#“oh you mean so much to me ”

[mipexch]

I WAS MADE FOR YOU // YOU WERE MADE FOR ME

[keferon]

Did you think I was done? Ahahahaha no, I have more.

Because chapter 70 of MOMU gave me the very dynamic between them that I missed so much, I just blacked out and started drawing uncontrollably lmao

Also. ALSO. I noticed a while ago that Prowl has the habit of..like…constantly frowning. So. I did a bit of research and made this graph.

In 70 chapters, Prowl frowns rougly 104 times. And the intensity of this gesture is very clearly correlated with the development of his relationship with Jazz, as you can see ahahahahah It might be wrong tho don’t take me seriously I’m not good with graphs

[kelin-is-writing]

The butterflies in my stomach going CRRRAZZY over him…

[vaguely-concerned]

sometimes I think of all the on-the-surface warm, well-meaning but deeply ineffectual advice and attention john gives harrow through harrow the ninth (make some soup and get some sleep! get a hobby! don't be so hard on yourself! self care harrow! as long as I need take no actual responsibility in this relationship whatsoever I would have loved to be your dad!) set up against the stark truth that with his other hand he has been staging her attempted horrific murder again and again and again like a living nightmare on the logic that it will 'put her down or fix her'. and then I find that I wish there is a hell. a special hell where twitch streamers turned necromantic death emperors go

[mblue-art]

someone is having thoughts (he's trying sooo hard to be nonchalant and chill)

[egophiliac]

(breathing into a paper bag) FRALIO....

can't believe they gave us another guy. oh my god. so I guess Kelka is more, uhhh, more OOO then, and Fralio is Ankh? not that it matters too much, although they do seem to be doing something with the connected Riders so. who knows. anything goes! or if I may, anything gOOOes! god. of course they're the Ambition parallel. of course they are. oh my god.

fortunately there's nothing else they can throw at me right now that could possibly --

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

[jackklinemybeloved]

can we please talk about the nemesis ward. can we PLEASEEEE talk about the nemesis ward as the perfect metaphor for adaine and aelywyn’s relationship

[teaboot]

if ur a murderbot nerd now do u have any fun opinions abt it yet?

Oh my goddd you have no idea

I really, really, really like Murderbot because it comes at life with this perspective we don't often see that is very real among people who have already been through traumatic experiences, who developed skills and abilities to suvive that were once useful but no longer have context- that search that traumatized people go through to recalibrate and reorient ourselves in a world where we no longer really need those things to survive.

A bit personal here, but my own issues personally involved a lot of psychological abuse that made it difficult to trust my own perceptions of reality, and as a result I found I was very easy to lie to and manipulate.

To handle this, I became obsessive over writing things down, cataloging details and making notes of things as they happened- I'd carry recording devices and make audio recordings and stay up late at night to transcribe what they'd picked up, read those over and over again to reassure myself of things I wasn't certain about.

While doing this, there were others close to me that I felt responsible for, who I had to protect from others and protect myself from at the same time. Life was about two things: Evidence, and defusing threats

Over time, I learned to trust myself as my memories matched what had been recorded where their narrative didn't, but I never really kicked the habit. Like Murderbot, I had added something to my own programming that reassured me I was safe, that I was in control of myself, that I couldn't be mistaken or crazy or broken or used.

I'm only on book two, but already I see myself in Murderbot again. No spoilers here, but when I left home- left that dangerous context- I didn't need to repeat these patterns to survive anymore, but I still did, because I didn't know anything else anymore. It felt safe, comfortable, knowing knowing that the past couldn't repeat itself, because I'd written that flaw- blind trust in myself-  out of my programming and replaced it with something else.

Still, though, I'd become something specially suited to thrive in a very specific environment. Nothing else felt right like followinghigh-risk situations, like witnessing and watching and recording and knowing I had proof of the truth where others might not.

People took notice. I wound up in security by accident, but's an environment that I thrive in due to the same patterns and behaviours I originally developed when I had no other choice. I climbed the ladder pretty quickly, once supervisors caught on that my reports were the most accurate, most objective, most factual, detail-oriented and timely. I keep others and myself safe and prioritize public safety above all else, and I perform well under pressure

Now I'm in a position where I often wonder, do I enjoy this job, or is it just what I'm good at? I have a set of skills now, but do I have the option of choosing not to use them? What would I be, if not this? Could I be anything else? Can Murderbot be anything else?

It has a set of skills that set it apart, make it different, special. It does what it knows best. But is it free? Does it want to be? What does it want? Does it have to do what it was built to do? What if it didn't?

I know what I'm good for. The idea of deliberately leaving what I'm good for for something uncertain, that I might hate, that I might be useless at- the choice to give up what was so important to me for so long and become deliberately obsolete?

Let go of my entire purpose? The only thing I know, that I fit so well into but don't actually know if I enjoy? Now that I can choose? Now that enjoyment is a luxury I can afford to consider?

Yeah, that resonates.

I like the Murderbot series so far because it feels the way I feel: Like the most significant and formative part of my story, the part where I became what I am, has already happened

And now I have to just. Keep going

Into... what?

It feels absurd. Like a microwave giving up on reheating food and deciding to start a life around abstract dance.

So, uh. Yeah. It's really very wild to see this same philosophical-ish dilemma I've been digging over in the back of my mind and in therapy for the last forever laid out so plainly in a genuinely exciting and enjoyable story like this. I feel much less alone, and I... kind of really need to see how it resolves, I think.

So, uh. Yeah. Read Murderbot, I guess

[trash-and-trash-accessories]

Constantly citing this article and the studies it uses.

Here's a quote:

"That study shows that transmasculine individuals were actually more likely to be victims of childhood sexual assault, adult sexual assault, dating violence, domestic violence, and stalking than were transfeminine individuals (as shown in the chart below).

The only category in which trans women were more likely to be victimized was by hate violence, and even there the difference was small: 30 percent of trans women reported having experienced hate violence, compared to 29 percent of trans men."

[hansoeii]

A lovely friend of mine got my 10th Doctor illustration signed by David Tennant yesterday and also gave him a little gift I prepared! ✨️ She managed to record what he said, and I have listened to it nonstop since she sent it to me, haha. He's been my favourite person and actor for over a decade, and the fact that he's seen my art and likes it means the world to me!

The gift included most of my good omens prints, bookmarks, stickers and a personal letter. I hope he got the chance to look through them!

You can listen to what he said here:

[notbloominhf]

c!Joel in the first episode somehow acting more awkward than normal and unlike the last few seasons his partner doesn't leave him once, despite his bad jokes and clumsiness and complete lack of social awareness Gem stays and talks back and she does not leave and has he ever experienced that before? Permanence? Company? A friendship not built on bribes or desperation but genuine kindness

[tubbytarchia]

For the ranchers a bit more shleep i just really like charakters comfy and nice:Dc /nf

Eepies. Jimmy woke up to really sore wings but its okay because Tango

[imminent-danger-came]

2x02 // 3x01 // 3x03 // 3x13 // 4x12

Team huddle!

[arthursfuckinghat]

Sometimes I think a lot about Arthur's old journal, the one he had prior to the game's events that got burned in a fire, and how Arthur went a long time without a replacement.

He wrote that he missed writing and drawing, more than he thought he would.

The journal is a wonderful tool that allows us see through Arthur's eyes and how he deals with things, it's one of his healthiest coping mechanisms, so it makes me wonder what those journal-less months were really like for Arthur.

Whatever and wherever the fire was, the time spent up north in the Grizzlies and travelling down from it, Dutch nearly buying some land but getting spooked by the law, new people joining them, and then the gang spending months in the wilderness before moving to Blackwater - it all sounded like a hectic time. But he never wrote about how he felt, he just wrote about what had happened.

Yet, he said he missed writing and drawing. He missed it. He had the itch to write and draw for ages, but he couldn't.

Maybe he struggled with the chaos of those few months without a journal to empty his frustrations and thoughts into, maybe he saw so many things he wanted to draw and it aggravated him that he couldn't, maybe he was slightly more irritable than usual with everything that had pent up and having no means to release it, and so on.

I just think about it a lot.

Especially if you took the journal out of the main game, you'd be taking out a huge portion of the story and the insights we have into who Arthur is as a person too. It's impossible for Arthur to not write in the journal, even if you never open it. It's a vital tool that helps define him and show us how he moves through the world, how he copes with the world.

So if Arthur had his journal taken away by a fire all those months ago and went a long time without, what would he have been like?

[knifearo]

i hate the concept of platonic and romantic as a binary i hate the concept of platonic and romantic as a sliding scale of "less" to "more" i hate the concept of platonic and romantic as the only two options i hate the concept of platonic and romantic as significantly different things i hate the concept of platonic and romantic as all encompassing i hate the concept of platonic and romantic as the two halves of a shallow concept of love that doesn't actually encompass anything at all i think we need to overhaul every popular conception about "types" of love so we can talk about things that are real and true for once

[luminique]

hear me out: lighter with a reader who's sick, tired and dehydrated 24/7 with very deep eyebags. he's effortlessly doing pushups while you sit on him but you can jog for 5 secs without becoming a panting mess.

imagine him u up like a bunch of grapes and manhandling u

oh that is so me. he has shown in game that he would tease you a little for it (he laughed at our poor attempt of pull ups) but i don’t think he’d be mean about it. if you really wanted to, he’d help you get started so that it isn’t intimidating but he wouldn’t force you to do it. he would DEFINITELY try to help you live a healthier lifestyle in other ways like cuddles to sleep earlier, getting drinks together, etc.

i think something that’s fun to think about is actually helping lighter when he’s practicing/exercising. he feels a lot more motivated when you’re around but he doesn’t want you to just watch him. if it’s an actual fight, sure he doesn’t mind, but this is precious time that could be spent together.

so now he has you keeping his feet down while he does sit ups. it doesn’t ask much from you and he gets to see your face, unlike sitting on him when he does push ups. it’s like a reward in a sense, your voice counting each rep and your smile that just pushes him to do more every time. he doesn’t know if he’s feeling weak from the exercise or from your presence, as he’s beginning to slow down.

you observe that he’s getting tired, sweat running down his face. he doesn’t wear his shades when he’s practicing, they just get in the way sometimes, so you can see the focus in his eyes disappearing. “6, 7, 8,” you continue counting for him, keeping a mental note of how many reps he has done until now. just before he finishes, you decide to give a little boost of motivation to him. he gets ready to sit up, taking his time to ensure he does it safely. right as he sits up, you place a little kiss on his nose and he doesn’t register that for a moment. his body was ready to lie back down but then it stops half way and then it clicks in his head. a smirk on his face before lying back down, his heart rate increasing from both the exercise and you.

also i do think that he can easily manhandle you. his hands on your waist and you’re up in the air, placing you on the nearest surface. but if there’s anything that you’ve shown clear discomfort to, he would never do. i don’t think he’d slam you into a wall or anything like that, but instead would pin you to a wall slowly mhm