#⌜running on caffeine⌟ °﹂⋯﹁。tweek

[stmulnts-a]

@gvesnofux​  :                “Oh no you DON’T”

Tweek had, just a few minutes ago, gotten word that Cartman and his crew were talking some shit, and dammit he wasn’t just going to let them get away with it. To hell with screwing off, Eric needed a black eye. But after being yanked back by his collar, complete with a surprised yelp and a stumble backwards, his proverbial rolled - up sleeves had quickly fallen back down his arms.

...Okay, fine. Craig was inherently right. Fighting wasn’t going to solve anything.

“I still think he deserves it.” Said, though, while no longer actively leaving Craig’s side to scout the halls. “I mean, I know he’s just looking for reactions, he always is, but jesus christ, he can’t just keep getting away with his bullshit. I’m sick of him acting like a big shot just ‘cause everyone lets him run his stupid mouth.”

[stmulnts-a]

               ⋯⋯⋯     With the click of his seat belt, Tweek settled more into the passenger seat. Just to roll his eyes at Stan's teasing. Though it was likely a bit more lighthearted than Stan's was, not that he'd noticed it when he walked up. “Soooo sorry, captain. Next time, I'll make sure not to get a bigass coffee stain on the next band tee I get my hands on.”

The positive demeanor quickly shifted when Stan mentioned 'the shit he used to drink'. But who could blame him? Finding out you've been drinking something drug - laced your whole life could screw anyone up, let alone someone with anxiety as bad as his.

Tweek shrunk in his seat, hands coming up to tug Craig's hat lower over his forehead, pressing his hair forward over his eyes. “...Could make a cup of coffee out of homemade fertilizer and it'd be better than what I used to drink, what's your point?”

stan's eyes roll at the sight of the blue hat, but he bit his tongue. he didn't like craig, but he didn't mind tweek. really, all stan knew about him was that he was kind of freaky as a kid ━ but he was always cool. part of stan knew that he was taking a leap of faith with this. so he lifted his head, gave tweek a wave as he got into the passenger seat, and offered a polite smile. he put the car into drive, the exhaust much too loud for the neighborhood.

            ❝ no big deal. don't think you're gonna fit in at hot topic with that on, though. they might tell you that you're not emo enough. ❞

stan teased, his polite smile turning into a shit-eating grin. he leaned back into his seat some, and gave a laugh.

            ❝ man, i can't say harbucks is good coffee but . . . probably better than the shit you used to drink. ❞

[shhh-secret-time]

Kyle Broflovski

26 y.o (He/Him)

Soul Synergy: Written on your palm is what your soulmate is thinking

Headcanons:

☆ Going to college on a full scholarship and with his help from his parents

☆ Still works part time at Tweek Bros Coffee, he wants to earn his own way in life

》 This feeds his caffeine addiction

☆ He still plays basketball, it helps him blow off steam

☆ Has a habit of piling to much on his plate

》 Stan usually has to remind him to take time for himself, forcing him to relax

☆ Probably tried to major in law like his dad but at some point he decided he really hated it

☆ Switches to something like English and General Classes for now.

》 I can see him becoming an Author! (I'm projecting)

☆ He tries to visit home often, holidays, birthdays, and on breaks!

☆ Does everything in his power to NOT talk about school. It's the last thing he wants to think about and he doesn't want to make his mother stress

☆ He and Stan live closer to campus, they went halfsies on an apartment together

》 Kyle cooks -> Stan does the dishes

》 Kyle handles paying rent -> Stan handles the handiwork around the house

☆ Will participate in Stan's board game nights if he has the time

☆ Although he loves D&D night and will not miss a session if he can help it. (I'm projecting)

》 I like to think he eventually becomes a DM the more he takes writing classes. I see those two going hand and hand

☆ He started carrying the lighter when Stan picked up smoking and it's just always been in his pocket

☆ Comes in handy when he smokes weed

》 I don't see him as the kind of guy who buys it or owns a bong/bowl/whatever, but I think he'll smoke if offered. Anything to just relax.

☆ Because of that he always carries an inhaler for Stan. He knows his friend hasn't had an asthma attack since they were kids, but just in case

☆ Also brings little bottles of water, enough for the other three. (Even Cartman if he can convince the guy to even look at water.)

☆ I didn't draw it but he's definitely got an EpiPen for sure.

》 He's the mom friend, I don't know what you expected

☆ Carries his glasses in the case, but he can't keep his glasses clean at all

》 Somehow his phone is immaculate, baffling really

☆ Looks at his palm often, so he started wearing gloves again

》 He gets distracted to easily with it

☆ The font on his palm is golden, looks like ink melting when it changes

☆ The closer his soulmate is to him, the quicker the words change.

》 If he thinks about it too much, he panics because what if he starts thinking something stupid and his soulmate laughs?

》 After a while he stops caring and just accepts that it is what it is.

☆ He's very protective of his hands because of it, often keeping his hands in his pockets if he's not wearing his gloves

》 More like he's protective over his soulmates thoughts.

His hand finds the silver necklace around his neck, the pointed star of David digs into his palm. The blunt ends of each point reminds him to breath. He turns it over a few times, doing the same with the lighter in his pocket.

He catches it out of the corner of his eye, the font on his palm gleams and twists. Running down his pale skin like watercolor does a canvas.

'Kyle! I love you!'

Kyle let's out a little breath, it dissolves into a chuckle. That breath takes the tight feeling in his chest with it. The beautiful font leaves room for a smile.

"I love you too." He whispers to the palm, placing a kiss over the words.

(Here's the blank version! ♡ )

[11x13kyle]

microceleb au coffee orders?

kyle: iced latte, probably puts in sweetener himself because he doesn’t trust the barista to not make it too sweet. always gets oat milk because he’s definitely lactose intolerant

stan: frappuccino but iced mocha when he’s on tour, giving someone a coffee run his order, or when he feels randomly insecure about being a grown man ordering a milkshake at a coffee shop. also oat milk but it’s not for health reasons he’s just gay. he got into it during a 2 week vegan phase and just never stopped.

cartman: orders whatever tastes the least like coffee, so like those comically sweet frappuccinos or normal coffee but with like 6 pumps of caramel. he gets regular milk and thinks anyone who gets alternative milk is a pussy.

kenny: black coffee, maybe with creamer if he’s feeling whimsical. he wants to maximize the amount of caffeine in his drink as much as he can. he’s also just weird about food so this very much extends to coffee.

craig: never drinks coffee in front of people because he can only actually enjoy it if it tastes nothing like coffee and just straight up vanilla. he can’t risk being absolutely torn to shreds for this so he keeps his order on the down low and just takes those caffeine pills if he REALLY needs to be awake.

tweek: exclusively black coffee. he also doesn’t get coffee at shops if he can avoid it and prefers to make his own because he doesn’t trust other people making his drinks. wonder why that could be!

tolkien: iced latte, probably with some flower add on like lavender or rose. preference for soy milk but isn’t all that picky, milk is milk and coffee is coffee to him. when someone asks if he wants them to pick up a coffee for him he shrugs and goes “get me whatever idc” and this drives people INSANE. also prefers to make his coffee at home but for reasons unrelated to trauma and completely related to him having an incredible espresso machine.

clyde: not a coffee guy but is unashamed of it. he orders hot chocolate at coffee shops in any weather and says it loud and proud. coffee also makes his stomach hurt so he doesn’t wanna deal with that unlike some people (kyle).

jimmy: iced americano. got it for the first time on accident because he ordered it without knowing what it was to seem cultured and smart and then decided he never wanted to put milk in his coffee again. he’s also a big fan of just getting a tall bottle of cold brew and drinking it in like 3 minutes flat and someone not getting a stomachache.

butters: he makes sure to stay on top of when every seasonal or limited drink comes out so he can get them IMMEDIATELY. he makes a huge deal about getting his first pumpkin spice latte of the season every fall when it comes out. orders hot coffee in any weather like a freak.

wendy: iced latte, no sugar, just almond milk and coffee. she loves to order an iced latte and sit in a coffee shop for like 4 hours on her grindset just typing away on her computer, usually orders like 2-3 more in the time she’s there and leaves trembling like a scared chihuahua.

[riseuplight]

south park zombie apocalypse au where tweek and craig get split up. tweek boards himself up in the coffee shop but despite his best efforts gets bit anyway

in a panicked attempt to stave off the transformation he raids the coffee beans and as a result is addicted as a zombie too

which sucks but the stimulant of the caffeine (""caffeine"") means his rotting brain receptors run fast enough to let him function normally, leaving him fully functional. he's tried this for other zombies but the ""caffeine"" just makes them sick and rabid— his body's used to it

do think he lacks many memories though as a result of the deterioration. still anxious

craig's still human though. they run into eachother. wacky hijinks ensue

idk i should write a fic or something if anyone likes this at all 😭 or maybe if no one likes it i could do it anyway. do whatever you want forever right

[stmulnts-a]

               ⋯⋯⋯     A quiet little whine escaped Tweek's throat, his hands letting go of Craig's shirt to instead hug tight around his waist. He couldn't stop himself from sniffling, either. But he could visibly hide the fact that he was tearing up, if only by nuzzling more into Craig's shoulder. “I‒ You really mean all that?” Of course he meant it, Tweek knew that. That voice in the back of his head, though, its nagging was louder than the logic at the moment. “...sorry. I mean. I love you too, Craig..”

                       ☽✧☾  Craig wrapped his arms around Tweek, holding him tight, staying quiet for a moment. He...genuinely hated Tweek's parents for the horrible shit they'd done to him, the lasting damage they had done to someone who was far too good for them. They didn't deserve him. "You aren't ugly, Tweek. Not in any way. The sores and other bullshit, it's temporary. We'll do what we can to help it clear up better so that you are more comfortable, but you're fucking gorgeous and precious and I love you so much, no matter what..."

[maximuswolf]

Pyrex Percolator

Pyrex Percolator I already know I’m going to get flack for this, but I’ve come to love my Pyrex Percolator that came into my life recently. There’s something meditative about watching the water and air bubbles move through the glass tube.I haven’t burnt the coffee as I’m careful with the temperature. My first few tries were with Maxwell House as I didn’t want to spend too much money on a practice run. The only good thing I could say was I had a major caffeine buzz that lasted all day.Im usually a dark roast Moka pot guy but this morning I tried with medium roast beans as I heard medium roast is better for percolators. The coffee was watery and underwhelming, but I think could be because I need to grind the beans a bit finer (I used 30 on the Baratza Encore). I don’t think I needed to use more coffee, I used 35 g to 600 ml (4 cups) water.Despite percolators getting very little love here, just wondering if anyone has any tweeks for percolating. There is something I love about the method and despite the naysayers, determined to make a great cup. Submitted April 09, 2023 at 08:06AM by Chuclo https://ift.tt/ZrxQ0GV via /r/Coffee

[stmulnts-a]

               ⋯⋯⋯     “Jesus, I'm gonna need a coffee after this damn shift.”

[juli-sama]

hii!! could you do a sp character x fem!reader playing video game really late?? sorry if its confusing! first time askin haha <3

Hey guys, this on landed on my like "private"?? (no idea what to call this blog) blog because the ask got send here.

You dont need to follow this one, dont worry XD

Anyway, I hope you enjoy what I wrote, even if I feel like I didnt do so well. ಥ_ಥ

_____________________________

the boys x fem!Reader - Video game weekends!

Cartman:

Cartman is the type of person that stays awake the whole weekend to play. Only if it’s a good game of course.

So, staying up with you is really no problem.

Between you too, you’d probably fall asleep first since he is so used to staying up.

He will still be surprised about the whole thing. A girl. Staying up late. To play videogames?

He sure learned something new that time.

Cartman is one of the best people to lean on to sleep, since he is pretty cuddly.

Stan:

This boy will bath in energy drinks.

He needs them to stay awake, or he will just fall sleep eventually with a controller in his hand.

The idea of staying up late and play video games? He loves it to pieces.

He’s down to play whatever.

Just dance on the Wii? Yes.

Smash Bros on the Switch? Yes.

Story driven game on the console, where you change who plays after a chapter? Hell yes.

He’s also a snack master. He will get everything for a perfect gaming night.

Kyle:

Kyles’s mum will 100% make every snack possible when she hears you come over to play video games.

Kyle will be embarrassed when she comes in to give you more food, but calm down, once you tell him you like that she does that.

He doesn’t really care what you guys play, as long as its not super boring or not his interest.

He is willing tp try anything but will honestly tell you if he hates what you picked.

You two would eventually fall asleep, leaning on each other, controllers still in hand.

Sheila would secretly take a photo of it.

Kenny:

If you hang out at his place, Karen will be with you until she falls asleep, and Kenny has to carefully carry her to her room.

Kenny is a master at staying up.

After such a weekend you wonder if Kenny ever really sleeps.

You don’t see him sleep; he’s just always awake.

He is still awake when you slowly drift to sleep, and he is already up and making breakfast the next morning before you even get the chance to roll out of bed.

Kenny can’t offer to bring any games or even provide a console, so it’s a standard that you either stay at your place or you bring your stuff to his.

He’s super thankful for that, won’t complain about whatever game you want to play and takes care of snacks in return.

You just don’t know where he gets those from.

Butters:

Butters has an Xbox but he barley plays on it.

He prefers his Switch (special Animal Crossing edition) much more and so you guys manly play on the old Wii he has or the multiplayer switch games.

Be careful though, as Butters will probably beat you in Mario Party or Mario kart every time.

He knows all the minigames by heart and is an absolute God in Mario kart.

But he’s a really enjoyable companion anyway.

You can try to persuade him to play other games with you.

Butters will eventually around two in the morning tell you its late and then you guys will stop playing to sleep.

Clyde:

He will bring sweets and get high on sugar.

Clyde stays awake because of all the sugar intake, be it gummi bears that he stuffs inside his mouth (he will do a fist full and show you how many he can fit inside his mouth) or the liters of cola he downs all night.

Around five in the morning he will have a tummy ache and fall asleep while crying about how much it hurts.

Clyde is one of the few people who take just dance super serious and he’s a master. Good luck beating him.

Clyde is open to any kinds of games, but prefers fun multiplayer games like Mario party or Smash Bros.

Falling asleep eventually with him means that you two will be all sprawled out on the floor, the game you played still running.

Token:

Token isn’t that used to staying up late.

He sure can stay up late sometimes, but almost every weekend, like some people he knows? Nope.

Anything you need for a perfect gaming night he will get.

New game? He has it. A Snack you like? Already there in neat bowls. Some drink you fancy? Prepared before you arrived.

He always wants you to choose the game and makes sure you are 100% comfortable and happy.

Token will always have a pair of sweatpants at his place that he gives you, so you can be comfortable. If you ask nicely, he might even give you (happily) a sweatshirt.

At 3 in the morning, he would maybe ask if you’re tired. If you are, great, he will suggest sleeping. If not, he will down an energy drink and stay awake with you.

Craig:

Craig is a big stargazing fan, so its normal for him to be awake when no one else is.

So when you asked if you guys can do all-nighter videogame marathon, he was on board.

If you do it at his place, you will have Stripe in your lap at some point.

Don’t come at Craig with Mario party or something… He is more of a horror game fan. Resident Evil Village, Outlast, The Evil Within.

He will at some point give in and let you choose something.

Around one in the morning he will ask you if you want to go and stargaze.

If you agree, he will make sure to show you everything that there is to see.

Should you get sleepy, Craig will gladly offer himself up as a pillow to sleep on.

If Craig gets sleepy, he will just chill on the bed, and slowly drift to sleep, smiling while he is thinking about you.

Tweek:

Tweek runs on caffein and like Cartman, he has absolutely no trouble staying awake for long periods of time.

Don’t worry, you will be able to match him if you stay over, since his parents will make sure that you also get enough of their homemade coffee™.

He’s open to play whatever and to your surprise he has some hidden gems on his PlayStation that are super fun with him.

He will 100% bake for you guys whenever you make gaming nights and make them fit what you play.

You agreed to play a horror game together?

Get ready for horror themed cupcakes!

If you fall asleep somewhere late in the night, he will probably stay up and just chill next to you.

Jimmy:

Mario party? Mario party.

Jimmy and you will know every minigame by heart once you’re done.

You don’t know how, but no matter how much you play, it just doesn’t get boring with him.

If you do get sick of playing with Mario and his friends, Jimmy will show you his collection of interactive story games. Detroit become Human, Telltale games, Life is Strange, Until Dawn and the likes.

Debating with him what’s the best path or choosing the obvious bad or awkward choices are fun.

Misses Valmer will gladly bring you some chips or bring you something to drink ever so often.

Sleep? For the weak.

When you’re with Jimmy, he is pure entertainment, and you just can’t get tired.

Jimmy himself is just super eager to do all kinds of stuff with you, so that keeps him awake.

[stmulnts-a]

               ⋯⋯⋯     “Eating one meal a day isn't taking care of yourself, y'know.” He leans a bit closer, holding up a hand so wandering customers have a lower chance of hearing. “The amount of parents trying so hard to get their kids to pick a July Fourth bear, is too many.”

❛ ━━ I've already eaten today tweek, but thanks... people really will buy anything on the fourth, huh? ❜

[edgyandoverzealous]

Okay so headcannons or ig cannons cause it's my au about my SP Creek road trip au.

- Craig and Tweek stopped for gas and while Craig refueled the car Tweek went inside to get fuel for their bodies, as they discussed. Craig got in the car and drove for three minutes before he realized his boyfriend was no longer asleep in the passenger seat and in fact not in the car at all. Horrified he turned around and sped back. Luckily Tweek was still shopping and was none the wiser. This didn't stop Craig from practically clinging to Tweek whenever they left the car afterwards though. When questioned the response was a monotoned "never again" and a look of someone who's been through the horrors.

- The first couple of weeks all they bnb's and hotels had two rooms/beds. But Tweek has nightmares and sleeping with Craig seemed to help. Needless to say they stopped getting two beds.

- Craig is an active sleeper and Tweek is a light sleeper. Therefore one night while the couple was sleeping Craig turned and nuzzled into Tweek, which Tweek found cute. Then Craig promptly wapped him in the face and turned around. Tweek got a bloody nose because it was dry as hell and his allergies were already acting up. He then tried to be quiet as he made it stop but Craig woke up to the yellow lights and a sink full of blood. Craig felt horrible. He propped Tweek up on the counter and fixed him up with a soft "oh honey" and then spent the rest of the night with his chin on the top of Tweeks head singing lullabies until his insomniac boyfriend fell asleep. Only then did he let himself drift off.

- Craig's favorite road trip snacks are savory while Tweeks are sweet. They share quite often. Craig also, much to Tweek's disapproval, refuses to drink as much water as he probably needs. He hydrates purely through Powerade, Gatorade, and the very few bottles of water he drinks when Tweek Pouts too much. They find a sugar free flavoring that Craig likes and store it like madmen to convince him to drink his water.

- The road trip playlist consists of cheesy old love songs, the crane wives, classical classics, perfect circle, Chevelle, Lovejoy, Conan Gray, dead man's poison, the oh hellos, mother mother, and Mitski. It's funky but they like it. (May or May not be making said playlist rn)

- while saving up for the road trip the couple didn't have a lot of days off that correlated for dates. Therefore they would show up to each other's place of occupation to flirt and eventually both started working for Tweek's family coffeehouse. They were scheduled together frequently because Craig's presence had a higher chance of soothing Tweek's nerves than it did of worsening them.

- they kept the savings in jars underneath their beds. So many jars filled with cash and coins. So many.

- they took stripes with them. One night they let him out of their cage in a field of wildflowers. They thought he ran away only to spend an hour running around the field for nothing when he was fast asleep in Craig's hat. They then placed stripes back in his habitat and danced with the fireflies in the field.

- Tweek is spoiled when it comes to coffee and therefore cannot drink gas station or fast food chain coffee. He drinks from canned coffee, coffee shops, or not at all. But the not at all didn't last long because Tweek had withdrawals, massive headaches, grouchiness, the works.

- Craig prefers to get his caffeine through energy drinks, most recently monsters. He likes the OG but his favorite was the Ultra Paradise monster.

- Tweek's favorite Monster is the Mocha loca coffee. he accidentally created Craig's Monster habits by choosing Monster triple shot canned coffee which he got banned from after he drank two and konked out for a day and a half only waking up to take Advil.

- Craig is always cold and Tweek is a human heater. This makes for hella good cuddles.

- Craig has a hard time finding beds that suit his height properly and the couples nightly routine consists of shifting until they both fit comfortably.

- It takes Tweek a few nights to get used to falling asleep with someone else so he stays up on his phone until Craig falls asleep during the early nights. Craig getting fed up with the Lack of Sleep Tweek is receiving once flopped his entire weight onto Tweek and tossed Tweek's phone into a drawer. Tweek found the weight weirdly comforting and had the best night sleep he's had in ages.

- The couple makes an effort to see the best of what each state has to offer. So they end up at a lot of nature events and festivals. One time they went on a ferris wheel in LA and the ride got stuck at the top. While Tweek panicked for awhile after he calmed down Craig realized he didn't hate the city and all its polluting lights when they illuminated his lover's face. Because he just looked so pretty as he looked on in awe.

- Sometimes Craig will shake his head and his hat will swing with it against his face. It is the cutest thing Tweek has ever seen and he even said 'i love you' but when he was asked why he just responded with some kind of form of 'i just think you're neat.'

- Car rides have always been soothing to Tweek. The soft hum and bumps, paired with the ever passing scenery, lulled him to sleep. Craig appreciates this the most during golden hour when Tweek's eyes flutter open as he realizes he woke up in time for his favorite time of day, sunset. The sky lit up in oranges pinks and purples.

[all-my-friends-were-glorious]

TWEEK TREVOR TWEAK

The Man On The Edge

“Memory creates a hallucination of the past, desire creates a hallucination of the future." - Jaggi Vasudev

GENERAL INFORMATION

Name: Tweek Trevor Tweek

Nicknames: None

Faceclaim: Nariman Malanov

Age: 23

Gender: Cis Male

Sexuality: Homosexual Homoromantic Monogamous

Height: 6′6″

Weight: 114lbs

Birthday: April 17th

Sign: Aries

Occupation: Owner of Tweak Bros. Coffee, Drug Kingpin/User

Personality:

+ Courageous, Determined, Confident, Enthusiastic, Honest, Passionate, Active, Challenging, Athletic, Clean, Compassionate, Dramatic, Dynamic, Efficient, Eloquent, Energetic, Faithful, Generous, Hardworking, Helpful, Imaginative, Individualistic, Insightful, Intelligent, Meticulous, Neat, Open, Painstaking, Perfectionist, Planful, Resourceful, Romantic, Sentimental, Shrewd, Thorough, Tidy, Vivacious, Witty

/ Absentminded, Aggressive, Artful, Business-Like, Competitive, Contradictory, Dominating, Emotional, High-Spirited, Hurried, Idiosyncratic, Impressionable, Intense, Irreligious, Irreverent, Outspoken, Physical, Skeptical, Solitary, Stubborn, Subjective, Tough, Unchanging, Unfathomable, Unpredictable

- Impatient, Moody, Short-Tempered, Impulsive, Abrasive, Abrupt, Angry, Anxious, Argumentative, Barbaric, Blunt, Boisterous, Brittle, Brutal, Cantankerous, Cautious, Clumsy, Coarse, Complaintive, Compulsive, Confused, Crazy, Crude, Delicate, Dependent, Devious, Dirty, Discourteous, Disobedient, Disputatious, Envious, Extreme, Fanatical, Fatalistic, Fearful, Fickle, Flamboyant, Graceless, Grim, Hedonistic, Hostile, Insensitive, Irrational, Mannerless, Melancholic, Money-Minded, Negativistic, Opinionated, Outrageous, Over imaginative, Paranoid, Pedantic, Possessive, Prejudiced, Quirky, Regimental, Repentant, Resentful, Self-Indulgent, Silly, Sordid, Strong-Willed, Superstitious, Suspicious, Tactless, Thoughtless, Troublesome, Unpolished, Unrealistic, Vindictive

VICES

Craig - Tweek simultaneously loves and hates Craig, but his loyalty to him runs very deep. Craig is the only person who understands him, who helps him and keeps him under control. He trusts him implicitly and always, even if his delusions tell him otherwise. If Craig says it, it must be true, even if Tweek argues about it at first.

Drug Use - Addicted to cocaine and caffeine from a young age, Tweek cannot and will not stop his drug use. He has expanded to other things, of course, and takes a wide variety of medications and street drugs that he has a tendency to make it himself, or buy it from a strictly small amount of sources. He does still buy from the McCormicks on occasion.

Bipolar Disorder With Psychotic Features - Tweek has been diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder with Psychotic Features. He has hallucinations that his therapist doesn’t associate strictly with the drugs. However, he doesn’t take his meds like he’s supposed to, which doesn’t really help his situation. He does take them to sleep, however, because of their heavy sedative properties.

Birds - Tweek has an intense love of birds and will do whatever he can to help them if he can.

BIOGRAPHY

Tweek's life, and he recollection of it, is erratic and disjointed at best. He knows that he was raised by his parents, but he can't recall much about them. His father is a metaphor, and something he never got along with. His mother is a shadow that he vaguely recalls as having lived in the house and made rules. 

Craig is the one thing that he can remember that sticks out in detail. He carved out parts of Tweek from their instigated fight, to Tweek being accepted into his friend group. When they started to date, things felt right.

But Tweek was never good at keeping things that felt good. They are on and off often, and most times Tweek ends up being the one breaking them up. Paranoia and anxiety are heavy in his life.

When he was 16, a bad drug deal killed his father, and by the time he was 18, he owned his own house and the coffee shop. His mother left South Park and never looked back. Tweek continued to run the coffee shop, but he did change things. Better coffee, and better cocaine in the coffee, were his first step. He expanded the menu, adding different drugs to different things, not because he wanted to addict people, but because that was how he liked it himself. 

Tweek has become something of a drug kingpin in the town, taking over for a majority of the McCormicks by making his own product when he doesn't have it brought in from elsewhere. Between testing his own products, working on new recipes and making syrups for his own shop, and everything else in his life, he barely sleeps. He has to drug himself and sleeps best if he's in Craig's bed/arms. 

RUDE-A-BEGA “RUDY”

Rudy was Tweek’s second bird after some problems with his father and the parrot he’d had growing up ended with the bird’s rehoming. A rescue bird, Rudy has a small molting problem and tends to divebomb people he likes for attention. Tweek loves him very much, and babies him often. Rudy likes to cuddle, and will bridge the gap if Tweek and Craig cuddle around him.

MATCHA

Matcha actually came to live with Tweek due to a joke made by one of the Vampire Society. Allison told him she wanted tea with ‘echidna’ in it, and he panicked that people were hunting the monotremes for tea. Finding one on the black market, he purchased it immediately. Though he didn’t know much about echidnas, he learned quickly. Originally, Matcha was one of six that he purchased, but he ended up rehoming the rest with the zoo in Denver. Matcha does, however, have a little top hat and monocle, because Tweek maintains that he is a little gentleman.

CHARON

A rescued turkey vulture that Tweek found, captured, and brought home. He ended up bonding with Tweek as his face and injured wing were healing, and when it came time to release him, he refused to leave. Now, he and Tweek work together to send messages, and he often sends them to Craig.

QUICK FACTS

Tweek has a conceal carry lisence, eight guns, and wonders why people think he’s dangerous. 

Tweek has an ‘instant coffee’ container that he tries to pass off as not being a dark glass jar filled with cocaine. He dips into it when he’s busy.

He got through school by doing other people’s papers and homework for them in the back of the coffee shop.

When he was sixteen, his father was shot in a bad drug deal. His mother eventually relocated after leaving the family business to her son. Tweek takes pride in it, and keeps it clean and working fairly well.

Birds are a passion of his and he tries to rehabilitate injured birds he finds around town. He is unaware that Firkle is a big proponent in the birds he finds.

Charon stayed with him and he now partakes in falconry with him.

Rudy is Tweek’s baby bird, and he dotes on him often. 

Tweek loves Craig to the moon and back, but he also is the one that mostly causes their many erratic break-ups. He also tends to ask to get back together.

Addicted to cocaine, he also has a rather influential drug business that he runs alongside the coffee shop. He has black market contacts and can get his hands on just about anything he could want. This is how he got Matcha.

Headcanon Masterlist

TAGS LIST

La Bokka De Lä Cokka  (Tweek Tweak)

Nihilists With Good Imaginations (Tweek Musings)

I Am Satisfied Hiding In Our Friend’s Apartment  (Tweek Aesthetic)

For The Last Twelve Years All My Shit Has Been In Boxes (Tweek Closet)

The Future Freaks Me Out (Tweek Headcanons)

Oh Please Tell Me That You’re Alright (Tweek Journal Entries)

You Sir Are A Rude-Abega (Rudy)

He Has A Little Monocle What A Little Gentleman! (Matcha)

Under The Cloak Of Darkness (Charon)

VERSES

TBD

MAINS AND SHIPS

MAINS

@nxwkid​ - Douchebag/New Kid/Alex - You Don’t Know What You’re Getting Yourself Into (Tweek and Alex - Nxwkid)

@southxparkxafterxdark​ - Michael -  Lights Are Flashing Cars Are Crashing Getting Frequent Now (Tweek and Michael - SouthxParkxAfterxDark)

@southxparkxafterxdark​ - Mike - Oh I’ll Take No Pity From Your Friends  (Tweek and Mike - SouthxParkxAfterxDark)

@southxparkxafterxdark​ - Henrietta - Something Akin To A Breakdown (Tweek and Henrietta - SouthxParkxAfterxDark)

@southxparkxafterxdark​ - Mia - They’re Coming Back For All The Children (Tweek and Mia - SouthxParkxAfterxDark)

@southxparkxafterxdark​ - Vic - Lie To Me Tonight (Tweek and Vic - SouthxParkxAfterxDark)

@throughxthexmist​ - Stan - I’m Only Human And I Bleed When I Fall Down (Tweek and Stan - ThroughxThexMis)

@throughxthexmist​ - Craig - I Can Dance And Play The Part If That’s What You Ask (Tweek and Craig - ThroughxThexMist)

@throughxthexmist​ - Kenny - Fall Beside An Early Grave (Tweek and Kenny - ThroughxThexMist)

SHIPS

Before I Lose Control There's Just One Thing You Should Know (Craig x Tweek - ThroughxThexMist)

[zeightz]

Snow White AU continues 🍎

Tweek's father constantly gives Tweek coffee to calm him down, not realizing that it, on the contrary, aggravates his condition. Therefore, Richard is a king by analogy with the queen who poisoned Snow White and coffee is a poisoned apple

AU's story begins with Tweek developing paranoia and hallucinations (one of the possible consequences of excessive caffeine consumption), due to which he began to think that his father wants to kill him, so he decides to run away and stumbles upon a dwarf house in which remains. There was no coffee in the gnome house and Tweek, already heavily addicted to caffeine, would have started something like a caffeine withdrawal. The father is looking for him, and when he finds he tries to calm him down in the usual way - coffee.

[caffeinatedaddict]

- Evening Walk -

(06/27/2020)

Woo, my header image for the time being. This one was both fun and a pain in the ass to make. First it was the body proportions, I wanted to shorten Tweek's height to play on the myth that caffeine stunts your growth. After I figured out the designs, heights, and proportions I wanted to mess around with, I moved on to the pose. Oh god this was difficult to get right, the finished pose looks better than the original traditional sketch. But my god, it took a lot of messing around with angles and rotations.. I'll just stop here with my bitching.

But I do like how the background(and some of the foreground) look. Bit of a painted feel..and I'm pretty proud that I did this on my phone of all things. I do need to get my computer back up and running....or more like find my god damn tablet pen stylus because I lost for a fucking month now and I can't-

I need to find it, but until then I'm fine with using my phone for this.

[themangledsans0508]

Big Gnome

Craig Tucker was in no way oblivious, he could tell when his stuff was going missing. In particular, his sweatshirts he was so fond of. Yes, he did indeed have multiple of the same sweatshirt, his mother insistent on making sure he had extras in the case he lost one, or it tore, or perhaps it was stolen. 

Yes, he was aware that someone was stealing his sweatshirts, in particular, a younger shakey blonde. He gave him one to borrow, and it was returned, and then it disappeared, along with Craig’s spare. 

Tweek basically lived at Craig’s house, spending a lot of his free time there and spent the night most days. Yeah, they did spend quite a lot of time together, but they still hung out with their own friends. Craig would hang out with Clyde, Token, and Jimmy and play some video games or just chill out. Tweek would meet up with Scott or Butters and they would do stuff on their own, whether it be board games or just talking about what was going on.

There was no jealousy, and they trusted each other. Being in a relationship for six years helped too, as everyone knew they were exclusive. 

That being so, Craig was rather convinced that his sweatshirt disappearing was Tweek’s doing. 

He didn’t just forget things, he’d remember if he set his sweatshirt down. He doubted anyone would steal it either, it was just a plain blue sweatshirt.

Unless, of course, they wanted to send a message.

Not to him, but to everyone else. A message that said; “Back off, he’s mine.”

Tweek didn’t need to, he had no competition. To Craig, that twitchy blonde was the universe, someone he was committed to. Tweek could be a murderer, and Craig would still be head over heels for him.

The only problem was, he had no proof it was actually Tweek. 

Craig may have been (and occasionally, still was) a level fourteen thief, but when it came to Tweek, he outranked him. The only man who could steal from Craig Tucker and not get caught was Tweek Tweak. Even the level fifteen thief, Douchebag, had gotten caught trying to sneak past him. Tweek however, could rob Craig blind right in front of him and he wouldn’t notice. Not because Tweek was stealthy, but because he would be distracted by the beautiful man in front of him.

He decided he wanted to find out if his lovely boyfriend was in fact the reason his sweatshirts kept disappearing, and to do that he decided that instead of spending the night at his house, they would be spending it at Tweek’s instead.

 So that being said, he sent a text to tell Tweek he would be spending the night at his house with him. The only reason Tweek was home was because his father wanted him to spend some time at least in the house for “the family aspect of the business.”   

Craig hated Richard for a few reasons. The main one being that he didn’t truly care for Tweek and only used him for his own gain. He once thanked him for dating his son, like he was doing it for Richard or like it was a burden he had to carry.

Thinking about it made his blood boil. He didn’t understand how someone could not care about their kids. He knew it happened, he just didn’t understand why it happened.

Yes, Craig was typically cold to most. Yes, he had been a bully. He was different now though. Maybe not to the outside eye, but to those close to him it was obvious. He was less irritable and cruel, and more patient. It would be difficult to connect these changes to anyone but Tweek. He could, in theory, be maturing. In reality, however, Tweek taught him a lot.

Of all the couples in South Park, they were the pair seemingly guaranteed to last. Soulmates, dare he think. 

He would make it last. He was sixteen, young enough to be told he wasn’t old enough to know what he was feeling, but in his opinion, he was old enough to know what he was feeling.

What he was feeling was love, he decided when he was thirteen. Three years later, the feelings had only intensified, confirming his suspicions. They were like two puzzle pieces; they fit perfectly together. Their bodies, their personalities, just like pencil and paper or the moon and the stars.

What didn’t fit together was his sweatshirts and disappearing.

Which is exactly why he was walking down the street as the sun set, daydreaming away. He arrived on the Tweak’s doorstep and noticed the lights on in the living room. He sighed in annoyance. Richard was probably sitting on the couch, watching the news to see what trends he could hop on board of. He knocked to be polite despite the fact it was no longer necessary, and to his dismay, saw Richard stand from his seat.

“Hello Craig,” Richard said with a smile, “Are you spending the night on this fine evening. Fine, like the freshly ground coffee-”

“Yes I am,” Craig interrupted quickly. He didn’t need to hear him go off about coffee, no matter how many years passed or how many times he said it, his coffee still tasted like shit.

“Alright son, Tweek is upstairs.” He patted him and returned to the couch, watching intently for anything teenagers may be attracted to.

 Craig moved swiftly up the stairs, eager as always to see his boyfriend. He didn’t think he’d ever not be eager to see his boyfriend, not after ten years, not after a thousand years, not after a million. 

He opened the door slowly as to not startle Tweek and saw the blonde sitting at his table and working on a lego set. He was focused, his head snapping from his book to the blocks in his hands. Craig wasn’t sure that he had even heard the door open. He took a few steps towards the blonde and tapped his foot a few times to mimic knocking.

“Hey babe,” Craig said. Tweek carefully placed the lego structure on the table and hurried towards Craig, wrapping his arms around him. 

“My God, man! I thought you were joking when you said you were coming over tonight!”

“Why would I be joking?”

“I don’t know, I just thought you weren’t actually coming!”

“Don’t want me here?” Craig smirked.

“No, no, no! Opposite of that, dick.” Tweek stuck his tongue out playfully. “Whenever I’m here, my parents drive me crazy!”

“I know, honey, I know.” Craig squeezed him and then released his grip. “One day we’ll be out of here, Tweek,” he murmured, running his hand down Tweek’s cheek.

“Someday soon, I hope,” Tweek muttered. Craig kissed Tweek’s forehead and rested his chin atop his head.

“After we graduate, we’ll get a place of our own, baby. I promise.” Tweek placed a kiss on his chin and smiled.

“Did you eat already, Craig? Because I can go grab you something if you want.”

“Yes, Tweek, I already ate. It’s like eight at night now,” he chuckled. “What about you, Tweekers? Did you eat?” Tweek nodded.

“Yeah, I was just gonna finish this set and then go to bed.” Tweek pulled away and sat in front of the unfinished building. Craig followed swiftly and picked him up, seating himself in the chair and placing Tweek on his lap.

“I’ll keep you company,” Craig breathed into his neck. Tweek shuddered but continued his work. 

It took around three hours for Tweek to finally finish his project, no thanks at all to Craig who kept running his hands up and down his body, planting random kisses on him, and squeezing rather vulnerable spots.

Craig completely forgot about why he had even come over to spend the night in the first place. That is, until Tweek asked to be released so he could brush his teeth and shower.

“It’s eleven at night, and you want to take a shower?” Craig asked, “Why not just forget it and go to bed?”

“Because I didn’t take one this morning. I like being clean. It won’t take long dude. You can do what you need to in there first so you don’t have to wait for me.” 

“Yeah, I’ll go first. But I’m still going to wait for you.” Craig took his hand and kissed it before removing his grasp to allow Tweek to get up. 

Craig went to the bathroom, feeling suspense now that it was almost time for his plan to come to full fruition. He gave Tweek a kiss as they passed in the hallway and returned to the bedroom.

He took a moment to really look at the lego creation. It was a city block, with a pet shop, cafe, and living space. Three of Tweek’s favourite things in one creation. He shook his head, he was getting distracted.

Focused on his mission, he opened the closet door and looked inside the small space.

He was surprised, not at the fact that indeed, both of his sweatshirts were in there, but at how many other articles of his clothing were there as well. Shirts in particular, but there were a few pairs of pants hidden around too, most likely however from Craig himself throwing them in a random place. He suspected there was more too, just not as organised as the ones he found. He smiled a little thinking about why Tweek had stolen the clothes in the first place.

Craig moved to the bed, taking his shirt off and tossing it off somewhere off to the side and laid himself on his side of the bed. He listened to the running water in the other room, the soft humming coming for a beautiful angel, and the wind gently blowing against the windows. If he hadn’t been at the end of a mystery he may have fallen asleep.

Tweek kept to his word, soon coming into the bedroom wearing a shirt that hung loosely off his body (perhaps because it belonged to Craig). His hair was drooping downwards and sticking to his face due to the water. Craig reconsidered his opinion that Tweek was an angel. He thought he was a god in disguise now.

“Craig, I thought you would have fallen asleep,” Tweek yawned. He wouldn’t normally be tired, thanks to all the caffeine in his system. With Craig, however, he didn’t feel as stressed or the urge to drink (as much) coffee. His addiction to caffeine was wearing off but in turn, he was picking up a new one.

At least the new one didn’t cost anything and was much more pleasing in his opinion.

“Nah, I told you I would wait for you.” Tweek chuckled quietly.

“You can’t control sleep, dear,” he smiled. Craig smiled back and pushed himself off the bed.

“I can try. Also, that shirt looks familiar for some reason.” Tweek looked down at the white shirt that was now slightly sliding off his shoulder and back to Craig.

“Yeah, I found it on the floor over there. I think someone lost it in here somehow,” Tweek teased. Craig couldn’t keep his smile from growing but shook his head gently. He moved past Tweek and opened the closet. He gestured slightly to the stash of his clothing and crossed his arms.

“You know, I’ve been looking for these,” Craig pointed at his sweatshirts dangling from hangers. “I need at least one of them.”

“Well, I need one too for when I’m trapped in this hell hole,” Tweek huffed, crossing his arms. 

“I need one too so I don’t fucking freeze to death Tweek.” Tweek made a few small sounds and one of his hands moved to pull at his hair. Craig took a few quick steps forward and took his hands to keep them from doing any damage to those golden locks.

“You can’t freeze to death, what would I do?” Tweek twitched slightly and Craig sighed.

“I meant it as an expression, babe. I would never leave you,” Craig said softly.

“You better not, asshole.” Craig laughed.

“Nice to know you love me. Now can I please have one of my sweatshirts? I don’t care about the rest of the stuff you stole.”

“No, you can take it tomorrow when we go to school. It’s time to sleep for fuck’s sake.” Tweek wriggled out of Craig’s grip and went to the bed, laying with his back against the wall. “Well? Are you coming?”

“Of course,” Craig snorted. He slid into the bed across from Tweek so their faces were only inches apart. He looked into those blue eyes that he so often found himself getting lost in and found himself absentmindedly wrapping his arms around Tweek and pulling him closer, earning a squeak from the boy.

Tweek flipped himself so instead of facing the room, he was now facing the wall. He pushed himself so he was flush against Craig and sighed in content. God, he loved cuddling.

There was nothing sexual in their closeness, instead it being love and trust. Tweek would never have his back to someone if they were alone in a room unless it was his partner, and even then they had to have a strong trust. Craig, in turn, would never allow himself to appear soft or even caring for that matter. Simply cold and distant. 

They had something special that almost no other couple in South Park had.

Hey! I already uploaded this onto Wattpad! My username is TheMangledSans0508! Check me out!

[stmulnts-a]

               ⋯⋯⋯     He, at first, paid little attention to the ding of his phone. Alternating between Twitter and Sims 4 had taken up a majority of his morning, and having been in the middle of creating some off - the - wall chain of reactions to lead to the demise of a particularly fat, red - jacketed sim, Tweek decided to check after he was sure it'd work.

He had to force his eyes from his computer screen so he could read the message.

Bebe's text sat idle on his phone until it darkened twice, his thumbs hovering over the keyboard as he mentally debated on whether or not he wanted to leave. On one hand, there was a chance he'd have to run into people he just didn't wanna put up with. But on the other hand...

[ ➥ Bebe💅 ] yaeh ok i'll be there, i jsut need to find a ride 😁 [ ➥ Bebe💅 ] i dont ahve alcohol tho will brigning some cookies work?

The blonde couldn't help but sigh contently as she lounged by the pool, blunt in hand and listening to her favorite Snail Mail album. It was nice, but a little lonely at the same time. She took another puff of her blunt, holding it between her lips as she pulled out her phone. 

[MASS TEXT] Pool day at my place! Bring drinks, suits, and towels! Don't forget the sunscreen.☀️😎

She selected all the contacts in her phone but her finger lingered over the send button for a moment. Did she really want just anyone showing up? She quickly unselected Cartman and a few people from out of town before sending the mass text. She smiled, leaning back in the chair once more to enjoy the sun.