#( and so many cliches tbh that's why i cringe at the thought of it )

[ylangelegy]

Just read the seungcheol x makeup artist and just wanted to let you know you have such a great writing style! The flow and pacing is incredible and I cant wait to see how develops further😍😍

hello, anon! thank you so much for this (⁀ᗢ⁀) is it casual now? is actually a monster of a fic (60k words and still ongoing,,) so i need to do a lot of hard-editing to make it make sense lol. but i'm glad you enjoyed the little teaser that's up!

[beastabyss666]

Ok......So, the new HB episode is out, how unexpected for me. I apologize to my fellow readers for not reviewing the previous episode, but I was so tired and busy, having to deal with a lot of work. The cat must have got my tongue when I saw the dildo scene, I'm sorry. And what can I say......Actually, this episode is the best one in the 2 season at this moment. I mean, at least it wasn't that cringe and plot ruining as the other ones. ‼️TW‼️: Abuse, **cest

The animation looks pretty good in action scenes(and not so good in other, especially when some characters speak). The backgrounds look good, and I somewhat like the fact that the Sloth Ring is pink. Looks so sweet, bubblegum and cotton candy-like. But the floating pieces of ground are very cliche for a fantasy world. Also I think there were too many sound effects, when sometimes it feels like there's a lack of them. In principle, everything is as always. Stolas is a damsel in distress again, Moxxie and Millie are boring, Stella is evil(and extremely stupid for some reason), Blitzo is loud and annoying and spits cuss words every second because the authors think it's funny. Also Loona just...... didn't speak in this ep at all. No words. Don't know if it's good or not. The plotline of her going to doctor and being afraid of shots is pretty boring, tbh. I still have no idea why hellhounds are treated like some pets in this universe when they're competent and sensible beings. Also, I don't know if anyone told that or this is just me, but I absolutely hate the idea of putting fucking westerns in "Hell". I know Vivzie isn't so original and her universe is super bland and uninteresting, but shit, westerns just don't stick in the setting of Hell at all, it's not that vibe and it looks ridiculous. And that's not because I don't like westerns. Striker's song felt absolutely redundant, and Striker himself seems....unnatural? Seems like Vivzie made him that masculine bigot guy who's bigheaded and is obsessed with having a huge cock(because dicks are funny according to the writers). They have finally showed Andrealphus, Stella's brother, and there's nothing interesting about him to say. I'm just glad they didn't make him a stereotypical gay. Knowing Vivzie's "rep" and how feminine he looks, it would be predictable. As I've said before, he looks like a shameless Elsa ripoff, as his blue ice castle(covered with red fucking sky, god, these palette choices burn out my eyes). I've heard some controversial and suspicious stuff considering him and Stella(more precisely, someone says that originally they were going to have **cestuous relationship). Not sure if it's true, and I do hope that Vivzie won't go so far in making Stella an unredeemable villain.

I didn't see anything "weird" or vulgar in their conversation, it felt like puerility. I like to imagine that their relationship is like a niminy-piminy brother always cheering up and complimenting his little sis because he can. I've seen some cartoons with a similar character dynamic and a certain part of their fandoms found indecent connotation in this, and that's their problems in their depravity. And yeah, I know that my thoughts aren't true and they obviously have a manipulative relationship. Andre straight up insulted Stella and manipulated her, btw. If Viv really wanna do them having **cest – fine, another reason to quit watching this show. But something tells me that she won't dare to lose a bunch of fans and be yet again cancelled in social networks.

Summing up, this episode was pretty good by the standards of the season and bad by the standards of..... something qualitative I guess? Viv still hasn't learned how to separate drama from comedy, which makes it difficult, no, impossible to feel Stolas' sad shit. This character is one of my personal winners in the list of the most repulsive and annoying creatures and him always being sex-crazed about Blitzo pisses me off. How the hell are we supposed to take him seriously if all he wants is a dick? The rest of the time he whines about how unhappy he is and pretends to care about his daughter. Season 2 continues to look like terrible Wattpad fanfiction and it discourages from watching this series. It's not even fun to hate or criticize it anymore, it's just...... Ehh.

[cosmic-hearts]

sunshower | lee jeno

lee jeno x reader 

genres; fluff, romance, very slight angst 

warnings; real cringey and cliche tbh (but otherwise none)

summary: a sunshower is a meteorological phenomenon in which rain falls while the sun is shining. 

You always knew you were a child of the rain. In fact, the day you were born, the city was struck by one of the heaviest thunderstorms ever in history, and for the first few days of your life, lightning bolts would clash in deafening roars and hail would descend, spiralling sharply through the chaos under the grey skies as you slept soundly through it all. Born of storms and raised by thunder, you felt most alive when the cold wind nipped at your ears and icy droplets of rain pricked at your skin, sending spurts of electricity shooting through your system. 

You also knew that not everyone liked the rain. In fact, some others hated it. This fact irked you very much— after all, who could detest of the feeling of sweet little drops of coolness kissing one’s skin lightly, like sprinklings of stardust, of the misty, elusive wind gently nuzzling one’s hair like the touch of a familiar lover?

Well, apparently Lee Jeno did. 

If you were the heiress of the storm, Lee Jeno was the descendant of the sun. 

For into his veins were woven sunshine and daylight, and when he smiled, his eyes morphed into sunbeams, casting rays of light so unbelievably bright. The only thing dark about him was his hair, but even so, it was a luxuriant sort of black that shone under the sunlight, giving it a dappled glow. His very being exuded warmth, drawing people to him like moths to a flame. Unlike the storm which holds a more covert, concealed sort of charm people find harder to uncover, the sun’s glory is highly visible, its warm rays easily felt and indulged in. 

That was Lee Jeno. The polar opposite of you. 

And you were perfectly happy to stay clear of him like you always did; after all, how could the sun and the storm coexist? 

He couldn’t seem to do the same, though. 

The clashing of elemental forces began when he caught you playing truant during gym class. In your defence, you simply couldn’t help yourself; the skies had darkened to a lovely silvery hue and a light, hazy drizzle had begun. This kind of rain was one of your many favourites, because it meant that you could frolic freely within its depths without fear of getting too wet and therefore sick. You had tried going out into a massive storm before, and it hadn’t gone down well with both your immune system and your parents. 

So the weather was simply irresistible, and the rain had called enticingly out to you in sweet, seductive whispers. You couldn’t miss this opportunity. And so when you thought no one was paying attention, you slipped quietly out of gym class and headed straight for the rooftop, where you could bask in the pure, unadulterated joy of being alone with the one thing you love most. 

All was well, until a voice struck you out of your reverie, and that’s when you looked up to see Lee Jeno coming towards you with a frown on his usually cheerful face. 

“What are you doing out here?” His voice is muffled slightly by the pitter-patter of raindrops colliding onto the cement beneath your feet.

Truth to be told, this is the first time you’re seeing him upset. Usually he’s always smiling, and nothing seems to faze him. 

“I could say the same to you,” you shoot back, annoyed that your peace has been disturbed. You’re not antisocial—at least, you wouldn’t admit you were—but you just really treasure your alone time. Being with people drains the energy out of your system, but for Lee Jeno, it seems like he thrives off being around others, like a leech feeding off their energy. 

“I followed you,” Jeno says matter-of-factly, “I was curious.”

You roll your eyes and swing your feet over the ledge, dangling them over the cityscape below you. Jeno’s eyes widen at this and he immediately rushes to your side, placing his hands firmly on your shoulders, steadying you. 

“What are you doing?!” He exclaims, visibly shaken by your bold action. 

His touch sends heatwaves of shock burning through your skin and fizzing through your nerves. Perhaps it is because he is the sun and you are rain, so his touch feels extra hot to you. So warm and foreign is this feeling that you almost flinch under his palm. 

“Look, it’s fine. I do this all the time,” you say curtly, moving your shoulder ever-so-slightly to shake off his hold. 

At this, Jeno sighs, resigned to your unwavering obstinance. “Okay, fine. But you’re gonna catch a cold if you stay out here for too long.”

“Jeno, why do you care?” You weren’t trying to be a smart mouth, but you genuinely could not fathom Lee Jeno’s sudden interest in caring for your welfare. You two had never been close, nor was he responsible for you in any way.

“I’m class president. It’s my duty to look out for my classmates,” he says robotically, and it sounds rehearsed to your ears. 

You smirk a little. “Go look after the rest of them at gym class then. Make sure they don’t get hurt.” 

Jeno sighs, before crouching down on the ground and taking a seat beside you. He crosses his legs, though; he harbours no particular desire to fall to his death. 

“I was just worried, all right? I mean, who goes out to the rooftop in this weather?”

You ignore his yapping by your ear, instead holding out your hand, imagining resting all your burdens and troubles on your palm. With every raindrop that comes into contact with your palm, you feel life’s worries being washed away into oblivion, gifting you with a clean, fresh slate that’ll last until the next rainfall. You’d been doing this since you were young; it amused your parents to no end, but no one understood the significance of this little ritual you held dear to your heart.

“You’re noisy,” you say, your tone not biting or sharp but more factual. “You talk a lot, Jeno.” 

At this Jeno stops rambling, opting instead to scratch the back of his neck with his hand. “Ah, really? I’m just… trying to fill the silence, I guess. You’re really quiet, you know.” 

You smile slightly and turn your head to the side so that Jeno can’t see it. 

“I have to go now. I’ll just… tell Mr Kim that you’re not feeling well.”

You raise an eyebrow. “You’re not going to report me?”

At this, Jeno chuckles lightly. “Hey, I can’t fault you for hating fitness conditioning, can I? Who in their right mind likes burpees?”

You actually don’t mind the burpees, but you decide not to tell him the real reason you’re skipping. Not that you mind, but he’d probably brand you a freak if he didn’t already think you one. Again, not that you mind.

“But I will report you if you really get sick in the rain. Here,” Jeno says, shrugging off his jacket and placing it around your shoulders, as if it were the most natural thing to do. When his fingertips accidentally brush against your neck you feel a warm, crimson blush creeping across your cheekbones and you’re momentarily dazed. Every time he touches you it feels like you’ve been grazed by a ray of sunlight— so warm and gentle it feels that you honestly can’t find it in yourself to complain. Plus his jacket feels so cosy, and despite it being oversized it somehow manages to be a perfect fit for you. And you’re a sucker for oversized sweaters, especially during the rainy season.

“Much better,” he declares in satisfaction, “I’ll see you in class later.”

—

You don’t know what came over you when you caught sight of Lee Jeno a few weeks later stuck at the school gate, unable to go home because of the pouring rain, and instantly deciding that you couldn’t just pretend to not notice him and leave. 

You take a deep breath, braving yourself for the sacrifice you were about to make.

Marching right up to him, you thrust your only umbrella into his hand, before turning immediately on your heel and running off into the embrace of the heavy downpour, hearing Jeno yell your name amid the howling winds but refusing to look back.

I must be the greatest fool ever, you think to yourself as you feel your clothes beginning to cling to your skin, and cringe at the feeling of water seeping into your shoes and permeating through your socks. You weren’t exactly the most self-sacrificing person, and you have no idea what possessed you to act like an impulsive, idiotic teenager incapable of rational thought.

Cheers to getting a hell of a dressing-down from your mom about running in the rain. This wouldn’t be the first time, but if she knows you did it deliberately to help someone else, especially since it’s not like you forgot your umbrella or anything… You couldn’t even begin to fathom the consequences.

You reach the traffic light, where unfortunately you have to wait in the rain for the light to turn green, and in the meantime, the cold begins to ooze into your bones. The harsh wind pinches the tips of your ears and an involuntary shudder passes through your body. It’s especially cold today; you really don’t get cold easily and in fact you revel in it most times, but this is just too much. 

Suddenly the rain pouring over you seems to cease; it’s as though an imaginary umbrella has been held over your head. When you look you, you realize that it’s not an imaginary umbrella but a real one, and with a jolt you realize that it is in fact your umbrella and Lee Jeno is towering over you, his expression dark, perhaps even darker than the clouds marring the sky. 

“You’re so stupid, Y/N,” he says in a chiding tone, and you feel like a scolded puppy, but at the same time you can’t ignore the feeling of his warm breath hitting your cheek as he wraps an arm around your shoulders, pulling you close to him. The chill in your bloodstream begins to abate, replaced by a tingling sense of warmth that Jeno’s body heat provides. 

“Why the heck did you do that? Shit, you’re cold as ice. You’re gonna get sick tomorrow,” Jeno says, eyebrows furrowed deep with lines of worry. You looks even more upset than when he did when he caught you on the rooftop, and it scares you a little since Lee Jeno is never upset. 

“I-I’m fine,” you begin to stutter but you can barely squeeze another utterance in when you break out into a violent sneeze, and Jeno tightens his grip around you, pulling you impossibly closer to him.

“I’ll walk you to the bus stop,” he says, tone softer now, eyes gentler, too. You can barely hear him against the sound of rain lashing against the sidewalk but you know that his voice is strong and firm and strangely enough it comforts you, makes you feel safe. 

For the first time, you learn what it feels like to bask in someone’s warmth and company, even if no words are exchanged. Sometimes, silence deepens relationships the same way conversation does.

Honestly, It feels nice. 

It feels even better when Jeno hands you his sweater afterwards, a big grey oversized thing which smells warm and lemony and fresh, and makes sure you’re all snugly wrapped up before leaving you. 

That same day, after the cessation of the storm, a dazzling rainbow breaks through the saturnine clouds and you feel your heart lift with wings of hope. 

—

You hold two freshly washed and dried, neatly folded sweaters in your arms as you walk towards Jeno’s locker, where he’s standing with his back against the metal door. 

Just as you’re about to call out to him, a girl walks up to him and when Jeno sees her he breaks out into the largest smile you’ve ever seen, as if he’d just struck gold. It struck you then, how good they looked together; they both had that million-dollar smile that could light up the world and give direction to all the lost planets of the universe; they both had beautiful, bright smiling eyes, and they both looked like the world around them had dissolved into oblivion as they basked in each other’s company. 

You watch as the girl slips something into his hands, and his smile grows impossibly larger; it’s almost blinding. He places his hand on top of her head, ruffling her strawberry blonde tresses while she pouts in pseudo-annoyance.

If Jeno was your sun, this girl had to be his.

A slight, painful twinge seizes your heart. It’s slight, but it’s sharp. 

For you were perfectly aware that you could never be his sunshine.

Eyes downcast, you turn away from them and slip back into the shadows, just as huge storm clouds begin to loom in the overhead sky.

—

“I knew I’d find you here.”

The chilly winds that whipped your hair into tousled, tangled locks ceased the moment Jeno snuck out onto the rooftop to find you, armed with a big grin and his usual cheery countenance. You give him a feeble smile in return. 

“Here, take this. It’s good for colds,” Jeno says, thrusting a thin tea packet into your hands. 

“I’m not sick.”

“Hey, just take it, all right? I literally had to beg my sister for it; this is her favourite tea and she refuses to share it with anyone. After you braved that storm yesterday you’re bound to get a cold sooner or later.”

“Your… sister?” 

“Yeah, my little sister. She’s a selfish little brat, but I managed to convince her to give me one. Promise me you’ll drink it, I have to do all her chores for tonight in return,”Jeno says, insistent, as he curls his lips into a pout. How adorable. 

“O-Okay,” you say, still reeling slightly over the shock of having discovered that the girl that nearly caused you to lose your composure, was, in fact, Jeno’s younger sister. That explained the undeniable genetics.

“Thank you, Jeno,” you say sincerely, slipping the little packet of ginger tea in your coat pocket, “Help me say thank you to your sister as well. She’s adorable. You’re really lucky to have her.” She’s really lucky to have you. 

Jeno’s eyes widen at this and he nudges your shoulder in disbelief. “Hey, what are you saying? She’s lucky to have me as her older brother! The things I do for that little rascal. There was this one time she…”

You would have liked to say that you were paying attention to Jeno’s words, but unfortunately you were only paying attention to him; you get sucked into the gentleness of his gaze and it’s hard for you to focus on the utterances leaving his cherry lips. His eyes are beamy black, like pools of obsidian ink, yet their shine is so impossibly lustrous that it captivates you in a stronghold and refuses to let you go. 

And that’s when you realize that you’ve fallen irrevocably in love with the sun. 

—

With the cognizance that you had fallen in love with Lee Jeno, the boy who had been handcrafted by Apollo himself, came the crushing realization that your feelings would amount to nothing. 

He would never like you in that way, not when you two were polar opposites, elements of nature that should not and cannot coexist. He was a brilliant, vivid flame; you were the wind that snuffed it out. It wasn’t that you looked down on yourself or anything or thought that you weren’t good enough for him, you just thought you two couldn’t be more incompatible and being around him would just drive the wedge deeper into your heart, the wedge that told you that you two would never work. 

So you began your heart-wrenching struggle to distance yourself from him, to pretend that the spark between you two didn’t exist, that your feelings for him didn’t exist.

Jeno isn’t dumb; he’s painfully aware of the way you avoid his gaze, respond to his morning greetings with a perfunctory nod, pick the seat furthest away from him as possible during classes and bolt out of the classroom as soon as class ends, before he has the opportunity to get to you. He’s also deeply plagued with the worry that he’s scared you away with his advances; what if you found him annoying or worse, feared him? He’s tried his best to befriend you in the gentlest way possible, suppressing the urge within him that desires to let his true feelings out to you, telling himself not to rush things. 

Yes, Lee Jeno is in love with you, perhaps even more so than you were with him. He had been deeply intrigued by your love for the rain, by the way your eyes lit up whenever there was a downpour, by the way you so intrepidly embraced the element most people shied away from. The day you sacrificed your umbrella for him, as he watched your silhouette fade away into the rain, he felt so loved, but he also felt so damn angry at you for compromising your health for his sake, and a sleepless night confirmed that this mess of emotions was symbolic of the love he harboured for you. And soon it manifested in every little thing; just meeting your gaze was enough to make him weak, every friendly touch he shared with you was enough to set his heart on fire. He wishes so badly to be able to hold you closer, but he knows that you’re too amazing to fall for a guy like him, and he’s content with just being friends and getting to see your smile everyday. 

So it pains him to no end when you avoid him, and he spends every waking moment trying to figure out why.

Then it hits him.

What if you found out?

The thought is absolutely unbearable, and as though he’s been galvanized into action by some unseen force, he races out into the pouring rain onto the rooftop, where he knows you’d seek refuge. 

Indeed, there you sit, holding out your hand to the sky, letting the drops of cool rain rinse away the worries on your palm. Unbeknownst to Jeno, today you had mentally placed on it your love for him and commanded the rain to wash it away into obscurity. Usually this ritual is a refreshing process for you, and lifts all your burdens off your shoulders, but today it simply makes your heart grow heavier, and with every drop of rain that lands on your skin you feel a sort of aching emptiness gnaw away at your soul. 

I’m sorry, Jeno.

Suddenly, your feel a strong, warm grip on your outstretched palm, and as you squint you realize that Jeno is in front of you, interlacing his fingers with yours as he brings your palm down, away from the rain and by his side. 

He takes a deep breath, and as you look closely at him you realize that his face is wet and his eyes are red, and you can’t tell whether he got soaked in the rain or he’s been crying.

“Hey,” he whispers, his voice a soft baritone, and your resolve just about crumbles right then and there. You didn’t realize how much you missed his voice, his face, his presence, his everything.

“I’m so sorry,” he says, stepping closer to you, your legs almost pressing against his torso. “I shouldn’t have fallen in love with you.”

That is when your universe ceases rotation.

“Y-You what?”

“I’m in love with you, Y/N. I know I ruined things between us by falling in love with you, and I’m really sorry. I just… I can’t help it. I know you don’t feel the same way, that’s why you’re avoiding me, but I really needed to talk to you and—,”

“Lee Jeno, stop it.”

Jeno’s eyes widen in hurt and his grip on your hand loosens, his gaze downcast. “Sorry.”

“N-No, that’s not what I meant. I have something to say.”

You suck in a deep breath, and when you take his other hand in yours, he looks up at you again, question filling his eyes.

“Listen carefully, all right? I… I’m not avoiding you because I don’t like you, I’m avoiding you because… I like you so much that it hurts being around you knowing that you won’t like me back.” 

It takes a moment for the impact of your words to hit Jeno, and when it finally registers, when he’s untangled your mess of verbalization to uncover your heart that now beats for him, he breaks out into the most beautiful smile, eyes disappearing into little crescents. 

“Will you let me show you how much I like you?” Jeno asks, puppy eyes alight with hope. 

You nod slightly, and Jeno raises both hands to cup your cheeks. His touch feels like the soft caress of warm sunglow, and you feel your cheeks burn in all their crimson glory. If Jeno noticed it, he doesn’t show it, as he’s too busy trying to calm his own beating heart. His eyes flutter shut and he presses his lips against yours, and all your thoughts halt. 

His lips are slow, sweet and gentle against yours, and yet it is more than anything you could ever have imagined. The kiss is soft and mellow, a beautiful emblem of your newfound, realised love. It is at that moment that you finally understand what it’s like to be sunkissed. 

When you two finally part you see that the sun has emerged from behind the dark clouds, casting its rays around you and Jeno in a warm embrace, but it’s still raining. The raindrops capture the sunlight during their descent, resembling little bits of spun gold fresh from the heavens. 

A sunshower.

You look at Jeno and smile. The sun and the rain can become one, after all. 

“You know, I used to be jealous of the rain that fell on your skin,” Jeno says, breaking the silence.

“Why?”

“It was closer to you than I’d ever been.” 

It’s a terrible, cheesy line, probably stolen from Tumblr, but you smile, taking his hand and lacing his fingers between yours. 

“Not anymore, my sun.”

a/n; aye its my first full-blown nct dream oneshot! hope you guys like it even though i cringed sooo hard when i was proofreading this and i legit regretted writing it lmao but i still wanted to put it out,,, feedback would be much appreciated :) also i haven’t forgotten about the jaemin fic i promised... like ages ago lmao i should really get down to it

[serenagaywaterford]

random thoughts:

jsyk, Serena swam in the place my dog poops. I hope Fred stepped in it. Die Fred.

(spoilers obvs)

NOT. ENOUGH. JANINE. the only time i cheered out the entire 3 episodes was that one glimpse of janine.

I got to see my girl Alma though which was lovely.

OMG. Can... I just... that scene with Emily walking through the hospital was the dumbest fucking, most American stupid scene ever on this show. It was so fucking cheesy and absolutely 10000% unrealistic. Who actually thought it was a good idea? They should be fired. Or sent to go work on Grey’s Anatomy or something. Not even that shitshow aka SVU would do something as painfully cliched and cheesy as that. Firstly, this show is fucking stupid. Okay. If all this shit was happening, Canada would have got like MILLIONS of refugees. Seeing the cops escort some raggedy refugee would be common af. Maybe it’s the baby thing? Still, Canadians aren’t gawkers like that. We also don’t like embarrassing displays like that. It’s so American it hurts.  NOBODY CLAPS LIKE THAT IN A FUCKING HOSPITAL. It’s a quiet place, okay. Also, why don’t any of these doctors have anything better to do? Anyway. I hated that scene so much.

Nick is so boring. So boring. He’s just a wet doughnut. I sorta liked him getting angry at June but also I wish I cared about anything he has to say. Bye Nick Bland. Good riddance.

Lawrence’s one liners? Funny. Lawrence? Disgusting awful psycho. I hate him sfm. 

Fred? Also disgusting. I hate him 10000x more. Everything about him is repulsive. He’s so much worse this season. I hate everything about his entitled, poor me, manpain. I hate hearing about any of his feelings. Fucking die already. I found him interesting enough as an antagonist in the show before but no longer. Redundant.

Beth. Too good for Nick. Too good for this world.

Too much staring. I AM SO SICK OF IT. It wastes time. Is redundant af at this point. I’m bored. Stop it.

Moss... um. Honey. I love you but... what the fuck was up with all the over-acting? 302 seemed particularly bad. Like I just can’t take it anymore. Who directed 302? They should be fired too for making her do that. Also, lady from Transparent, what the fuck was up with her acting?

Luke is useless. Like, I get it. I get why he’s a huge damp sulkbaby but I mean. I don’t want to see it? I’d rather just not see him at all cos literally I can’t recall a scene of him not being fucking useless or ignorant. Or half-assing it. I want to like Luke, honestly. But I just... don’t. I love the shit outta Moira and Erin, and I adored Moira/Emily interactions. But Luke? Miss me with his manpain.

Once again, I hate Lawrence. He is no good. He’s so fucking creepy and gross. I do not understand why people like him? And I don’t mean, “I don’t know why people like this character.” I mean, “I don’t understand why people like this person.” As a character, sure, he’s interesting and revolting and does his role well. He’s even got some funny lines and Whitford has great delivery. I mean these people who LIKE HIM. As a person. They think he’s great and a good guy. I don’t get it. Are we watching the same show? He’s a great character and a terrible person. That said, he’s still a dude and I’m not about to say he’s such a great character that I want to know all about him. Nah, bros. I wanna know all about Emily, Moira, Serena, Janine, Alma... and June I suppose but we already have quite enough of her. I don’t care about Lawrence’s backstory or emotional turmoil. I don’t need his perspective cos I’ve seen it before, I know it already. It’s in so many movies, books, and TV. So, he may be a well-written character but he’s not a fascinating one. If we wanna dig around in the psyches of bad people, Serena and Lydia are far more fascinating cos bad women’s stories are so much rarer to explore in any depth.

So, June got her feet lashed to shit again. And then she’s just walking around like no biggie next scene? Did the writers forget the first season when June couldn’t walk at all? All I’m asking is a bit of a limp?

June going straight to the house that just housed the handmaid that ran away with June’s baby seems... well, like complete bullshit. Never.

SERENA ISN’T WEARING HER WEDDING BAND. She’s done. She hates that man and I hate the fact everyone is pushing her to just get over it. Fred... is horrible in literally every single way. Every. Single. Way. (And sure Serena is horrible in some ways, but not nearly the same ways as Fred.) I just want Serena to be free of him. I want her and June to murder his ass. Graphically. That is the only violence I want to see on this show in the future. OMG, I can’t actually explain how much I hate him and I vomit in my mouth thinking about Serena having to get back with him. Even if I know she has to in order to survive. Ugh. 

UM. Okay, the “blood against the snow” bit was really interesting. I don’t recall Offred saying that in the book but Atwood brings it up often when talking about red. It was clever to include her own words, just like last season with the “men are afraid women will laugh at them...” bit.

But speaking of weird inclusions: Lawrence reciting book!Offred’s line about how easy is it to invent a humanity for anyone. It was curious they had Lawrence saying that to June, whereas it’s Offred in the book thinking that about the Commander.  “He was not a monster, to her. Probably he had some endearing trait: he whistled, offkey, in the shower, he had a yen for truffles, he called his dog Liebchen and made it sit up for little pieces of raw steak. How easy it is to invent a humanity, for anyone at all. What an available temptation.”

My wife, when Nick showed up in 303: “Oh, this prick again!” Just out of nowhere cos we don’t talk about fandom shit. She has no idea the extent of my sick obsession with this show. She doesn’t know how much I loathe Nick lol. She’s completely casual and even she can’t stand Nick. Which is so lovely. And then when he was yapping about going to the front, she just muttered, “Hopefully he’ll die there.”

OH MY GOD. I HATE MEN. That whole Commanders meeting scene made me want to throw up multiple times. It started with the words “shipment of females” and just got progressively worse with every passing second.

Except... LMAO. June: *sees Fred at a meeting* Fred: Hello. June: Hey you see Serena? How’s Serena? Is Serena okay? Serena’s tough. She’s great. She’ll be okay. I love her. *proceeds to do the world’s worst cringe-inducing seduction* I think on some level even Fred knows it’s bullshit.

I love comparing June’s seduction of Fred to her seduction of Serena. They’re very interesting contrasts. She’s so painfully fake with Fred. And only sort of insincere at times with Serena. 

Man, Sylvia is a dick lol. LOOK RICHMOND IS HARD ENOUGH TO GET ACROSS WITHOUT YOUR LIME GREEN CAR BLOCKING THE ONE MOVING LANE OF TRAFFIC!!!!!! Jokes aside... I actually really liked that scene of Emily finally calling her. That was touching and the closest I came to actually getting sniffly.  Actually no. Traffic on Richmond is no joke. I’m not kidding. That was a dick move, Sylvia. LOL.

June saying Nichole gets her politicianess thing from Serena absolutely fucking slayed me. I don’t even care if she was emotionally manipulating her af, it seemed genuine in parts of that convo. TWO MOMMIES. June used her flashback!June voice at one point. Honestly, these two actresses run this town.  You can tell how broken Serena is tho cos she’s oblivious to how manipulative June is being. She’s been aware in the past as soon as June does her whole “Say nice thing, bond over babies, ask for something” method and called her on it. It’s June’s only trick. It’s transparent af. And Serena knows it. Yet, she seems completely wooed now and not at all suspicious. So, when she gets her wits together again, I suspect Serena won’t be so malleable.

I’ve said a bunch of stuff about June/Serena stuff in my tag rants so I won’t repeat it. I just fell in love with it all.

PRAISE BE!!! We didn’t actually have to see a Nick/June sex scene. Behold His miracle! I was so relieved. And then... curiously they continued that love-theme-y music all the way over into Serena’s scene with June and that was not a coincidence.

I know people really like that Boomtown Rats song being the music to the fire... And it’s a jam. But... it’s about a real school shooting and I feel like that’s just a little... off? (Not to mention Tori Amos’ version is better, imo.) I mean, okay, I did some drama courses in university and I did a thing about that song so I researched it all and it just to me doesn’t fit at all. A 16-year-old girl shot up an elementary school. And somehow, call me crazy, but that’s completely inappropriate to use in this scene. I get female rage, etc etc. I get they didn’t want to go super obvious and use a song about burning houses. But considering how EXCELLENT a song they chose for 3x03 with that Roy Harper track you’d think they’d find something better for the bed/house burning. Not only that but the motive for Spencer was ... literally nothing. She didn’t like Mondays and thought it would be fun to kill a bunch of kids--which is the complete opposite of Serena’s motivations. It just devalues it.

I want more of Emily’s journey. This is the first time I’ve actually been interested in Emily tbh. And Clea Duvall is a treasure.

I want a Moira/Emily BROTP. Honestly Moira just seems like the best friend anybody could have?

WHY IS NICK A COMMANDER?! WTF????? Was I just not listening carefully enough? Is he? Cos I don’t really pay attention when he’s onscreen tbh and the wifey was like “Why’s this guy a commander now?” And I was like, “What do you mean he’s a commander?” Honestly, Nick is just like a piece of furniture. I barely notice him onscreen lol. Okay, this has nothing to do with my dislike of him. It honestly does not make any sense. We saw that other Commander only got promoted because his wife got pregnant. WHY THE FUCK WOULD THEY PROMOTE NICK? What on god’s green earth has he EVER fucking done well? Why the shitting hell would they promote a Guardian who, under his watch, has had one handmaid kill herself, another one escape/”get kidnapped”, wife cheat on him then get executed, allow a BABY to get kidnapped, the house get burned down????? All those things seem like Very Bad things and put all together seem like something that would put him on the Wall for being such a shitty employee rather than someone who deserves MORE responsibility. There’s literally no reason to make him a Commander. Just conscript him to the Chicago front. You don’t need a reason. He’s a grunt. Eye or not. I DO NOT GET IT. Fred gets demoted and Nick gets promoted? Nahhhhh mans. Not buying it.

So little Nick. I love it. I want zero Nick, but this’ll do. I’ll even put up with him being a Commander (LMAO) if it means he goes away for a while.

Lawrence calling out June’s terrible seduction technique (it is really bad), and calling Fred stupid = :} 

OK BACK TO THE BURNING WATERFORD HOUSE... i cannot abide how SLOW June is ALL. THE. FUCKING. TIME. Like, she shows up in Serena’s little pyromaniacal bedroom inferno and is like “COME ON!” and pulls her out of the room in what appears to be a hurry. Then as Serena and Rita are rushing out June just fucking stops and starts staring at all the smoke as if she’s on fucking shrooms. Then there she goes on her bullshit... Hey, bish, the house is literally burning down cos your crazy ass soulmate set fire to her own life and maybe you should leave. No? Not interested? Sure, stand there. Feel up the walls like I did once on MDMA. Makes total fucking sense. TAKE YOUR TIME WHY DON’T YOU? Why not? It just reminded me of 2x13 when Rita was saying “You gotta leave NOW!” and June just took it upon herself to carve a bunch of shit onto the wall for no goddamn reason.

OKAY. I WAS RIGHT. The other night when I was like, “I think I know that beach.” I do know that beach!!! My dog likes to take dumps right where Serena was. (I clean up after him, don’t worry.) I can point out that beach on a map if you want. There are also heroin needles and ticks in the bushes. There is literally a water treatment plant 200m away. I go swimming exactly where Serena was and once a dead fish floated by and I had to wrestle my dog away from it. I have been swimming there a lot. It’s nice in the summer. HOWEVER, poor Yvonne in her drysuit doing that in fucking November or whatever. This lake is fucking cold even in summer sometimes lmao. Like, I’ve spent so many hours right in that spot... cos well, I used to live right up the road so duh. Of course now that I don’t live there now and it was winter so why would I take my dog swimming, that they decide to film there. OF COURSE.

Speaking of filming, not that anyone cares, they were at the St Lawrence Market at one point. It was so obvious. Wasn’t really paying attention to any of the other locales tbh. If I watch again and pay attention I prolly could pick out a few more but honestly the only person that entertains is myself.

I still can’t believe Serena was being reborn on dogshit/dead fish beach. 

[ding-donghun]

Iced Americano

Donghun x Junhee

This is my first ever story on this blog. Considering I just wrote it a little over an hour before work I wanted to hurry and post it before I have to head out. So I apologize if there are any mistakes in the writing. I hope you enjoy reading this, it’s eh tbh but I did enjoy making it thank you~ Also I know nothing about coffee shops don’t come at me lol~

The month of February whether you're in a relationship or not you're drowned by nothing but love. Everywhere you go the sight of hearts, flowers, candy and couples haunt you. The ones who are in relationships are reeking havoc trying to figure out what to get their significant other. While the ones who are single are desperately trying to find that "special someone" to bright up their life or to just post selfies with on Instagram. 

Many do their best to cope with this month but the same does not go for Lee Donghun. Ever since he got the true grasp as to what Valentines Day really was he could never stand it. He never got why on this one day you should show appreciation to your most loved one, why couldn't you just do that cliche shit every other day? What made it all the worse is that he was born on this dreaded month, February 28th. God did he despise being born on the "month of love." Donghun was never one to fall in love or experience love at first sight. He's seen too many relationships fail to know that cringe induced dramas aren’t actually real, but who wouldn't. He was never interested in dating someone. He will never forget the time his friend told him that saving yourself for the special someone is useless, that the first relationship never really works out. Donghun couldn't believe those words when he heard it from his friend, what's that point of dating someone if you really never have plans to take it to marriage. That was Donghun's main belief. He wasn't going to date anyone if he never had plans to take it anywhere further than what it already was, it was useless to him, he never wanted to marry. Well that's what he thought until he met the "cute coffee boy."

February 14th: Why Donghun left the house on this dreadful day? He doesn't fully know either, all he did know what that he was craving a nice iced americano. The walk from his apartment to the cafe was not a long one, he always found himself coming back to this shop to get into his creative mindset. As he entered the door the little bells started to chime, he makes his way towards the counter laptop strapped to his side as he waits for the employee to come up front and take his order. It's usually a dark haired girl, Chungha. Donghun always thought Chungha to be very beautiful but never really did anything about it since she was gay and he was himself. He found out this information when he came into the shop during pride month to see her adorning a pride flag button, he smiled at her and asked her if she supported in which she replied, "It would only make sense that I did considering I'm gay myself." This took back Donghun considering he never really knew anyone at his age that was like himself unless you count his long time friend, Byeongkwan. That comment led the two to be great acquaintances when it came to Donghun getting his regular order. Donghun was smiling softly ready to greet Chungha until a new face came out from the back. Donghun's smile altered when he saw the black haired boy come up to the front with a smile to die for. "What are you not happy to see me? You were expecting Chungha right? She told me about you, the regular customer, Donghun is it?" The boy said a smirk adorning his lips. "Uh- yeah that's my name... speaking of Chungha where is she?" Donghun asked slightly shocked with how straight forward the boy was. "She's in the back working on things, so I came out instead." "You must be new then I've never seen you." The boy smiled brighter than before, "Of course silly, just started training but since I had another job at a different cafe I got the hang of this one pretty quick." In his life Donghun has never seen someone smile so bright and to affect him in such a way as to where he started to blush. Donghun caught himself staring at the boy so he tried to snap out of it quick but it was already too late considering the boy was watching his every move. "My name is Junhee but you can call me Jun." "Junhee..." Donghun whispered to himself liking the way it rolled off his tongue. "So Donghun what will it be?" Jun snapped Donghun out of his thoughts. "Oh, Uh- iced americano please." "Is that all Donghun?" Every time Jun said his name he felt like he was melting even more than before, this is a foreign feeling and Donghun isn't too sure how to take it. "Yes Jun." Donghun finally composed himself and smiled back at Jun causing the other to blush this time. "O-Okay that'll be $2.40." Jun says taking Donghun's money and giving him back the change. Donghun then went to his usual seat in the corner by the window he liked to see everything in the cafe but also see outside, the world usually gave him inspiration so he took any chance he could get to study it. It wasn't long before he heard his name being called, he got up from his seat to go get his drink. Thanking Jun he went back to sit down and type away while drinking his beverage. After writing for about an hour or so he decided that was enough for today especially since it was noon and that meant that all the couples would start flooding in soon. Just as he called it a couple came in giggling while holding each other close. Staring at them for a bit his eyes trailed to Jun who was also watching the couple with a warm smile on his face, all of a sudden Jun's eyes turned to look at Donghun, Jun continued to look Donghun in the eye until Donghun looked down. He then started to gather up his things, putting his laptop away into it's bag and grabbing his drink. Even though he was there for an hour he didn't fully finish his americano. He never does he likes to walk back home whilst taking small sips, he enjoys it better that way. When he gets up to leave he is bid a farewell by Jun. "Bye Donghun see you soon." Donghun waves back at Jun with a smile and as he's halfway out the door he can hear Jun call out, "Don't forget to look at your drink better!" Standing in front of the cafe Donghun is puzzled by what Jun meant, looking down at the coffee he sees that a number is scribbled onto the side. He then turns around to look back through the doors to see Jun wink and head into the back once again. Donghun runs his thumb over the messy writing, smiling to himself he takes out his phone and starts typing away, he sends Jun a small "Clever." Immediately he gets a reply of a smirk emoji from Jun. As Donghun walks home messaging Jun he looks up to see a couple snuggling on a park bench and instead of feeling disgust he smiles at them, wondering what it would be like for him and Jun to be snuggled on that bench now truly realizing the importance of love.

DiDi~

[sp4c3-0ddity]

took a while but i finally got to that thing that @cgf-kat tagged me in!! <3

What is your total posted word count on AO3? (Go to your Works, then click Statistics.)

I have...741,803 words posted on ao3 (although i don’t think this includes drafts?? if not then add maybe 10,000 to 15,000 or so words?? and maybe another 10,000 for fics that are confined to tumblr for the time being??)

How often do you write?

i try my best to write daily, mostly in the evenings, and lately i’ve been successful. sometimes (either if i’m in a low motivation slump) i’ll write more sporadically

Do you have a routine for writing?

HMM i usually have to get to a point in my day where i feel like i won’t be interrupted frequently...which is why i usually delay my writing till after evening prayer or after the rest of my family goes to bed, because then it’s quiet and peaceful and i’m not going to have my parents asking me to do something at random. otherwise i don’t think i have a proper routine?? tbh i rarely even go back and read the last thing i wrote, except sometimes when i last stopped in the middle of a scene

What’s your favorite kinks/tropes/pairing?

Tropes:  mutual pining, action/adventure (is that a trope or a genre??), friends to lovers, angst with a happy ending, hurt/comfort (with more comfort than hurt), slow burn (which tbh i can’t really write except as pseudo-slow burn where there are scattered scenes over a wide span of time), nonlinear plot/narrative (which is now funny to me because i recently learned my mother hates flashbacks in stories lol guess this means she’ll never read anything original i write ;_;)

Pairing:  plance, undoubtedly which is probably why i forgot to answer this and had to go back and edit the post after publishing it lol

Do you have a favorite fic of yours?

oh gosh i’m actually torn between a few different fics?? so i’m going to categorize them:

Tidal Lockdown wins for most recent favorite and even if i could’ve done better with prose i’m really happy with the pacing and plot (and it was born of my desperate need to write action at the time married to the Concept of Lance affectionately calling Pidge a nerd while ignorant of her past with bullying). and of course i need to thank @rueitae for inspiring the plot lol

Growth is one i can go back to and still be interested in rereading (is that weird to say about my own fic??) and it’s also an oddly good pick-me-up if i get sad about the prospect of non-canon plance which is silly but here we are

Falling’s Not the Problem is like...it has a lot of cliches but it was probably my first Serious Attempt at post-canon plance and i’m still proud of it, despite its faults

Your fic with the most kudos?

Strangeness and Charm, which i’m not sure counts since it’s a collection of many short fics, so let’s go with A Slip of the Thumb

Anything you don’t like about your writing?

HMM i think i do poorly with prose and the internal thought processes of the characters, but i also think i’m improving?? also...i’m awful at sustaining my interest in my own stories. often if i don’t finish something in a few days i’ll drop it, either because i got captivated by a Shiny New Idea or because i got bored with the “old” one

sometimes i also read my writing and cringe at how often i use certain turns of phrase, and how simplistic my vocabulary can be

Now something you do like?

i think i’m good at writing dialogue!! which is funny because i’m awful at talking irl can my ability to write decent dialogue please translate to a glib tongue and good conversation skills please?? every time i’ve been eloquent irl was an accident, i swear

also i’m very conscious of pacing a plot and certain reveals?? i adore slow reveals and hate narration/exposition/excessive description so i try my best to balance that sort of thing and prefer to spoon-feed things, plants seeds of foreshadowing, stuff like that...at least in theory

***

okay this took me longer than it should’ve but...now i tag @alwaysinsonder, @vivalachocolate, @amillionsmiles, @nadiarizavi, @mistyhollowpro, honestly @ any writers that see this and get interested (tag me back <33)

[angelsodreamy-no2]

girl i'm sorry but no.

-she isn't a hypocrite and fake. her whole "i'm not like other aphrodite childrens" thing was more into not dressing up, wearing makeup, and not following the beauty standards. not about love or jason, also she doesn't drool over him. AND WHAT DO YOU EXPECT IT'S HER BOYFRIEND. i don't see anyone complaining when hazel drools over frank? she ain't fake.

-her being an attention seeker makes sense, her father rarely makes time for her. she admits her mistakes and slowly realises that she doesn't need to do those things to receive attention from her dad, it's the character development that matters. also she legit like tries her best to not use her charmspeak anymore once she realises that she has that power unlike drew who uses it to control hee siblings.

-tomboy doesn't always mean wearing boy-ish colors because i have tomboy friends who even like to dress up sometimes. i admit that her shaming her siblings for dressing up is just rude and disrespectful, but she isn't fake for it. also rick literally wrote her character based on y/n cliches. regardless, there's nothing wrong with her braiding her hair and being tomboy. i know a friend who can literally braid her hair in less than a minute, it doesn't take that much time if you do it everyday. also she just simply disgaree on dressing uo bases on beauty standards, not dressing up in general. she was never really that tomboy which is why it's said she's a "laid-back tomboy", it just indicates that she acts tomboy and isn't consideres feminime for a regular child of aphrodite. the point of her character is to destroy stereotypes of children of aphrodite only caring about their looks and such since in pjo percy only says that aphrodite kids just gossip and dress up most of the time. although i despise rick's thoughts on making being feminime as a weak trait and how he wrote piper, her character still showed the point that children of aphrodite aren't "weak" and can do other things instead of gossiping and dressing up, but it doesn't mean that doing those stuff are bad as well.

-okay point no 2 is just false. she isn't selfish and is literally the opposite of it. because if you think that piper is selfish, then you'd think that percy's selfish as well. there is nothing wrong with wanting to keep your partner safe. also why are you complaining about piper killing medea when percy chocked a goddess with her own poison and how almost everyone else have killed others as well? piper had to kill medea or else jason and leo would be stuck there and kill each other. also the whole thing with reyna is wrong. i actually started liking piper from there. when she noticed that reyna had feelings for jason she was a bit worried at first, but then later on being the daughter of the goddes of love, she understood it. she acknowledges reyna's feelings and starts to feel sympathy for her and never became jealous of her. they never had a fight, they even became close friends by the end of blood of olympus. reyna trusted piper to the point where she even asked advise about love from her.

-the next one about greeks and romans going into war was just a thought. when you read it through someone's pov then they'll usually describe their thoughts to the readers. it's just how she felt, what she thought at the moment, she soon erased that feeling anyway.

-ooh so a girl being bold is wrong? many guys do that and i don't see people complaining but if its piper than it's wrong? she just told drew to back off, although tbh i did find that scene a bit weird/cringe.

-idk much about cherokee culture so if someone wants to educate me then please do so, but i thought she loves her culture? like idk she made into her personality. she knows stories and legends about ir, but i did heard that the cornucopia thing is disrespectful tho, i think it was just more to rick's fault than piper.

-the annabeth one? yes. it was in that scene where in order to go somehere they needed to open up their feelings. they nearly gave up when they couldn't find the entrance to it so they took a break and they sat. annabeth told her about her experience in tartarus and she legit told her feelings to piper who "toughened" her up. then in the cave/temple/underground place when they had to follow intuition to escape and such, annabeth was confused and piper helped her guide through it. ever since then annabegh started to follow her intuition instead of just using her logic and their bond became stronger.

-the festus one was with charmspeak, idk why you're pressed about it. even i forgot about that one, the one i found impressive was how she was able to bring back jason alive with her charmspeak. as for the khione one, idk they spent months there in the ship. she also spent like at months at camp first learning the basics. demigods learn pretty fast so i think it makes sense. hazel just helpes her improve. as for the percy one, percy legit only spent like a couple days at camp before going on that quest. he only learned sword fighting for a couple of days, he's the one who's unrealistic. he has talent tho so it makes sense, but for you to compare them is just wrong. piper learned how to use the dagger for months while percy only learned how to use thw sword for a couple of days before he fought ares.

i understand who you might dislike piper, but please just hate rick for the way he wrote her instead of bashing over piper.

reasons why piper gets hated on :

(warning all of these are incredibly stupid)

“for being too feminine” : first of all for a daughter of aphrodite she’s definitely considered not too feminine. second, she’s a girl, a regular teenage girl, what do you expect. third, i seriously do not remember her being feminine at all, she legit doesn’t like dressing up and can protect herself.

“for giving off ‘i’m not like other girls’ vibe” : so...? she changed as well in the end. her ‘i’m not like other girls’ phase was only in the first book as well.

“for talking too much about jason” : is there a problem with it? annabeth talks a lot about percy, percy talks a lot about annabeth as well, and i don’t see anyone complaining about them. he’s her boyfriend so of course she talks about him a lot. jason also had the most injuries/ most often got injured out of all of them which was why she was worried. piper’s povs are one of my favourites and i seriously don’t remember her talking that much about jason anyways.

“for thinking that jason is better than percy” : for the last time, they’re equal. i like to see the both of them as complete opposites of each other instead, like jason’s a son of zeus with a golden retriever’s personality while percy’s a son of poseidon with a doberman’s personality. like jason’s the chill dude who was raised by wolves and was forced into leadership ever since he was really young meaning he definitely has more experience with leadership, sword training, and regular missions in general. while percy on the other hand is definitely less experienced and has had less training, despite that he has more bizarre experiences and is still equally skilled in sword fighting as well. LIKE THEY LEGIT HAD A FIGHT, ONE ON ONE, AND IF PIPER DIDN’T STOP THEM THEN THEY WOULD’VE BOTH DIED BECAUSE THEY ARE ON THE SAME LEVEL. i feel like the difference between the two of them is just that jason’s fighting style is extremely predictable since he’s taught the same way to fight as like hundreds of other roman demigods while percy’s fighting style each time is different depending on his opponent and insane plan.

“she moved on too fast” : well to be fair, their relationship was already on the verge of falling apart before she called it quits. their relationship was literally set up by aphrodite and hera which made her uncomfortable, and i think it’s understandable. like the two goddesses really just put two hot people together, made one of them fall in love first until the other eventually fell in love as well. their relationship was literally built based off their looks, at least for jason since to him it was just love at first sight. meanwhile piper fell in love with an ‘idea or imagination’ of him. anyways the point is that in my opinion, she did not. she just wanted to leave that relationship as soon as possible and just luckily managed to find someone. to be fair, piper is described as super hot tho so i feel like it’s impossible for her to remain single for a long time lol.

“she’s useless” : without her jason would’ve been dead by book one, percy (and jason, again) would’ve died by drowning in poison, leo ( and percy and jason) would also still be possessed by some ghost (idk what their called, i forgot), annabeth might’ve died as well being crushed underground, and she’s literally everyone’s therapist in the ship. she’s the peacemaker, the one who ends conflicts between the 7 of them. she can also save herself and can manipulate anyone by just sweet talking.

[joannalannister]

Samyria submitted:

Hey :) I don´t know if I´m asking the right person (and also it is kind of an old case) but what are your thoughts about Jon being a Targaryen?

I  personally don´t like it because it feels forced, obvious (to be honest: I´m not a fan of the Targaryen family - Daenerys included) and way too much like some kind of fanfiction where the Mary-Sue (aka Dany) finally finds her Gary-Stu (aka Jon). I mean…two families equipped with random super powers (in contrast to ALL the other families) and now there is this perfect link between them? That is a bit too much for my taste… Still I would love to hear your opinion. :D

Hi! I’m not exactly sure what you’re asking. 

Are you asking me whether I think Jon Snow is Rhaegar and Lyanna’s son? Because yeah, I believe that, I don’t think “R Plus L Equals J” is too obvious. The fact that so many people figure it out while reading doesn’t make it obvious or forced imo, it just makes me believe that GRRM builds a good foundation when he’s constructing his story, so that when Jon does find out about his true parentage in the books, it will feel very organic and a natural part of the story. I don’t think I have any original thoughts on this theory, but if you’d like to read about it in depth, I recommend the #R plus L equals J tag on @nobodysuspectsthebutterfly‘s blog. 

Or are you asking me whether I believe that Rhaegar and Lyanna got married in the books, making Jon their trueborn son rather than a bastard? 

I don’t believe the theory that Rhaegar and Lyanna got married in the books, because I don’t think Jon Snow’s bastardy is something that’s going to be “solved” so neatly. I don’t think illegitimacy is something to be “solved” at all tbh. The R+L=J reveal is going to be quite tumultuous for Jon, something that will shake him to his core imo, and I think a lot of Jon’s narrative is going to be dedicated to his emotional journey of coming to terms with the idea that he wasn’t Ned Stark’s bastard at all, but Rhaegar’s bastard, and that the woman Jon thought was his aunt is really his mother, and sure, I believe that Lyanna went willingly with Rhaegar, but I don’t think she stayed willingly at the end, because I think this medieval idea of “consent once given is given forever” is bullshit and I think (hope) that GRRM is ripping that idea to shreds, like he does with that idea in Cersei’s narrative. 

That tv show doesn’t have time for emotional journeys, hence the R/L marriage and the complete lack of a nuanced depiction of Rhaegar and Lyanna’s relationship. 

Like, the way that I see Jon’s narrative isn’t that his bastardy is a problem, it’s that he needs to come to terms with it emotionally. And imo Jon has come to terms with the idea that he’s Ned Stark’s bastard in ADWD, cuz Ned was good and honorable and everyone in the North affords Ned a certain respect that sort of counterbalances the stigma in Westeros that bastards are treacherous and awful. So he’s halfway toward accepting who he is. But how much is it going to shake him when he finds out he’s actually Rhaegar Targaryen’s bastard? we can debate Rhaegar’s character until we’re blue in the face, I’m not gonna do that here. Set Rhaegar aside for a moment. The Targaryens murdered Jon’s grandfather and Jon’s uncle. The Targs really fucked up House Stark. 

So when I talk about one of ASOIAF’s themes of the body as a battleground, GRRM is really gonna bring it home in Jon Snow, because he has to deal with such great internal conflict, Stark vs Targaryen, and how can Jon come to terms with what Rhaegar did, and how does that affect Jon’s decisions moving forward. 

Not to mention the whole “I don’t think Jon’s ever going to be fully 100% alive ever again cuz he’ll be a fire zombie” thing complicating this whole situation. 

So yeah, anyways, I think Jon Snow is staying a bastard throughout the series. (Although Robb may have tried to legitimize him, idk wtf is going on with that, idk if that counts, and frankly I don’t give a damn so *shrug emoji*.) 

Is it forced or obvious? I don’t think GRRM’s going to make it feel that way. 

Also, I think the point of Dany’s story is that she is the Targ claimant to the Throne, not Jon, but she gives it all up anyway to save the world. It’s a lot bigger and more meaningful sacrifice on her part if Jon remains a bastard.

In terms of a Mary Sue / Gary Sue … I don’t think I believe in those concepts tbh? Mary Sue is a term loaded with a lot of sexism and misogyny, and Gary Stu is derived from it, instead of the other way around as is typical, because people mostly use the “Mary Sue” concept to criticize female characters for being “too competent” / “too beautiful” / “too admirable” etc. We’ve seen numerous examples of Dany and Jon failing, so what exactly is too competent? What is too beautiful? What makes someone too admirable? 

I don’t believe in the concept of a Mary Sue. I believe in good stories. 

And I think GRRM is more than capable of making Jon and Dany into a damn good story: a compelling, emotionally-satisfying, well-written story with very flawed, very human characters. I think everything from AGOT to ADWD is proof of that. I would literally have to quote the whole book here. 

So, I think the opening argument falls to you here. I’m not gonna do it for you. You would need to make the argument that Jon and/or Dany is a Mary Sue in the books with specific textual examples of how you feel they fit the definition of a Mary Sue if you want me to rebut that idea. 

Regarding the idea that the Starks and the Targaryens have super powers while the other families don’t … idk what to tell you. ASOIAF is an epic fantasy series; people who do magical stuff is par for the course. If the fantasy genre isn’t your thing, idk what to say. 

But what do the Starks have in terms of super powers? Bran has magical powers, Arya can commune with wolves, and Jon is … possibly vacationing in Ghost until a woman from Essos resurrects him. Sansa and Rickon don’t seem to have any magic, or at least nothing that’s manifested itself. (Nor did it seem like Robb did.) 

idk, this doesn’t bother me. The Starks are the heroes. I want to see them do fantastic things, as much as I want to see Wonder Woman go up and over the top. It doesn’t bother me that magical powers aren’t distributed equally among Westerosi society because these powers are supposed to be special. They’re not ordinary. The magic isn’t a mundane part of everyone’s life. The people who use it are not ordinary. Someone like Arya is … exceptional. There could be a hundred Lancels, or a thousand Randylls, but there’s only one person like Arya. Only one person like Bran. Only one Jon. Because I think we’re supposed to realize that being the hero is hard. Stepping up and being the true knight in a world as dark and twisted as Westeros is something very out of the ordinary, something very rare. And the cool thing is that they would do this true knighthood thing even without the magical powers; the magical powers are just author signposts to say, “pay attention to this person” and painting it so much larger than life.  

And idk if the Targaryens really have super powers? Dany has dragons. She has magical creatures, but does she have powers? A miracle happened to her, where she survived Drogo’s pyre, but she’s not fireproof, nor are any other Targs. idk, I read fantasy because I want the miracles, so again idk what to tell you. 

Why does it bother you that the Starks have direwolves and Dany has dragons? 

(If it makes you feel any better, I like to imagine that the prehistoric lions in the Westerlands (basically direlions) – I like to imagine that after the Clegane kennelmaster killed the lioness, Tytos found two cubs and they took them home and he gave them to his kids as pets, but cats being cats, the lion cubs just caused a bunch of problems like knocking down expensive shit and gnawing on people and stuff, until Tytos was like, OK we gotta lock em up, and that’s why they were tame and why they didn’t bite Cersei’s hand off many years later.) 

For me, it always felt like Tyrion has his own superpower: “My mind is my weapon,” and this is why GRRM wrote Tyrion as he did, making him a dwarf to give him a head disproportionately bigger than his body, like he’s someone from a comic book. 

And iif you’re asking me about Jon being in a relationship with Dany, but it being incestuous … eh, it’s fantasy, it’s not real. The incest just adds to the heightened emotions, like some Greek Drama or s/t. If we were reading about the Greek gods on Olympus or s/t with all their incest, would everyone cringe so much? 

Truly, I’m a lot more bothered by all the 13 year old girls being forced to get married in ASOIAF, and the way GRRM writes about how a woman’s “childlike smile” and “girlish body” is “so sexy”. <.<

For Jon/Dany … as I’ve said before, I think ASOIAF is about love, and I think it’s about loving even in the Lovecraftian landscape of the Others, about finding and reveling in our humanity even when it’s under siege in a twisted world of cold and ice. Some people think that’s corny or cheesy or cliche. I think it’s beautiful. If you don’t like it, tho, then you don’t like it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Finally, if you were asking me about Jon/Dany on the show, I’m sorry but I don’t like that show, so the question of whether Jon/Dany are forced or obvious on the show is irrelevant to me. 

[ayearofromcoms]

#53: Man Up (2015)

IMDB plot summary: A single woman takes the place of a stranger's blind date, which leads to her finding the perfect boyfriend.

Is this an accurate plot summary? I guess. I do like how the movie poster is doing the work of trying to explain what this movie is about because the title is so vague and terrible.

Well, hey, guys! Long time, no talk about romcoms. What have you been up to since our year of romcoms ended? As for me, I’ve been busy a) having a child and b) publishing a book. Which all means that my romcom consumption has gone WAY down...like, do you know that babies have VERY little interest in meet cutes? It’s true! Anyway, the other night my husband and I actually had the chance to watch a movie together, so I took the opportunity to romcom it up. And since everyone loves Simon Pegg and Lake Bell, I chose this one. Several people recommended it to me, it was in the library’s Blu-Ray selection, it was fate.

Let’s get to the plot: Lake Bell, now British, thinks she’s a loser, I guess because she doesn’t have a boyfriend. What she does have is a lovely sister played by Sharon Horgan. Can you imagine if Sharon Horgan was your sister? You would have access to great clothes constantly.

Lake Bell, single and not loving it, is headed home for her parents’ anniversary party, for which she had to write a speech. Don’t worry, she wrote it in a notebook she carries around everywhere that definitely WON’T get lost or become a central plot point.

While she’s on the train home, she runs into a girl who’s reading some popular self-help book. Lake Bell, too cool to care about anything, makes fun of it. When the train stops, she realizes the girl left the book for her. Instead of trashing it, she tries to chase down the girl in the train station to return her book. That’s how she comes to be standing by herself under a giant clock, forlornly holding the book, when Simon Pegg shows up. Because guess what, you guys? He’s supposed to be meeting a blind date there, and they’re both supposed to be holding copies of that book. And instead of being like, “Nope, not me!” Lake Bell is all, “Yes, I AM your blind date.”

And who can blame her? Simon Pegg is cute! He’s wearing a scarf! He’s got that haircut every man I know got when he turned 30 (no shade; it’s a nice haircut) and he’s very friendly. So she’s on this date with him, pretending to be a girl named Jessica, and you know where this is going. She’s gonna be outed and he’s not gonna be able to trust her but they’re gonna have chemistry, right?

I mean, yeah, pretty much. Can we talk about the specific moment in which she’s outed as a big faker, though? So she and Simon Pegg are at a bowling alley, taking part in a romcom montage that shows how much fun they’re having, when Lake Bell runs into a guy she knows from high school. He knows she’s not named (sorry, “called,” this movie is British) Jessica, and he’s had a crush on her for years. So he attempts to blackmail her into sexual favors to keep him from telling Simon Pegg her true identity! Which is...extremely gross! He was so creepy that I cringed every time he was on screen, yet he was also kind of the “wacky side character” so it was a real conflict. On the one hand, this guy is threatening a woman. And on the other hand...well, actually that one hand’s got plenty of creepy stuff in it. It was gross, is what I’m saying.

Once they have their inevitable parting of ways and Lake Bell shows up super late to her parents’ anniversary party (seriously, girl, they’re your PARENTS), she’s crushed. And Simon Pegg realizes that Lake Bell is the girl he’s supposed to be with, and also he realizes he has her notebook from the beginning. You know, the one with the speech in it that she needs for the party. So of course he has to find her, and of course it involves a high-speed race through the city.

Here’s what I liked about Man Up: it actually cast a good actress who’s known for comedy. I like Lake Bell a lot and she’s super talented. Also, Simon Pegg is very cute and I would watch him in more romcoms, including the ones I write in my head when I’m daydreaming. There were parts that were genuinely funny, and several scenes that made us laugh out loud (mostly involving that creepy dude, who was very good at acting creepy). And TBH I would watch anything that lets me stare at Sharon Horgan for a few minutes.

Here’s what I didn’t like about Man Up: it’s hard to explain, but there just wasn’t enough build up to their feelings about each other. It didn’t feel 100% earned when Simon Pegg was running down the street trying to find Lake Bell. ALSO I resent that the movie expects me to believe Lake Bell looks bad just because her hair is kind of messed up. In one scene, she goes into the bar bathroom, puts on the tiniest amount of makeup and changes her shirt, and when she comes out Simon Pegg is like, “Whoa, who’s THIS girl?” Like...she looked like Lake Bell before, she looks like Lake Bell now. This isn’t new information.

What it boils down to is that I liked this movie enough to wish that it was just a tiny bit better.

I still found this to be a really charming and likable movie, and I get why so many people recommended it to me. Both of the leads were wonderful, the side characters were great (and occasionally creepy) and Sharon Horgan was there. All in all, a solid romcom...nice and cozy and pretty comforting.

Stray thoughts:

-I hate googling actors while I’m watching a movie, but I couldn’t figure out who Simon Pegg’s ex-wife was and it was driving me so crazy that I had to look it up. And she was ROSEMARY FROM RUSHMORE. A blunt bob can really change your look.

-There’s a scene built around Duran Duran’s The Reflex and I guess I never realized what a killer song it is. We should all be so lucky to have a climactic fight with Simon Pegg during it.

-Okay, you guys, this was the creepy dude:

He must be a great actor because he was SELLING IT.

-Just to confirm, both Simon Pegg and Lake Bell were super adorable in this film. Look at all their layered clothing!

Romantic comedy cliches: blind date, mistaken identities, running through the streets to find someone, a missing item that must be returned, a single person who keeps getting set up by their friends, a falling-in-love montage, an evil ex

Is this a good movie? I think it is.

Did I like this movie? Yes! I would recommend it when you’re, oh, I don’t know, overwhelmed by the news and just want to watch nice people meet each other. If that’s a mood you’re ever in.

Did this movie make me believe in love? It made me believe that I have developed a crush on Simon Pegg.

That’s it for now! I enjoyed watching a romcom so much after all this time that I think I might pop back in occasionally.  What can I say? Romcoms and I are like a couple in a romcom: we might be pushed apart by plot constraints, but we’ll always find our way back to each other. I deeply enjoy talking about romcoms and sharing recommendations with the people who read this blog, and it’s nice to have something that’s purely fun.

And before I go, just a reminder that my first book is out now! It’s called LOVE AND OTHER ALIEN EXPERIENCES and I tried to cram as many romcom elements as possible into it. It’s been called a YA The Shop Around the Corner, and you know what? I’ll take it! If you like this blog, chances are pretty good that you’ll like the book, because, you know...I wrote both of them.

PROMO OVER. I’ll check back in next time I get the chance to see a romcom. I just got The DUFF from the library and I have a feeling I’ll have a lot to say. No one better mess with Mae Whitman.

As always, send your recs and thoughts to me on Twitter @KerryAnn or via email at welcometoladyville@gmail.com.

[jinwoostro-archive]

(1) heya lanna!!!! slipping in today without a jinjin scenario aye (lmao i just finished typing and i lied there’s one at the end of these series of questions) and you don’t have to answer this series of asks at all but aye i ?? think ?? you’re having a hard time right now and i know it’s very cliche to say this but it will ??? get better??? i don’t usually talk about this so this is going to be a little choppy but ah fun fact basically

RIP LMAOOOOO i don’t remember which part i sent that was 2 but eyh i typed it out on a doc so here’s what i think it was: (2.1) fun fact basically i had to go on meds about 5 years ago bc of more or less (what i think are) the same things you’re feeling rn and ye it was ?? not a fun time there was a lot of helplessness and apathy and physical pain and Not Enough Energy or Motivation to Survive and i was forced into getting help and ?? i don’t know what your family situation is like or(3) i’m not saying i know what you’re going through or that i know it’ll help you but it’s def an option that worked for me and it’s something that might work for you too ;;;;but i’m going to say that i’m rly glad i stuck through the worst of everything because now literally everything is brighter (esp after our sons debuted i’m rly rly rly glad i stuck around in this world long enough to meet them and see them shine) and because now i know a lot more things about the world and myself that(4) i wasn’t so much aware of before so here goes this is what i learnt and this is me being sappy as fuckyou’re important. you probs watch doctor who lmao ur in the uk but do u remember that one episode when eleven went “i’ve never met anyone who wasn’t important before”?? you’re so so so important and i know a lot of people think someone’s importance is based on how much they do for other people?? but it’s literally not true???? sometimes existing and being there that’s(5) enough that’s you being important because fun fact you’re irreplaceable!! you’re not important because you send nice messages or whatever you’re important because of the reason you do those things you’re important because you’re you and selfless and kind and so so so beautiful inside and out you’re important because you came into people’s lives and started existing and ?? that’s irreplaceable there’s a Lanna-shaped hole in everyone’s lives and the people lucky enough to get(6) the hole filled???????? goddam because you as a person mean so so much to me (even with your terrible memes smdh lanna i will never forgive u for baldstro) and if it so happens that you’re also lighting their lives up by existing because of the beautiful person u are???? a double deal tbh but listen you are so so so important because you’re you and nobody else can replace you ever not a bot not another person conclusion: i love you and you’re important to me and the other people you’ve(7) you’ve met on this godforsaken site and also i lost my train of thought but also consider this - jinjin sitting with you in a cafe, holding your hand and sipping iced coffee. he has his gold glasses on with his green hoodie (only because you stole his white one smh lanna why) and when he moves in the light you can see them flash slightly in the light. his hair is pushed away from his forehead so he can see better but sometimes a couple strands fall over his eye and you brush them away so(8) /you/ can see him better. and his eyes are soft and warm and the colour of chocolate and caramel and you wish you could somehow capture him like this, with the afternoon light in his hair and him looking at you with adoration and your hand in his. and he’s brushing his thumb over the back of your hand and looking at you with his head tilted to the side, almost as if trying to memorise you, when he suddenly says, earnestly, “what music do mummies like to listen to?”(9) WRAP MUSIC LMAOOOOOOOO I’LL SHOW MYSELF OUT -boyfriend!jinjin anon anyways i hope you have a good day :')

wow,,,i mean holy fuck that was a lot and idk if it’s because it’s nearly 4am or im kinda highstrung rn but askdn im a mess and idk im just crying.Unfortunately, my parents don’t believe i have any mental illnesses or that it is possible for me to get it so i don’t think it would be possible for me to get help :((But i’ll stick through it! I have really good friends and im grateful for all they’re doing and even if theyre not aware of it they’re helping me alot.okay this is dumb but when you mentioned that doctor who quote i just cried even harder because i know exactly which episode you’re talking about because that episode hit me really hard. rip he’s said a lot of quotes that have stuck with me all these years and it’s helped a bit too..tbh i didn’t really see an importance in myself like,, i found no reason why i should be here or why anyone needs me or anything like that. but, really, thank you so freaking much. bit cringe but this was kind of a realisation that i do matter in some way? rip it doesn’t sound real but fuckin hell it really just hit me then. i really fucking wish there was some way to show you how much i appreciate this and how much it means to me but,,,idk,,im kinda just shaken rn.ahem nYWAYS onto the jinjin part,,,holy freakin hell I can picture that so clearly in my head.tbh i would always steal his clothes bc they’re oversized nd i bet theyre the softest thing :’))) (just like him)honestly,  u write this too well, it makes me feel so many things :’)) (im highkey missing his longer hair now bc i wanna touch it now rip)istg,,,if he did that joke on me,,,i would stare at him for a minute adn then grab his face and tell him how cute and adorable he is while squishing his cheeks,,bc im freakin whipped for this boy

[itshyejung]

She Loves Me, She Loves Me Not - Chen Linong

Type: Scenario

(Not gonna do genres bc tbh idk how to categorize my scenarios? I guess they’re fluff I mean they’re not rly angsty and def not smut so... just cute? Who even knows lmao)

Characters: Nine Percent Chen Linong x you

(Pics are edited by me so pls give credit. Scenarios are not requested, I came up with all these a long time ago but never really shared them publicly, so hope you guys enjoy! I tried to be creative with each scenario and not do super cliche or boring ones but I think all of them are still kinda cliche lmao...)

The florist’s had never been so busy before, but here you were hauling in boxes and boxes of flower orders your aunt had just placed to keep the stocks up in the shop. There was a large truck in the back parking lot that was filled with many floral arrangements. How many did your aunt even order? Too many to count. There was barely any room left at the display windows, so you had no choice but to push them towards the counter, where they almost crowded the cash register. You would have to deal with them later, there were more out back.

You thanked the delivery man, signed your name on his clipboard, and stood looking disbelief at the ros of pots and plants that were lined at your feet as he drove away. Where were you doing to find the time and spot to put them? With a sigh, you picked up the first pot of orchids and tugged it inside, searching carefully. At least the shop hadn’t opened yet, so you still had some time. However, you had to hurry. Any passerby might see the row of flowers outside an empty parking lot and think it was weird. You checked your watch: 45 minutes until opening hours to move 60 pots of flowers. You were in trouble.

Feeling like an idiot, you ran up the stairs to your ream and began fixing the flower pots all over the floor of your room. Besides, if you ran out of one kind of flower, you’d just have to run right up there and bring one down, pretending it was the second stock room. Right? No one would know. Except maybe your aunt, who was on maternity leave due to her pregnancy, might have a fit when she comes to visit, yelling about how the flowers don’t have proper sunlight and water supply. Speaking of, the ones downstairs probably don’t either. Oops.

You fished around the real storage room for the watering can and took it to the sink, impatiently waiting for it to fill up with water. You had ten minutes lefto before opening time. Hurriedly, you dragged the watering can over to the row of flowers spread in a row under grow lights, lightly sprinkling water over the delicate petals. Why was such a small watering can so heavy?

You stepped back to admire how fast you’d gotten it all done. Then you cringed. Hopefully you hadn’t drowned the flowers. They looked fine; presentable at least. As a florist’s assistant, that was good enough for you. Your aunt could check on it later.

It was a weekend and you had to managed the store, as the only other employee your aunt had hired so far worked on the weekdays when you had school. If this was going to be your potential job, the least you could do was work weekends while your aunt was on maternity leave.

You flipped the closed sign over to open and ran upstairs quickly to bring two more flower pots down, just for presentation. Although there was practically no room on your counter, you managed to squish them both on there without knocking over any of them. You heard the bell ring in front of the store as someone pushed open the door hurriedly.

“Yes hello, welcome to-“ You stopped short in your tracks when you realized just who had stepped foot in your store: one of your favorite regular customers, Chen Linong. He also served as your current secret crush. Your heart bloomed like the flowers in the shop whenever you saw him, and you definitely felt lighter around his presence. There was something about him that distinguished him from other guys that girls usually had a crush on: although he seemed shy, he didn’t care about things like people seeing a teenage boy hanging around in a florist’s shop. No one called him a loser for it either, because they knew a guy like him had his reasons.

“H-hi,” Linong blurted, turning an alarming shade of red in the face. Was he sick? Was it hot in here? Come to think of it…

Maybe the fact that a teenage boy coming to the flower shop was starting to eat at him. But you didn’t mind. You could stare at him admiring your floral arrangements all day, and every day you tried to perfect the arrangements to his liking. “Um, do you need any help finding a specific type of flower?”

“No thanks, I’m fine.” He smiled straight at you… wait, it wasn’t like there was someone else in the room anyway.

“Oh, um, feel free to look around!” You cringed. What were you saying? Didn’t he already say he was fine? Why did you keep bothering him?

“Yeah I will, thank you,” he said and knelt down so that his eye level was parallel to that of a pot of sunflowers. He was so close that his nose was almost buried in the petals. You thought it was a funny image and almost burst out laughing, but then you remembered that you hated your laugh, and besides, you’d rather not disturb the silence in the shop right now. 

Just you and Linong… this was the way it should be.

_______________________________________________________________________

The florist’s was one heck of a busy place. Were there really that many people who wanted to buy flowers? All the times you had read about florists in books, they’d always had a quiet, tranquil attitude, not some busy, rushed attitude. Plus, the literal flower boys who worked there were always described so prettily and cutesy and here you were… scared you were going to knock over one of the pots on your counter.

“Ma’am, can I get a pot of lilies, please?”

“I still haven’t gotten my order of a six set amaryllis and astible mix.”

“Do you have any sunflower arrangements left?” Linong grinned crookedly at you and jokingly hid the sunflower pot he was admiring earlier behind his body secretly. 

“Yes, I’ll be right there…” you called, barely hearing your own voice. What was it, roses, orchids, sunflowers? Or daffodils, carnations, sunflowers? All you remembered were the sunflowers hidden behind Linong’s body, and you hurried to get them. He had on a yellow sweater today, the same color as the sunflowers, and he sighed like he had been caught red-handed with his masterful camoflauge plan. But he smiled to let you know he was still joking. You rolled your eyes and dragged the damn heavy thing back to the counter, where the first two customers in line stood patiently waiting for their… delphiniums and irises. Sweat peas and lilac.

“Lilies, amaryllis, and astible!” you muttered a little too loudly to yourself, the sound of you snapping your fingers echoing off the walls of the small, cramped shop. You looked around at all the faces staring at you. “I-I’m sorry, I’ll be right back.”

You ran upstairs, oblivious to the fact that Linong was watching you trip over the stairs towards your room in the shop. In fact, there were many things Linong knew that you were oblivious to. There was the fact that he knew you lived up there, on the second floor of the building in which the florist’s shop lay at the bottom of. He also knew that every night, after you closed the shop, you would open the balcony doors to your room, sometimes blasting your music while you did your homework, which the neighborhood never minded of. You’d then water your hanging plants delicately before closing the doors again. Sometimes he rode his bike here, and as he was wheeling away, he would see your figure in the dim light of your room. He knew you lived independently, as you had been given the spare room on top of the florist’s ever since you started working there by your aunt. He knew all these things about your life and yet he still didn’t know how to talk to you.

You appeared at the bottom of the stairs again, dragging the designated flower pots with you and handing them to the right customers. linong sighed, waiting patiently as he rocked back and forth on his small heels, curling his feet along the insides of the rubber soles as he stalled for time. He couldn’t wait to get started with the new project he had planned in mind, and he really needed your help. But it seemed like you were too busy to notice him standing there. A bit dejected, he turned back to the flowers, now remembering you had snatched his sunflowers away. He chuckled to himself and began to browse along the rows, selecting a new flower in his mind.

The sound of a ringing bell and the clicking of cashier keys rang throughout the shop all day. Linong was getting tired of waiting. He stood up and suddenly saw a spare apron hanging off a crooken nail in the wall. He scrambled up to get it and tied it on himself. You looked at him incredulously. What was he getting himself into?

“Let me help you,” he said, sliding into a spot at the counter next to you. You smiled so big you were afraid your teeth would fall out right there in front of him.

“U-um… you don’t have to! I can manage by myself!” You gently pushed him out of the way and busied yourself with rummaging through the coin box to find change for the customer at the front of the line. 

“Are you sure about that?” HIs eyes looked so sincere you almost felt bad about lying to him about how tired you were. BUt it wasn’t right to complain to a customer like him about your job. Besides, you’d picked this job because you genuinely loved flowers, and you especially loved your aunt, the professional florist who had given you this job in her very own florist business. She was even nice enough to let you have the small room upstairs. You couldn’t let her down, but… “I’ve been watching you all day, and I’m pretty sure you would love some help, wouldn’t you?”

You blushed madly, unable to believe he’d make you feel this way. “A-ah… whatever you say,” you said hastily, pushing a few flower pots aside. However, you forgot for a second how crowded the counter had been and you knocked one over the edge. Linong was quick to retrieve it, wiping his brow. “That was close, wasn’t it? Now aren’t you glad I came to your rescue?”

You blushed even more. “Sure.”

“Hey, it’s really sweet that you two lovebirds are chitchatting over there, but I need my order urgently, miss!” a lady in a long white trencth coat called from the middle of the line. You and Linong both scrambled a good distance away from each other and began to take care of customers’ needs and wants from opposite sides of the counter. Occasionally, you’d both turn heads to look at each other for a split second, then quickly look away.

When you finally turned over the “Open” sign hanging on the inside of the door, Linong was collapsed on the counter. Luckily, most of the flowers had cleaned away, so his tall frame had a lot of space to lean on. “Wow, I don’t know how you go through this every day. I-I mean the job is nice, it’s just… for a high school student like you, isn’t it a bit, um, too much?” he suddenly stuttered.

You opened another door to a small kitchen and grabbed two cups, preparing to make tea for the both o fyou. “It’s honestly fun work for me. Maybe it’s hard on you a bit, because you’ve never experienced this before, but that’s okay. You’ll find your strength someday and have a career that keeps you going. For me, it’s being a florist. My aunt was the one who educated me in this area, so I’ve always followed her footsteps.” You added water to the tea bags in the cups and carried them out to the main shop. Linong gingerly took the handle of the one you held out to him.

“Amazing,” he said in the most innocent voice he could manage. “Well, it’s good that you don’t mind this job. I think it suits you a lot. I mean, you’re practically as pretty as a flower yourself,” he complimented. You shied away, hiding your face in your hair for a brief moment.

“Hey, I just had an odd question. What are your top seven flower recommendations for girls?” He drained the last of his tea and set the cup down. It shined pristinely, like there had never been tea in there. Amazing. Did he like tea that much?

You were suddenly flustered. “U-uh, I have a list on the business website. You can find it there…. there are pretty much recommendations for everyone.”

“Thanks, Well I’ll be talking my leave now. Take it easy, alright?” He saluted you and backtracked out the door. You saluted him back with a small smile, The way he had voice his question was like he had someone in his mind that he liked. Who was it going to be? Maybe Yawei, the president of the debate team and co-captain of the cheerleading squad: both the brainy and athletic type of Asian. Or maybe it would be Tiancai, that one genius Asian artist who always got praised for her artwork even though she made a mess of it (“Now that’s real art!” the teacher said) and wore paint-splotched clothes to school without a care.

You trudged up the stairs with heavy feet, ready to literally crash into your bed. Then you remembered your lit homework sat untouched in your backpack for tomorrow.

Take it easy, my ass.

_______________________________________________________________________

After another couple of days, you were minding the florist shop as usual when Linong walked into the shop with a slight bounce to his step. Okay, unusual. Maybe he was just extra happy and bright today. After all, wasn’t that what he was known for at school? Being overly optimistic?

“Can I help you with anything?” you approahced him, just like a regular employee at a store would do. He shook his head like usual, explaining that he was just browsing. “In fact, I found a pretty cool flower along the way here. Do you guys have these?” 

He held up a daisy and you laughed. “What don’t we have?”

You tended to a few more customers that morning, and sometimes your line of sight would stray over to where Linong squatted. When the last of the morning rush customers had gone, you turned back to Linong. He was like a stray cat that always hung out in your shop and stayed by your side the entire day, doing aimless things. Now, he had that silly daisy in his hand again, only this time half the petals were plucked off and were in a messy arrangement around his feet.

“She loves me, she loves me not, she loves me…” You chuckled as he counted the petals of an odd-petaled flower. Reaching the end, he jumped up and rushed up to your counter. Remembering your job, you also quickly rushed behind it. Linong never bought anything, which you didn’t mind, but you, as a florist, needed to attend to all customer’s needs.

“One orchid arrangement, please!” he said, placing an array of dollar bills and coins on the counter.

“Coming right up.” You reached beneath you and pulled out what you thought had been your best arrangement of orchids and proudly handed it to him. “Here’s your change.” Pause. “For anyone in particular?” You poised a pen over the blank tag on the pot, ready to get indirect dirt on the girl he liked.

“Yes, a very special girl. She’s the most beautiful one, too. Just write that down,” he said nonchalantly. You half-heartedly wrote that on the tag, secretly half-wishing it would be you. Of course it wouldn’t. You bet 60% that it was Yawei, but Tiancai wouldn’t be half bad either.

“Thanks! I hope these will do the trick. I got them from the list of recommendations you personally put on the website, you know.” He winked and left.

Earlier than usual. And little did he know orchids were your favorites.

_______________________________________________________________________

Every day after that he would purchase a new flower arrangement. Tulips. Roses. Delphiniums. Poppies. Asters. And finally, hydrangea. He even requested for a single sunflower. Each day he bought your next favorite. He seemed to get cheerier each day, his hands full of fresh dollar bills and coins. You found yourself forcing a smile each day he came. You had a crush on him so badly you couldn’t stand seeing him take flowers out of your shop for some other girl that he liked when he was the one you liked. How dare he?

Okay, okay, so it was your fault you never told him. Best just to be a regular old florist and not Linong’s secret admirer.

Strangely, on the eighth day, he hadn’t come in at all. With the amount of dedication he had to buying flowers for his girl, you’d think he would have bought something at your shop every day, 365 days a year. But there was no sign of him. Sighing, you flipped the “Open” sign over. You decided to call a few of your friends to help you with a project.

It was another huge flower arrangement order, but this time it was a surprise for someone special. In a few days, your aunt would have her first abby shower with her newlywed husband. This was an event you couldn’t miss, and you wanted to see her after missing her so much on maternity leave. In fact, your flower arrangements had been so successful a couple motnhs ago at her wedding that you suddenly loved your new skill and was soon obsessed with it. Ever since, you’ve had a knack for creating artistic flower arrangements and made the business of the florist shop even larger. That way, your aunt felt that it was afe to hand off major responsibilities to you. Besides, you were almost graduating. Shouldn’t all 17-year-olds have a small, stable job now?

As you waited for your friends to arrive, you heard a soft knocking on the glass of the shop’s door. It was Linong, carrying what looked like a giant lion head. Nope, never mind; in the street light it was more of a giant flower arrangement in a straw basket, with the single sunflower he’d just bought recently sticking out.  You opened the door and stepped out into the cold, steam rising from the breath you took. “It looks nice.”

“Isn’t it?” He looked proud. “Thanks to you.” Your grimace dropped. “You really helped me out this time. I owe you. When I gift this to the girl I love, I’ll definitely make sure to give you credit!” 

You remembered all those times he had secretly broken your heart, all those times he had left your shop with a new bundle of flowers, all those stupid gooddamn times you had to write “to the most special, beautiful girl I know” on the blank tags while gagging inside.

Your friends arrived soon after and you had to shut Linong out of your life now. He looked a bit disappointed as you ran pu the stairs to your room, beginning to work on the 250 flower arrangements for your aunt’s baby shower. His heart felt heavy as he carried the equally heavy basket back to his house. If only you knew…

The day of your aunt’s baby shower finally arrived, and you woke up worried. You had arranged carpools with your friends to get the 250 flower arrangements to the baby shower location before the actual baby shower started so that your aunt wouldn’t notice. Then you remembered that Linong would be there. Oh, screw him! Weren’t you trying to get over him anyway? Why were you still worrying about him? You struggled to lift the delicate flowers into the trunks of your friends’ cars. On the way there, you discussed your Linong dilemma with them, and they were very supportive in saying that they would stand up with you against him whenver needed.

Finally, everything was in place. Your aunt and new uncle arrived in a sleek black car and even got to walk down a makeshift red carpet of red rose petals. When they stepped out, all the guests cheered at the sight of an obvious baby bump. You couldn’t wait for a new baby cousin. Maybe you could be the next teacher in the family’s florist generation, and you could get to teach your cousin. Unless if he was a boy; then he wouldn’t be interested.

After listening to a long speech about how much your aunt was proud of you, she said, “All these flower arrangements today were made by my niece, and I can’t believe she surprised me like this. Coincidentally, I wanted to surprise her as well for working so hard during my maternity leave. Actually, I had a hand in helping someone else plan a surprise for her. So I’m going to introduce him right now. Her friend from school, Chen Linong, come on up!” 

You saw Linong move towards the podium with a large basket of flowers in his arms. The very same flower basket arrangement he had shown you a few days ago.

“Thanks auntie,” he said. “Hi. I’m Chen Linong, and I’m a classmate of her niece who prepared all these beautiful flower arrangements. I wanted to surprise her by making a flower arrangement of my own to confess to her with, although it could never compare to hers. But I hope she’ll still like it.” 

He stepped off the podium and the entire audience “aw”ed with enthusiasm. Your heart pounded as fast as a race car’s maximum mph rate as he walked closer and closer.

Until all you could see right in front of you were hydrangea. Tulips. Roses. Poppies. Asters. Delphiniums. Orchids. The single sunflower poking out cutely.

And the smiling face of Linong, the only (sun)flower that mattered right now.