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astairo · 11 months ago

Note

I have a regulus black request for you!

Reader is a potter but got into Slytherin and James hates her because she’s a Slytherin?

Reader and regulus are inlove but haven’t told eachother even tho everyone can see it

One day James is picking on her for being a Slytherin and she snaps at him and fights him and wins? I dont know something like that

And reader is in the hospital wing alone with regulus and he is verry worried about her and they confess to eachother basically just super fluffy at the end

Courageous Serpent

Regulus Black x fem!Reader

Warnings: Angst, bullying, physical violence, threats, fluff

“Slytherin!”

Y/n would never forget that moment. She remembered how her brother’s gleeful face turned cold and sour. She could never forget the day she lost her brother. All because of a sorting. Their playful banters turned into cold insults and hatred. She felt unstable.

“Bloody disgrace!” Young James Potter sneered at his sister, bumping past her. “Jamie—“ his head snapped to her, “Don’t call me that.” Her eyes widened at his harshness, “But Jamie—“ he pointed his wand towards her, “I said don’t call me that!” Y/n’s lip quivered, overwhelmed and frightened, “I-I’m sorry.” James glared at her, “You should be.” She took a step forward, breathing shakily as he took a step back, “No, I can’t be seen with a bloody serpent.”

His words never left her mind. She would recall all the times he’d promised to be by her side, knowing he’d failed to do so. After all, he was one of the courageous lions, and she was one of the serpents. She had never felt so alone, so outcasted. A bloody disgrace.

“I understand how you feel,” a voice spoke behind the bookshelves of the library. Y/n’s head perked up from her balled up form, wiping her tears, “H-hello?” She looked behind her, watching as a figure emerged from behind the bookshelves, “It’s okay. My brother hates me, too.” She looked at the pale boy, “Who are you?” The boy looked at her tiredly, “Regulus, Regulus Black.” Y/n’s eyes softened, “Sirius’ brother?” Regulus nodded before taking a seat on the floor next to her, “I feel lonely, too.” She looked at him with pity, “You do?” Regulus nodded, glancing back at her, “Mother and father aren’t exactly the kindest people, and Sirius thinks I’m just as bad.” Y/n looked at him sympathetically, “I-I’m sorry you go through that, Regulus.” He shook his head, “It’s quite alright, Potter. Maybe we could be lonely together.” Her expression changed to one of adoration, “You don’t need to pity me. I’m sure you’ll be better off without me.” Regulus smiled at her, “I insist.” Y/n smiled softly, looking down to her hands, “But I’m just a bloody serpent, a disgrace even.” Regulus frowned, “You’re more than that,” he reassured, “You’re anything but a—“

“—Disgrace!” James grinned devilishly as he pointed his wand at Y/n. She felt herself lift off the ground, shrieking. She watched and listened as her brother and his friends pointed and laughed at her misery. “A flying bloody serpent!” One of the boys dramatically shrieked, causing the group to laugh harder. Y/n felt defenseless and vulnerable as she floated around. “Leave her alone, you gits!” A familiar voice rang out, Y/n’s eyes snapping open. She noticed Sirius scowl as James grinned, “Oh my, it’s Reggie!” James mocked as he turned to the pale boy, dropping Y/n harshly. “Leave her alone,” Regulus spoke threateningly, causing the group to snicker. James rolled his eyes, “Or what, Black? Adding that disgrace to your family tapestry won’t solve your issues.” Regulus paused and looked at him, refraining from saying words he might regret.

“James,” Y/n started to get up, immediately getting kicked down. Regulus noticed and rushed over, “N/n, are you alright?” He spoke softly as he helped her up. James scoffed and pushed him off, “Move. One serpent is plenty.” Y/n’s eyes widened when James grasped onto her uniform, harshly tugging her up, “You’re so easy to torment. A coward and a disgrace,” he grinned. Y/n winced at the insults.

Y/n winced as she stumbled through the castle halls, sore from James’ torment. James had gotten more courageous with his torments, getting more and more physical as time went on. By the time her fifth year came around, he was creatively ambitious. Hair dye, her vandalized dorm, itching powder. He even went overboard and attempted to spike her drinks, which she safely avoided.

“Tabby,” Regulus’ voice echoed in the empty corridor, “You’re limping. What’s wrong?” Y/n turned to see him walking up to her, distressed at seeing her state. “Don’t worry about it, Reggie.” Regulus shook his head, “No, I will worry about it, I will worry about you.” Y/n looked at him and smiled, "That's sweet, Reggie.” He smiled, “You’re all I’ve got when I think about it.” Y/n’s expression shifted into appreciation, “Thank you, Reggie. That means a lot coming from you.” Regulus smiled at her, “You mean a lot to me.” His words had her flustered, cheeks tinted pink, “Y-you mean a lot to me, too, Reggie.” He nodded, wrapping his arm around her waist to support her.

Y/n quickly scowled, pushing away from her brother, “Enough.” James scoffed and looked at her in disbelief, “Enough? Who are you to tell me what’s enough? You’re just a bloody serpent.” Regulus heard this and went to step in. Sirius quickly tugged his younger brother back, making him fall into the ground. James snickered at this, looking back at Y/n, “That thing isn’t going to make everything better,” he sneered, “Stop wasting your time with that waste and actually make use of yourself.”

Y/n couldn’t contain herself, harshly shoving her brother back and pulling her wand out, “He isn’t a waste!” James’ friends snickered from behind, infuriating him, “Watch your damn words, serpent.” Y/n’s patience crumbled, spitting out a spell. She gasped as she watched her brother fly back into a tree, “I—“ Before she could apologize, a strong force hit her chest, causing her to fall back. She winced and looked to find her brother’s wand pointed directly at her, “How dare you,” he snarled. Y/n felt herself shrink under his deadly gaze, “It was an accident.” James only scoffed as he walked towards her, “Of course it was ‘just an accident.’ It’s always an accident, a mistake, when it comes to you,” he snarled and kicked her side, causing her to wince at the sudden contact.

Regulus’ eyes widened and went to help, only to be held back by his brother, “Let go!” Y/n’s gaze shifted to her best friend, only for James to harshly revert it back to him, “You’re nothing but a disgrace to this damn family, and that’s all you’ll ever be.” James’ tone was laced with venom and hatred towards his sister, showing no sign of remorse or guilt. “It’s the fact that I can hex you right now, and no one would care for you, you filthy serpent. Not mum, dad, me,” his grasp tightened around her face, “Not even him.” Y/n felt herself snap at his words, “Stupefy!”

Students walking past had stopped to watch the commotion, gasping as James flew back. In the matter of seconds, spells were thrown back and forth between the two. Just as Y/n raised her wand to cast another spell, James moved quickly and hit her. Y/n felt herself falling to the ground, harshly hitting her head. James smirked down at his work, quickly scrambling away with his friends when Professor McGonagall appeared hurriedly. Regulus quickly scrambled to her side and told her what had happened. “Thank you, Mr. Black,” she spoke worriedly as she looked down to the barely conscious girl, “I’ll take it from here. If you could please bring Miss Potter to Madam Pomfrey, I’d gladly appreciate it.” Regulus didn’t wait for her to finish and quickly helped his tabby up to the hospital wing.

Y/n awoke hours later with a raging headache. As her eyes fluttered open, Regulus was quickly there to comfort her, “You’re alright, tabby. You’re safe with me.” She looked up with appreciation, “Thank you, Reggie.” He smiled and handed her a small vial, “Pomfrey said to give you this once you woke up. I reckon it’s for your head.” She nodded, quickly drinking the substance. Regulus watched her sigh and relax into the bed, ultimately breaking the silence, “You have no idea how upset I was.” Y/n looked at him, confused, “What?” Regulus scooted closer, holding her hand, “Tabby, I watched him hurt you, and I couldn’t protect you.” She frowned, “You don’t have to protect me, Reggie—“ “I care for you too much.”

Y/n’s gaze softened at his words, “And I care for you too.” Regulus looked at her, kissing her knuckles lightly, “As much as I do, you’re too oblivious.” She cocked her head, “Simplify?” Regulus shook his head, leaning in and planting his lips on hers. Y/n’s eyes widened, ultimately closing as she melted into him. The two parted away, Regulus slightly trying to chase her lips. They stared at each other with pink-tinted faces and small smiles. “How was that for a kiss, tabby cat?” He whispered cheerfully. Y/n shook her head, “You have no idea how long I’ve waited to do that, Reggie.” He gazed at her, “Now you don’t have to. By all means, kiss me however and whenever you want, my tabby cat. I promise you won’t regret it.” Y/n chuckled, “I could never regret being with you.” The pair smiled and embraced each other, better intertwined.

#regulus black x reader #regulus black x y/n #regulus black x female reader #regulus black x you #regulus black #r.a.b #timothee chalamet fanfiction #timothee fanfic #timothee chalamet #mauraders era #harry potter

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t1oui · 13 days ago

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thinking about how living w regulus would affect harry like

he's such a fucking snob about everything. food, decor, fashion, you name it, he's got opinions on it.

he does ballet despite being the least graceful person on the planet. he's somehow pretty good at it, likely out of spite

speaks french

very much a cat person, has a cat named leo who is his baby

like yk how james and sirius are extremely codependent? that's how harry is w leo. both of them can not handle being apart from each other too long

reads a lot of stories

thinks seeker is the best quidditch position

on that note, lots of slytherin house pride. james hates it. harry refuses to put any gryffindor decorations up in his room

harry loves taking pictures just like reg so the house is filled with photographs

and ofc harry is snobby about what types of cameras he uses thanks to reg. james now just lets them deal with the cameras & photography stuff bc he's scared to get the wrong thing lol

harry is taller than reg but bc dysphoria all of reg's old clothes (like quidditch jerseys + hoodies and stuff) are his size so half his wardrobe is from reg's hogwarts days

definitely the type of guy to change his bedding & curtains & everything in his room based on the season. will anybody actually be in there other than him and his parents? not really, but he MUST redecorate

idk what this even means but snobby about candles. this is another thing james is scared to buy him

harry and reg speak french w each other more than english

since james doesn't speak french w harry (i hc he's only comfortable speaking it w reg) harry is used to having a conversation in two different languages so sometimes he'll be speaking french w his friends without noticing

he'll be in the middle of a rant and realize they don't understand a thing he's saying lol

reg and harry control the decorating for every holiday, every birthday, etc.

the one thing harry knows how to do that reg doesn't/reg didn't teach him is cooking. reg never cooked for himself as a child so james was the one who taught him

doesn't look like it most of the time but all of harry's clothes are very expensive... did i mention he's a snob

harry is such a dry texter/writer... he's such a dick about grammar when it comes to writing even tho he can barely string a sentence together when speaking

deeply sarcastic (look! a canon detail! we never thought we'd see that on this account, did we?)

will take his partners on the most expensive dates & whatnot like it's nothing... cedric the farmboy™️ is not prepared

writes sad boy poetry when he gets annoyed w someone... like harry will storm off all pissed and then he comes back 20 mins later with a beautifully written, very angry poem for whoever made him mad

has so many clothes & different curtains and bedding sets for different seasons that he also uses the closet in the guest room (reg takes up 99% of his and james's closet for the same reason)

has an inherent hatred of fake plants

bedroom is simultaneously tidy and so messy a hurricane might as well have come through

leaves a book behind everywhere he goes

secretly the worst sense of humor lmao

he may not have gotten his love of drawing/painting from regulus, but you def see reg in the way he is, you guessed it, a massive snob about art supplies

soooo indecisive. redoes his room at least twice a year

an asshole when he gets less than 10 hours of sleep... he's mildly tolerable after 3 cups of coffee (black, of course) but you might as well just ignore him until he gets a nap in

on that note is very good at making coffee and is, drum roll please, a massive snob about it. who would've guessed (somebody count how many times i've said snob in this post and comment it please and thank you)

if he doesn't like a gift he's horrible at pretending he's happy w it so people usually go through reg whenever they buy him something... this goes both ways too, people go through harry when buying something for reg

is visually james and lily's but in personality is really just reg's (and also lily's... he definitely inherited his spite from her lol)

is a crazy cat lady by age 20

at least 10 pictures of leo in his room... he has whole photoshoots for her and she poses for them

might as well not hang out w harry at his house bc he'll make out with his cat the whole time

loves going to art museums w regulus

he's a, surprise surprise, snob about art. james just doesn't comment on art altogether atp

his vocabulary is a weird mashup of french, english, and hindi that makes it very hard for anybody who doesn't know him well to understand what he's saying lol

looks angry until he smiles (he got this from lily but a life with reg has perfected it)

needs a golden retriever to his black cat in any given relationship (enter cedric and cho) (yes i'm going to push my rarepair on everyone reading this)

tl;dr being raised by/living w regulus has turned harry into a massive snob about literally everything and regulus is proud of it (blink twice if you need help, james)

#hp fandom #harry potter fandom #hp #marauders era #harry potter #james potter #regulus black #jegulus #jegulus raising harry #regulus raising harry really #leo the cat #let's give her her own tag :)#she is immortal btw. leo never dies #anyway

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msmk11 · 3 months ago

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Trou Noir

Regulus Black x gn!reader

WC: 665

CW: Angst; hurt no comfort; Regulus’ death; mention of bile (no graphic description just the word)

Summary: Mourning your husband.

Day 12 of mk’s mad dash

A tragic romance. That’s what people liked to call it.

“Right person, wrong time” they would sigh.

And you hated it. Maybe it was true. No, it was true. But they had no right to say it. They were the same ones who had silently judged from afar- who’d scoffed and claimed that you two wouldn’t last.

They had no right to mourn.

You remained seated stiffly in a hard folding chair as everyone rose to pay their respects to you and your brother-in-law.

“I’m so sorry for your loss, he will be missed,” they all said, the words piercing your heart bit by bit until it shattered everywhere.

You tried to keep from scoffing. Most of the people at this funeral ignored your husband on the daily. When he needed their help the most, they turned a blind eye. They scolded him and called him a coward, an outcast, a villain. They couldn’t miss him when he was never a part of their lives in the first place. They couldn’t long for Regulus- someone they never had.

But despite the sickening insincerity that forced bile up your throat, you trudged onward with a stony expression. It’s what he always did in the face of discomfort, anyhow.

Your brave, beautiful Regulus.

Finally, after what felt like days, the few remaining guests filed out of the small church in which the funeral was held. Now there was only you and Sirius left.

Sirius.

You never much liked the older Black boy- especially after he abandoned his brother. But Regulus never stopped loving him. Even when he tried to hide it, you always knew that your husband longed for the relationship he once had with Sirius. His brother was everything to him, even when he’d been discarded by him like trash. So, though you had no empathy for the older Black, when the fiery Gryffindor broke down into sobs, you knew what Regulus would’ve wanted you to do. Ever so carefully, you reluctantly placed a hand on his shoulder.

Sirius turned towards you with tears streaming down his face, “I- I’m so sorry. I should’ve been there for him. He would’ve still been alive had I not left him behind.”

He began to cry even harder.

“No, you shouldn’t have left him behind” you agreed, “But Regulus forgave you. He always wanted you to be happy and safe, even if it meant he wasn’t.”

“You’re probably just saying that,” Sirius sniffled.

“Black,” you began, “I’ve never been fond of you and I've been pretty honest about it. Never have I once put something nicely to avoid hurting your feelings. I sure as hell am not starting now. I’m telling the truth.”

The man nodded with a small smile.

A sharp pain shot through your heart.

Who would’ve thought the two brothers shared a smile?

Refusing to cry in front of Sirius, you stood and began to gather your things, using your flutter of motion as a chance to hide from the man before you.

“Well, I need to be heading out, Black. I’m very tired. My condolences,” you mumbled.

As you turned to leave, he protested, “Wait! Can- can we meet up sometime? To talk about Reggie? I- I want to know more about him. Maybe then I can find a way to forgive myself and move on. Maybe you can move on too.”

You hesitated.

What right did Sirius have to ask you such a question after all this time. What was he owed after neglecting your husband for years? Why should you say yes?

Maybe it was because misery loved company, or because you were drawn to anything related to your husband, but you finally sighed in agreement.

“Fine. But don’t call him Reggie. You lost that privilege long ago. Meet me at the Leaky Cauldron on Friday- 6:00.”

You and Sirius would never be the best of friends. But perhaps, through conversation, you would both heal from the Regulus-sized hole in your hearts.

#marauders fanfiction #marauders fandom #harry potter fanfiction #the maruaders #regulus black hurt/comfort #regulus black x you #regulus black x reader #regulus black x y/n #regulus black #regulus black hurt/no comfort #regulus black angst #regulus black deserved better #regulus x reader #regulus x you #regulus x y/n #regulus black fic #regulus black fanfiction #mk's mad dash

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elysianymph · 1 year ago

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🔥 anything about sirius because i am being a little hater towards some characterisations too

i've already talked your ears off about this on discord but i'm happy to talk to about it again bc i fucking HATE new sirius black with a burning passion. i hate him as much as i love my sirius black that marauderstok can pry from my cold dead hands bc i'm not letting him go. i don't know when it happened and why but marauders fans are particularly persistent on taking away any interesting traits sirius had and leaving behind a whimpering pathetic twink that cries when someone looks at him the wrong way. sirius has been scrubbed clean of any morally grey traits he might've had (he's not allowed to care for his family (unless it's regulus) or long for them bc they are bad, he's not allowed to have any prejudices even though he was literally raised with pureblood mentality and taught he was superior to everyone else from the day he was born, he's not allowed to be an asshole bc he's not like his family guys!! and when he is an asshole it's always used to victimize the character he's being an asshole to and sirius is painted as the villain with mommy issues that can only be fixed by getting dicked down apparently)

i cannot stress this enough: LET THIS MAN BE A COMPLEX CHARACTER!! and no, giving him mental illnesses that miraculously disappear when he gets together with remus and making him attempt to kill himself post prank because he feels bad is NOT making him complex! you're just weird. you're just romanticizing mental illnesses and i can't believe you don't see anything wrong with it. giving him bipolar to justify his actions is?? not??? representation??? it's offensive to people who actually have to deal with these issues in their day to day lives and yet here you are using something that will impact their life forever as a plot device for your uwu sadboy mlm fanfic.

and that's what new sirius boils down to. he's a plot device, an accessory to everyone else's story that's never given much depth other than "oh his mom used the cruciatus on him and now he's traumatized". no hate to jegulus but hate to specific jegulus fics that turn sirius into an overdramatic caricature of his former self for the sake of drama and angst.

also, some of these wolfstar shippers... wtf are you guys on?? idk when and why (that's a lie i do but i'm not gonna say it) remus became sirius black in a werewolf costume but here we are. oh sirius was cool and effortlessly smart and handsome and girls wanted him? well guess what? snatches all of those character traits and throws them onto remus they're his character traits now. ignore how it doesn't make any sense for the werewolf child who was isolated from the rest of the world to be a smooth talking alpha casanova who plays basketball actually. while we're at it, ignore how unrealistic it is for a boy who was raised in a family that believed they were superior to everyone else based on blood status, who was raised to be the perfect heir and checked off all the traits needed to be one to be insecure?? and unsure of himself?? and stupid??? and a loser??? i don't understand what the point of flipping the wolfstar dynamic was when you're left with a shallow copy of the original but ok. you do you ig.

to summarize, my sirius is cool and effortlessly smart and egotistical and a complete asshole who thinks he's the best thing ever. is it an act to cover up how damaged he thinks he is because of his family? possibly. but i also fully believe sirius thought he was a god amongst men and everyone should be glad to be in his presence. he talked down to other people because he considered himself smarter, he rolled his eyes when students asked stupid questions and made fun of them when they got an answer wrong. he's a teenage boy let him be a dick with no excuses.

(also i find it funny when people write about sirius getting into a fight with james or remus and crying because they said something mean. as if sirius wouldn't throw hands the moment someone started criticizing him. he's toxic and that's what makes him interesting. that's his purpose! characters exist to make stories interesting, to start drama, not to be your moral guide on how to act. stories become so much more fun once you let go of the need to make every character a good person. also liking a character doesn't equal liking them as a person. i love sirius but i would hate his guts irl)

#i feel like i can never fully write what i want to say and i hate it #wish i could take you guys on a tour of my brain. it's crazy up in here #thank you for letting me talk zandra it's almost like you knew what was bothering me znjzjzj #it's really not that deep (i say after writing an entire post about it)#(it's not i just like to talk to myself and hope someone will listen bc i am very very passionate can you tell?)#sirius black #mwpp #marauders #marauders era #nymph answers #hating hours 🔥#just to be safe #tw mental illness #tw sui attempt

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moonagedaydream13 · 3 months ago

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I love you, i’m sorry

Jegulus microfic - 777 words - angst

First microfic and first time posting my writing so pls me nice :)

Regulus knew, of course he knew. He knew the day Sirius left him alone in that hollow, cold house. And now he was simply trying to survive, or more accurately, you could say he was protecting him. Because in the end, it always leads back to James.

He stood there, at the top of the astronomy tower. It was cold tonight, looking just on the brim of rain, matching the feelings regulus was carrying. He knew James would find him up here, he didn't know how the boy did it, but James never failed to find Regulus, even when he didn't want to be found. Just on time, Regulus heard the sound of footsteps behind him, he knew it was James, who else would it be.

“Hey, you didn’t come down to eat” James said as he walked up beside Regulus, leaning towards the boy. Regulus' face was hidden in the dark, hiding his red, glossy eyes. He hated that he’d been crying, he hated that the second he heard James' voice, he wanted to cry all over again. “I wasn’t hungry” Regulus says, barely above a whisper.

It was silent for a moment before James finally spoke, “Reg, what happened?”. Regulus felt his eyes burn, “I'm sorry James” he’s crying now, “i'm so, so sorry”. And James, being the man he is, wraps Regulus in his arms, holding him close while whispering sweet words to his boyfriend. “Hey, it’s alright love, you're ok”.

“No, no it’s not.” It’s wrong, Regulus can’t do this to him, he forces himself to take a step back, leaving James arms even if his body protests. He wishes the world would stop, that everything would stop and give him more time. He wishes he could travel back in time, all to avoid the pained look of confusion on James face. “Regulus?” is all James says. While still crying, all he can muster up is “i’m sorry”, a look of realization crosses James face and it’s like the entire world came crashing down.

James was now crying, along with Regulus, he looked at him like he was trying to read his thoughts. Looking like he was waiting for Regulus to tell him it wasn't true, but all James could do was reach out for his boyfriend's arm, reluctantly Regulus let him. He lifted Regulus’s sleeve to reveal what he was dreading most, ink sprawled onto his skin, poisoning his veins. He felt his heart break, because the boy he loved looked at him with betrayal. The air grew thick as neither dared to speak a word.

“It’s not too late, reg, you can still leave, come stay with me” James begs him, trying to convince him to go and live with him, to run away from all of this. “Look, before you say no, just, i graduate soon and i’m moving into my own place, there’s extra rooms, it works' ' he's crying, “just please reg”. Oh how he wishes it would be that easy. “I can’t, James you know I can’t” he wishes the other boy would understand. “No, don’t say that”, “please just stay, stay with me, we can be happy Regulus”. He wishes he could stay, every bone in his body is begging him to run away with James, he wants nothing more than to hold onto him and never let him go, to kiss him until he can’t breathe, to tell James, ‘please take me, no matter what i say, bring me with you.’ but he knows it’s already too late as he feels his arm sting where the mark is.

He pulls his hand away from James' hold, “I'm sorry” he whispers. Please forgive me James. And oh Regulus wants to take everything back, James looks like he was just stabbed in the heart, and Regulus was holding the knife. James Potter, the boy who smiles so brightly, like he’s the sun himself is now looking like he lost all light in his eyes. Regulus did that. He managed to burn the only boy he truly loved. The only person he let himself be loved by.

So much goes unspoken between them, leaving them destined to be an unfinished story, a tale that gets lost and eventually forgotten.

Without another word, he leaves. Leaving James standing there, alone.

I’m sorry James, he thinks to himself, please forgive me.

Please forgive me, he thinks as he walks into the cave alone, I love you, he thinks as the water clings to his skin. Don’t forget me, he thinks as hands begin to claw at his skin. ‘Sirius’ he whispers in his last breath before being dragged into the water.

#jegulus #james fleamont potter #regulus black #regulus deserved better #jegulus microfic #jegulus fic #marauders #marauders era #the marauders #james potter #slytherin #regulus arcturus black #sirius and regulus #i miss you i’m sorry gracie abrams #i love you i’m sorry gracie abrams #jegulus angst #jegulus fanfic

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rainroses45 · 6 months ago

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Over the Edge

☾ description: i don’t know how to describe this basically you have a one to one talk with sirius and regulus makes a surprise appearance (Sirius Black & Sister Reader)

☾ a/n: i watched the edge of seventeen cried my heart out AND THEN WROTE THIS BC OMG I GOT MAJOR INSPO (NOT EDITED)

☾ song inspiration: Novo amor - ontario instrumental

☾ Warnings: uuummm none that i can’t think of..does sadness count?

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽ the edge of seventeen ☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

┊ ┊ ┊ ┊ ┊

┊ ┊ ┊ ˚★⋆｡˚ ⋆

┊ ┊ ⋆

┊ ★⋆

You stood in front of the dimly lit hallway - watching, waiting for some explosion to happen. A giant fire or a crash of useless antics giving you a reason to open the door, yet nothing happened. The whisk of the cool air caused a ghostly tune to string your ears into a ringing of pain. You continued to stand still but what if, what if you could just drop dead and never have to speak to him again. Curse this stupid family, and curse this pride you held within your harden heart.

The door seemed to stretch farther and farther away from you with every tick of that annoying clock downstairs. Without letting another thought pass through the statue of time, you took a shaky step forward and knocked on his door.

You stared at the black door for a moment before deciding to leave, but just as you were about to turn your back, you heard the creak of the floorboards.

Sirius opened the door. He simply believed it was Regulus needing comfort after having another nightmare situation with father, but he was surprised to see you 5 feet away from him. His younger sister, his only sister, his stupid dump sister that he tries so hard to protect from his parents.

Gently he closed the door behind him, stepping forward into the cold hallway. He said nothing as he took a step towards you, a harden face that reeked of anger but held sadden eyes.

You looked at the floor tinning your lips trying to remember what you were going to say.

“I- I just wanted to say that I’m,” you stumbled over your words as you looked at him wide eye and nervous. “I’m sorry for being a bitch tonight….and for the past couple of weeks, and the past couple of 15 years before that.”

He avoided your gaze, looking down the railing way of the stairs. His hands grasped onto the darkened wood, zoning down at it as you continued your apology.

“I know this isn’t any easier for you- or that,” he looked up to see your gaze soften at your words. You fiddled with your hands trying not to shake.

“I think some deranged part of me was thinking I’m the only one with real problems,” you lightly laughed as you looked up at him. “Like that makes me special,” you took a deep breath, “you know ever since we were little I would get this feeling like - like I’m floating outside of my body looking down at myself and I hate what I see.” Your lip trembled as you tried to wipe away the tears falling down your face. Your older brother stood still, watching as a tear ran down your cheek and fell to the floor.

“How I’m acting, the way I sound,” the rasping of your voice against your throat caused you to cough a bit. Roughly you wiped you face as you tried to stand strong. You probably looked pathetic right now crying in front of your brother who had to go through so much worse compared to you.

“And I don’t know how to change it,” you lowered your gaze down disgusted, “and I’m so scared that that feeling is never gonna go away.” Your chest rose fast but would never rest as you let the tears fall. Sirius stood still letting out a sigh before letting you continue.

“I’m sorry, really-“ you look up at him for the first time with a clear vision before turning around to head to your room. “Good night.” You whispered, leaving your brother alone in the hallway.

Sirius snapping out of his thoughts quickly called out quietly, “Y/n.”

You turned around from the staircase looking at your brother. He was wearing his pajamas from school. The proud colors of red and yellow blinded you. They stood illuminating the darkness of your black dress that mother had chosen for you for tonights dinner party.

Sirius walked towards you determinedly which caused you to flinch in fear. Grunting, your brother pulled you into a hug, holding you tightly towards his chest. You shockingly put your arms around him and closed your eyes.

“This is nice,” you took a deep breath, letting your tears stain his shirt.

“So I don’t get invited to group hugs or what?” Both of you let go as you saw Regulus making his way upstairs. “Unbelievable, I turn my back to go eat a cream puff and my two siblings are hugging without me.”

“Oh get in here you nitwit,” you laughed you pulled him into the hug. Now all of you were crying silently into each others arms. You wish it could be like this forever, but you were part of the noble House of Black. A truly distinguished punishment of the fates.

“I love you guys.” You whispered.

“We love you too sis.”

HELLLOO LOVIESSS IM ALIVEEE!!! and i’m trying to stay active with writing since i’m out of school (have been for a while but been recovering from a burn out) and what better way to keep me going then writing sad fluff :) MUAH MUAH

#sirius black #sirius black x sister reader #regulus black #regulus black x sister reader #sister reader #the noble and most ancient house of black #marauders #harry potter #marauders era #sibling fluff #RECOVERING THE TRAUMA OF THIS FANDOM #sirius orion black #sirius and regulus #regulus deserved better #the edge of seventeen #I LOVE THAT MOVIE SO MUCH

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seriousbrat · 10 months ago

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why I don't think the Blacks were actually that wealthy is this:

"A reasonable amount of gold."

So, Harry inherits ALL of Sirius's money, house, his house-elf. Since Grimmauld Place goes to Sirius after the death of his parents, it's fair to assume that he also got all their money. He also, as we know, inherited a good chunk of gold from his Uncle Alphard. Being in Azkaban for 12 years and later living in hiding/at Grimmauld place, he probably did not spend much of that money. His one big expense is the Firebolt, which, yeah, is expensive but if the Blacks had been uber loaded like they're portrayed in fic, I don't think Dumbledore would have used the word "reasonable" to describe what was left to Harry.

Reasonable suggests to me that yeah, it's a decent amount. But it's not MORE than what Harry already had. It's not an EXTREME amount.

Another thing for me is the matter of Bellatrix's marriage. Narcissa and Lucius seem to genuinely be in love, but I don't think Bellatrix mentions Rodolphus, her literal husband, ONCE (correct me if I'm wrong but I'm fairly certain) in the ENTIRE series. She was in love with Voldemort. She probably didn't want to marry Rodolphus and clearly didn't care much about him. This suggests to me that the motivations behind this marriage were financial rather than romantic. Even Narcissa's marriage to Lucius was probably financially motivated, even though they were lucky enough to actually be a good match. Walburga married her own cousin- again, this was likely financially motivated.

The other clue is Grimmauld Place itself. Historically, wealthy/aristocratic families would have a london townhouse for the season, but reside most of the time in country estates or manor houses. There's no mention of any Black family estate at all, and if there was one Sirius being the eldest male heir would have inherited it, as would Harry later. The fact that the Blacks live only in their London house (which is not even that ostentatious, it's terraced and between Muggle houses. why would they choose this.) suggests to me that any country estate they might have had was sold. I guess you could argue that Cygnus and his daughters lived there, but he was the younger male so i find this unlikely. If anything, it would have gone to Alphard. It might have passed to Cygnus upon his death, but that still leaves Walburga without.

What I think happened was that the Blacks were a typical old money family with dwindling resources. Likely Orion and Walburga did not work, and yet still clung to a lavish, aristocratic lifestyle while burning the galleons they had. Grimmauld Place is in a state of disrepair, and yeah it's been abandoned for 12+ years but imo it probably started before that. Kreacher is OBSESSED with Black family heirlooms, which suggests that Walburga probably was too- likely she clung onto them as signs of her family's wealth and status, which was fading away before her eyes.

Personally I think Alphard probably inherited the bulk of what was left of the Black fortune, possibly an estate which he then either sold or gave to someone else- but presumably not Walburga, as she blasted him off the tapestry.

And the blasting of Alphard itself. Yeah Walburga hated Sirius and anyone who looked kindly on him, but imo if had she been rolling in it and money was of no concern, Alphard leaving Sirius some gold might not have been especially noteworthy to her. I believe that she was hoping that either she or Regulus would inherit the gold, and when he left it to Sirius she reacted VERY angrily. Because tbh, it might have just gone to him by default as the eldest male heir if Cygnus was dead by that time, which if this is the case seems likely because Alphard DID leave Sirius money. If it was just about him being fond of Sirius she likely would have blasted him off earlier. It seems to me like it was about the money, and to me explains why Walburga was so bitter and so possessive over her legacy.

edit: it is actually canon that inheritance in the Black family goes through the male line:

#honestly even if they were loaded and it passed to cygnus... that still leaves walburga without lmao #imo the potters were nouveau riche and WERE wealthier #thanks to fleamonts hair care empire #and the existence of this sort of family must have been agonising to walburga haha #I see them as eventually going the same way as the Gaunts. I mean kind of they did. the black surname is gone #ig potentially orion inherited money but again. where is it #sirius #sirius black #walburga black #walburga #black family #meta

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emlovessid · 1 year ago

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September 1, 1972

He follows along nervously after Sirius, hand grasped in his brother’s like a safety net. He’s trying to take in everything as they make their way onto the train; the people, the chaos, the train itself.

“Boys!” Sirius beams as they stop in front of an open compartment.

Inside are three other boys; it’s not hard to guess who they are, Sirius hasn’t stopped talking about them all summer.

“Sirius!” they all shout back in unison, jumping up to pull his brother into a hug.

“This is my brother, Reggie,” Sirius introduces him once they’ve pulled back.

After a chorus of Hey, Reggie! they take their seats again, him and Sirius sitting down next to the boy wearing glasses. As the train begins to move and the boys all start talking at once recounting their summers, he relaxes into the conversation and finds himself laughing at more than one of their stories.

If this is anything to go by, he thinks he’ll like Hogwarts.

September 1, 1973

“Are you sure you don’t want to sit with us?” Sirius says from the doorway, James and Peter chatting animatedly in the compartment behind him.

Remus slips past them with a hello, quickly joining in on his friends’ conversation.

“Yes, I’m sure. I have my own friends, you know?” Regulus sighs, though he really does appreciate his brother looking out for him.

“I know, I know. Just remember, the offer always stands.” Sirius pulls him into a hug then, pressing a quick kiss into his hair before letting him go. “Have fun, Reggie. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do!”

“That’s the stupidest thing you’ve ever said, there’s literally nothing you wouldn’t do,” he says with a playful shove. “See you at dinner.”

September 1, 1974

He leaves his brother, who’s just thrown himself onto James’ back like a koala, on the platform in search of his friends.

He finds Evan first, who’s chatting with his sister and her friend Dorcas.

“Reg! How are you, mate?” Evan says, slinging an arm around his shoulder and pulling him into a hug. “Let’s go find Barty. Bye Pandora, bye Dorcas!”

It doesn’t take long to find Barty, standing in the doorway of an otherwise empty compartment, blocking it from anyone else who might want to take it. Barty’s face lights up when he sees them, quickly ushering them inside.

“Good summers?” Evan asks as they take their seats, getting settled for the journey; which means taking up as much space as humanly possible.

“The best!” Barty pipes in. “You’ll never guess who I bumped into.”

September 1, 1975

As soon as he’s on the train and out of his parents’ sight, he’s rushing up the corridor, eyeing each compartment as he passes.

He doesn’t hesitate when he finds what he’s looking for, throwing open the compartment door. Sirius is on his feet before Regulus can step in any further, arms coming tight around him, holding him close to his chest.

“You’re okay, you’re okay, you’re okay,” Sirius is muttering into his hair. Regulus isn’t sure which one of them he’s trying to reassure, perhaps both.

“I’m fine. Are you okay?” Regulus asks shakily as he pulls back, hands still tight on his brother’s arms as he scans his face.

“I’m okay. They didn’t hurt you, too?”

Regulus shakes his head, bringing his arms back around his brother. He catches James’ eye over Sirius’ shoulder, whispers, “Thank you, for keeping him safe.”

James simply nods, “Of course.”

September 1, 1976

“Reg! To what do I owe the pleasure?” James beams when he notices Regulus standing in the door to his compartment. James is by himself, stretched out across one of the seats, arm folded behind his head.

“I came to say hi to my idiot brother, where is he?”

James laughs, a full-bodied laugh that has him clutching at his chest. Regulus hates the way it makes his insides twist a little.

“Him and Remus disappeared before we even got out of London, I can almost guarantee they’re off snogging somewhere. You might want to wait until we’re at Hogwarts.”

He probably should have guessed that.

“Fair call, I don’t need to walk in on that.”

“Try sharing a dormitory with them. The things I’ve seen, Reg,” James says with a shudder.

“My condolences,” Regulus laughs, lingers in the doorway for a moment. “See you ‘round, James.”

He ignores the flutter in his chest when James gives him a warm smile.

“See you ‘round.”

September 1, 1977

He’s walking back from the bathroom when he feels fingers wrap around his wrist, tugging him unexpectedly into a compartment.

He smiles as hands come up to his face, slipping behind his head to thread in his hair. Lips meet his and it feels like coming home.

“I thought we were going to meet up after the feast?” Regulus laughs.

“I missed you too much,” James sighs into his mouth. “God, I missed you.”

“Tell me about it, longest summer of my life,” Regulus replies, pulling away to kiss the corner of his mouth, his cheek, his forehead. “I love you.”

James runs his hands down Regulus’ sides as he rests their foreheads together, looking down at him through lashes.

“I love you, so much.”

For the first time in two months, Regulus feels like he can breathe again; without the pressure of his parents’ watchful eyes, and the added weight of missing James, bearing down on him all summer.

September 1, 1978

Unlike the last six years he’d arrived at Platform Nine and Three Quarters, this time feels much less like a reunion and much more like a goodbye.

A goodbye to Hogwarts, to his friends, to the last time they’d be making this journey.

A goodbye to his parents, who he wouldn’t be returning home to at the end of the school year.

A goodbye to James, who met him on the platform to see him off, kissing him without a care in the world who saw them.

#a collection of reunions at king's cross station #regulus black #james potter #jegulus #jegulus fic #marauders #sometimes i write things

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thebibutterflyao3 · 10 months ago

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Day 2 - Prompt: Luxuriate @pandalilymicrofics

February Daily Series - 695 words

**TW: brief mention of a parent’s transphobia**

<<<Previous Part

James mentioned a woman named “Lily” specifically. Why?

Pandora paused her frantic packing and grabbed her phone from the dresser. She needed more than a first name. After a thorough search through Sirius’s recent Instagram posts, she found one that was tagged @ lilyflower, but her profile was private.

“Aren’t you lovely?” she whispered, opening the photo of the pretty redhead dancing with Sirius.

“Where are you going?”

She ignored her brother’s question as she stuffed her mobile in the pocket of her skirt. Thankfully, this one was vintage and actually had usable pockets sewn in. Pandora tucked in the last few bits and bobs, then closed the bulging bag.

“Shut up and help me,” she huffed, tugging on the zipper.

Evan appeared at her side to lean on the top of the bag. “Don’t be snippy. Mum said you were ‘abandoning us for that girl,’” he imitated, scowling as he added, “so I assume the old cow meant Regulus.”

“Yes, I was invited to Wales to meet his new boyfriend. He’s from Scotland, I think, so taking a train to Wales was more convenient.”

“Can I come too? You can’t leave me here with them, Pandora,” he chastised, hitching his thumb over his shoulder. “You know as well as I do that their ‘party’ is complete shite.”

Pandora shook her head. “I didn’t buy the ticket, James did. Besides, I’ve had enough of you for one holiday.”

“Come on! I’m bored!”

“That’s what happens when you dump your boyfriend.”

Evan glared at her as she pulled the suitcase to the floor. “You know perfectly well why I had to do that! I didn’t want to. He’s just…”

“Toxic? An arsehole? A lying, cheating prick?” she suggested, smiling brightly.

“Says you! He wasn’t that way with me.”

“Then why did you break up with him?”

Evan ducked his head and grumbled under his breath. “Because he hurt Regulus.”

“Exactly!”

“But I didn’t know that when we started dating! We met at the shop, and it was long-distance most of the time. You didn’t know either, until you spoke to him,” he defended.

Pandora shrugged, then pulled up the handle on her suitcase. “Never met him in person and Reg didn’t like to FaceTime back then. That doesn’t change who he is. When you know better, you do better.”

“So what? You’re punishing me now? I have to stay here in hell while you luxuriate in some lush Welsh Inn?”

“I doubt it’s posh, Evan. It’s Wales, not Versailles.”

“I miss Versailles. So many pretty blokes,” he said wistfully. “We should go back.”

She waved him off as she searched for her purse. It was a bright green bag that she’d crocheted herself when she was in her yarn phase. “Then go back. No one’s stopping you. I’m quite happy in London. I have a decent job and a nice flat with Reg and Dorcas.”

“You don’t have to rub it in.”

“Sure I do. You made your choice, Evan, and I made mine.”

“I like my job! I just hate it here.”

She threw a hand up to stop the incoming tirade she’d heard on repeat since coming home last week. “Enough. You’re an adult, act like one.”

He closed his mouth and snatched up the handle of her luggage. She knew he was frustrated, but she’d hit her breaking point. Even compassion had its limits.

“Look, I’m sorry for leaving you behind. I just need to enjoy a little of this holiday. As much as I love you, you’re infuriating!”

“Me? You’re the one ripping my head off and hiding in your room!” Evan shot back, roughly yanking her suitcase down the stairs.

The case barely survived its perilous journey to the front door, and Pandora was grateful she’d remembered to tuck her glasses into its hard case for once. With a stern warning to stay awake to watch for “train hooligans,” her mother hugged her and shooed her away. Outside the house, a town car that James insisted on sending idled. Before she knew it, she was staring through double-paned train windows in first class as the world flew by while her mind fixated on one name.

Lily. Why did he mention “Lily?”

Next Part>>>

#lily x pandora #pandalily #pandolily #pandora rosier #pandora lovegood #regulus and pandora #evan rosier #marauders #the marauders #muggle au

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lakeofflowerss · 3 months ago

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a kiss of moon and salt

English is not my first language so I apologise in advance for my mistakes.

inspired by a verse of an argentinian children's song called Luna Lunar

The gentle swaying of the sea was the most beautiful music for that moment. The beach breeze caressed their faces so softly and sweetly that it could evoke what the stories mention that a mother's caress feels like. Regulus and Sirius never felt it, at least not from their mother, but from their moms.

For Sirius Euphemia was his mother in every law. The woman who loved him, who cared for him, who took care of him and protected him in the nights when the remains of torture were present in dreams... in nightmares. That woman had been a balm in his life, the maximum reference of goodness on Earth.

In Regulus' case, the love came in a beautiful package named Hope that gave him hope when he felt almost all was lost. She was his salvation. When he closes his eyes he can feel the warmth of his mom's gaze that in no way compared to the icy daggers Walburga would plunge into him.

They were there, newly married to the most beautiful people who could exist, not only physically but internally, in soul and mind. The Black brothers had a long road to reach the point where they perceived themselves worthy of those loves.

"I never would have imagined our fate, Sirius."

"Me neither, Reggie."

"All this peace felt so far away, happiness was only something I could dream of but I never imagined myself feeling it" he turned to look at Sirius' face.

"The darkness of Grimmauld Place, the screams of it... I didn't think we could ever leave them behind." He fell silent. "I shouldn't have left you with her, Reggie, I'm never going to be able to stop regretting that.”

"I must confess that at first I hated myself so much for that, I hated myself for not being enough for you to take me and get me out of that place" he sighed and turned his eyes forward to stare at the sea skimming the shore. "But then Remus came for me, he was there and he took me with him. He made me understand that I was worth it, that things were very difficult and complex for you too. He took me with him and then I met Mom. If you had taken me Hope didn't... We were with the people we should have been with at the time we should have been. You should stop regretting that because my life and your life would not have been the same. You wouldn't have Effie and I wouldn't have Hope. You wouldn't be James' brother and I wouldn't be Remus' brother. You wouldn't have married Remus and I wouldn't have married James. It happened exactly what was supposed to happen, when it was supposed to happen.”

"I still have a hard time understanding that we deserve all of this. Not because I feel we're not worth it but because I firmly believe they're all so fucking awesome."

"I know, I feel that way too.”

James appeared behind them accompanied by Remus who like them were wearing a white linen shirt and matching pants with necklaces made of wooden beads. Laughter accompanied the waves and the Blacks couldn't help the smiles on their faces.

Both Remus and James grabbed their partners' hands and pulled them with amusement into the sea. The crescent moon was so beautiful and bright that it painted the sea its color. The reflection of the beautiful moon was just the spot where the four of them decided they had gone far enough into the water.

They splashed some water on each other which made everyone have salt on their lips. They laughed and like magnets Regulus moved closer to James as Sirius moved closer to Remus and they kissed. On the shore the shouts of glee let out by Euphemia and Hope followed by Fleamont made them laugh out loud.

#marauders #remus lupin #james potter #regulus black #remus loves sirius #remus x sirius #sirius black #sirius orion black #jegulus #wolfstar #euphemia potter #hope lupin #the marauders #marauders fandom #marauders fanfiction #marauders fic #the black brothers #starchaser

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whatstruthgottodowithit · 3 months ago

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Because I Liked A Boy [Part One]

Fandom: Harry Potter [Marauders Era]

Pairing: James Potter x Regulus Black, James Potter x Lily Evans,

Characters: James Potter, Regulus Black, Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, Lily Evans, Barty Crouch Jr, Evan Rosier, Marlene McKinnon, Mary MacDonald, Peter Pettigrew, Fleamont Potter, Euphemia Potter,

Word Count: 6401

Rating: Mature

Summary: Everything’s derailing. Was only tryna hold you close while your heart was failing.

Tags/ Warnings: Hogwarts, summer Challenge, Writing Challenge, Song Fic, Marauders Era, Period Typical Attitudes, Coming Out, Abusive Households, Kisses, Angst, Fluff, Regulus is underage, Wedding, Engagements, Lost Love,

Notes: One day I'll write a happy jegulus fic but not today. Also I hated having to use lily as a barrier but it's what fit the song inso so x

Summer Challenge 2024 // Song Inspo

Part One // Part Two// Part Three

‘Well go on then.’

Regulus didn’t know how he’d gotten here, staring down at the furious face of the red head as she watched him with flaming green eyes. He’d been standing with Remus in the corner, neither one of them party animals and therefore birds of a feather nestled away by the wall where no one would notice them. Well no one but Sirius who had tried nigh on ten times to get his boyfriend to dance, cajoling his brother into encouragement too, and now Lily who was watching him incensed.

Except she wasn’t the only one. Behind her several party goers were watching them, the same anger not displayed against their features but rather curiosity at what had gotten the normally mild-mannered witch so riled. The only one who didn’t seem curious was James who stood behind her, looking unnaturally shy as he tugged on her sleeve and said, ‘Lil leave it.’

‘No!’ Lily said, shooting him a glare before she turned her sights back on Regulus, ‘if he has something to say he can say it to my face.’

‘Oh leave off will you,’ Sirius said as he pushed through the throng of onlookers, ‘he’s just a kid.’

‘Well if he’s big enough to spread nastiness about,’ Lily said angrily, making Sirius glance at his brother curiously for a second, apparently now conflicted about whatever this spat was about. Of late he’d been coming to Regulus’ defence without question but a lifelong loyalty to James Potter was not something he gave up lightly and it was clear whatever this matter was it was about James even if Regulus feigned innocence, pushing himself up from the wall as he asked, ‘what have I done?’

Lily scoffed and shook her head before she replied, ‘you said we shouldn’t get back together. Told him that I didn’t deserve him, filled his head with all sorts of rubbish.’

Regulus said nothing but he allowed his gaze to drift past her to James. He hadn't looked at the boy once, his hazel gaze fixed firmly at his feet as he allowed his ex-girlfriend, or whatever she was, to fling her accusations around. Accusations she was waiting to be confirmed or denied as she snapped, ‘well?’

‘Lil please just leave it,’ Remus said from his side, as always the voice of reason. And as always drowned out by a Black’s sense of righteousness.

‘Well it’s not untrue,’ Regulus said simply, folding his arms as he stared the girl down.

‘Reg,’ Sirius warned, his gaze flicking between them all but landing firmly on his brother who shrugged and said ‘well it’s not. Or did she not dump him to find herself?’

‘I had a lot going on,’ Lily said defensively.

‘More like you thought you could do better only when you got there you found there wasn’t much of a demand for uptight cows and turned tail-‘

‘Reg,’ Remus groaned but Lily wasn’t for relenting, coming closer as she yelled shrilly, ‘how dare you! You have no idea what you’re talking about! As a matter of fact it’s none of your business!’

‘It is when,’ Regulus started but he was cut off, watching as Lily’s nostrils flared, her freckled skin becoming patchy red in places as her anger grew.

‘When what?’ she demanded, ‘you don’t know anything about us. I mean what are you to James? Sirius’ little brother? Some mixed up school kid trying to make grown up friends? Is that it?’

Anyone would’ve thought she was demanding the answers of Regulus except she’d turned, watching James instead, the way Regulus had. James looked up when he felt her move, panic on his handsome face as he tried to scramble for an answer. Except he didn’t make a sound. He wasn’t one to hide from the spotlight and yet now with everyone watching him he didn’t speak.

Regulus looked at him, grey eyes boring into his face as he willed for him to speak up, to say something. But he didn’t speak.

And again Regulus wondered how he’d gotten here.

He supposed Lily was right. Up until this summer he hadn't been much to James, well any of them really. Love his brother as he might Sirius’ antics had put a strain on their relationship over the years as had his immediate found friendship with ‘the marauders’. It wasn’t until one drizzly day in May when he’d gotten a letter from his mother, one that spewed hate and bile having not one but two what she deemed ‘unfit’ sons, did Regulus know there was no going back. He’d spent six years trying to not be like his brother only to find they were two sides of the same coin and when he’d written to him telling him so Sirius had been more understanding that he could’ve asked for. He’d taken him in for the summer, of course his and Remus’ apartment wasn’t massive so it meant a month or so of kipping on the sofa, but it was a home filled with love and acceptance, which wasn’t something he’d ever really known.

He also had not known a group of people to spend so much time at the pub. Of course he couldn’t complain but seeing as Remus and Sirius’ route to their bedroom would cross his path it did mean he found himself disturbed most nights. Fortunately when they came in this time he wasn’t asleep, he was sat in the armchair, curled up with a blanket and a cup of tea as he read his book, and tried to block out the dream he’d woken from not long since, the lashes of his father’s belt still feeling raw on his ankles though there was no marks to be seen.

Only when they came through the door this time, stumbling in as always, they weren’t alone. Slouched in between them was a very limp James Potter, Regulus could tell even though his head was flopped forward as the messiness of his dark locks was a telltale sign.

‘Jesus he’s like a lead weight,’ Sirius grunted as they hauled him into the room, his feet barely making traction against the cream carpet.

‘Least we managed to apparate most of the way,’ Remus grunted as they flopped him down onto the couch, adjusting himself as James sprawled out on his back, ‘I wouldn’t have liked doing that the muggle way.’

‘Nah me neither,’ Sirius agreed as he shrugged off his jacket and flung it over the back of the couch though only then did he seem to realise Regulus was awake, watching the pair of them standing over the now snoring James, ‘oh sorry Reggie didn’t see you there.’

‘It’s fine,’ Regulus muttered, trying not to wince at the sound of his detested nickname, ‘what's up with him?’

‘Blotto,’ Remus said with a yawn.

‘Heartbrokens more like it,’ Sirius said, glancing at his friend with sympathy before he looked back to Regulus and said, ‘you don’t mind if he sleeps here tonight do you? He was too upset to go back to his flat what with them living together-‘

‘It’s fine,’ Regulus said, already able to feel the crick in his neck he’d have from sitting up all night.

‘Thanks mate,’ Sirius smiled, patting his brother on the shoulder as he headed to his bedroom. Remus moved around the room for a minute, taking James’ shoes and glasses off and procuring a bowl for him to be sick into if needed. Regulus pretended not to watch though he offered the other man a smile before he disappeared behind their bedroom door.

Once he was gone silence fell, the only thing to be heard James’ heavy drunken breathing and the turning of Regulus’ pages though admittedly they had slowed. He didn’t know why he was watching the boy; it wasn’t like he’d never met him before. He’d known of the infamous James Potter at school, though admittedly he’d kept his distance as Sirius was normally not far behind, and he’d met him a couple of times since landing on his brother’s doorstep, normally in passing as the pair headed for a night out.

Still his curiosity had been sparked, not because they'd been out drinking but rather because Sirius had said he was heartbroken. Of course Regulus knew about Lily. After all, even from Slytherin house one couldn’t escape James Potter's infatuation with the redhead. If anything it had amused Regulus to see self-assured Potter put in his place here and there, at least he had been until she’d caved in sixth year and the pair had started dating. Or at least had been dating up to now it seemed.

‘I can feel you watching me you know,’ the boy grumbled, his eyes still closed though it was enough to make Regulus freeze like a deer in headlights. James shifted, cracking one eye open and watching Regulus who looked away and muttered, ‘I wasn’t watching you.’

‘It’s alright. But just so you know I normally charge a galleon for people to come and marvel at my beauty,’ James yawned as he rolled over pushing himself up until he was sitting before he peeled his jumper up over his head, causing his hair to fall into disarray even further. Regulus rolled his eyes at the comment though he couldn’t stop himself from looking at the boy, even though his knuckles were almost white holding his book, begging him to return to the page. He almost wished he had as when James looked up and caught him looking again he smiled and said, ‘sorry if I woke you up.’

‘You didn’t,’ Regulus said, the memories of his nightmare creeping into his brain though he forced it out, ‘I was awake...I was reading.’

‘Right yeah,’ James said, flopping his head back against the couch as he looked towards the fireplace. It was unlit, old, burned wood laying in the hearth but he watched it as if there were flames dancing around to mesmerise him. And just like the dreams had crept in on Regulus the thoughts of heartbreak appeared on James’ face as he came to.

And though he knew he probably shouldn’t, he wasn’t much of a talker himself, he found himself asking, ‘are you okay?’

‘Not really,’ James said honestly, tearing his gaze away from the fire with a sniffle.

‘Do you…do you want to talk about it?’ Regulus asked, scolding himself for doing so. What was he going to talk to James Potter about? He barely knew the man, not to mention it wasn’t as though Regulus’ love life was anything noteworthy. And it wasn’t as if he could offer any advice about girls. Fortunately James shook his head and realising that was a way to get away Regulus nodded and stood up, slinking the blanket onto the floor as he asked, ‘want a cup of tea?’

‘Tea?’ James asked.

‘Yeah, Sirius always used to make me a cup of tea when I was upset but I was making one anyway,’ he said, feeling red tinge his ears at how caring he sounded. James yawned, ‘sure go on then.’

At that Regulus darted into the kitchen, thankful of the wall now between them which hid his crimson cheeks from view. He didn’t know why it embarrassed him so much. Then again he wasn’t exactly accustomed to being nice, not overtly anyway. His friends were more of an eye roll and scathing wit kind of vibe rather than the unfathomable enthusiasm and gentle teasing his brother’s friends seemed to thrive in. Though maybe it was just because he’d brought up a topic James would rather not speak of and as someone who was used to the ‘stiff upper lip’ he'd made an error by bringing it up. Then again maybe it was the way that seeing an upset James had tugged at his heartstrings, the way he’d wanted to do something, anything, that would make him feel better.

Regulus brushed it aside as he made two cups of tea, one black and the other strong but milky with enough sugar to stand a spoon up in it in anticipation of fending off the other boy’s hangover. When he appeared back in the living room James was sitting up near his side of the couch, reading the back of Regulus’ book though he placed it down as the boy appeared, reaching out to take the cup from him as Regulus muttered, ‘here.’

‘Cheers,’ James said, taking a small sip.

‘It’s alright,’ Regulus said as he took a seat in his chair and took a sip himself. They were quiet for a moment and again Regulus felt the need to speak, something he never normally felt and so he offered, ‘I er, I looked for biscuits but I couldn’t find any.’

‘It’s alright,’ James shrugged.

‘Yeah…I guess I just fancied a custard cream,’ Regulus said, his throat drying up as James looked at him inquisitively, ‘they’re my favourite.’

James nodded and looked away, taking another small sip as Regulus tapped his fingers around the rim of his mug. It was ceramic and thick, unlike the China tea set his mother had which he had to admit made the difference. He missed that tea set. He missed drinking tea in the garden on a summer's afternoon. And as always to his surprise he missed his mother, as twisted as it was to miss someone who no longer wanted you.

‘She dumped me,’ James mumbled, snapping Regulus back from thoughts of afternoon tea in the back garden of Grimmauld place.

‘Oh,’ Regulus said, ‘I’m sorry.’

‘S’alright,’ James sniffed, analysing the cup before him as though that should be his focus even though he’d been the one to bring it up. Regulus realised he could probably leave it there but the hurt in the boy's voice made him want to hear more. After all, if he heard more maybe he could fix it.

‘Did she say why?’ he probed.

‘We’re too busy for a relationship. It’s not like it was at school. She wants to find herself,’ James said, parroting the words rather than speaking them himself as evidenced by the scorn in his voice, ‘just think she was sick of me to be honest.’

‘Well you’re not so bad,’ Regulus said. He’d been biting his lip, holding in the snark that was destined to break free from him if he didn’t, but at hearing the downtrodden way James spoke of himself he felt compelled to refute though he didn’t know why. He knew of James Potter, it was hard not to, and though he’d never gone out of his way to know him well he knew one thing, he wasn’t that bad of a guy. James looked up as he spoke, ‘even if you do stumble in at one in the morning and wake me up.’

‘Thanks,’ he chuckled.

‘It’s alright,’ Regulus smiled softly.

‘And er sorry about that,’ James said with a grin, ‘maybe if I make it up to you I’ll go from not so bad to fairly decent eh?’

‘Maybe,’ Regulus agreed.

After that the pair settled down to sleep, whatever booze was still in James’ system combining with his sugary beverages and pulling him fast into slumber, only when Regulus awoke late in the morning he was alone. He had been right about the chair, the crick in his neck was so stiff but as he spotted the jumper still strewn across the back of the sofa he couldn’t help but smile, the flutter of butterflies in his stomach at the sight of it. He tried to ignore it, in fact when Sirius, Remus and James returned from James’ flat, after having gathered some belongings for a temporary stay, Regulus made himself scarce, opting to spend time in the boys’ bedroom or out on the tiny balcony. He only reappeared when it was nearing ready for bed, ready to take root in his designated armchair since James had somehow wangled the couch full time.

When he did he found Sirius looking in the mirror as he ran his fingers through his hair in the hopes to get it looking naturally windswept. Remus however didn’t seem bothered about his appearance as he was too busy yawning as he tried to lace up his boots.

‘Going somewhere?’ Regulus asked as he took a seat, eyeing the couple and then James who was practically vibrating with enthusiasm as he stood opposite.

‘Pub,’ James said happily.

‘Pub,’ Remus answered at the same time, far less enthusiastic.

‘You can come if you want,’ James said though Regulus ignored him, opting instead to ask, ‘didn't you go last night?’

‘Yeah but someone said we’d go again,’ Remus said, shooting Sirius a dirty look.

‘Well it’s better than moping around here all night,’ Sirius said, moving towards James and pinching his cheek, ‘can't stand it when he mopes.’

‘Gerroff,’ James grunted, his excitement waning just an ounce, ‘M’not moping. Besides, it was your idea too. We don't have to go.’

‘We want to,’ Sirius said, sharing a serious look with Remus, ‘right Moony?’

‘Right. Let’s get this show on the road then,’ Remus agreed standing up and looking towards Regulus, ‘sure you don’t want to tag on?’

‘No thanks,’ Regulus said, relieved to have some time to himself.

‘Suit yourself,’ Sirius said, ‘see you later.’

‘Yeah later,’ Regulus said as the three walked to the door though as Sirius and Remus disappeared, walking down the stairs outside the flat James stopped, glancing to make sure they were away before he dashed to his backpack and pulled something out tossing them to Regulus who caught them smoothly, twirling the yellow packet around to see what he was holding.

‘Custard creams,’ James said with a smile, ‘as penance for waking you up.’

‘Last night or tonight?’ Regulus asked, feeling his stomach flutter as James smiled.

‘Well let's see what happens,’ James winked, and without another word he flounced out leaving Regulus looking at the packet of biscuits and trying to dispel the fizzy feeling in his stomach.

Following that first night Regulus did try to maintain his distance from James. He had his own friends, he didn't need his brothers too, but it was hard to do when you shared a makeshift bedroom with someone. In fact over the next couple of weeks they fell into an unspoken routine. With jobs yet to start following their departure from school they were all still on borrowed time and spending their days lolling around the flat and their nights in the pub. Regulus didn’t attend but every night when James came home, in various states of inebriation, he found himself waiting up for him, ready to spend ten minutes to two hours just speaking with him. He didn’t know why, what drew him to those conversations but somehow they felt mutually beneficial. Like whatever was said was confined to them, not to be mentioned again or used against one another in the real world. Their own little bubble. Regulus knew what it was. Two broken hearted people trying to hold one another close in the hopes of keeping themselves together but at times he found himself wondering if it was just that. When James looked at him a little too long or he caught himself mesmerised by the way James spoke. He thought there may be something more.

Of course he only thought those things in the dead of night. In daylight it never seemed the same, namely because in the day his brother was usually sitting not far away and would surely notice him ogling his best friend. Which was why Regulus was taken off guard one July morning when Sirius appeared from his bedroom and decreed the pair of them spend the day together.

‘You want us to go on a day out together?’ Regulus implored, ‘why?’

‘Not a day out together. I just want you both out of the flat for the day,’ Sirius said, rolling his eyes.

‘Why?’ Regulus grumbled.

‘Moony’s not well and I want to make him feel better,’ Sirius said, silencing James with a hand as he said, ‘and no you can't help. Not with what I’ve got planned anyway.’

Rather than being scarred for life Regulus had promptly made himself scarce though he’d only found himself down the street before he felt a presence by his side and looked up to find James smiling down on him.

‘Thought we could both find something to do,’ James said, ‘beats trudging around London on our own.’

Regulus hadn't been able to refuse, even if he had he doubted James would’ve heard him with the amount of ideas he had been rhyming off as they strolled the streets of London. To Regulus’ surprise though they stayed away from the alley opting to spend the morning in a muggle café before wandering to the local park. They wandered around the large pond it held for a while before taking a seat on the grassy knoll next to it and watching the ducks swim by. There wasn’t much talking whilst they sat there, as if they’d run out of things to say without Sirius or Remus as a buffer or that their normal topics of conversation were somehow off limits in the daylight.

Though after a while he could feel James watching him and when he turned he was, his arms resting back behind him as he watched the younger boy closely. Regulus turned away self-consciously as if he could fend off whatever was going to come from James mouth though he could sense it coming.

‘So,’ James started, ‘are you looking forward to school?’

‘No,’ Regulus said dully, turning his attention to plucking grass from the ground.

‘Why not?’ James asked, ‘it’s your last year isn't it? I mean the exams are shit but it’s a fun one.’

‘Yeah real fun when everyone knows you're staying at your brother’s because your mums disowned you both for being as bent as a hundred galleon coin.’

‘They’ll not care,’ James reasoned, sitting up and watching Regulus. His face was stoic and poised but he could see the way his lip quivered before he muttered, ‘it’s gossip. Of course they’ll care.’

‘Yeah I guess,’ James said, watching him sadly. The pair fell quiet with Regulus staring out at the ducks on the pond, swimming gracefully along to murky water, whilst James watched him. He knew he probably didn’t have a right to ask, that it was none of his business, but he had found this weird understanding with Regulus that he hadn't expected. He didn’t know if it was an instilled politeness within the boy that forced him to continue the conversation whenever James started, which granted was so frequent his mother had once remarked he’d be able to start a conversation in an empty room, or whether he’d come to like James the way James had come to like Regulus. But whatever it was he found that whenever he asked a question Regulus would answer it. Whatever burden he offloaded he’d listen to. Whatever curiosity he proffered would be met with a smile and an eye roll but accepted all the same. James liked it and, curious, he found himself asking another question.

‘How did you know?’ he asked, causing grey eyes to glance in his direction, dark brows fusing together as he tried to get a hold on what James was asking. James could practically see his train of thought before he replied, ‘that I was gay?’

‘Yeah,’ James said, pushing himself up until he was sitting beside him, an understanding yet curious expression on his face. Regulus tensed and shuffled under the scrutiny.

‘Why do you want to know?’ Regulus asked quietly.

‘Dunno,’ James shrugged, ‘just curious I guess.’

Regulus could feel his heart hammering in his chest. He’d never really spoken about it before, his friends had assumed but not pried and besides one tense conversation with Sirius it’d sort of faded into the background. It was just a part of him. Like being a Black was. Not something he wanted scrutinised and poked at. Except it was James who was asking. James, with his carefree, unbelievably understanding attitude to everyone. James who was watching him closely, a sympathetic smile on his plump lips.

‘Guess I’ve always known,’ Regulus uttered after a moment.

‘That’s what Moony says,’ James sighed, ‘well he said he didn’t know know until we all went girl mad. But Pads said it came out of the blue. Like it was about Moony not boys you know. Is that what it’s like for you?’

‘Well considering I’ve never had a Moony I don’t think so,’ Regulus said, his heart still thudding.

‘Yeah I guess,’ James said, looking as though he was deep in thought as the furrowing of his brow caused his glasses to slip further down his nose, ‘so how do you know?’

‘How did you know you liked girls,’ Regulus challenged, though he wasn’t sure he wanted to hear it. It was one thing to hear about all the ways his relationship had gone wrong and all the things he no longer liked about Lily; it was another to hear what he actually liked.

‘Fair point,’ James said, ‘but maybe I don’t. Maybe no one does.’

‘What?’ Regulus asked, confused.

‘Well Pads thought he liked girls but what if it doesn’t work like that. What if you like what you’re told to like until you’re proven wrong,’ James said, looking up at the boy though as he noticed the gentle drop of Regulus’ jaw he shifted rubbing the back of his neck. But Regulus persisted.

‘Wait so you think I’m gonna kiss some girl and be straight,’ Regulus scoffed, trying not to feel hurt. Was it possible James was only okay with being gay when it came to his best friends. When it was Sirius only having eyes for Remus and not any boy that walked by? Was it possible James Potter was just as narrow minded and stuffy as most pure-blooded wizards seemed to be? Regulus prayed that wasn’t true but given the way James became shifty and moved away from him he felt his stomach churn.

‘Never mind,’ James said, standing up and dusting the grass from his backside, ‘let's head back, they're bound to be done by now.’

‘Eugh don’t,’ Regulus said as he climbed up, simultaneously grateful for the distraction and abhorred at the idea of what Sirius was up to.

‘Let’s just hope they stuck to the bedroom,’ James said, offering him a cheeky grin and darting out of his way as Regulus went to shove him.

Fortunately Remus and Sirius were both up and in the living room, fully dressed, when the pair got back to the flat. And though Remus seemed tired they seemed happy to relive James’ retelling of their day out as they watched TV. However as they got to the duck pond, James conveniently left out the conversation they’d had which only made it blare in Regulus’ mind and so for distraction he stayed out on the balcony reading once more until it got far too cold to bear. When he did get inside however Remus was curled up on the couch, his head in the lap of Sirius, who was watching TV, albeit by trying to navigate his head around James who was standing in front of the screen.

‘Please Pads,’ James whined.

‘No,’ Sirius said.

‘It’s one night,’ James reasoned.

‘I don’t mind,’ Remus said, though he barely got the words out of his mouth before he yawned.

‘We’ve been out all bloody week,’ Sirius said, ‘Moony wants a night off.’

‘And he’s said you can go without him!’ James challenged, ‘or can you two not be apart for ten minutes?’

‘Reverse psychology isn’t going to work on him. You’ll just put him in a bad mood,’ Regulus said as he slipped into his chair, earning himself a glare from James and a wry smile from Sirius who knew he was right.

‘Look one night off isn’t the end of the world,’ Sirius reasoned, ‘and nothings stopping you from going out you know.’

‘I can't go out on my own, that's just sad,’ James pouted, folding his arms across him.

‘Ask Pete?’ Remus reasoned.

‘He’s going on holiday tomorrow,’ James said, ‘he never lasts long anyway.’

‘Well take Reg if you’re so hard up,’ Sirius said.

‘Excuse me?’ Regulus scoffed.

‘Pads he’s underage,’ Remus said, though the way he glanced at the younger boy signalled he was trying to get him out of going rather than a disapproval of underage drinking.

‘And?’ Sirius said rolling his eyes, ‘we got served underage he’ll be fine. And it’ll stop him from moaning.’

‘Do I get a say in this?’ Regulus asked looking between the three of them only that didn’t last long as James was in his space immediately, pulling him up and grabbing his coat as he said, ‘nope. You’re coming whether you like it or not.’

Needless to say, Regulus' first time in a muggle club didn’t go down all that well. He had not minded the pub, that was easy going and James actually spoke to him then. He’d even been so happy to have someone come out with him he insisted on buying every drink. Only the more he’d drunk the more boisterous he’d gotten. Their conversations turned to drunken nonsense with James intent on bringing anyone they saw into the group. That was how they’d ended up at the club, Regulus stood in the corner nursing a gin and tonic as he watched James move from girl to girl throwing out cheesy chat up line after cheesy chat up line with unmovable confidence. Regulus watched them fawning over him, the dorky self-assurance he had a charm for ninety percent of them. The way it was for Regulus in every moment but this one. After an hour of watching him Regulus could take no more and so as another girl sashayed back to her giggling friends he presented himself at James’ side. He looked confused to see him, as if he’d forgotten they were even there together but he smiled at him nonetheless, a smile that dimmed as Regulus said, ‘I’m going home.’

‘What?’ James asked, ‘you can't.’

‘Why not? So I can sit and watch you flirt with every girl who walks past,’ Regulus said rolling his eyes, ‘no thanks.’

‘You can’t just go,’ James protested.

‘I just want to go to bed,’ Regulus sighed, ‘I’ll see you back at the flat.’

And before James could utter another protestation he was weaving through the mass of sweaty bodies until he was finally out into the small reception area only before he got out the door he was dragged into an alcove, club goers and security moving past the pair of them as if they weren’t there. James looked flushed, his cheeks tinged with pink and his hair pushed back from his forehead as he looked down at him and said, ‘Reg don’t go.’

‘Why not?’ Regulus said.

‘Cos I don’t want you to,’ James said.

‘So you’ve got someone to drag your arse home when-‘

And then his snappy retort was cut off because he was up against the wall, James’ body against his as he kissed him fiercely. Regulus went limp allowing himself to be kissed before James pulled back with a small smile on his face, that self-assured nature never failing him, ‘told you I didn’t want you to go.’

They hadn't spent long in the club after that, a grimy club in east London was alright for a first kiss Regulus supposed but he wanted James to himself and so they quickly headed back to the flat. And where their nights had been chalked with talking it turned to more, the same give and take they'd had before as they learned more about one another, shared more than they ever had before. It wasn’t easy. It was new territory for the pair of them and it felt like if they spoke about it it’d all come crashing down, the intangible turned disastrous. So it lived between them in stolen moments and knowing glances.

That’s how Regulus came to be lying in his brother's bed, James’ head in his lap as he played with his hair. It was baking, the sun blaring through the windows and radiating the room but Regulus had no desire to move. That was coming soon enough, he was due back at Hogwarts in a matter of weeks which meant an end or at least a change to whatever this was.

‘You’re quiet,’ James said, turning to rest his chin on his arm that was splayed across Regulus’ thigh.

‘Just thinking,’ Regulus said, running his fingers through his hair.

‘About?’ James asked.

‘Me going back to school,’ Regulus admitted, trying to ignore the lump in his throat.

‘It’s ages off yet,’ James said quietly.

‘Two weeks,’ Regulus corrected.

‘So?’ James murmured.

‘So…’ Regulus hesitated, ‘so what if you forget about me?’

‘Bollocks,’ James said, rolling his eyes.

‘James,’ Regulus mumbled but he wasn't listening but sitting up and pulling Regulus with him until they were face to face, that self-assured smile on his face.

‘How could I?’ James said, ghosting his finger along the razor-sharp line of Regulus’ jaw.

‘Because you’ll be here living a proper life and I’ll just be a kid at school,’ Regulus mumbled, again amazed at how open he could be when it came to him, ‘it’s not even like anyone knows.’

‘You said you didn’t want to tell anyone,’ James reasoned.

‘Yeah because…well it’s different for me,’ Regulus said.

‘Why?’

‘Because I’m not…you’re my first everything and I’m…’ he didn’t finish fearing the look in James’ eyes if he mentioned the word rebound would confirm the fears he’d been having.

‘Well no, you’re not my first, well you kind of are in a way,’ James said, interlacing his fingers with Regulus, smiling as he murmured, ‘but you are my favourite…and I guess I didn’t know I could love someone like this.’

‘James,’ Regulus mumbled. He wanted to say it back. But he couldn’t make the words come, not before there was a jangle of keys in the front door spurring them into action and breaking them apart.

After that he didn’t really know how to bring it up and as the deadline for Regulus to leave crept closer he felt as though to utter it, to speak it into existence would only make it harder to leave. Because he didn’t want to leave. He wanted to lock himself away and stay with James forever no more so than when he felt him pull away, their time together curtailed by Sirius’ new need to see his brother as much as humanly possible, even going so far as to host a party before he was destined to return to Hogwarts. The night before the dreaded get together was the last moment alone he’d gotten with James, the pair of them huddled on the couch, the tv on in the background, murmuring to itself as James said, ‘I er, stopped by flat today.’

‘Your flat?’ Regulus asked.

‘Yeah,’ James said casually, ‘picked up some stuff.’

‘Was Lily there?’ Regulus asked, hating the tightness that came into his voice just as much as he hated the way James shifted uncomfortably.

‘Yeah,’ James said, ‘she um, asked if she could come to the party. Seeing as everyone else is.’

‘What did you say?’ Regulus asked though he was sure he knew the answer. James Potter was not one to leave a person out, no matter the circumstances.

‘Well I said I’d ask,’ James mumbled, ‘but it’s okay by me.’

‘You don’t care?’ Regulus asked, unable to see how weeks of moping over the girl had suddenly transpired into not being bothered though he hoped that was due to his handiwork.

‘No,’ James said, ‘we erm, talked it out.’

‘What did she say?’ Regulus asked.

‘She said she was sorry,’ James said, ‘I said it was okay.’

‘That was all she said?’ Regulus pressed.

‘Yeah,’ James muttered. Regulus was watching him closely but in a manner unlike himself James wasn’t looking at him as he spoke, keeping his eyes on the TV as if he was avoiding the scrutiny. As if he was avoiding Regulus entirely. After a summer of nothing but raw honesty it was unsettling for Regulus to feel so out of his depth. He was sure there was something more to it, James wasn’t exactly hard to read, but he didn’t feel as though he was allowed to press on. The fact that he had withheld himself the past week meaning he would be a hypocrite to demand answers. Instead he swallowed the lump in his throat and said, ‘well if you don’t mind it’s okay with me.’

And that was it. Whatever James had held back leaving him here, thinking of everything that had brought them to this moment. It all passed through his mind like a blur. And yet now the only thing he could think of now was the way James was looking at him, guilt in his eyes as he cleared his throat and said, ‘she’s right.’

‘What?’ Regulus whispered.

‘It’s nothing to do with you,’ James said, not meeting his eye, ‘it’s none of your business.’

‘Well sorry I interfered,’ Regulus said tightly, whatever snappy quip he could offer dying on his tongue as he realised it would do him no favours, not when everyone who was watching the interaction was bound to be on their side. After all, what was Regulus to them? A sharp-tongued brat. Sirius’ kid brother. A reason to come to a party and nothing more.

And as it seemed from the way James looked at him, his hazel eyes large and apologetic, now just a memory. Nothing more.

‘Yeah well in future keep your nose out of other people's relationships,’ Lily snapped.

‘Alright you’ve said your piece,’ Sirius said, getting between them as Regulus shrunk back against the wall, ‘he’s said he’s sorry.’

‘Pads is right everyone back to dancing,’ Remus said, stepping in front of the boy and blocking him from view as he spied the glassy look in his eyes. Regulus didn’t thank him. He barely made a noise as he slipped into the bedroom and closed the door behind him, locking it with his wand before he sank to the ground and allowed the tears to fall.

#my writing #hp #marauders #jegulus #james potter fic #regulus black fic #james potter x regulus black #starchaser #marauders era #remus lupin #sirius black #harry potter fic #because i like a boy #summer challenge

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iwriteasfotini · 3 months ago

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Jegulus Excerpt

My third Jegulus days celebration post. I know it was yesterday, but is there really such a thing as too much Jegulus? Nope. Another excerpt from Book 3, written from James’ POV. It stands alone from the excerpts I shared for day one and day two and is from Chapter XXI. More budding Starchaser for your entertainment.

Showered and changed, the team left the locker room arm in arm. There were still many people milling about the lawn, as it was such a lovely day. And soon the team was scattered among friends who wanted to recap the match. James looked to the lake, where he thought his mates were most likely to be. All three were there, Remus skimming stones while Sirius and Peter lay in the grass. But they hadn’t spotted James yet, so he took another sweeping look around the grounds and saw what he was looking for, a shadow shifting near the locker room entrances.

He doubled back, if anyone asked he’d say he had left something behind. He hustled back to the locker room, and slipped through the door. And James should have been surprised, but he wasn’t to find Regulus standing in the middle of the room, hands in his pockets. He was decked out in Slytherin colors, and the emerald green contrasted wonderfully with his pale complexion and dark hair.

Before James could say so much as “hey” Regulus began speaking very fast, “I know I shouldn’t be here. I know you are my brother’s best friend. I know you hate me and the rest of my house. I just wanted to say I’ve enjoyed watching you fly this season. You are really good James. And you are a team player.”

James could tell Regulus was rambling out of nerves. So James cut him off, “well I train really hard. You should come fly with me. Not like you need the practice.”

Regulus bit his lip and smiled sheepishly. James had rarely seen Regulus show an emotion that wasn’t disdain or aloofness. He had a really nice smile, and it reached all the way to his eyes, just like Sirius’ did. James’ stomach did a little flip and he felt some color creep into his cheeks. Thank goodness his dark skin didn’t show blushes as easily, what would Regulus think of him?

“You had better enjoy the Quidditch Cup while you have it, because next year we are going to be wiping the floor with you.”

“Oh really,” James took two steps forward. “I don��t know, the Slytherin’s looked pretty tame this year. Maybe you all have lost your touch. And for as little as I’ve seen you training, who’s to say you are even as good as I remember.”

“I’m excellent,” Regulus replied, eyes narrowing. But James shrugged.

“I’ll believe it when I see it.”

Regulus pursed his lips, which were slightly less full than Sirius’.

“Fine, Wednesday morning. I’ll come fly with you, as long as -”

“Regulus,” James held up his hand, “I’m taking your secrets to the grave. You can trust me, yeah?” They stared at each other, then James watched a smile creep across Regulus’ face. James smirked back, and to keep the situation from getting any more awkward, he spit into his right hand and held it out to Regulus, who did not hesitate to mimic the gesture. They shook with a squelch.

And when neither of them had let go after a solid ten seconds of shaking, James looked at their hands and said, “so, um, we gonna stand here all day or…”

Regulus went crimson, and he dropped James’ hand.

“Wednesday,” James called after him as Regulus made to leave out the back door of the locker room. Regulus nodded and gave him a small smile. James stood in the empty locker room and then put his hands into his pockets, palm still slick with spit he didn’t feel the urge to wipe off.

…

You can find more info on this series in my pinned post. Unfortunately, this is from Book 3, which is fully written but doesn’t have an announced posting date as of yet. But it’s coming to AO3, I promise! On Sunday I'm announcing the title, POV, and posting date for Book 2 in my Weekly Update.

#marauders #fanfic #james potter #regulus black #harry potter #marauders era #our love is written in the stars #jegulus #starchaser #sunseeker #year three #james POV #james potter loves regulus black #regulus x james

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regulus-books · 1 year ago

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part one | part two

wc: 1k+

warnings: brief mention of regulus wanting to kill himself in the first paragraph, fighting, tell me if i missed something

Regulus wants to bash his face on the table until he reaches death. In front of him sits four unfinished assignments in potions. Regulus thinks, maybe, if he gets up and walks around a little, he'll feel more motivated to work. So, he packs up all his quills and homework and walks towards the door.

But at this moment, he doesn't move. He made it this far, but his legs won't move anymore. His eyes caught on someone, someone with curly brown hair, tanned skin, glasses, and the most beautiful smile he has ever seen in his life. James. James wouldn't normally make his breath hitch, no, normally Regulus would pretend not to notice James. Pretend that they weren't dating for almost a year, he'd pretend that it didn't hurt as much as it did when he inevitably chose her. Her. The girl sitting next to him as of now. Her red hair pulled back into a messy ponytail, her skin glowing. Who couldn't glow sitting next to the sun?

He's staring. James is looking at Regulus. Regulus quickly turns away, back to his table. Why was he even leaving in the first place? He doesn't want to know anymore, he wants to crawl up in Sirius' room and cry. He wants Remus to sit on the common room couch, with Regulus' feet in his lap, and he wants him to read. He wants Lily to go back to hating James, he wants her back with Mary. He wishes he wasn't here. He wishes he wasn't here especially when he feels someone come up behind him and pull one of his curls. He wants to be gone when that beautiful someone sits next to him, brushing through Regulus hair with their fingers. He almost forgets all of that, he almost curls into his touch, almost crawls into his lap and hugs him.

Then Regulus snaps out of it, and swats his hand away. "What do you want, Potter?" Regulus scowls at the table as if it did something to him.

"You cut your hair." James smiles, watching every emotion pass Regulus' face. Sadness, anger, emptiness.

"Astute observation, now can I get back to my homework." Regulus motions to his bag.

"I missed you being mean to me." Regulus nearly breaks down there.

"Leave, Potter. Your girlfriend is over there."

"Potter?" James' eyes flash with something Regulus cannot understand.

"That is your last name, is it not? Or did you take hers?" James' eyebrows knit tightly together, and he places a hand on Regulus' shoulder.

"We aren't together, Reg. How could we be, when you are right here?" Regulus almost laughs.

"Well, I'm not leaving. You guys can go off somewhere else to snog." Regulus stands up, but James follows closely behind. He grabs Regulus' forearm and tugs him closer.

"Regulus, I love you. I have always loved you, I never wanted Lily."

"That is such bullshit! You are with her right now!"

"Yeah because I can't be with you! It's clear you don't want me." James drops his hands away from Regulus, one of them runs through his hair, the other pushes up his golden glasses.

"I don't want you? You are the only person who I've ever been with James! I haven't been with anyone else in the past 6 months because of you! You've ruined dating for me, because now I just feel like a filthy bedwarmer. So there. Blame it all on me, but it was not my fault we broke up. Go off and cry to Lily." Regulus leaves the library in tears as he finds his way off to his brothers room. He knocks loudly on the door the moment he gets there, which is quickly answered by his elder brother, who immediately ushers him inside.

"What did he say, mon petit?" Sirius strokes Regulus' hair out of his face.

"He said it was clear that I don't want to be with him." Regulus rubs his eyes until they burn.

"Well, that's not true is it, darling?"

"Non." Regulus sees Remus hiding behind his curtain, "Come out, Wolfy." Remus snickers, he knows Regulus means no ill intent from the nickname. He crawls out of his sheets and sits next to Sirius.

"What's wrong, Reg?"

"I miss him, guys. I don't want to, but I do. I miss him even when he came back so many hours late, I miss him crawling into bed with me and kissing my cheek. I miss leaving him notes when I left. I miss him." Regulus can't stop the tears falling down his face. Sirius frown and continues to stroke his hair.

"Talk to him, babe. He can't know how you feel unless you talk to him. He loves you, he doesn't know how to tell you."

"That's just it Sirius, he told me he misses me, and that he loves me." James' words seem to echo through Regulus' mind.

"How about I go grab him, and you two can talk. How does that sound?" Regulus reluctantly nods. "Go up to his dorm, love. We'll send him up."

When Regulus enters the dorm, its like deja vu, but much messier. Regulus looks around the room, seeing everything that was there before. Except one thing. Regulus' beanie rests on James' pillow, or rather the one that belonged to Regulus all of those months ago.

James walks into his dorm no more than 5 minutes later, his glasses falling down the bridge of his nose, and his face flushed red. "Hi, Reg." He says, out of breath, and Regulus nearly laughs.

"Hi, James. Did you run here?"

"I'm so sorry, Reg, I'm sorry." James says, walking forward and taking Regulus' hand in his.

"I wanna know why you always were so late home, James." Regulus leads James to the table, tightening his grip around James' hand.

"To be completely honest with you, Regulus, I don't remember," James shakes his head, "All I know is I regretted it, and still do. I regret not spending those hours with you. Playing chess, reading a book. Well, you reading a book, me watching you. I regret not talking to you, and I love you. And I loved you. Please, Reg, give me another chance." James grabs Regulus' other hand as well, swiping his thumb back and forth.

"Don't beg, James. I wish you could've told me sooner, I would've fell back in your arms." Regulus smiles softly at James.

"I'm sorry, Regulus. I'm sorry for fighting with you in the library too, I just didn't know what to say. You aren't just a bedwarmer to me, or anyone, Reg. You are so much more than that. You are beautiful and sarcastic. You are so smart and talented. I haven't been able to function without you, Reg."

"Shush, James, I wanna forget about it. Is that okay with you?"

"Yes."

"Good," Regulus leans across the small table and presses his lips to James' soft ones, letting go of his hand and putting it in his hair. "I love you too."

So, James never is late again, in fact, he makes sure he's always at least 5 minutes early.

@ashywashy1240

masterlist / request

#regulus books #jegulus #james x regulus #james potter #regulus black #marauders #marauders era #regulus and james #gay #lgbtq+#gay wizards

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samynnad102687 · 1 year ago

Text

Marauderstober Oct 5th

Jegulus-James and Black Cat Reggie Cuddles

1344 words

Jegulus- Black Cat Reggie & James Cuddles

James was sitting on the couch in the living room of Potter Manor while a flurry of activity happened around him. He was in his own little world and didn’t want to listen to whatever Dumbledore had to say. It was probably more of ‘they knew the risks or I’m sorry we lost them but it was a necessary sacrifice for the greater good of the war’. James was tired of the war and just wanted to take all of his loved ones and run until it was over. He didn’t even care anymore.

They had already lost so many people, those who were friends and those that he barely knew. They had ‘lost’ Regulus last year, only for Dumbledore to tell them that he made the sacrifice to go into the cave but it was okay because they got the Horcrux. It was fucking bullshit. James was getting better at pretending around Dumbledore and so far he was none the wiser. When he first told them about Regulus, Sirius went off on a tangent and James just collapsed on the floor and cried.

Now, they know the truth. Regulus showed up at Potter Manor the same day that Dumbledore told them that he was dead. Needless to say, James and Sirius proceeded to lose their collective minds when they walked into the house and found Regulus sitting on the couch.

As Dumbledore headed for the floo, Leo, James’ black cat, jumped up onto his lap and nudged his hand until James started to pet him absentmindedly. Everyone else who didn’t live in Potter Manor left a few minutes later and Sirius plopped down on the couch next to James. He reached out and scratched Leo behind the ears before he pulled his hand back quickly to avoid getting scratched.

“You little shit,” Sirius complained as he rubbed his hand. He wasn’t quick enough.

“What did you expect to happen, Pads?” James laughed lightly.

“It’s not my fault he has to transform every time someone comes over,” Sirius huffed as he crossed his arms over his chest like a petulant child.

“Considering, you are the one who told Dumbledore that he could have the meetings here when I was out on a mission, it kind of is,” James shrugged as Regulus curled up in James’ lap and hissed at his brother.

“Well, everyone is gone now,“ Sirius said slowly. “You can change back now, Reg.”

James knew that Regulus wouldn’t change back before he was absolutely positive that no one else was going to show up at Potter Manor. They had talked about it one night when neither of them could sleep and James couldn’t blame him. It was bad enough that everyone assumed he was a good-for-nothing Deatheater, even if Dumbledore had told them that he was a spy for the Order the whole time. Some of the Order didn’t understand or didn’t care that he was forced into serving Voldemort. James knew the second he saw the mark and he promised that he would never leave Regulus to deal with it on his own.

“Whatever, I just don’t see why he still acts like he hates me. It’s not like I made him choose to fake his death,” Sirius continued after he figured out that Regulus wasn’t going to change back.

“You’ll have to ask him later, Pads,” James shrugged as he scratched Regulus behind the ears in the same spot that Sirius had tried earlier and Regulus started to purr.

Sirius saw this and put a hand over his heart in mock offence before storming off to find Remus. James tried to hold back his laughter at his dramatics but it didn’t help that Regulus had moved to snuggle in the crook of his neck and he was ticklish.

“You really do like annoying him, don’t you, love?” James asked after he was able to calm down some more.

Regulus looked at him with his storm grey eyes and James could see him smiling with them before nudging into him some more to say ‘Of course’. It made James smile, big and bright. It didn’t matter what form Regulus chose to be in when they were cuddling. There were perks to both. As a cat, he was so soft and made the most precious sounds. James had had a cat when he was younger. Unfortunately, she passed away when he was still in school. Regulus was better, even though he did love Cleo.

When Regulus cuddled as a human, James knew all of the secret spots to make him squirm until he punched James lightly and glared at him. He had the same glare as a cat though. When James looked at the clock, he noticed that it was almost nine in the evening. Why Dumbledore had to come so late, he would never know nor did he care to ask. James was lowkey one more ‘their sacrifice was for the greater good’ away from punching him in the face and telling the entire Order to find somewhere else to hold their meetings. Just because his parents allowed it when they were alive, didn’t mean he would for much longer.

Regulus buried his head into James’ neck and trilled until James moved over slightly so that Regulus could position himself better on James’ shoulder and glare at Sirius who had come back into the room and scoffed. James just smiled. He knew the brothers loved each other. They just liked to play up the fact that they hated each other once upon a time.

“Are you ready to go to bed, love?” James asked as he yawned.

It had been a long day and he was ready for the day to be over. Regulus rubbed his head against James’ before jumping down into his lap so it was easier for James to pick him up and carry him to their room. James did so and walked up the stairs before setting Regulus down on the bed and changing into his pyjama bottoms. It was October now and it was starting to get a little chilly at night, even if James was a human furnace according to Regulus.

When James crawled into the bed, Regulus kneaded the pillow next to him and circled it until James was done moving around. Once Regulus was satisfied with James’ position, he curled up on top of James’ chest and watched him with his curious eyes. James knew what he was thinking. James was thinking the same thing.

“I know, baby. I don’t want to be here either,” James whispered.

He didn’t want Sirius to hear him, even though he knew he couldn’t. They were on totally different floors and the door was shut. But James didn’t want to have another argument with Sirius about the fact that James didn’t want to be a part of the war any more than Regulus did. Sirius was adamant that Regulus had influenced his decision, which was partially true but he had been thinking about it for a while. They have been out of school and fighting this war for over two years now and they are no closer to winning than when they started and James is just tired of it.

Regulus purred and curled up on James' chest, falling asleep within a few minutes. He didn’t think it would take long for him to fall asleep either but he was waiting to see if Regulus planned on transforming back tonight or not. Not that it made a difference. James watched as Regulus purred contently in his sleep while James rubbed his back. It was one of James’ favourite things to do when Regulus was in his cat form.

“I love you, Regulus,” James said quietly as he nuzzled his nose into Regulus’ fur.

James fell asleep after his eyelids became so heavy he couldn’t keep them open any longer even if he tried. But right before he let sleep drag him under, he felt Regulus transform back and curl into his side.

“I love you too, Jamie.”

@clementinewoolf @cazzythefrogking @maladaptivewriting @multiimoments @lavenderhaze @literally-the-prettiest-star @thebibutterflyao3 @seiworf @emjayeingray @remusregulusrosekiller @heartsoncover @accuratewhereabout @belowthestarrs

#dead gay wizards #marauders fandom #regulus arcturus black #james fleamont potter #sirius orion black #regulus x james #marauders fanfiction #marauderstober

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