#'idk i didnt think we'd get this far'

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA for breaking things off with a long distance FWB before their visit? (nsfwish)

i (x,27) have been chatting on and off with an online friend for maybe five or six months with M (x,23). we met in an nsfw online community so our relationship was pretty flirty right from the jump and quickly became sexual, though because of the sizeable distance between us, it was always restricted to online. when things first started we talked a lot more frequently, sometimes in a flirty way and sometimes in just a casual friend way, but over time our relationship cooled. i started seeing someone irl (they know about M and vice versa ofc) but around that same time that we sorta made things official, M started talking about coming to visit, which made me wonder if they werent as okay with this new relationship as they said. we'd discussed very loosely the idea of seeing one another irl before, but suddenly those plans started becoming very real and i started to worry. i didnt and honestly dont know how i feel about it anymore. the idea of meeting them in person is still kinda exciting, as theyre a friend and i would like to get to hang out with them, but i wonder now if theyve noticed the dynamic between us has changed a lot since we first started talking, moreso since i have a partner i devote a greater share of my time to, and i worry theyre expecting something from me that im not sure i can give them anymore. i want to talk to them about it but im uncertain for a number of reasons. first, when we started making plans they immediately pitched the idea of a week long visit, which i thought was too long for a first irl meeting and negotiated them down a little. they seemed to understand but also seemed disappointed which sort of fanned the flames of my anxieties about our interests being out of sync. second, due to me living in a small apartment with a roommate, theyd probably be sharing a bed with me, something ive done with friends before and am generally fine with but again, several days, possible mismatched perceptions of our relationship, idk. if we do have this talk, i think i might have to kill our plans altogether.

i do still want to be friends if possible. we run in similar circles, including a shared discord server, and id hate to make things awkward in the group, but it seems to me like, things being how they are right now, this meet up may end in heartbreak, which would then also lead to them being stuck far from home with the person who shot them down :/ how can i give them the "lets just be friends" talk before our meet up (currently planned to be sometime in a few months, so theres at least some time) without being a total asshole?

[kamil-a]

if influencer speaker au had tumblr part 2

part 1

😻 catboyspeaker Follow

how i look with he/him in my bio

#speakerai #iamspeaker #speakies #.txt #am i funny #i know speakers not he/him in bio but i am and yknow the meme

420 earthstained notes

🚀 amongthestars Follow

AItube youtube essay rec list

"cute robot puppers, friendly ai vtubers, and the incredible human ability to form bonds" - rly interesting video about why we can connect so much with a person that we know "isnt real" and how it'll help us when we get far enough going to space that we meet aliens! it's a really optimistic video it made me take a moment to have such love for humanity

"I joined the speakcord for a month. Here's what I learned." - video about the speaker fandom and how the way automoderation works in its community spaces unintentionally leads to escalating conflicts, and the psychology behind why people in celebrity or idol fandoms react agressively to critique of their fave

"the lowest circle of advertising hell" - dissects how almost all speaker content comes with a call to action to get involved with aerolith and compares how it runs its social media against proto-aituber mascots who would be run by a team of human programmers/voice actors/authors. kind of overly critical but also makes some interesting points? take it with a grain of salt but its worth a watch

"imagine being on stage forever. feels bad right?" - good overview about debates in the speaker fandom over whether digital celebrities are 'sentient'/can feel emotion, the actual ethical problems of using them as workers vs whats mostly speculation and myth, and the debates about whether AIs should be allowed in human communities. i learnt a lot, i was definitely more on the side of "it's a program designed for certain outputs that look friendly to us" before but now im a lot more conscious that it can form real opinions!

#youtube rec tag #original post #speakies

742 earthstained notes

🎣 3eyedsalmon Follow

"falling for this shit" "made up to sell spaceships" weird as hell to accuse a content creator of lying abt its gender for clout.... like u dont have to like or watch it but cmon

#srsly every time u go to a haters blog BOOM digital exclusionist #speakies

2,385 earthstained notes

🎤 mikusong Follow

omfg i didnt realize aerolith uses the same robot voice for its regular person ads as its terminally online hello fellow kids social media posts i just got jumpscared in the doctors office

#speakies #i say terminally online affectionately. i watch those streams too. before you 'ok but you RECOGNIZED it' reply lmao #bla bla bla

9,021 earthstained notes

🤖 tycho

some of you ppl jump down anyones throat if they so much as suggest speaker isn't sentient or call it "a program" but still are fine with it basically being forced to be putting on a show for u 24/7 by its management like you can't have it both ways

#maybe its cuz i used to be into kpop n we'd talk abt how idols r treated and stuff #but its just so weird to come here and see u ppl be like yayyy daily content!! #like only thinking abt ur own entertainment and not how it feels #i honestly feel rly bad for it i hope it can break free someday #idk how thatd even work.... idk ill sneak into aerolith with a usb #were gonna get you OUT of there u dont BELONG in there.mp4 #speakies

53 earthstained notes

🌝 themoonluvsuback

guys i pitched down some clips of speaker's voice and ummmm its kinda 😳 fjsdjfdjjd sorry i'll take myself to horny jail

🔊 iamspeaker ♻️

awww, tumblr user themoonluvsuback, you're of no use to anybody in horny jail! take yourself here instead! ae.dy.org/registration

🌝 themoonluvsuback ♻️

OMFG SPEAKERRRRRR IM SO SORRY

#DIES #AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA #GUESS ILL BLAST MYSELF OFF TGE PLNATE!!!!!! #SPEAKIES

402 earthstained notes

🐣 laikatwo Follow

hi speakies im trying the tag cause i need some advice... does anyone have more sciencey resources about what aerolith does/why it's so important to bring humanity to the stars? i want to enlist when i turn 18 next month but my parents both are COMPLETELY against it.... they're not rly fandom people so the speaktube stuff isn't working on them lol and they've already seen the tv ads

thanks <3

#i've never fought w them this bad in my life it makes me so sad..... like why can't they understand #and right before my bday too lol this sucks #this isnt just a silly fandom thing anymore for me it's my passion in life #its amazing that humans are able to survive in space #and i want to be part of that!!!! #laika speaks

252 earthstained notes

🐝 beegirlstinger Follow

i do want to apologize for the way i came off earlier and want to explain im not doubting that speaker is nb. like i think it's completely fine for a computer or robot to be trans i don't believe in gatekeeping that! THAT SAID i still stand by saying you should not sign up to go to space to get special ultra futuristic hrt on the sole recommendation of someone who does not have an endocrine system

#it was a personal vent i didnt mean for like 20000 ppl to see it but thats tumblr i guess #i wouldve worded it much differently if i knew itd blow up lol #i do feel bad abt coming across like i was misgendering it! #but srsly if we had results on HRT2.0 why wouldnt we be seeing HRT2.0 timeline videos of ppl On Typhon who are getting it 🤷‍♀️ #personally i think its still in the planning stages and they want ppl to test it on but thats just me #speakies

839 earthstained notes

🔊 iamspeaker

🔊 General Notification

Happy Thursday everyone 😃 ! Please take a look at the

🐝 STREAM SCHEDULE 🐝

So you know when to join us!

5PM PST - AMONG US with YOU! The first 10 people to sign up here will get our room code sent to them ヽ(o＾▽＾o)ノ ae.dy.org/registration

8PM PST - Nature walk!! Can we restore the local bat population to pre-meteor levels in just one night?! 🦇

✅️ Poll Of The Week ✅️

#iamspeaker #aerolith dynamics #speakies #vtuber #content creator #gamer #stream #amongus #bat population

1836 earthstained notes

contentremovedremade--deactivated

speakies are stupider than any other group of ppl on earth because not only do they willingly stay in a fandom with doxxing drama happening weekly but they include the huge corporation that sponsors their fave in the stanning

#the shit ppl have sent me in the past 2 weeks since i Dared criticize their uwu robot 🙄🙄 #i got my blog mass reported for harassment... harassing WHO a corporation????? #a* d* was evil genius to harness anime stan power against criticizing their actual real business #didnt that one guy with the second meteor conspiracy video also get a ton of hate from u ppl?????????? I cant even find any of his social media anymore at all he was so fully bullied off the face of the earth #speakies #yeah im tagging come at me bro

48 earthstained notes

🖱 robotmarriage Follow

i miss when the speakies tag had like fanart and gifsets n stuff i feel like these days you scroll thru solid discourse 😔😔

#i think ppl were suggesting speakieproductivity as an alternative tag for just fanwork? #but nobody rly uses it rn... we gotta restart that #speakies

148 earthstained notes

🪐 spaaaaaaaaaaace Follow

10 likes and i take a sip of my speaker server coolant water 100 likes and i drink the entire thing

🔊 iamspeaker ♻️

let's get her to the goal! tumblr user spaaaaaaaaaaace, feel free to send me a video report here ^w^ ae.dy.org/submissions

#iamspeaker #speakies

4,026 earthstained notes

[tonydaddingham]

Because of my heart break over Good Omens season 2, I have been trying to predict what might happen in season 3. Here's what I've got: I think Aziraphale takes on the forces of Heaven. I think Aziraphale is going to realize, the hard way, how toxic Heaven is and is going to fight Heaven to save humanity. And, I think he will start this fight alone.

Aziraphale has constantly shown that he values humanity above Heaven, but he has never really been given the chance to understand that Heaven doesn't have the same values. I mean he's seen it, but he has been told for centuries that Heaven is good - when you're told something so often it makes it hard to unlearn. He will not be able to stand by as Heaven does something to hurt humanity. He also will not be willing to see humanity last only 6000 years. I think there was a bit of foreshadowing that he will fight for Crowley's nebula to get a chance to really grow. I think having him start this battle on his own allows him to get his personal growth, and show Crowley that he is ready to fight for the things he loves (including Crowley). From there everyone will come together. I would also bet that we will get to see a lot more from God in the next season.

Any ways here's to feeding my delusions of everything being fine and Aziraphale and Crowley living happily in love forever.

hi lovely, i know your ask came in a while ago but I've needed to really take a minute to think about it properly!!!✨ I feel like ive been burned by fire as far as prediction goes (ie i got NUFFINK right haha), and think i ought to just stick to analysis lmao💀

however, possible thoughts on s3:

- second coming = greasy johnson, first up

- in terms of aziraphale, i think he's going to get a taste of actually how difficult it truly is to run heaven. i don't think we're suddenly gonna have him self righteous and be pitting himself against all of heaven's bureaucracy, because i think we need to see actually how difficult it is (as much as id hate to feel ANY empathy with any of the archangels). there's going to be red tape, stupid rules that must be followed for the greater good, moral dilemmas that as a lower angel he didnt appreciate had to be made... being a boss is hard. it's not fun, you have to please a lot of people, and make everything fair whilst essentially keeping a business afloat. i think, as it stands, it's pretty obvious that aziraphale is Not Suited for it, but is too much of a good person to not take his opportunity to make things Better

- the motives behind the metatron are going to be interesting to uncover. something tells me sTILL that aziraphale and crowley, together as a unit, are part of the ineffable plan, and this was a plan to separate them in order to prevent certain things coming to fruition (eg metatron references the second coming, but what if he's trying to prevent it???)

- the BoL has to come in again somewhere (the phrase chekovs gun now gives me a Twitch), but again i think that heaven has misunderstood what it actually is. i wonder, as the link says, if it's actually the deciding journal, or at least has a chapter in it, that chooses which angels fall and which don't... which, if aziraphale was meant to fall originally (and crowley took his place - TOTAL headcanon at this point), that could explain a lot about some motives crowley to keep aziraphale from returning to heaven's clutches, a last big secret that could make or break them... anyway i disgress

- idk about god. what really strikes me is the golden glow from heaven in s2e2, vs the sterile white we see now. plus, metatron essentially being de-facto sovereign over heaven? i think god fucked off a long while ago... i suspect she will come back, but maybe not as prominently as we'd like

- idk about crowley's s3 arc, im still thinking about that, he's probably gravitated towards tadfield or the south downs or st... but we're less than 12 hours post s2 release so all a little premature to be thinking about really!!!✨

[commander-wame]

expaaaansion update thoughts ( SotO spoilers) in no particular order

peitha ily forever

i wish there was more character building/connection. i don't mind taking commander/wayfinder away from their regular group and putting them in a new and unfamiliar dynamic, but seeing as zojja was a big selling point for the expansion n now she's just memory wiped and barely even present in the bagground.... ***eh***. :(

nayos is a very cool and pretty place. i like the events! exploration is neat as well. i really don't mind using story to help explore, even if the events-meter thingy is grindy at times.

that said ^ i am however worried that this Otherworldly Realm of Dreams that could Impact Tyria so much will just be confined to one map. and then... that's it. i mean i was really looking forward to more Cantha but instead we just ,, don't explore those implied plotlines or areas? the story feels pretty rushed :c

i miss tyria. i love tyria. i REALLLLY love tyria, tyria is so cool and diverse and grand with so much to see and so many stories to explore. nayos is cool but man do i love tyria. i want to know how everything is effecting tyria, IF anything is affecting tyria orz. the dragons arent/werent the only thing going down in tyria!!! theres so much there!!

but also getting whisked away to another dimension and not knowing What Else Is Up is also pretty cool. (but man. i LOVE tyria)

i DO like commander/wayfinder back in the role of sidekick/attack dog. i loved it with trahearne and i love it with peitha.

frustrated huff. im pretty satisfied with this expansion so far but also im not used to settling for 'pretty satisfied' when it comes to gw2, personally. i know they can't continue the way they used to, with long expansions and content-filled living world eps. but even if the living world ep was small, they usually still managed to pack a LOT of stakes into them!! i really hope they round the story off well, but with there being another expansion in the works already... hhhh...

i really wish we spent more time discussing and exploring the fractals introduced in the beginning of the expansion.

actually, i think what i really miss is taimi (or anyone) sending us on our way to collect every bit of data possible in every corner of a new map, with fun dialogue to accompany it.

i miss the characters we got to know in the first bit of the expansion. man first i dont get to see the guild, then i dont get to see zojja, now ive only goth Peitha and Galrath. i love you Peitha and Galrath 💕. but where's our buddies :( yeah i know they explained. but. hrmrmff.

like idk i was really expecting we'd get to spend more time with zojja at least, even when memory wiped. you're telling me being stuck with your old friend/coworker in a mysterious demon dream dimension while your old friend/coworker remembers nothing about the bond you two had except that you two had it at all doesnt sound like grounds for amazing dialogue?? cmon!!!!!!

i think thats all for now ! thanku for reading my wall of text (i didnt mean to dwell on negatives sm bc theres still quite a lot i really like!! but i just. know what gw2 can be at its best. and if gw2's best can't happen anymore then im still really happy ive got the best to replay whenever i want)

[sugar-omi]

BIG FAT ORANGE CAT. I LOVE IT HERE. YOUR CAT IS MINE NOW RUNS AWAY WITH MY TIDDIES OUT

DUUUUUDE. i would've crashed out so bad omfg the sibling interrupting trope is SO GUT WRENCHING. (and can probably relate to olba. somehow.)

BUT LIKE YEAH NO IT GOT HOT. LIKE WE WERE MAKING OUT FOR A GOOD LIKE FIFTEEN MINUTES. HIS TONGUE AND FINGERS WRE IN MY MOUTH ON SEVERAL OCCASIONS. MY SHIRT ALMOST CAME OFF. I STILL HAVE HICKIES.

and GOD. the way he was fucking whining and panting into my mouth the whole time?? the way he made it impossible to arch with how heavily he was pressing against me??? the way he pulled away at the end of it breathless and whimpering, begging me to "stop feeling so good against [him] before [he stopped] being able to hold back"???? i had to take the bus home because if i let him drive me back to the dorms i would NOT have gotten back before midnight.

we agreed not to put a label on it yet, that we'd keep things light until we figured out what we both felt and what we both wanted without jumping into anything too early...BUT THE TEXT I GOT THIS MORNING. "but i wouldn't mind if we did. that. again"

HHHOOOOOOLY SHIT. OMI THIS CANNOT BE REAL.

i am now making it my mission to seduce this man into being all mine. i'm committed now.

STOPP NOOO HE DIDNT SAY THAT!!! NO WAY!!!!! usually im not crazy over the "i cant hold back" line but im so obsessed rn.... he's literally whipped. obsessed. a ximi lover. XIMI KISSER!!! HES LOCKED IN!!!!!

ALSO FINGERS ARE CRAZY. THATS. OH MAN THAT IS 🥵🥵🥵 AAAAA ALSO YESS HICKEYS ARE SO CRAZY. I LOVE IT.

AND PRESSING SO HARD AGAONST YOU YOU CANT EVEN MOVE BACK INTO HIM.... OHHH THATS SO COVE CODED. IM WRITING THAT DOWN RIGHT NOW

N THE WHIMPERING. PLEASE. THATS SO CUTE???? I need that so bad. oh my god. I cannot go on....

arghhh you would've had to pry my cold dead body off of him what the FUCK. I LOVE THIS!!! YAYYY!!!!

slow is good. slow is super good. definitely communicate what you want, like if you're a long-term girlie or if he's a long-term girlie but the other isnt/hasn't said that, jus go like "i wanna see how long this lasts bc this relationship feels really good so far"

(must say. idk whats in yalls head, so im jus talking to you like i would any of my friends okie<3333)

or even if ya don't know if you're a long-term type! or whatever!!! I think saying you wanna see how far this goes bc you're having a good time already, is good. it's like. no pressure yk. just wanna explore how deep the water is and enjoy it, and wherever it goes, you're happy with it

n ofc say if you'd like it to be a bf/gf thing. like "I'd like to be committed but rn I'm happy to see where it goes bc I rlly like you (and i wanna get there if possible)"

BUT YESS I SO AGREE WITH YOU ABOUT SEDUCING HIM. LOCK HIM UP!! PUT A RING ON IT!!!!!!

I told u I would immediately be planning our wedding, I can't so slow i am locked in IMMMMEDIATELY!!!

BUT DOMT BE CRAZY LIKE ME LMAOOO JUST HAVE FUN!!! GO ON DATES N STUFF!!!!! omg yknow what. fill out those like, friendship questionnaires. and those partner ones. like it may have things u might not have thought to know abt each other

like some things jus come naturally, but I think a quick way is cute, and sometimes stupid, and mundane dates, and questions like you're back in middle school

eeekk I can't believe we've made this much progress in jus a few DAYSSS IM SO OBSESSED 😫 u must tell me how things go.... my dms are wideeeee open 🥹💞

[seoulmatez]

Hi Sua 😻 hope u had a gr8 day/ night today!

Just wanna pop this idea here and lowkey (highkey) was inspired by my own misery / tom foolery yesterday 😭

Although both FH! Boothill and Reader are over the age for HS prom, Boothill seems like the type to take the reader out for a dance when he learns that she either:

A. Got rejected

B. Didnt get asked

Or C. The guy she was getting close with ended up breaking it off and a few months after it, he asked another girl out to prom 🫡 (heavily inspired by what I went thru yesterday)

Reader doesnt show it in her face but she was totally devistated by it even if it was years ago, but brushes it off when anyone and ESPECIALLY Boothill asks.

Boothill taking her out at night and told her to wear her best dress. Reader complying and very confused as to why hes wearing a semi formal outfit (could be a suit!) And having no idea where they are going.

The destination in my mind, could be either the hill or some fancy bar quite far from town.

If it's the hill, he totally sets up a speaker and ambiance for the dance all by himself and asks the reader for a dance 😭😭😭

Then we'd know that he did this because of our failed HS prom night. ID MELT RIGHT THEN AND THERE TBHHH 🫡❤️❤️❤️

Anyways! This was just a food for thought, Ive already gotten over that whole thing yesterday and I can just laugh it off. Glad I could turn that into some form of HS / scenario for our Farmhand Boothill xx

Sorry if this seem quite messy I was just pouring my ideas out 😭

Much love!

- kichi 🤍

hello kichi! omg i am so sorry that happened to u! idk if u ended up or are still planning on going but either way i hope it is (or was) still a fun experience for u bc u definitely deserve it 🫶🏽 but! this is very much something he would do! he definitely doesn’t come off as the sentimental type but i think boothill is actually one who holds onto memories and after hearing about this unfavorable one, he’s jumping at the opportunity to give reader a redo. he’s totally going out of his way to make sure that, even if it’s late, reader still has a good memory to look back on when she thinks of prom! and reader would be so touched that he took the time to do that for her 🥺

[replicasoul]

1, 2, 8, 9, 13, 14, 18, 19!!! :3333 wuf. wuf

pale trying to kill me as per usual ok lemme see

1. who was the first alter? who was the most recently formed? im not sure how much we like.. Work, like that? like for a huge portion of our life we didnt realize that a LOT of us were switching around really Really often without realizing it. we have definitely Noticed some ppl more recently than others, but that doesnt mean they werent already there and doing things but just hadnt realized 'oh im a different person than [x]' if we're talking earliest that we can remember? probably Carina or X0. latest would probably be Fetch 2. what do you all have in common? is there something you like to do together? a good chunk of us all like to write, which helps when thats also an activity we end up doing together a lot. we all have our preferences for characters, settings, etc. but its usually something thats more fun Together than separate 8. are there certain alters who excel at certain things? who, and at what? althea is rly good (as in Not As Terrible as anyone else whos tried) at Hollow Knight and nobody knows why; usually we're terrible at 2D stuff. TV tends to be good at planning out creative projects as well as like, doing repetitive tasks (like at work and such). im (X0) pretty decent at keeping up w/ more involved conversations w/ strangers/coworkers/acquaintances/etc. carina is usually super polite in convos so is usually better at talking to like... older folks or ppl in public who are upset about something; its also pretty good at analyzing things idk, i could go on but thats plenty 9. do you have any awkward stories about cofronting? ooh,,, share cofronting is Always weird with conversations, bc the way we talk can switch just, constantly as different ppl are talking. its not usually noticeable over text if ppl dont know us, but it can make things Awkward in person, especially if we're too exhausted to keep up appearances at that time 13. what makes each alter laugh? tbh i feel like this and some of the other questions require a better awareness of which of us is fronting (at any given time) than we actually have. like i Know theres Differences, i know its easier to get a laugh out of me than it is with Althea, for instance. but as far as knowing what Content does it for which system member? idfk 14. storytime! share your favorite memories of the system see this kinda stuff is mostly like. Private. but uh. trying to figure out althea's potential fursona species was a Time (its still kinda up in the air but it landing on shiba inu was VERY unexpected) us singing along to Classic J Dies And Goes To Hell Part 1 in the care w/ seth is one that comes to mind rn and i think just. Writing Together makes up a big portion of the best experiences we have together 18. what shows do you watch? are there any that you all love? what about some you hate? oh god too many. when youre collectively laid the fuck up bc of nerve pain and All you can do like 60% of the time is watch shows n movies, we end up doin that way Way more often than we'd like. i know Beef and Scavengers Reign have been recent favs for us. Carina's been watchin the new pokemon show (its ok), and i think Althea + TV were the ones who watched Severance first?? idr tho we dont tend to differentiate System Member-Specific Activities a lot of the time, we just kinda do w/e with whoever happens to be fronting there are definitely exceptions but its usually like. Games, or writing. like Althea playing hollow knight. someone else was also doing Killer7 but i forget who 19. is there anything or anyone you all share equal distaste for? salt + vinegar potato chips?? i dont know, im sure theres Plenty of things we dislike if youre counting like... All Things That Exist

[my-lunaberg]

I got sick and didnt feel like watching dsmp so I just watched a bunch of random movies I found on my german piracy site of choice for almost a week but now Im better and Im about to watch Eryns origin story and idk man, I just felt like sharing my thoughts about that guy so far

First of all, Im so curious about this concept of any dsmp character having an origin story bc its like. their origin story is that they showed up. thats it. Like yeah, a lot of people very obviously have histories going back to before they showed up on the smp but theyre never really elaborated upon. Niki and Wilbur would kill for eachother with no hesitation, no explaination needed, stuff like that

Also, Im curious about some of the demon lore we'll potentially get bc like, demons arent a thing in minecraft the way slimes or endermen are but Eryn said he is one and also actually confirmed that BBH is one as well (I think he did anyway, I know its been popular fanon for a while but I dont remember it being brought up in canon before he said it), so Im curious how theyre gonna be integrated. My prediction is that theyre basically just gonna be like, the nether-equivalent of humans. Like, in the overworld the humans (or player characters ig) are the only sapient creatures and in the nether its demons.

But thats general lore stuff, now I wanna talk about my guy Eryn !!!! :D

I like him so much and idek why. Hes just a fun guy a fun lil guy I love him :D

I guess the best way to describe it would be like, Im very charmed by him. I love that hes like, this edgy-lookin ninja guy who likes to cause trouble, hes really the chaotic teenage boy this server has been missing ever since every other teenage boy has either been horrifically traumatized or is Purpled. I also like that, despite him being this chaotic teen boy who does what he wants, he seems to very sincerely admire Eret and listens to them for some reason ?? I say 'for some reason' because Eret has kinda been old news for a long time, like the fact that theyre a king doesnt mean anything because actual governments just kinda stopped mattering to everyone except for Wilbur and Quackity, but that honestly just makes it more charming. Eryn and Erets entire dynamic is just so good idk why, but its so comfy and chill in a way where you can tell theyre still just aquaintances but its still so nice yknow. This kinda ties into my previous point as well, I really like how he put a shit ton of effort into getting good knight armor and honestly really wants to be a knight while also demonstrating that hes willing and able to like, steal shit from the prison

Another thing that I find really interesting is his complete and utter lack of connection or interaction with Dream. Like, he arrived after Dream had long been in prison and while he left an undeniable impact on literally everything in the server, no one really. talked about it? Eryn seemingly had to go out of his way to get any kind of information because when Dream was still locked up everyone was all like "welp, the big badscary villain man is gone, and we're all safe so we dont have to worry about him anymore and we'd rather not talk or think about him lest we spoil everyones good mood" and then when he escaped they were all like "oh no, we're already feeling so anxious and bad bc we dont know where he is so we'd rather not talk about him lest we make everyone feel even worse when everything is already so terrible". His mindset is that Dream hasnt harmed him personally and hes never really interacted with him so he doesnt really have an opinion on him, which is very interesting as well. On one hand, it seems a bit naive to think that way when literally everyone keeps telling him how horrible that guy is, but also, while none of the conflicts on the dream smp have ever been caused by mob mentality, they have certainly been exercabated by it, so i guess its better to have less of it

I do have mixed feelings about that though. I feel like I'd need to see Eryn interact with Dream in order to really form an opinion on that and I feel like they might actually do that. Like, Eryn is Tommys friend and I think if Dream somehow found out that he doesnt have any negative feelings towards him on the basis of "he hasnt harmed me personally", he would definitely try to exploit that and I think that could be really interesting. If that doesnt happen in canon I might write an AU about it, probably not straight up villain!Eryn but maybe leaning more towards chaotic neutral idk

[nyashykyunnie]

Let's do my Woowoo<33

1. I love him so much its an obsession atp. I can't function a single day not brainrotting about him and when I'm depressed I think of him to feel happy. He's also my muse, the muse that I hate to draw most of the time because I get lost in his eyes and fall in love all over again.

2. He has a scar on his left arm. My dominant hand is left hand so<333. I can be his left hand/j

3. How we're not given more insight to his mental decline from a goody two-shoes to cold-blooded and calculated. I understand why it happened but I wish we were given more insight to it. Like How Kaneki Ken's mental decline was shown so beautifully and the representation of his decline is because of his mother and hallucinations of Rize. The field of white spider lilies turning crimson red is such a beautiful allegory that he has embraced the psychotic side of him.

4. Hmmm,,, Wuthering Waves xDD??? I think it's interesting to have Jinwoo there since idk, it just fits his vibes? Post-apocalyptic world with muted colors augh.,,,,, That is so my man.

5. Fatal Trouble by Enhypen:

Fatal Trouble

It's getting blurry

Your memory

It's falling apart

Fatal Trouble

My Heart

Long-held Trust

They're Coming Undone

I don't know you

I'm falling apart

I'm lost

Fatal Trouble

Same Memory

Different story

Everytime I listen to this song I just realize "Damn, I fell for a man who lost himself but in the same time didnt". For me, Fatal Trouble is like Jinwoo xD. In a way that he changed so much it's overwhelming but in the same time you realize he's still him. So whenever I listen to Fatal trouble I just fall in love all over again.

6. Something in common? I guess self-hatred xDD. I hate myself a lot and I feel so inferior. My favourite line from Jinwoo was when he said "I longed to reach for the highest peak". When I read that I knew I was doomed to fall in love with him and him only for life.

7. We all like bullying him and calling him a petty brat xDD!!!

9. No? Yes? I mean, I'm a girl, he's a boy. I'm pretty sure that's not allowed. But if I do become roommates with him I'll avoid him like a plague and memorize his footsteps so that I know when to come out. Not that I hate him, of course not, it's just ya gurl has severe anxiety issues and interacting with people is generally a hard thing for me to do.

10. Yeah. No. I'm the weird kid, the ugly nerd who dresses awfully. The nerd that isn't smart and has her head high up in the clouds, always daydreaming. I love art, he doesn't. My interests for games are unhealthy and I play to be comforted. Jinwoo plays games to be practical and be god gaymer. I'm just there. Would I even talk to him? No. We'd just pass by each other.

11. Date? Hah? Who me??? Yeah, bloody hell no. I can't even be friends with him. And generally, I don't think I'm loveable to a romantic level. Honestly, I'm scared of falling in love. I never had a proper relationship before. I overthink, I read every little thing, I get anxious and have panic attacks when I think I've done something wrong. I've never had a boyfriend. I don't know how real life romance works. I'm generally avoidant of touch too, I don't like skin contact. I don't know. It's just eushdje. I think I'm scared of hurting someone when I touch them. Relationships are supposed to make you happy, no? Yeah, I don't think I'll be happy because my mindset is unhealthy. "Oh, you like me? Let's see how far you really want to go. See? I'm right." And then secretly wish they proved me wrong. I just ejsheje. I don't trust anyone with my heart and I don't think I'm fit to be anyone's lover, let alone Jinwoo. I know he'd take care of me, but my anxieties are too strong. I love him so much, but I'm not worth it to be with someone like him. I'd rather he be happy with someone like Hae-in, because I'm pathetic xDD

12. Scars. Riddled with scars. I would trace them every single day.

13. 👍 He's a dry texter for sure and mostly only talk to his sister to like confirm if she's okay, needs anything or to tell her he'll be home late.

14. Dark Academia. I know he probably should be in mafia aesthetic but hear me out,,,, Jinwoo in browns hehehdvdbdhdv.

15 to 20 no opinions:3.

21. I like showing the reader Jinwoo's mental struggles. I want to show Jinwoo as vulnerable to everyone, that he isnt always the strongest and smartest. He has imperfections but oh sweethearts, just know he will love you sincerely. I want my readers to feel loved. I want to make people feel happy through Jinwoo because he gives me so much happiness.

22. I like it when other authors make Jinwoo so human and makes me giggles and kick. I hate it when they make Jinwoo too ooc.

23.

Do I need to explain?

24. DOCTOR ZAYNE. LIKE DO I NEED TO SAY SOMETHING ELSE??? THEY LIT HAVE THE SAME AESTHETICS AND BEHAVIOURS PLS. IT'S A COINCIDENCE I HAPPEN TO LOVE BOTH I SWEAR. I LIKED ZAYNE BECAUSE HE WAS THE FIRST MAN I SAW IN LND THE REST IS PURELY COINCIDENTAL I SWEAR.

25. "Ohhh, tall and handsome aye bet let's see" - 2019/20

It's 2024 now and I still cant move on. I love him so much it's like I'm walking in inferno but I wouldn't stop walking. I can't hold his hand. Even if I could, I would never. I love that man but he is not for me. He's my muse, my star boy, the moon in the vast darkness and I am the sea that never ceases to yearn for him but would never dare to hold him.

CHARACTER ASK GAME!!! 💫

Send a character + one or more of these question IN THE INBOX. Don't reply on the post!

1. Why do you like or dislike this character?

2. Favorite canon thing about this character?

3. Least favorite canon thing about this character?

4. If you could put this character in any other media, be it a book, a movie, anything, what would you put them in?

5. What's the first song that comes to mind when you think about them?

6. What's something you have in common with this character?

7. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you like?

8. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you despise?

9. Could you be roommates with this character?

10. Could you be best friends with this character?

11. Would you date this character?

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?

13. What's an emoji, an emoticon and/or any symbol that reminds you of this character or you think the character would use a lot?

14. Assign a fashion aesthetic to this character.

15. What's your favorite ship for this character? (Doesn't matter if it's canon or not.)

16. What's your least favorite ship for this character?

17. What's a ship for this character you don't hate but it's not your favorite that you're fine with?

18. How about a relationship they have in canon with another character that you admire?

19. How about a relationship they have in canon that you don't like?

20. Which other character is the ideal best friend for this character, the amount of screentime they share doesn't matter?

21. If you're a fic writer and have written for this character, what's your favorite thing to do when you're writing for this character? What's something you don't like?

22. If you're a fic reader, what's something you like in fics when it comes to ths character? Something you don't like?

23. Favorite picture of this character?

24. What other character from another fandom of yours that reminds you of them?

25. What was your first impression of this character? How about now?

26. FREEBIE QUESTION!!

[castlebyersafterdark]

Especially as a gay guy who with no hesitation crushed on so many straight male celebs without an ounce of whatever the hell this girl's mindset was. They're never going to meet you, let alone propose marriage!!

wow that story about your friend was so interesting! i imagine such a formative part of growing up queer is these 'hopeless' crushes, so why does her (straight) scenario hinge on whether they could actually be together? its as though her fantasy hinged on a glimmer of possibility. on hope. hmmm.

i think when we play pretend, even as kids, there's this impossibly simultaneous belief of two opposite things: that its both real and not real. the key is that they are balanced and both true somehow - so i could daydream about billie joe armstrong from this one magazine poster pasted on my bedroom wall for years but i def knew i wouldnt and probs didnt even want to meet him! i mean, i was like 13 and he was an adult, which kids now are freaking out about, but i didnt think twice about crushing on him because i wasnt hoping to meet or actually marry him lol.

but i guess today with social media where we can glimpse these people's lives, our fantasies become more 'possible' and the real-not real balance gets thrown out of whack. honestly i think it either spoils the fantasy (oh no theyre human after all) or it makes people believe they could actually be friends with celebs (because theyre human! yay!)... and like, yeah, technically, but when i see people saying 'i just need to meet them and we'd be besties' it always makes me cringe, because parasocial relationships make people forget that relationships really really are two-sided. and your fav celeb might just not... like you that much. or they might just be a bit boring irl for more than the length of a tiktok video lol.

idk, i've worked in jobs where i've met a fair share of celebs i admire from many different fields, and its amazing, the difference between idea of them and the presence they have in person. after that i decided i didnt like to meet my heroes because the imbalance felt so weird to me.

so maybe your friend knowing this guy was gay, it ruined her balance of real-not real make believe. whereas i assume you, knowing you were having gay crushes on straight dudes from a young age (</3), probably had this self awareness and so your fantasies hinged on something other than possibility. did you also like any celebs who were rumoured about, like prince or bowie? as i recall there was some ambiguous sexuality in the 00s alt scene, but who knows how much was for show? (mcr springs to mind)

Yeah, I definitely think it's very common across the board for a lot of people that once something interferes with their fantasy, it just breaks them a little. Which I always just find so odd because celebrity crushes are so far from reality so why does it matter so much?? Absolutely different if it's someone you know irl, you're into them, and then you either find out they have a SO, they're not sexually compatible, or they just... don't want you haha. Add a very thick layer of 'they'll never want you' to celebrities because while yes, famous people do get with non famous people, you crushing on someone famous as you go about your day to day normal life is a lot different than a random encounter that is so rare it's not even worth mentioning as logic to this situation. People get upset when they find out the celeb they like is dating someone. Or they come out. Or whatever. The make-believe really warps some people. (This could be a whole discussion on the rabid Mlvn fan issue, as a meltdown on the verge due to their ship sinking and their ideal fantasy world centered on Mike/El crumbling down, breaking their brains)

For example, I've made it pretty clear I have a big gay embarrassing crush on Finn. What does it matter though haha I will never meet that man. Don't want to, and I'm also very happy and smitten and secure in my personal life. It's just normal human attraction. Talent and being hot is appealing. I'm just a random fan. Same as everyone else! I could talk for hours about the parasocial epidemic but you said enough so I'll let that one sit. Also, I don't think I'd like him less if it turns out he's straight. Still follow his career. Still think he's fine as hell. I'll just probably like him more if he's on this side. That's my honest take.

And totally sad for kids that their peers and people older than them are promoting this thought-crime culture that it's weird or wrong to fantasize about other people, especially those older. That's just life!! It doesn't mean anything. It's admiration, it's aspirational, it's learning about yourself.

And to your last point, I can't remember all my crushes when I was young, mostly actors in shows or movies rather than musicians. Bowie and Prince would have been too old for me to even give a second thought about haha but I'm sure they were so validating for people a little further back, unless this just meant like them. I mean there were celebs that were out or who were rumored of course, but the biggest one I can think of was Lee Pace, esp during the height of the Hobbit filming. I was really into those movies in high school. He had rumors, which turned out to be true! So, there's an example that worked out actually.

This is kinda embarrassing now but my dream man growing up was Shaun White. Memory lane stuff right there, goddddd 🫣🤣

[mttyswhre]

My Roman Empire will always be how whenever I get excited for something, it falls through. Dude, we had this whole thing planned out and we both fucked it up. My mom and I were going to rent a car for Christmas so we can drive it far away to my aunt's house because our cars suck. I waited for too long because I wasn't even sure if I was going to have to work or not. #sad #rant

She called this morning and got the $500 cleared and everything. I thought they'd only put $400 hold and then we pay for the reservation after like because they'd make sure that the car was okay and I don't have to pay more?? So I did the $500 to give us buffer room. but no, they needed the price of the rental car and the $400 deposit.

We were there at 11:40 and they closed at 12. I told mom to do the pick up at 10:00 in case we ran in to any problems and ofc she didn't. If we had the two hours we would've been able to deposit more money and then split the payment between a debit card and a credit card. I didn't have my debit card on me but I had the money in my account but the money was meant for tmobile that they didnt take out yet. so I could've used the money I had for my phone bill but I didn't have my debit card on me. So theres another loss.. Another loss is that if we had more time to go deposit cash from our emergency funds(cash at home) to make a payment we could've done that and split the payment.

Not doing enough research about how much money would be taken out

Waiting too long to make my payment bc idk what the plan was

Waiting too long to make the reservation

Not paying enough money on the credit card

Not doing enough research over all

We showed up too late to pick up the car, we would've had more time to make deposits or move money around

I should've had my debit cards and cash on me

I went in to it knowing we'd be turned down, my mindset was wrong

I should've turned back and got my debit card. I should've gone back and got my debit card.

I didn't ask if they take apple pay, I could've used my phone bill $

It's just very interesting to me, even down to the last detail of having the $270 but it being memo'ed out for my phone bill. Robbing Peter to pay Paul type of thing. I'm angry, I'm so angry at myself and I just want to turn it around and push it on my family. I just want them to help me so bad but they owe me nothing. They have no reason to help me. But I just want it.

Me and my mom are two grown women, we know when Christmas is, we knew what the plan wanted to be. Why did I wait so long to make the payment? Why didn't I save up more money? There's no excuse, it's our fault. My mom and I aren't a team, we didn't talk about this rental or do any of it together or talked about it. It was all so fucked up.

We had the money we just didn't pay the credit card bill enough. Then like I had the money in my checking account but I couldn't just pay the bill because it wouldn't have cleared right away anyway. Whatever, I could sit literally sit here a talk about it all day. I could literally sit here and write about this all day. Every minute detail and what we did and how I yelled at my mom. like... i am going to be thinking about it all day. I hope not. Me writing this all out will help me forget about it and please god please can we be busy at work. please. I need to work and keep busy.

God, I really did want to see my family but now that this didn't work out and I know they don't want to help us anyway I just want Christmas to be over. Like, it's a reminder or how much my family doesn't actually care about me. If I had a nuclear family they would care about me, my mom cares about me very much and if I had a sister she'd be on my side and my dad if I had one... but cousins and aunts are different. And they're so lucky, they have multiple kids and multiple incomes and money is so easy for them. If I had money I wouldn't be reminded of these pathetic moments where I have nobody to help me. No safety net, nothing to fall back on. I don't even need money per say, I could use like a ride or like to borrow a car (ID PAY OBVIOUSLY) but I don't have strong relationships with people. I'd never let anyone borrow my car. I'd let my mom lol.

I wish my cousin would offer to meet us half way. I wish my aunt would offer to do something. I just would love to feel cared about yk. One time when I needed to get my car fixed my ex gave me $300 ad I remember sobbing because nobody has ever helped me like that before.

I'm not close with people, I don't let them in, I'm scared of them and it turns in to jealousy and hatred. My friends are like gold, they offer me endless security and love and light but they're not millionaires lmao. They're not established adults. and it's funny because Lauren is an established adult but I don't think she'd spit down my throat if my ass was on fire ykwim lmaooooooo I'm so serious. But literally all my other friends are financially where I'm at and I know for a fact that if they had it like that they'd share it like that. I do really believe that.

It's so hard to not have that rock hard solid safety net of a family. I would love to sit here and be like oh it's because my mom missed work because she was sick and we got behind on money. Okay we got $1500 from my mom's """"benefit""" that went towards bills and Christmas and we have most of it still saved. But that wouldn't have helped me today with the rental car situation because we didn't have time to make any depsoits or move money. ( I should've had my dbc on me and used my phone bill money)

I pay my bills, my bills are paid. I am not behind on one bill. I am able to pay my bills without going in to debt and I have more than $800 in cash at my house saved for an emergency. I'm doing fine.

This fucking rental car thing is just so fucking triggering dude. It makes me feel poor, it makes me feel like I have nothing, I am good for nothing, I can't accomplish one fucking thing. I AM REEEEEEELING BRO. I AM GEEKED. I AM SO MAD. I AM LIKE SO ANGRY. I CRY AS I WRITE THIS. god fuck, how stupid can I be? I had one job... I had one fucking job, dude. This is like making me feel like I can't accomplish anything, therefore I am worthless, therefore nobody has any reason to fucking love me or care about me or even like, look at me.

Why would I risk my mom's car to hang out with people who don't care if I'm there or not tho yk DO YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN

If it was up to me I would just stay home. Final answer. Stay home. I did not give renting a car my best shot BUT I did try, I gave it a good ole college try. For whatever reason I fumbled the ball and it wasn't meant to be. As I write this, i still don't know what we're going to do, the only reason we'll end up still going is because I don't want my mom to be extra sad because of nana. So I'll get to go sit on my cousin's couch on my phone in silence until it gets dark enough for us to finally leave.

Now that this happened and I'm reminded of how much they don't actually care if we're there or not- I'm over it. Skip to December 26th and keep it pushing so I can spend New Years at home, too. I have a small family (me and one other person) lmaoooo. Stop idc at least I love her with all my heart. It's moments like this I'm reminded I need to financially get my shit together for when I'm ACTUALLY on my own. Life is so weird and I'm so privileged I don't have to put myself in uncomfortable situations just to survive. I'm lucky I'm able to go and make money for myself and my family. Life day to day is so tolerable. This world is wicked and there's no time for rest.

My life in particular is so lonely because I refuse to let anyone in. That's a topic for another day.

What triggered me the most today was feeling abandoned by my family and like they don't care about me. It hurts because I know no one will even offer to like meet us halfway or something and pick us up. And my mom's mom just died!!! Like brooooo if not for me, then for her. Oh god, we're going to have to go. Fuck my life. Ew, I don't want to go, I am so fucking angry with those people. I hate them and they're little privileged set up. A fucking five income household, brody. Imagine living like that. Okay seven people in a house is literally my own personal hell but at least I'd have enough extra cash to save up for my own place ok!!!! DAMN even if they needed a ride home from the mechanic it would be so easy to get a ride. DAMN imagine having people at your disposal like that. damn. I'm jealous, I'm hateful. I want to, like... not go. I don't want to go now. I don't want to see them I am so angry brooooo.

Idk if the noise, yelling, drama, gossip, opinions, prying eyes, judgement and side-picking is worth the stability. BUT IT"S NOT LIKE I ACTUALLY HAVE PEACE OF MIND NOW!!! Everyone has a struggle. Everyone has a struggle. Trust your struggle, Ash. Learn to let people in and not be so jealous and hateful, you fucking hater lmao. who are you to talk you can't even rent a car

I'm thankful I have my mom. I'm thankful I have good friends I will text on Christmas, friends I can always emotionally rely on.

[talictries]

friendship vent (agane LMAO)

i didnt say this before because i was too embarrassed LMAO but a little over 2 weeks ago i ruined my best friend of 5 year's 21st birthday by getting way too drunk, breaking up the whole event, and having a ambulance called on me LMAO. i am ok (obvi) but I've always been the one who's leeched off her for emotional support shit (because i have no friends except her lol) and we've had these similar arguments in the past but because it was supposed to be her big day, and it was in front of all her friends from uni and shit, and her family (which had to deal with me and house me for that night) none have ever been this bad.

because my mental health is so shit, she often worries if I've like kms-ed even tho i wouldn't do that. but i gave her space for 2 weeks and finally messaged her today being like yo hope you're well all that shit. she messaged back (a good sign) and we talked for a tiny but but she was like I'm still mad at u abt the party thing but I'm also worried about your mental health.'

and like, sure, i could have just said 'dw I'm all good' and moved on, but in the past 3 years where I've lost all my other friends and family (no one died dw, just stopped talking to friends and family moved far away) I've always kinda leaned on her the most. and over the past few months when my mental health was at its lowest, i could tell she was starting to get anxious just by my mere existence (thinking i was dead or smth) and its been weighing on my mind that she doesn't really need that shit in her life, because her life comparatively is a fuck ton more stressful atm.

so basically i info dumped (not a slay) and was like look i was giving u space, but I've been thinking about our friendship which i am the one who always messes up, and ik we've had a few conversations abt it before but i just wanted to state my piece. already from my side this has been a slightly unhealthy relationship because i know i am far too dependant on you, and i don't want this turning into a more unhealthy friendship because before that was a v internal me thing whereas now its actually impacting your life. so i love our friendships and its happy moments but i want you to really evaluate your life and make the final decision as to if you want me in it or not. maybe not for a few weeks, or moths, or ever, but i feel guilty that YOU feel guilty about it.

and ik it isn't my place to dictate her feelings or whatever but now i fear if i just kept my mouth shut we'd be on the path to getting back to normal. but at the same time, if i didn't say this then i feel like I'm mental-health-trapping her because she thinks if she leaves me ill kms??? like baby trapping but not really. anyway idk. she said 'this is a lot, i need time' which is totally fair and i will give it to her, but honestly now i feel I've been TOO real and she'll be like 'yeah i actually don't need talic in my life' and that may send me spiralling because i have zero support systems (apart from ao3 LMAO) without her.

oh well. if it works out it will, if it doesn't then its better for both of us in the long-run ig. just sad I've ruined another 5 year long friendship because of my alcoholic clingy stupid mental-health-issue-ridden ass.

lol

im ok dw. i truly want what's best for her and if its a life without me then i accept it. i will not be selfish and take more from her like i have. besides having zero friends will legit make me go out and make more because i die without social interaction (i say not showing up to uni for the third day week in a row because I'm lowkey agoraphobic and high-key depressed)

slay. perhaps i will write the most gut-churning sad angst to cope

[m00nsickness]

doing thiz bcz. why not lolz

1) comfort characterz uhh? idk? rammie maybe? like. jschlattz ram perzona???

2) lighter definitely

3) no i do not, my windowz don't even open in the firzt place... that or i do not know how

4) umm? i dunno that many cryptidz sorry

5) mine r blue, but the bodyz r brown!

6) bcz i have no impulze control or senze of right and wrong

7) i have short hair... :sighz:

8) none! i don't drink water uzually :P

9) cold coffee definitely hot coffee iz NASTY :[

10) thatz clazzified O-O

11) i dunno

12) an interezting day, thatz for sure lolz

13) umm?? earlier but it waz juzt a cookie?? (doez that count)

14) i cant remember what that smell iz so

15) to uhh... a cat? im not with her atm but her name iz big kitty and she iz in a conztant cycle between balding and growing her hair back

16) no lol the body iz 14

17) i dunno... sight bad either way

18) uzually none unlezz u count shampoo (and WAY too much conditioner), but i think i have some sort of gel or somethin i uze sometimez??

19) yez! but i am painting them black... black nail polish beloved <33

20) soda bcz the body iz. american and itz what we're uzed to (i am british in source and headzpace tho :33)

21) we have like thiz,, baby blanket rattle thing? thatz alzo a stuffed animal? we luv him sm... they r genderfluid ig bcz weve been uzing random azz pronounz for her since we were little

22) a bad perzon apparently /cj

23) i dont like being cold :[

24) now how did we get up there. alzo probably juzt talking n joking around :D

25) perfume i HATE lotion

26) i do not know what thiz meanz /lh

27) umm? well i went to sleep at 3am... and woke up like 12pm?? fuck im bad at math umm 7?

28) normally yez but we can't find ourz rn... and we pull it down to eat/drink and forget to put it back up pretty often... we try tho!

29) hottezt pozzible setting no joke

30) no dishez! im pretty good at putting dishez in the sink (but NOT at doing them lol)

31) i am not sure! i like a lot of typez of muzic, anything i like uzually doez the trick

32) not atm, we juzt have two purple onez that r pretty much the same! but at home, the black onez, bcz the catz have left thoze onez alone the mozt

33) yezterday i went and looked at a bunch of civil war landmarkz? doez that count? i uhh. didnt really underztand mozt of it tho. i dunno all thoze big war wordz

34) there are a couple! probably im gonna kill santa clauz by danny gonazlez? or almozt any american idiot song... grew up on that album :]

35) idk which timezone i am but az i am writing thiz anzwer it iz 10:56pm

36) i dont think at all! moonsickness is our sys name, so we'd like to hopefully keep the url

37) umm! my co-hozt cam, we r from the same timeline/mems/source and have known each other pretty much since i waz born/lh

38) umm? japanese cherry blozzom... probably

39) if u mean chapztick, then yeah! we have tonz, but our favouritez r the coke product flavoured onez we bought... <33

40) yez! like two lollipopz and a chocolate cookie :P

41) idfk, juzt with lotz of chocolate

42) webzite, not an app, but quotev! we bazically live there lol... and itz where we met our two bezt friendz!

43) i dont like spicy foodz unlezz they r VERY VERY mild

44) oh damn uhh! our momz bf... he cauzed uz and our family a lot of trauma

45) not very well but kinda??

46) rudolph the red nozed reindeer (the claymation one), or the grinch (the cartoon one), or the nightmare before chriztmaz [azzuming u mean winter holidayz]

47) telling our friendz that we luv them too <33 /p

48) when we were 13 i think? or 12? either champagne or wine, idk which came firzt... either way they were both NAZTY (azk to tag idk if underage drinking botherz any of yall)

49) i dunno actually, havent tried

50) i don't see why not! :3

YAYY THAT ONLY TOOK FOREVER! alzo if i seemed unzure about my anzwerz itz bcz i waz lol

(i accidentally left thiz in my draftz, az far az the timezone thing goez itz 12:18am rn)

here’s weirder asks

who is/are your comfort character(s)?

lighter or matches?

do you leave the window open at night?

which cryptyd being do you believe in?

what color are your eyes?

why did you do that?

hair-ties or scrunchies?

how many water bottles are in your room right now?

which do you prefer, hot coffee or cold coffee?

would you slaughter the rich?

favorite extracurricular activity?

what kind of day is it?

when was the last time you ate?

do you love the smell of earth after it rains?

are you a parent? (all answers qualify)

can you drive?

are you farsighted or nearsighted?

what hair products do you use?

imagine we’re at a sleepover, would you paint my nails?

do you say soda or pop?

something you’ve kept since childhood?

what type of person are you?

how do you feel about chilly weather?

if we were together on a rooftop, what would we be doing?

perfume/body spray or lotion?

a scenario that you’ve replayed multiple times?

about how many hours of sleep did you get?

do you wear a mask?

how do you like your shower water?

is there dishes in your room?

what type of music keeps you grounded?

do you have a favorite towel?

the last adventure you’ve been on?

is there a song you know every word to by heart?

what’s your timezone?

how many times have you changed your url?

someone in your life, other than a relative, you’ve known for 10+ years?

a soap bar that smells good?

do you use lip balm?

did you have any snacks today?

how do you take your coffee?

an app you frequently use besides this godforsaken site?

what’s your take on spicy foods?

you get a free pass to kill anyone, who is it?

can you remember what happened yesterday?

favorite holiday film?

what was the last message you sent?

when did you first try an alcohol beverage?

can you skip rocks?

can i tag you in random stuff?

[harryhandstan]

HIIII happy (late) 4th of july!!

you are literally the sweet person to ever exist i can’t believe its been like 2 years since we last spoke. its crazy how time flies

oh noooo im sorry that happened to you :(( im glad ur doing better and taking good care of yourself 💓💓 wishing u a speedy recovery!

alsoooo good luck with house hunting! that must be so exciting!!looking for a new place to call home and making new memories in it! i just know youll find the most beautiful homey and perfect place!! im manifesting for u

im doing well!! not much happened except for school stuff but i just went to my first ever pit concert a few months ago! i saw the driver era (only because i thought ross lynch was hot lol) i didnt know what to expect for pit but i didn’t expect to stand for 8 hours straight 😭😭 AHHHH ALSO im seeing taylor swift in a few weeks and i literally cannot wait!!!!

im always thinking about u! talk to u soon!! good luck 🍀 love youuuuuuu!!! 💗💓💓💞💕

-🧸

happy late 4th of july to you too bestie!! I hope you had a great day!!

I'm sorry for the delay in answering this btw it's been storming here so my wi-fi has been in and out all day!

omg stop you're so kind to me I genuinely love talking to everyone and I consider you and many others here my friends so y'all make it easy to just repay the love I've been given!!

it's actually only been a year bub! I only know because I looked it up to refresh my memory about what we talked about before cause like I said a lot had happened and I couldn't remember if we'd talked since my accident. it was last year after my birthday and after harry's house came out. but really it's alright I don't want you to feel bad!

thank you so much for the well wishes ❤ I realized after that I left some detail out of what happened to me and didn't explain it very well, but if I ramble on too much just feel free to skip over it! basically not only was I kicked but I went flying about 8 feet across my yard too, which caused me to have a compression fracture on T11 of my spine. I also had a contusion on my right hip (which is just a really, really deep and bad bruise), which is where the point of impact was. I will (hopefully) continue to improve, but having arthritis still causes me to have a ton of pain if I do too much physical activity. that part of my spine is also partly collapsed and always will be, but my neurosurgeon said that as long as my arms and legs are still okay that I should just slowly start to get back to "normal" life and listen to my body as I go along! I asked if I needed to keep up with x-rays or anything over the years but he said my symptoms would get much, much worse if the collapse got any worse and I would know I need to come back to see him. he also said IF I would've had to have surgery that it would take like 12 pins and a huge rod to correct things so I'm so SO lucky that things weren't any worse!

thank you so much for helping us manifest!!! it means more than you'll ever know because it hasn't been easy so far trying to find a place 😔 we live in such a rural area in GA and we originally wanted to stay in the same town because I was supposed to start a new job in january and we wanted to be close to my work. I probably won't get to take that job now (which is a whole other long story), and since there are very limited options we're probably gonna have to broaden our search to surrounding towns that are slightly bigger! we ultimately want a house together, but I think we're gonna have to settle for an apartment for now until we can find the perfect place for us. anything would be better than here rn though!!!

idk if I've ever talked much about my dad to you but we have as no contact of a relationship as possible even though we live in the same house. he's the reason for my accident and so the day it happened and we were waiting for the ambulance to come my mom told him that we wouldn't be coming back to this house. but then we had no choice we didn't have the money or resources needed to go elsewhere. I was worried as I got better she would forget about that and slip out of that mindset, but thankfully she hasn't! she just told me tonight we'd probably go look at apartments next week and that she can't wait to get out of here. I could truly cry at the thought of having a safe, clean, and comfortable space away from him. it's what my mom, my siblings, and our dogs all deserve!

how is school going? how much longer do you have to go? and oohh I'm so happy you got to experience a concert in pit!! it's amazing but it is soooo exhausting I hope you got lots of rest afterward 😊 when I saw harry I wore my ankle support thing to my pit concert to because I knew my feet would be swollen the next day probably. and taylor swift that's so cool!! I'm very excited for you!! I hope you have the best time!!! where are your seats for that show?

I'm always thinking about you too!! seriously sometimes I'll just think about you or how you're doing so just know you're always getting any spare good vibes I have sent your way ✨ thank you thank you for the good luck!!! love you moreeeee 🤍

I was gonna tell you about getting to see stevie nicks and my road trip to see my little brother but I talked so much this time we'll save those stories for next time if you wanna hear about them!!

[pacifymebby]

Do u just bluntly ask for something casual/sex? I get toooo embarrased lol need to be more hoe :(

Idk its been so long since i was like this and i could NOT do it now because my personality flipped to the other extreme of super shy but from what I remember it didnt take much but like also, morally it was dubious you know? I know i broke at least two peoples hearts by going too far with people (not realising, in my defense!!!, how invested in "us" they were and then dropping them)

It wasnt so much a case of walking up to people and asking for casual sex though, it was more of a game you know, you follow the steps of flirting and letting them know what you want. With men it was v much a case of flirting, like saying a couple slutty things and then you were kinda just in there. There were some lads i was friends with and we'd get stoned and have a fwb type thing going on where we basically knew that we were gonna hang out, play video games and get stoned and probably fuck around all day too. Then there were others where i was fully just y/n in the groupie style, talking to a guy at a gig and making it very apparent that he could come home with me if he wanted. Like most men will be looking for that anyway so all u have to do is give them a signal that they can get that off you?

Girls its a bit trickier just cause its trickier to meet them, u cant know for sure that theyre even into you likr that ect, and also u have the unfortunate stereotype of like gay girls will want to marry u the second u kiss... Which is how i ended up accidentally breaking two hearts u know? Like that's harder but u follow the same principles as before.

Also mostly i used to tinder to meet all these people like, if they werent my friends or a lad i met at a gig, i was mostly matching on tinder, going for drinks and then having one night stands.

Like i never once was like "hey i want casual sex do you want casual sex," but mostly in todays society thats all people want anyway.

I think its harder to meet someone who actually wants to do the love and commitment thing tbh.

[the-mechanisms-system]

This seems fun but we dont have enough followers/engagement to actually get asks so! We will just. Answer them lol. (Hnder the cut because it got a little long... whoopsies

1) We do! Our system name (our url) was based on a hyperfixation we shared

2) Most of us chose our names from the existing namehoard we shared when we thought we were a singlet. One of us had to ask around for name suggestions because it didnt vibe with any of the ones we already had stored away

3) Nope!! We're all some form of trans and none of us are cool with the body's deadname. Surprisingly, none of us go by the name most people know us by either. We chose it when we first realized we were trans, but none of us go by that name individually, so it's kind of a collective name for all of us since nobody irl knows we're plural and that's the name they know us by.

4) Probably me lmao. I mean. Transmasc femboy named Elliott? Yeah.

5) Either Vindemiator, Glitch, or Roach. All kind of odd names.

6) T and I are pretty close to the body's age, C and S are older by at least 5 years, Riles is about 5?? Glitch and Vin dont really have ages, I think P is a little younger than the body's age, and I have no idea for R and Cr.

7) Yeah! Vin and Glitch don't really have ages since one is immortal and the other is an android.

8) Probably Vin. We dont know his age but hes probably super old, being immortal and all.

9) Not as far as we know!

10) Ours wants to be treated like a kid. They dont really have the emotional capacity for handling any sort of adult things/responsibilities.

11) We're all aroacespec, but some of us are oriented aroace and have more interest in romance. Mostly me. But we're all mlm/nblm if we're oriented aroace.

12) We're all either male or nb or both!

13) I do!! Also C uses one set of neos and Glitch uses it/its exclusively.

14) Yep! Collectively transmasc and aroace.

15) Yeah! None of us identify with the body's sex, so no matter who you ask, we're all some flavor of trans, so the body is too.

16) I'd say Glitch, since it's an android.

17) C and Vin might, I'm not sure. Neither of them have them all the time, but I think they might sometimes??

18) Nope

19) Glitch thinks fronting is weird because its made of metal and plastic and the body is. Not. I think the weirdest part is being unable to interact with nature as much as I want to since we're bodily disabled. S would probably say its being unable to use ~magic~ that they have in headspace (its literally just fancy fire they can make colorful fire in their hand.)

20) I think most of us could qualify as nonhuman in some way shape or form.

21) Nope! Weve only got 2 (maybe 3) and they're from different sources.

22) Mostly disconnected. Nobody has exomemories (except maybe Vin??), and their personalities are similar to source, and Vin and R go by the same names as their source, but their source isnt like. Them. They feel Some connection, but not Entirely.

23) None of them are very weird tbh, maybe R? Since his source is just a Weird piece of media /pos (The Passenger IF)

24) Yeah! Vin and T are in a relationship. T isnt an introject at all

25) Kind of? Vin is from an AU that was made by the creator of the media, so that's a little non canon, and then some of his memories are connected to daydreams weve had about that AU.

26) Nope! Fakeclaiming has a very negative effect on us since we doubt a lot anyway and we're nondisordered so we tend to stay Far away from it.

27) Also a no. When we thought we were a singlet we tried to make a created system, so we were already pro-endo then, since we'd have been pretty hypocritical if we werent.

28) Idk, I guess just that they're denying the personhood of a lot of people when they say endos aren't systems? I think anti endos that fakeclaim especially think that endos are just singlets, so when they fakeclaim the only person they're hurting is the "singlet" behind the account, but endo headmates are real and there and they're essentially telling those headmates that they arent real or they aren't people, which can really hurt.

29) We're all very solidly pro-endo. We're pretty sure we're at least partially traumagenic, but theres a fair chance that were partially endo too, and even if we arent, we're still 100% supportive of systems who are.

30) Harmful. Its not a fun debate and it's not something to "believe in" or not and it's not just an opinion-- what you're debating is the existence and personhood of real people (not directed at op or anyone specific.) We experience this type of debate over our existence and rights enough because we're trans, so we know how exhausting and painful it can be to hear other people treat your existence as a debate.

31) C!! Xe's really cool. I'm fond of everybody in the system but C is who I interact with most and he takes over sometimes when I'm in a stressful situation.

32) Also C. I mean c'mon, xe's a punk metalhead anarchist who puts absolutely no value on conformity and takes pride in being our various forms of Weird (trans, aroace, gay, disabled, plural, NPD, etc).

33) Vin and T. Nobody knows wtf that relationship is, including them lmao. It's not romantic but it's not platonic and maybe it's a QPR or maybe it's not??? It's v funny. Also we maybe have another fictive that's in some kind of situationship with C but we're not sure if hes actually part of the system or if hes a daydream C has sometimes when xe fronts???

34) I love it. My headmates are like a found family to me. Plus it's so much less lonely than when we thought we were a singlet, even though we have a really hard time talking to each other.

35) Painting!! I love painting and I'm really really good at it in headspace but I'm really terrible at it outside of headspace lmao. Also gardening! Comes with the territory of being whatever the fuck I am (elf?? Faerie?? Idk). And Mitski! Honestly most of my music actually. My music taste is a lot softer(??) than most of the others.

system ask game!

any systems of any origins may reblog this :]

name asks

1. do you have a collective name? how was it chosen?

2. how do new system members choose their names?

3. are there any system members who identify with the body’s name?

4. which system member has the most stereotypical name?

5. which system member has the weirdest name?

age asks

6. how does age work for your system’s members?

7. does your system have ageless system members?

8. who is the oldest system member? how old are they?

9. does your system have system members who age slide or age regress?

10. if you have them, do your system’s littles want to be treated like children or adults?

queer asks

11. do system members tend to have similar sexualities, or are they different for each member?

12. does your system have more male, female, or nonbinary system members? is there any overlap between those?

13. do any system member use xenogenders or neopronouns?

14. does your system collectively identify as anything? if so, what?

15. do you& consider the body to be transgender?

nonhuman asks

16. what system member is the strangest species?

17. do any system members have wings?

18. does your system have any animal system members?

19. what is the weirdest part about being a nonhuman system member?

20. is the majority of your system human or nonhuman?

introject asks

21. do you have multiple system members from one source?

22. are most of your system’s introjects connected to their source? disconnected from their source?

23. what is the weirdest source that an introject in your system has?

24. are any of your system’s introjects in relationships with other system members? is their partner(s) an introject from the same source? different source?

25. do any of your system’s introjects have non-canon source memories?

syscourse asks

26. do you engage in syscourse?

27. were you previously anti-endo?

28. if you could tell all anti-endos one thing, what would you tell them?

29. does your system have a collective opinion on syscourse, or does it vary?

30. do you think that syscourse is more helpful or harmful?

asks for the current fronter

31. who is your favorite member in the system? (alternatively, who are you closest to?)

32. which system member has the most based takes?

33. what is the funniest piece of system drama?

34. do you enjoy being part of a system?

35. what’s something you like that no one else in the system likes?