#🍡 | request

[odxrilove]

☆ JEONGHAN BOYFRIEND TEXTS

pairing: jeonghan x gf!reader

contents/warnings: established relationship, fluff, swearing... requested by anon!

back to masterlist!

taglist: @0x1lovebot @fairybinie @odetoyeonjun @sensitively-taken @pockyandme @soobin-chois @lolalee24 @junityy @kaimal @laylasbunbunny @jaeyunverse @enhacolor @honglynights @starry-mins @bibinnieposts @yoonzin0 @raevyng @hoeforcheol @pearlygraysky @4xiaojun @viscade @kikohao @enluv @smilehui @starshuas @instabull @atrirose @dokyeomkyeom @todorokiskitten

please do not copy, repost or steal any of my work. all content belongs to @odxrilove

[bleach-your-panties]

OH BET! For the smut prompt game and because of reasons, what about Amajiki and “We’ve been at it like rabbits, how are you still horny?!”

Thank you for this request, anon-chan!

Prompts here and here. 18+ MDNI.

A shiver ran through your overstimulated body at the feeling of Tamaki’s sharp nose poking at your jugular.

His arms held a tight grip around your waist while his canines grazed over your collarbones.

Your sweat-slickened bodies were so close together, warm and sticky from your multiple combined orgasms.

Pussy spasming around his long, slender cock that was still shoved deep inside of you, already hardening again just from tasting your flesh against his hungry tongue.

“T-Tama..babe..” You tried to wedge yourself out of his hold, but Tamaki was having none of that. He only gripped you tighter and began bouncing you along his cock once again.

You threw your head back against his shoulder with a loud moan and fisted a thick clump of his dark blue locks in your hand.

That only made him whimper and moan louder than you had. He loved when you were rough with him.

One muscular arm loosened from your waist only for two slender fingers to slide down your belly towards your pulsating button.

“So wet for me, bunny. You're such a good, slutty girl. Cumming over my cock and fingers so many times, making a mess of our bed.” 

He circled those expert fingers around your clit in a face-paced circle motion while thrusting harder, making your thighs slap against his. It was so loud, hot, and downright erotic.

“Oh, Tamaki, fuck!” 

He angled his dick right against your spot and before you knew it you were gushing over him again, your eyes seeing nothing but a blanket of black as you slumped down against his chest.

His dick slipped out of your hole and plopped against your thigh with a wet squilch. Tamaki had been stuffing you full for the past two hours at the very least. You didn't even know how you were still conscious at this point.

“Tama…we’ve been at it like rabbits! How are you still horny?!” 

The indigo-eyed male’s cheeks flushed crimson along with the rest of his normally pale, milky skin. 

In apology, he began peppering soft, wet pecks across the expanse of your neck and shoulders.

“P-probably because of the rabbit meat s-stew that you made for dinner…” 

Your pupils blew wide at the realization.

“Oh…oh…You're right…”

[dalgifilms]

𝒯𝖺𝗉 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖧𝖤𝖠𝖱𝖳 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝖺 𝖬𝗌𝗀 ▚☘️ ⃝⊹

like 4 a MSG▒🏧⃤◌◍

L4 𖥔 Moots ᭄ᬽ🍏⃞⃨

ℒ𝗂𝗄𝖾 2 𝖻𝖾 𝖬𝗈𝗈𝗍s + 𝖯𝗈𝗌𝗌𝗂𝖻𝗅𝖾 𝖣𝖬𝖲 ᭩ᬻ⃯﹌⃟🥑

# K𝒾𝖲𝖲4𝖸♡︎𝖴⍣⋱⌖🌐 ⃝⊹

ⓘ ⌖⃨ ⸻ 𝒞𝗋𝗎𝗌𝗁 𝒪𝗇 𝒴𝗈𝗎❞ 🧺

⍮▚⍣⃮ℛ𝖾𝖽 𝒮𝗍𝗋𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝒮𝗈𝗎𝗅𝗆𝖺𝗍𝖾﹌●◍◝₊🪞

Some couple captions and l4dm captions! Enjoy them <3

[cupidscrule]

Fluff !! Hi hi so reader making satoru cry because he's pretty like that

Pearl

Anon ily for this !! This was kinda rushed it's not that good but I needed to put somethin' out so I hope you like it ;3!!

Warning - none , slight angst? Touch starved Satoru <3

400 wrd

Touch starved. Two words that perfectly fit your boyfriend, growing up he had always been 'different' and special, as he was a teen and adult he always kept in a close group of people, he was never really loved like how others were. No one gave him affection like that, so he always was physically distant in your relationship, he would almost stiffin when you came up and hugged him.

It was just another day, you were relaxing with Satoru at home since there weren't any important missions, and he deserved a small break from his students. He was sitting on the couch, his lips slightly parted, wearing those pretty sunglasses legs resting on the table, he seemed to be just day dreaming about god knows what.

"Mm you're so pretty" you mumbled quietly, glancing over at him, he didn't respond seemingly just dissociated.

You feel a small smirk crawl onto your face before planting a kiss on his cheek, y'know to get his attention and all.. he finally perked up looking over at you, smile gone, at first you thought you messed up so instinctively you went in to go hug him, gripping onto the soft fabric of his shirt. Then unexpectedly you feel him pull on *you* his head in the crook of your neck, almost like a sad little puppy.

"Hun you okay?" You say pulling off at him and looking at his sad face, tears swelling up in his eyes. Mumbling something inaudible, almost looked cute like this, cute but you knew it was wrong to not comfort him.

"Baby tell me what's wrong? Why are you crying?" You say bringing a hand up to cup his cheek, drawing small circles with your thumb gently.

He doesn't reply instead just flopping his weight onto you, his head resting on your chest. He looked disheveled, but he kept inching closer. You don't even know why he's acting like this right now, he's never clingy, but right now all he wants- no need is just touch. And well who were you to decide to deny him that?

Stroking his white hair, as the tears stop, head still planted firmly on you almost nuzzling.

" I love you.."

[smuttysweets]

Hey so this is my first time requesting and i’m kinda scared but do you think you could do basically anything neito monoma x reader? im so in love with this man and i can hardly find any fics of him! it can be anything you want, angst, fluff, smut, idc. you don’t have to do this request if it makes you uncomfortable but i just wanted to ask!

( hello! im so so sorry for this kate submission. i’ve been making a lot of side blogs and not actually posting on any of them. <\3 I’m glad you sent an order/request to me as your first time. Don’t worry pookie I got you!! )

‧˚₊•┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ ୨୧ ┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈•‧₊˚⊹

⊹ ࣪ ˖ My Side Character ࣪ ˖ ⊹

🍡☕️ ꒱ Neito Monoma x Fem! Reader ! ꒱ ( ☕️ with some🥛)

┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

⟢ Neito Monoma. A former classmate, sidekick, and roommate of yours. You’ve known him ever since your guys first year at UA. You sat next to him in class. His hysteric personality somehow caught your eye. You’ve had a secret crush on him for years. As you both grew together and went through hell together the relationship that grew between you is something you both could never have with anyone else.

⟢ After a long night of patrolling you both make your way to your shared luxury apartment. “Amazing work during patrol today Monoma. You deserve most of the credit for that fight!” You chuckle out. He dramatically moves his hair, that has grown out a bit throughout the years, out of his face. “Hah. I know~ You wouldn’t be amazing without me!” you giggle “Of course.” You both make it to the room and go your separate ways to freshen up.

⟢ After a nice long shower you choose to wear a shirt that has a logo of your hero name printed on it with a chibi version of your face. You just choose a white skirt to wear for your bottoms. You walk through the hallway looking for your roommate. “Neitoo!” You say loud enough for him to hear you. Wherever he is. You walk into the kitchen and living room area and you see him. He looks lost in thought. “Hey are you okay?” He turns slowly. A forced smile slowly creeps up on his face. “I’m fine. Just thinking about today’s patrol.” His voice is low. Did something happen?

⟢ “Monoma,” you walk next to him and you softly grab his hand. “if there’s something wrong I’m here to listen.” The ‘smile’ on his face disappears. And he looks down. “I was just thinking about how..” he pauses. “About how I feel like I’m always on the side.. What you said earlier about me getting more credits. I greed for appreciation and some form of approval from the public. For years I have been told how my quirk isn’t the best. And how I could never become a hero with my quirk. I feel like a side character in my own life.”

⟢ Tears form at the corner of his eyes. You frown and give him a big hug. “Neito, I think so highly of you. And I have for years. You have been by my side for so long. You are such a big inspiration to me. And I appreciate you so so much.” you start to blush. “I- I’ve liked you ever since our first year graduation. I know this confession is out of no where.. but I!—“ Monoma cuts you off with a deep kiss. Your eyes widen. When his lips leave yours he looks at you with ‘fuck me’ eyes. “You idiot. I’ve liked you ever since I saw you sit next to me on our first day. You should’ve confessed earlier!”

⟢ You blush and hit him playfully. “Hey! A lot was happening during the time I liked you. And I was confused with my feelings!—“ He kisses you again. “Is that your way to tell me to stop talking?!” “Your words! Not mine~” He starts kissing you all over as you both start giggling in each others kisses. “I want you so bad. Pretty please?~” You know this is his way of teasing you. “Mmmh! Don’t use that voice on me it’s embarrassing..” You cover your face as it turns bright red. He chuckles and pics you up bridal style. “Let go to my bedroom~”

‧˚₊•┈┈┈┈┈ MINORS DNI ┈┈┈┈┈┈•‧₊˚⊹

- time goes by ! monoma is between your legs as you’re on your back on his bed.

⟢ Monoma’s tongue goes deeper and deeper into your cunt as your legs shake uncontrollably. “M-Monoma! It’s too muchh! I c-can’t anymore.. I want you!~” He laughs in your cunt in response. His tongue slips out. “What was that~? You want my cock? Naughty girl..” His dirty talk sends shivers down your spine. He sits up from your cunt and he grab’s his cock. “You want this?” he swings it, temptingly. “Mhm! Please! I want it so badd!~” You feel his cock slap on your sensitive clit, making you shiver and moan.

⟢ He places his cock to your entrance. “I’ll go slow, okay?” His tip slowly slips in with a wet sound that was music to your ears. The feeling of finally feeling him after wanting him for so long felt like heaven. ��Ah!~ S-so good! Deeper.. Deeper!” he immediately listens to your commands, slowly entering himself more and more, making you squirm. When he finally makes it to the base groans and moans exit both of your mouths. He was so deep inside. “I-I’m.. fuck.. I’m gonna start moving okay?” He slowly exits all the way to the tip and slowly pushes himself back inside making you moan in pleasure.

⟢ The friction, the deep penetration, you basically felt like you were sinking into the mattress. You face falls back as you grip the sheets. “You feel so good baby~ Is.. Is it okay if I call you baby?” You blush more than you already are. “Pl-please! Call me baby! Call me yours! I wanna— be yours!” Your mind is all foggy. The feeling of your orgasm continues to build up.

⟢ “N-Neito.. I’m gonna c—cum! Please.. Cum with me!!” You plead as tears of pleasure start to roll down your cheeks. “Okay.. I’m.. I’m cumming! AH~~!” “D-dammit!!” You both cum at the same. You both kiss each other and moan into each other’s mouths. You guys makeout for a good minute. You both depart your lips with heavy breathing. Going back in fourth for breaths and kisses.

⟢ Monoma stops. “Fuck.. I feel like I’m gonna pass out..” he flops down beside you. You let out a chuckle and pat his head. “And.. thank you. Y/N.” you blush again. You kiss his forehead and cuddle up to him. “I love you!” “I love you more..” you can tell he’s already fallen asleep due to his soft snoring. “Goodnight, Neito..” you fall asleep quickly, the last thing you see being him.

( sorry if this doesn’t seem like something he’d do i don’t analyze his character that much like i do with my favs :( <\3 )

‧˚₊꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒦꒷꒦︶︶︶︶‧₊˚⊹

[proselfship-huggies]

Can I have one from Kinger from The Amazing Digital Circus? (I'm OK with sharing btw, he deserves all the love he can get especially considering the latest episode)

"A hug? You must really like me!" *hug* "I don’t get many of these, you know! This is great!" "You’re special to me... I really enjoy being around you. You make this place a lot more fun! Let’s do this more often! I could really get used to all this happiness!" - Kinger

[kaq3yma]

ello, author of kaq3yma, qeena here! im here for one sole reason and that is to ask a favor to you guys (mutuals/followers) if you guys happen to have any fic ideas, you can request them to me on my ask box! im really out of ideas but i really wanted to write something huweee ˶‾᷄ ⁻̫ ‾᷅˵ so please don't be shy, go crazy and drop anything for any character of blue lock, wind breaker, haikyuu, tokyo revengers or gokurakugai! thats what im specialize in anw kekekeke but please beware, i do NOT write explicit suggestive contents such as nsfws. okay that's all thank uuuu! see you on my dango shop ask box <3 🩷🤍💚

[milkloafy]

I HAVE NEVER WRITTEN FOR AYATO BEFORE BUT EVERY FIBER IN MY BEING IS TELLING ME I NEED TO RN ‼️

[sacrees]

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⏝⏝ SILAS && DUST ⏝⏝

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀request status: closed (7/10)

[odxrilove]

☆ JAY BOYFRIEND TEXTS

pairing: enhypen jay x f!reader

warnings + a/n: established relationship, cursing, 1kys joke, mention of "injuries". requested!

back to masterlist!

taglist: @0x1lovebot @fairybinie @cherriespopsicle @odetoyeonjun @pockyandme @soobin-chois @lolalee24 @sensitively-taken @junityy @kaimal @laylasbunbunny @jaeyunverse @enhacolor @honglynights @starry-mins @bibinnieposts @yoonzin0 @4xiaojun @pointlessapple @equalheart @angelyeo-hyj @enluv @notseiu @dokyeomkyeom @isoobie

please do not copy, repost or steal any of my work. all content belongs to @odxrilove

[bleach-your-panties]

#3 of the six sexy word prompts with Amajiki, please?

Only because you said please- 🫢

Minors, go away. Only click 'keep reading' if you consent to reading some nasty, freaky shit.

----

“Keep looking, Tama. Please baby, look at how pretty you look.”

You breathed hot puffs of air against Tamaki’s already sweaty neck. 

The shy hero whined against your neck, still absolutely refusing to look into the mirror situated right in front of your shared bed.

Tamaki couldn't bear to look lest he make a complete fool of himself and shoot off inside of you just at the image of you squatting over his dick.

“I can't…I can't, bunny, please…ahh!”

You grabbed a handful of his dark, indigo hair and jerked his head up. With the same hand, you laid a quick slap across his cheek before pressing your lips to it.

“I said to look, Tamaki.”

Shakily, deep midnight blue eyes  flickered up to the mirror and you could feel Tamaki’s dick pulsate inside of you.

“See how good you look filling me up, baby? I love you so much, Tamaki.”

With a soft moan, he sighed and brought his strong arms around your waist to get a better hold to bounce you up and down on him.

“Oh fuck, Tama, right there!” You gripped his left bicep but he tossed your arm off.

A surprised squeak escaped your lips, not expecting for Tamaki to suddenly  grab you behind the neck and manhandle you over the edge of the bed.

You heard some wet, squishy sounds before feeling several slimy, muscular appendages tighten around your waist and hoist you up onto your knees.

Cheeks lit aflame with embarrassment, you tried to hold your head down but four pale fingers and a thumb gripped your jaw.

“Now, now, that’s not fair, bunny…you said to look, remember?”

You did as your lover asked and brought your own e/c eyes to meet his in the mirror.

“Good girl. Now stay still while I wreck all of your little bratty holes…” 

A scream echoed around the room as Tamaki transformed both his fingers and tongue into multiple, slithering, maroon tendrils.

----

ʳᵉᵇˡᵒᵍˢ ᵃʳᵉ ᵃᵖᵖʳᵉᶜⁱᵃᵗᵉᵈ ᵃⁿᵈ ⁱ ˡᵒᵛᵉ ᶜᵒᵐᵐᵉⁿᵗˢ🫶🏽

[dalgifilms]

Seoul-like bios ,, 🛫

⎙ ±𑪓⃖ ❝︣ ℒ𝗈𝖼𝖺𝗍𝖾𝖽 𝗂𝗇 𝖩𝖾𝗃𝗎 ! 🛫 ⸭‑⎺ 🍡

⎘ 🥒 ❝ Ⓡ︎𝒾𝖦𝗂𝖭𝖠𝖫 𝒟♡︎𝖫𝖫𝖤 ⌖ • ᭼𑪓𑪖𑪋𑩑

❝ 𓈃 🧖🏻‍♀️ 𝄂 𝒮𝖾𝗈𝗎𝗅 '𝗌 𝖡𝗎𝗇𝗇𝗒 𝖦𝗂𝖱𝖫 ◌◍▍⃮⃛ 🐇 ᭼ ⌖

🍪 ❝⃮𓇿 𝒮 '𝗆𝗈𝗋𝖾𝗌 𝖢𝗈𝗈𝗄𝗂𝖾𝗌 ,, ﹅◌◉𑪓⁺▔넪 🇰🇷

bios were inspired by @sugaryfresca !

tysm for requesting!

[cupidscrule]

Drop more jjk requests in the inbox bbs❤️/very very forced ^_^

[smuttysweets]

HSBJKWQDB HII YOU SEEM SUPER COOL AND I LOVE YOUR EVENT IDEAA

✧ — Character : Bakugou Katsuki — 🍭🍡🧋

( self insert bio: ⊱ Kaeda Aizawa. ⊱ Geo (she can manipulate rocks and metals ⊱ Kaeda goes by Kae, Hero name is Rockstar, Bakugou calls her chili pepper bc she loves spicy foods (Indian genes smh), she has green eyes, black hair, brown skin, loves to sing and is like mina and Kirishima's personalities into one - she's also Aizawa's adoptive daughter)

( request: Katsuki and Kae go to the Hero's Gala together in matching outfits and the tabloids are all over it 👀 )

( AHHHH this is so cuteee!! I love hero gala prompts and I LOVE writing for Bakugou. Your self insert seems so cool I might draw her when I get a chance!! )

‧˚₊•┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ ୨୧ ┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈•‧₊˚⊹

⊹ ࣪ ˖ Hearts on Fire ࣪ ˖ ⊹

🍭🍡🧋 ꒱ Katsuki Bakugou x Kaeda Aizawa ! ꒱

꒱ fluff, self insert, character owned by: @queenpiranhadon , June Challange!

┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

⟢ Today is the day of the 2024 hero gala. Dynamite and Rockstar, or, Katsuki and Kaeda’s, relationship hasn’t been shown much to the public. Of course there are people with their ‘theories’. People talk about it all over the internet. But there was never a confirmed answer but the chemistry was there.

⟢ Kaeda hums as she perfectly and slowly finishing her makeup, not even noticing Bakugou, leaning on the door frame with his hands crossed. “You look good.” Kaeda slightly jumps from the sudden voice that cuts the silence like a knife. Kaeda turns around in her rolling chair. “Thanks Katssuki.” she looks him up and down a slight blush appearing on her face. “I always forget how good you look in formal wear!”

⟢ Katsuki, matching with Kaeda, is wearing a black tuxedo with a dark green collared shirt, close to the same color as his gauntlets. A black tie that Kaeda had to tie up for him. Kaeda is wearing a a dress right below the knees. It sparkles when reflected on light. Accessories including a necklace and bracelet matching her hero costume aesthetic.

⟢ Kae stands up and Katsuki walks toward her. “I want to kiss you so bad..” Katsuki says as he softly grabs her chin and raises her head up more. “If you want people to talk about your lips matching my lip tint be my guest!” He chuckles at this. He puts a soft pec on her lips. “I can wait until we’re alone.” Kaeda smiles softly. “Then lets get out of her so we can get this over with! I know you hate these yearly galas!”

‧˚₊•┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈•‧₊˚⊹

⟢ As soon as the limo carrying Kaeda and Katsuki pulls up paparazzi immediately pull out their cameras and microphones. The door that leads to the red carpet swings open. Katsuki steps out, grabbing Kaeda’s hand to help her get out carefully, some of their old classmates who are now pros following behind. “Dynamite! Rockstar! Is it true that you two have a relationship more than just being work partners?!” “Rockstar, you look amazing! Look at the camera!” “Dynamite and Rockstar having matching outfits?! Are you guys dating??”

⟢ Katsuki absolutely hates paparazzi’s. Majority of videos of him with big crowds of paparazzi is just him screaming at cameras and mics to back the fuck up. Kaeda doesn’t really mind. She’ll answer some questions from time to time and she is just naturally perfect for the camera. The light from the flashes bounces of her black hair so nicely. Its like her emerald eyes glimmer when giving any serious eye contact. She was just like that.

⟢ As they finally enter in the first person Kaeda looks for like every year is her father, Eraser Head. Or Aizawa. “You both look great.” He compliments. “Thanks old man.” Kaeda laughs. “Thanks dad!”

‧˚₊•┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈•‧₊˚⊹

⟢ Kae and Kats lay comfortably in bed together. Kaeda scrolling on random articles online. And Katsuki reading over recent reports. Kaeda scrolls down on something related to the hero gala: “Hero Gala 2024: Dynamite and Rockstar Matching outfits at the Hero Gala! Communities go Crazy!” Kaeda chuckles. “Kats,” he looks up. “Look at this!” He grabs the phone and you can see how his reaction fades into slight anger and embarrassment. “Get that ‘outta my face!” He pushes the phone to Kaeda’s chest as he grabs the pillow that used to support Kaeda’s head hitting her face. “Katsukii!!”

( a/n : i feel as if i could’ve done better with this but i’ve been going through a lot recently </3 )

‧˚₊꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒦꒷꒦︶︶︶︶‧₊˚⊹

[proselfship-huggies]

Hello!!

Would it be possible to get a hug?

I have a number of F/Os and some are niche, so could I give a short list and have you choose whichever you feel most comfortable with?

-Professor Snape from the HP movies

-Max Jägerman from Nerdy Prudes Must Die

-Logan/The Worst Wolverine from Deadpool and Wolverine specifically

-Warren the Eagle from DHMIS

or -The Twelfth Doctor from Doctor Who

"A hug, huh?... Alright, come here." *hug* "You know I don’t do this kinda thing often. But… I don’t mind it. With you. You’ve always been there, and I guess I’ve grown pretty damn fond of you. I love you, in case I haven’t made that clear... " - Logan

[yowyowyaoi]

I don’t know if you do request but would do one where Hidan acts like a big brother to Deidara & Itachi.

Please and thank you

I tried 😞

*Hidan walks into the living room, where Deidara and Itachi are sitting on the couch*

Hidan: *plops himself between them* Good morning, little brothers!

Deidara: … huh?

Itachi: “Little brothers”?

Hidan: Yeah, fuckers! See, if this Akatsuki thing is ‘sposed to be a family like leader’s always going on about, then that means I’m your big brother! I’m older than both of you!

Itachi, indignantly: You’ve only got a few months on me, Hidan.

Deidara: And I’m pretty sure that I’M more mature than you, hm!

Itachi: Debatable.

Hidan: Anyways, I’m prepared to take on the duties of a big bro. I even made you guys breakfast!

Deidara: Is THAT what the horrible burning smell was?!

Hidan: I’ll cook for you, I’ll fix ya up when you’re hurt, and I’ll be here to give you guys the guidance and advice that I know ya both need!

Deidara: So does that mean that we can talk to you about anything, hm?

Hidan: *puts his arms around Deidara and Itachi’s shoulders* That’s right, little bros! Anything you want answered, you just come to Big Bro Hidan!

Itachi: I have a question, Hidan-Nii. If there is a God, and he created us all with free will, why does he supposedly send us to hell for doing things that he considers “bad”? Isn’t that setting us up for failure? And if he already knows everything that’s going to happen before it happens, so he knows when we’re going to sin, then what’s the point of anything at all? Doesn’t that mean that —

Hidan: Er … er … D-Deidara! Do YOU have a question??

Deidara: Yeah, actually. It’s about sex. See, me and Sasori are getting pretty serious, and I think we might be ready to —

Hidan: What the hell is this?! You guys aren’t —

*Tobi runs in*

Tobi: Hidan! Hidan! Can you be Tobi’s big brother too?!

Deidara, under his breath: Aren’t you like, 30??

Itachi, also under his breath: 31.

Hidan, not hearing them: Sure, kid! What do you need help with?

Tobi: There’s this guy in the next village, he pushed Tobi down and stole his ice cream cone …

Hidan: *stands up* My precious lil bro getting bullied?! Not on my watch! C’mon you three, all of you come down there and watch me, and see what a real big bro looks like!

*later*

Tobi, carrying a new ice cream cone: You sure showed him, nii-san!

Hidan, being carried in pieces by Deidara and Itachi: … I’m not so sure I’m cut out for this, guys.