#“Whats cooking good looking?” *looking into a mirror*
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a/n: some more jinwoo headcanons #needthat :P
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boyfriend!jinwoo who absolutely melts under your touch, any stress he’s harboring in his shoulders dissipates the second he comes home to you
boyfriend!jinwoo who is so smitten with you he finds himself wanting to come home to you every hour of the day, even finding himself at your job at random times because there was an ‘urgent matter’ he needed to discuss with you, even pulling the s rank card at times to get to you (he just wanted to see you and ask if you needed anything from the grocery store)
boyfriend!jinwoo who didn’t mind you teasing him, always having a small smile on his face when you tried to playful fight or wrestle with him, he was always gentle with you, making sure to keep his strength in check
boyfriend!jinwoo who would flip you under him and pin your wrists to the ground in the blink of an eye when you were being too bratty for his liking, his eyes glowing as he hovered over you, “you done sweetheart?”
boyfriend!jinwoo who blushes SO profusely anytime he finds you staring at him shirtless or in his boxers, he gets so shy under your gaze and his face flushes a deep pink color “w-what? do i have something on me?” he asks, trying to catch a glance of himself in the mirror only for you to shake your head no, “you’re just good to look at” you tease
boyfriend!jinwoo who picks you up and carries you around like you weight nothing, especially when you’re being stubborn about something he’s not above simply picking you up and throwing you over his shoulder
boyfriend!jinwoo who is too attractive for his own good, not realizing just how hot he was and flashing a smile out of kindness to a girl at the bar, you roll your eyes at him when he turns around, grabbing your things and walking out of the bar
“doll what’s wrong?” he’s quick to follow after you, when you don’t stop he’s standing in front of you in a flash, causing you to walk into his toned chest. before you can walk around him he’s got both your hands in his, “don’t walk away from me, talk to me my love”
boyfriend!jinwoo who leaves beru with you when he has to be far from you, beru quickly takes a liking to you after seeing how happy his liege was with you, when jinwoo summons him back he feels a little sad, telling jinwoo he would be more than happy to keep guard of you again, even managing to slip in how you were the only one fit enough for someone such as his highness
boyfriend!jinwoo who loves cooking for you, making you your favorite dishes and comfort foods. he loves having you sit on the counter next to him in one of his t shirts, letting you try everything and getting your input (you always think it’s perfect)
boyfriend!jinwoo who seems so stoic and emotionless in public, but is a ball of happiness and softness with you behind closed doors, warm eyes and soft gentle touches reserved just for you
the world would never know that sung jinwoo practically purrs when you run your fingers through his hair, gently scratching his scalp. only you would ever know the quiet whine he lets out when you kiss his sharp jawline. only you would ever know the sound of his giggles when you place a flurry of kisses on his face. only you would get to see the love sick look on his face when you catch him staring at you randomly during domestic moments.
boyfriend!jinwoo who reserves the sweetest part of himself for only you <3
#sung jinwoo fluff#sung jinwoo imagine#sung jinwoo x reader#sung jinwoo x reader fluff#sung jinwoo headcanons#sung jinwoo fanfic#jinwoo sung x reader#jinwoo sung x you#sung jinwoo x you#jinwoo sung fluff#solo leveling imagine#solo leveling x reader#sung jin woo x reader
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🖤 ── 𝐿osing 𝒜ll 𝑀y 𝐼nnocence 𝐼n 𝒯he 𝐵ackseat
bttm!male reader x top!mingi (ateez)
in which after a heated club night, mingi teaches his best friend how to have sex !
content warning: gay sex, oral sex, anal sex, mingi's first time topping, virgin!reader / reader's first time, car sex, dacryphilia (?), fingering, size kink, unprotected sex (don't irl !), non-idol au (?) implied second round
lmk if there are any more :p
loosely inspired by addison rae's diet pepsi <33
author's note: hi everyonee !! tysm for all the love on the jiwoong fic, and im back with an anon req, sorry if this took too long im kinda busy with life :p. i wrote this in 3rd person instead of 2nd person this time so reading this might be diff from the first one. this is my first time writing for mingi so i hope its realistic lmao 😭
also mingichella ruined my life.
! MINORS DNI !
"So, where are we going?" y/n asked, curiosity laced in his tone. Currently he was sitting in front of the mirror, legs folded on the hotel room carpet as he dabbed a brush with black eyeshadow on the outer corners of his eyes, brushing through his black tresses, moving silky strands out of his eyes. "You randomly just told me to get ready without telling me anything..."
Y/n could hear shuffling around the hotel room. From the corner of his eyes he could see Mingi shuffling through his coats and leather jackets hanging in all their black and grey glory, waiting to be picked by him to go out in the cigarette-and-chanel no.5-smelling streets of new york.
You and Mingi were finally taking your "best friends" trip that the both had you been raving about since you learned about the existence of New York City. You could tell in Mingi's smirk that he was planning something, and you were scared what he was cooking up in that mischevious head of his.
"Should I just go bare-chested?" Mingi asked, from one corner of the hotel room, out of view from the mirror you peered into, searching for his face. You turned around from where his voice came.
Mingi ruffled his freshly dyed platinum-blonde hair, an impulse decision he made yesterday, claiming that it "would look hot". His leather pants stretched and wrinkled across his long legs and thighs with perfection, glistening under the harsh blindingness of the white hotel room lights. A black jacket draped his torso, with sparkling chains and necklaces adorning his neck. As he cheekily stated, it was obvious he was wearing no shirt underneath, a tackily zipped-up zipper threatening to reveal his lower torso and abs.
Y/n rolled his eyes, barely containing a gasp out of pure shock. "Fuckin' slut." he says, his tone laced with sarcasm. "It's a good outfit, but I don't know where we're going to, so I can't place you on the cunt-o-meter just yet."
Mingi raised an eyebrow. "Cunt-o-meter?"
Y/n rolled his eyes. "How much cunt you're serving. Depends on the occasion you're serving all this for." he says, eyes scanning over his 6 foot frame.
"Trust me, we need maximum point on the cunt-o-meter." Mingi cringed as the words came out his mouth, muttering a small "whatever that means."
"Well then, you're good to go, then!" Y/n says cheerily, his words accompanied by a quick "click!" of his makeup palette closing up. He fluttered his eyelids to show off his "edgy" eye look he was planning. "How do I look?"
Mingi smirked. "I like it, you look like a pretty boy." He giggled, showing off his gummy smile that made y/n heart skip a beat at his cuteness, despite how the other was dressed right now. Y/n got up, awkwardly twirling around to show off his outfit.
"Now, unlike you I am not a slut and do infact have self respect. How do I look?" Y/n's outfit was moderately simple - an oversized black sweater he borrowed from Mingi, with denim shorts cheekily teasing at his thighs, and the white knee-lenghts he was seemingly obsessed with.
At this, Mingi wrapped an arm around the shorter's shoulders, his arm seemingly overtaking his entire figure. He smiled. "Let's go."
timeskip
"Alright, that was the first and last time I'm going clubbing with your ass." Y/n groaned, practically collasping into the passenger seat of a somehow sober Mingi's car. Mingi giggled at his friend, who was currently rolling his eyes and proudly displaying him a middle finger. "And why didn't you tell me we were gonna go clubbing? I would've dressed sluttier!" Y/n whined.
"Wearing what, exactly?" Mingi raised an eyebrow in a cocky fashion. "You're scared to go to the pool shirtless. Heck, you can't even wear tank tops in front of me!" He teased. Mingi laughed at y/n's reaction, which was now both middle fingers being stretched in front of his face.
"Whatever. Atleast I don't have the lack of self respect that I let myself being tossed around between 4 guys !" Y/n exclaimed, pointing to Mingi's smudged lipgloss.
"Well, atleast I don't sit in the corner despite half the club trying to flirt with me!" Mingi replied with the same snarky tone. "And I remember that I don't own the glasses!"
"Song Mingi, I'm gonna kill you- and I didn't end up taking the glass with me, did I?" but Y/n's counterattack was ignored.
Mingi had a sinister look on his face. "You had atleast 5 guys foaming at the mouth to take you home, and yet you complain about being single." He smirked with a look of intrigue. "Could it be..." He leaned in closer to y/n till he ear brushed against his pink lips. "You don't know how to have sex, y/n?"
The flustered look on Y/n's face confirmed his suspicions. "Eyes on the road, idiot!" Y/n retaliated, causing Mingi to smirk as he continued driving.
"So, your innocent ass doesn't know how to fuck? How surprising for someone as freaky as you."
"Just keep driving or I'll cannibalize you."
Mingi's car suddenly came to a hault in some dark corner, in some street that seemed nowhere near the streets you memorized on the way to your hotel. Mingi leaned in closer, inhaling the smell of alcohol and your sweet perfume mixed with sweat that lingered on his sweater, currently draping your figure.
"Mingi, where are w-"
"Backseat. Now."
"What the fu-"
"Now."
smut below, minors dni.
"M-mingi, fuck!" Y/n's cheek was flush against the leather seat covers. In the darkness of the night. His shorts were thown away somewhere in the process, windows fogged up, the air conditioner's cool wind sending chills down Y/n bottom and thighs.
Mingi thrust his fingers in Y/n's hole scissoring him in an attempt to loosen up. Y/n's legs found their way to Mingi's shoulders, resting on them as Mingi held onto Y/n's thighs for dear life, imprinting the cool metal designs of Mingi's rings into the shorter's inner thighs. "Fuck, y/n, you're so tight~" He cooed, loving the whimpers that spilled out of the other's mouth. He didn't even bother taking off the other's pants, or his own, even. Mingi was impaitent to get to the good part immediately, simply choosing to unzip his zipper.
He trailed kisses down your neck - hot, open-mouthed kisses, leaving bites and marks across your collarbone and neck, nuzzling his hot face against the crook of your neck. "So responsive..." he groaned. "f I knew you made all those slutty sounds I would've wrecked you long ago..."
His words sent shivers down your spine. You didn't even have time to recollect yourself when Mingi pulled his fingers out, giving you a maximum of 5 seconds to relaxation before he forced his length into you. It wasn't the most girthy dick, but god, was it long and strong. You felt every individual vein, pumping up hard and fast into his erection. Mingi practically shreiked when you clenched around his lenght, hard and tight.
"God damn, so eager to get railed. I might just top more often." Mingi groaned, his voice hoarse and deep. He experimentally began thrusting in and out at a slow and then fast pace. His inconsistency drove you insane: He was trying you out, trying to see what got the best reaction from you.
That's when it happened: His dick slammed into your prostate, targetting a sensetive bundle of nerves. You twitched so hard you were surprised you didn't just cum right then and there. Mingi noticed your blissed-out expression and loud moan. He smirked. "You like that, pretty boy? Ya like when I slam into you like that?" You nodded desperately.
"Lemme do it again, then." A wicked smile adorned his face. And he did. Over and over, slamming down on your sweet spot. Estcasy claimed over you so many times as your velvet walls clamped down on his member. Both of you groaned in unison. Being on the edge of pleasure was so blaringly good that you didn't even realize when you tipped over, letting out velvet white ropes of your substance, coating Mingi and yourself.
"Cum for me, boy~" Mingi cooed, as he too, filled you with his load, blissfully rolling his eyes back as he bit his lip, riding out his high. His substance inside you was an intoxicating feeling. You never wanted it to end.
Mingi rested his forehead against yours, panting. "Let's continue this in the hotel." He smirked, and you nodded.
It was going to be a long night.
#kpop x male reader#ateez x male reader#mingi x male reader#bttm male readet#dom idol#mlm#gay#kpop male reader#mingi#ateez#ateez hard hours#mingi hard hours#mingi smut#mingi x reader#you x mingi#💌 niko yapping
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Maybee insecure reader x donna?? Ome day reader went to the village to do some shopping unfortunately she met some mean boys there who started commenting on her body and her purchases. Reader comes home crying which worries Donna. Reader locks herself up and stops eating. One evening Donna find reader crying again and confronts her
A lot of fluff at the end pleaseee!!
Yess!!!! I'm sorry about the plot twist, I know you didn't ask me to do it but, seriously, I couldn't help it!! Anyway, thank you for your request! I hope you like it and sorry about the language mistakes!!! :)))))
False complexes
Pairing: Donna Beneviento x Fem! Reader
Warnings: Angst, fluff, hurt & comfort, unexpected plot twist I'm sorry, some eating disorders...
Word count: 7,503
Summary: You hated looking yourself in the mirror that morning...
N/A: Sorry about the language mistakes!!! Requests are open!!! I'm waiting yours!!! I love you all!!! Well, I have to say that: Be careful with those complexes. Be healthy, and be yourselves, always! All the bodies are beautiful!!!
“Oh, come on,” you protested as you tried to tie your dress.
Turning around a little, you looked at yourself in the mirror to check if the garment you had chosen was really as tight as it seemed. Your hands ran over your hips, your belly and your gaze darkened a little. The echoes of the past began to sound in your mind like a distant and mocking whisper, but before they could be heard more clearly, some hands on your waist calmed them down.
“Donna,” you sighed with a tender smile, noticing how the dollmaker's hands hugged you subtly while her lips rested on your cheek.
“Mm?” the brunette murmured. “Tutto bene?”
“What? Oh, yes,” you answered amused, leaning your body on hers slowly, letting yourself be impregnated by the scent of lavender that always accompanied her. “I was wondering if… this dress looks good on me.”
“The dress?” Donna asked, frowning. “What's wrong with it?”
“Nothing, it's just that it looks very… tight,” you sighed, concentrating on your reflection, to which Donna imitated your gesture. “You don't think so?”
“Mm,” the lady answered dryly, shaking her head and capturing your lips in a mischievous way. “You look beautiful, tesoro.”
“Okay, okay,” you said amused, trying to escape from her addictive kisses. “Hey, Donna, I have, I have to go”
“No, stay,” your girlfriend whispered to you seductively, turning your body and tying your waist tightly. “Stay.”
“Tempting,” you whispered, biting your lip and resting your hands on her chest. “But I can't, Donna, I have to pick up the cake.”
The lady in black moved away with a gesture of surrender.
“I still don't understand why you have to order a cake from those villagers, I can make it much better,” she said, cooling her gaze. “You know I don't like you going to the village alone and…”
“Donna,” you said with a stern, firm tone, putting your hands on your hips. “What did we say about jealousy?”
The woman tensed and looked away, crossing her arms.
“It’s not jealousy,” she said in a childish tone. “Remember that you were dizzy yesterday, I don’t want anything to happen to you.”
“Yesterday?” you asked. “Oh, yeah, well… you know, playing hide and seek with Angie makes anyone dizzy,” you concluded, downplaying it and leaving the bedroom.
“I could make a better cake,” Donna said, comically following you through the dark basement hallways.
“Honey,” you said, stopping abruptly and planting a soft kiss on her lips to silence any further protests. “Going out for some fresh air it’s good.”
“Ma…,” she protested, silenced again by your eager, tender lips.
“It's our anniversary,” you said with a calm sigh, caressing her cheek, suppressing a giggle. “It wouldn't be right for you to spend the morning cooking.”
“Certo,” the lady finally said, giving in to your weak arguments. “But, hey, (Y/N).”
“Mm?”
“Be careful, okay? I don't like you going out,” she whispered, ashamed of her nerves, of her somewhat absurd worries. Luckily, you were quite used to her behavior.
“I always be,” you joked, winking at the lady as you walked out the front door and felt the cutting cold of that place calm your discomfort. “Hey, wait, wait,” you said amused, running back into her arms, kissing her before calmly retreating.
Donna laughed blushingly and, as always when you left the house, she kept watching you until you turned the corner that led to the elevator, ready for a day of shopping in the village.
You were never a self-confident girl, you never believed in yourself or believed you were worthy of love or affection.
You remembered looking with some envy at the maids of the castle, looking at their perfect bodies, their uniforms dancing as they walked and dreaming, one day, of being like them. The lack of friends and sadness made you overweight and, for a girl like you, that was your downfall.
The mockery and laughter still remained in the depths of your mind, and although you managed to get out of there, keep yourself healthy with great effort, and start to stop listening to those mockeries, they would never disappear completely.
At 20 years old, you were a shy girl, but with enough confidence to stop listening to the laughter of your classmates and start to live far from the past. Your body wasn’t the most perfect, but you felt good about yourself.
Maybe that somewhat changing attitude was what attracted her attention.
At the masses in honor of the Black Gods you were just a villager looking for her place in that depressing village, but you were never alone. The Four Lords and Mother Miranda were always there, to remind you why you prayed, why you needed them. Of course when you were a girl you believed what the priestess said, you believed that everyone had salvation, that the Gods could help you, but it wasn’t like that.
No God helped you. Boredom and the feeling of obligation in those horrible masses made you distract yourself, starting to analyze the figures in front of you instead of listening to Mother Miranda's words. Dimitrescu, Heisenberg, Moreau, Beneviento; four founding families and four descendants who were chosen by the Gods.
Each one was stranger than the last, but there was one... a woman dressed in black that your eyes began to focus on for longer than usual.
Donna Beneviento, the youngest of them, was mysterious, captivating; a slender and gloomy figure which always remained silent, despite the sinister living doll she always carried in her arms.
Day after day you looked for new details in her dress, in the veil that covered her face, in her apparently soft hands, in her pale skin. Your observations were written down in your mind, and they waited to be completed, to know what was behind that black veil, behind that silent woman.
Of course, you weren’t as discreet as you thought, and one day, she approached you. Despite your logical fear of that situation, you remained calm while that doll, Angie, questioned you about your tireless glances.
Your clumsy response didn’t generate a punishment or a threat, but an invitation, an invitation to have tea that would be the beginning of your new life.
Donna was a strange woman, extremely quiet and shy, watching you through her veil. It was weird at first, but soon you got used to her silent gaze, her soft words and her hoarse voice, you got too used to it.
Love came like a miracle into your life, two years ago, two years since that first kiss, the revelation of her face, her beauty. She was a terribly beautiful woman. The scar on her face and the gifts the Gods gave her weren’t important to you.
At first the dollmaker was possessive, jealous, claiming you as hers whenever she could, but you didn't blame her for it. Despite that, and the illness of her mind, you discovered something wonderful in the dollmaker, the woman of your life.
“Good morning,” you said as you entered the old bakery.
The woman who served the customers greeted you with a bow that made you frown, but to which you were already accustomed.
“My lady,” she said, to which you rolled your eyes, approaching casually.
“Mrs. Dinovic, you don't have to treat me that way,” you said amused, shaking your head. “I'm just (Y/N), the same old (Y/N).”
“Of course,” the woman said, nodding uncertainly. “Forgive me, (Y/N). I'm just not used to… Well, to…”
“Bah, don't give it any importance,” you said, interrupting yet another apology, an apology that deep down, you adored. “Do you have my order?”
“Of course, (Y/N),” she nodded, taking a wrapped cake that she put on the counter, and which you gave an anxious look to while rubbing your hands. “Are you celebrating something?”
“Yes,” you said satisfied, grabbing the package carefully. “Today marks two years since I moved in with Donna.”
“Oh, um… congratulations,” the old lady said shyly. “I'm glad to see that you're happy, you deserve it.”
“Is that chocolate over there?” you asked, irrationally attracted to some bars that stood out on a shelf.
“The Duke has provided us new outdoor items. According to him, it's the best chocolate in the world,” the baker stated, handing you one of the bars.
“The Duke thinks that anything he sells is the best in the world,” you sighed amused, looking at the bar. “But... you've convinced me, I'll take a couple of them. Tell me how much everything is.”
“Gods, it's a gift (Y/N),” the old woman said, with an almost fearful look that made you sigh and roll your eyes again.
“No way,” you stated, taking a bag of coins out of your bag. “Would you dare to refuse Lady Beneviento’s money?” you joked, leaving the bag on the counter.
The woman laughed and shook her head.
“Good point, (Y/N),” she finally sighed, taking the money. “By the way…”
“Yes?”
“Y-You look good, sweetie,” she commented, making a genuine smile appear on your face.
Maybe the tight dress thing was an exaggeration.
“Thank you, Mrs. Dinovic,” you said goodbye, taking the cake and the chocolate bars, comically maneuvering to be able to carry everything.
Walking back to the mansion, you felt a heat in your cheeks as you thought about that compliment, deciding to open some chocolate, which, for some reason, you really wanted.
“Damn Duke, he's right,” you said with your mouth full, delighting in the sweet taste of the chocolate as you walked, approving his products. “I have to tell Donna to order more, of… oh, boy,” you lamented when one of the bars fell to the snowy ground.
Clumsily you bent down to pick it up, noticing a certain discomfort in your back that you didn't have before. As you approached your target, a quick hand pulled it out of your reach.
“Did you lose something, (Y/N)?” a male voice said, one you recognized long before you stood up again.
It was one of your nightmares, one of the boys who laughed at you when you were younger, the last person you wanted to see at that moment.
“Well, thank you,” you said without looking him in the eyes, trying to retrieve the chocolate, which the boy mockingly pushed away. “Oh, come on…”
“You want this, Moby? I assumed so,” he said, laughing amused, but interrupted by his friend, who made a face of terror.
“Sergei, leave her alone,” his partner said, with an apologetic look. “Come on, give it back to her.”
“So she can break the size record?” the bully continued mockingly, while you began to tremble. “Eating too much chocolate is bad, (Y/N). I think you should know it.”
“Dude, stop it, don't you know where she lives?” his friend insisted, handing you the chocolate quickly and urging the boy to go away.
“At the chocolate factory apparently, isn't that right, Charlie?” Sergei mocked.
You were speechless. You may have forgotten about your past fears, your complexes, but you weren't ready to face them again, you never were.
“Leave her alone or that crazy Beneviento will come for us,” the other said, whispering in a too loud voice.
“Hey, don't mess with Donna,” you said without thinking, earning a loud laugh from the bully, who elbowed his partner.
“Yes, Iulian, don't mess with her. Beneviento is too busy enlarging the doors of her house to fit (Y/N), isn't it?” he hissed with a sinister look, still laughing.
“Shut up,” you growled, gritting your teeth and destroying one of the bars with your hands.
“What do you have there? Is that a cake? I'm sure it's just an appetizer, right?” the boy continued, making tears slowly begin to form in your eyes. “You eat many cakes a day, don't you? Look at you, you barely fit into that dress.”
“Sergei,” his friend protested, pulling his arm again. “Do you want to die?”
“Stop worrying. I'm sure that by the time the fatty gets to the mansion, we'll have had time to escape, don't you think, piggy?” he dragged out his words slowly, making them land right on your chest, which was rising and falling very fast, too fast.
“Shut up!” you shouted furiously, turning around to escape from that horrible situation, a situation that was too common in your childhood and that you didn't want to relive.
“That's it, run, piggy! But leave us some chocolate, don't eat it all!” Sergei shouted, his voice getting weaker the further away you went.
You were nervous and terribly hurt, too much to think clearly. As you walked, on the way to your shelter, with Donna, you thought about those hurtful words, about your insecurity from a while ago in front of the mirror. You knew you couldn't believe the words of that stupid villager, but something inside you repeated them constantly.
Before continuing, shedding several tears in the snow, you stopped in front of an old truck, looking at your body in one of the rearview mirrors.
Your face, red from the cold and crying, seemed to have a rounder appearance than some time ago and your belly seemed to be pressed much more against the fabric of the dress, as did your chest. Was he right?
It had been a long time since you banished your complexes, you changed your life to feel better. You kept yourself in a healthy shape and a fairly balanced diet. You didn't understand why your body was playing such a trick on you, why it was increasingly far from being attractive.
Looking at yourself in the reflection increased your crying and the speed at which you returned to the old estate, with tears and laments being your only companions.
“It's about time, silly,” the Angie doll said with a demanding pose as you entered the mansion, your face hurt by tears and an irrational trembling in your hands. “What have you brought?”
“Angie, leave me alone,” you sobbed, hanging up your coat and checking the cake had survived your frustration.
“Hey, hey, hey!” the doll snapped at you. “What's wrong with your face?”
Taking that as an attack rather than a remark due to your obvious tears, you let out a pitiful moan, shaking your head and heading towards the elevator hallway, closely followed by Angie.
“Hey, silly, I’m talking to you! Did you bring me yarn?” the doll insisted, comically tugging at your dress to slow your steps. “Hey, don’t ignore me, you silly villager!”
“Angie, leave me alone!” you shrieked, opening the door and shaking the leg the doll had grabbed. “Leave me alone, okay?”
“Ugh, stupida,” the puppet hissed, comically walking away with a cocky pose. “You’re unbearable!”
“Whatever,” you sighed as you pressed the button, going down to the basement.
Already in the kitchen, you left the cake on the counter and lowered your head, letting out an intense but discreet cry, one that of course, Donna noticed right away.
“(Y/N)?” she asked, peeking through the door and changing her expression when she saw you lamenting. “Tesoro…”
“Donna, not now, okay?” you said, removing the hands that held your face and wiped away your tears. “Donna, let me go, please…”
“Why are you crying?” she asked, exerting more force in her grip, starting to get nervous because of your attitude.
“Nothing, it's nothing, okay?” you lied, shaking your head and turning your back to the lady, taking the opportunity to pretend while you put the groceries in the fridge.
“Va bene, but, but… (Y/N), amore mio…” the lady in black sighed grabbing your wrist before you ran away again, hurting you.
“Donna, let me go, you hurt me,” you protested, childishly breaking free from her grip and leaving her with her eye wide open and her hands starting to shake. “It's nothing, okay?”
“Sono preoccupata per te, tesoro,” she sighed with an intense look, managing to drag your body close to hers. “You're crying, why are you crying? Did something happen in the village?”
“No,” you answered dryly, wiping your tears on your own and shaking your head. “Nothing happened in the village, okay?”
“You’re lying,” Donna said, her tone accusatory, a tone that revealed she didn’t believe you at all. “What happened? Answer me.”
“I told you nothing happened,” you said, a senseless anger slowly invading you.
“You're lying to me, why are you lying to me!?” the lady said, furious, stamping the floor with her shoe like a little girl. “You're hiding something from me.”
“You know what, Donna? I don't feel like listening to you, nor am I in the mood to put up with your stupid jealousy, so…” you said with an indifferent tone, with the blood boiling in your veins. “I'm going to read.”
“Jealousy? Do you think I'm jealous?” she asked, grabbing your wrist again, digging her nails into your skin. “(Y/N), please… I just, I just want to know if anyone has done anything to you.”
You stopped with a gasp, feeling more tears spilling down your cheeks as you shook your head.
“No one has done anything to me,” you lied without looking at your girlfriend's face, trying with all your might to relax.
“You know you can tell me,” the brunette insisted, cupping your face in her hands, something that made you more nervous.
Your face was rounded, imperfect; she would notice, for sure.
“No, I... no, okay? Everything is fine,” you said with a forced tone, lowering her hands, pushing away her tender caresses.
“I-If someone has hurt you... I... they will... pay for it...” she said haltingly, breathing with difficulty. “I will kill everyone who hurts you, (Y/N), I swear, I...”
“Basta, Donna,” you said with a firm tone, crossing your arms and stopping crying immediately. “I don't need you to do anything for me, okay? I can defend myself, is that clear? Just forget about your murderous madness and leave me alone, can you do that? Can you just leave me alone for a fucking minute?” you snapped, growling and storming out of the kitchen, hitting the shoulder of the lady in black in the process.
“Ma, ma… what have I done?” she muttered before you disappeared.
Luckily, she didn't follow you.
In the solitude of the bedroom, you let the tears and frustration run through you mockingly. The mirror near the closet watched you, looked at you mockingly, looked at your imperfect, swollen body, the tight seams around your waist, your breasts…
“Damn it,” you protested, hitting the mattress and getting up to change your clothes.
It really didn't help you. In the reflection, your body kept laughing at you, your rounded face kept telling you that you were horrible, that Donna would never love you looking like that.
Naturally you weren't going to give up. You had to find a solution to that old problem and above all, try not to take it out on poor Donna.
She knew about your past, about the teasing of your classmates, and she always listened and supported you but fear is irrational. Anger, sadness, laughter... all those contradictory feelings began to haunt you for the rest of the day.
Donna didn’t deserve that attitude. She didn’t deserve to be ignored just because you didn’t dare to talk about what happened.
Talking about it would be reliving it, reliving your traumas, your complexes. Remaining silent was your best option, locking yourself away was the only valid solution you found.
That day you didn’t go up to have lunch; you stayed lamenting in the bedroom, alone, with the only company of the teasing of your past, of that day that had started horribly wrong. But there was something you couldn’t avoid, the special dinner with Donna, the dinner that celebrated your two years together.
“You don't like it?” the lady asked, apparently oblivious to what had happened hours ago, to your absence during the lunch.
Sometimes Donna surprised you. She was always a bit pushy, but mysteriously, when you needed some room, she left you alone. She was a wonderful woman. You didn't want to be rude, you wanted to please her.
“I love it, darling,” you said with a fake smile, playing with your food. “Donna, I don't fancy wine,” you added with an unpleasant grimace as you saw the bottle tilt towards your glass.
“I thought you liked it,” Donna said, frowning, but obeying your request. “It's your favorite, (Y/N), I bought it for you.”
“I know but… I don't fancy it, Donna,”
Of course, wine wasn’t your best ally at that dinner, you had to remain calm, to be able to control your anxiety and not devour the delicious plate of pasta that Donna had prepared for you.
“Okay,” she said, nodding with a shy smile and lighting a candle that had gone out due to the movement. “W-Wait, are you done?” she asked again, watching you push the plate away from you.
“Ugh,” you snorted, pretending to be full, caressing your belly comically. “I'm not hungry anymore, Donna, but it was delicious.”
“Um, but…” she stammered, looking at the food. “It's almost whole, (Y/N), and you haven't eaten, you should…”
“Donna,” you said with a serious, dark tone. “It's our anniversary dinner, I'd like for once, just for once, that you stop telling me what to do, okay, honey?” you hissed furiously, but controlling your tone.
Donna nodded slowly, sad and confused by your attitude, one that you instantly regretted.
“You’re acting weird,” the lady commented after an awkward silence. “Tell me, what have I done wrong?”
“You haven't done anything wrong, Donna,” you answered instantly, shaking your head and looking with shining eyes at your unfinished plate. “Everything is fine.”
“No, nothing is fine, (Y/N),” Donna contradicted you, gently grabbing your hand. “I see sadness in your eyes, I hear it in your words, please, tesoro, talk to me, what's wrong?”
“It's not…” you began, hesitating whether to tell her what had happened, doubting whether you really needed her comfort. “It's not the best day of my life, that's all,” you finished, looking away and holding back a tear.
“I… I'm sorry, (Y/N),” she whispered, getting up and walking around the table, crouching in front of you and gently grabbing your hands. “Tell me, is there anything I can do for you?”
You smiled tenderly, blushing at the ventriloquist's gentlemanly attitude, a very distant one with the rumors that were in the village about her. If only they knew her well…
“You're a sweetheart, Donna,” you whispered, accepting her caresses and looking into her bright eye. “But I don't need anything.”
“Mm…” Donna murmured, kissing your hands and staying thoughtful. “I'm sure the cake cheers you up, vero?” she said, getting up and starting to cut that delicious cake.
“Um, no, I…” you denied, knowing that eating something so sweet wouldn't improve your problem, that you had to resist the temptation.
“Chocolate always cheers you up,” she said, serving you a piece with a smile that couldn't hide her nervousness. “Try.”
“No, I don’t feel like it,” you denied, looking away and dragging your chair a little. “I’m… I’m tired, Donna, I’d like to go to bed.”
“But, but it’s your favorite cake and…” she said, blinking erratically, watching you get up from the chair. “It’s still very early and I would like, I would like us to do something together.”
“As you wish, but in the bedroom,” you said with a tired voice and a sad, but mischievous smile.
Donna smiled, nodding effusively and accompanying you to the elevator. Luckily, you knew what to do to dissuade the lady from her constant attempts to cheer you up. You also held out some hope that some nighttime activity would make you forget. Usually, it always did.
But, it was definitely not your best day.
The kisses echoed in the old bedroom, the caresses on your skin tore through the air with a melodic breeze and your eyes only showed tenderness, love, passion. Her hands wandered through your skin, through your clothes, while her lips rested on yours fiercely, wanting to conquer what had long been hers.
Her thin and cautious fingers traced the outline of your waist and, for some reason, that made you open your eyes and put your hands on her chest.
“Wait,” you whispered with a hoarse voice, moving away from her body. “Let… let me…” you murmured nervously, approaching the lamp on the bedside table and turning it off.
“What are you doing?” the brunette asked when darkness dominated the cold room, turning on the light again. “What's wrong?”
“Well, I thought that without light it could be more… mysterious, don't you think?” you joked, attracting her again to your kisses and taking your hand out from underneath, bringing it closer to the switch.
“But, but I want to see you,” Donna protested, pulling away from your kisses with a pleading look, panting as she began to dominate your neck with her lips. “I want to see how beautiful you are.”
“No, you don't want to,” you said, abruptly moving away from the brunette, pushing her to the side. “Turn off the light, Donna.”
“What are you saying?” she asked, offended by your reaction. “What do you mean I don't want to see you?”
“Nothing,” you lied, shrugging. “I prefer the dark, darling, come on…” you said with an impatient tone.
“No, no, no, no way. Let me see you, please… I want to look at you while I make love to you,” the lady said with a caress on your cheek, placing her hips on yours again.
“Donna,” you protested as she continued, ignoring an innocent request that, for you, wasn't so innocent. “Donna, stop,” you growled, pushing the lady away from your body again. “If it's not in the dark, I don't want to do it.”
“What's wrong with you?” the brunette asked, breathing heavily, frowning and starting to lose control of her emotions.
“It's just that...” you hissed, trying to calm down. You couldn't let poor Donna suffer a crisis because of you, because of your horrible body. “Nothing, nothing's wrong.”
“Y-You're making me nervous, (Y/N), this morning...” she said, whispering, playing with the sheets. “What happened in the village?”
“I already told you that nothing happened!” you shrieked, making the woman back away, scared by your behavior.
“(Y/N)…”
“We better try to get some sleep,” you said, turning over and covering yourself with the sheets, closing your eyes and hiding a tear.
Donna didn't answer. She simply groaned in frustration and lay down next to you, turning off the light.
Sleep took a while to come, and with it images of Donna rejecting you, insulting you for your body, making fun of you. It seemed like you had overcome your problems, but you were very wrong. The encounter with those bullies made you relive your past, made you feel self-conscious again, made you feel even more insecure.
You searched and searched in your mind for a solution, a way to avoid your complexes, a way to stop Donna from despising you for your appearance. You had to do something, or rather, you had to stop doing something.
Yes, yes, the best thing for you, at that moment, was to put your appetite aside, pretend that everything was fine and lock yourself in, exactly like you did a few years ago.
“How are you?” your girlfriend asked the next morning, with everything ready for breakfast. “Are you feeling better?”
“Yes,” you said with a fake smile, leaving the infusion you prepared on the table, ignoring the growl of your stomach. “I'm fine, darling,” you affirmed again, giving the lady in black a soft kiss on the lips.
“You were crying last night,” the brunette whispered, as an informal, discreet comment. “Why didn't you wake me up?”
“Oh, well, I must have had a nightmare,” you said without giving it any importance, blowing the soft steam from your cup. “It's okay, Donna, everything is fine.”
“Mm,” she murmured distrustfully, reaching for a delicious croissant. “Cornetto?”
“No, thanks, I'll just have a tea,” you politely declined.
Donna looked at you confused, but shook her head, devouring the sweet. In other circumstances you would have been amused by the ventriloquist's voracious appetite, one that could even be comical.
But that morning the teasing of your former classmates and the envy you had of the castle maids when you were little made you irrationally angry.
“Hey, stop it,” you snapped unpleasantly, pulling her arm down so she could stop eating. “You've had three, Donna.”
“Cosa? Oh, well, you know I love them,” Donna murmured amused, with her mouth full. “You really don't want one?”
“Ugh,” you sighed, shaking your head and trying to keep your breathing calm. “Can't you stop eating?”
“Mm?” she murmured again, leaving the sweet on the plate and wiping herself with a napkin.
“Your body, look at you,” you said in a disdainful tone, to which the lady responded by blinking and looking at her black dress.
“What's wrong? Have I stained myself?” she asked amused, looking for some leftover croissant.
“How can you eat so much and have that body?” you accused, annoyed, crossing your arms and drinking your bland infusion in one gulp. “Don't you gain weight?”
“Oh, well…” she said, shaking her head. “The truth is that I can't gain or lose weight. My metabolism doesn't change, it must be a Cadou thing,” the lady explained, bringing out the darkest envy that was inside you.
“And that gives you the right to stuff yourself with food in front of me?” you asked in a mocking tone, making her innocent smile disappear from her face. “It's incredible, Donna.”
“Um, but, but…” she stuttered confused again, looking for the cause of your behavior. “What's that about?”
“Not all of us have those privileges, you know?” you exhaled, getting up from the chair. “It seems like you do it on purpose.”
“But what are you talking about? You're acting weird again,” Donna said with a weak voice, getting up from the chair and placing her hands on the table. “(Y/N), tell me what's going on, right now.”
“Donna, you should change the way you cook,” you sighed without thinking, with your mind hurt, not knowing what to do, what to say, how to face your fears without involving the woman of your life. “Pasta, pasta and more pasta… Don't you know how to cook anything else?”
“What?” she asked, frowning, offended. “I thought you liked my food.”
“I like it, but it's unhealthy, don't you see, darling?” you affirmed with a childish tone, leaving the lady even more disoriented.
“The food I prepare is healthy and balanced,” she defended herself with arrogance. “If you have a problem with that, just tell me.”
“Then why I’m that fat?” you asked in the air, pointing at your body.
“Fat? (Y/N), you're making me very nervous, I-I don't know what's going on and...” the lady said, having difficulty pronouncing the words correctly, trembling in terror at your nonsense. “T-The voices...”
“Voices? Oh, great,” you sighed abruptly, raising your hands. “Okay, keep your stupid voices, I don't feel like putting up with you.”
“(Y/N), why are you doing this to me? I didn’t do anything, I didn’t…” Donna said haltingly, sitting up, her breathing becoming increasingly labored. “I can’t…”
You, realizing how unpleasant you had been, how unfair you were to poor Donna, relaxed your expression, putting your hands on her shoulders.
“Shh, darling, calm down… Donna, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, my love,” you repeated over and over again to make her reason before a terrible crisis. “I shouldn't have spoken to you like that, forgive me, honey, please…”
“What did I do wrong?” she asked, without listening to your reassuring words. “Is it because of something I said? I-I don't know what I did wrong…”
“No, no my love, I just… I'm just in a… bad mood, dizzy and… it must, it must be the damn spring and… my love, you're hurting me,” you protested when her hand grabbed yours, too tightly.
“Don't leave me, please, please, I…” the lady said desperately, with a lost expression, out of her mind. “Don't go…”
“I'm not going anywhere, I… It's, it's better that I go down… to… to read,” you sobbed, unable to contain your helplessness. “I just need some time alone, do you understand, my love? Come on, Donna, tell me you understand.”
“Y-Yes,” she said, nodding slowly. “I-I'll give some room.”
“Thank you,” you whispered, kissing her tenderly as she loosened her grip. “It's just a phase, just that. You, you stop worrying... I love you, Donna.”
“Ti amo, (Y/N),” she replied slowly letting you go, watching you walk away again, succumbing to your old loneliness.
Nothing improved after your time alone. In the mirror, you checked to your dismay how all your clothes seemed to be a bit tight on you. It was no use telling yourself that you were exaggerating; all you saw was a chubby girl being harassed by bullies.
You stopped eating, you stopped wanting to taste the delicious dishes of the lady in black, but she, she stopped asking questions. Donna was obviously worried, but your words and requests were much more important than her worries.
You knew she sent Angie to spy on you when you went down to read, when you wanted to be alone. She knew you were crying, that something bad was happening to you, but she didn't say anything.
Until that night.
Your stomach hurt terribly, you had barely eaten a piece of fruit or an infusion. In bed, you tossed and turned trying to eliminate your appetite, but nothing worked, not even the hug, the comfort that Donna discreetly gave you, surrounding you with her arms, with the warmth of her body next to yours under the sheets.
Poor Donna, she didn't know what to do to calm your grief anymore. She was tense, desperate, almost as much as you.
The hunger was too insistent, and the lack of progress in your absurd goal of a perfect body frustrated you. Your mind was screaming at you, urgently demanding food. You were so depressed that you didn't think much of it, carefully getting up and heading to the kitchen.
The delicious cake from days ago was still shiny, calling you like a tempting snake. Your mind said yes, your stomach too, you had no other choice. Slowly you took a piece and little by little, it disappeared into your mouth.
Your useless and unhealthy improvised diet had failed and, as you wiped the chocolate from the corner of your mouth, a new reflection took over you. In a nearby pot, your swollen face shone, reminding you how unattractive you were, how much you had lost, how you had irremediably gone back in time.
“Fuck!” you shouted hitting the counter, letting the tears invade you, the regret for that delicious delicacy take over you.
You sobbed, cursed and cried for several minutes, regretting the day you were born, the day you met Donna, and imagining in your mind, the day she would abandon you.
“(Y/N),” a soft voice said, Donna, who appeared through the door, watching you in silence.
“My goodness… how long have you been there?” you asked as you dried your tears, regaining your composure.
“Long enough,” she said dryly, running to your side, hugging you without making any comment, pressing your head against your shoulder, making lavender invade you, making you want to cry even more.
“Donna,” you sobbed, burying your face in her body. “Donna, Donna…” you repeated clinging to her, letting your pain out.
“Amore mio… I'm here with you,” she whispered, with a calm tone, less impatient than in previous days. “You don't have to cry alone, tesoro…”
“You don't understand, I… I was really hungry and… I ate a piece of cake and…” you explained in the middle of crying, letting her arms, her hands, act as a buffer for your cries.
“Mm, it's normal that you're hungry, you haven't eaten for several days,” Donna said, lovingly stroking your hair.
“I know I'm weak and that I shouldn't but…” you continued sobbing. “Oh, Donna, I'm not okay.”
“I already know that,” she answered, pushing you away to dry your tears with her fingers, without stopping looking at you. “I beg you, (Y/N), tell me what's wrong.”
You moved away, looking at the floor without stopping sobbing, knowing that you couldn't hide much longer. It was the moment of truth.
“The day of our anniversary, when I went to get the cake I…” you began, taking a breath, ready to be honest. “I ran into my old classmates and they… they.”
“What, amore mio? What did they do to you?” the brunette insisted, brushing your hair away from your face, with an understanding voice that she had surely been rehearsing.
“They messed with me, they said I was fat and… then, then I looked myself in a mirror and I realized… that they're right,” you explained, noticing how little by little the pressure in your chest decreased.
“What? That's not…”
“Shut up, okay? You can say whatever you want, Donna, but I have eyes on my face, look at me, I'm a whale…” you interrupted, pointing at yourself.
“No, you're not, you're beautiful, tesoro, stop talking nonsense,” Donna said, nervous, seeing how little by little you lost your calm.
“You say that to make me feel better, but I know it's not true. My body is horrible and you… you're just with me so you're not alone, but you think the same as everyone else, that I'm a whale.”
“Stop talking nonsense, (Y/N),” the lady snapped, in a very serious, severe tone. “Your body is fine, there's nothing wrong with it, you're perfect, gorgeous, (Y/N), the most beautiful girl in the world,” she said with a sincere smile, one you couldn't believe.
“You can't deny what you see, Donna.”
“I don't see anything,” she protested, crossing her arms. “I see a beautiful girl, with a beautiful body and…”
“Stop it! Will you?” you shouted, making the brunette back away, without losing her nerves. “Look, look at me Donna, touch me,” you demanded, bringing her hand to your rounded face, to your wider hips, to your belly. “Are you going to keep denying it?”
“I can't deny something I don't believe, tesoro,” she said, grabbing your wrists to stop you. “Your body is perfect, you're a beautiful and healthy girl, you don't have any problems and... tell me, tell me who it was.” Her tone darkened little by little, a sign that she you to calm down.
“What? No,” you denied, seeing a shadow in her gaze that made you tremble. “No, Donna.”
“Tell me, (Y/N),” she asked you again, to which you shook your head. “They will pay for that.”
“Do you think you can solve everything by killing innocent people?” you protested unhinged, trying to avoid a tragedy.
“And you think the best solution to your problem is to stop eating? Angie, we're leaving!” Donna shouted, going out the door, stopped by a hand on her wrist, one that tried to pull her back.
“No, no, no, no! Donna, don't do anything!” you screamed, making your voice bounce off the walls. “Don’t do anything, honey, please, just… just hold me,” you sobbed, throwing yourself into her arms. “Hold me, Donna, please.”
She snorted, but finally fulfilled your wish, holding you tightly against her, silently, caressing your head, kissing you softly, doing everything that her erratic words couldn't do.
“I don't care about your body, (Y/N),” she whispered softly, still caressing you. “I will always love you, just the way you are. You are already perfect like this, amore mio, don't believe the words of fools. Don't you think that I don't care about my appearance?”
“It's not the same, Donna,” you whispered, miraculously calmer. “You are perfect.”
“Grazie, (Y/N), but you are very wrong,” she said amused, kissing your hair. “Neither I nor you are perfect, but we are together and perfection changes its meaning when I look at your face, when I delight in your beauty.”
“Sometimes you are too tender,” you laughed, pressing yourself against her chest. “B-But it's true that I'm getting fat. I-I don't look attractive.”
“Well, you're blind,” Donna joked, lifting your chin to slowly capture your lips in a wet, salty kiss.
“No, you're blind,” you whispered, rubbing your nose with hers, finally understanding that everything was fine, that the past tormented you, but you had to learn to ignore it. “Look at my face. Don't you think it's fatter?”
“Um, no,” she said, playing with your hands and looking at your features.
“Come on, all the dresses are too tight on me and… look, look at this, my breasts have grown,” you exhaled pointing at your body, making her mischievous eye rest on the indicated spot and move it away immediately.
“It must be your imagination,” the lady hesitated, shaking her head and fixing your hair. “You are just as beautiful as ever and your… your breasts too.”
“I was expecting that answer,” you joked, letting yourself fall back into her arms and immediately pulling away. “But I still feel… ah!” you protested when you touched your own chest, feeling a strange pain.
“What's wrong?” she asked, worried.
“Nothing, it's just that… they hurt a little,” you said frowning, running your hand over your breasts.
Donna pulled away with a strange look and looked you over meticulously from top to bottom, lifting your nightgown.
“Do they hurt?” she asked without looking at you, observing your slightly swollen belly, with a completely disoriented face.
“Yes, I don't know, it must be because I've gained weight and… Donna!” you screamed when a cold hand rested on your skin. “What are you doing?”
“Now that you mention it… you do look a little different,” the ventriloquist murmured, focusing on her exploratory caresses.
“I'm fat, aren't I?” you sighed, your smile fading at that sincerity on her lips. “I knew it, I knew that…”
“Taci,” Donna silenced you, shaking her head and looking at you with a frown. “(Y/N), tell me, when was the last time you bled?”
“What? Well… I don't know,” you said confused, surprised by her sudden nervousness. “A couple… a couple of months ago, I think, I've always been very irregular and…” As you spoke something came to your mind, a possibility you hadn't considered. “Gods, Donna, do you think that…?”
“Is it possible?” she asked quickly, grabbing one of your hands with hers, with a gleam in her eyes that led to a wide smile on your lips. “(Y/N), you're not getting fat... I think, I think you are...”
“Oh, Gods... is it true? Are we going to...?” you asked, with a different euphoria, completely forgetting about the hurtful words of those bullies, finding a wonderful meaning to those distorted reflections, to that non-existent complex that was becoming more and more evident in your body.
“Questo è il giorno più bello de la mia vitta!” the brunette shrieked, picking you up in her arms and spinning you in the air while the two of you cried with emotion. “(Y/N)!”
“Ugh, honey, put me down,” you said amused, protesting with little blows to her shoulder. “It's the happiest of mine too,” you whispered, panting from the weakness of your body. “But be careful, darling, I'm very weak.”
“Certo, you… sit down and… I'll prepare something delicious for you to eat and… please, stop getting lost in your past, okay? Now the present is the most important thing, and the future.”
“Yes, I… I've been stupid,” you said, fighting against the effusive kisses of your lover, slow, suggestive and nervous kisses. “Donna…”
“I'm sorry, it's just that I…” she said, repentant for her enthusiasm, giving you one last kiss and looking at you slowly, intensely. “You are my beautiful girl, the most beautiful in the world and… Gods… (Y/N), I don't want to hear you say nonsense one more time, okay?”
“Okay,” you nodded, making a funny gesture. “You're right, Donna, I don't care what those assholes say. I'm not perfect, but I think I could be am when I'm by your side,” you whispered into her lips, capturing them with emotion, bathing them in tears, this time, of joy.
“I'm coming, Donna, I'm coming!” a squeaky voice interrupted the moment.
The Angie doll appeared in the kitchen, quickly climbing the counter and gripping a large knife in a comical way.
“Well, who needs to be taught a lesson?” she asked in a threatening, amused tone.
“Angie,” Donna sighed, approaching the doll and taking the knife away. “Angie, we have some news to give you, (Y/N) and I are going to…”
“Oh, no, no, no, no, no…” the puppet sighed. “I'll just say one thing… I don't change diapers!”
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Caught in Lingerie!!! P2
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I stood in front of the mirror and adjusted my maids uniform. It had been two weeks now since my gf (Amber) had caught me. The only time I wear anything masculine is when I go to work or the two of us meet up with friends. Whenever I’m home I can only wear what she tells me to. Sometimes it’s lingerie, other times it’s a cute to and jeans. If I am cleaning or cooking, then it’s this maids uniform. But regardless of what I’m wearing, the chastity cage is ALWAYS locking my cock away. I haven’t used it since she caught me watching porn in lingerie, makeup, and a wig. I reach up and run my fingers over the collar that is now part of my daily requirement whenever I’m home. She tells me that this, like the chastity cage, is to remind me of my place and of her ownership. The thought fills me with both excitement and dread, my biggest fantasy is playing out and while a part of me wants to resist, a larger part can’t help but revel in it. I bend down to pick up some of her clothing and feel the anal plug she makes me use. A moan escapes my lips as my caged cock twitches. The feeling of the plug shifting with every move I make is intoxicating. I suddenly feel Ambers hands on my hips and she pulls me closer. She leans over me and I feel her hot breath on my ear as she whispers.
Amber: Is sissy enjoying being plugged? The sounds you make are so cute.
I blush and squirm as my caged cock starts to strain against its confines. I feel her hand snake its way down to it as she begins to caress my caged cock, making me tremble.
Amber:oh my…. Your leaking. Making such a delicious mess of your panties. Such a naughty little sissy.
I moan involuntarily as she teases me.
Me: Babe, please…… I need
Amber: Oh I know what you need. But I don’t think you’ve earned it yet sissy. So no….. you’re not getting unlocked. Now follow me.
I follow her as she leads me to our bedroom.
Amber:Lay down sissy.
I wordlessly obey, laying on my back with my head resting in the pillow. She smiles and gets on the bed beside me, smiling down at me as I look back at her pleadingly. She starts to caress my inner thighs and caged cock.
Amber: I know you need release babe, I really do. But I’m still hurt that you hid this side of yourself from me. So until I decide that you’ve made it up to me, you’re locked in this cage. Though it’s a really cute look, don’t you think? Your sissy clit locked away for me. It really turns me on.
She leans down and nips my earlobe then kisses my neck while she continues teasing me. I moan as her touches send shivers through me and my cock strains painfully against its cage.
Amber: You’re being such a good sissy for me baby. Seeing you like this is such a turn on. When I first found out about your porn habits I was angry. Angry that you hid it from me, scared that you might not be attracted to me. But the more I looked, the more turned on I became. I knew that if you were home alone for enough time, that you would dress up and have some fun.
She straddles my face as she talks, still caressing my thighs and teasing my caged cock.
Amber: You might not be able to use your sissy clit to get me off, but you tongue is still free. Use it sissy, get your Mistress off.
I do as I’m told, desperate to please her enough that she will release my sissy clit from its cage.
#feminization kink#feminization captions#feminization school#feminized sissy#sissi bimbo#sissy caged#submisive sissy#sissi slave#sissy domination#humiliated sissy#humiliation sissy#feminine sissy#sissi femboi#sissy crossdresser#panty sissy#slvt training#permanent feminization#forced feminized#feminizationtraining#femin
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tadashi so has the body pillow of himself.
#j’s guchiry posting again#“Whats cooking good looking?” *looking into a mirror*#It just feels right.
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kill me
(*wobbly tearstained voice* this is father & son richard plantagenet in henry vi part 3 1983 dir jane howell btw. which is. extremely good)
#HIM. DAD!!!?!?! YOU SEE#I thought the ian holm (1965) version of richard and york's relationship was devastating. I had no idea what was coming for me#henry vi part 3#shakespeare#richard iii#he just folds into the hug so completely and without trepidation even when he thinks he's being reprimanded. is the thing#'love forswore me in my mother's womb'#WHAT WAS YOUR DAD THEN RICHARD??? CHOPPED LIVER???????#*on my knees on the bare earth rending my garments and clawing at my bloodied face*#your brothers kind of suck I will grant you but they frankly seem to love you just as much or more than they love each other lol#I'm fine. the self-fulfilling prophecy and utter desolate isolation of abject self-loathing just got in my eyes again#I suppose a lifetime of your mum going 'shame of my womb' would do that to a motherfucker but STILL#honestly nothing beats moving through henry vi parts 2 and 3 before hitting richard iii. especially in this version#when you see the desperation verging on mania of york deciding to claim the throne reflected in his son later and it's like. ah. oh.#'not like the dam or the sire' are u sure about that margaret lmao#even the way richard will eventually do his asides are direct mirrors to how his father does it in this version#the matching limp after york gets wounded by clifford. the way they clearly share a sense of humour. *sounds of agony*#never have I witnessed a york I actually rooted for so deeply as bernard hill's even WITH that worrying intensity tho#among other high points of this version: a neverending cavalcade of some of the best noses you'll ever see in your life#also an unusual but SO fucking good take on richard. laurence olivier's version is certifiably Iconic of course (for better or worse)#but he is also like. transparently a disney villain haha I believe I coined the term 'murderscamp' to describe him#lots of fun to watch but it makes everyone else look like such absolute dumbasses for not seeing him for what he is#and lots of performances to my mind go way too far into the creep factor way too quickly#with ron cook's softspoken more believeably vulnerable richard from the outset it's easier to see how he flies under the radar#he's short and slight his voice doesn't rise that much even when he's in a rage and he's the softest with their father#you see how edward and george could still categorize him as their baby brother and not take him seriously -- not realize that some things#have uh. Shifted!! under the surface! over the years! in ways they probably should have been paying attention to!#to them he's still the kid warwick carried off stage on his shoulders.#frighteningly capable in battle but still more to be protected than protected from. until... god. augh. ow.
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No one is responsible for this election besides white people and implying otherwise is reductive, racist and frankly going to do nothing except for weaken community and coalition building we have desperately needed for decades if not centuries. Cause the reality is white supremacy created Trump. White people voted en masse for him. It wasn't latines, or Black men, or Arabs, or the Free Palestine movement. It will always rest squarely on the shoulders of whiteness as a individual identity and as a superstructure.
Stop fighting each other. Start fighting FOR each other. It will never ever be the fault of racialized people and anti-racists. Ever.
#donald trump#election 2024#I'm not doing great in my personal life rn but i just absolutely needed to get this off my chest#ik some of y'all're blaming arab folk and their allies for this are fucking white whos mommas and poppas probably voted for Trump and y'all#keep your mouths shut at that Thanksgiving dinner table. i know it.#get your shit together. idgaf if you feel white guilt idgaf what excuse you can think of#to make this not the sole fault of whiteness#you are not cooking. you are not smart. you are pushing people away who need you and whos communities will NEVER. be responsible for this.#and i for one won't be spending time searching for what type of marginalized communities i can blame for this#look in the mirror. then go out and build safety with Black & Brown folk. with the queer community and not just the white ones. with arabs#& latines and men and women and everyone else you can. protect and organize. plan carefully. stay safe and don't leave the sides of the folk#who need you most right now#because you feel you've cracked the code on what non white person is responsible for the actions of white people.#thats all i gotta say on the matter good night
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let’s talk virgin!geto who might be inexperienced but knows what he wants.
you both have been dating for a good few months, early years of college and can’t get your hands off each other. he’s the sweetest boyfriend you could ask for, possessive sure but he always treats you right. it’s one of his first serious relationships while you had dated around before, plenty of experience up your sleeve. he makes sure to kiss your forehead, carry an extra jacket because he knows you will get cold and drives you around the city on his bike.
geto who’s ears are completely red when you spend the night with him for the first time ever. he made sure to kick his roommate out so he could have his complete attention on you. he cooks you your favourite meal and has your favourite rom com waiting to play on the television but deep down inside he’s busy thinking about how you look underneath all your clothes.
it’s not like you haven’t touched each other before. you find yourself often pushed against the library wall with geto’s pierced tongue in your mouth, his tattooed hand travelling under your top to play with your breasts. more than once you’ve been caught by a fellow student who had the misfortune of witnessing your very public display of affection instead of a physics textbook.
so when you are in his flat, hips straddling his thighs on his old couch, geto almost moans out loud. he watches you as you grind your ass against his clothed cock, not innocent on his side when he intentionally wore grey sweats. “slow do— fuck! slower! baby” he groans as your gyrating hips make him leak through, the friction between your shorts and his sweats enough to make his eyes roll back.
when he carries you to his bed and lies you flat, it’s like a dream come true. you pull down your shorts and stop, inviting him to do the rest. geto does not need anything more to use his pearly white teeth to drag your pretty black panties leaving it to hang around your ankle. he can’t afford to wait when all he has ever dreamed off is spread open waiting for him.
you look up to him with glossy eyes and your lip tucked under your teeth when you hear him say the words — “i have never done this before.”
confused you get up, supporting your body on your elbows. he looks away turning red at his own brazen admission, and only looks at you when you pull down his sweats to help release his girthy cock, precum beading at the tip. he groans when your much smaller hands begin to jerk him off, cooing about how good he is being for you. there’s a teasing tilt to your tone because it’s not everyday you learn your hot boyfriend is a secret virgin! you continue to jerk him off and tease him for acting tough when he decides can’t take it anymore, the way you talk to him like he’s too innocent to touch you back.
geto shows you that despite being your good boy, he can make you eat your shit eating grin when he pins your thighs down. his mouth is on your dripping cunt, tongue licking your clit in slow circles. he does not stop when you cum on his face, he does not stop to take a break when his ringed fingers enter your wet entrance, squishing and squelching echoing throughout. he does not stop until there’s a ring of your cream that parallels the silver rings he wears and the lower half of his face painted with your slick juices.
you don’t start worrying until he picks you up and holds your legs open in front of his full length mirror so he can slip his heavy cock past your spread folds and just to say, “fuck baby, wanted my first time to be in missionary looking at your pretty face but i think full nelson might be better for your bratty pussy.”
#trvthservm#geto smut#geto x reader#geto x you#geto suguru smut#geto suguru x reader#jujutsu kaisen smut#jjk x reader#jjk smut#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen x you#jjk x you#female reader#geto suguru#geto#jujustsu kaisen x reader#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#jjk x reader smut#jujutsu geto#jjk geto#getou suguru x reader#geto x y/n
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things they do that make your heart skip a beat
♱ bakugou, kirishima, midoriya, todoroki, kaminari, shinsou
fluffy and suggestive 😔
disclaimer this could all js be niche stuff i find attractive…
bakugou
♱ wears black compression shirts and tank tops that cling to his biceps, shows uncharacteristic patience helping you with schoolwork, blushes when he catches you looking at him, grabs your hips when he walks past you, cooks shirtless with a ‘kiss the cook’ apron on, chronic manspreader, reverses the car with his hand on your seat and looking over his shoulder yk exactly what im talking about
kirishima
♱ makes you sit on his back when he does press ups - will then proceed to do one handed press ups while grinning at you in the gym mirror, poses after a work out for you, wipes stuff off your face and (if edible duh) licks it off his thumb, has the worlds deepest morning voice, hugs you from behind CONSTANTLY - if he could glue himself to your backside you better believe he would
midoriya
♱ IS RESPECTFUL TO HIS MOTHER 😫😫, will hurl himself out the car to come open your door for you, gives you the most insightful opinions of clothes, makeup, whatever, rubs his thumb over your hand when he holds your hand, holds the door open for you without a second thought, the sidewalk rule <3, saves every. single. photo. you send him
todoroki
♱ pays for everything before you can protest, sends you flowers with little notes attached randomly, brushes/styles your hair for you, will sit for hours in changing rooms w you and make you do 360s for every outfit, takes candids of you and refuses to delete any of them, constantly leans down so you can speak in his ear and you get a big whiff of his fancy cologne, speaks diff languages 🥹
kaminari
♱ leans his hands on the tops of doorways when he’s talking to you, pulls you in by your belt loops to talk to you, leans over in the middle of serious conversations to whisper a stupid joke in your ear that you have to struggle not to cackle at, wears rings and lets you play with them, calls you “m’lady” and “ma’am” when you’re annoyed at him, whenever he zips you up in a dress or buttons you up he’ll kiss the back of your neck and your shoulders, is really good with his little baby and toddler cousins 🩷🩷🩷
shinsou
♱ “yeah?” “mhmm?” WHEEWWW SIR, plays guitar for you and sends u vids of him playing songs u request, stretches and his shirts always lift up to show off his happy trail 🙂↕️, drags you down to sit in his lap for EVERY activity he does - paperwork, video games, whatever, has constant bedroom eyes???, tugs on your hair to get your attention, had to lean back and adjust himself everytime he sits down bc he wears the baggiest pants in existence
do i need to start a taglist?
#bnha#bnha x reader#mha#mha x reader#bakugou#bakugou x reader#bakugou katsuki#bakugou katsuki x reader#kirishima#kirishima x reader#eijiro kirishima#eijiro kirishima x reader#todoroki#todoroki x reader#shoto todoroki#shoto todoroki x reader#midoriya#midoriya x reader#izuku midoriya#izuku midoriya x reader#kaminari#kaminari x reader#denki kaminari x reader#denki kaminari#shinsou#shinsou hitoshi#shinsou x reader#shinsou hitoshi x reader
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being roomies with a guy wasn’t what you had in mind, but what could you do when he was the only one offering the deal you wanted?
a bright smile on his face as he folds his arms over his chest, leaning against the marble counter, his eyes trailing your body.
“of course i can do that for you; don’t worry about paying a deposit; i got you.”
and with that, you were eight months deep into rooming with suguru, only catching each other for a couple of minutes every other day.
“what’s up? you hungry?” his hair tied in a messy bun with his shirt off and his pajama pants hanging low.
ugh… put some clothes on.
offering you dinner every time you came into the kitchen, his eyes dropping to your ass when you passed through to get to the pantry.
he didn’t know why, but he just couldn’t stop looking at you every time he got the chance; you were his type to a T.
suguru thought that was all it was ever going to be, just looking at you and exchanging a few words before you left the apartment or went into your room.
until he heard something, something he was never meant to hear.
when you did your “activities,” you made sure to be respectful; sometimes it even felt weird to do it when someone else was in the house, but you had needs. keeping it quiet, not risking a peep slipping through.
this time you got a little bit too carried away, but you just couldn’t stop. one hand working in between your thighs, your fingers pumping in and out of you at a good steady rhythm, while the other rubbed over your body, and suguru was there to hear it all.
suguru slowly walked to your bedroom door, leaning against the wall by it with his arms folded, red smeared all over his face as his heart raced, the sound pounding in his ears.
the walls were thin, the only downside of this place, but suguru found himself smiling at the fact he could hear you.
trying to imagine what position you were in, if you were using your fingers or a toy, the lewd faces you were doing, if you were building a sweat at this point, questions flying through his head.
he felt like a creep listening in just a few feet away, which he totally was, but your voice was keeping him there.
suguru loves your voice; it sent tingles down his spine every time you would speak, even if it was just a single "no, thank you." when asking you if you wanted dinner.
it was so soothing, so soothing, in fact, that he would purposely prolong the small talk just to hear your voice bounce off the walls of the apartment, his mouth salivating while he listened to you.
keep going, please.
your moans weren’t loud, but they could be heard; they were very distinct, but he could still make out your sweet voice, and that turned him on more than it should have.
unfolding his arms and grabbing for your door handle, if he had to listen to your moans for another minute, he was going to combust; he was going to go fucking insane.
sliding his hand off the handle and putting a knuckle to the door, calling your name as he knocked lightly, loud enough for you to hear.
“… i cooked; did you want anything?”
his eyes slowly looking over to the kitchen that was lightly lit, closing his eyes trying to come up with another excuse, while you quickly scattered, licking your fingers and throwing on the shorts beside your bed.
fast walking to your door and opening it, a bright smile on your face, trying to act normal.
"im fine, suguru; i already ate." your eyes sliding from his beautiful face to his body, once again shirtless with pajama pants hanging low, showing his v-line, but something else caught your eye.
suguru mirrored you, sliding his eyes over your figure and your disheveled look, feeling his dick growing more, his cheeks flushing as he slowly puts his hand over his bulge, making eye contact with you.
a lump was caught in his throat, his chest rising and falling so fast like he just came back from a run.
he needed you, or he was going to go fucking insane.
"do you want to fuck?"
#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk x reader#jjk x you#jujustsu kaisen x reader#x reader#part 1#jjk suguru#geto suguru#getou suguru x reader#jujutsu kaisen suguru#suguru geto smut#geto#suguru geto#jujutsu geto#jjk geto#geto x reader#geto smut#geto x you#geto x y/n#suguru smut#suguru x reader#suguru x you#suguru geto x reader#geto suguru x you#suguru x y/n#getou suguru#jujutsu kaisen geto#suguru geto x you#suguru geto x y/n
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ending my bender now that i’m getting up at 3pm on a tuesday when i told myself i was getting up at 9 at the Latest to do smthg for my professor i was supposed to give her yesterday -_-
#diary#my body said: we’re crashing ! but also i DID cook LAST NIGHT ACTUALLY#honestly ? i think she knows …#like … implicitly …#but did i also literally have to shit ? yes & did i HOLD IT IN until i could get HIGH FIRST#also yes#messy …#‘i don’t have a drug problem’ 🙄 girl …#but also ok i’m going to go weigh myself today bc i literally#haven’t been weighed since like september & the drs don’t weigh u here they just ask & it annoys me like can i at least have a record ? 😭😭😭#i love free data#BUT ALSO DATA THAT IVE PAYED FOR#this isn’t even like ED ‘i want to weigh myself’ this is literally a ‘i don’t know what i am & my lifestyle has significantly changed in the#past 9 months & id like to see if im where im at normally or like if ive just been eatin good re: alcohol bc literally ALSKALSKLAKSLAKSLAKSL#WHEN WE WERE DRINKING WE WERENT EATING ANYWAY LIKE 😭😭😭 that WAS the calories#anyway but still like i did pretty much stop exercising entirely & also it’s been like 9 fucking months like BRO WHAT#i’m used to goin to the gp or a dr every few months & just getting the weight & it going on my record like i Know what my Typical Weight is#like what AM I 😭😭😭😭#honestly my worry truly is that it was like when i had syphilis (i.e. ‘very unwell’) & i was looking in the mirror going ‘skinnyyyy 😍😍😍’ &#my mother said ‘u look like a corpse’ ALSKALSKALSKALKSALKSLAKSL so am i SKINNYYYY 😍😍😍 or do i look like a corpse
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"Itadori-kun. Good. You're on time."
Kento checked his watch, clearly distracted, as Yuuji approached with pocketed hands. The shopping centre was bustling, a hive of activity around them. Yuuji ruffled his own hair, unsure.
"Yeah, I just...wasn't sure why we're meeting here, is all."
Still distracted, Kento tapped off a message, before slipping his phone back into his inner pocket. He rarely offered smiles when there was business yet to be done, and today was no different.
"I was hoping for your assistance with a few errands before your school term ends. I'm sure you'll be busy with your friends after then, and I shouldn't like to take your vacation time. I'm sure you're looking forward to the break."
In truth, Yuuji deflated just at the thought of it; though he was an orphan amongst orphans, he didn't favour empty time in the way he used to, with memory and the devil as his constant companions. Still he smiled.
"Yeah! Can't wait. Got...got loads planned."
Kento read Yuuji, shrewd for a moment, before hyper-focusing on the task at hand.
"Quite. Come along, Yuuji."
Yuuji grew more and more flummoxed as Kento's list of errands tickered out before them. Too polite to question why, and with absolute faith that Kento had good reason to drag him along for the ride, Yuuji stomached it all with confused good grace.
Yuuji blinked, momentarily blinded by the flash of light in the photo booth. He grinned for the next photo, and Kento's cool deep voice rumbled past the curtain.
"No smiling, Yuuji."
"H-huh? How did you know?"
"Was I wrong?"
"Uh...sorry, Nanamin."
As a strip of tiny poe-faced photos clicked into the dispenser, Yuuji couldn't understand why Nanamin was so satisfied by such bland pictures. Yuuji was, however, touched; clearly Nanamin liked wallet photos as he liked his suits-- beige. Kento clipped across Yuuji's thoughts.
"Do you like the beach, Yuuji?"
Yuuji blinked. "The beach...?"
"Yes. The beach. Do you like it?"
"Uh...I guess. Why?"
Kento hummed, satisfied, not answering Yuuji's question. Instead, as he passed Yuuji his coffee, he stood and leaned around Yuuji, gently pulling at the back of Yuuji's collar. Yuuji twisted to look, baffled now, and Kento released him, sitting with another satisfied hum. He tapped on his phone again.
"Your identification documents are in your room at Jujutsu High?"
"Nanamin...what's this about?"
"It's important to take care of your documents, Yuuji."
"...so you're just...checking up on me?"
Kento smiled, polite. "Of course." A pause. "I assume you'd like to come back to ours for dinner?"
Yuuji brimmed with unasked questions. "I don't need to-- I'm not really that hungry-- honestly a coffee is great--"
"Mrs.Nanami has cooked extra."
"God, yes, please, I'm starving."
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The summer vacation approached Yuuji like a black cloud. He could not bring himself to be excited for enforced inactivity; his casual offers to assist staff on missions fell on deaf ears. Gojo laughed Yuuji off with a clap on the shoulder. Yuuji smiled away the gentle rejection; he did not have the stomach to beg to work.
Instead, Yuuji stewed, leaning on his rainy windowsill until cicada buzz replaced the pitter-patter of water on earth. Late July arrived, unwelcome, and Yuuji steeped in a pit of dread.
At 2am, on the first day of summer vacation, Yuuji's phone rang. Bleary-eyed, and flat, he looked away from his computer screen and lowered his headset. He looked at his screen with a lurching gut; he answered the phone.
"Nanamin?"
A voice, rusty with sleeplessness. "Ah, Yuuji. I apologise for waking you at this hour. I need help with a mission. Are you available?"
Yuuji perked up immediately, tail wagging. "Y-yeah! Yeah, totally! I can be ready...er...in ten? Yeah?"
Kento's voice smiled. "Good. I'll pick you up."
Yuuji danced from his desk chair, shaking off his joggers and wriggling into his uniform with a grin, ruffling his hair before the mirror. In barely two minutes, he was ready, a spring in his step as he headed to wait outside. He felt so light, so relieved, and he grabbed his keys, opening his door to--
"Oh, shi--...Nanamin?"
Kento stood at the door, comfortable in loose clothes, and...sandals? It was an odd contrast to the backdrop of night, and Kento's usual attire. Kento smiled again, polite.
"Yes. Are you ready?"
"Y-yeah, I'm...how did you get here so fast?"
"The roads are quiet at this time of night, Yuuji."
A pause. "...Nanamin."
"Yuuji."
"Are you fucking with me?"
"Language."
When Yuuji opened his mouth to argue back, his jaw dropped, as you bustled up the corridor behind Kento with a sleepy grin on your face. You slapped Kento's elbow, shooting him a chastising look.
"Morning, Yuuji! Excited?" You pressed a kiss to his cheek, whirling past to invade his bedroom. Yuuji was speechless, horribly confused.
Kento checked his watch as you bustled around. Tapped his foot as you bustled around. Tutted, and leaned pointedly round the corner to stare at you as you bustled around.
"Darling, we're going to be la--"
"--don't give me attitude, Kento, we are about 6 hours early, and you know it--"
"--it pays off to check-in ahead of schedule--"
"--hush. I'll have words with you later."
Kento bristled, pugnacious. You walked out of Yuuji's room with his rucksack in hand. You pinched his chin, gesturing him along with your hand.
"Come on, Yuuji. Before Mr.Organised has conniptions."
Yuuji felt himself swept along by Kento, who still scoffed, mulish. The night air smelled sweet, and Yuuji found himself gently bodied into the back seat of Kento's car.
"--Nanamin-- I don't understand--"
You shot Kento a pointed look from the passenger seat. At first frowning, then with dawning realisation, you scolded Kento in disbelief.
"...you haven't told him."
Kento almost smirked as he rolled the car away over gravel. "I don't know what you mean."
You looked from Kento, to Yuuji, and back again. You reached slowly into Kento's bag, rummaging. Yuuji felt a glossy little book pressed into his hands.
"...a...passport?"
"...Kento didn't tell you."
Never one for expecting a gift, Yuuji couldn't see one when placed before his eyes. "Tell me what? Nanamin?"
Kento chuckled to himself, his eyes glimmering at Yuuji in the rearview mirror.
"Our flight is at 10:30, Yuuji."
Yuuji peered into the seat beside him; a new suitcase, neatly labelled with a luggage tag in his name. He yanked it to the seat beside him, unzipping it, and finding it full of new swimsuits, t-shirts, shorts, sandals, everything he could possibly need. He opened the glossy new passport in his hands, and hiccupped, his breath catching in his chest.
Yuuji rammed into realisation with prickling eyes, and a quiet sniffle, his eyes hidden in the dark. His reply was thick, stilted.
"Our flight...to where?"
"Malaysia. Now give me back that passport. You'll only lose it."
#papamin au#Papamin by Haitch#Papamin by pseudowho#nanami my love#pseudowho#jjk#kento nanami#nanami kento#jjk nanami#kento nanami x reader#kento nanami x you#nanami fluff#jujutsu kaisen nanami#jujutsu nanami#kento nanami x y/n#nanami kento fluff#nanami kento x reader#nanami kento x you#nanami x reader#nanami x y/n#nanami x you#nanami fanart#jjk kento#yuji itadori#jjk itadori#jujutsu itadori#yuji#yuuji itadori#sukuna#itadori yuuji
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Kicks the door open I have come! to request a Self-aware AU with the Twst bois. When they and the Darling/MC/Player/S/O switch bodies. However, the Darling isn't inside the game. So it's like the Darling waking up in the boys' bodies inside the game, and the boys waking up in the Darling's body in the real world. Thankyou very much 🙏👍🫂✨
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.。*♡ a/n: self-aware au, my beloved. It was so fun to write this and I wrote a lot too 🥺💓. It took me a while to finish, so I hope you like it, darling!
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Azul could always feel your presence through the puppet you control. He felt calm when you looked at him. He felt delighted at every laugh you laughed, and he wanted nothing more than to be beside you. The real you. He wished really hard for it to be possible someday, not knowing that this was exactly what was going to happen. Although his request was successful, there was just one error in the equation: he was in your body, your holy, beautiful body. Which means... You were in his horrible body.
While others would feel happy (and he really is happy to an extent), Azul feels a sense of trepidation knowing that you were awaking in his body and there was no way for him to check on you. Or could he? He tried calling his own phone but it wasn't possible. Resigned, he then took to explore your room and home and if you have any roommates / lived with your parents, Azul would try get along with them and collect information on you. While this isn't the ideal, Azul still has to think ten times ahead so when he take you to Twisted Wonderland (not a matter of if but more of when), he could make you sign a deal.
By the way, he definitely try to unlock your phone. And since he is in your body, Azul may try to unlock your phone with your fingerprint or your face if your phone has that function. If he is successful Azul will read your messages as if it were a magazine, he would see what type of songs you listen and videos you like to watch, what's in your history. Basically he is your fbi agent seeing everything on your phone, there's not a thing he'll not see. Good luck for you, reader. That's why I always I always delete my history lol.
Meanwhile you. You wake up on Azul Ashengrotto's body, the octavinelle dorm leader. Geez, are you dreaming? But everything is so real and feels so real. Jade and Floyd seems so real. And their voices, mocking and teasing, almost condescending as you tried your best to act like Azul. They seemed to know that something was wrong but neither choose to ask, brushing off as you being busy with a new scam plan. You were overjoyed but also anxious, without knowing what to do. Could you even return to your body at all? Only time will tell.
⠀⠀
Jade always knew that something was strange with this world, it was almost too... Surreal? He can't quite put into words the things he feel but everything was so much clearer whenever he could feel your presence when he was studying or riding his broom. He could feel your presence when he was cooking, when he was talking about this terrariums, when he was beating people who broke their part of the deal. You seemed to favor him, to love him. He could feel your affection seeping through your cellphone. And he wished to see you, to know you as intimately as you knew him.
And that wish became real. One day he woke up in a different bedroom, in a different body, then, while he is a little surprised, Jade just brush this off as something you did. Perhaps you wanted to show him your world? You wanted to show him your life? Or were you trying to show him something else? Either way, Jade is having the time of his life in your body. Though, as if he was mesmerized by it, he caught himself looking himself at the mirror to see your face staring right back at him. He looks like an excited kid making silly faces in front of the mirror. Honestly he is so unserious. Making faces and silly dances, and laughing because of it.
⠀
Floyd is instantly thrilled, if somewhat bewildered. At first, he messes around with everything he can find, marveling at your surroundings and taking a deep dive into your belongings — he finds it all so fascinating. He’s absolutely entertained by exploring your room, your things, and all the little details that give him insight into your life. But once the novelty wears off, his mischievous nature kicks in. He wants to know everything about you — what you like, your habits, your friends — and he’s not afraid to dig deep. Floyd starts exploring your social media, searching for anything that brings him closer to you and your world. If he finds anyone he thinks might be close to you, he’s ready to make them uncomfortable with cryptic messages or odd behavior, wanting to make it clear that no one knows you better than him.
Meanwhile, you, trapped in Floyd’s body, have to navigate his spontaneous, unpredictable moods and intense physicality — whether in class, on the basketball court, or during his shenanigans. He's having the time of his life while you are fighting for yours, even more when Azul send you to squeeze some people. Like??? How are you supposed to do this????
⠀
Silver always dreamt of you. He knew you, the feeling of your love and affection, the tone of your voice, even if when he woke up he forget everything. A blurry line separating you two. For a while, he thought that you were some higher being that he created on his mind, a simple part of his imagination. That is until this magicless student come around and your presence was all over them, controlling them, talking through them. He wanted to get closer, he wished he could talk to you, to bask on your presence. But he couldn't. He couldn't break his code. Not yet.
But when he slept that night something was different. He couldn't jump into another dream, his voice was different, his height was different, then when he inched closer to the mirror, he saw. A different face. And he knew instantly that it was your face. It was a very beautiful face, exactly how he had imagined. Though it was not what he wanted. He wanted to talk to you, to tell what he felt whenever your gaze was upon him. He didn't want to be you. Or for you to be him.
⠀
Riddle wakes up in your body, feeling completely disoriented and frustrated with the lack of control he has over the new, unfamiliar world around him. But soon, the shock turns into curiosity and then into obsession as he realizes he now has full access to everything about you, your routines, belongings, even your weaknesses, and insecurities.
Riddle’s meticulous nature drives him to organize your life, make everything as “perfect” as he can, so when you’re back, it’ll be clear that he knows what’s best for you. He spends hours exploring your things, setting up strict plans, and making lists, even going so far as to cut out people he feels are a bad influence. All of this, in his mind, is for your “own good.”
In Twisted Wonderland, you’re now bound to the rules of Heartslabyul, balancing Riddle’s strict schedule, navigating his many routines, and dealing with his high standards as you struggle to maintain his reputation without causing a commotion.
⠀
Jamil is quick to adjust, immediately masking his initial confusion in favor of stealthily gathering information about your world. He keeps a low profile, but behind that calm facade, he’s strategically piecing together every part of your life, figuring out who’s important to you and how he can stay in your life even if he returns to his world. Jamil moves through your world with subtlety, observing your friends and family with a quiet intensity, noting who to trust — and who to remove from your life. He’s ready to make subtle changes to your social circle or behavior, aligning your life with what he thinks is “best.”
Meanwhile, back in Twisted Wonderland, you’re handling Jamil’s carefully hidden responsibilities, feeling the pressure of his dual life between serving Kalim and managing his own ambitions, all while trying not to slip up and reveal your true identity. It's difficult.
⠀
Kalim wakes up in your body with sheer joy and fascination, his excitement overriding any initial confusion. He’s absolutely delighted to be in your world, taking in every little detail with childlike wonder. Kalim sees this as an opportunity to become even closer to you, and he goes about learning everything there is to know about your life, friends, and family, brimming with excitement to be part of it all. He’s incredibly affectionate with anyone he meets, happy to share his thoughts, and may unintentionally end up sharing details about “you” that leave people puzzled. He can’t resist splurging a bit on your behalf, thinking he’s treating you.
As for you, adapting to Kalim’s responsibilities in Twisted Wonderland is overwhelming, as you’re thrown into his high-energy life and surrounded by his devoted friends and followers. His cheerful, social world is a whirlwind of activity and expectation, especially with Jamil by your side, assessing every move you make with a scrutinizing eye.
⠀
When Ruggie wakes up in your body, he’s initially thrown off but quickly realizes the opportunity in front of him. Instead of panicking, he takes a strategic approach, savoring every moment as he explores your life and digs into your personal world. His tendencies kick in subtly but intensely; he’s not one for grand, showy gestures, but every action is deliberate, aimed at securing his presence in your life as deeply as possible, as he changes your wallpaper for fanart of him and enters the game to level up all his cards for you.
He begins by poking through your belongings, finding small things that give him insight into your personality, routines, and friends. Ruggie is careful to go unnoticed, learning as much as he can about your relationships and keeping mental notes about anyone he thinks poses a “threat” to his place in your life. He’s not above making subtle changes, distancing you from people he dislikes and reshaping your social circle to align with his preferences, but he does so with skillful subtlety — most people won’t even realize he’s manipulating things from behind the scenes.
If you have a job, he’ll blend right in, charming your colleagues and subtly gaining their favor, leaving an impression that makes it hard for anyone to forget you. He’s naturally resourceful, too, so he takes a look at your finances, maybe even setting aside a bit of extra money “for emergencies” (which, of course, he intends to use for things he thinks you’ll need down the line).
Meanwhile, back in Twisted Wonderland, you’re adjusting to the gritty pace of Ruggie’s life in Savanaclaw. His resourcefulness is evident in every little aspect of his world — from balancing odd jobs to navigating the intense social structure under Leona’s rule. You feel the constant need to stay alert, manage his reputation, and keep up with his never-ending hustle. It’s a life of quick thinking, constant negotiation, and clever shortcuts that keep you on your toes, giving you a firsthand taste of Ruggie’s way of surviving in a world that doesn’t make things easy. You made a note to dote on him when you get back to your body, he deserves.
#yandere twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland#yandere azul#yandere jade#yandere floyd#yandere ruggie#yandere ridde#yandere jamil#yandere kalim#riddle x mc#riddle x yuu#riddle x reader#jamil x mc#jamil x yuu#jamil x reader#kalim x mc#kalim x yuu#kalim x reader#azul x mc#azul x reader#azul x yuu#ruggie x mc#ruggie x yuu#ruggie x reader#jade x mc#jade x yuu#jade x reader#floyd x mc#floyd x yuu#floyd x reader
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AN: This is long so be prepared 🫣
Synopsis: You and Joe had been infatuated with each other since you were both fourteen years old. Something happens in your senior year, causing you to have to break up with him and also making you have to hold onto a secret; giving birth to his firstborn child that he never knew existed.
Pairing: Ex-boyfriend!Joe Burrow x Ex-girlfriend!Reader
Do not engage if you are underage
Please Do Not Repost My Content Anywhere
The sun visor in your car came down with the swift movement of your hand so you could gaze in the mirror at your appearance. After applying another layer of lip gloss, you straightened out your necklace that contained his initial which was gifted to you from him on your sixteenth birthdays.
First it was meant for him, Joseph.
Now it was also meant for the little one you two made who wasn't quite so little anymore, Julian.
And after more than ten years, you still had it.
The only time it ever left its rightful place was when you had to clean it.
You still remember the conversation that you had when the two of you were just fifteen about the future that you planned to share with one another.
The two of you were laying down in Joe's backyard on one of the many blankets that your grandmother had knitted staring up at the night sky. It was one of your favorite past times between the both of you.
“So, what are we naming our kids when we have them?” Joe asked as he looked down to see you pick up your head from his chest to look at him.
“Hmm, never thought about it until just now.”
“After we're married of course. I'll be playing in the NFL and you'll be an aerospace engineer at NASA.”
“I don't know if I'm smart enough for all that.” You replied and Joe instantly frowned from your response.
“You are smart enough. Stop talking about yourself like that and selling yourself short.”
“Fine, I'm going to be an aerospace engineer at NASA.”
“That's better and I just thought of a name.”
“Tell me. But we need a name for a boy and a name for a girl so whichever one comes first we'll be ready.”
“I like Julian for a boy. His name will start with a J like mine.”
“You don't want him to be named after you?”
“No, I want for him to be able to have his own identity.”
“Good point and I like Julian too. Now for a girl.” You said as you adjusted to make yourself more comfortable.
“Juliet since you like Romeo and Juliet so much and I have no idea why.”
“Um, correction! I like the movie with Leonardo Dicaprio, there's a difference. Because truth be told they were both stupid as hell. How can you love someone after you've known them for like 2 hours?”
“Are you going to leave him for me?” Joe playfully asked and you rolled your eyes.
“Joseph, don't be stupid. It's us until the end of time, you know that and he is way too old for me.”
As you closed the mirror, you turned around to look in the backseat to see your son looking down playing his game and you called his name to get his attention.
“Julian.”
“Yes, mom?”
He looked up at you with those same blue eyes that his father had and you quickly sighed.
“Let’s make this quick so we can get in and out. Did you still want spaghetti for dinner?” You planned on staying the night at your sister's apartment before making the two hour drive to Cincinnati to your new house. You told her that you would cook dinner since she told you she couldn't even boil a pot of water.
Just like it was when she was 14.
“I guess.” He told you as he shrugged.
“What's that look for, bubs?”
When he was quiet, you immediately knew.
“I know you're nervous about us moving and starting at a new school, but you'll be fine. And besides, you have football camp in a few weeks to look forward to, that your aunt was nice enough to sign you up for.” You told him and he sighed but nodded his head nonetheless.
After you had gotten pregnant your senior year in high school, your mom was the first one to find out and within a week, you were in Texas with your grandmother and refusing to have an abortion like both of your parents wanted.
You had been there ever since.
After finishing high school with literally a month left, you went off to go to Texas A&M University on a full scholarship and then onto Harvard online to do your masters. From that time, you stopped talking to your parents and in turn they didn't allow you to talk to your siblings, Sabrina and Ryan.
You were one of the top engineers at your job in Texas and they recently opened a new facility in Cincinnati and asked you if you would be willing to transfer to get it off the ground.
It took you three months to finally make a decision.
The final thought as to why you were willing to do it had everything to do with Julian.
He was getting older and just about every week he was asking about his father.
His father, who was in fact Joe Burrow the quarterback of the Cincinnati Bengals.
Who also happened to be his favorite player who he was obsessed with.
He didn't know about Joe and Joe didn't know about him.
But that wasn't by choice.
It all boiled down to your parents as well as his, but mainly his mother.
Your younger sister had begged you to come and see her once she messaged you after she found your account on social media once you told her you were moving back to Ohio. However, you made her promise not to tell your parents. If she uttered a word, you would have no problem cutting her off because protecting yourself as well as your son was your main priority.
“Can we make brownies too?”
“With vanilla ice cream and caramel sauce on top.” You replied as you stuck your pinky finger out for him to wrap his around yours.
–
Robin did a double take as she noticed you in the aisle comparing two brands of pasta and could feel the color drain from her face.
She knew it was you, there was no denying it. You looked the same, but more mature.
She wanted to leave the aisle as soon as possible, but it didn’t quite work out that way since she also needed a box of noodles for dinner.
Hoping you wouldn't take too much notice of her, she made her way over and picked up the brand that she had always bought when you suddenly turned around and she caught your eye.
The expression that flashed across your face was unreadable as you were analyzing her. You were staring at one of the four people that had ripped your future away from underneath you.
The future that you and your boyfriend had planned in high school.
She was the first to speak and you were surprised she was even speaking to you at all. Considering what she had done.
And how much she didn't like you.
“Y/N?”
“Mrs. Burrow.” You flatly said as you threw the box of pasta in your basket.
“I… it's nice to see you.”
“Hmm.” You told her and quickly noticed that you had lost sight of Julian, but more than likely he was somewhere in the candy aisle. But to your surprise you heard his voice from behind you.
“Mom!? Can I get fruit loops!?”
When Robin set her eyes on who she assumed was her grandson, there was absolutely no denying it.
He looked similar to her youngest son except for the fact that he had curly hair which she assumed he got from you. Everything else was Joe up and down.
“You can get the small box.” You replied as you smiled at him go back down the aisle and turned back to Joe's mother.
“Does Joe know you're here?” She said in a soft voice and you were confused on why she even cared.
“What difference would it make if he did?”
“Is he…?” She asked assuming she was talking about Julian and wanted confirmation.
“He's nine and will be ten in December so you do the math and I know you see the resemblance. But for now I'm going to go so I can feed my child. Don't worry, everything is all still going according to your plan. But it's getting kind of hard to keep this a secret, right? I mean paying off your son's girlfriend's parents to keep them and her quiet about the pregnancy so that his future wouldn't get derailed.”
“Who told you that? And I did it for the both of you.”
“Bullshit. You never liked me to begin with and it didn't take a rocket scientist to figure that out and it doesn't matter who told me. You always had it in your mind that I wasn't good enough for him. All I know is that my son is going to know his father one way or another and there is nothing you'll be able to do about it. Good luck begging him for forgiveness. I hope you have a good night.”
Without another word you walked away from her and found Julian in the next aisle holding his box of cereal and browsing the candy aisle just as you suspected.
“We're making brownies, King Julian. So, no candy.” You said as he turned around to look at you.
“But I also need a snack before dinner and who was that lady you were talking to?”
“Stop trying to change the subject and no you don't.”
“Yes I do and I noticed she kept staring at me.”
“She wasn't anyone that you need to worry about because she isn't important and you can get one other thing. Now come on, your Aunt Sabrina is waiting for us.”
“Is she younger or older than you?” Julian asked as he grabbed a Snickers bar.
Just like his father.
“Younger and how old do you think I am?”
“Well I know you're old enough to have wine so you have to at least be 21. How old is she?”
“25.”
“Oh, never mind then.”
–
“I just can't get over how big he is and how much he looks like Joe.” Sabrina told you as the two of you were sitting at the kitchen table and her gaze was on Julian in the living room watching Netflix.
“The older he gets, the more and more he looks like him. Guess who I ran into at the store before coming here?”
“Who?”
“His mother. She saw me first.”
“Oh shit. And what did she say!? I know for a fact she never liked you. Anyone could see that.” Sabrina asked as her eyes went wide.
“First she was like it's good to see you and then asked if he knew I was here and I asked her what difference would it make if he did? And I basically told her to get out my face. And you’re right, she never liked me and I know for a fact that she thought I wasn't good enough for him or dare I say it the right ‘fit’”.
“I still can't believe how everything went down and how they never told him. Like that's their grandson. You two were supposed to be end game.”
“I know and I just… I hope when I gather the courage and strength to tell him that he wants to be in his life. Julian keeps asking about him and all he talks about is how he's his favorite player. I also hope that Julian won't despise me for not telling him.”
Little did you know that Sabrina had signed Julian up on purpose for the football camp. Not only because you told her how he loved to play but because she knew that Joe was hosting it along with Ja’Marr and Tee. She was going to make sure Joe knew sooner rather than later about how his ex-girlfriend fell off the face of the earth with his kid.
This had gone on long enough and wanted to see her big sister get her redemption story.
“From what I've seen, I think Julian will ultimately be relieved. It wasn't your fault to begin with and it's not like you hid it from him on purpose. And our parents were dead fucking wrong with how they treated the entire situation and I'm sorry that happened. I know I'm not responsible, but I also lost my big sister in all of that. And I'll never forgive them for it. It was like you disappeared off the face of the earth. And I never stopped asking about you.”
“I figured that out of everyone that you would. So when you messaged me, I got excited, not going to lie.” You said being completely honest.
“I only talk to them if it's absolutely necessary. The entire dynamic changed when you left. Do you ever think you'll talk to them? Can't blame you if you decide not to.”
“Probably not the best idea to talk to the people who wanted you to abort your kid.”
“Hmm, I guess not and you make a good point. But enough about that, what have you been up to? Do you really work for NASA?”
“Yes, as an aerospace engineer.”
“Like you always wanted. You were always smart as hell and could run circles around all of us. Only thing I know how to do is hair and make up. The parents were very mad when I dropped out and went to cosmetology school.”
“At least you figured out what you wanted to do and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. There are still people who are 45 years old and don't know.”
“Good point.” You told her as she got up to get the brownies out of the oven that all three of you had taken part in making earlier.
“Oh and the day of football camp is my orientation so I won't be able to take him. Do you think you'll be able to?” You asked and Sabrina tried not to show the disappointment on her face.
“Yeah, sure.”
“But I should be there by lunch time. So I can see him play for the second half of the day. He's really excited to go.”
“Perfect! And I'm really excited too since I have never seen him play before.”
The wheels immediately started to turn in Sabrina's head and she just hoped and prayed that everything was going to work out exactly how she wanted it to.
The day of football camp, Julian had been bouncing off the walls from the moment he woke up. As promised, Sabrina stayed over the night before so that she wouldn't have a long morning in rush hour traffic trying to get to your house and then eventually the stadium on time.
To her surprise, when she got there and signed Julian in, Joe was nowhere in sight but she was still holding out hope as she looked over at Julian in his black jersey with his rightful last name across the back of it.
She learned last night that he had a jersey in every color, which had been your doing of course.
You had explained to her that every day was a battle on if the day finally arrived that you were going to tell him the truth. I mean what possible harm could it do at this point? When you were younger, you had been terrified of your parents, but not anymore and you were done keeping your son a secret.
When you finally gave birth to him on December 10th which also happened to be your birthday along with Joe's, you were instructed to not even give him the Burrow last name which was a part of the deal that was made between both sets of parents.
A deal that neither you nor Joe was a part of.
And none of them showed an ounce of remorse for what they had done.
About two hours or so into the day, Joe made his way to Paycor stadium since Ja'Marr had asked him and Tee to participate in a football camp with him for kids ages 5 to 17.
Tee had sent a text to let him know where they were and after parking his car and walking into the stadium he made his way over and was immediately greeted by the both of them.
“Joe, we think we found your long lost son.”
Ja'Marr joked with him as he gave him an eye roll in return.
“What in the world are you talking about? It is too early for your nonsense and Tee is no better for going along with you.” Joe told him and Tee held his hands up in defense.
“Now what did I do!?” Tee exclaimed while looking at him.
“An entire list so don't get me started now what kid are you talking about?” Joe asked and he followed Ja'Marr’s gaze to see.
“That one and look at that, he plays quarterback.”
“He is literally you with curly hair and freckles.” Tee added as he would glance at Julian and then glance back at Joe comparing the two.
“What's his name?” Joe curiously asked as he was watching him do drills.
It was almost as if he was looking in a mirror.
“Mm, Julian I think.”
Hearing the name out loud made a wave of emotions come rushing back towards Joe and he was trying to do his best and not be upset about it.
That was the name you two decided that you were going to name your baby boy whenever it happened.
Because Joe had been dead set on marrying you and he didn't want anyone else.
He still thought about you every day and knew that deep down he would probably never get over not knowing what happened to you and what made you suddenly break up with him for no reason.
It didn't make sense then and it still didn't make sense now and no matter how hard he tried to wrap his mind around it, he just couldn't.
He tried to move on multiple times, but he found himself always comparing his girlfriends to you no matter how hard he tried not to.
You meant absolutely everything to him and you were one of the very few people who believed that he would go on to do amazing things in college and eventually the NFL. From day one, your nickname for him was superstar or MVP.
“Wait…..” Joe started to say, but his focus was now solely on Julian.
“What?”
"Me and my ex-girlfriend picked out the name Julian for our son when we were in high school.” He said nonchalantly as he shrugged his shoulders.
“Uh? You didn't get her pregnant did you?”
“No, she definitely would have told me. But it was weird because one day we were planning our future together and the next she was breaking up with me. The entire thing never made sense. I literally haven't seen or heard from her since we were 17. What's his last name?”
“Deveraux.”
At that very moment as soon as the name left Tee’s mouth, Joe thought that he was going to throw up.
Ja'Marr and Tee both looked at him confused.
“Uh? You okay over there?”
“No. That's her last name.” Joe quietly said as he pinched the bridge of his nose.
“I… well maybe it's a coincidence.”
“How!?! That isn't a common last name!”
“And you having a mini meltdown isn’t helping the situation either. We’ll figure it out later when camp is over. For now we need to break them off into groups based on their age and get them ready to play against each other.”
The camp was only supposed to last from 9 am until 3 pm and as promised, you were actually allowed to leave early and looked down at your phone to see that Sabrina sent you the address to where it was held. Once you put it into your GPS since you were still learning your way around Cincinnati, the Paycor stadium popped up on your phone and you did a double take.
No.
Absolutely not.
But you also thought, it was still the off season and training camp wouldn’t start for a few more weeks. The likelihood of you actually running into him was slim to none. So that way you still had time to process and run through what you were going to say to him when you actually saw him.
Because it was bound to happen one way or the other.
All because his mom saw you and will more than likely tell him but fail to mention the child that you two share.
Once you got there, you spotted Sabrina’s car and quickly backed in next to her before making your way to one of the many gates that surrounded it to make your way inside. Once you told them you were here for your son, one of them was nice enough to walk you over to the field where all the parents were gathered. You quickly spotted Sabrina and she waved you over.
“Sabrina….”
“What’s wrong?”
“Why didn’t you mention that the camp was going to be held here and hosted by several Bengals players?”
“Oh, that? Um, I didn’t realize until we got here.”
“You were always bad at lying so I suggest you change your answer.” You told her as you crossed your arms and looked out towards the field and spotted Julian.
“Okay fine. I figured the sooner that Joe knew about Julian, the better. As soon as I saw that they were doing a camp before they started training camp in a few weeks, I immediately signed him up. And this was right after you told me that you were moving back here.” She whispered to you and you let out a deep sigh.
“I don’t know if I’m ready to see him yet. He probably still hates me for what I did to him.”
“But that wasn’t your fault.”
“Well, he doesn’t know that. Like you didn’t see the look on his face when I broke up with him. He looked so confused and hurt and I couldn’t tell him that I wasn’t doing it because I wanted to. I was doing it because both sets of parents made me. Have you even seen him yet?”
“Yes and he cut off all of his hair and dyed it blonde…. Again.”
“I remember when I dyed it blonde for him our senior year.”
“And got it all over our bathroom. Good times.”
“But, take a deep breath. He probably misses you more than you know.” Sabrina told you as she tried giving you words of encouragement but all you were doing was trying not to have a panic attack.
“He’s probably moved on and honestly when I think about it, it’s probably for the best. Hopefully it’s someone that his parents approve of.”
“Will you stop talking down about yourself? You were his first love and I’m sorry, that doesn’t go away overnight, it just doesn’t. The two of you were attached at the hip and I know for a fact that the two of you can get back to that and raise Julian together. Also, I want to be a bridesmaid when the time comes.”
“SABRINA!”
“What?!?! I’m just being honest. “
“A lot has to occur for that to even happen.”
“How much do you want to bet he has a ring picked out for you? And I see you’re still wearing the necklace he gave you on your 16th birthday with his initial. So, I rest my case.”
Sabrina knew for a fact that he had a ring for you since the day after you left because she had seen it, he immediately cornered her in a hallway at school to see what happened. At that time, she didn’t know, but all she did know was that your room was empty and that she was missing her big sister.
As Joe had finished helping the kids in his group put on the flags to get ready to start the game, he jogged to the sideline and as soon as he looked to his left, his jaw hit the floor and he started hitting Ja’Marr’s arm.
“OW! What is going on?!”
“That’s her and her sister Sabrina. Fuck that’s her, it’s really her.”
Ja’Marr followed his gaze and saw you talking to who he assumed was your sister and his eyes went wide.
“I… wait a minute…. Y/N is black?!”
“Uh yeah why is that important?” Joe asked him as Tee had come to stand next to them.
“It’s not…. I just wasn’t expecting her to look like THAT. I thought you said Athens only had like 2 black people? Damn, she’s pretty, how did you pull that?”
“Seriously?” Joe asked and Ja’Marr held his hands up in defense.
“I should have known the way you were eating that fried chicken you had been around some seasoning before in your life."
“Wait…. THAT’S HER?!” Tee asked and they both nodded.
Tee took a moment to look at Julian, you, and then Joe and simply nodded his head.
“You the baby daddy, alright.”
“Joe, stop trying to hide behind me, YOU’RE TALLER THAN ME. And did you forget you just dyed your hair? Y/N can probably spot you from a mile away.”
“I don’t know what to do! Should I go and talk to her?”
“For one of your nicknames to be Joe Cool, that is definitely the opposite of what is happening right now. Yes! Go and talk to her when we’re done or when the kids eat lunch.”
“What if she doesn’t want to talk to me?” He asked and they both just looked at him.
“Are you a hormone raging teenage boy again? I highly doubt that she wouldn’t want to talk to you.”
Meanwhile, you looked over to where Joe was standing next to Tee and Ja’Marr, and the butterflies in your stomach instantly hit you like a ton of bricks.
“Sabrina, he’s right there.” You told her as you tugged on her arm.
“And I hear wedding bells.”
“Seriously?! Now is not the time.”
“It’s the perfect time actually.”
“What do I say if he comes up to me?”
“Uh? Hi? Have you suddenly lost all of your brain cells? For you to be an aerospace engineer, I wouldn’t actually be able to tell.”
“That’s different!”
“The kids are about to have lunch anyway so just go up to him then. You actually should have worn less clothing to be honest so he can see what he’s been missing.”
“Uh no, for one there are children around and two, I just came from my new job so that’s a definite no.”
“Changing the subject for a minute, but Julian is actually really good.” Sabrina said as he watched him run down the field for a touchdown.
“Well, look at who his dad is.” You replied as you shrugged.
“Did he always want to play quarterback?”
“Mm hmm, and wouldn’t take no for an answer.”
“What do you think his reaction will be when you tell him?”
“I honestly don’t know. I know my baby like the back of my hand, but that I’m not quite sure about.”
“The baby who is almost taller than you by the way.”
“If he’s only nine now, I can’t imagine how tall he’s going to be when he stops growing.”
“How tall is Joe?”
“6’4.”
“Oh, so we have a little ways to go.”
When the first game had come to an end, Julian spotted you and ran straight into your arms.
“Hi bubs, are you having fun?”
“Yes! Thank you Aunt Sabrina for bringing me!”Julian said as he was still holding onto you but turned towards your sister.
“You’re very welcome, sweetheart.”
“Mom, before we leave do you think Joe will sign my jersey for me?”
“I'm sure he will if you ask him.”
Sabrina got a small smile on her face as she saw Joe walking up behind you.
“Julian, look. There he is, go and ask him.”
As soon as she said that, the butterflies that had been in your stomach the first time you saw them were there once more.
As you turned around, you were met with the sight of your ex boyfriend that you hadn't laid eyes on in person in close to ten years.
“Um, hi Mr. Burrow, could you sign my jersey for me?” He shyly asked as he held up the orange Bengals jersey with Joe's number on the back of it. He made sure to wear the black one, bring the orange one, and the white one was hanging up in his room on the wall while the other white one was hanging up in his closet.
“Of course I can. What's your name?” Joe asked Julian as he handed him the jersey along with a marker.
“Julian and I play quarterback just like you do. You're my favorite player and I've watched you ever since you played at LSU.” He proudly told him and Joe had to laugh to himself.
Julian had literally been watching him since he was 4 turning 5 and had been intrigued ever since.
“Really? Wow, that's a long time ago.”
“I want to play in the NFL one day like you and thank you for signing it.” He confessed as Joe handed him back his signed jersey and squatted down to his level.
“You're welcome and if you practice and work really hard, there is no reason why you can't make that happen. And listening to your mom is also going to help.” Joe told him as he glanced up at you and winked.
Okay so maybe he wasn't mad like you thought he was going to be.
Julian eagerly nodded as Sabrina grabbed his hand and started to pull him in the other direction.
“Now come on and let’s get in line for some food. Your mom has something that she needs to take care of.” Sabrina said and you looked at her confused.
“Wait, what?”
She grabbed Julian’s hand and mouthed to you ‘talk to him’. Once they were both out of earshot, you heard his voice.
“It’s really you.” He quietly said and you simply nodded.
“And it’s really you.” You replied as your necklace caught Joe’s eye.
“You still have it…” He said more as a statement then as a question as he reached up to play with the charm.
“I'm wearing it for two people now. Joseph Lee and Julian Oliver. Only time I take it off is to get it cleaned and then it goes right back on.”
Joe nodded his head and looked in the direction of where Julian was standing next to Sabrina, you followed his gaze and sighed.
“Yes.” You quietly said and you immediately got a guilty look on your face.
“I…”
“There is so much that I have to tell you and cannot do it in a span of five minutes. But yes. You keep looking at him so I answered your question for you because I know what you're thinking.”
“He looks just like me. How old is he?”
“He’ll be ten on December 10th.”
“The same day as ours.” Joe replied and you slowly nodded your head.
“I know we don’t have a lot of time right now, but please understand that I didn’t break up with you because I wanted to, I did it because I was told to and being a scared teenager doesn’t leave you with a lot of options. Just wanted you to know that.”
Joe slowly nodded his head and you couldn't quite read the expression on his face.
“After the kids are done, can we go somewhere and talk? Just us?”
“Of course, I’ll see if my sister can take Julian.”
“And he has no idea does he?” He asked, referring to Julian and you shook your head no.
“So, all this time?”
“You can be mad at me because I would be too, but I moved back because I was done hiding him. He deserves better than that. I wanted for him to know you and for you to know him because that is ultimately who ended up being hurt by all this.”
“He seems like a great kid. And I expect nothing less if he came from you.”
“He is and he is exactly how I imagined that he would be. Just about everything he does reminds me of you.”
—
Sabrina took Julian without a second thought to give you and Joe time to talk when you had asked her. The two of you decided on one of Joe’s favorite restaurants in the city and made sure that the two of you got a booth in a corner away from everyone else so the goal was no one would bother him.
You were looking over the drink menu, when you could feel Joe staring at you.
“I see some things haven’t changed. Joey, it's not nice to stare.” You told him as you laughed and felt your cheeks heat up and all he did was smile in response.
“Can’t help it if you’re so pretty. Gorgeous now actually. Always been that way.”
“Smooth talker Joe Burrow definitely hasn’t changed.”
It was quiet for a few seconds as both of you were once again scanning the menu when you blurted it out.
“I took a pregnancy test on April 1st because I felt off and before I could tell you, my mom found it.”
“And then what happened?”
“She talked to my dad and in turn both of them talked to your parents...” Joe immediately cut you off.
“Wait, they knew?” He asked and you gave him a slow nod.
“I was told to break up with you and that I had to move in with my grandmother in Texas while your parents paid mine off not to say anything. I only found out about that part last year.”
Joe stayed quiet so you continued.
“So, the day I broke up with you once again, obviously not my choice, a few days later I was on a plane to Texas. My parents said the only way that I would be allowed back in their house was if I got an abortion and I was not allowed to say anything to anyone about it. Of course by now you can see what my answer had been. I haven’t talked to my parents since and I don’t plan to. Looking back on it, I would have done things a little differently.”
“What would you have done differently?”
“Made sure that I told you because that wasn’t fair. You have been thinking for almost ten years that I didn’t want to be with you anymore and that was the furthest thing from the truth and you missed out on knowing your son. We can do a DNA test too to confirm. The last thing that I want anyone to say is that I’m lying.”
When Joe remained quiet, you reached your hand across the table to take his.
“I’m really sorry and I should have told you sooner and…”
“Stop. Y/N just stop.” He told you as he used the other hand to pinch the bridge of his nose.
“I know you’re mad….”
“I am mad, but pissed off is more like it but it’s not towards you.”
“Oh.”
“You had to go through that all by yourself when I could have been there. My son doesn’t even know who I am. I mean technically he does, but not in the capacity that I want him to.”
You slowly nodded as you allowed him to let all of his feelings about the situation be known.
“My parents knew I had a kid and did everything they could in order to keep me away from him.”
“And I missed out on nine years… almost ten.”
It almost looked as if Joe was about to cry, but did his best to compose himself.
“And you named him Julian Oliver, just like we both wanted.”
“I did, but I was told that I couldn’t give him your last name since they took the money or whatever.”
“And here I was thinking that I would never see you again.”
“The feeling is mutual, except on the tv when I watch you play of course. I knew from the beginning how good you were and that you playing in the NFL was bound to happen.” You said as you smiled at the thought of you two sneaking out and going to the park near both of your houses and laying down in the grass to look up at the night sky.
“You did and told me from day one even if I didn’t believe it myself.”
“I know this is a lot to take in but…”
“Just tell me everything, it’s just better to get everything all out in the open once and for all.”
“I mean that's the majority of what happened. I lived in Texas, graduated, went to Harvard. Got a job at NASA…” You started to say as Joe cut you off.
“Wait…. Back up, you actually did it?”
“Yes, you are looking at one of the top aerospace engineers at NASA. I moved back because they opened up a new facility here in Cincinnati.”
“I'm proud of you. I always knew you would end up working for NASA.”
“Thank you and this is the first time I've seen Sabrina too. Because I told my parents I wouldn't get an abortion, I couldn't talk to my siblings anymore. They didn't come to my graduation. I mean, I moved when there was literally a month of school left. I didn't go to prom because if I didn't go with you, it wasn't happening. My grandmother was my only saving grace. I didn't want to leave her and come up here, but she told me that would probably be the best thing for Julian. When my mom or dad would call to talk to her, they never asked about me. That was when my grandmother told me that she cheated on my dad and got pregnant with me and she felt that their relationship would go back to the way it was before it happened if they just got rid of me in a sense. They don't know that I know that. So my mother literally hates me and I don’t know who my actual dad is.”
Joe looked at you in disbelief and every time he opened his mouth to say something, he immediately closed it.
“I'm sorry you had to find out that way and sorry that it even happened at all.”
Before answering, you shrugged your shoulders and waved him off.
“It is what it is.”
“Y/N, no it isn't. That is some heavy shit you've been carrying around for ten years. Have you talked to anyone about that?”
“No and I don't want to. What good will it do?”
“You know better. Priorities can include Julian, but also includes yourself.”
“I guess, but not now. It's just… it's hard trying to wrap your mind around the fact that just about everyone in your life hates you and you were essentially a mistake.”
“You've always talked down on yourself and I see some things never change.”
“Sabrina said the same thing.”
“So that obviously means that we're telling the truth. You have always been the smartest and prettiest one in the room and it's still true now.”
“Even if I am, I'll probably never see it that way.”
After the two of you spent at least 2 more hours with each other, you exchanged numbers and it would be decided when and how the two of you would tell Julian.
The thought was exciting, but Joe was also dreading it. What if Julian despised him for not being there for him as well as you?
But for now, the day ended with a lot for Joe to think about.
Seeing you for the first time in ten years
Oh and the biggest one with you and him sharing a child that you were essentially bribed and threatened in a way to stay quiet about.
Knowing that his parents knew the entire time made Joe sick to his stomach.
He also had a feeling that both Ja’Marr and Tee would have their phones in their hands waiting for an update on what had happened. Before he could send the message that he had just typed, Tee beat him to it.
Tee- 👀👀👀
Uno- Spill the damn tea and stop leaving us in suspense
Joe- He's mine
Tee- I KNEW IT
Uno- Soooo I need details on why you didn't know about this….
Joe- My parents paid hers off not to tell me and made her move to Texas to live with her grandmother. And apparently she would only be allowed to move back if she got an abortion and of course as we can all see, she didn’t
Tee- YOUR PARENTS KNEW!?
Uno- This is some Tyler Perry movie shit 😫
Joe- They knew and pissed off doesn't even begin to describe how I'm feeling right now. I missed out on damn near ten years of my son's life. He has no idea who I am
Tee- Technically he does know who you are
Uno- But still that shit is CRAZY. So are the two of you going to tell Julian?
Joe- Yeah, but I'm getting a DNA test first because Y/N won't take no for an answer and I get it. I know he's mine and she does too obviously but that way no one will be able to say anything about it. We have to decide when we're going to tell him. I don't know how he's going to take it.
Uno- Whatever you need from us, we got you
Tee- Ditto
Joe- Appreciate it. First thing I need to do is confront my parents and ask them why they kept this from me
About a week or so passed and Joe had been ignoring the calls from his parents. He would talk to them a few times a week, but ever since he found out they knew about Julian, he really didn't know what to say to them.
However, he did promise to have Sunday dinner with them and he planned on confronting them and getting this out in the open once and for all.
There Joe was sitting at the dinner table with his parents and pushing his food around on his plate. Both Jimmy and Robin noticed and they exchanged a glance with one another before Jimmy asked if he was okay.
“Joe, you okay over there? It's one of your favorite meals and you've barely even touched it.”
“You know what, dad? No, I'm not okay.” He replied as he set his fork down and looked at him.
“Why? Did something happen?” Robin asked and he was doing his best in order not to roll his eyes.
“Something did happen and I don’t like being lied to.”
“Who lied about something?”
“Apparently the two people who have the title of being my parents tried to hide the fact that I have a child who is damn near ten years old. So, no one was going to say anything?”
Joe looked at both his parents in anticipation as the question he asked them lingered in the air.
When both of them were quiet, he spoke up again.
“Oh, so no one has anything to say?”
“Joseph, we did it to protect you as well as your future.” Jimmy finally spoke up as Robin remained quiet.
“Protect me from what exactly? Because that literally makes no fucking sense and you know it.”
“I don't care how old you are, watch your mouth when you talk to us.” Robin said as she crossed her arms and finally looked at him.
“I can't believe you two, but especially you. When Y/N broke up with me which I learned was your doing all along I came and confided in you not knowing what you had actually done. And let me ask, were you ever going to say anything?”
“I….”
“Never mind because whatever excuse you're about to pull out of your ass isn't worth it.”
“JOSEPH LEE BURROW!”
“NO, I GET TO BE PISSED OFF NOT YOU TWO. I GOT TO MISS OUT ON THE FIRST NINE YEARS OF MY SON'S LIFE BECAUSE YOU TWO PAID HER PARENTS NOT TO SAY ANYTHING ABOUT IT AND MADE HER DISAPPEAR FROM MY LIFE. I PLANNED ON MARRYING HER AND I WOULD HAVE DONE IT IF SHE HAD GOTTEN PREGNANT OR NOT.” Joe had been seeing red from the moment he stepped into his parents house and did not plan on backing down.
“We get you're upset, but let's calm down so we can talk.”
“You should have talked to me almost ten years ago. For now, I'm done. But answer this, forget about me for a minute. How could you do that to your own grandchild?”
“We never wanted to hurt you.”
“Hmm, funny. Because the people who did end up getting hurt were me, Y/N, and Julian. That's his name in case either of you wanted to know.”
“I saw Y/N with him about a month ago when I went to the grocery store.” Robin quietly said and Joe just shook his head at her.
“And you didn't say anything!?”
“When I saw him…. He is literally you up and down. There's no denying it. I know that us saying sorry is not going to cut it but….”
“You're right, it's not. Nothing you say is going to cut it or make me forgive you two for what you did. Y/N had NO ONE. She went through that by herself. Her parents shipped her off to Texas because she refused to get an abortion. I don't care what I would have had to do, she meant everything to me and I would have done anything to make sure that they were both okay. Now when we finally do tell him, he's going to wonder why I wasn't there.” Joe stated as he pushed his chair away from the table and stood up.
“Joseph…”
“I'm done. I don't want to talk to either of you right now.”
Once Joe was settled in his car, he immediately called you on facetime so that he would have you to keep him company on the long drive home that he had. When he pulled out of his parents driveway, you finally answered.
When Joe's face came into view, you could tell that he was upset and that something had happened.
“Joey? Is everything okay? What's going on?” You asked as you got up to head into your bedroom to be able to talk to him without Julian overhearing.
“I just left my parents house.”
“Okay? What is that look on your face for?”
“I asked them why they lied to me for almost ten years and of course no one had a good answer as to why they did it.” Joe breathed out as he pulled onto the highway.
“Oh and my mom mentioned seeing you about a month ago and failed to tell me anything. They're trying to apologize now but for what? Why even do it at this point? You knew what you were doing from the beginning.”
“I don't want to come in between you and your parents. I know how close you are with them.”
“It doesn't even matter. What's right is right and what's wrong is wrong and in this case they're dead wrong. And they also knew how I felt about you and how important you are to me.”
“Joey… hear me out for a second.”
“I'm listening.”
“Your feelings are completely valid and I'm not downplaying how you feel at all. But instead of focusing on being pissed at them, focus on finally being able to be a part of Julian’s life. He deserves you and you deserve him. I need you to be in the right and the best headspace. Do not come around him with that hanging over your head.”
“I… get it. I'm just… I can't believe that they would do that to me.”
“I know, but good news…”
“What is it?”
“DNA results are back and it's confirmed that you're my baby daddy even though we already knew.” You told him and saw a small smile form on his face.
“Now we just have to decide when we're going to tell him.” Joe told you as he sighed.
“Who knows? It might actually go better than we think it will.” Deep down you were not only trying to convince Joe, but convince yourself.
“But what if it doesn't?”
“Then we'll figure out a plan if it comes down to it. Do you want to wait until after training camp?”
“I was thinking the same thing. And maybe you two can come to the first home game of the season? And then we can go from there.” Joe's heart started to beat faster and he wasn't quite sure if it was nervousness or excitement.
“I like that idea.”
As promised, Joe made sure the two of you had tickets to the first home game of the season and the two of you were going to be directly behind the Bengals bench. Joe wanted you to be in his suite, but you told him that Julian had never been to an NFL game and needed to get the full experience.
Joe had sent you a text earlier saying that he couldn't wait to see the both of you and that the two of you should tell Julian after the game.
There Julian was next to you sitting there in awe and munching on his hot dog as he anxiously waited for the game to start. He dragged you as soon as the gates opened so he wouldn't miss anything. That was when you spotted Joe and a few other players come out the tunnel to come and warm up.
“Julian, look up.” You told him and his eyes immediately went to Joe.
“Mom! He's right there and there's Ja’Marr, Tee, and Andrei.”
“I see and look who's walking over here?” You replied as Joe began walking towards the two of you.
“I don't have anything for him to sign!”
“He signed your jersey already!”
“Oh, right. I forgot.” Julian said as he slumped down in his chair and you couldn't help but to laugh.
“Hey Julian.”
“You remember my name?” He asked as his eyes went wide and Joe nodded his head as Julian stood up to stand against the railing.
“Of course I do. And your mom told me that this is your first NFL game in person.” He said as he turned to look at you and wink, making a smile form on your face.
“It is. I usually just watch it at home with my mom.”
“I hope I'm able to see you a lot more this season.”
“Well, you have to talk to my mom, she's the boss.” Julian said and you stifled a laugh.
“I definitely think that I'm going to be able to convince her.”
Julian smiled at Joe as he went back to eating his hot dog and Joe motioned for you to come closer to him.
“Hmm, I knew you would look good in my jersey, but I didn’t expect you to look this good.”
“I figured that you would like it.”
“That’s putting it lightly. So we still on for later?”
“Yeah, I'm cooking so just come by when you're done here and we can go from there. Since it's going to be after the game, I plan on making you a cheat meal. I already texted you the address.”
“I most definitely have missed your cooking so no complaints here.”
“Well ten years have passed and I've gotten a lot better.”
“That isn't all that's gotten a lot better.” Joe told you as he looked you up and down and you could feel your cheeks heat up.
“Joey, go finish warming up and behave yourself.”
“I am behaving! Just calling it like I see it.”
“I beg to differ.”
Even though the Bengals didn't come away with a win, Julian was still excited nonetheless to be able to go in person. You were now standing in front of the stove while Julian was sitting at the kitchen table and playing on his iPad that you had recently gotten him when the doorbell rang and you knew it was Joe since you could see him on the security camera.
“Bubs, can you go see who's at the door for me?”
“Yes, mom.”
Julian basically sprinted towards the door and when he opened it, his mouth hit the floor.
“Hey Julian, your mom invited me for dinner.”
“I… Uh…” He started to stutter and you suddenly appeared next to him.
“Julian, don't leave our guest waiting outside. Invite him in already.” You said as you smiled at him and he immediately moved to the side so that he could come in.
He had a bouquet of flowers in his hands and quickly gave it to you while also hugging you.
If it was left up to you, you would have stayed in that hug forever.
“Pink roses still your favorite?” He asked and you quickly nodded.
“Yes, still my favorite, but now peonies are high up on my list too.”
“I'll keep that in mind for next time. It smells good in here, what are you making?” He asked as he was now following your lead into the kitchen.
“Tacos. Always a good cheat meal and still one of your favorites?”
“Still one of my favorites.”
Watching both Julian and Joe stuff their faces with tacos was comical. It was the fact that they both fixed their tacos the exact same way and you noticed right away. Being that you were so nervous about how Julian was going to react, you didn't have much of an appetite. When Joe finished, he looked up and made eye contact with you as you then took a deep sigh.
It was now or never so let's get this over with.
“Julian, I have something that I need to tell you.”
“Okay, what is it? Are we still going to the aquarium?”
“Yes, we're still going and it's something else. Something that you have been steadily asking me about for a while.”
“A puppy?!”
“Uh no. Not exactly. Julian, Joe is your dad.” You finally said and he looked confused as he glanced back and forth between the both of you.
“Hold on, I don't get it.”
“It’s taken….” You started to say and he immediately cut you off.
“You knew this the entire time and kept him from me?” Julian asked and you knew that shit had officially hit the fan.
“It wasn't that simple, Julian.” Joe immediately spoke up as he looked at him.
“How is it not? I thought you didn't want me but you've been here the entire time.”
“The difference was that I didn't know about you, it wasn’t the fact that I didn’t want you.”
“Julian, just listen for a minute.” You said but he made a face at you.
“Why should I? What else are you lying to me about?”
“I…”
Without another word, Julian pushed himself away from the table and ran upstairs to his room leaving both you and Joe at the table looking at one another.
“Deep down I knew this was going to happen.” You quietly said as you started to play with the ends of your braids.
“I'll go and talk to him, it'll be fine.” Joe told you as he grabbed your hand and gave it a small squeeze before standing up and going to talk to Julian.
Joe took the steps two at a time and there was no denying which room was his, seeing as his walls were covered in any and everything Bengals related.
“Julian, can I come in?” Joe asked him as he stood in the hallway in front of his bedroom door.
He nodded as he angrily wiped tears away from his face.
Joe walked in and sat down next to him and sighed.
“I know you're upset, but don't take it out on your mom.”
“But she lied to me.”
“She didn't necessarily lie, she was just trying to protect you. None of this has been easy for her. And I can imagine that it hasn't been easy for you either.” Joe explained to him and Julian quickly nodded letting him know that he agreed.
“She has done an amazing job taking care of you and I'm very thankful to her for it. But now you also have me. If I would have known from the beginning, things would have been a lot different. But we can't do anything about the past. We just have to focus on the future and move forward. Do you agree?”
“Yes.”
“Good now can I get a hug and you go back downstairs and apologize to your mom? I don't think what you said made her feel all that good. And we don't want to hurt her feelings, right? Because you don't like when people hurt your feelings right?”
“No, I don't like it.”
“Now come on so we can get some of the cake your mom made.”
“Okay.” Julian said as he quickly hugged Joe's side and nodded his head.
“I'm glad you're my dad and not Patrick Mahomes. I don't like the Chiefs and I wouldn't be able to fake it either.” Julian added and Joe had to stifle a laugh.
About a month and a half went by and Joe would spend as much time as he could with Julian on his off days seeing as though it was the middle of the season.
It was almost as if no time had passed and Joe quickly fell into the role of being a father. He made sure to call Julian every night before he went to sleep and also used that opportunity to talk to you. Your current thought process was not being sure if rekindling the relationship between the two of you was in the cards. Truth be told, that would definitely be the icing on the cake, but you weren't exactly quite sure what Joe wanted and he didn't mention it to you either. But the most important thing was him having a relationship with Julian.
And for now, you were content with that.
You were currently working from home and it was the early afternoon when your phone started ringing. Glancing down, you saw it was Joe and a wave of butterflies had hit your stomach and quickly answered.
“Yes, Joseph?
“Don't do that. Am I in trouble? You only did that when I was in trouble.” He asked and you laughed as you shook your head.
“Hmm, depends. Have you done something that would warrant you to be in trouble?’
“I don't think so, so let's go with that.”
“Everything okay?” You asked as you plugged in your laptop to prevent it from dying.
“Yeah, it's fine….” Joe started to say and then trailed off and he would always do this if he knew he was about to say or do something that you weren't completely on board with.
“I can still read you like a book. Spit it out.”
“Okay, just…. Keep an open mind with what I'm about to ask.”
“Okay, go ahead. I'm listening.”
“I want Julian to meet my parents.”
It was quiet for a few seconds and even though he couldn't see you, you were shaking your head.
“No.”
“Y/N, just hear me out. Julian has literally only been around you and your grandmother since he was born, right? For the most part?”
“And that wasn't my choice. It was decided for me.”
“He should have the opportunity to know who his grandparents are.”
“The grandparents who wanted NOTHING to do with him? Do I have that right?”
“I know, but they apologized multiple times for what they did. They know how I feel about it. I literally didn't talk to them for almost a month.”
“So, that makes it okay?”
“No, not at all and I told them that. But they are making an effort because they genuinely want to get to know him.”
“They didn't even allow me to give him the Burrow last name and all of a sudden they want to get to know him? Joey, let's be serious for a second. They probably would have NEVER told you that he even existed if it wasn't for me.”
“Y/N, I know this may be difficult for you but we can't change what happened. All we can do is move forward.”
“Your mother fucking HATES me and she always has.”
“No she doesn't! Neither of my parents hate you.”
“He's just getting to know you, give him some time to adjust.”
“Well we wouldn't be going through this if you would have told me.” Joe shot back at you and immediately regretted it once the words left his mouth.
“We wouldn't be going through this if it wasn't for YOUR MOTHER WHO FUCKING HATES ME like I said before!”
“Where did you even get that from?”
“Joseph, don't be dumb. So I'm going to open the door for her also to hate my child that she wanted no connection to from the beginning? No fucking thank you. If I don't talk to my parents what makes you think I want to be around yours when they are just as guilty? And I feel like you're downplaying what they did to me! Did to us! How can you not see that?” You asked as you felt a few tears slip out.
You should have known that it would eventually come down to this. You just didn't think it would be so soon.
As in Joe's parents wanting to be in Julian's life too.
“I'm not trying to make you upset. I just…”
“Too late because you already have. I have work to do, so bye.”
Without another word, you hung up the phone and threw it onto the couch behind you while you were doing your best not to cry even harder.
After you had hung up the phone on him, Joe was at a loss. He frustratedly ran a hand through his hair before sighing and attempting to call you back.
When you didn't answer, he came up with what he thought was the perfect idea to get you to talk to him.
A little over twenty four hours later, your doorbell rang and you checked the camera to see that it was Joe and rolled your eyes.
A little over twenty four hours later, your doorbell rang and you checked the camera to see that it was Joe and rolled your eyes.
“Go away, Joseph.”
“Y/N, let me in so we can talk.”
“No.”
“We aren't 17 anymore stop giving me the silent treatment. I know how to bribe you.” He told you as he held up the pizza which you assumed was pepperoni in the camera.
"You're right we're not 17. Which means, I don't give in to your bribes anymore. So there's that.”
"Stop acting like you don't want this pizza and open the door. I also threw in a new telescope for good measure.”
“Wait, you got me a telescope?” You asked as you slowly cracked open the door and peeked your head out.
“You aren't getting it unless you let me in.”
“And what kind of pizza is that?” You asked as you were pointing. You already had a feeling that you knew what it was, but you needed confirmation.
“Your favorite.”
“What's my favorite?”
“What is this? 20 questions? Come on Y/N, let me in already.”
“Then tell me what's in the box!”
“Pepperoni and I got extra ranch on the side now open.the.door.”
“Hmph, fine. But hand over the pizza first.”
“No, not a chance. You're going to take it and slam the door shut. I still know you like the back of my hand.”
You sighed and finally rolled your eyes as you fully opened the door so he could step inside.
Once Joe was fully inside the house, he made his way into the kitchen and set the pizza on the table and went on the hunt to look for plates not knowing if he should take out two or three.
“Where’s Julian?”
“With my sister, so l'm by myself.” You answered as he then took down two plates and brought them over to the table. Opening the box, he slid two pieces on one of them and slid it over to you while also setting the ranch down in front of you.
“Thanks.”
“No problem.”
The two of you were eating in silence when Joe finally broke it.
“You know that I never liked fighting with you.”
“I know.” You quietly answered as you picked a piece of pepperoni off your second slice of pizza and popped it in your mouth.
“So can we come up with some type of compromise?”
Taking a deep breath, you nodded your head before pushing your plate into the center of the table and giving him your undivided attention.
“I know what they did to us and Julian wasn't fair and I'm not trying to downplay it at all. When I finally did answer the phone and talk to them, I explained how I felt and said that they betrayed my trust which I never thought was going to happen since they're my parents. Your hesitation is valid because mine was too when they had first asked. But the more I think about it, he does need to know who his family is.”
“I get that. It's just…. The main thing in the back of my mind is him getting hurt on the same level that we did.”
“They know that if they did that, that they would never see him again and I made that very clear. Because at first when they asked, I had the same reaction as you did and I said no.”
“Okay, I will do it for Julian and I promise to play nice. When did you want him to meet them?”
“You busy Sunday? All of you can be in my suite at the stadium for the game.”
“I’m not and that sounds like a plan. The last thing I said to your mom when I saw her in Athens was ‘good luck begging your son for forgiveness’ and I also told her something along the lines of her not liking me so this should be interesting.”
“You want me to have security at the stadium on standby?” Joe jokingly asked and you smiled at him while shaking your head.
“No need. Julian is my main priority and that will always be the case. As long as he’s happy and taken care of, I’m more than content with that.”
“That reminds me. It’s going to get cold soon so I wanted to take him shopping for some winter clothes. Has he ever even seen snow before?”
“He’d like that and no he actually hasn’t and I have a feeling that he is not going to like it, but he may surprise me so let’s see.”
“I can do it on my next off day. I’ll pick him up from school so you don’t have to worry about doing it.”
You nodded your head as you were deep in thought and Joe grabbed your hand breaking you out of your trance.
“What’s wrong?”
“I just stop to think sometimes on how our lives might have been different if you had known from the beginning.” You quietly answered as Joe nodded his head.
“I do the same thing. I’m just happy that you finally decided that enough was enough and told me.”
“Honestly, I didn’t know how you were going to take it and I was scared out of my mind. I also thought you still hated me after I broke up with you out of nowhere.”
“I could never hate you, no matter what the circumstances had been. And you didn’t know how I was going to take it? He literally looks like the perfect mix of both of us. I couldn’t deny him even if I wanted to. It’s funny that Ja’Marr and Tee actually noticed first. When they told me his name and I saw you, I started connecting the dots.”
“He’s starting to look like you more and more everyday.”
“I have another question for you and it’s okay if you don’t want to answer it.”
“Go ahead.”
“Would you ever talk to your parents again? Or at least try to find out who your actual dad is?”
“It’s not on the top of my priority list and they knew where I was the entire time. If they really honestly did care about me, none of this would have even happened. Sabrina doesn’t even really talk to them and as for my other siblings, I have no idea. Who knows what lies they told them about me. I honestly think that the only people who care about me are you, Julian, and Sabrina. And I’ve always felt like that.”
“And you know I’ll never stop caring about you.” Joe told you as he kissed the back of your hand before massaging it in small circles.
“I know.” You said with a shy smile.
“But enough about that, it’s finally dark outside and I’ll get the telescope out of my car since you did hold up your end of the deal with letting me in the house and it’s evident that my bribes do still work.”
“Burrow, don’t start.” You said as you pointed to him as he stood up from the kitchen table. He held his hands up in defense before smiling at you.
“Just calling it like I see it.”
–
“Joey! That piece doesn’t go there, it goes over here!”
“That’s not what the picture says!”
“Are you looking at the picture or reading the actual directions?”
“Umm, kinda both.”
“Hand it over to the actual aerospace engineer please.” Joe did as he was told but not before he rolled his eyes and pinched your cheek making you laugh.
“I am so fucking proud of you for making it happen. I always knew that you were going to do it.”
“Thank you, Joey. I can give you credit for telling me to go for it and not sell myself short. Julian was also my motivation. I had to be able to make enough money to take care of both of us.” You told him.
“And now you don't have to worry about doing it all by yourself anymore.”
Once you finished putting the telescope together, the two of you spent some time looking through it until you grabbed one of your fluffy blankets to lay on the deck in your backyard allowing the two of you to lay on it.
It was an usually warm night in October and you figured that you better enjoy it before the winter air kicked in. The two of you were simply gazing up at the night sky which you both did often when you were younger when Joe wrapped his arms around you and you moved to lay your head on his chest.
“I can’t even tell you how much I’ve missed this.” He whispered in your ear as you nodded in agreement.
“Me too.”
“I figured that you would have been married by now and forgot all about me.”
“How could I forget about you when people were saying your name everywhere I turned? And besides, I kept up with what you were doing. I was very excited when you entered the transfer portal and went to LSU. Being a backup quarterback didn’t fit you very well since I knew how amazing you were. And I honestly thought you would have been married by now.”
“You never let me forget it either. And I wasn’t marrying anyone who would be in your rightful place. Only person that I was ever going to make my wife was you. What I told you when we were seventeen hasn’t changed.”
“Just patiently waiting for you to win MVP and I know that it’s coming. And I know Julian would want nothing more than for all of us to be under one roof.”
“I want this with you. We get to do it right this time and no one can tell us no.”
Nodding your head in agreement, Joe turned your head to face him as he leaned over to kiss you. You eagerly kissed him back as both of your hands were exploring each other’s bodies. As Joe took the bottom of your shirt in his hands, he broke the kiss and searched your eyes for permission before he proceeded. When you nodded your head, your shirt was then peeled off of your body and thrown to the side as he comfortably moved you to the side so that he could hover above you.
At this moment, you were thankful for your fenced in backyard and the fact that your house wasn’t very close to anyone else’s. So the likelihood of the two of you getting caught was slim to none.
The next piece of clothing to come off of your body was your bra as Joe started to place several feather-like kisses all over starting from your neck as he worked his way down. His tongue lightly grazed one of your nipples before taking it fully in his mouth and slowly beginning to suck on it making a quiet moan slip from your mouth. He soon switched sides before you tugged on his shirt telling him to take it off. Once he did, he added it to your pile of clothes to the left of you before moving downward and slipping off your leggings that you were currently wearing with nothing underneath.
He quickly spread your legs and settled himself in between them as his mouth finally made contact with your core.
Joe continued to pleasure you as he heard your soft whimpers and inserted one of his fingers as he started pumping it in and out of you. Your hands quickly made a way into his hair as you tried to pull him as close as possible to you.
“Shiiit.” You quietly said as Joe wasted no time adding another finger while his focus was now solely on your clit.
“Mm, Joey.”
“You gonna cum for me, baby?” Joe asked as his mouth left your clit for a quick second before going right back to it.
Not being able to utter another word because of how much pleasure you were in, you simply nodded your head.
You didn’t know how much time had passed, but before you could tell Joe that you were close, You quickly squirted all over his face, However, he didn’t move a muscle as he tightly held onto your legs and still gave you as much pleasure as possible.
“Baby… mmm… Joey, I can’t….” You told him as you were doing your best to attempt to move away from him so you could somewhat recover from the constant feeling of you hitting your peak over and over again, but he obviously wasn’t letting that happen.
Being as bold as he was, he held eye contact with you the entire time, making you shake your head at him. When he finally came up for air, he placed several kisses all along your thighs before moving back up your body to place a kiss on your lips, which you gladly accepted and gave him several more.
“You are such an ass.” You whispered against his lips and all he did was laugh at you.
“Now, is that how we treat someone who just made you cum not once, but multiple times?”
“Hmm, yes because I know that you aren’t going to do anything else about it, but make me cum more and make me beg for mercy like you just did.”
“Good girl.”
“I see not much has changed.”
“But I see something on you has.” He replied as he began to play with your nipple piercings before leaning down and sucking on them.
“I figured that you would like that.”
“But I know that I’m going to love being inside you more. You ready for me?” He asked as he slipped another finger back into you. He took it back out and eagerly began sucking on it as he peered down at you.
Nodding your head, Joe slipped off his sweatpants along with his boxers and lined himself with your entrance.
“I know that you don’t have a lot of neighbors, but we still need to be quiet. Think you can do that for me, baby girl?”
“Yes.”
“You promise not to make a sound?” Joe asked you as he inserted himself in you at the same time making you gasp.
“Hmm, that wasn’t quiet. Don’t let it happen again.” He whispered in your ear as he began pounding into you.
Your arms had now wrapped around his neck as his head was resting on your shoulder. It was taking everything in you not to make a sound and you knew that as hard as you were biting down on your lip that blood had probably trickled out of it.
A small moan slipped out and Joe immediately stopped his movements and picked his head up to look at you.
“I thought I said not a sound, baby girl? And you were doing so well.” He told you as he pulled all the way out before slamming his hips all the way back in making you gasp.
Joe reached down to sloppily kiss you as he continued to move in and out of you with you trying not to make a sound. Your hands went back around his neck as he movements became sloppier indicating that he was close.
“Joey…. I’m close.”
“Hold it until I tell you to.”
“But…” You quickly protested, but all Joe did was shake his head, indicating that he didn’t want to hear it and that you had better listen to him.
It was taking everything in you to not let go right then and there as he was still going, but when you finally heard his voice, you wasted no time.
“Now you can.” He whispered against your lips as both of you came at the same time. Joe made sure not to finish inside you and his cum was covering the lower half of your stomach before you sat up and caught him off guard with you taking him in your mouth.
“Oh shit, babe.”
He made sure to move your hair out of the way as you continued to pleasure him as you also kept eye contact with him the entire time. The use of your hands also helped when your jaw was quickly becoming tired.
It didn’t take long for you to taste his cum at the back of your throat once he released in your mouth and milked him until the very last drop. Once you were finished, you laid back down on the blanket as Joe laid down next to you before pulling you on top of him and kissing your forehead.
“I’ll give you ten minutes and I think we need to go inside for the second round because I know for a fact that I’m going to have you screaming.” Joe told you as he smirked and leaned over to kiss you.
It was now Sunday and as promised, it was the day that Julian was going to meet his grandparents. You were nervous to say the least, but at this point in time, it is what it is. You and Joe both compromised and you were going to uphold your end of the deal.
Julian actually didn't know that he would be meeting them. All he knew was that he was going to get a chance to sit up in his dad's suite and watch the game.
You and Julian would be wearing matching jerseys, along with jeans and your pandas to top it off.
As you were laying out your clothes to wear later, you got a facetime call from Joe and quickly answered.
“Good morning, Joey.”
“Good morning, my love. You ready for later?” Joe asked as you could see him moving around in his bedroom.
“I should be the one asking you that.” You replied as you sat down on your bed next to your outfit.
“I'm good. About to leave the house in a few. Excited to see you as always. And my baby boy of course.”
“And your baby boy is excited to see you play as always. Wouldn’t stop talking about it from the time that I told him.”
“Where is he? I want to talk to him before I leave.”
“Hold on. Julian! Come here for a second.”
“Coming mom!”
Once he came into your room, he was all smiles as he hugged you before sitting next to you on your bed.
“Someone wants to talk to you.”
“Is it dad!?” He excitedly asked as you handed him your phone.
“See for yourself.”
Once Julian saw his father on the screen staring back at him, his smile got even wider if that was possible.
“Dad!”
“Hey King Julian, I'm excited to see you later.”
“Me too! Me and mom are wearing the white jerseys with our pandas so we can match you!”
“Definitely take a picture once you two get dressed and send it to me. And Julian?”
“Yes?”
“You have to promise me to be on your best behavior today. I know you usually are, but I just needed to remind you. I have some special people coming to the game to meet you.” Joe told him and Julian nodded in agreement.
“I will, I promise.”
“And what's my one other rule?”
“Besides being on my best behavior? Listening and protecting mom.”
“Perfect. I'll see you later, little man.”
“Oh! Can we get ice cream after the game?”
“Yes, as long as mom approves.” Joe answered and Julian immediately turned to you and gave you puppy dog eyes.
“I… how can I say no to a face like that? Of course we can.”
“I want rocky road or no…. Maybe bubble gum…”
“Well there's no rush, you have a few more hours to decide.” Joe replied as you noticed that he was now outside walking to his car.
“Okay Julian, let dad go to work and you need to go downstairs and finish your breakfast.”
“But mom, I want a chili cheese dog.”
“I… Not for breakfast you aren't! I will get you one later, promise.”
“But…”
“Julian, what did your mother say?” Joe asked him as he was now driving.
“To wait until later.”
“So we need to be patient, right?”
“Yes. I'll go finish my food.” Julian said with a slight attitude which Joe quickly caught onto and shut down.
“Lose the attitude this instant or we aren't getting ice cream. Didn't we just have an entire discussion about you listening to your mom?”
He let out a deep sigh before nodding his head in agreement.
“Go ahead and do what she told you to do.”
“Okay.”
Julian handed you back your phone before heading back downstairs and you were once again left with Joe.
“He gets his attitude from you.” You said without hesitation and Joe immediately snorted.
“That is one thing that I can actually agree with. Even though your attitude is just as bad.”
“I… it is not!”
“I will never tell you a lie, babe.”
“I'm ignoring you. But good luck today and as always either way it goes, I'm still proud of you.” You told him and he gave you a small smile in return.
“So if I win, victory kisses and if we lose sympathy kisses?”
Once you had arrived at the stadium with Julian and had gotten settled in Joe's suite, the two of you were there by yourselves for about twenty minutes before his parents made their presence known.
“Hi, Y/N.” Joe's dad was the first to speak and you gave him a small smile. Robin was next to him, but you couldn’t quite read her facial expression.
“Hi, Julian, these are the special and important people that your dad wanted you to meet.” You told him and he turned around in his seat to smile at the both of them.
“This is your grandma and grandpa. Your dad's parents.”
“Wait, dad has parents?”
“Everyone has parents, silly!” You explained to him as both Jim and Robin made themselves comfortable.
Robin finally spoke and pulled you to the side to be able to talk to you.
“Y/N, can we talk?” She asked and you looked to see that Jim was explaining something that was happening in the game to Julian and nodded your head.
“Sure.”
Once the two of you were outside the suite in the hallway, she took a deep breath before saying anything.
“I… first off thank you for agreeing for us to meet and get to know Julian. Because Joe’s original answer was no and I can imagine that yours was the same thing.”
“You’re welcome.”
“I want us to be able to put all of this behind us and move forward. Looking back on what I did, it wasn’t right in the slightest despite me wanting to protect my son. You have always been there for him and I knew that you cared about him. I knew once he knew that you were back in Ohio that it would be the same thing. I don’t think telling you sorry is enough and it will probably never be enough. Joe didn’t even talk to us for like a month and a half when he confronted us about it. Even after all this time, when Joe talks about you he lights up. And he does it even more now that he knows about Julian. I hope that you can forgive us for what we did. I know that it won’t happen overnight and that it will take time, but there is no rush. We want to be a part of Julian’s life and a part of yours.”
Clearly taken aback from what Robin had just confessed to you, all you could do at the moment was nod your head.
“Thank you for telling me that. I always thought you hated me when we were in high school so that was your entire reasoning behind doing what you did. But Joe swears up and down that you don’t.”
“No, I didn’t hate you and I still don’t. All I wanted to do was protect his future and was willing to go to extreme measures to do so. I know we hurt the both of you tremendously. I still think about the night Joe came to me in tears because you had broken up with him because we had told you to.”
“I still remember the look on his face, but he told me that he doesn’t hold it against me and knew for a fact that something wasn’t right about the whole thing. One day we were planning our future with each other and the next, I was breaking up with him.”
“That was definitely a dark time for him and that didn’t help when it spilled over to him going to Ohio State as a backup quarterback.”
“I can imagine.”
“But I just wanted to pull you to the side to talk to you. Now let’s go back in and enjoy the game.” She told you as she leaned in to hug you which you quickly returned.
Once you took your rightful spot next to Julian, he turned to you and asked a question.
“Where are your parents, mom?”
“Not really all that important right now, babe.” You replied and you were actually dreading the day that he found out the entire truth as to why he only had you in his life for so long and no one else.
As the game was quickly underway, the Bengals won the toss, but deferred it to get the ball at the start of the second half. Jim and Robin were both making conversation with Julian and you had to smile at how excited he was to meet them despite your protests. But what you weren't expecting was your actual parents to walk through the door.
“Hi everyone!”
Hearing her voice was like nails on a chalkboard and your flight or fight instincts immediately kicked in. You turned around to see both of your parents staring back at you and wasted no time questioning them.
“Why the hell are either of you here?”
“Now, Y/N is that any way to talk to your parents?” The person who calls himself your father asked.
“You aren’t even my real father, so you can pipe the fuck down.”
“OKAY! WHOA! Y/N, we just reached out to them to see if they wanted to come and watch the game with us since we knew that you were bringing Julian with you.” Jim stepped in to say as he put a hand on your shoulder. Meanwhile, Julian was looking at you confused.
“No. They need to leave immediately.”
“Y/N, why are you so upset? We just wanted to meet our grandson too.” Your mother softly said, making you instantly roll your eyes.
“Neither of you have talked to me since I was seventeen when I first got pregnant with him so what in the world makes you think that you have a right to just show up out of nowhere and talk to him? I don’t even want to have anything to do with either of you and I know for a FACT, my son is not going to be around you either.”
“That was a difficult time for all of us.”
“Difficult for who? You made me break up with my boyfriend at the damn near end of my senior year when I had a MONTH LEFT and move all the way across the country to live with my grandmother. Neither of you came to my graduation or checked up on me to see how I was doing and every time you called to talk to her, she would ask if you wanted to talk to me and the answer was always no. I was literally in the hospital in labor BY MYSELF because grandma was out of town on a business trip. A FUCKING NURSE HELD MY HAND INSTEAD OF IT BEING MY BOYFRIEND OR MY MOTHER. DON’T YOU DARE TALK TO ME ABOUT IT BEING A DIFFICULT TIME FOR YOU.”
“Okay, Y/N, baby girl I get that you’re upset…”
“No, you don’t know ANYTHING and you need to….. Where’s Julian?” You asked no one in particular and everyone looked around the room dumbfounded and confused just as you were.
“He was just sitting right there. I… maybe the bathroom?”
“He never leaves without telling me because he knows better. SHIT.”
Meanwhile, Julian was wandering the hallways of the stadium by himself when all of a sudden he was spotted by Mama Tee who he met when he also met Ja’Marr and Tee after one of the Bengals home games. She spotted him too and immediately went up to him and was looking around for you.
“Julian? What are you doing out here by yourself? Where’s your mom? You look upset?”
“We were in the suite and I met my dad’s parents, but my mom’s parents also came and she got really upset. They started arguing and I wanted to leave. I really want my dad right now.” He told her as tears threatened to fall from his eyes.
“I… okay. Well you can’t go to him right this second since he’s playing in the game, but I need to get you back to your mom because she is probably losing her mind. Julian, baby, you can’t walk away and not tell anyone.” She told him as she grabbed his hand and was leading him back towards the suite.
“Dad told me to always protect my mom, but I also know not to interrupt adults when they’re talking so I just left. I don’t want them here and I’ve never seen her like that. I don’t want to be around anyone who has hurt my mom.”
“Okay, how about this? Let’s dial her number so I can tell her that you’re okay and we can go from there.”
Julian nodded his head as she handed him her phone and quickly dialed your number. You answered on the first ring and he could tell that you were upset, not only about your parents, but about him also walking away from you.
“Hello?!”
“Mom!”
“JULIAN OLIVER! Where are you?! You need to get back here NOW.”
“I’m with Mama Tee. She’s walking me back right now.”
“Once you get back here, you are not leaving my sight until you turn eighteen, you understand?” You told him and he nodded although you couldn’t see him.
“Yes, ma’am.”
Julian quickly handed Mama Tee her phone back and she could hear your quiet sobs.
“It’s okay, Y/N, he’s fine. Not a scratch on him. He just got upset because you were upset and he wanted to leave. Of course he told me that he wanted his dad, but I told him that he has to be patient and wait until after the game.”
“I never want to argue or deal with confrontation in front of him but all I saw was red when my parents showed up.”
“He also told me that because they made you upset that he doesn’t want to be around them and that they need to leave.”
“Well lucky for him, his wish has been granted because they literally just left. They offered to help look for him, but I said absolutely not.”
“Well, we’re outside the suite now, you can come and get him.” She told you as you quickly hung up the phone before practically running towards the door and opening it to see Julian looking at you with Mama Tee standing behind him.
Julian quickly hugged you and you were squeezing him for dear life.
“Listen to me, do not EVER do that again.” You told him as you grabbed his face for him to look up at you and he nodded.
“I don’t like seeing you upset or seeing you cry. They made you cry.”
“I… well they won’t be a problem anymore, okay? Promise.” You explained as you wiped a few tears that had fallen on Julian’s cheeks and kissed his forehead.
“Okay.”
“Now, get back in there and watch the game with your grandparents. They were worried about you too.”
As Julian went inside the suite to sit back down, you turned back to Mama Tee and smiled.
“I can’t thank you enough for spotting him and bringing him back.”
“Of course, I know he’s a good kid, and his main concern was protecting you but he also told me he knows not to interrupt when adults are talking. He got upset, so he left.”
“Yeah, that sounds like my baby. I swear that I couldn’t have asked for a better first born.”
“You and Joe definitely have one amazing kid.”
It was now close to eleven at night and Joe had tucked Julian in before coming into your bedroom and falling face first onto your bed with you laughing at him.
“Is someone tired?”
“Definitely, but not tired enough not to spend any time with you.” He replied as he moved to lay his head on your chest as you wrapped your arms around him.
“How did your talk with your baby boy go?” You asked because you immediately wasted no time in telling what had happened during the game when you saw him in the tunnel before his presser.
“He knows now that if he becomes upset, he has to tell one of us before simply walking away. He was upset and I get it, because I definitely told him to look out for you which he was doing. It shouldn’t be a problem again. But, my parents were okay?”
“Yes and they apologized about everything and also apologized about my parents because they didn’t even know the full story. They actually gave me hugs and your theory was confirmed.”
“What theory? And I’m sorry that they basically ambushed you. But you know that you have me and Julian to protect you.”
“Your mom told me straight up that she never hated me and yes my two favorite boys.”
“I told you and you didn’t want to believe me.”
“And she wants to not only be a part of Julian’s life but mine too but she knows that this all isn’t going to happen overnight.” You explained to Joe as he began to play with your necklace.
“I’m going to get you a new one.”
“What’s wrong with this one?!”
“Nothing’s wrong with it, I just figured I could add a few diamonds to it to give it a little upgrade.”
“Fine, not going to argue about that, but I want it in rose gold.”
“Anything you ask for, if I have the ability to get, consider it yours.”
-
One year later
“Julian, you want to hold her?” Joe asked as he was cuddling your newborn baby girl, Juliet against his chest and he eagerly nodded.
“Go sit down over there and I’ll hand her to you.”
As he sat down in the corner of your hospital room, he was all smiles as he looked at his dad in front of him as he anticipated holding his baby sister for the first time. From the moment you told Julian that he was going to be a big brother, he stepped into his role and took it very seriously.
“You ready? You have to make sure you support her head.”
“Okay, I’m ready.”
Joe gently placed her in Julian’s arms and he was in absolute awe.
“She’s so little. Hi Juliet, I’m your big brother, Julian and I love you so much already.” He told her as she cooed and looked up at him with her brown eyes.
Joe recorded the entire interaction on his phone and when he was finished, placed a kiss on top of your head.
“We really did it.” He whispered in your ear as you looked at him confused.
“Did what, babe?”
“We finally got our happy ending. We’re together, married, and have our Julian and Juliet.”
“And it only took maybe ten years.”
“Doesn’t even matter how long it took, we made it happen. Still can’t believe that everyone in the house has the exact same birthday. Now what are the odds?”
“I know like that is literally insane. Now we have four birthdays to celebrate on December 10th.”
“Now, does my wife want sushi since I know these nine months have driven you up the wall with not being able to have any.:
“Yes, please, oh my gosh. I couldn’t get her out of me fast enough. I forgot how much I actually loved it until I couldn’t have any.” You told him and he laughed as he shook his head at you.
“Mom!”
“Yes, Julian?”
“Can I request a little brother, next?” He asked and your eyes went wide as you looked at Joe.
“Um, let’s just try to focus on being a good big brother to Juliet first and then we can see.” He told him as he adjusted the flower headband that was on Juliet, a gift from her grandparents.
“JOSEPH!”
“I… what?! You know it’s hard for me to tell him no!”
“If that’s the case, I’m going to need a lot more than sushi.”
“That’s fine, how about a Birkin?”
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joeyb_9: Finally got our happy ending. Welcome to the world, Juliet Maeve Burrow. Julian is so excited to be your big brother ❤️
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#joe burrow#joe burrow imagine#joe burrow x reader#joe burrow x black reader#joe burrow fluff#joe burrow smut#joey burrow#joey b#nfl imagine#nfl#joe burrow fanfiction#joe burrow fanfic#joe burrow bengals
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Become Your Dream Girl in 2025
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Defining your dream girl persona
The first step into becoming your dream girl is to have a clear picture of her in your mind. Imagine her life in detail; her aesthetic, her habits, and even her energy. This is the time to get specific.
Visualization Exercise: Sit in a quiet space, close your eyes, and visualize your dream girl persona. How does she dress? What places does she visit? What are her priorities and goals? Let yourself feel her confidence, luxury, and elegance.
Create a Vision Board: Gather photos, quotes, fabrics, and colors that represent this version of you. A physical board can go in your room or closet. It can even be a mini collage you can put on your driver's side mirror in your car. The goal is to see your dream girl's life as real and achievable.
Setting New Year Goals
Your dream girl's life needs structure, so let's break down goals into categories and map out the steps to make it happen.
Categorize Your Goals: List your goals under personal growth, style & beauty, health & wellness, and career & financial. For example, under "Health & Wellness", you might set a goal to try Pilates or to cook more at home.
Monthly Check-Ins: As you go through the year, check in with your goals to celebrate your wins, and adjust as needed. This keeps your transformation on track.
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Mindset Makeover
Confidence & Self-Worth
Your dream girl is confident, magnetic, and knows her worth. Let's build those habits and thoughts that help you embody that energy daily.
Positive Affirmations: Every time you look in the mirror, say things like "I am worth everything good that can happen to me" or any affirmation that you feel suits you best.
Confidence Rituals: Small, daily actions add up to huge shifts in confidence. Make it a habit to dress up on casual days, speak kindly to yourself, and embrace good posture.
Let Go of Insecurities: Identify any insecurities and practice reframing them. Instead of "I wish I was more confident", say "I am becoming more confident every day". Over time, you'll notice how these subtle shifts impact your self-worth.
Mindset for Success
Your dream girl is resilient and always growing, so let's make success part of your mindset.
Growth Mindset: View challenges as chances to learn, whether it's a career move, a new hobby, or even a social situation.
Visualizing Success: Each morning, spend a few minutes visualizing yourself living your dream life. This will keep you focused and motivated.
Morning & Evening Routines: Start each day with intention by setting small goals and expressing gratitude. At night, reflect on the day and celebrate your wins; even the small ones.
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Social Life & Relationships
Social confidence comes from feeling at ease in your own skin.
Elegant Etiquette: Show appreciation with thank you notes, and make an effort to remember names. The vibe for 2025 is to go for traditional, rather than modern. Think classic early 1920's-1950's Hollywood.
Curate Your Circle: Surround yourself with supportive, inspiring friends who uplift you. Leave the ones who don't elevate themselves or try to keep you behind.
Networking Lifestyle: Turn social gatherings into chances to meet like-minded people and to elevate your circle.
(Dating) Standards First: Don't settle; know what you deserve in a partner and communicate it confidently.
(Dating) Playful Energy: Be confident, flirty, and assertive (with yourself, not them). Stay in your feminine energy and let them earn your time and attention.
(Dating) Relationship Goals: Keep dates special and playful. Dress up, go out, and enjoy yourself.
Finances & Career Goals
Your dream girl values luxury, but also financial security. Your career is part of your dream girl identity, so elevate it.
Budgeting: Set aside money for luxuries and self-investment, but keep savings in mind.
Multiple Income Streams: Consider side hustles that align with your lifestyle.
Savings Goals: Whether it's for a designer bag, a trip, or just building wealth, make sure your goals are concrete.
Luxury Workspace: Make your workspace a vibe with candles, flowers, and chic decor.
Network for Success: Connect with mentors and people who inspire you.
Grow with Intention: Set milestones in your career or business, and keep pushing for the next level.
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Health & Wellness
Your body is the vessel of your dream girl, so let's treat it with love and care. Mental clarity and peace are essential for dream girl energy; so let's focus on overall wellness this year.
Exercise: Try Pilates or Barre classes for a toned, elegant look. If that's not your thing, find workouts that create your dream body.
Healthy Eating: Focus on whole foods, lots of veggies, and drink tons of water.
Weekly Reset: Plan a mini detox day where you relax, hydrate, and reset for the week.
Mindfulness Practice: Try a short meditation or breathing exercise every morning.
Stress Relief: Whether it's a quick walk, journaling, or a creative outlet, find a stress relief that's all you.
Boundaries: Say no when needed, and make sure your energy is protected.
Beauty & Style Upgrade
First, a dream girl has that glow, and it all starts with a skincare routine that feels luxurious. You also need to find a style that captures your dream girl vibe, and commit to curating it. Then, you need to develop habits that will help you better your appearance.
Simple Skincare Routine (For Starters): Start with a cleanser for your skin type, followed by a hydrating toner, a serum (like Vitamin C for brightness), moisturizer, and SPF.
Luxury Treatments: Invest in facials or try gentle at-home treatments like dermaplaning once a month for an extra glow.
Nightly Routine: Keep your skin hydrated at night with a heavier moisturizer or an overnight mask.
Personal Style Icons: Think of someone like Serena van der Woodsen from Gossip Girl or a high-fashion model off-duty.
Curating Your Wardrobe: Focus on high-quality staples in neutral tones, like blazers, silky blouses, and tailored bottoms. Invest in timeless pieces that make you feel like a billion dollars.
Signature Look: A dream girl has her thing, whether it's an accessory, a makeup look, or a scent. Find what makes you feel like you and stick with it.
Self-Care Rituals: Prioritize manicures and pedicures, hair masks, and bubble baths. Set aside time every week to pamper yourself.
Polished Look: Even on your most casual days, aim to look put together.
Signature Hair & Makeup: Pick a go-to glam look that embodies your dream girl; maybe that's glossy lips and loose waves (for example).
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Lifestyle & Daily Habits
Your routine should feel luxurious yet practical, setting the tone for each day. Small daily habits can transform how you feel and present yourself.
Weekly Pamper Sessions: Set aside Sunday evenings for facials, skincare, and champagne baths! (Be careful and make sure you're of legal drinking age)
Journaling and Reflection: Each morning, write down 3 things you're grateful for and 3 intentions for the day.
Goal Reviews: Every Sunday, celebrate your wins and see if any goals need a refresh.
The Basic Routine: Make your bed, wake up early, and put on an outfit that feels like you.
Energy-Boosting Habits: A quick stretch, a healthy breakfast, and a moment of quiet can make a huge difference.
Wind-Down Ritual: At night, unwind with tea, a bubble bath, or a short meditation to recharge for tomorrow.
Indulge a Little: Get a weekly coffee treat or a luxurious candle that makes your space feel cozy.
Luxury Experiences: Plan for a special outing every month, like a fancy dinner or spa day.
Signature Scents and Cocktails: Find your go-to perfume and a signature drink like a dirty martini or a bubbly glass of champagne.
Conclusion:
Becoming your dream girl is a journey; one that's glamorous, fulfilling, and full of growth. Each step brings you closer to living the life you deserve.
#leveling up#leveling up tips#level up journey#level up tips#leveling up journey#level up#levelling up#high value mindset#high value dating#high standards#high maintenance#high value woman#that girl#self care#personal development#hypergamy#femininity#hypergamous#hyperfeminine#hyperfemininity#hyper feminine#self development#self image#self help#self improvement#self worth#luxury lifestyle#luxury living#luxury#feminine journey
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Home Cooked Meal
CHAPTER 4 | ASHES TO EMBERS
can be read as a stand alone :)
PAIRING: Firefighter!Neighbour!Bucky x Fem!Reader
WARNINGS: Smut (finally) - dirty talk, pet names, oral f and m receiving, fingering, tit play, praise kink, hand kink?, ball play, hair pulling, unprotected PinV sex, aftercare, reader and bucky have dinner, swearing, fluff, let me know if i missed anything!
SUMMARY: You surprise Bucky with a home cooked meal after his shift, and it’s the best damn thing he’s had in years. The pasta was pretty good too.
WORD COUNT: 10550 (ngl i rechecked this three times cuz i didn’t think i wrote this much but turns out i did in fact write over 10k words im sorry lmao)
PREVIOUS CHAPTER // NEXT CHAPTER
Call me when you get home x
Your text still sits on Bucky’s lock screen, read but not opened, as he gets changed out of his work clothes.
It’s fair to say that the message intrigued him when he first read it half an hour ago, just before he left the firehouse. His legs sped up your building stairwell faster than normal, desperate to find out why you’re awaiting his call.
Knowing you would have said so if you were in immediate danger, Bucky sifts through the multitude of possibilities that await him on the other side of the ring tone; none of which ease the butterflies in his stomach.
He walks to his kitchen, phone in hand, to get a glass of orange juice. Pulling up your contact page, he presses ‘call’ and grabs the carton of juice from the fridge door.
You answer after just one ring, eager to hear his voice.
“Hey, Barnes!” God, Bucky loves your voice.
“Doll.” His voice is soft, tone rising at the end with curiosity. “You asked me to call, what’s up?”
The firefighter swoons at the adorable giggle you let out, the sound distant from the mic as though you’ve tried to hide it. “I was worried you didn’t see my text.” You admit.
Bucky pictures you biting your lip anxiously, an accurate prediction for your current state.
“What are you doing right now?”
Glancing down at the yet-to-be-filled glass in front of him, Bucky leans a hand against the kitchen island. “Just about to get a drink, what are-“
“Don’t!” You cut in. “Don’t get a drink, I need you to come over.”
“What, now? What’s wrong?”
“Nothings wrong, James. Just come knock, okay? I’ll see you in a minute!”
And with that, the call cuts off with a dull beep; Bucky brings the phone down from his ear and stares at it in confusion. You’re being weird, never having hung up on him like that before.
Alpine meows from above the fridge, drawing her owner’s attention away from the phone, only to tilt her head at him.
Even Alps is confused.
Deciding to just do what you told, Bucky slips his phone into the pocket of his dark jeans, returns the orange juice to the fridge and sets off for the front door. He finds himself checking over his appearance in the entry way mirror, eyes scanning over his outfit before he smooths out his hair.
Although he won’t admit it, Bucky’s spent a lot more time in front of that mirror lately; checking his collar isn’t twisted, his hair isn’t too messy and there’s nothing stuck in his teeth. The need to look good, to look good for you, hasn’t gone unnoticed by his colleagues.
He considers using the spare key you gave him and letting himself into your apartment but shakes the thought away.
She asked you to knock, Bucky. Not break in.
With one final nod in the mirror, Bucky leaves his apartment, stepping into the hallway he’s spent so many mornings and nights in with you.
Old jazz music greets his ears when he approaches your door, the soft melody sneaking through the cracks of the door frame. Bucky smiles to himself at the thought of you dancing in your kitchen, heart warming when he notices your humming.
Knocking thrice, the firefighter steps back and nervously stuffs his hands into his pockets. You always make him nervous, those darn butterflies stirring in his stomach whenever he’s about to see you. And when he does see you. Actually, they’re there even when he imagines seeing you.
He takes a breath when he hears you shuffling up to the door, but nothing could prepare him for the sight when it swings open.
Rusty red fabric flows from your neckline to the middle of your thighs, small flowers dotted over the slightly orange colour. Two thin straps perched on your shoulders leave plenty of skin on show as your usual sun-pendant necklace sits between the v-neck of your dress. Which, by the way, perfectly presents the soft swell of your breasts.
It takes everything Bucky has to not drool at his breathtaking neighbour, but it takes even more to not dive on you and finally taste those pink lips.
Your skin is ablaze beneath his eyes and you revel in his reaction, the exact response you wanted when you pulled on the dress two hours ago.
“We’re matching.” You grin, taking a moment to enjoy Bucky’s red henley.
“It’s almost like we planned it.” A chuckle escapes him, eyes trailing up from your thighs to meet yours.
“Speaking of plans,” You reach out to pull Bucky closer, tugging his forearms until he pulls his hands out of his pockets, “I have a surprise for you.”
Is it letting me look at you in that dress all evening? Your neighbour thinks - hopes - as you lead him into your apartment.
Closing the door behind him, you take his hand in yours once more to guide him to your little kitchen/diner area. If you weren’t looking ahead, you’d see Bucky’s cheeks flushed pink at your touch. Seeing your hand encompassed with his own will never fail to drive him crazy.
When he eventually looks up from your joined hands, he’s stunned to a halt. You turn back to him when you feel him plant his feet and your features twist into a nervous expression.
“I- Doll, what is all this?” The firefighters eyes are wide at your ‘surprise’.
Your small dining table is set up for two; cream place mats lay beneath charcoal gray pasta dishes with wine glasses sitting at their corners. There’s even a little vase with pink and yellow tulips in between the two spaces.
“Well, remember that time when you told me you haven’t had a proper home cooked meal in years?” You watch Bucky closely as you speak, waiting for some sign of approval.
“You mean this morning?” He turns to you in wonder, thinking back to your conversation as he gave you a lift to the cafe. “I don’t know what to say, doll.”
You roll back on your heels, hands scrunching your dress at your sides. “Is it okay? I know it’s a little cheesy and it’s last minute but I thought it would be a nice surprise for you after working all day. I mean, it’s not exactly at your home but it’s pretty cl-“
Bucky takes two long strides towards you and brings his hands to cup your cheeks; your words die on your tongue when he looks down at you with tender eyes.
“It’s perfect, Y/n.” He smiles, stroking his thumb over your cheek bone. “You could feed me Alpine’s food and i’d still bow at your feet, sweets.”
Now you’re the one blushing. You heart skips when Bucky’s eyes drop to your lips with hunger in his gaze.
“Always so good to me, aren’t ya?” His words tempt a whimper from deep within you, a submissive whine held back by the last of your restraint.
“Well-“
The oven beeps, its sharp tone darting between your bodies and making you step back from Bucky’s hold.
“Uhh” Your mind is all over the place as the firefighter watches you with amusement, “I- I should, I mean- the pasta must be-“
“Go, doll.” Bucky shakes his head laughing quietly.
Your dress sways as you spin away to the stove, stirring various pots and tidying up the counters. Your neighbour watches you in awe, unashamedly enjoying the view; you just look so goddamn sexy in that cute little dress while you cook for him. He wishes he could come home to this every night.
“You need a hand with anything, doll?” Bucky’s voice sounds from behind you.
“Actually, yeah!” You glance over your shoulder. “Come here.”
If you keep bossing him about, Bucky’s gonna struggle not to tear that sweet little sundress right off you.
Settling in at your side, Bucky cocks his head. “What d’ya need?”
You scoop some of the creamy tomato sauce onto a spoon and bring it to Bucky’s lips. “Try this for me.”
With bated breath, you watch his full lips wrap around the end of the spoon, his eyes bearing into yours as he drags the sauce into his mouth.
Bucky has no business looking as dirty as he does in this moment; you watch his adam’s apple bob as he swallows before his tongue juts out to catch a few missed drops. And just when you thought your panties would survive the sight, a moan ripples from his throat and you clench around nothing at the sound.
“Good?” You murmur, hoping he doesn’t notice when you cross your legs.
He notices.
“Delicious,” Bucky takes the spoon from your hand and stretches across you to place it back in the pan, his right hand brushing against the small of your back, “you did great, sweets.”
Fuck. Me.
You regather your composure and ask Bucky to get the wine from the fridge. He pours you both a glass, setting them back on the dining table gently before returning the bottle to its home.
“Hey, could you bring the bowls over, please?” You call over your shoulder.
You plate up the sauce coated pasta while Bucky places the dirty pans in the sink, both working around each other like a fine tuned machine.
Before you can do it yourself, Bucky is picking up the bowls and laying them on the place mats, winking at you as he does so. He pulls your chair out for you, nodding for you to join him.
“For you, Madame.” He jokes, allowing you to sit down while tucking you in.
You watch him round the table and take his own seat. “And they say chivalry is dead.”
Bucky grins at you. The orange glow of sunset shines through your windows, catching your features with grace. Your eyes shine beneath the light and Bucky can’t help but find you angelic.
“You’re beautiful, doll. I don’t know if I said that earlier but, god, you look stunning tonight.”
Dropping your head, you play with the hem of your dress shyly. Your hair falls into your face, forcing you to push it behind your ears, though Bucky wishes he was close enough to do it himself.
With rose tinted cheeks, you look up at Bucky through your lashes. “You say that to all your neighbours, Barnes?” You raise a brow with your teasing voice.
Bucky throws his head back and laughs heartily, a sound you’ve come to adore.
“Only the ones who cook for me.” He winks.
“Doesn’t Ms Scott bring you pies every couple weeks?”
“And I tell her she looks ravishing every time.”
You giggle and tell Bucky to dig in, though you could happily sit and talk all night. While you both stop every now and then for a forkful of food, conversation bounces between you as it always does.
Tonight isn’t much different to a typical evening with the firefighter next door; usually you share some snacks and beers, cozying up on the couch as you watch tv. It’s become ritual for you to send Bucky a video of you playing the piano each evening, his phone playing the video on loop as he sleeps. It’s strange, but the music creeps into his dreams and keeps them peaceful, keeps him away from that burning building.
It’s been a few weeks since the night he was sent home early. Both you and Bucky felt a shift that night; waking up in his arms left you craving more, though you’ve yet to tell him as much. You left him sleeping peacefully that morning when you left for work with only a couple hours of sleep under your belt.
Bucky hated waking up to find the other side of his bed empty, no longer feeling your heat. The note you left him eased the disappointment slightly, your neat handwriting promising to come back in your breaks. Neither of you have addressed how right it felt to sleep beside each other that night, despite spending all of your free time together with unspoken words hanging over you.
Instead, you dance around each other like two ghosts doomed to never touch. The bond between you is stronger than any you’ve ever had, the magnetic lure undeniable for you both.
Your glasses have been emptied and refilled twice now - dinner long since been finished - and you’re starting to feel the buzz; those butterflies in your stomach have turned into a swarm of confidence, your brain taking a backseat from its usual overthinking.
“You expect me to believe that you broke down the door before Sam could? The same guy who beat you at your physical a few weeks back?” You tease the brunette, a challenging brow raised at his rather unimpressed face.
“What are you trying to say there, doll?”
Bucky’s jaw clenches when you tilt your head slightly, eyes shining with amusement beneath the exposed hanging light bulbs.
“Nothing to worry your cute little head about.” You watch Bucky relax into his chair slightly as you reach for your glass with a smirk. “Just that I doubt Sam has any difficulty kicking a door down, not with the way he’s built.”
The scoff to end all scoffs ripples from your neighbours throat; his bright blue orbs glare into you and his features twist into a scowl. Oh if looks could kill…
Bucky’s tone is flat, “Didn’t know you were such an admirer of Wilson’s build, Y/n.”
The lack of a pet name sends your confidence wavering, but not enough to keep you from having a little fun.
“Well, you know,” You bring the glass to your lips, “he’s hardly difficult to miss.”
Watching the deep ruby liquid pass over your lips, Bucky fights to hide the fury that’s flooding his veins, forced to look away from your smug grin.
He knows, he knows, that you’re lying through your teeth, trying to get a rise out of his usually impenetrable facade, and yet he can’t help but feel jealous.
Bucky’s painfully aware that he has no right to feel so possessive, not when he lays no claim to you. But the twist of his stomach is proof that he doesn’t much care.
“Maybe I should just give you his number and you can cook him a meal next time.” Bucky grumbles.
“Oh, that’s alright, I already have his number.”
You’ve never seen Bucky’s head snap up as quickly as it just did, his gaze pinning you to your spot.
“You what?”
Gently, you place your glass back on the table. “Yeah, Steve gave him my number last week so he could get in touch.”
The fire in those blue eyes burns brighter with each word, his body so still that his chest is barely moving when he breathes. In fact, you’re not even sure if he is breathing. Hell, he’s not even sure if he’s breathing.
“Is that right?” Bucky’s gruff voice is laced with possessiveness, the low tone travelling straight to your panties till you swear you feel yourself throb. You wonder briefly if you have a jealousy kink and the sweet arousal dripping from your cunt only confirms your suspicions.
“Mhm.” You hum in response, “In fact, i’m going out for coffee with him next week.”
“Huh.”
Bucky’s chair screeches against the hardwood floor as he pushes himself back. You follow his movements with amused eyes when he stands up and grabs your plates before storming to the kitchen. You twist in your chair, watching him place the dishes in the sink and flick on the tap.
“James, what are you doing?” You ask.
“What does it look like i’m doing?” Oh he’s grumpy, grumpy.
Bucky’s shoulders are tense beneath his tight henley, his sleeves now rolled up as he starts scrubbing at the plates. It’s quiet while he concentrates on his work, only accompanied by the music still flowing from your speaker.
From the corner of his eye, the firefighter sees you rise from your chair, ears honed in on the sound of your feet pattering towards him.
It’s now hard for Bucky to focus on anything but your breath on his neck, goosebumps littered across his skin like a rash. You stand right behind him, tracing your fingers up from the small of his back; Bucky’s muscles tense momentarily before melting at your touch, just like always.
“Ask me why i’m seeing Sam next week.” You order, hands still roaming the taut fabric on Bucky’s back. The command makes him pause and clench his eyes shut. Why are you making him talk about this when it’s tearing him apart?
The brunette turns in your hold but you don’t release him, instead settling your hands on his waist.
“Why are you seeing him, doll?” Bucky sounds despondent, brows furrowed in confusion as he looks down at you.
“He asked me to teach his nephews to play the piano, Buck. I’m meeting him and the boys on Wednesday, Sarah too.”
A shocked ‘What’ tumbles from his lips as the information sinks in, his frown slowly falling away as he processes your words.
“Yeah…” You grin, though it’s more like a smirk, content with yourself proving he was jealous.
In a desperate attempt to save his ego, Bucky rolls his eyes playfully. “I knew you weren’t really attracted to that dumbass.”
You scoff and pat his chest lightly. “Sure you did, Barnes. Now scoot, you wash ‘em, i’ll dry ‘em.”
With his hands on his hips, he stays still as you nudge your way to his side, stretching to the window sill where your dish towels lay. Bucky’s never been in this position before, it’s always him who’s teasing you; this is new territory for him and it irks him that you riled him up so easily.
Once he shakes his head clear, the firefighter returns to face the sink and starts washing the dishes again. You wait patiently while he works, humming along to whichever song is playing.
“You like the old stuff, huh doll?” Bucky grins warmly at the slight sway of your hips, your radiance beaming like a lantern.
You giggle sheepishly and bite your lip, unknowingly sending Bucky spiralling. “I thought it was fitting for tonight, really leaning into the whole ‘housewife’ role.”
He raises a brow, “Does that make me your doting husband then, sweets?”
Realising what you said, your cheeks heat up instantly and your eyes widen. You attempt to backtrack but your words stumble over one another as though you’re a little school girl.
Bucky, however, is basking in the familiarity of control; your rosy cheeks never fail to bring a smile to his face, and boy is he beaming right now.
“I meant- It’s- You know what I meant, James.” You shoot daggers at him, though the idea of being married to your neighbour sends your heart into overdrive.
That swoon-worthy laugh greets your ears with haste, Bucky’s eyes crinkled at the corners as his chest reverberates with its force. It’s impossible to bite back the grin that’s fighting its way onto your lips.
Small tendrils of chestnut hair tumble from behind his ears, begging to be pushed back, but the buzz from the wine has dulled and you can’t find the confidence to do it, no matter how much Bucky’s eyes are pleading you to.
“You know, it’s sweet of you to teach the boys how to play.” He looks at you in adoration, the image of you spending time with Sam’s nephews triggering a warmth to spread in his chest.
A breathy laugh escapes you as your gaze falls to the kitchen counter. You blush at the compliment and slowly start drying the dishes again.
“Do you spend much time with them?” You ask with a brief glance his way.
Bucky shrugs, “Yeah, Sarah is always throwing barbecues for the squad. They’re good kids, and I bet they’ll love you!”
“Oh God, I hope so. I’ve never taught before and i’m scared they’ll hate me and i’ll destroy their dreams and-” You ramble away without noticing the frown tugging at your neighbours brows.
“Teach me.”
Huh?
“What?” You freeze.
“You said you’ve never taught before,” Bucky steps closer to you, his cologne swarming around you like a warm hug, “so practise on me. Teach me something.”
You almost laugh at his words, mind immediately jumping to the conclusion that he’s joking. But Bucky doesn’t move, his blue eyes study your own, body so still that you fail to conjure a laugh. He’s not joking.
Hesitation is written across your features, drawing a single shake of Bucky’s head. “Come on, sweets. Please? For me?” He pleads.
“Okay.”
It’s scary how quickly you succumb to Bucky’s wishes; you fear you’d do awful things if only he asked and you’d even do it with a smile. You’re so doomed.
With a triumphant grin, Bucky plucks the dish cloth and plate from your grasp and carefully places them on the sink’s edge, before taking your hand in his and guiding you to your piano.
Nerves prickling beneath your skin, you trail behind him and silently revel in his touch. It’s hard to not stare at his perfect body as you stumble around furniture, the sharp muscles of his shoulders rippling as he tugs you with him. Flicking off the speaker on the way, you fall onto the small piano stool beside Bucky, and with such little room, your left thigh is pressed up against his. The solid curve of his muscles prod into your flesh and yet despite the fluttering it causes in your stomach, you’re far more focused on his hands.
From the bulge of his toned biceps to the trail of prominent veins in his forearms, your eyes drag down Bucky’s arms till you pause at the sight of his large hands. They lay spread across the span of his thighs, his right pinky finger mere atoms away from your exposed skin where your dress has ridden up. You find yourself craving the sparks that alight with his touch, so you adjust your position to make sure your leg brushes against his hand.
It certainly hasn’t gone amiss to the firefighter that you’ve taken a liking to his hands. Sure, he’s caught you staring at them before, but the hunger in your gaze right now is greater than ever.
The corner of Bucky’s lip turns up into a smirk as he reaches for your hands once more, lifting them to rest on the ivory keys of your piano.
“Wanna hear you play me something before you give me a lesson.” He admits, his words more of a demand than a question.
When you fail to respond, still caught up in scanning the crevices of his calloused hands, Bucky nudges your shoulder.
You shake your head with a dazed frown, “Huh?”
A playful chuckle falls from his pink lips, “I said play me something, sweets, before you start teachin’ me.”
You giggle sheepishly, sighing an ‘Oh’ before you gather your thoughts. Bucky returns his hands to his lap - a movement you struggle to ignore - giving you free rein of the instrument.
Running through some songs you could teach him, you settle for one of your favourites, or more accurately, one of Bucky’s favourites. The cool surface of the keys is harsh beneath your fingertips, a stark contrast to the Bucky-induced-heat flushing through your veins, hands stretching into place as you prepare the opening chords.
Rhythmic tones swarm around the two of you as you begin playing, masterfully dancing across the keys like it’s a second language. Your graceful motions always bring Bucky to a halt as you entrap him in your art.
He recognises the song straight away, lips turning up at the sweet melody. You didn’t even have to ask to know what he wanted to hear, you just knew. Bucky’s head feels light at the sight before him. A knowing grin has settled on your soft lips, your body ever so lightly swaying to the music, clearly getting lost the sounds.
It’s impossible not to feel the adoring stare of your neighbour, no matter how hard you try to ignore it. Warmth is pooling in the depths of your heart where it feels like you’re bleeding out, your love for Bucky forcing out the blood till the only thing circulating through your veins is him. No longer able to cope with the feelings swarming within you, your fingers abruptly stop mid song before you turn to look up at the firefighter.
“Okay, your go.” You state, but when Bucky raises a bemused brow your way, you continue to instruct him. “Come on. You’re gonna do the left hand, I’ll do the right.”
“Yes Ma’am!” Bucky chimes with a mock salute, earning him a glare.
It takes a few tries to move his fingers into the correct positions, both because he’s apparently wholeheartedly incapable of doing what you say but also because you may or may not zone out every time the veins of his hands stick out as he moves. But it’s still entirely his fault though. Entirely. ‘Maybe like 98% his fault. That’s seems fair.’ You think.
“There you go!” You cheer when the firefighter successfully plays the right notes in tandem.
“Would you look at that, not so useless after all.” Bucky winks at you and you blush lightly.
Glancing at him hopefully, you ask him to play the first chord you taught him.
“Oh, umm-“ He stutters, fingers flailing about and pressing random keys in search of the right pattern.
“Here, let me…” You chuckle sweetly at how utterly lost he looks and move to help him.
Leaning forward, you drag Bucky’s fingers over the ridges of ivorite, slowly placing them on the correct keys. You feel his lust-filled eyes trained on your face while you work, though it’s getting harder and harder to focus under his stare.
A frown tugs at your brows when your mind goes blank as to where Bucky needs to put his left hand, his still-wandering gaze burning into you and spreading to your cunt faster than you care to admit.
Of course, Bucky notices your breath quickening, chest stumbling up and down with shaky pants. His proximity is intoxicating and the will to fight it is slowly slipping past you, fingers itching to trace up Bucky’s thick arms to his neck so you can finally pull his lips to yours.
Bucky reads every inch of your skin like he’s studying for an exam. From the clench of your jaw to your eyes fluttering shut, he knows that he’s winning this tussle for control.
“Bucky…” You breathe, the wavering sigh rolling from your tongue like a stray secret.
“Yes, doll?” Bucky smirks with glinting eyes and you bite back a whimper.
Opening your eyes, you keep them trained on where yours rest on his. “I can’t focus with you looking at me like that.”
Bucky knows exactly what you mean but he can’t help but toy with you. “Like what?” He cocks his head with faux innocence that fools no one.
You turn to look up at the firefighter, eyes meeting his half lidded ones, the blue of his eyes barely visible behind his lust-blown pupils but the blue you can see is so impossible dark that you wonder if they were ever light in the first place.
Taking a breath, you wet your lips so briefly that Bucky nearly misses it. Nearly. “Like you want to kiss me.” You say, barely above a whisper.
“Oh,” Bucky sighs, leaning in closer, “I want to do much more than that.”
Your body is alight with need. Craving his touch, a breach of the barrier between you, you practically whine your reply. “Then why are you just staring?”
“Well, I wanna remember you like this; sweet, angelic, so perfect in your little sundress.“
With the back of his hand, Bucky nudges the hem of your dress higher till his whole hand is spread against your thigh. You quash the aching desire to glance at where your bodies meet and lock your eyes on Bucky’s, whose lips are turned into a knowing smirk.
“Gotta savour it while I can.” He says as he pushes his palm further to your inner thigh, his pinky finger mere inches from your heat.
“Why?” You ask, heart racing.
It dawns on you that you may actually pass out when the firefighter leans in close to you, nose pushing your hair aside to expose the soft skin of your neck which now sits defenceless to his advances. The heat of his breath is electrifying, lips nearing your pulse point eagerly.
Bucky’s lips ghost over your skin as he explains, “Cause once I’ve had my way with you, you’re gonna be a hot fucking mess, sweets.”
A breathy moan tumbles from the depths of you chest at the crude insinuations of his words; your eyes flutter shut, an unintentional reaction that you’re grateful for as it hides the way your pupils roll to the back of your head.
Through the dark span of your eyelids, you picture exactly how Bucky will make you a hot fucking mess. Spread legs with his tongue delving through your folds, back arched as he pounds into your pussy with vigour, his hands guiding your hips back to meet his as he fucks you from behind. The images bear too much for you yet you can’t stop picturing the salacious scenes, not when your neighbour is pressing open-mouthed kisses to the side of your neck.
“James…” You sigh, voice carrying the weight of a thousand pleas.
“Yeah? Is that what you want?”
Nodding your head desperately, you whine, unable to form any words beneath his sinful tongue.
“Words, doll.” Bucky says, lips hovering over your ear. He’s struggling to hold back but can’t let himself touch you the way he wants to until he hears you spell it out for him.
Turning your head slowly, you peer at Bucky with half-lidded eyes and a slack-jaw. “I want you, James. Please.”
That’s all it takes to disintegrate the final remnants of the firefighter’s self-control before his full lips meet your own with a hunger that’s been brewing for months.
Bucky’s lips glide across yours, slotting between your own so easily it’s got you believing this is not your first kiss. It’s soft and sweet but so goddamn sensual that you can’t help but moan into his mouth, the now open gap giving him the perfect chance to slide his tongue inside.
You bring your hands up Bucky’s body and rest them on his neck, fingers tentatively feeding through the hair at the nape of his neck while you jostle for control of the kiss.
Forced to pull back for breath, you take a peek only to find those strikingly blue eyes already on yours.
“Fuck, doll,” Bucky whispers, “you don’t know how long I’ve been waitin’ for this.”
“Probably not as long as I have.” You scoff.
“Then let me make up for lost time.”
“Wait, what do y-“
Within moments, Bucky is lifting your legs over the bench and is knelt between them, his large hands teasing the hem of your dress as he keeps your thighs spread apart.
Your mouth is agape with surprise while you grab onto the piano behind you for stability, a mixture of nerves and anticipation coursing through your veins. And as if he can read your anxious thoughts, Bucky looks up at you with the most sincere expression across his soft features.
“Do you want me to stop?” He asks, despite the deep desire shining in his eyes. He wants you more than anything, but he needs to know you want him too.
It’s an easy answer and you’re shaking your head faster than you care to admit, but the memory of Bucky’s prior words flash through your mind and you still just as quick.
“No.”
Watching intently as he runs a hand from your ankle up to your knee, the firefighter rolls his bottom lip between his teeth when your breath hitches.
“Then promise me you’ll tell me if that changes?” Bucky asks.
You reach down and run your fingers through his chestnut locks, tucking the few loose strands behind his ear.
“I promise.”
“You’re gonna be the death of me, sweets.”
A hearty laugh reverberates through you, but you’re quickly silenced by Bucky’s lips on your inner thigh, eyes fluttering shut at the feeling. He kisses his way up to your heat, slowly pushing your dress higher and higher till the only thing between you and his mouth is the crimson lace panties covering your mound.
A sound you can only describe as a growl ripples through the room and you glance down at your neighbour to find him practically drooling at the sight of you. But then his eyes are on yours, his hungry, half-lidded eyes, and he’s tracing a finger over your clothed slit. Your breathing becomes laboured at his touch, your body, your mind, all of you at his mercy.
“Bucky, please…”
“Ah ah ah-“ The firefighter tuts, “-since when do you call me Bucky?”
You frown, back arching slightly in search of some friction on your core, too aroused to process his words properly.
“Look at me, Y/n.”
The stern nature of his tone lures your eyes to his once more. “What?” You ask, confused.
“I haven’t spent months goin’ crazy listening to you use my name only to have you call me Bucky when I’m finally between your legs.”
The throb of your pussy spurs you on and you tilt your head teasingly. “Touch me, James.” You say, and he obeys.
Bucky glides his hands up to your hips and drags your panties lower and lower, his lips chasing the lace till there’s no where left to kiss but your slick folds.
He hovers over your heat with bated breath before forcing himself to close his eyes and ask if you’re still okay with this.
“More than okay, James.” You answer truthfully.
“Good, cause I’m fucking starvin’.”
You feel his mouth on your pussy before you’ve even processed his words, tongue delving between your folds like he really is starving and you didn’t just feed him the best dinner he’s had in years. Though something tells him that title is about to be beaten the second you cum all over his face.
Your mouth curves into an ‘o’, the most pornographic of moans escaping you at the sinful sounds of Bucky’s mouth on your cunt. Drowning in increasingly intense waves of pleasure, your senses are dialled up to the max; with every flick of his tongue and suck on your clit, you find yourself falling deeper in your arousal. It becomes impossible to listen to anything Bucky’s telling you.
“Y’taste so sweet, doll.”
“Doing so good for me, aren’t ya? My good girl.”
“Let me hear you, doll, need to hear how good you feel.”
Whether it’s praises or orders, there’s no chance in hell of you understanding a word that falls from his lips, though Bucky doesn’t mind. The clench of your soft thighs around his head tells him all he needs to know - that even if your heads not fulling comprehending him, your body is. And the sheer amount of slick glistening across your cunt is enough for him to know that you’re ready for more.
The sensation of Bucky’s finger tracing along your pussy lips sends your eyes rolling to the back of your head and your hips lifting off the stool.
“James- oh fuck-“
Words die on your tongue when Bucky eases a finger inside you. White hot pleasure builds at your core, burning the last remnants of your self control, its embers coaxing a near-scream out of you.
“Fuck, that’s it, sweets. That’s- shit you’re so tight, pussy’s squeezing me and it’s just one finger.”
You mewl and squirm beneath him.
“How you gonna handle two of ‘em, doll?”
Bucky’s mesmerised at the sight of his finger gliding in and out of you, drenched in your sweet juices, too beautiful of a sight for him to give up by eating you out. But when you groan at the suggestion of two fingers, he drags his gaze upwards and is greeted with a view that’s evening better.
You, draped against the piano, head tilted back and brows drawn together while uneven sighs tumble from your swollen lips. God, you look heavenly, Bucky thinks. He doesn’t realise he’s said it out loud, but it makes little difference seeing as you’re rather preoccupied with the thought of Bucky fucking another finger inside you.
“James?” You call, reaching down to cover your left hand around the one at your sex, the other tugging on his hair.
“Yeah? Are you alright? Do you want me to stop?” He panics, thinking you’ve grabbed his hand to stop him.
Instead, you look him in the eye and say “Are you gunna fuck another finger inside of me or what?”
An awe-inspired grin spreads across Bucky’s face at your question. He keeps his blue orbs on yours while he presses a kiss to your clit and pushes himself higher till he’s inches from your face.
He rests a hand against the piano, caging you in and says, “Anything for my girl.” before a second digit joins his first.
The stretch knocks the wind out of your chest but Bucky hardly gives you any time to adjust, his fingers pumping in and out of you even faster than before. His palm slaps against your bundle of nerves with every thrust, the force riding to your chest where your tits bounce in rhythm.
“So damn beautiful…” The firefighter says.
You look up at him through your lashes and pull his lips to yours, tasting yourself on his tongue. With clashing teeth, the wet slapping sounds only feeds into the moment and Bucky’s suddenly very aware of the tightness in his jeans.
With each passing second, the cord in your stomach is getting so close to snapping that your mouth isn’t even moving against Bucky’s anymore.
“Fuck, James, I’m- I-“
“Shh, I know.” He presses a kiss to your forehead. “You gonna cum all over my fingers, doll? Gonna let me see you fall apart?”
You nod feverishly.
“Good girl, now let go for me.”
That’s all it takes for the damn to break loose and the fiercest orgasm of your life to rack through your body. It reaches every part of you, all the cracks and crevices you never thought could be touched, yet here you are, feeling every inch of yourself set on fire.
“That’s it, doll, that’s it.” Bucky comforts you while you lay victim to the aftershocks of his work, slowing the thrust of his fingers till your breathing evens and he moves to gently circling your sensitive clit.
“Holy shit…” You sigh, a satisfied and totally fucked-out grin playing across your lips.
Noticing how your hazy your eyes still are, Bucky smiles to himself while pressing loving kisses on your forehead.
“You did real good for me, sweetheart.” He listens to you hum beneath him as he moves to kiss your temple. “Y’look so pretty when you cum, you know that? Even prettier than I imagined.”
You twist in your seat to face your neighbour. “You’ve imagined this too?”
“Every night, doll.”
“Huh…”
Though Bucky’s eyes remain fixed on yours, it’s obvious that his mind has slipped away; he’s now clouded by memories of his x-rated dreams, ones that have ended with him pumping his embarrassingly hard length into his fist one too many times, and his cock twitches in his ever-tightening pants. You notice the movement at his crotch and, emboldened by his confession and the best orgasm you’ve ever had, you decide to take back some control.
“What have you pictured doing to me, James?” Your tone is so sweet, so innocent, that it takes a moment for your words to register in his brain. But when it does, boy, does a fresh wave of blood rush to his cock.
“You sure you wanna know? Cuz it ain’t all sweet and innocent.” He warns.
You say nothing and let your actions do all the talking; you slide a hand down to meet his left, the one still nestled between your sticky thighs, and tug it away from your cunt. With your eyes locked on his, you raise Bucky’s cum coated fingers to your mouth, slowly wrapping your lips around them and sucking your sweetness away. Making sure to give the firefighter a show, you swirl your tongue around his fingers before taking them as deep as you can, a knowing look in your eyes when you notice Bucky clenching his jaw.
After releasing his fingers from your swollen red lips, you press a kiss to the palm of his hand. “Tell me.”
What you can only describe as a growl rises from the back of Bucky’s throat and before you know it, you’re being carried to your bedroom, legs bound tightly around his waist while your arms wrap loosely around his neck.
He sits down on the edge of the bed; hands resting on your hips and edging lower to your ass, his fingers grip the supple flesh to keep you in place.
His force on your hips is pushing you down on his ample bulge, sparking a flash of pleasure straight up your spine that escapes you with a moan. Bucky chuckles softly with a sinful grin as you tilt your head back at the feeling.
“You wanna know what I’ve imagined us doing, doll?” The firefighter grabs your chin to bring your attention back to him. He runs the pad of his thumb over your bottom lip, tugging on it and letting it bounce back into place.
“I’ve pictured us just like this.” He drops his hand to your neck, tracing the curve of your collar bone till it meets the strap of your sundress. “You, naked and beautiful as ever, riding my cock like I know you can.”
You gasp lightly when he tugs your strap till it’s tumbling off your shoulder.
“And you’re telling me just how full you are, how stretched your little pussy is around me, choking my cock like a damn vice.”
Bucky’s filthy words send your hips into motion without warning; you grind your bare cunt over his crotch, the tent in his pants settling between your slick folds till his shaft is enveloped with your warmth.
“Does that sound good, doll? To have my cock buried inside you when you bounce on it? Fuck, I bet your cunt is dripping for me again,”
“It never stopped, James.” You whimper, your sensitive clit sending jolts up your frame as Bucky guides your hips over his.
“That’s right, you’re never gonna use anything else to cum ever again. You got me now, doll. I’m all you need. Me, my cock, I’m gonna ruin everyone else for you.”
You don’t even notice that Bucky’s hands are on the zip at your back, slowly pulling it down till the fabric are your chest goes slack, and with the straps already draped over your shoulders, the flowing material cascades around you, tumbling to your hips and leaving you defenseless to Bucky’s insatiable blue eyes.
“Fuck me, sweets, you’re- god- you’re perfect.” He leans in and kisses your collarbone. “So,” kiss, “So,” kiss, “perfect.”
Your eyes flutter shut, lost in the feeling of his touch, and Bucky smirks when he sees you. He teases a hand up your soft skin till it sits just beneath your tit, daring to reach up and play with you in the ways he’s always dreamt of.
“Is this okay?” He asks, earning an even more passionate grind of your hips as you push your chest closer to his open mouth.
He chuckles, “Needy, aren’t ya, sweets?”
You whine.
“Hmm, lucky for you, this is exactly what I imagined doing to you, what I’ve dreamt of for months…”
His lips wrap around your hardened nipple with haste, the warmth of his mouth a welcome sensation. He sucks at the sensitive nub, this tongue reaching out to soothe you afterwards. You throw your head back and moan loudly.
The sound of bucky loudly licking and sucking on your tits is driving you crazy, to the point where your hips are stuttering over his, practically drowning in the feeling till you have no control over your movements.
“God, I love your tits. Wanna act out every dream I’ve ever had of you. Fucking your tits, your throat, your cunt, anywhere you’ll let me, doll, please. I’ve needed you for so long.”
You blush at the word love, surpressing the hope that is stirring at the possibility that your tits aren’t the only thing he loves. Has he really wanted this as long as me? You wonder, picturing everything he just revealed he’s been wanting.
“M’So fuckin’ hard for you sweetheart, I know you can feel me. Dick’s throbbing, doll, it’s s’hard it hurts.”
You pull at his hair so he’s looking up at you again and capture his lips in yours.
“I wanna see you, Bucky…”
He groans and reaches for the hem of his shirt which he waists no time in tearing off. Your chest rises and falls heavier than before, eyes raking his physique just like you had that night he was leaving the shower at his place.
You trail a finger down his abs till it brushes the button of his jeans teasingly.
“All of you, James.” You look pointedly at his crotch. “May I?” You ask and when he nods, you climb off his lap and sink between his legs on the floor, you dress tumbling to the ground immediately.
Bucky’s abs tense as you work to undo the button, your hands tiny in comparison to his body. Next, you work the zipper up and over the bulge of his cock, the teeth desperate to come apart after being so constricted for so long. The two sides of denim snap away from the tent of his boxers, perfectly presenting where the firefighter so badly needs your touch.
He helps you kick off his jeans till the only thing between you is his boxers. You trace a finger up and down his shaft through the cotton, enjoying the sticky patch of pre cum leaking through the top.
“Have you ever imagined me sucking your cock, James?” You ask with half lidded eyes before kissing his covered shaft. “Cause I have.”
Bucky whimpers - whimpers - at your words, his hips snapping up to your face uncontrollably.
You begin to drag down his boxers, trailing kisses down down down, your lips greeting his tip when his cock flicks up against them before your eyes even get chance to glance at him.
Your eyes flutter shut at the salty taste on your lips, revelling in the breathy moans from your neighbour.
“Fuck- pl-please honey, I need your- argh- mouth around me!”
You make eye contact with him from your place on the floor and ask if he’s sure.
“More than anything.”
And with that, you take his thick length into your mouth, lips sealing around his angry pink cock head briefly when your trace your tongue over his slit, before gliding lower down his cock.
You take as much of him as you can, but you need time to warm up having never taken a cock as large as his before.
“You’re so big, baby.” You say as you pull off his shaft with a pop, “Biggest I’ve ever had in my mouth.”
A frustrated groan arises from the firefighter and you feel his hand on the back of your head, gently pushing you to his dick once more.
“Suck my cock, doll, just like we’ve both imagined, nice and deep, please.”
You take the base of his cock in your hands and guide his tip back to your lips.
“Atta girl,” Bucky encourages as you take him deeper and deeper.
He feels you relaxing your throat to take more of him and his balls clench at the feeling.
“Argh fuck, fuck, fuck. Good girl, oh my god, yes!”
His praises and curses cheer you on and you manage as much of him as you can, only an inch or so remaining that’s simply too thick to fit in your mouth. Lord knows how he���ll fit in your pussy, but you’re sure he’ll figure it out.
You bob your head on his length over and over till you’re in desperate need of air. You let your hands work your spit and his precum up and down his hard cock while you catch your breath and watch his beautiful face contort into one of extreme pleasure.
Your chest fills with pride at Bucky’s facial expressions; making him feel good is somehow more rewarding than anything you’ve done in your life and you find yourself content at the thought of spending the rest of your days pleasing him.
Bucky is oblivious to the gratified smile toying your lips and wholly unprepared for your next movement.
“Oh god- oh fuck, doll-” He groans, his breathing staggered and eyes clenched shut when you take his balls in your mouth, the skin sloppily wet from your work on his cock, and now enjoying the warmth of your mouth.
“Oh honey, do that again, felt so go- argh!” He’s interrupted by you tending to his sack once more, your tongue swirling around them and lightly sucking.
You moan around his pretty, swollen balls, the vibrations drawing a sigh of pleasure from your neighbour. The trimmed hair at the base of Bucky’s member is tickling your nose while you fight to taste every part of him.
With a final sharp suck, you release his balls with a small plop, plant a wet kiss on each and flatten you tongue to lick a bold stripe up his length. The tip of your muscle presses into the vein on the underside of his dick and Bucky thrusts upward, his hips bucking as he desperately searches for more.
As you ready yourself to glide his cock down your throat once more, you feel Bucky’s hand on your cheek, pulling you off him.
“What’s wrong? Did I do something?” You ask with a concerned frown, nervous that you’ve done something wrong to have Bucky stopping you. You wrap your hand around his forearm, the one outstretched to hold your hair, while the other remains enclosed around his cock.
“Nothin’ bad, sweets, it’s just that- fuck-“
You absentmindedly stroke your thumb over his girth, a motion you intend to be comforting but in reality, it just makes him throb even harder in your hands.
“-I’m not gonna last much longer if you keep using your pretty mouth like that.”
“And that’s a problem because…?”
He laughs lightly and tucks your hair behind your ear. “Cause as hot as you’d look swallowing my load, I’d much rather cum inside that sweet pussy for our first time.”
You roll your bottom lip between your teeth before pecking a doting kiss to his forearm and letting Bucky pull you to your feet. His eyes follow yours till he’s looking up at you from his seated position, his hands falling to your hips with an awestruck face.
“What the hell did I do to deserve you?” His voice is barely above a whisper. You blush crimson.
“Get on the bed, doll.” He orders. “Lay on your back.”
You do as he says and once you’ve settled, he crawls on top of you. It’s quiet for a moment as Bucky stares lovingly down at you, burning the image into his memory to remind him he has everything he needs.
“I should have found the guts to do this months ago…” You murmur, pushing the fallen tendrils of chestnut hair behind his ear. He looks so goddamn perfect; the golden glow filtering through your window catching every feature you’ve spent so long dreaming about, and now he’s here, really here, and you can’t help but stroke his cheek with revere.
“We have now, doll. That’s enough for me.” Bucky whispers. “Are you comfortable?”
You nod, truthfully, both in terms of your position but also for what’s coming. But then his elbows bend out and he’s lowering himself onto you.
“How about now?”
There’s a gleam in his eye and a playful smirk on his lips as he watches your chest heave, your body taking more of his weight now.
“No!” You giggle.
“No? Is this better?” Bucky teases, briefly laying his whole weight over you until you paw at his shoulders to push him off.
“James! You’re squishing me!”
The melody of your carefree laughter has Bucky melting and he pushes himself up onto his hands once more. His lip is tucked between his teeth, enjoying the view as he becomes increasingly aware of his cock now just one slip away from your pussy lips.
Quickly coming to your own awareness of Bucky’s rock hard length pressing into you, you sober up.
“Darling?” You tug on his bottom lip with the pad of your thumb.
Bucky’s brows pinch closer slightly.
“I need you inside me.”
His soft lips are crashing against yours within moments, his hand fighting between the nonexistent space between your bare bodies to grasp his cock and guide his tip to your bundle of nerves.
The sudden taste of how good Bucky can make you feel forces a sharp breath from you. It’s so much yet not enough, all at the same time.
“Tell me if you need me to stop, okay? Let me take care of you how you deserve.”
After a meek nod with your hands finding refuge in Bucky’s soft locks, he trails his cock head down your pink folds till it catches on the dip of your entrance.
Bucky tempts a whimper from you as he slides inside of you, your walls stretching to accommodate his larger than average member.
“Fuck, doll, you’re so tight for me.” The firefighter moans, resisting the urge to snap his hips and bottom out completely.
You’ve yet to make a sound, the sting in your pussy not yet dissipating, and when you glance down at where your bodies meet, you realise you’re barely taking half of him.
“Hey, hey, it’s okay,” Bucky’s reassuring voice is ghosting over your ear, “you’re taking me so well, sweets. You need me to go slower?”
You clench your eyes shut briefly, “No, keep going, you’re just so…”
“So what?”
Bucky watches a deep red creep up your neck before returning his gaze to your eyes, that now dance across the room avoiding him.
A gentle grasp on your chin draws you to face the breathtaking man above you and you clench around his dick.
“What happened to the little minx who was practically beggin’ me to fuck her, huh? Don’t get all shy on me now, dollface. I’m so what?”
His words have you spilling yours without second thought. “You’re so fucking thick, James, cock’s splittin’ me in half.”
He groans and snaps his hips fully into yours, making you scream out, “Jamie!!!”
His scalp burns when you pull on his hair harder than before, your moans filling the room like a broken record. Bucky should be focused on the furrow of your brow, your laboured breaths, the way your cunt is choking him, anything about how perfect this feels, but all he can focus on is how with one thrust, you called him ‘Jamie’. And you didn’t just say it, you screamed it.
“Shit, honey, say it again.”
“Ja-Jamie…” You whine and feel Bucky draw his hips back before pounding into you once more.
“Again.” Your neighbour growls.
“Oh my god, fuck- I”
“Again.”
It takes everything you have to open your eyes and look at him. “Fuck me, Jamie.”
“That’s my girl.”
Bucky drives his length into you till his tip is hitting your cervix, the pleasure wrapping around your throat and squeezing the air out of you. You fight to breathe as Bucky drills into you, over and over, softly grunting with every thrust.
“Never felt anything as good as your cunt before, doll. Wanna spend the rest of my life buried inside you.”
You pull his lips to yours and, back arching from the mattress, dive your tongue into his mouth with vigour. He lets you explore his mouth while fucking you deep and fast, the headboard of your bed slamming against the wall and probably driving your neighbour crazy. Oh wait, he is your neighbour, and it is driving him crazy, but in the best way imaginable.
“So goddamn tight, sweets, y’pussy was made for me,” He swallows your whimpers happily, “don’t you think? You feel how good i’m filling you up, honey? Sliding in an’ out so easy, you’re so fucking wet for my dick.”
“Harder, Jamie.”
Goddamn.
“Keep calling me that and I’ll do whatever you want.”
You lose yourself in his thrusts; the sting has long turned into the most pleasure you’ve ever felt, and that’s saying something after the orgasm he lulled from you only a few minutes ago.
“Fuckin’ me s-so good, Jamie.”
“Ah- just like that, baby.”
“I’m getting close, James, need you to go faster.”
Your pleas send Bucky’s cock pulsing and he does exactly as you wish. He fucks you faster, fighting off the desperate urge to cum inside your sweet cunt.
“Jamie…” You sigh.
He grins up at you from his place at your tits, his tongue reaching out to tease your nipples. You push his head down till he takes your sensitive bud in his mouth, sucking and swirling his tongue over it while he gropes its twin.
The tight coil in your stomach is twisting to its limit and you find yourself dangerously close to cumming around Bucky’s hard, thick length.
“I’m so- oh fuck- i’m so close, James.”
He lifts his head and eyes you with lust blown pupils.
“Are you gonna cum for me, doll? God, I can feel you clenching around me, you wanna cream all over my cock? Huh?” He smirks at your pornographic moans. “Bet I’ll look so good covered in your cum, sweets, maybe I’ll let you clean me up, put that mouth to good use.”
“I’m gonna cum, i’m gonna cum,” You chant several times breathlessly.
“Let go for me, sweet girl, make a mess o’my cock. Cum, doll.”
Your body shudders as your hips grind up into Bucky’s, your walls tightening before he feels you gush around him. Practically screaming in pleasure, you bite down on Bucky’s shoulder to quiet yourself, though the pain travels straight to his member, still fucking into you with force.
“Fuck, James, you’re so perfect, never came so hard in my life- shit-“
He’s groaning into your ear, his balls slamming against you and filling the room with salacious wet slaps.
“You’re so wet and- fuck- I can’t- I can’t hold back much longer.”
You tug on the hair at the nape of his neck and lick up the side of his throat, tongue catching the salty beads of sweat in its path. Reaching his earlobe, you suck on it lightly and whisper into his ear.
“Want you to cum inside me, Jamie. Fill me up, please, I need your cum.”
“Argh, fuck!!” Your words send Bucky over the edge and his hips stutter while he finally lets go.
“Oh god, yes!” Bucky grunts. “Take my cum, doll, fuckin’ take it.”
Your tongue seeks his neck once more, pressing open mouthed kisses as his cock shoots streams of white seed into you, the spurts seemingly never ending.
“Fillin’ my cunt so much, Jamie- fuck- you feel so good!”
As his cock softens, his thrusts slow to a more bearable pace, both of you so sensitive from your orgasms. Catching your breath takes a minute or two, but in the meantime, you coax satisfied sighs from your firefighter by running your hands up and down his back; the light sheen of sweat greets your fingertips as you touch him tenderly.
With no words being shared, you focus solely on Bucky’s breathing, the rise and fall of his back beneath your hands and the weight of his body on yours. It should be uncomfortable, but you’ve never felt so at home in a place, let alone with a person, in your life.
“That was…” Bucky murmurs into your neck.
You finish his sentence, “Pretty damn good.” Laughter ripples through the muscles of his back.
“Yeah,” He agrees and pulls back slightly to look at you, “you feeling okay?”
“If by okay you mean ‘completely and utterly fucked out’ then yeah, I’m great.”
You grin cheekily before pushing his hair behind his ear yet again, an act you find yourself praying that you’ll get to do for the rest of your life.
“How are you feeling?” You ask sincerely.
Those blue orbs flick between your own, laced with an emotion you hope to be love. “Like I want to be with you like this forever.” Bucky admits. “That and completely and utterly fucked out.”
You laugh heartily, bringing a beaming smile to Bucky’s swollen red lips.
“Let me clean you up, doll.” He offers before pushing himself off you, much to your dismay. He disappears to your bathroom for a minute before returning with a damp cloth in hand.
“Can you spread your legs for me, sweets?”
He bites a chuckle at how quickly you obey him and gets to work, wiping away your shared cum from your pussy and goosebump-ridden thighs. The towel is warm and soft on your skin, lulling you to sleep, though you fight to keep your eyes on your neighbour.
“You’re so beautiful, James.” You say, reaching to place your hand on his that sits beside you hip, where he’s leaning his weight.
He smiles sheepishly and focuses on the job at hand. Once you’re clean, Bucky carries you to the bathroom so you can do your business, waiting patiently outside after putting his boxers back on and grabbing his henley for you to wear.
When you step out of the bathroom, Bucky’s holding his he let out in front of you. “You looked a bit cold so I thought you might want a shirt?”
You smile, “Your shirt?”
“Yeah…” He rubs the back of his neck, muscles flexing at the movement, “You don’t have to, I just thou-“
He stops talking when you pull the henley from his grasp and tug it over your head. It swallows you whole and the sleeves tumble past your hands, but Bucky thinks it’s perfect. You’re perfect.
Grabbing his hand, you pull him back to your room and back into bed, tugging the sheets over you both where you nestle into his chest.
“You’re staying, right?” You ask with the most puppy-dog eyes you can muster.
“Of course, doll.”
Smiling to yourself, you curl up against the firefighter. “Woulda cooked you a meal months ago if I knew that’s all it took for you to finally fuck me.”
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a/n: filth. pure filth. so sorry that it took me a lifetime to post this - life got lifey and it took me ages to get this right. it’s my second time writing any sort of smut so i hope it was good for y’all. thanks for all the support, it means the world to me. love you guys, red ❤️
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