#'Are you drunk' you ask?

[y-rhywbeth2]

Was musing on what Bioware's original BG3 ('the Hounds of Iyachtu Xvim,' or something along those lines iirc), where the main character is Charname's kid, would've been like, aside from Bane-centric, and had an absolutely cursed Durge thought.

Brain: 'Hey, how can I make the deranged incest crap in BG3 worse while tying it to BG2 and the og concept for BG3? I KNOW!'

PC of BG3 is Charname's kid + the fucked up family shenanigans of Larian's BG3 where Bhaal has no fucking standards...

So Charname becomes reigning God of Death/Murder. Xvim seemingly successfully replaced his dad as god of hate and tyranny just like you did to your daddy, but oops! It's 1372 DR and Bane just fucking hijacked the kid's ascension to be reborn.

Time to make your own 'backup plan' and drop by a certain rock floating in the Astral Sea to cut a deal with daddy dearest, mayhaps. Failing that 5e Bhaal isn't OG Bhaal it's just Charname using his name and face to cash in on his reputation, but I like to keep some of canon for the weight.

Since we've gone to the pits of no return, let's go full gothic: we could even install the Sarevok romance mod to enhance the state of the family in BG3! Have hate sex with your half-brother who you hate for killing your adopted father, who hates you because you stole your shared birth-right and condemned him to hell, but who is the closest to being able to understand you and the position you are in. Work out a horrible dysfunctional relationship between you. Become goddess of death, appoint him your chosen. Later become your own father as well due to sharing the office with Bhaal as aspects of each other (either Angharradh or Mystra style). Use brother-son-husband, child-sibling and grandchildren-children-sibling-nephew/nieces for murder plans!

The downside of this is that I'm probably going to have to make an elf charname or something just to make Vel fit, because unfortunately I am attached to him being an elf for some reason... she'll just have to be a very short elf so that I can keep my tiny tyrannical librarian concept.

I can throw in the Xan romance! Young woman develops fascination with the first member of her culture she's ever met. Turns out to be an abomination which simultaneously repulses yet fascinates him because the dude is obsessed with doom and nihilism and how we're all marching to our inevitable miserable deaths. A year down the line, once all the youthful optimism has been crushed she has embraced the divinity and lost interest in you. She fucking leaves you for her brother who tried to kill you both.

Everybody needs therapy, but only Durge and Orin will be going (dragged kicking and screaming). There's a post-game adventure somewhere down the line where Vel goes to Gehenna and drags Orin back and they don't really ever get 'fixed' nor good, but they do get slightly better and some degree of happy.

[krysmcscience]

I have some questions about karaoke night, Alex Hirsch. Very Important Questions. Which I will happily scream at a poor hapless baby triangle who can have no answers for me, and possibly also does not have object permanence yet.

Follow-up that is I guess suggestive, but let's be real here, Bill's a fucking triangle:

Dude slipped right into his birthday suit, lmao

this is so stupid :D

Anyway, I don't care what anyone says, this brilliant individual knows what's up - Bill is absolutely way more of a monsterfucker than Ford could or ever will be, full stop.

[malinaa]

if i think about the hunger games in peeta's perspective i WILL start sobbing

[ohposhers]

i love how you draw Floyd, I'm an enabler, here to tell you to keep being deranged/positive

THANK YOU SO MUCH RAAA just for you here are some scrapped sketches of OOC High on ring pops Floyd I had originally drawn up for a previous comic I ended up not using cause I didn't like them + too OOC w/e w/e

the whole bit was floyd just gets really high and acts like a hooligan cause i think he deserves that

[cubbihue]

What is irep and Goldie(the triangle fairy) up to in this au?

Goldie!!!! Hihihi hello!!! Goldie is a Leisure Fairy! She specializes in Light Magic, so she goes around bringing sunlight to different parts of the world on Earth. Whenever a child prays or makes a shrine asking for sunlight, she responds to it!!

She has a very bubbly and bright (hah) personality!!!!!! On the surface. Goldie has a reputation to maintain as the "cutesy happy-go-lucky sunlight fairy", but in truth, she's pretty jaded for a fairy. She drops this facade around her close friends.

Bitties Series: [Start] > [Previous] > [Next]

[meanbossart]

How did your DU drow react when he got told he had to kill his spouse? and then when he went to wake up Astarion and get tied up? I think I just wanna know how your DU drow mentally/emotionally is doing during and after that part, and when talking to Astarion afterward, I'm a sucker for hearing about those deep kinds of moments (hopefully that makes sense?) Also, how did your DU react when you met Kressa Bonedaughter and learned all about what was done to him (again, I know none of the companions really comment on literally something horrible being told such a shame, honestly) but how would you say or think that Astarion and Shadowheart might have reacted hearing that info? Again, thank you for all your art and for answering these questions! PS: (I really don't care if your answer is super long; I WILL EAT IT UP)

Sooo for the first question, I wanna preface by saying that I personally don't think their relationship was that in depth yet, at that point. Yes, DU drow enjoyed Astarion's company and relied on him in a similar way which he relied on Shadowheart. And also yes, Astarion saw DU drow as the first person who ever took him and his agency seriously - but I think feelings were still in their infancy. DU drow's mind was a mess through and through; he drank constantly to keep his urge at bay, he kept his distance from everyone most of the time, and when he did seek out comfort in either Shadowheart or Astarion (the non-sexual kind, they didn't really fuck at all), it was a kind of primal instinct and desperate longing for companionship - if you asked him if he was in love with anyone, however, he would have said no.

Similarly, while I think Astarion's act 2 confession is sincere, I also think that he's being sincere when he says that he doesn't know what you are yet. You're not really a lover, but you aren't a victim, either; what you are is a person who he would rather not have to murder eventually, and as someone who has had their empathy squeezed out throughout the course of two centuries, that's meaningful enough. He may fantasize about the best case scenario for you two - but he has no expectations that whatever this is will last. But it is nice, for the time being.

So the "murder your darling" scene, rather than a proof of love and trust, is to me the turning point where:

A) DU drow has to come to terms with the fact that he doesn't have as much control over the Urge as he thought, and B) When Astarion snaps out of his care-free, just-go-with-the-flow nature around his plan and this relationship. They both realize they bit off more than they could chew and are now caught in each other's crossfire.

Which is to say that I don't read Astarion's words of comfort to him as entirely honest - specially when you compare it to certain dialogue deliveries later in the game. I think he's still, to a degree, telling you what you need to hear so that you hold out for just a bit longer and kill Cazador. You probably can't be together forever as he idly fantasized about once or twice, when he let his mind wander - but god damn it, he needs to at least be free, and it seems like you have bloodlust to spare to make that happen.

Meanwhile, DU drow finally comes to confront the fact that he is not in control. Doesn't matter how hard he tries or how much he drinks, the urge will do to him as it will, and when it wishes. It stops being fun and it gets scary, from that moment on.

But here's who did stop it: Astarion. Where alcohol fell short and his willpower failed, Astarion stepped in.

So, more interesting than the scene itself to me, is how from that point on DU drow would have no choice but put his trust entirely on the vampire to control him. He ties him up, he keeps an eye on him, he has full spoken-word permission to kill him if necessary - he is forced to be as vulnerable at humanly possible under his hand, every night. Regardless of whether or not DU drow realizes that Astarion is doing it for his own reasons, he doesnt care, because Astarion has now become his rock and his bondage - hell, if Astarion does have a reason to keep him alive that's all the better; someone else might just slit DU drow's throat and be done with the concern altogether.

And so, it's only from that point on that DU drow truly starts to see Astarion as an equal, and even a partner. He's thinking that, if his whole life has to be like this, at least he has someone who can handle it.

Astarion, meanwhile, I believe only comes to truly consider (and wish for) DU drow's freedom after he's free from Cazador - and after he bestows that freedom upon his siblings and the other spawn. That's when he finally understands the length of DU drow's devotion to him and the value of freewill as a concept- and how he wants it for both of them, instead of being content with his own.

Not to mention... I think in Astarion's mind he was 100% not going to survive Cazador LOL so when he succeeds he's like "oh shit I guess anything is fucking possible huh. Yeah fuck it lets go fight your dad, also I've decided I want you for realsies, now."

Anyways, can you believe I thought this was gonna be a short ask. Here have a doodle I made while thinking about all this bullshit:

As for Kressa, I got an ask about that before but I can't find it now LOL to summarize; he was pissed, angered, and in a far more personal level embarrassed to have had his dirty laundry aired (AKA, victimized) in that way in front of the others - but this isn't something he would have expressed outwardly, and I think both Shadowheart and Astarion would have known better than to inquire him about it. It's not really something he would have sought out comfort for in anyone, so, I think the subject died as soon as Kressa did. In this case, their lack of commentary was completely appropriate - If they had reached out in any way (which would have been, in my opinion, completely out of character) DU drow would have shut them out with a quickness.

[pressureplus]

this blog is the goat i love it sm :) totally get if it's too much but i'd love drunk seb headcanons. thnx ❤️

LOVELY, YOUVE GOT THE BIGGEST BRAIN ANON /POS

♡Drunk Sebastian Solace Headcannons♡

Warnings: Intoxication, Warnings to not Fuck The Fish™️, Brief Sexual Content

◞꒷◟ ͜ ͜ ◞ྀི◟୨୧◞ྀི◟ ͜ ͜ ◞꒷◟◞꒷◟ ͜ ͜ ◞ྀི◟୨୧◞ྀི◟ ͜ ͜ ◞꒷◟

First off, getting him drunk isn’t gonna be easy

His body is significantly bigger so it’ll take a lot more alcohol than a normal human person

That and he could already hold his drinks well, so it’ll take some work to get that man actually drunk instead of just buzzed

Don’t try to match him drink for drink, you WILL die of alcohol poisoning unless you’re an alcoholic

Which wouldn’t matter he’d still out drink you based on weight/size alone, so I guess try not to die is the only goal?

Doesn’t feel comfortable drunk around most people unless you’re BOTH that kind of tipsy or he’s already close with you

When you do actually get him drunk?

The flirtiest, giggliest drunk you’re ever met

Sebastian will laugh at literally everything, it makes him so much easier to talk with

The world is sunshine and rainbows as long as he’s really fucked up

Honestly? He deserves it. He’ll smile at you so softly and actually fully listen when you talk. Maybe he’s not the brightest, or most talkative, but he has weirdly good advice

Though he is super giggly and playful, he does flirt

Usually they’re kind of fun. They’re not meant to really invoke any real feelings

“Hey there hot stuff, you lookin for a chair?” As he pats a portion of his tail.

He WILL forget that he flirted with you later, so don’t try to corner him on it as some kind of gotcha moment. He won’t believe you.

It also doesn’t reflect his feelings entirely…well unless he really likes you.

He’ll get a bit tongue tied and may even let it slip that he thinks you’re just gorgeous

His flirting gets very personal if he has a thing for you, but it’s less frequent because the man is too busy squirming from just sitting with you

Think flustered school girl energy

If he likes you he will do ANYTHING you ask

Please don’t try to fuck the fish, he isn’t very smart and he’s not gonna be able to top you

You’d have to do 100% of the work, and he wouldn’t remember most of it tomorrow anyway

He will probably just fall into a fit of giggles at the offer, honestly, so the likelihood of it happening is like nothing

So unless you’re both so drunk you’re not thinking straight? Don’t do it. Dont even try it.

If he doesn’t like you in that way? You might actually die for attempting it. It’s not worth it.

Speaking of not worth it, that man loses so much motor function. His tail is apparently weirdly hard to control all the way

Will prefer to just sit with you and not go anywhere as he will not have the control necessary to do damn near anything

He tried only once to go do something while really fucked up

Stupid fishman got stuck in a vent for a few hours

Worst experience of his life, (drunk fishman claims) he would never ever do it again

He’s the kind of man that sings when he’s drunk too, but only if you do it with him. He mimics like a parrot.

Or if you manage to play songs with him somehow, he might sing them if he vibes with or knows the song

Get a man to sing your favorite songs horribly at an octave that outright hurts

Idk something like California Girls by Katy Perry? Have fun with it

He can’t exactly dance really well but he might do a fun little shimmy if the music pleases him enough

Have fun doing your shared little dances, drinking to forget (always remembering), and laughing about nonsense

I’m sure, as long as you get him something strong and a whole lot of it

The both of you will get along fine!

After all, he likes people that get him gifts like this a little more

[silkscream]

smut idea if you wanted options idk i live to serve (my liege) but stress fuck with peter bc uni is killing him and he’s on the streets every night and happy won’t get off his ass so when you crawl into his bed in just a t shirt and underwear he quite literally goes insane

18+ mdni!!!!!!!!!!!

god peter is so fucking pathetic. he barely has time to himself. barely has time to fucking breathe. yet, when he's alone -- when he knows that he'll at least be alone for the night -- he occupies his time by palming his cock at the thought of you. he thinks of your plump, pink mouth, how it circles his cock. how it sucks heart-shaped bruises on his neck and his broad chest.

and there's a night that he's free -- he means it loosely because he has to wake up the next morning to immediately volunteer. then, his schedule is packed with exam moderation, which he also volunteered for. he's busy as hell, and you'd gotten so used to it that you decided to occupy yourself without him. when you don't text back within five hours, he feels crushed.

but you don't leave him waiting for long. it's his night off, after all. you're excited to have him around in general. the two of you indulge in a marathon of your favorite tv show (you're mostly rewatching because peter had been too absent to watch the season with you, though you don't tell him this) and cooking dinner together. fulfilling his domestic fantasy, ravishing you in sweet kisses.

but peter also craves you in a way he can't say out loud. well, he can -- he's a big boy, he can tell his girlfriend that he wants to fuck her. but it's been a while, and the way you make your sleepytime tea and do your skincare routine discourages him from trying anything.

but then he watches you crawl into your bed with just a t-shirt -- his t-shirt -- and panties. he joins you, spooning you, though he's weary of the growing length that's probably prodding the back of your legs right now.

"want something, peter?" you tease.

he groans in frustration. he doesn't have the energy to play this game with you -- dancing around what he really wants. so he grasps you tightly, hands exploring your hips as he hovers over you. you're pliable underneath him, so soft and sweet.

peter wishes he had all the time in the world just so he could eat you out for hours. but he's been denying himself of you for weeks. he hasn't been able to be next to you in such a close capacity for weeks, either.

so he fucks you easily. there's no resistance -- you were wet by the time his bare cock was even prodding in between your folds. he still feels bad that he wasn't able to prep you (he really fucking wanted to eat you out), but you're still wet enough for him. the way you want him is enough.

peter has to pace himself, knowing that he might finish too quickly or hurt you in the process with his super strength. he drinks in your moans with his mouth, caressing your face with his calloused hands.

his hands have known blood and deep gashes. punches that would send his opponent across a parking lot. but now, his hands are gentle, just for you. he uses them to explore the softness of your body. he uses them to worship.

"love you, baby," he rasps weakly.

"love you, too," you coo. "cum inside me, please. wanna feel it."

and he does. he always does -- loves to listen to you and give you what you want. peter will cherish this moment until the next time he gets to be inside of you, even if the mission tomorrow is quick to finish. even if the mission tomorrow occupies him for days.

he'll come back crawling home to you. always.

[rottiens]

I need to hear more about your detective sukuna thoughts pls

✮ cw. 18+, implicit violence and sensitive topics, it is implied that the reader is a foreigner, detective au. fun fact; toji is sukuna's boss in this au just because I want him to :3 | divider creds: cafekitsune.

Sukuna has a reputation for corruption, always finding excuses to shoot, harm witnesses and, of course, use handcuffs. His methods are not always orthodox, but they always pay off. That's why his boss usually turns a blind eye when Sukuna is in charge of a case, giving him the necessary immunity and resources he requests.

Murders, robberies, arms trafficking: these are just some of the cases the great Sukuna has worked on, finding solutions over a ten-year career, with all of those cases now closed… except one.

The surprise death of the president of one of Tokyo's most important companies shocked the country, filling the newspapers and front pages for months. The case was closed as a suicide, but Sukuna knew there was more to it, especially when his superiors insisted that there was nothing more to investigate and that he should no longer stick his nose where it was not called. That only made him, of course, more determined to probe where he was not called.

He has been working "undercover" for the past few weeks, though not under orders from his superiors, but under his own rules. Investigating witnesses, collecting documents, sniffing out clues like a bloodhound, and among all those things, there's always one thing in common: you.

He has been watching you. You charge and pass each object through the scanner with a neutral face and steady hands. You look like an expert in the field. The tag on your uniform says "Aiko," clearly a fake name. Sukuna had seen your name on the report now lying under his mattress. He knows your real name, age, hometown but that's all he could collect, no college record, a family to pursue, an ex-partner or any other previous job. The president's personal assistant with a blank background, living in one of the most humble areas of the city, far from magazines, newspapers, camera lenses….

Sukuna places the pack of cigarettes on the counter with more force than necessary just as the store bell chimes. It's just the two of you now.

"Just that?" you ask without looking at him. Sukuna searches your eyes silently until you hold his gaze. Exhausted eyes, painted the black of your dark circles under your eyes.

How long have you not slept? What is keeping you awake? The questions make him bite his lip, restraining himself from pulling out his notebook and starting the interrogation right there, curiosity eating him alive from the inside but he knows you still need one more push to go down. He finally gives in, shakes his head in affirmation and you tell him the price, the same one you've given him for the past few weeks with the same lifeless countenance as always.

Sukuna pulls his wallet out of his leather jacket, showing you a flash of his badge glowing in the darkness of his clothes. Sukuna sees you tense up behind the counter. You pick up your hands and hide them where he can't see them. He slides a wad of bills onto the wood along with a white card with his phone number and name in plain black letters.

You shake your head before he has a chance to say anything.

"I just want to talk," he says, still, his voice a little hoarse.

"I don't have anything to talk to you about." Your accent is good, but he can easily tell you're not from here.

"I just want to buy you a coffee."

Sukuna leans back on the counter, holding his jaw with his open hand as he examines you up and down. You lean back in the chair, almost as if you think he's going to grab you and force you to stay still. You are visibly trembling, and it all makes his adrenaline rush through his veins, he is drooling, his eyes slightly wide at the prey in front of him. What are you hiding, what do you know?

"Can you leave now?"

Sukuna realizes how easy it would be to handcuff you at this point. With a little effort, he'd leap over the counter, mount you on his broad shoulders, and haul you out the door to throw you in his truck. However, remember that it's Monday, the flow of people is higher at the beginning of the week, and it would be a hassle to have to shoot another civilian.

Sukuna stretches as he groans; all the imagination of the scene has exhausted him. So he runs a hand through his hair and shoves the cigarette box into his back pockets.

"Call me if you're bored. I promise it will be worth it," he comments with a smile that makes you visibly uncomfortable.

Then he walks towards the exit and, with a creak of the bell, the cold snowflakes that his stale presence brought to the place begin to fall on your head and arms, covered by the thin uniform shirt, making you shiver even more, causing your fingers and lips to become like ice cubes with the winter that the infamous detective leaves behind.

[elodieunderglass]

So for some more details:

- I am fairly time-poor with a huge amount of commitments: Grownup Job Senior Promotion, three small kids on summer holidays/starting school, writing a novel fanfic for sick friend, peak growing/harvest season at allotment, etc. so im only offering “what I can actually deliver” at this time

- swan comic is a new idea, people like those don’t they? Not sure of how fundraising mechanism would work here but maybe taking prompts?

- not sure how essay would work but it’s probably my best/most appealing skill?

- material items in exchange for a minimum fixed amount. So offline I’m most known for material works. I’m not a BAD printmaker / craftworker and for this I would be looking at designing a sort of limited print run of greeting card style original hand printed prints. I know you guys aren’t familiar with this work from me, so this would involve a bit of trust that An Art from me would be worth at least £5 lmao. However it’s kind of nice to get something real in the mail right??

- super worried about fandom auction so this would be mostly a register of interest that I’d take to more experienced people and use as leverage to start an auction; I’m not in a great place to provide much actual legwork here. I also have huge guilt from like 2000-something where someone paid A HUNDRED AND LIKE 20 DOLLARS to charity for earthquake survivors and I DID NOT FINISH THE FIC AND I HAD to write to them, weepingly, apologising forever about it, and they were so graceful, they forgave me and wrote off my fandom auction contribution, but I had never watched the tv show they requested and was in the process of romancing dr glass and it all went SO wrong, this MIGHT heal my scars of shame from fandom auctions generally OR might make them worse. It itvery hard to write fic actually it’s my worst skill pls don’t pick this

Anyway

I will dance like a monkey and get sick kids out of Gaza. What would you like to see most?

[sugoi-writes]

Alastor with a reader who tries on his suit jacket and mimics him in a mirror ( I feel like this nut has a closet filled with the same clothes) and gets caught by him? I’d have to shoot myself if this happened to me but I want to feel the embarrassment radiating off the reader. (He finds it cute tho—phew!)

🍻D runk Danny Asks 🍻

Ahah, same warnings as before!

❤️❤️❤️

You poised in the mirror with your hands on your hips: Superwoman style. You heard that this was a pose that could actually boost confidence if you repeated this action daily... some sort of positive-reinforcement via brain chemistry. But, your train of thought was cut off as you did a giddy little twirl.

You fanned out the longer coat tails of Alastor's coat, marveling the split that made room for his fluffy tail. You squirmed at the thought of seeing it wag, but you controlled yourself. You grabbed a hair brush off of Alastor's nightstand, posing like you had a microphone to your lips.

"Salutations~ Good to be back on the air!" You attempted in your best transatlantic accent. You snorted, fanning your face as you shrunk in on yourself," Hells, that was bad!"

You pretended to lean on your imaginary cane, a hand to your chest as you belted out," Alastor, pleasure to be meeting you sweetheart, QUITE the pleasure! Have you heard of my podcast~?"

"As a matter of fact, I have~" You froze as a slow clap came from the doorway, a shit eating grin on the Radio Demon's face," Dare I say, I'm a huge fan of yours~" He perfectly mimicked your voice, a slight static over the intonation of your cadence. You squeaked as Alastor strode towards you, eyes filled with a prideful glee.

"Dear, if you really wanted to impersonate me... you should really do something about this posture!" Back to his normal tone, you nearly shrieked as Alastor's hands grabbed your hips. He angled them back slightly as he kissed the crown of your head. His hands slid up your body, making you gasp and writhe between them and their wake. He took hold of your wrists, hands loose but firm in their grip. The both of you looked into the mirror, your face warm at the sight of Alastor towering over you.

"Much better, dear... much better~" he practically purred in your ear, your breath becoming a distant thought. You had effectively forgot how to breathe. And Alastor would have been content with the teasing... if your hips didn't meet his own.

"I wonder... how do you sound when you moan my name...?"

You gasp as Alastor ground against your ass, a shocked mewl escaping you.

"Let's find out~"

[thegreatyin]

Same spouse!!!

my personal headcanon is that every player with this item is married to every other player with it

that's hilarious. accepted

[ipostmysimpingstuffanonymously]

I was scrolling through the sashisu tag and saw this post :

https://www.tumblr.com/ukiyozora/740878983187529728/calling-all-jjk-artists

If you still take requests could you do this :)

[starsxinxthexbluexsky]

The Untamed | Episode 36 [Drunk Lan Wangji And His Chickens]

⤳WangXian’s Favorite Scenes [19/∞]⬿

[harbingersecho]

finally played thru the infamous if demo and had an excuse to make a goth guy. with Facepaint and a coontail and everything. so here's Dane aka Lacuna of Dead Rat Society

[weirdgirlsparrow]

i like to imagine lark & sparrow in private still speak to each other in that strange shakespearian cadence they did as children, and the second another person enters the room they start speaking casually again

when terry's class was doing macbeth, he tried mimicking that cadence with them as a joke and it took the twins a full minute to respond cause they didn't know whether to brush it off or play into it