#''this could just be a novel instead'' and am kinda thinking about those kinda not. idk.

[allsassnoclass]

🧠🧠

hello dear anon! i'm a little late getting to this, but ask and ye shall recieve!

send me a 🧠 for a long ramble about something i’m obsessed with lately

i am going to be honest with you! part of why this is so late is because i have no clue what i'm obsessed with lately! i've been pretty busy with my additional job at the haunted house, but i already rambled about my character there here. i guess i'm obsessed with the overall lore of the house, but i'm mostly obsessed with the way that no one knows it???? like. they never gave us a written out version despite multiple people asking and we have a lot of actors who joined late and never got a proper tour, so most of the cast doesn't know the full lore! which is not great honestly! so i'm typing it up and going to throw a link to the google doc in the work discord. also though i'm obsessed with the way that the character actors have been adding to and expanding on the lore. for example, i learned that my character has a girlfriend, because the actor who has been playing the friend searching for me has been telling patrons that they're girlfriends lol. canon gays at the haunted house!

send me a 🧠 for a long ramble about something i’m obsessed with lately

ahhhh i'm obsessed with very devoted character dynamics where one character is willing to do absolutely terrible things so that the other one doesn't have to! i just think it's very spicy. devotion to the point where you are willing to corrupt yourself so that the other person doesn't have to! i have some original stories that are in the very very early works and i'm considering switching one character dynamic slightly so that i could pull of something like that, but i think for plot reasons i would need to add a different character instead. idk man, i haven't had time to think about any of my own stories in a long long long time, but that's a type of dynamic that is very fascinating to me lately.

[reiding-writing]

Hiii, I absolutely loved immortal it was adorable! I was wondering if I could request a fluff fic w Gn!reader where when Spencer goes to the swing set after the whole thing with Cat at the restaurant reader also goes there maybe to read a book and it's a whole meet cute kinda thing cause it's one of his favorite authors or smth? sry for the long request I was trying to be specific Imao

swinging [s.r]

Summary:

You attempt to find your usual late night escape in the empty play park late one evening after an argument with your boyfriend, instead you find a handsome stranger that you find oddly endearing.

WARNINGS: shitty boyfriend (not spencer obviously)

pairing: spencer reid x gn!reader

genre: fluff (kinda hurt/comfort)

wc: 1.5k

masterlist!!

a/n: i am reuploading this once and once only so if it doesn’t upload to the tags again then i am giving up-

“It’s a little late for a play date don’t you think?”

Your comment clearly catches the boy in front of you off guard, his head shooting upwards and his eyes wide like he was in a state of fight or flight.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you,” You take a second to admire the man in front of you through your apology.

His hair was fluffy, bordering curly, and long enough that it was getting caught in his eyelashes as he blinked up at you.

His eyes were big, round, and practically glistening in the warm lighting of the lamp post to your left.

He was dressed in a finely pressed black suit fit with a baby blue shirt and a lilac tie that made him look like he’d walked right out of one of those rom-coms where the male lead is a prolific billionaire.

He was gorgeous.

“I came here to wallow in my own self-pity but it looks like you beat me to it,” You can’t help but chuckle softly at your own explanation. “Do you mind?”

You gesture towards the swing besides his with a book held in your left hand and a soft expression, as if to silently tell the beautiful stranger in front of you that if he wanted to be alone that you would feel any offense.

“Uh- yeah- no- no, go ahead,” You don’t even try to suppress the smile that creeps its way onto your face at the way he stumbles over his words, and you take a seat on the swing next to him with a chuckled “Thank you,” as you turn your head down to the open book in your lap, just illuminated enough under the lamp post so you can read the words on the pages.

Any distinguishing factors, including the book’s title were unceremoniously hidden from view as it blends into the night’s shadows, effectively halting curious effort of the boy next to you to figure out what it is.

Of course, it doesn’t take long for you to feel his lingering gaze, and you follow it down to the novel in your hands before you show off the cover in his direction.

Paramenides by Plato.

“Have you read it?”

Your voice stops his psychoanalysis of your literature choices as he turns his eyes back up towards your face again.

“I have actually,” He nods softly at you with a pursed, slightly awkward smile, the contours of his cheek bones perfectly captured in the dim lighting. “I read it when I was doing my Philosophy degree.”

“No kidding-“ You let out a small laugh in surprise at the fact the cute stranger encroaching on your usual pity party venue just so happened to have a degree in Philosophy.

He also just so happened to have an absolutely beautiful laugh, the sound like a song in your ear as he joins you in laughing about the absurdity of the odds that the two of you both had a keen interest in philosophy.

“So, what brings you out here so late then?” You seem to lose interest in your book as the two of you make eye contact, shutting it in your lap as you turn your shoulders towards him. “No, wait, let me guess, shitty date?”

The boy lets out a breath that could almost constitute as laugh, averting his eyes from you and leaning towards slightly to awkwardly run his hands over his legs. “Something like that-”

You give him a sympathetic smile and a nod. “Don’t let it ruin your perception of romance, it’ll work out in the end,”

The boy’s eyes turn up towards you once more as you speak, and your smile becomes a little more awkward as he meets your gaze once more.

“You don’t look like you believe yourself…” His words leaving you blinking softly in his direction, facial expression full of confusion.“Your relationship isn’t going very well at the moment is it?”

Your expression morphs at his question and he immediately backtracks, waving his hands around as he tries to pull back the conversation.

“I’m sorry- I didn’t- I’m-” He takes a sharp breath in through his nose before attempting to actually speak a full sentence to you. “I’m a uh profi- A behavioural analyst- I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable i’m so sorry-“

“No it’s alright,” It was your turn to awkwardly drag your hands down your legs now, fingers curling over the edge of your book as you reach it and fiddle with the metal plating on one of the corners of the cover. “You’re not wrong,”

You can practically see the curiosity in his eyes as you confirm his suspicion. “Is that why you’re here?”

You can hear the cautiousness in his tone as he presses you further, clearly scared about crossing a line, “You said you came here to ‘wallow in self-pity’ earlier…”

You can’t help but laugh at the ridiculousness of your earlier statement as he repeats it back to you. “We uh, had an argument,”

You play it off as something insignificant, but you can tell that he doesn’t believe you and soon end up finding yourself spilling the entirety of your relationship problems to someone you’ve never met before.

“He has this best friend that he’s like weirdly close to and he stood me up on a movie night we were supposed to have so they could go out together instead-“ You sigh exasperatedly as you replay the nights events in your head.

“I called him to ask where he was and it spun into him yelling at me for ‘not respecting’ his friendship because they’ve been friends longer than we’ve been dating, it’s stupid really-“

“That’s not stupid at all,” He shakes his head determinedly at you. “He’s not respecting your relationship, i’m sorry you have to deal with that,”

You can’t help but feel minorly guilty for making a stranger feel bad for you, but you give him a soft “Thank you,” nonetheless.

You unfortunately don’t have time to continue your conversation as your phone buzzes with a message from your boyfriend telling you that you have to go home to your shared apartment.

With a sigh you pick yourself up from the swing, clutching your book underneath your arm.

“Well, it was nice to meet you…” You trail of the sentence with indication for him to fill in the space with his name.

“Dr. Reid- Spencer Reid- Spencer- I’m Spencer....”

You can see the flush spread across his cheeks and over his nose as he stumbles out his name.

“I enjoyed speaking with you Spencer,” You give the cute stranger, Spencer, a soft smile as you prepare yourself to leave, hands stuffed in your pockets.

“I enjoyed speaking to you too,” He returns your smile with one of his own, albeit one that’s slightly more awkward, and you can see his mouth fall open again as if he was going to say something else, but his words fall short.

“Good night,” Your stopped in your walk home almost before it even starts as Spencer calls after you with a new found confidence.

“Wait-“ His voice echoes through the empty play park, and you turn around to meet his glistening gaze once more. “Am I- going to see you again?”

His half-awkward demeanour was oddly charming, eliciting a soft smile that spreads to your eyes.

“I like to read here sometimes, bring a book with you and maybe we can read together…”

Spencer smiles at your indirect invitation to see him here again in the future, and he nods softly at your answer, standing from the swing he was sat on to mirror you. “I’d like that,”

“Good,” You give him another soft smile that joined by a slight tilt of your head. “I’ll see you soon then..”

“Yeah…” Spencer stays stood as he watches you leave to go home, mind running at a million miles a minute as his brain fully comprehends what just happened.

You’re already out of sight before he realises that he forgot to ask for your name.

[heartfullofleeches]

Imagine Miller doing a subbathon with yan chat except instead of donating bits to keep the stream going, they’re donating bits to see Y/n. Y/n is just sitting there next to Miller reading a book or something whilst they play a game and anytime the counter runs out because chat didn’t donate Miller juts kinda, throws a blanket over them or something until someone donates

A shadow appears outside your tent.

"Mind if I come in? Looks so cozy from here I might not leave.. Ow, ow, shit- not again." Setting up for the stream, Miller pokes their head through the curtains of your enclosure to attach a mic piece to a hanging frame, cerulean dreads snagging on the velcro latch in the midst of their playful banter. They mutter expletives, since as they tear their locks free. They crawl inside the tent and tap the mic overhead where you lay with a book in your lap and surrounded by a small library filled with more novels and other items needed for the duration of your stay. When Miller told you they'd be pulling out all the stops for your new corner - they meant it.

The whole idea for the space came when they discovered the very foundation for it online. They had mindlessly scrolling through various forums looking for ideas to make their room feel more of a home for you when they came across a frame for a floor bed fashioned in the design of a small house. It went in their cart that second and on their doorstep a day later. After gutting one side of their floor and setting the bed up, Miller fit it with your favorite sheets and pillows. They strung up mood lights and installed shelves into the walls for your trinkets. By the time they were done, the area was more decked out than their entire apartment. A fair act given who it was for. You warmed up to it well enough and that's all they could ever ask.

Miller grabs the remote for the lights and turns them up. "Quiet read in the dark unless you want eyesight somehow worse than mine." Their voice softens the closer they get until their lips graze your cheek. "You good to start?"

"Mmm...." You pull the blanket trapped beneath their knees over your lap. "Now I am."

Miller smiles. "Good. Remember, just turn off the cameras if you can't handle the attention. There's one there, there, and obviously here-" They point around the room, stopping on the front facing camera of your laptop. "And you have my card if you want order something to eat while we're live. I'll check on you in about an hour. Be good."

Miller nabs the pillow cushioning your elbow and lightly smacks your knee with it before backing out of the tent. They place it behind their neck as they sit down at their desk and adjust their headphones over their ears. Waking their monitors up, they find the feeds from your cameras on one and the scheduled stream on the other. Right before they tune in, Miller presses a kiss to the pads of their fingers and places it on the screen where you sat. The curtains draw back.

"Saw that!"

Miller hushes you, wiping the snicker off their face as the stream goes live. "Hey, guys. As some of you may know if you follow the community page, we have a special stream today."

They eyes the chat as you get comfortable. You yawn, laying on your side with your book in hand.

[I'll take your entire stock.]

[So glad I got paid yesterday. How are they so freaking cute?!]

[If someone gives a certain amount can they read to us too???]

[Alexa, what's my location]

"Your first mistake is thinking I'd have one of those things. Your second is not realizing we plan on moving every two years. You can watch them all you want, but it's best you remember Y/n is my partner. Cross any boundaries and I will take them away just as easily as I have shown them off to you.... but I'll still send pictures from the wedding!... Baby, you doing okay?

You hold your finger over your laptop's camera, reading the flood of messages and donations from your phone. "They absolutely hate when I do this.... but I think it works in our favor."

[queenlua]

this is probably egregiously cringey and/or STEMbrained of me, but, i think it'd be pretty fun/interesting to make a workbook / writing workshop-type thing with the following format:

* you're given a detailed, just-the-facts, beat-by-beat summary of some story.

* the story, as given, should sound pretty mid. scenes that feel extraneous, unclear overall theme, etc

* you sit down and write out "how i would fix this story if i were the author." which plot threads feel underbaked & do you draw them out more or just cut those threads, do you add/remove any characters, do you change anything to ramp the tension up/down, etc

* if it's a workbook, maybe there's an "answer" "key" of sorts in the back where a couple solid genre authors share what they did. obviously there wouldn't be a Correct Answer™ but i imagine you could glean some interesting insights from seeing both (1) what those authors considered to be Problems To Be Fixed and (2) how they fixed them.

* if you're doing this in a workshop format, you hear how everyone else fixed their stories. hopefully at least one person in the room is kinda good at this lol

like, i feel like in writer's workshops i've been in before, you hear a LOT of talk about individual sentences and style stuff, which is good and valuable knowledge to have! but there's a lot less talk about plot structure, partially due to limitations of the workshop-as-implemented, i think—it's impossible to talk about The Structure Of An Entire Novel if ppl are only ever reading it in 5k word increments. so... why not operate on 1-5k word summaries instead

i'm basing this largely on my experience with this one particular creative writing prof, where like, i got a decent amount of value out of workshop time... but by FAR the most valuable time was whenever i camped in this dude's office hours to be like "hi, sorry, i'm accidentally writing a novella again" (i... i was the bitch who submitted stuff that blew past the word limit for workshop... multiple times... i'm sorry) "and also i'm stuck on this one plot beat, can i tell you what my story is & hear how you'd fix it?" and like. damn. for a dude who wrote a lot of quiet stories where nothing happened, he had pretty strong instincts for How Genre Works, & i always felt like i walked away with some new trick for thinking about story structure

but i'm not sure i've had an experience like that anywhere else!

which seems like a shame. like yeah i've read Save the Cat and similar "plot structure"-y guides but they always feel unhelpfully... abstract, to me? like the thing where you're learning some new technique in a math class and it's like ok that's nice and all but i don't actually *know* it until i watch someone work a few problems and then work a few problems myself. i want to see all the tedious scratchwork and such, i am too stupid to learn it otherwise lol

[mythicalartistx]

KH Japanese Translations Part 6

Part 5

Series where I discuss fantranslations and this time it's on Vanitas

Ever since seeing Vanitas backstory in the novels I became more interested in him, I already loved him as a character but the novels really increased that. So I'm going to look at some of the fantranslated kh3 scenes

Everyone knows how the translations can be off, now translations aren't perfect in general but its kinda odd when there are entirely new meanings or censored in the localization.

I'm glad I looked up translations for his death because it's so much more. It's more about freedom to choose and it's not even about darkness that much.

Sora: That face is—

Vanitas: I am Ventus' missing piece. You made up for the missing part of Ventus' heart. That's why my appearance came from you. I am made from you both, Ventus and Sora. We're brothers who make up for what the other lacks.

Sora: If you think that, why are you fighting us? We should be working together

Vanitas: It's my reason for being born. It is because I am darkness, that you both belong to the light, able to exist there. If that isn't 'working together' I don't know what is.

Sora: But I never—

Ventus: But I never asked for that.

Ventus: There's no need to divide which one is the light and which one is the darkness. I am me and you are you, just live freely the way we want.

Vanitas: Freedom? Ah, I am living freely... like this.

Ventus: Is living trapped in darkness freedom to you?

Vanitas: That's the way I chose to live

Ventus: I see

Sora: Is that really okay? Vanitas!

And it's just great, it's bittersweet. I like it a lot more. It shows that Vanitas decides to be trapped with darkness and is working with them so they could live and exist in the light. And it makes me wonder if he wasn't, would Sora and Ventus be unable to exist or live in the light. That's just something. All three of them affect the others. And these FT explains the appearance better and how they relate to the other.

I spent time looking at fan translations through various websites, people's comments, old posts, YouTube videos comments— and especially content relating to SR because those are the people who tend to care more.

Eng:

Sora: Your face!

Vanitas: I am the piece of Ventus that was taken away. And you're the piece Ventus needed to be whole again. So why shouldn't you and I look exactly the same? You define me Sora, the same way Ventus does. We are brothers who together, make a greater whole.

Sora: Then why don't you stand by our side instead with darkness?

Vanitas: Because I am darkness. And I do stand by your side. I'm the shadow that you cast. How much closer could I be?

Sora: But I didn't —

Ventus: But I didn't ask for this. To be sifted apart nice and neat. We should be free to choose. Not just light, not just darkness. We decide what we are.

Vanitas: But Ventus, I did decide who I am. You see?

Ventus: And what you are is darkness ?

Vanitas: What I am is darkness

Ventus: Okay

Sora: How is that okay? Vanitas?

And there's differences and it's honestly moreso the whole concept about freedom to choose is left out. The official translation focuses on darkness and him being darkness because that's what he is when it's honestly not just that. I feel like he's more than just darkness but that's my take. The JPN also explains how Vanitas appearance is better and the separation between Ven and Vanitas as well was stated better as well.

And I bring it up because I once was talking about how I thought the ships were odd because he calls them his brothers and someone mentioned that it was just an English translation thing, people can ship whatever they want I'm not here to stop that but does that mean the person say something incorrect?

Now I'm going through the monster's inc where Vanitas realizes where Ven is and he says this line.

JPN:

Vanitas: Ventus! So you were hiding in such a place all along, remnant of my heart.

ENG:

Vanitas: Ventus. What a strange place to slither off to... you insignificant speck

Now I want to point out how the phrasing in such a place is said as an insult. It is stated that somewhere like that is worthless as if Sora is worthless. Then he insults him by saying you are little of his heart. Like he isn't worth much. The changes here make sense and it kinda flows better. Like insignificant speck is an insult that clearly from the way the original statement was said.

Final Words:

As much as it would be interesting to have Roxas also there, it wouldn't really fit. The only relation he has to Vanitas is through Sora by looking the same as Ventus. Roxas is a great character but for that scene in particular it made sense that he wasn't present. Now it be cool if we got a reaction to seeing him in another scene.

Sora is the one that helped both Ven and Vanitas. He saved both of their hearts. Vanitas gained his form and appearance by Sora ability to connect with them. Sora saved Ven's heart from being destroyed and Vanitas—a being that was with Ven so long merged with his heart that when he was taken out it affected Ven. This is stated in re: mind, speaking of remind someone said something that I honestly think is interesting:

Post Notes:

I once heard that Vanitas referring to them as brothers was only a localization thing so I wanted to look into that, but I couldn't find anything through all the sources I used. I even listen to jpn audio and he still says kyōdai which means brother. Not sure why someone once said that

And I bring it up because It was about how I thought the ships were odd because he calls them his brothers and someone mentioned that it was just an English translation thing, and they aren't like that in the JPN version people can ship whatever they want I'm not here to stop that but it seems like they still do so why did that person say it?

Unless they're referring the the remind scene when Ven is like we're not brothers we're the same but Vanitas tells him you're naïve for believing that I've been with you for a long time and is another being entirely. But that's all the English version and I didn't really look at any translations for that scene... If anyone does know more about that scene....

Also Vanitas is my second favorite character now 😌

[yanderes-for-everyone]

Title: Falling into the Arms of a Mad Villain

Status: Ongoing

Summary:

Instead of being caught by Prince Charming, I've fallen into a complete nightmare! Not only did I transmigrate into a trashy romance fantasy novel, but I fell from the sky and ended up in the arms of the mad villain, Edwin Crawford. Before I knew it, he called me his wife from the heavens and was raving about some prophecy. I don't even know who I am, so how can I be his wife?! Until I figure out what is happening, will it be safe to stay in the embrace of the Mad Dragon of the West? (Tapas)

My Feelings about it: (SPOILER FREE)

This series was just released on Tapas on May 20th, so there are only about 21 episodes. This series is the definition of a no build up obsession. The ml has an interest in her from the moment he sees her (though to be fair she falls from the sky, lol + he has a reason he needs her) He already feels like he can't live without her, and the fl takes to the ml surprisingly quick; she (so far) has the occasional thought of running away, but for the most part she seems to be fine staying around him.

I also think that the fl has no real discernible personality. We don't really get anything about her past; she pretty much just exists to be doted on by the ml and doesn't express any real passion or emotion. That being said, I don't think she's objectionable or anything. Plus... she's pretty.

If you can get past those things, I think that the interactions between the fl and the ml are pretty cute; the ml is super affectionate and expressive (for example, he always carries around the house.) I like mls that are cute to the fl and aggressive to everyone else. The ml doesn't seem like a manipulative type, he pretty much just reiterates to fl that she can't escape him.

In terms of plot, the lore of the world is surprisingly intriguing. The fl has no idea who the character she possessed is and how she relates to other characters in the novel. I won't say much, but the person she transmigrated into isn't a normal person. So learning about that and the world is kinda fun.

Despite some of my comments, I personally found it entertaining. If it seems like your type of thing, you should check it out.

Manhwa Rating: 6

Yandere Rating: 6.5 (Definitely could increase)*

*this means the ml's yandere intensity

[dropthedemiurge]

Got prompted by @pinkkop but also partially this might end up as the controversial Thai BL post because the range of characters I'd defend with the passion is very wide for me:D

8 BL BOYS I WILL THROW HANDS FOR

Uea (Bed Friend)

This show isn't jokingly called 'A Tale of 1000 Traumas' for no reason, I mean – there is only so much one young adult can go through, and Uea has been through... well, almost everything. Tagging hurt/comfort fics on AO3 will result into red triggers all around. What fascinates me in this character is his resilience, too. He managed to go through everything with the sheer will power and knowing his own worth, what he deserves and what he does not. I am so glad the show made an active choice to send him to therapy and give him a considerate and loving boyfriend! He really needs both.

Sky (Love in the Air)

Again, no surprise that everyone would want to protect Sky. The acting was also chef's kiss in this show, I know I shouldn't be but I absolutely enjoyed seeing Sky getting triggered and sent to the red-lit room in his mind because this was pure cinematography, but irl I would just hug Sky with consent and never let him go. And kick Gun until he never rises up again too. I think Rain should've been given full freedom to avenge for his best friend. But this is also why I'm writing all these skyrain fics – because they are safe space for each other and I want to keep seeing it.

Rain (Love in the Air)

Ehem, like I said– the show has not declared it loudly but he's one of the most ADHD characters in Thai BLs if I ever saw one. He does not deserve to be mocked for his struggles and airheadness. I wish we saw more of him playing into his strengths beside taming a dom, instead of being infantilized by the show sometimes. Don't ask me to dive into full analysis though, I only could watch the PayuRain half of the show once so I'm going off vibes I remember, but I absolutely adore Rain and love reading fics that focus on his ADHD headcanon and how others understand and help him. And also those platonic BDSM tendencies he has with his best friend Sky.

Kawi (Be My Favorite)

For this guy, I would not fight the show or narration because they treated both characters and viewers with care, gentleness, wise teaching and love (Max is a harsh brat but that's his personality). I would actually fight the fandom: from people who hate-watched this show and refused to acknowledge it was amazingly done further than 'i might've liked it but ew screw this actor and novel the show was inspired by amiright don't judge me for liking it jk lol' to some individuals who missed the beautifully developed and portrayed close bond (aspec on at that, I'll stay firm) that spread across >10 years and different timelines and reduced Kawi to immature whiny weirdo who's scared to fuck Pisaeng ten times a day instead of one, idk. This show is a gem with many life-lessons and Kawi has one of the strongest and fascinating character development in Thai BLs that I've seen. Hands are being thrown.

Boston (Only Friends)

The creators of the show said the series didn't have any intentional message, but considering how many long discussions and poured out frustrations we had with some people, Only Friends definitely did Boston wrong. So what if he's a proud slut, should the show punish him for it while praising 'righteous' characters high on their horses? I don't think so. My guy was constantly filmed illegally and threatened by his hookups and friends, he's very hesitant about falling in love but he tried his best with clearly spoken offers, poly views and limits. I also see Boston kinda neurodivergent and/or demiromantic based on many lines he said about himself and his own view of people and relationships in the series. Nick might not be fully compatible with him, and I would throw hands for both of them, but if those two would communicate better, there would be no need for the OOC "twist" at the end. Their story could be beautiful, sad and realistic, instead Boston being kicked down in the street dirt by everyone after opening up about his heart and fears made me angry.

Akk (The Eclipse)

These descriptions just keep getting longer and longer? Oops... I don't think I need to explain the desire to protect Akk – this guy has not stopped crying since a mischievous and passionate newbie managed to break through his 100m thick wall of composure, pokerface and sheer will to survive. And also through all the manipulation Akk faced from the people he looked up to. Akk and everything that he went through managed to rip my heart out, and I'm not kidding. If you're repressed, oppressed and/or struggling with money, desire to make your parents proud and can't help but feel 'disapproved' feelings for someone – meet Akk, he's very relatable. I'd protect him and you too.

Thua (The Eclipse)

*clears throat* I did say this post would get controversial. I can and I will consider 90% of the people who hate Thua as lacking media literacy :D But without getting into useless fandom discussions, Thua is a poor teenager that needs love and support to be able to find himself and his own voice. He's stressed out by a harsh step-father, constantly facing homophobia and mocking in school, has suicidal intentions and the only good friend who opposed homophobic students and teachers, who showed him safe space and helped reach out to his mother, encouraged him to speak out loudly... went behind everyone's back, started dating the main "bully" of the school who threatened every queer for months and decided to support him while silencing students' and Thua's voices. At least that's what Thua experienced from his POV. Would you throw hands? Thua did, and while I may not agree with how he handled the situation, I can't hate him. He finally stood up for himself and his own, tried to change the system, and I'd fight Suppalo school for him too.

Black (Not Me)

There's someone who doesn't need my protection at all! A second before turning into bloody merciless activist-fighter who doesn't shy away from murdering capitalists and cops, I would still want Black not to think he's better off alone. While antagonistic sexually-tense exchange of comas with his ex-best friend can count as one of the most delicious type of romance that happened in subtext not text, he still deserved to seek solace in his ex-girlfriend and (ex? they were so close, why Gram does not care about him at all when he returns? we'll never know) other activist friend's company. Also, fighting with his life to change something in how the country works and hearing 'nah, your twin is better, he knows how to fight with social media so we achieved more with him than with you' from his mentor and Black deciding that he should again ditch everyone he cares about...noo:( I need spin-off about him where he gets everything he really deserves.

[kiwiana-writes]

4, 6, 9 and 19- or any combination of those if that's too much!

4. Do you write original stories as well?

2024 is the year of the original novel, baby! I may have done more, like, setting up a website/Substack/Airtable writing tracker/etc than actual writing at the moment, but in my defence I'm still wrapping up my freelancing obligations this month lmao

6. What is a fandom you will never write for?

You know, it's hard to say 'never' because... I never know what's going to grip me. I never would have predicted that I'd write a fic for the TV adaption of The Last of Us, or that I'd walk out of the theatre after going to see a queer Christmas movie and rage-write an alternate ending in three hours.

So I'll take a slightly different approach to this question and instead say a fandom I'll never write for again, and that's HP. I respect the hell out of the authors who have gone full death of the author about it and reclaimed the world they love to make it better, I really fucking do. But I pulled my HP fics down from AO3 when I realised that seeing the author's name on my fandoms list, on my profile, was just... really fucking with my little trans non binary head.

9. What are your favorite fanfics?

This question is cruel. CRUEL. I have never picked a favourite anything in my life. Here's a few things I'm vibing with RIGHT NOW, but the answer may change in a month or a week or an hour lol.

Going Platinum by @cricketnationrise - always, but especially now as cricket works through the sequel. I feel very taken care of by this fic and have reread it a truly embarrassing number of times.

I really hope I can get him alone by @clottedcreamfudge - the Henry POV of Kinda think that I might be his type aka Alex and Bea fake date. I am just. iu4oqhurfriehngfuqernugoenuogre.

In His Wildest Dreams by @myheartalivewrites - I bang on about Oxford Days by this author a lot (and for good reason) but FUCK this one is beautiful. I am forever a sucker for the psychology of kink.

Noble Blood by @orchidscript - currently a WIP, somewhat based on The King's Assassin by Benjamin Wooley which is the book Mary & George is based on. And like... here's the thing. I picked up pretty quickly coming into this fandom that The Thing Orchid Is Known For is researching the absolute living fuck out of her fics, and like... I respect it, but I also didn't really think about it much, because while deep-dive knowledge is fun, as long as something's plausible enough that it doesn't pull me out of the story I'm along for the ride, you know? But this fic. THIS FIC is based in a time period I am very familiar with (my focus was always Tudor England, but you don't study that time period without picking up a lot of knowledge of the decades either side of it) and like... I get it now. Reading a historical fic where you know so much about the time period, and seeing all these tiny little details sprinkled throughout that, like, aren't actually required for the plot but are just weaving the tapestry of the world... fuck me, it's an entire different experience.

Something Borrowed, Something Blue by @anincompletelist - currently a WIP, I believe it's due to be completely posted by the end of January? But y'all it's so fucking engaging and I am loving the journey so much.

When I Met You (I Could Not Speak) by @sparklepocalypse - forever on my fairytale bullshit as y'all know and this one is EXCELLENT.

You love me! You love me? by anarchyat4am - god. GOD. I don't even know what to say about this one other than PLEASE READ IT. Trans Alex and one of my favourite tropes, quietly falling into a relationship.

19. Dead or overused tropes?

I am an extremely firm believer that there is in fact no such thing. People are forever coming up with new twists on tropes, and even fics that play tropes totally straight are infused with the author's voice or experience or whatever. If I didn't want to enjoy the comfort of the familiar, I would probably not be engaging with fic in the first place 🤣

[Ask game for fanfic writers]

[halliescomut]

So....I meant to start Century of Love after I watched the new ep of Love Sea, but instead I got sucked into Sunset Vibes. I will admit that I didn't make it past four eps of Big Dragon, but I find MosBank to be incredibly sweet and delightful, so I was curious about this new show.

I'm on ep 4 now and I gotta say that I love it. It's a vast combination of things that feed into me liking it so much, and so I kinda wanted to ramble about it.

The story is not new or crazy refreshing, it truly just feels like a romance novel put on screen. The characters while very likeable aren't very detailed, so they're kind of blank slates you could potentially put any pair in and get a watchable result. I think the difference in having MosBank in those roles is that there is such clear affection between them that they truly sell the connection. Seeing SV, it kind of makes me think that maybe the problem with BD was that there was supposed to be a certain level of antagonism between them and it never hit quite right.

Out of all of the workplace romances we've gotten in the past year, this one does work remarkably well. I think perhaps I feel less awkward about it because there's a connection already established between Sun and Lin before they became 'coworkers' or specifically boss and employee. I know the power imbalance is uncomfortable for some, but I do feel like there's an effort made to mitigate those concerns. While Sun shows interest and encourages Lin about his work, he's not doing him favors or simply handing him opportunities. And Lin isn't seeking out favors from Sun. They both put effort into keeping their work separate, especially Lin, who values his work speaking for itself.

Lin's friends, including the second couple that is his friend Yo and Sun's brother Sam and their little enemies to lovers thing is both fun and unique enough, that you are invested. I obviously have concerns about when any of the friend group find out that Sun's brother is their fellow intern, but it's an expected issue and because this show is very classic romance, it will resolve positively I'm sure.

I am wondering how the weird dreams from Lin will fit in with everything, and I'm sure if I looked up anything about the novel the show is based on I could find out, but honestly not knowing is a lot of fun.

I will also say that while I'm not prude, I do find there to be a level of sweetness in the characters 'taking things slow'. I know Lin's a virgin and that's part of why, but there's this very sweet tone that's applied to the romantic moments so far, like it's very much feeding this light romantic fantasy feeling. In contrast with the visual gags that are clearly intended to imply sexual things it gives it a level of tongue-in-cheek humor that is surprising and delightful. As the series is rated NC-17 I'm certain eventually things will get pretty steamy, but I do hope they keep the fun little visual gags.

Overall the show is refreshing to watch, a nice contrast to more complex and more serious series happening now.

[annebrontesrequiem]

Yearly literary snob rant incoming…

One of the things I really love about Wuthering Heights, and one of the things that makes it very hard to adapt, is just how multi-layered it is. This is one of those books where you can read it multiple times and not only notice lots of new things, but sometimes have very different reactions. I've only read this book twice so far and I have had almost polar opposite reactions to it in some aspects which I even now find fascinating.

The first time I read Wuthering Heights I didn't know anything about the plot, besides that it was considering romantic. I didn't read gothic fiction, and I had only read one of Emily Bronte's poems ("No Coward Soul is Mine"). I was so incredibly struck by the violence of the book - the violence of the emotions, of the characters, of the house and the moors itself). I was entranced and horrified by the wounds the characters casually - or not so casually - inflicted upon one another. I also could not understand how people considered Cathy and Heathcliff in love. Not even that I didn't think the book was romantic, I didn't consider these characters in love.

Skip forward two (?) years and I have thought about this book at least once a week in the interim and have realized I am obsessed with it slightly, so it's time for a reread. This time I don't know what happened, but something clicked. I understood the love between Cathy and Heathcliff - twisted though it definitely is - in a way I found almost appalling before. If you scroll through my Wuthering Heights tag you can actually see the change (which is so funny to me). I also came to appreciate the story in a much bigger sense. Instead of reading it merely as Heathcliff's spiral into madness and violent retribution (though I do love some good destructive revenge, and still enjoy that part of the book most), I saw this vast tapestry of this one family.

The cycles that weave in and out of this novel, running into each other, cutting each other off, sometimes forming a beautiful harmony, is a glorious part of this text. It's also something I didn't notice the first time because my reaction was so blindly emotional. I was so struck by the violence of the characters' emotions (there are very few mellow emotions in this book) that my opinions reflected it. That in itself is incredibly impressive, that this novel can illicit such strong feelings from its readers.

This book is so dense in a way that I think is rarely acknowledged in popular culture, and to be honest it kinda drives me nuts. Obviously I am not the only person in the worlddd who understands Emily Bronte, as there are people on this platform who are much better versed in its intricacies than me, to say nothing of actual academics. But I do wish the zeitgeist would catch up a bit. Yeah this story is a love story between Cathy and Heathcliff. But it's so much more!!

Mandatory if you haven't read this book what are you doing go read it, it will be one of the best things you've read and even if you don't love it you will probably have strong opinions about it!!

[amarisrosalette]

Archons x WoF x Warrior Cats Concepts

update: so finals are nearing and apparently my sanity has been dragging down recently so i thought combining my hyperfixations into an au is how i cope /hj

(i actually drew this during finals, now its been sitting on my drafts for god knows how long)

so i began thinking of two separate crossover aus where the archons, specifically my comforts barbatos and morax, would look like in the following book series: Wings of Fire and Warrior Cats

so for the people who don't know both of these books series are fantasy novels surrounding dragons and cats, respectively

and because i haven't told you guys that i love dragons and cats now is the best time that i reveal it

so i present to you guys:

Character Concepts of Barbatos and Morax as dragons in Wings Of Fire style!! (FYI i plan to separate this au from WoF because i too am not very happy with the canon lore and i overall just don't rlly vibe with it and WC is just. kinda sitting there. no real plot or plan purpose. just did that for fun.)

these were the concepts i did while i was experimenting around krita and whatnots, so let's start with old gods as dragons shall we?

Wings of Fire (+ closer zoom-ins, ignore the doodles, i'm a little insane i know but hey this is tumblr)

okay so just allow me to lore dump for a while, I'll also talk about the other archons who aren't featured here because I'm still thinking of concepts for them

starting with Barbatos, fellow WoF people might not recognize his species but he is an AvianWing, which are the basically bird-like dragons that i created in my au

they're very fast and agile creatures, they are known to hunt in packs like raptors and make efficient yet deadly hunters. they have sickle claws on their hindlegs and are known for their famous "songs" which are long melodious, almost song-like, calls that they use for various things such as communication, mating, echolocation, and more.

although not known for brute strength, venti doesn't let that stop him. where he lacks for brute strength and size he makes up for his speed in his slim body, force, powerful beak, and talons made up of strong muscles for pulling and slashing.

while he isn't a fan of hostility and fighting, he is much stronger, older, and wiser than he looks. he may act youthfully and even a bit silly, but this doesn't come from a place of naivety but rather a wish to enjoy life as it passes.

he is a well-known dragon around his kingdom, although he isn't a ruler, he laid the foundations of the reforms of his kingdom but refuses to take fame for himself, instead giving it to his older twin brother, Himmel (who is nameless bard and is alive in this au)

he and his brother are, of course, traveling bards, who'd like to perform on the streets or look after dragonets in the villages when their mothers weren't around.

many dragonets know and love him and Himmel, and they see them as elder brothers they like to snuggle with to hear their wonderful stories and beautiful songs.

he's kind and well-loved around his kingdom, and even established good relations with the current ruler.

cunning and swift, he has heightened senses for successful hunting. common in all AvianWings, they are known to possess a keener eye than most dragons for spotting small prey from above ground.

with that said, the look of underestimation on some dragons' faces does not go unnoticed by him.

but it doesn't matter, he could use it to his advantage anyway, so he plays along.

it wasn't until he unexpectedly turned the tables, making them face the hidden strength that he was provoked into protecting his loved ones in the distant past...

but that was all but a memory now, as he cuddled up eager dragonets with his wings chirruping and squawking when they wanted to hear his song. those wide pairs of eyes were hard to resist, even for a bard like him.

his elder brother settles them near and gently shushes them to behave before they begin, which they so obediently follow.

he chuckles, and so he sings with his voice, of tales gone by from the past, carefully woven into a meaning that one day, he hopes, the future dragonets will understand.

lore dump aside, i genuinely created the avianwings because i wanted to accommodate the WoF universe for venti and mondstadt because i thought that the bird and freedom motifs would suit him really well + the stigma of not looking strong at a glance but can shock you when you're not looking carefully. idk guys i think the birds are venti's spirit animal yk :)

next is Morax. i haven't quite thought of his lore yet, so let me go over the concepts i thought while drawing of him.

one day, i had a question in my head of a "what-if" scenario of what would morax's exuvia look like if he was in a different style of a dragon, specifically the western dragon and in WoF style, aside from the traditional lung.

now this isn't meant to be a cultural erasure, as i know the lung dragon is an important figure in Chinese mythology and formed an integral part of zhongli's character in genshin, however, i just wanted to entertain a new idea, and so i experimented with a new style of his dragon form (more specifically the European dragon style of WoF).

this isn't to say that his exuvia form looks bad or ugly, this is only a curious experiment or retelling of him in a new light.

anyway in the au i'm thinking like he's some sort of a skywing general or warrior bc the whole mountain dragon thing going on for the skywings seems really fitting for him

he's a very strong guy, well-spoken past his prime age but he still stands a formidable warrior

he's an experienced general who was trained vigorously from a very young age, and he rose to his ranks and became a famed and well-respected warrior

he also carries one of the most rarest genetic traits called metallic scales, and they reflect the sun's golden sheen under the light which earned him the title "Warrior of the Sun"

hes just a big scary dragon that looks intimidating but actually has a soft heart inside like canon morax, he may or may not have retired from his position but this was him during his prime (?)

dragon zhongli (not morax) is just a grandpa now bc i say so. hehehe

also skywings in my au are much different from their canon counterparts, they're much taller, stronger, and have more color diversity than just red or orange, and their tribe personality is different than just being thin, grumpy, or violent

(and yes all of the tribes in my au are more sensible and less arrogant than canon)

and uhm. dont mind the third doodle. i just went a little crazy if venti was a tiny bit messed up as a dragon)

moraxs dragon form and the whole metallic scales thing was heavily inspired by an artist called @sarcosse.7 on instagram. they don’t have a tumblr but their art is amazing! if you want to you can go and check them out!! they’re really good at writing and their oc lore is interesting.

next is warrior cats (and no im not beating the weird kid allegations, i genuinely cannot contain the silliness anymore, i love cats smmmmm)

and YES DONT MIND ME I TOYED AROUND ABOUT CATS WITH HAIR. it looks cool okay don't judge me /hj (my designs my rules, i am defying the laws of logic)

on the second-third drawing, i tried to experiment with a new brush with the disney-esque feel with fluid motions (like the waving motion of his)

ANYHOWWWW. i just pictured venti as a silly mischievous lil cat. think he might be a windchill warrior or rogue or something idk. but i was thinking about how the genshin nations would look like if they were in warrior cats clans.

also cats with braids r cool

i don’t have anything else to say in here other than KITTIES

ppl i wanna call just in case: @cinnabell2 @lanternlightss @ventisslut @probably-haven

[blueskiesandstarrynights]

hi i am prompting you for the deeper reason you think robin would dislike eddie

SO GLAD YOU ASKED and that you're interested!

So, most of my information is coming from the book Rebel Robin which isn't technically canon, however, a lot of people use information from this book for headcanons and fics, and it's an excellent and interesting take on her character that I adore. If you wanna read the novel I highly recommend it and would happily provide a pdf link.

Onto the actual thought though. This all originated from a character named Dash. For context, Dash is one of my Robin's friends (though that is a very loose term if you're familiar with the book at all) from band. He has this idea that nerds are superior, and on the surface it sounds like a W for the underdogs and whatnot, but that's not what he wants. What he wants is to completely invert the social pyramid, put nerds on top, and basically have them functioning the way jocks do now (top of the pecking order, gets all the girls, etc).

And this....isn't far off from what Eddie obnoxiously preaches. It's not quite as obvious as "let's invert the social pyramid instead of calling out that a social pyramid at all is bullshit" but it's kinda adjacent. He gets up on his lunch table and mocks people for their interests from theater and band (both of which are historically kinds of nerds, one of which is something Robin canonically has a vested interest in) but also basketball players and cheerleaders. You could argue for the latter that he's just making fun of the assholes in those categories, but that doesn't really work with the way he phrases it. He mocks them for their pom poms and tossing balls into laundry baskets, not for being dicks, clearly mocking the sport itself. Eddie just seems to think his specific brand of nerd is inherently superior for just being what it is.

Dash isn’t talking about the weird and looked down upon when he talks of a nerd uprising, he just wants to invert the social pyramid and get girls and attention the way all the jocks do, and Eddie doesn’t actually look out for the little guy like he seems to claim, he just takes in a few that fit in his narrow view of what a nerd should be, then mocks everyone else for having any other interest while yelling about conformity or whatever the fuck he’s going on about this week.

[blushweddinggowns]

Steve was having a mild crisis. And its name was Eddie Munson. His new best friend, only second to Robin, the guy that Steve was sharing a bed with ten times out of ten. Steve never imagined that he’d ever end up this close to the dude who sold weed behind the gym, but here he was, absolutely obsessed. 

At first, it hadn’t even been his fault, how could he not be obsessed when Eddie was on life support for a week? When he had to go through hell to recover? Being planted at his bedside was only natural, especially since Steve was the one to save his life.

Then he got better, but Steve didn’t go anywhere. He was too attached by then, lost in the orbit of Eddie’s magnetic personality. He was hilarious, he was sweet, and he was a little weird. Besides the whole alternative look and nerd game obsessions, Eddie had some quirks. Like how he was obsessed with feeding the raccoons that lived behind the trailer park, or how he insisted on teaching Steve all about tarot cards, because, “If hell can live below Hawkins then these cards got a shot at being true.”

He was a little bit twitchy and fidgety, never fully able to keep still. He’d do little things without realizing it, fiddling with his rings while they walked, playing with Steve’s fingers when they lay together in bed, rapping his fingers against the wheel as he drove, he was always moving in some new way. Steve liked watching him do it, it was such a stark difference from those terrible days when he was still in a hospital bed, it helped to remind him that Eddie was here. He made it, he was safe. 

He was sensitive, and Steve had caught him tearing up more than once at a sappy movie or one of his insanely long fantasy novels. But he was unapologetic about it, always saying that bottling things up was for people who haven’t almost died. 

Steve didn’t mind any of it. In fact, he was kinda into it. He liked almost everything about the guy, and it was getting worse instead of better. The more time they spent together, the more Steve wanted it, craved it even. And Eddie was always more than happy to give him what he wanted and it was making Steve feel greedy. 

Because Steve wanted more. And he was pretty sure Eddie wanted more too. 

He knew what platonic love felt like, and whatever was going on between them wasn’t it. His heart didn’t start racing whenever Robin hugged him. He didn’t catch himself staring at her lips when she went on a rant. He wasn’t obsessed with her arms, or had daydreams about how those callused fingers would feel on his bare skin. 

He also didn’t fucking lose focus and start fantasizing about her hands when he thought about her. 

It wasn’t normal how he felt. It wasn’t even close to normal and Steve didn’t know how to feel about it. So he invited Robin over, because what else could he do? Talk to Eddie about his feelings and risk their friendship over his gay thoughts?

Yeah, no. 

She was barely through his front door when he blurted it out, “How did you know you were gay?”

She plopped down next to him, sitting on his feet with a cocked head. She didn’t ask for any clarification, or an explanation on why he would even ask that, she just launched into the answer, another thing Steve loved about her, “I’d say I figured it out around the third time I made out with my Farrah Fawcett poster.” 

Well that was…almost helpful, “So you didn’t know immediately?”

She narrowed her eyes at him, ignoring the question. “This is about Eddie, isn’t it?”

Steve groaned, staring up at the ceiling. Was it really that obvious?

“It’s pretty obvious,” Robin went on, like the weirdo could read his mind, “The two of you always look like you’re five seconds away from making out.”

“We’re not that bad.

She smirked, a small thing, “You’re right, you're worse.”

Steve kicked at her a little, but it only worked to make her laugh. 

“But I’m not…” Steve paused, struggling for the words,” Like that. Am I?” 

He didn’t think he was like that. It’s not like it was the first time he’d ever been close to a guy his age before, but none of his old friends or teammates had sparked anything in him. Eddie didn’t really spark anything either, more like…set him ablaze from the inside. In a way that no guy or girl ever had.

It felt like he had been smacked in the face with it completely out of nowhere. One day he’s hanging out with his best friend, laying on their bed while he waited for Eddie to get ready. He had just finished finding semi-clean clothes before turning his back to Steve. 

“I’m gonna change, so close your eyes,”

Steve hummed, stretching lazily out on the bed. He was in no hurry, they were just going on one of Eddie’s deals and he spent most of the time waiting in the passenger seat. Not the most exciting night. He let his eyes droop, but not all the way, silently tracking Eddie’s every move. He wasn’t sure why he hadn’t closed them, but by the time Eddie had his shirt off he had his full attention. 

He had seen them before, admired them even, living proof that Eddie had made it. But this was the first time Steve wanted to kiss them. It was the first time his mouth went dry at the sight of Eddie’s back, admiring the muscles under the skin.

He hadn’t been able to stop thinking about it since, and it happened a freaking month ago. 

Fuck, maybe he was gay.

Robin shrugged at him, “Having to ask if you like dudes is usually a sign that you like dudes.”

“But I don’t like dudes,” Steve whined, “I just want him. Doesn’t that count for something?”

Steve realized just how stupid that sounded the second the words left his mouth, but it was too late. Robin was already cackling, “Oh my god, you’re an Eddie-sexual!”

Steve kicked her a little harder, face red, “I am not!”

He absolutely was, but that didn’t mean he had to admit it. Robin wipes a tear from her eye, still grinning ear to ear, “If you want him so bad, why haven’t you done anything about it?”

Steve sighed, “Because what if he isn’t…like that?”

“But what if he is?”

“But what if he isn’t?”

Robin leaned in closer, her eyes going serious, “But what if he is? Steve, think about it for a second. Think about how he acts around you, are you telling me there’s nothing he does that shows he’s into you? Come on, dig deep.”

Steve pursed his lips, thinking. There were a few things that came to mind, “He…he likes to touch me a lot? I don’t know, it’s like little things, holding hands when we’re alone and stuff. Sometimes he’ll put his hand in my back pocket when we’re walking together, just to mess with me y’know?”

For a second Steve could swear he saw Robin’s eye twitch, “Go on.”

“And we um, kind of sleep together every night? And he’ll do this thing in bed where I’ll be against his chest right? And he’ll wrap his arms around me really tight and it feels so good and- Why are you looking at me like that?”

Robin stared at him, eyebrows up to her hairline, “Are you freaking kidding me right now?”

“What?”

“Steve, sweetie, that is beyond gay. That’s like…I don’t even know. The two of you are basically already dating, you realize that right?”

Steve could feel some hope building up in his chest, “You think?”

Robin scoffed. She looked like she was five seconds away from choking him, “Do I think? He gropes your ass while you walk and you’re seriously wondering if he’s interested? Babe, how did we get here? I know you're smarter than this.”

Steve laughed, confidence growing bigger by the second, “So you think I should do something?”

“If you don’t, I’ll be forced to kill you, I swear to God.”

Steve grinned. He sat up hugging Robin to his chest while she squealed at him to let go. He kissed the top of her hair, both of them giggling all the while, “I promise I’ll do something. God, what would I do without you?”

She smiled up at him, “You’d be a loser.”

Steve laughed, knowing that there was some truth in that statement. But it didn’t matter, his mind was made up. He didn’t know how he was gonna do it, but he was going to make that nerd his boyfriend by the end of the month.

An excerpt from an unfinished chapter of this fic

[bidokja]

hi, hope you're having a lovely day (night?) if you've read the sctir novel, does it explain why filial piety addicts waited eight years to kill Yoojin, or why instead of imprisoning him, his brother sentenced him to a life of loneliness, humiliation and poverty? sorry for troubling you

Thank you, my day's been very chill so far. I have read/am reading SCTIR, but while there is an answer to these questions, the first part is never stated like, explicitly, it's more something you have to get from clues. The second part is answered in both the novel and webtoon, but I know that the webtoon kinda rushed the explanation. I'll do my best to clarify!

For the first question: Why did the filial piety addicts wait eight years to (try to) kill Yoojin?

Basically, they'd spent those eight years trying to trick, bargain with, and wear down Yoohyun. They wanted him on their side, and were trying to use Yoojin as a bargaining chip. They didn't want to get on Yoohyun's bad side so they couldn't touch Yoojin openly. Basically, they kept saying join us and we will save your brother when the world ends. Yoohyun never really bought that though, and after eight years of this...a deadline of sorts was approaching. The FPAs couldn't afford to bargain with Yoohyun anymore, so they decided to risk it and force his hand. If they just kill Yoojin they could fully destroy Yoohyun's attachment to the world, and if they could manage to frame it as a freak accident then they wouldn't risk his ire either. This, of course, did NOT go to plan.

For the second question: Instead of imprisoning Yoojin, why did Yoohyun sentenced him to a life of loneliness, humiliation, and poverty?

The answer to this one is messy. It's because even though he's a "perfect" S-Class...Yoohyun was just a kid. He didn't want his brother to be in danger, but he didn't want his brother to not have his own life, but he didn't want his brother to do just anything and wind up hurt, but he couldn't risk his brother being so close and becoming a pawn for the FPAs, and his didn't want his brother to love him and keep coming after him, but he didn't want to stop loving his brother, and so on and so forth. There's an infinite many number of layers here, and in the end he made the choice he thought was safest for Yoojin at the time even if it would hurt a bit at first.

His goal was never, not for a single second, to humiliate Yoojin, or make him lonely, or leave him in poverty. His reasoning wasn't out of nowhere. If he drove a wedge between them, surely Yoojin would stop thinking about him...but he didn't. If he put distance between them, surely the media would stop focusing on his brother...but they didn't. If Yoojin needed money, surely he would go out and find a safe and average job away from him...but he didn't. If he berated him for getting injured in a low class dungeon, surely he would realize he should quit and go find safer work...but he didn't. If he acted coldly, surely Yoojin would move on and find someone else to care deeply for who would care for him back...but he didn't. If he cut ties, surely the Filial Piety Addicts wouldn't think Yoojin was an obstacle in their plans...

But they did.

And so here we are.

It's a tragic case of neither of them being able to communicate clearly with the other at the time, for various reasons.

[faux-ee]

So What if BSD Fyodor is Dead

Guys. I finished Stormbringer last night (finally) and had an epiphany. If Rimbaud can survive in the form of a singularity ghost in his ability space, and if Shibusawa's ability could trick him into thinking that he's still alive, why couldn't it be possible that all the mysteries around Fyodor (his height, his age, the nature of his ability, etc.) are because he's already dead?

Fyodor's weakness is that he has a weak composition, now I think the anemia is actually indicative of death. A lack of blood.

A friend of mine noticed that throughout the manga, Fyodor has been referring to himself as "Boku," which is not really proper for a grown man as it is more for young boys (boku no hero academia, for example). He should be calling himself "Watashi" if he's older than 15, and since Kyouka is 14, Fyodor definitely looks older than 15. Shibusawa also said Dostoevsky's "an old friend". Dazai met him once when he was younger. It's weird Fyodor insists on addressing himself like a teenage boy, unless he never aged mentally past that stage.

A lot of his talking in riddles could also be attributed to teenage behavior: from arbitrary statements like "breathing is sin, thinking is sin," to "this is fun" and "marvelous (素晴らしい)" which he repeated time and time again, lowkey reminding me of those ghosts repeatedly doing the old habits they had when they were alive.

Gogol brought Sigma to Meursault bcs one must know Fyodor's ability to kill him. Which means he isn't expecting the poison to kill Fyodor at all, or he had full confidence in Fyodor winning. Either way, if he truly wants to kill Fyodor himself, it's not very likely he'll simply just let the poison kill Fyodor. The latter is already weak bodily, so it doesn't make sense that he'll be immune to poison - who can't poison kill? Either ppl who have an antidote (which neither of fyodor & dazai has), or ppl who are already dead.

Also, Gogol's statement provides an important conclusion: Fyodor can't be killed any other way than knowing his ability. Fyodor's life will only truly come to an end after the mystery around his ability is unravelled. What if he, like Shibusawa, is a singularity who refused to be dead? When he said living is a sin, he didn't see himself as a sinner. Perhaps he really wasn't entitled to the sin called life.

So, if he's dead, why is Fyodor still seems to be alive and walking? I have two theories.

One, Fyodor's also a lab product, and like Chuuya, also has a clone. This could offer additional explanation as to why he was able to control Chuuya, as he would then have as deep knowledge of this kind of experiments as N.

Fyodor said, "I am crime, I am punishment." It means he only defines himself through his ability. Now this could be a result of trauma but also - I feel like every time Fyodor makes claims about his own ideal, it's kinda stiff. One sec he's saying that he hears the words of god, and the next he's saying "if god doesn't exist, then I am god". It feels very much like two different personalities: a servant and a master; and they coexist in him.

His clone, instead of dying, could have merged with him and provided young Fyodor's consciousness a physical form. The "god" is Fyodor's true self commanding everything behind the scenes, and since he's no longer corporeal, he could move in and out of prison and that could be an effective way of transferring info.

(After all, irl Dostoevsky wrote a novel The Double exploring a man's psychological breakdown and identity disorder, which is "the most Gogolesque of Dostoevsky's works" and explores how the pursuit of freedom turns into self-destructive tendency. I'm guessing Asagiri probably had decent knowledge about that book based on this.)

Two, Fyodor and Nikolai are set up to be foils/partners, and BSD partners' abilities/identities are sometimes indicative of each other. Rimbaud and Verlaine trading names, Chuuya being the "non-human" to Dazai's "tainted sorrow," Atsushi facing the Rashoumon dilemma upon his first appearance. Gogol was committing crimes and punishing himself with guilt. Fyodor, like Nikolai, is always wrapped in what we think is a cape - but it has buttons and perhaps should be worn another way, like an overcoat. What if Fyodor's ability protected his body like an overcoat? What if his very being is an overcoat - a fixed role assigned to him by society that he could not escape from, a savior, a man-god?

This might sound too abstract but the basic idea is that Fyodor's more an Ability created to serve a specific purpose than a living human being.

I'm afraid I have to end the meta here because I simply can't find more clues, but this theory strangely sit right with me. Thank you for reading to here.

[everythingelseisspokenfor]

Am I the only one who kinda wishes the confrontation scene with Sky and Pai played out a little differently? (And no it's not because Pai read Sky's diary. Man's problematic he's learning but he's problematic, and I've read the novel- i know the tv show is less toxic than the novel but i didn't expect too much of a change in that)

I just wish we actually got Sky to see Prapai cry. It would be so much more impactful for Sky to see Pai cry. For Sky to know that he has the capacity to wreck Prapai and has had that power over him for a while.

I wish they played into that more because the whole trope they've been playing is the Playboy turned devoted lover. Pai has been disarmingly flirty but the sincerity is what really let Sky fall for him (speaking of! I have a whole another rant for the party, maybe another post) .

We as the audience know what Sky said devastated Pai. Sky doesn't. And that bothers me. That child deserves all the love and adoration in the world. He has been through a lot. He is rightfully cautious about giving his heart. So, he hurt Pai before Pai could hurt him. He is trying to get the upper hand because he was stupid enough to believe in Pai. It wasn't the right thing to do but it's understandable.

But can you imagine? If instead of Pai being cool collected and reading the notes that Sky had, the roles were reversed? We see a initially shocked Sky who goes back to his practiced poker face when he sees Pai.

If we got Pai just heartbroken waiting there for an answer. Asking if this was all just another game. Something for him to see and think he had actually made progress with Sky- that it was all just a joke to "teach him a lesson".

Sky tries to take the notebook away from him as he dodges because while Pai was waiting he had nothing to do except etch those words into his heart even if they were just lies. And so he starts repeating them. Begging sky to disagree with him. Begging for a sign that they had something real. And as the words go he chokes up.

The tears won't stop despite how much he doesn't want Sky to see him cry. He knew he'd given up his heart to him free to be played with, he just didn't belive that the Sky he'd come to love would ever do this to him. The words eventually stop and he's unable to read more as he places the book down asking one last time if all of it was just a joke.

Can you imagine sky's resolve slowly breaking as he bends down to reach for Pai and then Pai claiming "you know what, you're right. I don't like you anymore" and as Sky is about to protest he continues "because i love you."

Can you imagine Sky's reaction to that? Can you imagine him breaking down after that? Knowing he hurt someone who very clearly didn't mean to hurt him?

Can you??? Coz I can and it's eating me up that we didn't get it.

(Side note: Fort and Peat are sooooo great I'm absolutely in love with their acting and whoever else on Tumblr spoke about the urge to steal MAME's characters for their own story- i get it. I wanna do that now thanks)