#“being able to feel safe with other people”
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megamindsecretlair · 1 day ago
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'Twas the Night
Pairing: Terry Richmond x Black!Fem!/ Plus Size reader
Warnings: 18+, Minors DNI, You are in charge of your own reading experience. Intentional use of AAVE. FLUFF, SMUT. Cursing, teasing, PIV, oral (male and female receiving), fingering (female receiving), minor OC lore (sorry!) Use of pet name. Mentions of the n-word, all consensual. Bad jokes, a different side to Terry. Sorry if I missed some. (Some meta jokes and winks and self-indulgent asf)
Summary: Treating yourself to a winter writing getaway, you are startled when the homeowner forgot to mention the 6’3 handyman that came by to fix things around the house. You find an unlikely friendship with the man, opening up about your romance novel. But when you confess that you need some inspiration, Terry is all too happy to be of service. 
Word Count: 19,198k
AO3 Link
A/N: WHEW. Forgive me for being late, I was nervous about this one. It's self-indulgent like a MF. I love this Reader and Terry SOOOO bad. I had a hard time letting this one end. So I hope you enjoy it as much as I did! Toss a coin to your blogger by leaving a comment, gif, or unhinged ask.
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Snow crunched under your tire as you pulled up to the quaint cabin at the top of the mountain. You leaned forward in your seat, looking up at the address to make sure it matched. It did. This was the place.
You were glad the outside matched the picture. You couldn’t count how many times you arrived at an Air B&B, just for the lister to pull some fuck shit. 
For now, it looked like it lived up the hype. And you made it in time to watch the sun set over North Carolina a little later. You gripped the steering wheel and squealed with delight. This was perfect. Absolutely perfect. 
You rolled your truck up to the small, attached garage and got out of the car. You went up the wooden steps to the wide porch that looked ripped from a magazine. There was a hunter green swing set with a pillowed pad on top of the bench. It even had cute throw pillows to match. 
Per the owner’s instructions, you were able to easily find the key box disguised as a lantern. You unscrewed the false bottom, retrieved the key and garage door opener, and replaced the bottom. 
You headed back to the awaiting truck, looking back at the cabin. You still couldn’t believe that this was all yours for the next two months while you worked on your latest novel. Your family was sad about you missing Christmas and New Year’s with them, but you had all grown out of the traditions. There was no point to be around just to be around. 
By the end of this, you were going to have a rough draft to show your agent. That was a guarantee. You pulled your beanie down before getting back in your truck and pulled into the garage.
You entered and turned on lights as you went through the house, familiarizing yourself with the layout and decor. The owner went with a sage green theme, the cabinets in the kitchen painted to match the small fireplace in the living room adjacent to it. There was a throw blanket in the living room with the same color and you had a hunch that the bedroom would be much the same. 
The cabin held two distinct buildings with a short hallway to connect it. The bedroom was modest, room enough to not feel claustrophobic but it wasn’t huge either. You checked and true to form, the bedroom held nothing electrical in it. 
The king sized bed was almost too big for the room, but it really brought everything together. And yes, there was a sage green throw across the foot of the bed. The artwork on the walls were as non-offensive as possible, full of pictures of trees and animals. 
You pulled your phone from your jacket pocket and started recording. “Hey ya’ll, I made it safe and sound. And it’s like the pictures so it’s not a scam! I am loving all these windows but ugh, can these people do anything other than white curtains, white sheets, and pastels? Like damn, I don’t know if I feel safe around all this white!” 
You giggled as you went through the house, checking things out but mostly checking for anything weird or creepy. No cameras, no drilled holes, no false paintings. You showed a few things around the house and then flipped the camera towards you.
“I am signing off, my loves. I’ve got my inspection to do. Love you bunches, I hope to be two-hundred and seventy pages heavier after this!” You blew a kiss into the camera and then sent it to your friends and family. 
Almost immediately, your mom started in on the issue with you being out in the mountains by yourself. Your sister piped in to remind your mom that you were grown, still in the state, and it was pretty sexist to say a woman needed a man to protect her all the time. 
“Exactly,” you agreed out loud. You put up your phone and then really got to business. You took off your purple jacket and hung it on the coat rack by the door. You took off your purple hoodie and hung that up as well.  
You put on your headphones and your favorite cleaning playlist, full of hip hop and R&B oldies. Then, you retrieved cleaning supplies from your car and went through the house with a fine-tooth comb.
Some may call you…odd. And that was fair. You knew how annoying you could be about cleanliness, but you just really wanted to avoid getting sick. You turned into an entire baby when you got sick and considering no one was around to give you said princess treatment, it was best to remain healthy.
That and people were just plain fucking nasty. 
Luckily, it seemed like this cabin was professionally cleaned. You mostly sanitized every surface you could find, dancing and shaking your booty to the songs as they came on. “Never Too Much” by Luther Vandross came on while you were mopping the kitchen. 
You danced around the small kitchen in your mop slippers, singing into the mop handle as if it were a microphone. You sang along with Luther at the top of your lungs, badly, and let the song keep you energized. 
You headed to the bedroom with a black light to check over the sheets and mattress. There were a few specks of mysterious origins which was to be expected, but the mattress was fresh. The sheets were clean as well, but you weren’t going to hop in someone else’s sheets anyway. 
You hauled deep rose bedding into the room from your car and made up the bed how you liked. You brought your own pillows as well, fluffing it on top. Now the space was starting to feel comfortable. Your anxiety lowered inch by smooth inch. 
You looked around the bedroom, scanning for anything you might have missed. Your eyes caught on the window, on the mix of oranges and pinks. 
“Shit!” You screamed as you tore through the house, towards the kitchen, and made you a quick cup of tea. You doctored it how you liked and then added cold water. You took the mug and your own blanket outside to the back porch. 
The owner had built another world in the backyard. The patio was covered with an awning that connected to the house. There were egg chairs and a sofa set up around a stylish oak table. Plants sat in planters around the area and there was a rug underneath the table. Fairy lights were strewn about giving the space a warm glow.
“Oh fuck yessss,” you groaned, sitting down in the comfy egg chair and looked out over the open back yard. The grass was vividly green, swaying slightly with the light breeze. Woods encroached the perimeter, thick with leaves and underbrush. Anything could be out there, adding to the mystery and awe it inspired. 
You draped the throw around your shoulders and then sat in silence, watching the sunset. Soft blues were chased out of the sky by pinks, oranges, and the softest purples blending into the pitch black sky. 
Stars winked on as if there were tiny caretakers igniting each one. Your mind spun with idea after idea, but these you would let pass. Not everything had to be about writing. Some things just needed to be experienced. 
The tea kept you warm as the temperature dropped more and more. When your nose got too cold and you sniffed one too many times, you finally packed it in and went back to cleaning. Your playlist kept you upbeat as you cleaned out the bathroom.
Done with everything, you finally felt comfortable enough to shower. Scrubbing the day away with your favorite soap nearly made you ascend to another plane. You giggled to yourself as your mind spun once more, crafting a whole silly scenario just because. 
You sighed. You needed a man. Well, okay, ‘needed’ was a strong word. But you were giving up comedy gold over here. There should be someone around to witness it! Then again, did you really want to explain your quirks to someone? 
You shook your head. You were not here for all of that. You were here to get some much needed writing done away from your family and friends. You knew they meant well, but it was almost pathological with the way they relied so heavily on you. 
As much you knew that they loved you, you also wondered if they even saw you as a human being with your own interests. They knew you needed to write and yet they came bursting in anyway, calling, texting, bugging to no end. You were tired of explaining that you weren’t rejecting them, you just needed to focus on writing. 
Either they truly didn’t get it or they willfully ignored your needs. And you just didn’t have time for that. When your editor, Vanessa, suggested that you made enough money now that a writing retreat was well within your budget, it was like a wake up call. 
Of course. The solution was right there. You immediately hopped on Google to determine which place called to you more. You always wanted a winter writing escape and a few keystrokes later, you were on your way with your family scratching their heads. 
You dried yourself off in the bathroom and lotioned yourself up. You left the bathroom in a cloud of scented steam. You opted for a pair of panties and an oversized red T-shirt that reached down to your knees. The place had central heating but you didn’t want to turn it up too much. Just enough to warm the wooden flooring.
You spent the next hour making tacos, the heavenly aroma of meat and salsa making your mouth water. You cleaned as you went, not wanting to spend the next morning doing dishes. The cabinet below the sink squeaked and you debated telling Mr. Omar about it. It was something small but if you were going to be there for a while, you’d rather not deal with the inconvenience. Ehh, it was small. No need to bother the man for that. 
All done, you brought your plate to the living room and camped out, finding something to watch. You had been hearing so much about that show called Rivals on Hulu so you decided to watch it. When the first episode started, you screeched at the TV. It literally opened with someone joining the Mile High Club. 
For the rest of the night, you relaxed and zoned out. It was hard for you to truly relax, to truly turn your brain off and just enjoy something. But practice made perfect, so practice you will. 
When you yawned for the fifth time in two minutes, you finally gave up the ghost. You turned everything off and put up the food you made. Then you turned everything off as you headed down the short hallway to the bedroom. 
It was pitch black inside. Perfect. You only used your bedroom for sleeping and fucking. It signaled to your body that enough was truly enough. No distractions, no connections, nothing to prevent your body from sinking into sleep. And it worked every time. 
You crawled into the comfy bed, soothed by the familiar smell of your bedsheets. Your brain blissfully shut up and you fell into a lovely, dream-filled sleep. 
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You woke up naturally early in the morning. The white curtains in this room were heavier than what was in the rest of the house, allowing limited lighting to reach the bed. Plus, the sun didn’t shine on this side so the added shade soothed your overworked eyes as soon as you got up. 
This…you sighed. This was what you needed. You felt so good having true silence for once. No one around, no one bugging you, no one bringing you into their drama, no one leaning on you, no one calling you. It got to the point where you were beginning to hate the sound of your name. Too many people used it to demand your attention, demand your time, and then curse you in the same breath when you retreated and wanted to recharge your mental batteries.
This would likely have to become a tradition. From now on, you would have to choose an Air B&B to get the first draft over with. At least after that, you had the idea out of your head and you could cobble it together among the noise of your demanding family. The brainstorming stage was the most crucial; you could not afford distractions.
You were itching to write but you knew that you needed to eat something first. You got up from bed, scratching beneath your bonnet as you picked your way down the short hallway to the other side of the house. 
A heavy boot clanged on something metal, drawing your attention to the kitchen where a tall man dug through your cabinets. You screamed, hopping in place from foot to foot. The man turned around with a jump revealing…a pretty face.
You ran towards the fireplace and grabbed a poker, brandishing it like a spear. “Who the fuck are you?!” You demanded, pulling your shirt down. Fuck. You should’ve worn pants. Well, no, fuck that, he shouldn’t be in your place! 
The man lifted his hands and revealed a screwdriver in his hand. “Wait, hol’ on,” he said. His deep voice was unexpected, sounding like a crack of fire on a cold, wintery night. 
You moved the poker around in the air, looking around for any other men that may be lurking. The cabin was small enough, the kitchen not too far from the living room. But, besides the bathroom, you could see everything at a glance. You looked out of the windows anyway, searching for any other cars or trucks outside. 
“I’m Mr. Omar’s handyman. He asked me to fix the cabinet,” the man said. His scruffy facial hair framed his symmetrical face and hid his lush lips. His eyes were intense, the color of a storm right as it kissed the ocean, and his eyebrows arched severely. He was unreal. But hot or not, he was still a stranger.
His eyes drew down to your legs and you tugged on your shirt as if you could conjure more material. “You think I’m going to buy that? What are you really doing here? You read his mail?” You asked.
You hadn’t seen any mail laying around the place when you cleaned the day before, but that didn’t mean anything. Maybe he dug through the trash or hacked Mr. Omar’s emails.
The man sighed and shook his head. “You watch too much TV,” he said. 
“And you need to answer my questions. Who the hell are you?” You asked. 
The man kept his hands up but lowered his elbows. “I’m the handyman,” he said, putting emphasis on the word as if that helped. “Terry.” 
You squinted at him as you looked around the living room for your phone. You had plugged it in before you went to sleep, but it was hard to look for it and keep an eye on the man. 
He watched you and tilted his head. You scowled. Was he just humoring you? If that motherfucker tried anything, he’d lose one of those perfectly sculpted eyes. 
You snatched your phone from the end table besides the couch. You held the poker up as a deterrent but the man - “Terry” - didn’t move. He watched you, hands up, calm as a cucumber. If he was a thief or a rapist, he was the worst one you’d ever seen. Or maybe he was the smartest. 
You sized him up as you dialed the homeowner’s phone number. “We’re gonna see about you, nigga,” you said. You brought the phone to your ear as Terry smirked. 
“I’d believe that more if your voice wasn’t so squeaky,” he said.
“I do not have a squeaky voice!” You yelled.
Terry smirked again, tilting his head as if you just proved his point. “Can I put my hands down?” 
“No,” you said. Mr. Omar didn’t answer on the first ring so you tried again. 
“Just like a chipmunk,” Terry said. Terry sighed and then leaned against the nearest sink, making you look at the full length of him. He wore dark wash jeans, heavy tan boots, and a black hoodie. He also wore a cream colored beanie pulled low over his head. It ought to be a damn sin to be so fine.
“Hello?” Mr. Omar’s accented voice came on the line. The subtle African pronunciations made you curious about where he was from but you were too chicken to ask. 
“Mr. Omar! There is a man in the rental claiming to be your ‘handyman’,” you said, managing to give Terry air quotes around the poker. 
Terry smirked and licked his lips, drawing attention to them. They were so pink and big. The more you paid attention to his features, the more striking he became. He looked like a painting made real. Or like one of those artist renditions of Egyptian royalty. 
“Ah yes, Terry-Terry. Good man,” Mr. Omar said. 
You sighed and turned your head. “What does he look like then?” You asked. 
The poker grew heavier now that Mr. Omar vouched for the man. However, you weren’t ready to lower it just yet. 
“Tall and like Mufasa,” Mr. Omar said. 
You snapped your eyes to Terry, comparing him to a lion. Nah, he was more like a Scar to be honest. But still, the image wouldn’t leave your mind and your thighs responded, tingling with awareness. 
You scowled at Terry who pressed his lips together. “Can I lower them now?” He asked, amusement written all over his face.
“Where’s your ID?” You asked. 
Terry sighed. “I’m not handing over my ID to a chipmunk,” he said.
You squeaked with an indignant huff and Terry shrugged his shoulders. “Is that all you need?” Mr. Omar asked.
“Why didn’t you tell me he was coming by?” You asked. You lowered the poker down by your waist, business end sticking out in case this Terry character wanted to try you. 
“Forgive me, my memory. I’m an old man,” he said. You rolled your eyes. He was far from an old man, in his early fifties and looked young enough to be a senior at college. The man kept himself fit and in shape, telling you all about his fitness journey during the many conversations you had about the property. 
“Right. Thanks, Mr. Omar,” you grumbled and hung up with him. Okay, so the man was legit. But that didn’t explain why he didn’t ring the doorbell. 
“I didn’t know anyone was here, I’m sorry. Just let me fix a few things on my list and I’ll be out your hair,” he said.
“Can’t you come back when I’m…” you trailed off and clicked your mouth shut. You were going to tell him to come back when your getaway was over but he didn’t need to know your timeline. He could swing back around and murk your ass. 
“When you’re done gathering nuts to hibernate?” He asked.
“Fuck you, I’m not a chipmunk,” you said, smiling despite yourself. 
Terry lowered his arms and then made a show of putting the screwdriver down. “Do I get to know your name?” He asked. 
You debated giving him even that much, but the manners that were drilled into you refused to let you be rude. You tugged on your shirt and his eyes followed the motion. His focus was…unnerving. You cleared your throat and told him your name. He repeated it one more time and you nodded, a tingle going up your spine at the way he rolled the syllables around with that slight Carolina accent. 
“Nice to meet you. Now that we’re good, can you point that somewhere else?” He asked.
You sighed and rolled your eyes. “Like you were even scared of it,” you said. You placed the poker down on the coffee table. The metal clinked against the glass top but your eyes were glued to Terry’s.
Terry chuckled and shrugged his shoulders. “You and your mouseketeers are s’posed to be good at fencing,” he said.
“You know what! You get on my damn nerves!” You said and laughed, giving in to his bad jokes. 
“Can I do my job?” He asked. 
You were still wary about him being in the house while you were practically naked. You glanced away from him, looking at how far the bedroom was. “How many things do you have to do?” You asked.
“Mr. Omar left me a honey-do,” he said. 
You sighed. You didn’t like this one bit. You hadn’t planned on having a visitor while you got into the rhythm of things. But you also didn’t want this man to come back. Though…that wouldn’t totally be the worst thing. 
You licked your lips and looked between him and the bedroom. You didn’t want to linger on him but fuck, it was like one look wasn’t enough. Every time you looked at him, you noticed something different about him. 
“Tell you what. I’ll spread it out. I’ll only do a few things at a time. Deal?” He asked. He held out his hand, beckoning you to come closer. That was how all horror movies started. The devil himself smirked at you and you scowled, understanding exactly how Eve broke. Had you been her, you wouldn’t have stopped at just the apple. 
“Deal, I guess,” you said. 
Terry lowered his hand and nodded. “Deal. You won’t even know I’m here,” he said.
Riiiiight. “Just…stay out here. I hear a boot coming down the hall and it’s game over,” you said.
“Yes, ma’am,” he said, making his accent thicker. The mischief in his eyes made you scowl harder. But his eyes dropped lower and lower and you pulled on your shirt. 
You made a beeline to your room, slammed the door shut, and sighed heavily. This was unreal. Absolutely unreal. 
You grabbed the nearest pair of sweatpants, yanked it on, and then took a few more deep breaths. You listened for any sense of movement, any creak of the floorboards, or sound of breathing. When there wasn’t any, you cracked open the door. 
You headed towards the kitchen to find Terry exactly where you left him, bent over the cabinet as he fixed the hinge. At your approach, he stopped and looked sideways at you. His side profile was lethal, jawline sharp enough to cut glass. 
Your belly flipped and you held it like it was a traitor. As if it could give you away. You breezed past him and grabbed your laptop off of the kitchen island, clutching it to your chest as you carried it to the living room and curled up in the corner of the couch. 
From this angle, Terry couldn’t sneak behind you and you had a full view of him as he worked. You opened your laptop and opened up your notes for your latest novel. You had the major plot ideas down but you needed to flesh in your characters.
As you researched, adding pins on Pinterest for inspiration, you couldn’t forget that Terry was there no matter what else you did. 
He moved with grace like he was completely in tune with his body. The delicate way he held and used the tools drew your attention to his long, thick fingers. Every so often, his tongue stuck out of his mouth as he worked, screwing the bolt down or digging for another screw. He was a distraction and a half. 
“You need a picture?” 
You gasped as you blinked, coming back to reality. Terry looked sideways at you, his eyes low and sleepy-like. 
Wow, your thoughts were not holy. You mentally slapped some sense into yourself. This man was a stranger. A very fine, gorgeous stranger, but an hour ago, you thought he was going to kill you. Be so real right now.
“What?” You asked.
“You were staring,” he said.
“Was not,” you said and sat back on the couch.
“Was to,” he said, testing the cabinet by swinging it back and forth. It didn’t squeak so Terry dropped into a squat to investigate the cabinet below the sink. The stretch of the squat revealed a gorgeous ass to match.
That was it. The man wasn’t real. He had to be conjured from God’s own imagination. God was just showing out when he made Terry and it wasn’t fair. All that fine piece of meat…
Speaking of, you added “piece of meat” under your male character’s profile in your notes. “For your nosy information, staring off into the distance is part of my process. If you happen to step into my line of sight, that’s on you,” you said. 
“That right?” He asked and you could hear the humor in his deep voice.
“Uh-huh,” you said. You typed a few more notes, taking in tiny details about Terry. The slope of his shoulders. The curve of his brow. His high cheekbones. Your male character came together more quickly in your mind now that you had a model to work off of. 
The cabinet squeaked, breaking you of your thoughts. “It’s singing the song of your people, you know,” Terry said. 
You sucked your teeth and Terry chuckled. “Me and you are going to fight,” you said. 
“I got a ladder if you want to use it,” he said. 
You rolled your eyes and pinched your lips together. He was really going to make you scream. “Are you always this annoying?” You asked.
“I can be worse,” he said. 
You stared off into an invisible camera. You could hear the laugh track now. You shook your head and decided to ignore his shenanigans. You fell into a comfortable silence somehow, typing away as more and more ideas came to you. It was no longer weird that there was a strange man in the cabin. Despite being so big, he had an uncanny ability to take up as little space as possible. 
“What are you working on? You a writer or somethin’?” He asked. 
“Yeah, what gave me away?” You asked.
“The laptop,” he said.
You sucked your teeth and hid your smile behind your hands, pretending like you were suffering the sting of a thousand cuts. Terry chuckled. “I know you want to laugh,” he said.
“Do not,” you said and moved your hands, settling on a smile. That was all his fine ass deserved. 
“You write anything I may have read?” He asked. The hinge on the cabinet knocked against the wood as Terry pried it off with the screwdriver. His hands really were huge and you briefly wondered what it’d feel like wrapped around your ass. 
You pressed your thighs together and adjusted yourself on the couch. This man was proving dangerous afterall. One meeting with him and you were picturing disgusting scenarios to write. 
“Umm, no, my books wouldn’t be your speed,” you said. 
“I like nature though. I’m sure a chipmunk survival guide would be right up my alley,” he said.
“The door is right there,” you said, chuckling. He truly got on your damn nerves. But you wanted to hear more. His voice was smooth and deep, a weakness for sure. Your voice kink was in hyperdrive, teasing out every way he sounded out words and syllables to be replayed later in your mind. 
“C’mon, what do you write?” He asked. He glanced at you briefly before returning to replacing the hinge. He dropped to his knees as he worked, putting him in a position to arch his back. 
Mm, mm, mm. You eye-fucked him as he leaned forward, holding the hinge in place while he screwed in the first screw. He leaned back to dig into the tool box by his feet and you looked away, heat flashing over your skin. 
You did not know this man. You did not know this man. You did not –
“Not gon’ tell me?” He asked. 
“What happened to not knowing you were even there?” You asked. He was worse than your folks at home. If you wanted to be harassed, you would have saved yourself the money. 
“You’re the one staring,” he said.
You took a deep breath to keep from cussing. Maybe it was his face. Maybe he was too pretty to yell at. Or maybe he was so pretty it spurned you to want to hit him. Because as much as you wanted to smack him, you wanted to smack his ass even more. 
Sweet fuck you needed to get laid. Maybe you’d redownload that dating app your friends made you download after your last book. You deleted it because apparently, guys took offense when all you wanted was sex from them.
“I write books,” you said, chickening out at the last minute. It wasn’t exactly easy to tell people that you wrote explicit shifter romances. Urban fantasy settings let you have the best of both worlds. Modern technology combined with fantasy and magic, blended together, and created something that scratched all of your itches. 
“What kind of books?” He asked.
“Paperbacks,” you said.
Terry chuckled and shook his head. “If you don’t say, I’m going to start guessing,” he said. 
You groaned and Terry chuckled at your theatrics. You held up your hand. “Please, spare me. If you must know, I write romance novels,” you said. 
“Romance novels…like the ones where the guys have a forty inch dick, eight feet tall, and long flowing red hair?” Terry asked.
You howled with mirth as that image was now seared into your brain. “Ew, yuck! Why! Why would you make me picture that?” You asked when you had enough air in your lungs to breathe. 
“I’m just shooting the shit. That’s wassup though,” he said. 
“Thank you,” you said slowly, full suspicion. Terry chuckled but didn’t say anything further as he continued working on the cabinets. 
You went back to your brainstorming, filling in details about your female main character. You searched for her fatal flaw, the lie she told herself in order to survive before the meet cute with the main male character. 
You sighed. You ought to give them names. But you were not prepared to deal with the ads on Nameberry or clicking endlessly on name generators. But you couldn’t very well keep calling them ‘female main character’ and ‘male main character’. 
You brought up Nameberry first in the hopes that you’d find something quicker using the alphabet lists. A Q name would be cute. Qianna? Ugh, there weren’t many cute Q names. 
“I didn’t know writing could be so hard core,” Terry said.
You looked at him over the top of your laptop with a scowl. “Are you almost done? You’re stinking up the place,” you said.
Terry chuckled and shook his head. “I’ll finish out the cabinets and come by tomorrow for the shower and air filters,” he said.
“What’s wrong with the shower?” You asked. The way he said it…he could make even the most innocent words sound naughty. Because now, you were thinking of the shower. And him in the shower. And all those suds dripping down his naked body…
“Water bill is going up. So Mr. Omar wants me to check for a leak,” he said. 
You hadn’t noticed anything but you weren’t a professional handyman either. “How’d you come to be here, Terry?” You asked.
Terry slanted his eyes towards you. “Curious about me?” He asked.
You rolled your eyes. “I could go back to ignoring you,” you said. 
“I’d believe that if you weren’t staring so much.” 
You took a deep breath and Terry waved you off. “I’ll stop. I got into some deep shit a year back. I wanted to take my mind off it by being as busy as possible. Working with my hands relaxes my mind,” he said.
You nodded. You could respect that. “You live around here?” 
“Mr. Omar has another spot up the ways. I work on his properties and I get to stay for free,” he responded. 
You sighed wistfully. The things you would do to be able to have an arrangement like that. Only without the handyman part, because fuuuuuck that. “Your family doesn’t miss you?” You asked.
Terry took a measured breath and paused briefly inworking. He then screwed in the final screw and tested the cabinet door, no squeak to be found. “Naw. Not really,” he said quietly. 
Duly noted. Shutting up. This was why you weren’t that social. You had a particular knack for picking up on shit people didn’t want to discuss. You hid behind your laptop screen, hunting for more names for your main characters. 
Gabrielle was always a cute girl name to you. Now for the perfect boy name…Rashad…Theo…Wesley? Wesley and Gabrielle? That sounded kind of cute together. You put it on the list of maybes and continued hunting for different pairs just in case. Though each one you found didn’t spark as much interest as Wesley and Gabrielle. 
“I’m done for the day. In case you had a change of heart,” Terry said.
“Nice try. I didn’t get any work done because of you,” you said. 
Terry smirked, eyes crinkling in the corners. “Then my job’s really done,” he said. 
You groaned playfully and put your laptop down on the coffee table. You had pants on now but you still felt exposed. Like you were still standing there half-naked. Terry’s eyes tracked down your body as if he recalled your bare legs as well. 
You weren’t stupid. You knew he had a passing interest. But what man wouldn’t after living up in the mountains of North Carolina? You doubted he was starving for female attention and you had a book to finish, come hell or high water. Pretty distractions like him did you no justice.
You’d just have to pull out ole reliable, Laz Alonso. Thinking of that man already had you hot and bothered and the vibrator you brought with you would have to be more than sufficient to get you through the winter. 
You approached Terry cautiously as he packed away his tools. You openly stared at his backside as he closed the tool box and stood up to his full height. He was so damn tall. Guys like him just didn’t exist in real life. It wasn’t fair.
Terry walked to the front door ahead of you. You kept some distance, not wanting to give him a chance to get too close. Your alarms were still on high alert though he did a good job of putting you at ease.
As he crossed the threshold, your stomach rumbled. Loudly. In all the excitement and hubbub, you forgot to grab food. Terry turned to the sound, stopping a few feet from the front door. 
“There’s a bar down the mountain if you ever want to get out the house,” he said. 
You pinched your lips. “That doesn’t sound too bad. But maybe not today,” you said and leaned against the door jam. The cold air blew into the warm house, instantly raising goosebumps on your arms. 
Terry nodded. “You change your mind, let me know,” he said. “And if you notice anything that needs fixing, definitely let me know.”
You smiled. The thoughts he conjured…”Thanks, I truly appreciate it. But how would I let you know?”
Terry chuckled. He nodded towards the kitchen. “I left my number on the fridge. Need anything, just call.”
You glanced back towards the fridge and saw a few sticky notes on it. You turned to him and nodded. “I’m glad you turned out to not be a creep.” 
Terry nodded. “I’m glad you take your safety seriously. Most people don’t. Lock up after me,” he said. 
“Yes, sir,” you said, deepening your voice. 
Terry huffed a laugh and shook his head. “Can’t hide that voice, sorry,” he said. 
“Shut up! And get home safely, Terry,” you said. 
Terry took the steps down fast and then spun around to walk backwards. “Worried about me, chipmunk?” 
You rolled your eyes. “No, I’d rather not explain to Mr. Omar why his handyman couldn’t finish around the house,” you called out to him, raising your voice the further away he walked. 
He waved to you, making it to his truck parked a ways in front of the front door. It was a big blue truck with a larger bed than most you’ve seen. It suited him though. And his rugged appearance. He didn’t strike you as the type to drive a luxury SUV and complain about his shoes getting soaked through from the snow.
You went back into the warm house, shut the door, and locked it behind you. You tapped on it once, turning away with a smile. Now…down to real business.
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True to his word, Terry came over nearly every day for the next two weeks fixing things around the house. He managed to find a way to annoy the ever loving hell out of you, but he also made you laugh so hard, you nearly snorted tea out of your nose. 
You found inspiration with the little things he did or said. Until “Wesley”, your male main character, started to move and sound like Terry in your mind. You would feel bad, except there was no chance in hell Terry would ever read this book. Ever. 
The beginning came together smoothly in your mind. Wesley, the too-serious wolf shifter investigator, was married to his work, only going home long enough to eat, shower, and sleep. Gabrielle, the famous tech genius by day, was also a major thief by night. And as a surprise to no one, Wesley didn’t know he was investigating Gabrielle’s latest crime, the theft of a magic orb from a private collection. 
Now…where could they bump into each other… a blind date sounded interesting to you but nothing too easy. Nothing too cliche. Hmm…grocery store? She stumbles upon him after shift? Maybe it’s a full moon and he protects her? 
You groaned and backspaced. You were thinking too hard on this one. This one wasn’t coming together in your mind. You looked back over your character descriptions; maybe there was something there to spark interest. 
Heavy boots stomped down the hallway from the bedroom as Terry had taken a look at the closet door. So many broken hinges. What were people renting this house for? Parties where they pretended to be animals, swinging from the ceiling? 
You snorted at your own joke just as Terry entered the living room. You looked at him and stopped laughing but Terry raised an eyebrow. “Don’t stop on my account,” he said. 
He chose a dark gray hoodie this time, the same cream colored beanie, and dark jeans. His toolbox was held loosely in his big hands, and your body flushed with heat. Lost in the brainstorming fog, you hadn’t had a chance to play with Laz and your body reminded you of that. Painfully. 
“All done in the bedroom?” You asked.
Terry eyed you and you blinked innocently at him. Even as his eyes made your pussy flutter. Down girl, down girl, DOWN girl…
“Done. Unless you found something I need to fix?” He asked. 
You squinted at him but for once, his face was unreadable. You couldn’t tell if that was supposed to be a double entendre or not. Maybe you were just a horny mess. You’d have to look at your period tracker to see if you were ovulating. Because at the moment, you were one step away from asking that man to fix your dripping pussy.
“No, no, no, no. All good,” you muttered. If you couldn’t get some, then at least you could write the filthiest things for Wesley and Gabrielle. As soon as you figured out how they meet. 
Terry moved into the kitchen, setting his toolbox down. “I’ll check the windows. There’s a storm moving up here in a week or so. You good on firewood?” He asked.
“I can’t just use the heater?” You asked. 
“What if the power goes out?” He asked.
“That really happens? Or are you trying to scare me?” You asked. Well damn. You didn’t have the power going out on your list of tragedies that could happen while you were out here. You knew it could happen but it was rare that you experienced it. One of the pitfalls of staying in someone else’s place. You didn’t have all of your emergency kits. 
There was one in your rental car but that was inadequate as hell. You sighed. Fuck. You were going to have to venture into town anyway. You glanced at your laptop. You had the major story beats fleshed out, but filling in the rest was giving you a headache behind your eye. 
Still, you itched to keep going after it with a hammer. You wanted to keep pushing yourself and see if you couldn’t solve your problem. It was like you just weren’t feeling this one for some reason, despite being overjoyed at the sexy idea.
“Not trying to scare you,” he promised.
You pouted. “I haven’t tried lighting a fire yet. So I don’t know about the firewood,” you said, feeling like you were five years old for not checking something so crucial. But! You would give yourself grace. You didn’t know before but now you’d make it a point to check everything before venturing off to la la land in your head. 
Terry nodded. “I’ll check then,” he said. 
“Thank you. Really,” you said.
“My pleasure, chipmunk,” he said with a chuckle.
“You get on my damn nerves!” You yelled after him as he left the house with a booming chuckle. You shook your head as you waited for him to return. 
Though this was meant to be a retreat for you, to explore on your own without the watchful eye of your family, you kind of liked having Terry around. He managed to pull you from your spiraling about your writing in the nick of time. You were able to return to your novel with a second wave of inspiration. 
But this meet cute was kicking your Black ass. Like this should have been the easiest part. But it was often the easiest parts that tripped you up the most. 
Terry reentered the house, kicking his shoes on the mat before stepping inside. The door banged shut behind him, a strong wind passing over you before dispersing in the warm house. 
“Firewood’s low. After it thaws a bit, I’ll chop more,” he said.
Mmm, Terry…chopping wood…mm, mm, mm. You had to go on a date with Laz tonight. Maybe a little post nut clarity would work in your favor. 
“Thanks. Is there anything I can get you from the store? I’ll need to head down the mountain after all,” you said.
“Road may be slippery right now. You’d be better off going tomorrow,” he said. He pulled his toolbox closer and flipped it open. 
You placed your laptop on the coffee table in front of you and then stood up, letting your inside throw blanket slip from your shoulders. You stretched, your limbs and back popping in some areas as you twisted one way and then another. 
You crossed closer to him, going towards the kitchen for a cup of tea. If you were going to brave the outside world, you’d need a little help. As the kettle warmed up on the counter, you faced Terry and leaned against the edge. 
How to put this without sounding batshit crazy? “It’s important for me to go today,” you said. “Preferably before the sun goes down.”
Terry scrunched up his face. “Is there a special vampire version of chipmunks I don’t know about?” 
“You get on my nerves!” You said and giggled. Terry smirked with you as you giggled and you slowly quieted down. You cleared your throat. “No, it’s just important. I do take my safety seriously. Maybe more so than most.” 
Terry eyed you with those beautiful eyes of his before nodding. “Alright, I’ll take you,” he said.
“Wait, what? No, no, no, that’s not what I meant. I can get down myself,” you said. 
“No one said you couldn’t. But the roads really can get slippery if you don’t know where to look. The snow doesn’t stick to the ground like it used to and it can make driving those twisting roads more dangerous.” 
You put your hands on your hips and stepped closer, nothing but the narrow corner of the kitchen island between you. “I don’t need a babysitter, Terry,” you said. 
Terry held up his hands. “I’m not a babysitter. I’m a handyman,” he said.
You pinched your lips together to keep from smiling. He was truly going to make you put him through the wall. 
“I wouldn’t feel right letting you go down the mountain by yourself. Not that you’re not capable. But because the roads really are that dangerous. And I’d rather not have to come dig your ass out of a ditch,” he said.
“Ouch,” you said, picturing just that scenario. The roads seemed like a twisty maze, full of sharp corners and narrow lanes. Driving up when the roads were clear in the morning hadn’t been that much of a hassle but you weren’t too sure about going back down. It was why you tried to bring as much stuff with you as you could, to avoid that exact circumstance.
“Go get dressed,” he said, his voice deep and commanding. 
You prickled. “Don’t tell me what to do,” you said. Did he hear the breathiness in your voice? Because holy hell. That voice needed to boss you around more often.
Terry lifted his sleeve to look at his watch. “Daylight’s wasting,” he said.
You scowled. “I’m getting dressed because I decided to and because I concede that I don’t know these roads that well. Not because you told me to,” you said. 
“Yes, ma’am,” he said, eyes dancing with mischief. Ugh. You bet he ran his mama ragged growing up. 
The kettle clicked as it was done, the boiling water settling down. You poured a mug full and took it with you to the bedroom and sipped it while you got dressed. 
You opted for a simple pair of jeans, boots, and your favorite purple hoodie. You didn’t know how Terry didn’t walk around with a jacket as well. Every bite of air you felt outside chilled you down to the bone. 
Leaving your bedroom, Terry eyed you up and down before jerking his head for you to follow. You locked the door behind you and then followed Terry to his truck. Your combined footsteps crunched on the snow underfoot, leaving footprints that quickly disappeared in the gentle snowfall. 
You looked up towards the sky, grinning at the overcast sky. Flurries floated down, landing on your cheeks, eyelashes, and lips. You licked away a snowflake that landed on you and looked towards Terry, smiling softly at you.
“You must think I’m silly,” you said.
“Not what I’m thinking,” he said. You stared but he didn’t say anything more. He just smirked and held open the passenger door for you. The truck was bigger up close and you had a hard time holding onto the door and climbing in.
“Here,” Terry said, gently sliding his hands around your waist. You looked over your shoulder at him. He was close enough to see how pretty and long his eyelashes were. It wasn’t fair that he was pretty down to the individual hairs on his lashes. 
His big hands felt like heaven on your hips as he helped you lift into his truck. His hands slid from your waist and you missed the heat of it instantly. Terry cleared his throat and then closed the door. 
You eyed him as he rounded the front of his truck, climbed in, and started the car. He turned the heater on full blast and before long, you were headed down the mountain. The type of road you were on was paved and everything, but every so often, you’d hit a patch of woods on the side of the road and there were guard rails to prevent you from toppling over.
Terry took the turns slowly, but expertly. Your eyes were drawn to his hands every time the steering wheel slipped through his fingers while he turned. He kept his nails trimmed and clean, causing you to bite your lip, thinking of him fingering you. 
No, you stop that, you chastised yourself. He was not a piece of meat. But sweet fuck, the packaging was pretty.
“How’s the writing going?” Terry asked.
“Huh?” You asked. You heard him, you just needed more time to let your brain get off nasty mode. Though, who were you kidding? It stayed nasty. 
Terry repeated his question. He took a long turn that caused you to lean against your seatbelt. It dug across your chest and you moved it to a more comfortable spot. 
“Good. I think. I can never tell. But I’m still trying to figure out how the characters meet,” you said.
“It’s that important?” He asked. 
You nodded, though he didn’t see because he was being a good driver. He kept his eyes faced forward, driving carefully down the road. Every so often, the woods would break and there would be someone’s property, full of horses or cows. You marveled at a large brown cow hanging out just because. 
“The meet cute is one of the most important parts of the book. It sets the tone for the relationship,” you said.
“Yeah? How so?” He asked.
“Are you sure you want to hear about all this? You don’t have to be polite,” you said, giving him an easy out. 
“I like listening to you,” he said.
Oh. You smiled, looking down at your hands in your lap. You launched into the nitty gritty of romance writing. The less glamorous side of it. It took you a long time to learn when to linger, when to skip ahead, and when to let the characters give into the chemistry. You weren’t always sure you pulled it off, but your sales were steady so you’d take it. 
Terry listened the entire time, asking more and more questions to feed his curiosity. He still threw in teases about your voice, the subject matter, and your little smut buddies, your writing group that talked about sex all day long. 
He pulled the truck into a plaza with a few different stores spread out. “You’re gonna tell me guys don’t talk about sex all day? Why’s it a problem when women do it?” 
Terry pulled into an available parking spot and turned the car off. The chill from outside immediately crept in, forcing the warm air to evaporate. “Sure, but we don’t write it down or send porn to each other,” he said.
“We do not send porn!” You said. Liar, liar. You had sent a porn link to your group chat earlier to discuss the inspo for Wesley. 
Terry gave you an incredulous look before getting out of the truck. Your heartbeat sped up as he walked around to your side. His hands would be on you again. You liked it. Perhaps too much, because when he opened the door, you jumped. 
“You good?” He asked.
You nodded, not trusting your voice. Terry steadied you by the waist as you climbed out of his massive truck. When he set you on the ground, your hands lingered on his forearms. Realizing you were holding on, you hummed and stepped away with a smile.
You went shopping, picking up essentials for a quick emergency kit. Flashlight with extra batteries, bottled water, granola bars with a long shelf life, back up portable chargers for your phone, extra over the counter meds, first aid kit, whistle, Lysol wipes, hand sanitizer, paper soap, and matches. 
Terry’s eyebrows rose with each new item you picked up, working off your memory of your home and work kits. So you liked to be prepared, so what. You were only mildly embarrassed as he walked with you down each aisle, adding in things you hadn’t thought of for snow weather. Extra thick socks, thermals, extra scarf and beanie. Just in case. 
“Thank you, Terry, really,” you said as Terry helped put the items in the bed of his truck. 
“You can thank me by swinging by the bar with me. I’m pretty hungry. You?” He asked. 
You grinned. “Was this your plan all along?” You asked.
“Maybe,” he said and smirked. Ugh. He was too fucking pretty. It made you sick really. Sick with fucking lust. Maybe a drink was just what the doctor ordered. 
“Fine. But you could have just asked, you know,” you said.
“I know.” After he helped you in the car, he made the short trip to the bar he told you about.
The parking lot was large but mostly empty. It was nearing the evening and the temperature dropped bit by bit, your breath escaping in clouds. Terry escorted you up the long wooden stairs towards the earthy bar.
Inside, the place was bigger than you expected with two distinct sections. On the right, there were dining tables set up for bigger groups. Some of those tables were filled up and there were TVs stationed around turned to various games. 
Terry said hello to the staff as he escorted you to the left, where the main bar was set up. The tables on this side sat higher off the ground and it had bar stools pushed close to the table. There was a door that led out onto a patio for outside dining but no one sat outside at the moment. 
Terry pulled out a bar stool for you and helped you climb on. He effortlessly sat, his long legs having no trouble touching the ground. Bastard. 
The bartender, introduced as Adam, came around to take your drink orders. “I am a cider girlie. What’s good?” You asked Adam.
Adam stroked his silky salt and pepper beard and looked behind him. “We got a few things. How you feel about blueberry?” 
“Blueberry cider?” You asked.
Adam grinned. “If you don’t like it, it’s on the house,” he said. Adam leaned forward on the bar top and you smiled back. Oh, he was adorable. 
Terry cleared his throat. “How’s Melissa?” Terry asked, bringing a beer to his lips and sipping. 
Adam’s smile didn’t waver. “She left me. I’m all alone in my modest, but spacious house,” Adam said, never taking his eyes from you.
You giggled and waved him off. “Oh stop!” You said. 
“With a beautiful woman like you, how can I?” Adam asked. 
Terry made a sound that sounded suspiciously like a growl. You side eyed him as he shared a glance with Adam. Adam knocked on the bar top with a grin and then moved away to grab you a blueberry cider. He popped the top for you and waited for you to take a sip.
It was…actually delicious. You nodded. “Okay, not bad, Adam,” you said.
Adam’s permanent grin spread wider. “I aim to please,” he said. 
You hid your giggle behind your hand and shook your head. “Did Melissa really leave you?” You asked. 
Adam groaned and looked at Terry. “Thanks, T. Yes, she really did. But only to visit her parents. I still needed to work,” Adam said. 
“Aw, why’d you get stuck with holiday duty? You piss off the boss?” 
“He is the boss,” Terry grumbled. 
You smiled at him. These two. “I bet ya’ll get into so much trouble together,” you said.
“Too much. And it was always Terry’s idea,” Adam said. 
“Fuck outta here,” Terry said and chuckled. Adam launched into a story about growing up with Terry, running around like the latch key kids they were. Adam had dared Terry to jump off a rock formation near a creek which got both their asses handed to them by Terry’s mama. 
You laughed through the story, Adam an amazing storyteller. Terry filled in details grudgingly, pulled from him the more Adam kept going. 
Your food arrived in the middle of Adam speaking. You ordered tiger sauce wings and the chicken was huge. It came with fries and you immediately dug in, your hunger taking over something vicious. 
Adam finally left you two alone as Adam had to tend to more and more people as the night dragged on. 
“Your friend is funny,” you said. 
Terry grunted. “But he doesn’t get on your nerves?” He asked. 
“Nope. Guess you bring it out of me,” you said. 
Terry rolled his eyes but dug into his own steak and potatoes. You both lobbed questions back and forth, learning more about each other now than over the two weeks he fixed minor things around the rental. 
You downed cider after cider, getting lost in the way Terry told stories. He had a slower approach than Adam, but he was no less engaging. With that voice of his, he set the scene perfectly as a narrator. 
The cider warmed you from the inside out, making your face flush with heat. But it was Terry’s voice that had something else flushing as well. Your pussy fluttered every time he licked the corner of his mouth while he spoke. 
It ached every time you spoke and his focus was completely on you. He didn’t blink away, he didn’t look down, he didn’t interrupt. It only highlighted how much you craved that. Your family and friends only had so much patience for you before they were off, dominating the conversation in ways you couldn’t actively participate in. It felt more like they just wanted someone to talk at, not with.
Not the case with Terry. He included you in the conversation, stretching it, and flowed effortlessly from one topic to the next. There was rarely a lull in your conversation and your heads dipped closer and closer together the more you spoke. 
The crisp apple and blueberry taste coated your tongue but also loosened your lips. “I see it all so clearly in my head, but then I get too much in my head, and it all comes crashing down. I can’t connect with this one for some reason,” you said. 
Terry had asked you more about novel writing, the concept completely foreign to him. He confessed that he didn’t think that much effort went into it. Maybe not for others. But for you, it felt like you agonized over every single word. Were you true to the characters? Did anything make sense? Would it hit for others like it hit for you? 
“Why’s it not connecting for you?” Terry sipped his second beer, as sober as a judge. While you felt too relaxed. 
You sighed and looked away from him, peeling the label off of the bottle with your nail. “No offense, but men. I usually have a man to play with while writing to keep the inspiration going but sex-only arrangements only work if the guy initiates it. If I tell them I don’t want anything more, that’s when they get in their feelings,” you said with a shiver. 
Terry’s grin spread slowly across his lips, revealing a neat row of teeth. Oh, my. He was damn delicious. “So you treat them like a ho and they get mad?” 
“Yes!” You tapped his shoulder. Finally, a man who got you. “Like ugh, I know what I want and it’s not these dudes I find. I won’t settle for anything less than what I write about on the daily. So no, I don’t want to date, a girl just wants to get fucked, you know? No talking, no giggling, just work me over like a screen door in a hurricane and then get the fuck out,” you said. You nodded your head to emphasize your point. 
You sighed deeply and smiled at Terry, your eyes drooping. You were a little tipsy. Terry lifted an eyebrow and then your words echoed in your mind. Your jaw dropped. Oh god. You were mortified. 
“I-I am so sorry. That was so rude,” you said.
Terry lifted his fingers in a small wave. “Naw, you’re good,” he said.
“No, wow. That was inappropriate. I’m sorry. I-I’m sorry. We should go, please,” you said. 
Terry turned towards you on the bar stool. “There’s nothing to be sorry for. I’m the one that asked, chipmunk,” he said. 
Your cheeks were still on fire. It was one thing to talk like this with your girlfriends or your sister, or even your writing group. That was normal. But you talked with Terry as if you’d known him forever. It took you one business year to make friends, putting them through the gauntlet to see if they’d actually stick around. More than that to let your freak flag fly. 
“If you truly want to go, we will. But I promise, we’re cool. You don’t have to censor yourself around me,” he said.
And somehow, that permission made your shoulders droop from around your ears. You nodded, taking a sip of water. You didn’t have to apologize for being true to yourself. And it was like you crossed some invisible social boundary with Terry. Conversation flowed more smoothly, your heads dipped closer together, and your shoulders brushed against each other.
“So what are you looking for then? If not these dudes you meet,” he said. 
You spent the rest of the night diving into past dating history and what you looked for in a partner. Terry shared what he liked as well. Someone that laughed at his world-stopping jokes, someone kind, and someone goofy.
Instantly, you compared yourself to the small list of women he’d been with. The traits he looked for. Did you fit the bill? Were you someone he could shove through the mattress? 
It seemed wild to think about that even though you already swore him off. It wasn’t that you weren’t interested. You were too interested. Too aware. Too conscious of him. Of the way he moved, talked, or laughed. You anticipated what would make him smile, what would make him groan, or what would make him roll his eyes. 
He was hands down the only man that could make you lose your marbles and you hadn’t even taken him to bed. The thought filled you with so much dread and fear, that you had to push him away to stay sane. You had to keep him firmly on the other side of the brain before your inner romantic started planning your wedding in your mind.
You could easily fall for Terry Richmond. And you weren’t sure if you were strong enough to survive if he couldn’t. Not in the way you wanted. Not in the way you craved. Not in the way you wrote about, book after book, story after story, chasing a phantom man in your mind that loved you in the way you hungered for. 
Adam called last call and gave Terry the sober vibe check. Which consisted of Terry holding his middle finger to nose while standing on one leg for a minute. You laughed at the sight, instantly taking a picture because there was no chance in hell you wanted to forget the look on his face. 
He flipped you the bird while he settled with Adam and then escorted you outside. The wind was bitter, biting through your jacket and hoodie. Terry stepped closer to you, taking the brunt of it as the wind came from his direction.
You joked on the way to his truck, nudging him every so often as you walked. The liquor loosened you both up, navigating the newfound familiarity together. Whether it was by intention or by accident, the touches were not unwelcome.
At his car, you leaned against the truck. You nudged your chin towards the bar. “It’s a great place. I see why you wanted to show it to me,” you said.
He leaned a hand against the car, blocking most of the wind. But it had the added benefit of bringing him warmth closer. He smelled delicious like the outside air he belonged to. Like pine needles and cinnamon. 
“Figured you might. Did it help with your book?” He asked.
You gasped. “Was that the goal?” You asked.
He shrugged. “A little. I figured you were too in your head,” he said.
“You think you know me, Terry Richmond,” you said and tapped his chest. He rocked back on his heels as if it actually hurt him and you rolled your eyes.
“No. But I’m learning to,” he said.
You giggled nervously as you blinked up at him. Light from the signs on the bar barely reached, but it highlighted him from behind. Light cut across his jaw and cheek and made his lashes glow at the tip.
Terry stepped closer, giving you all the room to step away or block him. But that was the last thing your body wanted. You stayed put, sliding your hands against his broad chest. Your fingers curled around the fabric and he sighed. 
He brought his face closer to yours and inhaled. You hummed just as his lips pressed against yours. There was nothing hurried about it. Nothing filthy or salacious. But it warmed you from the tip of your toes to the top of your head. 
Terry drew back and looked you in the eyes. You didn’t need to say anything. Didn’t need to share anything. You supposed kissing him was inevitable. Fated. 
Terry tucked you into his truck and his hands lingered, reluctantly letting you go only because you were seated and there was nothing to help with anymore. You smiled at him and he finally closed the door. It gave you enough time to let loose the breath you held as he walked around.
He drove carefully back up the mountain. Snow had stuck to the road in some areas, so Terry went extra slow to be careful. If it weren’t for his huge lights, you wouldn’t be able to see a got damn thing.
It was pitch black outside, as if the world had disappeared during your ascent. As soon as the headlights passed on to something else, the darkness encroached and gobbled it back up. It was trippy. Yet strangely called to your inner emo. 
The ride was mostly silent, soft music playing on the radio too low for you to pick up words. Terry found your rental without a hitch and came around to let you out of his truck. He walked with you to the front door and hovered outside of it while you stepped in.
You put your head on the door, swinging back and forth. In a minute, Terry would have to fix that one too. You giggled at your joke and Terry smirked.
“What’s so funny, chipmunk?” He asked. 
You told him and Terry groaned and shook his head. “That was a terrible joke,” he said.
“What! No it wasn’t!” You squeaked with your outrage, sputtering for the right words to defend yourself. You could call your jokes bad, he couldn’t. You didn’t know why just yet, but he couldn’t. 
“Was to,” he said and stepped closer. Terry’s eyes drooped as he leaned his shoulder against the door frame. He took up the majority of it, so large and imposing. Yet his energy was nothing but peaceful and quiet, setting you at ease in a way only a thorough cleaning could achieve.
“Was not,” you said, holding your ground. You wanted to invite him in. Wanted to go ahead and explore what he started.
Terry sighed and dug his hands in his hoodie pocket. “Goodnight, chipmunk,” he said. 
Oh. You matched his sigh and rolled your eyes. “Good night, Terry,” you said. You’d have to think of a good nickname for him. Like Big Bird…Clifford…whenever it came to you, you were gonna hit him with it. 
Terry stepped back and waited while you closed and locked the door. You heard his boots travel down the steps and into his awaiting truck. 
You leaned your back against the cold door and sighed once more. If you were a chipmunk, then the only tree you wanted to climb was him.
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“Girl,” you said, drawing the word out.
“Girl, what?” Your best friend, Whitley, asked. 
“This motherfucker out here chopping wood on Christmas Eve,” you said. Terry stopped by a week later, finally coming around to chop more wood for the fireplace. You had forgotten all about it, feeling better now that you had an upgraded emergency kit.
But then Terry took off his hoodie, revealing a silver blue T-shirt that really brought out the blue in his eyes. He blamed the storm, criticizing you for not paying more attention to the weather channel.
Um, and miss bingeing Alex Cross for the umpteenth time? Yeah, no thanks. You called him an old man while he grinned and went outside, round to the side. There was a tree stump there and a small pile of chopped firewood. 
Terry took the larger, whole pieces and went to work. Some he cracked in one go, his powerful muscles bunching and contracting with the effort. The axe was decisive, snapping and echoing in the surrounding woods. 
Terry used the hem of his shirt to wipe the sweat from his brow and you got a front row seat to his abs. 
You moaned into the phone and Whitley grunted. “Girl, uh uh. Put me on video or something. You can’t be moaning like that and I don’t get to see too.”
Fair, she was right. You hurried and put her on video, tilting the phone to look at him through the window. Though he faced forward, he rarely looked up while he worked on the firewood as if it stole something from him.
You bit your lip, needing that same focus while he fucked you stupid. You wanted to be fucked so hard that you forgot your ABCs.
“Oh damn,” Whitley said, moaning with you. 
Lord, he was fine. This so wasn’t fair. Not even in the slightest. “And you ain’t rode that big dawg yet?” Whitley asked.
“Girl, no. Look at him. He would snap my ass in half and then eat my heart on his way out,” you said. 
Terry took a break, lodging the axe in the tree stump. He wiped his forehead with his shirt once more and you and Whitley sighed in appreciation. Wisps of his breath clouded in the air, sunlight shining brightly on Terry. 
“I say this with all the love in my heart. You stupid ho, go ride that man!” Whitley yelled into the phone. Since she was on speaker, you ducked in case Terry looked towards you. He didn’t need to see you being a creeper. 
When you deemed it safe, you slowly stood back up. Terry stretched his thick biceps, causing his shirt to ride up. His belly peeked from underneath, giving you a glimpse of his belly button. You felt no better than an 18th century man but your core was in full agreement. Your clit throbbed, painfully. His tattoos poked out from beneath his short sleeves and you wondered what the story was behind each one. 
“Now what if he looked over here? Now we both looking stupid ‘cause you don’t know how to shut up,” you said. 
Whitley giggled and sighed. Terry picked up the axe and continued chopping. He leaned forward, grabbing a whole piece, and then placed it on the stump. He hefted the axe above his head and let it fall with force behind it, splitting it in two. 
“Got damn. Maybe I need to visit you up there, friend,” Whitley teased.
“Um, no,” you said.
Whitley giggled. “Then if that’s your man, go get him!” 
You grumbled to her, listing off reasons why you absolutely shouldn’t. But night after night, little Laz Alonso wasn’t cutting it. Ever since the bar, ever since the kiss, you hadn’t been able to keep him from your mind.
It was his face that you stroked yourself too. His voice that you moaned to. His eyes that set you off but it was empty. Sure it felt good, but you needed more. You needed the heft of a man on top of you, splitting you open, talking nasty in ya ear.
Spicy audios and a vibrator just didn’t have the same effect. Not when you wanted some body heat. When you wanted the rough scratch of a beard on your skin. Fingers buried to the knuckle. 
“What am I gonna do when he get me addicted to that monster in his pants and I can’t have no more? You really want me out here like a crackhead, begging for dick? You wanna come bail me out of jail because I was banging on his door at 3am?” You asked.
Whitley howled with laughter as you kept going, describing all the ways Terry would have you acting out of character. And you wouldn’t feel a lick of shame about it. You’d stand outside buck ass nekkid in the cold, brutal winter if it meant you’d get to hop on it again. 
“Stop, my stomach hurt! Stop it!” Whitley yelled in between pulls of air. 
You finally giggled with her, eyes still on Terry. The pile of wood next to him grew more and more and you wondered how long he expected this storm to last? Or if he had that little faith in the central heating. 
Terry glanced towards the house and you ducked, heart in your throat. “I think he saw me,” you whispered. 
Whitley giggled and shook her head. “How you gonna explain that one?” She asked. 
“I’ll tell if you if works,” you said. You hung up with her and then grabbed two bottles of water from the pantry. 
You threw on your hoodie and jacket, leaving the house. You slid-walked towards the side of the house, the snow giving way and making you earn it. You huffed as you made it around the side.
Terry stopped chopping and watched you struggle. He lodged the axe into the stump and then placed his hands on his narrow hips. The silver blue T-shirt clung to his body with sweat. If he were to wring it out, you’d bet it’d fill a bucket. 
When you got closer, Terry lifted an eyebrow. “You know chipmunks s’posed to hibernate in the winter,” he said. 
“Oh shut up,” you said, shaking your head. “I saw you struggling so I decided to come give you the break you needed.”
You handed him the bottle of water and then unscrewed your own. “Saw me struggling, huh,” he said, his voice deeper than normal. Or were you imagining it? Fuck. You were losing touch with reality now. 
His eyes slanted towards you as he tilted his head back and gulped down the bottle of water. He didn’t stop for a breath. He kept going, his Adam’s apple bobbing with the action. His bicep could probably crush steel. Veins ran down the length of his arm and saliva pooled in your mouth. 
“That’s a lot of firewood,” you said, your voice unnaturally rough. You cleared your throat and drank your own water. 
You finally figured out how Wesley and Gabrielle meet so the rest of Act 1 flew from your fingers. You made it to the part where they have sex for the first time and Gabrielle would discover that Wesley was an investigator. 
You’d had sex on the brain all day. A little obsessively so considering it was Christmas Eve. So Terry being out here, looking like that and chopping wood like that... It was like a cosmic nudge in the pants to ride him ‘till the cows came home. Your resolve weakened the more you spent in his presence. This was why you needed to stop listening to Whitley’s ass. 
“Want to make sure you’re prepared,” he said, his accent seeping through his words. 
You drank more of your water, shivering as a brutal wind kicked up. “Oh, that’s cold,” you said. Was that the universe telling you to take your ass in the house? Surely, it would be on your side, telling you to keep your eye on the prize and not fuck the incredibly hot handyman. 
The wind blew again, the cold light of the sun disappearing all together. You looked upwards. Clouds rolled across the sky as the temperature dropped ten degrees. “Fuck,” you shivered, rubbing your arms. 
Terry scowled. “The storm’s early. Go get inside,” he said. 
Overhead, trees swayed violently with the gathering wind. “What about the firewood?” You asked.
“I got it,” he said. He waved for you to go ahead of him but you didn’t want to just leave him to do all the work. He moved carefully, heading to the side of the house and grabbed a blue tarp. He jogged to the stump and loaded the tarp with firewood. “Go get inside!” 
“It’ll be faster if I help,” you called back over the wind. 
You ran towards the stack, helping him load it with the firewood he chopped. He scowled but he couldn’t argue with you once you started. In no time, you had it loaded with as much firewood as he could move. 
He pushed you towards the house, pulling on the tarp and dragged it across the snow. Snow flurries kicked up and swirled around you as you ran-slid towards the front door. Terry was hot on your heels, huffing, clouds of breath in front of him. 
You held onto the railing as you jogged up the steps, already knowing Terry wouldn’t want you to help with the wood. He gathered up all four corners and lifted with his knees, carrying the tarp up the stairs like it was nothing. 
You opened the door, the wind doing most of the work. The door banged against the wall and Terry stomped in after and dropped the firewood. “Close the door,” he said and went back outside.
“Wait!” You called after him. He kept walking so you did as he said, closing the door behind him. You had to push against the wind but you finally managed to close it. You looked outside of the window beside the door. 
The snow blew around hard and fast, obscuring visibility minute by minute. You could barely make out Terry’s outline as he ran to his truck and opened the bed. He pulled out a bag and then closed the bed of the truck, locking it behind him. He jogged towards the front door, holding his bare arm up as he did so. 
A second later, he opened the door, entered, and then closed it behind him. He shook himself out, flinging snow across the entrance. “I’ll clean that up,” he said. Water clung to his scruffy beard and plastered his shirt to his body. His nipples poked out and you dragged your eyes away. 
“You need to get in the shower, now,” you said.
“What?” Terry asked and his eyes went wide. 
“The last thing you want to do is get sick. Go warm your body up in the shower. I’ll throw your clothes in the dryer,” you said. Your words sunk in a second later and then you giggled. “I mean, leave your clothes outside the door, obviously.”
Terry smirked, his eyes crinkling in the corners. “Yes, ma’am. Thank you,” he said. He nodded towards the fireplace. “You know how to start that? We should conserve power tonight, just in case.” 
“I agree. But no, still haven’t learned how to start it. You go get in the shower, the heater will be fine for now,” you said. 
Terry looked like he wanted to argue, pinching his lips together. But then he shook his head and took off towards the bathroom. He peeled off his shirt as he went and you bit your lip. 
Sweet fuck, that was not what you meant! Got damn. Your eyes widened as you looked at the dip in his back. The expanse of shoulders. The tattoo on the back of his right arm. Sweet fuck, almighty. 
Terry looked back at you as he went into the bathroom. He ducked to enter and then shut the door behind him. He caught you staring. He so, so caught you staring. A beat later, he opened the door and tossed out his shirt, jeans, and socks. Not his underwear though. Bastard.
You put the items in the dryer and let it run for a cycle. You closed the closet doors on the other side of the kitchen and then started up a kettle. Your fingers tapped on the countertop waiting for the water to finish.
All the while, the shower was loud through the walls. On the other side of it, Terry was showering. He was naked. He was running soap all over that massive, long body. Your panties grew so damp, you wondered if you had enough time to dry them before he got out of the shower.
You needed all the strength you could muster. Because right now, you couldn’t remember a single fucking reason why you couldn’t hop on Terry’s dick. Really, what was the price of heartbreak? A wild ride in the sack? It just may be worth it for Terry Richmond. 
The shower turned off just as the kettle clicked off beside you. You jumped and then closed your eyes. You were an adult. You could keep yourself in check. 
You poured some tea for yourself but you weren’t sure what he drank. You didn’t like beer so you didn’t have any in the house. You weren’t expecting any visitors. 
Wind blew against the window making you jump once more. You were too hyperaware. Too attune with every little noise or screech.
You retrieved his clothes from the dryer and then knocked on the door. Terry opened it a crack and you made sure to keep your eyes on his face. Nowhere south. “Clothes,” you said.
“Thanks,” he said. He opened the door wider and grabbed his clothes from you. His fingers grazed yours and you gasped. He was so soft and warm. Steam poured out the room, fanning across your face. He smelled like your soap and you bit back a moan.
“Yup,” you squeaked and then left him to it. Tea, tea, all you needed was some tea. Some sleepytime tea to do the trick. But you weren’t sure how you were going to sleep with a storm raging outside.
You hated to admit it but your winter getaway turned out to be anything but idyllic. And you had a teensy, smallish, not even worth mentioning fear of storms. It was the bigness of it. The fact that it made you feel so tiny, so insignificant, so aware of your mortality. That nature was the foremost authority and you lived and breathed by its good graces. 
It was an annoying feeling to you as a writer. You created entire worlds at whim. Played with characters like dolls. But you held no such power in real life. 
Terry left the bathroom, his footfalls softer now that he wasn’t wearing boots. Freshly dressed in his warm clothes, he looked younger without his beanie. He sported a mini, curled afro atop his head. It gave him a mountain man sort of look, like he would be at home out there in the woods. 
“Thanks,” he said. 
You nodded. “I wasn’t sure if you were into tea,” you said.
Terry waved you off. “Water is fine,” he said. He moved over towards the living room and opened the tarp on the floor. He knelt on one leg as he worked on stoking a fire to life. The flames gathered traction, flicking orange and yellow light across his features. 
You rolled the bag of tea around a spoon to squeeze excess water out. Then you doctored it how you liked, adding in cold water. You grabbed a bottle of water and headed to the living room as Terry finished with the fireplace.
Terry accepted the bottle, drinking down half of it while he turned off the main heater and sat on the other side of the couch. 
“Looks like we’re having a sleepover. Did you plan this too?” You asked.
“If I were powerful enough to control the weather, I’d use it for more nefarious purposes,” Terry said.
“Like what?” You asked, your curiosity piqued. 
Terry chuckled. “And give up my evil plan? Naw. I ain’t grow up on a chicken farm,” he said.
You laughed and shook your head. “What?” You asked, chuckling more. 
Terry laughed with you. “Chicken Run?” He asked.
“Shut up, you ain’t seen that movie,” you said.
Terry scoffed. “Bet,” he said.
“What’s the young rooster’s name?” You asked.
“Rocky, try again,” he said.
You squinted at him as you thought of your next question. Something only a true fan would know. “Who was the first chicken to go through Mrs. Tweedy’s chicken pie machine?” You asked.
Terry sucked in a breath and widened his eyes. “Okay, tough. But it was Ginger,” he said. 
You looked at him and raised your eyebrows, trying to cast doubt on his answer. He matched your stare, smirk on his lips, and didn’t fold. 
“Okay, fine, you’re right,” you huffed.
Terry laughed and drank the rest of his bottled water. You fell into a comfortable silence, both lost in your thoughts. “I haven’t seen Chicken Run in a while,” Terry said.
“Me neither. We should see if it’s streaming,” you said. You turned on the TV and snuggled under your inside throw blanket. With the heat blowing across your legs, you felt warmer than the heater could ever achieve. 
Before long, you were both laughing at the shenanigans of the claymation movie. You both tossed out quotes, going back and forth about things you noticed in the movie. 
One movie turned to two, throwing on How the Grinch Stole Christmas. It was among your favorite Christmas movies and a perfect distraction against the raging storm outside. The wind knocked harshly against the window every so often, causing your eyes to dart to it and your heart rate to speed up. You hated being such a baby sometimes. 
But, giving yourself grace, storms really could be scary. If it knocked the power out, it could also knock over trees into the house or onto someone’s car. Storms were devastating and of course you’d find them a bit scary. 
Terry scooted closer. “You afraid of storms?” He asked. His voice was like butter melting over a freshly baked biscuit. You hummed and decided to be honest. 
“There’s so many things that could happen in a storm,” you told him. 
He nodded. “I got something to help with that,” he said. 
You turned to him and hummed for him to respond. He scooted closer on the couch, close enough for your shoulder to lean on his. You giggled at his solution. “Stop hugging the throw too,” he murmured and you giggled. 
“This helps storms, huh?” 
Terry nodded. “Hell yeah. Feel better?” 
You pinched your lips together but went on and nodded. “It has its merits.”
As you worked on Wesley and Gabrielle’s relationship, you couldn’t help picturing how Terry would be in a relationship. Would he be the perfect boyfriend? Would he be as annoying as he usually was, always poking at you? 
“Before we get comfortable, we should grab some drinks. I only have tequila or wine,” you said. 
“I’ll take the tequila,” he said, making a face. You laughed and rolled your eyes at him. You got up and went to the kitchen, grabbing your favorite tequila and two shot glasses. You turned off the kitchen light on your way back, bathing the living room in darkness. The flames in the fireplace flickered across the wall, still pumping out delicious heat. 
You poured a shot for each of you, clinked the glasses, and then drank. During the movie, you talked and joked, also quoting this movie back and forth. Terry’s laugh was so adorable and infectious. Was there anything on this man that didn’t scramble your brain? 
He breathed and you were ready to drop your panties and beg for his dick. You were not above begging. But your tongue stuck to the roof of your mouth. You wanted it too badly but you wrestled with your brain. You shouldn’t but you oh so wanted to.
“Can I confess something?” Terry asked. 
You turned your head to him. You had managed to curl into his side, soaking in the heat of his body. You felt every rise and fall of his chest. You licked your lips and Terry’s eyes drooped down. 
“What is it, Terry?” You asked. 
Terry licked his own lips and you couldn’t resist following the movement with your eyes. His lips were so big, so juicy. 
“I haven’t been able to stop thinking about our kiss,” he said. His voice was so soft, so velvety, that your shoulders dropped and you leaned in. 
“Me neither,” you said. You shook your head. The kiss invaded all of your senses, leading to distraction even when Terry wasn’t there. All week, you caught yourself veering off to replay the kiss over and over again.
“I haven’t stopped thinking about you since the moment you threatened me with a poker,” he said and smiled. 
Your chest rose and fell in waves, processing what he was saying. “Don’t play with me, Terry Richmond,” you said. You just couldn’t stand it if he were. 
“When you said what you said at the bar, I wondered what kind of man you’d take to bed. And then I started thinking that I wanted to be the only one in your bed,” he said.
Your mouth dropped open. It’s not that you didn’t know you were gorgeous. It’s not that you didn’t think you could pull someone like Terry. It was the fact that he said it so plainly. So openly. So clearly for your brain to not misinterpret his words. You didn’t have to guess with him. And that was one of the sexiest things ever. 
You blinked a few times. “I–”
“And then I started hoping that you’d let me audition,” he said.
“Audition?” You asked. What the hell was he on about? 
Terry grinned and then leaned closer, bringing his large hand to cup your face. His thumb stroked across your cheek. Your eyes slowly blinked closed, your skin tingling where he stroked. His warm breath fanned across your face, smelling faintly like tequila. 
He rubbed his lips against yours but it wasn’t a full kiss. And that made you want it more. You wanted his lips on yours. You would simply die without it. 
“Let me show off my skills. If I do well, you can use me as inspiration for your latest book,” he said.
You giggled, biting the inside of your cheek. “And what do you get out of the arrangement?” You asked.
“You,” he said.
You gasped, staring into his eyes. The low light made his features stand out more. It made his expressions more severe, more striking. You were at a loss for words. This man handed over everything you wanted on a silver platter.
You were so nervous to accept. You had been let down in so many ways by so many men. You had reached a point where you weren’t actively looking for a relationship. You didn’t need some raggedy boy in your phone. 
But Terry was a man. A huge, perfect, wonderful man who got on your last fucking nerve. He always had something smart to say or some new quip to lob at you. But he was also thoughtful. Kind. Funny. Sexy as fucking sin. 
“Are you sure? What if you don’t pass?” You asked.
“Then I’d like to keep trying until you tell me to leave,” he said. He licked your lips and you sighed, ending on a moan. 
“Okay, what will you do for your audition?” You asked. The tequila traveled straight south, making your pussy throb. Your inner thighs tingled even as your breathing increased. 
Terry smirked. He finally crashed his lips to yours, kissing you harshly, brutally. Like he had merely been caged before and you finally set him free. You brought your hands up to his neck, pulling him closer. 
Your moans combined and danced as you leaned closer, pushed harder, kissed back just as fiercely as he did. 
His hands moved underneath your shirt, hands wrapped around your sides, gripping onto your meaty flesh. You moaned, arching your back into him. Terry pulled you closer, made you straddle him. 
An impressive bulge rubbed against your core and you moaned, closing your eyes. Fuck, you were overstimulated already and nothing even happened yet. You knew he had a monster in his pants. You just knew it. 
You made out with Terry like a horny teenager, clashing teeth and biting at each other’s lips. You grinded in his lap, rubbing yourself against him. He groaned, hands lowering to cup your ass. He took two big scoops and squeezed hard, causing you to squeak.
“O-Oh fuck,” you moaned. The pain hurt so good. He kneaded your ass and you dropped your forehead to his shoulder. You moaned low, breathing harshly through your nose. 
“You are so fucking beatiful,” he murmured against your temple. 
“Terry, fuck, I’ve wanted you so bad,” you moaned. 
“Why didn’t you say?” He asked. 
You shook your head. You couldn’t speak. Didn’t want to speak. Your body moved on its own accord, rubbing against his hot erection. 
Terry moved one of his hands to grip your chin and force you to look at him. “Why?” He demanded. 
“You could break me. And that scares me,” you whispered. 
“How do you think I feel?” He asked. “You could rip me apart.” 
You crashed your lips to his, scratched at the nape of his neck. He returned his hand to your ass to squeeze, knead, and mold with his large hands. You moaned into his mouth, needing more friction. 
Terry grabbed you by the waist and pulled you off of him. He made quick work of your jeans, pulled them down your legs, and off in one quick snap. You squealed with laughter, at the physicality of him, yet he still remained sweet and gentle. 
Terry peeled your panties from your body and he groaned. “Fuck, you’re so wet,” he whispered, his voice one of awe. He slipped your panties off as well, biting your thighs as he pulled, and tossed it over his shoulder. 
Your pussy throbbed looking at the way he stared at the heart of you. The smell of your arousal permeated the air and you moaned, smelling how turned on you were. He pushed at your thighs until they rested against your stomach. 
He blew his breath across your pussy gently. “Oh, shit,” you twitched, hand reaching down to cling to his afro.
Terry groaned and blew once more, lowering his face until he was close enough to lick you from entrance to clit and back again. Your back bucked off of the couch, grinding into his face. 
Terry moaned and wrapped his thick lips around your clit. He suckled sloppily, licking you like a dog with its favorite toy. “Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit,” you moaned, your stomach caving in and your eyes rolling back. 
His tongue was the sweetest torture of pleasure against your pussy. His drool mixed with your essence, causing his sloppy eating to echo in the living room. “Fuck, that pussy good,” he sputtered against your sopping wet pussy. 
“Oh fuck!” You screamed, your orgasm tearing through you too fast for you to comprehend. You flopped on the couch as your body shook and twisted with pleasure. Terry kept eating, slurping up the latest wave of essence on his tongue.
His beard grew more wet, sliding against your skin. It tickled and you wiggled, trying to move. Terry locked his arms around your thighs, shoving his face further into your pussy. His nose tickled the top of your mound and you groaned and moaned, loving the attention but unable to stand the tickling. 
“Hmmmm,” he moaned, shaking his head. His tongue flicked across your clit without mercy, suckling on the swollen nub. 
“Shit! Shit! Wait! Fuck!” You panted. You were out of breath, hardly able to make any sounds as Terry continued to eat you like a starving man to bread. Your stomach caved in once more, your lungs refusing to work any longer. 
You pushed at his forehead but he kept going. Your eyes rolled backwards, your thighs clenched around his head as another orgasm tore through you, yanking your soul around like a ping pong ball. 
Your pussy clenched and unclenched, wanting attention too. “Fuck me, fuck me,” you begged. You loved that he was a munch, Loved, loved it. But fuck you needed to be filled up. You needed to feel him deep in it. 
“Not done yet,” Terry said. He came up for air, his face shiny with your juices. He licked his lips and closed his eyes, savoring it. When he opened it again, he narrowed his eyes. “Show me those pretty chocolate nipples.” 
Your belly flipped painfully. Pussy throbbed. You lifted your shirt slowly, giving him a slight tease. Your overheated skin tingled with awareness as the cotton shifted across your body. 
You revealed your titties and Terry groaned and rolled his hips into the bed. He winked at you. “Play with them while I eat,” he said. He returned to lapping at your pussy and your thighs squeezed around his face. 
You were too sensitive. You jerked with every flick, every suck, and every glide of his lips. Your thighs shook with passion, tingled, and tensed. But you managed to pinch and roll your nipples, squeezing in time with his licks. “Please, please, Terry, fuck! I can’t!” 
He pushed two fingers inside to pump in and out of your entrance. He wrapped his lips around your clit and used some kind of devil, voodoo magic to create a sucking vortex that had you seeing an entire galaxy behind your eyelids. Your mind flashed with dense clouds of pinks, violets, fiery oranges, and the softest greens. 
You lost all ability to speak as another orgasm was wrung from you. You bowed forward, pushing his head into your clit as you came and came with howls and screams loud enough to wake the dead. 
White and black spots danced in your vision as you suffered through aftershocks, ribbons of pleasure causing your nerves to go haywire. “Fuck, fuck,” you twitched. 
You didn’t have the words nor the presence of mind to process what the hell just happened. You were spent. Put out. Dangle you on the clothesline to air out because you were out of it. 
Terry came up for air with a growl, kissing your inner thighs, then your stomach, then climbed up your body to capture your lips with his own. He smeared your essence all over your face and you locked tongues with him eagerly. 
You tasted too good on his tongue. Smelled too good on his lips. “Did I pass? I get the job?” Terry asked in between kissing you stupid. 
You nodded and licked your lips, tasting more of yourself. “You got it, you got it,” you panted. 
“I don’t have a condom, but–”
“I’m clean and on the pill,” you said. You kept up with that shit religiously, setting an alarm and everything. You were too chicken to try any other methods. 
“I swear I’m clean,” he said, going back to kissing your lips. You moaned, and rubbed against his body. 
“Fuck me,” you whined. 
Terry chuckled. “Keep begging, chipmunk,” he groaned. He managed to continue kissing you while he ditched his jeans and underwear. His jeans dropped to the floor with a loud flop. His shirt went next, his muscles bunching as he lifted it off of him. 
He removed your shirt as well, hands coming around to grab your titties. He pushed them together, lowering his mouth to suck on both nipples at the same time. You jerked and whined, grinding on the couch. 
“Please, Terry, fuck me. Fuck me, I need it. I need your big dick to split me open,” you begged.
Terry groaned and moved his right hand between you. He rubbed his dick up and down your folds, gathering up all the slick he could to coat his dick. He pushed into your entrance and your pussy started talking. 
“Mmm, growl at me,” he moaned. “Fuck.” 
He dipped the head of his dick in and out of you, slowly, your pussy doing more than growling as he toyed with your aching hole. You cried every time his tip stretched you. He was easily the biggest you’d ever taken. 
Terry put his left hand on your chest and moved his right hand up to your clit. This thumb pressed on your clit and a strangled noise burst from your throat. “I need you inside me,” you whined. “Please, please.” Your eyes watered.
You were going to lose your mind in a minute. You would dissolve into a puddle of goo or start barking like a dog if he teased you any more. 
Terry moved his thumb in circles around your clit, causing you to sputter and moan, completely lost to the sensation. “Eyes on me,” he commanded.
Your eyes snapped open to him. To the softest gray and darkest blue of his eyes. His eyebrows curved in a severe arch. The same focus he had while chopping wood, he brought to killing you slowly from the inside out. 
His thumb made your pussy relax enough for him to sink in deeper, further, aided by the fresh slick leaking out of you. If it weren’t for the throw blanket, you were sure you’d have to buy Mr. Omar a brand new couch. 
“So wet. Fuck, you’re gripping my shit tough,” he moaned. He flicked his thumb harder.
You sniffled, tears running down your cheeks. “Please, I can’t. I can’t no more!” You yelled. 
Terry leaned down, pressing his lips to yours. You moaned and played with his thick tongue, licked his juicy lips, and gently bit his bottom lip. He moaned. “I say when you’re done,” he said.
“Oh fuck,” you said as you lost all control over your body. Terry pushed all the way down to the hilt with a guttural groan. Veins popped out of his neck as he used you to hold some of his weight. 
His dick throbbed, pulsed in time with his own heartbeat inside you. His dick pushed up against your sweet spot and before long, you were cumming on his dick. 
“Yes, yes, cream this dick. Show me you need that shit,” he moaned. He pulled back until he was almost out and then he shoved back in. He increased his strokes the more he did it, your pussy growling on his dick, while he rolled his hips. 
Your nails scratched at his chest as he moved his hands to either side of your stomach. The couch dipped with his weight as he pounded your pussy, punished her for whatever perceived slight against him. 
“Terry!” You screamed. 
“Scream it, baby,” he moaned. He pounded faster, nothing but wet, nasty smacks echoing in the room. Your pussy welcomed him in easily. He glided and fucked you to within an inch of your life. 
“Why you fucking me like this?” You panted. Your thighs were weak against his hips. He pounded so fast that the hair on his thighs created a slight burn on yours. The burn only seeped into your skin, driving your pleasure through the roof. The next one was gonna kill you. 
“Because you cum so pretty. Give me another,” he demanded. How many was his limit? How many would he pull from you? You were scared to find out. 
Tears ran in tiny rivers down your cheeks. The pleasure was too much. Too big. Too wild. Too uncontrollable and fuck, you greedily wanted more. Your head flopped from side to side. You didn’t have another one in you. You couldn’t give him what wasn’t there.
His head dipped to nip at your chin, your neck, and your breast. He suckled your nipple into his mouth, teasing it with his teeth. Like a wilted flower with fresh water, you came back to life. 
Electricity buzzed beneath your skin. Terry slipped out and then slapped his dick against your clit. Your pussy juices squelched and droplets bounced off. “Keep taking this dick like a good girl,” Terry moaned.
“Fuck, yes, Terry. Terry, Terry,” you moaned. 
“Cream that shit, fuck,” Terry moaned.
He fucked another orgasm from you. Your nails dug in hard enough to draw blood as you screamed with pleasure, your voice drowning out the roaring wind outside. Terry stroked three more times before finally releasing his nut.
He bathed your insides with hot, throbbing splashes of his cum. He jerked above you, head lolling from side to side as he rode out his climax. 
You both breathed heavily, bodies slick with sweat from the sex and from the still lit fire. You kissed each other with little pecks, needing air too much to lock lips. “Let me taste,” you said.
“Fuck,” Terry groaned. He slipped out of you carefully. You hissed as his glorious pipe slid out of you completely. His cum gushed out, pushed out by your pussy. You couldn’t stop clenching as you got onto your stomach.
You opened your mouth and looked at Terry. He stood up with one foot on the ground and one knee planted on the couch cushion. You gripped onto his waist and pulled him closer. Without hands, he made his dick jerk to attention, still fully hard. You took him in your mouth and hummed at the mix of your flavors. 
You relaxed your jaw and took him in as far as he wanted to go. You controlled your breathing as he gripped your head. He pushed you onto his dick, making you suckle the full length of him. Not all of it fit, so his dick started to poke against your cheek. 
“Lick it all up for me,” he said. His voice. His voice. He could command you to walk through burning flames and you would if it meant that he slutted you out like this every day from now on. 
You suckled him deep, your eyes never leaving his. You communicated without words that the final chink was in place. You were his. Locked in. Mind to mind. Body to body. Soul to soul. You were his to toy with, play with, his to do whatever he fucking wanted. Because you knew down to your bones that no one else would do it for you. No one else would be able to redefine the meaning of sex for you. 
His stare pulled you deeper and deeper into the pool of his eyes. Your eyes drooped as you let yourself get used. He thrust into your mouth, pulling your throat down on his dick. You gagged a bit and he moaned and jerked his hips. He lessened his strokes but kept up the pace. 
Saliva and his pre-cum mixed in your mouth and dribbled down your chin. Your gawking was loud and disgusting as you sucked him down. 
“You’re fucking perfect. Fucking perfect. Fuck, I’m finna bust,” he groaned, his chest rumbling with a growl.
His entire shaft throbbed as he held your head in place while he spilled down your throat. You swallowed his delicious cum, moaning at his taste. His eyes rolled back and you whined at the image. 
You suckled on his tip like candy and he stuttered with a chuckle. “Okay, okay, okay,” he tapped out, gently pushing at your shoulders. 
You giggled and then sat back and wiped your mouth. “Fuck. What the fuck was that?” You asked. 
Terry grinned. He leaned over, kissed you, and then sat next to you. He pulled you into his side, running his hand up and down your back. Your body felt more than relaxed. Floating on cloud nine in a way that you didn’t know was possible. 
“Ever since we met, I’ve been imagining what I’d do to you,” he said. 
“I love the way your mind works,” you huffed.
Terry chuckled and kissed your temple. “I’m just happy to be of service,” he said.
You tapped his chest. “I can’t stand you,” you said.
Terry rained kisses down the side of your face until he could nibble on your ear. “That wasn’t what you said earlier.”
“I cannot be held accountable for the shit I say while you’re balls deep,” you said, holding up your hand. 
Terry gripped your hand with a chuckle and brought it to his chest. He stared into your eyes and then kissed your hand. Then he moved your hand lower and lower, a grin spreading across his face. Your hand wrapped around his thickening dick. 
“Already?!” You asked. 
He shrugged. “Everything about you turns me the fuck on,” he said. 
Terry made quick work of putting out the fire. Then, he brought you into the shower to ‘clean off’. All he managed to do was haul you against the shower wall and dig into your guts once more, filling you to the brim with his searing hot cum. 
You dried each other off on the way to the bedroom before falling asleep as soon as your face hit the pillow. You smiled as you drifted off, the later half of your book filling in from your imagination. With Terry as inspiration, you had enough material to fill three books. 
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The next morning, you were on fire. Well, not literally, but Terry’s body heat ensured you never needed a heater or a throw blanket again.
Feeling you move, Terry woke up and kissed your neck. He was curled behind you, his large arm dropped across your stomach. He was too cute when he first woke up. Eyes blinking open. Licking his lips. Face fussy and scrunched up.
“Hm, good morning to you too,” you said, wiggling your ass against his morning wood. 
Terry chuckled and moved his hand to your waist to still your movements. “Don’t play with me,” he said.
You continued to wiggle your ass. “Well, it is Christmas morning. Don’t I get a present?” You asked.
Terry hummed in your ear. “What kind of present?” He asked.
“You,” you said. 
“It’s my pleasure to serve,” he whispered in your ear before lowering himself in the bed, beneath the covers. Your legs fell open as he adjusted himself in between and went to work, licking and suckling and nibbling around your clit and entrance until you were a ball of putty in his hands.
Incoherent nonsense spilled from your lips as he made you glimpse heaven two times before coming up for air. He kissed you, face shiny once more with your essence. You licked it off of him, licked the corners of his mouth, and suckled his bottom lip. 
Terry groaned, sliding into you with ease. “Nasty ass,” he moaned.
But fuck, he was still so big. So nasty. He pounded into you, giving you long deep strokes. He lowered himself closer to your body so that your nipples rubbed against his chest. 
“You fucking me too good!” You screamed.
Terry moaned and closed his eyes. He placed kisses all over your chest, neck, and lips, keeping pace. He carved a Terry shaped hole in your pussy and in your heart, one that he would only be able to fill. 
“Cum on this dick. Let me feel it,” he begged.
Your moans increased. Like his words were just what you needed. You clenched around his dick and he groaned, hips jerking forward, before you finally gave in and gave him what he wanted. 
“Shit, fuck,” he moaned as he came with you, dick twitching and pulsing. You would never get sick of that feeling. Never, ever, ever. 
“Merry Christmas, chipmunk,” he said, panting for air.
“Merry Christmas, Terry.”
Terry spent the remainder of your stay fucking you into oblivion. Every morning, you woke up with new ideas, new tweaks to make the story better and improve on it. The sex scenes, in your very humble opinion, were the spiciest things you’d ever written. Filthy.
When you shared some snippets with your writing community, they about fell out with gleeful gifs and unhinged keyboard smashing. 
Every night, Terry fulfilled his promise of giving you plenty to work with for your books. He twisted you in more ways than one. Folded you like a pretzel. Moved you in positions you’d never heard of. And each session left you so spent, your brain unplugged for the night. 
On your last day there, you spent it wrapped up in the bed with Terry only coming up for air long enough to snack. And then he’d call you chipmunk or give you The Look. The one where he dipped his chin and his eyes lured you in. 
Then you were kissing, touching, and exploring. Then your hand was wrapped around his dick and his fingers were buried in your pussy to the knuckle. You made it a game on who would cum first. You should’ve known you’d lose that battle. Especially when he commanded that you cum on his fingers with that deep voice and Carolina accent.
He would shove his wet fingers into your mouth so you could taste yourself while he fucked you from behind. Or from the front. Or from the side. 
The side was becoming a favorite because you could look at him while still giving him access to your ass. He would smack it and squeeze it. Then you would hold your ass cheeks apart so he could watch his dick disappear inside you. 
Then he’d make a show of licking his thumb and swirling it around your clit to set you off like a bottle rocket. Then you’d scream and scream his name and beg and beg for him to fill you to the brim one last time. 
Just one last time. You just needed to feel it soaking your walls one last time. Really, the last time. Because you did have to get on the road soon. 
You promised to find a way to spend time together. You weren’t that far from the rental and since he had his own cabin, it wouldn’t be so bad to arrange dates and fuck sessions.
You didn’t know what kind of Christmas miracle this was or who upstairs was looking out for you, but Terry Richmond was the best present ever.
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Merry Christmas, my loves! Love ya'll so bad!
The Secret Terry Richmond Files
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thoughtscout · 2 hours ago
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I agree that I am indeed concerned about skepticism surrounding the nature of someone else's sex, on the grounds that natural variations in biology can create factors that might make a woman appear more "masculine" in the eyes of society - and these traits are greatly stigmatized for the women who have them. height, greater amounts of body hair, breadth and muscle mass are all things that are targeted as being "unattractive" and "un-womanly" on account of them being stereotypically "un-feminine".
but isn't it interesting how the trans movement feels the need to constantly hide behind womens' natural biological variance, or even just gender nonconforming women, as if their existence only exists to protect the identities of males who identify as women? I've noticed that these days, people rarely seem interested in defending the existence of body-variant and GNC women, unless it's to prop up the fact that people who were born male are inevitably going to display some identifiably "masculine" bodily traits, even post-transition. we've hardly even worked on destigmatizing the existence of these "un-feminine" women, who are still widely looked down upon by most of society, and yet they are being used as a somehow "positive" voice for the trans community. why is that?
furthermore, isn't it also misogyny to imagine that there is a list of things a male can do to their body in order to make it irrefutably a "woman"'s body? things like growing long hair, wearing makeup, shaving body hair, taking estrogen to attempt to feminize features and develop larger breasts - all of these are marketed by the trans community as forms of "gender-affirming care." how exactly do these things "affirm" a sense of woman-hood, if a woman could just as well have short hair, wear no makeup, never shave, and have a "masculine" appearing body with a small chest?
I think something tremendously important to keep in mind is that you should absolutely be hearing alarm bells in your head if women (especially feminists) are being accused of harbouring and exercising somehow more misogyny than their trans movement counterparts. it's classic victim-blaming, a political silencing strategy that has been used since the first wave.
hence, I care little for 'transvestigators' who are men or position themselves on the conservative end of the political spectrum. their opinions don't greatly concern me. if I saw a woman questioning someone's unclear sex from a place of self-interest and/or a feminist perspective on the other hand, I would naturally want to advise her some amount of caution to prevent from jumping to conclusion. however, I think it does a great and frankly insulting deal of disservice to our assumptions of womens' intelligence to imply that she would be completely incapable of identifying someone else's sex based on visual cues.
it is honestly a little bit frightful that one of the default defensive positions trans activists tend to take is along the lines of "well, you can never really know what sex that person is," as if we're trying to just... essentially gaslight women into not being able to believe their own eyes, and what their own senses & knowledge are telling them. interpreting someone's sex based on visual, physical clues is completely natural, and is a normal and intentional part of human psychology. if a woman is in a vulnerable situation, or simply wants to set a boundary that keeps her within the presence of her own sex, she is entitled to do that.
the fact that there isn't a 100%, 10 times out of 10 reliable way to identify every single person's sex, doesn't mean that women shouldn't be allowed to know the sex of a person when it's important to her, or that sex is a completely neutral factor of someone's body that should be treated as completely irrelevant in every single setting and situation. maybe there are places in society where it should be more neutral, but certainly not everywhere, and we're a long way off from things being good, safe and equal enough where someone's sex doesn't matter whatsoever.
It’s wild to me to see transvestigator conspiracy theories online that could be so easily explained by natural human variation. That woman has a deep voice? Yeah, sometimes they do. A woman has broad shoulders?? Maybe she plays rugby or hits the gym a fuckton. There’s a “bulge” in her tight pants?? Maybe her vulva is just fat. All the “markers” of trans woman that transvestigators use to harass any woman aren’t even things unique to trans women.
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saixria · 21 hours ago
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The ICHBW live stream animatic is hitting me hard hours after the fact I’m not a crier but I’m actually tearing up. Now I can fully articulate what I love about Athena’s part. Athena’s character came together so well I love it and I think the visuals combined with a day more of thinking + discussing with friends really helped me better understand everything. Those last 90 seconds of ICHBW was the BEST PART OF THE ENTIRE SHOW. Ridiculously long Athena character analysis under the cut which quickly devolves into thematic discussion lmao
First of all, the expressions they have on the animatic makes it abundantly clear that ody and Athena weren’t separated. HER SMILE!! HER LIGHTNING SCAR!! ODYSSEUS’ EXPRESSION SOFTENED TO A SMILE AFTER GETTING OUT OF QUICK THOUGHT!! Odysseus definitely pieced together what she did for her right then, there’s no other reason for Jorge to show Athena showing Odysseus that scar otherwise. It’s like they immediately slid back into place like puzzles pieces even after 10 years. They’ve been changed in completely opposite ways. Odysseus the mortal has been turned to be less human, more ruthless, while Athena the immortal goddess has been turned to be more human, more empathetic. The latter partially because of Odysseus. Tbh Athena ever showing her face to Odysseus after My Goodbye and saying “I can’t help but feel like I’ve led you astray” is as close to an apology as it’s gonna get LMAO. The unresolved WOTM melody in the end is actually because their story together hasn’t ended, it’s because Odysseus doesn’t have to be her warrior of the mind anymore.
I once said that open arms is more than mercy, but treating the world kindly to lead to kinder souls down the road, to change the world for the better, and it holds true even more now. Odysseus is too tired for this. He’s just a man, he knows a better world is possible but he can no longer be a part of it. He can’t witness the better world in his short mortal lifetime, he just wants his happy ending with his wife. He doesn’t want to be Athena’s warrior of the mind anymore, and that’s ok. And yet, and yet he knows it is possible. He needs it to be possible, and he needs Athena to make it possible. Athena accepts it with a soft “very well”. That doesn’t mean they won’t ever see each other again, just that they no longer have that obligation of mentor-student, they’re just two old friends. They can rebuild their relationship slowly but surely with what they have.
Telemachus is the Warrior of the Mind now (AHHHHHH HIS ATHENA CAPE AND HELMET I LOVE HIS UPGRADE). From here, Telemachus and Athena are gonna truly fulfill Athena’s mission of “making a greater tomorrow” except it isn’t to turn the world more logical and ruthless like she once thought, but to make the world more empathetic and kind — she’s finally found what she was fighting for. Perhaps this is why the WOTM melody in God Games ended with Legendary — Telemachus is the new warrior of the mind. Odysseus fought for a world where his son can be safe and grow up kind and he succeeded in that. Far from war, Telemachus grew up able to afford kindness and empathy while also retaining the ability to be ruthless in face of obstacles — and now he can use this to change the world to Athena’s new ideal — where people held each other with more empathy — as Athena’s new Warrior of the Mind.
Athena’s verse existing is a sign of her reconciliation with Odysseus (in character might I add! I don’t think they’re the type to express their affection so easily, they know each other so we’ll that they just know), so instead her verse is there to expand on the show’s theme as I will be talking about next.
I absolutely adore the depth Athena’s ICHBW verse adds to the thesis of the show. I’ve always thought of epic as mostly being about how it was best to strive for a balance between ruthlessness and open arms, but circumstances only allowed Odysseus to become ruthless which was tragic, while different circumstances allowed Telemachus to be both. But it’s not just that. Sure it’s good to have a balance between the two ideaologies but what if we could make a world where ruthlessness wasn’t needed at all? What if we could be unconditionally kind and be treated with kindness in return instead of taken advantage of or hurt? Where, when given the choice between open arms and ruthlessness, people would choose open arms? It wasn’t possible for these characters, but it could happen someday in the future. If Athena and Telemachus can work towards that future so can we. So should we, considering we’re in a much better place compared to them. A friend of mine said this was a call to action to us in the present and I just. Have not been able to stop thinking about it.
Athena has always thought in “maybes” about her purpose. from WOTM to My Goodbye we’ll be fine to ICHBW. “Maybe one day…” -> “One day you’ll…” -> “maybe if I…” -> “what if…” it’s like she’s representing the future, the “greater tomorrow” of what could be, because as Odysseus said, she’s immortal and she will live to see it and change it. Circe saga has something similar — “Maybe showing one act of kindness leads to kinder souls down the road”, “maybe one day the world will need a puppeteer no more, or maybe one day the world will need a puppeteer more”. The connection of these hypotheticals “maybe one day” with a future world that could possibly be changed for the better by spreading kindness and open arms extends from Athena’s songs to There are Other Ways, one of the only times in the musical where, when Circe could choose between ruthlessness and mercy, she chose to show mercy and help them in hopes of spreading kindness to the world and making the world a slightly better place — aka a scenario that showed how unconditional kindness, “open arms”, could work, for kindness isn’t the inability to be cruel but choosing kindness even when you have the choice not to be. “Kindness is brave”, like Polites said.
Because of her immortality, Athena is the character who’s most connected to “time” in the musical with her time-related abilities like “time dive”, making people think quicker, having a domain essentially outside of time and space… She doesn’t just have a connection with the future but also the past. As someone who lives forever, she is the one who can connect the past, learning from past mistakes, to change the future: “To fall is to learn one way”.
Speaking of her connection to time, You can almost see that at one point Athena was the narrator of the story (see cut songs: full speed ahead demo and Ismarus) like Hamilton’s Burr: simultaneously an observer and a participant of the story. In the animatic of ICHBW she’s overseeing everything happening from her hour glass, wondering out loud from a meta perspective about the themes of the show, hypotheticals of what a different story, a different world could have looked like, and bringing everything to a close. It really feels like Athena is who’s gonna “live and tell their story” as per Hamilton, as always has been the case from burrthena narration days of Old Epic. She’s not just the bridge between the past and future but also between the story and the audience, by bringing up these themes on a meta level to directly tell the audience to make the world a kinder place, because we have the choice, unlike Odysseus who can only choose to accept his actions and move forward. Because she lives forever she can carry on their memories forever. She can keep telling their story over and over again to remind herself and others to change the world by showing empathy and open arms, and she will keep telling this story to us until ruthlessness is no longer needed in the world. The world where this is possible is not theirs but OURS. It is WE who have the chance to choose between ruthlessness and open arms and the show is telling us that, when we have this choice and aren’t forced to be ruthless, to always choose kindness and empathy. Like Circe, like Telemachus. So that we may impart some kindness unto the world and make it a better place.
“Maybe one day we’ll reach them and we’ll make a greater tomorrow then they’ll see I know we’ll change the world cuz we are the warriors of the mind!” — yes, they have reached us. We are all also warriors of the mind, doing our part to change the world for the better, to be kinder.
To me, one part of Athena’s character that’s never clicked for me was her motivation in WOTM. “Make a greater tomorrow” “we’ll change the world” why? How? What’s the point of including this in her song when it’s never come back up again? Now with the ICHBW verse, everything is tied up with a beautiful ribbon. She has always wanted to change the world for the better, and now she’s finally found out how — to spread empathy and Open Arms — and it’s inspired by the desire to help her friends, to prevent what happened to Odysseus from happening again, honoring him, just as how Odysseus tried to embrace Open Arms to honor his dead friends’ memories.
All in all, I’ve grown to genuinely really really like Athena’s verse in ICHBW. It’s so short but so effective at conveying so much. I hope that made sense bc it’s more a compilation of thoughts I had rather than a structured essay. Perhaps one day I will restructure this into a proper essay but not today for after all I’m- *gets shot
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goopgirlie813 · 2 days ago
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Fair, I guess. I see where you are coming from. 
From my perspective, the reason serial criminals like Dahmer get brought up is because it is the situation where prisons seem the most necessary. Like, at least temporarily, if someone is killing and raping other people they should be separated from society so they can't access victims, right? Even if just until they finish some form of rehab. And in my mind, none of the things you proposed seemed like they would actually deny serial criminals access to victims. Forceful detention, even just temporarily, seems in my mind like the most reliable way to keep someone like Dahmer from having an opportunity to reoffend. That's the key, opportunity to reoffend. I find it terrifying to imagine a society where someone can be caught and convicted and sentenced for horrific crimes and still have the opportunity to access victims if they want. I think that's what most people are trying to do with that argument. Not an infinite loop but an (admittedly poorly executed) expression of the fear that without prison people like Dahmer could just continue killing. Intuitively it seems like these people won't stop unless they are incapable of continuing and prison is an easy to understand way to make their reoffenses impossible. Its scary to imagine taking that away and reintroducing that possibility. 
That said, now that I've cooled off a bit I think I can better see why you are frustrated. You have been answering to the best of your ability but there have been layers of uncommunicated assumptions beneath the questions we were asking that we (or I, at least) didn't even realize were there. I thought I was being more straightforward than I was because I took for granted the ways your perspective differed from what I am familiar with. 
I assumed that it was a given that Serial Criminals need a forceful denial of access to victims in order to be adequately addressed and I also assumed that it was a given that prisons are the only way to guarantee that. The way it has always been presented to me, prisons are the definitive method of stopping a crime and those crimes can only continue harming the public if the perpetrator is outside of the prison. So follow that logic train, if someone won't stop reoffending you need to be able to draw a line somewhere by putting them in prison or else it will never end. Therefore, if you abolish prisons, some criminals will never and can never be stopped so we will be forced to accept the fact that we may be murdered or raped or whatever at any random point and there will be nothing anyone can do to stop them. (Except extrajudicial violence, of course, but that's really no way to run a stable society.)
And I'm sure you will see some glaring issues with that train of thought that aren't so obvious to me, but hopefully that makes it make a little more sense.
The key problem here, I think, is that we believe that some form of detention is the only way to definitively stop certain people from re-offending. Specifically for the scenarios where the crime is a serious danger to others, like rape and murder. We want a definitive solution to exist somewhere because if it doesn't then the mere existence of Dahmer types evokes a feeling of terrified helplessness, "what if we can't change them? What if there's nothing we can do to be safe?" 
Detention seems like the only truly definitive answer (or at least, the most definitive available) so what's really being asked is, "is there a point in which you will allow prison in emergencies or do you have a different, equally definitive way to stop them?" and no number of rehabilitation or reduction options listed will ever satisfy that question. There needs to be something that can forcefully prevent killers who want to kill from killing (or raping or stealing or whatever) in that time period between conviction and reform, or else we will never find complete prison abolition an acceptable option, no matter how much we support rehabilitation as the primary approach (as I do. I only argue for detention as an emergency back up plan for repeat offenders of horrific crimes, to keep them from hurting people if or until they can be successfully rehabilitated). Without that, it seems like a gaping hole, an oversight, a blind spot, a loophole for the worst of the worst to terrorize us without adequate consequence or barriers.
I was getting really frustrated that you were treating the "what if they reoffend?" question like a rhetorical trick because in my mind it was asking, "How do we prevent people who want and intend to kill us from actually being able to kill us?" (big fear for those in marginalized groups who face frequent hate and threats) but to you it seems it sounded like "how can we trick you into supporting prisons and admitting you're wrong?" And while you seem to have been trying to say, "I'm not budging on my opinion unless you can convince me that prisons are valuable," it sounded to us like, "so what if they kill people? Prisons fail too much anyway so letting them go on murder sprees really isn't any worse if you think about it. Allowing a little murder and rape here and there is just the price of a fair and just society." And while that probably sounds bonkers to you I hope it explains why you're getting the reactions you are. I mean, imagine how you would react if you thought someone was telling you that, if they couldn't just talk him into being a good person, they would have shrugged it off and willingly let Jeffery fucking Dahmer continue roaming free for the sake of "improvement" and dismissed his victims as collatoral damage. Not what you were saying, but the miscommunication sure as hell made it sound that way. In reality, we are all talking past each other and having two separate conversations and the same time without realizing it. 
(Hope I understood what you were trying to say correctly.) 
so yeah I apologize for making you pull out your hair, I've been doing the same. Hopefully this helps at least a little bit. Even if you still think we're being irrational and foolish for this position I hope it gives you a little more clarity moving forward.
Pretty sure @needabetternamelater has reblogged like 5 of my posts and then blocked me. So that's funny. But, just in case it's just a glitch that won't let me reblog those replies.
What do we do with rapists in a prisonless society? Well, 1. Fewer than 1% of rapists go to prison, so holding up prison as the standard that any other solution has to beat isn't hard. What do with do with rapists in a society with prisons? For 99+%? Not prison.
2. Prisons do not reduce the amount of rapes that happen. So again, prison fails pretty handedly at being both a prevention and a punishment. (It's a bit like arguing 'without the death penalty, what will we do with shop lifters?")
3. I've explain many times, on posts you've responded to, the variety of responses a justice system can have to any crime, including sexual assault. Mandatory counseling, restraining orders, restorative/reparation hearings, housing and employment restrictions, fines, caseworker check ins, mental health consults, and vocational training are all possible responses, and which would would have the best chance of preventing recidivism would depend on the specifics of that person and the risk factors in them reoffending.
In the past, we locked people in pillories and cut off their hands for crimes. Phasing out a cruel and ineffective punishment doesn't mean there's free reign for crime.
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revelboo · 11 hours ago
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Whrns the next Sunny n' Sides update?
How about now?
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Can’t Finish What You Started Pt 10
Sunstreaker x Reader, Sideswipe x Reader
• “Did you see it?” Bluestreak whispers. Reaching up a hand to where you’re perched on his shoulder to keep you steady as Sideswipe sits at the rec room table with Blue, Cliffjumper, and Bumblebee, he’s aware of the looks he’s getting from other Autobots. No, not just him. Hound and Trailbreaker are both whispering and glancing at their whole table.“Everyone’s being weird now,” Bluestreak adds, sounding hurt. None of them have their humans with them he notes as he wraps his servos around you and lowers you to the table. He’s brought you along because he’d thought you’d like to socialize with the other little humans. You, Bee’s, and Blue’s humans helping coax Cliff’s.
• Looking up at the other bots as Sides leans his arms on the table, you sit down crosslegged. Disappointed that there aren’t any other humans, because usually Bluestreak at least has his with him. It’s nice being able to talk to other people. Other humans. Sharing the awkward and surreal experience of belonging to an Autobot. “What exactly did I miss?” Sideswipe asks and Bee grimaces, waving a hand at him. Leaning forward, the yellow bot glances at you then whispers. “Don’t watch it here, but Megatron sent out an unencrypted warning to the Decepticons and, well, it’s causing some rumors. Speculation.” Megatron? You’ve heard Sunny and Sides talk about him, the leader of the enemy forces. But the rumors and speculation? Not a clue what they’re talking about. “But things are a bit tense right now. You should take your human back to your quarters, okay?”
• Venting as he stands and catches the optics staring at him, he reaches for you. It’s not hostility exactly, but Bee’s right about the tension. Something’s clearly off. An obvious division between the bots with humans and those without. What had Megatron said? Lifting you to cradle against his chassis, you lay a hand on him, looking up at him as he carries you back to his quarters. You’re not in danger from his fellow Autobots, but whatever’s going on is making him uneasy. Can hear the whispering as he walks with you, the looks. And you seem to be picking up on it, too. Leaning against him. “What’s going on?” You ask and he rubs a servo against your spine, trying to soothe you.
• “No idea,” he murmurs as he heads into his shared habsuite and finds Sunny already there, a datapad in hand and a frown on his face. “Hey, Bee said Megatron sent a message. Everyone’s being weird.” Sunny’s optics flick from him to you as he sets the datapad down and pushes it his way with a servo. Setting you down on the desk, he pulls the datapad to himself and plays the recording Sunny had queued up. And his mouth falls open. “What?”
• “What does frag mean?” You ask, head tipping up toward them. You couldn’t see the screen, but you’d heard the video and interfacing with the context seemed to imply sex. Which is absolutely crazy. And both twins grimace at the same time while you try to figure out the joke. Because that has to be a joke. “It means sex, doesn’t it?” And how would that even work? Biting the inside of your cheek to avoid asking the next logical question about their anatomy.
• “It does,” Sunny mutters, pressing his servos to his head. Feeling the tension in his processor growing. Because apparently the Decepticons are fragging humans and looking at you, knowing how fragile you are, he can’t help but feel faintly ill. Can’t imagine those other humans surviving very long at the brutal hands of the Cons. And for the first time, he’s glad Sides took you, because otherwise you might have ended up captured by a bored Decepticon. You’re safe here with him to protect you, but out there? If the cons are actively hunting humans? “Some of the other Autobots are talking about ‘adopting’ humans for their own safety now. Optimus hasn’t told them not to, but he’s not really said anything since the message went out. Others are whispering that some Autobots are already doing the same thing. Gossiping.” Venting tiredly, he reaches out a servo to you, rubbing your side.
• “Primus, do we know how many humans the Cons have?” Servos flexing, Sideswipe stares at you looking up at Sunny. So small he can pick you up with one hand. Delicate compared to them. A human taken by the Decepticons wouldn’t be treated so gently. Used until they die only to be replaced. “Optimus has to do something.” Reaching out he touches your arm just to reassure himself that you’re safe and whole. Can’t imagine those eyes terrified, your spirit broken at the hands of some Decepticon. “We have to do something.”
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Trine acquired
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helluva-squid · 16 hours ago
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I know there's so much to unpack about the character development of Stolas and Blitz, but I just want to talk about Loona for a sec.
She seems so much happier! And they didn't show that by drastically changing her personality - she's still blunt and brash and a little lacking in tact. But when she joined the gang on their mission, she not only immediately clocked when Blitz was upset, but offered actual comfort. She called him dad, put an arm around him, and even gently volunteered to get the job done for him.
During the fight at the palace, she got stuck right in to help save Stolas - but most of all, it wasn't until Andrealphus was directly threatening Blitz that she brought out her full hellhound form. She almost lost her dad once to that prick, and she sure as hell wasn't gonna let it happen again.
And she has friends! Other hellhound friends! Friends that she invites to holiday parties at her house. Friends that she isn't embarrassed to introduce to her dad, and who in fact seem to like Blitz. Most of all, Loona wanted Blitz to come hang with her and her friends during the party.
Though we don't know the exact details, we do know that Loona had a rough life before Blitz - clearly abandoned by whatever biological family she had, trapped in the hellhound equivalent of an orphanage/residential home, and facing the imminent threat of being thrown out on the streets. During the trial, she almost lost her second family, the one she's been able to scrape together over the years, and I think it made her confront how much she's been holding the world at arm's length this whole time.
I'm just so happy she finally feels safe enough to bring down that prickly shield and let people into her heart. And I really hope we get to see that develop more through season 3, with not just Blitz but Stolas too (can you imagine them bonding over making bitchy comments about the clients that come in to the office I need it directly in my veins)
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Say, if someone were to take a long time (more than months) before speaking up about racism, are they wrong for not immediately addressing it and instead letting the hurt fester? The first time it happened I was questioning my own perception, and by the time I became sure, it feels like it's too late (and it's also been very long after the last time I saw it happen too), and I feel like I also played a part in not immediately speaking up because of fear of the consequences. None of the racism were big enough, but if I were to list every instance then wouldn't it look like I'm being petty and trying to smear campaign someone? Or immature for being avoidant and not communicating my hurt immediately?
I'm going to approach this from an antiblackness perspective, since that's what I talk about here.
I think it depends on a couple of factors. Are you Black? If so, then no, it's not wrong to feel hurt about it no matter how long ago it happened. What you experienced was wrong, and it'll always be wrong. Plus, not wanting to speak up because you know it'll just be a threat to you is a common reason why Black people usually don't speak up about racism. Because yeah, you'll get dogpiled and gaslit and abused when you dare suggest someone was *gasp* bigoted toward you and needs to apologize! There's no statute of limitations on racism, and we shouldn't have to create an entire case to prove ourselves the way we do. That said, if this is a stranger, you will probably not be able to approach on the offensive because you let the time pass. So unless you have receipts, really all you can do is block them and move on with your life, or tell them privately "hey, this thing you said/did wasn't okay. I didn't say anything before because I wasn't sure how you'd take it, but I have not felt as safe around you since then, and I felt you needed to know" (and then probably block them). And you can't expect them to take it well- all you can do is say something, if you choose to at all. And if they take it that poorly, now you have the ability to tell others "yeah, this person did not take hearing about their bigotry well, and is not safe for Black people to be around". Because I would want to know if who I'm sharing from hates me.
If you are not Black, then I want you to consider (using your words) why the racism wasn't "big" enough, especially given that it wasn't dangerous towards you. What do you need to see in order to speak up? And by allowing it to get that large, recognize that you helped create a space where that behavior was safe and acceptable by saying nothing when all the "small" racism was occurring! That said, people are going to take it as petty regardless of your intent, because that's how racism is treated both here and outside the internet. It may be demeaned, treated as a smear campaign, because people think calling out racism is worse than being racist. So it really depends on how much you're willing to stand on it. You saw all these things happen, you have the receipts, you know you're in the right- are you willing to speak up? Are you willing to accept what may happen, or are you more worried about your own comfort? Maybe you'll allow Black people who saw all that racism feel heard and valid, so they can speak up too. Maybe you'll start a conversation that needs to be had. Maybe you'll be a step towards cracking that environment where this racism was acceptable, or worse case scenario, you'll recognize that this isn't a place you want to be if racism is treated so lightly. Those are hard decisions!
Sorry that this probably didn't make you feel better, but it's not a light topic.
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icarusredwings · 18 hours ago
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It didn't hurt. Honest, it didn't. But his whimpers and tears would make you think otherwise.
You would think that he was being put through an intense amount of pain just from the sounds that came from his throat. But he wasn't.
You could assume that he was being held down, forced to experience experimentation that was far too cruel for Dr. Henry McCoy to be doing.
I mean this is the X men. The x men don't hurt people in their secret labs. Did they? No.
His breaths are so uneven.
He's shaking like a hairless cat in the snow.
His body is locked up tight, holding as still as he possibly could. Eyes shut tight.
"Wade? Wade, baby, look at me. Hey, Shhh.. shh, they're just sensors, honey."
But he couldn't. He couldn't bare open his eyes. He was too petrified to move. To breathe. To speak.
"Does he want me to stop?" Hank asks, holding one of the last sensors with the tape already applied to the back.
Wade shakes his head softly before quickly going back to his tense state, a statue who couldn't stop shaking in fear, gobs of tears flowing down his face.
"Subconsciously, he does. But he's just scared. He knows it's for the better but... well you know how he got his powers.." Logan mutters, trying to rub his back, very gently kissing the tears off his face but he flinches away, too terrified to accept the affection.
"And.. you've taken..?"
"Yes, Hank, I took his knives. That dosn't mean he can't hurt you though." Logan says, softly taking his hand, trying to ground him, saying this more to Wade then to the blue guy.
"He could kill you with just the sensors alone.. throw this bed at you.. choke you with the sheets.. he's very smart. Very good with improvision."
Wade is able to take a deep breath from the praise, trying to focus on his air intake.
"Why are you giving him ideas??" Hank questions, taping on the last few of the sensors.
"Trust me, bub. You don't want him to feel helpless or he'll find his own way to not feel that way. And you don't want that. Besides. He's doing such a good job. Staying still, and didn't even hit you yet." Logan says, staring up at wade as he very hesitantly opens his eyes, sniffling as he lets out a whimper.
"Im sorry, he's going to what now?"
"Just shut up and hurry it up. He can't do this long." The man mutters, smiling softly at his boyfriend. "You're doing amazing. Now just breathe. Breathe. That's it. It's alright. No one's holding you down but me. I got you. I'd never hurt you, Wade." He says, holding his wrist ever so slightly so that Hank could retract some blood from his arm.
Wades eyes widden, making a loud whine, closing his eyes tight and looked away.
"Shhh.. shh, it's okay. Just a little bit. Just like when Dotty checks your blood every other Wednesday. Remember? Yeah, Just like that." Logan says, smiling at him as his breathing stablizes, looking at him with thick blurry suns. "D-dotty?"
"Yeah, honey. Just like that. And Hank is going to tell you everything that's happening okay? No suprises. No restraints. Just me, and Your friend Hank. Right?" He tells Wade, who by now was eyeing the blue man as he brought over clips.
"Fear not, my friend, these are only to record results."
Logan puts a hand out, stopping him for a second. "Is that okay?" He asks Wade. He had stopped shaking by now but sniffled, still tense and scared out of his wits.
"A-are they gonna shock me if-if im bad..?"
"What? They better not! Hank!!" It was important for Wade to know someone was on his side.
"N-no! No... I-it does produce a very small and controlled mico electrical pulse, but it's harmless."
Shying away, Wade starts to cry again, breath wavering. "I-it's gonna hurt!" He cries.
"Hey hey hey, shhh we've talked about this remember? You trust me. Right?"
Theres a small hesitant, as if Wade was asking his brain to see what the council had to say before slowly nodding.
"Okay, do you trust me to keep you safe?"
There's another nod, hiccuping as he sniffles.
"Well, I trust Hank not to hurt you. And if it hurts you can tell me and we'll stop okay?"
Swallowing, Wade opens his mouth to say something, then shakes his head, tensing again as he looks away, his head toward Logan, trying to ignore what ever Beast was doing to his arm.
"You're being so brave.. what is it you wanted to say? Hm?" His hand comes to his cheek as he thumbs under his eye, smiling ever so sweetly, staring with adoration.
"..T-thats what she said." He giggles, wiping some snot away, only for Logan to roll his eyes, but didn't leave or scold him. He was proud of him for this. Proud that he was trying so hard, proud of him for being able to relax. "You walked right into that one.. huh?"
"Pft..You nut.."
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This is your PSA, that medical advocancy is super sexy and is just as important as comfort. If a chaperone can not advocate, they should not be a chaperone.
Thinking about Logan taking Wade to Hank's and wade getting all nervous because the last time he tried to get help (and honestly- all of them) it has turned out terrible and the only person he trusts is his female Urologist because thats who gives him his bi monthly sti checks. Him bouncing his leg and being silent. Him staring at the door and the floor, breathing with skips and picking his nails.
Logan gently taking his hand and squeezing it, leaning over to kiss his head. "Don't.. I wouldn't let anything happen to you." He whispers but this isnt the first time someone has failed wade.
"Y-you know what-" he says, changing his mind, standing. "I think I left the curling iron on. We should leave. Like right now."
"Wade... Sit."
He whines, staying standing for a couple more seconds, trying to think of an excuse to leave before sitting, curling up into his arm, clearly scared. Because without his powers what is he? No, really. Take away his neat new powers and who is he? Useless. That's what.
The x men barley wanted to take him now WITH his powers, not even the goverment will want him without them. The wolverine wouldn't want to be with a measly crazy human, Someone so insane that when he formed his own team they all left him too. Everyone left him, so why wouldn't Logan? "D-do I have too?"
"It'll be better for you this way."
"B.. but I dont want too."
"Darlin' I swear you'll be okay. Everything will be fine."
Little does he know that Logan would love him with or without powers.
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1001galaxygal · 8 hours ago
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spoilers for link click bridon arc ep 1
ive seen some people criticizing the new link click episode for being confusing or sidetracking the main plot, and i think they are missing a lot of what The Point of this episode is.
so first i wanna talk about WHY i think this episode is structured the way it is and then i wanna talk about the new information we've received in terms of the lore and timeline shenanigans and generally ramble about how great of a set up episode this!
SO first: the structure of the episode. ive seen quite a few people confused or unhappy with the plot lines this episode, and i think first its important to understand that that was two episodes mushed into one.
1st episode - anime con
2nd- scammer girl
soooo lets talk about what these two episodes do for the overall narrative AND our understanding of the characters.
in episode 1, we see cxs die - and there is a LOT of mystery still surrounding this event but i think what we're supposed to gather is that there are two main timelines. timeline a (the original where we see cxs die) and timeline b (the timeline were following for the rest of the season and in s1 and s2). we've been shown no reason to believe lu guang has traveled back more than once. this is the first time that we see lu guang travel - evident by his emotional reaction to seeing cxs die. its not resignation, its shock. he didnt expect him to die at all. and his reaction to seeing cxs again in their first meeting in timeline b.
so what is the anime con sideplot doing there? firstly i think its evident by the way lu guang turns away near the end that he is planning to stay away from cxs. but he chooses not to BECAUSE of the way we get that classic feel good adventure with a problem and resolution- cxs LIKES being helpful and kind, it makes him happy. and seeing cxs happy makes lu guang happy and so he decides to abandon the idea of leaving. in a meta sense the episode returns us to a sense of normalcy not just to the audience but to lu guang too. secondly, this episode shows us how lu guang introduces his powers to cxs and qiao ling. he tells them its divination, and while he eventually tells cxs that thats not true, it does show us how qiao ling would know to get them jobs in s1 while not knowing about their powers.. she thinks lu guang is psychic lol! also in this timeline (timeline b) this is the shiguang meetcute!! this is how they became friends! this is re-contextualizing all of season 1! super cool and exciting!
so for episode 2- what the purpose here? mainly its too show us a rudimentary form of what shiguang's missions are like! think about it! this episode is the first ever time cxs goes on a mission with lu guang in his ear telling him what to do! this is SO IMPORTANT for contextualizing their relationship with each other! also cxs being accidentally put in danger and lu guang being able to save him this time? this is cathartic for lu guang as well, to trust he can keep cxs safe, this is why he asks to live w cxs at the end of the episode!
tldr: this episode's structure might feel kinda all over the place but thats kind of the point! lu guang as well as the audience are having to resettle in a new timeline, and the stories her serve as the avanues to understanding the characters and timeline better!
so what did we learn about the LOREEE?
1st: timeline a shiguang were messing with the past which is why vein comes to kill them - what they were messing with and why is still yet to be revealed, but it wasnt due to lu guang traveling to save cxs cuz cxs hadnt died yet
2nd: the 12 hour limit is there because if you stay for longer than 12 hours in the photograph you stay there forever - you become part of the photograph, which is why lu guang's eyes return to normal from the yellow. we do not yet know if this means that lu guang no longer has cxs's power or if he still has it.
3: there is likely only two timelines - timeline a where cxs dies and timeline b- the current one were in and the one that takes place in s1 and 2.
4: cxs probably gets his powers from someone in london dying in his arms
5: Powers are passed down through death, which means in s3 qiao ling will have li tianxi's powers!!!!
6: lu guang is absolutely weak to cxs puppy eyes! that man folded immediately
thats all ive gotten from just this episode! in conclusion, this episode does a great job of confirming SO MANY theories, giving us an insight into the characters (especially lu guang) and setting up the adventure going forward that leads them to london! really excited to see how the next episodes play out!!!
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leawuy · 2 days ago
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No one talks about the things after the shift.
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Now you might be confused with what I mean here. “What do you mean no one talks about the things after the shift itself isn’t it obvious?” Yes and NO.
(This is mainly for people who have entered the void state before or have mini shifted multiple times before so if that’s not you this might not be super helpful I don’t want to waste your time😭)
Let me explain;
When you’re shifting your mind is focused on getting to your DR, right? You are focusing on getting to your desired reality, embodying your DR self, getting to be in your DR’s room, getting to meet all of your favourite people getting to do all of that.
What a lot of people forget to do is to GROUND themselves. And now you might say “but that’s the easy part everyone knows how to ground themselves” no.
Now I might not sound super optimistic and maybe even a tad bit toxic but that is not the easy part. If you don’t know how to ground yourself you will simply feel your surroundings change you will get memory flashbacks perhaps hear people but come back to your OR immediately.
Why does this happen why can some people fully ground themselves and others cannot fully ground themselves?
This mainly has to do with your mind relying on your logical side. Your mind is trying to keep you safe and trying to keep you in your OR for safety, hence your DR just being another reality where you exist in.
“How do you turn off your logical side?” Simple, you don’t. Let the logical side of your mind be COMFORTABLE with reality shifting by repeating affirmations such as “I am safe in my DR” or “my DR is familiar to me” such and such. This will make your mind feel at ease and it won’t be a hassle to shift.
Now for the part AFTER the shift, like I said no one talks about the things after the shift. And what exactly do I mean with this?
The shift itself is instant, it doesn’t take time to shift it’s like in the blink of an eye and you’re there. It mostly depends on what you do AFTER you’ve shifted. You need to be able to ground yourself calmly and not to excitedly and let it GO. Let it happen let it be. Your ability to shift doesn’t lack but your ability to ground yourself does. You need to be calm and realize you are THERE. Everyone’s going to shift at some point so let it BE.
Happy shifting xx
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tubbytarchia · 3 days ago
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Do you also feel as if the reason Scott always survives so much is that, besides being a good pvper, he just stays in the corner (sometimes literally) and doesn’t engage in the same risks as most others? I remember feeling really frustrated about it in Limited Life specifically but idk if that’s just a me thing.
In a way, yes, I do think he stays out of the action more than others. In fact there is this one time in Secret Life when him, Bdubs and Impulse were in a game of tag, and Bdubs was with his horse. Scott stole that horse and told Bdubs that it was unfair for him to have it and he would get it back at the end of the session, Bdubs reluctantly agrees. And then later in that session, this mf rolls up to Bdubs on that same horse, saying "I just wouldn't be able to escape otherwise". That is just a direct contradiction of the "fairness" that he claimed himself to want to provide for the sake of the other players. He has been a massive hypocrite or just unfair on multiple occasions for the sake of self-preservation but he knows how to paint his actions as bearing less weight than they do and make others feel like he's doing a favor and being a friend
But it's not even so much that as it is him generally staying in people's good graces, even when it's borderline manipulative or he antagonizes someone else to achieve the desired effect. Pearl wasn't exactly innocent in DL but it was Scott who ostracized her and stayed in good favor with most people by virtue of painting himself as the sensible one between the two of them when he instigated much more harm. He just intentionally doesn't leave strong enough impressions for anyone to want to kill him and will rather partake in small gestures of kindness; most times anyone's wanted to get him was because of him just being on more lives or time and not because he'd done anything to them (And people like Joel have actually been wronged by him in a very tangible way, justifying their desire to get back at him)
I'm confident that everyone within these games knows how to SURVIVE better than they do. But the point isn't survival, the point is content - conflict, interaction, etc. Scott also knows how to play it safe and stay in relative good favor with people by not offering up too much, but I have to agree that he seems to prioritize that more than anyone else. The most compelling aspect of his character is his self-sacrificial nature, and without any context, him sacrificing himself for others seems like a high and respectable toll, but he knows exactly what he's doing, he knows how much he can give and be fine and in control. When he sacrifices himself, he's prioritizing the benefit that will offer him and not the recipient. He's just very good at the social mindgame of it all, which is what makes things most interesting about his character, but it becomes less fun when he's this focused on survival and always gets away with it, almost never facing any punishment despite being equally as guilty of wrongdoing as any other member of the series
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jackiepackiee · 11 hours ago
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LOVE LANGUAGES…
W/ HIDDEN INVENTORY JJK
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Physical Touch - Shoko doesn’t show her affection in a traditional way, not through just hugs and hand holding. Instead she likes being able to touch her person to know they are with her, knowing she can keep them safe. Her healing is best through touch, and while it’s strictly professional with others, she feels a certain kind of comfort in the feeling of her lover under her hands that she doesn’t feel otherwise
Quality Time - Young Gojo Satoru is… interesting. he has good intentions for those that he loves. Intentions of which he prioritizes in safety. And nothing leaves him feeling more secure than being with the person he cares for. Knowing they are safe, even if it means just watching him as he scarfs down sweets, is good enough for him. He’s not overly sentimental, but if he was caught staring anyone can see the true content he feels being with the one he loves
Words of Affirmation - Haibara believes in the best of the world, and wants his lover to know of all the affection he feels for them. He’s the type to fluster people without intending to, giving the most heart warming compliments or encouragements without a second thought. Things like “Wow, you’re incredible!” And “I’m so lucky to be with you” are common, things he says with a smile daily
Gift Giving - Nanami as a teenager is just trying his best to get through the day as is, so his partner being with him is something he’s eternally grateful for. He’s not great with words or touch, so he gives anything he thinks would be enjoyable just to give the slightest bit of pleasure for the person he loves. He knows it’s not going to be enough with just materials, but he’s too whipped to show how he truly feels any other way
Acts of Service - Geto Suguru, even if calm and cool, is an absolute puppy when in love. He’s not walking around with heart eyes though, instead he’s doing any and everything to help out the person he is with. As small as lending a jacket or helping unknot a tricky necklace to as big as spawning his most powerful curses at a sign of danger. He will do anything in his power to make his lovers life safe, easy, and fun
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woolieshubris · 15 hours ago
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So, you've been sent bait: A Guide for Internet Posters and Readers
Disclaimer: I am simply an autistic internet poster with a special interest in human interaction, abuse patterns, and internet culture. I am not a scholar and I do not have a degree in these things. While I have done research into the topics of cancellation, online abuse, and harassment, I am far from an expert.
Introduction:
I've seen this happen dozens of times before. A semi popular blogger will suddenly seem embroiled in a controversial topic, receiving harassment and accusations of some pretty terrible things. It goes on for about 24-72 hours, and then poof, it seems to be completely over, (however, of course, it can be brought up again without warning.) This can be emotionally damaging for the blogger, for the supporters of that blogger, and for the shock waves it will undoubtedly send into the greater community. This also further spreads discourse and popularizes harmful ideologies to people who might have previously never heard of them. The targets are almost always trans women, (with transmisogyny doing most of the cancellation legwork) and it seems to always have the goal of turning fellow trans people against the target. (Though, of course, I've seen this done with autistic creators, nonbinary creators, ect. Trans women are just the most popular target.)
Now, the goal of this guide is to help people understand how this happens, be able to recognize the patterns of a targeted harassment campaign, and be able to try and prevent it in the future. I'll be writing this as a guide to the target, however, I think it's important for lurkers/readers to also be able to recognize these patterns so they too can avoid being manipulated into falling into these pitfalls. A large portion of this harassment initiative is to use "useful idiots" in order to do most of the legwork. As a reader, you must avoid becoming a useful idiot, (which I'll be referring to as fools from now on) and you must be able to tell when other people are being used in this manner as well. This is the most effective way to protect people from unwarranted harassment campaigns.
Section 1: Bait
Types of Bait:
You've been sent bait, but you aren't sure if it is actually bait, or a genuine question from a fan. You don't want to ignore someone's valid concern, so you answer it even though you might not be sure. This is your first mistake! If you think it might be bait, it's best to treat it as such. Think of bait asks as toxic waste. If you aren't sure, it's much better to be safe than sorry. If you receive a bait ask, your best bet is to delete it and not respond at all. Yes, it will probably rattle you, and you'll probably feel bad about deleting the question, but you need to understand that it doesn't matter. If this person was asking a genuine question, they would understand if you don't want to answer. If they get annoyed or angry at your lack of answer- they were likely asking it with the intent to hurt you.
The first type of bait is bringing up a controversial topic.
While certain topics (like queer rights, abortion, Palestinian freedom) do actually matter in the real world and I would believe are worth responding to or making your position clear (as long as it is something you do have an opinion on) this does not mean all controversial topics are equal. Many topics that are "hot debates" online do not matter in the real world. (for example, proship vs antiship). Regardless of the validity of the debate, if it doesn't matter in the real world, it likely isn't worth publicly stating your opinion on those things. That is why people who are active in those movements try to make these things seem like they have real world consequences- to try and make their debate more valid and easier to pull more people into. The real goal with many of these topics is not to try and have a reasonable discussion. The goal is to try and pull as many people into them as possible. If they can successfully get ANY response out of you, then they win. Their debate is now broadcasted on your platform. Their thoughts, arguments, philosophies are now spread to thousands of people instantly. Even if you respond with an answer like "huh?" "what?" or "what does this mean???" they still win. Your acknowledgement of the debates existence at ALL is a win for them. They get to publicly platform their beliefs on your profile. If you respond at all and express even the slightest hint of an opinion, then they will have an entire section of fools that can now send you messages about this topic. Death by a thousand paper cuts. This is the most common type of bait, and the reason is simple. Internet debates can suck in people and can quickly rot peoples brains. Like sleeper agents, people will automatically start trying to chime in the moment they see the hints of any debate. If you fall for this debate, the best thing to do is delete everything, block main players and wait it out. With any luck, it will be completely forgotten by the end of the week.
The second type of bait is an accusation.
Again, while some allegations or accusations are worth responding to, if it is completely false, not responding will be your best bet. If you do respond at all, the allegation and your name will be linked in peoples minds. Even if you deny it, people will be confused as to why it was brought up at all. They might even think that you are lying or deflecting. Responding to the accusation at all is treated as a confession. If this accusation is something you've heard before, it would be worth looking into the source of the claim- someone might be spreading lies about you. However, if this accusation is something you've never received before, it is almost certainly bait. They are trying to make you look bad. Just delete them. If this is something you are receiving from a specific person, ask them about it privately. Never respond to false accusations on your public platform unless you know the source of the accusations. If you have to respond to them, you need to link to the accusation in full, not vaguely describe them. When you vaguely describe them, then you are putting the duty on the readers to find the accusation- they'll read it on the accusers terms- putting the ball directly into the accusers court. If your reader reads it directly from the accusers, then it will automatically make your refutation look dubious by comparison. Make it easy for the reader to see the full accusation and point out the absurdity of the claims. By laying out all of the information clearly, the readers will be able to easily figure out that the claims were bogus. In future confrontations, your supporters will likely even respond to the accusers for you, now that they fully understand the arguments against you. Supporters love to correct people, and this can help you significantly- just as much as it can hurt. It's a double edged sword, so if you point it in the right direction, it can help protect you against false accusations.
The third type of bait is confusion.
This type of bait is a bit harder to spot, and it's usually blended with the other two types. This type of bait is deliberately confusing. The confusing nature is what makes it such effective bait. A vague message can be read a thousand ways, and as long as one person can spin it in a way that makes you a "horrible person" then that can quickly become the narrative. If you receive a question that you do not understand, you have no reason to answer it. If you can't answer, simply not acknowledging it at all is the smartest thing to do.
How to deal with bait:
As I've stated in the previous sub-sections, the first time you receive any type of bait, you should ignore it. The intentions of the bait may differ, but they all need to be treated in the same way- with no respect at all. Anyone who tells you otherwise is someone who wishes for you to be hurt or a fool. If you receive it more than once, try blocking the person. If you continue to receive it, then that means that in all likelihood it's more than one person sending you the bait, and it might not be bait after all. However, you should proceed with extreme caution. You do not respond to the bait- you figure out the source of the questions and answer it on your own terms. Simply making a post like "Hey, for the record, I support dolphins." will go over a thousand times better than a post that goes like "'Why do you hate dolphins?' I don't." If you are receiving bait, another way to deal with it is by turning anonymous asks off and looking into the blogs of people sending you the bait. Search terms relating to the question they asked. If it's something they seem to get into a lot of internet fights over, block them. The approach you must always consider bait with is that all of the bait asks you receive are sent by one person trying to seem like a group of people. This is on purpose- they want to intimidate you into answering. This is why blocking and turning off anonymous asks can be useful tools. It forces them to unmask themselves.
Footnote 1: The response by these bait people is often "keeping on anonymous asks allow people to feel safe in asking these important questions." Your safety is more important. This is just trying to guilt trip you. Fools will also often respond similarly. After all, it can sound compelling. However you are not a publicly traded company. You do not need transparency. You do not have body guards or multiple employees. You are a singular person with a right to privacy and safety.
Summary
In this section, we discussed the main types of bait: controversial, accusatory, and confusing. We also talked about the best way to deal with each type, as well as the pitfalls of responding to each type, and how to deal with a larger harassment campaign.
If you personally have fallen victim to any of these techniques, either as a fool or a poster, I can understand how you might feel- however the important aspect of these types of bait is that they can and do trick people. If they didn't work, they wouldn't be used. It is not your fault for falling for it- it is completely on the perpetrators of this abuse. However, I hope this guide can help people to protect themselves or recognize when these things are happening to them.
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gay-dorito-dust · 1 day ago
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Oh, should i request it again then?
Damian pining after a male reader, its like his first big crush, its like their first patrol and damians all like "should i confess or nauh..."
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Damian didn’t do feelings, or at least he liked to say he didn’t but in actuality he was raised by those who felt that emotions hindered his potential, his progress and thus installed the idea that the moment he started to feel something; he was bound to become a dead man.
So when he realised that he was developing a crush on you- a fellow vigilante- Damian knew he was a man doomed to fall upon his sword because he felt as though he needed to keep you safe, despite knowing well enough that you were capable of taking care of yourself if you managed to stay alive as long as you had.
However main couldn’t help but notice how vastly different you both were from one another. He had rough edges, a sandpaper like surface that felt like thousands of sharp teeth like fangs, he wasn’t exactly a welcoming presence to others; unlike you as you were the exact opposite of him. You were soft yet firm, strong enough to be able to give other kindness, and wielded a will power of pure iron and unyielding strength to push through any and all adversity.
A true reason for people to hope for a brighter future in comparison to him, but as Dick told him once, opposites attract and it was only natural for Damian to feel pulled towards you that he couldn’t explain. He still couldn’t explain it and it sent him mad at most times, but now that he was here with you on patrol, he couldn’t help but feel that things were becoming clear to him now as your presence tended to clear the fog within his head and help things seem clearer then before.
Now Damian faced a completely different challenge, should he confess to you of his innermost feelings, or remain true to what he was taught and keep the emotions within his chest until he -or they- died. This conflict raged even more within poor Damian as his shoulder brushes yours ever so slightly, causing his breath to hitch and his body to straighten upon instinct, all the while you only smiled at him and Damian damned his heart for speeding up at the sight of such a small thing.
‘You okay dami? You seem a little more brooding than usual.’ You said teasingly.
‘It’s nothing.’ He replied straightforward, his eyes firmly locked on the city you both swore to better, to protect and change.
You furrowed your brows, concerned. ‘Are you sure? If you don’t feel up to going on patrol with me I can always get dick to-‘
‘No.’ Damian almost shouted at the idea of having to deal with his brother talking his ear off about how he missed his opportunity to confess to you tonight, and how he’ll have to try and find another way to set you and him up on a mission. ‘I’ve just got a lot on my mind, I’m sorry if I come off as snippy or rude.’ You smiled and rested a hand on his shoulder, squeezing as all Damian could do was get lost within your gaze, words that he wanted to say died on his tongue as his mind blanked everything out but you.
‘Good, I wouldn’t want my Damian to get bored of me now.’ You joked as you patted his shoulder twice before letting your hand drop to your side again before choosing to overlook the city yourself. Unaware that Damian’s eyes had long shifted to you in the process. He hated how you made him feel but didn’t want to live in a life without it either, it was the most frustrating thing he’s ever felt but yet the most beautiful and he wanted to explore it deeper, it reminded him of how he often had issues with how his art came off a times to the point he had to redo the entire piece all over again.
‘Bored? You’re the only person I can wilfully tolerate on patrols.’ Damian found himself saying upon instinct but thankfully for him, you didn’t think more of it other than him being blunt.
‘I’m glad because I’m staring to like you Damian.’ You admitted.
Damian wondered whether you knew what you were saying and the way they made him feel half of the time, but at least you were more open with your emotions then him, so when Damian went back to the thought of confession to you he decided that tonight wouldn’t be the night; he still had time to do so and besides Damian didn’t fell it would be appropriate to confess on a patrol, perhaps an outing with his dogs would suffice instead?
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angelesca · 2 days ago
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“the stars will bend so that we can find each other again.”
w.c. 1k~ / content: sunday x gnreader, soft but desperate sunday strikes again, unrequited(?), angst on xmas what a blessing, open ending, you leave sunday behind to take a train starward a/n: my initial idea was completely scrapped bc i wanted to write more sad sunday, soooo this was a last minute plan i quickly conjured for xmas ( . •́ _ʖ •̀ .) it is unedited short but enjoy nonetheless!
inspired by closet(acoustic ver.) - fleshwater ♪
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⋆⁺₊❅。
welcome aboard, dear passengers. please take your designated seats.
spirited penacony, bold in glamour and hues, is dulled by the colourless winter and painted with nightly blues. the snow becomes like paper under your feet, where your imprint is etched to reveal a long trail, telling stories about your journey. you have come a long way.
however, there is another story to be told. beside you was another pair of shoes, their footprints lagging ever so slightly behind your strides. their steps were uneven, crooked—shy off two beats from keeping up with your pace, but bordering on the fear of you acknowledging even a sliver of their haunting shadow.
it will pain you to turn around. so don’t. the train greets you, its opened door ready to embrace your tired body. the freedom you sought is within reach and you place one foot inside.
“won’t you please look at me?”
your breath hitches. the grip on your luggage tightens. 
“i beg of you.”
you are stuck in limbo. 
“...i’m leaving, sunday.”
the train is about to depart. please remain seated as the express prepares for your journey.
you turn to face him and mask everything with a smile, but what sort of person would he be if he cannot notice your performance? it is not a satisfactory answer. sunday would not budge. he would not care if the snow buried him. 
if he doesn’t, you will have to make the move, push him far enough over the edge for you knew how stubborn he could be. perhaps the truth could break it once and for all.
you swallow the dryness in your throat. “... i'm tired of being stuck here." people are not meant to be birds trapped in a cage. keep them for too long, and they will start to wonder about the purpose of their wings.
sunday’s eyes waver, a disparity widens from his usual orchestrated composure. “i thought i kept you safe,” he speaks, “i would give you the world if you desired so.”
“you didn’t. you hid it away from me.” the years have passed and the stars rotate along. you were never meant to be here forever. “there is a vast greatness beyond the dreamscape, beyond penacony, and beyond planets.”
“but you can’t—”
“you’re doing it again,” you interrupt, “i am not yours to order. please, let go of me...”
he pauses at your hard tone. it carves the words into him as he repeats it over into his head, so easily scrapes him into mere bits despite his practiced acting. 
“then, can you tell me where you are going?”
before you went out, you forged your resolve: you would leave tonight. “... i’m sorry,” you mutter, "i don’t want you searching for me. i will return when the time is right, not when you command it so.”
“... i see.”
the nostalgic past flashes on sunday’s face, and you remember the younger him as you notice his downcast eyes. his wings are barely fluttering and he is playing with his fingers. the drift of the sea of snow does nothing to obscure it, and it works in his favour.
don’t fall for it… except that this is not part of sunday’s act. these are his true feelings. he cherishes you greatly, but you are too familiar with how it drowns you. he needs to know you are near him, have you safe, be able to watch you. control. it reflects upon the way he oversees penacony. 
sunday's fingers hesitate, hovering in the air. "can you tell me for how long...? how about your companions? will you be far away? will you stay in touch? have you told everyone? how... how long will i have to..."
"..."
any separation will feel like eternity, never to close. it is a sunday who is afraid of losing anyone again, so he clinches onto them as tight as he can to the point of suffocation. his hands are behind his back, tightening into a prayer, mourning the hollowness that your presence is supposed to occupy.
emotion wells in your heart. it is only when you need to forget him, that he suddenly becomes so hard to ignore. "sunday... listen to me."
you hope that time will offer him space to contemplate. and although it is a painful reminder, you hope that the hole you leave behind will convey your message. you hold out your pinky towards sunday. “let’s believe that the universe will hold us together,” you gaze at the night sky. "you alone are not meant to hold the weight of the world."
sunday's wings twitch. his halo hums.
you nudge your pinky at him. “one day, the stars will bend so that we can find each other again.”
bells chime in the distance, chords striking, and the strings resound a melody of calming tuned to open ears. it reminds him that the passage of time is relentless, no matter how many more seconds he borrowed—it only delays the inevitable. 
sunday gazes off to the side, observing something transcending penacony’s familiar ground. a concept vast and horrifying, but perhaps beautiful and endless.
sunday then looks at you. "you promise?"
"promise." and memories of a younger you and sunday flicker, hand in hand, smiling against the odds, against a fate that could have made you strangers.
sunday’s smile is afflicted, but hopeful. the stories didn’t end here. there will be many winters to come, and the snow will always be ready to write your tales.
he links his pinky with yours. in the vast and horrifying, a sealed promise sets alight two more stars who will eventually separate with light years between them. only when these stars aligns, they will bend to meet again.
sunday untangles his finger, slithering his hand over your palm to study you one more time. your hand that used to be smaller, now fits comfortably in his hand. 
his eyes glimmer colourfully. he watches how much brighter you shine—a star who is returning to the cosmos, a bird who belongs to the sky—understanding that you were never his.
once again, the train is about to depart—
sunday gradually lets go of your hand, setting you free. his warmth leaves you. you step inside the train with a destination to elsewhere, waving him goodbye. “thank you.”
—and may this journey lead you starward.
⋆⁺₊❅。
a/n: have a merry christmas, get lots of presents(no boring socks), christmas tree doesnt fall and crush you, no burning down houses bc the turkey was forgotten, always winning the christmas crackers, the christmas pudding is actually a delectable 4-tiered heart-shaped chocolate cake, no awkward family games everyone just plays mario kart, gingerbread biscuits come to life, santa likes your cookies, rudolph has a red nose, michael buble serending you, the christmas elves are finally free, sunday makes out with you under the mistletoe ho ho ho🧑‍🎄 thank you for reading!!
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suprababka · 2 days ago
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How you first met & how they asked you out on a first date (part 2)
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Featuring:
• Garou • Metal Bat • Amai Mask
[Saitama & Genos & Speed-o'-Sound Sonic: part 1] [Flashy Flash & Zombieman & King: part 3]
A/N: Merry Christmas! Thank you everyone for reading what I do and supporting me, it means a lot. I always do my best to make you guys happy because I really appreciate all of you. As some of you can remember, I've already mentioned a few times my first post with headcanons, and here it is! Finally, after all this time, I can present it to you as a gift for Christmas!🎄💫🎊🎉
(I hope I didn't mess anything up, and I'm sorry for being a bit late! I really wanted to publish this post sooner but couldn't. We don't celebrate Christmas in my country btw) Unfortunately, I had to split up post into 3 parts :((( Alright, let's see if you guys like my headcanons! :) (I low-key cringe at them tbh)
And dear anons, who requested headcanons, do not worry! I remember about you and will post everything, I just wanted to have a logical "begining" for hcs, you know?
Thanks for all the likes, comments, reblogs and following me! I really appreciate your feedback and support, guys!🥰🫶
You can check my masterlist too see more of my other works.
Prepare for possible OOC!
(Sorry if there are any mistakes!)
And, most importantly, enjoy!!!
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You're used to constantly listening to music in your headphones at full volume
To ignore all hustle and bustle and focus on yourself and your daydreams about... practically, anything
(and of course to imagine yourself in a cool edit)
With the help of music, you're able to ignore people's rude remarks towards each other or to you for whatever reasons
However, sometimes it's better to be aware of your surroundings
For example, you're returning back to your home now and it's late evening
Some weirdo catcalls you, but you don't hear it, being engrossed in your favourite song
Suddenly you feel someone grabbing you by your wrist and pressing you against the wall
"I said heeey," you squirm and wince, feeling the smell of alcohol
"L-let go of me!"
"Hey, relax, girliiiie. I just wanted to – hiccup – to talk to yaaa... Such a cute giiirl. C'mon, let's kiss."
"No, I don't want that!" you try to free your hand, but the man's grip only tightens
"Don't be such a brat now. – hiccup – If ya don't wanna kiss... we can get freaky straight awaaay..."
"Ew, no!" you make an attempt to shove him away, but he's stronger
"Rruude. – hiccup – Come on, let's get started with a kiiiiiss..." you start looking around in hope of finding someone not indifferent, but people seem not to notice you
"Huh? Don't worryyy. – hiccup – Nobody is gonna seeee us. We'll be quiet."
"Get away from me!"
"Shut it, girl. Wait, nooo... – hiccup – Keep your mouth open... and gimme that kiss..." the man starts to lean in, but a sudden tap on his shoulder interrupts him
"Hey, how about I give you a kiss?"
The drunk man turns to the tall stranger who pecks his knuckles
"Huh? Who the hell–"
In the next moment, the drunk prick is knocked out cold on the floor
"Tch, disgusting," the stranger clenches his fist with annoyed look
You blink for a few seconds, processing what just happened
You feel a huge wave of relief, realising that you're safe now, and sense your body and lips trembling
Or they were doing that before?
Remembering about your life saver, you look at him, but the tears in your eyes don't let you examine him in detail
"Th-thank You!" you grab his hand, "Thank You so much! Y-you saved me! Thank You! How can I thank You?"
Garou looks at you both confused and annoyed
Confused because he's just not used to being treated like that, to people thanking him and clinging to him
Annoyed because he was in a bad mood the whole day
Thankfully, he let off some steam on the drunk man
Bu-ut the thought of other drunkards who pester fragile and helpless girls like you makes him angry again
It pisses him off
He hates it
Just look at you, clinging to him as if he's your lifebuoy
(well, he practically is)
When you calm down a bit, you let go of his hand and wipe away your tears
"Sorry, I wasn't myself for a moment..."
Now Garou is puzzled, not knowing what do next
Originally, he wanted to teach the prick a lesson and then continue going back to his place
But seeing your scared face made him realise that he can't let you go on your own
Looks like his plans changed
"Erm, can you walk on your own?"
"Yeah... I can," you take a few steps with your slightly shaking legs
"Good."
"But thank You. Seriously."
"Well, someone had to teach the bastard a lesson. Now let's go. I'll accompany you."
"Uh, there is no need to! You already did enough for me, I can't ask You-"
"It wasn't a question. Or what, afraid of your boyfriend seeing us?"
"I don't have a boyfriend..."
"Then I'm definitely coming. Or you'll get into trouble again," you two begin to walk
"... Thank You, sir."
"Sir? Don't call me that, I'm only 18, so let's talk without formality."
"You're 18?!"
"Yeah, what's with that?"
"Uh, nothing... I'm Y/n, by the way."
"Garou."
"It's really nice to meet you, Garou. Seriously, thanks again."
"Yeah-yeah, I get it, you can stop that."
"I'm just really grateful. So if there is any way I can-"
"You can thank me by not getting yourself into trouble again."
"Right, okay."
You continue to walk in awkward silence
Or it's for you awkward since Garou is deep in his thoughts with his hands in pockets
But he sees your struggle of not knowing what to do and, with a sigh, decides to "help" you
"Fine, you can treat me with some good food."
"Huh?"
"As a way to thank me. It seems you can't just let it go."
"Yeah, you're right. But you want me to treat you today or any other day? And in a restaurant or–
You're interrupted by Garou's chuckle
"You really like to solve everything right on the spot, huh? But let's eat out not today, I'm not hungry, heh. I don't care which day, but evening is preferable. You decide the rest, just remember that I eat a lot."
"Got it. So if you don't mind, I'd like to cook dinner and invite you to my place."
"I wouldn't invite myself to a restaurant either since it'd cost you a fortune!" Garou suddenly laughs
(as if products aren't expensive)
"But I love home food, so it sounds like a plan."
"Great, does this Saturday sound good?"
"Yep."
Meanwhile you reach your home
"I live here. Let's exchange our phone numbers and keep in touch?"
"... Yeah, that would be reasonable. Let's do that."
It's safe to say that Garou LOVES your food when trying it
It brings him some weird but warm sensations from his childhood
He feels as if he is at home, place where he can feel safe and cared for
Such a strange feeling, but... he likes it
He also enjoys having conversations about different topics with you
(and he's pleasantly surprised when you agree with him that fictional villains deserve appreciation and understanding too)
But is it really the end of... whatever was between the two of you? You're gonna just split up and live on?
Both of you hesitant to hint on mutual attraction desire to spend time together more
When it's time to say goodbye, you tell him to text you if he needs anything and stop by to share a meal
You both laugh it off (just in case)
And off Garou goes
Don't be sad though, because it just so happens you keep running into each other on the streets
And what a coincidence that almost every time one of you needs help: either he helps you with carrying the groceries, you patch him up, he accompanies you to make sure you're safe, or you invite him for tea and wait out the rain
One evening he put his shoes on, getting ready to head out from your place, and you see him off
"So, see you soon, huh?"
"Yeah, see ya. But next time will be a date," his signature cocky grin (that you already both hate and love at the same time) appears on his face
"Hah- What?"
"You heard me, bye for now," he waves you goodbye with his back turned to you and disappears in the crowd
"I guess I have no choice, huh? Not that I complain though..." you mutter to yourself before closing a door with the biggest smile on your face
Bonus:
Garou isn't dumb when it comes to realising his feelings
Well, yeah, it scares him at first since he doesn't want to depend on anyone and possibly be heartbroken
He tries to avoid you, but his attempts are in vain
Because he tends to get close to you as much as possible both mentally and physically
So he has no other option but to accept his crush on you
The next thing he wants to know is your feelings towards him
So in order to do that, he starts watching your every move, reaction, glance, touch, smile and listening to your every word very attentively
And of course he sees signs of attraction
(at least he hopes that these are)
Garou isn't someone who will appear at your door with a bouquet of flowers and nicely ask you out
So yeah, he decides to act all confident and practically leave you no choice but to go out with him
(he doesn't want to even consider rejection)
But he shouldn't worry because there is no way you'd deny him, right? ;)
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Your heart is breaking every time you see posters with missing pets
They look so happy in their photos
And who knows what happens to these poor creatures...
You also feel sorry for their owners who must feel devastated
(what makes it worse is that there are some idiots who find it funny to call pet owners and imitate animal sounds)
Today is no exception
You stand in front of another poster
A cute cat is depicted in the picture
"Tama is a really friendly and calm cat. She likes to be petted and held in arms, but can also be easily scared too. If you find our cat, please be patient with her, so she could get comfortable around you. A generous reward is promised, please call this number: + XXX XXX XXXX" the text in the poster says
Sighing, you continue going to home and see this sheet glued to something every two steps
Damn, Tama's owners must be really worried about her
That's quite understandable
But sadly, as much as you want, you can't help them
So you continue going back home
As you're about to open the door, you suddenly hear a cat's loud meowing, signaling that the cat is hurt
You check the surroundings and find a cat with an unpleasant wound on his leg
Millions of different possible scenarios and outcomes race through your mind
Should you take a blanket from your place to wrap it around the cat and go to the vet?
Or maybe just patch up the cat at home?
What if he's hungry and thirsty?
The wound isn't bleeding, so it's something
In the end you decide to use your shirt as cocoon for the cat and take him to the nearest vet clinic
Fortunately, it's not busy and you don't have to wait to see a vet
It turns out that the wound is not deep and will be healed just in a week
What a relief!
(you also find out the the cat is a girl, not a boy)
You buy prescribed ointment with bandages and food for... uh, how should you name the cat?
Hmmm... C/n (cat's name) sounds good!
Now you're free to go home!.. With a pet...
Yeah, you didn't have time to properly think about it
Well, you can't just leave C/n alone on the street now, can you?
So you decide to take her home for now
On the way back you spot the same poster with missing cat again
Waaaaait a minute...
Tama is C/n!
Or C/n is Tama?
Anyway, for the first time in your life you're able to help owners find their pet!
You take the poster because you can't use your phone now
As you get home you organize a corner for Tama: bowls with milk and food (which almost immediately disappears), a box with a soft blanket (Tama really enjoys herself there) and some papers (just in case she wants to go to the toilet)
As for now, you're dealing the phone number given in poster
(and try to ignore your nervousness)
Beep...
... Beep...
....
Beeeeeeep...
...
... Beep...
Bee- "Yeah?" suddenly a man's voice asks
(ah, what a beautiful voice... and strangely familiar)
"U-um, good evening, I call you because I found your cat Tama."
"Oh my god, really?? Thank you so much!!! How is Tama?!"
"She is fine. Well, except for a wound on her leg. But don't worry, it's not serious, the healing process should take around one week."
"Oh, damn it, our poor cat... But thank you again for taking care of her. Where and when can I take her?"
"Well, she's with me at my place and I'm free for the rest of the evening, so if you want to take her back today, you can come whenever you want to."
"Great, I'll head out now. Where do you live?"
"Oh, right! How about I send you it in a message?"
"Yeah, that would be preferable, thanks. Alright, then I'm waiting for the address and heading out. See ya."
"Yeah, see you-" the line goes dead before you can finish your sentence, "soon..."
Sighning, you send the address and turn your attention back to the cat who is peacefully resting in the box
"Did you hear, Tama? Your owner is coming for you," you pet her head, "I know we've met just today, but I kinda got used to you. It's nice to have a pet, especially as chill as you. Heh, who knows, maybe I will even get someone in the future."
Soon a door bell rings
You reach the door, open it and see...
Metal Bat, an S-class hero!
(aka your celebrity crush)
(so that's why his voice seemed familiar on the phone)
(and oh god, he's even more handsome in reality than in the photos)
Metal Bat stares at you with mouth agape (and with a slight blush on his cheeks?), but quickly fixes his composure, clearing his throat
"Uh-h, hey, we're here for our cat, Tama."
We?
You look down and notice a small girl, holding Metal Bat's hand
She must be his little sister
And she has puffy eyes
Aww, poor thing must have been really worried about their cat
"Hello!" she confidently says
"Hey there. Um, please come in. Tama is sleeping now," you point at the cat
"Tama!" she immediately lets go of her brother's hand and rushes to the pet
"Hey, Zenko, wait, we're not at home, you can't just..." he extends his hand to stop his sister, but the little girl is faster
He sighs and looks at you, "Sorry about that. She was really worried about Tama. We both were."
You shrug it off, saying it was fine and reassuring him with sympathy
Both of you continue talking about Tama and how you rescued her while Zenko is hugging and petting the cat (who is still peacefully sleeping with belly upwards)
Metal Bat seems to be nervous (and even blushful?) in the conversation
You find it strange since he is always portrayed as a confident and tough man in the media
Maybe it's just his act? Who knows...
(in fact, he finds you really cute and attractive and has never interacted with girls like this before, that's why he feels anxious while talking to you)
However, his intense gaze (and the fact that you're talking to METAL BAT) makes you squirm too
What exactly is he looking at on your face? Oh god, what if he thinks you're ugly??
(he's actually admiring your beauty)
"We're forever grateful for finding Tama and treating her, seriously. We owe you big time, so is there anything we- I can do to thank you?
("Go on a date with me", you want to say)
"Ah, it's nothing, really! Like I said, I'm happy I could help, we need to take care of little ones."
"Yeah... But," he suddenly pulls something from his pocket and places it in your palm, "please take it."
You feel a big stack of cash in your hand
It's so big that you can barely clench your first
That is a LOT of money
"I... I can't accept that."
"No, take it," Metal Bat wraps his warm hands around yours, "Please, Y/n."
You both stare into each other eyes mesmerized
His hands never leaving yours
(and you love this)
(I'll tell you a secret that he loves it too, hence he doesn't move a muscle)
(moreover, he fights the sudden urge to kiss you)
"I... I just want you to know that I helped because I wanted to, not because of money..." you suddenly speak up
"Of course. Many people wouldn't even take Tama to the vet. So the fact you took care of our cat speaks volumes. We can't thank you enough," he notices that his hands are still on yours and awkwardly, yet reluctantly pulls them away, "Sorry..."
"Ah, it's okay..."
"Onii-chan, let's go home?" Zenko suddenly walks up to both of you
"Ah, yeah, we should get going now."
"Right, let me give you medicine for Tama."
You give a packet with stuff for the pet to Metal Bat since Zenko already holds Tama in her hands
They thank you again and you say bye to each other
Metal Bat seems to want to say something or ask you
But just shakes his head and heads out with his sister
And you're alone at home, processing what just happened
Both feeling pleasantly shocked that you talked to Metal Bat (and he even held your hand) and sad that that's all it was
He's gone now and you will never meet him
If he liked you, he would have asked you out, right?
Or maybe he was just too shy?
Or he simply didn't like you
Maybe he even has a girlfriend
But he wouldn't hold your hand and act like this in that case, would he?
Alright, then it means you just gotta message him and ask him out
Not now, of course
Or maybe just let it go? Maybe you're just delusional
In the end you decide to take a few days to make up your mind
Funny thing is that a couple days after, as you're about to text Metal Bat, you actually receive a message from him (what a coincidence!) :
"Hey, Y/n, it's Metal Bat. I hope you remember me😅 Anyway, I'd like to get to know you better and was wondering if you would like to go on a date with me?"
You firstly think your own eyes deceive you
But then of course you say yes
Bonus:
Badd wasn't interested in dating
And he especially didn't believe in love with a first sight
Though, when you open the door and he sees you
It's like his world turns upside down
You're the most beautiful girl he has ever seen in his life
(yes, he has fangirls, but they don't interest him)
Suddenly his breath catches in his throat, and his heart race speeds up
Oooooh, young hero is immediately attracted to you
That is something he didn't plan
And he falls for you even more while talking to you
(his heart melts when he feels your soft hand in his)
(he definitely can get used to this)
You're gorgeous, kind, funny and adorable
So there is no way you're single
But on the other hand, it wouldn't hurt to try, right?
As he is considering to ask you out before heading out
A thought of not being good enough for you crosses his mind
He's just a dumb guy with a bat, so yeah, he doesn't stand a chance
And just heads off
On the way back to their house, Zenko suddenly asks him a question, "Do you like Y/n, onii-chan?"
"Huh, what?"
"I like her, she is nice. And Tama was comfortable around her too, so it means a lot."
"Yeah, that's true..."
"You looked cute together. So, do you like Y/n?"
"I... Yeah, I think so."
"Then why you didn't ask her out?"
"Because it's probably not mutual."
"But I saw how she looked at you! She definitely liked you!"
"Really? You think so?"
"Yes! Now go back and ask her out!"
"No, Zen, it's not how it works. Too late for that."
"Onii-chan, you baka! You missed your chance!!"
"Well, not entirely. I still have her phone number, right?"
"Hmph, then text her."
"I will, but not now. It's better to do that tomorrow in the evening."
"Why?"
"Because I'm too scared to message her now."
"... Just trust me."
And so the next evening comes and it's time for Badd to message you
But there is a slight problem...
He feels more nervous than he should and can't think of anything good to type
Gladly, Zenko is here to help him
And they spend whole evening on composing his message for you
Though, they finish doing it too late, and Metal Bat has no other choice but to postpone messaging you again
When he finally sends you message next evening, he throws his phone on the table and leans back on the sofа, running his fingers through his hair and letting out deep breath
He finally did it
Now he needs to wait for your respo-
His phone vibrates, signaling that he received a new message
Feeling more nervous than before, he unlocks his phone and reads your reply
And then rereads it again
And again
"Hey😊 Of course I remember you, and yes, I'd love to go on a date with you! What do you have in mind? :)"
He can't believe it
You said yes
(bruh, of course you did)
And now Badd needs to decide what you'll do on the date
Well, crap, he didn't think about that
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Amai Mask is an idol
And of course he has tons of fangirls, either fawning over him or genuinely loving him
Still, he doesn't want to have relationships with his fans
Every fan knows that and yet believes that they can be the one for him
Don't get him wrong, he loves his fans, but it gets overbearing sometimes
And as much as he loves attention and everything that popularity gives him, he still needs time to be alone
To chill in his jacuzzi, watch some TV-show with a glass of wine, eat at his favourite restaurant in a VIP zone
Or to take a walk in the park... which he's doing now
The park has a nice yard with a beautiful fountain in the center of it, bushes with blossoming flowers grow around the perimeter and lovely benches are stated on each side of the yard
In addition, there aren't a lot of people at this place and he almost never gets recognized
The key word: almost
"A-ah! It's you, Amai Mask! I'm your biggest fan!!!" a woman's voice distracts him from enjoying his walk, "Can I get your autograph and photo with you?"
He turns around and sees a woman with bright make-up on her face, wearing a luxurious dress and high heels
"Of course, how can I reject my gorgeous fan?" he fakes his famous smile, fixing his hair, "Though, I don't have a pen, so there can be a problem."
"Thank you! Don't worry, I got everything covered," she pulls out a pen and a small poster with him
His favourite picture of him is printed on the paper
(alright, let's be fair, he loves every picture of him)
Amai Mask signs the poster, poses for a photo and says good-bye to his fans
Now he can continue on with his walk
... And run into his another fan again
Looks like he isn't going to spend his time alone without anyone disturbing him
After dealing with the fangirl, he decides that it's time for him to go home
Yeah, jacuzzi sounds nice now
As he heads out from the park, he feels someone tapping on his shoulder, "Um, excuse me, sir..."
Ugh, not another one
"I'm sorry, sweetheart, as much as I love my fans and would like to give you my autograph, I can't. I have to be somewhere else, so I don't have time," he truns around and fixes his hair, arrogantly closing his eyes, and waves his hand as if dismissing the person
"What, you're so busy that you can't even take your scarf?"
"Huh?" he opens his eyes and sees you, handing him his scarf
Ah, it must have fallen
"Thanks, cutie..." he takes it and notices a rather suspicious figure from the corner of his eyes
A man prepares his camera to take a photo of Amai Mask... and you
Oh no, he knows where this is going
The reporter wants to make gossip about him and you!
Pop idol loves being in the center of attention and using gossip about him to gain more popularity, but for now he can't let that happen
So what to do?
Walk away? No, the reporter will get suspicious that both of you are hiding something
Act like you asked for his autograph and he was about to give it to you? This will work, but there is a risk you won't play along and that will draw even more suspicion
Pretend that he is the one who picked up the scarf? Yeah, it'll make him look good, but again, there'll be a high chance you won't go with the flow
What if you're one of those fans who want to be the center of attention with him?
Well, no matter what, Amai can just threaten the journalist and deal with him this way, but he doesn't want to
So, what to do? He needs to decide now
"Hey, I know this might be strange, but I need you to do something for me, no, for both of us," he whispers, "Just act like you're my fan who asks for my autograph. There is a reporter behind you who is about to film us together in order to publish some scandalous articles. You don't want that, do you?"
You skeptically raise your eyebrow
"Just who he thinks he is?" you ask yourself, "He looks like one of the guys who are too full of themselves and believe that the world resolves around them. ..So maybe it's some kind of prank? They're popular nowadays. Yeah, it must be."
"Ha-ha, very funny," you cross your arms, "And let me guess, the reporter is actually a friend of yours, and he's filming us. If I "play along", you two will upload a compilation of videos with people giving you autographs because you're allegedly a pop star."
Your words are like blades that cut through his ego
"... What? Do you even know who I am?"
"And why should I? I could care less."
Another strike right through his ego
"You know what? I don't have time for that. I've got better things to do than arguing with... you."
Now Sweet Mask strikes back
"..."
"HUUUUUUUUUH?" you suddenly exclaim, "Just who do you think you are to talk like that?!"
"And now you care enough to know who I am, huh?" he smirks
"Actually, no. I know who you are. You are a self-obsessed wannabe pop idol!"
Amai snorts, "Self-obsessed you say? That's rich coming from you."
"Excuse me?"
"Yeah, excuse you. You accuse me of being narcissistic when you're the one who thinks highly of herself, believing that she's so special because she didn't fall for a prank. But in reality, no one even pranked you. What, you're that desperate to be popular on the Internet?"
"What?" you cringe. "You're the desperate one. Otherwise, explain to me why you "warned" me about some reporter and now don't even care about him?"
Oh
He forgot about that
Instantly checking the journalist behind you, Sweet Mask sees him, taking pictures of you two
Great, just great! Everything goes NOT according to his plan
Instead of relaxing and spending time by himself, he has to deal with you and a noisy reporter
Groaning, Amai Mask moves past you and walks up to the man with the camera, starting to deal with him
You turn around and watch the scene
Turns out you were wrong. No one was pranking you. You in fact talked to the famous pop idol – Sweet Mask! And he was indeed right about the journalist
Well, this is embarassing
Should you do something? Or just walk away?
While you're contemplating what to do next, you glance at Amai Mask and start examining him
He is tall, muscular... and handsome
Damn, he is attractive, awfully attractive
And why is he kinda-
Wait, what are you even thinking about?
You walk to two men only to see the reporter literally fleeing from Amai Mask's wrath... and coldness?
It's a bit freezing when you approach him, maybe it was wind? Doesn't matter now, the cold is gone anyway
"Um, so..."
"So," he crosses his arms and stares at you
"... I'm sorry."
For a moment, there is a hint of surprise on his face, but it immediately fades away, turning back into annoyance
"I just had a shitty day and sorta lashed it out on you. That was wrong of me. Sorry again."
He keeps staring at you with crossed arms over his chest
You can't really read his gaze
Is he examining you? Cursing you? Waiting for you to say something? Battling between forgiving you or staying mad at this whole situation?
As you start walking away, he calls out to you, "A shitty day you say?"
"Uh, yeah," you turn back to him
"I'm not having a good day either. So..." he gets closer to you, "It looks like we both need to blow some steam off, to just chill and relax, huh?"
"Damn right. I just want to flop onto my bed and do nothing."
"I feel you. Though I was wondering something."
"Mmm?"
"How about we talk again when we have a good day? Or we can meet up to make our days better?"
Woah, what? Is he asking you out?
"I thought you hated me?"
"What gave you that vibe? My retorts? Well, it's only fair to treat others the same way they treat you. Besides, I like your feisty personality and pretty looks."
Wow, that's suspiciously unexpected
What if he is a playboy and wants to use you?
There were a few rumors about him and his one-night stands back then
Seeing your troubled face, Amai Mask clears his throat, "And no, it's not a prank or something like that. I'm serious. It'd be a shame if I missed an opportunity to get closer to you and regretted it later."
Ah, to hell with this! We live only once, right?
"I'm glad to know so. But you know what? Let's try and see where the future leads us."
Pop idol smirks, "Good answer. Here is a card with my phone number, please send a first message with your... name. Huh, I can't believe I still didn't ask it."
"It's Y/n."
"Y/n, huh? It suits you. Well, of course it does, a pretty name for a pretty girl. ..As cheesy as it sounds."
"Thank you," you smile at the compliment, taking his business card
"So, see you later then, Y/n."
The way he says your name makes your heart flutter for some reason
"Yeah, see you!"
"Looking forward to our date, and don't worry, I won't disappoint you," he winks at you and starts walking away
Okay...
What the hell just happened?!
And why is your heart beating so fast?
Bonus:
Sweet Mask instantly finds you beautiful
Which is already enough for him to understand that you're special
(you are my special... sorry, wrong fandom)
But what attracts him more is that you talk back to him
Of course you're not the first nor the last one to do this
However, he somehow feels entertained while arguing with you
Well, alright, mostly pissed, but amused too
Amai usually doesn't really bother bickering with others: he simply doesn't have time for that and has better things to do than waste his precious time on "idiots"
But since he does continue his quarrel with you, he realizes there's another thing he likes about you: the way you stand up to him and your witty comments
He's really interested in hearing more of your remarks
When he's done threatening the poor reporter and hears your apology, he's surprised for a second because he didn't take you as someone who would be sorry for their behavior
You managed to surprise him again
That's how Sweet Mask understands that he can't just let you go, that he is interested in you
So he decides to take a shot
And it's not like you'll reject him because...
He is Sweet Mask after all
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