with your parents by your side. they insisted on driving you there, but you managed to convince them that a cross country road trip would cause more harm than good to your familial relationship.

as you settled into the backseat of the cab, the familiar scent of your mother’s perfume enveloped you. the engine hummed softly beneath you, and the rhythmic sound of tires on pavement created a comforting backdrop.

your mother’s eyes sparkled with a mixture of excitement and a touch of sadness. she reached over and gently squeezed your hand, her grip warm and reassuring. “are you excited, honey?” she asked.

your father, who sat in the front seat, spent the entire ride bombarding you with questions about pepper spray.

you managed to drown out your parents, looking out the window, watching the cityscape evolve as you approached your dorm. the towering skyscrapers seemed to reach for the sky, casting long shadows over the bustling streets. you felt a knot of nervous energy settle in your stomach.

at your dorm, your parents helped you carry your bags up to your room. the air tingled with the scent of freshly painted walls and the promise of new beginnings. your room was a blank canvas, waiting for you to imprint it with your personality.

as you unpacked, your mother offered suggestions for organizing your belongings, and your father, more practically, made a list of all the necessities you needed to get like extra blankets and a first aid kit.

yuna, whose school went back in session a few days earlier, texted you inviting you to hang out with her and her roommate. you walked your parents back to their hotel, eating takeout from a nearby chinese restaurant in their room.

as the meal came to an end, there was a bittersweet air, as you gathered your things and left their room. you met yuna in a park downtown, sitting with her roommate. you ran towards her, the anticipation and joy bubbling over. she enveloped you in a tight hug. “i’m so glad you’re finally here.”

as you walked through the park, the conversation flowed effortlessly. you felt a sense of peace settle over you. it was like the first taste of the home you were building for yourself in this new, unfamiliar place.

you arrived back at your dorm alone. your room greeted you with a sense of familiarity. your side was a collage of memories and personal touches – framed photos, trinkets from home, and the soft glow of fairy lights casting a warm, golden hue.

you sat on your bed, looking out the window, the skyscrapers now standing in line with you. the city’s pulsed thrummed faintly in the distance. gone were the nerves that accompanied you earlier. in their place, a newfound sense of determination settled within you. you knew you had to do what you needed to make this place your own. it was the beginning of a new chapter, and you were ready to embrace it with open arms.

and luckily for you, this new chapter did not come at the detriment of your relationship at first. for the first two months of the semester, you and soobin were still talking everyday and about everything – your classes, the new recipes you were working on, how one of your professors worked at one of the most famous restaurants in the world, and about your friends, how much yuna’s presence helped you settle in, how your roommate neither leaves the room nor says a word to you.

for the first time in this relationship, you could almost say that everything was fine.

but as time went on, you felt yourselves shifting into your old patterns of not talking to each other. in the back of your mind, you couldn’t shake off the feeling that soobin had lied. it seemed like everything was changing. or maybe he was right. maybe this was how it always was. there were never enough hours in the day for you guys to be together and you were coming to find that had always been a pattern throughout your relationship. it was just like eighth grade, or the summer before he left for college, or his first semester of college. the story was almost exactly the same – first it was missing texts because of conflicting class times and time zones. but then hours became days which became weeks and before you knew it, winter break was knocking on your door.

this was the first time you would see soobin in four months and the only thing that you wanted to do was melt into his arms. the familiar sights of your childhood neighborhood rushed past as your dad drove you home from the airport. every turn brought you closer to that one house on the street, the house that held so many memories, and now, the promise of reconnection.

as the car pulled into your driveway, you couldn’t contain your excitement. leaping out, you dashed inside your house, tossing your bags onto your bedroom floor with reckless abandon.

his mother greeted you at the door. “y/n, honey, you’re back!” she exclaimed, pulling you into a tight embrace.

growing up, you never spent much time outside of soobin’s bedroom in his home. his father’s relentless work schedule and his mother’s hesitancy to host guests left the rest of the house shrouded in a quiet unfamiliarity. as you walked through the hallways, you thought about how cold and gray the house looked the summer they moved in. it wasn’t much different now.

a deep breath steadied you as you approached soobin’s closed door.

some things didn’t change. the butterflies that swarmed around in your stomach were a constant companion that signaled you were exactly where you needed to be. but then you thought about how lonely you were without him this semester and you decided that maybe everything changing was for the best.

“y/n, you’re home?” his face betrayed him showing confusion. he never had the best poker face.

“yeah,” you affirmed softly, pushing open the door. there, before you, sat a girl at his desk.

or not.

“uh, this is my friend from school, arin. she couldn’t get a flight home for winter break, so she’s staying here.” soobin explained.

“oh,” you responded with a mix of emotions swirling beneath the surface.

arin extended her hand to you. “hi, it’s so nice to meet you. you must be soobin’s neighbor.”

“and his girlfriend,” you added, declaring your place in the room.

awkward tension hung in the air, a palpable shift in dynamics. as the evening unfolded, you settled into a corner of the room, watching the two converse. your gaze shifted between them, your mind a whirlwind of emotions. you marveled at the ease with which they fell into conversation, recounting stories, laughing. a truly unsettling sight. a pang of envy tugged at your heart.

as the night wore on, their voices became a distant hum to you. you felt like a silent observer, a piece of scenery, fading into the background. you did not plan on watching your boyfriend giggle at someone else’s stories for three hours. you longed for his attention, but that seemed like an impossible request.

soobin, engrossed in his conversation, was too oblivious to your discomfort. it wasn’t that he didn’t care, but rather he was just caught up.

you watched them with a mixture of longing and resignation, trying to convince yourself that this was just a temporary moment of disconnect and that soobin would turn his attention back to you soon. but with each passing minute, that hope waned.

gathering resolve, you got up. “i think i’m going to head home.” you announced.

soobin and arin turned their attention to you, momentarily pulling away from their conversation.

“are you sure?” soobin asked you.

you nodded. “yeah, it’s been a long day. i’ll see you later, soobin. it was nice to meet you, arin.” you turned back to your boyfriend, waiting for his response.

“i’ll walk you home,” he offered.

leaving the room, you couldn’t help but steal a glance back at arin, who was now engrossed in something on her phone. the ache in your chest grew.

the two of you stood in front of your house, the chill of the evening air settling around you. the soft glow from the porch light illuminated the path that led to your front door.

“so, she’s staying the entirety of winter break?” you asked.

“yup,” soobin replied, his words punctuated by a casual pop of the ‘p’. “is there something wrong?”

you hesitated for a moment. “no,” you finally shook your head, a small, rueful smile gracing your lips. “i just wanted to spend time with you alone.”

“we can still spend time together,” he assured. “i feel like you two would get along. she’s a lot like you.”

the reassurance didn’t offer the comfort you sought. instead, it settled uneasily in your stomach. you offered a distracted response, your gaze drifting from the quiet street to your front door.

“yeah, maybe.”

“are you okay?” soobin asked, pulling you back to the present moment.

you forced a smile, masking the swirl of conflicting emotions beneath the surface. “yeah, just tired.”

“okay, goodnight, i’ll see you tomorrow.” he said, leaning down to kiss you. the touch of his lips felt foreign, like a puzzle piece that no longer fit quite right. it was an odd sensation, leaving you with a lingering sense of disconnection. like you were slipping away from each other. you didn’t want to think too much about it, but deep down you knew that no matter how tightly you tried to hold on, it would be no use.

“goodnight,” you whispered, stepping back and slipping into the warmth of your house.

the days that followed were a dance of awkwardness and unspoken tension. you yearned for soobin’s attention, for the familiar touch of his hand, but it just seemed so out of reach.

one chilly afternoon, you all gathered at a small diner on the corner of town. the warm scent of comfort food wrapped around you as you settled into the vinyl booth opposite arin. your boyfriend trailed behind you, hesitating for a moment before sliding into the booth beside you, a subtle shift that did not go unnoticed. it was a tiny pang, but it was there.

you smiled and tried to shake off the unease, focusing on the menu in front of you. as you chatted about school and plans for the break, you couldn’t help but notice soobin’s gaze flickering between the two of you. it was as if he was trying to find balance in a delicate equation.

another time, the three of you planned to visit the ice skating rink. when you arrived at soobin’s house, you were met with the unfamiliar sight of arin in the front seat of the car. you hesitated for a moment, unsure of where to sit. the glance you exchanged with arin held a silent question, but before you could say anything, soobin assured you it wasn’t a big deal.

as the car pulled away, the hum of their conversation and the pulse of the music filled the space, leaving you feeling like a distant observer.

you invited soobin over for a movie night, so imagine your surprise when you opened your front door to see both of them. you smiled dropped as you welcomed them into your house. this was supposed to bring back a flicker of normalcy. you were supposed to nestle into your boyfriend’s side. but even as the movie played, there was a subtle shift in the air. every moment spent with arin was a reminder of the growing distance, like a river slowly widening between you and the person you held closest.

then came that one precious weekend, a rare convergence of circumstances. both of you found your parents out of town at the same time. you invited soobin over and unfortunately, arin was working on a project for school so she couldn’t join. you had to stifle a surge of joy that threatened to bubble over.

“i’m so happy that we’re finally spending time together,” you exclaimed, gently closing your bedroom door behind you. soobin sat on your bed, with your computer resting on his lap. “alone.” you emphasized, a smile playing on your lips.

with purposeful steps, you crossed the room. you carefully lifted the laptop from his lap, placing it on your bedside table. then, with a graceful movement, you straddled his lap, feeling the warmth and familiarity of his presence beneath you.

“i really missed you,” you murmured, your breath mingling with his. leaning in, you captured his lips in a tender kiss.

the room pulsed with newfound energy as the kiss deepened. soobin’s touch was gentle as his hands found their place on the small of your back, holding you close, grounding you in the moment.

as passion ignited between you, a fire that had been smoldering for far too long, you hands moved with purpose, fingers deftly working to remove the barrier that separated you from him.

but then, he pulled away, his breaths coming in measured, uneven intervals. “w-what are you doing?”

“i’m ready,” you replied, your own voice barely above a whisper. the air crackled with tension, every beat of your heart echoing in the silence that followed.

he sat up straighter, his gaze locked with yours. “are you sure?”

“yes, soobin, i’m sure,” you asserted, mustering more confidence. “i want this.”

he took a moment, his breath steadying, before he spoke. “alright,” he said softly.

he gently guided you back onto the bed. “it might be more comfortable if i’m on top,” he suggested. he removed his shirt, casually tossing it to a corner of your room. “please tell me if you want me to stop.”

you nodded in understanding.

“i’m serious, y/n. i need you to tell me if you’re uncomfortable.”

“okay, i will.”

your heart raced as you laid there, your senses heightened. nervous energy tingled through your veins as his hands caressed your sides. his fingers traced the curves of your hips and thighs slowly. every inch of your body lit with flames as he touched you ever so lightly.

slowly, you mirrored his movements, your hands reached for the hem of your t-shirt. with a deep breath, you took off the old t-shirt to match him, laying eagerly in your pretty pink bra.

he stopped to look at you. “wow.” he breathed out. a rush of warmth flooded your cheeks, and you instinctively buried your face in your hands. he pulled your hands down. “don’t hide your face from me, baby.” he murmured with tender eyes. “you’re just so pretty.”

you pulled him down to kiss him. “i need you,” you moaned into the kiss.

soobin’s mouth never left your body as he fumbled with his pants. he licked and sucked on your neck, taking his time with his gray sweatpants. soft moans and sighs kept slipping from your lips as he marked your skin.

“wait,” he stopped. “do you have a condom?”

“top drawer,” you breathed out.

soobin reached into the drawer by the bed, his fingers deftly finding the box nestled amidst an array of trinkets.

“open up for me.” you did as he said, and spread your legs a little wider. he could tell you were nervous as he pulled down your shorts. “do you trust me?” he asked, to which you nodded. “it might hurt for a second, but i promise you, it will only be a tiny amount of pain.” you wrapped your legs around his waist and he slowly rocked his hips against you.

you felt him position his hips so that they were perfectly in line with yours, his tip edging your entrance. he began to work his way into you inch by inch, before steadily pushing in until you were filled with his entire length. he threw his head back in pleasure as he bottomed out in you. your hands still on the back of his neck, you nudged him closer to you. “i know it hurts, baby. i’m sorry. just tell me what you need.”

the pain and discomfort was quickly replaced with pleasure. you gasped quietly, and soobin took it as a sign to finally begin moving. he fell into a rhythm of deep slow thrusts just sent you spiraling. he leaned his face down to your neck for a moment, pressing kisses along your flesh and nipping at your shoulder.

“f-fuck, you feel so good.”

he raised his face again, your noses inches apart. your face was contorted in pleasure and he couldn’t help but groan, thrusting into your harder.

“soobin?” you moaned out.

“yeah, baby? i’m right here.”

“i love you.”

he leaned back down to kiss you, his lips trailing down your jawline to your neck.

every kiss, every thrust progressively getting faster was sending you over the edge, making you pant and moan underneath him. the sounds coming from you were making his head spin and he could feel himself getting closer to his orgasm.

he was hitting you in the right spot, causing a knot to form in your lower stomach as you approached your breaking point. the knot in your stomach tightened and snapped. your walls spasmed and clenched around him as you released all over his cock. your body was shaking from the intensity, as you cried his name out. fueling his organs. his hips stuttered and he joined you in climax.

his movements ceased to slow rolls of his hips before eventually stopping.

soft pants and deep breaths invaded the space and filled the room around you. you stayed like that for a moment, catching your breath. he then carefully pulled out. he held your body close to his chest, his eyes softening as he looked down at your exhausted face.

you nuzzled your head into soobin’s neck, kissing along his jawline. “that was so good.” you said between kisses. soobin responded with a contented hum, his fingers gently rubbing against your arm. the soft rustle of the sheets provided a soothing backdrop to the intimacy you had just shared, cocooning you in a bubble of fleeting bliss

but as the minutes passed, a subtle shift began to settle between you, like a distant tremor foreshadowing an impending quake. soobin’s touch, once tender and reassuring, began to falter. his breath, once steady and calming, now held an undertone of uncertainty.

“i should probably go back home,” soobin said, his arm slowly retreating from around your shoulder. “arin is alone.”

“seriously?” you turned to face him, a mixture of confusion and anger plastered on your face.

“what? she’s a guest.”

“you’re leaving?” you hold onto his arm, desperate to keep him close. “i thought you were going to spend the night.”

“i can’t leave her alone.”

“soobin, i just lost my virginity to you…” your voice trailed off, tears forming in your eyes. your hands dropped to your lap. the room seemed to close in around you, suffocating in its silence.

“y/n–” you could feel your blood boiling.

“don’t.” you shifted away from him on the bed. “i just lost my virginity to you and you want to spend the night with some other girl.”

“i’m not spending the night with her.”

“what’s so special about her?”

“what?”

“why have you chosen to spend every moment of this break with her instead of me?”

“we spend time together.”

“yeah, with her always there.”

the room seemed to hold its breath, the weight of your words settling into the air.

“she’s my friend and i care about her.”

“you care about her?” you asked, your voice barely above a whisper, every word laced with a pain that cut through the silence.

“yes i do. she couldn’t go home for winter break. I just want to make sure she doesn’t feel alone.”

“well what about me?”

“y/n, come on.”

“i told you i loved you.”

“y/n, i–” you could almost hear your heart break. he couldn’t even say it back to you.

you quickly sobered up, your walls rising like a fortress around you. “i think you should leave.”

“hey,” he reached out to hold you, but you swatted his hand away, the touch too little, too late. his fingers hung in the air for a moment before dropping, defeated.

“no. i don’t want you here anymore. you should go home.”

soobin stood up and got dressed. his movements were deliberate and slow as he gathered his scattered clothes. he dressed in silence, every gesture laden with a sense of finality. as he stood by the door, fully dressed, soobin turned to look at you. his eyes held a mixture of regret and longing, a silent plea for understanding that hung in the space between you. you met his gaze, your heart aching with a complex blend of emotions – love, betrayal, and a yearning for something that now felt impossibly distant.

the door creaked open and closed softly, the sound echoing in the hollow space left behind.

putting on a robe, you sat by your window, watching him go into his house, praying, hoping that he would turn around, see you sitting by your window, come back to you. but he just walked into his house, the door closing with a finality that sent a shiver down your spine. your room felt emptier than ever before.

you laid in your bed and let the tears fall freely, each drop a painful release. the weight of reality settled on your chest. a heavy ache seeped into your bones.

the days that followed felt like a slow-motion train wreck. it was as if the color had drained from the world, leaving only shades of gray. every passing moment that you didn’t hear from soobin was a jagged piece of glass, cutting into your soul. each night seemed longer than the last, filled with the silent echo of his absence.

you didn’t even know what hurt more — the raw vulnerability of giving him everything, only to have him leave, or the deafening silence that followed. the unanswered questions swirled like a storm in your mind. why hadn’t he reached out? was he feeling the same heartache that clung to your every breath?

his parents even visited for dinner and you had to paint a smile on your face throughout to hide the storm that raged within. when his mom inquired about your absence, you concocted a tale, your voice steady even though your heart felt like it might shatter.

other than your parents, the only person you spoke to was yuna, who became your lifeline even though she was on vacation with her parents. she was a voice of reason and a source of much-needed laughter. “honestly, fuck him. and fuck her too,” she declared.

“she didn’t even do anything,” you murmured in arin’s defense.

“who the fuck sits in the front seat of someone else’s boyfriend’s car?” yuna fired back, making you chuckle.

"i wish you were here. it's so miserable. i can't even leave my house because i'm scared i'm going to see him," you confessed, your voice a whisper edged with pain.

"if i was there, he'd probably have to file a restraining order against me."

returning to campus was like stepping onto a battlefield, but yuna was determined to wage war against the memories that threatened to engulf you and make you forget about a certain dark haired boy whose name you were no longer allowed to say. “you know what they say: in order to get over someone, you need to get under someone else.” she proclaimed from your closet, picking out something for you to wear tonight.

“i don’t know if i’m ready to get under someone else,” you admitted, fixing your mascara in your bathroom mirror, dressed in your robe.

“doesn’t matter if you actually do. you just need to get your mind off of him.” she hands you a black dress. “wear this. it always looks good on you.”

and so, you allowed yourself to be swept up in a night of bar hopping. the pulsing music and laughter washed over you like a healing balm. for a few precious hours, you were just another college student, drowning your sorrows in neon lights and thumping bass.

between the nights out, you threw yourself completely into your studies, the pursuit of a summer internship becoming your north star. you came to school to do something, and you weren’t going to let your heartache consume you.

spring was always a happy time for you. the air was warm, carrying with it the promise of renewal. it had been months since you had thought about soobin, and even longer since you had seen him. for the first time since that unfortunate night, you felt like you were completely over him. or at least getting there.

as you strolled back to your dorm from class, the world hummed with a quiet energy. the sun hung low in the sky and the air was soft and warm against your skin. but then you saw a familiar silhouette leaning against your dorm building. time seemed to stretch in that moment, the world around you fading into a blur. your heart quickened its pace, a staccato beat echoing in your chest.

"y/n," he breathed, his voice a soft plea that hung in the air. his presence was a sudden gust of wind, stirring the carefully constructed walls around your heart.

your guard was up, a fortress of steel around your heart. you wouldn't let him waltz back into your life just to tear you apart again. "what are you doing here?" you demanded, your voice steady despite the turmoil within.

"i wanted to talk to you."

"how did you find my address?"

"your mom gave it to my mom, who gave it to me."

you let him into your building, signing him in with the security guards in the front. the familiar surroundings now felt foreign with him there. in the confines of your dorm room, he looked around, his gaze grazing over the familiar details that now seemed foreign.

“you said you wanted to talk. so talk.” you said to him sitting down. you were so grateful that your roommate had gone to class. you really didn’t need her to be in the room with you now.

he glanced around, his face marked with uncertainty. “i don’t know where to start.”

you met his gaze without a word.

“i guess… i could start with sorry.” he offered with a nervous chuckle.

“i think that’s too little, too late, soobin.” you asserted, matter of factly.

“i miss you.”

“you can’t keep saying that.” your shoulders sunk. looking at him now, you could feel all the emotions bubbling back up — the anger, the hurt, the tears, they were all coming back to you.

“i know, but it’s true.” he rushed to add. “that’s why i came here. i wanted to see you. i know we didn’t leave things the right way.”

“soobin, you were the first person i ever had sex with and you left me right after.” you tried to keep your cool and maintain your composure, but it was getting increasingly harder.

“i-i know. i’m sorry,” he stammered, remorse filling his eyes.

“is that all you came here to say? sorry?” he looked at you apologetically, offering no further words. “you hurt me so much and you couldn’t even say anything to me afterwards. i waited every day for months to see if you would ever call me and you didn’t. it was like i meant nothing to you. it was just so easy for you to forget that i existed.” as the words flowed, you felt a strange mixture of relief and sadness wash over you. the wounds were still fresh, but there was a catharsis in finally addressing the unspoken.

“i’m s—” he stopped himself. “i know i hurt you. i don’t know what i can do to make it right.”

“i don’t think there’s anything you can do to make it right.” you said, wiping the slow tears from your face. you sat up, meeting his gaze squarely. “i spent our entire relationship fighting for you to pay attention to me. i can’t do that anymore. i don’t want to beg someone to care about me.”

“i care about you. you know that.”

“do i?”

“i didn’t think this conversation would go like this if i’m being completely honest.”

“i’m not angry at you anymore. at least i’m trying not to be.” you tell him. “and i don’t hate you, if you thought i did. i don’t think i could ever hate you.”

“i don’t think i can’t not have you in my life.”

“i’m still your neighbor.” you joked.

“it’s not the same.” he admitted quietly, sitting beside you. “y/n, i love you.”

“soobin–” you turned to face him, searching his eyes for any sign that he understood the depth of your pain.

“i know, it’s too late. i just wanted you to know.” his gaze fixed on his hands, fingers tracing invisible patterns on his jeans. “i can’t erase the past. but i want to try to make amends, to find a way back to some semblance of… of friendship, maybe.”

friendship. the word hung in the air, a fragile bridge between your shared history and the uncertain future.

“i don’t know if we can be friends. not right now, at least. maybe not ever.”

he looked up, pain etched in the frown lines across his face. “i understand,” he murmured, voice heavy with regret.

silence enveloped, broken only by the distant sounds of life outside. after what felt like an eternity, you finally spoke, your voice softer now. “i think i need time. to you know, figure out my shit.”

he nodded. “i want you to know that i’m sorry. truly.”

“i know.”

with a heavy heart, you walked him to the door. as he left, you closed the door behind him, leaning against it for support. alone in the quiet of your dorm, you let the tears come. finally you had a release of all the emotions long held in check. you had tried your hardest to bury them, but now it was time for them to finally come out. the pain was still there, but with each tear that fell, you felt a small measure of healing begin.

in the days that followed, you took each moment as it came, allowing yourself to grieve for what was lost and to slowly rediscover the strength within you. spring continued to dance outside, and you vowed to find your own renewal.

taglist: @boba-beom @dearlyjun @atinyniki @makoto @bunnie-hq @wiisoob @isabellah29 @pluviophile-xxx

fill out this form to join my taglist! author's note :: finally edited!! classic quintessential fay angst!! we're so back!! I wrote this story over the course of two months. it is the longest thing I have written so far and I am super proud of it. please lmk if I missed any warnings or have any typos. I really hope you enjoyed it

#fay's works #txt angst #txt fluff #choi soobin #soobin fluff #soobin angst #soobin x reader #soobin #choi soobin fluff #choi soobin angst #soobin smut #choi soobin smut #txt smut

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seirindono · 4 months ago

Text

TMS - Author's note (Arc 1)

Today I'm stepping up to talk about TMS for a while. It's going to be a lot of blah blah, no TLDR, so hang in there or save it for later if you're brave enough, haha (¯▿¯)

So, another chapter of TMS draws to a close, with the difference that this time it's a whole saga that's coming to an end! That's a big relief for me, given that we recently celebrated the comic's 4th anniversary! That's almost the entire duration of my college life, and that's both an impressive and terrifying achievement lol.

The comic is divided into 3 arcs, each separated by an interlude. The first runs from part 1 to 8, with 201 pages total (wow!). In it, you are introduced to Mel, a young skeleton with a rather unclear past, who accidentally arrives in a a foreign timeline, along with other well known skeletons. Nowadays it's just an isekai haha. Throughout the arc, she proves to be a cautious Monster, quiet and somewhat withdrawn compared to the other skeletons we come across, notably Rus, Blue and Axe, who each got their own sequences.

Still, Mel in the last few scenes is starting to show more initiative, and the interlude will make this even more obvious, but we can expect her to open up a lot more during the next Arc, about her past, motives, goals and thoughts.

I could go on at length about what's in store for us in the interlude, but given that it's due for release sometime in 2024, I'm going to talk about the general story line instead. Although we follow Mel who is foreign to what's going on in this universe prior to her arrival, the other characters and events suggest that strange phenomena are taking place in Ebott, leading many people to become embroiled in a highly unusual affair. Crossing timelines, earthquakes, mysterious apparitions in the forest, something is afoot and the situation seems to be at a turning point when Mellow gets here.

Everyone has their own way of dealing with the situation and what to do next. Some are serious and pragmatic, like Black, others optimistic, like Blue, and others, like Papyrus, find themselves completely backed into a corner, forced to do their best to fix whatever needs to be.

A special case, however, is Axe, whom Mel meets in the forest as she investigates Mt. Ebott. The two have diametrically opposed views of their current condition. One wants to return to her world by any means necessary, regardless of the advantages of a peaceful world. The other, not so much. Both refuse to talk about their past and ignore the other's circumstances, but a sense of familiarity drives them to try to convince the other to stay or go. These are two stark positions to reconcile, and while we can expect Blue and the other skeletons to have their own views on the subject too, Mel and Axe are strangely "committed" in this interraction and resort to violence, spurred on by a unknown substance that causes Axe to momentarily lose control.

Mel is wounded, Axe unconscious, and the status quo disrupted. Other consequences follow this confrontation, and several questions are raised: Can Blue really help Mel when Axe accuses him of having already given up on going home himself? What is this mysterious entity Axe came across a few days earlier? The vibrations? What was that substance that made him go berserk? And what made him stop? Can we trust Mel and what she tells us? And many others.

Because as I'm sure many of you have come to realize, Mel has proven to be a rather unreliable narrator (or at least character since you don't follow her actual POV). Blatantly lying or omitting facts to others and readers alike, it's hard to know her next move and whether she's genuinely forgotten important infos (for it's well established at this stage that she has hazy memories and that they continue to deteriorate. The same applies to her health).

In the same way, each part of TMS so far has raised more questions than it has answered, but I can confidently say that the road is paved for Arc 2 to answer and put in perspective most of them, ahah.

Ah, this is also the moment when I can announce that ALL skeletons will be featured in the Interlude. Should be. Hopefully.

I'd also like to point out a few narrative changes for Act 2! The central characters, in particular. Original cast characters such as Undyne, Metatton and a veiled character will be more formally introduced, but we'll also meet up with characters we've already bumped into, but in a much more concrete way, such as Frisk and Alphys. I can't wait for you to get to know them! You can also expect more pov changes, more elipses and so on. Things are moving fast.

But that begs the question. When is it due? As said before, the first Arc lasted 4 years and I'm entering my last (and most crucial) year of college. I still don't know if I'll have time to get much of it done in 2025, but on the other hand, I'd like to strike while the iron's hot lest TMS be discontinued after a 1-year hiatus and my entry into the working world. Student loan, life and all. There are still plenty of things I'd like to bring to this project, and I now have the skills to actually carry them out, but on the other hand, the time involved has also increased exponentially.

Tbh with you, as an animation student, it's been one of my dreams since 2020 to do one of TMS's sequences in animatic or full anim, or even a trailer for the comic! But as a solo team, it's just unreasonable and I know it. But the parasite ----. Don't get me wrong, I could, but it would take me months and it's just not realistic when 80% of my time has to go into professionnal work that goes into my portefolio or adult stuff. I can't affort to invest time in solo-ing it or to recruit and lead a team over one side project of mine ( ´ ▿ ` ) So we'll most likely stick to classic pages.

But the same goes for collabs, community events, side stories, asks, edits, dubs, testing other platforms, regular animatics. Love all of that. Really. But I never have the time to because, man, I'd love to actually finish TMS someday ahah. It all comes back to the age-old problem of “lots of ideas, little time”, and it's so frustrating but, it's a choice I have to stick to, so bear with me as I vent my frustration. Just for tonight (´ ∀ `, *)

So, yes. Act 2. Next year? Probably? It's a long interlude, so you'll get smth in the meantime, but it's likely to decide the future of TMS and whether Act 2 sees the light of day as I imagine it or if...well, something else replaces it.

bringing back this doodle cuz it seems fiting lol

Anyway, I also wanted to thank you for your engagement with Part 8!

I don't know how other comic artists experience it, but for me it's a very isolated work, and as much as I love working alone, I enjoy the interaction with readers most of all.

Seeing people losing their mind over a serious scene, or chuckling at a dumb gag, or just simping over the characters and art. It's just great, and very rewarding. Likewise, I have a blast answering questions about the TMS universe, reading tags and receiving memes, witnessing people go increasingly mad with messages full of indecipherable screams and hearts. Makes me giggle and kick my feet everytime and I can't wait to drop the next lore bomb or funny scene bwahahah

And while we're on the subject, I'd like to say a special word of thanks to the legions of rebloggers who make it their business to spread the word about TMS. You sweet, lovely, candy scented folks. And to my dear mutuals - with whom I interact objectively so little - who have no idea how a single message or note from them drives me bonkers. Thanks for dropping by. And of course to my super Patreons who support me despite the sparse updates, but to whom I'm more than grateful. Love you all.

Sounds like a farewell message. It's not lol. Just making sure they get the love they deserve.

The post is getting long and I'm kind of done pretending I know how to write organized notes so to wrap things up, here's an exhaustive list of what I'd like to get done this year and/or discuss in more detail another day. •Make a new masterpost (for Act 2) •Analyze/Comment certain sequences from Act 1 to clarify or give context •Redraw and rewrite part 1 and 2 •Make more bonus content again *ahahahahahaha*

•Re open or close the Discord (partially abandoned and it's all on me, but I'm still mulling it over).

•Finish the Interlude and enjoy and nice hiatus

And that's about it? Congratulation for reading this and making it this far! You were there!

Be well, and see you next time.

Seirin-

First part | Prev | Next (INTERLUDE)

Ko-fi | Patreon | Comic | Commissions | To support the comic

#txt #seirin talks #the missing scarf #author's note #lots of rambling but that's what those are for aren't they #a day to celebrate wo~hooo #this is a save point if you're reading the comics - take a break

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carryonafi · 5 months ago

Note

hi my sweet baby angel— been thinkin about fonda!luke a lot recently… was wondering if you could write a little cute/smutty ‘i’m so fuckin proud of you’ blurb that takes place after his ono? do whatever you want with it, i know you’ll do great bby <3

only the brave.

luke hemmings x reader; SMUT!!!🔞

a/n: HELLO finally getting to some requests! starting with one from my dear souperbloom 😋 she’s already gotten a few little snippets but shh we don’t talk about that. ANYWAY here’s only the brave featuring fonda night 1 lukey pookie :3

words: 2.6k

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

Luke was always in his element when he performed, but it was always surrounded by the others that he shone. Knowing him, you would have never thought he could have done this on his own. Not that you didn’t have the faith, but it was how often he spoke about feeling alone when he wasn’t standing by his best friends.You were currently standing backstage with him, in the dressing room before his first ever solo show with a full house of guests and the next night hopefully bound to be a wonderful repeat due to the unexpected high demand of the first night.

“How do you feel?” You said softly, the room silent other than the outside noises of the crew moving around the pre-show playlist in the background.

“I think I’m gonna throw up.” Luke sighed, tipping his head back against the door, he did look sort of pale, but he usually seemed that way.

The look on his face softened a bit once you reached out to take his hands.

“You’ll be okay… do your vocal warmups. That helps doesn’t it?” A weak suggestion, but it was a thoughtful attempt that made Luke crack a smile.

“I dunno.” He admitted, his expression turning back to normal once he really started to think again. You could understand how he felt, knowing him for years and seeing how much stage anxiety he went through even with the others around.

“They’re gonna be watching too, y’know? All you have to do is look up at the balcony.” As much as you tried to make him feel better, you knew that nothing would truly ease him. The thought of looking up to see you and his best friends made him feel a little bit better for the moment, that was until a crew member shouted for call time. Luke’s face dropped again.

“You’re going to be amazing, okay? You always are.” You offered a weak smile, getting one back as Luke leaned in to press a gentle kiss to your lips.

He looked like he was about to say something in reply, but instead, he bit his tongue and took the encouragement instead of plaguing it with his doubts. “Thank you.” He said gratefully, leading you out of the dressing room and parting ways once he got to the wings and you left to join the crowd.

The lights went down and the last song on the playlist ended, you took a deep breath suddenly feeling anxious for Luke now as well — but as you said. He was always amazing.

Security walked you up to the balcony, a few stray fans at the back of the general admission floor whispered to themselves and happily waved as you walked by and made your way up to where the others were standing. Michael turned around as he felt your presence join them, giving you a look through the darkness.

“He’s okay?” He asked, seemingly responding to the anxiety taking over your entire expression.

“He should be, just nervous to be up there without you guys.” You gave him the simplest answer possible, knowing how it described the last hour or so of sitting in the dressing room and trying to talk Luke down from walking straight back out to the car… or throwing up. He was very close to both of those scenarios.

—

Just as you told him, all of that encouragement and gentle words to get his hopes up, he played a really good show and seemed to be feeling incredible by the end of it. You left the rest of Luke’s friends just at the end of the last song so you could meet him backstage, and it was the best decision you could’ve made. It was obvious that he needed to see you after that.

He picked up his head once he tossed his last pick into the crowd and headed backstage, a smile gracing his features illuminated by the few and far bright lights in the otherwise dark venue. It was too hard to resist the temptation to smile as well, rushing forward and throwing yourself into his arms.

“See, you did amazing!” You squealed happily against his shoulder, Luke’s heart was racing and you could feel it relax significantly as you stood there and held him for a moment. He breathed out a long sigh of relief, nearly tearing his in-ears out with one hand while the other snaked around your waist to hold you tight. He needed this. He needed nothing more than your arms enveloping his physical worries and making him feel like he just won the Olympics.

“Thank you… Thank you so much.” Luke whispered against your hair, pressing repeated kisses to the side of your head and not stopping even when you tilted your head to look at him. Instead he just went with it, kissing your face until he finally reached your lips. He teased a little, kissing the corner of your mouth which had you giggling and grabbing his cheeks so he couldn’t move. You planted an aggressively loving kiss to his lips, the sensation of his growing smile making it hard to hold it.

“I’m very proud of you, so fuckin’ proud of you, Luke.” You replied in that same tone he used earlier, a wider grin spreading across Luke’s face as he started to walk you backwards towards the dressing room again.

“Don’t think I could’ve done it without you.” He muttered like it was a secret, quickly pecking your lips once more with his hands splayed out on your back so you didn’t walk into anything.

“Bullshit.” You scrunched up your nose, Luke shook his head then turned you around.

“No, no. I definitely couldn’t have.” He played back despite your protest, leading you into the small room and closing the door.

You sat on one side of the small sofa while Luke shed himself of his gear and slipped off his suit jacket which left him in the matching brown vest, your eyes roamed, scanned each little part of his body. His wrists shoulder blades flexing as he tried to rid the exhaustion of performing which was mostly masked by adrenaline. Luke saw you in the mirror, smiling back at you as a simple wave of your hand gestured for him to come closer. He didn’t let a beat go by, he obeyed and slowly approached you.

“Wanna go back home, or sit and decompress for a while?” You asked, placing your legs in his lap and playing with his sweaty curls.

“Mm, decompress. Don’t wanna move.” He hummed, an arm curling under your thighs and pulling you closer to him. Even past the warmth and exertion, he needed to feel you. Your warmth.

The dressing room was quiet, peaceful as Luke came down and basked in his glory of a first solo performance. Usually, there would be some sort of music playing, 3 other guys messing around and celebrating yet another amazing night… but it was just Luke. You and Luke.

“I’m proud of you.” You repeated, catching Luke’s attention away from the loose thread in your outfit. His lips quirked into a crooked smile, the smile that made the high points of his cheeks glow with joy. He thought for a moment before nodding, gently squeezing your thigh.

“I’m proud of me, too.” Luke agreed, the glitter smeared across his eyelids had managed to spread on his face. You reached forward to brush some away, but he took this opportunity to catch your waiting lips in another soft kiss.

Your hand moved slowly on his cheek, fingertips catching the underside of his jaw and keeping him close for just a fleeting second more. Until your lips broke apart, it wasn’t known who did it, but all you knew was that Luke was leaning in for more. His lips were forced against yours again with much more, newfound fervor as his free arm hooked around your middle.

It was nearly silent from there on, just gentle kissing and featherlight touches which spoke more volume than any rough make out session, any bedroom session — the adrenaline pumping through Luke’s veins and the events of the night had him on a high.

“C’mere…” He murmured against your kiss-swollen lips, a pout on his own as he hoisted you into his lap and nearly forced you to straddle him.

“Really?” You teased, letting out a breathy laugh as Luke licked his lips and admired his own hands exploring your body. Slipping into the waistband of your bottoms and watching the goosebumps form on your skin at his warmth.

“We’ve never done this after a show before, please?” He pleaded, looking up at you through mascara coated eyelashes which pushed you to give into him.

“As long as you can make it quick.” You hushed in response, just as Luke’s hands disappeared under your skirt and delicately brushed the soft skin of your inner thighs. He nodded, slowly taking his hands off of you to unbutton those annoying, high waisted slacks that he had really been obsessed with. They were hard to shuffle down with you in his lap, so you decided to help him out by lifting your hips a little.

“Made it easy by wearing that..” Luke gave as an affectionate note, making it clear that the skirt was a good option— a great option.

“Easy access?” You grinned, his pupils dilating at the sight of your underwear slowly slipping down your legs and leaving the underneath to his imagination beneath the skirt, Luke hummed in agreement, his hands returning to spread themselves across your hips and bring you even closer. It was barely possible.

“You’re annoying.” He whispered, his eyes turning soft and desperate as your hips came into contact.

“What? How so?” You gasped, tone full of mirth as you witnessed Luke slowly losing control over being so close to you. Every single time, without fail he was always going to get to that breaking point of desperation and you loved it.

“You jus’ have to look so pretty all the time, it’s annoying — I gotta hold it all in.” Luke replied, moving forward to bury his face in your neck and leave needy, wet kisses on your skin. “Have t’ share you with everyone… they all look at you, baby.” He rambled into your neck, lips and tongue dragging over your skin in a soft haste to get to his favorite parts of you. Luke ended his trail of destruction with one gentle kiss to your chest, right above the center where he rested his curly little head in defeat. Defeat of falling victim to you.

“Don’t have to share me with anyone, silly boy.” You laughed, hands carding through his hair and massaging his dark roots. “I’m all yours.” You said gently, careful of Luke’s fragile mind where he often struggled.

However, you were caught off guard by the switch he took. Luke peeked his head up, pushing up into your hands like he was a puppy desperate for love, but slipped himself inside you in one flawless motion. It left you breathless, Luke beaming with satisfaction as you took him.

“All mine?” He breathed, ring-clad fingers tightening on your hips and indenting the flesh beneath his hands. All that came out of you was a weak sigh of pleasure, coaxing you to sink down further and devour inch by inch. Luke was waiting for an answer, so you nodded and hummed appreciatively which seemed to be more than enough for him. His hips slowly started to move, leaning back against the couch to watch the obscenity before him. Anyone could walk into this dressing room, anyone could see you perched on his lap and know within seconds what was going on under the fluff of your skirt. Just the sounds you were making with each caring and generous roll of his hips had him imagining the scenarios of someone hearing you. It was a low chance, but hell, was it daunting.

“So.. So goddamn proud.” You looked down at Luke, admiring how he had reached and let one button on his vest go to expose more of his chest.

“Uh huh, you’re proud?” He raised his eyebrows, the rise and fall of his chest as his breathing picked up driving you both just a little more crazy for each other.

The simplicity of your nod made Luke smile, knowing that he had taken your words away and left you so focused on the rhythm he had pumping in and out of you. But he was close too, losing control but not nearly as weak as you.

“Luke!” You gasped when his pace changed, he was now focused on chasing his own pleasure once he was secure in the fact that you would be finishing before him. This made it all come crashing down, little pulses and shocks through your nerves, thighs twitching as you clamped down hard and bit your knuckles to keep yourself quiet.

“Hey…” Luke breathed, taking your hand away from your mouth as your orgasm smoothly washed over you. “Don’t hurt my girl.” He gave you a crooked half-smile, his hips stuttering which told that he was there. Right there, letting out that deep groan and leaning forward to press his face against your collarbone as he pumped deep inside you, His curls tickled your neck, slicked with sweat from the activities within the humid dressing room.

It was about two minutes until you each didn’t feel like jello anymore, you felt a smile of post-orgasm bliss creeping up on you which turned into giggles.

“Fuckin’ love you so much.” You sighed dreamily, tangling a hand in Luke’s hair and gently coaxing him to look up at you. The glitter from his eyes was now on your neck, and somehow his nose— you examined his flushed face with care and graced a loving peck to his nose.

“Love you more.” Luke barely managed past his own smile, waiting a few more moments to spare the gentle touches and soft kisses from you. It felt like so long until he could finally get you home… but home was just half an hour away, more of those kisses in a much better environment were waiting for him. “This was a really great reward,” he mumbled, shy like some schoolboy.

“Oh yeah?” You chuckled, mindlessly fixing the buttons of his vest and watching as he returned to picking at some loose thread on your top. Luke nodded, giving you the loving eyes shielded by his impressively long eyelashes. “Imagine what kind of reward you’ll get when you finish a solo tour.”

“I can’t even begin.” Luke grinned back, hoisting you up from the couch once you were all situated and ready to face as many people as you possibly needed to. Hopefully not a lot, if Luke was counting right. Security, staff, driver…

“There’s fans waiting out back, wanna go see them?” You suggested, grasping Luke’s hand as you headed out of the venue and strides hastily through the backstage halls. You knew what Luke’s answer was going to be, the hesitance to go back and show his fans some appreciation would be the nice thing to do. However, tomorrow was another show. They could wait and have some hope for him until the next night.

“Nah, just wanna go home.” He admitted, blinking down at you in the dim light to adjust and focus clearly on your face. You were now also covered in his glitter, and it was truly a sight for him. One that he would be sad to wash off at home, but maybe there was more in it for him if he was extra gentle with your cleanser.

#5sos fanfic #ashton irwin #luke hemmings #5 seconds of summer #calum hood #michael clifford #5sos smut #5sos x reader #5sos one shot #luke hemmings x reader #luke hemmings smut

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glossdebut · 28 days ago

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PRICE OF FAME | MYG ★ CH. 1 TEASER

✧ PAIRING: yoongi x fem!reader

✧ SUMMARY: You were about ready to give up, your career nowhere near what you dreamed it’d be when you started at eighteen, bright-eyed and naive. Reality for you these past few years has consisted of pouting at a camera, ignoring whispers of your name at company events, and ensuring that the stupid, tiny designer purses they keep forcing on you can at least carry a flask. But now, you’re helping a friend in need. For the first time in a long time, it feels like you’re doing something worthwhile with your life. Too bad Min Yoongi, the newest thorn in your side, seems insistent on stopping you. 『 series masterlist 』

✧ TEASER WARNINGS: none!

✧ NOTES: aaaah!!! i was going to wait a little while to drop this but i couldn't resist. consider this an introduction to the boys! i hope that this is a suitable teaser to kick off the series. this teaser is un-beta'd thus far, so wording is subject to change when i reach the editing stage. please feel free to sound off in the replies or my inbox with thoughts/questions! <3

✧ TEASER WORDCOUNT: 733 words

✧ STATUS: ch. 1 scheduled to drop on nov. 6, 2024!

With a flash of lights and a cacophony of sound, Burn The Stage launches into their first song on the setlist. The crowd roars around you, but you’re not here as a fan, so you try to remember everything Jeongguk taught you in preparation for tonight.

If you weren’t already close, most everything there is to learn about Jeon Jeongguk himself could easily be found with a simple Naver search.

Not only is Jeongguk the lead vocalist and rhythm guitarist of Burn The Stage, but he’s also the de facto face of the band, and he couldn’t be better suited for the job. He’s beautiful. Like, seriously beautiful. Well-built and knows it, sings songs about love and sex and anger with the sweetest voice known to man, covered in tattoos and piercings that eommas everywhere pretend to disapprove of when they’re actually ogling just as much as their daughters. He’s a teenage girl’s wet dream, and with that comes hordes of them using the deductive skills of the NIS to figure out the last time he took a shit. Very little in his life is a secret, whether he likes it or not.

The rest of the band, in turn, gets the luxury of a little bit of mystery.

Park Jimin, drummer, and Kim Taehyung, bassist. Jeongguk’s best friends in the world. You’ve met them both in passing before, at industry events here and there, and they both seemed nice enough.

Jimin has a bit of a reputation for being temperamental, angry, but the way Jeongguk describes him paints him as something gentle. Childhood friends who’ve known each other since scraped knees and runny noses.

It’s public knowledge that Jimin wanted to be a dancer, before this—that when he was in college, he suffered an injury that ended his dancing career before it even started. One moment he was one of the most promising ballet students in Seoul, and the next he was retired at nineteen. He doesn’t like to talk about it, but every time the band is interviewed the question is inevitably asked. Do you have any regrets? You’ve watched the videos, seen the way he shakes with anger even as he answers with a saccharine smile. You have a feeling getting along with Jimin won’t pose any challenges for you. You know a thing or two about regrets.

Taehyung is a bit harder to figure out, but not in any way that sparks concern. He’s just an interesting guy that way.

He was the last to join the band, the first to answer a ‘BASS PLAYER NEEDED’ ad posted around the city. Apparently, he was so good that they didn’t feel the need to call anyone else.

He lives in his own world, does his own thing. Posts very artistic photodumps on his Instagram with concerningly cryptic captions. He’s quiet when he’s around people he doesn’t know, but when he’s put in a room with Jimin and Jeongguk he becomes the loudest person there. He’s kind, caring, always seems to know the right thing to say even if it’s delivered in the strangest manner possible.

Jimin and Taehyung won’t cause any problems for you. Jeongguk assured you that they’d be easy to win over, that as long as Jeongguk likes you, you’re in with them.

The real wild card is the guitarist. Min Yoongi.

According to Jeongguk, Burn The Stage wouldn’t even exist if it weren’t for Yoongi. When the band formed, they were just dumb kids with a shared dream, but Yoongi was the one to set it all in motion.

When they didn’t have anywhere to practice, Yoongi convinced the ajumma he worked for to let him cram as much equipment as he could fit into a tiny noraebang room. When venues wouldn’t book them without the guarantee that they would draw a crowd, Yoongi burned hundreds of CDs and stood on the streets of Hongdae begging people to listen. When shady entertainment companies started offering them laughable contracts, Yoongi found Namjoon and somehow convinced him to manage them for dirt cheap. When they finally got an offer worth taking, Yoongi made them mull it over for as long as they possibly could. Weigh the pros and cons and decide if it was what they really wanted.

If Jeongguk is the face of the band, Yoongi is the heart. Unfortunately for you, this particular heart is very well-guarded.

✧ TAGLIST: @jajabro @pitchblack0309 @sugar-snap @ot72025 @ktownshizzle @futuristicenemychaos @tea4sykes @sugainmybowl

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lilghostiequinni · 6 months ago

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His Dancer

Main Masterlist Lando Masterlist

Pairing: Exotic dancer!female oc (RaeLeigh;Ravenna) x Lando Norris

Warnings: Fluffy (in the relationship), Strip club, Mature themes, Implied smut

Summary: Max takes Lando to a strip club, not expecting him to fall in love with the dancer he paid for. It was never thought to last; not many had known her, and those who did were few. No one knew what she did, but nothing can stay hidden for long.

Requested: NO / yes

Max brought Lando to a strip club for winning the Miami Grand Prix, the first win of the Briton's career in Formula One.

Max paid one of the dancers to take Lando into the back after a dance.

What Max doesn't expect is to go to Lando's hotel room to find the dancer from the night before leaving the room as he goes to knock.

The dancer offers a smile as she leaves through the door and down the hall.

"You brought her back last night?" He asks as he sees Lando make his way to the door.

"Yeah, I guess so. I had to wait until she got off," Lando then just turns and walks back into the suite as Max follows.

Max chuckles at his friend's admittance of having to wait.

There wasn't much Lando could do after he was told to enjoy himself for the night; it also didn't help what Max did, paying for a stripper to give him a lap dance and then to the back room.

It's no surprise that Lando waited all night until 2am, when her shift ended.

"What's your name?" She asked when she walked over to Lando.

When she sat across his lap, and he answered, "Lando."

"Oh, are we celebrating?" She asked him as she dragged her finger down his partially opened shirt.

"Yes, what is your name," Lando asks her, watching her face rather than the finger she moved lower and lower.

"Call me Ravenna, Lando," Even the way she said his name was enticing above all else. Lando just got lost in the woman on his lap.

"Your friend over there said that you needed a dance," Ravenna says to the man, hands now to herself, dragging them along her own body.

Lando was entranced and just nodded at Ravenna, not speaking a word because he was left speechless by her beauty.

After his dance, she stands and holds her hand out to Lando, which he takes, and leads him through the masses of people to the back, where Lando gets his own private show.

When he returns to the main area, he finds Max, who smiles at him and just pats his shoulder.

"Please welcome your favorite, her last night here before she jumps ship to Europe, Ravenna Quince!" The announcer says as the whole sense of the club changes, with many cheers.

By the time Ravenna has walked off the stage, she has no clothes on her being as she walks off the stage, throwing one last look into the crowd before she is out of sight, particularly at Lando.

Max leaves about 1am, leaving Lando to himself as he's taken most of Ravenna's attention for the night.

When her shift ends an hour later, she's walked out the door of the club only to find Lando waiting for her next to an Uber.

"I want to take you back with me."

"Yeah, that's not how it works," Raveena tells him as she goes to move away.

"Please, I know that it's crazy, but just tonight, I won my first Grand Prix in my 6th year of Formula One. Just one chance," Lando basically pleads while holding out his hand.

"Alright, just one pretty boy," She says as she grabs his hand.

Lando pulls her in and kisses her, "Ravenna." He says he pulls back.

"My name is Rae," She whispers as she pulls him in again before the Uber driver honks.

It doesn't take long for Rae to become important to Lando, and it doesn't take long for the opposite.

RaeLeigh quickly falls for the British driver, and by the end of the championship, they're dating, in secret of course.

In the 2025 season, Lando is pulling a strong game, gaining even more attention, and in an interview, he accidentally reveals his relationship with Rae to the world.

Media is a frenzy; that is what it becomes.

But with the publicity comes fans digging into past things and places that had been put down.

Rae had become a dancer to pay bills and as a means to save up for college; the night she met Lando, her life was already changing.

When fans learn of her past in dancing, most say she was in the wrong and was only with Lando for the money.

Just hours after fans started to bully his girlfriend, Lando posts about how true fans wouldn't bully the person who makes him truly happy.

He talks about how that's in the past, and they don't even know the true reasons for her being a dancer, only the rumors and theories that where untrue and thoughtless.

But something else about the day is the day Lando proposed after only a year because Rae truly was the light of his life in any situation and storyline, in any reality or universe.

A/N: I'm tired, but I'm going to do this; not quite how I wanted it to go, but oh well. Also, the photo at the top will be up later after I've slept. As will the rest of the F1 one-shots.

Tags: @poppyflower-22 @samantha-chicago @barcelonaloverf1life @tallrock35 @hellothere9597

If you want to be removed from a tag list, let me know so I don't keep tagging you. If you are striked through, I don't know if you want to be tagged, but just let me know if you want me to continue or stop

#lando norris #formula 1 #f1 #ln4 #mclaren #lando norris x reader #lando imagine #lando norris fanfic #lando norris fluff #lando norris imagine #lando norris x oc #lando norris x you #lando x reader

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thelittleliars · 1 year ago

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Bodyguard

Natasha Romanoff x fem!Reader

Warnings: anxiety/panic attack, alcohol, drunkness

Words: 3.3k

Summary: you are Natasha's bodyguard at a Comic Convention

AN: Hi everyone! Had this cute little idea in my head for a month or two and now it's finally yours!

Camera flashes shone into your faces, fans who were crying and screaming rang into your ears to the point it hurt to. Fans were pushing until people fell to the ground and got hurt. This was madness.. everything was just pure chaos. You were mad at the convention organizers, they either should have hired more security or simply sold less tickets. You were one of Natasha Romanoff's bodyguards for public events gor year already and not a single event had been as fucked up as this one. Yes conventions were an entire different story then red carpets or pride events but it still could have been all avoided if the organizers wouldn't have been so greedy.

Three other bodyguards of her and you tried to get Natasha from the entrance to the backstage area. But you moved in a snail pace since a tons of fans blocked every way to reach for the Black Widow. "Move out of the way!" You yelled over the loud noise. The disrespect of these people really got under your skin, you got extremely angry but you tried not to push the people harshly. You felt Natasha's small frame pressed against your back as you guys made your way through the large crowd. And since you knew her well, you knew in right that moment she was full of anxiety and most likely on the brink of an anxiety/panic attack. "IF YOU DON'T MOVE OUT THE WAY THEN NOBODY GETS TO SEE THE BLACK WIDOW AT ALL TODAY!" You threatened them. Something with the way you yelled it must had struck with a bunch of people since they backed off quickly afterwards. You soon could move smoothly towards the backstage entrance, where you made sure that Natasha was alright by guiding her to mimic your breaths. When that didn't work you tried another method. "What things do you see five times?" You asked her. She looked around. "I see five chairs." You continued with four things she saw. "Four pens." The two continued counting down. Three tables. Two doors. One apple. When you felt she was pretty alright you lead her to one of the chairs and brought a water bottle. "Here drink this."

Natasha appreciated you as her bodyguard so much, not only because you her only female bodyguard but also since you were the only one who always made sure that she was alright and if that weren't the case you helped and comforted her until she was her old self. "Thank you." You nodded your before kneeling in front of her, taking one free hand in yours and looked into her green eyes. Natasha still looked distraught from being mobbed but being with you helped her immensely. She concentrated on the feeling of your warm hand along with how they both fit so wonderful together. It made her heart clench with want. She actually longed to be closer to you, being her bodyguard was not enough for her anymore. The want to feel your touch every second of the day was consuming her thoughts, she also wished to know what your lips felt like on hers. But before she could think further you brought her out of those thoughts. "Are you good to continue the schedule at this convention today?" You asked with worry in your voice. It's another thing Natasha liked about you, you were a stone cold front for everyone but her. For her you were such a softie and always so goddamn gentle, it drove her insane. "Only with you by my side."

"Of course! That's what I'm being paid for." You teased her. "The autograph sessions are gonna be so fun so much fun." The evil smile on your face was something the Black Widow rarely saw but she knew you wouldn't do anything but sitting next to her and looking at the people in line who probably would be squirming underneath your gaze. That alone brought you joy and she knew that. After you guys met up with the other Avengers, they all went on stage and answered a bunch of questions from the interviewer and fans. It went smoothly except for some inappropriate questions that were directed to Natasha. The second they went backstage again and she saw you, she knew you were angry at the people who asked inappropriate and sexist questions. She put her hand on your arm, telling you everything was alright but it still didn't sit okay with you. It was 2023 and people still were asking questions when they just should mind their own goddamn business. Why would literally anyone want to know what she Black Widow is wearing underneath her suit? Anyone with an IQ can greatly assume it's underwear and even it she were naked underneath, in what world was that your business?? "I hate it too Y/N. But look on the bright side, that one guy who were beyond the line got an ass-whopping from a tons of fans in the audience. Not only that but Steve answered the question as if it was his."

"I really liked his answer. 'Would anybody really want to flash themself to the enemy if there's a malfunction with the suit or it gets torn in a battle?'" You mimicked him and his reply. "It was such a huge statement that shut that boy up real quick. In my opinion, he deserves more than just Steve shutting him up but I can't do anything about it, can it?"

Natasha shock her head. "No you can't but I appreciate what he did and what you'd do anyways." With a smile you lead her further into the backstage area and waited for the staff to get you to the next scheduled event.

Later when Natasha was hours into writing autographs, you noticed her hand and wrist movement being awfully off. You asked a staff member to bring an ice pack if not available then a cold wet towel. Instead of the staff guy you talked to, Natasha's manager, who was only there for these kinda public events, came with the ice pack you had requested. "How long do you think she can still last?" He asked you as he whisper talked to you. "An hour or two but no longer. If you ask me I'd arrange the queue in a way that all children with their supervisors should cut to the front, maybe even all teenage girls."

You glance at Natasha who brightly smiled at some girl who seemed to be in their twenties. "She'll work through the pain till the end of line of I know for sure that we have to cut it way before that so I'd really consider that at least these kids get a chance to get their superhero before we have to shut it down." He nodded then told you he'd discuss it with the organizers.

By the time he went away your attention was back to the red headed superhero next to you. "Gimme your wrist." She was stubborn and did not give you her wrist, acting as if everything was perfectly fine. You were patient enough though and waited a few minutes until the teenager who was talking to Natasha was gone. Next in line was a a mother with a girl that couldn't have been older than 5 years old. You smiled at them and politely told them to wait a second. "You either give me your wrist now or we have to cut short way sooner than you want to." You told the Widow sternly. She sighed but gave you her left wrist anyways. You gently put the gel ice pack, which was in a towel, onto her wrist to cool down the swelling that was caused by signing autographs all day long. While you held the pack in place, the small girl put down a cute stuffed teddy bear onto the table while sweetly telling Natasha that it's for her. You were about to take it and put it aside as you did with all her other gifts too when she beat you to it and let it rest against the front of her body. "The bear stays." You respected her request without saying anything, she talked with the kid for a bit before asking for her name to sign the poster that they brought with them. You let go of her wrist, she signed the poster with the girls name and thanked them for coming.

This time she took the ice pack from you herself and laid it on the table so that she could rest her arm on the table better and more comfortable. At some point Dave, her manager came back with convention staff and rearrange the queue exactly the you proposed to him. An hour later you saw it in her eyes that she couldn't do much more. You hauled down Dave and he cut the line after an elderly woman who waited in line for what seemed like hours. "What a lovely team you have! They were very nice to let me still meet you." The old lady started to ramble. "I'm not sure if you recognize me but you saved me and my husband at the alien attack in 2012! Oh sweet girl I have to thank you so much for that. The shock was deep afterwards and we had to see a specialist and they found something in my husbands organs and it literally saved him again. After his surgery and recovery we started traveling more and saw so many beautiful places before." She then gifted Natasha some crystals that they had found on their trips around the world. "Ohh I probably should hurry. Your people are waiting."

Natasha and you both answered her at the same time. You said that there was no rush and the superhero told her that she should take all the time she needs. The elderly had such a relieved look on her face that it made your heart warm. She introduced herself as Martha and she started telling you both, she included you by constantly looking at you and back to Natasha, how the Black Widow still became her idol at such an old age and how inspiring everything was with what the red head did. Before Natasha even came to signing the free autograph card, she asked Martha if she wanted to take a photo with her. The woman was bubbling over with joy. Especially when Natasha told her she'd sign another autograph card for her husband for free. And since some fans never went away and just stayed to ogle at the woman, some angry words were spewed out of jealousy. You gave each of those people a death glare that shut them up for good but you insisted for Martha to come with Natasha and your security. Fans were chaotic and it wouldn't surprise you if some people would get violent with her just to get her autographs and spread hate. Your goal was to protect both woman even if your job contained only to protect the superhero at all costs. After leaving the Black Widow backstage you brought Martha to her car and waited until she drove off. With the assurance that she left safely, you went back to get Natasha and the both of you got into the van that was designated for her to get driven back to the Hotel.

As soon as you arrived in your room you immediately jumped into the shower to clear your mind since all of your thoughts were consumed by how sweet Natasha was with the fans. By the time you were done, your stomach was a rumbling mess, looking through the menu you ordered yourself some fries and a burger thanks to room service. You changed quickly into a tshirt and some shorts, then looking at all your notifications of your personal phone that was hidden in the hotel room safe. A tons of it were from twitter, people tagging you in videos and photos, gushing and freaking out over how cute you & Natasha were together. There was a particular tweet with two photos attached that made your stomach flip. The first one was you looking grumpily at fans but Natasha was looking at you lovingly, the second was the exactly opposite. You were looking at her, what fans described as heart eyes, as she was smiling at a younger fan. You send the tweet to Natasha through iMessage with a simple 'lol' as caption.

Meanwhile, Natasha was sitting at the hotel bar with a drink in one hand and her phone in her hand. She also was looking through tweets that fans added her in. When you sent her that tweet she was staring at the same photo already. She felt butterflies in her belly when she saw the way you looked at her, so soft and protective. But that feeling vanished into a clump of anxiety when she read your message. The simple 'lol' to that tweet of you guys gazing at each other when the one of you wasn't looking was a punch to her gut. She quickly typed a reply in hope it would be a good answer.

Fans ship me with anyone who's 3 feet near me. Sorry you have to experience that.

I don't mind. I feel flattered that so many people actually think I have "insane chemistry" with THE Black Widow.

I'm still sorry about it all. It can get pretty intense with some fans. They ship people so much to a point that they'll get delusional of every single interaction.

Ahh so I shouldn't be surprised if at some point I see a tweet of someone being super convinced that we're married?

If that happens I'll definitely gonna fuck with them and post "hints" of my non existing relationship with you.

Maybe I should join in with your little jokes?

I'd love that. Wanna start already? I'll come over to your room after I finish my food?

I'm at the bar.

Ohh even better. I'll be down in 10. Don't have too much fun without your "girlfriend" 😉

Before she knew it a new notification from twitter popped up. It was you tagging her in a tweet.

After a long convention day w/ @BlackWidow I finally get some alone time with my date.

Her heart started to beat faster than it did before. She had to re-read it a bunch of times before it true sunk it that you meant her as the date. And then, suddenly out of nowhere you stood beside her ordering yourself a bottle of beer. "I'm wondering how you felt about today. Well rather about how you feel about this texan comic con compared to the other 3 we've been to."

She sighed not wanting to think much about today since it all was overwhelming and exhausting but she couldn't deny you this answer since she knew you wanted to know this for future events. You wanted to make sure that she was alright and comfortable after a day like today. "The mob in the morning was awful but the autograph session and panel was fine. You hummed while taking a sip from your bottle, still watching here face to see if there was any discomfort or hatred towards the convention but all you saw was the hidden exhaustion. She was masking once again and you hated seeing her like this, though you knew why she did it that moment, you both were still in a public space and both of you were always careful incase paparazzi's were around. "So you'd be up for another convention?" She nodded but also told you that it wouldn't happen anytime soon. The superhero needed time to process this huge overwhelming and exhausting event first. And that wasn't an easy task. When you suggested to move this little drinking party that the two of you had into your room, she was quick to agree with your idea. The more privacy the better.

While you guys had been in the elevator, one of the two of you started to giggle and then the other one joined in and now nobody could actually stop. The giggling died down as you walked out the elevator and immediately stopped when you went around the corner. Your ex girlfriend was coming your way and you did not want her to recognize you. So you turned back around to Natasha, who also stopped laughing, now with a worried look on her face. Before she could even ask what was wrong you asked her to kiss you. She shocked out a shocked what. "Just kiss me please. I'll explain later." The urgency in your voice was something that Natasha didn't miss so she stopped thinking and dived in. And what a kiss it was. You never thought kissing the superhero would get you so deeply lost and leaving you with wanting more.

Since you were so engrossed in the kiss, you almost didn't hear your ex scolding you both. "These kids from today.." You tried your best not to burst out into laughter right then when you still had your lips locked with the red head. As soon as she disappeared in the elevator, Natasha broke the kiss. "Kids from today? Apparently I'm not in my thirties yet. That's good." She said then looked back into your eyes. "So why the need for a kiss Y/N?"

You gulped hard while feeling heat creeping up on you since you now felt a little embarrassed to tell her the truth. "That was my ex." Even though you both saw her disappearing, Natasha took a double look to where ex just had been. She couldn't fathom you dating someone so much older. "You dated her? That clearly very old lady??"

"That was around ten years ago, alright? She was happily throwing more money at me than she was already paying me for and I loved the money." You told her truthfully. It was no surprise for you that she was shocked about it. "You worked for her and then became a couple?" You nodded shyly at her question.

"Don't judge okay? I was young and dumb." You were feeling the awkwardness, that was a first between you two, there was hardly ever a awkward moment between you. Not only the awkwardness but also the silence was killing you slowly.

Natasha on the other hand was thinking hard, if you mixed business with pleasure once already, would you do it again? Were you willing to kiss her? With the way you looked at her you had to, right? If the fans were seeing something between you two then there had to be some bit truth to it. But what if she overstepped and all of this was unconsensual? She'd hate of she was treating you the way other people treated her. Thanks to her overthinking she didn't notice her inching closer to you until she felt your breath on her face. That snapped her out of the deepest thoughts she was in. The world suddenly seemed to stop for the both of you. The kiss from earlier played in your heads like a broken record but before anything could go further Natasha distanced her from you. "I think I'm a bit more tipsy than I thought I were." She apologized and looked away.

"And I think I'm drunk since I want you to kiss me again." You sighed. That piped her interest. "Well we do have great chemistry." You smiled at her and nodded. "I won't deny that. But I'm afraid to cross that line again."

"We won't cross that line if it's just one night right?" You agreed to that then pulled her into a desperate kiss. Her hands went straight to your waist, pulling you even closer. You didn't know who starting dragging the other person into your hotel room, all you knew for certain was that the night was full of passion and satisfying all your needs.

What you both didn't realize in your tipsy-drunk state was that you in fact crossed that line by sleeping with each other. Even fans noticed that something had changed with you and Natasha.

#natasha romanoff #black widow #natasha romanoff x reader #black widow x reader #natasha romanoff x female reader #black widow x female reader #natasha romanoff x fem!reader #black widow x fem!reader

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vendetta-if · 1 year ago

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I’m a sucker for (consensual!!!) fake-out-make-out scenarios—especially pre-relationship with a lot of unanswered emotions, sighs, pining (angst?) fjwkjfkww.

Ofc MC & each RO are more than capable of handling a situation, but I’d like to imagine that in some cases of laying low, you gotta do what u gotta do 😳

I was wondering if you already had this ask answered? 🫣 Otherwise, how would each RO react to MC initiating this trope?

I imagine at this stage of crushing/yearning, everyone would hold back in fear but ultimately give in (indulge) a little “for the sake of it looking real”. Who would try to play it cool afterwards? Who would fold after finally being able to kiss MC?

*can be as long or spicy as you want! I can’t stop playing the demo. you have a way with words ❤️

Ah, one of the downside of giving MC and some of the ROs such powerful abilities is that I won’t be able to include a fake-out-make-out scene without it feeling forced 😔✊ I suppose the closest one is the kabedon scene with Ash in Chapter 3 🤭

Ash

You don’t understand why MC is dragging you away; you’re pretty sure you could take on the group of goons by yourself. But whatever MC plans, you believe in them fully, as always.

Shouldering past the people milling around, MC takes you into a pretty secluded nook and before you can ask what’s the plan, MC pulls you in close and… kiss you.

You immediately freeze and you fear that if you move, whatever spell that the two of you are in right now would break and this little piece of heaven you’ve got going right now will be taken away from you.

You close your eyes and let MC takes the lead, sighing softly into the deepening kiss. You’ve dreamt of this countless of times but somehow, MC manages to make this real one feels a hundred times better than the ones in your dreams.

After what feels like an eternity, MC pulls away and you’re yanked back to earth. You expect regret or disgust on their face, but they’re looking at you with half-lidded eyes that just sends heat down to your groin.

Are you probably in a dream right now? And you’ll about to wake up in your bed soon? You decide to pinch your arm and… you’re still here. This really just happened.

MC says something about pursuers, but it’s a bit drowned by the sound of your thundering heartbeat reverberating in your ears. You’re still dumbfounded and just nods as you let MC drags you somewhere else.

Your mind is still reeling and you’ve got the feeling that you’ll be spending the next month or so replaying the scene over and over again in your head as you try to process the fact that you just had your first kiss with MC.

Rin

Getting pursued by a bunch of goons is not something you’ve got planned for today, but it is an expected outcome of agreeing to help MC. It doesn’t take a genius to conclude that taking a fight where you’re outnumbered is not a good idea, so you just happily let MC drags you into a more crowded area, possibly to make it easier for the two of you to lose your tails.

MC pulls you into a more secluded nook and in that instant, you know what they are planning to do. So, it doesn’t come as a surprise to you when MC leans down and press their lips against yours.

You’ve seen scenes like this in movies and books, but never have you thought that this would happen to you in real life, much less that this is how your first kiss is going to be. But you’re not really complaining though, especially when it’s with MC, the only person you’re interested in for quite some time now.

Bringing your arms up, you encircle them around MC’s neck, pulling them even closer as you decide to take control and deepen the kiss. After all, the only thing you can do is to make the most of your first kiss now, right?

MC inhales sharply in surprise but soon melts into the kiss and lets you take the rein as they grab your waist. Ah, this does taste as sweet as you’ve pictured in your head.

After minutes that felt like forever, you break the kiss first, stepping back and getting out of MC’s hold as you straighten your clothes. You almost let out a laugh when you see MC still standing frozen in place with wide eyes and flushed cheeks.

“Alright, I think we’ve lost them,” you say, taking hold of their hand. “Let’s get out of here, yes?”

MC finally shakes out of their daze, although not completely it seems. “Uh, yeah… Let’s…” they answer breathlessly as they let you drag them away.

“Next time, if you want to kiss me, just ask,” you tease with a smirk. “No need to wait for us getting chased.”

Santana

It was supposed to be a simple stakeout mission with MC, but a little misstep leads you to where you are now with the two of you running away from a group of goons. You can hear the sounds of their thunderous footsteps behind you, but you’re not going to risk turning around to see how far behind they are.

Your heart lightens as you and MC gets into a more crowded area. MC takes your hand in theirs and you happily let them lead you to the side, into a secluded nook. You’re not sure what MC’s plan is since this position is not really well-hidden, but you’ll take the chance to catch your breath a bit.

But before you can properly do it, MC suddenly leans in and press their lips against yours, catching you by surprise. Despite your budding feelings for MC, you still feel hesitation and decide to just let MC take the lead.

Deep down, you know MC is probably doing this only to blend in and lose your pursuers, but one can dream. Closing your eyes, you let yourself get lost in the feeling. It feels like there’s only you and MC as your surrounding melts away.

MC deepen the kiss and your soft gasp gets devoured. You feel their arms on your back and you reciprocate the gesture by circling your own around their hips, bringing them closer.

You’re not even sure how much time has passed until MC finally pulls away first, breaking the kiss. For a moment, the two of you can only stare at each other with wide eyes and flushed cheeks, breaths mingling with each other. Your heart is still racing hard in your chest—no longer from the adrenaline of getting pursued, but from the high of the kiss.

There’s so many things you want to say, but instead, the only thing that comes out of your mouth is, “Are they gone?”

Why? Because you’re stupid and a coward.

MC blinks and seems to snap out of the daze as they glance behind you. “Yeah, I think we’re in the clear,” they say as they step back, retracting their hands and getting out of your hold.

You feel your heart fall a bit at the lost of the contact. But then, MC takes your hand in theirs. “Let’s get out of here,” they whisper and you nod, once again letting them take you somewhere else.

Skylar

Honestly, you could have probably taken on the group of goons singlehandedly, especially with MC’s help. But it seems MC is not really looking for a confrontation right now because they decide to run away instead, dragging you with them to a more crowded area.

Either way, you don’t really mind, especially once they take you to a pretty secluded nook that’s too small to fit the two of you together. There are only mere couple of inches separating the two of you and how you want to just close the gap altogether.

And it seems like your prayer has been answered because MC is the one who leans forward and suddenly presses their lips to yours. Not letting the good fortune go to waste, you instinctively wrap your arms around their back.

You bring them even closer until your chest and theirs are flush against each other as you deepen the kiss. MC inhales in surprise before slowly melting in your arms.

You’ve kissed quite a number of people before, but somehow, this first one with MC just has something… special in it that you can’t really describe. It gives you the same feeling whenever you fly, a feeling of walking on fluffy clouds.

You swear, if those goons come and interrupt you out of this state of bliss… But thankfully, they don’t and after a while, MC breaks away breathlessly, cheeks adorably flushed.

You grin lopsidedly, still cradling them in your embrace. “Remind me, what were we doing again before this?”

MC looks at you flabbergasted. “W—We were getting chased—”

“Oh, yeah,” you sigh exaggeratedly. “How about we get out of here, hm?”

“Yeah, that’s what I’ve been waiting for,” they mumble.

They try to get out of your embrace but you tighten your hold instead and before they can complain, you take off with them in your arms.

#asks #anon ask #ro reactions #full cast ros #drabble #ro: ash #ro: rin #ro: santana #ro: skylar #if: vendetta #if vendetta #vendetta if #if game #if wip #dashingdon #choicescript

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bloatedandalone04 · 1 year ago

Text

Wrapped Around Your Finger - Part 0.4

Series Masterlist | Original Fic

➪in which the tour begins and though anakin is excited to be back on stage, he already misses having you there with him, and this results in him spending his last night with you by loving on you in every possible way.

PSA: strongly suggested to read the warnings before proceeding.

WC; 8.7k | Do not repost this anywhere, reblogs are fine ♡

“I think we’ve narrowed it down to three options,” Vinny tells Helena and sits next to her, his phone in his hand as he scrolls through the Instagram pages of each potential photographer. “How’d we do?”

Helena hummed as she scrolled through the pictures. “See? That wasn’t so hard, was it?” She teased as she paused on one of the pages. “What about this girl?”

Anakin leaned over and saw that she had the Instagram account named elizaphotography open. “She’s my first choice,” he announced before going back to writing down lyrics to a song that’s been stuck in his head all day. “I don’t know about the other guys.”

“Yeah, I liked her, as well,” Theo agrees.

“Me too,” Helena says and hands Vinny back his phone. “So if she wasn’t your first choice, you’re outnumbered, Vin.”

Vinny scoffs as he shoves his phone into his pocket. “I chose her, too,”

“Perfect, it’s settled,” Helena claps as she stands up. “I’ll arrange an agreement with her and get her signed onto the tour, which is two days away, if you weren’t aware.”

Anakin felt his heart skip a beat at that.

Two more days with you at home, then another day stuck on the bus.

He really wanted you with him the whole time, but he also wasn’t about to go back on his words and ask you to give up a great career opportunity just so you can watch him from backstage. “We’re aware, thanks,” he mumbled and felt the eyes of all three of them stare at him, but he just continued writing lyrics that were quickly beginning to sound like a straight up love letter addressed to you.

“Alright,” Helena says and Anakin misses the weary look she shares with the guys before backing away. “Just making sure. Get some good sleep these next couple of nights, guys. You’ve got a busy three months ahead of you.”

She leaves after that, and Anakin quickly begins to feel a bit bad, but he liked to think his harsh words were justified. “Hey, man,” Vinny says and places his hand on Anakin’s shoulder. “You okay?”

He nods, closing the book and standing up, giving his two friends an apologetic smile. “Yeah, I’m good,” he answers. “I think I’ll go home early today, if you guys don’t mind. I still need to pack a few things, and I’ll probably forget to do it later on.”

That sounded reasonable, right?

“Sure, man,” Theo says and stands up as well. “You go home, Vin and I will catch up with you in a bit.”

Vinny nods and gives him an over-exaggerated smile, successfully making Anakin laugh as he walks towards the door that Helena left through not even a minute earlier. “Thanks, guys,” he says, grateful that they seemed to understand him better than he thought they would. As he heads towards the exit, he takes his phone out of his pocket and dials your number, bringing the phone up to his ear as he waits for you to pick up.

“Hi, Ani,” your way too kind voice greets him, and he felt better already.

“Hi, princess,”

“What are you guys up to?” He could hear you rummaging around with something in the background, and he really wanted to be home with you right now. “Making more hit songs? Preferably about me?”

Your soft laugh met his ear and he refrained from groaning. “All our songs are about you,” he reminds you as he leaves the building the studio is in. “Perks of being the lead songwriter.”

You laugh again and he could picture your pretty smile without even trying to.

“But, no,” he answered. “I’m on my way home.”

“Oh,” you sounded surprised but also a bit happy at the news. “Early day today?”

“No, I just miss you,” and then he was once again picturing your small smile he knew was just for him.

“Are you sure you have everything?” You ask Anakin for the third time as he stuffs his headphones into his bag.

“Yes,” he answers for the third time and turns to face you. “Do you have everything? Still have that email saved that proves you’re a student there and get to take advantage of the student housing on campus?”

“Yes,” you say and kiss his cheek. “Bye, bedroom. See you in three months.”

You wave goodbye to yours and his room before heading towards the door, and he is convinced there is no one in the world who is cuter than you.

After locking the door, Anakin takes your hand in his as the two of you make your way towards the elevators. The whole ride down, as well as the short walk to the side of the apartment building, he didn’t loosen his grip on you for a second.

You weren’t complaining one bit, nor could you blame him for wanting to touch you as much as possible right now. You weren’t doing much better.

After getting a drive to the airport you meet up with both the guys, who had arrived a bit earlier.

“Hey, Y/n,” Theo smiled at you when you and Anakin approached the bag check area. They both already had their bags checked, so they were just waiting on the two of you. “Nice to see you.”

You smile at him as Vinny looks up from his place on the uncomfortable airport chair. “I can’t believe I’m going to say this, especially after the torture you two put us through on the bus last time, but I’m glad you’re here,” he says and you laugh quietly. “This guy has been acting like a depressed teenage boy ever since you got accepted into that program. Been a real downer.” He points at Anakin with a smirk.

Laughing again, you press yourself against your boyfriend’s side as he glares at his friend. “Shut up, Vin,”

“Be nice,” you lightly slap his chest as he pulls you closer to him. “In all honesty, I haven’t been acting any better.”

Vinny nods. “Fair,” was all he said before he looked back down at his phone.

You lean up and kiss Anakin’s cheek, moving to pull away from him when he tugs you back against his side and kisses you properly. Stepping away with a laugh, you hold out your bag to him with a soft pout. “Get this checked for me?”

He takes it from you without question and kisses the side of your head before walking towards the screening section, leaving you to stand with Theo.

“Hey, I’m not sure how much you wanted me to know, if at all, but Anakin told me about your mom,” you start and move closer to him. Theo tenses up at that and leans against the wall. “I’m really sorry to hear that she’s sick. How are you doing?”

He sighs and shrugs. “I don’t care that he told you, don’t worry,” he said. “I figured he would, so it’s fine. I’m fine, too.”

You nod, pursing your lips as you think about what to say next. It was clear that he wasn’t, but you weren’t about to call him out on it. That was Vinny’s thing. “Okay,” you murmur, reaching over and squeezing his shoulder. “If there is anything at all I can do, just let me know.”

Theo gives you a semi-forced smile as he nudges your side with his elbow. “Thanks, Y/n/n,” he mutters. “I’m good for now. Promise.”

“Okay,” you repeat and smile teasingly at him. “Are you ready for round two of tour life?”

He smiles, too, and gives you a hesitant nod. “As ready as I’ll ever be,” he answered.

“You’ll be great,” you assure him as Anakin walks back over to you. “You’ll all be great.”

“You’re sweet,” Vinny says as he stands up. “Far too nice for our boy Anakin here.”

Anakin gives him a blank look and you have to hold back a laugh. “Where’s your girlfriend, Vinny?” He asked as he laced his fingers with yours. “We’re going to be late.”

Vinny rolls his eyes and looks behind you. “Right there,” he replied as Clara rushed over to you after getting her bag checked. “Hey, babe.”

“Hi!” She says back, out of breath as she smiles at you. “I’m so sorry I took so long getting here. I had to order an Uber and the traffic was crazy.”

“You’re fine,” Anakin says as you all begin to walk towards the loading bridge.

After giving the lady your tickets you were left to board the plane and sit for the next eleven hours. The whole ride there Anakin somehow managed to sleep peacefully with his head on your shoulder while you watched the entirety of the Scream franchise.

You ended up sleeping through most of the third one, but other than that, you didn’t get nearly as much sleep as Anakin did. He was a bit groggy because of it as the five of you made your way through the London airport. Helena was waiting for you when you made it outside, and the sight of the tour bus brought back so many memories from the last tour, it had your hand tightening around Anakin’s as he guided you towards it.

“Alright, guys,” Helena said excitedly as you all got onto the bus. “And girls. Are you ready for your show tomorrow night?”

Theo tossed his bag onto the top bunk before sitting on the small couch that was next to the even smaller table. “So ready,” he answered with a certain amount of enthusiasm that gave away the fact that he was playing it up a bit. He was excited, sure, but he would rather be at home and helping his sister take care of his mom, but he knew what he was getting into when he joined this industry.

It truly didn’t wait for anyone.

“I was waiting for the day we got to go on tour again,” Vinny says as he heads towards the back of the bus and throws his bag onto the double bed. “Just didn’t realize it would come this quick.”

Helena nods as she sits down at the table. “This is all very fast-paced, I know,” she agreed. “How ‘bout you, Anakin? Are you ready?”

Anakin pulls you with him towards the bunk as he nods. “I’m ready,” he says and sets his bag down on the ground, turning to take yours from you and set it down as well. “I’m not ready to say goodbye to this one, though.”

You laugh as he pulls you against his chest. “‘This one’?”

“Yeah,” he states. “This one.”

Shaking your head, you look down at the bottom bunk. “We’re both supposed to fit in that bed?” You ask and he nods, looking over at the small bed as well. “Not sure how that’s going to work. Unless I sleep completely on top of you.”

Anakin smirks and slides his hands lower down your back, seeming to not care at all about the four other people around. Five if you counted the driver. “That’s the plan, baby,”

You roll your eyes and push him away from you. “You’re such a guy,”

He laughs loudly as he moves to lay down on the bottom bunk, his hand finding yours as he tugs you down as well. “C’mere,” he mumbles. “Let’s see if we fit.”

You huff as you move to lay on top of him, his hands finding their home on your hips almost instantly. “Wow, would you look at that,” you mutter as you settle against him. “We fit.”

Anakin hums, kissing your lips quickly. “It’s you and me,” he points out. “Of course we fit.”

You smile and kiss him again before moving to rest your head on his shoulder.

“Does this remind you of anything?” He asks as he runs his hands up and down your back.

“Us,” you answer. “Circa…..less than six months ago?”

“Feels like it was yesterday,” he grins. “It also reminds me of when you and I fell asleep on the upstairs couch at my parents house after we threw that graduation party.”

“Oh, my God,” you whine, burying your face against his neck. “Your mom was so mad about that. She came home and the house was a mess.”

“Hey, she said she wouldn’t be back for another three days. I would’ve had plenty of time to clean it up had she stuck to her word,”

“We would’ve,” you pointed out, brushing your nose along his jawline. “I love you, Ani, but we both know you’re awful at cleaning.”

“True,” he agreed. “But that didn’t stop my mom from sending you home and making me clean the entire house by myself while I nursed a hangover.”

You laugh and move to lay half on top of him and half on the small amount of space left on the bed. “It feels like it’s been years since we were in high school,” you admit quietly as Theo and Helena fell into a hushed conversation. You weren’t sure you wanted to know what Vinny and Clara were up to.

Anakin hummed and you felt the vibrations of it against the side of your face. “It has been years,” he mumbled, his voice giving away the fact that he was tired, despite sleeping for most of the flight. “It’s been almost three since we graduated.”

“I know, but it feels like it’s been way longer than that,” you murmur, tracing the tip of your index finger along the various shapes on his shirt. “Maybe it’s just me. I feel like I haven’t slowed down in so long. It’s been one thing after the other since we finished high school.”

He hums again, turning on his side and draping his arm over your waist. “I know,” he says quietly. “I’m to blame for most of it, I know that. I’m sorry it’s been crazy ever since the guys and I released that first song.”

You shake your head and press your body against his. “I wouldn’t change a thing, Ani,” you promise, stroking his cheekbone with your thumb. “I’m just hoping we get some time to ourselves after this. Is that selfish to want? Considering we’ve been spending almost all of our time together since we were seventeen?”

He shakes his head this time and pulls you closer to him. “No,” he states. “It’s not selfish, baby, because I want it, too.”

You smile up at him, wondering how he was able to assure you so easily with the simplest of words. “Yeah?”

“Yeah,” he presses a kiss to your forehead. “I want to spend days on end with you in our apartment, in our bed, and not have to worry about anything else all day long.”

You groan and the sound goes straight to his dick, but he did his best to push away the dirty thoughts about you in his head. While you and he weren’t very quiet last time on tour, you also had a whole part of the bus to yourselves, and fucking you on the bottom bunk while Theo slept above him was a bit much, even for him.

“Sounds perfect,” you practically moan and Anakin really had to put in the effort to stop the blood from rushing to the lower part of his body.

“You should try to sleep,” he changed the subject in an attempt to stop himself from thinking about all the ways he could take you right now. “I know you barely slept on the plane.”

You huff out a laugh, settling against him. “You did enough of that for the both of us, don’t you think?”

He smirked. “That’s the best sleep I’ve gotten while not in an actual bed,” he argued but you just shook your head. “It’s late, pretty girl, and we’ve got a long day tomorrow. You should try to get some sleep.”

“I’ll sleep in a bit,” you say and rest your head on his chest. “Right now I just want to lay with you.”

And Anakin would never complain about laying with you for as long as you wanted, because it was something he wanted, too.

So, he stayed in the bunk with you for a couple of hours before you both changed into more comfortable clothing, and then you were right back in the bed together.

“I don’t know how I’m supposed to sleep in this bed by myself once you’re gone,” he confessed quietly, not wanting to wake up his sleeping bandmates. “Now that I know we fit perfectly together on it, it’ll be hard to get used to not having you in my arms.”

“Easy,” you warned just as quietly. “If you keep talking like that, I’ll end up staying with you instead of doing this program.”

“Maybe that’s my plan,” he joked, but he quickly realized how serious his words actually are. You didn’t need to know that, though. “I’m proud of you, you know that?”

You nod, kissing his neck and closing your eyes. “I know. And I’m proud of you, too. And I love you,”

His lips found yours in the dark bus, and he kissed you more than a few times before pulling your body right up against his. “I love you,” he swore, wrapping his arms securely around you and feeling the way you relaxed completely against him as you fell asleep.

“Hi,” an unfamiliar voice said from behind Anakin. He turned around and looked up from his crouched position as he tuned the string of his guitar, his eyes meeting ones of a girl he’s never seen before.

There were a few hours left before he was set to go out on stage, and he was currently going over the standard soundchecks backstage.

“Hi,” he trailed off, trying to think of where he could’ve seen this girl, because it was clear that she was here for a reason, and it seemed like she knew him.

“Oh, right, sorry,” she laughed, lifting her hand revealing an expensive looking camera. “I guess since there aren’t any photos of me on my Instagram, you wouldn’t have recognized me from anywhere. I’m Liz, your band’s new photographer.”

She held her hand out to him and Anakin straightened up a bit but stayed in his knelt position. “Oh, hey,” he greets in a much more friendly tone. He shook her hand briefly before going back to working on his guitar. “Yeah, I had no idea what you looked like, just what your Instagram shows. Your pictures are good.”

Liz’s face tints pink a bit as she holds up her camera. “Thank you,” she smiles. “I can’t wait to start taking some for you and your band.”

Anakin laughs as he glances up at her. “I wouldn��t call it my band,” he brushes off her words. “We’re a team.”

“You’re the lead singer and lead songwriter, right?” She smirks as she plays with the settings on the camera. When Anakin hesitantly nods, her smirk grows. “So it’s your band.”

“Not really,” he tries again but shuts up when she brings the camera up to her face.

“Mind if I get some behind the scenes pictures of you?”

Anakin looks down at his ripped tee and worn jeans with a frown. “I look kinda bad right now,”

Liz scoffs. “You look hot,” she grins when he looks up at her. “You’re in your element. The fans will go crazy for it. They want to see you in a natural setting, one where you’re not trying to look good but somehow managed to anyway.”

“Right,” he laughed. “If you say so.”

“You know I’m right. Now smile,” he did as he was told and waited until Liz had taken at least ten photos of him before turning away and focusing on the strings of his guitar. “Thanks. I’ll see you later...in action.”

When he heard her begin to walk away, Anakin lifted his gaze again and watched as she wandered off towards the exit. There was something about her that he couldn’t quite place his finger on, but it was weird. He knew that much.

But he also didn’t want to judge her after one interaction with her.

Shaking his head, he goes back to tuning the strings and takes another ten or so minutes doing that before setting it aside and pulling out his phone. When he opened his Instagram app, he was met with the picture Liz had just taken of him not too long ago.

It was already edited to make it look a bit more HD and vibrant, and he wondered how she had managed to do that and post it so quickly. It was captioned ‘One of many to come. Here’s a sneak peak of Anakin before tonight’s show in Manchester! I’m beyond excited to go on this journey with you.’, and she had tagged both his account and the band’s.

It already had over fifteen thousand likes, and after scrolling through her other posts, he realized that the simple picture of him was her most popular upload already. He couldn’t lie, she was quite talented, and if her posting him was what got her stuff out there, he was more than okay with that.

Still looking at his phone, he missed the way the door to the parking lot opened and how you quickly made your way over to him. “Ani,” you call and he looks up instantly, rising to stand just as you throw yourself into his arms.

You kissed him before he could say anything, and he was helpless in fighting off the smile that took over his lips. “Baby,”

You grin at him. “I saw that picture your photographer posted,” you tell him and Anakin could immediately hear the way your voice changed into one he’s heard you speak in way too many times to count. “You looked so hot, I had to come see you for myself.”

He laughed, holding your waist with both hands. “She’s quick with it, huh? I guess we made the right choice,”

You nod and kiss him again. “So you’ve met her? Officially?” You ask and he nods, running his hands up and down your sides. “Damn, I wanted to meet her before tonight, too.”

“I’m sure you’ll be able to talk to her before the show,” he offered as he leaned down and kissed your neck. “You look so pretty.”

You scoff and glance down at the simple white dress you wore, the contrast to his fully black outfit and how different your styles were more evident than ever. “Please,” you laugh. “I don’t even have my makeup done. I was in the middle of it when I saw the post and had to run across the parking lot to come see you.”

“Ah,” he hums, pulling back with a smirk. “So that’s why you’re all hot and bothered.”

“Nope,” you shake your head, glancing around the backstage area before shamelessly gripping the front of his jeans. “You’re why I’m all hot and bothered.”

“Y/n,” he warned as he looked over to see a bunch of the stage crew members scurry around in an attempt to get things ready for the show. “Don’t make me take you right back to that tour bus when I’m supposed to be getting ready for the show.”

“Don’t threaten me with a good time,” you tease back, pulling your hand away. “I gotta finish getting ready, and so do you. I’ll see you in a bit.”

He nods, grabbing your hand when you begin to move away from him and pulling you back in for a deep kiss. “See you soon,”

And then you were on your way with a shy smile on your lips, and he was left with a semi hard-on as he helped get the stage set up. It wasn’t part of his job, and there were professionals there to do it for him, but he needed the distraction to help rid him of your effects on him.

Since you were now in London, Anakin had gone out of his way to book a hotel room for tonight so he can spend his last night with you alone and in an actual bed. Your dorm was about an hour away from tonight’s venue, so you came up with the plan to catch a ride the rest of the way tomorrow morning while Anakin left for the rest of the tour.

The fact that he had less than twenty four hours left with you did the trick and he was no longer sporting a semi.

Hours go by and it’s finally time for him to go back on stage for the first time since the last tour. Yeah, it was only a few months ago, but Anakin couldn’t deny how much he missed performing. And he couldn’t deny how much he loved seeing you in your personal spot backstage.

Before he joined the other guys on stage, he stopped next to you with his guitar strap around his body. He pulled you towards him and kissed you hard, grinning when you pulled back and murmured, “Have a good show, Ani,”

That was all he needed to hear as he made his way out on stage, and the loud cheers of the fans had both of you smiling.

You stand next to Clara as Vinny introduces the band from his place behind the drumkit, and she was as antsy as you were the first time you saw them on stage.

A flash goes off next to you and you turn, noticing a girl in her late twenties holding up a camera and taking pictures of the guys in various angles. “Hey,” you call out over the beginning chords of Dirty Little Secret. The girl looks over at you with an unreadable expression, making your smile drop a bit. “You’re Liz, right?”

“That’s right,” she yells back, stepping towards you with a small smirk. “And you are…?”

You furrow your brows, assuming she already knew who you were since she was told to look into the band she would be working with, and you weren’t exactly missing from Anakin’s Instagram. He only had two posts now, the one with you, and the shirtless picture of him from the SLACKERS shoot. He posted that one mainly for you, since you so sweetly asked him to.

“I’m Y/n,” you say and nod towards your boyfriend. “Anakin’s girlfriend.”

“Right,” she dragged the word out as she lifted the camera again. “I knew you looked familiar. Saw you on his Instagram. You guys are cute.”

The way she said that had you narrowing your eyes as she moved past you and towards the stairs that lead to the mosh pit. She didn’t give you the chance to respond, but she was also technically working, so you didn’t really get too annoyed.

You turn back towards the stage and heat up at the thin layer of sweat that had already settled on Anakin’s skin. His outfit was simple; black jeans, a vintage tee and black converse, but fuck did it get you going.

As he sang the song he wrote way back when the two of you first got together, you had to stop yourself from moaning out loud at how good your boyfriend looks. Realistically, no one would hear you if you were to slip up and moan, but you also didn’t want to take that chance. A bit hypocritical since you used to receive a lot of dirty looks back on campus after spending hours on end with Anakin in bed, but you couldn’t be blamed. Anakin was beyond attractive, and those walls were far too thin.

Even though you had pretty much the best view, you were still excited to see the HD pictures Liz took once the show was over. She seemed relatively nice and career focused, and you could only assume that the two of you would get along. Sure, you wouldn’t see much of her since this is your last day on the tour and this is her first, but the potential of a possible friendship forming between you was definitely there.

The show went on for nearly two hours before the guys were bidding their London fans a goodbye and leaving the stage, all three of them pumped up on adrenaline. Vinny is pretty much all over Clara, and Anakin is no better. After handing off his guitar, his hands find your hips and he pulls you against his sweat coated body.

You didn’t mind at all, and you were actually having a hard time resisting poking your tongue out and licking a line up his neck. “You guys were amazing,” was all you managed to get out before his lips were on yours. He pressed you against the recently unplugged speaker, his hands bunching up the fabric of your flimsy blue dress. “Ani.”

“I love that sound,” he muttered, kissing you again. “I love this color on you, too. This dress is so pretty, baby.”

You hold back a moan and tangle your hands in his hair. “Anakin,” you said breathlessly. “Let’s get out of here, please?”

He groaned, kissing along your exposed shoulder. “Let’s go find out how this dress looks on the hotel room floor,” he suggested, pulling away and taking your hand in his as he led you towards the exit.

The hotel was a short five minute drive away from the venue, so Anakin just flagged down a cab after grabbing your things and his bag. On the ride there, he sent a quick text to the guys and Helena that told them he would meet up with them the following morning at whatever place they decided to station the bus at for the night.

Then he was pulling you along with him as he took the room key from the lady at the front desk. He barely had the door labeled 306 shut fully before he was pressing you right up against it, his mouth covering yours and his hands gripping the backs of your thighs after you both dropped your bags. “Anakin,” you gasp quietly as he lifts you up. “Please.”

He hummed into the kiss, only breaking it to murmur, “We’re going to take our time tonight, princess,” he rasped, sliding his hands under your dress and gripping your ass. “I’m going to make you feel so good for hours.”

“Ani,” you whined against his mouth, holding onto his hair as he pulls you away from the door and moves towards the bed. You moan as his hands knead your soft skin before he sets you down on the floor just in front of the bed. “I need you.”

“I need you, too,” he says back, kissing along your shoulders and pushing down the straps of your dress. “I always need you. Remember that, princess.”

You nod as he slides your dress down your body and lets it fall to the floor. When his hands grip your thighs again, you jump up and wrap your legs around his waist and kiss him, clinging onto him as he lays you down on the bed.

It was nearing midnight, and even though you both have an early day ahead of you tomorrow, the fact that this was your last night together before being separated was hanging heavily at the front of your minds.

Anakin kissed all along your neck and shoulders as if he was trying to burn the feeling of you into his mind. He was savoring the feeling of your soft skin against his lips as if this was the last time he’d ever experience you, but he knew that was far from the truth.

You are undeniably and completely his, much like how he is yours.

“You’re so good to me, Ani,” you praise as he kisses down your body, his fingers gently kneading you through your bra. “I don’t deserve you.”

He shook his head as he pressed a kiss to your hip. “You’ve got it wrong, pretty girl,” he said, running his nose along your pretty pink and lacy panties. “I don’t deserve you. I’ve done nothing in my life that has ever made me deserve you.”

You pout. “You write songs about me,”

“Yeah, but that began happening after I met you. Before I was just a dumb band geek who could hardly keep up with the rest of them,”

Your mind goes back to the early days of yours and his relationship, back when you were part of the school’s book club and he was part of the school’s band. Realistically, the two of you should have never met because you were so different from one another, but you were beyond glad that you did.

You were sure there was no better person for you than Anakin Skywalker, and you didn’t want the chance to even try to prove yourself right.

“Look at you now,” you grin. “You’re living out your dream. And you were never dumb.”

Anakin laughed as he kissed your inner thigh. “Maybe not, but you were always a hell of a lot smarter than me,” he pointed out and traced the lining of your bra with his index finger. “And it’s only a dream because you’re right here with me.”

Your face heats up and you bite down hard on your lip, his words sending a jolt of need through your body.

His hands gently tug the lace down your legs and drop them to the floor, his mouth moving to wrap around your bundle of nerves. You grab his left hand and tangle your fingers together, bringing your joined hands up to your lips and pressing a kiss to the bumpy skin of his newest tattoo for you.

You place his hand on your chest and he gets the hint immediately, curling his fingers and stroking your nipple through the thin material of your bra as he licks a stripe up your folds.

“Anakin,” you whine, trying to close your legs but he was relentless as he pushed them back down. “I want you.”

He lifts his head, his mouth glistensing from both his spit and your juices. “I want you, too, pretty girl,” he promised, using his free hand to fuck his middle and index finger into you. “But we’re going slow tonight, the way we both need it.”

You whine again as his mouth returns to your clit, his tongue tracing the letters of his name onto it in time with the thrusts of his hand. Your hand tangles in his hair while your other one fumbles with the clasp of your bra. Once you pull it from your body, Anakin’s fingers go right back to pinching and pulling at your hardening peaks, the feeling of it only making the fucks of his hand that much more intense.

“Are you going to get me off with your mouth, Ani?” You ask so innocently, despite you literally asking if he was going to make you come with just his tongue and fingers.

He groaned against your core, the vibrations traveling right up your body and making you squirm a bit. “Yeah, princess,” he answered, slowly fucking his digits in and out of you. “I’m gonna get you off with my mouth.”

You moan loudly and arch your back a bit, placing your hand over his in a tight grip. “Fuck,”

He smirked and brought his tongue back to your folds, where he fucked you with it right alongside his fingers. “You want it?” He teased, unable to stop himself from getting you to say more and more filthy things that always sounded so sweet coming from you.

And, of course, you give in to him without any hesitation. “I want it,”

“Let me taste you, pretty girl,” he nearly begged and roughly thrusted his hand. “All over my tongue.”

He sunk the wet muscle into your core and thrusted it a few times. That was really all you needed as your stomach tightened and your back arched. “Ani, oh, God,” you cry out as the knot that had been quickly building up snaps and unravels.

Anakin greedily cleans up any evidence of your release, slowing down the sharp fucks of his fingers before pulling them out of you completely. He sits back on his knees as he sucks the digits into his mouth, all while keeping eye contact with you.

Your eyes are blown wide as you watch him pop his fingers out of his mouth before he moves onto ridding himself of his shirt. His bare chest next to his ink covered arm had your mind blanking for a second or two as you were hit with an overwhelming feeling of need for the man in front of you.

His hand slides up your leg and bends it at the knee, using very little strength to pry your thighs apart so he can stare at your sopping entrance. You writhe and bite down hard on your lip, and his smirk makes your heartbeat quicken. “Move back, princess,” he demands in a deep voice and you oblige right away.

You move back and lean against the ridiculous amount of pillows that were propped against the headboard. Your hands tug on his jeans as you whine quietly, your mind a lust-filled mess at this point. “Take them off,” you beg and he laughs.

He unzips the black material and kicks them off his legs. They join the growing pile on the floor as he hovers over you and grunts at the way you grab his hand and suck his thumb into your mouth. “You’re so hot,” he muttered as he settled between your legs.

“Don’t talk to me about who’s hot when you’re literally the most attractive man on the entire planet,” you say and pull him down on top of you.

Anakin laughs again and grinds his still clothed front against your bare one. “You always know just what to say to make me feel special, baby,”

You lean in and kiss him hard, tugging on his hair as you did so. “You are special,” you mumble and kiss along his jawline. “Don’t ever forget that.”

He hummed and moved his head down to suck another mark onto your shoulder, wanting all of the guys in your program to see that you were taken and that they shouldn’t even bother wasting their time. “I want you,” he rasped, kissing you again and noisily pulling away. “Are you ready for me?”

“Always,” you answer without hesitation.

He grins and kisses you again while you take it upon yourself to rid him of his boxer briefs. Your previous release made it easy for him to slide into your core, and the two of you share a moan as he pulls away from the kiss. “Fuck,” he groaned and pressed his head against the side of your neck.

You were still a bit sensitive, but you were also far too gone to wait any longer. Tangling your hands in his hair, you tug at the slightly long strands as he pulls out halfway before sinking back into you. “Ani,” you whimper as you wrap your legs around his waist.

“I know, baby,” he mumbles and peppers kisses along your neck and shoulders as he begins thrusting into you at a slow pace. He was painfully hard and his body was begging him to go fast, but he didn’t want this night with you to end anytime soon. “You feel so good.”

Like always.

Your sweet moans sound throughout the hotel room as he slowly and sharply fucked into you. Your walls took every inch of him greedily, and the tightness of them had Anakin grunting quietly under his breath.

Wrapping your arms tightly around his shoulders, you bring your mouth to his in a surprisingly delicate kiss, despite the current circumstances. Your lips mesh together as his hips meet yours at a slow pace, swapping out the quick fucks you’ve shared since moving into the new apartment together.

While it was always intimate and personal with Anakin, and it was amazing every single time, on the rare occasion he took his time and touched every single part of you….you never felt more loved, wanted and needed.

He breaks the kiss and moves his mouth to your neck, where he kisses every inch of you. You wrap your legs around his waist, your heels digging into his back to push him even deeper into you. He lifts one hand and pushes away the hair from your forehead that had gotten messy from your previous actions, his fingers running down the side of your face and resting on the curve of your jaw.

How he was so gentle in one way while absolutely destroying you in another was sending your mind into a frenzy.

He told you from day one that he would always take care of you, and that meant in and out of bed, and he was never one to break a promise, especially one he made to you.

He made you feel so good all the time, and right now was one of those times you truly felt connected to him.

“You feel so good, baby,” he praised quietly, and his sweet praises always made you a blushing mess for him.

Usually he loved to get you loud, which ultimately resulted in him fucking you hard and quick into the bed, but nothing turned him on like when he took you nice and slow.

The intense feeling of your walls hugging every inch of him had him going crazy. He had no idea how he was supposed to go weeks without you, and not even in this way. Five years is a long time with someone, and he had never gone more than a few days without you.

He was going to miss you more than he’s ever missed anything else, but the thought of finally settling down with you after this was over is what he is holding onto.

He didn’t care that you were both still so young. He wanted you forever, and he wanted everyone to know it.

As soon as the tour was over, he was going to ask you the question he’s been waiting to ask you since a month into your relationship.

“Ani,” you whimper, tugging on his hair as he brought you closer and closer to your release with the slow fucks of his hips. “I love you.”

Anakin lifts his head and kisses you deeply, his thrusts stuttering a bit as you clench down around him. He kisses you a couple more times, cradling the back of your head in one hand while his other finds yours, where he laces your fingers together.

He held you as if you were the most pure and fragile thing he had ever seen, and your already dizzy head swooned further. “I love you, princess,” he rasped, kissing you again as he fucked into you a bit harder but at the same pace. “My pretty girl. I love you so much.”

Though he was going slow, you felt your release quickly approaching. He was so sweet and your emotions were getting the better of you, and you moan against his mouth as you hug him close. “Anakin,” you practically whisper as you tug on his hair.

He hummed and kissed along your jaw, pausing by your ear so he could murmur, “Come for me, pretty girl,”

And you do.

You cling to him impossibly tight as you come for the second time with Anakin mumbling soft praises to you.

The warmth that flooded around him spurred his own release, and Anakin groans and curses under his breath as your walls suck him in deeper. “Good girl,” he says quietly as he moves to lay next to you. He pulls you into his arms and kisses all over your face as he tangles his legs with yours. “You always take me so well.”

You grin up at him. “Well, I was made for you,” you joke, but both of you believe that your words were true. It really did feel like you were made for each other.

Anakin laughed and kissed your forehead. “You’re not wrong,” he agreed and ran his fingers up and down your back as you both tried to get your breathing back to normal.

You lay together in a comfortable silence, your hand resting on his chest as you tried to forget about the fact that you really only had a few hours left with him. Propping yourself up on your elbow, you meet his eyes and match his grin. “We should probably get some sleep soon. We have an early morning,”

He nodded, gently grabbing your left hand. “We should,” he says as he kisses your tattoo of his initial. “But I’d rather be tired tomorrow than waste our time together by sleeping.”

Your smile grows as he pulls you closer to him. “What did you have in mind, then? If you don’t want to go to sleep?”

Anakin hummed in pretend thought as he grabbed the back of your thigh and placed it over his. “I remember saying that I would make you feel good for hours,” he recalled and your face heated up as your hand tangled in his hair again.

“I think I remember you saying something like that, too,”

“I’m going to miss you so much,” Anakin mumbles against your lips as he holds your body impossibly close to his.

“I miss you already,” you quietly confess as you pressed your head against his shoulder. “But it’s only three months. And I’ll come see you when it’s our anniversary. And your birthday is coming up, too, and I’m not missing that.”

He kissed the top of your head, the cool air blowing your hair around a bit. “You have no idea how happy it makes me to hear that,”

You smile up at him with tears in your eyes and he couldn’t stop himself from kissing you right now if he tried. His lips met yours in a gentle kiss, one that reminded him of the first ever one he shared with you, back when he was an inexperienced teen.

He didn’t want this moment to end, nor did he want to go back onto that bus without you, but it was nearing the time he was supposed to meet back up with the guys so they can make it to the next location in time.

Anakin pulled you closer just as his phone went off, and he knew who it was without even checking it. He pulled it out of his pocket and glanced at the text before looking back at you. “It’s Vinny,” he says quietly. “I’ve gotta go.”

You nod and take his hand in yours. “I love you,”

He kisses your forehead and squeezes your fingers in between his. “I love you so much, pretty girl,”

You sniff quietly and step away from him. “Have fun, Ani,” you request in a whisper. “And don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine.”

He would always worry about you for as long as he lived, and you knew that. He was actually very worried about you living in London on your own while he was off with two of his closest friends, but he didn’t want to make you any more nervous about it than you already are. “I know you will,” he smiled sadly. “I’m so proud of you. You’ll do amazing.”

Anakin grabbed his bag and moved towards the cab that had been waiting for him for the past ten minutes, and if Anakin hadn’t already told the guy that he’d tip him extra for waiting, he was sure he would’ve left by now.

“Keep me updated,” he nearly begged as he opened the backseat door. “I want to hear about everything, okay?”

You nod and wipe under your eyes. “I will,” you promised, dreading having to go back to your hotel room to get ready to move into your temporary dorm. “Text me after every show, please?”

“You know I will,” he grinned then softened his gaze as more tears fell from your eyes. “We can handle three months, princess. That’s nothing when I know it’s you who I’m coming back to.”

You smile with a laugh. “I’ll see you soon,”

He refrained from going back over to you and taking you into his arms as he knew he wouldn’t be able to bring himself to let you go again. “I’ll see you soon, baby,” he agreed and threw his bag into the backseat. “I love you.”

“I love you,”

And then he was gone, and you were left alone on the sidewalk.

“Hey, good to have you back, man,” Vinny greeted as Anakin stumbled his way onto the bus. “How are you doing?”

Anakin laughed as he set his bag down onto the floor before laying down on the couch. He wasn’t ready to get into his bunk since the last time he was in it he was with you. “I’m fucked,” he admitted and rubbed his face. “I miss her already.”

Vinny nodded from his place at the small table. “You’ll be fine. Both of you will be fine,” he assured Anakin as he scrolled through his phone. “Hey, did Liz send you those pics from last night?”

Anakin furrowed his brows as he pulled out his phone. “I don’t know, I’ve barely used my phone today,”

“Check your email,” Vinny suggested as he leaned back against the chair.

Scrolling through various emails and spam alerts, Anakin came to the conclusion that Liz hadn’t sent him anything. “I don’t see them,” he muttered as he looked one last time.

“Really? Weird,” Vinny mumbled. “She sent them to Theo and I.”

Anakin narrowed his eyes as he opened his Instagram app to see if she posted them onto her account. It was then when he saw that she had messaged him on it, and he clicked on the chat without thinking much of it.

Liz had actually sent him the pictures, but through Instagram DM’s and not through email like she did for the other guys. He scrolled through the multitude of photos with a small smile on his lips that quickly disappeared as he read the message she sent with them.

Here are the shots from London! Gotta admit, you look good on camera, but even better off ;) Can’t wait for the other locations! See you tomorrow night.

He read it over a few times before glancing up at Vinny. “Hey, Vin?” He called, hearing his friend hum in response. “Did Liz say anything in her email? Or did she just send the pictures?”

Vinny looked in thought for a second. “Did she say anything? Like what?”

“I don’t know, like….flirty?” Was she flirting with him? He couldn’t tell if that’s what it was or if that was just her personality.

“No,” Vinny laughed, suddenly giving him his full attention. “Why? She sent you something flirty?”

Anakin shrugged as he skimmed over the message again. “No, but she seems kinda….forward,”

“That’s good, no?” Vinny asked as he stood up. “I take it she did send the pictures to you, then?”

“Yeah, through Instagram,”

Vinny looked a tad confused as he stared down at Anakin. “That’s a weird way to get them to you, but at least you have them now,” he offered before wandering off towards the back of the bus.

“Yeah,” Anakin trailed off, knowing that Vinny wouldn’t have been able to hear him. He wasn’t sure how to respond to Liz, and debated on whether or not he should even respond at all if she was actually flirting with him, but then decided that he must be a bit sensitive to everything at the moment since he was already hundreds of miles away from you, and he missed you a lot.

So, he typed out a “Thanks, they look awesome,” and topped it off with a thumbs up emoji before pocketing his phone and burying his face against the armrest of the couch.

183 notes · View notes

nerdanel01 · 5 months ago

Note

Here's an ask about Agnes and Emmrich that I hope leads to a slutty little drabble: we know Agnes has fantasized about Emmrich, but is the reverse also true? What would that look like for Emmrich? When would it have happened in their relationship: before or after she left? How awful did he feel about it?

*laughs nervously* the short answer is… a lot?? And in the most Catholic way possible??? 4k+ below the cut very NSFW

9:48 Dragon

Though he would never admit it to Agnes, the truth of it was, Emmrich found the opera to be just fine. Catching a performance with Agnes was a lovely way to spend an evening, but by no means did that make Emmrich himself any kind of aficionado. It was Agnes’ avid interest that first brought him to the theatre, and Agnes’ continued fervor that kept him coming back: he went, not to see a performance, but to see her —so engaged, so happy.

This opera, in particular, he was finding impossible to enjoy. Agnes had practically begged him to take her to The Marriage of Figaro, and by the title alone, Emmrich had thought it would be innocuous enough. Another light, romantic comedie, like the Donizetti works of which she was so fond.

It was most definitely not that. If the opera was humorous, Emmrich found it to be a dark, almost sadistic kind of humor. The plot centered around the titular servant Figaro and his bride-to-be, Susanna… and their escalating attempts to prevent the master of the house, Count Almaviva, from asserting his droite de seigneur. Emmrich could not fathom how it was that Agnes could so breathlessly throw herself into a plot that all too well reflected what little he knew to be true of her own conception; of the cruelty and the violent torments Agnes’ mother had suffered at the hands of her father. And yet, she seemed unperturbed.

As if that were not bad enough, he could not help but feel (irrationally, of course) that the entire premise of the opera was pointing an accusing finger directly at him. Agnes was not his servant, of course—she was far more than that—but he could not help but feel that his longing for her shared a similar, lecherous undertone to Almaviva’s licentious pursuit of Susanna. Certainly he held professional power over Agnes, as the Count did Susanna; the fact that he was often reluctant to wield it did not wish that fact away. And just like the Count, his advantage of age he held over Agnes was… considerable.

And so, by the second act of the opera, Emmrich had more or less mentally checked out of the performance entirely. Pleasant as the music may have been (when it was not pulsing, throbbing, thrumming with anxiety; imminent danger; repressed sexual desire) Emmrich found his eyes wandering across the theatre: at the orchestra playing below, at the audience seated at the level of the stage, at the wide balconies where even in the dim performance light he could make out figures packed in the seats. He had never been a particularly devout man, but sometimes, when the mood was just right, being in the opera house reminded him of the most peaceful moments he’d ever spent in a Chantry. He would give Agnes that: there was something special about all these people—strangers—gathered in the dark, assembled in the worship of a great piece of art. It was peaceful, to look upon all those dark faces. Something almost holy about it.

Which made what Emmrich saw next all the more upsetting.

As the adolescent servant Cherubino took to the stage, preparing to sing his invented love song for the Countess Almaviva (with whom, Emmrich had gathered, he was hopelessly infatuated), movement drew his eye to the theatre box opposite his, on the lefthand side of the stage.

At first Emmrich blinked, resisting the impulse to shake his head—surely he was seeing things? Were they—? They couldn’t be—! And yet, they were: cozied up in a balcony box all to themselves, a young woman had snuck her hand into her companion’s lap and, by the white flash of her arm in the dim light, Emmrich could tell she was pumping that hand up and down quite enthusiastically. Though her date had taken care to conceal his lap from view by fanning his performance program wide across his legs, it was all too clear exactly what was going on from the open-mouthed, slack expression on his face and the way he was tilting his head back against the chair.

This late in life there was not much that could still shock him, but Emmrich’s jaw fully dropped. At first he merely sat there, stunned, staring… before his senses returned to him, and he snapped his eyes (wide with disbelief) back to the action on the stage, thoughts an absolute whirl. What should he do? Agnes’ attention was fixed on the stage, deeply engrossed by the drama unfolding (though he still could not really understand why); he did not want to draw her focus to the absolutely debased act that was happening just across the room. Should he excuse himself? Rise from the box and alert one of the theatre’s ushers? Was this even something they were trained to deal with?

Perhaps they had stopped; perhaps he had imagined it. But when Emmrich let his eyes slide, as innocuously as he could manage, back to the opposite box, he saw not only that their public affair failed come to a conclusion, but that the man had thrown his arm around the woman’s shoulders, and was rather obscenely squeezing at her breast over her bodice.

´Andraste have mercy!’

Never in his life had he witnessed such indecency, and as one of the most senior members of the Mourn Watch, his presence had been requested at some extremely indecent parties hosted by the noble class. His face was burning with shock and embarrassment. Trying to get ahold of himself—hoping that if he ignored it for long enough, they would cease or (Maker’s breath!) reach the natural conclusion of such affairs and settle down. He turned back to the stage, watching over Agnes’ shoulder at the scene playing out in the Countess’ bedroom, the teenage Cherubino, all hot-blooded and virile, singing at center stage:

“You women who know what love is, Look and tell me if it is within my heart?”

Truly, they were no better than teenagers, those two nobles in flagrante delicto across the theater. Certainly if he, Emmrich, had endured the past three years of his increasingly inescapable (and increasingly inappropriate) desire for Agnes, they should have been able to keep their hands off of each other for three hours.

And yet, as if summoned, he felt the tickle of those depraved imaginings in the back of his mind. He watched the stage at Agnes’ side, over her shoulder; his eyes slid away from Cherubino to trace the delicate black lace of the blouse she wore over her bodice—the woven pattern of the fabric offering a rare, tantalizing glimpse at the bare skin of her shoulder, her collarbone, her neck… the tops of her breasts, straining against her bodice as she took in the aria with ecstatic, rapt attention.

“Let me tell you what I am feeling: It is new to me, and I cannot understand it. I feel affection, I am full of desire, A desire both delightful and miserable…”

He wanted to brush tenderly at the lock of raven-black hair that had escaped her chignon, curled and coiled charmingly tight by the summer humidity. He wanted to lean in close, to breathe hot against her neck, to take the lobe of her ear between his teeth.

“I sigh and lament without wanting to…”

Intrusive thoughts of what it would be like to pull off his dress gloves, to put his hand on her knee. To draw, slowly, inch by inch, her skirts up over her leg, revealing calves clothed in deliciously sheer stockings, the clips and straps of the garters that kept those stockings secure… to round his hand around her knee, for fingertips to creep past the band of her stockings and along the soft skin of her thigh…

“I tremble and I throb without knowing why…”

…and climb higher. To find her swollen? Wet, already? Slick with anticipation at the promise of his touch—

—and at once, the sudden, mortifying tightness in his trousers brought Emmrich back to reality. He pulled the inside of his cheek between top and bottom teeth and bit down hard, trying to anchor himself with the pain and will away his arousal. Agnes, thank the blessed Andraste herself, kept her eyes glued to her opera glasses; she did not turn to see, and so he did not have to excuse, the flush across his cheeks and his ears, nor the far more conspicuous evidence of arousal tenting his trousers.

He did not know what would be worse: if Agnes assumed, rightly, that it was her own presence that had pitched him into the throes of desire, or if she assumed, wrongly, that it had something to do with Cherubino, a woman in men’s clothes playing as an innocent, virgin, teenage boy on the stage below them.

“Though I find peace neither day nor night, Still, I cannot get enough of the feeling.”

Inconspicuously, taking a queue from the deviant across the theatre, Emmrich laid his paper program over his lap. Focused his eyes on his hands. Picked idly at his nails, willing away his desire.

Knowing pettily, venomously, that if he happened to encounter the couple in the opposite box on his way out of the theatre that evening, he would do everything in his power to trip them on their way down the opera house steps.

But of course, in the sudden throng of activity as the curtain fell and the theatre emptied, the offending exhibitionists were nowhere to be seen. Probably gratifying themselves further in the powder room, Emmrich thought with disgust (and though he would never admit it to himself, even under pain of torture or death: envy.)

He wanted nothing more than to get back to the Necropolis, to put the evening and the terribly obvious handjob and horny little Cherubino behind him. But when Agnes threaded her arm through his and tugged him towards the champagne bar, he was as incapable as ever of refusing her—though he almost certainly should have. Though he knew it was ill-advised, he tried (and failed) to put the memory behind him with drink. By the time he had finished his second glass, Agnes was still sipping politely at her first.

But all the drink in the world could not break the spell of her beauty. In the walk from the opera to the bar, more tendrils of hair had shook loose from her bun, and the flyaways curled like tender pea shoots around her head. He loved her most like this, he thought, when the facade of perfection and rigor and discipline she worked so hard to maintain began to fall away. His eyes lingered too long on the crimson print her lips had left on her apricot-colored coupe glass.

Desperate to shake himself out of it, Emmrich confided in her, at last: “Nessa, you will not believe what I witnessed at the theatre tonight.”

She lifted her glass to her mouth, and her bright grey eyes met his, full of curiosity and innocence. “What?”

But he was not even sure how to politely say it. He licked his lips, a wry, disbelieving grin tugging at his mouth as he told her at last, “A noblewoman in one of the balcony boxes opposite ours… manually stimulating her companion under the cover of his paper program during the second act.”

Agnes’ eyes widened; she set her coupe down forcefully enough for the glass to clink on the table top, covering her mouth politely as she coughed up the drink she had accidentally inhaled in surprise.

“You saw what?”

A lovely, delicious color was rising in her cheeks, red to match the stain on her lips.

“Should I repeat myself?” he asked, full of dry humor. “Believe me, I was not sure myself, but when he started groping her over her dress that more or less quelled any lingering doubts I had in my mind.”

Agnes lifted her glass to her mouth once more, her eyes boring holes into the table before her. Whispered, lowly, “Andraste have mercy.”

“That’s exactly what I thought!” Emmrich said, pleased to see her scandalized, to have his own reaction to what had transpired mirrored and confirmed. “I mean, really. It would have been perfectly easy for them to step deeper into the recesses of the box, into the cover of darkness where no one could see them. But did they? No, and I do not believe for a minute that is because concealing themselves did not occur to them. I think they wanted to be exposed. To be witnessed, to be seen.”

But as he continued to speak, Agnes’ blush receded. She watched him, too keenly, over the rim of her glass; she was neither as outraged nor as scandalized as Emmrich wanted her to be. Needed her to be, to draw a line: to stand in firm opposition to the Agnes he had all too readily conjured in his mind: the fictive siren that would gasp at his touch, that would part her legs all too willingly for his hand, without regard for the risk, without a care for who might see them.

“It bothered you quite a lot, didn’t it?” was all she asked him, softly, probingly, when at last he had finished his tirade.

He blinked at her a couple of times. His fingertips found the stem of his third glass of champagne, and he spun it back and forth between forefinger and thumb. “Well—yes,” he managed, at last. A terrible, traitorous heat rising in his cheeks, in his ears. “Did it—does it not bother you?”

Agnes only shrugged and offered him an indifferent smile. “I did not see it,” she said, at last, “engrossed as I was in the music. I am sorry, however, that you found it so distracting.”

“You think it was merely distracting?” Emmrich prompted, in a state of disbelief. “Not… not shameful—nor disrespectful? To the performers, to the rest of the audience?”

The blush had returned to her cheeks. With a nervous smile, she confessed, quietly, “Perhaps I am not as disciplined as you.” She was not looking at him now, staring into the fizzing depths of her coupe glass. “Perhaps… I understand how easy it is, to be suddenly overcome. By the music, by… by desire.”

Obscene scenarios clamored for attention in Emmrich’s mind. An arched back, a cry of pleasure—how beautiful she would look, how desperately he wanted to see her overcome, to be the one responsible for bringing forth such pleasure and desire within her—!

Without looking at him, Agnes lifted the glass to her mouth and drained the rest of it in a single sip. Placing the coupe down with something like a grimace, she raised her hand, motioning for the waiter to bring her another. As soon as he did, she took a second generous gulp.

“But enough of that,” Agnes said at last, reasserting her control over herself, redirecting the conversation. “What did you think of the music?” she asked, then teased him: “The parts of it you were not too distracted to pay attention to, that is.”

The music? She was just going to drop that explosively erotic phrase into the conversation, and then she wanted to talk about the music? Emmrich fumbled for something intelligent to say. “I thought the basso who sang Figaro had a very fine voice.”

“Oh, did he not?” Agnes effused; and then she was off, chatting a million miles an hour about everything she knew about that particular Rivaini singer, his training, the roles he had performed in other venues, the lyrical quality of his singing. Emmrich nursed his champagne, happy to simply listen to her as he fought to subdue the heat in his face.

By the time they returned to the Necropolis at last it was late, the halls silent. Agnes had held his arm the whole way back—not, he feared, out of affection for him, but out of concern that he had drank too much, that without her support he might stumble and fall. He had drank too much, which was both embarrassing and most unbecoming. Worse still, the drink had done nothing to dispel the ludicrous fever those idiots in the opera had set in his blood; it had only fanned the flames. When they had reached the door to his bedroom, Emmrich had stopped for a moment, hovered awkwardly in front of Agnes as he debated, then decided against, pressing a grateful kiss to her brow. He did not think, in his current temperament, he could manage to keep it appropriately chaste.

Indeed, as soon as the door had closed behind him and he was left to his privacy, all the intrusive thoughts he had fought in the theatre and the in the bar and on the long walk home returned to him, tormenting him: the light rasp of his nails along the inside of her thigh; the fine hair of her legs standing on end in the wake of those touches; the damp warmth of her smallclothes as he’d push them aside; her anxious little whisper, aroused, anticipatory, cautious: “Emmrich, your nails…” and how he might respond, lips brushing against her ear, “I will be most careful with you.” Throbbing and freezing and burning like poor Cherubino, like a young man a quarter of his age as he imagined her wetness, the slickness of her beneath his fingertips as he circled her bud—

(There was nothing for it now but to see it through. Only one way to truly relieve himself, to exorcise the thoughts that haunted him so at last he could rest. Hastily, inarticulate drunken fingers stumbling over buttons, he unfastened his trousers and dropped onto the edge of his bed.)

—her parted lips, the little hitches in her breath, the pleasure sounds she would try to stifle as (carefully, so carefully, true to his word) he would slip middle-and-forefinger deep into her hot wet heat—

(Ragged edge to his breath like torn parchment as he closes his hand around himself and begins to stroke. Delicious tightness in his core, feet arching against the floor.)

—placing a kiss on her neck. Breathing hotly against her ear. Agnes’ hands trembling, her opera glasses shaking in her hands as her satisfaction builds, mounts; a keening cry; the way her back would snap, her hips driving his fingers into her, grinding against the palm of his hand—her cunt tightening reflexively around him—

(Free hand white-knuckling, twisted in his bedsheets. A gasp and low groan as fist tightens over the slick head of his arousal. It’s rotten, it’s foul, it’s wrong in a thousand ways to imagine her this way—but it feels much too good to stop.)

—would she follow him back after? Rise before the curtain had fully fallen, before the applause had concluded, racing with him back to the Necropolis, creeping into his room? The blush of her face in the champagne bar: “Perhaps I know how easily it is to be overcome by desire.” To hold her in his arms, to kiss her in this room—! Loose the buttons on her blouse and slide the lace past her bare shoulder, bare neck, bare clavicle… lifting her skirts, sinking into her—

(“Hha—ahh! Nessa—!”)

—with her legs wrapped tightly around his waist, her hands clawing across his back for purchase, enveloped in the smell of her, by her warmth… here, in the privacy of the bedchamber, where she would not have to hide her pleasure sounds but could pitch his name upon them like a storm-tossed ship, scream it as she reached the height of her pleasure—

Tension in his body snapping white-hot, shooting sparks through his limbs and coiling in his core, Emmrich held the back of his hand firmly against his mouth to stifle his own obscene, satisfied groan as he spilled into his hand. He came so hard it left his toes curling; thighs shaking; short of breath.

The next day, he did not arrive at their study until nearly noon.

He had woken hungover, head pounding, light-sensitive. But that discomfort was nothing compared to the agonizing guilt and shame that washed over him when he recalled the events of the night prior. Why couldn’t he have minded his own business? He should not have let what he saw in the theater get under his skin; it was inconceivable to him in the sober light of morning that he had thought telling Agnes about it was a good idea. Had he really used the words ‘manually stimulating’? How uncomfortable had he made her? He recalled how quickly Agnes had changed the conversation, cringed at how long he had lingered over it. Fighting through the hangover to shower and shave did nothing to cleanse the pervasive filthiness he felt.

He could not remember the last time he had attended Chantry service—but some habits were difficult to break. Seeking even the slightest reprieve of absolution, he left the Necropolis shortly after dawn, heading towards the Chantry in Nevarra City. But even among the incense and the singing Mothers, he could not escape from his regret, the Canticle of Threnodies echoing among the vaulted ceiling in accusation:

Marvel at perfection, for it is fleeting. You have brought Sin to Heaven And doom upon all the world.

He had something beautiful—a partner to stand by him, to protect and care for him—and he was going to spoil it, desecrate it as thoroughly as the Tevinter Magisters of old had corrupted the Golden City of the Maker. Every lurid imagining he indulged in, he knew, brought him closer and closer to doing irreparable harm to the thing in his life most precious to him.

When at last he returned to the Necropolis, Agnes was already in the study, waiting for him. The smell of lavender oil was thick in the air; she must have spent the morning cleaning, a task which he had repeatedly told her she need not take upon herself, and one to which she repeatedly insisted upon undertaking nevertheless. Now she stood at one of the tables with Wilfred at her side, watching him with scrutiny as he clumsily tried to grind down some fresh herbs, his bony hands struggling with the mortar and pestle.

She looked up at him the minute he entered, her bright eyes full of anticipation—and was that a hint of concern?

“Where were you?”

Beaten down by his excessive drinking and shame alike, Emmrich did not have the willpower within him to lie. “In Nevarra City. I attended Chantry services this morning.”

Agnes smiled, like it was a joke. “No, really, where were you? You missed breakfast. I was not sure you’d want to eat after last night, but I saved you a bit of toast, just in case.”

Emmrich took a deep breath, following the slender line of her arm to the table near the hearth, where four slices of toast were stacked on a plate beside an artful dollop of jam and a pat of butter. Though his stomach still felt wretched, he knew eating would probably help. “Chantry services, really,” he repeated, again, in answer to her question, his tone resigned. He walked to the table, tore a slice of toast in half and lifted it to his mouth without bothering with the ornamentation of butter or jam—he did not think his stomach could endure the grease nor the sweetness. “Thank you, dear, for saving me something to eat.”

“Seriously?” Agnes asked. Emmrich did not have to look up to know the look of incredulous disbelief on her face. It was plain by the tone of her voice.

Emmrich chewed through the dry toast, swallowed. His stomach gave a discontented growl, awakening at the prospect of food. “Quite seriously,” he answered at last. “Though I am far from the most devout among the Mourn Watch, old habits are difficult to shake. Every once in a while, it’s like an itch that needs to be scratched.” Not that the debasement and self-flagellation he frequently associated with Chantry service had done him any particular good this morning.

Agnes gave a low huff of amusement. Without needing to be asked—knowing, as she knew him so well, that the toast would go down easier with a bit of tea to help it—she crossed the room, cast iron teapot in hand, and bent before the heart to suspend it over the fire.

“So did it?” she teased him. “Scratch your itch?”

With her back turned to him, she did not see the ugly grimace he made, the way his lips curled into a frustrated scowl at his own lack of discipline. Nor did she see, blessedly, the way his eyes were fixed upon her: her narrow waist, the pert swell of her backside as she bent over the fire.

“No, I’m afraid not,” Emmrich said, tearing his eyes away to stare at his toast. “Not this time.” He recalled to himself the verse from Threnodies, repeated it in his mind, beating himself against it until it obliterated the image of her (legs spread, back arched) that had begun to resurface in his mind:

Those who had once been mage-lords, The brightest of their age, Were no longer men, but monsters.

#emmrich volkarin #emmrook #lost my mind for a minute there but it's all good

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apomaro-mellow · 7 months ago

Text

Hot for Teacher(s) 9

Part 8 / AO3 Link

Eddie felt like he blacked out. One moment he was on stage, playing his heart out, the next, Steve was leading him by the hand back to his car. Eddie had come to the venue with one of his bandmates, instruments in the back. When they got to Steve’s car, the keys were put in his hand.

“Your place”, Steve said, going around to the passenger side.

Eddie nodded hurriedly and in a rush of movements, they were off. He worried for a split second about the state of his apartment but those thoughts were pushed out when he felt Steve’s hand on his thigh. In the close space of the car, Eddie could smell him so deeply. He took a deep breath.

“You looked great up there”, Steve said. “Have you been playing long?”

“Since I was a kid”, Eddie answered, wishing with all his might that they could get a red light just so he could look at Steve at least once. It had been only a few minutes but even that was too long. “My mom put a guitar in my hand and it was like…nothing was ever the same.”

“A natural.” Steve started to stroke his thigh.

They came to an apartment complex and Eddie led the way up to the third floor. They got to his place and he paused as he unlocked the door. He turned to Steve with a sheepish expression.

“Gimme just one minute.”

Steve rolled his eyes. “Eddie, I live with a child. A little untidiness isn’t going to turn me off.”

“I’d rather not welcome comparisons to a kid”, Eddie said.

“Fair enough. Go on, go and spruce it up before I see.”

Eddie thanked him and then went inside. Steve could hear movement from behind the door and after about a minute, Eddie opened it again. Steve took everything in and looked around. It had the makings of the usual bachelor pad, everything here was clearly Eddie’s. All meant for a single alpha. He smiled when he saw the teacher manuals, bookmarks sticking out from the lesson he’d left off at.

Part of him wanted to explore some more, see all the little pieces of Eddie that could be found. But then there was a warmth against his back and a nose at his neck. Eddie’s arms snaked around his waist.

“I’d love to give you the grand tour. Starting with the bedroom~”

“I bet you say that to all the groupies.”

“You’re the only one hot enough to make it this far”, Eddie said, turning Steve in his arms. “And you didn’t even have to throw me your panties.”

“Hmm, sounds to me like you don’t even want them tossed to you”, Steve teased. “And after all the trouble I went through…”

“‘Trouble’?”, Eddie perked at that.

“Lead the way.”

Eddie released Steve, holding his hand only to take him to his bedroom. Steve closed the door behind them and then pushed Eddie onto the bed. Eddie leaned back on his elbows to watch Steve make a show of removing his jacket and shirt. Then he unbuttoned his pants and Eddie saw a sneak peek of what was to come. Steve licked his lips as he watched the alpha’s eyes darken and the scent of arousal began to fill the room.

Steve took off everything else, leaving only the black thong. The darkness of the fabric meant that Eddie couldn’t see the wet patch between his legs. But the way his nostrils flared, he could probably smell it. Steve walked closer and Eddie sat up, his hands moving reverently like he wasn’t sure if he was allowed to touch.

Taking the initiative, Steve brought Eddie’s hands to his hips. Eddie licked his lips as his eyes traveled up and down the other man’s body, lingering on what must be a sopping wet cunt. He swallowed thickly.

“When was the last time someone ate you out baby?”

“Well-”, Steve was saved from answering by Eddie diving face first, mouthing at his crotch like a man starved. His knees buckled and one hand went to Eddie’s shoulder while the other went to the back of his head, cradling it there.

Eddie had been able to smell his wetness. Now he could actually feel and taste it. And it was so. Fucking. Good. He lifted one of Steve’s legs over his shoulders to spread him even more, still licking the fabric and sucking him through it. Eddie felt the leg by his ear tremble and he looked up. The purr that left his body, seeing Steve enraptured because of him, it must’ve traveled from his throat to his lips because Steve let out a purr of his own.

Steve felt Eddie pulled off and nearly let out a whine when he found himself on the bed. His legs must’ve been weaker than he’d thought if he was able to be moved like that. Eddie kissed him sweetly and then kissed down his neck, to his chest.

“How the hell do you still have so many clothes?”, Steve breathed out.

“Natural talent”, Eddie winked. But he was beginning to overheat, so he paused to started undressing himself. He moved just a tad slower when he realized Steve’s hand was between his legs, stroking himself.

“Careful Mr. Harrington. I might need to start charging you for the show.”

Steve snickered. “Please do not call me ‘Mr. Harrington’. Makes me think of my students.”

“Alright”, Eddie stripped off the last bit of clothing. “How’s about baby?” He kissed Steve’s ankle. “Or sweetheart?” He kissed his calf. “Angel face?” He gave one of Steve’s thighs a soft bite.

“Yes.”

Eddie peeled off the thong, duty completed and watched a string of slick try to stay attached. It was soaked from them both and Eddie was fighting the urge to stuff his face in it and he wondered how attached Steve was to this particular piece of underwear.

“I can tell you wanna lick it”, Steve said. “But wouldn’t you rather have the real thing?” He used his fingers to spread himself and a thick drop of pre cum dripped from Eddie’s cock.

Permission given, Eddie dove in, his hips rutting against the bed as he ate Steve out. It was so soft and warm, he felt like he could get lost in it. All Steve saw was a mop of dark curls between his legs but he could feel everything Eddie was doing and it made him see stars. He felt something else prod him and when he looked down, Eddie was gazing up at him, asking with his eyes while his lips were wrapped around his clit.

Steve nodded and then he felt a finger push inside. Eddie treated him gentle, which Steve appreciated. He’d done his best to prep for the night, knowing what he wanted. But the fact that Eddie was taking his time, was enjoying the scenic route. Whenever his mouth left his pussy it was to lick his thighs, to kiss his hips, even to nuzzle his bush like every part of him was worth savoring.

During all this, he spread Steve open, bringing him to the brink before pulling back. Steve wanted to be frustrated but he liked going the long way. No rush, no fuss. He was more than happy to cum on Eddie’s cock. If it was like this now…he could only imagine during a heat or a rut.

Steve was lost in the thought as Eddie pulled his fingers out and reached for a condom. Steve sat up a little and held a hand out.

“Let me.”

When Eddie handed it to him, Steve took his time too. He got up on his knees and scented Eddie’s neck. That aroma was no longer just safety when he was on the brink of rejection sickness. It was a deep fondness, a strong attraction, and the utmost trust. Steve licked his throat and collarbone while looking down and placing the condom onto him. Even just the feather light touches were almost too much for him and he sucked in a breath.

“You don’t know what you do to me, sweetness”, he said as he laid kisses on Steve’s shoulder.

Steve used his fingertip to play with Eddie’s tip. “I think I have an idea.”

Eddie pushed him back down and lined himself up. He waited for Steve’s nod and then began to push inside. Steve waited until he was fully inside and then wrapped both his arms and legs around him.

“Feels so good, you’re so deep, fuck.”

Eddie growled in his ear as he started to move. Steve smelled so delicious. Eddie’s nose was pressed into his neck, fighting the urge to bite, to claim him, to make Steve his own. Steve wasn’t helping things by actually baring it to him, back arching as they pushed and pulled into each other. Everything about Steve was telling him to do it, to seal the deal.

Everything but Steve’s own words.

So Eddie stayed his teeth. But he was going to make sure that before the night was through that Steve would be carrying his scent home with him.

Steve was no nun, there had been partners after Billy, here and there, and of course, he had his own heats to deal with. But nothing could have prepared him for the way his orgasm crashed over him when Eddie thrusted just right. He scratched down his back (he’d apologize later) as his cunt squeezed down, trying to take his knot and milk it for everything.

He was still riding the wave when he felt that knot finally come inside and Eddie bit down on his shoulder as he came. For a few moments, all they did was breathe together. Eddie brushed the sweaty hairs away from Steve’s forehead and kissed it. Words lingered on his lips. Words that felt too heavy to say. So for now, he would let his body do the talking.

There was a split second where Eddie thought of everything the words might entail - changing his address, being a sudden parent to a six year old and all that it required, Steve learning about him and vice versa. It all sounded too good to be true. Definitely not the kind of pillow talk after having sex for the first time. So all he said was:

“Sorry. Didn’t mean to pop it in like that”, he said, moving them to their sides.

“It’s fine. Not like I’m going anywhere soon. Hope you weren’t expecting to kick me outta bed.”

“Honey, it’s all yours. I’ll give you the deed and everything.”

“Actually, did you know that until the 50’s there was something called ‘common scent law’ that-no wait, nevermind”, Steve covered his face with his hand.

Eddie knew that look. The ‘I had to learn something to teach my students and now I have an abundance of knowledge on this obscure subject’. He pushed a lock of Steve’s hair behind his ear and then kissed the hand that was hiding his face.

“We’re gonna be here a while, sweetness. Go ahead and tell me about now defunct laws.”

The way Steve melted, Eddie wished he could bottle it up and keep it forever.

Part 10 coming soon