#'but kit u do that on every blog'

[egrets-not-regrets]

Paperweight

Inspired by a discord conversation about businessman Guilliman being mean and stepping on his little secretary who is picking up papers on the ground.

Author’s Note: TW: Dubcon, humiliation, power imbalance, slight smut. Modern AU CEO Roboute Guilliman. Honestly this could apply to a few other primarchs.

Tagged: @shadowfirecat , @kit-williams , @bleedingichorhearts , @barn-anon , @gallifreyianrosearkytiorsusan

@sleepyfan-blog , @bispecsual , @c-u-c-koo-4-40k , @ms--lobotomy , @whorety-k

@gra93fruit-blog , @i-am-a-dragon34 , @felinisnoctis, @thevoidscreams, @yurihasurunbara

“I’m sorry, Mr. Guilliman, sir.” You whimpered looking at his icy blue eyes, licking your dry lips nervously. Then looked down at the scatter of paper and folders on the ground.

The imposing businessman tsk-ed with annoyance, “You clumsy slut. Go fetch.” his deep commanding voice ordered. You blushed, embarrassed, being humiliated like this was not part of your job description, but this was not the first time he did this. Besides, who would believe you should you complain? Which other job would pay this much for the work you do? You just graduated and still have to pay back your student loans. You suppose you should count your lucky stars that the ceo of McCragge Financial Co. did not decide to humiliate you in public instead.

“Yes, Mr…” his brow rose. You paused, then correcting yourself, “Yes, sir…” you whispered. Tugging down the hem of your short skirt (too short) uneasily as you bent down in front of him to gather the fallen documents.

You shuddered feeling heat rushing down your chest. You could feel Mr. Guilliman’s eyes on you, roving over every inch of your figure, finally settling on the curves of your as confined in the tight little skirt you wore. It wasn’t your choice of clothes, but it was one of the many outfits that Mr. Guilliman bought, and insisted that you wear to work. “Work uniform” he said, “You need to look professional and neat.”

A sudden boot to your ass knocked you out of your thoughts and down onto your hands and knees. Trembling, you looked up at him, your glasses askew.

The cloth of his dress shirt stretched tightly across his muscled chest as he let out an impatient growl. You couldn’t help the shiver that ran down your spine, “Hurry up. What did I hire you for? To be a glorified paperweight?”

Rubbing your thighs together unconsciously, you replied meekly, “No, sir. Sorry, sir.” Your gaze dropped back to the floor, face flushed, doing your best to gather the paper on the ground. Your short skirt slowly rode up your ass as you crawled around to gather the documents. It was impossible to ignore the heat welling between your legs as Guilliman’s leer intensified.

You were about to get up once you organized the papers again when you felt the heavy pressure of the ceo’s foot on hands pinning you to the floor. You winced, “Mr. Guilliman?”

You whined feeling the pressure of his leather shoe creak against your hands. Afraid of having your hands broken, you quickly addressed him properly, “Sir?”

You sighed in relief as Guilliman moved his foot to your lower back, keeping you down on your hands and knees.

“Stay down.” he ordered. You obediently did as he asked.

He hummed thoughtfully as his foot teased your skirt up, exposing your silk-covered cunt. You had worn that pair of blue silk panties wanting to feel a little fancy. You whimpered, feeling the leather tip of his shoe teasingly rubbing up and down your slit, despairing when you feel your arousal spreading between your inner thighs. The silk panties couldn’t hide that now. You trembled and stuttered, “S… S… Sir…?”

Guilliman chuckled, pressing the tip of his foot harder, seeing the darkening damp patch on the blue silk “Maybe I should add ‘glorified paperweight’ to your resume. Seems like you like it enough.”

[gallifreyianrosearkytiorsusan]

Tell Me

Past =-= Next

Author's note: Karlsor's next part in Husbandry

Summary: Since he's Chaos Aligned (he'd like to argue that's grox-shit) and Not Very Chaos Twisted/mutated, he gets the dubious pleasure of being in Public Relations. (Since when do they have/need Public relations?!) Karlsor would like a refund. This is a shitty duty shift and he hates it a lot.

Warnings: Swearing. Let me know if I need to add anything.

Tagged: @barn-anon, @bleedingichorhearts, @c-u-c-koo-4-40k, @egrets-not-regrets, @kit-williams,

Tagged continued: @sleepyfan-blog, @whorety-k, @ms--lobotomy @bispecsual @thevoidscreams

Tagged continued: @i-am-a-dragon34, @gra93fruit-blog

After following after the totally-not-scary Death Guard Apothecary Hura, and getting more explanations from his fellow Night Lords about Everything. And how Hura wasn't blowing smoke up his ass, that they really are on Ancient Terra, the information starts to sink in.

Much to his dismay, he has to be checked over by an Apothecary, and isn't it oh so convenient that Hura is right there to assess his health and what he might need. He begrudgingly allows the smug fucker to tend to him. He's given a relatively clean bill of health, which is fan-fucking-tastic.

He's sent off to the training salles to see what he's good at and other sorts of boring as testing to see where he'd fit in with the others on base for duty shifts and what not. New Postings, especially ones where your file isn't there for the Command to read, or has your current Command with you is such a pain in the fucking ass.

Some of these Chaos Fuckers are really fucking ugly to look at. And sometimes staring at some of the truly twisted one's hurts is brain, and he does his best not to look at them too much. To his greatest displeasure, he's supposedly going to be one of the more "front facing" of the Chaos Astartes in this base.

When he demanded why he had to do such an Ultramarine Fucker Job, it was said that since he lacked Chaos Mutations, among other things. He pointed out sourly that he's a fucking Night Lord and he's not an Officer, nor does he particularly care about being nicey-nice. He's not trained for it and he doesn't want to do such a shitty as job.

He Challenges the fuckers and loses. So, he has to do the shitty ass grox-shit ultramarine job of "public relations". Throne above! It makes his skin break out into hives as he scowls and stomps after the other poor bastards that were suckered into this job. He doesn't care to listen to what the Ultramarines, and other uppity fuckers say about some thing or other.

God, he hates briefing meetings. They drone on, and on, and on. Or they got interesting when Father went bug-fuck nuts and started killing people. Or one of the High Raptor Lords got stabby and then everyone was every man for themselves and trying Not To Die from The Command going bug-fuck nuts.

He rubs his face and groans a little. He's got the Curse of the Eighth quite strongly. Psyker... and trained at that. With wretched Future Sight which only ever showed him the most miserable and fucked up shit that made sleeping so hard. The Ultramarines are droning on and on and fucking on. He didn't mean to close his eyes, but he had, he's listening, but the power point presentation with the bright fucking lights is hurting his dark-adapted eyes something fierce.

He's got a fucking migraine that makes light feel like poisons and acid that drip into his eyes and across his skin. Sinking in like fire burning a corpse. He punches the asshole that jabs his side as he hisses at his fellow 'chaos' astartes that he's not asleep, he's listening to the fucker talk about some-random-grox shit that he doesn't particularly care about.

If it was truly important his Sight would be screeching at him about the danger levels. He does like that his Sight has gone mostly quiet and still. He's been able to sleep a lot better... sort of. He doesn't trust any of the fuckers in the base worth a damn, but even with how limited sleep an Astartes need, they do still need sleep.

He'd never thought he'd have to do public relations because 1) He's a fucking Night Lord. 2) He's 'pretty'. Which makes him cackle. No, he's no Blood Angel or Emperor's child. He's a survivor of Nostramo, and he's got the looks to prove it. Sickly pale skin, night dark eyes, and greasy-looking black hair that he keeps short. Also, he's got scars from previous battles that go all over his body. A few on his face, scratching up his features to make him even scarier to most base lines.

And yet, despite all that and the fact that he's a trained Psyker of the Eighth legion (which means, he knows that they think he's bug-fuck nuts) he's to be one of the front facing dip shits because he needs less warp fuckery to make it so he's more Normal and Shinier compared to others in the base... Given what he's seen of them, he can't argue as much after he sees just how twisted or 'blessed' some of those nightmare-inducing shit heads are. He still tries to argue and bitch his way out of the shit duty shift. Not that the fuckers listen to him.

He remembers hearing of one of his fellow fuckers in the Eighth legion being tortured by getting stuck in a room with bright lights constantly. For days. Throne, that sounds like a really shitty way to torture someone, especially since it didn’t cause any, or much suffering for anyone else. His hands clench into fists and then he relaxes them a bit. He wishes he could put his helmet back on as that would help filter out the light. But nooo he had to show ‘trust’ or whatever fucking grox shit the others had said… Also because he was one of the few ass holes in the Chaos Base that could take of his helmet… and all of his armor.

He wonders what sort of fucked up shit happened that being fused to ones armor did. Sounded… Horrifying, yet also comforting? Armor is a part of you. It protects the squishy bits and is almost like a second skin. He cracks open one of his eyes a sliver and notices when some base line humans show up and start chittering at them and he mentally groans about how this meeting keeps continuing on until fucking eternity. The human pauses as the Ultramarine translate what they says. Fucking perfect, until the little human stops their speech, which is going to make this at least twice as long because translation makes things so much fucking slower.

One of the other humans approaches him, which has him turn and squint down at them, and give a razor sharp grin filled with teeth as he flexes his hands. The talk at him in that same language the other human was speaking and had slowly pulled out something in a box. Which has him growling a little at them. They freeze in their movements and the eyes of all of his cousins are on him as the human unfreezes with an insulting swiftness as they open the box and he sees astartes sized strange looking google things. They were tinted, they gestured at them and then up at him.

He scowls at the room and back down at the human, slowly grabbing the goggles he puts them on and tries not to collapse into a pile of relief. Almost wanting to cry at how much better he feels now that the dreaded, hateful, cruel light is now mostly blocked because of these tinted goggles. Humans calls it “Sun Goggles.”

“Thank you,” He says to them, he means it to. He is not going to give these back and will kill someone to keep them. Multiple even.

[bonefall]

Tbh I reread DotC in late 2022/early 2023 (I legitimately can't remember) and it struck me how awful Gray Wing was a lot of the time?

And like I found no one talking about it on Twitter, I felt like I had read I different series when people talked about how kind and perfect he was all the time (don't get me wrong, he has his moments, but it seemed like everyone ignored or forgot the bad).

Anyway, I came on Tumblr and I found your blog, and it has made me feel sane again, so I would really just like to thank you for that :)

Not to mention everything else you do on your blog, I love your au so much and how you're willing to go to bat for disabled and wronged woman characters. I look forward to every post :)

Thank u <3

Yeah Gray Wing is so... he's such an uncomfortable character, to me. I hate the way they basically use him to do Clear Sky apologia for the entire series, EXCEPT for when they need to zoom in on how much terrible pain and sadness Gray Wing is in for being Such A Nice Dude.

He's both a bully and a victim in the worst possible way. He'll get shoved around and insulted by Clear Sky and then immediately downplay how violent and shitty his brother is, and then say that Bumble was too fat to escape domestic abuse while commenting on how her death is sad even though he didn't like her. He's oblivious to any of the actual feelings of his four romantic interests, and then gets several chapters for man pain after the writers kill off three of them.

And the WORST is his parenting... They're desperately trying to stress how amazing and sweet and perfect Gray Wing is (even though he's not) for taking care of all these kids who are not his; but the CHILDREN don't return that affection. The MOMENT Turtle's kits know that he didn't knock up their mother, it's Tom, Tom, Tom.

I feel like "unrequited parental affection" is one of the most bizarrely uncomfortable things I can imagine, and yet, that's what they want for Gray Wing. They want to show how sad it is that he's so so full of love, and he doesn't really get it back. Baffling.

So, welcome! We serve Gray Wing Dislike here.

[riddlerosehearts]

i found ur blog recently after becoming incredibly infatuated with twst but specifically idia shroud (my friends said i act like him to an uncanny level and they were absolutely right...) and i love your vilidia posts dearly. ok that's it thank u

OMG that's so awesome, welcome to the twst fandom and congrats on having such fantastic taste in characters and ships lol!! i adore vilidia (obviously, if my whole vilidia tag is any indication) but i haven't posted about them in so long, i hope you don't mind if i use your ask as an excuse to share some silly little headcanons that i don't believe i've posted before:

so i think that when vil was like, 10 or so, his dad tried to encourage his love of potion-making by getting him one of those candy chemistry kits. the ones that come in super cute colorful boxes and teach you how to make things like exploding pop rocks and glow-in-the-dark gummies while explaining the science behind it. (here's a picture of basically the exact thing i'm thinking of.) but vil, poor sweet little vil who'd already let the brutality of the entertainment industry make him believe that he needed to be absolutely perfect, just rolled his eyes and said he was too old for that stuff and that all of that candy wouldn't be good for him anyway. he never once touched the kit, even though part of him probably did really want to.

and i also think that at some point, after he and idia had started dating, idia bought one of those same kits online and just barely mustered up the courage to ask vil if he'd like to join him and ortho in making some of the candy. he claimed the entire thing was ortho's idea, but vil could tell that idia really wanted them to do this together and he decided it'd be okay to indulge his boyfriend just once. as he actually made the candy he realized that although it obviously didn't teach him a single thing he didn't already know, it was still a lot of fun and he wished he hadn't rejected things like that as a kid.

also, speaking of chemistry, there's a voice line in-game where idia implies that he is not good at it. so while i think he and vil would be fascinated by each other's different fields of scientific interest and would love talking about it together i also think that one day idia just very overdramatically goes like: "omg i'm doing soooooo bad in my chemistry classes... if only some super smart and kind and very attractive person would help me out..."

and vil responds by telling idia that he most certainly does not share his younger brother's talent as an actor. but he agrees to help anyway and then they have cute study dates.

idia's habit of starting to excitedly infodump about his interests only to suddenly get embarrassed and stop persists for a while into his relationship with vil but every single time it happens, vil encourages idia to keep going. he often says things like "oh, are you done already? that's a shame, i was so looking forward to hearing more about sora's journey to save kairi". it takes a long time but eventually idia gets to a point where he's so comfortable around vil that he doesn't feel embarrassed anymore.

[itz-bow-xd]

OMG ITS ON!! COOLNESS!!!

hey guyz its bow!! :3 im from inanimate insanitys first season! it was like so kewl!! had lots of fun bsidez the box they put me in but WE DONT TALK ABT THAT XD

i found this phone on the ground,, ummm idk whos it was but its mine now :p

i made this blog so u can all like send sum askz!! dont be shy! i dont bite,,, not usually >:)

sooo like yea!! send me sum askz! WAIT I SAID THAT ALREADY LOLLL

---

tags of interest:

#bow chats: bow answering asks or reblog rps and stuff of the sorts

#misc asks: no specific plot related to the ask

#bow theories: theorize about bow!!

#light of abundance arc: a crk arc hehehe funny

#mod kit: thats me!

---

hey guys its the mod! (she/any) few things i wanna let yall know rq

-bows typing is inconsistent- like she may type one way and type another way some other time idk i dont make the rules 💅 (this doesnt apply to the light of abundance arc, which she talks instead of types and uses full grammar for uhh LORE reasons yahooo)

-the art style may change- im tryna do lasso art but im new to it and ill probably change stuff at random

-this takes place after season 3! (yea theres a reason shes not a ghost UGH... im always on that lore grind💪💪💪)

-any asks are chill except nsfw, pro ships, fetish-y stuff, politics, unironic hate towards anyone, heavy vents (lighter vents are fine. im willing to listen! just pls nothing that could possibly trigger someone else)

-magic anons are cool lol. but i highly request that for every m!a you send, you also send a non m!a to balance it out

-wont feature any ships on this blog myself but i dont mind asks or jokes about shipping bow! just no illegal or problematic ones

-have patience when i answer asks pls 🙏🙏🙏 i work as a full time procrastinator and i already have another ask blog WHYD I MAKE THIS ONE LMAOOOO

-have a fun time !!!!

[anika-ann]

Protect and Serve - Pt.1

Ch1: The Meet and the Cute

Type: multichapter, Teen Wolf post s06-A, slight AU

Pairing: Jordan Parrish x reader  Word count ch1: 2600

Summary: In a need of change of scenery for a while, you stabbed your finger into a map and ended up heading to Beacon Hills to start anew. You cared little for obscure blog posts claiming the town had a reputation – house prices were a miracle and there was a job opening at local high school.

And if the population was half as nice and pretty as certain Deputy patrolling the streets, you were going to be just fine. ...right?

Warnings: fluff and cutesy, cops?, serial killer mention, language

A/N: Title (besides from the obvious) from s05e09: “I'm a very good deputy, and I'd like to stay that way. Flipping over jeeps and attacking colleagues doesn't exactly fit with protect and serve.” (J.P.)

A/N2: not sure anyone will even read this since it’s kinda niche AND so late to the party but... ah well. Was itching to write this. There’s not enough JP x reader out there. Divider by firefly-graphics

One glance – that was all it took. Just one glance and all hope was lost at last, even as you knew the end was long time coming.

“No! No, no, nooooo,” you whined, watching the screen turn dark, the company logo flickering up once more before your phone died completely, your gaze snapping back to the road. “Dammit!”

Scanning your surroundings, you found the nearest place to stop – a simple task, truly, since Beacon County was apparently nothing but woods – and pulled over, killing the engine.

You deserved this; you knew that. That’s what you got for postponing basic things like buying a new charging cable – something you had meant to do weeks ago. But between packing, filling in a mountain of paperwork, calls with Mrs. Martin and goodbyes to your few friends, you felt too exhausted to do a single piece of work extra. Such as purchasing a silly piece of electronics.

It was karma, really. Bitchy karma who left you with Beacon Hills at your fingertips and a dead GPS. It wasn’t that you hadn’t looked up the map of the place before; you just succumbed to the sin of modern times and didn’t care much to actually remember where the school was in position to your new home, relying on a piece of technology instead.

It was the cop’s fault anyway. Your phone was supposed to last, you should have already been in Beacon Hills, waiting for the appointment with Principal Martin, but apparently the Beacon County Sherriff’s department was taking their job a little too seriously when directing traffic. Deputy Whatshisname had held you up too long when checking the papers, making you blow into the stupid breathalyser and walk a straight line despite your reassurances that you had not been drinking and driving. He just had to check your first aid kit and other obligatory equipment too; and now your phone was useless. You hoped karma was about to bite Mr.Deuty in the ass too.

“No use crying now…” you muttered under your breath, cursing when you realized you couldn’t even call your future boss and apologize for probably being late.

Plugging your phone in, toying with the pitiful excuse of a cable for a bit, you slowly started the car again, mentally crossed your fingers and hoped for the best.

You reached Beacon Hills in barely two minutes with no problems – it was the town itself which posed a challenge.

Half past eleven in the morning, the roads were nearly free of cars. A good thing, truly, because with how slow you were going, eyes sharp as your gaze trailed over every sign, trying to spy names of the streets and hoping for something to spark a memory, you might encounter some serious road rage of other drivers otherwise.

Instinctively, you tried to head towards the town centre, sure you were doing a decent job, until you found yourself on the edge of the town again, quickly making a U-turn and heading back.

Maybe the blog posts were right about this town: there was something strange going on. Maybe it was a labyrinth. Maybe it was like a Bermuda triangle. Hell, maybe it didn’t even exist in the same realm as the rest of the world, floating in some parallel universe-

You scoffed and eyed your watch. You were already late. You might as well stop by the coffee shop you had passed five minutes ago – if you’d be able to find it again. Maybe there would be someone with a functioning charging cable willing to lend it for a small coffee and cheesecake bribe too.

Resigned, you added coffee shops and bakeries to list of things to keep an eye out for as you slowly followed the road, watching people on their lunch break filling the streets. You really didn’t want to stop and ask for directions like an idiot, but you promised yourself that unless you found your way in the next three minutes, you-

The sudden blare of a police siren made you jump in your seat, dull pain in your chest following the startle in your heart. Jesus. Before you could try to find the source, the red and blue flashed in the corner of your eyes in your rear-view mirror.

Along with the flashing sign asking you to stop.

“You’ve got to be kidding me.”

This wasn’t karma toying with you anymore. This was God’s fucking punishment.

And the Beacon County Sherriff’s department definitely already hated you.

With a sigh, you pulled over at the nearest opening, grateful for the siren instantly falling silent, quickly followed by the flashing lights dying out as the door of the police car opened.

Fine. Fine. So you’d have your papers checked twice in one day, whatever. But you swore if they would test you for alcohol again, you’d throw a fit. It was already midday. You were supposed to be at the school at the moment and you would have, hadn’t it been for the self-important prick in uniform you encountered less than an hour ago.

You pulled your window down and dug into your glove compartment in search of the documents for the second time that day, throwing them on the passenger seat. Looking for your driver’s licence next as you heard the officer stop by your door, you started talking, willing yourself to be nice despite the world not returning the favour today.

“Okay, officer, I’m sorry and I mean no disrespect, but could we deal with this really fast? I swear I have been pulled over for checking papers two towns over, breathalyser and walking included, and I know for a fact that I haven’t done anything wrong now and I was most definitely not speeding, so please just let me show you the papers and we’ll be on our way, because I’m already late, okay?” you blurted out in one breath, finally finding your prize.

Ha!

“Ma’am.”

The police officer addressed you with a surprisingly low level of irritation in his voice, but you felt a pang of shame anyway as you gathered all the documents.  

“I’m sorry, that was rude, but it was also the truth and it would really help me, so here-“

The moment you turned to hand your papers to the poor man who was just doing his job and looked up, your brain came to a screeching halt – and refused to work in anything but simple short sentences.

Oh. He’s young.

Oh, he’s pretty.

Oh god, he needs a bigger uniform. The sleeves are definitely too tight. His arms-

Speaking of arms. And shoulders. He had a patch on the uniform. He wasn’t an officer. He was with the Sherriff’s department, after all. He was a Deputy.

A really, really handsome deputy.

With a light-brown ruffled hair and cute wrinkle between his brows as his bright green eyes roamed your face with misplaced but entirely genuine concern, the corners of his lips lifted in a careful but friendly smile.

You were fucked. You would also like to be fucked. By him. He could use the handcuffs that were no doubt fastened on the back of his belt if he wanted. On you or on him. No preference. Jesus. Your mind was definitely not supposed to head into the gutter so fast, but here you were.

This must have been karma paying you back for your grief. She sent Deputy Parrish to make your day better. You didn’t know whether to climb him like a tree or pinch his cheek first – that was how attractive and absolutely entirely cute he was. Especially when he frowned a little harder.

Be still my foolish heart.

“Ma’am? Are you okay?”

“Yes! Sir.” you blurted out, letting go of the papers at last. “I’m fine.”

And so are you.

You couldn’t believe he was addressing you as ma’am. Then again, you couldn’t believe you just called him Sir. You needed to get a grip.

On him, your brain helpfully supplied and even as you completely agreed, you willed to remind yourself you were an adult and not a screeching horny teenager. Which was slightly difficult since the Deputy’s lips curled up in an easy smile.

“Good. And you’re right, you weren’t speeding,” he assured you, completely ignoring the documents you handed him, eyes firmly on yours.

They really were pretty. But momentarily not enough to distract you from what he said. Go adulthood.

“I’m pretty sure I was going on a snail pace.”

“Exactly,” he confirmed, his smile growing along with your bewilderment.

He wasn’t checking your papers, still. He didn’t pull you over because you were speeding – quite the opposite, it seemed. Huh? What were you missing? It was your turn to frown.

“…you pulled me over because I was going too slow?” you asked, slowly, pondering over every syllable, because even as you said it, it made no damn sense.

“Yes-“

“But this isn’t a free-way! There’s no limit, is there?” you questioned. Wait, was there? Was that a California thing? A Beacon County thing you failed to research? “...I probably shouldn’t admit to this, but I’m so very confused right now.”

The Deputy – Parrish, his nametag read – chuckled, flashing a perfect white line of teeth in the process, his left eyebrow arching almost playfully.

“Don’t worry, you didn’t do anything wrong. I just don’t remember seeing your car around before and given the fact you were on the opposite end of the speed limit, I was wondering if you needed any help?”

Your confusion hit an entirely new limit. You understood every word he said, but it seemed like they made no sense whatsoever when woven together like this. You blinked several times, but the image of a handsome and apparently an overly helpful deputy didn’t disappear. Not even when you tilted your head. Weird.

“…you pulled me over because I looked lost and you thought I might need help…?”

He grimaced, even as the amiability still shone from his eyes. “It does sound pretty strange now that I think of it, doesn’t it?”

It did.

It also probably sounded a little creepy.

And maybe it should scare you, especially since the guy was a pretty face – a devil with a face of an angel, you heard all about those, the charming serial killers – but something told you that you could trust him. If not for the strangely intense gut feeling telling you this guy did not have a single mean bone in his body, then for the fact that there was another person in the car waiting for him. Surely, they couldn’t both be serial killers. Right?

And there were a few people around who could be potential witnesses in case these two planned to Ted-Bundy you in the nearby woods, so you were going to be fine.

But mostly, Deputy Parrish was emitting such a warm and kind aura, with his boyish smile – a little self-deprecating now, bless his heart – making his bright green irises crinkle, that you simply couldn’t but trust him.

You hoped it wouldn’t bite you in the ass. Though you’d have nothing against him biting-

You cleared your throat.

“A little…” you admitted at last, a smile spreading your lips as well as the tips of his ears seemed to grow slightly red, “but truth to be told, I am lost and you look like the kind of a cop who’s really dedicated to the whole ‘protect and serve’ thing, Deputy Parrish. So… thanks for the care, I guess.”

“All the same.” He gave you back your documents without sparing them a single glance, his free hands now occupied by resting on his belt. “Where you headed?”

High school. The simple and most adequate answer was high school. But the sincerely curious tone in Mr. Handsome Deputy’s voice just flipped a switch in your brain, leading you to share way more than necessary.

“Uhm… I have meeting with the principal of local high school. I’m gonna teach there, starting next week. English and Spanish.”

“Oh! Welcome then,” he greeted you warmly, seemingly pleased by that information for some reason. “High school’s easy enough. Just follow us.”

Your eyebrows shot up in surprise. He was joking, right?

He did not look like he was joking.

In fact, he seemed perfectly relaxed – even if still standing tall, shoulders squared -, the easy smile still on his lips, he reciprocated your gaze with more patience than you probably deserved.

Instinctively, you looked over your shoulder, finding the Deputy’s companion waiting in the car, playing with his phone. From the distance, he appeared completely unbothered by the world around him.

“Miss?”

You head snapped back to Deputy Parrish, not missing his slightly amused tone or the change in addressing. One corner of his lips lifted, you noticed he was slightly leaned forward to you. If you had even a little bit higher opinion of yourself, you’d say he was flirting. And he was on the job – a job he clearly took very seriously. Definitely not flirting. Right?

“But you-- he… really?”

“Yes.”

Well. That actually sounded great. Lord knew you were already spectacularly late. You’d take your chance – as surreal as this whole encounter had been so far; you might as well make the most of it. Especially with a willing and maybe flirty eye-candy like Deputy Parrish.

Leaning onto the frame of the window, you gazed up at the man, eyes narrowing in playful suspicion.

“Is this a trick? Are you actually arresting me? I mean… surely you have better things to do than help a teacher with a dead GPS find her way...?”

His gaze flickered to the console to your phone and the excuse of a charger, the root of all trouble – trouble you were barely worried about momentarily, since he gave you a sympathetic smile.

“I promise we’re not arresting you. The school’s less than ten minutes away. It’s no trouble, really,” he said, shrugging it off.

The choice was easy then – with one little detail.

“Thank you… but you will not turn on the siren, right? And the flashing lights?” you pleaded, only half-joking. He quirked one corner of his lips. “‘Cause I would never get away with telling the class to be quiet if I make that much noise just arriving at school for the first time.”

You were well-aware it was past midday – but you’d swear that when the man laughed, because of something you said with an intention to make him laugh, the sun only had just finally come out. It was a blinding sight; and your smile widened of its own volition at the joyful sound.

“I will not turn on the lights nor the siren and I’ll stop a few streets over so you don’t make a spectacle on your first day,” he promised, still chuckling, so absurdly sunshine-like you truly were tempted to put your sunglasses on. And maybe a facial mask to hide just how hot your face felt under his appreciative gaze.

“Bless you, Deputy.”

“Hey, it’s protect and serve, right?” he echoed your earlier words, grinning.

For some inexplicable reason, the best reaction you came up as he was turning to leave was to mimic a salute.

You groaned in embarrassment as soon as you believed him to be out of earshot and sight – but still, you were sensible enough to check the side mirror to catch a glimpse of him leaving.

You were not disappointed. The sleeves were not the only part of his attire that was a little snug. Bless the Deputy, indeed.

As you eventually pulled up at the school parking lot, the police car disappearing in the distance, you found yourself still smiling wide despite regretting some of your choices; the memory of the attractive Deputy fresh in your mind, you couldn’t help but feeling an imprint on your heart too, his wholesome persona and contagious smile leaving you giddy and ready to face your fresh start.

Even if you were a little late for it.

Next part // Series masterlist // Complete masterlist

Thank you for reading 💕

As I mentioned, this is probably going to be pretty niche, so perhaps more than ever, I’ll be happy for any comments/reblogs - we breathe for interaction here ✨ 

[saintmeghanmarkle]

Chanel Slingbacks Cartier Love Bracelet: Meghans Luxury Starter Kit is Stuck in 2015 by u/tinasparkl

Chanel Slingbacks, Cartier Love Bracelet: Meghan’s Luxury Starter Kit is Stuck in 2015 The Chanel Slingbacks and Cartier Love bracelet she sports so proudly are basically part of an influencer’s luxury starter kit from 2015. The Cartier nail “Juste en clou” necklace is also a starter piece in bracelet form from the same time period. Every “luxury influencer” from 2015-2017 promoted these pieces ad nauseam to the point that now they are seen as so trite and basic. Sure you can argue that the slingbacks are classics, but all I can see are influencers from 2015 wearing them with frayed hem cropped jeans. Look at what actual style icons are wearing today and it’s just not this. Today it’s about having unique pieces that other people don’t have and having a style signature. Gwyneth is a great example of a middle aged woman with money with effortless style. Meghan can’t do this, because she’s still trying so hard to “look 2015 rich” that she doesn’t understand that the times have passed her by. I’m sure she thinks she’s wearing “classics” but it all looks so dated worn altogether. She has the money to buy unique clothing and jewelry, but she’s so insecure that she relies on these labels to show she’s “made it.” No offense to anyone who has these pieces. It’s not about the items themselves, it’s how Meghan wears them in an attempt to look rich when she’s at a point in her “charitable work” that downplaying this stuff would look better from both a style and optics perspective. You married into the oldest blue blooded family in the world, only to sport a Cartier Love bracelet. Girl, get a clue. post link: https://ift.tt/jxCyeUn author: tinasparkl submitted: August 17, 2024 at 08:10PM via SaintMeghanMarkle on Reddit disclaimer: all views + opinions expressed by the author of this post, as well as any comments and reblogs, are solely the author's own; they do not necessarily reflect the views of the administrator of this Tumblr blog. For entertainment only.

[heychucklenuts]

Rules Post and Get to Know Me Better

Mixed bag here, y'all learn the rules and learn about me.

About me first:

As said, my name is Moth, and Team Fortress 2 has been a fixation of mine for around a year and a half or so. (I thank @comet-wire for getting me into TF2 via the comics and somehow giving me one of my biggest reoccurring fixations.)

For a while I was utilizing the comics and wiki pages to get info behind lore and the game, as well as gameplays, but lately I've been able to start playing the game! I've mostly been playing Offense but I'm trying to expand to Defense and Support.

This blog is gonna feature my OCs, as well as possible OC x Canon content. So, if you aren't into either, you can scroll and don't have to interact with my blog.

There'll be a point where I upload art on here too, but I don't know when that'll be, namely for art of canon characters. (You shaped bastards.)

Blog Rules for you Maggots

If you don't like me or my content, utilize the block button. Logically speaking, what's easier? Arguing with me about something trivial, or blocking my account?

Don't participate in or engage in shipping discourse, I'll only accept it if we're dogging on some SpyScout bullshit. Then again that's not really discourse as it shouldn't be a fucking ship. That is a father and son ya dinguses.

Don't interact if you ship Spy and Scout together, please. I needn't say more.

No Pyro gender discourse. We all know Pyro is

Be cool and be efficient.

Also don't be a shit person. Whether you're transphobic, homophobic, racist, ableist, etc. just... again y'all. Block me. I'll feel honored if you block me.

Ask Rules

You can send in just about anything, whether it be headcanons or just questions you have that you wouldn't mind getting a second opinion of. (Hell, I could even give ya kits for your Merc OCs if ya wanted.)

Be patient. I may not get to every ask in a day, or I may need to relax for a bit.

Don't spam me just because I haven't answered your question. If you want to ask multiple questions, that's fine. Just no "can u answer my ask" 20x over.

I don't do drawing requests at the moment :")

Might add onto this but for the time being I think y'all should understand. :}

[asexual-spongebob]

new pinned post! Cuz it’s the one year anniversary of this blog! :D

Ahoy!!! My names kitty!! But u can also call me kit!

I’m a minor, I’m not going to state my exact age but just know that I’m old enough to use this website lmao. And that I’m a teenager. I may make mistakes.

my pronouns r she/they/it/mew + neos !

(Also ps. Please do not RP on my posts.)

Wail Of The Siren AU master post!

this playlist has my fav songs and artists!! (NOTE: I do not support the actions of every artist on this playlist!

Other Information:

I have a tendency to cuss a lot in my posts, feel free to ask me to tag it! I also block people freely.

I ship ZaDr and TaGr, and other human/irken pairings. However I am NOT pr0sh1p. I view Zim, Tak, Skoodge, Tenn etc as kids and I view them as the same age (or close in age in Gaz’s case) as Dib, Gaz, Keef etc.

If that makes you uncomfortable, please just block me and leave. I do not have the time nor energy to engage in ship discourse for a show that’s over 20 years old. Do not send me anon asks trying to debate with me, because I will just block you and delete your ask. Thank you.

Also, like I said, I view the irken invaders as kids. Please do not say suggestive things about them on my posts.

Sometimes I post art or writing with more darker subjects such as mental health issues. I just figured I’d through that out there, however I do try my best to tag those things. oh and I’m also alt (scene, emo, goth and grunge.) and have a love for alt culture and fashion! (which is something I’ve been trying to get into have been learning more about.) :) I love making my own stuff, it’s very fun :)

Tags I use

# kitty giggles - general talking tag

# kitty rants - I almost never use this tag but it’s self explanatory. basically it’s my angry ranting tag

# kitty answers - ask tag

# kittyz scribblez - art tag

# wail of the siren au - tag for my invader zim au

# wots: next gen - tag for the next gen portion of wail of the siren. # wots irl saga - photos of my siren dib plush and other iz plushies I’ve made!! :3

# invader tak au - tag for my other iz au. # kittyz graphicz - tag for blinkies, blingees, stamps etc that I’ve made

DNI (link is 2 my straw page!)

and also:

Please Dni if you hate zadr with a burning passion . (Not liking it / disliking ZaDr is fine btw. Just please be nice about it.)

but if you constantly make posts about how much you hate it, harass its shippers, talk about how you want to do violent things to zadr shippers, or if you believe that all zadr shippers are nasty people, do not follow me. I will block you on sight if you do so.

i have adhd and anxiety. I also I have trouble figuring out tone in text so sorry if I misinterpret something! tone tags are very much appreciated! please use them!

I am an artist and fanfic author, I’ve written fanfiction and drawn fanart for a variety of fandoms, mainly kids shows tho.

if someone named @/kittysboba follows u thatz me lol! that’s just my main.

I made the Blinkies in this post using Blinkies.Cafe (expect for the invader zim blinkie, which I found on gif cities!)

I also made the stamps as well :)

I’m also a multishipper (which means I ship the same character with multiple different characters). When it comes to most characters or fandoms. I tend to like most ships as long as they aren’t illegal.

Fandoms:

Currently I’m most active in the Invader Zim fandom (specifically the ZaDr and TaGr side of it) and maybe Gravity Falls as well? I’m also getting back into the Octonauts fandom. but I also like Strawberry Shortcake (2003) SpongeBob SquarePants, Jimmy Neutron, Fairly Odd Parents, The amazing world of Gumball, Danny Phantom, Ed, Edd, ‘n Eddy, Over The Garden Wall, Angry Beavers, and Ruby Gloom.

I used to be in the H2O: JAW fandom a while ago but I’m not in it anymore.

Im kittysboba or asexual_spongebob on pretty much everything! (I’m K1ttysb0ba on da tho).

Thanks for reading! Enjoy ur stay! :3

(ZaDr kiss gif is by MKLier on Deviant Art)

[chronic-unionist]

Just for your information, this blog stands against the new club crest, as it goes directly against the club's very own charter, which was completely ignored by the club executives.

Below, a translation of the Article number Five of the club charter, which treats about the symbols and emblems of the club. As a guideline, the original design of the club's crest as displayed in Os pacatos leirienses em meio século de desporto amador, by Alda Sales Machado Gonçalves.

1 — The club's crest must follow the guidelines presented in the club charter. The following description use approximate terms in heraldic notation:

The escutcheon MUST use the "modern French" shape, argent.

On chief argent a flattened version of a mural crown, masoned with five towers argent. The towers doors and windows changed shape and form with the time.

Castle on fess (no color and drawing position specified, the castle with the mount was used from 1966 to 2024, but the mount was sometimes tinted or not, once again, it is not specified), with the characters U D L on honour point (once again, no color specified, both red and black were used for the characters at many points of the club's history).

On dexter base a gyronny of eight, argent and gules, on sinister base a fleur-de-lis argent on azure.

2 — The main color on home kits, flags, pennants and other club equipment is white.

3 — The main color for alternate kits or secondary color for the club symbols is recommended to be garnet (the first União away kits were actually lended down shirts from the deactived football section of Ateneu de Leiria), but the use of such color is not mandatory (i.e. the last garnet away shirt was the 2021/22 one, the last away shirts were split between red and blue. Other colors used for away kits were red, blue, and dark blue, while last season União also used a gold shirt as third kit and even a pink shirt as fourth kit).

4 —  Every single section and society promoted by the club must use the crest, flag and equipments mentioned in the previous paragraphs (important issue beucase the last club presidency press release stated the new crest will be used by all club sections).

If you want to support the cause for the reversion to the old crest, feel free to sign the petition below:

[h1bernight]

Introduction

Name: Kit or virux but u can call me other names like night

Age: 20+ years old (wrote this so I dont update this every time its my birthday except every decade)

More info: - I won't be online here that much but I do drop by time to time - Made this blog for the sake of my own peace of mind - Enjoy arts, writings and games that piqued my interest - If I made a mistake, don't hesitate to correct or talk things out with me in dm. I tend to make mistake time to time without knowing and also that its better than leaving things unresolved - Im from S.E.A (South East Asia)

[gallifreyianrosearkytiorsusan]

Our Bodies Know

Author's note: More of Nanael in Husbandry.

Summary: So- how did Nanael go from being a tragic boy to Cedric's Body dumping buddy? Part 4- Escape from the Black Legion.

Warnings: A Loyalist trapped among Chaos Marines. Threats of Noncon. LMK if I need to add anything.

Tagged: @barn-anon, @bleedingichorhearts, @c-u-c-koo-4-40k, @egrets-not-regrets, @kit-williams

Tagged: @sleepyfan-blog, @ms--lobotomy , @thevoidscreams, @i-am-a-dragon34, @gra93fruit-blog

Tagged: @felinisnoctis, @undeaddream

Nanael would like to say that he never screamed, but that would be a lie, and that was something he wouldn't do. At least not to himself. It had taken hours- many hours before the pain, excruciating and horrific as it had been, before he started to.

Hours before, when his voice gave out and he could no longer scream, or whimper. That the bastard stopped torturing him for now. Every time he thrashed and fought, hissed and swore. The bastard stopped torturing him and waited.

An amused, patient expression on his face. Like a father, with an unruly temper tantrum having child. Nanael had been trained to withstand a lot of things including torture.

So he wrapped the core of himself in a protective ball and did his best to let his mind drift, to ignore what it was they were doing to his body. To ignore the words they spoke.

It wasn't just knives in the firelight carving into his body. Words- spoken harshly meant to make him react. Mostly he did his best to ignore their words as they tried to force him to fall.

To try and break him, mind, body, soul, and spirit. But he wouldn't let them. He recalls his Father primarch's words, "I love you my son. Live."

Those words, no matter how much they burned, gave him solace, and a grim determination to survive, to not fall to chaos and turn from the Light of the God Emperor.

For he is a Primaris Marine- and they cannot fall to Chaos. To recount, to think about what those Chaos bastards did to him, would only serve to make his nightmares worse- and only please them with his frightened whimpers and flinches.

He'd learned, to his horror that the cage- and their Dark Apostle- with the aid of some dark chaos tech could twist the cage to keep him pinned and his arms and legs and wings trapped tight and bound unable to move.

"Uvrox," Toradreel says in that same horrifying mild, pleasant, soft spoken tone, "I know that you are a follower of Slannesh and have been eyeing our birdie."

"Yes, Sir." Uvrox says, licking his lips as he eyes the pretty Son of the Ninth Primarch.

"I know, that some of the ways that the followers of Slannesh indulge in worship of their Dark God is through is through the ... carnal partaking of the unwilling." Toradreel says.

"Yes Sir!" Uvrox says, almost salivating, shaking a little as he eyes Nanael.

Who starts to thrash and fight against his bonds more, the position that he's been bound in making a lot more sense- in a horrifying way.

"Oh- he doesn't like that idea," Toradreel says, "Perhaps we can have you indulge in that practice later, Uvrox."

"But-" Uvrox starts to protest, but the look from the Master of Torture has him ducking his head and scurrying off without much more fuss.

Nanael has a rollercoaster of emotion, and he feels wretched that he feels almost grateful to the bastard for not allowing that to happen to him yet. He hates himself. And Toradreel for that.

[panthaloon]

So begins the first league of legends blog post from my league of legends blog

PANTHALOON'S GUIDE TO PICKING YOUR MAIN

FLEXIBILITY

Pre-Foreword - Introduction of OP

I am panthaloon. I have been playing League of Legends since S10 and my ingame username is ImaginePancakes on EUW and EpikBiladerAnı on TR. I played a lot of ARAM and I jumped from champion to champion to find my main. I have devised a set of values that could help a beginner - intermediate player to find a champion that suits them and I plan to share these values over the course of 5-6 posts.

Note that a post extremely similar to this has been posted on r/summonerschool over on Reddit under the account u/Teacherson404.

Link to the original post on Reddit can be accessed by clicking here!

To begin, I am going to share my favourite value: Flexibility.

—————————

Foreword - What Even is "Flexibility"?

I define flexibility as the amount of options given to a champion. In this wall of text, I will be going to analyse flexibility in three main categories. Those will be:

-Build Flexibility

-Lane Flexibility

-Role Flexibility

These categories differ from each other in significant ways while remaining interconnected. Examples will be given under each section.

Finally, let us begin.

—————————

PART I - Build Flexibility

If you took a look at the in game item shop you might have realised this game has at least 2 items. "Itemization" itself is a very important aspect of getting the most out of your performance in League.

When I mention "Build Flexibility" I am not talking about the fact that you should build Morellonomicon against an enemy with high life steal/healing. Instead, I am talking about differing core builds that achieve different results.

A good example of the above explanation could be Teemo. Riftmaker and Liandry's into Nashor's is great for keeping yourself alive and healthy during teamfights. This core build focuses on Teemo's ability to apply his poison repeatedly to proc Riftmaker and Liandry's consistently. Nashor's only works to further help that fact. However, although it is efficient, it is not the only option Teemo has.

Building Stromsurge and Luden's into Void Staff makes Teemo a burst nightmare. Yes, it is true that Teemo will not perform as consistently with this build but build flexibility focuses directly on the core options. This build and the Riftmaker build both do different things and give you two play styles.

Another great example could be Varus with his Lethality and On-Hit builds. Both allow Varus to do different things. I will not dwell on Varus for too long because his name will pop up more.

A champion with poor build flexibility is Jinx. She is pretty much forced to build the same core every single game as nothing else works. She has poor lethality as two of her abilities focus on auto-attacking with her E having no AD scaling. Her Ult and W are her only options of dealing good damage with lethality but she already does that with her classic ADC build.

To capture the idea behind all that's said above, Build Flexibility allows a champion to adapt into different situations that may require a different play style. The difference is significant but not too much to completely change the essence of the champion itself. If you want your main to be flexible with the way they deal with problems without changing the feel of play too significantly, I recommend you try a few games of these champions.

Teemo, Varus, Jhin etc.

—————————

PART II - Lane Flexibility

In League the three lanes and who can play where appears to be pretty solid and inflexible but one look at a champion like Pantheon is enough to realise what is possible. Before that, I must mention that a champion with great lane flexibility often comes with a simple kit. Most of the champions I will mention here are flexible between Jungle and Top but I will try to give you more to work with.

Let's start with my personal favourite, Pantheon. Pantheon is the manifestation of Lane Flexibility. When you look at his kit, you realise how useful each element is. With his low cooldowns and his execute on his Q, Pantheon makes a great toplane bruiser. With his passive armor pen built into his Ult, which allows him to roam the map effortlessly, Pantheon fills in the role of a midlane/jungle assassin beautifully. With his reliable point and click stun W and his ability to stick to targets with his empowered E, Pantheon makes a great anti-carry support. Push it a bit more, and with his W range matching most ADCs auto-attack range, Pantheon can possibly be played as an ADC. His lane flexibility is unmatched. No matter where you play, there is a chance for you to run into Pantheon.

It is also important to mention, champions who are lane flexible are often build flexible as well. Galio is a great example of this with his AP midlane build and Tank support build.

This does not have to be the case. Poppy is a great jungler and toplaner but her build barely differs between the two. She is unlikely to run Grasp as her keystone on jungle but the similarities show a clear picture.

An example of a champion who has poor lane flexibility would be Kayn. With his passive before transformation urging you to get into fights, the only lane he can consistently perform is jungle. Another example could be Nasus. With the stacking mechanic on his Q, Nasus prefers to be left alone and farm. The chaotic nature of jungle wouldn't allow him to scale properly, no matter how easy it seems to run around eating jungle camps. Midlane is way too action-filled for him to properly execute his game plan and botlane is easily the most ganked lane. Nasus requires the island type isolation toplane offers.

In conclusion, lane flexibility allows you to take your champions on a run around the rift. The ability to show up on other lanes with similar or better performance also makes swapping places with your teammates less of a problem. These champions are a one trick pony's wet dream as they don't have to rely on getting the position they want to play in to perform. If you want to pick up a champion you can play in a plethora of conditions you should give a shot to the below champions.

Pantheon, Galio, Poppy, Udyr, Xerath, Rumble etc.

—————————

PART III - Role Flexibility

At first glance, this might appear to be the same thing as build or lane flexibility or even as an ungodly mix of two. That is true to some extent but there is some more nuance to it. A role flexible champion doesn't have to be lane flexible but they are very likely to be build flexible. Which is where Varus comes in.

Varus, with his passive, has a good relationship with On-Hit items such as BoRK and Wit's End. With a build that gives priority to those items Varus becomes a standard ADC with abilities that hurt a bit more than expected. However, that is not where it ends.

Building certain lethality items for him turns him into a long range one-shot menace. His damage with his abilities becomes insane. He becomes more akin to an assassin than a marksman. Something similar can be said about his AP build that lost a lot of its previous fame. With those builds, Varus plays less like a long range, kiting marksman into a long range, one-shotting assassin.

Another example of this could be Kog' Maw. He is often built as a DPS monster with a load of attack speed and On-Hit damage. However, if you build him AP you will realise that he plays a lot more like an artillery mage, poking your team down from two screens away, akin to someone like Xerath or Vel' Koz.

A champion with poor role flexibility could be someone like Yone, who is forced into being a glass cannon with life steal as when he attempts anything else he will either lack damage or sustain.

To conclude this part, role flexible champions are akin to coins with two sides. Playing a role flexible champions can allow you to find new joy from the champions you already know and love. If you want to feel like you have control over your own play style regardless of the champion you are playing, role flexible champions will be more up your alley. Such as the champions below.

Kog' Maw, Varus, Ezreal, Vi, etc.

—————————

PART IV - The Part Where I Finally Conclude

I personally found that the champions I gravitated towards have all been very flexible in one aspect or the other. When you are picking your main, your champion's flexibility is an important aspect to consider. Not everyone wants the drawbacks that come from having a flexible champion. A lane flexible champion on toplane will have a hard time reaching the consistent impact that Ornn has on the game as Ornn is a champion designed for toplane.

In the end, if you are having fun, all other metrics fall into irrelevance. Maybe you don't even like flexibility! I respect it. I don't get it but I respect it.

This post is a tool for me to show my observations and thoughts and what I think can help you. Don't take this post at face value and get yourself disappointed when the champions I mentioned above don't tickle your fancy as you expected. This game has more than 150 champions. Experiment and you are sure to find a champion that does you good.

Good Luck, Have Fun and most importantly,

"What the f**k do you mean they have Panth adc? GG go next.”

[tipsycad147]

Ancient Ancestry: 7 Clan Mothers of Europe, Tara, & Mitochondrial DNA

posted by : kitty fields

Our ancestors have a wealth of knowledge to teach us, if we only listen. In modern times, many people have no idea who their immediate ancestors were much less a whisper of their ancient ancestry. But technology has provided us with some very useful tools to dig into our ancestral past – DNA kits and family trees. In this article, I specifically talk about maternal haplogroups and mitochondria, the maternal haplogroup T (the clan of Tara), the Seven Daughters of Eve (Clan Mothers) and how to call upon our ancient maternal ancestors. 

What is a Maternal Haplogroup?

DNA can be rather confusing when you really start digging into it. Trust me. I know from experience. However, a recent book has helped me understand genetics a bit further (though I am still no expert). So what is a maternal haplogroup? A maternal haplogroup is a specific gene found in the mitochondria of your cells. Mitochondria are small particles swimming around in your cell outside of the nucleus that is only passed to you through your mother. Your mother’s mother passed it to her, and her mother’s mother’s mother, and so on. It can only be passed through women to their children. So, over thousands of years, mitochondrial DNA has been passed through maternal lines and still exist in us today.

With new technology and extensive research done by Brian Sykes, Professor of Human Genetics of the University of Oxford, seven European maternal haplogroup DNA chains have been developed that connect us to our ancient clan mothers from Europe. 

The Seven Daughters of Eve & European Ancient Ancestry

Recently I read an article written by Becca Piastrelli about how she found her 20,000 year old grandmother. It inspired me to look into my ancient ancestry and to read Brian Sykes’ work. Brian Sykes has traveled the world taking samples from live human beings and comparing to the dead for decades. His research is extensive and can be read in detail in his book The Seven Daughters of Eve: The Science that Reveals Our Genetic Ancestry. 

7 Ancient European Clans

Let’s further expand on the 7 ancient European clans from Europe. Sykes has traced modern day European descendants via their mitochondrial DNA back to 7 women who lived in Europe circa ten thousand to forty five thousand years ago. Sykes based his “clan mother” names on the DNA Haplogroup letters, as well as the potential origins and region of each clan mother.

From Becca’s blog post: “Here’s a cool fact: Your mtDNA assists your cells in using oxygen. So every time you breathe, you are using the mtDNA of your clan mother.” WOW! Let that sink in.

The Seven Clan Mothers of Europe are: 

Helena (Haplogroup H), Jasmine (J), Katrine (K), Tara (T), Ursula (U), Velda (V), and Xenia (X)

In his book, Sykes describes the settings and briefly develops the characters of each clan mother. This portion of his scholarly work was met with resistance, but in my opinion helped me to envision what my clan mother Tara might have actually looked like and how she experienced life in prehistoric times. It can do the same for you.

How to Find Out Your Maternal Haplogroup

To find out what maternal haplogroup you hail from, you have to do a DNA test. I know there’s a lot of controversy surrounding DNA tests and DNA overall, and I don’t know how to completely ease your fears because I am confused too. Some people say the DNA companies use your DNA to sell to medical insurance groups. I don’t know this to be true. I cannot find any real sources to confirm this. That being said, when I did my DNA through 23andMe, I opted out of the health DNA analysis.

23andMe

I recommend getting your DNA done through 23andMe to determine your maternal haplogroup and therefore determining your “clan mother” from Europe. Once you’ve found your maternal haplogroup letter (H, J, K, etc), re-visit this article to compare your results to the the Seven Daughters of Eve (European clan mothers) to determine who your clan mother is.

Clan Mother Tara’s Widespread Children (AKA Maternal Haplogroup T)

I discovered through my 23andMe DNA test that I am maternal haplogroup T, which means my clan mother (according to Sykes) was Tara. Tara is thought to have lived in the prehistoric area of Northern Italy, at the end of the last Ice Age. Sykes paints a picture of clan mother Tara and her tribe being close to the coastline, fishing and eating marine animals, as well as living in the evergreen forests which most likely covered the land during this period of time. She and her tribe hunted game and fish and gathered herbs and fruits to survive.

Migration to Ireland and the West Coast

Eventually, the Clan of Tara migrated along the southern coastline of Europe up along the western coastline and made their way to the British Isles. Sykes named the mother of maternal haplogroup T – Tara, which is Gaelic for “Hill”. The Celts were known for their red-haired people, of which is a proven trait of the maternal haplogroup T descendants. I am inclined to assume many of the ancient Celts carried Tara’s genes.

Udmurts, Native Americans, and Egyptians

Further East from the British Isles, the Udmurt people in Russia are commonly known for their red hair and freckles and have one of the highest percentages of haplogroup T in the world. There’s also a large percentage of T in Egypt and Eastern Europe (in addition to the British Isles). In my humble opinion, this is all evidence to support the fact that ancient peoples traveled quite a bit. They moved from one place to another, settling at different spots along the way.

While maternal haplogroup T only makes up about ten percent of the total European descendant population, it is widespread throughout the world, including in some Native Americans today. Probably the most famous of people in the maternal haplogroup T is Nicholas II, Last Czar of Russia. If you are in the maternal haplogroup T, he would have been a far cousin of yours and mine!

Calling on Ancient Ancestors & Clan Mothers

[gallifreyianrosearkytiorsusan]

I made some silly nonsense.

Tagged: @barn-anon, @bleedingichorhearts, @c-u-c-koo-4-40k, @egrets-not-regrets, @kit-williams

Tagged: @sleepyfan-blog, @ms--lobotomy , @thevoidscreams, @i-am-a-dragon34, @gra93fruit-blog

Author's note: So I wrote a smut thing. Y'all gave me brain worms of Regularly Scheduled Orgies To Reinforce Squad Bonds, or Something. So Titus and his Squad in Space Marines to are having Orgy Sex. You have been warned.

Author's note 2: I wrote this fast and when it was super late. Forgive me if it's OOC.

Warnings: Smut, mutual masturbation, praise kink, consuming cum, officer/subordinate. Uh? Maybe a bit of power dynamic imbalance? Orgy. Well a trio, but that counts!

=-=-=-=-

One of the things that Titus had almost forgotten, was some of the bonding rituals that were mandated by the Ultramarines between squad mates.

As having being a Black Shield for over a hundred years, he thought he could be forgiven for some of the more... unusual aspects of being reinstated as a Full Ultramarine would mean.

As an officer- and his schedule was carefully maintained and regulated, his schedule filled up quickly with sparring, training, teaching, prayer, eating, sleeping, and Squad Bonding time.

The various kinds of tasks that could be denoted as Squad Bonding time was delineated in color coordination that he recalls what sort of bonding rituals would be used for that time period.

Recalling the color for the mandated orgy color had been one that he'd almost forgotten. A blessing from the God Emperor that as he'd once been Captain of the Second Company.

That he had been in charge of ensuring that schedules and what not was properly sorted out ensured that such forgetfulness wasn't something that he'd have to deal with, not if he wanted to maintain being Second Captain, at least, before Leandros had betrayed him.

He had been introduced to his squad, and that had been a few days ago. Titus reads the squad bonding ritual that had been chosen for this day and ensured that he had in lubrication and headed to the meeting room.

Sargent Gadriel and Brother Chairon are already there, they are out of armor, and just in their body suit. Waiting for him to arrive, they had almost brought lubricant and some... items to help ease the orgy.

"Alright," Titus began, "Before the Orgy starts, I wanted to go over the rules, and ask what your boundaries are for this thing. What are your hard nos, and such like. We need to also establish a Safe Word."

"Red, for stop, yellow for slow down, green for go," Sargent Gadriel says.

It's a common one, "I also brought this horn," Brother Sargent Gadrieel says as he grabs a brass and black rubber horn, "in case someone can't speak."

He squeezes the horn and it makes a loud slightly obnoxious noise, "The person receiving, or the person unable to speak can squeeze this to halt what is going on."

"That is an excellent addition to this," Titus says with a nod towards Gadriel.

Chairon, Gadriel and Titus go over what their kinks are, what their boundaries are, and what their hard nos, soft nos, and their yes, and enthusiastic ones are.

Titus is also not in his armor as they all sit in a triangular pattern to all look at each other. "So, who should start doing what?" Titus asks.

"... Perhaps some kissing?" Chairon says almost awkwardly.

"Sounds good." Titus and Gadriel say at the same time, before briefly glancing at each other and back at Chairon.

Gadriel and Chairon both look towards Titus, as the oldest and highest ranking of them, the hierarchy of the Ultramarines is ever enforced in every aspect of their lives.

"Very well," Titus says, it's been a long time since he's had bonding rituals like this.

But he knows how this goes and what to do. He's an experienced hand at this form of Bonding, and hasn't had a complaint from his partner(s) since he'd learned how to do this properly.

He can tell that his younger brothers are a little nervous. So he gently strokes Gadriel and Chairon's cheeks before pulling one of them in for a kiss. After leaving Chairon breathless from the kiss and his cheeks slightly flushed.

Titus pulls away and presses a kiss to Gadriel's lips and their tongues fight for dominance, but Titus wins that battle as the younger brother allows Titus to gently press him to the floor.

"Are we going to do penetration, or not this time, boys?" Titus asks both of them through have lidded eyes.

"I don't know you well enough for that, sir." Both Primaris Marines reply at the same time.

"Very well," Titus says, "plenty of other things we can do. Now, we shall strip naked and I want to see how you pleasure yourselves."

"Yes sir," The younger Space Marines say at the same time and make sure to give their older brother a show.

Which he reciprocates, Gadriel and Chairon eye his impressive chest muscles, and he holds in a smile at the way both of them lick their lips in anticipation of being able to touch and taste him.

"Very good," he praises them.

They make sure to liberally use the lube, on their hands and on their wonderfully proportional cocks. Titus does the same thing, seeing the way that they pleasure themselves, once all three of them are fully hard Titus calls out, "Stop."

With a soft groan both of the Primaris Marines stop and watch him. "I would like to stroke your cocks, and have you stroke mine."

He phrased it more as a question, than an order, letting both of the younger marines mull over the idea, "Yes sir," Both of them say as they start to stand, "Ah- crawl over to me."

They complied, even if they were slightly grumbly about it, "Very good."

Although, Titus does notice that they seem to preen and enjoy getting praised, it was something he'd keep in mind for the next time. Titus reaches out a rough callused hands, one to each of them and starts pleasuring them.

They both reach out and grab one of his cocks. He tilts his head back and lets out a groan of pleasure- they each find a rythm as they pleasure each other to completion.

Titus is unsurprised when his younger brothers cum first- they are after all, less experienced than he is in such matters. But they had held out for an admirably long time.

He offers the hand full of Gadriel's cum to Chairon and says, "Clean my hand off with your tongue."

Gadriel makes a soft noise as he watches that happen. Once his hands his clean he turns to Gadriel with Chairon's cum still dripping from his hands and fingers and gives the same order.

Gadriel hesitates, only a fraction of a second longer than Chairon did, but does has he's commanded and cleans his hand full of cum. "Good boys," Titus praises. "now, help clean each other of my cum from your hands boys."

They realize the implications of his order and Gadriel give's his hand dripping with cum to Charion who cleans the hand off with his mouth and tongue, so does Gadriel for his brother.

Do you think space marines have the anti sex beds like in the olympic village? I think they might but I also KNOW that wouldn't stop them

It all depends on which chapter. I dont think the Ultramarines does, they respect brotherhood and cooperation too much. I think they bond with their squadmates so they keep each other safe.

[animostella-blog]

tbh this is the blog where i let loose and ship my muse with everyone ¯\_(ツ)_/¯