#'don't leave me behind' I'm going to cry!!!!
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
scribblesofagoonerr · 3 days ago
Text
Tumblr media
new girlfriend drama | buddy & monkey: double the trouble
summary: leah finally introduces her new girlfriend, elle, to buddy and monkey
double the trouble masterlist
Tumblr media
The buzz of the stadium surrounded you as you waited inside the tunnel,  lined up with the rest of the team - Leah was standing at the front, the Captain's armband proudly displayed around her arm in the absence of Kim.
It was matchday, and you were hyped.
You were focused, determined and ready to win.
And what's better? You were playing against Aston Villa, meaning you were going head to head with Jordan.
"Boo!" You crept up behind the smaller woman, wrapping your arm around her shoulder, "Happy birthday, Mama!"
"Thanks, little one," Jordan smiled, reaching up to stand on her tiptoes since you had that slight advantage of tallness over her as she pressed a kiss to the top of your head, "Good luck out there, yeah? Don't go scoring on me now!"
"Pfft, as if," You waved her off, reluctant to wipe the smirk on your face, "Have you seen Buddy yet? I know she wanted to give you her present!"
"Not yet, but I'm sure I'll catch up with her after the game," Jordan replied, still smiling.
You felt a nudge on your shoulder as your eyes darted round to meet Leah's, "Are you ready, my girl? You've got this, stay sharp, yeah?"
"I always do!" You grinned back, a bit too confident for your own good.
"Don't get too cocky now. We could win," Jordan warned, her tone amused.
"We will see," Leah chuckled, shaking her head in amusement, "Good luck, and happy birthday, Jord!" She wished her ex-girlfriend belated birthday wishes.
"Yeah, don't cry when I nutmeg you!" You couldn't help but chip in cheekily, just as the familiar beat kicked in to the sound of 'London's calling' and you began to walk out, proud to the loud roar of the fans around the stadium.
This was your game, no question.
Tumblr media
After the game, you were drenched, your body aching from the torrential rain that hadn't let up the entire 90 minutes. The only thing you wanted right now was to get changed, find warmth and collapse in bed.
But Leah had other plans, apparently.
"When you're done getting changed, I want you to come with me. I've got someone for you to meet," The blonde said, catching you in the midst of getting ready in the dressing room after the victory celebration.
You couldn't resist the groan that slipped out your mouth, "Seriously?"
"Yes," Leah replied, stifling a smile as she shook her head, "I really think you'll like her. Just hurry up and get dressed, okay?"
"Urgh," You grumbled, not in the mood for introductions at all.
You were soaked to the bone from playing in the miserable British weather for the whole match, and the last thing you wanted to do right now was to meet somebody.
That did not sit well with you.
"Why? I'm coooold!" You didn't hesitate to complain at all, you were making it very well known that you weren't in the mood to meet anybody.
Regardless of whoever they might be.
"Well you won't be that cold if you hurry up and get changed," Leah retorted, collecting all of her own things together to get ready to leave, "Come on, hurry up."
"Urgh, what's with all the fuss?" You huffed in disagreement.
You were soon to find out what all the fuss was about - Leah wanted you to meet her new girlfriend, which you had mixed feelings about.
You definitely found it weird when Leah started seeing someone new. You were briefly aware of this new girlfriend, Elle, you knew she was someone special to Leah - but you never actually met her, even during pre-season in America or that unforgettable trip to Nashville. 
You knew it was bound to happen one day, and apparently today was the infamous day to meet Elle Smith, otherwise known as Miss USA.
For as long as you can always remember since you moved in with Leah and Jordan, it had always been the two of them, and they were a team within a team, both on and off the pitch - well until Jordan ended up moving to Aston Villa, but that's a different story.
Of course you knew both Leah and Jordan would find different partners, but that didn't mean you had to like it.
You definitely did not.
"Quit looking so grumpy," Leah nudged your shoulder.
"I don't want to meet her," You complained for what felt like the hundredth time, as you waited for the lift to take you upstairs where you were about to finally meet the woman that Leah had been seeing for quite some time now, "I'm cold, I'm tired. I just want to go home and go to bed. That's it, I don't want to meet Elle."
You were really in a bad mood after the game, although you had won with a 4 nil victory, it had poured down with rain throughout the whole game and as a result, you now felt completely miserable.
You also felt pretty bad about the loss for Jordan and her team, especially since the fixture was on her birthday as well.
It was a tough loss for her, and she didn’t waste any time hanging around either.
It was definitely not a good idea for Leah to decide to introduce you to her new girlfriend now of all times while you felt so grumpy.
"Why not? I really think you might like her," Leah replied, her tone light but firm.
"Yeah, well, I don't... " You shot back, pouting, "Why do I' gotta meet her?"
Leah exhaled a sigh, pinching the bridge of her nose, "Would you stop? Look, I really like Elle, and I'm happy. So, now I just want you girls to finally meet her, okay?"
"Whatever," You muttered, but the tension was still there.
"Monkey, stop," Leah chastised, knowing there was people around, "There's people around here still." She reminded you with a knowing look, but it still didn't stop you from sulking.
"I wouldn't be complaining so much if you weren't forcing me to meet her," Your retorted, voice full of bratty annoyance.
"You make it sound like it's such a terrible thing," Leah spoke aloud, exhaling a deep sigh as her patience was wearing thin, "I really want you girls to meet Elle, I think you'll like her." She added.
"She can't replace Jordan," You muttered, still not convinced.
"I wouldn't ever dream of that happening, my girl," Leah said, her voice soft but serious, as if to reassure you.
Tumblr media
"This lift is taking forever!" You complained as you felt like the lift was taking forever to reach the top.
Leah chuckled, shaking her head as she responded to a text on her phone, "Anything else you want to complain about today?" She teased.
"Well... Now that you mention it--" You begin to speak, caught off guard by the lift door opening and you're met with your favourite little buddy, "Buddy!" You shout, your grumpiness quickly overturned seeing the three year old.
"Monks'!" The said three year old plows into your legs, her eyes wide with excitement as she wraps both her arms around you, "Miss 'ou soooo much!" She told you, dramatically.
"I missed you soooo much too!" You retorted, playfully as you ruffled her hair.
Buddy's attention didn't last long on you though as she spotted Leah, "Mummy!" Not hesitating to run over to her and launch herself on her.
"Oft, there's my little bubba!" Leah crouches down to meet her, just in time for a bear hug that leaves her grinning, "Hiya! Did you watch all of the game?"
"Uh huh! I' got 'cited when Monks' scored!" Buddy rambled, her voice full of excitement.
"You saw that? I made sure to score just for you!" You joked, grinning from ear to ear.
Buddy continued to beam a wide smile, her excitement tangible, "Ou' score good goal, Monks'!" 
"Well done today sweetheart. Very impressive!" Amanda chimed in, proud.
"I try my best," You waved off the praise with a smile, still not entirely used to it.
Leah straightened up and motioned to Elle, who stood a little further back to come a bit closer, "Right girls, come here. I'd like for you to both meet someone very important too me, okay?"
"Who are 'ou?" Buddy questions, her voice full of innocent curiosity.
"Girls, this is Elle, and she's mummy's special friend," Leah carefully introduced her to you both, making sure that Buddy was able to understand her words, "Do you think you can say hi?" She asked, guiding you both forward.
"Hi. I' Buddy!" Buddy of course was eager to meet her, waving enthusiastically.
"Hi there, Buddy! It's very nice to meet you," Elle crouches down to Buddy's level with a kind smile on her face, "And you must be Monkey?"
You nod faintly, shoving your heads in your trouser pockets, "Alright."
"Don't mind Monkey," Leah quickly added, "She's not very keen on meeting new people. Don't take it personally."
"I don't like you, so listen 'ere, yeah?" You started, channeling all your gangster-watching vibes  going through a current phase of watching the Kray Twins, the two famous London gangsters, "You hurt me' mum, and I know exactly where to hide bodies. So, don't even think about it, or you should learn to sleep with one eye open. Got it?"
Elle's face flickered with confusion, her eyes darting between you and Leah, unsure what to make of the threat, "Uh, right. Gotcha," She muttered, clearly thrown off by the whole interaction.
Leah rolled her eyes, quickly covering your mouth with her hand, "Ignore her, she's going through a phase right now," She told Elle, shooting you  a stern look, "You be quiet, you are still scared to sleep without the light on fifty percent of the time. You're not hard at all, so zip it."
You go wide-eyed, your cheeks burn as the tough act completely falls apart.
You go to open your mouth in protest, however it doesn't turn out the way you planned, "Don't even think about it," Leah warned you with a pointed finger.
Tumblr media
"Rooooar!"  Buddy's eccentric voice was loud throughout the whole restaurant, where you'd been forced to come after the game, "Elle! Do 'ou like dino'daurs?" She was eager to know, forcefully trying to shove the plastic dinosaur into Elle's own hand.
"Are you kidding? You bet I do!" Elle agreed, accepting the sticky covered dinosaur out of Buddy's grasp since the three year old attempted to dunk it directly in the chocolate sauce of her ice cream sundae, "Do you have a favourite one that you like?"
"Uh huh! I 'ove my dino'daurs!" Buddy nodded, smiling from ear to ear as she animatedly chatted to Elle all about the different dinosaurs she had, which was the best out of them, "Steg'saurus da' bestest!"
Unlike Buddy, you still hadn't easily been convinced as you sat there, your arms crossed over your chest as you didn't hold back the eye roll as you watched Buddy and Elle interact with each other. Leah sat across from them, smiling fondly at the two, but you couldn't help but feel a little left out of the joy.
You weren't keen to be here at all.
You slumped in your seat, barely glancing up from your phone as you fiddled with it, pretending to not care about anything happening around you. The restaurant was bustling with energy, people talking, laughing, but you just couldn't seem to get into it.
Leah immediately clocked your reluctance to join in on the conversation, "Cheer up my girl."
"Why? I don't want to be here!" You grumbled, making it very well known about your feelings for being in the restaurant at that current moment.
Leah exhaled a sigh, sending you a knowing look, "I know you might not, but can you at least pretend like you're having fun?"
"But I'm not though..." You don't sugar-coat your words, you definitely don't want to be here, and you're not about to act like you do.
"We'll be going home in a bit," Leah told you, resisting the urge to roll her own eyes as she caught sight of you scrunching your face up in further protest,"You know, if you continue to screw your face up like that then it might stick like it,  eh?"
"Ha ha, very funny," You deadpan, rolling your eyes at the blondes' wittiness.
"I know it seems like a lot, but come on, Buddy's warmed up to her. Do you think you might be able to do the same for me?" Leah tries her luck, hoping that you might change your mind, or at least be somewhat nice to Elle.
You continue to scowl across the table at the American woman, "I don't like her."
"You don't know her well enough to decide that though right now," Leah explains, her tone of voice gentle as she understands this might be hard for you to grasp.
"My minds already made up," You shake your head in protest, slumping back down into your seat,"When can we go home? I'm bored."
Leah exhales a sigh, pinching the bridge of her nose, "In a bit. Just try and cheer up a bit, please?"
"But I'm bored, like super bored here, and I can do so much more at home!" You exclaim.
"So, Monkey," Elle begins, catching your attention now Buddy's sole focus is on the sticker book in front of her, or more so, the stickers she's putting everywhere around the table and chairs, coats, bags, phone cases, you name it - if it's there in eye-sight, its' been stickered.
You couldn't resist the smirk that appeared on your face, "So, she-devil..."
"Monkey," Leah scolded, fixing you with a sharp pointed look.
"What? I think it's a cute nickname," You feigned innocence, holding your hands up in the air in mock-surrender, "I can try another, if you'd like?"
Leah narrowed her eyebrow, "Watch it."
"Alright, alright," You rolled your eyes at the blonde sat opposite you, "What's up, El-Dog?" You tried again.
"Monkey," Leah repeated, continuing to look at you with a sharp look.
You huffed in response, not holding back on another eye roll and slumping back to lean against your chair, "Oh come on, you know I like nicknames... Elle... I don't know what rhymes with it," You retorted, shrugging your shoulders.
"You're very funny," Elle chimed in.
"Thank you, I'm training to be a part time comedian," You told her in a sarcastic tone of voice, a shit-eating grin on your face, having more enjoyment in winding this woman up, "Want to hear a knock-knock joke?"
"No she's not, she's winding you up," Leah interjected before you had the chance to spout anything more, "Knock it off, Menace. I mean it."
Elle chuckled, waving her hand off as she didn't seem so phased by your reluctance to speak to her, "So, Monkey, is that like a nickname you have?"
"I don't know, Elle, is yours a nickname for something else?" You shot back, innocently.
"Monkey is one of her many nicknames," Leah chimed in, "My other favourite ones' for her are Menace and my girl, both of them very self-explanatory."
"I see," Elle nodded in agreement, taking a moment to take a sip of her drink, "Leah tells me that you really like Lego. That's cool."
You didn't dare bat an eye, "Yeah, so, what's it to you?"
"Monkey, enough of that," Leah chided, nudging your shoulder.
"Yeah, I guess..." You begrudgingly agreed, leaning forward and attempting to blow bubbles in your drink with the straw, "I find it cool, and it helps me calm down sometimes, and whatnot."
Leah gave you a faint smile and nodded, "My whole house is overrun with Lego since both the girls love it so much."
"Duh? Lego is amazing, Malfoy!" You perked up, not resisting the urge to call Leah out by a nickname, since they're one of your favourite things to give people.
Elle shared a confused look between yourself and Leah, "Malfoy? Like, uh, Harry Potter?" She questioned.
"Yep!" Your excitement suddenly reached a new level, nodding your head in agreement, ditching blowing bubbles in your drink, "Have you ever watched it? Le definitely has a haircut like him!"
"Brilliant," Leah muttered in disbelief, shaking her head, "I think I preferred it when you were quiet instead now after all."
"I'm bored again," You complained dramatically, setting your drink down.
Leah rolled her eyes and reached into her own bag and pulled out some colouring pages and crayons, "Here. Happy now?"
Your eyes lit up despite yourself, “Colouring? Yes!” Grabbing the crayons, you started to scribble, regardless of the fact of your age, you were at least somewhat occupied for the time being.
“See?” Leah said, laughing softly, “I told you she’s harmless. She’s just a big kid, it’s unreal.”
“I’m not a big kid…” You felt a heat rise in your cheeks, not liking being called out like that, but you couldn’t help the grin that tugged at the corners of your lips. 
“Keep telling yourself that,” Leah teased, ruffling your hair. 
“Accusations. False accusations!” You grumbled underneath your breath, however, you grabbed a crayon and continued to scribble on the page. You weren’t fully ready to warm up to Elle, but slowly started to let the walls come down.
Buddy's little face scrunched up in concentration as she started to tug at Leah's hand, "Mummy! I... I' need toilet!" She exclaimed,  the urgency in her voice leaving no room for hesitation.
Leah didn't even flinch at the sudden demand, "Come on then, bubba. We'd better go find it quickly," She said, getting to her feet, quick and straight to the point, "You play nice, alright?"
You rolled your eyes at the interaction, turning your attention to your phone, "Pfft, oh please... I always play nice!" You muttered to yourself, though your eyes were glued to the screen instead of the woman in the room.
Elle, sensing the lull in the conversation, turned to you with a curious smile, "So, Monkey, what is that you like to do?"
You didn't immediately respond, not feeling particularly inclined to talk to her. But then, an idea flashed in your mind that could be so much better than small talk.
This might just be your chance to get someone else on board for the ultimate adventure -- skydiving!
"Oh, I have hobbies!" You said with an enthusiastic grin, "Yeah, I'm so adventurous and that. Like skydiving and all the different things like that!"
Elle raised an eyebrow, clearly intrigued but cautious, "Skydiving, huh? That sounds kind of dangerous. Are you allowed to do things like that, with you being a professional footballer?"
"Oh, yeah, totally!" You waved your hand dismissively, like it was the least of your worries, "Do you want to go? We could go together, and it could be so fun!"
"Uh..." Elle hesitated for a second, but then to your surprise, shrugged, "Sure, that does sound like fun!"
You were now all but practically bouncing in your seat, a grin spreading across your face, "Awesome! So, uh, where is it that you live in America?" You decided it was probably best to try and ask some questions to at least seem interested, at least you hoped it was America where she lived.
Elle seemed to enjoy the change in pace as she answered, "Oh, I live in New York. Have you ever been?"
"Nope, never, but it sounds, like so sick!" You exclaimed, "They have that big tree there at Christmas as well, innit?"
"Yeah, it's really quite cool to look at," Elle replied, smiling at your enthusiasm.
"And do they have that ice as well?" You pressed, already seeing the path ahead.
"Oh yeah, they do..." Elle continued to nod in agreement, "Do you like to ice skate?"
"Sure, totally," You agree with a simple shrug of your shoulders, "So, do they have sky divng as well?"
Elle's eyes widened slightly, "Yeah, I think they have something like somewhere you can do it inside!"
Bingo, it was almost too convincing now!
"Really? Oh sick! We have to do it!" Your mind was completely made up now on the idea of going there for that one reason in particular, your eyes lighting up as you spotted Leah and Buddy return from their toilet trip, "Le! I wanna go to New York-- Le! Le! Can we... Can we go?"
"Whoa, slow down," Leah gave you an incredulous look, "Go where?" She asked, confused.
"New York!" You repeated, practically vibrating with excitement, "It sounds neat, don't it? We have to go!" You said with urgency.
Leah raised an eyebrow, her arms crossed in a casual but knowing stance, "Whoa, whoa, slow down a second. What am I missin'? You've changed your tune all of a sudden, haven't you?"
"We neeeeed to go. Pleaaaaase!" You almost whined, shifting from foot to foot, your excitement contagious.
"We will see, Menace, alright? I'm sure we can try and figure it out," Leah said, though her tone held an edge of amusement, clearly having no clue where this was truly heading.
"Yeeeees! Get in!" You cheered, punching your air in victory, "Cool! Oh yeah-- Elle, I got a question for you, and it's super important." You continued to quiz her without missing a single beat, "Depending on how you answer this, all but depends on if we can even be considered mutuals..."
Elle raised an eyebrow, "Sure, hit me with it!"
"Alright," You leaned in slightly, "Do you think pineapple belongs on pizza?" You questioned, deadpan.
"It's good," Elle answered simply.
You let out a loud whoop of excitement, causing Leah to give you a side-eye, "Right? Niiiiice! Okay, I think I changed my mind, I can begin to like you. Our sky diving trip is going to be amazing!"
And that's where you slipped up...
"Whoa, I'm sorry. Backup there... Skydiving?" Leah chimed in, holding her hand in protest, giving you a firm look, "Monkey! We've already talked about this!"
You winced in protest, "Damn it, so close..."
Leah folded her arms, trying her hardest to remain composed, "You know that skydiving is completely out of the question, and it's not happening!"
You groaned dramatically, clearly not willing to accept the defeat just yet, "You're such a buzzkill sometimes, Le!"
"I only agreed because I thought you were completely okay with it, I swear," Elle said, her tone almost apologetic.
Leah let out a soft sigh, her arms folding across her chest, "It's fine. Monkey knows she's not allowed to do it, and it's not your fault, babe," Her voice was calm but firm, offering a reassuring smile to Elle, “Nice try, Menace. No skydiving, and that’s final!”
Tumblr media
© scribblesofagoonerr
199 notes · View notes
caspiansinclair · 2 days ago
Text
TRK KANDREW QUOTES:
- "Andrew twisted and punched the wall hard enough to split the skin along his knuckles. Kevin took a quick step forward, hand out like he could stop Andrew from landing a second blow"
- "You shouldn't be outside if you're coming down with something," Kevin said. "Such concern." Andrew grinned at Kevin's cool tone. "Don't cry, Kevin. It's nothing a nap and some vitamin C can't fix."
- Kevin had a knee hugged to his chest and his face hidden in the fold of his arm. His knuckles were white where his hand was clenched into a fist. Neil didn't think it was the bus that was making Kevin shake like that. "Look at me," Andrew said. "It'll be fine. You believe me, yes?" "I believe you," Kevin said, muffled but noticeably strained.
- "Andrew has neither purpose nor ambition," Kevin said. "I was the first person who ever looked at Andrew and told him he was worth something. When he comes off these drugs and has nothing else to hold him up I will give him something to build his life around." (my fav quote)
- Kevin had eyes only for Andrew as he crouched in front of the downed goalkeeper. "So," Kevin said, "did you have fun?" Andrew was too tired to put any heat in his words. "You are despicable, Kevin Day. I don't know why I keep you around."
- Kevin only smiled, slow and sure and pleased, and offered Andrew a hand. Andrew looked at it, then at Kevin, and let Kevin haul him to his feet.
- "Why do you have his drugs?" "I hold onto them when he's adjusting his schedule," Kevin answered. "Game nights or nights like tonight when he wants to go into withdrawal, it's better if someone else keeps the bottle. If he has his pills he'll take them. He won't be able to help himself."
- "When I said I wasn't Andrew's type, I meant it. It's not about my looks or faith. It's that I'm a woman." Neil heard her words but was slow to understand them. He blinked at her in confusion, blinked again when it clicked, and said a little too loudly, "Oh. Then Andrew and Kevin—"
- "Andrew won't agree to this," Abby said, a last-ditch effort to change their minds. "Going means leaving Kevin behind. They haven't had more than a campus between them since Andrew took Kevin under his wing."
- "Kevin," Andrew called from out of sight. Kevin nearly knocked the chair over in his hurry to answer. Neil watched from the doorway as Andrew stopped almost right up against Kevin. Andrew pat Kevin down for imaginary injuries and Kevin stood motionless until he was done."
- "Look at that face, Bee. He wants me sober more than almost anyone does, but only if the timing's right. I warned you, didn't I? Who will take care of Kevin if I'm gone? I can't trust him wandering around here by himself, and Coach can't be with him all the time. Kevin's kind of a full-time job."
- "I can't believe you're sending Andrew away," Kevin said, a little sharply.
- "She shouldn't have taken Andrew away," Kevin said in a low voice.
- Kevin is not like us; he is valuable but he is not property in the same sense. He escaped because he had family to run to." "Andrew?" Neil guessed.
- “Kevin had spent the better part of a year trying to get through to Andrew. He wanted Exy to mean something; he wanted Andrew’s best preformance like a dying man wanted one last breath of air. Andrew knew it, and he refused to play along.”
- (this one’s long:) "So you'll try," Kevin said through gritted teeth, "because Coach asked you to."
Andrew folded his arms across his knees, tilted his head back, and smiled up at Kevin.
"Careful, Kevin. Your jealous streak is showing."
"For eight months you've told me no. In eight seconds you told him yes. Why?"
"Oh, that's easy." Andrew stuffed the last of his gear into his bag and zipped it shut. He slung the bag over his shoulders and got to his feet, standing up so close to Kevin he almost knocked Kevin back a step.
"It's just more fun to tell you no. That's what you wanted, right? You wanted me to have fun. I am. Aren't you?"
For someone so small, Andrew made a lot of noise when shoved into the lockers. Andrew was laughing as he crashed into the orange metal. Neil didn't know what amused Andrew more: Kevin's violence or the splash of blood that now stained the front of Kevin's shirt. Neil hadn't even seen Andrew take a knife out, but it was in his hand in the air between them. Kevin retreated from Andrew with a sharp curse.
"Jesus, Andrew!" Matt said. "Kevin, are you all right?"
"I'm fine." Kevin put a hand to his chest as if checking the truth of his words. Neil was at the far end of the lockers from them, so he couldn't see very well, but the relative lack of blood made him think the cut was shallow. It was long, but it wasn't serious. It was going to sting when Kevin put heavy armor overtop it tonight, though.
Andrew stepped away from the lockers and got in Kevin's space again. He put the edge of the blade against Kevin's chest over his heart and peered up into Kevin's face. Kevin looked more angry than intimidated as he stared back. Matt started toward them, maybe thinking he had to break up round two of their fight. Kevin didn't look away from Andrew when he motioned at Matt to back off.”
90 notes · View notes
thezombieprostitute · 2 days ago
Text
Second Chances
Tumblr media
A/N: Written for @the-slumberparty's December Daze Challenge.
Prompt: the car broke down and the snow is getting deep
A/N2: A follow up to Everyone Leaves.
Warnings: Alcoholism, Angst. Please let me know if I missed any!
Tumblr media
"Merry Christmas to me," you sarcastically grumble as your car fails to start up.
It's been the year from hell. You've been hounded by the loan sharks that call themselves banks, asking after your student loans. Your dad's health got so much worse, which is why you're stuck in the hospital parking lot. Oh, and your increasingly distant boyfriend refused to change his ways and you had to leave him.
Part of you had hoped he'd stop you. Apologize. Anything, really, to show he actually cared about you. But clearly that was asking too much of Curtis "always alone" Everett. Then again, considering he got fired soon after for showing up to work drunk, maybe it was for the best that you parted ways. You had enough on your plate without taking care of him as well.
You try the engine one more time and still get nothing. You want to take some time to just cry but the snow is piling up and you can't stay at the hospital. Sighing you call for a tow truck. You'll use the time between the call and the truck's arrival to let your tears out.
Tumblr media
When the tow truck pulls up you quickly wipe away your tears. You're sure whoever is driving has seen plenty of people crying in frustration, if not outright raging, but you still don't want your own tears to be seen. You step out to greet the driver and you both stop in your tracks. It's Curtis.
Curtis looks at you, his face contorted into an expression of pain, sadness. He looks like he wants to say something but is scared to. You're sure you don't look any better. You both start and stop a few times before you shake your head and point to your car. "Engine won't start" is all you say but Curtis nods, and gets to work.
As he starts hooking up your car he points to the cab of his truck. "It's nice and warm in there. You go ahead and settle in, keep warm?" You nod with a little "thanks" and head into the passenger side of the truck.
Settling in, you didn't realize how cold you'd been. It seems like your shivers were both from crying and the cold. The truck is delightfully warm and you let yourself relax a little. You're genuinely happy Curtis seems to have landed on his feet. If anything, you're surprised he was so expressive with you. He was never the type to really show what he was feeling, just locking it up behind his stoic facade.
When he climbs into the driver's side you do your best to clam up. He was the one who pushed you away, he can put in the work to try to draw you back. If that's what he even wants. And if he doesn't, well, it's on him, not you.
"Do you want me to drop you off at your place before or after taking the car to garage?" he asks. His voice is shakier than you've ever heard it.
"Probably after," you reply. "Make sure the garage has my details and contact info."
He nods. "Just gotta be careful. The snow's getting worse and I don't want you stranded there."
"I understand. But you know I like my records and receipts."
He nods and sets to driving.
The drive is quiet but the tension in the air is heavy. You want to say something, anything, but you hold firm. He drove the wedge between you, he can be the one to remove it.
When you get to the garage Curtis helps you out of the truck and introduces you to his new buddy, Edgar, before going to the back room.
You and Edgar get to talking, he's a nice kid. Lots of energy and a warm smile. You wonder allowed how he and Curtis became friends.
"Oh, we met in AA," Edgar tells you. "I'm actually his sponsor."
"He's in AA? I knew he was drunk at work once, I didn't think that was worth signing up to Alcoholics Anonymous."
Edgar hesitates, "it's not my place to tell you the whole story, but he ended up in the hospital."
Your hand flies to your mouth as you gasp. Sure, Curtis wasn't one to turn up a drink when you were together, but to go that far? "Well, I'm glad he's got you to help him out," you nod.
"Do you mind me asking how you know him?"
"We used to date."
Edgar's eyes widen at that. "You're the one who got away!"
You give him a pained expression as you hear Curtis growl from the doorway, "now's not the time, Edgar."
"Sure thing, old man," Edgar rolls his eyes, making you smile. "Let's go ahead and get your information so you can get home before the roads get too messed up to drive."
When you get the paperwork taken care of Curtis steps up, "can I drive you home? I'd...I'd feel better if...if you took my truck and not some dinky uber or lyft car."
Your heart clenches. You can see he's trying so you agree. Plus, he's not wrong about his truck being safer. He opens the passenger door for you and helps you get in before climbing into the driver's seat.
After a few minutes, Curtis breaks the tension. "I'm guessing your dad's not doing too well?"
"Nope," you shake your head. "The cold seems to just make things worse." Curtis nods.
The rest of your trip is spent in silence.
Tumblr media
When Curtis pulls up to your building you're ready jump out of the truck to escape the tension. But when you go to unbuckle he says, "can we talk?"
"Yes." That's all you'll give him, if only to protect yourself.
"I'm sorry," he starts. "I'm sorry for everything. For how I treated you. I...I thought I was protecting myself by keeping distant. But when you left I...it hurt so much more than I ever could've expected."
You look at him and see tears forming in his eyes.
"I... I genuinely thought it was just how things work," he continues. "But you left, when I drove you away, I couldn't...I just ended up drinking until I blacked out. Next thing I know I'm in the hospital. No job. No friends." He lets out a sob. "I knew, laying there in that bed, that if I hadn't...if I'd treated you better, I wouldn't be so alone and miserable."
Tears are now streaming from your own eyes.
"I've been getting help since then. Been trying to change for the better." He turns to face you, "I've hurt you and I'll never ask you to take me back. But is there any chance, any at all, that you'd let me back into your life? Even just as a friend?"
You sit for a few minutes, but you don't leave and Curtis starts to hope.
When you finally speak you tell him, "the best apology is changed behavior. And you have definitely changed. For the better."
Curtis's breath hitches.
You continue, "you hurt me more than I think you know. But you've clearly been doing some introspection, getting some help, and that speaks volumes to your willingness to make amends. You've got a long road to redemption with me, but you've made some good strides."
Taking his hand in yours you look him in the eyes, "we can start again as friends."
Curtis's shoulders sag as he starts crying tears of relief. You can't help yourself and wrap him in a hug, letting your own tears fall freely. He's repeatedly whispering "thank you," and "I'll do better. I promise."
When you break the hug, he doesn't fight you but you know it's because he's being respectful rather than a sign of his disinterest. You open the passenger door and turn back to him with a soft smile, "Merry Christmas, Curtis."
Tumblr media
Tagging: @alicedopey; @delicatebarness; @icefrozendeadlyqueen; @irishhappiness; @lokislady82; @ronearoundblindly; @thiquefunlover63
Also tagging @brandycranby as she was the one sent the original ask.
82 notes · View notes
Text
Favorite Gifts
Tumblr media
Summary: You and Dean know exactly what you want for Christmas...just each other.
Pairing: Dean x Reader (You)
Warnings: None. Kissing. Fluff. Pretty much all fluff. (Very brief mentions of child abduction. This fic is all fluff, rest assured, but I don't want to take any chances on a possible trigger.)
Word Count: 657
A/N: All I want for Christmas is Dean, and I know I'm not alone. So, I'm offering this up as a little Christmas present. Enjoy!! Merry Christmas!!
P.S. I wrote this quickly around all the Christmas Eve busy-ness, so please excuse any mistakes! ❤️
Dean Master List || Christmas Master List || Main Master List || Tag Lists
Tumblr media
You'd gone to sleep that Christmas Eve, alone in Dean's bed. It felt enormous and empty, but at least it smelled like him.
He'd called earlier in the day to tell you that he and Sam were no closer to tracking down the weird, unknown monster, that was snatching up children and leaving their parents terrified and distraught.
It wasn't a case they could postpone or walk away from without winning. It broke your heart that you'd be celebrating Christmas alone in the big drafty bunker. But you forced yourself to think of the poor parents whose little ones weren't going to be home on Christmas morning, and you knew your heartbreak paled in comparison.
So, you'd simply resigned yourself to the situation and closed your eyes not long after midnight, and proceeded to toss and turn for a couple of hours before finally falling asleep.
You'd only been sleeping for a few hours when Dean slid himself in behind you on the bed. At first you simply incorporated him into your dreams, easy to do since he lived there every night when he was away anyway.
You sighed softly as his hard, warm body fitted itself around you, enveloping you within his strong arms. But slowly, small things began to pierce through the veil of your sleep. You inhaled the scent of him - gunpowder and mint - that your sleeping brain could never quite get right.
When he nuzzled his lips along your neck, the shiver that coursed through you was so much more vivid than your imagination could ever conjure, that it woke you up completely.
Your eyes popped open and you wrenched yourself up and away from him so that you could turn around to see him for real. When his cheeky, lopsided grin spread across his face you gasped.
“Heya sweetheart.” He said warmly, making you screech like a banshee and launch yourself into his arms.
You wanted to ask him how he'd managed to get back in time for Christmas morning, but you couldn't manage it; you were too busy smothering his face in kisses.
He was laughing under your onslaught, but eventually he rolled on top of you, grasping your cheeks in his big hands and holding you still so he could kiss you properly.
His lips moved on yours skillfully, teasing your mouth open and then sweeping his tongue inside, inhaling you and swallowing down your little mewls of satisfaction.
When he pulled away you were crying; you'd been sick with missing him, and now that he was here, you could hardly believe your senses.
Dean understood your happy tears, he saw them often. So he just thumbed them away as you took a shuddering breath.
“How did you get here?” A sudden thought hit you and your stomach lurched. “The kids…”
Dean shook his head and smiled at you. “No, they're fine. All of them. Home with their moms and dads, getting ready to open their presents. Monster's gone.”
He clicked his tongue as he made a slashing gesture across his throat with his thumb.
“So, I put the pedal to the medal and me and Sammy got home just a few minutes ago.” He sniffed at himself. “Sorry, probably shoulda showered.” He joked
But you shook your head and pulled him down to kiss him again. “No.” You mumbled against his lips. “I like you just like this. Fresh from the fight and tangled up in me.”
He hitched your leg up to his hip so he could press tightly into the warm apex of your thighs.
He moaned softly. “I like you just like this too. Soft, smelling like sleep, and all wrapped around me.”
He kissed you a little longer and then settled you against his chest.
“God, I missed you sweetheart. Just so you know, whatever's under the tree, you're always gonna be my favorite gift.”
The happy tears were back as you nuzzled into his neck and whispered back. “And you're mine. Easily. Merry Christmas, Dean.”
Tumblr media
Tags Under the Cut:
@lyarr24 @lacilou @deans-spinster-witch @globetrotter28 @suckitands33
@alwaystiredandconfused @jzackles @jackles010378 @impala67rollingthroughtown @krazykelly
@candy-coated-misery0731 @envyaurora95 @spnwoman @deans-baby-momma @luvr4miya
@arcannaa @viviwatchestv @winharry @ladysparkles78 @kr804573
@whimsyfinny @roonthelittlespoon920 @slamminmine @zepskies @safiyas-world
@aylacavebear @kazsrm67 @slut-for-evans-stan @sexyvixen7 @nancymcl
@hobby27 @waywardcheshire @livya99 @k-slla @leigh70
@eevvvaa @kickingitwithkirk @foxyjwls007 @roseblue373 @mishkatelwarriorgoddess
@avanatural @mrsjenniferwinchester @all-alone-he-turns-to-stone @deangirl96 @stoneyggirl2
@fanfic-n-tabulous @traiitorjoe @lastcallatrockysbar @b3autyfuld1sast3r
52 notes · View notes
littlebittyhollowbugs · 3 months ago
Text
Thinking about Mato and crying
He was the weakest of the brothers but the most excited and determined to become a nail master.
He looked up to Sheo so much, he is still thinking about him and hoping that he thinks of him and Oro in turn.
Sheo left them at some point to pursue another path and Oro betrayed and left Mato probably not long after.
Despite Mato's grudge against Oro the evidence that he still cares for him very much is there. specifically in the god home, where he jumps in to defend Oro when he is knocked down.
His dream nail dialogue in the fight is "Brothers always fight together!" And "Don't leave me behind!"
Clearly he feels he was abandoned by his brothers.
He thinks that he is unworthy of even being in the presence of the nail sage. His own father.
Mato is so enthusiastic and kind and so so lonely!!
He feels he is abandoned and unwanted, and he so desperately wants to be wanted!
and the thing that really gets me is just how much effort he puts into making it especially clear how loved and wanted his own pupil is!
If you choose not to be taught by him, he assumes you believe you are unworthy and quickly assures you that isn't true.
He gives you grand compliments, and tells you that "you honor him beyond words."
Even when he begins rambling about Oro after learning that you had met him, he quickly catches himself and says "I'm sorry. I shouldn't bother you with such things. I'm happy you were able to train under another nailmaster and grow stronger."
He so readily sets aside his grudge, and expresses his happiness for you !!
He genuinely wants his pupil to be proud of themself. He doesn't want them to ever feel the way he did.
He is so loving and so lonely..
When you come to visit him again for the first time, he is genuinely surprised and says it is "an honor he scarcely deserves"
This man needs a family!! This is a family man he shouldn't be alone!!!!
69 notes · View notes
katierosefun · 11 months ago
Text
actually as much as i love mike and harvey together. i feel so sad for rachel zane because imagine falling in love with your coworker and then you learn that your coworker is a fake lawyer but not only that, your coworker is a fake lawyer who would literally do anything for his boss. he'll literally leave you at the altar to go to prison for his boss. he'll try to quit his job multiple times but keep coming back because his boss asked him to come back. he'll move to seattle with you, and you'll breathe a sigh of relief because it means that it can finally just be the two of you, but then you learn that he's inviting his stupid former boss to join them. and his stupid former boss agrees. you smile because your husband is so stupid happy at the idea of working with his former boss again, but you've seen this film one too many times before, and you are going to be subject to watching your husband choose his stupid former boss-slash-friend over you again and again and again and again and again and ag
36 notes · View notes
a-s-levynn · 1 year ago
Text
Tumblr media
"Even if the sky cracks in mourning / And the heavens just won't open up for me" A Series of Small Offerings - II/12 - day20
#a series of small offerings#sleep token fanart#elaboration on this piece further down in the tags because this one may confuse people i think#(also please note that i firmly believe that the from the room below version of this song is the superior one)#(so the art was made with that version in mind because that is the version that lives rent free in my brain for reasons)#i've been thinking so much how to approach this one.. i knew pretty much since i've made the challenge that i will go with this line#specifically because i refuse to hear it as the lyrics sites and spotify tells me to hear it (as it appears in the post) but instead#i don't hear the 'the' in any version of the song i'm sorry that is just not there#so i'm convinced it is 'as the sky cracks in mourning'#(sky cracking-lightning;sky mourning-rain)#which is also exactly how the song feels to me#being a sad wet cat of a person standing bare feet in a strom and just crying 'why i was i so blind to my own hubris'#specifically in relation of finally (and far too late) understanding you fucked up a relationship so bad it still hurts years after#if you've ever felt anything remotely similar you know what i'm talking about#and you get why i refuse it being 'in the morning' instead of 'in mourning'#vessel i#vessel#vessel sleep token#vessel fanart#sleep token band#sleeptoken#levynn tries to draw#sleep token#edit: i don't mean to offend those who stand behind the line being 'in the morning' btw i just don't hear it#and i don't think i'm correct. i'm correct for me. not in your stead. half the lyrics can be heard at least two ways#edit2: appearently i'm actually right about something for a change.. a truly unusual turn of events#see comments for referrence pls#also edited this post to the correct lyrics#but leaving the tags for context 'cause thw original version of the post has been rb-d before editing i think
29 notes · View notes
ourceliumnetwork · 6 days ago
Text
Well, once again running into trauma my parents gave me (unfortunately it's most of it) because the Cat That Uncontrollably Eats Plants got in my room to eat the single plant that is in there and got a good chunk of leaf. now he's in Observation and I'm dealing with the actual adrenaline issues instead of the adrenaline dumps i was getting (apparently. learned about what those are today and that explains A LOT ACTUALLY.)
Turns out getting run over by the dog who is at minimum half your size when you're like 6 or 7 and then getting told it's your fault she got out and ran off when there was nothing you could have done to stop her even if you'd known she was going to do that, and being yelled at and told to chase her down on your own is a lot for a small child. The fact that I was on dog catcher duty even when it wasn't "my fault" they got out over the years ever since probably also didn't help.
(quotes on "my fault" to emphasize i'm trying to reframe this at least somewhat in my head as of Right The Fuck Now because this is unhealthy. this is an unhealthy way to live and it will not help any cats in times of crises if my first reaction is to immediately punish myself instead of getting help and also i'm allowed to get help even if I do mess up and it is my fault but this time it super isn't and neither were any of the other times because i wasn't negligent or unobservant i was a child and also the dogs were untrained and also Solaire the cat is a menace who will find plants you didn't even know you had to eat)
#so my wheelchair is coming with me tonight to festivities and that's that#i had been playing with the idea that i would tough it out without but honestly i'll feel better if that's where i get to sit and i don't#have to worry about accidentally taking up someone else's chair#oh shit uhh yeah#this post brought to you by#the very tentative attempt at decorating that left it so my door didn't latch shut behind me while i went to take a shit#and i was gone long enough for an opportunist to shoot his shot and eat the tip off a leaf of Chester the Croton Plant Chreeto#hopefully Agatha was unharmed (she's the spider that lives on Chester's pot)#i decorated chester and that little BASTARD MAN BABY BOY REMORSELESS CRIMINAL moved my decoration out of place#to get at the plant better - it wasn't even in the *way*#i know Chester's supposed to be in dormancy and i was gonna let him get droopy enough to start loosening up his leaves to take off a couple#damaged ones anyway but now i feel bad and the only way i know how to make it up to plans is to give them more water#but he's supposed to be resting so i'm trying to let the guy rest for the winter#hhhhhhhhhhh#okay. i'm. getting a headache from the panic and crying and now i get to go through the cortisol crash i guess fun times fun times i love#i love my POTS flaring up during this time too this has been super fun it's been like a week of nonsense but at least my back doesn't hurt#as bad anymore#i think the amitryptaline (sp?) is at least taking the edge off of the pain so i can function on just the NSAIDs and tylenol#(i got those n-saids and tylenol - got that good something something something rest of the song)
2 notes · View notes
stereax · 5 months ago
Note
saw you post 'listen before you go', thought you'd enjoy this:
oh...
#sterechats :)#going through It. and by It let's just say. the worst loss of my life lol#but I don't think anyone wants to hear how I ruined it again#and how badly I miss them#and if they'd give me one more chance I'd be the happiest person in the world#they put up with so much shit I should never have put them through#I can't blame them for leaving I just wish I could show them how much they mean to me#that behind all of my masks and my anger I cared about them more than anything#and I'm just so damn scared of being vulnerable because I've learned vulnerability is weakness#and even though that's wrong and I know it is it's less vulnerable to close myself off and respond with rage#than it is to actually confront my own emotions and realize that I'm not a robot#that I have feelings and they're usually really big and overwhelming for me#and I have to step back and process these things on my own because it's unfair to others#because I can't keep treating my friends like they're responsible for my emotions and at fault for them#because I need to actually communicate my needs instead of assuming people know them#because these same patterns are why I keep losing friends over and over again#and if I don't fix them I'm never going to be able to maintain a friendship#god. if they're ever going to read this I hope they know how much they mean to me#and how deeply and truly sorry I am for everything I've done#and how I never want to hurt them ever again#and I'm crying again. it feels like all I'm ever doing recently is crying#you know that saying 'you don't realize what you have until it's gone'? yeah.#for all the shit I talked I'd do anything to hear them tell me about their f1 drivers again#I miss them so much it's killing me it feels like#I just. I don't think they're coming back#no matter how much I tell myself they just need a few weeks or months#I think I really fucked it up this time and I don't want to admit it to myself#because I don't think I can mentally accept that they're gone forever most likely#I just want to hope that they'll give me that one last chance and I can prove myself#I just want to talk to them again and it hurts so much
3 notes · View notes
cluescorner · 10 months ago
Text
Started crying over the Batman Beyond Animated Movie concept art. I am so normal.
#do they want my left or right kidney? they can have that one and my appendix as I don't need those to survive#I'm saving my uterus for Silksong if it needs more funding. I'm not gonna use it so might as well.#/j#about selling my organs not about crying over Batman Beyond Animated Movie#I think a Batman Beyond Animated Movie could fix me. Or make me even more autistic about it. probably both.#Batman Beyond is what got me into Batman. it was the only Batman related thing my library had and I thought it looked cool#so I would just watch Batman Beyond for like 5 hours minimum every day during my surgery recovery#so if you're wondering why I am like this...that's why. Batman Beyond did it. it's still my comfort media and i always go back to it#THAT ONE IMAGE OF INQUE CHASING TERRY?? OH MY GOD IT'S SO GORGEOUS#oh my god I am so ordinary and neurotypical#THE FUCKING PRODUCTION DESIGN GUY ON SPIDERVERSE POSTED THEM??#sav eme Batman Beyond Animated Movie#it will fix me I promise#if it is made I will forgive Bruce Timm for his weird thing for Batman x Batgirl.#SPIDERVERSE OF BATMAN MOVIES?? OH MY GOD#Derek Powers on my movie screen#THE SHIT THEY COULD DO WITH SHRIEK??? HOLY FUCK#I hope to god they still have the cold open on old-man Batman (world-weary and brittle-boned) almost shooting somebody in a panic#because THAT is the only compelling reason I have ever seen for Bruce leaving behind the mantle#I love content where its like 'oh when he gets older he becomes the Alfred to a new Batman' or 'he'll retire because Gotham will be better'#but I'll be honest. I do not think Bruce is capable of retirement. I do not think he would ever hang up the mantle willingly#unless he almost became the very kind of person who got his parents killed: a gun-wielding coward. the pain in his eyes.#I could see that. Bruce realizing that he is incapable of being Batman. That he will do more harm for Gotham than good.#if they don't want it to be the opener that's fine. but I want that damn scene.#ajdfl;dksajfl;kjdsfl;kadjskl;fjds Terry my friend Terry on my movie screen#I am going to explode
5 notes · View notes
thornilee013 · 1 year ago
Note
Happy Wednesday!! You haven’t posted for WIP Wednesday yet, so if you’re not doing this week please feel free to ignore this ask! You saying “I am in the states (kind of unfortunately)” cracked me up! I feel the same way oml. I think waiting for those applications will be a good choice! It can be hard to do so many important things all at once and still do them well, so it’s good that you’re prioritizing the things that are more pressing at the moment. I hope moving goes well for you! Also I hope you’re having a good week! 🤍🤍🤍
If WIP Wednesday is happening this week, could I please get some baby Jean? Thank you!!!
prev | Baby Jean | WW 13.12.2023
Jean pouted, already knowing that his chance to explore by himself was gone. His guess was confirmed as his grandfather sighed. "Jean? Would you be okay with joining your sister?"
He could say no. He knew that. But he knew that if he said no, he'd end up with a very whiny little sister, and a disappointed set of grandparents.
"I want Jean to come with me, too!" Camille said, reaching out and grabbing Jean's hand again. "I want to tell him all about the sharks!"
MASTERPOST
2 notes · View notes
randomfusilier · 3 months ago
Text
.
1 note · View note
whumptober · 4 months ago
Text
WHUMPTOBER 2024: PROMPTS LIST
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Welcome to Whumptober 2024 — Seventh Time's a Charm!
Please make sure to read the Event Info and FAQ below carefully, as most of your questions will be answered there already. For everything else, you are welcome to come to our ask box or ask questions in our Discord server here.
This year’s AO3 Collection can be found here.
This year's playlist can be found here.
The 'Anatomy of a Whumptober Prompt' post can be found here.
And our 'Resources for Writing Sensitive Topics' post is here.
We’re very excited to see the community come together for another year of Whumptober! Go wild with the prompts, and support your fellow creators - we wish you all the fun!
Best of luck and happy whumping,
Mods Vanne, Yenn, Kitty and Surro
(Text versions of the prompts, as well as event information, rules and FAQ are posted below the cut!)
Whumptober 2024 Prompt List
No. 1: RACE AGAINST THE CLOCK
Search Party | Panic Attack | "If only we could hold on.” (Icysami x Renegaderr, Strangers.)
No. 2: TRUST ISSUES
Amusement Park | Role Reversal | “You got away with the crime while the knife's in my back.” (Charlotte Sands, Rollercoaster)
No. 3: SET UP FOR FAILURE
Fingerprints | Wrongfully Arrested | "I warned you."
No. 4: HALLUCINATIONS
Hypnosis | Sensory Deprivation | “You're still alive in my head.” (Billy Lockett, More)
No. 5: SUNBURN
Healing Salve | Heatstroke | "If my pain will stretch that far." (Lottery Winners, Burning House)
No. 6: NOT REALISING THEY'RE INJURED
Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms | Healed Wrong | "It's not my blood."
No. 7: ONLY FOR EMERGENCIES
Unconventional Weapon | Magic with a Cost | "It's us or them."
No. 8: SLEEP DEPRIVATION
Isolation Chamber | Forced to Stay Awake | "Leave the lights on." (Coldplay, Midnight)
No. 9: OBSESSION
Broken Window | Bruises | “Frame me up on the wall, just to keep me out of trouble.” (Fall Out Boy, Irresistible)
No. 10: BLOW TO THE HEAD
Slurred Words | Passing Out from Pain | "I can't think straight."
No. 11: SEEING DOUBLE
Convenience Store | Loneliness | “Leave no trace behind, like you don't even exist.” (Taylor Swift, Illicit Affairs)
No. 12: STARVATION
Underground Caverns | Cannibalism | "Just a little more."
No. 13: TEAM AS A FAMILY
Familial Curse | Multiple Whumpees | "Death will do us part." (Set It Off, Partner's In Crime)
No. 14: LEFT FOR DEAD
Hunting Gear | Blackmail | “Because I want you to know what it feels like to be haunted” (tiLLie, kooL aiD mAn)
No. 15: CHILDHOOD TRAUMA
Painful Hug | Moment of Clarity | "I did good, right?"
No. 16: NECROSIS
Swamp | Wound Cleaning | "No, I can't feel anything."
No. 17: NOWHERE ELSE TO GO
Ruined Map | Shipwrecked | "We had a good run."
No. 18: REVENGE
Unreliable Narrator | Loss of Identity | “I see what's mine and take it.” (Panic! at the Disco, Emperor's New Clothes)
No. 19: BLOOD TRAIL
Abandoned Cabin | One Way Out | "Is there anybody alive out there?" (Bruce Springsteen, Radio Nowhere)
No. 20: EMOTIONAL ANGST
Shoulder to Cry On | Giving Permission to Die | "It's not your fault."
No. 21: BODY HORROR
Body Horror | Tattoo Gun | Spirit Possession | “Let the bedsheet soak up the tears.” (Apparat feat. Soap & Skin, Goodbye)
No. 22: BLEEDING THROUGH BANDAGES
Tourniquet | Reopening Wounds | "Oh that's not good."
No. 23: FORCED CHOICE
Public Display | Broken Pedestal | "I'm doing this for you."
No. 24: RADIATION POISONING
Collapsed Building | Equipment Failure | “I never knew daylight could be so violent.” (Florence + The Machine, No Light, No Light)
No. 25: SURGERY
Stitches | Being Monitored | "It's for your own good."
No. 26: NIGHTMARES
Breakfast Table | Parting Words of Regret | “I'm haunted by the lies that I have loved, the actions I have hated.” (Poe, Haunted)
No. 27: VOICELESS
Laboratory | Muzzled | “I have no mouth and I must scream.”
No. 28: DENIAL
CCTV | Exposure | "They caught me red handed."
No. 29: FATIGUE
Labyrinth | Burnout | "Who said you could rest?"
No. 30: RECOVERY
Hospital Bed | Holding Back Tears | "What have I done?"
No. 31: ASKING FOR HELP
Therapy | Making Amends | "I'm alive, I'm just not well." (Elliot Lee, Alive, Not Well.)
Alternatives List:
Body Swap
Communication Barrier
Finding Old Messages
Forgotten
Friendly Fire
Motion Sickness
No-Holds-Barred Beatdown
Regret
Secrets Revealed
Shivering
Survivor's Guilt
Time Loop
Used As Bait
Venom
Vermin
Event Info & Rules
WHUMPTOBER is a month-long, prompt-based creation challenge (think: Inktober, but whumpier). There are 31 official themes this year - one for each day of the month - which can be used, skipped, or combined in any way you’d like. They are meant to serve as inspiration without being taken literally (e.g. you don’t have to include the exact wording of prompts into your work). Feel free to run rampant on interpretation. For example, if the prompt is “flame", you could create something with reference to a candle/campfire, your character could have suffered a burn, or the flame could be a reference to an ‘old flame’ - an old relationship. It’s truly down to you!
In total, there are 4 prompts for each day. These are optional suggestions and can be used in conjunction with the theme, or as options/alternatives.  We want to give everyone as much creative freedom as possible, as well as increase event accessibility for folks with triggers and squicks. There is also a list of 15 alternative prompts that can be subbed in for any day, again to give participants as much creative freedom as possible.
Creators can PRODUCE work in any media they choose, including but not limited to: writing, visual artwork, photo/video/audio edits, paper crafts and elaborate recommendation lists (not just a list of links). Creators can PARTICIPATE as much or as little as they want (i.e. you don’t have to do ALL the prompts if you don’t want to) and prompts can be used in any order. They are also free to use even after the event ends.
When uploading Whumptober content to your blog, be sure to tag it with:
#whumptober2024 …..(the event tag)
#no.1, #no.2, #no.3, …..(theme number)
#bruises, #stabbing, …..(the theme or specific prompt you chose)
#altprompt …..(if you use an altprompt, tag the post with the number of the prompt you replace)
#fandom or #OC, …..(ironman, original content, oc, etc.)
#medium …..(gifs, fic, podcast, art, etc.)
#teeth, #etc …..(trigger warnings & any additional tags. Keep in mind not to add “tw” in front but only use the word/trigger itself)
#nsfwhump …..(only for nsfw content)
#your own tags go here
PLEASE BE DILIGENT WITH YOUR TAGGING. Only properly tagged posts are considered for archiving on the official @whumptober-archive blog. They must be tagged in the order above. An elaborate post about our tagging system can be found [here]
Unfortunately, due to the sheer number of participants in recent years, we cannot guarantee your work will be archived. A random selection of properly tagged posts from all genres will be reblogged each day.
Whumpers who produce content for 31 total theme days are considered event completionists and will be tagged in a masterpost at the end of the month. A form will be published at the beginning of November asking you to tell us if you completed. This is based on trust and we will not check this.
Frequently Asked Questions
Please read this before you send an ask!
TIMELINE
July: Trope voting form released. Late August: Prompt list is released for at least four weeks of preparation time. Tropes cannot be posted earlier than August 25th because of Moderator obligations in real life. (But, you know, go ahead and start writing/drawing, and add the themes in later, if you want!) September: Do as much or as little on your works as you want. You can prepare everything in advance or let September go by with vibes and start working in October. It’s up to you. October 1st: Challenge begins! A storm of whump breaks upon us all! During this time, some posts will be reblogged to the whumptober archive blog. We open the yearly AO3 collection for posting (optional). November 1st: The challenge is officially over! Completionist form opens for those who want to be included in the hall-of-fame. Early November: We release completionist and participant badges, solicit feedback, and post a hall-of-fame list of completionists by the 10th.
PARTICIPATION AND COMPLETION
Q: What counts as participation? Create or continue at least one work inspired by one of this year’s prompts. Q: What counts as completion? Creating work(s) inspired by at least one prompt from each day (or alts), for a total of 31 unique prompts. Q: Do I need to create 31 works? No. You can, if you want. Or you can create one work that you add to every day with a new prompt. Or several works that combine prompts. You can also update an existing work by adding new material with the current prompts. Q: Do I need to post my works somewhere to be a completionist or a participant? No. Q: How do you know I actually completed the challenge? We’ll take your word for it! Q: Do I have to finish my work(s) to be a completionist? No, you can post WIPs. And you’re not obligated to finish them in October, but if you want it to count towards being a completionist, you must have completed 31 prompts by the end of the month. So for example, if you’re writing a long fic and you fit 31 different prompts into the writing you did in October, it’s okay if that fic isn’t finished by the time October ends, you’ll still be a completionist. Q: Is co-writing/illustrating allowed? Yes, absolutely, and it would count towards being a completionist for both/all of you. Q: Is there a min/max limit on word count for written works? No. Q: Is there a min/max limit of quality for art? No. Q: Do I have to do something each day to be a completionist? No. You can skip days whenever you want, and as long as 31 daily prompts (or alts) are in your works done in October, you can be a completionist. For example, if you wrote a 1000-word ficlet that covers prompts in days 2, 3, and 17, you can check all three days off your list even though it’s only one work. Q: Is this challenge just for fics? No! Artworks, GIFsets, headcannons, rec lists, poetry, moodboards, or any other creative work is encouraged. Q: Can I combine Whumptober with other creation challenges? Absolutely, as long as the other challenges allow it too.
PROMPTS
Q: How do the prompts work? There are FOUR prompts per day: a theme and three ideas. You can use one, two, three, or all four prompts for each day. If you don’t like any of the daily prompts, you can substitute one of the ALT prompts instead. Q: How strictly/literally should we interpret the prompts? As literally or as figuratively as you want. For example, if the theme is WATER, that could mean drowning, waterboarding, raining, swimming, take place underwater, be lost at sea, construct a metaphor about a character’s mood that changes like a flowing river, crying, or whatever else you can think of that fits that theme. Q: Can I combine prompts? Is there a limit on how many? No limit and combine as many as you’d like. If you create a work that checks off multiple prompts, that work will count for a fill of multiple prompts. You need to address 31 different prompts to be an official completionist, but you don’t have to produce 31 separate works.
WORKS
Q: What’s whump? Hurting a character, whether that’s physically, emotionally, intellectually, psychologically, or any other way you can think of. Comfort afterwards is optional. Angst is emotional whump, so it counts. Q: How do I know if it’s whumpy enough? If your character is just mildly inconvenienced, it probably needs more whump. However, no participant has to prove whumpiness to the mods. Whatever you write is up to you. Q: What kind of characters can I create for? Anything. Generic “whumpee,” OC, PC, NPC, major characters, minor characters, or whatever you want. There are no limits. Q: Does it have to take place in a specific fandom? No, you can create works for your own worlds or for fandoms or for both. You can also create more generic or pan-fandom works. You can do cross-overs or use OCs, whatever you want. Q: Can I create AI-created works? We will not reblog or promote any works we know to be generative AI-created. Q: Is there anything we’re not allowed to write? As long as it contains whump and is based on our prompts, it’s fine. Please courtesy tag your works if you post them so people who follow the #whumptober2024 tag can filter according to their preferences. Q: What about sex, minor characters, and potentially disturbing content? You can create whatever works are legal in your country and post them accordingly. Please courtesy tag anything you think might be objectionable if you post to Tumblr so people who follow the #whumptober2024 tag can filter according to their preferences.
POSTING
Q: Where can I post my work? Post where and how you want. You don’t even have to (cross)post it to Tumblr. Just keep in mind if it’s not on Tumblr we will not be able to add it to the blog archive. There is an AO3 archive for Whumptober 2024, as well as the parent collection for works completed outside of the event. Q: Can I start posting early? You can, but this is an October event and wouldn’t it be more fun with everyone doing it at the same time? We won’t be reblogging any work predating October 1st. Q: Can I post late? Yes. For the sake of our hardworking Post Fairies, only a day’s themes will be reblogged to @whumptober-archive each day of October. But you can post whenever. Some of us are still working on and posting Whumptober fics from years ago. Q: Do I have to use your tags? Only on Tumblr and only if you want us to reblog your work on @whumptober-archive. Q: How do I have my works reblogged to the archive? Properly tagged posts will be reblogged to @whumptober-archive. If you want the official archive blog to reblog you, post on Tumblr and tag correctly (see this FAQ link for more info on tagging). Please note not all posts will be reblogged each day. Q: Can we @ you? For questions and comments, of course. We’ll be getting a flood of notifications, so if you really want us to see something send an ask. Q: Can I cross post on other blogs? Yes, multiple platforms and blogs are perfectly acceptable, as long as they allow cross-posting (to us). You can also post different works to different accounts under different names, without posting them everywhere at once. If you post some works under your main and others under an alt blog, that’s fine for completionist purposes. Q: Can I upload/repost my Whumptober content to other social media platforms? Of course! We’ve created an AO3 Collection to archive any fics posted there, which can be found here. The blog is the official archive, so please respect the personal boundaries of any whumpers in your social circle (don’t out anyone as a participant who would prefer not to be outed).
Most importantly, have fun, create, and enjoy all the whump posted this October!
9K notes · View notes
lolo-chi · 9 months ago
Text
What a truly shitty week
0 notes
kilibaggins · 9 months ago
Text
/ rant. suicidal thoughts and self hate warning be safe
#vent post#tw sui ideation#suicidal ideation#suicidal thoughts#hopefully those tags dont get this post in trouble or something idk I'm trying to be helpful#self hate#tw self hate#i hate myself and everything i've done in the past and everything I do now and it reminds me I do not deserve to exist. i keep being a bad#person no matter how hard i dont want to be. i keep doing gross or bad things. i hate everything I've done in the past. i hate everything#i wish i could just go back and change every little thing ever. i want to change who I am fundamentally. i want to FIX myself I want to era#everything in the past i need it all gone I need to be happy and to be CLEAN and to be a good person. i need to be able to deserve to be he#*here but no matter how hard i try and no matter what I do I'm always ging to hate myself for what I've done and what I'm doing.#i dont treat people correctly i dont take care of things the way I should my room is a absolute mess no matter how many times my mom#begs me to keep it clean i never do what im supposed to do i start things and give up after FIVE DAYS i hurt people i screw up all the time#im just so tired of it all and it makes me not want to exist. i know I wont do anything about it because realistically I want to experience#the good things in life and i don't want to leave the good people behind but I know they'd hate me if they knew everything about me#and i know i dont DESERVE the good things so I'm just here suffering and crying because I'm just bad.
1 note · View note
binnie · 11 months ago
Text
I feel so alone
1 note · View note