So... I used to be very close to a certain Goddess of Light and Discipline. The Chariot of the Sun. The Warrior Mother. Eventually we had a bit of a "falling off" in my practice. But she remained, present, just not actively leading my work. Letting other Ancestral Spirits in my court take the lead and show me the path that I needed to walk for a while.
Lately I've been seeing all sorts of little messages and omens that point back directly to Her, in the most unexpected ways. I thought She was just checking in on me. Spirits sometimes do that. In a "I'm still here, if you need me" sort of way.
Today, I was reading some poetry and the verses that resonated within me the most were about how we carry pieces of, or sometimes even become, the people we spend most of our time with. The people who helped make significant changes in our lives or the people who saved us.
And I can't stop thinking... is it that we become like them after those encounters, entangling ourselves with them over and over again... or is it that we were already like them, and the rivers of our lives just happened to find each other and merge. A younger, less experienced version of them, maybe. A little mirror where they saw a piece of themselves and that's precisely why they decided to be with us, and us with them.
And how that thought relates back to Gods that we are not necessarily already tied to before birth. Gods as Adoptive Parents that picked you up at your lowest. Saints and Heroes as Adoptive siblings that come to check on you when they find the time. Chosen family.
Is it because of the potential to be like them? What if it's specifically the rough edges of our humanity, that we're often so ashamed of, that call the Divine to us? Recognizing a little piece of Them in Us, feeling responsibility for us for that, feeling love even, in some cases. Kinship beyond the flesh.
Human or not, it's out of the question. We feel empathy towards non-human creatures all the time. We see a bit of ourselves in them, and care for them aswell. Why wouldn't the Gods, that are far more complex, in shape and depth and wisdom and experiences, than a human ever could be, and therefore much more capable of resembling others, be also much more capable of loving us for that?
Our own humanity and our distance from perfection seen as a beauty mark not a flaw.
All of this to say I would like to get back to Her, to working on my discipline and exercising Her tenets and to continue learning under Her tutelage. Because I can still feel that little spark fluttering in my heart, asking to be tended into a full fire. Whether it is my own, or Hers planted, or both, starts to matter less.
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praises from (some) bllk boys as bfs — a rating list. very objective. very serious. very canon.
chigiri: casual and very often, but means every word of it. often accompanied by a pat on the head or a forehead nuzzle. very proud of you and very loving, somehow feels like a bro though. 9.8/10 (if only he puts that shoujo manga aura sleeping potential he has. come on pretty boy.)
reo: hype man. good bf man. perfect man. will get the bouquet, will get you in his arm and spin you, will kiss you. public relationship? good, means he can do it in public. secret relationship? good, you get extra long kisses + cuddles. honestly no notes. is probably more proud of you than you are of yourself for whatever it is. 10/10.
isagi: keep the essay™ on how you are great in his head and usually go for the straight forward basic "you are amazing". if excited, you get a full body hug, if in boy next door mode you will get a besotted smile. both are good in their own way, just different expressions of genuine happiness. 8/10 (will add another 2 points if this is a subjective list)
sae: execution wise, need improvement. but because praise coming from him is like a black pearl or a blue moon during a supermoon and a lunar eclipse—the feeling of elation makes up for it. curt, short, and honestly a testament of how good the end result of your action is. but, objectively: 6/10 —adding a point because usually there are also head pats. 3 if not.
rin: is abysmal. please stop glaring because most people would translate it as them fucking up. but as his significant other, he will scoff and look at you three seconds too long then probably pat your shoulder once. probably a "so you can do it huh" if you are lucky. 3/10 way too constipated itoshi junior. (if he got through that teenage angst of his, 7. higher chance of "good job" because you are his favorite)
bachira: shouts. loud. very proud. another no notes. you get pats, kisses, hugs, kisses, and the list goes on. probably will have to get physically separated from you. if his mom is there too then will cheer along with him. afterward will take you somewhere as a celebratory date—it could range from buying a snack from the convenience store or a straight-up meal. honestly, you choose. 10/10.
bonus round: nagi — surprisingly 8/10. will immediately hug you and look so excited with wide open eyes and all like he just won something. ;; kaiser — 3/10 swallow that pride more and give something more than "see? you can do it" but extra point because high chance he gives you tough love motivation beforehand;; aryu — very osha before and after. very osha praises. osha / 10. no notes. ;; anri — miss gf will either cheer or cry out of happiness depending on how big your success is. if it's the latter please do your duty first. 7.5/10 please stop crying.
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Hottest Stand Battle - GRAND FINAL!
Stand abilities under the cut:
Star Platinum: Star Platinum is a close-range Stand with exceptional strength and speed, as well as gaining the ability to stop time during the fight against DIO.
Moody Blues: It possesses the ability to imitate the form of individuals and reenact past events with precision.
Sticky Fingers: It possesses a very versatile ability in the form of its zippers. The zippers have various applications, such as using them to travel through walls or floors, detaching and attaching limbs, and storing objects inside something. Bucciarati is also free to attach several things together with his zippers.
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