#'its been a long time' 'its been too long... friend' AND THEN THEY KISS
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xalygatorx · 1 day ago
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*cracks knuckles*
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"This." | Alastor x Reader, First Kiss
Summary: You convince your new(ish) partner, Alastor, to give kissing a try.
Warnings: None apart from the tiniest mention of a bloody lip. Just fluff that gets a little steamy at the end.
Word Count: 3.8k
A/N: Dedicated to @6esiree, her follower celebration challenge, and all the scrumptious stories she's crafted for us. x
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It had taken a little convincing on your part. After all, the idea of kissing wasn't romantic or enticing to everyone. In fact, when you broke down the actual mechanics of the thing, you had to agree that it was a bit bizarre.
In the end though, he'd agreed to humor you. At least that's what he'd said. But you could see it in your partner's eyes—he was curious.
And now you were sitting cross-legged on the Radio Demon's bed—a bed he'd only procured after you'd started seeing each other and his lone option to (politely) cohabitate with you came in the form of your suite, which had several tenants in the form of void-staring Squishmallows. Especially considering he often preferred to stay up and read while you slept, it was the one scenario in which he preferred not to have an audience.
The Radio Demon, himself, sat across from you, subconsciously mirroring your body language and awaiting your next move.
You couldn't help but think, as you studied him both recreationally and to look for any indications of discomfort, that your journey to this point had been almost comical in its unlikelihood.
At the base level, it made very little sense. After all, you were more like Vox in a lot of ways than you were like Alastor—tech-savvy, excited about new gadgets and caught up on the latest memes, and absolutely rife with Gen. Z slang. Angel had been certain after you'd arrived at the hotel and stuck around long enough to make a few friends that the second Alastor realized he not only wouldn't get your soul from you, but he'd also have to deal with your shenanigans on top of everyone else's, he might decide you'd look better flambéd with a side of rice.
He hadn't thought that though, apparently. And you'd absolutely annoyed each other at first, mostly for a misfire in communication due to your highly conflicting eras and expectations, but he'd admitted to you much later—after a courting proposal he'd had planned to the letter had still gone sideways anyway, again because of you (allegedly)—that this wasn't completely true. He found you annoying, yes—which was fine because he annoyed you sometimes, too—but part of that annoyance came from how utterly fascinating he found you, too.
Alastor, at his core, didn't subscribe to the idea that vulnerability was worth a damn in the grand scheme of things. He liked it in others—subservience from the masses and warm pink blushes from you—but he expected more from himself. Vulnerability equated to weakness and that was something no overlord could afford in his mind. So his immediate response to feeling anything on the softer side for you had at first been met with utmost resistance.
He'd tried ignoring you. Not only was he miserable for the duration of that due to missing you—a realization the Doomsday District had subsequently suffered for—but you drove him up the walls when your initial hurt at being shunned turned to unbridled annoyance and an ever-increasing demand for an explanation.
He'd tried "friendzoning" you. That had initially worked and then royally pissed you off when he used the actual term he'd apparently learned from Rosie a long time ago. You'd informed him with bared fangs and gusto that your friendship was not and never would be a consolation prize and stormed off to your suite. Then you'd ignored him—for four days precisely. When you'd finally given him the time of day, he'd shown up with an armful of apology gifts and a wobbly smile he'd never admitted to wearing since.
And then he'd just spent the next leg of knowing you very confused about why nothing he'd tried had worked and why you being upset with him upended his world so completely. You'd caught him lurking at the edge of gatherings, fully honed in on you with an intensity that felt like he might be dissecting you with his eyes. You'd thought he'd found another reason to be angry at you until he'd approached you a week later and admitted the complete opposite.
That, loath as he was to admit it, he was drawn to you and it was doing neither of you any favors for him to keep lying to himself.
And you'd realized in that moment, too, that part of why his "rejections" had made you so angry were because…well, you liked him, too.
Because, for as haughty and selfish as he was, he also took great pains to go out of his way for you. He looked at you like you were the only person in the room regardless of whether it was actually true. He was timeless in his strange, enigmatic way that was so very much, innately him. A way you'd come to like quite a lot. The bigger L-word was on the horizon, but you'd shelved that thought whenever it had arisen. Not only were you worried you'd scare him away, but you worried about spooking yourself, too.
Your focus pivoted as one of Alastor's ears flicked back, a silent subconscious display of his nerves. He was still watching you, measuring you with a look that managed to show his age and still look boyish simultaneously. His crimson eyes were open, flickering over your face with unease hidden behind a thin smile. When your pensive expression faltered into something affectionate, he huffed a little breath out that made his shoulders relax just the slightest bit.
"Well, dear?" Alastor wondered. His tone was just shy of a purr and you had a feeling he was trying to put up a bit more bravado than he currently felt in the face of something he wasn't as versed in. "You seemed quite intent earlier on getting me alone. Where's your moxie gone?"
"It's still around," you laughed. "Just a little nervous."
He blinked owlishly—these more vulnerable expressions were possibly the ones on him that you adored the most. The youth it smoothed over his sharp features almost made it possible to see what he'd looked like while alive. You would've never met him in life—decades on decades had ensured your separation—but it was a nice thought.
It would've had to have been in your time though. Even though he would've been miserable amidst all the swanky new tech (at least until you talked him into trying a podcast probably), you would've been more miserable trying to acclimate to the mold women were expected to fit in his era. You'd asked him once why he liked you, given just how different you were from what he'd likely grown up with, and after he'd finished laughing at your question, he'd just dropped a chaste kiss to your cheek and said he'd never been partial to dolls and found your spark far more entertaining.
"You are nervous?" Alastor asked, his smile wavering just slightly as he tilted his head. "What ever for?"
"Well, sweetheart, it's been a minute for me, too," you said with a helpless little shrug that made his features soften even as his frame seemed to tense again. "And, well, after asking you to humor me, I'd hate to mess it up."
Alastor scoffed a little and wordlessly turned one of his large, spidery hands palm-up to offer to you. Without hesitation, you took it in both of yours, running the pads of your fingertips over the ashen grooves and sharp points of his knuckles. You both watched your hands traverse his for a moment before he spoke again.
"…I must admit I wouldn't know if you did, cher."
It was your turn to look surprised. "If I did, what?" you asked, wondering if you'd been that distracted just by the opportunity to touch his hand or if there was something you'd yet to learn about him.
"If you…'messed up'," he said, borrowing your slang. The stiff, experimental way he said it made a bloom of warmth expand in your chest. How was such a feral, sadistic sort of demon so unbearably cute sometimes? You'd hardly wondered the question before his ears slowly swiveled to flatten against his hair, his smile wobbling again as he rolled his eyes away and sighed. "I expect, given our newfound partnership, I can anticipate a layer of confidentiality here tonight?"
You frowned. "If you're asking if you can trust me, the answer's yes," you murmured, mirroring his head's tilt with yours. "Is everything okay?"
Alastor smiled genuinely and gave your hand a light pat. "Just fine, darling," he said and you noticed his face looked a little flushed.
Had you ever seen him blush? God help you, now that you knew it was possible, you wanted to create that crimson hue on his cheeks as often as possible, he was precious!
"This is a first for me," Alastor finally said, sounding like he'd half-blurted it out just to get past his own pride or anxiety.
"Can you, uh, be a little more specific?" you asked, not wanting to embarrass him, but wanting to know what exactly he meant in case it changed your approach. You gently stroked his hand, hoping it came across as a soothing gesture. He could get grumpy in moments like this, taking comfort as coddling and acting all the more irritable for it after. "I'm just worried about overstepping, I'm not trying to wring anything out of you."
Alastor chuckled and shook his head. "No need to overexplain, dearest. I appreciate the attention to detail," he admitted, still choosing to stare down at your hands or the baseboard off to the side rather than meet your eyes. His ears hadn't yet lifted from their station against his head. "…Kissing. At least lips-to-lips. I never cared for the idea—I'm still not entirely sure I do now—and so I never entertained the practice."
You felt both blessed and terrified at once as you asked, "…You've never kissed anyone?"
Alastor's lip curled a little at your shock. "Please do refrain from making a scene over this," he requested with an exasperated huff.
"We don't have to try this, Al," you hastened to tell him, your fingers tightening around his hand but still leaving him room to pull away if he wanted to. He seemed to notice and the snarl in his smile smoothed away with a silent bit of gratitude. "If you're not interested, it's totally fine."
He gave you a skeptical look. "And you would simply abide by never kissing your beloved?" he asked, not sounding like he believed it a bit. "By feeling as though your partner does not want you?"
You pursed your lips—well, it stung a little when he put it like that, but that wasn't where your mind had gone. "Quit putting someone else's words in my mouth," you mumbled and that put a dash of chagrin on the Radio Demon's pinched expression. "I come from a much more flexible time than you do when it comes to this stuff. I knew you were ace before any of this, even before we became friends—"
"What now?"
You couldn't help a fond, breathy laugh. "Ace. Asexual," you elaborated. "Generally uninterested in sexual stuff, or at least not interested in the way most people are. It's normal. There's nothing wrong with that."
Alastor's ears flicked uncertainly. "I'm afraid I've garnered a much different perspective all these years," he said. "Which was perfectly fine until…well."
"It's still fine as long as we're happy," you said. "That's all there is to it."
"It sounds much easier than society made it seem in my lifetime," Alastor sighed, giving your hand another couple of pats. A silent thanks. His eyes narrowed an increment as he, at last, met your eyes again. There was no mistaking the warmth their vermillion glow sent through you. He studied you, that curiosity lingering, as he murmured, "I would still like to try. For you, dear."
You smiled. "Thanks," you said softly. "Just…no pressure, okay? We never have to do it again if you hate it or for any longer than you want to. I promise, now that I know to prepare myself, I won't be offended or hurt if you decide you don't like it."
That seemed to be the root of his unease and it made your heart give a squeeze. Evil as he liked to think he was and, in fairness, was to most, he had a soft spot for you. One you relished curling up in. One that already felt like home.
"This…stays between us regardless, yes?" Alastor murmured. "Not that it particularly matters in the grand scheme of things, but I have a grave feeling that this is something that idiotic picture box would never let go if he caught wind of it. I loathe the idea of simply offering ammunition on a platter."
"It stays right here," you promised. "Just with us."
Alastor hummed his approval and adjusted his sitting position on the mattress. "Lovely. Now…how do we go about this?" he asked, businesslike in a way that was almost comical. It was all you could do not to laugh lest he take it the wrong way in this moment where he didn't have the upper hand.
And, to be honest, his question was valid even if it did seem a bit silly. You'd never done this with someone before. Teaching someone how to kiss felt like such a momentous occasion. What if you were a bad kisser and you'd just never known because what was the gold standard for kissing?! Of course there were do's and don't's and cardinal sins, but…what made a kiss good?
You weren't sure, but you wanted his first one to be good. Perfect even, if you could manage it.
"Well," you said thoughtfully, giving your lips a nervous lick. You blushed when you saw his eyes drop down and follow the pink tip of your tongue along the seam of your mouth. You had his attention at least. "You've kissed my cheek. You can kiss someone's lips that way too. So let's just start with that."
Alastor's ears finally perked back up. "Simple enough!" he declared, seeming pleased that he wasn't being offered the deep end before being sure he could swim. "Well then…shall we?"
You smirked and shuffled a little closer, giving his hand a squeeze before letting it go to cautiously cup his cheeks. "Remember…at any point, if you want to stop—"
"I will say something, my dear," Alastor said, his ears flicking back again as his confidence faltered anew. "Or tap your arm a few times perhaps if you've got me in too tight a chokehold."
You laughed. "I'm not going to stick my tongue down your throat, for fuck's sake," you griped through a series of giggles.
"Language," Alastor scolded you despite chuckling a bit, himself.
In part to shut him up now, you closed the gap between your lips—mindful and slow, you kept to your original suggestion and simply pressed a polite, succinct peck against his still-smiling mouth. Afterward, you drew back just a little to get a read on your partner, finding his cheeks a little redder than before. And his eyes, uh, a bit wide.
"You okay?" you asked.
"I am," Alastor said, seeming a little surprised at the fact. "Why, that was hardly unpleasant at all!"
You snorted. "Hardly unpleasant… I can work with that, I guess," you mused.
He tsked at you and rested his hands against yours, which were still cradling his face. "You know very well that isn't how I meant it," he chided you. "It was pleasant. Unexpectedly so."
"Well, good!" you said, pleased he'd found it nice. "I'm glad. Did you want to keep it just at that?"
Alastor contemplated you for a moment or so and then contemplated your lips specifically—your face heated as he subconsciously wet his own.
"I could perhaps be a bit adventurous… If you're up for the task," he suggested, that curiosity lingering and shifting into something a little darker, it appeared. Wishful thinking maybe, on your part.
"I could be," you flirted back, pondering your options before suggesting, "I'll…well, I guess I'll just go until we stop—either because you tell me to or…whatever. Okay?"
Alastor shifted a little as he said, "Very well. On this particular dancefloor, darling, I follow your lead."
You couldn't help but tease him a little.
"You're a very cute old man, you know," you informed him. And, right as he was about to fire back, you slotted your lips against his, effectively finding the one way you'd encountered thus far to silence the Radio Demon.
You couldn't help a slight giggle when you heard the vinyl screech of a stalled record erupt from the air around you or possibly from his microphone propped up against the bedpost. Keeping to your word, you went slow, starting with a gentle brushing motion before offering a touch more guidance as you increased the pressure and friction by a hair.
Alastor was following, clumsily, but seemed to get his bearings little by little as you took the two of you through this ritual the way he'd once guided you both through your first waltz. You demonstrated the little nuances you'd learned in life as you went—the interval opportunities for breathing, the different sensations of brushing vs. sliding through a liplock, and where hands could rest unobtrusively when kissing was the sole activity in the cards for the evening.
Yours had remained cupping Alastor's cheeks and his had slid down from covering your fingers to loosely encircling your wrists. You'd assumed he'd left them there to free himself once he'd had enough—the way his quiet, ambient static had climbed to white noise around you had made you think he was nearing his limit—but he had yet to pull away or signal that he was done.
In fact, unless you were mistaking his body language through the hazy, dopamine-riddled fog you existed in now, he seemed ever more interested in continuing rather than stopping.
Alastor, more confident with the cadence of the kisses you shared and the way he could best move his mouth to match yours, nosed in closer when you started to lean back, thinking you were doing him a favor by allowing him some room. A disgruntled sound rumbled in the base of his throat when his nose bumped into yours, something you thought was cute but he was currently viewing as either a failure or an obstacle to what he wanted.
You smiled against his lips and used the cradle of your fingers against his cheekbones to gently angle his head—you tilted yours in kind to afford him the closeness he was after. Alastor gave a soft hum of approval as he nuzzled in again, successfully this time, and ran his hands down your forearms as the pads of his thumbs—with claws carefully angled away—skimmed the soft, delicate skin of your wrists all the way down.
Experimentally, you chanced a gentle suck against his lower lip and the cross between a low groan and a bleat that he allowed you to swallow between kisses made you shiver with delight.
It caused a reaction in him, too, apparently. In seconds, your world had tilted a full 90 degrees and you were on your back, soft scarlet quilts beneath you and enamored, lovedrunk Radio Demon on top of you.
There was no slow-and-steady now, not now that he had the idea of what he was meant to do and found himself comfortably, securely lost in your mouth, your softness, your scent. For Alastor, kissing someone on the lips had always been an alien, strange, unwelcome sort of act—no longer. Now he could only wonder how else he could get even closer to you, how completely he could be engulfed in the feelings you stirred in him when you were alone together and the Hells outside his door—your door now, too—ceased to exist until morning.
He couldn't even find it in himself to be embarrassed about the little cervine sound that had bubbled up from his throat when you'd so innocently yet salaciously tugged at his lower lip. That was filed away for another time, for now all that mattered was you.
You'd since lost your composure under the heat of his full attention. Your fingertips had traversed past the sharp lines of his cheeks toward his hair, gently tangling in the crimson and black-tipped locks that hung in short curtains around his face as he bowed over you, consuming you more surely and more thoroughly all the time.
Overzealous, he briefly and only once caught your lip with the edge of one of his lethal teeth—he'd lapped the bead of blood away, mumbled an apology, and proceeded to kiss you through the clotting, enjoying his taste of your essence without causing you any extra, undue discomfort.
When finally you had to break for air, you filled your lungs and looked up at Alastor, admiring the sparkle in his eyes and the disheveled state of his usually pristine appearance. Again you thought you were glimpsing not just the buck you'd fallen for, but the man he'd been long before you'd ever existed. You smiled—who would've thought you could feel lucky to be dead?
"Safe to say it's not so bad?" you asked, smirking a little when you heard how breathless your own voice sounded.
Alastor chuckled and straightened, plucking you up from the bed and bringing you with him. "Yes, indeedy, darling," he admitted, kissing your cheek as he admired your plush, kiss-bruised lips. He tutted a little at the tiny split he'd caused but seemed to take it in stride. "Was it… Was I alright for you as well?"
Your expression softened. "You always are," you murmured, tilting your head back to kiss the tip of his nose. "But yes. You're a very quick study."
You felt his chest puff with pride. "Why, of course!" he boasted with a haughty chuckle, back to the Radio Demon you knew (and loved). "Certainly couldn't be too hard a thing to learn, after all—the rabble and then some have seemed to figure it out just fine."
Expecting him to humble-brag you into oblivion, you simply let him marinate in his success—at least until he surprised you yet again. It seemed to be something he was inclined to do often and you couldn't complain. Especially when his surprises tended to, for you, border on a saccharine sort of sweet. Not that he'd ever admit to it.
Alastor smiled warmly down at you and bravely leaned in to press another, shorter kiss to your lips. "Thank you, ma cher."
You blinked. "What for?"
He hummed in consideration before murmuring simply, "This."
A look into his eyes told you that "this," wasn't simply a kiss or a conversation or any particular moment in isolation. It was all of those things though, all at once. The smile you shared was part of it, too.
And the countless tender moments that hadn't happened yet would be part of it as well.
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mywritersmind · 12 hours ago
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ALL’S FAIR IN LOVE AND WAR - LN4
↳ pt.1
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summary : Its the vacation of your dreams! With your best friends, rich men, live music, and flowing drinks, nothing can ruin it. Even if a certain Formula 1 driver (who seems to have an affinity for annoying you) is there every step of the sandy way.
listen up : suggestive themes! swearing! ‘enemies’ to lovers. probably my last sunny vacation fic for a while! get ready for winter fics!! cmt if you want a pt. 2 <3
word count : 4570
⋆。‧˚⋆
“Y/n!” Kika throws a pillow onto me. I groan in response, pulling the blanket over my head, “Get up! Get up! We’re leaving in thirty!”
I fall off the bed and start my rushed process of getting ready, we’re in Marmaris, Turkey for a little holiday. A holiday that I've been promised is for friends, yet every friend I have is with a man.
Kika, Alex, Rebecca, and Lily promised they would act like single ladies with me! That’s clearly not true because of the love they have for their boyfriends and how those same men never leave their sides.
The only other addition is someone I don’t want to talk about. Someone who’s a pain in my ass and the construction to my headache.
I’m instantly in a better mood when my friends and I start taking photos and making tik toks. I’m in a light blue dress and sandals, my skin is practically yearning to be tan but that will start tomorrow.
I have my own hotel room which I intend to spend no time in unless I'm hooking up with a hot turkish man. Lily holds my hand as we start walking. The guys said they would meet us there and I’ll never not treasure time with my girls.
The sun has already set but the sky is still a dark blue and orange. Lily squeals next to me, she’s in the cutest white mini dress, “I can’t believe we’re here!”
Kika laughs in a long yellow dress, “The trip literally made it out of the group chat!”
I eye them, “More like it was infiltrated by another groups chat!” Alex laughs and puts her hand on my arm.
“I promise it’ll be fun. I know you’re a little sad but we’ll find you someone!”
“It’s not even that- I just want to be with you guys.” They all seem a bit sad about it. It’s not like I don’t like their boyfriends, I consider them my friends too! It’s just that I was really looking forward to some much needed girl time.
“You are with us!” Alexandra frowns.
Lily swings are hands, “You’re with us and five other idiots who have money!”
This makes me laugh as we make it to the restaurant. It’s beautiful, part of the hotel, and looking right over the water.
The guys are already sitting. Charles, Pierre, Alex, Carlos all smile at me, kissing their girls as we sit. There is one missing, though. It’s hard to ignore but I'm definitely not complaining.
Drinks are ordered and our thoughts about the hotel is passed around. I became friends with this group through Lily, we grew up together and when Alex suggested I should come to a grand prix, I was hooked.
The other girls took to me immediately and were so excited to have another friend that they actually like. I don’t travel as much as them, but I do see them often enough.
We haven’t gotten together in a group like this though in forever!
I sip on my cocktail and talk to Carlos as his eyes stray past me. I turn to look at what he’s distracted by and have to fight the urge to roll my eyes.
You know those people who just really piss you off? The type that just irks you even though you’ve tried to hear your friends out?
That is how I feel about Lando Norris.
He strolls up to our table as if he isn’t late. He’s in blue jeans and a white button down that’s definitely not buttoned enough. His hair is messy and looks like he just woke up, “Hey.” Is all he says before plopping down next to Carlos and sipping his water.
Rebecca already sends me a look that screams, ‘Leave it.’ So I do, I order my food and talk to my friends while avoiding the man two seats down from me.
It’s not just that Lando bugs me, It’s that he’s repeatedly cocky and flat out annoying. He teases me any chance he gets and it never fails to ruin my day. He knows it too.
“What’s the plan for tomorrow?” Pierre asks as he puts his arm around Kikas chair, everyone’s food is nearly gone and I'm more than ready to climb into my plushy hotel bed.
Alex holds Lily’s hand, “Beach, explore, eat? That’s also my plan for every day of our trip.”
Charles nods, “My buddy has a boat out here that he said we can borrow one day.”
I smile and lean my head on Kika’s shoulder, “I'll be anywhere you guys go, with a book and an apple.”
“You still into that?” His voice already pisses me off. I look at Lando who’s staring at me, “Reading.”
I blink. “Are you still into being illiterate?”
Charles covers his laugh with a cough as Alexandra shakes her head, “Hey! You two need to keep it civil this trip.”
Carlos eyes Lando pointedly as he groans, “Why? I didn’t even do anything! The witch said I was illiterate!”
I sit up straighter immediately, leaning over Carlos as my friends talk in a haze around me, “You really wanna see a witch, Norris, I’ll fucking show you!”
“The worst thing you could do to me is throw sand in my face!” I groan as he rolls his eyes and Kika pulls me back into my seat.
“This is what we’re talking about!” When she whispers is when I realize the people dining around us are staring.
“It’s one week!” Pierre shakes his head, “One week of peace!”
I don’t dare look at Lando, my arms crossed.
He gives in peace, “I won’t start anything if she won’t.”
“Perfect, I'll have a great trip of silence.” Fine by me. I can ignore him for a week, easy.
Lily and Rebecca exchange looks as Lando speaks again, “It’ll be nice not hearing your-” Carlos slaps his arm and he shuts up.
I sigh in my seat, this is going to be an interesting week.
⋆༺
I start off my first full day with breakfast. I’m up early and decided to make the most of it by enjoying my food with a beach view.
I grin when I see that there’s two pieces of bacon left, grabbing them swiftly and plopping it onto my plate just when someone goes to reach for it.
I look up to see Lando. He’s sweaty and in running clothes, looking at me annoyed per usual, “Seriously? Who takes the last two pieces?”
I raise a brow, “Me. You literally just saw me do it.”
He gives me a bored expression, “Didn’t you ever get taught manners?”
“I got taught how to get what I want.” I bite into the piece of bacon just to watch him flinch. “Weren’t you taught that it’s not nice to be insufferable?”
“Can’t you share? It’s one piece.” I take another bite, pretending to think.
“Hm… No!”
“We’re supposed to be civil. Friends even!” He steps closer, “I know you would give the piece to Lily.”
“You’re too greedy.” I finish the first piece of bacon and start to walk away. He scoffs and follows me.
“Me!? Greedy?” He scoffs, plate still in hand. I eye it, it’s mostly empty except for a nutella crepe, “You know what- never mind.”
I nod, “Great job being civil, Norris. I’m so proud of you and you for giving up.”
He does not find this funny, “I can’t stand you.”
“Then sit.” His eyes narrow at my words.
“Fuck it, Free will!” and with that, he grabs the piece of bacon off my plate and runs!
“Norris!” I yell after him but when he turns, he’s smiling with a mouth full of bacon. “Dickhead.” I mumble to myself and continue getting my food.
⋆༺
I’m warm, I'm tipsy, and I'm listening to live music. I don’t think life could get any better. I sit up on my beachside chair, lifting my sunglasses to see Lily, Alex, Charles, and Alexandra playing chicken in the water.
Kika stirs next to me, she was asleep on her stomach but slowly sits up when she hears our friends laughing.
I watch Lando and Pierre floating and Carlos swimming towards them. Rebecca went to get drinks so that just leaves Kika and I.
“How’s the whole ‘civil’ thing going?” She’s in an orange bikini that makes her look unfairly tan.
I shrug, “Bad? I just can’t imagine talking to him normally. We always fight.” I sip my drink, the glass coats my hand in condensation but it cools me down.
“Maybe you should just fuck.” I choke on my drink. She doesn’t even attempt to hide her laugh, “Sorry, Sorry!”
“Kika!” I slow my breathing, “Why would you say that!?”
“It makes sense! You’ve got a lot of pent up energy… I’m just saying!” I shake my head, pulling my sunglasses back on and laying down again. “I know you’re attracted to him.”
I pray that she thinks my cheeks are red from the sun, and not from her words. “I am not.”
“You can't lie to me!” She laughs, “It’s not a bad thing, Y/n. You both just need to shut up for two seconds and get eachother shirtless.” Lily walks up right as she says that.
She plops down onto the sand, “Whatever this is about- I agree!”
“She’s trying to get me to- Nope! I’m not even going to say it!” I can’t have that manifestation in my life.
“I think she should hook up with Lando.”
“Completely agree. Just make it quick.”
“If he’s with her, he’s gonna be quick.” Kika jokes and I actually laugh at that one.
“Okay enough! I’m not taking any advice from you two!” I stand, pulling my hair tie out of my hair and starting down the beach.
“Think about it!” Lily yells as I flip her off.
Now all I can think about is hooking up with him. I mean, I hate the dude, but I’m not blind.
Lando is fucking fit. But it’s hard for me to see past his assholeness. So the probability that i’m going to fuck him, is slim. Very slim. Like ZERO.
Just as I'm off in my Lando Norris shirtless world, a shirtless Lando Norris walks up to me. He’s exiting the ocean, pushing his wet curls back as he laughs with Carlos.
I look away as soon as I get a glimpse of his torso. The cool water feels great on my legs as I walk in the ocean. I sink down and dunk my head, opening my eyes underwater, I see the tiny fish and shells.
I reach down and grab a handful of sand, when I get air again, Carlos and Lando are next to me. I push the sand off my hand to reveal some shells and a tiny crab, “Aw!” I smile at it, showing it to the boys.
Carlos raises his brows, “Looks harmful.”
“Harmful?” I glance at him, “He’s a baby!” I hold it closer to him and he backs away like it’s going to jump on him.
I turn to Lando and do the same, he backs away as well, “Pussy.” I say it to his face and he clearly takes it as a challenge.
He holds his hand out and snatches the crab right from my hand, “Are you just a thief by nature?”
He gives me a look before bringing his hand closer to his face to examine the sea creature. I step closer to see it, “It’s adorable.”
“It’s a crab.”
“Thank you, Norris, for your insightful words of wisdom.” I go to take it back from him but he jumps and throws his hand down.
I let out a huge laugh when I realized it’s holding onto his thumb, “Shit! Ow!”
I keep laughing as Lando panics, swinging his hand around to try to get it off. Carlos is long gone by now, not amused by his friends' antics.
The crab finally unclips itself from Lando and he looks like he was just betrayed. I grin, “Maybe I am a witch!”
He looks me up and down, holding his hand and thinking. “If you call me a bitch that crab won’t be the worst thing that hurts you today.”
And then something weird happens.
He smiles.
He just smiles and walks away.
⋆༺
LANDO
Marmaris is stunning. The water is clear and besides me getting bitten, I'm having a great time. We end up going into town to get lunch and I'm faced with the issue of Y/n’s ass in my face as we walk up what feels like a million stairs.
I really feel like she’s doing this on purpose but I could be thinking that to just make myself feel better about checking her out.
She’s in tiny low waisted jean shorts. I can see her bikini bottoms peeking out from the sides. Her top is a crocheted cover up so her sliver of a bathing suit is still on display.
Carlos pushes my back when I slow down on the steps, I turn around to swear at him but he’s giving me an all knowing look so I close my mouth.
After what feels like hours of staring at Y/n’s backside, we make it to the lunch place. It’s hidden quite far up and we all get cramped into the room with a huge window and a view of lemon trees.
With our stupidly coupled up group, I'm forced to sit with Y/n. She’s across from me, sipping on her water and leaning on the table with her arms crossed.
When she notices I'm staring at her, she glares at me. I can tell she’s about to say something snappy, but eyes our friends and shuts her mouth.
As much as she pissed me off, I find it fun to annoy her. I like the way her cheeks heat and how her lips press together, but I would never admit that to her.
“Did you go for a run this morning?” Carlos asks me while shoveling food into his mouth.
“Yeah and the gym- it’s nice.”
“And quiet?” I nod, knowing what he means. Five Formula 1 drivers on vacation together is pretty hard to miss. But besides a stare or two, no one has said anything to us.
Lily claps her hands together, “Who wants to go golfing with me on wed-”
Y/n groans, putting her head in her hands, “No!” Kika looks horrified at the suggestion as well.
“Yes!” Carlos and I say at the same time. Lily has been a great addition to our golfing group and by far the best out of the three of us.
Rebecca laughs, “I’m with Y/n on this one. I’m feeling… spa?” This immediately perks Y/n up.
“That sounds perfect!” Alex smiles, “Girls day! Minus Lily because she’s actually good at a sport.”
Charles eyes us all, “I wanna go to the spa. I hate golfing.”
⋆༺
YOU
When Rebecca suggested we take a cooking class, I thought it was a great idea! I’m not the best cook so why not learn something? I had a bad feeling as soon as we entered and the room was decorated with hearts.
“Welcome! Welcome!” A man ushers us in along with two other groups. The room is large with one wall completely open and facing the beach. “Everybody get a table and we shall begin!”
“I knew I missed something on the website…” Alex cringes as we stare at the tables set for two, “Sorry? Lando, careful with Y/n and knives!”
A couples cooking class!? You’ve got to be kidding. I look at Lando the same time he turns to me, “Well, love… Let me handle the sharp things. I value my life.”
This is going to be the longest hour ever.
“My lovely people in love!” The man is short, with gray hair and the biggest smile I've seen in a while, “My name is Ali and today we begin making the dough for Kemal Pasha!” Apparently the kind we’re making is sweet balls of dough with a very delicious sounding syrup.
I’m standing next to Lando who’s struggling with his apron. They have huge heart pockets and his is bright green. As fun as it is to see him struggle, I want to start cooking soon.
“Give me that.” I swat his hands away and step behind him, taking the pieces of fabric and tying a knot.
“Thank you, Sweetness.” I suspect that this teasing won’t end soon, considering the man teaching the class asked everyone what their names were and put a name tag on each table of the couples ‘ship’ name.
I tie it tight and he flinches, “Hey my girl is trying to kill me!” I roll my eyes and loosen the bow, listening to the man and thanking the woman who’s walking around to make sure everything is correct.
I pour in all the ingredients and Lando starts stirring. I look around at all the couples, they’re doing everything together while looking all lovey dovey.
It makes me miss my ex. Which is weird because we barely acted like this alone. But still, seeing Alex and Lily laugh with flour already on their faces makes me sad.
“Angel!” Lando calls for me again as I put my hand on my hip. He has his hand out that’s covered in white powder, “C’mere!”
“No!” I back up but he’s already pulling me in and squeezing my face. I frown, my face squished between his hand as he laughs. I can feel the flour covering my face. I put on a slow smile when he drops his hand, “Aw, love bug!”
Nothing about my tone is loving and I can tell he’s not excited by the way his face drops. “Now darling…” He backs away as I pour some of the flour from the container into my hand, “I told you i’ll let you lick food off of me later, not here!”
I scoff at his audacity and throw the flour right into his face. When he opens his eyes, I slap my hands over my mouth. His whole face is white and when he breathes out, some comes out of his mouth.
I hold back a laugh as he stares at me, along with the rest of the room, “Oh baby… you’ve got a little.” I motion to his whole face, “Just a little something right there.”
“Er…” The man blinks at us, “True love comes in many forms!” He laughs uncomfortably as we get back to mixing our dough.
“That was not a fair move, Love.” Lando whispers to me as I knead the dough between my hands. His face is wiped off but the flour still resides a bit in his hair and cheeks.
“All's fair in love and war.” I say sweetly.
“Alright ladies, If your man isn’t helping you with his big strong muscles…” Ali eyes us, “Remind them who you are! Men, help your women!”
I turn back at Lando, looking up at the driver, “Do you need reminding?”
He just bites his lip and turns me back around, his hands on my waist. That, I did not expect. My hands go back to the dough in the bowl and his arms move into view, copying the other couples and massaging the treat with me.
I swallow and eye the veins in his arms that go all the way to his hands. His very big hands. The same hands that softly reach over mine.
His touch is surprisingly gentle as he matches my movements. I try to not think about how close he is to me, and focus on the dough but fuck that because I can feel him behind me.
I move back a bit unconsciously and his hand goes to waist to stop me, “Do you need reminding?” His voice is deep in my ear and I fight the urge to roll my eyes even though I know my cheeks are hot.
I thank god when Ali says we will be moving onto rolling the dough into little balls.
I swiftly move away from Lando and don’t dare look at Alex or Kika who I know is looking at us. I start rolling the dough in between my hands.
Lando glances at me, his balls sort of uneven and too small, “Your balls are ugly.” Lando chokes on air and whips his head around to look at me.
“Excuse me?” I roll my eyes at his suggestive tone and show him one of mine, “Ah so you’re a ball expert? Working from experience?”
He’s so childish it makes me want to throw one of these at him. Sadly, I'm not above acting suggestively, “Never worked with any so small.” I shrug as he stares at me. That shuts him up really quick as we place them on a round baking sheet.
We take a short break while they bake and I venture outside, looking over the balcony to the sea far below us.
My skin feels rejuvenated by the sun, I’m tanner and I swear the air is just different here. Alex appears next to me, he looks quite happy, “Having fun?”
I shrug and realize that I actually have been. “Uh… yeah.”
“You know, I think everyone else thinks you’re a real couple. It’s cute.” I gape at him. Is Alexander Albon betraying me right now?
“It is not cute. He’s bullying me.” He just snorts.
“Sure…”
I frown when Ali calls us back in. Lando and I are mostly quiet while stirring our syrup. As it boils, he nudges me. I look up to see him watching another couple.
They’re practically making out and feeling eachother up. I let out a laugh that his eyes widened at, “You’re so not inconspicuous.” He whispers, leaning down a bit.
“They are definitely not paying any attention to me…” They’re so wrapped up in each other that they don’t even notice when Ali turns their mini stove top off so their sauce doesn’t burn.
He looks down at me one last time, sending me a tiny smile. I think it’s the first time I'm genuinely attracted to him when his shirt is still on. Shit.
⋆༺
LANDO
Besides Y/n trying to kill me with the dessert we made, we were civil throughout the rest of the class. We get to take home a small box which leaves everyone in a good mood.
“Here, pretty, I don’t think I can eat that without feeling sick.” I don’t mean to call her that, but I just say what comes to my mind. I hand her the box and takes it without any change of expression.
I’m ready to leave but Ali claps his hands together one more time, “My lovebirds!” Y/n gives me a look that I laugh at, “One more gift for a very special couple of… well, couples!”
He pulls out three pieces of paper. Handing one to the couple that was making out he says, “Most affectionate!”
Then he turns to Pierre and Kila and hands them one, “Best dessert!” I realize these papers are some typos of superlatives.
I think he’s going to go to Charles and Alexandra, but he turns to Y/n and I. A big grin on his face, he hands me a paper. I read it before he says it and my eyes widen, “The most authentic love!” I don’t look at her, I can’t.
“I hope one day you all come back!” And with that, we’re ushered back and stripped of our aprons.
Y/n is already walking down the marble steps with Lily and Rebecca next to her. Carlos just shakes his head and slaps his hand on my shoulder, “Man… Congratulations!”
I eye him as Alex laughs, “I’m framing that!”
⋆༺
YOU
Six hours later, i’m in a tiny white dress, my hair curled and makeup done, and on my way with Rebecca and Alex to a club.
Everyone’s already left but Alex took extra long to slick back her hair. “So!” Rebecca grins as we walk past the beach, “Plan for tonight? Hook up with a local? Make out on the beach?”
I laugh at her enthusiasm, “I’ll see where the night and vodka takes me! I really just need a hot dance partner and a good drink.”
And that’s exactly what I get. I get my drink and well.. many hot dance partners! My friends and I scream the lyrics of the songs we know, holding hands and jumping around.
The club is part of the resort we’re staying at. It’s half on the beach and half in the beach bar that has a 24 hour drink service. I laugh at the guys who are awkwardly waiting for their girls to join them again.
“Okay, go, go!” They leave me at the bar and as soon as they’re gone, a man approaches me.
He’s very tall and very blonde, “Hi.” he’s got an accent but I can’t tell from where, “I couldn’t help but notice you dancing…” I listen to the same line that a hundred guys have fed me before. “Could I buy you a drink?”
Now this is what I like! Ten minutes later I'm dancing with him and a vodka lemonade. His hands are on my waist as I laugh.
He’s hot against me, his hair sweaty and salty. His name is Leon and he really likes my dress. I have a feeling he would like me without it too.
“Are you staying at the hotel?” He asks, screaming in my ear.
I nod, “Are you?”
“I’m staying in town with a friend!” I nod and sip my drink as he talks, “Do you know him?” I frown at his words, turning to see who he’s talking about.
I roll my eyes at Lando who’s standing with a pretty girl but staring at me. I turn back to Leon, “No!”
He looks like this annoys him, “Well i’m not surprised! You’re hot!” I nod as the music continues and keep dancing with him.
He turns me around so he’s staring at my ass instead of my face. But I just slip my fingers into my hair and keep dancing. I open my eyes to see Lando again. The girl is still talking but he’s still staring at me.
I run my middle finger around the rim of my glass, the sugar lifting onto my skin. His expression stays dark and focused on me as his hand goes to his jeans pocket. I lift my finger to lips, licking off the sugar without breaking eye contact.
He brings his drink to his lips and that’s when I realize I've had a bit too much to drink because he looks too damn hot.
He’s in a light blue shirt, his silver rings and LN4 necklace sat on his skin like it belongs there. His hair is damp with I don’t know with what… sweat, water, or the air, I don’t care. His jaw ticks at Leon’s hand moves from my waist to my stomach, my head dropping back on his shoulder, and spinning back around.
He kisses me, it’s messy and drunken but I don’t care. It’s only when he whispers, “Let’s get out of here.” When I'm massively turned off.
I end up back with my friends, Lando nowhere in sight and a smile on my face as we sit at the bar and drink.
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auclairedetoru · 14 hours ago
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“This has been y/n and Satoru, thank you so much for watching, bye!”
The moment they reached the greenroom, y/n's smile drops. God, her cheeks hurt, nobody talks about how hard it is to fake a smile all day, it's like a workout for your face except you gain nothing at the end.
Her co-star walks in behind her, a cocky smile on his face. If she was him she would get tired of herself. How can someone be so egoistic? He loves himself more than his own mother loves him. Every second she's in his presence, she feels herself losing brain cells and getting gray hair, and as much as she loves silver locks on other women, she does not want the cause of it to be Gojo Satoru.
“Great job today, everyone! Y/n you could've been a little more cheerful toda-”
“Shut the fuck up.”
She plops down on the sofa and rests her head against the back of it. They still have one more interview left to do, so she's forced to tolerate that dumbass for a couple more hours, and it's a recorded one so she has to pretend she likes him too.
Why did she choose to become an actress again?
Right, childhood dream, worked hard for it, blah blah blah.
“Whoa! Careful there, tiger! Someone might be filming and you don't want to ruin the season before it even starts.” Gojo smirks, eyes glinting with mischief as he continues to push her buttons.
The people in charge decided to promote the filming of the new season of their show to remind people of it and get them excited, not that anyone was able to forget the last two seasons. According to the statistics, people love a slow burn story, especially when it stretches over multiple seasons. Yes, that does mean y/n has been stuck with Gojo as her co-star for three years now, as known as the longest three years of her life. Everyone around her tells her that time is passing by too fast, but it's been the opposite for her.
She's dreading this season the most. It might be the last, but it means the story will finally reach its long-awaited climax, which means her character and Gojo's will become more than friendly.
She doesn't even want to think about it.
“Leave her alone, Satoru. You still have one interview left.” his manager scolded him making the bright blue eyed man pout like a four year old not getting the candy he wanted.
The fact Gojo and y/n can't stand each other is something known only between them and their close staff, not even the director and producers know that the "chemistry" between them is something they make up on the spot and doesn't come naturally at all. They're surprised no one has figured out they don't like each other in any way, but y/n takes that as a compliment because it means that she's a really good actress who has perfected her craft and is able to fake getting along with a menace like him.
After touch ups, she goes to where the interview is being held, greeting the staff on her way and telling them she's excited to be working with them. Gojo smirks at her from his seat as she makes her way to sit on hers next to him. She mirrored him to keep up with the "we're best friends behind the scenes" thing they somehow built for themselves.
“Why are you looking at me like that?”
“Can't a man admire his friend and co-star?” he teases, milking the hell out of the act they put on for the camera. Y/n wanted to roll her eyes but instead she forces out a laugh and takes her seat.
She ignores the way her heart flutters at his words. No need to focus on that.
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A few months into filming...
“Alright, everyone!” the director calls out as he claps his hands, “Cameras rolling, sound is up, let's do this.”
Ah yes, the most important scene of the entire franchise. The first kiss scene. This is what the show has been leading up to, this is the moment everyone has been waiting for, this is the thing y/n has been looking forward to the least, in fact, she has not been looking forward to it at all, she wishes it wouldn't happen.
The scene takes place at her character's apartment, a place the set design team has made so cozy looking she wishes she could curl up and take a nap on the couch. Gojo's character is her coworker and he's coming to check on her because she disappeared from the office party after seeing him flirt with someone. That's when she confesses that she's been pinning over him for years and he confesses back before pulling her into a kiss.
“Okay you two,” the director looks at them, “not to put you in any pressure, but this is the most important scene of the entire show. All your hard work has led up to this moment. Satoru, you're the one leading the kiss, remember that she's very vulnerable and heartbroken, so you need to be gentle and soft, she's the person you love most so you're gonna handle her with the most care. Alright? Here we go!”
The apartment door closes between y/n and Gojo as the clapper loader steps in and holds the slate in front of the camera, “episode 11, scene 45, take 1!” they call out before snapping the clapper shut and stepping back.
The director pauses, glancing around one more time to make sure everyone is ready.
"And... Action!”
Y/n steps into character and hesitantly opens the door. Her expression shifts to shock as she sees Gojo standing across from her, hair and clothes disheveled. “What are you doing here?” her voice is a mix between surprise and hurt, just as the script calls for and just as they rehearsed. Gojo's eyes soften, exactly how he was instructed.
Yes, she can't stand him, but that doesn't mean she won't admit that he's really good at his job. He's not one of the most sought out actors for no reason.
“I was worried about you, you left so abruptly.” he says, letting his eyes dance all over her face only to catch her wet cheeks and red eyes, and no, it isn't makeup and fake tears, she spent half an hour before filming started watching "soldiers reuniting with their dogs" videos to get to that point.
He moves to cup her cheek, but just as scripted, she steps back, her expression flattering. She starts to remind herself of things that make her emotional to start tearing up, “I-I'm fine, you can leave.”
Gojo stares at her a bit longer than he's supposed to, but she blames it on his love to suddenly improve, and not that he's admiring her or anything, not like she wants him to admire her, that would be crazy on her part.
"You don't have to hide from me," he says with the same soft tone.
She tries to hold back the tears to keep up the strong and always optimistic personality her character is known for, and after a moment she allows a couple to flow down her cheeks. Gojo's face morphs into a concerned expression.
“I don't like seeing you with someone else,” she mumbles, her voice breaking with every word that slips out of her lips, “it hurts me, right here,” she taps on her chest with a shaky hand.
Gojo's eyes widen to feign surprise, a perfect mix of confusion and disbelief on his face, playing the oblivious character to perfection, “you... You like me?”
“For the longest time,” she sniffs, her voice thick with emotion as she starts opening up, “I held back, I tried not to make it obvious, but i can't anymore.” She drops an octave to deliver the last line, showing as much vulnerability and pain as possible.
There’s a pause, and everyone on set is on the edge of their seat. They could feel the tension between them, the two playing their roles better than what everyone imagined from reading the script. Gojo goes to take a step closer, stopping half way.
“Can I kiss you?” he asks, his voice shaking to show that his character is feeling nervous. The director looks intensely between the scene in front of him and the one on the screen, making sure that the intensity they feel in the room is accurate on camera to what's happening in real life.
It's her turn for her to be surprised, playing unsure and hesitant, not expecting those words to come out of his mouth, “w-what?”, her voice trembles as her eyes search his face like she's trying to find any uncertainties.
“can I kiss you? Please?”
Gojo takes the step forward. His voice is soft and his gaze holds hers, intense yet tender, leaving no doubt that his character has been lounging for this and wanting it for just as long if not longer than her.
Y/n takes a deep breath. This is it, she's about to kiss Gojo Satoru, the person she despises the most. She hopes it won't be awkward, the scene was going smoothly and the last thing she wants is a retake from the top, she also doesn't want to embarrass herself in front of the whole crew and become the topic of their gossip.
After a small pause, just as instructed by the director, she gives Gojo a small nod. Gently, and hesitantly, he cups her cheek as he brings his face closer to her. The nervousness on her face is mostly real and she doesn't know why she's feeling that way, she wants the scene to end already.
The moment their lips touch, something surged within Satoru and his free hand quickly grabs her waist to pull her closer to him. Did she always smell so... Devine? Why are her lips so soft? Is her lip balm candy flavoured? Why does she taste so sweet? Why can't he pull away from her?
The kiss is supposed to be gentle, a tender moment of affection, yet the way his hand was gripping the pajama top she's wearing betrays his character's intentions. But the way his thumb caresses her cheek is the opposite, grazing the warm skin softly like he's handling a little kitten. He knows he’s supposed to pull away now. He wants to. He needs to, for the sake of this scene. But something holds him there and it's making him not care about the script anymore.
It’s only when he feels a gentle squeeze on his arm that he finally pulls back. He looks down at Y/n, her lips slightly swollen from the kiss, her wide eyes bright with a spark that stirs something deep within him, making him want to lean down and kiss her again.
“cut !”
The pair jumped away from each other. They both forgot they were on a set, filming a show, and not in the comfort of their own homes.
“that was just... Wow,” the director shakes his head with a smile, “Satoru you went a little out of what I told you with the kiss, huh?”
“yeah, sorry,” he smirks with fake confidence, acting like his heart isn't beating faster than a racing car, “I just thought the moment needed that intensity, ya know? He's been waiting to kiss her for so long after all.”
“No I agree, you did the right thing. Go ahead and take five, everyone. This is one of those rare times when there's no need to do multiple takes, the first was perfect.”
Y/n lets out a breath she didn't realise she was holding and quickly leaves to go grab a water and get some fresh air. She can't believe what just happened. That was definitely not a normal kiss, it felt too real. What was Gojo thinking!? Why didn't he stick to the script and kept it short? And why did she like it so much? She's not supposed to! She's supposed to hate him and everything he does.
“Y/n? Can we talk in your trailer, please?”
Fuck... Please don't let that be Gojo, please let her ears be mistaken and it's not his voice asking her to talk in private, please-
She turns around, and it's him. He stands there, hands tucked into his pockets, looking a little... Shy? Since when does Gojo Satoru feel anything less than bold and confident? There's an unusual softness to his expression, one she only sees when he's playing his character, but without the little voice in the back of her head reminding her that he's just acting.
Despite not wanting to talk to him, she still nods and follows him to her trailer that wasn't parked far away from where they stood. She lets him in first and closes the door behind her to ensure no one can hear whatever they're about to talk about.
As they stood across from each other, Gojo's eyes dart everywhere except to her face, something he has never done before. His usual bravado is gone and replaced with an unusual hesitance. She watches him with a puzzled look on her face. Why is he acting so out of character? It's as if he's nervous to talk to her.
Eventually though, he opens his mouth.
“I apologize for going out of script during the kiss. I didn't plan it to happen and I'm sorry if it made you uncomfortable.”
Now he's apologising? Okay, something is definitely wrong. Gojo has never apologised to her in the three years they've been working together. She is starting to feel nervous herself.
“It's okay, really,” she crosses her arms across her chest, “like you explained to the director, it's what you felt the scene needed, and I respect you as an experienced actor to know what you're doing.”
“That wasn't my reason, though.”
Her eyes nearly bulge out of her skull. Huh?!
“what ?”
He takes a step closer to her, a look on his face she couldn't describe, “that's just a lie I made up on the spot. I felt a pull when our lips touched, I don't know what happened to me and it's driving me mad,” he runs a hand through his hair, a habit his manager told her he does when he's anxious, “I couldn't stop myself, so I just let whatever it is take over, but I still couldn't stop, I tried but I just couldn't pull away and I— I want to kiss you again! I want to kiss you right now!”
“Gojo, calm do-” her words fall on deaf ears.
“No! You don't understand! I want to kiss you, but you hate me! You can't even look at me without being disgusted, and I keep making it worse! I keep showing the worst version of myself around you and it makes you hate me more and-”
“Gojo! Stop!”
The look on his face is breaking her heart. He seems so desperate, struggling to put his feelings into words, but every attempt only makes him more anxious, his words stumbling over each other as he tries to make her understand.
“I don't hate you, Satoru”, his heart flutters at the sound of his first name coming out of her lips. Even in interviews, she always used his last name, this is the first time he hears her call him Satoru, “I hate how you act when we're together behind the scenes. You're always so sweet to everyone but I'm always the one you tease, and sometimes your teasing hurts.”
“I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. It's just- I've liked you, as a person, before we even started working together, and I treated you how I treated my close friends. I didn't realise I was overstepping boundaries.”
Why is it so easy to forgive him? It must be something to do with the blue I'm his eyes, it holds some sort of spell that makes everyone want to be on his good side.
“It's okay, as long as you own up to your mistakes and don't repeat them, I'm willing to see past it all and start new.”
A huge smile takes over his face, content with her answer. He is so happy, he's been wanting to do this for so long. He knew he wronged her and needed to apologise for his actions, but he never knew how to approach it.
Without warning her, he lifts her up in a hug. A squeal left her lips followed by a melodic laugh as she hears him thank her over and over again. She allows herself to enjoy the warmth of his hug. His fans didn't lie, he is really good at them.
He pulls away enough to look at her face without unwrapping his arms from around her, “Can we start new by allowing me to take you on a date? I promise I'll treat you like the princess you are.”
She feels her cheeks heating up with a blush as she nods, unable to hide the small, shy smile tugging at her lips. Gojo grins wider, his eyes lighting up with an unmistakable spark of excitement and something tender, “can I kiss you again? Please?”
She barely finishes nodding before his lips are on hers. He’s smiling into the kiss, unable to hide the joy bubbling up inside him as he realizes his newfound feelings are reciprocated.
And yeah, she did like him more than she let on. The small crush she had on him before they met definitely didn't disappear like she thought it did, instead it stayed hidden away and came back out when she felt his lips for the first time.
She never expected this nor planned on letting herself fall for The Gojo Satoru Charm™, but with him here, holding her close, and pressing a kiss filled with passion on her lips, she realises maybe, just maybe, she’s been wanting this all along.
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The ending looked way better in my daydream lol. Hope y'all liked it still 💕
132 notes · View notes
jakedustry · 2 days ago
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𝐌𝐔𝐍𝐂𝐇 - 𝐒𝐈𝐌 𝐉𝐀𝐊𝐄
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drabble
wc 1k+
warnings f!reader, oral (f. receiving), vaginal fingering, overstimulation, marks/hickeys, mention of m! masturbation
↪ izzy adds... everyone say thank you to my best friend for sending me this idea one fine night so that I could wake up to a paragraph about how he'd eat me out because that's what made me write this
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It wasn’t that long since you started dating Jake Sim. You started as friends – best friends even. When he first came into your math class, you weren’t paying much attention to him. Honestly, you were too busy trying to figure out where your other classes were to even notice him, but he caught your eyes a few weeks later when he decided to sit next to you. At first, you only exchanged a few smiles and short greetings, but after a while, he started asking you questions, trying to get to know you. 
After that, it only took a few more weeks for him to become your best friend. And now, just a month ago, he managed to gather all his courage and ask you out on a date, confessing he had those intentions from the moment he sat next to you. You couldn’t say no to him then, and that hasn’t changed since then. How could you when he was the one to show you what love feels like?
“What’s up?” You wonder, looking down at your lap where your boyfriend rests. He is lying on his stomach, his head on your belly, absolutely unfocused on the movie on your TV. “Nothing,” he mumbles but doesn’t look up to meet your eyes. “Jakey,” you say, cupping his cheeks and making him look up. “What’s on your mind?” 
“You are,” he answers, making you scoff. “I mean it,” he looks you straight in the eyes before looking down again, his fingers playing with the hem of your pants. He mutters something under his breath, but you don’t manage to catch it. “What was that?” You ask, your cheeks flushing red the moment he looks up, flashing you the cutest puppy eyes you’ve seen yet. “W-What?” 
“Do you think I could eat you out?” He repeats his question, this time louder, with more confidence. You could never say no to him, and he knew it. But honestly, you didn’t even want to tell him no. 
The excitement in his eyes as he sees you nod is unbelievable, and before you know it, he is pulling your pants and underwear down. You’re embarrassed. You try to hide your face behind your hands, but Jake is quicker, holding your hands in his to make sure you see him. “I promise I’ll make you feel good.” 
“That’s not what I’m worried about,” you shake your head. “We’ve never– you know, you haven’t– and–” you try to form a meaningful sentence, making your boyfriend laugh. He pulls himself up to face you, tugging your hair behind your ear before he cups your cheeks. “I know, I know,” he whispers, his eyes full of assurance. “And we don’t have to do anything until you’re ready. You can stop me whenever you want, and we can pretend nothing ever happened. I don’t want to rush you. I’ve just been wondering how you’d taste,” he caresses your cheek, pulling you in for a kiss to prove he means everything. 
You don’t want to see your face because you know you’re as red as ever. But Jake doesn’t seem to mind a bit, carefully moving down again and making himself comfortable between your legs. You watch him place your legs on his shoulders, smiling at you to assure you once more before his attention shifts to your lower lips. 
He starts carefully, his tongue making its way from your clit down to your needy entrance. He takes his time with everything, making sure every lick of his, every movement he does, is as perfect as ever. He can’t rush this; he keeps repeating to himself. 
Jake keeps glancing up at you at first, wanting to see your reactions, but he soon gives up on that, too, diving in completely and focusing on his movements instead. 
“So good,” Jake moans, tongue-fucking you. Your head is thrown back, your hand in his hair as you cum for the second time. At this point, you don’t even know what he’s saying. He started blabbing stuff when you came for the first time and haven’t stopped since. He moves slightly up, sucking on your clit while his fingers make their way to your hole. You gasp when he inserts his middle and ring finger, lazily fingering you. Your legs shake, but he doesn’t stop. It’s as if he was in his world, on cloud nine, just because he can eat you out. 
His free hand wraps around your thigh, still trusting his fingers into you as he looks up at you. “You’re the best,” he mumbles, placing kisses on your inner thigh. “So good, I could do you forever.” You don’t get a chance to answer. Before you can even think of a response, his tongue is sliding between your folds again, and you’re unable to speak. Forget a dessert, this was the whole meal for him. 
“Jake– Wait, I can’t– not anymore,” you cry out, letting go of his hair, and it’s like something in him switches, looking at you immediately, his eyes full of worry. “What is it, baby?” He asks, completely frozen. “‘S too much,” you admit. “I can’t anymore.” He sighs in relief, slowly moving his fingers again, as if he didn’t hear you at all. “Is that so?” He coos, sucking on your inner thigh this time, and you’re sure it will leave a mark. “One more, please. You’ve been so good,” he praises. “Please, pup.” 
“Last one, though,” you agree, giving him a warning look that, however, only makes him chuckle. Jake returns to his job within seconds, leaving hickeys and marks all over your inner thighs while he fingers you before going back to sucking on your clit again. This time alone, though, his free hand doesn’t end up anywhere on your body, but instead, he uses it to pull down his pants, freeing his aching cock. 
His moans get louder as he palms his cock, pulling his fingers out to focus better. The praises from before turn into incomprehensible whines of lust and groans of your name, driving you crazy. 
It doesn’t take much longer for you to cum on his tongue again. Even though you thought you didn’t have another one in you, he managed to prove you otherwise, releasing all over your thighs soon after. His breath shakes as he falls on you, embracing you in a hug, as if this was just another one of your cuddling sessions. You’re both a mess, but you couldn’t have enjoyed this more. “So good,” he mumbles again before he sucks on your neck, leaving a hickey there too. “My girl tastes so good.”
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omiangelic · 3 days ago
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shared moments (dabi)
a handful of shared moments between you and your maybe more than friend, touya todoroki, the flame villain.
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this is a prequel to the first fic i posted, pheonix, but it could be read as a standalone !
wc: 2.8k
reader is not described but is implied to have a quirk that makes them colder. i also imply that they're a nurse who frequently works with burn patients, including dabi's victims.
cw: 18+ ONLY !!! no smut, just kissing, grinding, and shirts come off but it ends pretty quickly after that. dabi accidentally wounds reader (a small burn from trying to wake him from a nightmare), mentions of abuse, murder, dying, and nausea. soft yet emotionally stunted and avoidant dabi
playlist: maybe by flower face, zombie by everglow, voidstar and longlegs by grim salvo
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He’s shaking, head in your lap. You think he might be crying, but his hands are covering his face as he curls up as tight as he can. Dabi didn’t usually spend the night, but on rare occasion you can wrangle him into sleeping a few hours before running off who knows where. Tonight had been fun, daresay cozy, watching bad movies under a blanket so you could use him as a space heater and he could use you as an icepack.
It’s near four in the morning, far past when he usually sneaks out of your tiny apartment, when you awoke to his distress. He’d been squirming on his side of your too-small bed, mumbling and whimpering unconsciously. Even now, you don’t think he’s realized the small burn on your arm from trying to wake him, but you don’t move to soothe it; you’re too busy trying to soothe him. You rub his side over his shirt and pet a hand through his spiky hair even though he’s long since stopped shaking. You pretend you don’t care you have work in a few hours.
Now, he’s completely motionless, arms fallen to the cushion of the mattress. His voice is raspier than normal when he finally speaks, “…Sorry about that.”
“’S okay. I’ve seen worse.”
You both know he’s caused your ‘worse’.
“Do you wanna tell me what’s going on up here?” You tap your fingers softly against his temple. It’s a miracle he hasn’t moved yet.
“Don’t think that’s something you’d wanna hear about.”
“You can tell me anyways,” you can practically hear him go over the notion in his head. You met almost a year and you hardly know anything about the man besides his preferred snacks and the types of movies he likes to make fun of.
He thinks for a bit before stating, “you’ve never asked about my scars.”
You hum in agreement. The healed tissue is naturally textured but worsened from insufficient aftercare. The skin grafts look like they were done by someone with medical experience, at least. “Were you dreaming about when you got them?” The scar tissue on his face always made it look like the flames had tried to take him in its hands; like it wanted to soothe him. Console him. You want to do the same.
“Kinda,” he says after another long pause, like he’s trying to find the words, “maybe more like ‘why’.”
He can’t see you frown at that. You don’t like the implication it carries.
He’s quiet for a long time while you brush through his hair. It’s gotten longer- you think you can see blonde roots peak through the inky black.
“My old man…real shit guy,” he takes in a shaky breath and subtly curls deeper into your lap, “I’m gonna kill him one day.”
(You didn’t think he was serious, then.)
“All he cares about is power. He bought my ma so he could create a child more powerful than him. I’m the oldest of four- and his biggest failure,” you wince at the way he chuckles, “It’s funny. He got what he wanted. My youngest brother is a prodigy. He’s one of the top students at U.A.,” Dabi stops again, like he has to prepare himself for what he’s about to say, “I hated that kid for so long. Tried to kill him when he was a toddler, wanted to prove I was better than him. When I was twelve or thirteen I told dear old dad I got stronger,” another pause “He didn’t care,” another pause, like he’s debating telling you the rest at all, “I burned down half a forest, woke up three years later. The fucker who fixed me up showed me pictures of my funeral and everything. Ma got institutionalized not long after…but I gave myself a new name, since I died that day.”
“What was his name?” You ask impulsively. You wish you could take those words back, stuff them in your mouth and swallow them down
“Who’s?” He looks up.
“The boy who died.”
Dabi looks away again, contemplates before relenting, “Touya. Touya Todoroki”
“Touya sounds like a sweet kid. I hope he’s resting easy.”
It’s like the words flipped a switch in him. He shoots to sit up straight. His eyes are angry. Scared.
“You don’t know shit about him.”
“That’s not the point.”
He gets up, paces the length of the bed a few times, stops, looks at the ground, “You don’t know what you’re talking about. You don’t know shit about me.”
“And whose fault is that?” You really need to learn when to shut your stupid mouth.
He looks up. Sees you fully for the first time since waking. He can see the welt he caused on your arm in his post-nightmare panic. His anger dies. His eyes widen. You reach to slap your hand over it to shield it from view, but he has his jeans on and his jacket and boots in hand before you can find words to say. He’s out the door before you can ask him not to leave.
(You call out of work that day. You won’t hear from him for three weeks.)
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Later that day, the search results for Touya Todoroki hurt as bad as you expected them to. There aren’t many paparazzi pictures of him, only a handful of him with his dad at award ceremonies.
His dad. Pro hero Endeavor.
The news coverage of his son’s death is minimal, and it’s mostly about Endeavor taking a leave of absence from hero duties to grieve with his family, but the obituary is public. The white haired boy in the picture looks so young. It’s not very detailed aside from denoting that his funeral was a private ceremony.
You open a new tab and search for fire related quirk malfunctions or natural disasters from around the same time. Its not hard to narrow down that the forest fire that destroyed Sekoto Peak was Dabi’s doing. The flames had been massive and unnaturally hot, nearly impossible to contain. There was barely anything left besides charred bone fragments from wildlife and the partial jawbone of the only human casualty they could find. The victim is unnamed, but it says the police were able to identify them through dental records and bring closure to the family.
There’s a handful of pictures of Endeavor at the scene. They make your stomach churn.
A third tab. Endeavor. There are news articles about his most recent achievements and a few about his youngest son, Shoto, who recently passed the entrance exams into U.A., just like Dabi said.
You feel nauseous.
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It’s so comfy laying here wrapped around him like a koala. He’s cold and hot at the same time. There’s one hand cradling the back of your head to his chest while the other rubs your back over the blanket he draped over you.
You don’t usually let him in when work gets you like this. He’s usually the cause, being the most prolific fire quirked villain in the country, but you felt like you needed him today. A little boy had come in with his parents after his first quirk manifestation. All you could see was a young Touya Todoroki when you looked at him. Now all you feel is the pain you feel for the real thing who has you cradled in his arms like you’re more than maybe a friend.
Dabi is prickly when it comes to touch- despite the nerve damage, his scars are sensitive- but for you, he makes exceptions, especially since this is his first time seeing you since his meltdown last month. When he woke up in his dingy-ass apartment today, he knew he had to see you, knew something was wrong. His gut was right. You practically collapsed crying in his arms when you opened the door.
You’ve barely said anything since he’s settled the two of you down on your bed. Every time he thinks about saying something, you burrow impossibly closer into his chest like if you try hard enough you can crawl in his ribs and clean out all the ash and soot that make him up.
He wants to apologize for how he left. He wants to tell you he was scared, that he’s still scared, because he’s never let anyone get close the way you have, and he doesn’t know why he yearns for you to be closer. It’s the only time he ever wishes things had gone differently. If he was closer to a normal guy, less of one of the most wanted villains in the country, maybe he’d let himself be happy to be known by you.
But the only thing Dabi can do is destroy. He burns too hot to be anyone’s light.
Dabi is ruthless. He’s a monster, a villain, a killer; there’s nothing that could clean the blood from his hands.
That doesn’t stop him from pretending things are different, even if just for a moment. You’re naturally cooler to the touch and he finds it hard to imagine ever choosing to be anywhere but in your arms. It’s such an unfamiliar feeling.
Dabi’s never had to comfort someone before. He’s never really wanted to, either.
He isn’t one to be soft or kind or comforting. It’s all so confusing. How do you drag this out of him? Why is he so content with this moment? Something about you makes him different. He doesn’t know what to do with that.
He’s scared. He’s angry. He’s unhappy.
You pull yourself away from him completely, scooting to lay on your back on the other side of your bed.
“Sorry,” you mumble, “you can go now. That was probably really uncomfortable for you. You can leave now, if you want.”
Your eyes are so empty. He’s never seen you like this. He doesn’t know what to do. He thinks he wants to stay, make his last visit up to you with more time tonight, but would you rather he go? Should he ask about what upset you? This is so new to him.
He leaves.
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The next time he’s over, you pretend to not notice the tension in the air. You move around in your usual sync, gathering snacks and scrolling through the worst rated movies you can find. You feign obliviousness to the way his eyes linger on you for longer than usual and curl up on the opposite side of the choice from him, like the months of slowly shifting closer to each other didn’t happen.
The jokes are bored and the laughs are empty.
He doesn’t spend the night. You don’t ask him to. He doesn’t know why he feels so hollowed out when he leaves.
A few weeks later, after watching movies and ignoring elephants in rooms, you fall asleep. Dabi waits, lets whatever’s playing continue to run while he watches you breathe in and out at a steady rhythm.
The credits roll. He turns off the T.V. and welcomes the darkness lit only by the city as he gets up to lay you down on your little couch. He’s never done this for you before- he doesn’t know why he’s doing it now. Your eyes flutter open as he kisses your forehead and tucks you into your blanket you keep out here.
(He did it without thinking, like it was natural, a habit. He was a big brother, once. He hadn’t realized that part of him survived.)
You look up at him as he stares down at you, eyebrows furrowed at his surprised expression. His eyes flicker to your lips without his permission. He’s already leaning over you, it’d be so easy to crawl on top of you, kiss you, wherever and however you want.
He doesn’t know what possesses him to do it. Maybe it’s Himiko’s insistence he grow up and take the risk, maybe it’s a moment of weakness where he allows himself to forget who and what he is, but he’s pressing a soft kiss to your lips without realizing. The contact makes your head jerk back, eyes wide in shock, surprise, wonder. You look at him like there’s something worthy of being looked at. His mouth moves to apologize, but you’re shooting your hands to hold his scarred cheeks and pressing you lips to his before he can try. Your skin is so cold against his had surprised at the lack of steam. He thinks you’re the prettiest thing he’s ever seen.
He doesn’t reciprocate in his shock. His response is even further delayed by the fact that he’s never done this before. He feels like a teenager- or what he imagines what being a teenager under more normal circumstances would allow him. As you move to pull away, afraid you’ve somehow overstepped, Dabi is snapped out of his shock, and he’s pulling you back in. His kiss is messy, wet, spit slick as his tongue licks into your mouth with no hesitation. The taste of his urgency is unexpected but he feels so incredible you can hardly stand it. You revel in the way his dull nails bite into your skin when you whimper at the sensation.
His hands are heavy as they make their way down your body, nearly pushing like he needs a constant reminder that this is real. Before you know it, he’s on the couch, on top of you, pushing at your shirt and you’re pulling it over your head in compliance. Dabi takes the moment to yank off his own; his torso is a marble of normal and scarred skin with a shiny barbell through each nipple. You wonder briefly if the metal is hot like the rest of his skin as his lips crash back into yours. One hand in your hair, the other on your waist- he’s pushing you down, pulling you in, until he's all but crushing you in his desperation.
You moan when he lets up, “Dabi-“
“No, no- don’t call me that. I don’t want to feel like a villain with you,” he’s equally breathless, practically heaving above you.
“…Touya?”
Your uncertainty is immediately discarded when he fully moans at the sound of his given name on your lips, “yes, yes, thank you-“ and he’s kissing you again, cradling your face like you’re porcelain but grinding down like you’re the farthest thing from fragile.
His grip tightens when the pressure of his hips makes you moan.
The weight of his body makes you dizzy. His lips and hands move down your neck, licking, biting, and sucking at all the skin newly exposed to him and it feels so good you don’t now what to do with yourself. You decide on shoving your hands in his hair; you’re pulling it at the root when he bites down next, and he’s moaning into your throat like it might kill him to be quiet.
What does he want from me? The question crashes through your brain like a bullet. You don’t know if you want to actually ask. Would it be so bad to let this happen, just to have him close like this? Is the burden of wanting from afar easier to carry than having him halfway? Yes. Of course it is.
Your sudden unresponsiveness stills him. He pulls away to find your eyes distant and face neutral.
“Touya?” You ask after a silent minute filled with his thumbs rubbing circles in your waist, “what did that mean? To you, for us?”
He gulps, “I don’t know.”
He hadn’t thought this far ahead. He hadn’t thought at all.
“You don’t know,” you echo.
He’s off you before you can decide what to make of his answer.
“Sorry, don’t know why I did that- sorry,” you think you hear as he fumbles around for his coat and his boots. You don’t say anything. You don’t even look at him. Instead, you focus on the ceiling it’s almost too dark to see. You think you hear him pause at your door, but your head is so loud and intelligible you aren’t paying attention.
The static doesn’t block out the sound of your front door shutting, though.
(Neither of you realize he left his shirt behind until after he’s already out the door. You pretend you resist the urge to cuddle it to catch his scent on it, and he will pretend he doesn’t imagine you doing just that.)
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Ever the coward, Touya runs. He throws up his shame once he’s in his own apartment. He knows he shouldn’t have left. He didn’t want to- but he didn’t know how to stay either.
He hates himself more than he has in a long time for tonight.
His burner buzzes in his pocket. It’s Shigaraki. plans in motion.
He doesn’t think you’ll forgive him for doing this, but it’s been building since before he met you. It’s not like he has any sort of life or future to look forward to anyways. It’s not like he gives you much to miss anyways.
Soon. Endeavor’s head. Soon.
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dividers by @/issysh3ll and @/thecutestgrotto
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lilyscript · 15 hours ago
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ATTENTION. - pb
warnings: smut, uhm idk what else
paige wouldn’t give you attention while she was on her ps4, so you made her pay attention.
a/n: this is my first oneshot so lmk how i did x
you sat on her bed, watching her long fingers moving across the controller, rapidly pressing buttons and dragging the joysticks. paige had been playing fortnite with her friends for what felt like years, but in reality it had only been an hour. you were growing bored… and horny. the sight of her concentrated face was so beautiful, it almost made you drool. every so often she’d lick her bottom lip, biting on it, which only made your urges worse.
“fuck, kamorea. lock in!” she shouted into the headset.
“paige, get off the game.”
“wait, babe,” she didn’t take her eyes off of the screen, “just let me finish this round.”
you asked again. “you can get back on later.”
“baby, please. it wont take that long. just wait until this game is over.” she turned her head back to you, glancing at you for a quick moment before turning back.
you didn’t respond, already growing frustrated with her. you thought for a second, wondering how you could get her attention away from the game, and focused on you. you needed her hands off that controller and on your body. waiting for the game to end was too long. you couldn’t wait.
you got up, rising from your spot to walk over to her position at the edge of the bed. she kept her eyes on the game, still rapidly clicking at the buttons on the controller. you stood in front of her before straddling her. your legs were on either side of her thighs, and your arms were resting on both of her shoulders. she still kept focus on the damn game. she looked over your shoulder to maintain a good view of the tv, which gave you the perfect opportunity to make another move. you latched your mouth onto her neck, kissing and sucking anywhere you could reach.
you pulled away to see the results of your work. there were purple marks scattered around her neck, gradually darkening. she barely had any reaction, still biting her bottom lip as she focused on her game. she snaked her arm around your waist, only a small acknowledgment of your presence. she met your gaze for a moment before tilting her head again, gesturing for you to continue. this only increased your frustration. you wanted her undivided attention. only getting a portion of her attention just wouldn’t suffice.
you scoffed before pushing off of her, walking over to her tv stand. you reached for the console, turning it off with the simple press of a button.
“babe!” paige called out, finally turning her gaze towards you.
“you weren’t giving me any attention.” you walked back to your position, straddling paige again.
this time when you straddled her, she didn’t look off to the side. she looked at you with furrowed brows before harshly gripping your hips and pushing you down onto the bed. now you were laid on the bed with her hovering over you… exactly what you wanted.
she lowered her face beside your ear, whispering “you have it now. my full, undivided, attention.”
you smiled, almost moaning at the mere sound of her low husky voice. she grabbed your face, making sure you looked into her eyes as she said her next words.
“and because you didn’t listen when i told you to wait, you’re not gonna get it how you want it. this shit’s gonna go my way.”
as soon as she was done speaking, she latched her mouth onto yours. her free hand held your neck, giving it a gentle squeeze. her tongue made its way around your mouth, exploring it as if she had never kissed you before. you moaned into her mouth as you bucked your hips up, eager for more. your pussy started to pulse and you squeezed your legs together, desperate for any form of pleasure. paige moved her hand from your neck to under your shirt, her cold hand making it’s way to your chest.
she pulled away from your mouth, “no bra?”
she smiled before lifting your shirt up, instantly latching her mouth onto your bud. with her free hand, she massaged your other breast. another moan slipped from your mouth, a curse following right after. she continued to work on your breasts, switching her mouth to the other. you continued to moan, your breaths shallow and quick.
she detached her mouth from your breast before returning to your mouth with a lustful kiss. she snaked her hand down, slipping it below your shorts as she continued to kiss you. you bucked your hips up to meet her hand, forcing more contact. she quickly disconnected her mouth from yours and pushed your hips back down.
“mm-mm, baby. this is gonna go my way or i’m not gonna fuck you at all, remember?” she husked.
you nodded your head, but that wasn’t enough for paige.
“use your words, baby.”
you spoke softly, “yes, paige. it’s gonna go your way.”
she resumed her movements, placing her hand over your slit. she slipped her fingers over your clit, rubbing soft circles on it. soft moans escaped your lips as you finally felt the pleasure you were waiting for.
“that good baby? do i make you feel good?”
you nodded your head, “yes, paige, so good.”
she started to rub tighter, faster, and harder. she applied more pressure, eliciting more frequent moans from you. your breath was shaky and sharp, the knot in your stomach rapidly tightening. her sucking on your neck as she rubbed your bud only added to the intense pleasure you were feeling.
you moaned her name, “paige…”
“hm?” she continued to suck on your neck.
“i need more.”
she stopped her movements, placing her hand on your neck once again. “you’re such a needy brat, i’ve already told you to wait. you couldn’t do it the first time, but you’re going to now.”
your moans stopped at the loss of contact. your eyes fluttered open, and you were forced to meet her gaze when she turned your face towards hers.
she lowered herself to settle in between your legs. she slowly peeled your shorts off of you, and you grew more and more needy by the second. you almost wanted to just use your own hands, but you knew she’d make you feel even better.
she peeled your panties off after your shorts, glancing up at you through her eyelashes before sinking her face between your legs.
she grunted at the sight of your pussy, “so beautiful. all wet for me… so beautiful.”
you could only manage to moan when she attached her tongue to your sopping cunt. she started to lick and suck on your bud. you were a moaning mess, the only other sounds coming from the sound of paige eating you out. she flicked her tongue up and down your clit, your eyes rolling back in your head as you buried your head deeper into her pillow.
she added a finger into your cunt, not even pausing her mouth movements. she pressed her tongue flat against your bud before sucking on it. the only sounds that you could make were moans and curses. you couldn’t even say her full name.
“pai- oh, fuck.”
“oh my fuck, pa… fuck, p.”
“shit, so… mmm…”
you were nearing your orgasm as she continued to lap at your cunt. you opened your eyes and looked down at paige. stray hairs started to fall from her slick back bun, and you tucked it behind her ears. the clear view of her licking your cunt and pumping her finger inside of you was enough to break the knot in your stomach. your moans got louder and more frequent as you started to approach your high, but before you could feel the release… paige paused.
“brats don’t get to come when they want.”
you’re panting heavily, trying to catch your breath. “paige, please…”
she smirked, “tell me what you want, and how you want it.”
“fuck me, paige. please, i need you to make me come.” your voice is laced with desperation.
“i’ll think about it.” she responded before sinking back into her position between your legs.
you sighed in relief as soon as her tongue was back on your clit. she slid a finger into your cunt once again, eliciting a loud moan from you. she pumped her finger in and out of your wet core before adding another. you moaned even louder, the knot in your stomach rebuilding, but this time it was stronger.
“fuck, paige. just like that.”
moaning her name only motivated her more, and she completely forgot why she was mad. she sped up her pace, your moans even more lewd than before. she sucked and licked, and the knot in your stomach felt as if it was going to burst. with one last pump of her fingers, you arched your back off the bed, calling her name out as you moaned. she allowed you to ride out your high, still licking your clit.
she pulled herself up, smirking at you as she watched you pant and try to relax. she stuck her two fingers into her mouth, sucking them. she groaned at the taste of you, maintaining eye contact with you as she did. you pulled her face to yours, connecting your lips. you moaned into the kiss as you tasted yourself on her tongue.
paige pulled back, “i love you, baby.”
“i love you too, paige.”
———
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yagirlwrites · 2 days ago
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Angels & Demons | (Sub!Rafe)
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Pairing: sub!Rafe Cameron x domme!Reader
Synopsis: Rafe asks reader to a Halloween bash, proposing they wear matching costumes. They have a conversation on where they stand. Lots of fun at the biggest party of the year.
Warnings: fluff, clingy!rafe, pouty!rafe, alcohol consumption
Word Count: 8.4k (I'm so so sorry I need psychiatric help)
A/N: Hi y'all! It's finally here, ignore the fact that its 10 days late - Happy Halloween🤣 This is really long and fluffy, some steamy scenes as well because it wouldn't be me without them 😘 The smut for the day after the party will be posted soon! Had to separate it because it would have been too damn long to read and y'all deserved to have this as soon as possible. Hope it's not too long anyway 😭 I am sorry for the delay but I hope you enjoy it! As always lmk what you think!
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My work is my own; it's not to be copied, transferred or translated. Reblogs, comments, feedback are always welcome and appreciated❤️
Happy reading 🥰
Angels & Demons
"I need you to sit still, baby." His heart soared, as it always did, when she called him that. He was currently sitting at her vanity while she patiently applied glitter to his face.
He felt restless, she was so close and she smelled so nice and she was touching him so gently. Looking at her, so beautiful, right in front of him was driving him insane. It was his own fault for being in this situation, getting ready for a party he suggested they attend. So he really had no right to be acting bratty. He just really wanted to kiss her and she was keeping him hostage in the small chair. The generous view of her cleavage bent over like this, courtesy of her costume, might also have something to do with his fading sanity.
It was a week ago when he suggested they go to the Halloween bash together. It was the biggest party of the year so far, spanning the entire greek street. It was always wild and intense, but he wasn't interested in that this year. He just wanted to spend time with her and his friends, and have a good time. This would technically be their coming out party and he was ecstatic when she said yes to coming. Even more so when he suggested they match their costumes, trying to play it off as no big deal, but in actuality extremely aware of the implications.
"Like, a couple's costume?" It came out of the blue. They had been cuddled up on her couch when he brought up the topic the party and asked if she wanted to come with him. Then he started acting all shy and flustered broaching the topic of outfits.
"Yeah. I don't know if you maybe wanted to match. Might be cool, I don't know." He was blushing in that way that made her heart melt like a popsicle on a hot summer day. He didn't even give her a chance to respond as he continued.
"Unless you don't want to or think it would be weird, it's totally fine we don't have to. It was just a thought..." he trailed off, not meeting her eyes, flustered and insecure. Her heart ached.
"Hey..." her soft palm met his cheek and forced him to look back at her.
"Why would it be weird?" Her gaze was warm and he was blushing even harder now. His thoughts felt scrambled, all the practicing he had done in his head vanishing into thin air when he was so close to her.
"I don't know. Maybe you don't see us..." he trailed off, shrugging his shoulders, not able to finish his thought.
"As a couple?" She offered, trying to help but driving him further up the wall instead. He just shrugged, keeping his eyes trained on the coffee table, feeling weak. She pushed him further onto the couch, straddling his lap in order to force him to look at her. His heart felt like it might burst out of his chest.
She said nothing, simply waited for him to speak up. Needing him to talk to her, instead of shutting down. They'd talked about this habit of his, she promised she'd never judge him and he promised he'd try his best to be as open with her as he could. So he had no choice then, not when she was looking at him like that. Not after he made her a promise.
"We never talked about it. So you might not." His eyes were running wildly all over her face, trying to be respectful and not look away but not brave enough to see the possible rejection in her gaze.
"Do you want us to?" He sighed, the feeling of her playing with his hair making him lose the last bit of dignity he had. He was so desperate for her he couldn't cope.
"Maybe..." she shook her head then. She hated that word, wished he would stop using it and just say what he really wants. But she knew it was hard for him so she didn't push it.
"Do you want us to be a couple, Rafe?" His eyes finally met hers, hearing the vulnerability in her voice. When they did, he saw no judgement, no rejection, just kindness. And he didn't have it in him to pretend anymore.
"I do." The beat it took for her to react felt like an eternity, his breath stuck in his throat.
"Good." She smiled, caressing his face so gently he thought he'd cry. She kissed his red cheek and whispered a soft "me too."
His heart skipped at her words, a bright smile finally making it's way onto his face as he hugged her so close, leading them both to almost fall off the couch. The only thing that could be heard in her small appartment was the sound of their giggles as they processed their emotional conversation.
"Fuck, I'm so relieved." He kissed her neck where his head was burried while he held her as close as possible. Her hands running though his hair in that soothing manner she knew he loved. She laughed as he peppered kisses on her skin.
"What? Did you really think I'd say no?" She pulled him back enough to look at his beautiful face. He had a sheepish smile on and his eyes sparkled with joy.
"I don't know." He shrugged in a careless manner, even though they both knew it was a front.
"Oh so you think I just let any guy sleep over and cuddle with me on the couch?" She was giving him a faux offended look and he couldn't help but laugh.
"I don't know, you might..." he grinned and she rolled her eyes.
"Bro, be serious." She pushed off of him to pick up the blanket that had fallen to the floor during their tumble.
"Bro? You can't friendzone me now!" He whined as she stood up, folding the blanket and then throwing it right in his cheeky little face. He let out a surprised yelp and she giggled as he rushed after her on her way to the kitchen. He looked like a lost puppy, incapable of not being near her, it seemed.
"So what's this costume?" He was looking at her throat as she gulped down a glass of water, completely zoned out when she asked the question.
"Huh?" He snapped his eyes back to her face but it was too late, she'd already noticed him ogling her. His ears turned a shade pinker as he tried to play it off.
"The costume you want to wear, what is it?" He looked confused.
"I don't know." He shrugged causing her to raise her eyebrow.
"You don't have a costume in mind?" He shook his head, grinning as he stepped closer to her.
"Whatever you want." She had to refrain from laughing at how cute he was, with his floppy hair and his rumpled clothes and his childlike grin.
"So now I have to come up with a couple's costume even thought it was your idea?" She played annoyed but he could see the smirk twitching at the corner of her mouth. He wrapped his arms around her and connected their foreheads, the intimate banter reducing them both to mush on the inside.
"Yep. Just want everyone to know." He nuzzled his nose into her hair as her fingers ran gently over his back.
"Know what?" He pulled back to look at her then. A rare moment of bravery.
"That I'm yours." Her breath caught in her throat at the way he said it. So sure, so honest, so utterly unashamed. It made butterflies appear in her stomach and she wanted to curse at how much she loved hearing those words come out of his mouth.
"That you're mine?" She kissed his face gently and his smile could not be bigger.
"Mhm. All yours." she blushed from the raw honesty in his words and he noticed. But before he could call her out on it she kissed him, making him forget whatever thought he might have had of teasing her.
It was heaven, whenever their lips met. They felt like they became one and it was so insane to think about that they refused to, simply letting themselves get lost in the pleasure of being with each other.
And now here they were, in her bedroom, putting the finishing touches on the costumes. He admired how stunning she looked, so focused and unguarded. He swore he had never seen a person more beautiful in his life. He couldn't stop a smirk from making its way onto his face as he took in her outfit. The tight leather bustier made her boobs look insane, the short black skirt leaving just enough to the imagination, and the skull shaped lace of her thights hugged her thighs so well he wanted to bite into them.
"One last thing" she positioned the accessory on his head and smiled at the result.
"Perfect." He blushed at the compliment, turning around to face the mirror and finally see her hadiwork.
He looked flushed and soft, the sparkles on his face matching the ones on the halo atop of his head. He was dressed in all white, a button down over a white t-shirt, white pants she made him buy the other day, and white converse on his feet. The silver against the white made him look almost ethereal. He was a literal angel before her eyes and she could not be happier with how it all turned out.
She grabbed her own headpiece, a pair of black horns and completed their couples costume. An angel and a demon. Not the most unique of ideas, however the roles were usually reversed. He told her that when she came up with the concept and all she said was "You're my good boy now, right? You're gonna be my angel." After that he shut up and the flush didn't leave his cheeks for a long time.
He didn't know if she fully understood just how much she affected him when she said stuff like that. Messed with his mind, his heart, twisting him up inside until he feels like falling at her feet. Or maybe she knew exactly how bad he had it for her, and she enjoyed it.
She was taking her sweet time taking him in, critical eye paying attention to every detail waiting to find something she might have missed. Even though it wasn't her idea and she'd never done matching costumes with anyone before, she was feeling super excited at the prospect of the entire campus knowing he was hers. She wasn't a jealous person, but she knew there were girls vying for his attention and now he was making it clear he had no interest in anyone but her. It made her heart feel so full that she had to force herself to stay cool. He did that. He'd come and sweep the rug out from under her in the best ways. One minute she's chill and the next he hits her with this genuine unabashed affection and she's left confused as to how to cope. She wouldn't complain though, it was the best kind of surprise every time it happened.
To think not long ago she had thought he could never be with someone like her, that they weren't compatible. It was laughable now. Every move they made felt perfectly synced, like it was always meant to be the two of them together. And whenever her insecurities would try and weasel into her mind he'd smile at her in that way he did and she'd feel peace again. She knew he still had his demons but since they agreed to be open with each other he seemed more calm, less on edge, like that peace she felt was mirrored in him too. She couldn't quite believe how happy she was.
He was looking at her with those bedroom eyes again and she had to refrain from letting her mind run wild, as his no doubt was. They spent hours getting ready and they had a party to go to.
This would be the first time they arrived together at a party, and while she wasn't particularly bothered about what other people thought, she knew he cared and wanted to show the world they were together now. For real. She understood, they had spent so much time making up for all the months wasted, in their little bubble and while it was amazing and they wouldn't trade it for anything - they did need to step back into the real world. Meet each other's people, be part of each others lives in public too.
He was really excited at the prospect and it warmed her heart to see him so positively nervous about something. Something other than sex, that is. She needed to stop thinking about sex and focus. Party. They're going to a party. She grabbed her purse and took his hand leading them out the door and into the night.
................
Walking into his frat, hand in hand, it felt like the entire house was staring at them. In reality most people didn't pay them a second glance, but it felt like a momentous occasion to him. He had a big, proud smile on his face as he led her through the massive crowd to the kitchen where he knew his friends would most likely be congregated. As they walked in they were met with loud whoops sounding over the music.
"Mistery Girl! You made it!" It was Mac, Rafe's best friend. They'd met several times, and even though he now knew her name, he still clung to the nickname - to Rafe's great annoyance. As expected, Rafe rolled his eyes at his friend. She smiled and greeted his group, some of whom she'd briefly met before, some faces definitely unfamiliar leading Rafe to introduce her.
Rafe went to make her a drink, knowing she prefers a cocktail to a beer. He managed to locate some fruity syrup and decided to mix her a drink himself. He didn't trust any of the already made punches floating around. She deserved the best. Since best wasn't an option, at least better than the terribly tasting jungle juice Mac always made.
Aaron, one of his frat brothers, whom he didn't really care for, decided to stand too close to her for his liking. Rafe was looking at him while making sure not to spill any of the alcohol he was pouring. He didn't like him crowding her and he wanted to get back there to prevent any unfortunate scene that might unfold.
"So you're the devil, huh?" She gave the random man next to her an unimpressed look, taking a step to the side to create space between them. She didn't want to deal with annoying creeps, but she needed to keep her promise and not do anything to offend his friends.
"Just a lowly demon, I'm afraid." She replied to his question, trying to stay polite.
"Ah, I don't see nothing lowly about you, sweetheart." His gaze flashed to her cleavage and her blood started boiling when he leaned into her space again. He was clearly already drunk but her patience was wearing thin.
"Here you go, babe." His voice snapped her out of her reverie, bringing with him a calm she had missed in the past few minutes they were apart. She took the cup from him, relaxing into his chest as he made himself at home at her back, wrapping one arm around her. His eyes were shooting daggers at Aaron, and she had to refrain from smirking, finding his protectiveness endearing.
"This is pretty good, sweet boy." She looked up at him after tasting his conconction and he broke eye contact with Aaron to look back at her, a smile shining on his face at the compliment. A slight blush appeared on his cheeks at the pet name. He had yet to get used to how he felt every time she called him something so sweet and loving. This was the first time she had called him a nickname in public, not thinking anything of it until the pest next to them decided to speak up.
"N'aww ain't that just adorable?" The smile wiped off Rafe's face in record time as he shot daggers at Aaron for the interruption. Jade was getting more and more annoyed by this random guy and she knew Rafe was as well, so she wished to remove them both from his presence. Before she could though, he had to speak again.
"When did you become such a pussy, Cameron?" Rafe rolled his eyes, tired of his bullshit and ready to leave the kitchen but he felt her stiffen in his arms.
"You watch your mouth." Her voice was low and cold, but everyone in the kitchen could hear it nontheless.
"It's okay-" before he got a chance to reassure her that this dickhead's words meant nothing to him, he was interrupted.
"Woah there little lady. You're feisty. She speaks for you now, too? What happened to you, bro?" He was giggling to himself, but none of his other friends seemed amused. She was starting to realize no one liked him, but for the life of her couldn't understand why they tolerated such a piece of shit.
"Listen here, you little cockroach-" she took a step towards him but Rafe snapped into action, wrapping his arm tighter against her and pulling her backwards.
"Rafe..." her tone held a warning, but he didn't care. He wasn't about to let Aaron of all people, ruin their night before it even started.
"Baby, he's not worth it. Everyone knows he's just desperate for attention, since no one's giving him any." His first words whispered to her, but the latter said loud enough for everyone to hear. Aaron flushed red in anger and Mac saw it as his queue to jump in.
"Alright, we get it. You're jealous Rafe has a girl now. My condolences man but we gotta move on, yeah?" The crowd laughed at Mac's jokes making Aaron even more furious, but the friendly arm Mac slung around his shoulder and the beer he handed him managed to distract the drunken douche enough for Rafe to drag her out of the kitchen.
"You should've let me knock him out." Her teeth were clenched and he tried to prevent a smile from breaking out but she looked so adorable, all mad and protective, ready to fight for his honor. He chuckled at the thought and her eyes snapped to him, taking in his face, thinking he's laughing at her.
"Hey. I could take him!" She was offended.
"Oh trust me, I know. I remember just how lethal that right hook can be." His eyes were sparkling with mischief, and she realized he was only teasing her.
"He deserved it." She spoke, no longer upset, feeling her anger leave her body as he swayed them both on the dance floor.
"I know." He was smirking, giving her that annoying yet adorable look, driving her crazy.
"Why do you let him talk to you like that?" He sighed, pulling her into his chest, laying his head on top of hers as they danced.
"I don't care enough about his opinion to let him ruin my night." She looked up at him then, realizing he wasn't being a pushover because of his friends, which she worried might have been the reason why he didn't fight back. He was just mature enough not to let some irrelevant twat get under his skin. She smiled at that, wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him closer.
"That's very grown up of you." She teased and he laughed, glad she was back to normal.
"And you ready to fight him for a stupid comment, is definitely not." She rolled her eyes, a slight blush tinging her cheeks.
He was right, she had promised herself to stay cool but one mean comment aimed at him destroyed her composure. She felt such an intense need to protect him, it was quite confusing and scary. She would have laid that fucker out right there in the kitchen. How embarrassing.
"Hey, I'm not complaining. It was very hot, how protective you got." He was smirking again, the cocky little shit. She rolled her eyes again and pulled him into a kiss, just to shut him up and distract him from her somewhat childish behavior. He moaned into the kiss when her tongue entered his mouth and she smiled when she felt him shiver under her fingertips. He was so easy.
When she broke the kiss he was dazed, chasing her lips to prolong the moment but she simply gave him a sweet peck and pulled away. The pout on his face was adorable, resembling a little kid told he can't have his favorite candy for dinner. She admired the flush of redness on his skin from the brief shared moment and a longing stirred in her belly, resembling the one very clearly written on his face. They both wanted more but this was not the time or the place, so she went back to slowly swaying with him in a soft embrace. He melted into her, as he always did.
The kiss made him crave more but she was making it clear it wasn't going to happen. Not yet, at least. He enjoyed the way she held him though, so warm and soft and protected. It always messed with his emotions but he wasn't ashamed of how much he enjoyed it. Not even a little.
It wasn't long before their peaceful moment got interrupted. Mac nearly knocked them both down in excitement as he announced body shots taking place on the formerly used beer pong table. This was exactly the kind of chaos she'd come to expect from a frat party. Rafe's eyes glistened with mischief and she knew what he was going to say before he even spoke.
"What do you say? Wanna do body shots?" He had a playful smirk on his face, fully expecting her to roll her eyes and reject him.
"Sure." She nearly laughed at how quickly the smirk disappeared, replaced with a confusion which then gave way to cautious excitement. She smiled and took his hand, following where Mac had gone, presumably in the direction of the shots.
Rafe was buzzing with excitement as they made their way to the basement where the den was. That's where they usually used the old ping pong table for beer pong. A crowd was gathered around the table, whooping as a guy finished licking salt off a girl's neck. He couldn't believe she agreed to this. Holy shit.
They made their way to the table, waiting for another couple to finish, being next in line. Rafe could feel the adrenaline coursing through his body in anticipation. Then she turned to him and smirked and he thought he'd pass out right then and there. She was the sexiest woman alive, he'd swear it. He couldn't believe he got to call her his girlfriend.
"Shirt off." The command in her voice shook him to his core, too reminiscent of how she talked to him in the privacy of her bedroom. His pulse quickened in excitement. And then he processed her words and realized what she was saying.
"Lay down." Her eyes held a spark in them that always knocked his breath out of his lungs. Of course. Of course she would do this. He didn't know why he was expecting anything else. He followed her orders, like he always did. He had never been the one on the receiving end of body shots and he'd be lying if he said it wasn't turning him on.
The crowd went wild as he undressed and positioned himself on the table. She drank him in, all flushed, a sheen of sweat marking his body from the dancing. He looked delicious and she could feel arousal pool in her belly. It was messy, being like this in front of all these people. She knew, but in that moment she didn't have it in her to care. He was laying there, waiting for her and she wasn't going to deny either of them the high about to happen.
She moved into action, pouring salt on his collar bone and continuing a line down his chest, making Mac whoop out a "hell yeah!". She was solely focused on Rafe, though. He was getting more and more red as the seconds passed and he could feel the lust running through him. She was driving him insane. She put a lime wedge in his mouth and gave him a cheeky wink to which he silently groaned. A fucking tease.
With one last look into his wild eyes, she downed a shot of tequila and finally bent down to make contact with his skin. She licked a long strip from his belly button, over his chest, to his collar bones where she cleaned all the salt off his sticky skin. He shivered as her mouth moved to his neck, giving a cheeky bite to his sweet spot. His eyes rolled to the back of his head in response. She was evil for that.
Finally her eyes met his again as she leaned in to take the lime wedge from him, biting into it, letting the sour juice soak her tongue and complete her shot. The crowd cheered loudly and she quickly discarded the lime wedge to the side as she pulled him in and kissed him, deep and hot and messy.
Both of them were completely lost in the moment, the tension coming to a head as their tongues met and he tasted the liquior and lime on her. He moaned into the kiss, not caring about if anyone heard, solely focused on her. The kiss didn't last long but it awakened something in both of them. She managed to force herself back, to not give these strangers any more of a show than she already had, and pulled him up by his hand.
He struggled to find his feet, feeling completely fucking dazed from that kiss and that body shot and her touch and fuck she was ruining him.
As soon as they moved away from the table, the crowd's attention was taken by the next couple and they had a chance to take a breath. He was red all over, his shirt crumpled in his hand, his other hand in hers. She looked flushed as well, probably for the same reason he was. That was insane.
She kissed him again, finally out of the spotlight. This kiss was slower, but still as deep. He could feel his pants constricting him as he realized he was fully hard for her. She didn't miss it either, as she felt his length pressing against her abdomen. He groaned at the pressure and she pulled back to look at him.
He was embarassed so he lead her away from the basement, making sure to stay hidden behind her, not wanting anyone to witness his predicament. When they made it back to the ground floor he wasted no time in grabbing her hand and rushing up the stairs, her bemused laughter accompanying the movement.
"Where are you going?" She asked, trying to keep up with the speed at which he was practically running.
"My room." He spoke as if it was obvious as he pulled her in the direction of the room they'd both spent several nights tangled up together.
"Rafe, we're not having sex right now." She didn't want to be that couple, the one hooking up in the middle of a party after doing body shots. It felt like a cliche.
"No, I just need..." he trailed off as he unlocked his room, pulling her in as he turned the light on.
"Just need a moment." He looked down at his crotch with a blush and she smiled in understanding. He needs some privacy to calm down.
"Okay, baby." She kissed his cheek in reassurance and made her way to his desk chair, making herself comfortable.
He awkwardly stood there, not sure what to do now. Just having her in his room again was not helping with his problem. The thought of having to go take care of himself in the bathroom depressed him though. So he begrudgingly sat down on his bed and looked at her, confused.
She wanted to laugh at his expression, like he had no clue what to do with himself. His very obvious erection was not helping her calm down from what happened earlier. In fact, the fire in her was getting worse as she looked at him so vulnerable in front of her. Still shirtless, his chest moving with heavy breaths. It was driving her insane.
"Can I..." he didn't finish his thought, almost cursing at even saying anything. His voice had been so quiet she almost didn't hear him.
"What?" She drew the chair closer, to hear him better, making him take in a deep breath to try and get a hold of himself.
"Nothing. Forget it." He shook his head and refused to meer her eyes. That was unacceptable.
"Rafe." Her voice left no room for argument, she wanted him to tell her the truth.
"I was just... I wanted to..." he trailed off again feeling agitated that he couldn't just be confident in expressing himself the way he wished he could. He knew it frustrated her too and it made him feel worse.
"Wanted what, baby?" She moved to sit down next to him, her proximity only causing more frustration to bubble inside him.
"I want to taste you." He finally managed to verbalize his thoughts, meeting her eyes with apprehension.
"Oh..." she wasn't expecting that.
"I'm sorry." She shook her head at his apology.
"No, don't be. It's okay." She held his face in her hands then, observing him.
"Why are you so afraid, hm?" He gulped at her question, uncomfortable at her ability to see right through him all the time.
"I don't know, I just.. I don't wanna dissappoint you." She sighed and pulled him closer, placing a soft kiss on his lips. He exhaled in relief, she wasn't judging him.
"You would never dissappoint me by telling me what you want or how you feel, Rafe. I told you this." Her eyes were so kind it threw him.
"I know, I know. I just... I don't wanna screw this up." He looked embarrassed again and she hated it.
"You could never screw anything up by being honest. The opposite, actually." He nodded, feeling calmer as her fingers played with his hair.
"I'm sorry I'm so messed up." He let out a slight chuckle and she responded with a kind smile.
"You don't ever have to apologize for being human. Not to me. Not to anyone." She was looking at him with such conviction he couldn't help but nod. He wanted to believe her so badly.
"Is this something you've been wanting for a while?" He flushed again, remembeing his words form earlier, shyly nodding.
"Why didn't you say anything? Hm?" She placed her forehead against his, offering comfort and a grounding touch which was exactly what he needed.
"Dunno. Didn't want to overstep." He was finally being honest with her.
"By expressing your desires? To your girlfriend?" She was looking at him with slight amusement, and he blushed even more. She was right, it was silly
"When you say it like that it sounds dumb." He chuckled and she smiled at the sound. She kissed him again, a sweet kiss that helped ease his embarassment.
"I know I'm supposed to talk to you. I just didn't know how to bring this up without... I don't know... offending you." She nearly laughed at that.
"Offending me?" He shrugged.
"I don't know if it's allowed to ask for that." He blushed again, the teasing note in his voice not missed by her.
"You can ask for whatever you want, baby. I might not agree with everything, but you can always ask." She was serious now, wanting him to understand she meant it.
"Alright... So can I? Taste you?" He was holding his breath now, anticipating her answer. Truth be told he had been craving it for months - to please her like that. He enjoyed giving head before but he felt like he would explode with need over doing it for her.
"Not right now." She smiled.
"But I can... some other time?" He was desperate for her to say yes, to know he has a chance to fulfill this need, to please her like she deserves.
"Maybe." She was driving him crazy now.
"Maybe?" His tone was exasperated causing her to smile.
"Yes. Maybe." She pulled back so she could maintain eye contact.
"Eating my pussy is a privilege to be earned, Rafe. Not just something you can expect." He gulped as she spoke, driving him more and more insane with each word passing her lips. He wanted to scream with how hot she was, how sexy he found her confidence and how much he hated and loved her dominant personality all at once. He felt ready to beg. It was pathetic, really.
"How do I earn it?" His question made her stifle a chuckle, the eagerness in his tone endearing.
"By being a really, really good boy." She whispered the last part, his eyes glazing over, caught in a trance. She was so evil for playing with him when he's so messed up over her already.
"I'll do anything. I'll be so good." He would have been embarassed at how pathetic he sounded but he didn't have it in him to care, his arousal overwhelming him.
"You will, huh?" He nodded so fast she had to hold back from laughing. She couldn't believe he was begging to eat her out right now. This was not what she expected out of tonight.
"Yes. I'll be soo good for you. Please..." He was so far gone now, the whine in his voice causing her panties to dampen. Damn him. Damn him for how hot he looked, begging for her.
"You're gonna be good for me?" He was nodding along, clearly too far gone at this point to form words.
"Okay. I need you to calm down so we can go back downstairs." His brows furrowed as her words registered.
"What?" He asked, trying to clear the lustful haze from his brain.
"We came to a party, remember?" He was nodding along.
"So we're going back downstairs and you're going to enjoy yourself at the party you wanted us to come to. Yeah?" He finally started realizing she wasn't going to give him what he so desperately wants. She was mean for teasing him like that. He pouted again, giving her that kicked puppy look, but she stood her ground. He sighed loudly, feeling grumpy now.
"You're cruel." He mumbled as he got up and made his way to the door.
"What was that?" She heard him the first time but wanted to see if he'd have the balls to repeat it.
"Nothing. I'm going to the bathroom." He shuffled out of the room with his head down.
She felt a little guilty for rejecting him like that but she meant what she said. She didn't get all dressed up and come to this party just to end their night so soon. She knew this had been important to him and she didn't want his lust to distract him from what he really wanted to do tonight. Which is spend time with his friends and her, not to go back to their bubble the second they got horny. No. Tonight was a test for both of them, to practice some freaking self control. She had to be the strong one, cause he clearly couldn't be. Not when it came to this. But he made it really, really difficult to keep her head straight. Trouble personified.
Once he returned from the bathroom he seemed more calm, more in control of himself. He had splashed his face with water and spent an annoying amount of time sitting on the closed toilet seat, forcing himself to stop thinking dirty things and relax. It wasn't easy, with everything that happened in the basement and then his room. The teasing, the tension, it was all too much. But he understood why she rejected his advances, no matter how embarrassed he might be about it. He was the one who dragged them out to this party, making a big deal out of the night - so he had no right to be mad at her for trying to do what he had asked - experience the party with him.
So he shook his naughty thoughts off and managed to calm himself down enough to where his arousal was no longer noticable. It was the best he could do without jerking off and he really didn't want to do that.
She got up as he enterd the room, approaching him and pulling him into a hug immediately. He realized she felt bad for what happened but he wasn't upset anymore.
"It's okay. You're right. We should go back downstairs." She pulled back to look at him, to see if he was being honest with her. He smiled at her worry.
"I promise." He gave her a cheeky smirk and she accepted his answer, pressing a quick peck to his cheek and pulling him out of the room, back to the party.
He felt so lucky, holding her hand, seeing her interact with his friends, the smile on her face encouraging him to snap out of his thoughts and back to reality. He decided downing a few more shots would help him relax further, making it easier to forget how worked up he had been not 10 minutes ago.
As the night went on they hung out with his friends, drank, laughed and danced together. It was perfect. Exactly what he wished it would be like. He wanted her to like his friends and be comfortable around them and she seemed to be doing great.
They were in the kitchen again, her sitting on one of the bar chairs, chatting with one of the girls in the group. Completely smitten and unable to tear his eyes away, he just looked at her, his girlfriend - the realization making his heart feel so damn full he couldn't believe it. She was his girlfriend. How on earth did he get so fucking lucky?
She could feel his eyes boring into her for a while now, so she looked back at him finding him with a lovesick smile on his face, drunk and adorable, unashamed in his staring.
She decided to keep her drinking to a minimum, being the responsible one as always. It was in her nature. He was clearly already quite drunk but she didn't mind. She hadn't seen him drink that much during the time they've been together so she didn't feel a need to worry about it being a regular occurence. He just seemed really happy tonight and she didn't mind taking care of him once the time came. Which is something she never expected from herself at all- wanting to take care of a guy, not in terms of aftercare post sex, but in general. It made her question her sanity.
Once he realized she was looking at him the smile on his face only got bigger and he felt the intense urge to go to her, so he did. She smiled as he slightly stumbled into her, wrapping her arms protectively around him to steady him.
"Having fun?" She cheekily asked and he gave her the biggest boyish smile in return.
"Mhm, so much fun." He cuddled into her, taking her slightly by surprise. He was acting like they were the only people in the room, even though the kitchen was full of his friends. She could feel eyes on them as she played with his hair, the touch grounding, coaxing him back into reality.
"You okay, baby?" He simply nodded and nuzzled his face into her neck.
"Just happy." Her heart skipped a beat. She felt such intense affection for him in that moment it was unreal.
He wrapped his arms around her, making himself at home in between her legs, cocooning himself in her embrace. He was behaving the same way he did when they were alone, always desperate for her touch, to feel connected to her. It seemed even more intense now when they had a crowd of people looking at them.
"Feeling clingy?" She jokingly asked as the eyes of those around them burned into her skin. She didn't mind it but she was worried he might be embarrassed when he realized how he was acting in front of everyone.
"Just want you to hold me." He kissed her cheek and she could feel a slight blush forming where his lips met her skin.
She held him close, letting him soak in her touch, just as she did when they were in her apartment. She played with his hair and gave his back scratches in the same well practiced dance her fingers performed every day. She decided to break the moment by starting up a conversation with the same girl again as he cuddled into her in silence.
They stayed like that for a while and slowly but surely everyone got used to the odd sight of Rafe Cameron being clingy and soft as fuck, realizing this was normal behavior to the pair as she took it in stride.
After a while Rafe started getting antsy, she could feel him wiggling around and cocked a brow.
"What's up, angel?" Their eyes met and he pouted.
"Need to pee." He almost whined out causing her to chuckle.
"Then go pee?" She didn't understand his dilemma.
"Don't wanna." She realized what he meant, he didn't want to let go of her and leave her embrace even for a short bathroom trip. It made her almost laugh but she held back from it, seeing the serious expression on his face. He was drunker than she thought. She sighed, not believing what she was about to say.
"You want me to come with you?" She could see by the way he immediately brightened, she was right.
She couldn't believe she was so down bad that she'd baby a guy like this. But alas there she was, holding his hand and guiding him to the bathroom. She needed to maintain some dignity so she told him she'd wait outside for him to which he pouted but decided not to complain after seeing the resolution on her face. So she watched him stumble into the bathroom making a mental note to get him to drink water once they got back.
When he came out of the bathroom, he almost lost his footing nearly tripping until she caught him, steadying him. He was embarrassed at how drunk he'd gotten.
"We need to get you some water, baby." He noded his head, wrapping his arms around her again, quietly apologizing into her skin over and over and over while she shushed him and guided them back to the kitchen. As soon as they got there she was thrusting a water bottle at him.
"Drink the whole thing." Her tone left no room for argument so he drank the water obediently and she kept a watchful eye on him the whole time. As she did, she finally noticed something different in his costume. He had gotten redressed when he was in the bathroom upstairs, but something was missing.
"Where's your halo?" He stared at her confused, processing her words for a long moment until they finally set in. He hurried to check his head for the headband he was wearing at the beginning of the night only to find it gone. He set the now empty water bottle on the counter, turning around in search of the missing piece but it was nowhere to be seen.
"I lost it." He pouted, trying to think back to where he had it last but the task was impossible for his drunken mind. She softened at his sad expression, he looked like he might cry.
"It's okay, baby. It was only like 3 dollars." He shook his head, not feeling any better about it.
"But you got it for me." He looked so cute and pitiful, pouting like a kid over a piece of plastic.
"I can get you another one." She smiled as he brightened.
"Really?" She nodded, pulling him closer to fix the mess his hair.
"Really. It's not a big deal." But it was to him. It might have been a silly constume prop but he fully intended to keep it forever as a reminder of their night.
"Our costumes are ruined." He whined and she held back a laugh at his theatrics.
"I don't think anyone cares about our costumes anymore, Rafe." She was right, everyone was too drunk to care about any of that at this point.
"I do.... Now we don't look like a couple anymore." She sighed in exasperation.
"But we are a couple, baby." He smiled at that, hiding his face in her shoulder making her chuckle. He was adorable when he got all shy from her petnames. She knew he loved it when she called him baby the most.
"Wanted everyone to know..." he whined into her skin, apparently not done with the topic yet. She rolled her eyes at what she was about to do to appease him. She really is down bad for this guy.
She pulled out her red lipstick and her phone, reaplying the colour to her lips while he watched her like it was the most fascinating sight in the world.
"Here." She planted a big kiss on his cheek, leaving a print of her lips on his skin. He blushed as she showed him his face on the phone screen, feeling all giddy again.
"Happy now?" She was starting to annoy herself with her need to make him happy tonight.
"Yes. Thank you." He hugged her again, taking in the smell of her hair, feeling sated at last.
As soon as things were starting to feel somewhat peaceful again, Aaron had to make a comeback. She had no patience left in her body for anyone's bullshit and she figured it was around time to get going anyways. She looked down at Rafe, sleepily leaning on her, eyes drooping, realizing he was ready for bed.
"Time for bed, baby?" He groaned in disaproval, not wanting to end the night yet.
"Hungry." She barely managed to make out his mumbling. She hadn't seen any food around except for some chips which was not really good enough to sate a stomach as drunk as his. He needed actual food.
"How about we get you to your room and I order something? Hm?" He looked cute, thinking it over, she could practically see the wheels in his head turning with concentration.
"But we're supposed to go back to yours." The little pout was back on his lips and she realized he pouted a lot when he was drunk.
"I don't think I can carry you back to my place, baby. We can ask Mac for help up the stairs yeah?" He shook his head, the movement clearly making him temporarily dizzy and she worried he might end up falling over.
"M'not that drunk." The slur in his words contradicting his conviction. She simply rolled her eyes and located Mac who was also quite drunk but seemed still capable of helping her out.
"Mac!" The brunet immediately made his way to where the two were standing. "Help me get him upstairs?" He wasted no time nodding and grabbing his best friend under his arms to drag him to his room. Rafe protested again but after stumbling decided to keep his mouth shut and accept the help. He could still walk to an extent so Mac didn't need her help, managing to get him to his room fairly quick helping him down on his bed.
"I'm sorry." He kept apologizing, feeling bad for ruining the night. She disagreed. She'd had plenty of fun with him tonight and him being drunk was but a minor inconveniece to an overall good time. She explained this to him, kissing his cheek in reassurance.
Mac had made himself scarce quickly and she was thankful for the privacy and the quiet of the room. She ordered them both a burger and fries and played with his hair while they waited. It didn't take long for him to doze off.
Once her phone pinged, she snuck out not to wake him and made her way outside to get the food, pushing past the rest of the drunken party downstairs. When she came back his eyes were barely open, it seemed he had woken up by her absence. She smiled showing him the food and he returned it, stomach grumbling with hunger.
They finished their food quite quickly, given how hungry they were, throwing the trash in the bag to be dealt with tomorrow. She changed into his t-shirt and despite the sleepiness overcoming him, his eyes still stared at her body, unable to control himself when she was so damn beautiful. She caught him staring and chuckled at his awestruck expression. He had the same look on every time he saw her undress.
"Come on baby, lets get you changed, hm?" She helped him pull his shirt off and struggled to take off his pants but eventually managed. He had an adorable grin on his face as she made herself comfortable beside him. She reached for him and he immediately made himself at home in her arms. Sleeping with her had become one of his absolute favorite things in the world. He never sleeps better than when he's wrapped up in her arms.
"Good night." He whispered into her hair and she laid a light kiss on his temple as the exhaustion finally caught up to her.
"Good night, my angel."
.........................................
Taglist: if anyone wants to be tagged in future work let me know; @torturedtypewritersdept @kinkyrafe @mentallynot-here @wishing-i-was-rafes-princess @clinelyn @magnificantmermaid @mannstarkey @harringtonstudios @totallynotkaibiased @popcrone818 @fangirlwithlou @rafesxgold @malfoytargaryen @theyluvmesblog @withbeautyandrage @sierrahhh @harrys-humble-housewife @piceous21 @ditzyballerina @xoxo3m1ly @jessmaybank @whore-4-drewstarkey @palmwinemami @dustbunniess @sublimepenguinpeach-blog @starkowswife @ietss @beansprout713 @starkeysbebe @miahxelizabeth @lalalalala33
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wimmipimmi · 2 days ago
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Important Things
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Pairing: Lara Croft x GN!Reader
Requested By: @innammoratta
Word Count: ???
Summary: You and Lara are best friends in the middle of searching for the box of Ix Chel. When she gets injured and you two stop for the night to take care of her wounds, things come out that you never thought would.
Tags/Warnings: Lara and reader are best friends, based on the jaguar fight scene in the 'Shadow of the Tomb Raider' game, confessions, kissing, talk of Lara fighting the jaguar and skinning it, but nothing graphic or violent
A/N: This has been *checks calendar* over a year in the making 🧍‍♀️I am so sorry to the person that requested this that it took me this long, me and writing are a weird one, but I finally managed to knock this out 🤩 hope it is to your liking, and to all the Lara Croft lovers out there, enjoy! 🫶🏻
-
"Shit, Lara!" You strain to shout, fear buzzing through your body as you feel your heartbeat racing inside your chest.
Your sight of her is somewhat obscured by branches and other flora, but you can see enough to watch her as she struggles against the jaguars grip, its nails and teeth clawing against Lara's skin, and the sound of her in pain does nothing to make you feel more calm.
Fuck, fuck, fuck!
Hands on your head, you wrack your brain as for how to help, but your brain seems to blank, the only thing it's focusing on is seeing Lara in this dangerous situation. Your heart feels like it's about to explode, and your breathing has now become quickened and shallow. You hit yourself lightly on the head, eyes squeezed tightly shut as you force your brain to think.
If she dies right now, that's on you.
The though seems to kick your brain back to life as before you know it, you've grabbed the flare gun from your left pant leg strap and thrown it under the piece of stone towards a still struggling Lara.
"Lara! Flare gun!" You shout, hoping and praying that she gets it and can shoot the jaguar in time.
Everything seems to slow down as you watch Lara move to grab the gun, just narrowly missing another attack. Eyes becoming blurry as your fear increases, you can't properly make out anything else that seems to happen.
Crack.
Blinking rapidly, your eyes finally focus, noticing little sparks. Then a quick blur passing you makes you realise that you did it. She did it. Lara is back up with her bow drawn, ready to release it.
Hope bubbles up in your stomach, releasing a breath you didn't realise you were holding. Your fingers grip the long and heavy piece of stone, trying to lift it up enough so you can get underneath and help her but to no avail.
"Shit." You whisper to yourself as you pant, most of your energy having been exhausted.
You helplessly watch as Lara skillfuly takes out the jaguar, one well placed shot at a time.
"Lara!" You cry out once you see the animal drop dead, worried about her condition. Her head turns immediately to where you are, and she makes her way over towards you.
Without a word, you both lift up the stone, and you crawl underneath to the other side as quickly as you can. As soon as she drops it, you're quick to envelope her in a hug, tears streaming down your face.
"I'm so glad you're okay!" A hiss makes you immediately release your hold, resting your hands on her upper arms instead.
"I'm so sorry Lara. I wish I could've helped you more, I-"
"Hey, hey, it's okay, you helped me more than you know-"
"But it's not okay! I mean you could've-. You could've died Lara!"
She grabs your hands from her arms and holds them in front of you both. Your crying subsides a little, and you subconsciously welcome the warmth her hands bring to yours.
"But I'm not. I'm right here in front of you. And I'm not going anywhere. Understood?" She ressures you, her tone serious but with a sweet tinge.
You sniffle, a wobbly smile rising onto your lips, and one appears on Lara's too when she notices yours. Yours eyes flicker over her form, and that's when you notice just how battered and exhausted she looks.
"Are you okay?" You ask so quietly it's almost a whisper.
She releases her hands from yours and shrugs.
"I'm fine, just a little shaken up."
She turns and walks over to the jaguar to begin skinning it, and your eyes turn into saucers as you notice the huge gash on her back.
"Holy shit, Lara... your back." You exhale out. She stands up and turns to you after she's done. You grab her free hand.
"Come on, let's get you cleaned up." Is all you can say, a million thoughts wracking through your brain.
-
It's nighttime, the both of you having found a place to start a fire and seek shelter for the night so you both can rest up and eat. Much to Lara's protest, you're in the middle of helping her clean up her wounds on her back as she's sewing something you can't exactly make yet out of the jaguar skin she got before.
"Sorry." You whisper out as you hear her hiss again from the pain of you dabbing a part of her back with an antiseptic and cloth.
"I had a dream about my mother recently."
You perk your head up, even though Lara can't see you.
"Yeah?"
"Yeah. It was so vivid." You hear the happiness in her voice. You feel a smile perk up on your lips as you continue to take care of her wounds. It's quiet for a moment.
"I miss her."
You pause what you're doing and look at the back of her head. A pained grin appears on your mouth for a split second, then you continue to finish bandaging up her injury.
"I know you do."
Another moment goes by.
"If you had the box, then power to have any type of world you wished for. Would you do it." Lara asks you.
You ponder for a moment, a few ideas floating around your brain. But when your eyes fall back to her dark hair in front of you, you know your answer.
"No. I don't think I would."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah. As much as there are plenty of things I would change in this world, everything I love is already in it." You say gently as you finish the last bandage, smoothing out Lara's back.
She feels that you've finished and turns around to face you, a small smile on her face.
"Like your stupid rock collection, or sushi, or your gaming console, huh?" She quips, an all-knowing smirk appearing on her lips.
You scoff and playfully roll your eyes, them landing back on her lips as you both start laughing.
"Yes, of course there are those, but there are also more important things than that."
"Like what?" She asks, and both of your laughing dies down.
Looking in her eyes, you notice how they're illuminated by the fire. You would walk through the fire in her eyes to truly see into her being and stay there.
Instinctively, you bring your right hand up and cup the side of her face. Her eyes widen. You gently rub your thumb on her cheek back and forth.
An owl hoots in the distance, cutting you out of whatever trance you were in. Blinking a few times, the realisation of what you've done hits you, and you go to pull your hand away.
"Oh my gosh, I'm so-"
You feel something stop you. Looking down, you see Lara's hand around your wrist. Your eyes flicker over to her face, and you notice her becoming a little flustered.
"No... it's okay." Lara whispers out as she slowly brings your palm back to the side of her face, leaning into it a little.
You swallow nervously, senses hightened by her touch. Has she always been this close to you this entire time? You were unsure, but couldn't think any further on it as you both stare into each others' eyes.
It feels so nice, you feel yourself getting warmer, an almost burning sensation in your chest. That's when the thought pops into your head.
You really want to kiss her.
You know you shouldn't. She's been your best friend for how many years? You're one of the only close people she has left. If you do anything stupid now and ruin what you two have, it'd be more devastating. But the urge doesn't leave, it crawling through your veins like an itch you can't scratch.
And then you see it.
Her eyes. Flicker down. To your lips.
You freeze at the realisation. What this could possibly mean.
You really want to kiss her.
Your eyes search hers, looking for something, though you're not sure what. Her eyes lock onto yours.
You really want to kiss her.
You notice her face move slowly towards yours as she moves her hand from your wrist all the way up your arm, around your shoulder, down your back until it sits on your waist.
You really want to kiss her.
Her face stops an inch before yours, so close you can feel her breath on your face. She looks into your eyes again one more time, as if she's waiting for you to pull back in disgust and adamantly say no.
You do nothing of the sort.
You kiss her.
The feeling of her lips is nothing like you've felt before. They're a little chapped, but it doesn't matter because you're kissing her.
You kiss her for what feels like minutes, as if you've been starved of her. Moving closer to each other, your other hand moves to the back of her neck, threading the tops of your fingers through her hair, whilst her other hand rests on your thigh.
When you both stop, you rest your foreheads against each other's, looking into each other's eyes as you both sheepishly smile.
A silence passes.
"You."
Confusion contorts on Lara's face.
"What?"
"I wouldn't change this world because you're in it."
Lara smiles lovingly at you as she rubs her thumb against your thigh.
"I wouldn't either."
~
Thank you so much for reading and I hope you all enjoyed! My ask box is open and currently taking any requests! Please check my pinned post for who I write and some rules. Have a great day :)
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faaun · 11 months ago
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Jack Marsh (2005), Friendship Otherwise - Toward a Levinasian Description of Personal Friendship
#saw carnation lily lily rose by john singer seargent irl today. it was basically at my doorstep all along idk why i never went to see it#it was placed at a corner in the gallery. me and my friend sat down and sketched the paintings of beautiful naked people quite badly. paper#provided by tate britain. she told me about how she couldnt look her boyfriend in the face after a harrowing film about war. when i say the#interview was informal i mean the person who was supposed to be my boss told me let me get you a cider and then he said after#50 years of life he knows people are inherently good and it only takes a little bit of kindness to save this world. he said he tricked#his wife into keeping the baby and then he said he quit his job at a US bank to help people find meaning and in it#he would have liked to find meaning. instead he started climbing with his friends. he said he chews his cigarettes because its a habit from#when he had to hide things from people. the entire time i felt uncomfortable and incredibly enlightened. this is my friends mentor. she has#his pattern of pauses and expletive and penchant for ends-justify-means attitude. i do think im not very clever#but maybe one day i will love you enough to make up for it. i wrote code i dont understand staring at the final error i thought about how#we both thought of how when we're too old to remember the voices of our friends we would like to stand in the pathway of the LHC beam pipe#cut it open and eat light in the freezing cold vacuum (kills you long before radiation will) the invisible puncture wound unfolding dna#back to the start larger than you ever were. you go to heaven once youve been to hell. my friend is in my bed#practicing calculations of eigenvectors by hand and she is uninterested in a visual proof you are uninterested in incompetence#we catch a train this is your kind of burden you tragic hero wincing at that word you only do this because you have to. im the only one#who can. i am a coward in this for the fucking poetry. the visual proofs. the pretty numbers. an architect who was horrible at maths wanted#to be a philosopher and accidentally ended up neck in deep in 70th Error On Visual Studio Code i want to kiss your eyes before we say#goodbye we both know there is no love in the way there should be. I still have your dress in my wardrobe. i hope you make art.#you think im alright head-wise i think you fucking hate me i think ill never be so clever you want me to tell you my idea?#if you wanted more of this world i would have liked to kiss you harder. we cant both be like this. im sorry i cant be with you the whole wa#the love is gone if you have to ask it. his breath catches his eyes feel stiff it is -1.9 kelvin he is near the beam pipe i miss holding#his hand i miss her singing voice i miss his hair and i found the antonym of pain thank you for carrying me home.
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benevolenterrancy · 1 month ago
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hi! I recently came across your tgcf fics, and I wanted to say you’re a phenomenal creator. the recovery series fic and the gloves fic and just all of them. thank you for your content and great attention to detail.
do you have any thoughts/hcs on FXMQ and Xie Lian you’d be willing to share? within the original story or the universes of your fics!
Thank you so much, I'm glad you're enjoying them! (ノ*^▽^*)ノ.。:*☆
hmm, random thoughts about the FXMQ... a silly headcanon: Feng Xin has very much been hoisted by his own petard by heckling Mu Qing! That is to say, he'll harass Mu Qing relentlessly about something stupid only to be confronted with a similar situation and realise that there's absolutely NO way he can act in anyway similar to Mu Qing or he'll never hear the end of it.
(For example, he has tolerated some truly atrocious divine statues in the past because he's heckled Mu Qing so much about how picky he is with his divine statues that there's no WAY he can say ANYTHING without seeing that smug bastard's face in his head so he just has to bite his tongue and tolerate some unspeakably ugly statues.)
Mu Qing doesn't generally suffer from similar overthinking (he'll just prepare to kick FX's ass if he dares to say anything about it) except for things more directly related to himself. I think he genuinely finds sewing/embroidery/etc rather relaxing work but he'd rather die than have anyone ever see him do it because he's made such a big deal about not doing that sort of "servant" work anymore.
(He actually really enjoyed stitching Ruoye back together because it gave him the perfect excuse -- he's returning a favour!! and Xie Lian is hopeless!! of course he had to!! -- and he secretly considered using white thread to embroider some invisible little designs just because he doesn't quite want to stop... only he knew he'd get caught if he messed with Xie Lian's spiritual device like that and gave up the idea)
#tgcf#bene speaks#so anon will you send me a FXMQ hc back?? 👀 i know others have given that pair more thought than i have#though it does all make me wonder how mu qing (and feng xin) would feel about ruoye after learning about its origins#more fond or more resentful?#or guiltily realise that its been too long and they don't feel anything at all about it but wonder#if they should - if they would if they were better people#this is an irreverent goofy little idea off the top of my head but i dunno... i haven't written much with these guys yet#but i have thoughts#their entire dynamic with xie lian#the way they are so wholly in need of each other but also so intensely distanced from each other is... *chefs kiss*#none of them are REALLY friends by the end of the main series#not really#were they ever friends? proper friends? hard to say since we only have xl's pov and his pov is really biased especially in regard#to his past behaviour - he judges himself quite harshly#were they friends? did was the hierarchy between them mean that they never really COULD cross that divide?#i like to think they were and they did but still. 800 years is a long time#feng xin and mu qing have SUCH a horrifically and deliciously complicated relationship#there's so many old resentments between them + inherent ties that can't quite break + jun wu's fucking meddling#(and my GOD jun wu's meddling in that trio... would love to pick at that more... that would be a great fic#one that parallels fx/mq(/xl) and yy/qyz... give me a hurt/comfort fic that builds on that god#i am fascinated by what a renewed friendship could look like between them after 800 years now that they're all on somewhat equal footing#we got a great taste of mu qing wanting to move past old grudges and really pursue that which healed me after the wwx&jc ending in mdzs#but they all have so much baggage to shed and things to talk about... man it'd be intense#so yeah. this is a long tag ramble to say i definitely HAVE SOME FUCKING THOUGHTS about the mess that is the xianle trio (quartet)#anyway thanks for asking anon that was fun to ramble about
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allastoredeer · 6 months ago
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If I had to choose between the next chapter of "Just Kiss Already" and the next episode of Helluva Boss, I would choose "Just Kiss Already" every single time. When can we expect the next chapter?? Also do you have a discord server? If not, you should definitely consider making one. You legit have your own fan base now and everybody is talking about your fic. Even people who aren't into radioapple know about it. ITS REALLY THAT GOOD!
People -
Wait. People have been talking about my fic O///O Non-radioapple shippers are talking about my fic, I'm - this is news to me O.O The only social media I'm on is Tumblr and Twitter, and for Twitter I'm just there for the fan-art. That's wild that people are talking about it (°ロ°) I'm so flattered >.< I'm glad they're enjoying it!
Also a discord server 👀is that something you guys would be interested in? Technically, I do already have one. I'd just have to do some major spring cleaning before I opened it up again LOL Mayhaps I'll do another poll and see what the general consensus is.
Also also 🥰 that fact that you'd choose the next chapter to "JKA" over the new Helluva Boss episode is one most flattering things' anyone has ever said to me ♥‿♥ (I am so excited for the next episode to drop, I can't wait to be beaten down with angst)
As for when the next chapter will come out, my goal is between May 11-15. I was going to split the whole fic into 4 chapters, but I couldn't split up the last section in a natural way, so it's a pretty long one. Chapter 2 started out as 4,000+ words and after editing it ended up 8,000+ words. Chapter 3 is currently at 6,000+ words, and it hasn't been edited yet, so my estimate based on the last chapter is that it might top out at 10,000+ words 😅
If I can find a way to split it up naturally as I'm editing, I probably will. But if not, that's a lot to edit (for both me and my beta's), so it'll take longer than the last two chapters. (Toiling under the weight of capitalism definitely doesn't help either).
Thank you for this ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ What a way to make my day!!
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It's been a while since the initial announcement, but any thoughts about Life is Strange: Double Exposure?
I watched the trailer and y'know what? I'm intrigued. I actually look forward to playing it. I looks nice, the murder mystery and parallel timelines concept sounds interesting, and I want to see what Max is like after all this time. How's she coping with and healing from all the trauma she went through in the first game?
I haven't watched anything other than the trailer and I'm not keeping tabs on any updates or anything, though. I know that Chloe's not in the trailer and a lot of people are upset about that but like... I'm not mad, haha. Listen, I have a complicated relationship with Chloe Price as a character and I'm not a pricefield shipper by any means, so if this game takes place in the timeline where Chloe died then I won't be too upset.
If anything, I think this game taking place in that timeline would be way more compelling, especially since this story seems to be about Max attempting to prevent the death of yet another friend of hers. She said she swore to never use her powers again, too. I think it'd make sense for her to say that in either timeline, but more so in this one.
However, I know a lot of people would be pissed so it makes me wonder just what they're doing here. It's difficult to take both endings into account unless they do something where if Chloe's alive, she's just not present. Maybe she and Max talk on the phone or Max makes references to where she is... but that would feel cheap, no? Especially to fans who love the original game for the Chloe and Max dynamic, platonic or romantic, and would want to see it now that they're both older and away from Arcadia Bay. I mean, how are they handling themselves after the tornado destroyed everything?
Maybe Chloe is around and the trailer just doesn't want to show her. Again, I don't know if anything's been confirmed and y'all are welcome to let me know.
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mewhenifreakit · 2 months ago
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curled up by the fire, tail waggin
#long day puppies in my phone long day#so so tired i dont have class tmr cos lecture not there so i get to sleep in yay but i wake up early anyways woah just dont Have to be up#going to try meet a friend because i feel like i havent seen anyon outside of college in months even tho its been 2 weeks#this old friend if mine kinda lowkey ditched me when he got a bucnh of new friends like 2 yesrs ago and hes been reaching out a lot to try#hangout and like hm im hurt abiut how he dropped me and he like genrally wasnt a great friend anyways:/ but i feel bad being kike i cant#hang but i also amnt even lyin genuinely cant hang i havent seen my best friend in so long i only see college and my home and therapist once#but also like ugh i dont like this guy i need him to not be beggin me to hang he could be reslly mean like too often but he was nice ..ugh#i wish there was a chill bot harsh way to cut domeone out like i dont hate u i just dont love u soz#and i love my friends so so deeply like i only have time for my besties who i would est whole if i could pike the way people talk about#their blorbo from my shows is how i feel talking about my friends like i want to squish them and poke em n kiss em their my little loves#so if i dont even like someone idk like i dont have time for people j dont love or who dont give a shit about me#hashtag being autistic and my 3 close friends are all also auttistic genuinly the 3 of them got diagnosed in the past 4 yesrs..dominos#i miss my friends wailing college too busy i miss my babies#n i feel really bad for not wanting to hang with this guy who litersllybdidnt care if i lived or died like a year ago#but now is all about me strangely#anyways hm will possible rant more ive had such a long day and nowmim currles on pillows in a bjg hoodie and its so good
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vogelmeister · 7 months ago
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been feeling mixed on some of my friends recently
#i love them but im gonna explain#i don’t want this to boil over like the twins did#but one of my friends i feel so cast off sometimes#i get it bc shes full time adult job employed now#in healthcare no less#but im just getting fully annoyed at her lack of availability and it makes me sad#im getting even sadder actually bc she also always seems to have time to hang with her uni friends whuch hurts#like im like okay i know you have this from 6-7 so how about we meet for dinner at 7:30 bc i wanna see you casually and she says no#and i think i really need to talk to her bc it makes me sad and then i feel slapped in the face#even on nights out we always have to go home early. which my friend basically said:#i think in future if you wanna go home you can but others shouldn’t have to too#bc my other friend got so sad she was forced to come back early and i was like yea i would have liked to have sat at manly with yall#bc i feel we don’t do this any more#i honestly think it’s better to just let her figure it out and go#i don’t want me to sweep so much shit under the rug until i despise her#bc i know this isn’t her fault i just wish she would let loose or make an effort#my other situation is my childhood best friend#i love her a lot she’s amazing. but but but. sometimes i feel she can be too protective of me.#it comes from a place of knowing me for so long#and i do trust her opinions on people who i surround myself with bc she fucking hated those twins#but sometimes i feel she has been treating me differently since my neurodivergence diagnosis#even with a certain high school friend she held this dislike even when i said she was not like the twins#bc she was hanging out with the twins at the 21st#like this girl was also having her issues with the twins and was the person in the firing line of the breakup#even when i was in nl she was so worried about me and its nice to have her have my back#bc after that guy kissed me directly on the lips she suddenly became concerned about ppl taking advantage of me#and its like to me great she cares but also i did in fact learn from it#but she gets super defensive when ppl take advantage of me and i just wanna her to step back#i just feel sometimes i don’t need her feeling like she needs to protect me or that i need to hang neurodivergence up like a flag#idk its a lot. thank u for listening
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carrotpiss · 10 months ago
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🐰🧡🐻
#in stark contrast to most of my personal posts this is about me being happy and gay#because i need to just get it out my system bc otherwise i am just going to grab a friend by the shoulders and scream (in joy) in their face#i am dating someone and its really really nice and sweet and cute and like nothing ive ever experienced before#and instead its like every tiny little dream about this kind of thing ive managed to hold onto despite every experience otherwise and ahhhh#the lack of focus on just sex or sex appeal is so nice its like there but as a side thing so its nice and i dont feel like an object#i feel like a human person with thoughts and feelings and interests outside if that and feel safe in that and feel safe that everything wont#just be discarded if i dont want to do that like i feel like boundaries and stuff are an option! without jeopardising everything#and el likes me as much as i like them and wants and sees and communicates that they want something long term and ahhhhhhhh#i just want to cry like holy shit this is everything ive ever wondered about like i have spent so long wondering what this feeling would#actually feel like and its so good and so indescribable and ahhhhhhh#waking up on monday night and seeing them in my bed and cuddling me was just so nice i felt wanted i felt... loved#this all seems so out of left field still i still feel like i just never saw it coming but its so welxome and nice and ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh#my pessimism is still there but its less loud now its more learning to accept this may not be perfect forever but letting me enjoy the now#crouch speaks#it feels so nice to not be scared and to feel secure and ahhh#also it made me laugh El remembered me hitting on then at the Dgoals release show making them blush lol#i only remember the time i hit on them later at the groles show so its funny i pretty much used the same line twice and it still worked#i cant wait to see them again i cant wait to hold hands in public again i cant wait to be idiots who keep blushing too hard and accidentally#kissing eachother on the nose instead of the mouth because we are stupid and gay and pathetic about it hahaha#just ahhhh i could gush forever how perfect the 2!!! dates weve been on were and the fact they want more and more and ahhhhh#this is so lame i know i just haven't experienced anything remotely like this before and its just... wild#like wow holy shit what on earth i have been so increasingly miserablely depressed and insecure from the shea stuff last year and then this#just absolutely removed all of that i actually feel like a human person again with value
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animutate · 1 year ago
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man i dontthink i can be in a real relationship ever again im just starting to process how everyone has treated me HORRIBLY
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