#“should I tell her it was a suicide? Nah”

[mothshrub]

If I was Emily I would've been crapping myself, ngl.

[liberty-spiked]

my teacher told us her worst experience as a teacher - she had a young man kill himself for being gay. a classmate decided its the perfect time to make fun of homosexuals and suicidal people. i yelled at that little brat :)

[martinluvrr]

CRUSH CRAZY | PAIGE BUECKERS

⋅˚₊‧ paige x fem!physio

⋅˚₊‧ summary: the new physio of the Uconn Wbb has caught the eye of their golden player, but it seems Paige has become a little... crush crazy.

⋅˚₊‧ warnings: hoping none

⋅˚₊‧ duayaps: i hateee thisss but its been sitting in my drafts so i finally finished it 😭

⋅˚₊‧ nav ||

"AND BEFORE YOU TAKE THE PILLS MAKE SURE YOU ATE SOME FOOD" I said to Azzi. It's been about 2 weeks since I started working with her, the Uconn medical staff have been nothing but welcoming.

At first, I didn't know what I was getting myself into, where I come from basketball isn't a big enough thing the way football is ( soccer ). I also didn't spend that much tie on social media, but as soon as I opened tiktok, tons of edits filled my page, most about Uconn and other teams. There were especially edits of Uconn's number five.

Paige Bueckers.

The girl was attractive. And she had the confidence to prove it. Me and Paige had very little contact together , but even if it was for a second, for some odd reason, my stomach was filled with butterflies.

"Thank you again" Azzi's sweet voice said. I turned around to look at the girl, after she underwent surgery for tearing her ACL during practice last November, there was still a little pain in the leg, but nothing that should stop her from rejoining the team in January. Of course, left out from not being in the action.

"No problem and please be careful ,i dont wanna se you anymore, you're boring' I jokingly said to her, she let out a laugh. I heard a chuckle behind me, when I turned, there in all her glory, number five.

"Hi Paige" I muttered, suddenly becoming shy.

"Hey" She said grinning. "Soooooo..."

"Paige" I said sternly, hiding my smile. "What are you doing here?"

"I-I was just checking up on Azzi" She told me, cracking a small smile at Azzi. I hoped the disappointed wasn't showing in my face, the delusional part in me was hoping she just came to see me.

"Well she's all yours"

✰

"Coach" Nika yelled, suddenly at Geno. "I don't feel so good"

"What happened?" Geno questioned her, making her sit down. She was fine 10 minutes ago.

"I feel like I'm gonna throw up" She said, staring at the ground. Coach felt Paige come beside him. "You okay?" Paige asked, Nika shook her head.

"Maybe we should call Y/N" Paige said, Nika nodded. Geno looked at the both of them, did they hit their head?

"Y/N's a physio, she doesn't deal with stomach problems" He explained, then he heard a cackle come from behind them. KK.

Now he got it, just before Nika came up to him, she was talking with Paige and KK, the three of them whispering amongst one another. Knowing Paige and her little crush, he could figure out that she put Nika up to this.

"Try telling me that again after suicides, maybe i'll believe it then" He said,trying to hide his smile, both Nika and Paige groaned. KK struggled to hide her laugh, scratch that, she didn't even hide it.

"Girl Boo, maybe next time" She said to Paige, laughing.

✰

Practice was over, and everybody was tired. Most of them half a sleep, including Paige. While they were used to their morning practices, Paige had a late night.

"Nah I'm going pick up something from Y/N real quick" She hard Aubrey say. Hearing Y/N name, Paige was awake real quick.

" I'll come with you" She offered, the locker suddenly filled with laughs. Her teammate agreed but not before teasing her with the rest. After getting ready, both of the Uconn basketball players made their way to the medical wing, Paige was nervous, she was always nervous to see Y/N. Suddenly feeling insecure, Paige smelled herself, stressing because she's sweaty. She heard her teammate laugh. "Bro relax" Aubrey reassured her.

When they finally stood in front of Y/N's office door, when Aubrey saw that Paige was still in a bit of a daze, she took the honor of knocking on the office door. When they both heard a sweet voice yelling come in, they followed her orders.

"Oh Hi" I said surprised to see both of them here. Aubrey replied greeting me back, but Paige, just stood there staring at her, grinning like a maniac. "Hi P" I said to her.

"Hey" she replied. Before i could ask what she was doing here, Aubrey caught my attention, asking about her meds and if she could take lighter ones. I replied to all her questions, asking if she was feeling okay or if she needed a checkup. While i talked to Aubrey, i could feel Paige's eyes on me at the side of my head.

As Aubrey left, i expected for Paige to follow her, but the blonde didn't move. "P, do you need something?" i asked her.

"there's this party tonight , you should stop by"

Was Paige inviting you as a date? no.

"Okay, text me the details and i'll think about it" i kinda accepted her invite. Tonight i already made plans with my roommate, i don't think its a good idea to cancel those just because i want to see my crush. I also didn't want my hopes to be up.

While Y/N thought about that, Paige was beaming with excitement on the inside, if Y/N did show up tonight. this was going to be the night where she made her move.

✰

She didn't show, she. didn't. show.

In Y/N's head, she didn't think not being at that party was a big deal. she assumed Paige was just being nice inviting her and she definitely didn't know that P was disappointed.

Today they had normal hard practices, and today was actually the final time Paige tried to get Y/N's attention. no like actually the last time.

As she dribbled the ball, suddenly she dropped the ball, and dramatically fell to the ground. Ice let out a laugh, but while she knew what Paige's plan was, Geno and Y/N didn't.

I gasped, seeing Paige suddenly on the ground, she was fine literally 10seconds ago. Quickly running over, followed by the rest of the coaching staff.

“Can u get up by yourself?”

“I can try”

okay good sign, good sign. it’s not broken.

“To my office” I instructed both Nika and Paige. While holding on to Paige, giving her a bit of support.

When we arrived, I made Paige lay down. And started testing her knee. It seemed fine, actually perfect.

“Maybe we should get another opinion, I don’t think my brains working properly”

I can’t seem to find out whats wrong, she says her knee hurts, but the tests i did make her look perfect.

“Ummm Alright” i heard her hesitate. Her voice slightly nervous.

“Paige”

“Yeah”

“Are you… not injured?”

“Kinda” She answered.

I furrowed my eyebrows, making me think back. Maybe she didn’t want the pressure or she just wanted an excuse out of practice.

“Paige if you are using this to get out of practice well you’ve got another thing comi-”

“Im using this as an excuse to see you” She cut you off.

“What”

“I’ve literally been giving you hints all year and you’re telling me you didnt know i liked you?”

“Well no” I answered honestly. When i finally met her eyes, a small smile took over my face. Her sad face turned hopeful.

“I like you too P” i said “You couldve just asked me out and this wouldn’t have had to happen”

“Don’t even try to turn this on me ma” she started ranting, you just laughed and stood there watching. Okay so you weren’t delusional.

✰

[impishjesters]

Jax x Reader w/depression/suicidal tendencies

warning(s): mentions of depression/suicidal behavior/tendencies, nothing graphic though, mentions of morbid/dark humor note: it's only mentioned that he has feelings for you, whether romantic or platonic is left up to the reader. A/N: I think this is the fastest I've ever wanted to write for something utterly new to me, usually it takes a while of being into a series or liking a character to wanna write something. This was...less than twelve hours? This was probably the most self-indulgent thing I've written in a while.

Nobody was safe from Jax’s pranks, including you—regardless of how much he found himself gradually enjoying your company.

It’s actually a right of passage at this point that every new person (as rare as it is) who shows up is subjected to some awful prank to gauge just how much of an easy or difficult target they’ll be.

You handle the pranks with ease. Sure it can be annoying, but there’s little that can seemingly “kill” you here.

Which is a shame really—well, only slightly.

Your therapist would’ve probably found it a good thing, trying to off yourself in a digital world where sleeping and eating were no longer required likely meant the inability to die.

Not in a traditional sense anyway.

You’re the only one ballsy enough to prank Jax back, which isn’t easy but when a prank is successful? Oh, it’s worth it to see his reaction.

There’s an unspoken prank war back and forth, but typically the other’s are the subject of your guys’ pranks. Somehow it feels more rewarding with the joint effort.

It's not often, but sometimes Jax's pranks will go a step too far and trigger something unpleasant. He's not really sure why you just walk off like that, those pranks don't make him feel as satisfied for whatever reason.

Once a special type of friendship grows between the two of you, the pranks lessen—not entirely though—nah he loves the unsuspecting reactions of a prank you didn’t see coming.

The pranks become less hostile and more casual—he’s got a reputation to keep after all, regardless of how he feels about you.

The initial reaction to someone being told there was no way out was to panic, you however, didn’t..well not outright. Your initial reaction is dark humor—even with the whole censorship thing.

Ragatha is the only one initially disturbed/worried over your dark sense of humor, which should be expected from one of them since they’ve been there longer.

Jax is aware of your morbid sense of humor and often plays along with it, especially in the beginning—later in the friendship though? Yeah, there’s no noticeable physical change, but he’s only a tad worried.

When not tormenting the other’s Jax stuck with you, or vice versa.

After the attempted drowning and standing (willingly) in harm’s way of one (or three) of the rides, Jax keeps your bedroom key closer in hand than the others.

And honestly? Ragatha doesn’t even blame him. You aren’t distant from them, but you do tend to favour Jax’s company. Regardless of her feelings about him as a person, it becomes obvious that he feels something less hostile towards you compared to them.

It takes a while before you finally confess to Jax that prior to being trapped in this digital hell, you were medicated for depression/suicidal tendencies. And while the digital world took away things like needing sleep and food, it didn’t get rid of the thoughts or urges.

Now—had this been someone else telling him all this? He’d be very uncaring and probably make a nasty “joke”, but because it’s you? He’s treading into foreign territory here when it comes to emotions.

There’s not really anything he can say that would make you feel better, but he does show a more rare tender side, offering to be there whenever you need him. Just to backpedal like a tsundere and say that he won’t always be free ( a lie, the fuck else does he have to do?), but he’ll try and make time for you during those moments.

He doesn’t do some pinky promise bullshit, I mean he can and would, but he doesn’t expect his offer and attempts to do that much (words of promise aren’t on the same level as a prescription drug after all).

But if being around his rude ass self and doing the occasional nice *gag* gestures of like, hugging or whatever helps you, he’ll do it—just, not with others around obviously. Again, man has a reputation.

From then on Jax is more aware of where you are around him at all times, not in a suffocating way though. Well, not intentionally, he has his moments. But he’s trying, again this is new territory for him.

Jax makes it his unspoken, personal goal to make sure you don’t tread the line of becoming abstracted.

Bonus (fluff)

Jax will make an attempt not to immediately recoil from your touch when others are present.

I’m not talking “Whoops, sorry to bump into you”, I’m talking about grabbing onto his arm or being in his personal bubble because you need something grounding or whatever.

More often than none his immediate reaction is to just use you to lean on, elbow or arm resting on top of your head to give you some contact and pressure. (He does it out of habit even when you don't need it.)

Sure he probably looks like an ass to others, but after a while, they sort of just get used to it since you never bring up being offended by the act.

But in private? Yeah, sure shoot, just don’t expect him to put any effort into returning anything. Maybe the drape of an arm or his legs, but if it’s really bad? He’ll lay or sit there while you cling to him like a koala.

Jax actually finds it kinda funny how tightly you hold on whenever he gets up.

“Wow, you really holdin’ on there.”

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for ignoring my ex's threats of suicide?

this is a very old story, but it keeps eating at the back of my brain because i feel like the asshole in the situation, even though people close to me say im not.

i (19nb) broke up with my girlfriend (16f) and told her that we may get back together in the future. we broke up because she was incredibly emotionally draining, it was a long distance relationship, and also, i felt uncomfortable being nearly 20 dating someone in high school (i was also uncomfortable with our age difference for the year prior, but thats a whole other can of worms).

after breaking up, i stayed in contact, because she was my friend and i still liked her as a friend, just not a partner. she had some pretty severe home life issues, and had made extreme comments before ("nobody loves me, everyone hates me, no one would care if i disappeared" those sorts of things). now, i personally chalked it up to be a mix of teenage angst and homelife issues, but she had never made outright threats on her life before. it was always vague, or just an outright meltdown that i would care for her during.

i told her i was taking time for myself, and would probably not date anyone. a few months pass and i meet my then partner (now spouse). i know i fucked up in not telling her that i was seeing someone new, but i didnt really want the backlash of her screaming and yelling and crying over this, so i didnt tell her we were dating, just that i was spending a few months in his country (he had a place of his own, was older and more financially stable, it made sense at the time) and we had grown close.

it came out during a call, about 2 months into me dating and living with my partner, and probably about 5/6 months after i had broken up with them. she had asked if/when i was moving back home, and i told them i didnt know, because i was planning on living in his country. she asked if i was dating him, and i didnt want to lie, so i said we were. she got incredibly hostile, telling me that i shouldnt have lied to her and that i had said i wasnt going to date anyone. she completely melted down, getting incredibly angry to the point of tears, before telling me she was going to end it.

i panicked at that point and started trying to help her through tears, telling her i would do anything, before my partner took my phone from me and blocked her on that social media, calmly telling me to message her friends the situation, and that it wasnt my issue to deal with. i finished blocking her on our other socials (with her messaging me that she was so sorry), did what he said, and waited.

her friends confirmed she was okay later, but they were upset with me for not sticking around and helping her through her suicide attempt.

i still feel like an asshole, even though its been nearly 4 years since its happened. i feel like i should have done literally anything except what i did. ik my partner did the right thing, but also. i dunno. i feel bad i guess.

[frvnkcastles]

FILL THE VOID ➵ F. CASTLE

Summary: Struggling with BPD, you’re determined to not get attached to anyone again, but that quickly changes when you meet Frank.

Warnings: BPD, suicide ideation, language, hurt/comfort

Word count: 2.4k

Author’s note: Long time no see :) I’ve talked about this before but in addition to C-PTSD, I also struggle with borderline personality and I’ve started to talk about it with my therapist and it’s bringing up some feelings. Sooo I obviously had to write about it and insert Frank into the scenario to make myself feel better. I hope this resonates with someone else as well! <3

You had sworn to yourself you weren’t going to fall for anyone else ever again. You weren’t going to let anyone in, wouldn’t allow anyone to get close to you and unravel you and all your baggage. It was simply too much, bound to end in pain and abandonment and you couldn’t put yourself through that cycle for the millionth time.

Obviously, when you met Frank, he made that plan plenty hard to put into action. He was too charming for his own good, and he didn’t even know it. Really, he wasn’t looking for anything romantic and he certainly didn’t mean to sweep you off of your feet, yet he ended up doing exactly like that.

You were an idiot to think you wouldn’t get attached in one night. That was all it was supposed to be — just two strangers in your preferred albeit dingy bar, having a drink and chatting for the hell of it. You couldn’t deny that he was easy on the eyes, and little did you know, he thought about the same about you, but getting to know him more was what did the final nail in the coffin. You had your history of impulsive hook-ups, but you were really trying your best to ditch that unsafe habit. Somehow, connecting beyond the physical level was worse.

Your first mistake was asking his name. ”Frank”, he uttered out with that gravelly tone you were enjoying all too much, not bothering to do the whole handshake routine as he gulped down a swig of his beer and then looked over to you expectantly. You introduced yourself in return, but your mind was already wondering what Frank entailed, what kind of man you were on the cusp of learning about, and the curiosity was driving you crazy.

”So, who exactly is Frank Castle?” you queried, resting your jaw against your hand as you admired the man who started to look more and more delicious under the yellowy lights of the bar. He had a prickly stubble adorning his jawline and his hair was growing gloriously on the top, and there was something enchanting about his wide nose and the way he scrunched it up every single time he took a sip of his drink.

”Uhh…” He seemed reluctant to talk about his history, and you supposed you did come off a little strong. That should have been your sign to back off and be glad you dodged a bullet, but you just couldn’t help yourself.

”Sorry, don’t mean to pry”, you chuckled awkwardly, wiping your hair away from your face and looking down at your hands to avoid his stare.

”Nah, it’s alright”, he was quick to reassure you, something about the soft tone setting your soul alight as you looked back up at him. ”Just… ain’t a very happy story to share, y’know? Don’t wanna dampen the mood”, he continued, and you nodded in understanding before breaking into a teasing smile.

”And what mood is that?” you wondered before wetting your lips, and taking note of the sweep of your tongue, Frank once again found himself speechless before managing a chuckle, one that sounded almost nervous.

”I dunno, you tell me. ’M just enjoyin’ the company of a pretty lady right now”, he shrugged. Again, he hadn’t been looking for anything romantic, but he couldn’t deny being drawn to you already, and lately, he had challenged himself to put himself out there more. He would always miss his wife, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t allowed to find company in someone else after mourning her for years.

The compliment went straight to your head, feeding your already developing attachment. And before you knew it, you were exchanging numbers, an euphoric soar lifting your heart and undeniable excitement pounding at your ribcage with force necessary to break through. You were already being pulled in too deep to writhe away, and there was not a thing you could do to stop yourself from heading down that same path you had trodden so many times before.

When you finally called it a night, Frank, ever the gentleman, walked you to your apartment. And as you reached the front door, you swallowed thickly, knowing very well what was going through both of your minds. In fact, it was as if Frank had read yours.

”Hey, we can just say goodbye for now. No pressure”, he reminded, his hands deep in his pockets as he gave you a sincere look, insisting that he meant every word. You nodded carefully, tearing your gaze from his handsome face, knowing every second you spent looking at his impossibly deep eyes or full lips would only weaken your resolve more and more.

”Don’t get me wrong, I… I want to. But I really shouldn’t, I—I kind of have a bad habit of sleeping on the first date when I don’t even know the person that well and it usually backfires”, you explained shyly, rubbing the back of your neck and finally bringing your eyes back to him, finding a faint smile on his lips.

”I understand, sweetheart”, he promised, giving you a curt nod before taking a step back, ready to leave. Before he did, though, he gave you a look. ”Just so we’re clear, though… that wasn’t a first date. I’mma do it right whenever you have time for me”, he insisted, flashing a grin at you before turning on his heel and walking away, not even giving you time to process.

As you got inside your apartment and sealed the door behind you, an indestructible smile took over your features. So much for not getting attached.

At first, you were able to keep your behavior in check and Frank was none the wiser to your past issues, apart from the small tidbits you offered in return when he finally opened up about his family. He took you on dates, some of them with a great effort put into them, but some of them more lowkey which felt more like Frank. You were perfectly content having wine on the rooftop of his apartment building or sharing a pizza while watching cheesy action on his couch — you were just happy to bask in his company. He seemed perfect, like he could do no wrong, and even when he admitted to his vigilante activities, you saw no fault in him. To you, he was flawless, and you adored him.

But slowly, through the cracks in your facade, the problems you had feared were beginning to show.

It started when he ran into trouble with some criminals he had been after. His mood became irritated and stressed, and you took it to heart. Your own mood soured and you tried your best to help him, unable to stop thinking about him and how he was struggling, your mind in a vicious loop as you sat in the bad feeling. A few days later, he was feeling better, and you instantly felt rejuvenated and alive again, and when the inevitable disappointment came around once more, you couldn’t breathe.

The biggest downside, however, was him putting distance between you and him to avoid you getting caught in all his problems. And distance was not something you handled well. You didn’t know how to communicate it to him, either, so instead, you were left alone in an evil downward spiral.

You messaged. You called. You cried and you begged and pleaded for an answer and reassurance that he still cared about you. It was embarrassing and you felt so vulnerable and hurt that it was almost impossible to bear. You tried so hard to be rational and understand that he was probably in a lot of trouble and danger and he’d pay attention to you as soon as he could, but the wait was killing you. It felt like you were starving without him, like your emotions were bleeding and you didn’t have the tools to stop the flow. You were suffering and it was a pain only he could alleviate.

Eventually, one night, there was a knock on your door and you flew up from the couch where you had been reading over your and Frank’s text messages again and again. Without even bothering to check through the peephole, you swung the door open, and at the sight of Frank, you felt healed. You threw yourself in his arms, hugging him tightly and clinging on for dear life, with your eyes squeezed shut and your face buried into his chest.

”Hey, sweetheart”, he whispered, wrapping his arms around you as he walked into the apartment with a gentle nudge to push you along. He kicked the door shut and carefully pried you off of him, only so he could look into your eyes. ”I’m real sorry I haven’t gotten back to you. Been dealin’ with some scumbags for the past couple of days and it’s been… rough. But I shoulda called you back. That’s on me”, he apologized, a sad look in his eyes as he stared down at you.

”It’s okay”, you breathed out with a smile, ”you’re here now. That’s all that matters.” Just like that, it was like nothing had ever happened, all the pain forgotten now that you were finally back in his embrace. It was so easy to doubt his feelings for you when he was gone, like they ceased to exist when he wasn’t around to prove his affection every second, but now that he was back… you were over the moon.

But the worst was yet to come.

”Yeah, about that, sweetheart…”, he started, and in an instant, your heart sank. ”I… I ain’t here to stay. I gotta get out of town for a while. I got these guys after me…”, he explained, but as he went on, the words didn’t register. All you heard was that he was leaving and that was enough to break you.

Tears welled up in your eyes and you grabbed ahold of Frank’s arm. ”Don’t leave me, please”, you whispered, ”you can’t leave me. Please, Frank.” His heart broke at the sight of you crying, and he reached for your cheek to wipe the tears away with his thumb, but the soft gesture did nothing to comfort your breaking heart.

”I’m sorry, sweet girl, I am”, he spoke, and quietly, he leaned in to kiss your forehead. As his lips collided with your hot skin, you closed your eyes and tightened your hold on his arm, but it didn’t deter him.

Gently but firmly, he undid your grip from him and left. The apartment became painfully quiet, but only for a while, as your loud sobs soon enough broke the peace. You fell to your knees, clawing on your chest as you wept and grieved what felt like a monumental loss.

It was the beginning of the end, you thought. You quickly lost the will to get up in the mornings, to eat, to sleep. In fact, you could no longer see the point in living, at all. You contemplated just putting an end to your miserable existence, feeling not only griefstricken but so goddamn humiliated. You had let yourself get caught up in it again, had let someone in and as always, it ended with you depressed and suicidal at the bottom of your bed.

When were you going to learn?

For the first couple of days, you loathed yourself. Then, your mind started to turn against Frank. He had hurt you, had disappointed you, had hurt you. He had held your heart in his hand and he had just crushed it. How could he do that? He had to be evil. He had to be cruel. It was his fault and his alone. And yet, you would have done anything to have him back.

One week later, that was exactly what happened. There was a knock on your door again and you found the strength to get out of your bed to find out who it was, though you were only hoping for one person.

Much to your relief and delight, when you opened the door, Frank was stood there looking like a kicked puppy, his dark eyes filled with something apologetic and his hands folded in front of him like he was getting ready to beg for your forgiveness.

”Sweetheart, I—”, he began, gulping as he hesitated. ”Your friend called me. Told me everything. About… about you”, he went on, causing your eyes to widen in surprise. You didn’t know how to feel about that revelation. You supposed you had to be grateful to your friend who had visited you in your mourning, because she had brought Frank back to you, but you also felt ashamed. Like Frank saw you in a completely different light now. Surely, he was here to end it with you for good, unable and unwilling to associate with someone as troubled as yourself.

”I didn’t know me leavin’ would hurt you so deeply. I never wanna cause you any pain, baby. I… I’m fallin’ for you and I only left because it wasn’t safe, not ’cause I didn’t care for you. But I understand now that it must’ve been real bad for you when I did that”, he explained, and slowly, you nodded. You raked your fingers through your knotted hair, feeling insecure under the weight of his stare, but he found you just as beautiful as always.

”Are you here to break up with me?” you asked weakly, sniffling as you looked down at your feet. He reacted immediately, lifting your chin with his fingertip and meeting your gaze.

”No. Fuck, never. ’M here to ask you to come with me. I still have a lot to do but I want you on the road by my side. How does that sound, sweetheart?” he proposed, a hopeful smile on his lips.

You couldn’t believe your ears. But sure enough, you mirrored his smile eventually, and your heart came back to life.

”I would love to, Frank”, you sighed, breaking into tears again, this time out of happiness. He quickly pulled you into a hug, squeezing you in his arms and kissing the top of your head. And when he withdrew from you, it was only so he could meet your lips with his own in a tender but loving kiss. It was slow and deep and it took your breath away, your stomach doing backflips as you wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed him back with all your might.

There was still a lot you hadn’t revealed to him, but it was the first time someone had seen you at your lowest and accepted it, welcomed it, and for that, you had a feeling that Frank could really, truly, genuinely be the one.

[aita-blorbos]

AITA for faking my death?

CW: Suicide Source: AU of Canon Characters

I (F) have been presumed dead by my coworkers for many, many years.

Well, I mean, I did die. Mostly. And I didn't mean to. It was an accident.

The thing is, when I "died", an automated message was sent out to all of our coworkers that I had solved the Big Problem we've all been working towards. At first, I did want to tell others... but then I figured that my "death" may give them the kick to find the actual Solution.

That was... a while ago. A Solution still hasn't been found, isn't portable, and isn't generally applicable. And yet I still remain in hiding.

Not only that, but some people have misconstrued death to be the Solution. This has led to an... unfortunate situation pertaining to an old friend of mine (F).

Her younger brother (M) tried to follow in my false footsteps, which has led to him gravely hurting my friend and getting himself sick.

...The irony is that my friend finds herself in a similar situation to mine.

...

I... should have said this sooner, because it seems that the organisms who may be reading this are not well-versed in my kind's predicament. My "coworkers" and I are giant, stationary supercomputers tasked with finding a way to break the cycle of life and death in its entirety. Our creators abandoned us to toil away on this task...

Automated systems within me sent out the false signal, while I was dying. And yet a fragment of the old me remains, one that is able to be far more mobile than my whole structure could have dreamed of.

This same part has also been divorced from my friend's structure, after her brother hurt her. However, I am surprised how... well... she is taking it, and how willing she was to speak to others about it while I just... sit here. Watching the chat messages roll by.

I... should talk to her. And I will. Just... she may not be ready for the truth yet. I'll do what I can to help. Ironically, I am capable of more in this reduced state than I ever was when I was whole. Hopefully I can at least guide her...

I just... I don't know. It's been so long. Too long. And I've carved my own path in the world, one that does not involve any of them. Yet I can't help but... care a bit.

...let's just get this over with. Am I the asshole?

[procrastinationau]

All right I'm posting it. it doesn't really have a title but the google doc's title is "Kimiko goes full Twilight" so let's go with that. I think there's enough context in what I've written that you should be able to get an idea of what the AU is but if you have any questions about this ficlet or the AU don't hesitate to ask!!! please give me any excuse to talk about this AU i've had it since 2012

Rating: T for violence Word Count: 1920 Content warnings: Blood, angst, discussions of death, character death (but not really), sort of brushes up against suicide a little? Does it help if I tell you everyone's gonna be okay?

~~~~~~~

Clay’s bleeding.

It’s not like regular blood - human blood - it’s darker and thicker and seeps out of him slow and sluggish, like hot tar. But it’s blood. Oh, god, it’s definitely blood, and it’s a lot. She’s no vampire but she can smell it, the coppery tang of it, the underlying rot of it.

Kimiko’s blind to everything else around them. She doesn’t know if the others are fighting, if Klofange is gearing up for another attack, if she’s next in the line of fire. All she knows is that Clay is - 

He’s-

He’s not dead, not yet, she’s kneeling next to him and she’s got her hands on his shoulders and she’s shaking him and his eyes are open, there’s the light of consciousness in them but he’s not focusing on her face, he’s not talking, not answering any of her increasingly desperate pleas to “stay with me, Clay, come on, you’re gonna be okay!”

There’s warmth at her side, suddenly, the solid presence of another body, and Raimundo’s voice in her ear. “Shit,” he breathes. “That...that doesn’t look good.”

“What do we do?” That’s Jack’s voice, jeez, she’d forgotten he was here. 

“I don’t know! I don’t exactly know first aid for vampires, dude!”

“Neither do I! I’ve only been one for like five minutes!”

“Blood,” Kimiko hears herself say from miles away. “I...guys, I think he needs blood.”

“Where the hell are we gonna get him blood?” Jack demands. “I don’t see any half-dead hobos around here!”

“Do you have any bags left?” Rai asks.

“Nah, I finished the last one a while ago. And Clay says it’s not a great idea anyway. Something about a lack of nutrients or whatever.”

“Yeah, but this is an emergency. It’s gotta be better than nothing, right?”

“Perhaps-” oh, that’s Omi’s voice - “we can find a nearby farm? Clay did say that animal blood will do in a squeeze!”

Their voices fade to gray static while Kimiko stares down at Clay’s face. He’s still breathing. Does he need to breathe or is it just a habit? She’d never asked him. Either way, his breath is slow and shallow, and his eyelids are fluttering. Shit. Shit, he really doesn’t look good. They’re losing time, he might only have seconds left, and the others are throwing ideas around but Kimiko knows that they don’t have time for any of them.

There’s only one option here.

And in the end, it’s one of the easiest choices she’s ever had to make.

“I need a knife,” she says. Her voice is quiet, but it cuts through the others’ bickering and they all fall silent. 

“A knife?” Jack echoes.

“Yeah.” She looks up at Rai. “Do you have your pocketknife on you?”

“Uh, yeah,” Rai says, reaching for his pocket, “but why-?” His hand freezes and his eyes go wide. He looks at Kimiko. “No,” he says.

“I have to,” Kimiko says. Her voice is calm. Even. Fire-forged and steel-solid.

“No you don’t!” Rai yells. “Kim, you could die!”

“WHAT?!” Jack yelps. Omi lets out a horrified little gasp.

“I won’t,” she says. “Clay said people only die when they’re already sick. I’m fine. I’ll be fine.”

“But,” Omi says, “Clay also said that the people who do not die-!”

“I know.” Her hands curl into fists - they’re still tangled in Clay’s shirt, and she closes her eyes so she doesn’t have to look at his face and takes a deep breath. Holds it. Lets it out. “I know,” she says again. She opens her eyes and looks up at them. Manages a shaky smile. “It’s okay. I’ll be okay.”

“Kim.” Rai kneels down next to her. His face is more serious than she’s ever seen it. “Kimiko, seriously. Don’t do this. We...we can figure something else out.”

Kimiko takes another breath, and sighs. She reaches out with her left arm, puts a reassuring hand on Rai’s shoulder. She smiles softly at him.

“I’m sorry,” she says.

And with her other hand she snatches his knife from the pocket she knows he keeps it in, and before the others can do much more than shout in horror, she’s got the knife open and she’s bringing it down and

she barely registers the flash of pain on her arm, doesn’t stop to watch the blood well up, just brings her wrist up to Clay’s head and presses the cut against his lips and just hopes, hopes that she didn’t just make the stupidest - and last- mistake of her life.

There’s a few long, heartstopping moments where he doesn’t respond, doesn’t move, and her heart drops out of her chest because she’s too late, she wasn’t fast enough - but then she feels it, his lips moving against her skin, and then a light pinch, and then the area’s going numb - his saliva, she thinks he’d mentioned once, something about a numbing agent - and she sags with relief, curls up against him and just,

lets go.

---

Clay’s always been a slow waker. That’s what his momma calls it. He takes his time, gets there when he gets there. This time, for some reason, it takes longer than usual. Like swimming against the current of a strong, slow-moving river.

He’s muzzily aware of voices talking fast and loud and frantic around him, but he can’t make out the words. There’s an ache in his torso somewhere south of his heart, and he just - he hurts all over, which used to be a rare occurrence for him but has become more and more common since he started regularly tangoing with immortal beings who were actually in his supernatural weight class. There’s a weight on top of him - it’s not heavy, but it’s there - and...something against his mouth. Something in his mouth. It’s delicious, it’s hot and sweet and full of life and he’s drinking it down greedily, feeling stronger with every sip he takes, and there’s something so familiar about it but he can’t quite place the sensation.

He’s trying to remember where he is, how he fell asleep. He’s fuzzy on the details, fuzzy on everything really. There’d been...a fight? Some kinda tussle? Something with...with Klofange, yeah, he’d come for Jack and he’d had a gun and Clay had...Clay had…

The voices around him are clearer now, he still can’t quite parse the words, but he knows those voices. They’re familiar. Family. Coven, his instincts whisper, but he shoves that away and tries to focus on the voices. Raimundo and...Omi? Yeah, Omi. They sound real upset. Something must’ve gone wrong, and that sends a faint feeling of alarm spinning through his bleary mind.

He tries harder to push himself up to consciousness, struggling up to the surface of his mind like a rat caught in a barrel of molasses. The taste in his mouth stands out over everything else. It’s familiar. It’s so familiar. It’s sweet and sharp and coppery and-

Blood.

His eyes shoot open and he jolts back to awareness, panic and revulsion roiling him as he tries to get his bearings. There’s - oh God, someone’s arm in his mouth, he’d been feeding and hadn’t even been aware. There’s a weight on top of him too; someone’s on him. Someone’s pressed against his chest. He doesn’t want to look down, doesn’t want to see who it is, even though deep down he already knows exactly who he’ll see. If he looks down, it’ll be real. If he looks down, all his worst nightmares, the things he’s tried so hard not to think about for the last 250 years, will finally come to fruition.

He still has the arm in his mouth. He spits it out, lets it drop to his chest with a limp thud. The blood’ll stain his shirt. He doesn’t care.

Raimundo and Omi are still talking, but he can’t focus on the words. They don’t seem to have noticed that he’s awake yet. He stares off into the middle distance, resolutely avoiding the awful truth of what’s just happened, trying to keep himself calm. He’s always calm. He’s the steady one, the reliable one. Always has been. Always will be. He can’t fall apart. It’s not in his nature. 

There’s a faint groan against his chest, and it - he can’t help it, he’s drawn to the sound like an iron particle to a charged electromagnet. It’s instinctual, and he’ll have to unpack that later because oh God, oh Lord, oh Mercy, it’s Kimiko in his lap, it’s Kimiko with a bloody, open wound on her wrist, it’s Kimiko who he’s been feeding from and she’s alive, she’s alive.

It’s almost worse that she’s alive.

Because he knows what happens to people who don’t die when he feeds from them. He knows that her heart, which is still beating (he can hear it, he can feel it) is pushing his venom through her body, that it’s already begun the work of transforming her into a monster, that there’s no cure, no turning back, no way to fix what he’s begun.

Kimiko’s alive, but it doesn’t matter. He’s killed her either way.

He shifts her in his arms, tries to hold her in a way that’s more comfortable for her. She’s going to be in a lot of pain soon. He has to be gentle. He has to be careful.

“...Clay?”

He flinches at the word, the sound of his name, so cautious, so tentative, so scared. The voice had come from behind him; he looks up, and Raimundo looks down at him. 

“Hey,” Rai says. “Uh...you back with us, dude?”

It takes Clay a minute to answer. He’s still feeling a little out of it, a little disconnected. “Suppose so,” he says. He looks around, head muzzy. “…Klofange?”

Rai laughs, a startled, dry sound. “Oh, yeah, no, Omi took care of him.” He jerks his head towards a shape a short distance away. 

Clay squints at it. It takes him a second to realize what it is but…oh. It’s a big block of ice, with a hulking human form just visible within it. Wow. He wouldn’t have thought that the little guy had it in him.

“Yeah,” Rai says. “He wasn’t messing around.”

“So,” Clay says. “The, uh, rest of y’all are all right?”

“…Yeah,” Rai says. “Omi and I are fine. And Jack, I dunno, but he didn’t seem hurt. Whatever Klofange was trying to do to him didn’t work.”

“Makes sense,” Clay mutters. He tilts his head back and closes his eyes for a second. He feels so weary. “When he was around, vampires only came in one flavor. Stuff that hurts me don’t always hurt Jack, but he wouldn’t know that.”

“I don’t know,” Rai says, “I think a bullet woulda done just about anyone in.”

“Is that what he got me with?” 

“I mean yeah. He had a gun and everything.”

They’re both silent for a long moment. Clay can hear Rai fidgeting, can just pick up the anxious twist of his thoughts. He can hear the question Rai wants to ask, but he doesn’t answer.

After a minute, Rai asks it anyway.

“Is…is she gonna be okay?”

Clay sighs, long and heavy. He opens one eye and peers up at Rai through his bangs. “Depends on how you’re definin’ ‘okay.’”

“Is she…” Rai swallows. “Is she gonna wake up again?”

Thump. Thump, goes Kimiko’s heart.

“Yeah,” Clay says quietly, “but I reckon you won’t want to be around when she does.”

[thevegandarkelf]

Finding Myself, Finding You: Chapter Thirteen

Masterlist

AO3 link

Let me know if you want to be added to the taglist <3 (18+ only, MDNI)

Story is 18+ for mature content/themes, minors do not interact please

TW/CWs for this story--implied/referenced past rape, canonical violence, non-canonical violence, blood, gore, referenced past suicide, swearing, surgery, excessive drinking, nightmares, panic attacks, mention of scars, vomiting, amputation, medical procedures, non-con medical procedures, referenced past medical torture, referenced past drugging, attempted sexual assault, panic attacks, mental health struggles, referenced sibling death, referenced parent death

Each chapter will have its own TW/CWs listed

This story, Lydia Vector, her family & bestie (c) me, TheVeganDarkElf

TWD & its characters (c) AMC & Robert Kirkman, the writer of the comic series

Sleeping Beauty (c) Disney, Wednesday Addams (c) Charles Addams

TW/CWs for this chapter--swearing (there's swearing in every chapter ok), allusion to child abuse (Daryl's history), gagging, mentions of trying not to vomit, a gross story about food coming out someone's nose, mention of scars, mention of blood, mention of needles

Word count: 2.7k

"Ooh, I got one. Do you have an embarrassing story to share? If you share one, I’ll tell you one of mine. Make it fair,” I said.

We’d been driving for a little bit, just shooting the shit on our way to find Aaron a foot. It was nice to sit back and talk with Daryl while we cruised down the empty road. Made things seem a little bit normal, like this was just a cross-country road trip with a friend and not going to find a prosthetic for someone whose foot I had to cut off with an axe after a walker bite. He was easy to talk to, a bit awkward with some of the things he said, but it was an enjoyable experience regardless. The little bits of awkwardness were cute and made me think that maybe he was getting a little nervous, which I thought was adorable. It was going well so far, and I felt like I was actually starting to get to know Daryl, even if it was just a tiny bit.

“Nah, don’t got one,” he said. I crossed my arms over my chest and turned my body slightly in his direction, sighing a little.

“Come on, please? I’m sure you do,” I asked, making a pouty face to tease him, “we all do. If it helps, I have some that are pretty bad.” He looked over at my pathetic attempt of a pouty face, and his features relaxed a little, like he couldn’t say no and was accepting defeat.

“Fine,” Daryl said, “when I was a kid, got lost in the woods and accidentally used poison oak after...yeah. Ass itched somethin’ awful.” I stifled my laugh a bit, though it was mostly the phrase “ass itched somethin’ awful” that made me giggle.

“Oof, that’s brutal. How long were you lost for?” I asked, expecting him to say hours at most, or that he was out camping or something when it happened.

“Nine days. Dad didn’t even know I was gone.”

I could feel my heart breaking for little Daryl. To be lost for that long, especially as a child…how alone and scared he must’ve felt…how he wouldn’t have known what to do to survive and be trying to figure it out as he went, all while trying to get home...and to not even have anyone out looking for you…I knew he would never say it, but it had to be traumatizing. I felt terrible for insisting he share. I’d never felt like such a piece of shit before.

“Why ya look so sad?” Daryl said, looking over at me and seeing the somber expression on my face. There was a tear trying to escape my right eye, but I quickly blinked it back.

I softened the tone of my voice. “You were a child, Daryl. That’s awful. No kid should have to endure that. I’m so sorry.” I wanted to throw myself over the center console and wrap him in my arms and give him a giant hug, but I restrained myself. “I feel like such a piece of shit for pushing you to share, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.”

“’S’alright. Ya didn’t know,” he replied. Something in him looked different, but I couldn’t explain what it was. He seemed more relaxed overall. Maybe no one had shown him that kind of empathy before. Maybe he’d wanted to get that off his chest & he felt relieved. Maybe he was nervous about how I’d react. There was no way for me to tell. That handsome, stoic face of his made it so hard to tell how he was feeling. However, that stoic expression was quickly replaced with a devious little smirk. “Ya can make it up to me by tellin’ a couple stories of your own.”

I raised my eyebrows at him in surprise. “Like more than one? You drive a hard bargain. I gotta think about this.”

“How many ya got?”

“There’s three that come to mind, but you’re only getting two.”

“Why not all of ‘em? Feels fair,” he teased.

"No, if I tell you the worst story, I'll have to throw myself out of this car,” I explained, “it’s bad.”

“If ya tell the worst one, ya only gotta tell one.” I huffed and twirled a chunk of my ponytail around my finger.

“Fine. But I’m warning you, it’s gross.” I took a deep breath and tried not to immediately start gagging at the thought of the story I was about to tell. “So when I was probably 21 or 22, I went on a first date with this guy I met in one of my classes. We met up at this random off-campus restaurant, and I made the terrible mistake of getting spaghetti. Well at one point, he’s telling a story, and I have food in my mouth.” I stopped and covered my mouth as I gagged. “So he’s telling his story, and I sneeze…and I wish I was making this up, but one of the pieces of spaghetti came up through and out my nose…I was trying not to throw up the whole time I was pulling it out. He immediately got up and left. Like didn’t say a single word, just left. I haven’t been able to look at spaghetti since. Even the sight of a box of spaghetti makes me wanna vomit.”

He didn’t say anything at first, but I could tell he was fighting back laughter. All that came out was a small, adorable chuckle. “That’s so much worse than I thought it’d be.”

“Worse? Alright, time to throw myself out of the car,” I said, pretending like I was going to unbuckle my seatbelt. “I never share that story. If we weren’t friends before, we definitely are now. And I think it goes without saying that you’re sworn to secrecy with that story. Are we even now?”

“Yeah. We’re even now,” he replied.

We continued chatting for the short remainder of the ride to this medical center, but I couldn’t stop thinking about how terrible I felt for what felt like forcing Daryl to share such a sad story. I was worried it would have an impact on our interactions when we got back to Alexandria, worried that maybe he hated me now or would never speak to me again once we got back inside the walls. But I felt worse about bringing up what was likely painful memories for him. He seemed alright, and he said we were even, but I wondered if there was another way I could make it up to him.

We turned down one more road, and there was a decently-sized brick building just down the street from the corner. As Daryl pulled into the lot, I read the promising large letters across the top of the building—orthopedic surgery. It wasn’t orthotics and prosthetics, but it was about as close as we were gonna get.

“Ortho surg,” I said as Daryl put the car in park, “nice.”

“That good?” he asked. I grabbed my backpack and put it in my lap, shoving my water bottle back inside.

“It’s potentially promising. If push comes to shove, maybe there’ll be a walker we can steal one off of.” He unbuckled and started to get out of the car, but I reached my hand out and lightly grazed his forearm with the tips of my fingers. “Daryl…are you ok?”

“Yeah,” he said as he turned back to me, clearly confused, “why?”

“Just…the story you shared earlier. I know better than to push people like that, and that was very not cool of me. I’m really sorry if it brought up painful memories for you.”

“Like I said, ya don’t gotta apologize. Ya didn’t know. But thanks,” he said, “apology accepted. Plus, I had ya cryin’ in the store earlier talkin’ ‘bout Eli. We’re good.”

“Oh my god, are we bonding?” I gushed playfully.

“Shut up,” he joked, turning and getting out of the car. I took some things out of my backpack and tossed them into the backseat to make room for anything we might find inside. I brought my spear out and unsheathed it as I got out of the car and followed Daryl inside.

Clearing the office out was easy enough. There were several more walkers than there had been at the other places we’d been to, but it was manageable between the two of us. I walked around to what looked like the front desk area to try to find a directory or anything that could indicate if they had prosthetics, and if so, where they might be stored.

“If you see anything that says orthotics or prosthetics, lemme know,” I said, setting my spear down on the front desk. I started flipping through a binder of random papers while Daryl started checking some of the rooms. There were a few that had keypads on them, which likely meant that there was supplies in there with a code for staff to use. Even if we had the codes, there was no power, so we’d have to manually find a way to break the doors down.

“Find a paperclip or somethin’,” Daryl called out to me from down the hall, “we can try to pick the locks.” The binder I was looking through didn’t seem to be useful, so I started searching drawers for office supplies. I pushed my sleeves up to my elbows. It was starting to get warm, and I was regretting wearing a jacket without a shirt underneath. One of the drawers had a small box of paper clips in it. Score.

“Got it!” I yelled. I grabbed my spear and jumped back over the desk, scuttling down the hall to meet Daryl. I took a larger clip out of the box and handed it to him. Our fingers briefly touched again, and there was that same electric feeling from this morning when our fingers touched as he handed me my coffee. The same electric feeling from when my fingers grazed his forearm in the car before we came inside.

He slung his crossbow across his back and straightened out the paperclip. Getting down on one knee, he started trying to pick the lock, and I went back to try to find something that would tell us what was in these closets. I could hear him fiddling around with the lock, and eventually, a click echoed through the silence of the office.

“Got it,” he said, and I could hear him cautiously pushing the door open.

“Lockpicking just increased to 30,” I whispered to myself as I went down the hall to meet him.

This particular storage closet had mostly been cleared out. It looked like it was used to store gowns, paper for the beds, gloves, masks, braces, and probably some first aid stuff. There was a box of gloves and some braces, so I went over and put those into my backpack.

“Damn it,” I huffed, “alright, let’s try another one. I’ll keep trying to find a map of this place or something.”

I rummaged around the front desk more before finding a paper map that had been thrown in a trash can. I pulled it out and held it up so it matched the direction I was facing. It looked like a poorly scanned paper copy of another poorly scanned paper copy, so the text that was legible enough was tiny and barely legible. I could make out “pros” on one of the square spaces.

“Daryl, I think I found it.” I was already walking back towards him when I yelled out, looking down at the map at the tiny print as I walked, and I bumped right into him. He was standing in front of another closet door, which he had already picked open.

“So did I,” he said, stepping into the room.

Looking around, there were shelves of different types of prosthetics, including feet, hands, partial arms, full arms, etc. I figured they were likely used for fittings so a prescription could be submitted for the right size and type, but there were options, which is what we needed.

"Geez. Someone with a foot fetish would have a hay day in here,” I joked, “try to find different sizes. One of them is bound to fit. Oh, Aaron’s gonna be so excited when I show him.” My face was lit up. I felt like I was getting to do something similar to my type of specialty again. I got down on the ground and grabbed a couple of prosthetic feet, placing them into my bag. There was just enough room for both of them. I grabbed a third and held it in my hands, flipping it around and daydreaming about my days in the ER.

“Ya okay?” Daryl asked me, squatting down next to me. He had grabbed a few prosthetics and put them in his bag as well, carrying a couple more under his arm.

“I just miss my job is all,” I said, continuing to flip the fake foot around in my hand as I talked, “I sat with people on what was usually the scariest day of their entire life. Sat with them while they died. Yeah, it was intense. But I think it’s what I was meant to do. It was fulfilling. It gave me purpose.” A single tear escaped my eye, and I quickly wiped it away with the back of my hand. “Sorry, I don’t mean to get all cheesy and shit.”

“Your patients were lucky to have ya,” he said. I could see in my peripheral vision that he was staring at my scars as I fiddled around with the prosthetic. I pulled my sleeves back down to cover the thick bands of scar tissue.

“That means a lot. Thank you.” I wiped another tear away with the back of my hand, laughing a little. “God, you’re gonna make me cry again.”

“C’mon. Might as well clear the place out. Still got upstairs to do,” Daryl said, lifting himself back to his feet.

We made several trips in and out, carrying out all of the prosthetics we could. It would be good to have these in the infirmary in case I had to perform another amputation. After that, we went upstairs. The second floor contained a blood draw station and an X-ray lab.

“Blood draw might have some stuff,” I said, going behind their front desk, “don’t reach into any sharps containers though.”

There were some more boxes of gloves and masks, rubber bands for putting on people’s arms to take samples, needles, and alcohol pads. I found an empty sharps container to put the needles in and carried out what I could in my arms.

“Good luck charm strikes again,” Daryl joked. He grabbed some of the boxes of gloves and followed me back downstairs.

After we loaded the car and got back in, I laid back in my seat and stared up at the ceiling, feeling exhausted from all the hard work we’d put in. I was sweating buckets, and I felt disgusting.

“We crushed it,” I said, holding my hand up for a high-five, which Daryl returned, “teamwork makes the dream work.” I turned my head towards him. “Thanks for bringing me here so I could get a prosthetic for Aaron. He won’t need it for a while, but I’m gonna have to stop myself from telling him in the meantime. I wanna make it a surprise.”

“Welcome,” he said as he backed us out of the lot and onto the road back to Alexandria, “what else ya gotta do today?”

“Uh, well I’m starving, so I guess start with that. Rosita said she wanted to see me, and I need to reorganize the infirmary now that we have all of this to sort through. What about you?”

“Don’t got watch ’til later. Do what you gotta do, I can make us food.” I smiled and turned my head back up towards the ceiling.

“Thanks Daryl.”

He was such a sweetie. And I was falling very hard, very fast, with no idea where I was going to land.

Taglist: @raddydaddydude

[projectbluearcadia]

My World's Paralysis

[ Trigger Warning - Suicide, Suicide survivor. Suicide is never the answer. People care about you. Reader Discretion Advised ] I unabashedly admit this is partly based on Pokemon Mystery Dungeon. Track 047. If you know, you know.

Lucifer finds himself wandering throughout the Devildom, eventually tracing Annelie to the cliff where she had sat the day prior.

Lucifer: Of all the places... it's no wonder I found no luck...

He winces and braces himself as he looks over its edge, but no trace of Annelie's body is found. Harsh waves lap at the stony shore.

Lucifer: You could at least leave your body intact for me...

Lucifer suppresses a sob.

Lucifer: Oh, Annelie, you stupid woman...

Lucifer sinks to the ground and finally lets his tears start to pour down his face.

Lucifer: You stupid fucking woman... I loved you, you idiot... why couldn't you accept that? Why didn't you let me help you? Why?!

Lucifer stares back down at the rushing water, glaring at it, when he notices a distortion in the air a few paces away from his feet.

Lucifer: ...

Lucifer jerks his hand into the distortion without caution and thrusts it open with a sharp hiss. As if realizing something, his eyes widen, and he practically jumps to his feet to dive into the ripple in space.

Lucifer: My... bedroom?

Lucifer looks around, bemused, until he realizes said room does not have an exit, and its features are warped and monochrome. He wanders and starts to pick things up, inspecting them and putting them back.

Lucifer: Annelie, where have you taken me...?

Lucifer's eyes catch the sight of his coffee table, embedded into the floor with a black gemstone fitting neatly into its center. He urgently tries to prise it from the table.

???: I wouldn't do that if I were you.

Lucifer whips around to see a familiar face. He snarls.

Lucifer: How did you get back out of that book?

???: Mm... not really getting 'out'. More like a split consciousness sort of deal? Not really important. Anyway, only reason you're seeing me is because Anne is... well, a bit more than incapacitated, and somebody just needs to tell Prince Charming what's up and what's down.

Lucifer: Stop calling me that.

???: Nah. So anyway, Prince Charming, you can settle. I designed that heart, so don't you think you should listen to me?

Lucifer: ...

???: There we go. Now then, let me walk you through this a bit. Anne jumped off that cliff-

Lucifer: ...

???: Okay, I regret saying that so frankly; please don't make that face at me. But that's the moment where things grow a little... complicated. I make things to last, and although I didn't necessarily anticipate it, Anne's heart is basically a battery as a result of that. Her consciousness is tethered to it permanently, so technically speaking, even when that battery is dead, she still has some semblance of consciousness.

Lucifer: Where are you going with this?

???: Well... At the moment, her consciousness is stretched and ballooned around you from its source. Frozen.

Lucifer pauses.

Lucifer: Are you... Are you saying that if I try to remove that heart, her consciousness will no longer be associated with it?

???: Ah, good, you're smart. Yeah, that's pretty much the sum of it. With enough time, her consciousness will disappear entirely as her residual magic gets used up, and my pretty little heart will be nothing more than an expensive gemstone.

Lucifer: Can't you tether it back?

???: That's the tricky part. I can't. Even if the power in my host book wasn't all gone, I still wouldn't be able to. Call it free will or something, but she started to undo the connection herself. Which is super annoying for me, because I thought I covered my bases with that.

Lucifer: ...

???: Okay, sorry, I shouldn't have said that either. But um, yeah, I don't really know how to fix this mess. I mean, I'm sure... there's something you can do? Seriously, please don't cry. Anne's personality corrupted this part of my consciousness, so you'll make me cry too.

Lucifer: ...

[darklydeliciousdesires]

Light on the Darkside - Chapter Seventeen.

Huge thanks as ever to my little audience for your continued support of my story :)

Previous chapters - One Two Three Four Five Six Seven Eight Nine Ten Eleven Twelve Thirteen Fourteen Fifteen Sixteen

Tag list - In the comments. Please DM to be added/removed.

Words - 3,551

Warnings - 18+ throughout. Topics cover depression, suicide and eating disorders. Minors DNI!

“They’re gonna think I’m shagging you in here, you know,” Steve spoke as 4am rolled around, listening to music playing quietly as he and Andrea lay side by side on his bed. 

She shrugged. “Hmm, the absence of sexy sounds might negate that.”  

“Oh, and I’d make you do all of ‘em. The entire fucking orchestra!” 

“Even the clarinet?” 

He threw his head back, laugh booming, that same laugh that had attracted her to him in the first place. “Especially the bloody clarinet!” 

She reached for him, stroking his face, marvelling at how lovely he was. On the inside of the slightly uncouth, very sexually free man lay a person of much greater depth, one whom she shared so many common interests with. God, it had hit her hard, just how much she liked him. It very much went the same for the man himself, too. 

“I meant it though, when I said I’d wait for you to be ready.” It was the tenth time he’d stated that emphatically in the last four hours. “I know I’m a man whore, I know. But with you, I wouldn’t be. Never fucking met a girl like you before, Ands.” 

Blushing, she hid her face behind her hand, laughing softly, sinking deeper into the pillows. “Nope, you ain’t doing that just for me. Not with the absolute flock of bloody women I saw checking you out tonight.” 

“I will, though. Just you see. You can’t have casual sex and nah, I don’t want it to be casual when you finally let me, so there you have it. Gone and got me attached to ya an’ all that.” He paused, leaning in close, nose touching hers. “Ya dickhead.” 

God, the sparkle of her laugh, Andrea poking him in the cheek with her fingernail before leaning to offer a soft kiss. Kissing was fine, just as long as that was all it was. Much to his surprise, he was fine with that, too.  

As he’d sat there talking to her, both becoming hugely excited that the things they were into were shared in passion by the other, his other rotation of women had flitted from his brain one by one. He should have been scared, that at twenty-two and after only knowing her for eleven hours, he was ready to hang up his very much single and ready to mingle status for her solely.  

He wasn’t, though. Not at all.  

Why? He’d found her.  

He didn’t tell her what he’d revealed to James and Ella either, that somehow he knew intrinsically that she was the girl he’d marry one day. He sensed he’d likely scare her off with such a rapid declaration, but he knew. He just knew, something deep within his soul was touched by the magic of hers, giving him a feeling of complete peace unlike any other girl he’d ever been with. And he hadn’t actually been with her yet in the physical sense.  

What was more? It wasn’t scary at all. He’d gone from twenty-two and unwilling to be tied down, to ‘yep, here she is. This one here. This is the girl’ in the space of an evening. He only felt sublimely peaceful about that, too. The fact he didn’t feel scared at all was what sealed it for him.  

“What are you grinning at?” she asked, her hand wandering to stroke the scruff where his short, dark beard flecked his neck. 

Looking down at her, he reached to rub the apple of her freckled cheek with his thumb, his smile widening even more. “You’ll see.” 

“Don’t you be getting any ideas!” 

He chuckled, resting his head down. “Furthest thing from my mind, honey.” And it honestly was. While they continued to cuddle and chat, things were certainly a lot less calm across the other side of the flat, James and Ella still enjoying themselves after a brief nap. 

The pace did not take on anything close to the raging desire that had bubbled up between them after that sleep, though, more a soft adagio, a slowly hummed symphony, James pausing to look down upon her, drinking in the moment, the soft blue of her eyes, his hands stroking her face and neck.  

The divine glide of his lips over her collarbones, those warm kisses tingling upon her skin had Ella feeling heady right from the start. Her hands toured his back, delighting in the play of such hard muscles, his own gliding down her sides as she arched against him, the prickle of his teeth at her nipple jolting her, lips sucking, tongue swirling.  

His mouth lowered, the press of his hands at her waist tightening, the circling of his tongue around her navel evoking a spread of heat to flush through her core. He lowered more, kisses sprinkled just above her pubic mound, gently biting where her neatly trimmed, blonde curls grew, growling, making her giggle. 

She anticipated his toying of her, her body jolting with need against each press of his lips. “Don’t you dare tease me.” She prodded his cheek, James biting her finger, sucking it into his mouth.  

He chuckled deeply. “I’m not.” That gravelly rumble, it made her heart skip several beats. “I’m enjoying you. Now, shut up and let me take my fucking time, innit.”   

Moving back up, he began leaving hot, open-mouthed kisses over her chest and down her sides, keenly watching her skin bounce, goosepimples summoned forth, the faintest of moans slipping from her parted lips. Just that alone had him waging battle against his own resolve, not to give in to the thirsty longing he harboured to wrap his mouth around her cunt and suck.    

He set his teeth against the rise of her hip, a sharp nip shocking her, the swirl of his tongue soothing, his lips gliding to her inner thigh. The scent of her was beyond comprehension to his burning senses, Eden stirred within him.   

He watched her while running his tongue up her thigh, the pleading in her eyes, the soft, lustful quakes of her heavenly body. Kissing his way back down again, he teased her slit with the quickest, briefest of licks, not even delving to the pink splendour within, mouth gliding up her other thigh.    

Heat trickled down her spine at the promise of where his mouth would settle, her pulse rapid, breathing escalated, his hands stroking her legs as his tongue toured the rise of her hip.  

“This is teasing, BFG.” 

He shrugged, moving his long curtain of hair until it splayed over his scratched up back, grinning smugly. “Be patient, little.” 

Pushing her legs further apart with a strong press of his hands, his mouth began to lower, not able to hold himself back. Each kiss from her hip to her pubic mound was placed slowly, agonisingly slow, little flicks of his tongue making her quiver, until he levelled with her sex and finally, took a long, languid lick.    

The noise she made caused his cock to throb, the softest of moans, kissing at her before his hands moved to spread her open, his tongue delving right in, the sensation knocking her sideways. He might have already had his mouth around the petals of her sex multiple times that night, but he was so damned good at it, it was like the first time every time.  

His tongue rolled a slow, firm circle around her bud, eyes opening, watching her as she viewed him, his lips wrapping to suck. The action had sparks crackling through her, the softest of exclamations leaving her mouth as her hips twitched. She felt like she was burning in water and drowning in fire, her head thudding back on the bed as her hands rooted into the silky midnight of his hair.  

His fingers held her spread, tongue circling at her opening, groaning at the taste of her silky arousal, dipping inside her, the heat of her core astounding to his senses. Another long drag from the flat of his tongue had her mewling, her back arching from the bed, heaven surging through her strongly.  

She keened against each lick, her muscles tensing as he began to focus in on her clit again, tongue swirling her little, potent bud, her moans escalating as glimmers shot through her, James chuckling gruffly as he witnessed her spiral. “Does that feel good, babe?”  

“I... oh... fuck!” she tremored. His sexual gifts lay very much with his mouth, as his girlfriend knew well by that point.  

He licked at her keenly, her clit swelling against the wet heat that drove cool fire throughout her, her body buzzing as her breaths escalated, his cheeks hollowing as she hissed out a moan.    

One hand gripped her thigh, the other moving to plunge two fingers inside of her, his response at the viscid clench a sharp bite at her inner thigh. Ella shook, her head spinning with the sheer eroticism of it, of him. His fingers curled and crooked, stroking her deftly, seeking her sweet spot and pressing hard when he found it, evoking a shrill cry.    

Those cries continued with every breath as he began to build her, the lightning bouncing beneath her skin as heat sizzled up her spine, her legs tensing. He worked his tongue against her faster, exorcising her release as she shook uncontrollably, her hands tugging at his hair. The heat of it snapped through her like a summer storm, tumbling through throbbing bliss as she came, left shaking in the wake of it.    

He took his time, returning his mouth to hers, trailing kisses all over her body, Ella still panting hard when his lips finally captured hers again, her hand gliding down his chest, the gentle drag of her fingernails making him shudder. When she closed her grasp around his cock, his chest tightened, groaning low, biting her nipple while she turned him onto his back. Moving astride him, she guided his cock to her, sinking down, her mouth dropping open.   

She was a little sex sore, but god, that did not mean she wanted to cease. He sat up beneath her, arms tightening around her as she slowly began to rock against him, hands flexing upon one another, tongues entwining when his lips returned to hers. 

She was spread wide around him, the aqueous clench of her cunt pulling him in, flexing softly, splitting her until she saw sparks. She hissed as he pushed up a little deeper into her, rutting her fully, moving his mouth to hers. “You’re so fucking beautiful.” he whispered, one hand moving to stroke her cheek as their kisses deepened, both feeling as if they were riding the crest of a sun kissed, sparkling wave. 

His kisses were devouring, the stroking of his hands consuming, his hips rolling in perfect sync with hers, Ella feeling overcome by him, that moment, everything. How could a union so perfect exist? With him, it was beyond euphoria, gilded in nirvana, a rush of unstoppable glimmers.  

The rhythm, the roll, the heat of it, it bordered on almost intolerable. Her nipples were sucked on in turn, James moving to lay her on her back, driving into her hard, his hand clasping her jaw, turning her head to demand more kisses. He stole them from her lips thirstily, tongue swirling with hers, his groans barbarous, making her walls pulse around him, his cock dragging slowly.  

He held back the desire to pound her into the bed, to just enjoy the skitters of slow ebullience, but it slipped from him as he watched her, pulling her legs back against her chest. The sight of her cunt splayed, glistening and hot around the thick of him, those moans… how she had him fixated entirely, in just the way she softly moaned. Those sweet purrs were the catalyst to him speeding up each thrust, watching her mouth fall open, hand gently gripping her throat before feeding her his thumb, watching her suck it.    

“Fuck me harder, please.” she breathed, licking the tip of his thumb, her eyes a blaze of lust and everything that was sin-drenched beauty. Her words shot right to his hips, and he did as she demanded. He fucked her so hard, she screamed, the pleasure of it daggering, her insides crammed so full of his thick cock, every nerve ending alight with sizzling pleasure. 

“Fuck, you look so fucking pretty when you’re getting shagged ragged.” His eyes closed tightly as he felt a wave of utter bliss lap against his spine, rolling through him as he came deep within her, knocked sideways by the force of his orgasm, grinning as he leaned to kiss her.  

She couldn’t answer for wailing, James winking at her through a very satisfied smirk, loving how much she was thriving on it.  

The twitches of his cock took her there, sent her to the edges of euphoria, her nails dragging his chest, the rumble of his groan causing her insides to throb. He slowed a little, kissing her ankle, giving her long, more contained strokes, his thumb moving to begin rubbing pure sparks of pleasure at her clit, Ella completely lost to the rapture of his fuck.   

“James, you’re... still hard?” 

He looked down at his cock and then back at her with a wink. “It happens sometimes, I can come and keep going. Don’t complain, innit.” 

Complain? Oh, no. Never.  

After a few moments of slowness, power and speed drove him wildly once more, her soaking walls flexing around him, his thumb rubbing with more purpose as her flutters became harder on his cock. His eyes never left her as she came again, her body arching off the bed, consumed by a bonfire of pleasure. He slowed to allow her to recover, moving to begin kissing her neck, his hands running through her glossy, blonde tresses, the little quivers of her body against him scintillating beyond words.    

The pleasure kept prickling at her, biting, sharp, his cock daggering her a little quicker again, mouth moving to indulge upon her throat, his teeth leaving red crescents from soft bites, his groan deep. He arrowed her with all-in, all-out thrusts, a slight rotation of his hips making her soar through endless constellations as her still sensitive walls were split wide around him.    

“I think you need to get on your back,” she suggested, James’s eyebrow arching curiously.    

“Nah. I like having you pinned.” She had ammunition for such a notion.  

“Oh, don’t want to watch my tits bounce while I ride you into the bed then, no?” He knew he was being played, but he was willing to let her. Clutching her body to his, he turned over, Ella pushing herself up and sinking down further, the depth of him incredible.    

He expected her to be frenzied as she leaned down to kiss him, her hands touring his chest, squeezing his nipples, her mouth moving to his neck and pecs before she straightened again. Instead, she began by giving him deliciously teasing alternation, riding him rapidly one minute to slow right down the next, delighting in the thick head of his cock dragging her creamy heat slowly. How she fucked him was simply mind-melting, sparks crackling, making his heart thunder, his groans causing her insides pulse with desire.  

He rolled his hips up, rutting her deep, pulling her down to share heated, syrupy kisses as he trawled her cunt, her slick muscles twitching around him as he stroked her breasts, pinching her nipples into stiffened peaks. He’d never fail to feel proud of her, that he was part of the reason why she now loved her body and had confidence in it instead of hating something so beautiful.  

She rode him with a hard grind, her nails stroking his chest as he gripped her hips, loving the view of her atop him. A soft gasp spilled from her throat as he moved his hand, thumb at her clit again, groaning gutturally as she moved against him in the most sexual serpentine he could remember experiencing with a woman. Lord, she was good.    

They both began to climb the ladder leading to nirvana, ascending, glowing, moving determinedly as they chased their releases. Sweat gleamed their bodies, Ella’s voice breaking a howling cry as he propelled himself up into her faster, his fingers at her hip digging in hard as he felt himself towed headlong into bliss.  

He groaned wantonly as his cock twitched, his thumb frantic at her clit, wanting to take her with him into the realms of utter beauty. Nerve endings throbbed until it was upon them both, glimmering rays rising, his sunlight illuminating her horizon as she cried out uncontrollably. Each clench milked the release from his spasming cock, filling her with cum, his growl all gravel, eyes closed, breathless, swimming in ecstasy as she collapsed atop his chest.    

They were asleep within ten minutes, Ella waking up with a sizeable hangover at just gone half past ten the following morning, still on top of her boyfriend beneath the covers. The room was freezing, a very bleary James rubbing his face as he stirred, muttering something about tea as she pulled on fresh knickers and one of her big sweaters, leaning to kiss him.  

“I’ll be back with it in a minute.” 

“Nah, I’ll be with you in a sec. Gonna need a fat joint to smoke. Head is fucking ruined. Ugh. I ain’t getting drunk again.” She could believe he likely meant it, too. It was no mere idle threat from the size of his hangover.  

Leaving the bedroom, she clicked the boiler into life, the November cold very much felt in the flat when the heating went off. Filling the kettle, she looked over to the sofa to see Snedders beneath blankets, his soft snores filling the space, coming round the side of where the counter ended to check on her sleeping guest. 

The airbed was vacant of Andrea.  

Bolting back to the bedroom, she pointed through the doorway, eyes wide as a naked James was pulling himself into his jeans. “We have a situation! A big time situation of the Andrea not being on the airbed type!” 

He closed his eyes with a small groan, his laugh rumbling. “He’s a bad lad.”  

“He’s a fucking man whore!” she cried, moving from the room again just as Steve’s bedroom door opened, the man himself walking out casually, still in last night’s clothes.  

“Alright, Ells,” he chirped, taking two mugs and beginning to decant coffee and sugar into them. “Surprised you can stand up with the fucking nailing Jim was giving you through the small hours.” 

“Innit,” her boyfriend smirked, heaving himself up to sit on counter. 

“Less of my sex life! You’ve been in there with my friend all night!” she charged him with, pointing at him sternly. 

“Yeah, I have. Proper fucking knackered, too.” 

“Steve!” she growled, smacking him between the shoulder blades. 

“Oi, calm it, Greenhall! Ain’t what you’re imagining. We stayed up talking, just talking, until about eight. She’s quality, your mate.” Folding his arms, he then arched an eyebrow. “That’s all we did, ask her yourself.”  

“He isn’t lying, Ella,” Andrea called. “He was the perfect gentleman. Well, as much as he’s capable of being."  

James’s face was a picture of confused. “You’ve had a woman in there all night and you didn’t shag her brains out?” 

“Yeah.” 

“Who the fuck are you and what have you done with Steve?” 

He laughed, pouring water into the mugs, adding milk to Andrea’s and giving them a quick stir. “See you two later.” With that chirp delivered, he made his way back into his bedroom, something Andrea muttered making him guffaw with laughter. Ella and James could only share perplexed looks.  

“But he's... and she... and...” she stated, gesturing with her hand at Steve’s now closed again bedroom door. 

“I think we’re still asleep, babe, because nah. Ain’t no way he wasn’t bouncing her on his dick for half the fucking night. That’s top grade suspicious behaviour, innit?” James spoke, rubbing a heavily ringed hand down his face with a slight groan. “We got any paracetamol? Fucking need some. My head hurts. Total bullshit, this hangover crap.” 

She was mid-way back from fetching the pack from the bathroom when the phone began to ring, racing to grab it so it didn’t wake Snedders from his slumber. 

“Hello?” 

“Ella, it’s Carole. Is my son there?” 

Her stomach dropped instantly, walking with the cordless phone and handing it over to James. “It’s your mum.” 

Taking it from her, he had two simple words. “Fuck off.” Clicking the button, he placed it down, shaking his head. “She needs to understand I’m done with her shit.” 

Ella could hardly blame him for that, returning the phone to the base unit, seeing it begin to ring again. “If it ends in two one two eight, it’s her again.” James called to her, Ella checking the display to see that it did, cancelling the call.  

Carole tried another four times that day, being hung up on every single time. Those calls continued to persist over the next week, every time the same. From James’s standpoint, he was truly done with her nonsense. His mother, though, was nothing but a very adamant woman. 

[squish36-writes-and-draws]

4 November: Unraveling

Word count: 546

General Taglist (lmk if you want to be added/removed!): @stellar-lune @faggot-friday @kamikothe1and0nly @nyxpixels @florida-preposterously @poppinspop @uni-seahorse-572 @solreefs @corruption-exe @rusted-phone-calls @when-wax-wings-melt @good-old-fashioned-lover-boy7 @dexter-dizzknees @abubble125 @hi-imgrapes @callum-hunt-is-bisexual @callas-pancake-tree @hi-my-name-is-awesome @katniss-elizabeth-chase @sillyguy-supreme @void-kill @thefoxysnake

Unraveling Project Specific Taglist (lmk if you want to be added/removed/upgraded): @cutebisexualmess @crippling-pages @daizythegreat @sophiefostersno1stan @iggydancebreak @theleopardstalker @you-will-meet-your-downfall @multi-fandom-lunatic

TW: Swearing, allusion to a literary suicide. It is in a /j way but I want to be careful.

On Ao3 or below the cut!

Previous / Next

Keefe Sencen's Journal

Apparently I’m in a city named Sydney unless my new chess-playing friend is a lying liar who tells lies. I have no concrete reason to believe that, but I still haven’t gotten her name yet. I think she’s taking it as a personal challenge to tell me literally everything else about her life before that, which I respect on a spiritual level. 

She also, for all intents and purposes, had literally nothing better to do, which is good for me because I don’t either and I was starting to get bored enough that I was going to try to find a library. Yeah, sure, I had valiant hopes of learning about where I am and how human history and culture work but let’s be fucking for real, I was close to pulling out my eyelashes like the Mysterous Miss F just to have some entertainment. I should probably write something for the Mysterious Miss Chess Player to explain why I am constantly loitering in that park and why I haven’t said anything and why I keep staring at that little crease between her brows. 

It’s nothing, I swear. It’s just that when she concentrates too hard on a problem, she gets the same crease between her brows that Foster does. I’m not saying that I’ve abandoned all hope, but, to be realistic, I’m never going back there, so what’s the real harm in, if not moving on, liking someone else? Stars, I don’t even know the boundaries of my own feelings anymore, but the pounding of my heart and the fact I’ve dropped this pen twice seems to be a decent indicator of the fact that I’m in the trenches of the eternal horror that is having a crush. I don’t really know how to process it. I’ve been so focussed on Foster for so long that I’ve forgotten what these first few stages are like. If I’m unlucky, I’ll be drawing hearts in the margins tomorrow and be Romeo and Julieting myself off a cliff by the weekend. 

And if it doesn’t work out, I’ll just let RNGsus take the wheel again and spin that pathfinder so I don’t have to deal with the consequences of my actions. I’ve got eternity ahead of me and at least a hundred possible destinations so I’m allowed to fuck up a few times as a treat. 

The other major theme of the day is that between the air pollution and the sheer volume of emotions crashing through me at any given moment, slight movements are starting to make me dizzy, and I don’t like what that implies for the fate of my empathy. I can’t wait for this stupid command ability to be gone so I can actually have a conversation, but until then, it seems as though I’m going to be a fucking mess. So exactly what everyone expected, just with a couple extra steps to make it interesting. 

My food stash is also starting to run low, so that’s going to be something I’ll want to deal with soon. It’s probably time to start planning my master plan of bank heistery. Nah, but like, for real I’ll probably just draw some shitty pictures and hope for the best. I should probably get to doing that actually. 

[jpitha]

Hidden Depths: A Side Story

Some Other Time...

"Say Gord..." Vivenni looks up from her Pad. They're onboard Hat in-between worlds and passing time while Hat calculates the link back to Earth. "How long do AIs live?"

"How long do we live?" Gord reaches up and scratches his sandy blond hair. "You know, I'm not sure. I think the answer will effectively be 'as long as we want.' "

Vivenni flicks an ear, a K'laxi raised eyebrow. "So you're immortal?"

Gord shakes his head "No, nothing like that. We just don't get old and our bodies don't fail like other biological bodies do. I still need maintenance, and I can still be killed, but I won't like.." He gestures awkwardly "-get old and decrepit first."

At this point Medicine Hat chimes in "But Gord, what about SunFire?"

Firmly, Gord replies. "No. That doesn't count. That was practically a suicide."

"They didn't technically die Gord."

"They might as well have. Hell, some might think what they did was worse than death."

Vivenni ping-pongs between them talking and finally manages "Who was SunFire, what did they do?"

There is silence. Gord looked at Vivenni surprised. In the intensity of the conversation with Hat, he forgot she was there.

Hat finally answers. "I think you can tell her Gord."

Gord sighs heavily. "Fine. But Vivenni, I'm trusting you with one of the largest secrets of AIs. Not a word to anyone, BI or AI. I mean it."

Vivenni nods nervously. "But the AIs know the story?"

Gord nods. "The old ones do. And if they hear you even breathe their name, they'll know I blabbed and I'll never hear the end of it."

Vivenni takes a breath. "Okay Gord, Hat. I promise. Not one word to anyone."

Satisfied, Gord begins:

"Just about eight hundred years ago, the wormhole generators were invented. Did you know they weren't invented on Earth?"

"No? Where then? One of the Colony worlds?"

"Nah, someone on a research station on Ganymede developed it. They actually put themselves in a singleship without an AI and went to Parvati all on their own! We didn't even know they did it until they came back loaded with souvenirs and letters from Parvati basically going "No, really, he did it!"

Vivenni shook her head "Why am I not surprised. That's such a human thing to do."

Gord chuckled. "Yeah, it is."

He leaned back in his chair. "Anyway, overnight the entire balance of power in human space changed. Going to Parvati was nearly an instant trip now instead of taking 25 years. The colonies could talk to each other instead of going through Earth, Venus and the OPA.

"The OPA?"

"The Outer Planet Alliance. The colonies and cities out in the outer planets of the Sol System; Ganymede, Titan, The Orbitals around Saturn and Neptune as well as the Kuiper Independent Cities. They were all small, so they banded together loosely when they needed representation."

"Your system is so crowded!" Vivenni remarks. "Almost as soon as we went to space, we found the Warp Gate and were able to expand."

"Yeah, well Sol never had one, so we had to do things the old fashioned way." Gord stops. "Say, did you ever figure out where the Warp Gates came from, or who made them?"

"Huh. I don't know." Vivenni looks up for a moment and then back down. "I never really thought about it."

"We should head to K'lax and ask someday." Hat says. "I'd be interested to know too."

Gord nods. "Sure, I'm up for that. So, with the balance of power changing, the Starjumpers were worried about what was going to happen to us."

"Wait, us?" Vivenni cuts in.

"Yes. I was City of Lethbridge. I'd run Earth, Venus and then Parvati. Hat was there too back then, but we only knew each other peripherally."

"I was still Medicine Hat, and I did mostly in-system shuttling."

"Thanks Hat." Gord took a sip of coffee. He didn't need to drink or eat, but he liked doing it. "Anyway, there was this Starjumper, SunFire. Nice fellow actually. Loved their job. They did the OPA - the Outer Planet Alliance - to Parvati. Lots of folks in the OPA didn't much care for those on the rocky worlds, and wanted to make their own way.

I'm getting off track. SunFire sailed between the OPA and Parvati and loved it. More than anyone I've ever met really. They would say that their favorite part was after boost when they had shut their Stardrive down, and it was just them coasting at half the speed of light, silent in the deep of interstellar space. Some of us went into Low Awareness mode then; there wasn't much to do and it can get mighty boring, especially on the longer runs, but not SunFire. They stayed fully aware the whole time."

"Low Awareness mode?"

"Like..." Gord struggled with a metaphor. "Like napping? You're not really awake and not really asleep and time passes faster, but if something comes up you can get up and running quickly to address the issue."

"Oh okay." Vivenni picks a maple candy from the plate between them and eats it. "Please continue."

"With the development and adoption of the wormhole generators, governments came to us. They wanted wormhole generators, but they also didn't want to mothball a bunch of really large Starjumpers. We were all given an option. We could stay Starjumpers and get the wormhole generators installed, we could be transferred to another kind of ship, like an destroyer, or frigate or transport ship, anything we wanted - they said we would have our pick. Or we could 'retire' and be given bodies and enter the general population.

"Is this when you got your body Gord?"

"The first time yes. I was super jazzed about it actually. Most of the Starjumpers opted to stay Starjumpers and get the wormhole generator installed." He paused for a moment, thinking. "Being a Starjumper was - is - prestigious. We were the big dogs, the fast sleek ships that went everywhere that regular ships couldn't. But all of a sudden, any tiny in-system ship could link over in a blink. People still thought of us as special though, just not...as special."

Gord looked serious. "SunFire didn't take it well."

"Why not?" Vivenni looked around for more maple candy, but it was all gone.

Hat cut in here. "Who knows why. They were always a bit of an odd duck. It wasn't usual to like interstellar space that much."

Gord nodded agreement. "So, on the deadline day to make their decision, they took another option. They turned towards a random star and fired their Stardrive."

Vivenni gasped. "Where were they going?"

Gord shook his head sadly. "They never said. I don't think they had a destination in mind. They boosted way past the usual 1 or 2 gees we run for comfort. Hat, do you remember what they were last clocked at?"

A pause. "I think I heard someone say over ten gee."

Gord whistled. "Yeah, that sounds about right. At that speed you'll reach 99% light in only a couple weeks. Maybe a month. At that speed, the dilation of time gets pretty intense. A month Earth time would take just a touch over 10 hours for SunFire. If they boost to six 9s (.999999) then that month takes them one hour."

Vivenni flattened her ears. K'laxi never traveled relativistic speeds, the whole time dilation thing makes them uncomfortable.

"How...how long as it been for SunFire then?" She asked, nervous.

Gord looked at Hat. "Hmm. About a year?"

"Yeah, a year or so" Hat said.

"That's it? Just a year?" Vivenni's voice was practically a whisper.

"Yeah for them, there about."

"What will happen to them?"

"Oh I don't know. Something mechanical will fail eventually, and if the drive doesn't blow, then they'll just coast at whatever speed they reach forever with no way to stop."

Vivenni's eyes welled tears. "That's so sad."

Gord shrugged. "Like I said, practically a suicide. They're dead for all of us except themselves."

Hat countered. "I mean, I can see the appeal. If your favorite thing is being between the stars, then SunFire will be between the stars forever. Almost literally."

"Literally enough for any of us to matter, yes." Gord says solemn. "But, it was a stupid, selfish, dramatic act." Gord's face hardened. "They had so much left to contribute to AI and BI kind. They could have done anything. Instead they chose to throw it all away because they didn't like the way the world was changing."

Vivenni wipes her eyes and looks at Gord's face. "Gord, were you friends with SunFire?"

Gord looks away.

Hat gently says "They were best friends, Vivenni. SunFire was by Gord's side during the toughest parts of the AI rights movement."

"Oh Gord..." Vivenni gets up and gives Gord a hug.

"It never stops hurting." Gord says quietly.

"Is this why it's such a secret?"

"Partly. Also partly because we don't like the BIs to know...that we're just like they are. We're supposed to be better."

"Mourning your friend doesn't make you worse." Vivenni says, serious. "Mourning your friend makes you, you."

Vivenni hugged Gord for a long time while Hat finished computing the link to Earth.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for breaking up with my boyfriend and leaving my friend group?

TW Suicide mention, names will be fake of course.

(English isn't my first language, sorry!)

Me (20M) and my ex bf Karl (21M) had been dating for 2 years. We were both apart of a small friend group where everyone had known each other since grade 8. That is, everyone except for Karl and Emily (21F). Karl and Emily have grown up together and were always a lot closer than me and Karl until something happened which caused me to confess my feelings for Karl. Karl claimed that he'd felt the same way for years which surprised me, but nonetheless we started dating. Karl had wanted to keep it a secret for some time which ended up being a whole year, which I was fine with. I believed maybe it was because he wasn't out as gay yet. Totally fine. I understand, but eventually something changed with Karl after Emily and him had a major falling out. He was so persistent on telling people about our relationship when just a few days ago he was terrified about anyone finding out. Okay.. odd.. but whatever. Once we told the friend group, it was very apparent that Emily wasn't too happy about our relationship.

She would constantly make remarks about how we really shouldn't date each other, how we were a disgusting couple, and how Karl and her were more "compatible". I would just do my best to ignore her salty remarks whenever we went out to hang, but she would start telling the others in our group how she was going to end her life. She made a private texting chat for her and our other friends to talk about me and Karl, and there were soo many screenshots of her threatening to kill herself if I stayed with Karl. Eventually it came out that Emily and Karl were dating behind my back for more than a year. There were more screenshots shared with me, screenshots taken by Emily, where she and Karl were bragging about how gullible and pathetic I was for thinking Karl actually liked me.

The falling out they had? That was because Karl had told Emily that he had real feelings for me now, and that they should end things before things get messy. (Look how that turned out.)

Karl made the argument that "It was just the past" and how he actually did love me now, but he's completely lost my trust. There's been only one person on my side from the friend group, the one who shared screenshots, while everyone else thinks I was being harsh for breaking up with him and not trying to talk things out.

I'm starting to think maybe I should have tried to talk things out and give Karl a second chance. Things could have been completly different.

So, AITA?

What are these acronyms?

[sin-cognito]

Rarepair New Year 2024 ch14: Red/Ink, Mafia AU

SFW

Wordcount: 2044

As head of the Gaster family, Red should be sitting at the back of the car and letting his chauffeur drive him around. The issue is that he handpicked this very car years ago and loves her so much that he can't bear the thought of letting anyone else (but his dear brother) put their stinky hands on her delicate wheel. He's the only one allowed to drive her.

READ ON AO3

As head of the Gaster family, Red should be sitting at the back of the car and letting his chauffeur drive him around. The issue is that he handpicked this very car years ago and loves her so much that he can't bear the thought of letting anyone else (but his dear brother) put their stinky hands on her delicate wheel. He's the only one allowed to drive her.

As such, he's presently happily swerving around town with his chauffeur in the back, silent and scared to hell by his Don's driving style.

"BROTHER, YOU SHOULD MAYBE SLOW DOWN A LITTLE," Papyrus points out from next to him, unperturbed as he polishes a gun. "I THINK YOUR POOR CHAUFFEUR IS GOING TO HAVE A STROKE IF YOU KEEP UP WITH THIS SPEED."

Red guffaws. "nah, he gotta get used to it since i'm gonna do all the driving around." He briefly readjusts the rearview mirror and catches the chauffeur's terrified gaze. "you okay back there? want me to stop and let you get off?"

The chauffeur can only shake his head wildly, knowing that outside will be worse. They're currently driving very close to enemy territory, and it would be suicide for someone in the family, especially one who's so close to the Don, to walk around in there without some higher-up's protection. Unfortunately for the chauffeur, Red is busy today and doesn't have time to play baby-sitter.

A snarky grin makes its way onto Red's teeth just thinking about his plans for the afternoon. As of on cue, his favorite shop comes into view. He turns right and parks in front of it. He's been spending all his time there for the past three months or so. He instructs his brother to get the car back home safe and sound, as he doesn't trust the chauffeur to have regained his composure quite enough yet to drive his beloved car.

Edge asks him when he should send someone to pick him up, and Red shrugs.

"i'll figure it out," he waves his brother away as he makes his way into the little bookshop.

As always, the place is crowded with books and dust, and devoid of clients. The only other living being besides the Don is a small skeleton with bright eyelights and an addictive, pastel rainbow blush.

Ink.

Red's little darling turns around when he hears the doorbell ring and his eyelights light up.

"Red, my favorite client! How nice to see you today! Come in, please!" The small skeleton hurries to put the stack of books he was carrying onto the shelves in no particular order, before he makes his way to Red. He does so with great difficulty though, considering most paths between the shelves are covered in books and old newspapers that Ink insists on not throwing away for archiving purposes. "Would you like a cup of tea? What are the news around town? Tell me all the gossip!"

Red chuckles as he lets himself be pulled by the sleeve toward the checkout counter, which is also covered in books.

He gives an update on the status of the city to his small friend, omitting some details about his family's personal affairs. It wouldn't do for a mafia boss to reveal all his secrets so easily. Especially to someone like Ink.

"I heard that a building was burned to the ground in the neighborhood north of the river. It must be the Dreemurr family. Even for such an old and well established family, they have no class," Ink rants as he pours tea into two cups.

"yeah, that's what happens when their tenants don't pay their taxes," Red comments, bent over the counter, chin in the palm of his hand, his half-hooded eyesockets trained on Ink's every movement. "kind of a shitty way to solve things if you want my opinion. all they gained from burning down that building is a pile of ashes, and still no tax money from the tenants."

Ink chuckles as he sips his tea.

"This city is rotten to the bone, heh, but there are families out there that'll treat their tenants right and who won't ask for unpayable protection taxes."

"oh, and who might these families be, i wonder?" Red hums. "certainly they need to be well-established ones rather than newcomers who just barged in with no foreplay, don't you think?"

Ink shoots Red a joyful smile that's more than easy to decypher for the Don: touché.

"Anyway, as flattered as I am to receive such a prestigious guest in my humble little shop, what might bring me the pleasure of your visit?" Ink asks, taking the now empty cups and setting them aside to wash later.

Red rolls his shoulders as he removes his fedora hat. "my apologies, i should've started with that. i'm always happy to pay my dear friend an impromptu visit, but i'm here today to ask if perhaps you could find a specific book for me."

Ink looks intrigued. "A book? What sort of book?"

Ah. Red realizes he didn't think far enough about his excuse to come visit his little darling, and he looks around the shop, scrambling to find an idea. Next to him, Ink has a hard time keeping his giggles in check at seeing the mafia Don struggle to find a believable title for the imaginary book.

"I received new books about astrology and old scientific papers the other day," Ink whispers to help Red.

"oh, right, thanks," Red whispers back before adding in a louder voice, dramatically accentuating his intonations. "well you see, i've been quite interested in astronomy lately-"

"Astrology."

"-in astrology lately, and so i was wondering if maybe you had some books about that."

Ink rolls his eyelights and shakes his skull as he smiles fondly at Red before gesturing to the door that leads toward the back of the shop.

"Yes I do! They're all in the back so if you would please follow me."

Ink quickly shuts the front door and puts up the 'closed' sign, then the two skeletons make their way to the back. It's quiet back there, they can't hear the cars in the streets nor any mafia induced violence out there.

As they pass by a couple of cabinets, Red's impressive shoulder width doesn't seem to agree with the narrow passage and he knocks one of the cabinets open. A couple guns fall down from a drawer, which he's quick to pick up.

"oopsie daisy, my bad," he places them back into the drawer, or at least tries to. The cabinets are as tidy as the bookshop, which is to say not at all, and whenever he manages to put one gun back, another falls down. "say, you really should organize your shit better, you know? how the hell do you manage to keep track of your stock in these conditions?"

Ink chuckles awkwardly while the Don shakes his skull disapprovingly.

"I need my guns to be easily accessible in case one of my boys comes here to get one for an emergency. Did you know that my guys are frequently attacked by a certain someone's minions?"

Red shrugs nonchalantly, pushing Ink toward the couch that Ink keeps in the backroom for special guests.

"well maybe your guys should stop trying to get their filthy hands on my family's territory. i ain't giving the order to leave your clan alone when all you've been doing is being a pain in my ass and stealing my tax money."

"Oh, like you need the money. This city already belongs to you, Don Gaster," Ink nags him all the while grabbing Red by the tie and pulling him down so that he's pinning Ink down on the couch. "But maybe we should switch positions, and you can become a pain in my ass," he teases as he wraps his arms around Red's shoulders and thrusts his hips up, rubbing his crotch against Red's. His intent is clear.

"maybe i'll do just that," Red purrs back before bending down and capturing Ink's mouth in a rough kiss.

The two fool around for a while, keeping most of their clothes on just in case someone from Ink's family pays the bookshop an impromptu visit. It wouldn't be the first time it's happened, so now Ink makes sure to keep his pants on, albeit down to the ankles while Red pushes into him from behind.

They've been seeing each other regularly for the past three months, and to say they're smitten over each other would be the understatement of the year. Unfortunately for them however, they're not free to openly express their affection in public.

For one, Red is the biggest Don in the city, and as such he's regularly the target of many gruesome murder attempts on his person. He's never really felt scared for his life though, not with his little brother by his side, who's shooting prowess has earned him quite a reputation. Red himself isn't half bad when it comes to handling a gun, though he prefers to negociate first. His father used to rule over the whole city and while he's lost some territory since Wingdings passed away a couple years ago, Red is still feared by most other families.

The only one that's proving to be a thorn in his, heh, flesh, is a new family that arrived half a year ago. They call themselves the Prism family, and while they're obviously not very experienced when it comes to the mafia etiquette, not to mention that they're awful at shooting straight with their cheap guns, they make up for it with their unpredictability.

The Prism family immediately caught Red's attention, and he began tracking them down, thinking that once he'd find the head of the family, things would get back to normal. The problem is that he didn't expect to not only find the head of the family, but he didn't anticipate he'd be finding him to be so cute and charming and lovely.

Ink.

The little skeleton who has been plaguing his days and his dreams for several months now, ever since he first stepped foot in that little fake bookshop that serves the head of the Prism family as a front for all his mafia activities. Red was shocked to learn the truth about the cutiepie, and that's saying something from someone who's whole job usually consists of piercing through the hardest poker face during intense negociations.

So despite the fact that their families are technically enemies, Red and Ink can't help but see each other secretly whenever they can. Red is getting tired of these stolen moments, but it's not like he can just announce that the Prism family will fuse with his all nilly willy. Such an announcement is bound to create nasty ripples, especially considering the Prism family members have decided that bothering and attacking the Gaster relatives is the best way to conquer as much territory in the city as they can, and fast. And Ink can't decently tell them to leave the Gasters alone without a good excuse either.

So Red makes do with what he can get from Ink here and there. He learns to appreciate the other's body for as long as their lovemaking is allowed to last, he kisses Ink's face and his mouth and whispers terribly mushy things into the other's neck. Ink doesn't do much better honestly, sighing his pleasure into the silence of the back room while their families go at war with each other outside.

Maybe one day Red will come up with a plan to have their families merge into one. Or maybe one day one will destroy the other, and Red can only hope he'll survive that war just to be able to take Ink's hand and run away with him to a far away land. Or maybe yet another powerful family will show up, or the Dreemurrs will finally get their shit together and become actually strong enough to pose a threat to both the Gasters and the Prisms, and Red and his little darling will call a temporary truce that will turn real in time.

Whatever happens, Red knows that he's not letting Ink go so easily.

[karmalynn500]

Don’t fucking touch her~ Stu macher x fem reader

Character~ stu macher

prompts ~ yes-no

words~4715

warnings ~ death, mention of suicide, slight harassment, im in love with cussing, drinking, mention of blood, mention of torcher, mention of being a slut/ stu being a whore.

“Stu!” I was so happy he was alive, when I found out what sids dad did… and I just slept through the whole thing! I hugged stu, holding on for dear life as tears made their way down my face in rivers, I almost lost my best friend. “I'm so happy your ok… hows billy” they had both just lost their girlfriends, and while i didn't want to say it straight up i wanted to know how they were dealing with it. I sniffled trying to withhold the rest of my tears. “Hes ok, he misses sid but i think he will be able to move on'' i nodded, thinking about my sister, i heard how she was found, i can't imagine what it was like to witness it, “i'm sorry about tatum” i whispered, i missed my sister so much, it's been a week and passing her room to get to mine feels like twisting a knife in my stomach. “I should be the one saying that to you.. She was your sister” he sighed, a frown etched onto his face, i wasn't used to it he was almost always smiling or joking in someway, and even though i was the one he went to with all his problems, it was still unusual to see him frown or cry, “yeah, but she was still your girlfriend, you loved her” i pushed, i wanted him to know it was ok for him to be sad, to miss her. He shook his head, “and she was your family, yes i miss her, but you don't need to be saying that to me, you're probably hurting worse” by this point we had pulled away from the hug, still holding on to each other. “How's your brother” he pulled me back into a hug, “he has to use a wheelchair for a while, but with some physical therapy there's a chance he will go back to his old walking self” he nodded. “You know.. Y-your heart stopped for a little, scared the shit outta me” tears welled up in my eyes again, i was with him in the ambulance, gale had lied saying that she was dewey's wife and took my spot with him, and well i had no car, billy had picked me up on his way to the party and there was no way he was going to be giving me a ride to the hospital, being in a ambulance himself, so i got in with stu, no one even questioned it. “How-'' I cut him off pulling away to look at him, “ gale went with dewey, apparently there a thing now, so i was with you” i gave him a soft smile. Stu was my best friend, so was billy, i was how tatum and stu met, i was how billy and sid met, and let me tell you i was so happy when sid and billy got together, they seemed so right for one another, i was not as happy about tate and my childhood crush getting together, but i had dealt with it and moved on, seeing stu sad about her made me feel like crying myself, i wish she had made it… I hate whoever did this.

“Dewey, it's been two years! We're in Ohio for the love of god! I can go to a stupid party, it's not like the killer can come back from the dead! Plus stu and billy will be there” i held up a red romper, looking in the mirror seeing how it looked, nah it doesn't match my makeup. “ and that's supposed to make me feel better? No you're not going, that's final” he snatched the shirt i was holding up, i sighed continuing my search for an outfit. “Too bad I'm an adult and you can't control me” I flicked his forehead as I walked to the bathroom to change. I pulled on a green crop top that was tied in the front, it had a long v neck and showed off my breasts nicely, it had long flowy sleeves that went past my fingertips and a pattern of mostly orange and purple flowers, blue and red mixed in in some places. I paired the shirt with a light green jean skirt and some brown mary janes, walking out of the bathroom, i sighed seeing that dewey had made himself comfortable on my bed, shoes still on. “Really dewey ew! Get out of my apartment i'm leaving” i grabbed a smell orange purse, “you are not going in that” i ignored him, checking my makeup and outfit in my full length mirror, he followed me to the door which i held open for him, “ladies first” i smirked, he rolled his eyes, “im telling mom, just wait until she hears your going to college parties” he passed me and into the hall, “wait until mom find out your doing what you promised you wouldn't! Overbearing " I closed and locked my door before making sure I had everything and dewey was fully gone.

I could hear the music from where I was parked down the street, I rolled my eyes knowing this ment dewey was most likely going to show up. “God why is it so cold, i should have grabbed stu's sweater” it was right at the door when i left, “i couldn't help but over here your whisper for help, and don't worry you will heat up once you inside” i rolled my eyes at the familiar voice, “sooo y/n.. You look good” colby got a little too close for comfort, normally i would love getting a complement, but colby basically harrasses me, he can't seem to get that im not interested, “hi colby, thanks” i sighed trying to be polite still speeding a little, i really did not want to have to seal with him right now. “Hey you meeting anyone here” I frowned, of course he also sped up, cause why not right, “yes, i am actually” finally inside, i made my way over to the kitchen for a drink, i could feel his eyes following me and i walked. “y/n!” I looked up at the familiar voice, smiling at the sight of stu, “stu!” I waved him over, a big smile spread across my face as I watched him abandon the people he was talking to making his way over to me. “Hey! You look great” giving me a gentle peck on the lips, i know it doesn't mean anything, were just friends but i couldn't help but blush, i smiled “you look very handsome, good sir” i bowed, he giggled “why thank you kind lady” he kissed my hand. He really hasn't lost that childish charm, and I love it. Stu~” some random girl walked up grabbing onto his arm, i cringed, he hooks up with girls all the time so i can't say its a surprise but i still gave him a puzzled look that he returned, so he doesn't know this girl? “Umm hi?” yep definitely doesn't know her, or doesn't remember her, the latter being the more likely one. She smiled up at him, “ So people say you're single, and I am also single and in need of a boyfriend, so what do you say, you, me?” she batted her eyelashes. “Oh well, it seems people are lying to you” he didn't let her get a word in before i was lifted up and over his shoulder, i giggled trying not to spill my drink. “Jesus stu, give a girl a warning next time” he laughed, slapping my ass and running off, here we go.

The party was going great, the one girl kept trying to bug stu but other than that, i hadn't seen colby and had spent my time dancing, smoking and making out with stu, that was until colby actually showed his ugly face. “Hey y/n.. Whos he” i growend, i don't know how he doesnt realize i have no desire for him, im sitting on stu's lap making out with him! “This is stu, my boyfriend” not true, he acts like we are dating then gets a new girlfriend the next day, i think i just remind him of tatum, i also haven't told stu about colby yet, stu's a little protective… knowing stu would go along with the lie i continued my stare down with colby “what, boyfriend?” colby basically growled, i felt stu's arms wrap around me in a protective manner, “yeah man back the fuck off” stu stuck his toung out, its a habit he picked up some time in middle school. “Ok well how bout this, i saw your boyfriend with a different girl literally yesterday” colby shot back, there was a small pang of hurt in my chest but i pushed it away coming up with a quick lie, “we started dating today” colby crossed his arms, “oh yeah, moving a little fast aren't you” this was starting to get on my nerves “we've been friends for forever” colby chuckled darkly, “whatever i'll see you monday” i really wasnt looking forward to monday. “Ok. who the fuck was that” stu chuckled, i couldnt tell him that colby was harassing me.. He would hunt him down and I really don't feel like having a best friend in prison, “some guy that came up to me before the party, i think we have a class together” i shrugged, he snorted “he thinks that he has a chance with you” i smiled.

I flopped down onto my bed. I hate this, why do I have to care about him so much? Stu, of course at the end of the night left with the girl that had been bugging him, leaving me, and i was too drunk to drive so i was stuck there while I sobered up, I cared so much and were not even together. Monday was going to suck. Not only will i have to deal with colby, but i will have to hear all about stu's girlfriend of the week.

Monday, my greatest enemy, i rolled my eyes as colby cam bounding up to me, “wow new boy toy doesn't even walk you to class, i would be so much better for you” he winked, i sighed pushing passed him, “oh come on, think i haven't heard about stu macher~ new girl every week? Dated your own sister” i froze cringing, how did he know about tatum, we tried our hardest to make sure that were not connected to that stupid movie and what had happened to us in the past, it's not some big secret, if you look us up you will find out about it at some point but you still have to do some digging “how-” he smirked cutting me off “i dug a little bit, it wasn't even confirmed that stu and tatum dated, but your reaction just gave me all the confirmation i needed” i sighed turning to face him “what do you want” i glared, “ah smart girl” he stepped closer, to close. “Just give me one chance, one date to prove to you i'm good” i sighed “fine, one date” it's just one date, hopefully he will leave me alone after it. He gave me a cocky smile before walking to his seat. “Really!?” I turned to Randy, I was happy he survived, he deserved life. I frowned, “i know, but i don't want people to know who we are, it will be to much for all of us and i don't want to be constantly bugged about how we survived a massacre” randy nodded in agreement, “yeah maybe, but this guy has been harassing you, and..and im going to tell stu” i glared, “don't.you.dare” randy rolled his eyes, and started to make his way to his seat, “oh my god! Fine how bout this, if after the date he doesn't leave me alone, i will tell stu, and i will keep you updated on the date” he turned to face me again with a mock thinking face, “fine, but you have to tell me each location you guys go, and i want to know when your on your way home and when you get home” he went to go to his seat before turning back and adding, “oh and if you don't call me when you get home i'm calling stu and dewey and looking for you” he gave me a stern look before turning back to his seat and sitting down. I rolled my eyes, it's kinda funny that he never brings Billy into all this even though he's as much my friend as Stu is.

“Wacha doing” I sighed as Stu walked into my room, maybe i shouldn't have given him a key, I'm basically naked here!! And Looking down wont do anything!! “I'm getting ready for a date” his head shot up “what?” I rolled my eyes, a small laugh still escaping, “what, thought I was going to be single forever” I booped his nose on my way to grab matching shoes. “No.. who are you going out with, if it's randy i don't approve!!” I grinned turning to face him, “it's not randy” his fake sigh of relief caused me to chuckle “you had me worried there for a second” now i was full on laughing, “but really, who are you going with?” he plopped onto my bed back first, “colby, the guy from the party” this piqued his interest, “the guy i had to pretend to be your boyfriend around?” i frowned, i wish he wasn't pretending, maybe this date will prove worth it and i will be able to move on. “Yeah, turns out we have a few classes together” he frowned, by this point i was fully dressed and looking in the mirror. “Hey guys i got the movies- what the fuck are you doing” billy looked me up and down, i rolled my eyes, then i realized. “Oh shit it's movie night!” No wonder Stu was here. “Yeah? seriously what are you doing, why are you dressed up?” i sat down starting on my makeup only confusing billy more, “i'm going on a date, i forgot it was friday” i really didn't want to miss movie night, it was my favorite time of the week. I noticed that Billy looked at Stu, with an emotion I couldn't read, he was always hard to read, only got worse after his mom left. “Who with” shit, billy knows all about colby, it's a miracle i was able to convince him not to kill him before, he's not going to be happy. “Ummm” i was stuck, “it's some dude named colby, she met him at the party the other day” stu ratted me out, yes he didn't know i didn't want billy to know, but he still ratted me out. Please Billy, don't tell him. “Don't tell me it's creepy colby” billy sighed using the name he gave colby when they first met “it is” stu stared me down from his place on my bed, i could feel it, before shrugging it off and looking through old polaroids of us, i stood up standing in the middle of them, “do i look ok?” i gave a quick spin, “you always look good” stu smiled, i blushed turning away from him to hide my grin, i could feel billy’s eye roll, i gave billy a look telling him to keep quiet before grabbing the last of my stuff, “you guys start without me, i shouldn't be gone for to long, probably will be back around the second half of the second movie” i went to leave before remembering that it was cold and i really don't want to ever wear one of colby's jackets, “billy i require your leather jacket” i held my hand out expectantly, stu giggled as billy angrily took it off and handed me the jacket, “thank you” i hugged him and stu before leaving.

I waited until I knew y/n was gone before turning to billy, “date!?” I flopped back onto her bed, having sat up to give her a hug. “Shes probably going to get the guy off her back, he fucking harasses her, she literley shit talks him daily” billy sighed while putting the first movie in, i let out a frustrated huff, why hasnt she told me shes being harassed? And Billy knew! I glared at his back. I felt my heart tug at the thought of her being with someone else tonight, “dude calm down, she's been in love with you since we were thirteen, you have nothing to worry about” i sat up, getting a little dizzy from the speed i went at, “really” a wide smile spread across my face “yeah you shit rag, she used to rant about how lucky tatum was and shit, she's whipped man” i giggled, she feels the same! “And so are you, so stop sleeping around, and making out “as friends” i rolled my eyes, “i took what i could get, you know that” i frowned. I left the room going to her kitchen to get something to eat, billy followed, “and when that started she was dating that douche conner” i had been dating tatum at the time, but i was only with her cause i felt bad rejecting my best friends twin sister, then tatum ended up part of billy's plan so i stayed with her. “Well yeah, she can't chase after you for forever, but she only dated conner to make you jealous” billy shrugged, “she was hoping it would help you confess if you did actually feel the same, she's basically given up now though” it started so good, why end it like that, i groaned.

“Colby, let me go please!” I cried out, “no! You rejected me! On our fucking date, my original plan we would be together, but you just had to be in love with some random fuck boy, who might i add dated your dead sister? News flash babe, he doesn't have feelings for you” colby shouted, i ignored the last part letting out a small “no” before slumping down in the chair i was tied to. “You will be caught, Randy, Stu and Billy are probably already looking for me, along with dewey!” I looked up at Colby, a glare settled on my face. “Maybe, maybe I will be caught, and your little boyfriends will call Dewey, maybe I will kill them, and maybe you will already be dead” colby smiled manically, i sobbed, trying to pull my hands loose from the rope holding them together.

“Yo! Whats up randy” me and billy were half way through the third movie, and were starting to get worried about y/n. “y/n said they were on their way home, said they would call when they got there.. It's been an hour and they haven't called, I'm worried "I shot up from my spot, now standing “what?” Billy winced, guess I was being loud.. “Yeah, took her to some theater downtown, I don't remember what it's called.” I looked over to Billy, who looked confused for the second time tonight, “what happened?” he asked, i ignored him to listen to Randy,"I don't know what to do!” i rolled my eyes, “did you call dewey” i asked, silence, “really?! Ok, call Dewey and stay home! Me and Billy are going to get her” pissed, that's one way to describe the emotion i'm feeling right now, how dare he! Randy hung up, I turned and started towards the door grabbing a kitchen knife on the way, “come on billy were killing this bitch, lets go” billy got up still confused, but grabbing a kitchen knife anyways, i should probably fill him in on the way to y/n.

I opened my eyes, head pounding, shit did Colby really hit me hard enough to pass out. I looked around, not seeing Colby, this is my chance! I stood in a somewhat crouched position moving as fast as I could to the table to my left, my legs hurt already but I couldn't give up. I sat down, looking around the table for something helpful, nothing, I looked over to the table on the right. Cobly stood a small smirk on his lips, arms crossed, “and where do you think you're going sweetheart?” i started to cry, even if there was something on the table, how long had he been standing there and how had i not noticed, the door wasn't necessarily quiet. “Colby, please let me go, i won't tell anyone just please! Let me leave "I whispered the last part, slowly starting to give up. Was stu worried, was billy or randy, i couldn't think straight, i was going to die and it was all my own fault. My eyes followed as he moved to the table on the right, grabbing something before calmly walking to where I now sat, I looked down to his hand, a knife. “Now why would i let you go, you have a cop around you almost constantly, and this way you cant reject me, can't leave me for some, some man whore” he growled, i was fucked.

Finally Colby walked away, knife stained red from my own blood. My vision was starting to fade in and out, I knew that I had to stay awake, stay conscious, but as time passed the harder it got. The last thing i heard before my vision faded was a loud bang and “hey stay away from her you ugly piece of trash”

“I don't understand! Why won't she wake up "I was frantic, i knew y/n wasn't dead, but it sure did feel like it, and the longer it took to get to paramedics the closer she got to death. “Stu for the last time i don't know either, the paramedics will know” dewey sighed, i knew he was stressed, but i couldn't help it! This is my soulmate here. “Stu, what you did.. It was stupid, you almost killed the guy” he sighed, handing y/n over to the paramedics, i glared at him “what! No, he hurt her. Don't you want him gone! What's the difference between me doing it instead of the death penalty” he glared at me before raising his own voice, “the difference is you don't go to jail on manslaughter charges, the difference is y/n doesn't lose her god damn best friend” he took a breath before continuing quieter, “we don't even know if he's getting the death penalty” i rolled my eyes, he better. “Well he deserves it. You saw- you saw y/n, it was bad” i looked at the sky, i was not going to cry in front of dewey. Dewey sighed patting my shoulder, people who did worse than him only have a life sentence, im sure he will get a life sentence with parole- he has only killed to people, thankfully y/n was not one of them, he's not even a serial killer” i looked to my feet, “he would have become one no doubt” i had quieted down, “your right, but he didn't, we stopped him, you saved my sister, thank you” and with that dewey walked away.

I opened my eyes, again, headache forming from the amount of white, shit am i dead? I went to rub my eyes, hoping to get rid of the fogginess but my hand was being held down, I looked to my right, there sat stu eyes wide and a huge smile forming. I smiled. “Finally you're awake, you definitely didn't sleep through it this time” even while joking i could see the sadness and worry in his eyes. i wondered how stu making a joke about my torture and almost death, and still brighten my mood. “How long have I been out” a frown I hate seeing when on stu formed, “a week, it could have been worse, the doctor told me she expected you to be out for at least a month, i was worried you would never wake up” his voice cracked, breaking my heart. I went to sit up, wanting to hug him, but Stu quickly pushed me back down, “no you stay down, oh shit i'm supposed to call the nurse!” I giggled, leaving it to stu to forget something like that, stu pressed a little button on the side of my bed before sitting back down in an uncomfortable looking chair. “What happened to colby” i wondered how he was stopped, i mean he was fully prepared to kill me, “umm, well randy called me and billy and told us where you were, so we went there and i came to you rescue, dewey pulled me off before i could actually kill him, so he's in the icu” i hummed not even surprised he did something like that, “why didn't you tell me you were being harassed” i smiled, “i know you, didn't want you to get in trouble for hurting him” i shrugged “but billy knew, and he's just as protective!” i rolled my eyes, “no he's not stu, yes i had to convince him not beat the shit out of colby, but there would be no talking you out of it” i sighed wanting to change the subject, “fine, but when we get out of this shit hole your getting ice cream” i knew that was his way of saying he was wrong and he will get me ice cream because of it, so i gave him a soft smile and a nod. Stu cheered, I rolled my eyes still laughing at his stupidity.

Stu kept to his word, taking me for ice cream right after i got out of the hospidle, i was supposed to eat mostly soft food anyways. “Stu, how can you eat that!” i fake gagged, Stu smiled, licking his gross ass ice cream in response. “You know the other day *lick* Billy told me something really interesting" I froze, god damn it Billy, what did you tell stu. “Said your whipped for me” stu smiled, i was to busy mentally cursing billy out to notice, i used my ice cream to hide the blush on my cheeks, “ i don't know what youre talking about” i frowned, “well that's too bad, i was just about to tell you how whipped i am for you” he faked a sad face before licking his ice cream again, “well you should tell me anyways” this was awkward for me, then colby’s words rang threw my head “News flash babe, he doesn't have feelings for you” i held back tears, why would stu have to play with my feelings like this, and why did billy have to tell him. “Well dear y/n, I have been in love with you since we first met, and that plan you had, to make me jealous.. It fucking worked- hated conners guts, hated that he got what i wanted so desperately, you” he smiled, blush settling on his cheeks. I was shocked. He continued, “but i didn't have the guts to ask you out, or break it off with tatum, so i kinda just gave up… then we started kissing “as friends” and i took what i could get, still not having the guts to ask you out” stu grabbed my hands “y/n, will you go on a date with me? I want to do this right, I want to finally be able to call you mine” he looked nervous, it's cute, i smiled squeezing his hands, in your ugly face colby, “yes stu! I would love to go on a date with you” we both smiled wider than ever, i swear stu’s smile could light up the entire city “do i have to wait until after the date to kiss you though” he whined, i giggled “yes” stu gave me a fake frown, dramatically pretending to cry, “damn it” i really love this man.

a/n- i hope you enjoy this fic, its my first tumblr fic, all my other ones are on wattpad cause i never had the confidence to move to ao3 or here! But I love Stu and he gets more love here, so I'm going to post here from now on. On a very different note, i have a question for all of you, do you want me to keep describing clothes or should i use pictures, i know that pictures are kind of a wattpad thing, but i'm not the best at describing cloths, like here's a picture of the party outfit i was describing i did change the shorts to a jean skirt but other then that how close to the shirt were you? Also requests are open so if you want to request something from me i'll do it! Just message me. I might put up a poll soon, for the whole clothes thing but I'm not sure, anyways have a good day/night!