#“i wonder why im so unhappy being someones boyfriend :(”

[reverentwormpriest]

a category 3 yuricane has hit the area

[im-out-of-it]

season 1, episode 13 part 2

24. here is the video I promised

25. I love Alec not having it 🔥 he’s such a fucking mood

26. “she saved me.”- alec. I know I made a thing about how Lydia stepped aside and it was the right thing to do but like what could she have done? you can’t force someone to marry you against your will(I mean you could attempt it) but also Lydia did such a noble thing. I’m half on it shouldn’t be made such a big deal of and the other half of what else was we supposed to do? but if Alec did nothing when he saw Magnus, he would’ve signed on for a life of unhappiness

27. imagine if Alec did marry Lydia. he would be super unhappy and maybe take a lover by the side. there is not a chance (my opinion) that anything good could come out of the marriage. and if you marry someone for nonpersonal reasons, that’s okay too. but it should be consensual and an agreement needs to be made of what is to happen and why it’s necessary. and after Lydia lost someone, she probably wouldn’t have been happy either. it’s just two people being miserable together

28. okay so awkward when I posted those gifs about time in on your side, the immortal discussion, and Magnus being supportive- that actually happens in this episode so my bad 😭

29. but it’s okay! I’ll repost it again

30. Magnus: I can be supportive I got this supportive boyfriend here I come

31. Alec: but I don’t have eternity like you do babe

32. Alec is like they’ll never forgive me 😭 give it a few more weeks alec and all will be right again

33. Magnus: omg babe is sad for real, what can I say???????? fuck I haven’t done this in centuries, was it this hard last time?

34. Magnus a second later: FUCK WHAT IS HE REGRETS ME

35. no but for real, can we just think about that Alec never expects Magnus to be there or that he was going to kiss Magnus? all he knew was that he saw Magnus and he couldn’t breathe and next thing, he’s grabbing Magnus by the lapels and kissing him. like he didn’t know how Maryse would react or anyone or if he would lose anything by finally doing skemjrknv good for himself. to be fair, alec hasn’t really had a second to himself

36. Alec: I wasn’t expecting a boyfriend today I’m sorry

37. and I love how Alec is like I want to make sure Lydia is okay. the fact that Magnus and Alec want to ensure Lydia is safe and content after everything shows how wonderful they are

38. but I’m sorry can we not say what she did was heroic when it seems like the sensible thing to do????? maybe I’m the one with the problem here lmao

39. why is it “we owe her” when I basically just a human right????? IM SORRY IT MAKES ME UNCOMFY

40. and once again Malec keeps getting interrupted but to be fair, Lydia is actually injured so I’ll accept it this once

(41 or else I’ll forget) part three coming soon

[tizzyizzy]

When Izzy Enthusiasts argue with Izzy Misunderstanders, I can almost see the IMs shaking their heads in disbelief. How, they wonder, can IEs refuse to see what is in front of their faces?

What Izzy Misunderstanders don't understand is that the vast majority of Izzy Enthusiasts know Izzy is a dick.

We disagree on two points.

Izzy's level of dickishness relative to other characters in the show and the specific ways in which he is a dick.

For example, an IM might come out of ep4 thinking Ed is charming and fun, while Izzy is a mean jerk who is always yelling at people. Said IM might say Izzy is a worse person than Ed, morally speaking. But doing that means ignoring that...

Ed ordered this attack which benefited none of the crew, only himself. Three men died for a whim.

Despite being friendly with the crew, Ed was down for murdering them just like Izzy.

Ed intentionally keeps information from Izzy, a crew member, causing him emotional distress and preventing Ed's mistake from being caught.

Izzy is the one who brings up the dead men as a point of concern.

Izzy ends up doing extra work, whether that's asking for a plan or managing the crew, because Ed is with Bonnet.

Now, does Izzy act like an asshole in general in the episode? Absolutely. But so does Ed, and a real argument can be made that Ed's recklessness and lack of care had much greater consequences than Izzy's yelling.

Then there is the matter of the ways Izzy is a dick. IMs see Izzy yelling and causing problems and say, "This is because he wants to hurt others for no reason."

But effect and motivation are not the same. Izzy almost always has some greater goal in mind when he behaves badly, sometimes even a positive one. There's a difference between yelling at people to do stuff because you're a pirate and first mate and this is your job, and doing so because you want to hurt someone's feelings. There's a difference between killing your captain's boyfriend because you're afraid he's being seduced into a relationship that will ultimately hurt and weaken him and doing so because you just want him to be unhappy.

"But," IMs say, "the consequences are the same!"

Yeah? No one said Izzy wasn't an asshole who never does shitty things, at least not unironically. And let's not pretend that this argument isn't applied selectively. Many IMs who condemn Izzy will give every justification imaginable for why circumstances made their blorbo's bad choice forgiveable.

[adhdrexic]

9/15/23

Diary post

I read something on reddit this morning that said you usually binge eat because you are under-nourishing yourself in another part of your life.

I believe this to be true.

Heres the thing:

my binges have a 100% linear correlation with my relationship. The first time I broke up with my boyfriend I lost 5 pounds.

But, heres the other thing:

is it because im unhappy with him, or because he has made me abandon my dopamine seeking behaviors like my drug use? would i be doing better if I could just do drugs like i used to? or engage in my hobbies like i used to? and then it circles back; can i do those things with him around?

ive been having some relationship issues recently. my boyfriends friend moved in with us recently. its been 3 days, and i come home to "your man child, i mean boyfriend, didnt do shit but play the game and complain all day. i did literally everything" followed by me crying because someone finally understands my struggle to balance every other aspect of my life AND having to do EVERYTHING around the house because my boyfriend is fucking lazy.

my boyfriends friend is beginning to not like my boyfriend anymore.

my mom is beginning to listen to me and his friend about him being a lazy sack of fucking hammers.

this complicates the situation.

this makes me wonder if the boyfriend really is the problem.

i woke up today, and the last 3 days, and the first thing i heard was him either yelling at me or complaining about something.

i do not let this effect me. i am used to it. hes moody. its whatever.

i had a dream last night that i found a dead body.

decaying. blue. swollen. maggots crawling out of the eyes and mouth and various other places.

i wanted to get rid of it. my boyfriend yelled at me and started bringing it into the house, insisting that we need to hide it.

i had a breakdown about this (in the dream). i cried and begged and insisted we get rid of it.

boyfriends friend comes and asks why hes bringing a body into the house and why we dont get rid of it.

i woke up.

i dont even want to get into the symbolism of that dream. but the core of it is that there is something in my life that is rotting, that i need to get rid of, that everyone else refuses to acknowledge as what it is, except my boyfriends friend.

sometimes i think i would be better off without him. in fact i have evidence of this claim. i just feel so bad for hurting him by leaving him again. and now if i leave him, his friend leaves too, and his friend has been helping me a lot.

this isnt even about bingeing anymore.

what i will say, is... i am not satisfied with my life.

and food is the only thing that makes me happy anymore

it also makes me want to kill myself.

i might temporarily relapse into my bulimic habits just so i have a comfort and dont spend all my time wanting to kill myself.

im gonna ask my doc for adderall. im hoping itll give me enough energy and dopamine to stop caring so much about food. it sure used to.

everything will work out eventually. i keep my hopes up.

[kaashikuroo]

oooooh i was wondering if you could do the break up prank on atsumu and tendou like an angst to fluff type beat cause im addicted to it apparently haha have a good day!!

Of course! Thank you and same to you.

Pranks you pull on them -Haikyuu hcs

Characters: Atsumu and Tendō.

Genre: Angst to fluff.

Warnings: Mentions of breakup, tears.

Part 1: Kenma and Kuroo

MASTERLIST

Requests? Send ‘em here!

Atsumu:

Atsumu always had a soft spot for you.

He’d never raise his voice at you. When you had arguments, he’d take care of the situation quickly ‘cuz he doesn’t like fighting with you.

So you like the biggest douche on the planet when you sent a text to him, asking him if you could come over to his place cuz you wanted to make a dramatic exit to talk about something important.

You knew you made him anxious by yiour vague text, but what could you do? One of your friends not rlly dared you to do the break up prank on him or they’ll deem you unworthy of being their friend. Like srsly that’s your sign to leave 😃❓

So here you were, in his living room as he took a seat on the couch. When he saw that you were still standing, he got confused.

“Y/n~ Take a seat, babe. You hate standing.”

You couldn’t do this to him 🥺

But on the other hand, you also wanted to see how he’d react.

“It’s kind of urgent, Miya-san.”

His ears perked up as he stood up with a confused, but serious expression. Shit got real when you addressed him formally.

“What’s wrong, babe?” He stood up infront of you, trying to look stern but to you he looked like a lost puppy.

“I want to break up with you.”

——

Atsumu felt his entire world stop as you said those words.

He looked so confused as he tried to recall all the moments you two spent together, trying to find out if you were unhappy with him all this while.

“You what…?” His stern facade compeletly faded as his voice cracked.

“Wh-Where did it all go wrong? I’ll fix it baby. I’ll fix everything. I’ll change for you. Please don’t leave me. Just p-please don’t leave.” His voice was cracking all over the place as his eyes filled up with tears.

His mind was racing to all your happy moments.

He couldn’t lose you. You were the one who kept him together. You were the reason he was so happy with his life. He couldn’t handle the heartache of just imagining you leave.

It hurt you to see him so vulnerable.

But your last straw was when he knelt on the ground and buried his face in your stomach, sobs wrecking his throat.

You couldn’t bear it anymore.

The last thing you wanted to do was make him cry.

“‘Tsumu…” You tried to make him look at you as you touched his arms to make him stand up.

But he just shrugged you off.

“No! I won’t let you leave! Please give me a reason! Plea-se..” He was sobbing uncontrollably.

“‘Tsumu. I’m not leaving you, baby.” You said, raking his hair.

“H-huh?” He’d raise his head, looking at you with a confused, tear-stricken face.

You successfully pulled him up this time.

“It was just a prank. My stupid friends made me do it.” You said, wrapping your arms around his figure.

“Y-ya i-idiot!” He hugged you even tighter as you tried to soothe him by rubbing his back.

“Ya had me s-so worried. Y-you’re evil!”

You chuckled.

“I won’t leave you TsumTsum. I love you too much.” You pecked his shoulder as tears made their way down your face at the feeling of guilt from making him cry.

idk ‘bout y’all but i automatically get tears in my eyes when i see someone crying 😃❓

“Why are ya cryin’ now? Huh? Do I need to prove to you that I’m the best boyfriend in the world.”

He chuckled a little as he realized you weren’t going anywhere.

“Regardless, babe, don’t ya ever leave me. A can’t live without ya.”

He pulled away and smiled at you, making you smile back at him.

You both wiped eachother’s tears.

“A love you, honey.” He kissed your forehead.

“But! Ya ain’t gettin’ off the hook so easily! Love me!”

Mans carried you to the bedroom

What are legs when you have Miya Atsumu? 🦵❓

Would make you cut off connections with your ‘friends’

Tendō:

Mans has been rejected so much in his childhood- istg- 😭❓

You got asked one day from one of your friends that “What would happen if you guys broke up?”

You were genuinely clueless- cuz- you’ve never thought of leaving him. 🧍🏻‍♀️

Would suggest you to do the break up prank on him just to see his reaction.

Strikes your interest.

You dumb hoe. 😃❓

“Tendō.” You suddenly called out to him while scrolling through your feed.

“It’s Sato to you, missy.” Would joke from the other side of the couch.

“Tendō.”

You’d defo catch his attention this time.

“I’m sorry.” Would apologize without hesitation, putting down his phone, turning his attention to you.

“I did something wrong, right?” Would look at you with soft eyes.

“No. I just need to talk to you.” You kept your voice hard.

“What’s up?” Attempts to hold your hand but you swat it away, making him frown.

“I’m frustrated with this. With us.” You’d say, rolling your eyes.

You felt like the biggest scum on the planet rlly. As you should 🤡❓

Mans would stop breathing for a second.

“You’re kidding.” He stated, looking into your eyes trying to find some sort of a hint that you were joking.

“Tendō. I’m serious. I’m done with you. I can’t stand you anymore.”

How could you be so cruel 😭😭😭❓

Mans is stunned for a minute.

Blinks before looking down.

“I’m sorry if I did something to offend you. Please let’s talk this out. Don’t walk away. Please, love.” Will refuse to look into your eyes.

You stood your ground no matter how much you wanted to embrace the living shit out of him. cuz same 😔✊

“No. I can’t stay here.”

You were a bit confused as you saw Tendō nodding a little, stepping aside, heading somewhere.

Before you could question him he started talking.

“I understand. I’ll help you pack. But please think about this with a cool mind afterwards, love.”

You caught a glimpse of his trembling lips and his tear stained face as he passed by you, heading to your shared bedroom.

You knew you had to act quick here.

You literally just shattered this man’s heart 😭😭😭

“Babe! Come back, please! It was a joke!” You exclaimed as you caught a hold of his arm in time.

You saw him wiping his tears before turning around to face you.

“Joke? I don’t understand, love.”

Pls- his eyes were so red, you teared up

You quickly explained the whole scenario to him, not wanting him to be left in that heartbroken state any longer.

“I’m sorry, Sato. I didn’t mean to hurt you this bad.” You cupped his cheeks, caressing them.

“I really love you, Sato. I’d never leave you. Please know that.”

Now Tendō was smiling.

“I know, love.” He says, embracing you.

“But don’t pull something off like that again. It really hurt.”

You nodded.

“Sato~~”

He pulled away, looking at you curiously.

“Crouch down a bit for me, please? Eyes closed!”

Looks comfused but obliges anyway.

When his face was infront of yours, you cupped his cheeks and placed a gentle kiss on top of his forehead.

“That felt really good. Do that more often.” He smiled, seeming relaxed.

Would flick your forehead.

“That’s your punishment.” Laughs a little.

“Now you have to love me all night. You know what that means?” He wiggled his eyebrows at you.

You gasped comically

“SLUMBER PARTYYYY” You’d squeal together, holding hands, jumping up and down like 5 year olds.

“I’ll get the face masks!”

“And I’ll get the snacks!”

well- 😃❓ that escalated quickly 🤡✋

[mango-bango-bby]

Heyyyyyyy I was wondering if you could do a yandere Deku x reader? I had demanded that my boyfriend choose his addiction or me and he cast me aside. It’s been three months now and he’s perfectly fine! It’s like our break up meant nothing to him! Maybe Deku has been my friend throughout the relationship and he decides to “take care of” Garrett (my stupid ex). Like we’re in the middle of making love but I just can’t seem to get past stupid Garrett so I start crying and tell Deku everything. Explaining that that’s why I’m so shy at becoming intimate.

♡ Cuddle Session ♡

(A/N: I DIDNT END UP MAKING THIS NSFW, IM SORRY!!! Recently i’ve felt like all my fics especially my smut fics have been turning out shitty. So, I’m sorry if this is bad. Idk, just been insecure about my writing lately idk, sorry, just felt like getting that out. Anyways, I hope this comforts you and Garrett didn’t deserve you bb)

Summary: Izuku comforts you about your ex. Reassuring you that he loves you and won’t leave you for anything (Yan!Deku x GN!Reader)

(⚠️ Possible hinted abuse, stockholm syndrome ⚠️)

You bring your hands up to cover your face, covering your eyes. You should be focusing on Izuku’s hands that are running up and down your hips but his name is swirling around in your mind, your ex. He haunted you practically everyday, memories of the relationships that had hurt you so much in the long run. You know that he’s no longer with you, he was far away from you after Izuku had swooped you away from your previous life, giving you a better one with him.

“Darling? Are you alright?” You open your eyes to meet Izuku’s large green ones. You lean up from the bed, wrapping your arms around him in a tight hug. You just don’t want to think about your ex, ever again. You just wish that you could forget him from your mind. You know that Izuku wishes that too. He hates seeing you think of how unhappy you were with that man.

“What’s wrong?” Izuku asks, concerned about why you’re suddenly so, seemingly, sad durning your daily cuddle session. When he first took you, he’d do these cuddle sessions everyday so you would get used to him and become comfortable with him. But, now it’s become a part of both of your daily routines. You let out a small sigh before mumbling your ex’s name.

Izuku lets out a sigh, soothingly and gently rubbing your back. He’s been with you since you had had your heartbroken by that man, supporting you and comforting you even before he had taken you. Even ‘taking care’ of that man, not that you knew exactly. He couldn’t hurt anyone, anymore. After all, Izuku was a hero, so of course he had to take care of any villains. Especially ones that hurt his darling Y/n.

“Sweetheart, I thought we talked about this” He comforts, he hates when you’re sad “You shouldn’t think about him anymore. He didn’t deserve you, he never did. He can’t hurt you ever again” Izuku whispers, letting his head fall onto your shoulder and nuzzle on you. You let out a sigh, snuggling back, holding tightly to your captor.

“You don’t have to be shy or scared anymore” Izuku mumbles “You’re here now and he’s not” You nod your head at his words. At certain points you felt it was silly to be so broken up about your last relationship but Izuku made you feel like it was important. He validated your feelings! Everyday, you worried that Izuku would up and leave you like your past partner did, but he always reassured you that you wouldn’t. He would even hug you and kiss your tears away.

“You won’t leave me for anyone or anything, like him, right?” You mumble quietly, hear a sad sigh from Izuku while you cling to him. He’s become your safe space over the past few months, even though he probably shouldn’t be.

“Of course not, pumpkin!” Izuku practically yells, his voice coated in concern and sadness for you. You wish that your ex’s words and face didn’t plague your mind. But, you have Izuku now. He may have taken you away from everything you knew. But, he loved you, he comforted you. He loved you.

“I love you more than anything, Y/n. I love more than myself, love you more than saving people and being a hero. He didn’t deserve someone as beautiful, smart, and incredible as you. You don’t need to think of someone like him, ok? You deserve so much better”

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

Thank you for reading, darling!!

[angstysebfan]

What’s Done Is Done - Part 1

Pairing: Bucky x reader

Request made by: @joannie95

--

Being an Avenger is hard work. It’s physically difficult, mentally draining, and at time... emotionally stunting. You have worked with the team for almost 3 years, and have seen the ups and downs of all your team members, yourself included. What has helped your emotional and mental state is your boyfriend, Bucky. You both make sure the other feels safe, whenever they are feeling vulnerable. You both made sure that space was given when needed, but were always there for each other.

You loved Bucky with everything you had. You never felt this way about someone else before, and were pretty sure you met the man you were going to spend the rest of your life with. Now dating for 2 years, you both lived together in an apartment in the Avengers Compound. Moving in together, after 6 months of dating, was actually an easy choice, since you both decided you slept better together. Bucky even made mention that his nightmares were starting to disappear.

One thing that Bucky was, above anything else, was clingy. Being touch starved for so long, he always immediately calmed with the slight touch from you. Your voice always soothed him when he would get nightmares, and your scent made him feel at peace. Everyone asked how you felt with him always around and on top of you, but you didn’t mind it, because you felt the same way about him. You felt like there was this magnetic pull between you and you didn’t care what anyone else thought.

One night you woke up and notice Bucky’s side of the bed was empty. You quickly get up and search for him, knowing this happens after a bad nightmare. When you find him in the kitchen, you walk over and wrap your arms around his torso, ignoring his body tensing. “Another nightmare?” you ask as you kiss the skin between his shoulder blades. Bucky pulls your hands away from him and walks to the other side of the room. You furrow your brow in confusion, because he always lets you comfort him.

“Babe? Are you ok?” you ask as you walk over to him. He looks at you and you see him trying to hide his emotions. After being together for so long, you can tell when he is hiding things. Bucky sighs and closes his eyes in frustration for a moment before looking at you again. 

“I... I think it’s time we end this,” he says. You look at him speechless, so he continues, “We both know it would have never worked out in the end. We are too different and I think it would be best to just end things now before things get worse,” he says. You furrow your brows and try to hold back the tears that are starting to blur your vision.

You clear your throat, “Um... when did they start getting bad? I... I thought we were happy?” you asks quietly, afraid that if you spoke louder, your voice would crack. “I’ve been unhappy for awhile now. But I can’t pretend to be happy in this with you anymore. So... It’s over,” he says with zero emotion. You finally let the tears fall as you look at the man that you love, who just decimated your heart.

Without saying a word you walk to the elevator and leave the room. You wanted to give him space, since that seems to help him when he is being an asshole. You decide to take a walk around the city to calm down your own emotions, thinking you both can talk when you return. You walk around the entire city, letting your thoughts pass one at a time. You thought you were both happy, when in the world did that change? You thought that he wanted to spend the rest of his days with you.

By the time the sun had come out, you returned to the tower, hoping to have a better conversation with Bucky. As you walk to your shared room you see boxes and suitcases out in the hallway. You look into the boxes and see that it is all of your stuff. Shock and anger flood your senses and you bang on the door for Bucky to let you in, but he doesn’t open the door. 

“Bucky, please! Let’s talk. I don’t understand what happened!” you screamed, but again there was no answer, which only fed your anger. “You’re a fucking coward, Barnes!” you scream. You felt someone touch your shoulder and turn around to see Nat standing there looking confused. You collapse into her arms sobbing, unaware the Bucky was sitting with his back against the bedroom door hear your sobs, while trying to keep his own quiet.

--

It’s been 2 weeks since your break up, and you are back in your old room trying to figure out what the hell happened to your life. You barely see Bucky, as he is constantly running away from where you are. You have given up trying to talk to him and have decided to ignore his existence, which makes your heart break even more, if that was even possible. 

You walk out into the common room and see the team sitting there talking about the next mission. You sit next to Sam, who automatically wraps his arm around you. He is one of your best friends, and was there to help you move into your old room, and hold you as you just cried. He ripped Bucky a new one, a long with Steve, but Bucky didn’t seem phased by it.

As you are all talking a beautiful woman walks into the room, wearing nothing but a t-shirt, one that you recognized immediately. Your breath caught in your throat as your ex walked out in just a pair of boxers and wrapped his arm around the woman. He looked directly into your eyes before turning and kissing her neck. You felt Sam squeeze your shoulder in reassurance and you forced yourself to look away from the couple.

After that day it seemed like Bucky had a different girl every night. He made sure to parade those girls in front of you every morning. You didn’t know how much more you were going to be able to take. Finally after a week of seeing him, and hearing him with other women, you spoke with Sam, Steve and Tony and told them that you were going to move out of the tower to an apartment close by. You asked them to not tell Bucky about it, because you didn’t want him to know anything involving you.

Another agonizing week later, you, with the help of the guys, moved into your own little apartment close to the tower. You felt like a weight was lifted off your shoulders, knowing that you wouldn’t have to see Bucky with other women anymore, but at the same time you cried because you wouldn’t see him either. At the end of the day, you still loved him, and you knew he loved you. You know something happened that is making him do this, but now it’s too late to fix it. Now you are alone, and there is only 1 thing to do. Move on.

--

Bucky kept having different women come by the tower, not knowing you had moved out. The team kept their word and didn’t tell him. After a few days he started to wonder why you weren’t around anymore. He figured you were hiding from him, but he hasn’t seen or heard you in days. He decided to go and walk to your room to see if you were there. He put his ear to the door and listened for any noise, but there was none. He decided to open the door and what he saw shocked the hell out of him. 

It was completely empty. Nothing by a bed and side table. Nothing of yours was around. Did you move to another part of the tower? When he walked out of the room he ran into Steve, “Hey, where is Y/N?” he asks. Steve glares at him, “Why don’t we start with what the hell happened between you 2, and then I’ll tell you where she is,” Steve said. 

Bucky rolled his eyes, “It’s none of your business, okay?” Steve stops Bucky from running away, “I just don’t get it! You were so in love with her. You asked Sam’s permission to marry her because he is like her brother. Then you dump her? Kick her out of the room? Parade multiple women in front of her? Make her move out of the tower?!” Steve yells. 

Bucky’s eyes widen, “Sh-she moved out of the tower?” he asks. “Bucky, tell me what happened. You can still fix this!” Steve begged. Bucky immediately closed up and became his emotionless self, “It doesn’t matter. What’s done is done. We weren’t right for each other,” he says before walking back down to his room. Once he closes the door he walks to his bed and pulls your pillow near him to smell your shampoo. He takes out the picture he keeps next to his side of the bed and just cries. What the hell did he do?

--

Part 2 coming soon! Hope you liked this @joannie95

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[mythicamagic]

As usual... I can never just choose one... soo here are my top choices you choose one. Lol

1. Are you flirting with me?” “You finally noticed?

2. The worst thing is, that even after all of that, I’m still in love with you.

3.that ship has sailed. i’ve had my one great love already

4. we’re just…friends.” “friends don’t do this type of shit!

5. Did you just slap my ass?” / “Actually, I firmly grasped it.” 

Why did I decide 2 of the hurt/sad/angst.. idk.. i suppose im glutton for punishment. Dont hurt me too bad if you choose to do one of them myth.

Decided to do a part two for - this ask. 

I chose;  The worst thing is, that even after all of that, I’m still in love with you.

---

The air felt crisp and clean, biting at Kagome's cheeks as she wound her scarf tighter around her neck. Winter markets were so much fun. The vast array of cute little items on display made warmth light up her chest, even as the candy and children's toys reminded her of a certain fox she'd left behind in the past.

Kagome smiled at Ayumi as she prattled on about something or other.

She shouldn't feel guilty. Shippo had barely visited the village in the last year she'd been there. Everyone had moved on. Including herself, somewhat. She'd been so wrapped up in her whirlwind romance with a certain Daiyoukai- the feudal era had been irreparably damaged as a home for her the second they'd broken up.

But she missed her friends. Dearly.

She shook herself. It was too late to go back on her choice now. The well had sealed shut for good.

Ayumi stopped to grab some hot chocolate from a street vendor, allowing Kagome a moment to warm her hands, rubbing them together.

Snowflakes gently danced about like powdered sugar, kissing Kagome's face as she turned- almost bumping face-first into a muscular chest. Fresh scents of wild forests and thunderstorms filled her nose, and she stiffened.

He smells the same.

Kagome bit the inside of her cheek, blue eyes narrowing. "Don't think I don't know what you're doing."

"Haven't the faintest idea of what you mean," he arranged his features into mild innocence, which was near impossible due to his smiling eyes.

"Riiight," she muttered, wishing Ayumi would hurry up.

Sesshoumaru gazed down at her, a pink gift bag in hand. Kagome grit her teeth, hating that she wondered who it was meant for.

"I did not intend to run into you here, before you accuse me of anything," his silky voice caressed her hearing once more. It sounded so lulling, designed to draw her back in. "Did you take my gift home with you or did you throw it away?" he asked, deceptively casually.

"Home. But don't think that means anything- it's not the plant's fault you're trying to worm your way back into my life."

The Daiyouki smiled to himself, obviously absurdly pleased. He began pursuing the street vendor's items right beside her, gazing at children's toys with a touch of gentleness in his steady gaze. Kagome was prepared to ignore him- until he leaned down, breath fanning 'accidentally' over her cheek as he picked up a doll and straightened.

"Do you remember Rin? And the other children-"

"Don't," Kagome said, unable to move away. She hated the thrumming of her skin so much. The way it cried out. Hated him.

Her skin flared alive, body humming with hunger. Like a shot of adrenalin to the heart, Kagome dipped her chin into her scarf to try and mask her escalating breathing due to his proximity. When they'd had sex- so many years ago- it hadn't been like human lovemaking.

He'd wired new pathways within her system via his youki. Sometimes she felt like it still lived inside her, having made a home for itself. They hadn't mated, but she felt irreversibly changed by it.

Kagome made a faint noise, squeezing her eyes shut.

Resist him-

"Kagome?"

Oh thank God.

"Ayumi, let's go," she said abruptly, facing her friend with an urgent look in her eyes.

Ayumi tilted her head slightly, eyeing Sesshoumaru curiously. "A-alright?"

"You do not need to leave," he turned, exuding a magnanimous air. "I am the one who intruded on your time, please continue," he gestured to the market, ensnaring Kagome's gaze with his own. Unblinking, unable to hide his more animalistic habits even after so many years.

"I hope to see you some other time when my presence does not disturb you," he said softly, walking away.

---

When entering work that Saturday, Kagome could already sense the buzz in the air. Someone had generously donated some priceless artefacts to their museum. The previously undiscovered finds that shaken everyone due to their rarity and mint condition. No one could stop talking about it.

Kagome's blood ran cold the second the items in question were described to her. Pushing through the crowd that had gathered, she stared in horror at the display case.

Itching for a fight, she immediately stormed to his office downtown, opening the door to reception and letting herself in. "Is Sesshoumaru here?" she burst, stopping in front of the secretary's desk.

"Mr Taisho?" the woman blinked, obviously thrown by the petite, angry miko currently glaring at her and using his name so informally. "Do you have an appointment?"

"No. Just tell him Kagome is here."

She was let into his office soon enough, trying to keep a lid on her crackling reiki. Sesshoumaru glanced up from his computer. "Miko? What a pleasant surprise."

Kagome slammed an article atop his desk. "What the hell is wrong with you?" she snapped.

He raised a brow, briefly flicking his attention to the contents. A photo of red and white silks, coupled with polished spiked armour sat in a display unit. "Something wrong? It was just a donation, given in good faith."

"Donated to my workplace!" Kagome seethed, groaning and burying her face in her hands. "Don't you realise I'm going to have to see your things now every day? I've worn those clothes! I've slept in them as pyjamas! Are you trying to mess with me because you want me back?"

"That's a little dramatic, dear one, I'm not trying to 'mess with you.' It was just a donation," he rose from his seat, face inches from hers. "And if I wanted to romance you, I'd go about it much differently."

"Don't 'dear one' me," she snapped. "You could've donated that stuff years ago- or to a different museum. But no, you had to give it to mine."

"My gift was not meant to distress you, but," he rounded the table slowly, fingers dragging over the wood. "It does make me worry, seeing you so worn thin. Is something else going on? Separate from...us?"

Kagome stiffened, avoiding eye contact. Things with her boyfriend had been strained as of late, and the Daiyoukai's sudden appearance back into her life wasn't helping matters.

"There is no 'us.' I'm frustrated and exhausted, that's all. Don't make things even more complicated by asking about that stuff."

Sesshoumaru lingered close, and Kagome didn't shy away. The one person she couldn't bear to be near was also the only being who could offer some semblance of comfort to her due to his familiarity.

"This one meant to give you something," reaching into his pocket, he pulled out a business card, handing it over. Kagome immediately froze, staring at the name. "You miss him," Sesshoumaru murmured. "The kit lives in Kyoto now with his wife and children. Call him."

Tears pricked her eyes, and Kagome bowed her head. Full lips crumpled into a wobbly line.

"If there is something I regret more than our parting, it is that you felt compelled to leave. The fault lies with me."

Shaking her head, a saddened laugh bubbled up her throat. "It was my decision to break up, and it was my decision to leave the Feudal Era. Don't...blame yourself for that part."

"You did not do anything wrong," a long-fingered hand reached out, blunt nails losing their glamour. Sharp claws stroked dark curling hair back from her neck. Kagome's breathing hitched. "When we were together- you did not do anything wrong. We were both so young. It was foolish of me to act as I did, but I think it is now... that we are in the right place for something more."

Kagome shivered, body warming to him. Intuitively, the brush of fingers on her neck made her foolishly anticipate a kiss- sorely disappointed when it didn't come. "I'm not," she forced herself to say. Seeing the disappointment darken his brown eyes, she sighed. "I miss you," Kagome admitted quietly, turning away to escape from his touch. "I miss how... we were. I'm terrified of that, though. I was...under the impression we'd be together. Permanently. Then you had to go and tell me you needed 'pure' heirs to continue the family bloodline."

She laughed bitterly, loosely holding her arms. "The worst thing is, that even after all of that, I'm still in love with you."

"You are frightened that I will hurt you again."

Kagome nodded mutely. She then forced a giggle, giving a weak smile. "Besides, you may not like me as I am now. I'm more jaded than before."

"I like what I see very much," moving closer once more as though experiencing a gravitational pull, he stopped inches away. "I have missed you too," he muttered quietly, genuinely. She could feel him inhale her scent through her hair. "Very much."

Her mouth suddenly became dry. "I'm with Natsuki-"

"Leave him," a rush of passion entered his voice as Sesshoumaru swept closer, backing her into the desk. The wood dug into her thighs, their hips meeting. "This one is not interested in being 'the other man' in an affair. Nor am I interested in watching you remain with someone less than ideal," he snorted, resting his hand over her wrist and grazing his thumb over it.

"Y-you don't know anything about it!"

"I could smell your scent. It was not bright and cheerful even before I re-entered your life the other day. His feels...murky on you. Unhappy."

Kagome swallowed thickly, glancing away. "Observant as ever," she admitted softly.

"Or perhaps you did a poor job of hiding it," backing off a little- he rested his hip next to hers beside the desk, remaining near but barely touching. And yet everything felt so close. "You've changed. But you're still the same at your core, miko," hot breath fanned over her neck, teeth ghosting over the shell of her ear. "If you permitted me, I would not be reckless with your heart again, as I was in my youth."

Her palms traitorously slid up, sliding over firm muscles- running across his chest. He felt warm. His heart was beating fast. Was he nervous? Such a thing sounded impossible.

She bit her lip, secretly longing for the sensation of silks under her hands again instead of the modern cotton of his shirt.

"I don't know that I believe you," Kagome met his gaze, rewarded with the golden glow of his eyes instead of human brown.

"I've gotta go," she said reluctantly, forcing herself to pull away. "I need to be at work."

"Very well," he hummed, unmoving. "But if you...need something. You know where to find me."

He sounded almost desperate for an excuse to talk with her. Giving a curt nod, she let herself out of his office with a long breath, shaking her head. Sesshoumaru's static youki haunted her steps for the remainder of the day.

[glassartpeasants]

Hello so I found out requests were open and I got super excited. Anyway can I please request a chronostasis x reader where the reader is actually in love with overhaul and just pretends to love chrono and in the end he/she breaks up with him and goes to overhaul or they find out overhauls true colors and doesn’t want to be with him anymore so they just focus on chrono more

Damn, reader be going all over the place. Im so glad someone ask for chrono. I love him. He’s a beautiful being.

================================================

Title: Back and Forth

Chronostasis x Reader

Warnings: Angst, fluff, and implied sexual references (not alot of that thoug)

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You were sitting on the edge of your bed as you looked at the carpeted floor beneath you. Breathing heavily as you can’t stop thinking about the man who took your breath away. Chisaki Kai.

“Im a horrible girlfriend.” You place your hands on your face and sigh into them. You weren’t even in a relationship with Chisaki but you couldn’t help looking at him every chance you got.

You felt so guilty, since you were in a relationship with his best friend! You were Chrono’s girlfriend and if he found out he would be heartbroken!

Right?

It was no secret that both of you had been drifting apart the last few months. Which is probably why you grew feelings for his boss in the first place. Chrono barely came by anymore, barely ever said i loved you and was always busy with work.

You did understand that he was willing to follow his best friend to the ends of the earth but..what about you? I mean, you remembered everything about him. His favorite color, his birthday, his favorite food, pretty much everything. But when your birthday rolled around your so called boyfriend was no where to be seen.

Even though that was awhile ago it still hurt you. You felt like you kept giving him second chances. It was starting to get annoying to say the least.

‘i shouldn’t feel guilty. I mean it seems like he does’t even care anymore’ You thought to yourself. You let out a sigh as you get up from your spot on the bed and walk over to the bathroom. You grabbed all your clothes that you needed and went to take a shower.

‘I’ll go see what Chisaki is up to maybe i can watch him for a bit. Who knows?’ You smile to yourself as you hurry up and turn the water on.

================================================

“You know Chrono, I’ve noticed that you and (y/n) have been slowly drifting apart. Haven’t you noticed?” Mimic said to the masked man looking up at him.

“Really? I think were doing fine.”

“I’m just saying to watch out. I’m just worried she’s gonna leave you man. I’ve seen Chisaki give her some looks, or it could just be me.” Mimic said finally before looking at Chrono.

“Wish you the best of luck man.” Mimic walked away right after that leaving the arrow headed male alone.

‘Mimic doesn’t know what he’s talking about. We still have a connection-’ Chrono was pulled out of his thoughts when he heard your giggling coming from Chisaki’s office. His mind went straight to what Mimic said and rushed over there and before he could slam the door open, he listened to your conversations.

“Haha yeah....hey Chisaki can i talk to you about something? It’s about Hari.”

‘What about me?’

“Fire away.”

“Im beginning to think he doesn’t love me anymore. I mean he’s never around me anymore, and anytime he has free time off he wants to be by himself. I know i shouldn’t think this but my mind can’t help to wonder off to the worse case scenario’s.” He noticed a shift in your usual happy tone.

“Well that such a shame, that you feel so alone that you can’t talk to Hari about this. How about you come back to my office tomorrow and we can talk over a game of Shogi?”

“Sure! At least i feel like i have someone to talk to! But still, i feel like breaking up with him. Like i said it doesn’t even seems like he’s trying in the relationship anymore.” So that’s how you truly feel? You feel so alone that you went to talk to his best friend instead of him. Maybe Mimic was right. Now that he’s been thinking about it he has noticed that he has been lacking in the attention department of you relationship. He lets out a soft sigh before heading to your room and falling backwards onto the bed.

Chrono looks up at the ceiling as he takes his mask off and sets it to the side. Looking up at the digital clock by your bed seeing it was close to midnight. Sighing he takes a shower.

“Oh Hari left his mask here. I should probably return it to him.” He jumped as he heard your voice from the other side of the door.

“I’m in the shower!” He yelled out to you, hoping to get some sort of response.

“Okay.” You replied with a bland answer.

================================================

The next day

“Hey Hari i need to talk to you, its....important...” You called out to your soon to be ex. You thought about it long and hard and come to the conclusion that maybe it was for the best that you two broke up. It was a miracle he even slept in the same room with you that night. Nothing intimate happened just went to bed pretty much.

“Yeah w-what is it?” Hari stuttered on his words. He was secretly hoping that you weren’t going to break up with him. Especially not for his boss. He wouldn’t know what to do if that was the case.

“I-I think we s-should break up.” Fuck. He was right you were breaking up with him. God damnit. He should’ve seen the signs that you were unhappy now your leaving him because of it.

“W-why?” He knew why but those words couldn’t help but fall from his mouth.

“Because your always at work, and when your not you barely ever come to hang out with me anymore! It’s like im invisible or not even needed in your life!” You cried out as tears formed on your face.

“....”

“Im gonna go....see you later Kurono.”

Chrono couldn’t do anything all he could do was stand there. Looking at your silhouette as you disappeared out of the base.

“You’ll see Kai for what he truly is soon enough...”

================================================

2 weeks after the breakup

“Hey Chisaki! Fancy seeing you here!” You said as you smiled up at him.

“Ah (y/n) its always a pleasure.”

“What are you doing?”

“Oh....just walking around.” You noticed how his tone changed for a second.

“Dear (y/n) would you like to hang out sometime to play shogi?” Damn my man really likes Shogi.

“Sure! It’s just gonna be awkward seeing Chrono after two weeks...”

“Ah yes i’ve heard that you broke up. Very sorry to hear that....”

================================================

2 months after break up

You had begun to hang out with Chisaki more but you couldn’t shake the uneasy feeling you slowly had developed spending so much time with him. It was the kind of feeling that made you want to shrink in a hole. 

You always caught him slipping on his good guy act, slowly but surely letting out his inner demons. Something that you didn’t want apart of. So you slowly distanced yourself from him and caught yourself losing feelings quickly. 

You saw how he treated Chrono and his other loyal employee’s and to be honest it pissed you off. They were working their ass off to please you, and you still treat them like their nothing?

‘Maybe breaking it off with Chrono was a bad idea..’ You thought to yourself as your mind wondered off to Hari again. You let out a sigh before looking around the base. Chisaki said that you could come and go as you pleased, but take a shower right away as soon as you got in.

Damn his Mysophobia

You looked around as you sat in what they called the ‘living room’. You saw Hari talking to Chisaki and you couldn’t help but notice that Hari looked more...buff? No...he was always strong but he looked like he hit the gym more often. Due to this new revelation you couldn’t help your wandering eyes as you were glued to Hari’s form. In other words checking him out. You had unintentional licked your lips as you continued to bask in Hari’s appearance.

Util his head snapped at you.

You squeak and turn your head quickly to the side as your entire face turned red, embarresssed at the fact you had been caught checking your ex out. Your eyes which you have snapped shut took a peak and saw that he wasn’t where he use to be standing. 

“Ugh i can’t believe i got caught checking him out...ugggghhhhh. He had to be going to the gym! Why couldn’t i stop staring at him. God damn you Hari for being so gorgeous.” You let out a groan in frustration as you placed your hands on your face.

Little did you know that a certain someone was hiding behind the wall snickering as he heard you.

================================================

1 month later

You slowly distanced yourself from Chisaki as the feelings you had for him long gone after you saw the way he treated Hari. You would never admit it but the thought of being in his arms once more soothed you but you knew that he would never take you back after trying to get with his best friend.

You walked the compound halls as you made your way to your once shared room with Hari. You had forgotten something awhile ago and went to pick it up. You mentally prayed he wouldn’t be there but of course to your luck as soon as you opened the door a shirtless Hari was standing in front of you.

You yelped as you tried to shut the door before you were caught in two strong arms trapping you.

“H-Hari?! What are you doing?!” You squeaked out as you felt his grip around your waist tighten. You felt his hot breath on your neck as tiny kisses were placed on your neck effectively making you whimper. Hari only snickered as he nibbled your earlobe before huskily whispering in you ear,

“Taking back what’s mine.” Was the last hing he said before he dragged you to the bed.

[cmi-miu]

Ya’aburnee - Chapter 7 (Seventeen Soulmate AU)

Soulmate AU: The last words your soulmate says to you are the words tattooed on your wrist.

Pairing: SoonWoo, JiHan, SeokHao

Title: Ya'aburnee (arabic): yak-BER-nee (n.) lit. "you bury me"; the hope that your lover or beloved will outlive you as to spare yourself the pain of living beyond that person.

Chapter Summary: This is a JiHan chapter so obviously it’s plain and simple fluff sprinkled with a little bit of Hosh and Josh sibling love.

Jisoo eyes the Skype icon that keeps vibrating as he curses the day Soonyoung was born. He had clearly told his brother he’d come online today and lo and behold! Soonyoung was nowhere to be seen. He’s this close to disowning the man when the great Mr Kwon Soonyoung finally decides to answer the call.

“I know I am late but please understand I couldn’t find my laptop charger!” Soonyoung speaks a mile a minute to avoid Jisoo’s chiding. When he sees the man’s frown only double in size, he brings out his hands in front of him and waves them about exclaiming, “I’m sorry im sorry im sorry!”

At brother’s pleading expression and pouting lips, Jisoo doesn’t stand a chance. And it seems Soonyoung knows because he’s part snickering as he apologises. “Urgh!” Jisoo screams, pulling at his hair comically and had Soonyoung not been begging the man for forgiveness, he would’ve guffawed at his expression. “I hate when you make that face!”

Soonyoung knows now that he’s in the clear so he snickers and exclaims, “love you too, Josh!” He shakes his head when Jisoo mock glares at him and raises an eye cheekily as he asks, “so? Where’s Jeonghan? I wanna meet him! Show me! Show me! Show me!”

Rolling his eyes and sighing Jisoo places his elbow on the table and his face in his palm, grouching, “he just went to the bathroom. We’d been waiting for half an hour.”

“I’m sorry,” Soonyoung whines, “I just got back from work. I’m exhausted.” The younger slams his head into his pillow making his tablet fall down. Propping it up by its side, Soonyoung continues looking at Jisoo with a wonky smile. It’s a different colour of Soonyoung and Jisoo can’t put a finger on it but something seems to have changed.

The elder chooses to voice his suspicious out with a tiny grin, “you seem content. Not happy, but content” Soonyoung laughs at his brother’s comment. The same old, crinkled eyes, hands on his mouth laughter. “Is it safe to assume you have a crush? Who is it? Your boss?”

Soonyoung’s expression sours at the words and he crinkles his nose funnyly, “my Boss is an old man, old man. And no,” Soonyoung shakes his head, his hair flopping, “I’m not crushing on anyone lately. I just had a good time last weekend with Wonwoo.”

Now Jisoo is very curious. Soonyoung having a good time is, in itself, a miracle ever since he forced himself into this marriage with Wonwoo. And to think that he’s had a good time with said husband? Jisoo absolutely has to know what’s that all about.

“Why? What’d you guys do?” Jisoo asks nonchalantly. Trying very hard to hide his curiosity about the matter.

“Nothing much,” Soonyoung shrugs, a small smile on his lips, “we watched some anime. Ate some ice cream. Talked a little.” Looking back into the tablet camera, Soonyoung continues to smile as he says, “we just had a good time.”

“Well,” the elder begins, “I’m glad you two are getting along.”

The man of the other end of the call coughs a little and his expression turns uncomfortable, as he tries to steal his gaze from his brother. “I wouldn’t exactly call it getting along…” Soonyoung licks his lips uneasily and tries to think of how to continue, “we’re back to ignoring each other again but I feel like I at least know something we have in common now. Besides being unhappy with our marriage.”

“Soonyoung…” Jisoo begins already at a loss for what to say next. He wants to comfort his brother somehow, but he already knows he can’t. “Soonyoung, I know you’re scared to try but sometimes, you have to be the one to initiate any kind of friction between each other. It’s frustrating, I know.” The elder huffs a sigh and shakes his head as he continues, “I know it’s frustrating to not know if you’ll make it. It’s infuriating when you have to start all the conversations. When you don’t have a choice. But Wonwoo is a very nice guy. He’s just a little shy.”

“I know, Josh,” Soonyoung mumbles, turning on his side to stare up at the ceiling. “it’s just… after Mingyu… I’m not ready. In fact, I don’t want to. I’m happy with us just being friendly strangers. I don’t want to lose the one thing that is set in stone for me. He’s not… he’s not Mingyu.”

And the elder knows that’s not all of Soonyoung’s worries. No one would know better than him how much Soonyoung has suffered at the hands of fate just to end up in an unhappy marriage with a heartbroken man. From being rejected to having to reject so many.

To having to hear those dreaded words before saying goodbye to his soulmate.

Soonyoung has suffered so many heartbreaks in his small twenty-seven years of life that Jisoo can’t even fathom how the man smiles at him every time they speak.

He remembers that one time when Soonyoung was sixteen and had confessed to a girl that he liked her, only to be rudely rejected because she was already in love with someone else.

When Soonyoung was eighteen and had gone out with another for two days before he was dumped because the words on his wrist scared her (as if it was Soonyoung that would cause her death).

And that time when Soonyoung was twenty-one, his boyfriend had dumped him because he was so sure he had found his soulmate.

Or when Soonyoung was only twenty-five when his third boyfriend died after saying goodbye. When the words on Soonyoung’s left hand wrist glowed golden as his soulmate boarded the plane.

Yep. Life didn’t deal Soonyoung the best cards and Jisoo was no stranger to this. But, seeing his brother smiling quietly, despite his worried eyes staring back at him, he couldn’t help but wonder if Soonyoung had finally found a person to call his own now.

“I think Wonwoo’s the one, Soonyoung,” Jisoo mutters, smiling quietly at his brother. “Try and get to know him. Try and be the sixteen-year-old who randomly confessed to a girl because he liked her stockings.”

Soonyoung laughs out loud at the mention of Minyeo, his high school crush, and relishes in his attempt at a proper confession. He’d always been a little too impulsive when it came to feelings and even, he found it disturbing sometimes.

“Let’s keep sixteen-year-old me out of the conversation,” Soonyoung sniggers, “and talk about Mr Yoon Jeonghan. Where is he?”

“Oh! Right!” Jisoo grins, turning his head to the bathroom and screaming, “Jeonghan! Come out now or I’m bringing the phone into the shower!”

Soonyoung sniggers at his dramatic brother and watches Jisoo smile when the sound of the bathroom door opening makes him look up.

“Soonyoung?” Wonwoo calls him then. Soonyoung turns to find him peeping into the room as if unsure if he’s allowed to enter his home office. Soonyoung smiles at his husband, lazily waving him over as he points at his tablet.

“Jisoo’s online!” He exclaims, smirking giddily when Wonwoo rushes over to his side and pushes him out of the screen to say hello to his brother.

“Josh!” Wonwoo waves at him, smiling happily. “How’s LA?”

“Wonwoo! LA is amazing! The weather here is to die for! You two should’ve been here!”

“Maybe next time,” Wonwoo smiles, shooting a glance at Soonyoung who looks just as baffled by the declaration as Jisoo does. “Where’s that mysterious boyfriend of yours that Soonyoung’s always talking about?”

Jisoo starts speaking but before he can even get a word out the camera shakes violently and his voice turns staticky.

“Is he out now?” Soonyoung yells into his headphones, but he can't make out anything his brother is saying. Annoyance discolours Jisoo’s face and then the camera turns to show a handsome young man waving at Soonyoung and Wonwoo.

They laugh at the goofy smile on the man’s face. They already know it’s Jeonghan, Jisoo’s boyfriend, acting cheeky in the video call, completely ignoring his angry boyfriend in the background.

The camera shakes a little and Jeonghan’s face comes into view. There are soap suds under his chin, and he looks every bit of that goof Jisoo had said he was. And Soonyoung giggles at the man waving a soapy hand at him, supposedly speaking. But the audio is lost.

Jisoo jumps up behind his boyfriend and seems to be yelling at the man, pointing at the phone and Soonyoung is severely confused but everything that’s going on screen is hilarious. Even without the audio, both Soonyoung and Wonwoo can tell that Jeonghan probably did something while picking up the phone that made the audio cut and now Jisoo was yelling at the taller man. Hands on his hips and a full-on mommy expression of his face.

Jeonghan pouting like a little boy with his head down is the cherry on top and Soonyoung finds himself laughing till his cheeks hurt.

But that’s not even the best part of the call. It’s when Wonwoo carelessly leans on his shoulder while laughing like a madman at his brother.

It’s the pleasant weight on his shoulders that Wonwoo is generous enough to grace him with that makes the night wonderful.

Soonyoung cuts the call after a while when Jisoo texts him that Jeonghan got water into the speakers and now the audio doesn’t work anymore.

They end up laughing for another hour at his brother’s obvious annoyance.

[notyobabygirl]

my boyfriend bought me Jordan 1’s for christmas. and he didn’t get me the “nicest” pair but they were still $350 on GOAT for the kids sizes. and idk why but a lot of guys in the “sneaker community” hate on mids, they only think highs are acceptable, and the pair i got are mids which i wanted because i think they’re cuter. so i posted them on my instagram story last night when they got delivered, and i was worried some guys would say negative stuff. and one guy that idk replied “your bf got you some cheap mids” and just kept talking shit that they were ugly and that he overpaid. and idk why but it made me soo mad like people are honestly so weird and negative. i was like “imagine caring about someone else’s shoes this much” but only 90 people had seen the story since i posted it at 3am and i got embarrassed and took it down. i’m kinda mad at myself for letting one negative reply make me delete it, like i really wish i didn’t care so much about what other people say in general.

like whenever anyone says something negative about me or anything that has to do with my life/boyfriend, i let it get to me so much. like the tiniest comments from people will stick with me for days and bother me. like rn, that guy that dm’d me had slid in my dm’s flirting with me before but i ignored him so he was prob being rude on purpose because of that. but now i feel stupid for having my bf get me those shoes because of what he said about them, even though i think they’re cute. like i’m really letting some loser talk shit about my new shoes and it’s getting to me lol it’s so stupid. but idk how to get myself to a point where i don’t care what other people think or say. or at least not letting it ruin my entire week like i usually do. sorry that was a long explanation but im so annoyed with it all.

wow thats such a nice Christmas present sooo jealous!!!! I have been wanting an exact pair I wonder if you got the color I was looking at hahah. to me that just seems like that kid was extremely jealous and the fact that he has flirted with you before just goes to show hes jealous and wanted to say something stupid like that to get you mad. you cant give the power to people like that to ruin your whole day. its just not worth it. if you encounter negative or mean people, thats because they are unhappy in their own lives. its as simple as that. I know its annoying but you just have to let that shit go because its not worth it. hope they find happiness and peace and dont let it affect you. your bigger than that!

[karasumajo]

I read through the old messages with my last favorite person.

I never realized how easily I would bend to his word and needs 😅 or just how much affection and care I'd give to him. At the time I guess I wouldn't have, I use to react purely on emotions and feelings without a thought.

I guess if makes sense that my ex didn't like him, but I would still talk to him and make time and do my best to always be there for him. Now, looking back,I guess I could see why my ex boyfriend felt the threat from him. But it was purely just friendship.

I guess I liked having someone to care about and who depended on my being there for them.

There was a conversation I saw between him and I

Him: "Are you awake?"

Me: "of course, what's up?"

Him: "I just really need someone. I'm feeling anxious, sad, I can't sleep."

Me: " :( I'm always here ____♡ it's okay. Do you want to talk on the phone? Want to come over? Want foods?"

Him: "idk, I guess not being alone would be nice, ill head over."

Me: "okay, I'll make something to eat! We can sit outside and eat! See you soon ♡"

It was like 2am. I remember that day was a terrible day at work but I wanted to be there for him lol. But it was always that way when he didn't want to be alone, and I always made myself available to him.

We even had a conversation once where he proposed that if when we are older and single, perhaps we can just have some kind of FWB relationship 😅 and I just...agreed. like I didn't even factor in how that might effect me.

Anyway, what hurt me to read was when I realized I was begging him to talk to me. I mean I don't blame him, his relationship would obviously be more important than me and also I guess having me as a friend was a liability. But I did my best to keep boundaries for him and his gf. I just wanted him to talk to me at least.

But then, one day, he said something....so ...stupid lol

We had gone to the mall together as we usually did, and his gf called, asked what he was up To.

He told her.. "I'm at the mall with my ex."

.......

Not (my name here). Not "my best friend". Not even just "my friend". MY EX. WHO TF SAYS THAT ???

So I guess she obviously was unhappy and he goes to take the call privately. I started feeling anxious and like I'm doing something wrong... 😅 when he came back I asked if that's all he sees me as? His ex? And he said Well you are, you're my ex girlfriend after all, im not going to lie to her.

I said but ____ ...I'm you're friend... 😅. And he said Yeah, but we dated. You're my ex.

So here we are at the mall, I just bought him all these gifts because yknow I'm a dumb bitch, and he's just there calling me his ex and nonchalantly... 😅

That's where things went downhill.

His girlfriend hated me. My existence. I guess rightfully so...but she never would tell him to get shit together, she would come after me about it with messages and phone calls...it was stressful lol.

Then when I thought things were fine, everything finally was hashed out, I still have my fp, his gf is actually cool, she's my new friend. Everything is fine

He blocked me.

He didn't just block me, but basically erased my existence from his life.

Couldn't text or call him. Couldn't DM him. Couldn't send him a fb message. Literally nothing.

His brother told me he got rid of all the paintings I made for him. All the gifts.

He deleted me.

And I just... didn't exist anymore.

I panicked. I got scared and I got anxious and I tried what I could to just get a word out of him, something. Just tell me WHY?????? lol..like why just shut me out, in like the most random and hurtful way possible? After everything, don't I at least deserve a heads up? An explanation? Idk, something? Fucking smoke signals? A letter? An email?????

That was it. He just deleted me. My last message to him I left on IG was

"____ I'm not even angry at this point. Just please tell me what I did wrong now? Please just tell me what happened? I'm sorry if I hurt you or if I hurt ______ in anyway...Just don't shut me out like this please. Whatever your reasons are at this point okay fine but just please tell me why and what I did. I just need to at least know.."

I got no reply back and that was the last message.

For the next following days, weeks, months. I guess I went through withdrawal of not talking to him everyday 😅 not having that friendship. I was depressed, crying all the time, anxiety would rise and fall throughout the day dramatically. I'd anxiously look at my phone hoping he'd replied. But I never got anything.

I missed him.

After some time, another person we knew told me that he was talking about me at his job. At first I thought "oh? Maybe he's thinking of talking to me again?"

But no.

He talked about what a shit friend I was. How I never showed care. How I apparently was always such a bitch and didn't know how to just chill out. How I was always so intense and my favorite "she's a mess".

He read my message, and told everyone he didn't bother replying because "how can she not see how she's a lot".

😅

So naturally, I emailed him 😂.

I told him how much I hated him, how he's a piece of shit, how dare he call me a bad friend. I told him what a little bitch he is and how I wanted to beat his face in and to stay the fuck away from me forever.

Yknow, all that good stuff...

I mean clearly, yeah, I'm a mess. But I wasn't a bad friend. That much I knew, but it didn't matter. The thoughts ate me up. The worry and overthinking had a field day in my head. The constant thought of "you see how you're so much you just fuck shit up? Why can't you just be normal?"

He made me question my own sanity, my love, the way I am. Am I really innocent? What if he's right? What I even fooled myself into thinking I'm good but really, what if I'm just so evil that I'm good at manipulating others into believing I'm good?

I still wonder that tho, I live in constant doubt of myself and my own intentions, I wonder if I'll ever be able to just be me and not feel like I constantly need to validate and confirm my own emotions and feelings accordingly. It's tiring and now I don't even know how to just react without thinking about my reactions first.

Today he tried pretending non of that happened. Like he never had anything to do with the way I am now. He smiled, he joked, he talked to me, he tried hugging me. He took me to Chipotle to get lunch. Then he asked me about how I've been and how I've been dealing with my anxiety. Because he worried.....

LOL EX-FUCKING-SCUSE ME SIR???????

Needless to say I went off and told him how we are just coworkers and he lost the right to ask that question forever ago.

Still, the fucked up part is, I still miss him. 🙄 ew.

I don't even know why I'm writing all this. Maybe Because writing it makes it so that it's out of my head and here. Maybe a small part of me felt happy today because small moments felt like the old days. With his dumb jokes and always finding ways to make me laugh and smile.

Mostly I guess to remind myself why I can't let myself be swayed back in a friendship with someone like him. Because I know that if I did, it would just end the same and I would have played myself again.

Womp, well that was a lot 😅 im gonna go back to sleep now, this kinda helped I guess.

Sorry for the long rant and shit 😅 goodnight nobody and everybody!

[kimnjss]

omg not me missing three updates 😰 lemme try n put all my thoughts into one ask.. might be a long one 🥴

but not namjoon losing his cool immediately entering the party and his eyes looking for her LMAOOO no wonder why his friends come for his throat 😭 he just makes it too damn obvious 💀

i could be reaching but could yoongi be someone that yn could confine in comfortably without bias?? idk just based on the small interaction we saw between the two of them at the bar.. cause since he’s not a part of her inner circle but they seem comfortable enough with each other to talk about some things?? but then namjoon talks to yoongi a lot so maybe im making nothing into something for no reason..

but her dad.. he sucks ass like damn he really made sure she’s never gonna leave the music industry when she wants no part in it. i can see why yn is “self-sabotaging” her position but not the part where it comes at the expense of other peoples livlihood.. also hoseok lives and breathes music, he loves what he does and is capable of running things himself.. so why does he need both his kids?? what gives bruh..

omg NOT JOON JUST GOING FOR THE KISS OMFGSNSNDJSNWJ WHAT the no warnings was a lie.. rude 🤧 BUT YIKES AFTER THAT 😳 so much is happening rn my minds going ↘️↗️⬆️🔄↪️⬇️

namjoon what happened to not giving a shit about her bruv.. at least youre not lying to yourself not liking her but you do be still lying to yourself sometimes.. but!! i do understand way he reacted the way he did afterwards.. like kissing someone who’s in a “relationship” and that same person being his boss, career on the line if things got out of hand bc he just got signed and hadnt debuted under the new company yet..

although it was kinda like cold water was thrown at yn tho bc 😬 is this the first time that an encounter like this didnt lead to something more for her?? like someone didnt take the risk with her?? or is she seeing this as a flat out rejection?? bc namjoon finally showed some sort of interest and when he caved, he immediately backed out..

wait is she back to her normal self after the lunch with namjoon?? ong this is what i get for catching up and absorbing too much information at once 😩 -🤼‍♀️

ahhh!! hi ., we’ve got a lot to get through lmao . 

namjoon is so absolutely full of shit lmao ., the first thing he did was look for her nd then he continued to do that for the entire night . nd literally all it took was her taking a little bit of her attention off of him (she had started being more professional a bit before the party) ., now the boy has no idea what to do w himself . 

// yn would definitely be able to take more freely around yoongi ., buut it’s not so much because of the fact that he’s not in her friend group - it’s more so that yoongi really doesn’t care abt things that don’t directly involve him ., so instead of trying to tell her how to do things nd kind of taking control of the situation ., he’d be more inclined to listen to her nd give her light suggestions that he thinks is in her best interest - without being pushy . (jin nd jungkook just let her do whatever assuming she’ll figure it out ., while hobi is more often than not giving orders) . //

at this point ., yn cares so little for the job nd is willing to do anything to keep from having to stay there that she’s not even thinking abt the other people that are effected by her behavior . at least not in the moment ., there’s a lot of times where she goes back nd realizes that she’s wrong (the thing w hyungwon in the studio being one example) . but most of the time it’s like collateral damage bc she’s so unhappy ., she can’t really look past that . 

// it’s safe to say that joon was always somewhat curious abt her ., but didn’t really let himself get close . but then after she was getting in trouble because of him nd then working a bit harder he started to see her differently . nd then on top of that she was opening up to him at the party so he’s seeing more sides of her that sort of eliminates what he first thought of her . he’s starting to understand her a bit more nd slowly (very slowly) accepting that he might be a little bit interested . which was amplified w alcohol of course ., so that’s where the sudden kiss is coming from . 

- as soon as they’re being interrupted ., he has enough time to overthink so he’s quickly reverting back to how he was before . 

+ yn is very much stuck on being wanted ., the little story abt how she knows hr dad never wanted a girl - in turn never wanted her ., has a lot to do w it . so the sad way she asks joon if he didn’t want to kiss her is like a peak into that ., she likes to feel wanted (the multiple boyfriends thing could kinda fall into that too) ., so she was more put off by the thought that joon doesn’t want her when she wants him (nd she’s slowly realizing it’s more than the greedy want she has w her boyfriends) . 

since the thing w hyungwon ., she has done nothing but work nd concentrate on getting her work done - so the little trip out w namjoon might’ve helped her loosen up ., but she’s still got a lot going on . she’s not going to be one hundred percent until she’s able to deal w her dad nd break away from that job . 

[lazydaizies]

Sometimes I get just mad enough to rant....

It infuriates me when people look at someone who struggles with mental illness (Lili) and assume it’s because of her relationship, or that her relationship isn’t enough to keep her steady.  A relationship does not cure anxiety and depression.  Let me say that again for the morons in the back...

A RELATIONSHIP DOES NOT CURE ANXIETY AND DEPRESSION!!!

Good God, I would think people knew this by now.  I suffer from anxiety, I have for most of my life and sometimes I have bouts of depression and let me tell you, it is not indictive of how my life is going.  I have a very happy marriage and family life is wonderful and life in general is wonderful and I have no complaints about anything usually.  Yet, I still struggle with anxiety almost on a daily basis.  Of course having a shitty life can obviously cause anxiety and depression, but it’s pretty fucking obvious that Lili has an amazing life and that she’s very much loved in her relationship.  That’s not going to cure her illness and anybody with a brain should know this.  I sometimes see people ask things about celebs like....why is this famous person an alcoholic, they have so much money, they have a great life, shouldn’t they be happy?  Why are they drinking or doing drugs?  Why are they unhappy?  BECAUSE HAVING IT ALL DOES NOT MEAN YOUR MENTAL HEALTH IS FINE.  And in Lili’s case, BEING IN A HAPPY RELATIONSHIP DOES NOT MEAN HER ANXIETY AND DEPRESSION IS CURED.

The reason ive decided to go off and believe me, anyone who follows me knows i usually don’t give a shit about celeb discourse, is because i came online this morning and saw all this back and forth about Lili’s post and people actually wondering why she’s struggling if she’s in a happy relationship and i had literally just had a panic attack.  This morning I woke up completely riddled with anxiety.  I seriously opened my eyes and it just slammed into my stomach and my heart was racing and my hands started to hurt and I lay there and was like....ok whats happened, why am I freaking out?  Is everyone ok??? I called my daughter and she came running and all I could manage was....”is everyone okay” and she is used to me panicking a lot for no reason (sadly) and she simply and calmly said “everything is ok mom, can I get you some water?” (I’d also like to add that my daughter, who is just shy of 14, also really struggles with anxiety and depression and has dealt with cutting and suicidal thoughts)  We don’t have a bad life, our life is calm and lovely and we still struggle.  A happy relationship doesn’t change that!

 ANXIETY AND DEPRESSION NEED NO REASON.  Especially if you’ve struggled for years with it.  Are there triggers? Sure, and life stress can be one of them but mostly, it just comes, it gives no reason, it is a chemical or hormonal imbalance that needs attention.  I suffer from PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome) and one of the symptoms is anxiety.  Another one is rage and we won’t talk about that today.  It is basically a condition that completely fucks up a woman’s hormonal system and everything is off balance.  It’s not something that I can help in any way and no man is going to cure that.  No man or relationship will ever cure a woman’s anxiety and depression, no matter what the reason is that she suffers from it.  In my case, it’s PCOS, in another woman, who know?  A man’s support can be an enormous help, but it will NEVER be a cure.  A happy relationship is a tremendous help and support, but it is not a cure and recognizing that sometimes you need extra help is huge in getting better and kudos to Lili for seeing that.

They work hard, and im not one to be like...oh poor babies, working so hard....but I do know that long hours, not enough sleep, stress can be a lot for someone with a mental illness and coming home to an amazing boyfriend/husband isn’t going to change that.

So to anyone who has never suffered from mental illness and anyone who doesn’t understand it, shut the fuck up and sit down!

End rant.

[communistvashoth]

little. wafle about good omens and the queerbaiting thing

i want to preface this by saying i love both neil gaiman and terry pratchett; i love their books, i think they’re great authors, and i think they’ve both done wonderful, progressive things in their various works, good omens being no exception. i dont think good omens is awful and homophobic, im not trying to “cancel” anyone, i just want to share my perspective on why, maybe, in this instance, this time, neil gaiman has not handled this particular issue with all the grace and tact he maybe could have.

for the record, the stir about good omens and queerbaiting -which, from what i have seen, is a very gentle stir, more of a mild disgruntlement than actual, angry discourse- isn’t because “crowley and aziraphale didnt kiss/fuck on screen, therefore it’s not canon therefore it’s queerbaiting!”. i have seen literally no one say that. the reason people are put out, again, very mildly, is because it wasnt made canon in any way. it’s not that people think there must be kissing and/or fucking for a relationship to be canon. they could have said “i love you” or held hands or leaned their heads on each other’s shoulders or anything else like that. there are a million ways to communicate explicitly that two characters have a romantic relationship without showing kissing or fucking. and they also could have just not made them canon and not mentioned it, and be done with it. people would have been disappointed, but it wouldn’t really be queerbaiting.

the issue people have is that the possibility is brought up, but only as a joke; both the book and the show do this. someone consoles aziraphale on the street after seeing what they interpret as a break up between him and crowley, one of the angels calls crowley his boyfriend, shadwell calls him a pansy; in the book, aziraphale is literally described as appearing gay to people who meet him, anathema assumes he and crowley are a couple, and at one point, he’s called a f*ggot (which, im not pointing out as like a callout, it’s not shown as good, but it still happens). it’s just that when people said “hey, what about this, but genuinely?” that the response became “oh no, these man-shaped beings are actually genderless and don’t have sexualities and we won’t confirm or deny that they’re in love” which. is kind of a cop out. and i can respect authors leaving things ambiguous; no one is obligated to be explicit about things. but they’re not genderless anywhere else; they’re described as men, they look like men, they’re received and treated like men, they assume the roles of men, and they have their relationship called gay as a joke like men. if they’re not men enough to be gay, why are they men enough to be “f*ggot”?

the issue here, for many people, if being able to point to something and say “these characters are queer. this story is about queer love. queer love is valuable and beautiful and it belongs in stories, and it’s in this one, and you cant do anything about it.” saying “they aren’t queer but they aren’t not queer” does not give us that ability. 

AND THAT’S FINE

no one is obligated to make their work political like that. the problem arises when the interpretation “these characters are queer” is met with “no, they’re not, and you can’t prove they are” which it always, always is. characters are assumed heterosexual, always, period. queer interpretations will always take a back seat, they will always be seen as a bit weird and a bit ridiculous. so when there is nothing explicit in the text (meaning obvious, unassailable, indisputable) that marks a character or a relationship as queer, then it isn’t. it’s not canon unless it’s made canon. all the swelling music and longing looks in the world can be written off; if you have to write lists and essays as evidence that something is queer, it’s not canon. maybe it’s coded all to hell, but it’s no canon. and, again, that’s fine. what isnt fine, though, is actively making fun of the queer interpretation, within the text. if there is a joke or a jab from a villain about two people being “boyfriends” it only works if they’re not. if someone is called a “f*ggot” or “pansy” it’s only lighthearted if they’re not. if someone consoles a character about a break up, it’s only a joke if it’s a misunderstanding. so if those things are present in the text, and they are supposed to be jokes, they are textual evidence that the characters and relationship are not queer. and there are no equal and opposing jokes in support.

that is why people are unhappy. because they had the option of turning a joke of “look at these two guys, arent they gay, isnt that funny” into an actual queer story, and almost everyone wanted them to. and they weren’t afraid of pissing people off; they made adam and eve black, they gave god a woman’s voice, they made war a woman, they showed a quite brutal scene of jesus’ crucifixion, they made demons appealing and angels unsettling, they wrote a comedy about revelations, they were not worried about upsetting anyone. they could absolutely have made crowley and aziraphale queer. but they didn’t. they chose not to. neil gaiman chose not to. put that all together, and, yeah, that feels a lot like queerbaiting, especially since, from what i can tell, the crowley/aziraphale shippers have been the ones keeping their little fandom going for years. 

it’s not because people cant conceptualise of a romance denoted by anything but sexual intimacy. it’s because the story is full of gay jokes, but when people said, “so are they gay?” they got a noncommittal answer that every homophobic asshole will point to for the rest of time as evidence that there’s nothing queer in the canon, and they’ll be right. 

[amoureuxctzen]

ohhh omg could you write e with mark? but super angsty...

this took ages but yeah… im not very good at angst so i hope it’s up to your expectations lol i added e along with a request i got for d because i thought they’d fit? 

E  "ever wondered what it would be like if you stayed?”

D - “don’t you ever, for a second, say I didn’t try.”

“Ever wondered what it would be like if you stayed?” you wanted to ask him that so bad. He was standing right in front of you, so why weren’t you saying anything. Why weren’t you asking him whether leaving you behind was really the right decision. The pressure of being a good idol along with the pressure of being a good boyfriend was too much for Mark to handle. While you were aware of his celebrity status, you assured him that you wouldn’t let it get in the way of your relationship. You convinced yourself that you could be a low-maintenance significant other to him, that he shouldn’t feel obligated to call or text you everyday. That sudden changes in his schedule that affected dates you had planned weeks ahead would not upset you. That you wouldn’t argue with him for never being around; But you were way in over your head. You couldn’t bear not having him around, but of course this was his job and he had no choice but to prioritize it over you. Of course, this was difficult for Mark, but it had to be done. He tried his best to fit you into his packed schedule, but it seemed as if no matter how hard he tried, it was never enough for you. You always had some kind of complaint. Either he was late, couldn’t spend enough time with you or you simply didn’t find the date special and declared it as a waste of time. All this lead Mark to believe that you were unhappy in your relationship and decided it’d be best to go your separate ways. 

You were devastated, seeing as it was the exact opposite of what you had wanted, but no amount of begging was able to convince Mark that you really wanted to be with him. He left you and everything you had together behind, along with the question “Is he happy without me?”. You tried not thinking about him, but your mind tended to wander. You’d ask yourself whether he was okay, did he find someone new? Your mind was always occupied with thoughts and memories of him. After he left you were convinced that you’d never see him again, but here you were standing across from him in a quiet cafe, unsure of whether you should greet him and make small talk, or walked passed him and go about your day. While the second option seemed more appealing to you, you didn’t want to seem like a bitter ex. You approached him with a cautious greeting and asked if he was waiting for anyone. 

Feeling both guilty and relieved that he said no you worked up the courage to ask him if he’d like to sit down and catch up, making sure that he knew you didn’t have any further intentions. Your conversation was dull, there wasn’t much to talk about and there was a lot of tension between you two. You tried relieving said tension by asking him if he was seeing anyone, but that only seemed to had made it worse. You held your mug tightly with both hands, feeling the warmth at your fingertips before speaking

 “I didn’t think I’d see you again.”

“What do you mean, I wouldn’t really say we ended things on bad terms.”

His words caught you by surprise, sure it could have been worse but you wouldn’t exactly say the situation he left you in was good.

“Mark, I was heartbroken when you left. Do you not understand how much it hurt? How could you say we ended things on good terms.”

Now it was his turn to be shocked. Cocking an eyebrow at you and leaning forward, looking you in the eye he said “Do you not understand how much I hurt? I gave you my all and it was never enough, even when I decided that you’d be better off with someone else, someone who can give you everything you’d ever need, anything you’d ever want, it still wasn’t enough for you. Even then you wanted more. Did you expect me to stay with someone who completely disregarded my feelings in favor of their own? You can go around saying I broke your heart, saying that I left you in the dirt,” he stood up, violently pushing his seat back before looking at you one last time. “but don’t you ever, for a second, say I didn’t try.”