#'not' isn't even an option i was given lol

[nekropsii]

[Re: Twitter Cancellation Ask Game]

Anons are live for this!! If everyone behaves, I may keep them on. Answering these in bulk for less spam.

Content Warning: Long.

@starlit1daydream

It's true. I don't even know what there is to defend about them. Not as in I can't see any reason to enjoy their characters - one could theoretically count me as a fan of all three of them, just not in a fandom way - but as in I literally don't know what kind of mental gymnastics people could pull to say they're good, defensible people. I know for Rufioh, it's that He's Hot and Damara Bad, but that doesn't compute in my head as a logical reason, even if it is a tangible and consistent one. There just isn't any math there. Kankri and Cronus aren't ever given consistent reasons for defense, so they're even more incalculable than Rufioh. Cronus is also given the He's Hot reason despite literally not being even remotely attractive, Abusiveness Aside. Fucked.

@time-was-over

People are mad at me about this consistently and I truly cannot think of a single thing more juvenile and liberal to be mad at. Never am I given a good reason to change my mind on Shipping Culture and Fandom being plagues.

"It's deeply misogynistic" gets the response of "Yeah <3" "It's deeply homophobic" gets the response of "Nuh uh! You're just saying that because you hate gay men, you homophobe!" "It's deeply aphobic" gets the response of, again, "Nuh uh! You're just saying that because you hate gay men, you homophobe!", but with added "God, I hope you kill yourself you fun-hating puritan." Lol!

Shipping Culture is a disease and I hope to see it get dismantled in my lifetime. This shit fucking sucks. Not a single brain cell is involved in it. Some of the most bigoted slop in the world is ejected from its gullet.

@memeticexistence

I don't think I have particularly hot takes about Eridan, I just don't woobify him because I do not crave to turn a genocidal incel into a perfect little pretty anime yaoi prince, and I frankly think it is weird how many people do that to his character. There's a lot being said with Eridan's existence, and it all seems to have flown over 99% of the fandom's heads because some people won't keep their dick in their pants about a 13-year-old alt-righter with Harry Potter inspiration plastered all over him. I do not particularly know what you mean by "Jane Truther". What is there to make conspiracies about regarding Jane's character? I don't post about her very often.

Classic. I have gotten yelled at about this on Tumblr as well. I have gotten yelled at for this several times. It's really cool, the way the particularly fandom-brained think. Misogyny is Good if it's a part of the method you Consume Content.

They are burning me at the stake for this daily. They're calling me Crispy Jim now, on account of the burnings. I look like beef jerky with limbs. Sad!

Tumblr has called me homophobic! Several times! Mostly because I said I don't really like DirkJake. Or shipping culture. I'm a grown ass aromantic man who likes horror, I do not want or need countless images of two teenage boys kissing fervently to feel represented. I have options. I can just watch a damn horror movie. Or Dragon Ball Z, or some other anime. Dragon Ball Z never fails me when it comes to aromantic homoeroticism between adult men. Horror movies also never fail me when it comes to homoeroticism between adult men. There are just more options in this world than fanfiction and fanart of teen boys kissing. I don't need it. It just makes me feel like a creep by looking at it half the time. God damn.

[stellacendia]

Um. Duo. What??

[sysig]

What’s Bun-Bun’s signature colour? (Patreon)

[verdiesque]

howww do people do this

[cy-cyborg]

So, there's a lot I want to say about the paralypics, but every time I try I just... can't articulate what I want to say without it turning into a monster of a post that puts my writing advice posts to shame lol. This includes in response to the anonymous asks I got on the topic btw. So I'm going to try and summarise my thoughts here.

As someone who was working towards the Rio paralympics - who was basically one of the people they were actively training to be the next paralympians and who got to go if their choice first athletes had to drop out, the Olympics and paralympics are a... touchy subject for me. I loved playing. I loved my sport. I loved the people I played with. I loved the people I played against. But the way the public and people in power treats disabled athletes sucks. It Really really sucks. and it hurts to talk about.

The vast, vast majority of us aren't paid. We are expected to train at the same intensity as the Olympians with none of the breaks and none of the support to do so, resulting in injuries that are disabling in and of themselves, while juggling normal jobs. many of the paralympians are also in school or at university as well. both schools and jobs see these elite athletes as dedicated hobbiests at best.

I had a friend who were fired from their job because they were denied time off to compete at the paralypics and well, if i had to choose between the paralympics or stay at a shit job paying minimum wage, I know which one I'd pick, and so she didnt have a job when she came back. I have friends who are still in the closet because their sponsors would drop them if they came out as gay, who ended years-long relationships to keep the funding that allowed them and their teams to compete - funding that just covered the costs of travel by the way. They never saw a cent of it themselves, but it was the difference between us having to pay $50 each for our plane tickets and accommodation and having to pay $2,000Aud + for every away game. I have friends who were supposed to go to Tokeyo but were kicked off the teams weeks before the games because of a rule change that decided they weren't disabled enough anymore, wasting years of work with absolutely no warning. They weren't even given the decency of an appology from the people who made the call. Several went through terrifying mental health spirals over it. It was their life's work, gone. I saw so many friends just give up because their disabilities were "too hard to classify" into the International Paralympic Commity's boxes and who were made to feel they weren't welcome by the system spouting off about its diversity and inclusion and empowerment of disabled people.

And then with all that, the best we can hope for is for the social media teams to turn us into a joke for ableds to laugh at or into inspiration porn to make them feel good about themselves - because at least theyre not us. Because obviously, there are no other options in how to show us/sarcasm.

My phone doesn't even have "paralympics" as a recognised word. I have a Samsung. The company that is currently at the paralympics using them as a marketing opertunity. We aren't even recognised as a word in the phones made by the company that is currently using the paralympics as a marketing opportunity. The phones they're giving the athletes won't even recognise the name of the event that they got it at. If I've spelt it wrong, it's because it autocorrects it every time I try to spell it right, and im dyslexic and can't see the difference until I stare at it for a minute or so.

I just... this isn't even scratching the surface of my thoughts. But I wanted to say at least some of it. It will be the last I'm going to talk about it, at least until the event is over.

[suzukiblu]

Excerpt from the one where Kon meets pink kryptonite and decides to fuck Tim and his boyfriend about it.

(The read-more is definitely necessary, length-wise. I . . . got very into this idea and frankly this is barely a third of it so far, lol.)

"So, uh . . ." Kon says, skeptically eyeing the softly glowing rock in his hand. Metallo, like, threw it at his head. He has no idea why. "Is this supposed to do something or . . . ?"

"It's pink," Kara says leerily, staying very firmly back. Like, unexpectedly far back, in fact.

"Yeah, I'm not actually blind, thanks," Kon says, turning the rock over and squinting at it. It continues not to do anything, aside from the glowing thing.

"No, it's pink kryptonite," she stresses.

". . . it literally doesn't hurt at all, though?" Kon says. Though he probably should've figured it was some kind of kryptonite, given that Metallo had it and had apparently thought he could hurt him with it.

Seriously, though, his gloves are fingerless and he's got it right in his hand. It should be hurting him, if it's actually kryptonite.

"Pink kryptonite doesn't work like that," Kara says, edging a little farther back. They're floating a few hundred feet in the air right now, but from the way she's acting Kon's vaguely concerned that he might be about to explode or something. "It just affects our sexual . . . urges."

"Oh," Kon says, frowning in confusion. Weird, but . . . "Is that all?"

"I don't mean like it makes you horny, Kon, I mean like it makes you homosexual," Kara hisses, looking mortified. "And don't ask how I know, alright?!"

Kon . . . blinks.

"What the literal fuck?" he asks incredulously, just staring at her. "How does that even–are you telling me Metallo went and chucked gay kryptonite at me in the middle of a fight?"

"Yes!" Kara says, still clearly mortified. "So just–just stay over there with it until somebody shows up with a lead box, okay?! The effects will stop after we get it contained."

"Alright, alright. So then do you think the dude was flirting with me or is he just a fucking idiot?" Kon jokes, balancing the kryptonite on his index finger with his TTK. "Although I really don't think he'd be my type either way. Like, nothing against cyborgs in general, obviously, just the whole thing with him being a murderous supervillain who literally runs on kryptonite seems like it'd make us totally star-crossed. I want somebody I can actually commit to, you know?"

"Sure," Kara says, still eyeing the kryptonite with serious trepidation. It's really not helping Kon feel less like a time bomb, to be honest. Is there like some other side effect that he should be worrying about right now or something? Like, is he missing something here?

"You seem kinda high-strung about this," he observes, raising an eyebrow at her.

"Look, you'd have avoided it too if you'd dealt with it before!" she says protestingly. "So stay over there and definitely keep it away from Kal, I don't know if Jimmy ever really recovered from the last time."

"Oh, well, congrats to Jimmy, I guess," Kon says, since he can't really see a downside to scoring a one-night stand with Superman. Like, a downside for somebody who isn't literally his clone, he means. The clone thing would definitely make it weird.

Just it's also Clark, though, so he'd probably be the generous type in bed. Like, the sort to really take care of somebody. Be as gentle as happened to be appropriate but also be down if his partner maybe wanted it a little rough for whatever reason. And he'd definitely be able to go all night. Again, Kon isn't gonna go there himself, it really would be too weird, but he can make a logical conclusion. Extrapolate one. Whatever.

Then again he'd be down with Power Girl absolutely destroying him whenever the fuck she wanted to and she's genetically his . . . some form of cousin or something, he guesses. His half-cousin from another reality. So really, Clark's not even that weird an option. And like, all appearances aside Kon's a binary clone anyway, not even a one-for-one match, sooooo . . .

Actually it's probably weirder that he thinks Power Girl is so unspeakably hot but comparatively Kara is just . . . fine? Like, that's a little odd, isn't it?

Maybe it's an attitude thing. Or the costume.

Might be safe to blame the costume, yeah.

It's just such a good costume. Like, Kon aspires to reach that level of costume.

But really, all that aside he still doesn't even know what the big deal about temporarily going gay is, although to be fair he's also currently talking to Supergirl and not, like . . . literally any dude whatsoever. So like, who knows how weird this stuff might actually make him under those circumstances. Maybe it like fucks with inhibitions and stuff too?

Yeah, hell if he knows. He's really only dealt with green kryptonite before. He was vaguely aware that other colors existed and apparently did different stuff, but . . . this just seems very different, put it that way.

Maybe best to avoid Jimmy Olsen for a little while, Kon decides privately. The guy probably doesn't need that.

Besides, Clark apparently got there first anyway and Kon just really doesn't want to be worrying about measuring up. Miss him with that, thanks.

. . . although maybe he'll go visit Tim later.

Eh, no, Kara made it sound like the pink K's gonna stop affecting him pretty quick once they box it up, so not much point in bothering. Though maybe he'll visit just to hang, come to think of it; they haven't seen each other in almost a whole week. Well, he hasn't seen Tim, at least–who knows how much Bat-surveillance Tim's seen him through.

Kon should maybe sweep his room for bugs again. Note to self.

Although would it be weird to just like . . . keep the pink kryptonite, maybe? Since it apparently doesn't actually hurt anyone or anything? Because that could be, well . . . just interesting, that's all. Like, Kon is open to exploring that experience. Just–as an experience.

"Actually, you're surprisingly not high-strung about this," Kara says.

"Am I?" Kon asks. "I mean, it's not that big a deal, is it?"

She stares at him.

"Kon," she says slowly. "Pink kryptonite affects your sexuality. It makes you attracted to people you're not normally attracted to. It confuses you and everyone around you and it is really freaking embarrassing to explain afterwards."

"I've been mind-controlled into shaving my head and breaking my best friend's arm," Kon says, continuing to not really see what the big deal is. "That was embarrassing. And fucking traumatic. This? This is just kinda weird."

"Only kinda?" Kara asks incredulously. "You're one of the straightest guys I know! How are you just fine with this?!"

"I mean to be fair, that's probably making some unfair generalizations about straight guys," Kon points out. Kara stares at him. "What?"

"I don't even know how to respond to that," she says.

"Sorry?" Kon says, then tucks the pink kryptonite into his jacket pocket with a shrug. He's not trying to hide it or anything; just getting kinda sick of holding it. And it's that or he either ditches it somewhere or starts tossing it around and that'd probably be . . . just, well, absolutely epically stupid of him.

Or it seems like it would be, anyway. Whatever color it is, it's still kryptonite.

"I mentioned keeping that away from Kal, right?" Kara says.

"Yeah, on that note, are they like . . . done down there yet?" Kon asks, glancing down towards the mess of the street that Clark's standing on a few hundred feet below with a whole bunch of randos from S.T.A.R. Labs, for some reason. Somebody mentioned something about neutralizing Metallo's kryptonite heart without actually killing him, but mostly it was science talk and clearly theoretical anyway so to be honest Kon'd kinda tuned it all out as "not currently relevant", and that's all he knows.

"Definitely not," Kara says.

"I'm gonna call Robin while we're killing time, then," Kon says, pulling out his phone.

"You're going to call your closest male friend," Kara says. "Right now. While you've got pink kryptonite in your pocket."

"Yup," Kon says, already pulling up Tim's contact.

"Can you not see how that might be a bad idea at the moment?" Kara asks. "Not in any way whatsoever?"

"Well I'm not calling Impulse," Kon replies reasonably. Kara stares at him again, for some reason.

Eh, whatever.

He calls Tim.

"Hey, Conner, what's up?" Tim answers distractedly, which Kon doesn't hold against him because when isn't Tim distracted, really. Dude's got too much going on in that head of his, for real. He's just glad the guy ever picks up the phone at all.

"So apparently I'm gay right now," Kon greets conversationally, figuring he should lead with that just in case he actually is about to do something embarrassing to explain. "Pink kryptonite is fucking weird, man."

". . . uh," Tim says as Kara covers her face with her hands. "What?"

"Pink kryptonite makes you gay, Kara says," Kon says. "And we're both just kind of chilling above downtown Metropolis waiting for Kal to finish up with the science-y people so we can get said pink K locked up, so I'm bored out of my mind right now and calling you to complain about it."

"You're calling me," Tim says slowly. "While you're . . . gay."

"What, is he asking to come over?" another voice asks from the phone, sounding amused. It takes Kon a second to recognize it, but–oh yeah, that's the mysterious Bernard, isn't it?

Right, Tim has a boyfriend now. Kon's never actually met him on account of being the worst at secret identities and the whole thing that is Bernard living very firmly in Gotham, land of "no metas allowed unless you're either a supervillain or Batman's too dead to stop you", but he's heard him over the phone a couple times now, although they've never actually personally talked. So maybe thinking about Tim while being high on pink kryptonite isn't actually, like, kosher? Or polite. Or whatever.

. . . then again, Bernard did ask.

"I don't know, maybe?" Kon says thoughtfully, considering the idea. "Are you open to me coming over?"

"Yes," Bernard says.

"Bernard," Tim says.

"Babe, I know we're pretending I don't know you're an ass-kicking vigilante and all but come on, don't make me turn down Superboy," Bernard says wryly.

"We're–wait, pretending?!" Tim sputters.

"Pretending so, so hard," Bernard confirms, sounding nothing but fond. Kon's actually a little jealous of that tone of voice, he's gotta admit. Like–it's been a bit since anybody's talked to him that way, is all. "But like, if you actually thought you were being subtle maybe you shouldn't talk about kryptonite on the phone right in front of me or put themed emojis next to all your superfriends' civilian names in your contacts list?"

"Oh my god, you do that?!" Kon asks with a gleeful cackle, immediately forgetting everything else in favor of that absolutely delightful piece of information. "You're the worst! Batman just rolled over in his grave and Oracle is absolutely losing her shit on the other end of her wiretap!"

"B's not even dead right now," Tim says in exasperation. "And if O cared she'd have already hacked my phone and changed them. And for the record plenty of people put random superhero emojis next to their friends' names, that's a totally normal thing to do!"

"Usually the random superhero emojis aren't associated with contact pics that are dead fucking ringers for said superheroes," Bernard says, sounding amused again. "Just as a thing and all."

". . . anyway so you're gay today, how's that going for you, Conner?" Tim says as Bernard laughs gleefully in the background. "Triggering any unfortunate mental health crisises or anything? Making you worry about the validity of your masculinity? Because I can safely assure you that's all bullshit and you're fine."

"Naw, I know all that, being gay is just a thing," Kon says with a shrug. "Kara's being a little weird about it but honestly it's going way better than, like, the times supervillains mind-controlled me into being into them. Like just as an overall experience, I mean."

"Wait, how many times has that come up?" Tim asks in bemusement.

"I dunno?" Kon shrugs again. "I mean you were there for the Poison Ivy incident, and then Gorgeous Gilly happened to me a while later, which was, uh, genuinely horrifying because she tried to literally marry me during all that, so . . . I think just the twice, probably? But don't quote me on that, I don't even remember what I had for breakfast."

"And how is Kara being weird, exactly?" Tim says in his very unsubtle "assessing my teammate's psychological condition" voice.

"Oh, she's mostly just avoiding me?" Kon says, as a guy who's personally not really all that concerned with his psychological condition at the moment. "Because I've got the rock in my pocket on account of not wanting to just leave it lying around somewhere and she doesn't want to get affected by it. I don't know why, I don't really get why it matters."

"I mean it matters, definitely," Bernard says. "Like it very strongly matters to a lot of people."

"Fair, but I think we're all too invulnerable to really have to worry about getting gay-bashed or anything," Kon reasons. "Like, at least not as a heat of the moment thing."

". . . god can you imagine the world we would live in if every piece of shit gay-basher had to deal with the consequences of punching fucking Superman?" Bernard says feelingly. "For real."

"Oh, pink K's temporary," Kon clarifies. "Kal's not gay anymore."

"Hold up, I'm sorry, are you saying that at some point he was?" Bernard demands in obvious delight. "Is that what you're telling me right now?"

"I guess he was into redheads?" Kon says, tilting his head. "Slightly twinky redheads, specifically. Which I don't blame him for, I'm gonna be honest."

"Well now I know that forever, thanks," Tim says dryly.

"Alternate option: he could've been into Batman," Kon points out.

"Redheads it is," Tim says. "You just . . . redhead away over there."

"I mean I thought about it, kinda," Kon admits.

"Ngh," Tim says, for some reason.

"No thinking about Batman, though?" Bernard asks with a snicker.

"Not so much," Kon says, making a face. "Did consider having some Superman thoughts but I'm apparently not that narcissistic, surprisingly enough."

"Kon!" Kara chokes.

"Tell me you've never considered having Superman thoughts and I'll tell you you're a fucking liar," Kon snorts, shooting her a dry look. "Weren't you like totally naked when you first showed up on Earth? And then he found you like that and wrapped you up in his cape all nice and gentlemanly and took you home with him?"

"He is my baby cousin and you're being affected by pink kryptonite poisoning!" Kara accuses, her face bright red.

"Wait, is it actually poisoning me?" Kon says with a frown. "I feel like you should've led with it actually poisoning me, if that's actually a thing."

"Well no, not actually, it's physically harmless," Kara says grudgingly, folding her arms. "But you're still being affected! You're having Superman thoughts, of all things!"

"He just seems like he'd be considerate," Kon says reasonably. "Like, you know. Biblically."

"Ngh," Tim says, again for no apparent reason. Bernard sounds like he might be laughing. Or choking? Or maybe both; it's unclear.

"Please don't hit on Kal," Kara says. "Especially don't hit on Kal with pink kryptonite in your pocket. I don't want to know how that situation would end up."

"Ideally with him being considerate," Kon says. Tim chokes. Kara covers her face again.

"Does pink kryptonite affect your inhibitions too or are you just always like this?" Bernard asks curiously.

"Eh, pretty sure I'm just always like this, going by the things I've definitely still not been forgiven for saying to Power Girl," Kon says, idly tapping a finger against the side of his phone case. "Like, pretty damn sure at this point."

"That is unfortunately accurate," Tim agrees resignedly.

"So you're saying it is ethically okay to have Superboy over while he's gay," Bernard says in a promisingly speculative tone. Kon grins. Just a little, but yeah–definitely he grins. Kara grimaces, because she is absolutely no fun whatsoever.

Spoilsport.

"I did not in any way say that," Tim retorts dubiously.

"I mean that's what I heard, man, and I'm the one with super-hearing in this conversation," Kon says with a wider grin. "My inhibitions are all inhibited and my personal opinions of people are all the same, I'm just currently batting for the other team."

"So your normal opinion of me is that if you were gay, you'd come over," Tim says dryly.

"Yeah?" Kon says, raising an eyebrow. "I mean, obviously."

"How is that obvious?" Tim says.

"Because I already come over every time you let me," Kon reminds him.

"Oh yeah?" Bernard says slyly. "And how often does he let you come, exactly?"

"Not often enough," Kon replies honestly, and doesn't even bite at the obvious dumb sex joke Bernard so thoughtfully set up for him even though it is frankly painful not to.

"Ngh," Tim says. Kon continues not to understand the reason for him repeatedly making that same weird little noise, but whatever, he guesses. It's Tim, maybe he's stitching his own bullet wounds again or something. Guy's a multi-tasker like that.

"You know this would probably make for a fascinating case study about sexuality, actually," Bernard says musingly. "I mean, all I intend to do is abuse the situation to get into your very tight tights, but seriously, maybe we should all be taking notes or something."

"Ugh, hell no, Rob'll go full Bat if we let him do that," Kon snorts, then smirks. "He can take pictures, though, I know he's into that."

"Ngh," Tim says yet again, accompanied by a weird random "thump". If Kon didn't know better, he'd think he'd just fallen off a chair or something.

"Aw dammit, dude, I think I actually like you as a person now," Bernard says, sniggering. "Are you keeping the kryptonite? Please keep the kryptonite. Like, just for Valentine's and Tim's birthday, that's all I ask."

"Honestly don't know if Superman's gonna let me but I do kinda wanna," Kon admits. It seems pretty convenient, really. And definitely fun.

". . . and you're sure his inhibitions and opinions aren't being influenced in any way, Kara?" Tim asks suspiciously.

"He's really just like this, yeah," Kara says resignedly. "Well admittedly Kal spontaneously developed opinions on window treatments and used the word 'smashing' in cold blood when it happened to him, but that might've just been him sucking at flirting. Because he really does suck at flirting."

"What about when it was you?" Kon asks curiously.

"No one ever said it happened to me," Kara says.

"You kinda implied–"

"No one ever said it happened to me," Kara repeats, narrowing her eyes at him and doing an impressively bad job of acting like she's not blushing.

So it definitely happened to her, yeah.

"Okaaaaay, we'll pretend about that too then," Bernard says. "Well, what are your opinions on window treatments, Conner?"

"That I don't know what they are," Kon says.

"Sounds like he's in his right mind to me," Bernard says.

"He is absolutely not," Kara retorts dubiously.

"I really don't feel weird or anything, I swear," Kon tells her, since he still doesn't get the problem but also doesn't actually want to worry her either. "I don't even feel any different."

"Kon, you are hitting on your best friend and his boyfriend," Kara says. "Together. At once. Simultaneously, one might even say."

"You've met Wonder Girl and Arrowette before, right?" Kon says. "And both the Batgirls? And–"

"Oh my god, Kon," she cuts him off.

"Just saying," he says, then pauses for a moment and frowns consideringly. "Actually, question, how gay is this stuff making me, because while we're on the topic of threeways I kinda always wondered about what Starfire and Nightwing get up to together and if–"

"KON!" Kara yells, covering her ears.

"I'm just asking," he huffs.

"I don't know if it's actually possible to be gay enough to not be into Starfire," Bernard says musingly. "Like I can't imagine how it ever could be."

"Right?" Kon says.

"It's possible to not be into Starfire," Tim says. "Like, theoretically. Asexuals and aromantics both exist, for one."

"Do they?" Kon says doubtfully. "Like in general, sure, but when around specifically Starfire?"

". . . I can't technically prove you wrong due to a lack of reliable evidence but still," Tim says. "The possibility is there. If nothing else the multiverse is a thing."

"Last time I saw her she was wearing half a gold lamé bikini and I am not going to tell you which half or define how loosely I am using the term 'wearing'," Kon says.

"I said it's possible, not probable," Tim says.

"What about you, man, are you the gold lamé type?" Bernard asks with a teasing snicker. "Just while you're gay and all, of course. That's like, practically a cultural thing. Gotta be authentic to the experience, yeah?"

"That is in no way whatsoever a cultural thing, babe," Tim says dubiously.

"Please, like I've never worn freaking lamé," Kon scoffs. "I've worn collars and loincloths and leather and crop tops and enough unnecessary belts to tie up a Bat, lamé is nothing."

"Collars and . . . loincloths?" Bernard repeats, sounding confused.

"Yeah, this one time I crash-landed on a lost isle of beast-men and they kidnapped and enslaved me for a few months," Kon explains, waving a hand distractedly. "Frankly I count myself lucky they even let me have the collar, much less the loincloth."

". . . um," Bernard says.

"You, uh, never mentioned the collar part of that story before, Kon," Tim says, clearing his throat. "You very definitely never mentioned the collar part of that story before."

"Oh yeah, the prince kinda kept me as his pet for a little bit?" Kon tells him with an easy shrug. "Like he and all his buddies ganged up on me and then took me home with them, but I was kinda . . . feral, I guess? Technically? So like, collar and chain setup. But he was cool, he took real good care of me."

"Ngh," Tim says just barely faintly.

"Yeah you should definitely come over," Bernard says. "Tim, get the check. Conner, exactly how super is your super-speed?"

"You can just call me Kon," Kon says. "And . . . mach 3, last I clocked it?"

"Isn't that like two thousand miles per hour?" Bernard asks.

"Two thousand two hundred and twenty-three point three," Kon replies with a pleased smirk. "Faster than a speeding bullet. Or so they tell me."

"We'll just meet you at Tim's, how's that," Bernard says. "That work for you, Kon?"

"That works for me, Bernard," Kon confirms, smirking wider.

"Oh my god, Kon, you cannot possibly be serious right now," Kara says in exasperation, rubbing at her temples. "Just because you're temporarily gay doesn't mean you should do anything about it!"

"I mean, I'm feeling pretty serious?" Kon says, shrugging again. He still doesn't get why she's being so sensitive about this. "It's not like this is the weirdest thing I've ever done in pursuit of a good time. Like, holy hell, lemme tell you about the Ravers sometime."

"You're going to have to look Robin in the eye after this!" Kara says. "And work with him! And be a normal person in his presence! Normally!"

"I'm aware?" Kon says, vaguely bemused by her concern. Like he's never been normal around somebody he's slept with before, geez. "Tell Kal I ran off with the pink K, if he wants to lock it up in the Fortress or wherever I can bring it back tomorrow."

"Maybe Monday," Bernard says.

"Or maybe Monday," Kon amends.

"It's Thursday!" Kara sputters.

"So it's a long weekend," Bernard says.

"I'm not explaining this to Kal," Kara says. "I'm not explaining this to Batman."

"I really don't see why you'd have to," Kon says. "Rob, you cool with the long weekend thing? Not too much of an imposition?"

". . . I got the check," Tim mutters in obvious and absolute mortification.

Kon's gonna take that as a "yes".

"Cool," he says, grinning broadly. "See you soon, Boy Wonder."

He ends the call. Kara drags her hands down her face and continues to stay very far away from him and the pink kryptonite in his pocket.

"When you go back to normal and freak out and make everything weird with Robin and your team and even Robin's literal boyfriend, I'm going to say so many 'I told you so's," she swears vehemently. "So don't say I didn't warn you."

"Your objection is on the record," Kon says, then tosses her a lazy salute with another grin and takes off, kryptonite and all.

Best to just scarper while Clark's distracted, yeah?

Definitely best.

[normal-thoughts-official]

it always struck me as kind of hilarious that you have to pass a 30DC check to convince shadowheart not to kill dame aylin but if you're just like "sure do whatever lol" she chooses not to kill her anyway. tsundere ass fuck. killing is bad unless it's out of spite. i have morals unless you try to tell me what to do

but i just got to that scene in my new replay and it made me realize that that's not what's at stake at all

because the persuasion check isn't "don't do this". the persuasion check is, your life is whatever you make of it. you don't have to do something just because your goddess tells you to.

convincing shadowheart not to kill dame aylin is easy. she knows it's wrong, and she doesn't want to, not really. if given the choice, she is literally unable to go through with it even if she clearly wants to, or wants to want to so badly she can't tell the difference

the problem is convincing her she has an option in the first place

the problem is convincing her that her life is her own

shadowheart has never belonged to herself since she was captured. not in body, not in soul, not in mind, not even her memories. she quite literally doesn't know who she is in more ways than one. she doesn't know her past or her family, she doesn't know who her loved ones are (including the sharran loved ones, like nocturne), all she really knows about herself is a fear of wolves that's been implanted into her by lies and an attachment to a flower she can't remember the details of. and a mission. always a mission. the will of someone else she has to carry on, that is not for her to understand or question or think about. she can't even want to serve shar, because she isn't allowed to pursue her intention to become a dark justiciar. she is supposed to be well and truly nothing, empty as the sharran doctrine

(oh, and pain that she doesn't know the reason of. no matter what, she must bear the pain)

how can she see herself as more than her goddess, when she quite literally doesn't know anything about who she is other than her devotion to shar? how can she choose her own destiny, when she couldn't even choose how to devote and give herself over to her?

she can't, which is why, unless you have infinite rizz points and/or roll a nat20, shadowheart attacks you. not dame aylin. you. and she never argues about whether or not it's the right thing, because she knows. what she's rebelling against isn't the idea of letting dame aylin go. what she's rebelling against is the idea that she could leave her cage and belong to no one but herself. because the idea is scary and she quite literally doesn't know where to begin. which is why her obsession becomes to find her parents, even though she doesn't remember them at all. because maybe they can tell her who she's supposed to be, and she can have the comfort of having her path laid out before her again

(which is also why she has to kill them. not because of some hand hurty curse bullshit. but because she just wants them and selûne to become the new shar, and she has to let that go if she truly means to claim herself again)

and now im sad. because it's easier for shadowheart to do turn against shar and everything she's ever had on the grounds of saving someone else than on the grounds that she deserves better than to be a puppet. even if you do nothing, saving dame aylin, to her, is easy. saving herself is a wholly different matter, one she's not sure she has any right to, or wants to, even if it's what she really needs. accepting a selûnite's humanity is easier than accepting her own. losing everything is easier than gaining her own autonomy. and she will fight tooth and nail to be allowed to stay in her own, metaphorical soul cage

[sandflakedraws]

Okay I’m not even into trolls or anything, but that height analysis was pretty cool and interesting lol

Any more things you analyzed? (Or even a fun fact, idk, just wanna see people talk about things they like)

i've analyzed quite a lot but one thing i haven't seen other folks fully explore is the horrific living conditions in that bottle.

i know why it's not covered in film, cause again, this story is a silly musical comedy for kids! and if it were given it's full appraisal, the tone of the movie would be absolutely shot.

...

but like,,,, it's so dang bad in there my dude. it's SO bad.

like, in it's upright position, the diamond's base isn't big enough for floyd to lay down on, without cricking his neck severely.

so even when we see him drifting to sleep, he's sitting. minimum 2 months of trying to sleep sitting up. (against a cold/hard surface no less)

(he's also got an instant-wake response to . someone lightly tapping on the door. . .)

oh and also! the air in there has gotta be super thin, as there is but a single breathing hole at the top of it, not even as wide as a troll finger.

and that's ! when it's not capped off ! most of the time, it's got the spritz cap on, making it even harder for any air to circulate in there.

while we're at it ; since that's the only opening (no clasps, no grooves, no visual indicators that it can open via any other method at all, hence the film's conceit that the brothers need to hit the PFH to free him), i'm inclined to believe that it's also the only way to get food to him...

... which is to say you can have your pick of many terrible options for that. whether velvet & veneer tried to mash something through there, or have him sip from the world's worst gerbil feeder,

or they just. didn't feed him at all. and he's only alive because it's a magic world.

wHICH IS STILL SAYING NOTHING ABOUT HOW THEY ACTUALLY HANDLE HIM

plugging those excerpts cause. y. yeah... they're not gentle with him at all. bro is Bruised to all hell.

.... and none of this has to do with the actual core threat in the movie, which is having his core forcefully ripped from his body, leading to the whiteness and crystallization we see goin on.

in conclusion i need way more art/fics covering floyd's recovery okay? okay.

[wings-of-ink]

Future IFs Poll

So, in case you have not seen me post about it before, I am considering a project to do on the side while I work on God-Cursed. This will help me take breaks from my main work and stretch my creativity muscles with different characters and settings. I'd like a bit of feedback from what readers are more interested in from the best ideas I can potentially pull from right now. Feel free to vote, comment, or even send an ask if you want to be anonymous.

Over the last year or so, I have jotted down many basic plots I could expound on, but only a few have really stuck out to me as ones I could really expand in a meaningful way.

So, a couple housekeeping things to keep in mind. Whatever ends up getting written, it will have a modern-day setting. The fantasy playground is fun, but I really want a more real-world setting for this one. I am also debating about all ROs being gender-selectable. Since this side piece is supposed to be a little oasis for me too, not having each RO as customizable would ease the work that goes into it, and it might actually mean I can have more than just a few options for you as well. I am also considering a middle ground and having one or two characters customizable still while the others will be set.

Below I have given some details on the ideas I'm working with and further down is a poll that you can vote for the one that calls out to you the most. I have 2 ideas so far that are standouts among the others, but I've included 4 in the poll that I can work with. The winner isn't guaranteed to be what I end up writing, but I am very strongly going to consider the results while I decide. I like all these ideas and they sound fun to write - so none of this telling me to write what I want - I already want to do them all, lol (looking at you @elegantunknownphantom). There are caveats to each one, of course, and I'll explain that in the details.

Options:

Serial-killer crime drama:  "Daddy was a Killer" (title sounds like it came from a Lifetime original movie, but I really like it)

No doting daddies here, readers. Play as the traumatized child of a serial killer with repressed memories of the horrible things they witnessed daddy do. Get accused of a murder you didn't commit (probably), and try to catch your darling dad while dealing with the psychological devastation of all the horrors you've seen before he can kill again (and again, and again). Discover where your daddy disappeared to all those years ago, and what really happened to your mom.

Downsides:  I have a decent grasp of the plot on this one, but it would require a good deal of research (which I tend to do anyway to an extent), since I'd like a fairly realistic feel to the actual crime-solving stuff. Either that, or I can go the "rogue detective" route and play it fast and loose. This work would be in a wheelhouse I've never quite been in before, which is fun on one hand but nerve-wracking on another.

RO ideas include:

A smarmy detective (of course!)

A neighbor concerned for your well-being (mostly because you scream in your sleep)

And the child of one of your daddy's victims.

Supernatural mystery:  "Shivers" (title up for adjustment, but I kinda dig it)

Play as an MC with a bizarre anxious tic - an intense and chilling shiver that you get seemingly out of nowhere. It only lasts a couple seconds and you've dealt with it since childhood, so it's easily dismissed. That is, until you experience a sudden surge in occurrences. Your doctor writes it off as stress from dealing with the erratic behavior of your mother. But after a near-death experience, during which this mysterious tic guides you to safety, you know there is more to it than stress. With the help of your best friend(s) and a shady medium, find out what has attached itself to you and what seeks to claim you, discover who your real father is, and embrace or deny your own strengths as a medium.

Downsides:  I feel like there's a lot of supernatural IFs already, some of which are already similar to this or have similar aspects. This one probably won't have the drama/emotional potential that some of the others do, which may be a boon to some readers as it would be a little lighter.

RO ideas include:

the best friend(s) (potentially 2 besties to choose from - twins)

a (mostly) fake spiritual medium

a brave EMT who came to your rescue

and something…otherworldly.

Gritty Drama:  no title  (more of a framework to build from)

This one would be completely riddled with warnings, and I kinda just see it as being a fun outlet for some angst, smut, unhinged shit, and violence. 👍

The ideas for this one didn't start around a firm plot, but around a setting/scenario stemming from one of my OCs. The vibe here is very much "sex, drugs, and rock 'n' roll" and fits into the seedy nightclub/crime ring thing. It would be a playground of questionable characters and life-choices. You would choose the dire straits that put your MC in the employ of a dangerous kingpin. Perhaps MC owes a lot of money to someone, got into trouble with a rival faction, or was framed for a crime, etc.... You'd get to choose the MC's line of work under the organization - be it in drugs, entertainment (music/dance/alcohol/sex), or security. The issue that leads to your employ under a sex-peddling drug-trafficker will haunt you in your new life in the middle of a war between the rulers of the underground.

Downsides:  Not super fleshed-out plot wise, but I don't think it would be too hard to build on either. I may want to use this setting (or something like it) and my OC for a different project one of these days, but I'm unsure about that as well. And, the obvious, red flags and triggers everywhere for a setting like this.

RO ideas: 

One person from each potential "job" (the head of security, a chemist who seems too pure to be making hard drugs, a sex-worker, the clumsy bartender, a cute DJ)

A member of a rival faction

And for the brave and stupid - your boss - a clever and unhinged woman with an affinity for knives. And, no, she will never love you.

Futuristic:  no title (needs the most work)

Including this one to just get a feel for how it's received, but I anticipate that it won't get quite as much backing as the others. I have the character-creation concept in mind which lends itself to a plot, and a RO or two, but that's about it. I think I could do something fun with it, but I've also never written anything futuristic or scifi before. This would be akin to "Detroit: Become Human."

Though the setting would be futuristic, I am pretty sure I wouldn't want to do a dystopian thing. There's a lot of that out there already and we're basically living it IRL; it's a blast to read, but I want the main focus to be on something else if I do this. There would still be pockets of grittiness to the setting, because if we're talking humanity, there's gonna be grit somewhere. But this world would be more post-dystopian. Say, the rebels won and life has gotten better across the board for people? And though everyday life has a lot of tech enhancements, we haven't seen sentient machines - yet. That's where you come in.

The MC Concept is that they are an android - of course! One of the nice made-to-order kind that only the rich can afford. But what makes the MC unique is that while everyone else requests specific things about the androids they purchase - such as gender, looks and even downloadable personalities - an order comes in that's blank. It only requests that the android be allowed to choose who they are and how they look. "The Buyer" will pay for whatever personality, enhancements, or clothing they want - but the android must make the choices themselves.

As your MC goes through these initial choices, equipped only with a basic "education" software full of un-opinionated information about the world and how it works, something unusual begins to spark within them (not that they know how unusual it is yet).

RO ideas:

The Buyer–a gender-selectable person who sets your creation in motion. They're wealthy, well-respected, earnest, and incredibly lonely. Who are they really and why did they do this?

The Scientist–a hopefully trustworthy person that's very interested in your development

The Punk–someone who wants to give you the "real" human experience.

Make your selection below. Comment your thoughts and ideas as well if you like. This is set for a week and I will reblog here and there so it has a chance to reach as many of you who would like to vote as possible.

[profundcherrylady]

SINGLE DAD!SAE ITOSHI.

A/N: Finally writing about Sae's late wife because y'all have been begging me to (y'all: like 3 people). Honestly idk if I'm gonna make more parts of this one so sorry I can't think of anything else at the moment (and I have other themes I wanna write)

Warnings: Mentions of death (kinda explicit but not too much) and SOME angst, bc obviously he's gonna be sad. Lots of grieving (it all works out in the end trust 🙏)

Contents: Sae being a little careless and awkward lol, kid not knowing a single thing about keeping her thoughts to herself, some fluff but this is a weird mix of like three things at the same time including hurt/comfort. Implied fem!reader (usage of femenine pronouns for reader, reader being refered to as 'miss')

Description: After losing his daughter at the supermarket, y/n FINALLY makes and appearance and makes the tag "sae x reader" make sense for once.

At the vegetable section, you struggled to choose between the various options to bring home for dinner. It shouldn't be this hard, since you were all by yourself most of the time, but you couldn't decide what you wanted to eat. It was then when you felt a gentle tug on your coat that made you look down, little teary teal eyes meeting yours and almost making you smile at the adorable sight of this kid staring at you in confusion.

"Hey sweetheart, what's wrong? Where are your parents?" you took notice of the lack of adult supervision this child had, since all the other adults around seemed to be either alone or not in panic of having lost a kid.

The girl opened her mouth to speak but then paused (seemingly reconsidering her words) and then spoke again, "Hi, my name is Mao Itoshi. I can't find my papa right now, can you help me find him or get me to the 'nearesest' 'autohority'?

And your heart almost melted at the way she messed up her little speech (which you assumed was given by her father in case she got lost). And how could you say no to helping this little angel? "Aw, of course honey, let's get you to your dad." you took her small hand in yours, ensuring she wouldn't get lost again, and started walking around in hopes to find her father. She still seemed a little scared and confused but you managed to calmed her down with the assurance of finding her dad. "What does he look like?"

"Um... he's... super tall and super cool-looking." you chuckled at her answer. Of course she wouldn't give you an actual description.

"I mean, what's the color of his hair or his eyes. Does he have eyes like yours?"

"Yeah."

"And what's his name?"

"...Papa?" you laughed again.

"You know your dad's name isn't 'papa', right? He has an actual name."

"He does??? What is it?"

"I don't know." you giggled. "Don't worry, I'm sure we'll know when we find him."

"Mao!!" a short-breathed, panicked voice interrupted your little conversation, and it was then when you spotted Sae for the first time. You weren't particularly interested in football, but even then Sae's reputation as the country's favorite midfielder was hard to ignore. One would think he wouldn't be out in a public space like this, but here he was, a totally different face as what was shown in the media. He looked just like a regular father, relived to have found his child.

"Papa!" the child beamed at the sight of her dad, and she let herself be carried and hugged as soon as he reached her.

"What were you thinking wandering around like that? You're just so- I've told you a million times- You are in so much trouble, young lady, you- What did you think would happen if-" he took a moment to breathe. In moments like this one, gentle parenting was probably one of the hardest things Sae has ever done. He tried his best to not loose his cool and scream at her; that wouldn't solve anything. The important thing was that she was safe and sound. "...You are going to give me a heart attack one of these days. Something bad could've happened to you, you know? I'm just... glad you're okay." and it was then when Sae first took notice of you, standing awkwardly trying to not ruin the little family reunion.

"She helped me get to you, papa." he heard his daughter explain, and it made sense because he knew the little girl would probably still be crying for her dad if no one was there to help. So although he would've liked to avoid the extra social interaction, he figured the least he could do was say thank you.

"Thank you for helping her. I've told her to not wander around, especially in big supermarkets like this, but she just won't listen sometimes..." you chuckled once again, now more from embarrassment than amusement at her antics.

"That's okay. I know how kids can be."

"You got any?" he inquired, and you shook your head with another laugh (which Sae didn't understand because he asked seriously).

"Nah. I mean, they're nice, I'm not saying I wouldn't like any, but I don't have any kids at the moment. Just little siblings; they can be just as difficult."

"You don't have to tell me twice..." he scrunched his nose a little at the thought of Rin as a child, and how difficult he was to handle, which in retrospective made it easy to figure how he got along so well with his niece (lil bro was just as problematic)

"But your kid seems nice. I'm sure she's a good child."

"When she wants to be... but mostly yes, I try to make sure she grows up to be good."

"I'm pretty sure she will."

"Are you single, miss?" Sae turned his head at his child so fast he might've breaked his neck, but he didn't care about that, he was too busy being shocked.

"Mao, don't ask people things like that."

"Why not? She's so nice to me, I like her. And you're single too!"

"That doesn't mean you can ask her if she's single. You need to think before you speak a little more, god..." he turned to you again, "So sorry about her; seems like she hasn't learned social norms yet." (Isn't that his job to teach her? Lol.) "We'll be going now, thanks again." with the still complaining child on his arms, he walked away to his shortly abandoned shopping cart, making sure to NOT set her down this time so he could keep an eye on her.

"Papaaaaa."

"Don't throw a tantrum in here, please... what's going on now? What you did was wrong, you know?" he sighed. "I don't you didn't mean anything bad, but you can't just ask any woman who is nice if she's single and try to set her up with me."

"Why not?"

"It just isn't correct, okay? Why are you insisting so much on this?" she pouted, hiding her face on his shoulder on an attempt to not talk to him. Sae rolled his eyes at the sight as he continued pushing the shopping cart through the aisles, then spoke again. "Come on, tell me."

"I wanna do the mommy-daughter dance at school..."

"Oh..." that made it make sense. "I could do it with you; you don't have to set up strange women with me for a parent-daughter dance."

"It's a mommy-daughter dance! It's not the same... I'm the only one who doesn't have a mom and the teacher says it's okay but I know my classmates are gonna think I'm weird." he hummed, understanding her feelings. Of course, he hadn't gone through anything similar, but he could get how she could feel singled out if she showed up to a mother-daughter dance with her father. He really did wish there was something he could do to make her feel a little better.

"Well, sweetie, there's not much I can do... you know I'm happy to do the dance with you if you want." he felt her lower her voice a little as he got closer to the line infront of the check-out.

"I know..."

"Don't get so sad... you're not going to be left out, I promise. It's the same thing, I mean, what difference does it make? I'm still a parent, and you said your teacher said it was okay."

"She did..." Sae's attempts to cheer up his daughter were failing, so he went straight to the only fool-proof plan he's ever known to always work.

"You want me to buy you ice-cream?"

"Okay..." he smiled a little for her, hoping to coax her to do the same, and once he was close enough to the small ice-cream freezer next to the cash register he opened the lid to take one for the little girl (one he knew for sure that she loved, just to be safe). But as he was taking out his hand he took notice of your presence, again. You looked even more surprised than him, but your expression quickly changed at the sight of the sad child.

"Aw... it's you again." you said, "why the long face, little one?"

"Don't mind her, she's upset about something... rightfully." Sae responded before Mao could. "Can't do anything about it though."

"A mother-daughter dance."

"And... why is that difficult...? Does she not have a...?"

"No."

"Oh... I'm very sorry." he answered you straight to the point. He was used to people asking about his late wife but he never bothered talking about it. It just... still hurt. And it kind of hurt even more knowing he couldn't give his daughter the one thing she yearned for the most, even though everyday he tried his hardest to give her the best life possible. He did everything in his power, he fought and struggled and worked day-to-day to be both a father and a mother somehow but it still wasn't enough. She still missed her mom as much as he did and the thought of replacing that woman was... well, there's just a reason why Sae was out of the dating game after his wife's passing.

And now he was here, teary-eyed child on his arms and a woman he only met once that same day on the supermarket, when the possibly stupidest idea came up to his brain, and he made the stupidest decision of saying it out loud.

"Listen, I know we don't... know each other technically but my daughter seems to think you're nice and... could you go with her to that dance? She just... she doesn't want to feel left out." he was also kind of desperate. Like really, really desperate because if he wasn't he wouldn't be asking this to a supermarket stranger. "You don't have to if you don't want to, but I... can't seem to find a solution to this. She'll settle to go with me if I tell her but she'll be sad and... people won't know you aren't actually her mom. It'll just be one night."

You doubted for a moment, but when you looked at that sad little girl with her big eyes full of tears, how on earth were you supposed to say no?

"Okay, I'll do it. I don't mind."

"And don't get me wrong, okay? I'm not trying to... replace her mother or anything; it's just that one night." he warned, and you nodded. "Thank you."

He tried to be nonchalant about it, however it was hard to deny the strange feelings he had about the situation. He closed himself off after his wife passed away and he promised to not try and find her a replacement, alas not get married again. This was the mother of his only child and the one woman he could say he's ever loved; how could he just throw that away dating someone else after she died like that? It felt wrong, somehow.

When he got married it was "til dead do us apart" so, what now that it did? He couldn't move on, no matter how much he tried. Even when his wife was dead he was struggling to process that he was a widowed man; whatever interaction he had with any woman for some reason still felt like a betrayal of his marriage. Like cheating. He was cheating on his wife who was no longer even alive. His daughter was motherless and he was a little bit of a coward. Many people had told him it was the grieving process and that the feelings would pass with time but they didn't feel like they were. He still teared up a little whenever he remembered that day when the stupid rain caused a stupid car crash that his wife wasn't even involved in yet got unjustly affected from the aftermath of the crash. Or when he got home and remembered he was one person short of a family. Yes, he had a daughter and furthermore a family to come home to, yet he felt... oddly lonely.

Was that normal? Was he allowed to feel lonely? How could he when she still had that child waiting for him at home and looking up to him, making him drawings and giving him hugs whenever she felt sad?

Maybe it was because he spent so much time working, or because his daughter spent a lot of time at her preschool, that it almost felt like it was just him. That he really was lonely.

So, fast-forward to a few months later, imagine his surprise when (before he could even realize it) you were part of his daily routine? It had become so frequent for his daughter to ask for your presence at school events or things like do her hair or just play together for a while that in a very short amount of time he found himself calling you over every weekend, and maybe making a little conversation with you while you were there. Then hours would pass and it would become a little too late for you to go home, so he'd offer you spend the night, and later inquire if you had dinner yet to make sure he had made enough food. The morning would come and with the moon hiding to let the sun rise you'd be gone as well; quick farewells before you rushed back to your own routine and his daughter would inevitably ask how much was left to see you again.

Then he'd chuckle at her impatience, staring at the door you just left through for a brief second.

And he'd say 'soon'.

[mantequillamcwhoremick]

Probably a common Kenny question but how do you think he'd react/feel if someone admitted to him that they're fully aware of his curse but never said or mentioned anything about it?

LMAO you've hit the spot hahahah I literally have an almost finished Fic Wip exactly about this topic so I've given it LOTS of thought.

Okay first and foremost: Kenny isn't a very reactive guy. He's pretty good at keeping his negative emotions in check, probably owed to his upbringing where he always had to be the sane, calm and collected one to endure his home life (parentification let's go!!!). Instances like in the Coon & Friends trilogy (where he lashes out at Kyle) are pretty unique and rare, the only other time he gets similarly angry and acts on it happens in "Poor and Stupid" where Cartman mocks both NASCAR fans and people in poverty.

Deadass when his friends ditched him for Halloween bc he couldn't afford a phone for the e-scooter (ep "The Scoots") he wasn't even mad, even though he had every reason to be. He was just sad. Similarly in Post Covid; he revealed he'd been pissed at his friends for giving up on their broship, but what did he do? He studied and researched for decades how to go back in time and fix it, and post-mortem he left the option open for THEM to continue his work.

My headcanon is that he tried and learned to be the calm one so Karen could have some semblance of stability in their home, but this situation you're describing wouldn't require him to stay strong for Karen (unless it's Karen that would remember his death). I'd say this is a pretty solid conclusion, drawn from his behavior in episodes like "The Poor Kid" and "The City Part of Town" (which ig are the only Karen and Kenny centric episodes lol). I still think (because of "Going Native" and how he handled Butters' emotional issues) that Kenny simply defaults to understanding and a rational caretaker role, no matter the person. Heck, he was even kind enough to leave Cartman his PSP (ep "Best Friends Forever") because he feels bad for Cartman's loneliness. If you have empathy with an IRL Cartman, there's no one you wouldn't be understanding with.

Having an analysis of Kenny's temper tendencies out of the way, I'm gonna move on to the next statement: I think it might slightly depend on WHO this hypothetical person was, the one who "admitted to him that they're fully aware of his curse but never said or mentioned anything about it."

There's two main reasons that this could even happen:

1: The person is so freaked out by this situation that they were afraid to say anything for a long time, they possibly even thought they might be insane and imagining things

2: The person is Cartman

And because I kinda analyzed this in my fic (not yet published), I'm gonna reference it a little and explain my decisions.

The fic's premise is that in a sudden turn, Butters remembers Kenny's last death. Butters freaks out when he sees Kenny come back and after initially lashing out at Kenny thinking he's a ghost coming to haunt him (like in "The Death of Eric Cartman"), he later apologizes to Kenny, concluding he just imagined his death and is insane. (Butters has been conditioned to not trust his mind & brain, assigned mental disorders when there's nothing wrong with him in the aforementioned episode as well as in "City Sushi", so I felt that this makes sense) This makes Butters a perfect contestant for scenario 1.

What did I have Kenny do? Well, in my fic Kenny is overjoyed to finally have someone that would believe him about his curse, but that's not the scenario you provided. But given Kenny's temper patterns and savior complex/caretaker tendencies (gestures at the entire Mysterion arc and anything to do with Karen, including the TFBW DLC "From Dusk Til Casa Bonita", and also "Going Native" where he swiftly accepts his role as support system for Butters), I find it pretty solid to assume he would show a lot of understanding for why the person didn't say anything before. It's a lot to digest to watch someone die, even more if they just... come back? And everyone else acts like nothing happened? On SEVERAL occasions?? Like, Kenny is the first to relate to that sentiment. He'd be understanding about everything the person would be confused & distressed about, and also the reasons why they didn't say anything before.

After Kenny gets his understanding & patient savior complex stuff out of the way, I imagine him slowly going insane trying to figure out WHY this person remembers. That's the second part of the premise in my fic; Kenny and Butters try to figure out why Butters remembers, and why now, and Kenny's main motive is because he wants to find a way for his best friends to remember. The Coon & Friends trilogy proves that Kenny is very distressed by Stan and Kyle not remembering, they mean a lot to him. He feels safer and more comfortable with them than probably with his own family. In my fic, his attempts at figuring out why Butters remembers end up with no results and Kenny slowly starts losing it, lashing out at his friends for feelings of resentment he had long buried and his rational temper control starts cracking more and more. I feel like this is how he'd react in any case of anyone remembering his death, as long as it's not Stan or Kyle. I doubt either Stan or Kyle would ever even wind up as the person to be aware of his curse and not tell him. Especially not Kyle.

Scenario 2 is if Kenny found out that Cartman remembers, has remembered since forever, and never said a word. In my fic (spoiler alert?) Kenny doesn't even deal with Cartman. He just goes straight home to pull out his gun and shoot himself lmaooo he does this because he wants to talk to Satan in Hell and demand answers, bc he doesn't know who else to turn to. In Chaos Plan I have a bit where I describe my take on Kenny's general feelings towards Cartman canonically showing signs of remembering his deaths, and the quote goes like this:

"Kenny often wonders if Cartman does remember his deaths, but is simply too much of a shithead to say anything about them." (Chaos Plan chapter 17)

Kenny is a big "Do no harm but take no shit" kinda guy when it comes to Cartman. He doesn't fight him when it's pointless and prefers to preserve his energy (unlike Kyle), but he does call him out on his bullshit occasionally (at least when it's targeted against Kenny and/or his family). Kenny is also scarily emotionally mature for a 9/10 year old (makes sense bc of his upbringing) so I doubt he'd get his hopes up about ever getting some kind of compassion or collaborative effort from Cartman to figure out what's up with his curse's mechanics. While Kenny and Cartman have an interesting friendship, and Kenny is kind of Cartman's soft spot, I can still imagine Kenny thinking "sure, my luck that the worst possible person remembers my deaths and no one else" and kind of be apathetic about it, kind of like he is by the end of the Coon & Friends trilogy before he shoots himself lmaoooo

So yeah, that's what I think :)) You said the question is common but honestly if it is, then it's for good reason because it's one of the most interesting ones the entire show of South Park has provided. I'm probably biased lol but still, thank you so much for the ask anon <3 I hope you weren't expecting a short answer ahahahahah

[steviebbboi]

Hi! Me again 😅 I have another request for Good For It Ari ❤️ Was wondering if you could do a proposal/marriage moment between them too? Wondering if there would be any angst/push back from the town at all/or like how’s the town feeling about now later down the road? Do they still like them or not? Thanks again ❤️

Hi hi again~ thank you for sending this in <3 i love this prompt too! it definitely made me think hard about how Lumberjack!Ari would propose given that his language is comprised of well-placed, intentioned grunts lol but i hope that i did it justice.

Pairing: Lumberjack!Recluse!Ari x F!Reader (Good For It)

Word Count: 1.6k~

Summary: How would Lumberjack!Ari propose to you?

You could read the original fic here.

Disclaimer: ***I don't give any permission for this to be reposted anywhere! Pls do not steal work, plagiarism isn't demureeee***

Reblogs help writers reach more readers who may also enjoy our work. As you like, kindly reblog~ <3

Warnings/Triggers: explicit detailed depiction of smut in a memory, lovie dovie softness, protective and mild possessive Ari showin’ up to wreck you. this isn't beta read, and most likely will read it over again to edit but wanted to put it out for ya'll to enjoy!

The cart wheels rattled along the road pavement as you walked into the store. You could feel some of the speculative stares already as you perused the vegetable aisle. 

Looking at some of the fresh veggie options, you could feel your heart thundering heavily and could feel the heat start to envelop your body underneath your clammy palms. Instinctively, you inhaled deeply to alleviate the tension building in your shoulders when you also start to hear the whispers. 

You were staring way too long as two identical pieces of squash when you felt the relief come in, “Should I give you three a moment alone?” 

Broken out of your dissociative gaze, you scoffed out a laugh while you turned and looked up to find Ari smirking at you. His frame towered over your significantly smaller one as your narrowed eyes met his affectionate glint. “No, you brute– we have concluded our meeting, thank you very much.” You teased back at him with a mocking smile. 

Ari only chuckled and put his burly hands on both of your shoulders and squeezed lightly. You could feel the tension slightly leave your body at his touch as you put your best pick of squash in the cart. 

Ari did his best to cheer you up whenever the both of you were out together. Even in the most mundane tasks, people seemed to still enjoy torturing you with their prying stares and gossiped whispers. Even though it's been two whole years since you started dating Ari, people still seemed to carry their weighted opinions about your relationship. 

The guilt that Ari carried for what happened at the mill has dissipated throughout the years– his feelings no longer diminishing your relationship together as you both worked it out a year ago. You tried to remind yourself that other people had no say or merit in the security of your relationship together. In all honesty, their judging natures have only helped you both grow closer together, never doubting each other’s feelings for the other. 

Classically, Ari’s protective nature only grew the more that he noticed the town’s critical disposition towards you in particular. He didn’t much care about their opinions of him, but when it came to you, he felt a heightened sense of defensiveness. 

You carried a light in his world that was unfamiliar to his own–he knew the significance of your presence in his life, he felt better and just good with you in his life. He would happily follow you to the depths of any sense of darkness. He understood that your sensitive nature has taken others’ criticisms more personally, but he also knew that he would never let anything come too close, or at least, close enough to jeopardize your relationship. 

You were a softness to protect, he cherished you, and utterly adored you. Ari would do anything to preserve that with you and in your shared life together. 

Not ignorant to the glances that people were extending towards your direction, he used his commanding physique to his advantage to narrow his gaze directly at those who were brave enough to send stares in the first place. Once they noticed his directive blaze, people would flush and scurry their grocery carts away in a masked hurry. 

Satisfied, Ari turned back to you and put an arm over your shoulder casually while placing a kiss on your hairline as you looked at him curiously. “Now, what’s next?”

Surprise bloomed in your thoughts as you noticed that the further you walked into the store, people seemed to deviate their intrusive stares away from you and Ari. Either you were getting good at avoiding them, or you were missing some sudden piece of information. 

Your thoughts were curious as you glanced over at Ari from the passenger seat. The breeze from the open windows graced soft wind through his locks, he looked so effortlessly relaxed and handsome. 

Eyes still pensive, you couldn’t help the small smile that grew upon your lips. 

Ari sensed your stare as he took a glance over at you before looking back at the road. Catching the inquiring glint in your eyes, he glanced back at you, “Everything okay, baby?”

Humming out an affirmative yes, you said simply, “You’re pretty.” A full smile graced your face at his typical responding grunt. 

You didn’t forget your earlier thoughts though and continued, “And you’re sneaky.”

Ari released his own slow hum this time that you quickly mimicked. “I don’t know what happened, but something did.”

He didn’t say anything even though you made your speculative tone obvious. He only gave you a soft smile and merely took his right hand off the wheel to extend an open palm. You narrowed your eyes at him again but took his invitation and put your hand in his. Once your palm met his, he gave you a gentle tug to pull you closer to him and you tucked yourself all small underneath his arm while resting your head on his shoulder. Ari’s calloused fingers stroked your exposed skin on your arm intimately while you both sat in silence the rest of the drive home. 

You knew how Ari oriented himself to shield you from the nosy outsiders scrutinizing your relationship. While you liked to think that you could handle it all on your own, you secretly enjoyed it when Ari protected you like this. There was just something about his guardedness that made you feel worshipped and cared for– on the flip side, it was also assertive and dominating. It was definitely dangerous, but that's what made him so alluring and even more attractive in your eyes.

Something told you that Ari knew that too. Your mind suddenly flashed back to last night– the room barely lit by the moonlight shining exposed through the curtain. Your legs bent over Ari’s broad shoulders which forced your legs open wider to accommodate for his weighted stature as he held you down for his gluttonous tongue that lapped and sucked at your soaking wet pussy eagerly, over and over again until you felt the day’s stress leave your body with each mind-numbing orgasm that he gave you. 

You cleared your throat as you felt your breathing shift momentarily, your body instinctively reacting to the memory as you fidget closer to him. It was like he knew what you were thinking as he released what sounded like a knowing hum at your movement and kissed your temple tenderly.

Finally reaching your shared house, you giggled as Ari took most of the grocery bags from the back of the car and ducked his head as he entered. The rest of the evening was spent cooking dinner together, a favorite pastime that the both of you loved to do. 

It was later when you were resting on the couch, both of you stretched out leisurely. You were unwinding from the day, already in your night clothes (you in your camisole and underwear and Ari wearing only sweatpants as you bullied him into being shirtless for the remainder of the night). Your legs entangled together with your head resting on Ari’s naked chest while he held you closer on top of him. He had one long arm wrapped around your waist while his other hand stroked and played with the back of your hair lazily. A calming and grounding feeling overtook your body at the sensation. Your favorite movie was on, but with Ari’s soothing touch and his soft heartbeat thudding underneath your ear, you could feel your eyelids getting heavier. 

A frown settled on your face when you felt a sudden weight and cooling feeling on your hand that was resting on Ari’s shoulder. Your sleepy eyes glanced up towards the limb and widened. 

There, resting on your left hand on your ring finger, was a simple silver band with a round stone just glimmering at you with how it shined underneath the warm light from the living room lamp. 

Not really registering what you were looking at, you rose up from your lazed position on Ari’s chest suddenly to pull your hand closer to your face. Almost as if you couldn’t get closer to it, you inspected the jewelry on your hand as if it was magic. Your shocked eyes met Ari’s equally sleepy and rested gaze as he took in your reaction humoredly. 

“Ari…what–,” you started with awe in your voice. Ari took your left hand away from your stunned face to bring it to his soft lips. Your breath hitched as he kissed the ring on your finger solidly.

“From the first day that I met you, I knew that I wanted you. To this day, even though I already have you, I still want you. But, I also need you.” Your eyes glittered with tears at listening to his affection-coated words. He would never really admit it, but his blue eyes also glittered with his own. 

“I love you. And, I think that you may need me too,” his deep-toned voice was rasp with desire as he continued, “if you’ll have me.” He placed another sincerely soft kiss on your ring finger and continued placing kisses up all over the inside of your wrist. 

His other hand wiped at the tear that fell and you grabbed his large hand before he could pull it away. There were so many things that you wanted to say but your voice locked in your throat. You took his large hand in your own to kiss his own ring finger softly with a whispered “yes.”

Ari’s mouth opened with his own gasp at the feeling of your plush lips on his skin. Hearing your tender response, Ari allowed his own gentle smile to grace his content faced expression as he pulled you down to clutch you desperately close to him. Pressing soft kisses on each other’s exposed skin periodically, you held each other for some time, your newly sparkled hand intertwined with his. 

A/N: AHHHH, their softness really just kills me. And the NEED argh, i wrote it and also dyin' from the sweetness of this drabble. pls let me know your thoughts, they are so welcome. <3 hope you enjoyed!

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[melodic-haze]

First off, congrats on being able to open up your request box again. In honor of that, I have a very personal request for you; Natasha. Just Natasha.

Just kiddin, I was thinking of the stereotype trope of: main character has a scary resting face but is actually just a nice person. Where reader has one mean bitch face and unnatural eyes that just brings fear sorta like Arlecchinos. This causes reader to get into fights constantly and needing to go to the only person that isn't scared of reader, Natasha. Always taking care of reader with her gentle smile, while wrapping the bandages of the people who started the fight a bit too tight for ones comfort. Reader slowly starts falling for Natasha and promises to help Natasha in anyway they could. Weather that be helping patients, managing the local kids when she can't, or even protecting her and her clinic. Anything to repay the kindness she has given them.

Have I ever told you I love Natasha? Yes? Well then you get to see it again. I love this women and would kill for her.

-🍎(I probably don't even need this for this one)

☆ — DEMO TRACK: Natasha x Reader

☆ — TYPE: SFW

☆ — CONTENT WARNINGS: Mentions of violence

☆ — NOTES: opened my req box but I didn't end up answering them until like idk months later LMAAIOAAOO but anyway idk dude I think you gotta prove you love Natasha idk I just can't tell like at all 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

It's a hard life, when you're unlucky enough to strike fear in the hearts of those around you DESPITE the fact that you want the complete opposite effect. Perhaps you jsut wanted to pay for some nice looking handmade phone case being sold at the street and instead the people audibly gulp and say that you can keep it just don't hurt me--

Needless to say, it's inconvenient

Yeah perhaps you just have a naturally mean-looking face, or maybe you're scarred for one reason or other. Your eyes are unnatural—freakish, even—and with how Jarilo-VI hasn't necessarily received a surplus of otherworldly visitors due to the otherwise uninhabitable climate, not a lot of people are gonna really.. welcome such an intimidating appearance with open arms 😓

People shy away from you because they're scared that you're going to fight them, and then there are some loons that approach you bc they DO want to fight you. This ends in two ways; either you know how to fight back to support your appearance and you beat their asses (which doesn't really bode well for your already kinda negative reputation) OR you DON'T know how to fight and you end up getting your ass beat

And so what do you do if you feel like you've been dropped down to the seventh layer of hell? You go to Natasha's clinic!!! Oh, but with your bruises and cuts and your natural look that has people running at the sight of you, your presence may not be appreciated in what people may consider a safe space (hypocrites, all of them really LOL). But that's okay!!

After the long day you've had and the thorough beatdown you've gained, you willed yourself to limp back home. Passing out on the street was not an option, and neither was going to a place where most people had often rested and had their wounds tended to.

In hindsight, it was probably better to bear the scrutiny and get yourself nursed back to health, but despite having dealt with it for the past several years you've been percieved as the lone boogeyman that terrorised the streets, you weren't willing to face any more today.

Unfortunately, however, your legs lose their stability and your body falls out of balance. And with you fighting unconsciousness, perhaps due to a concussion that you couldn't care less about, there was no hope on being able to--

But you feel someone hold your falling body, their grip soft yet undeniably strong. Consequently, however, that startles you awake and alarmed.. which also ends up with you falling on the ground from pushing the person away, albeit with a softer landing due to the interrupted fall.

"Oh! My apologies for giving you a scare, dear."

"Wha..?"

You look up and you see the Underworld's most trusted doctor, Natasha. But her presence is what doesn't catch your eye, not specifically.

It's the way her eyes look at you unblinkingly, as if you were a person with no societal defects whatsoever.

You had to look away.

"You seem to be in such a state," she gently chided as she bent down with her eyes inspecting not your face or your unnatural eyes or anything that may seem out of the ordinary, but rather the dozen injuries that litter your body from the beatdown you recieved, "times like these are when I would personally advise you to see a doctor, you know."

While her words are sensible, you can't help but shake your head, "And risk getting turned away? No thanks."

"I don't recall ever turning you away throughout this very interaction."

You look back at her, and you see soft magenta eyes staring unflinchingly at you with her hand outstretched. And for the sake of that sick, tentative curiosity in your head, you look back at her with your 'cursed' gaze in an attempt to see if she, too, felt a lick of fear and panic at the sight of you.

"You still could. You could turn around and run back to your clinic now—fat chance of me stopping you when I'm all battered and beat like this."

"And it is precisely because you are battered and beat that it becomes my duty to nurse you back to health as your doctor." Natasha holds her hand out closer and gives you a smile; a foreign, almost alien, look when it comes to being under the moon's serene gaze, "I can treat you at your own home, if that's what you'd prefer.. and you can refuse, of course. But I would very much like to help, if you'd let me."

"..Okay."

In the cold underworld devoid of all natural light, there is a bright spark of warmth as you tentatively reach for her hand and pull yourself up to her with a wince.

You guide her over to your house located at some hidden area that people don't tend to visit and let yourselves in, to which she guides you to a chair and basically glides along her path as she looks for a first-aid kit. When she finds it, she goes over to you and treats you so gently—her gaze look at you in such a motherly way, her voice is soft as she asks you questions, and the silence between you is comfortable

As she stays with you to tend to your condition, the both of you engage in small talk. It's mostly started by her, there's no chance that you WOULDN'T be guarded when you've basically been estranged by the general public your entire life, but then you get comfortable enough that it turns into a full-blown conversation between the two of you

When she leaves, your house just feels a bit colder. And as you recover from your injuries and reflect on the kindest woman you've ever had the opportunity to converse with, you swear to yourself that you'd help her in whatever way you can as a way of showing your gratitude

Everyone sees you out much more often, particularly circling around the clinic and even, god forbid, going inside. But the doctor sees you trying to tend to her patients' needs without disturbing them, playing with the children in whatever way you can (and they even start to come over to you to play after a while + Hook's approval, calling you an Honourary Mole), and scaring off anyone who would dare to disturb her and her clinic's peace

You often can't help but wonder about the discrepancy of the way you're treated by everyone else and then her—much as you were grateful, let's be real you'd be mildly suspicious as to why she basically welcomes you with open arms when nobody else does. Does she have an ulterior motive? Did she want something from you this entire time? Oh, but everyone knew Natasha and everyone knew that she was quite possibly one of the most earnest people in all of Belobog so maybe you're just overthinking!! And that still doesn't stop you from wanting to help her out in any way you can anyway, your gratitude ran deeper than your lingering distrust from all the similar distrust you were faced with

Over time you develop feelings.....though whether it's bc of how she may be one of the only people to treat you like a person rather than a monster with deformities, how she had swooped in and saved you that time (and maybe even times after that too), or how you just genuinely fell for her, who knows. Either way, you start noticing her well-kept hair despite the constant rush in the clinic, and the scent of her perfume whenever she passes you by and gives your arm a light squeeze as a form of greeting towards you. You pay even more attention to her soft-spoken voice that was so full of care and conviction for nursing her patients back to full health, and her careful yet expert precision with her hands as she handles her medical tools

No matter what she does, you stayed captivated by her. Not just because of her beauty, but the kindness she shows and the love she has over those around her.

Perhaps it was due to your lack of such warmth and affection as a result of your status as a feared outcast, but you found yourself greedy—wanting more. But you know you couldn't ask that of her, not when she considered herself responsible for caring for life within the Underworld.

Especially not when you get these occasionally quiet nights to yourselves, devoid of anything else but you, her and a fresh pot of tea.

You're well-versed on how these nights usually went because they were repetitive and comforting: the two of you enjoyed a nice cup of tea as you told each other of your current days and your past experiences before settling into a nice lull, the silence comforting as you sat next to each other. You still found it strange, how the doctor had opted to sit next to you rather than far, far away from you, but it wasn't like you were going to complain about the warmth that you're now growing to be familiar with.

Right now though, there was something.. different to the silence.

It wasn't as if there was anything out of place, but you had noticed that the way Natasha looked at you was different—it was filled with.. a different form of affection, the type that you were a complete stranger to.

It was only when she spoke up in the midst of your otherwise-comforting moment of mutual peace and quiet that you realised why.

"Do you like me, [Y/N]?"

It was a simple question, one you could easily say 'yes' to because of course you like the woman you consider as your first true friend.. but the way she muttered it with her voice just a hair's breadth above a whisper made you stop and reconsider.

"..Why?"

"Mm... A doctor's curiosity, perhaps?"

"Just a doctor's curiosity?"

"Maybe more than that too. Won't you be a dear and entertain my line of questioning?"

...

Though really, what was there to reconsider?

"..So what if I do?"

"Hm."

You get no further acknowledgement back, and so of course you think that's the end of the conversation.

But then you see her turn around to meet your gaze, unflincing magenta eyes staring right at your unnatural own despite its initial tendencies to categorise you as a monster, and she gives you the most loving look you had ever seen from her.

"I've found that I like you too."

"Even if I'm--"

"I like you, dear. All of you."

You hear her put down her teacup to focus in you, but you can't bring yourself to care about anything else.

Not when the both of you lean into each other's embrace and breathe each other in.

Not when the Beauty kisses her Beast as if you breathed life into her being.

I tjink when you finally get with her it's so funnt bc you'd essentially be the "she asked for no pickles" couple except it could go either way

You're like the adored doctor and her bodyguard and neither of you would have it any other way :3c

[herwritingartcowboy]

Hi! Can you make a Lyney x Reader where Lyney finds a pregnancy test and he asks Lynette about it but she declines that it’s hers (much to Lyney’s relief!) so the only other option is his partner (reader) and Lyney assumes the worst (since they’ve never done the deed before) So once reader comes home Lyney confronts them. But turns out the pregnancy test belonged to a pregnant cat the reader was trying to help (if that makes sense lol) Sorry if this sounds weird, I thought it was a little funny idea.

Fandom: Genshin Impact

Character(s): Lyney

Warning(s): bit of angst

Readers Gender: Female

Lyney didn't know what to feel when he found a positive pregnancy test. He of course got terrified thinking it was Lynette so he rushed over to her begging her to not be true. She was confused and asked him what he was crying about, "So your nit with child!?" "Huh? No".

He was relieved but now he stood there and was thinking, what other female does he know who might be pregnant. Lyney thought of you first but it couldn't be you two have never done "that" before and even after asking Freminet his mind started to wander, did you cheat on him?

So Lyney waited for them at home as anger and sadness started to fill his mind but it stopped when you announced that you were home. Right away Lyney stated to ask you questions about where you have been, who you were with, and more. "Since when did you become all the ones with questions?" "When I found this", Lyney handed out the pregnancy test to you and your eyes widened. Lyneys heart was broken when he saw, "Just tell me the truth, Who was it with and do you not really love me I could have given you kids and you should've just asked, please I don't want you to leave". Lyney said as he looked down and you just stood there very confused, "Wait you think I'm pregnant?" "Who else would it be! It's not Lynette and I know Freminet isn't doing those things, all we do is kisses and cuddles!".

After Lyney calmed down you spoke up again. "Well I did buy the pregnancy test but I didn't use it" "Then who is pregnant?".

You told Lyney to follow you as you ended up at some sort of Vet. And that's when Lyney saw a cat that you rescued days prior to this. "You used a pregnancy test on a cat?" "I was scared and I didn't know how to tell a cat was pregnant! But surprisingly it worked".

After a few more moments with the cat you both went home and when you guys got there you pulled him in for a hug. "Do you really think I would cheat on you" "..no..I hope not", you chuckled a bit as kissed on top of his head.

"I love you Lyney and nothing will change that" "I love you too Y/n" "Sooo about those kids you promised me". Lyney shot his head up at your face red as he started to stutter. Yeah your not leaving this man.

[ckret2]

How married are you to shapes carrying pregnancies at all? As opposed to other methods of making babies, such as spores or eggs or more outlandish sci fi options like parts assembly

Bare minimum, we know that shape reproduction needs a mother and a father.

I'm going to take it as a given that for Euclideans "mother" and "father" refers to "two individuals performing two different but necessary parts of a reproductive act to produce offspring," and not something like "they're totally not necessary at all but the government requires two people to sign up to co-parent before they'll hand out a baby" or whatever.

I'm taking it as a given because if I didn't, the contrary alien worldbuilder in me would go "well if mother and father are made up social roles rather than social roles derived from pre-existing biological roles, then why did they have to make up social roles that just so happened to be so similar to humanity's? I'm calling bull, bad worldbuilding, how dare you foist mom/dad pairs on a species that had no reason to develop mom/dad pairs as if we're supposed to just accept that that's the only NATURAL and NECESSARY way to rear offspring—" so I'm not giving my inner worldbuilder that option.

So, with "reproduction requires two different roles" as our starting point: at the moment, my own personal purpose in worldbuilding how Bill's species works is for use in the post-canon fic I'm working on that explores Bill's home dimension in flashbacks. That's what I'm keeping in mind when I worldbuild.

And I say that to give context to this: for my own personal purpose, my motivation is to worldbuild the way Euclideans' reproduction works in a way that ISN'T so interesting that mentioning it in fic will cause the readers' imaginations to immediately veer off the plot and focus on that detail. I'd rather how they do the do to be unremarkable as hell.

Anything mentioned about Bill's homeworld in the fic is put in either to explain who and what he is and why he's that way, or to sprinkle in a jazzy little bit of flavor. I'm trying to avoid turning his species into a deep exercise in alien speculative biology, since that doesn't mesh with the vibes of the story I'm telling. (As I say this i'm covering that "which shape sexes are reproductively compatible" chart with my body so you can't see it. I said I'm trying to avoid getting deep into the biology, not that i'm succeeding lmao. I'm too interested in how Bill sees his gender.)

Every aspect of Flatland was worldbuilt specifically to comment on the horrors of contemporary Victorian society, even the stuff that surprises readers that don't know much about the Victorian era like "well surely the stuff about irregulars being euthanized or poor babies being stolen and given to middle-class families is a dystopian invention," and anything that DOESN'T serve the social satire is handwaved away with "we have a very interesting way of propelling our bodies but unfortunately I don't have time to talk about it." Bill is written into Gravity Falls to be a foil to every member of the Pines family and to show what they could be like without love, trust, support, and family. That's the same role I want Euclydia to serve in my fic. Anything that diverges from rather than reflects Gravity Falls' contemporary society is out of place.

Putting in something like "eggs" or "spores" opens up cans of worms. How would laying eggs make their society different—are they less attached to their own kids, is trading eggs around and pre-hatching adoption more common, do people steal a neighbor's egg and leave their own? If it's spores, is it even possible to identify your own kid, does anyone care to, do kids ever just spawn out of a rotten log in the forest that spores settled on, are babies self-sufficient since they might be born without an adult nearby? These are fascinating avenues for some great alien worldbuilding! However I'm currently motivated to keep alien worldbuilding to a minimum lol.

In truth, I'll probably never need to know or explain HOW the shapes reproduce—pregnancy, eggs, spores, ritualistic magical waltz, collaborative geometry homework, whatever. Taking time to explain it means talking about details that aren't relevant to the fic, and the ghost of Edwin Abbott Abbott would sadly shake his head at me. However: if I don't explain reproduction, and if it requires two roles, most people are gonna default to assuming pregnancy. I can live with that.

All I need to figure out is how the two roles in the Two Roles Needed For Reproduction are assigned—like, can every member of the species automatically perform both roles at any time? (I don't wanna do that.) Are they born performing one of the two functions? (I don't wanna do that either, because now we've just invented a new male/female sexual dichotomy.) Does which you perform depend on your sides, the one with less sides does X and more does Y? Does it switch seasonally? Does it switch based on your age? Does it switch based on the number of each shape in the local population? Etc. (I'm not attached to any of these ideas, they're just examples.)

And the only reason that's something I need to figure out is that that could affect how Bill thinks about himself and his identity. Like, if which role you perform switches based on the amount of similar shapes in the local population, then it would have some kinda impact on him knowing that his body's been locked into the Lmao There Are NO Other Triangles Nearby role for the past trillion years. If it switches based on your age, then the fact that he never got old enough to switch would be one of many examples of the way his biological age has been in stasis since his dimension was destroyed. Etc.

[cy-cyborg]

I'm begging dragonage fans to do a tiny bit of research about arm amputees before loudly shouting their opinions on the inquisitor returning in the next game Please lol.

Apparently, it was confirmed that the inquisitor, your chatacter from the last game (who looses their arm in the final cutscene of the DLC), will return in Veilguard as a customisable character, similar to Hawke, and they will play an active roll in the story. This has caused a lot of people to start speculating on how they'll handle the inquisitor's missing hand, with most people agreeing they'll have to have a prosthetic to be an active part of the story. Which, while I do think this is the rought bioware will take, isn't true, and a part of me really hopes they leave the inquisitor without a prosthetic arm like in the end of Tresspasser

Partially because we already have a companion with a prosthetic (neve) and it would be nice to see some diversity in how amputation is depicted in such a mainstream game, but also because you dont need a prosthetic to fight as any of the main 3 classes from inquisition.

Mage:

mages just need a staff, the game shows them as 2 handed weapons but it's totally beleiveable that it would be usable 1-handed (Neve also uses a dagger-like weapon in the trailer, you can make a "staff" in inquisition that functions more like an energy sword, and the Mage in the chargers uses a staff resembling a bow, so I think it's more that they just need a focus, the shape doesn't matter as much). A knight enchanter may struggle more 1 handed, but I wouldn't write it off as an option with some modifications made to their main staff.

Warrior:

the easiest to justify, because there are several cases of arm amputees fighting with a sword and sheild in history, and while many did have prosthetics, most weren't functional (meaning they were mainly for aesthetic purposes and didn't actually aid the fighter in any way. There were exceptions, like Götz of the iron hand, who's prosthetic was functional, but most were not). The inquisitor looses their arm just above the wrist*, so they still have most of their forearm. Most sheilds strap to the forearm, so it wouldn't take much adjustment to make that work, and you can use the other hand for the weapon. Obviously, two-handed weapons will probably be off the table, though, lol.

*edit to say, as several people pointed out, i got that wrong, my bad 😅. The inquisitors arm is actually amputated through the elbow, the screenshots i was looking at just weren't very clear and it has been a while since i got to trespasser lol. It would still entirely possible to strap a shield to the upper arm though, with some pretty minor adjustments to the existing straps on standard (as in, those used by non-disabled warriors) tall shields, so the point still stands.

Rogue

this is the one people tend to be the loudest about and the one I understand the most. Obviously duel-weilding daggers won't work (unless you give them something like the hidden blades in assassin's creed on their stump side, I guess) but using a single dagger still would, and is a perfectly reasonable approach, given that's how most irl people used daggers. Archery, though, absolutely can work without a prosthetic, despite what people think. Dragonage has crossbows, not something like Bianca (rip) but a small, single-handed crossbow is an option. Even ignoring that though, amputee archery is a thing irl, and not every arm amputee uses prosthetics for it. The bows are modified to be held in one hand and drawn with the mouth using a kind of pully-system built into the bow that I could very easily see being modified into some dwarven-style contraption in game (some double arm amputees use their feet to draw regular bows, but I don't think that would be pheasable in combat).

Like I said, I think bioware will probably go with a prosthetic, but i hope that they don't. Or at the very least, show them with it sometimes and without it other times (the same goes for Neve, no one wears their prosthetic 24/7, I'd love to see them both take them off around the home base, even just occasionally). A lot of arm amputees in particular prefer to go without one, and arm prosthetics in media are some of the worst offenders of the "perfect prosthetic"/"miracle cure prosthetic" tropes. It doesn't count as "diversity" or disability representation if it doesn't actually change anything other than the look of the chatacter, and im really, really desperate for some actually decent amputee representation in games.