#“We can still be friends but I still judge you and your poor taste”

[espressoristretto-patronum]

This is how Tori (and I) looks at you when you put pineapple on your pizza

[sleepyangelkami]

NS//FW ALPHABET e.williams

 ☆ WORD COUNT - 5.5K

ELLIE WILLIAMS X FEM!READER

 ☆ WARNINGS - smut, nsf//w themes, much much more but unfortunately i will not be typing them all out because this entire post is around sexual themes, read at your own risk ! intended lower case, nothing i write is ever proofread 🩷

AFTERCARE, what they're like after sex as soon as ellie's strap is out of your hole, she turns to the sweetest girl ever. not that she wasn't sweet before but sometimes she can be a little rough or degrading but she makes sure to completely flip that straight away. as soon as she has the harness off, she's cooing, praising you for doing such a good job. "did such a good job f'me, sweet girl." and immediately she's gathering you in her arms, peppering kisses all over your hairline. "think you're okay to go for a bath?" because sometimes, you're just too tired to. now, it's not as if she's about to judge you for this but she merely bathes you after because she knows you don't like the sticky, uncomfortable feeling afterwards between cum and sweat. she "good girl, doin' so well." she'll praise as she washes down your entire body for you. after sex, ellie's only priority is you and making sure that you go to sleep feeling good. usually, you're in a fresh set of jammies, hair still sort of wet while your backside is cuddled into her front. 

BODY PART, her favourite body part of hers and also yours ellie quite likes her thighs. they're perfect for you, practically made for you. she loves having you sit in her lap, babbling on or getting fucked deep with her strap. she loves having you sit on her thighs like a little lapdog, or rubbing yourself off one, whining and huffing, waiting for her to do something to help. or perhaps she loves the way your head sits between them, looking all fucked out and doe-eyed at her as her hand is woven through your hair, stuffing your face back between them to eat at her cunt. ellie's favourite part of you is your hip/stomach area. she loves holding onto it, digging her fingers and bunt nails into your hips as she fucks you so deep with her strap, you clawing at her back and whining and moaning into her shoulder. she also likes tracing up and down your stomach to tease you, pressing little kisses in a row from your tits to your crotch before she tastes you, just letting you get impossibly more wet before she puts her hands and mouth exactly where you need her.

CUM, anything to do with cum really ellie's a creamerrrr!!! we all also are hyper aware of the breeding kink that this girl definitely has. she talks about her strap as if it's the real thing, pumping it into you, so pussy drunk she hasn't a notion of what words her mouth is spilling. "g'na fuck a baby into you, yeah? you want that, hm?" grunting and moaning as she shoves the strap right back into your hole, cooing at the way it swallows her whole. "fuck, jus' like that, mhm, gonna make you a mama." mumbling all these promises and swears that she has no intentions of keeping but in the moment, she'd want nothing more than to watch her own cum stringing through yours which is why she loves scissoring you too, her pussy planted on yours and listening to the wet squelches, it drives her crazy. the feeling of your cum (after your like third orgasm) melting into her own wetness. she can't control herself. she jus' wants to mix your guys' juices together 'n hump the shit out of you.

DIRTY SECRET, a dirty secret of hers bless ellie and her poor loser self. of course, ellie was the more dominant between you two, always ready to top you but before you'd gotten together, she had a dirty secret she'd hidden from you. you two had been close friends and sometimes you just drove her insane. not in an annoying way but more in a i-need-to-shove-my-hand-down-my-pants way. often times, she rubbed herself out to you. all she'd have to do is trail her hand down her boxers and suddenly her mind was on you, she couldn't even help it. she'd rub little circles around her puffy clit, your name muffled through her pillow. or in the modern!verse she'd be on her phone or even her laptop, a photo of you splayed out on the screen as she bit back her moans, her hand deep inside her, imagining it was your squelchy walls she was fucking into. "fuck me, y/n, jus' like that." even though you weren't doing anything. one time, you'd both been on the phone. it was late at night, your head resting against your pillow and your voice sounded so... raspy? it was all tired and babyish, you didn't even know what you were mumbling on about but ellie didn't much care for what you were saying anymore, too busy seeing stars as her fingers touched herself beneath the blanket. "els, you listening?" you'd mumble after not hearing much of a response in the past couple of minutes. "mhm." her broken hum. "jus' keep talkin', angel." and you would, innocently enough, not a clue in your mind of what the girl was doing on the other side of the phone.

EXPERIENCE, how experienced is she? does she know what she's doing? ellie knows exactly what she's doing for one of two reasons! if we're talking modern!verse, this girl has gotten around the entire college. every girl there knew ellie william's name along with a name of someone who she'd been with to match it. she wouldn't have shame either, if someone asked, they'd receive a vague but honest answer. but if we're talking tlou!verse, she knows things a different way. she'd seen some playboy magazine when she was on a run with dina, dina had showed it to her while laughing, thinking it was probably the funniest thing she'd ever found when on a patrol. but ellie could only flush at it, calling her weird before fishing around with other things. when dina wasn't looking, she slipped the thing into her bag. and then she began learning more and more and more. then she was on a run with you, ignoring the way you walked around all ditzy, almost knocking into something while she slipped porn tapes into her bag. best thing about going on patrol with you? she could take whatever she wanted whenever she pleased and didn't have to worry about you ratting on her. she didn't worry about you being a snitch partly because she trusted you but otherwise because she knew you were too distracted with your own loud mind to notice the suspicious things she was doing behind your back. so naive.

FAVOURITE POSITION, self explanatory it's no secret that ellie likes to toss you around the place. it's almost always like a game of chance with her, you just never know what you're going to get. one minute, she could have you in missionary, the next, you're sitting on her lap, bouncing to release any energy before bed or the next your face is smushed into the mattress. i feel as though she'd like this one a lot. she likes when your face is deep into the mattress, your ass hitting her crotch as she repeatedly fucks into you without any shame. ellie likes this because she feels like she has some sort of power over you and uses it to her advantage. "such a pretty slut, huh?" though her tone is all high pitched and slightly whiny, she couldn't help it, you just felt so good. she likes you in any position that she can bend you in half if she wants to and she wants you to know that she holds this power, not to be scared by it but she thinks a little intimidation isn't any harm.

GOOFY, is she humorous in the moment? does she make jokes? ellie makes a couple jokes here and there but nothing too significant. i think the only time that ellie would truly laugh at you is when she's in the middle of humiliating you. and even then, she does it only because she knows you like it. she'd never laugh at you in a way that would make you feel insecure but she can't help but chuckle against your collarbone when she mutters things about you being a pathetic whore for her, you only moaning response. afterwards, though, is a whole different story. she has a tendency of making fun of you afterwards as a little joke or when you joke around saying you don't like her or whatnot, she always finds a way to bring your previous nights events into the conversation, sometimes in front of jesse or dina who, at this stage, are used to ellie's antics. one time, you and ellie had been in bed afterwards and you'd made a joke saying that she didn't know what she was doing to which she started mimicking your moan. "oh, ellie! ellie! please lemme cum!" "shut up, ellie!" slapping her arm and trying to pretend that you weren't turning flush at the fact that you had said everything she had, much more.

HAIR, how is she groomed? does the carpet match the drapes? ellie shaves but i don't think she'd do it regularly. if anything, she trims. she often has hair on her pubic bone or around that area but with that being said she isn't big on shaving the rest of her body either. body hair never bothered ellie so she doesn't really care for it. it never bothered her on her arms or legs so she supposed it being down there didn't really bother her either. she also doesn't mind how or when you shave. if you want to be completely bald, be her guest, if you want a bush, go you! she really doesn't care. as i said before, hair really isn't a big deal to ellie.

INTIMACY, how is she in the moment through romantic aspect? as stated before, ellie can be a bit of a goof. but other than that she can be romantic. ellie sort of switches everything around, she's never truly the same. one day, she could have a candle or a bubble bath, on valentines she may even have rose petals. other times, you could both be clad in most your clothes and trying to contain your whimpers in a dark alleyway. sometimes, she can be awfully romantic, almost poetic even. other times she completely and utterly violates you for both your guys' enjoyment. with ellie, it's like opening a surprise easter egg. but if you'd asked her to be 'slow' through your muffled moans, she'd sort of get the hint. then, everything would turn a little romantic. she wants to make sure you're comfortable with whatever she's doing, always. and if you don't feel like being rough one night, that's okay, or if you feel that the romance is too much, that's okay too. she's your at your service, no matter what it is you're feeling on that particular day or night.

JACK OFF, anything to do with masturbation as said before, ellie was a HUGE jack off before you guys got together. it seemed like everything you did would lead her hand down her own pants, getting herself off at the thought of you. but now that you two are together, she's calmed down a whole lot. well, to a certain extent. now, she doesn't feel the need to rub one out if she gets horny, she merely shoves you against a wall and put her hands down your pants. ellie doesn't masturbate often but when she does, you're there. whether it's her mouth on your cunt and she just can't help herself, sticking a hand down her boxers and getting herself off while her tongue works on you or whether she's forcing you to watch, all whiny and subby, begging her to let you touched her or yourself, but she doesn't, of course. so unfair :(

KINK, a kink of hers overstimulation is ellie's guilty pleasure when it comes to you. she loves loves loves the way you writhe beneath her, after your fourth orgasm already, too fucked out to say anything. she has her hands on you at all times, never slowing her pace even when your back is arched and your eyes are filled with tears. "shh, baby, you can take it." pumping her fingers or her strap back into you. "take it, angel, jus' like that." all sweet as you get so fucked out so quickly. she loves having you where you can't even utter a sentence, the only word falling from your lips is her name and it sounds like a prayer. you can't stop your fucked out babbles or your whines against her. she loves having you at her fingertips, ready to mold like putty. and she'll tease you for it too. "hm? i don' know what you're saying, pretty girl." pressing kisses to your body as you try get the words out only to be cut off by whimpers. but she's having the time of her life, knowing you're close to getting your words out and shoving her fingers back into you. "huh? tell me what you want, sweet girl, use your words." knowing that you cant. she gets so pussy drunk off the thought of you coming over and over, it seems as though she's never done with you. "can you give me another? mm, good girl, i knew you could." because she's also a slut for praising you. something about the way your back arches when she calls you her good girl.

LOCATION, where is her favourite place to do it no location is off limits to this girl. once she has you alone, she doesn't care, she's taking you. she always makes sure to coax you, making sure you're all relaxed and comfortable especially if it's not in your guys' shared bed. one time, she had her fingers inside you while you were laying across dina and jesse's couch, the couple upstairs doing god only knew what. another time, she had you inside the bathroom of your parent's house while they waited for you both to rejoin them for dinner. she was like an animal. ellie really doesn't care for where you guys do it as long as you're somewhat comfortable. what she wouldn't want, is you doing something that you didn't want to. don't get me wrong, of course the bathroom wasn't a comfortable place to do it but you needed ellie then and there as much as she did so you let her hand sneak up your skirt. but, as always, there truly is no place like home, she loves having you on your guy's bed, sheets all messy and dirty as you make a big mess on them. this way, she doesn't have to worry about anyone hearing you both or walking in or even making that big mess that she loved you making.

MOTIVATION, what turns her on and gets her going your teasing. although, she's sure that half the time you don't even mean to tease her, it just happens. when you're sitting on her lap, looking up at her with 'those' eyes though of course you have no idea what in the world she's talking about. or perhaps you're looking for something and let out a small noise under your breath, you often do this when you have to get up from the couch but you really don't want to. this causes her ears to perk up and the hair on her arms to stand. she's suddenly hyper aware of your body. or perhaps you're leaning down to pick something up, your skirt up slightly giving her a little show. half the time you haven't the foggiest that you were even showing anything. but ellie knows, every time you're going to pick something up after dropping it, her eyes are trailing all over your body even if you're merely clad in a jeans. she claims that the reason she turns wet is because of your teasing but you and her both know that she'd chalk your breathing up to teasing if she could.

NO, something she wouldn't do, turn offs pick this as you please, there's no kink shaming on this blog ! 🩷

ORAL, preference in giving or receiving, skill, ect ellie eats pussy like a starved woman. she doesn't care how sloppy or messy it gets, her tongue won't stop until she's taking in all your juices. in fact, the sloppier the better. she wants you to write beneath her, her arms holding you down and her nose bumping off your clit. she eats like it's her last meal, like it's the last supper. but that doesn't mean she doesn't like getting eaten too. even when she is, though, she's seemingly always in control. she'll grab a fistfull of your hair, making a makeshift pony tail and looking down at you. she's sure that she could cum then and there. she moves your face against her, not letting you do any of the work aside from the fact that you were the one doing the giving. she loves the way you close your eyes, whimpering sending shockwaves through her body as she practically face fucks you, riding and getting herself off from your tongue. sometimes, she'll tell you to touch yourself as you do it, watching as you use your hand to try get yourself off while tasting her. she doesn't stop until she sees her cum and drool dribbling down your chin, it's surely a sight for sore eyes. she's sure then and there that you may actually be an angel.

PACE, is she fast, slow, stamina, ect the thing about sex with ellie is that she likes to feel good but your feelings are her one priority. before anything begins for her, before she even thinks of feeling good, she wants to make sure you've cum at least once. with that being said, when the time does roll around that she's tying the harness onto herself, positioning her strap in front of your already sopping hole, she's only just beginning. you've already been through multiple orgasms and she's only just preparing for her first one. you're all wet from cum, sticky and messy allowing her to slip the strap in with ease. she'll be so hyped while you lay all fucked out on the bed. naturally, she has more energy than you seeing as you've had multiple orgasms whereas she's merely starting now. she's usually rough and fast and can last a whole lot longer than you cab. but at the end of the day you're also her angel so she makes sure to check on you and make sure that you're actually able to withstand another round. 

QUICKIES, her opinion on them? how often? ect ellie doesn't care when it comes to who, where or what. if ellie's horny, she's making sure to take you down with her. as soon as she feels that wet splotch on her boxers or that feeling building up in her stomach, her hands are on you in a teasing way, or speaking to you in a tone that would have your cheeks hot as ever, attempting to get you the very same way she was. she doesn't care where you are, who you're with, anything, all on her mind is getting that sweet release. she's had you in the bathroom of the tispy bison, her hand on your mouth to muffle the sounds as she shoves her strap inside you. yes, she wore it out. "shh, angel, gotta be- mmgh- q-quiet, 'kay?" making sure she's just as rough as usual but also the fact that you were in a public bathroom running through her mind. "can't let anyone catch us." but that doesn't mean she slows the assault on your cunt, fucking in and out of you as roughly as she can, her hand falling from your lips and replacing them with her own. she pushes her tongue between your lips, your head against the wall as she swallows all you sounds, letting you be flush against her as you find a familiar knot inside your stomach. she'll have you coming on the counter of the locked public bathroom of the tispy bison. truly, no flat surface is off to ellie when she's horny, no matter the place. it's just a matter of coaxing you into being as careless as she is.

RISK, is she game to experiment? does she take risks? this girl is insane. ellie is possibly the riskiest person you know, and sometimes it scares you. to ellie, nothing is off limits, nothing is out of the question and by no means is anything impossible. she's finger fucked you under a blanket while you're friends have been in the same room, she's had you sat atop her lap in the back of a tour bus (band ellie!verse) while all your other band members are at the front. she realises that they're distracted and decides that nobody is going to be letting her give this chance up, her strap is under your skirt, peaking out from her jeans. or, there's a vibrator in your pants while your parents are sat across from you at the dinner table, having no idea or what you were trying to keep down. the last thing you needed was to be moaning at your mother and father while they were eating their sliced carrots. ellie loves seeing you get all shy, trying your best to keep yourself neutral enough so no one would suspect a thing, whether it's at the dinner table or merely coming back from the bathroom at dina and jesse's, not meeting their eyes and when they ask what's wrong, you have to say it's because you're feeling a little ill and not the fact that you'd just been pressed against their sink, ellie's head between your thighs. of course, ellie always excuses you then because of your sudden 'sickness' and brings you home where she can take out her strap, finally getting you where she wanted.

STAMINA, how many rounds can she go for? how long does she last? as you can tell by ellie's muscle, she works out. and even if she didn't, she still has the upper hand of going on patrol almost every day. moral of the story? ellie's fit, and not just in the way that she's drop dead gorgeous and could have any girl foaming at the mouth by a mere stare, but as in she's physically fit too. she's spent her life running from zombies, she's taken down multiple clickers all by herself. this girl is one of the strongest people you know, which is exactly why she has so much more stamina then you do. she has no shame in the fact that she can go on for so many more rounds than you can, if anything, she's proud of it. and you, the amazing, beautiful, sweet girlfriend that you were, wanted to make sure that ellie got as much roughness out of her as she needed. sometimes, you'd just lay there, fucked out and hazy as she pumped into you over and over. you were her toy, a doll for her to use as she pleased and she was forever grateful. this way, by the time she was finished, you were completely exhausted but she too was tired, knowing she lasted as much as she could.

TOYS, does she own toys? does she use them? of course ellie has her strap which she just loves fucking you with. there truly is nothing better than having you beneath her after a hard day, roughly shoving the strap in and out of your hole, holding you still and grumbling to herself about how hard her day was. there you were, her own little toy for her to play around with. you always were. in a way, you are her toy. she uses you to her own advantage, whether she wants slow, sensual or rough and hard sex. she uses your body as she pumps the strap in and out of you, sometimes substituting it for... something else. she owns a dildo now, not for her, just for you. she'd bought it online/found it on patrol (depends which verse) when you guys were together and she couldn't not buy it/bring it home to use on you. she holds you close while she pumps the thing in and out of your sopping cunt, using your body like a toy. "doin' so well." she'll mutter against you, wanting you to feel the 'dick' go in and out of you without being distracted with the cloudy pleasure of her own. "take the whole thing, baby, take it." and she wouldn't spare any room, making sure your clit is pressed against the base, making sure you took it all. "atta girl."

UNFAIR, how much does she like to tease? ellie loves to tease. she loves it because she knows it'll get you exactly where she wants you in the end. she'll have you all subby and needy for her, hands pushing at her biseps, attempting to grasp her strong upper arms or your legs writhing against her head or perhaps she has you seated on her lap, riding a large wet splotch onto her grey sweatpants. whatever the case, she makes sure you're verbal, telling you that you must ask before you cum. being her good girl and obeying her rules, of course you ask before you cum, when you feel the knot in your stomach. you're so fucked out that you hadn't even processed the possibility that she'd say no until she does. you get all whiny so quickly, pleas and begs already falling from your lips. you can't help but beg her to let you get yourself off or start touching you again after she's stopped. later that night, she'll have your head in the mattress as her fingers repeatedly hit your good spot. "too much." you'll cry, everything feeling too much as her fingers hit the back of your gummy wallls. "you asked for this, princess." she'll remind you. "so just take it like a good girl, yeah?" never stopping her constant attack to your already leaking cunt.

VOLUME, how loud is she? what sounds does she make? for ellie, it varies. sometimes, she's loud, sometimes she's quiet, truly it depends on what type of sex you guys are having. but every time without doubt, she's grunting. ellie's a grunter and she has no shame in it. she'll grunt things into your ear, things she can't control like swear words and curses with the occasional whimper. "f-fuck, feel so good, n-nghh~" strangled moan leaving her lips as her 'dick' is deep inside you, trying her best to stay in control but it's just so hard when the base of the strap hits against her clit and gives her just the right amount of stimulation. or perhaps she's finding it so difficult to keep her noises at bay because she's sure that the strap is real now because she can feel the way your hole squeezes against her, swallowing her whole. "good girl, good girl, good girl." chanting it over and over when she feels herself coming, her entire vision going white while also trying to keep control of steading your hips, holding them in place as you try to writhe away.

WILD CARD, random head cannon ellie + plushie + you = heaven. hear me out. ellie loves the fact that you own so many plushies (even if she's threatening to fight them all off for your love) she won't let you cuddle one of them if she's around because she gets jealous, obviously, because only ellie would get jealous of an inanimate object. but when she's fucking you good, strap deep inside you and you're all teary, crying out for her, she has one of your plushies in her hands. she's handing it to you, cooing at you to hold onto it and 'squeeze' while she pumps in an out of you. it drives her crazy. the way you stuff your head into the plush of the teddy, screaming her name over and over as your legs wrap around her waist. but of course, she can't let the plushie have all the fun. she's grasping at your face, pulling it out from the plush. "none of that." she'll mumble, only wanting you to grab at it, not hide from her. "wanna see your pretty face." and she'll watch as your cheeks heat up, feeling impossibly more shy under her stare. she loves the way you grasp at the plushies from her hands, feeling all needy for her and needing something to hold onto. or perhaps she's having one of those days where she sits with a blunt in her hand, watching as you sit yourself on one of the plushies, riding out your own high while she watches you with low red eyes. ellie just loves those plushies (not when they're taking away all of your attention, though.)

X-RAY, what's going on underneath them clothes? a dark purple strap. she knows that you go absolutely feral for her strap and she has no shame about it. she makes sure to have you on your knees every once in a while, your hair caught in her hands as she pumps your head up and down, forcing you to take the strap like the good girl you are. and of course, you do. you listen to her mumbles of praises as you gag around the purple silicone, teary and doey eyes looking up at her as if it'll make you feel even better and when you catch sight of her own eyes rolled back, you do, the feeling of the base hitting against her clit just becoming too much. she'll throw her head back, still clasping onto the back of your head. even when when you're the one pleasing her, she's still in control, dominating you as she pleases and you'd be lying if you said you didn't adore it. ellie also has a very toned stomach and she's awfully proud of it, but what makes her even prouder of it is how feral you go over it. when you're babbling, trying to focus yourself on the dildo she's pumping in and out of you but you're pressing sloppy kisses all over her torso or perhaps she's sat you up on it, watching as you did everything in your will to ride out your high on her abs, knowing you couldn't get anywhere with the sloppy feeling of her skin. you couldn't get that friction you needed to finish, so, as always, you ask ellie for her help. and she's more than happy to comply.

YEARNING, how high is her sex drive? ellies a dog. you know this, she knows this and she has no shame whatsoever. she blames you, though, every single time without doubt, she blames you. you could barely be breathing slightly off and she'd use that as the reasoning for the fact that she needed you pinned down beneath her. "you were giving me the fuck-me eyes, baby." she'd inform you as she laid on her side next to you afterwards, fingers brushing up and down your arm with a grin on her lips. "how?" you'd barely mumble, voice sort of raspy from screaming her name for all the neighbours to hear. "y'jus were." she'd tell you, not elaborating any more on the fact. she'd often times blame you for the way she got so horny quickly, then again who else was to blame? and you were sort of glad that she blamed you and not the air having some weird pigment in it or something. this way, you knew she was focusing on you and only you. though, ellie did often times make up crazy excuses as to why she needed to dick you down in the next five minutes. "i read somewhere that today's national lesbian sex day so..." kicking a rock under her shoe. "you said that last month." you frowned at her. she rolled her eyes. "your ass just looks really good in that skirt, baby." once again, always your fault.

ZZZ, how quickly does she fall asleep afterwards? ellie takes such good care of you when you've both finished. she knows that sometimes she can be a little extra and sometimes it can get too much for you. but the beauty in having sex with ellie is what comes afterwards, knowing that she's there to wrap you up in her arms after a nice bath. she'll wash you, though she's tired the only thing on her mind is making sure that you're okay. she's always taking good care of you, reminding you that you're her sweet and pretty girl, when you guys are fucking and when you guys are finished. then she'll get you into bed, making sure you're all snuggled up. there's nothing like getting into bed with ellie after getting all clean, a fresh set of pijamas on your body and your hair damp. she'll hold you from behind, whispering little things to you despite the fact that she too is tired. but the thing about ellie is that she likes to make sure you're asleep first. she'll take notice to your heartbeat and your breathing patterns and finally, when everything slows and ellie knows you've found yourself succumbing to sleep. only then will she find herself drifting off too. 

main masterlist/ellie's masterlist

[love-is-patient]

I have religious trauma.

I was raised in a household where my dad wanted to be God, and so characterized Him in a way that left me constantly paranoid.

God was a judge, God was a debt collector, God was a hammer waiting to strike.

My mother was likewise delusional to a point. She used religion as a manner of control, manipulating my egotistical dad and our chaotic little world so she could feel better about herself.

I was abused in the church. I’ve been so many churches since childhood I can’t count them.

I was told I was possessed because I was a child with adhd and couldn’t sit still in a pew. I was told that if I didn’t see visions or speak in tongues, I wasn’t saved. I was told that I must be thinking about God at all times or I wasn’t good enough. That I was lukewarm, unlovable, unworthy.

I was too afraid to take communion. I cried and turned away from the altar multiple times because I was a too dirty to touch the offering.

I was told so many awful things that I grew up with a persistent religious paranoia on top of my already anxiety inducing life.

So… why am I still a Christian, after all of that?

Stockholm syndrome, right?

It would be easy to write it off as that, but I did turn away from religion. In the back of my mind. I stayed cautious in case God was still watching.

It wasn’t until I got rid of the destructive influences in my life that things changed.

My perception of God changed when I left the awful people using His name in vain- or for personal gain.

When I grew up, learned to be discerning about the character of people.

Many people live under the assumption that I did- that God is a tyrant who is waiting for you to mess up so he can smash you and send you to hell. Paradoxically, that almost makes Satan sound preferable.

But that’s not who God is, and he doesn’t want people to go to hell.

Even if you haven’t had good parents, you’ve seen what they’re like. They get excited to share experiences with their children. The first taste of lemon, the first puddles to splash in. First words, first laughs, first steps.

God wanted that for us.

Satan got jealous after his rebellion in heaven. He saw God had something good and wanted it for himself again - even if it was just to spite God.

He offered humanity a choice and we took it.

We can debate why it happened until we’re blue in the face, but what matters most are God’s decisions afterwards.

Everything that has happened since the fall has been God trying to bring his wayward children back without force.

Just like when you see that friend of yours making the same bad decisions day after day, and you know their quality of life would improve if they just stopped. It’s heartbreaking, frustrating. You can give them all the advice in the world but they’ll just keep on doing the thing and complain to you about every headache afterwards.

Now you know a little what God feels like.

Only God is a little more patient than we tend to be.

God doesn’t ask much from us, not as much as people, which is weird to think about.

God doesn’t measure your worth by how good you are at your job, how badly you do in school. He doesn’t equate your value to how rich or poor you are, he doesn’t judge you the same way people do.

The first thing he asks of you is to love him and love each other.

He loves us so much that he opened heaven again if we ask for it.

He came down as flesh and blood in Jesus and took all the punishments we should’ve had. In Jesus death and resurrection, we have a way home.

All he wants for us to do is acknowledge that.

He doesn’t hate you if you can’t pay tithe. He doesn’t talk behind your back if you make a mistake. He doesn’t demean, debase, abuse.

Why am I still a Christian?

Because God was there for me when people weren’t.

God didn’t abuse me as a kid, people did, and used God as a shield.

God didn’t lie to me, call me names, break my things - my parents did.

God didn’t order me to do unbelievable things in order to reach him - my pastors and teachers did.

God didn’t tell me I’m unworthy - people did.

Even if you don’t believe in God, if you’re angry at him, feeling hurt and betrayed.

Maybe take a closer look and see if it’s really the people around you making you miserable, instead of an untouchable, invisible hammer.

[merlucide]

KIRA I HAVE IDEAS I HAVE IDEAS what about we get an... drummer otoya, bassist karasu and singer and guitarist reader??? (If your requests are closed or if you don't want to do it, it's fine, ok? No pressure!!!!)

BAND AU W/ OTOYA AND KARASU HCS

Notes: GIRL. IN LOVE RN?! I love this idea so much omg?! (Soso sorry for how long it took to get this out 💀)

wc: 700

warnings: implied fem reader, suggestiveness?

I was thinking the bands vibe would be like: Mindless Self Indulgence // Destroy Boys // wych elm (but you can ignore this ofc 😋) I was also thinking like calmer like The Neighborhood and Big Thief

The three of you have been friends since high school, bonding over your shared love for music. Together, you formed the band known as (BAND NAME) / Third Chance!

In the band, you, Y/N, are the lead singer and guitarist, with Karasu on bass and Otoya on drums.

While you and Karasu handle the lyric writing, Otoya gives his input, but you just ignore his suggestions. Sorry Otoya, we aren’t writing a song about ninjas saving hot babes <3

Karasu occasionally contributes soft vocals, adding an extra layer to the music.

(BAND NAME) / Third Chance is a well-known band, and your concerts are always packed.

At the end of each show, Otoya rips off his shirt and throws it to the crowd.

After gigs, the three of you head back to your shared hotel room to unwind and talk about the performance.

you guys either go straight to bed after that or watch some stupid movies.

Otoya definitely shows up at your house at like 1 in the morning to ask if you wanna go get some snacks with him and Karasu. If you ignore him, Otoya will throw rocks at your window till you accept your fate. (He'd yell but Karasu told him to shut up)

Both Karasu and Otoya enjoy skateboarding in their free time, they make you judge who is the better skater (Karasu)

Writing songs with them is a lot of fun, with everyone contributing ideas (including Otoya, when you let him). You are so good at lyricism, which sometimes leaves Otoya in awe, although he'll still insist he could do better.

Karasu hums melodies and plays what feels right while you experiment with lyrics.

Dating Headcanons!

Karasu Tabito:

Your fans adore your relationship and create countless edits of you two.

Otoya gets so pissy when he see’s them lol

When you're working on lyrics, Karasu loves to sneak up behind you, resting his chin on your shoulder.

He's your rock when performance nerves kick in, soothing you with his touch and encouraging words.

Otoya hates you guys lmao

He’s just mad that he can’t get no girls and you both are so happy together. (( he is really happy for you guys though ))

Otoya pretty much third wheels all the time, literally every time you guys try to go out on dates Otoya will find away to come. 

You both have custom picks made for each other <3

Whenever he like sees you he goes up to like “Oh hey rockstar~ whatcha doing hm?”

He loves holding your hand, you love it too, especially with his ring-covered fingers <3

Otoya Eita:

He's SO smug about getting a partner before Karasu did lol

Also poor Karasu, you both would be at Karasu’s trying to write a new song.

Then you and Otoya literally suck each other face while Karasu’s tuning his Bass on the floor trying to ignore the sloppy tongue sounds.

He gave up on telling you both to get a room.

He likes helping you choose your outfit for concerts (( don’t listen to his judgement, he has awful fashion taste )) he chooses anything that shows off your butt/boobs

Pulls you in his lap to apply his waterline-liner every time before you guys go out on stage (( Que groaning Karasu ))

Otoya frequently breaks or loses his drumsticks, so you always have spares on hand.

He calls you "swagger kunoichi/shinobi," …. Yeah sorry

taglist: @gigiiiiislife @sharkissm @luvingshidou @kurona-theshark @soleilonthesun @duckydee-0 @rinitoshisgirl

lol I tried to make both of their sections even.. 🧍‍♀️btw sorry for any misspelled words lol- I just cut my nails so I forgot how to type 😭

Made June 5th 2024

[saphirered]

I saw the Autumn/Winter prompts and i have to.

So how about Solstice Kiss with Mollymauk preferably Spice and Fluff. I am a sucker for Molly (is it obvious?)

I’ve been dying to write for the M9 again! Especially after having been to the Live Show 😩Fluff with some spice coming right up! Hope you enjoy! 😘

The party rages on. Whatever solstice celebrations this village takes to are very much enjoyable. It’s a refreshing delight to see such peoples take to such debauchery without eye for consequence or modesty. Drink flows a plenty, delicious foods are shared graciously, and the company, the company does not judge. It indulges. When the carnival stopped here for their last show of the year they did not intend to stay this long but the snow kept them. A gift from the gods themselves according to some because they were welcomed by the locals and are more than happy to enable every poor life choice made on this eve for the sake of everyone’s enjoyment. No one would be left out. No one would feel sad or alone on this night. Tonight they are all among family and friends and lovers. It is a good night. 

Mollymauk watches as you dance with Bo the Breaker. You’re spun into the arms of Gustav next who offers you a cup you take to your lips. You’re dressed to impress. While he might be a little biased he dares say you are the most beautiful creature to be seen. While you danced he had occupied himself telling some fortunes here and there. He’d have done it for drink and trade but these people offered generously, even more so when their cups kept refilling. Pockets heavy they kept coming to him still and he would tell them their fortunes. They’d eat up every word but despite his nimble fingers pulling forth the cards he searched for, he was slower than usual. You caught his attention, distracted him whenever you entered his peripheral vision and you knew it too. Little minx you are. 

And then you disappeared into the crowd. His focus returned. If only for a little. Molly finishes up yet another fortune, reshuffling his cards how he always does, assuring they’re in the right order. He has a moment of respite and expects the next farmer to come chatter any moment. The chair opposite of him is not occupied but in front of him he finds a cup of questionable looking liquid. Arms drape over his shoulders sliding down until they link together over his chest. You perch your chin on his shoulder after pressing a quick kiss to his neck. He’s sure you can feel the goosebumps spread across his skin. Your lips are cold. He’s got every intention to change that now. 

“So everyone is having a good time and you are reading fortunes? We closed hours ago.” You chirp letting your cold fingers trail along the exposed skin of his chest. More goosebumps. He can feel your smile when your lips brush so close to his ear. Molly takes the cup in one hand, putting his cards away with the other before he turns to face you better. You take the opportunity to slide into his lap and take a sip of his cup. 

“What’s a little overtime for these good people.” He takes the cup from you. “I thought that was meant for me?” Teasing as ever. He takes a sip. Gods that’s good. Before he can ask you answer.

“Apparently they call it apple crumble mede. It sounds disgusting but tastes like apple pie. They also have cherry, chilli and whiskey but I’m particularly fond of the chestnut one.” 

“So exactly how much did you have to drink?”

“Not nearly enough to be even remotely tipsy.” You’re truthful. You’d only had a single sip of those before you settled on this one. You’d barely had one cup. Molly shakes his head. 

“Such a party and such little drinking? What has become of our reigning champion?” He jests and chuckles when you go to reach for the cup. He holds it out of your reach until you give up with a roll of your eyes. Only then does he feel safe to actually drink more. You clutch your hands together rubbing them for warmth and subconsciously move yourself closer into him. 

“Cold?” He asks. You don’t even make a point to deny it. Instead you curl closer to him. 

“I’m warm when I’m dancing. I feel like the dead of winter when I stop moving.” 

“So what you’re saying is we got to keep you warm somehow?” Molly gives you the most suggestive look he can muster just to humour you. 

“But what about the midnight dance?” You groan throwing your head against his shoulder. His fingers gently dance up your side, brushing up and down at an even pace. They slip under the fabric of your shirt. Molly is making it very hard for you to focus and he knows it. 

“If you insist. I’ll never say no to a dance with you.” You make no move to get up just yet. “Come on… It’s tradition after all.” He lifts you to your feet until you stand on your own, then takes a step backwards and with a ridiculous bow extends to you his hand. Your freezing fingers touch his and he instantly brings them to his lips, shiver running down his spine as the cold hits him but he doesn’t let it stop him. Despite his warmer body, Molly still very much is susceptive to the cold, perhaps even more so than you. 

Mollymauk leads you to the dance floor, where the commoners dance their commoner’s waltzes and let’s be honest, these are probably the only dances the carnies actually know. It’s something to bond over, to finally fit into the chaos that allows for mistakes and choses fun over perfection. The musicians play an upbeat tune while the locals sing the song in a chorus of dancers. Everyone seems to know the song, or at least enough to hum along where the words are but foreign to them or their ability to form coherent sentences, be they out of breath or too intoxicated. You spin under his arm, link your arm with his, close in, then apart, side to side and twirl around each other. You sway and sway, close in, a hairs breath away, and then too far. Repeat. 

It’s the midnight dance, following the patterns of the stars and skies and constellations long lost to Exandria but it matters not. You feel alive, so incredibly alive. The dance is a short, too short but when you see that burning in those scarlet eyes, see that love and admiration, that joy, you know it’s just long enough. You know how this dance ends. You’ve heard the locals talk about it when you ran your errands. And so when the last note strikes and the cheers erupt, you step in close within Molly’s embrace. You look him in the eye, then down to his lips and place yours against his in a feverish kiss. His response is quick, one arm wrapping around your waist and pulling you closer, the other at the back of your neck tilting your head ever so slightly to gain better access to you. You feel his lips part, his tongue brush against yours and you invite him wholly. Perhaps time slows, or perhaps it moves all too fast because when you part you want more, so much more and when you look him in the eye, so does he. 

Taking his hand you pull Mollymauk along away from the dancing and feasting people. Instead you make for a barn. Perhaps not the most glorious place but you’ve found yourselves in far worse. You quickly pick the lock and slide into the barn, Molly following behind. When he enters you quickly close the door and push him against it. Your lips are on his, hands sliding up his chest until you cup his cheeks. He takes a moment to recover but quickly his hand settle on your hips and in one swift motion he lifts you. You wrap your legs around his waist as he carries you along to the piles of hay. As you’ve done many times before, you push the coat from his shoulders. Begrudgingly he sets you down so you can take it off and without breaking contact once, place it down behind you. You use this moment to change places, urge him backwards and onto the coat. 

You are the image of seduction and you bring him to his knees with but one wanton look; your lips are slightly parted, your pupils dilated. He can see your breath rise and the twitch of your fingers. All it takes is a gentle push of your guiding hand and he is at your mercy as you crawl on top of him, legs on either side, fingers in his hair pulling at the roots ever so lightly. Your lips meet once more, tongues dancing together, but a taste of what’s to come, of what you are setting out to do. It’s safe to say those solstice kisses are intoxicating but you can do so much more and you intend to prove it. He all but whines when you trail your kisses down his neck, being sure to leave many a mark there, and go down further and further until you feel him. You look up at him when you reach for the buckles of his belt, teasingly slow to undo them. 

“Say the word.” You croon looking up through your lashes. You could have him undone right then and there. When he doesn’t respond thinking about what you’ll do to him, you let your fingers slip beneath the waistband of his trousers. The sweet noises he makes when he’s at your mercy.

“Please.” Begrudgingly he speaks but is cut off by his own mewling sounds when he feels your tongue circle him, then your lips wrap around him, just the once before letting your hands take over, stroking so slowly.

“That’s a good devil.” You grin and when you see the flush to his skin, feel his fingers lace in your hair you go down again. This will be an eventful solstice. One to remember for sure. 

[hollisartsblog]

Sorry for the long post, I just felt like I needed to get it out, if you want to read I'd be happy, if not, it's okay!

reading for the first time after almost 5 years what I used to write and think about late at night, and now I feel like doing it again, trying to find the right words.

I wanna talk about being in the moment as an artist, appreciating what you do, and not giving a fuck. (and loving ur young self)

I spent my teenage years drawing and posting here, so I had a lot to read tonight and to think about.

have u ever experienced that strange feeling, where you are like "wow. I was actually so beautiful and smart, who could have ever hated me?"

I was a completely different person, and maybe I miss that little girl, and maybe I hate her even a little. now, I'm not here to talk like I'm in a psychoanalyst's deckchair, of course. but I'm here, to resume the beautiful, however embarrassing in my opinion, habit of writing my most intimate thoughts (shareable, of course) that cross my mind at night, because maybe they can help someone, because we are never alone. just as they helped you years ago, just as it has helped me re-reading them now after all this time. I've had some crazy years. I was young, I was passionate and genuinely free to do whatever I wanted. I had friends, I had just sold a self-published book, I had "fans", I was "successful", I had good grades, I had a girlfriend, yet I wasn't happy. I know it sounds like the usual sweet story about happiness and self-satisfaction, but I don't think so (and even if it was, well, here we are ;) ) I didn't realize how necessary EVERYTHING that was happening to me was.

artists have a huge difficulty accepting that sometimes we have to look inside and accept that we have to constantly learn, instead we are always in a hurry to be perfect, to get likes, to earn, but that's not how it goes. I was literally 16 and already thinking about this, thinking I must be good enough to please everyone.

spoiler: you can never do that.

as I said years ago, our eyes are not the right eyes to judge us.

appreciate the compliments, don't dismiss them with an embarrassed smile. appreciate the effort and hours put into a work even if it is bad for you. hug your self when after a bad day you still have the courage to do what you love. being an artist is beautiful, but a huge burden, especially for us. remember that when our insecurities take over, we are not lucid.

yes, that drawing u posted that got 8 likes made 8 people feel something. how amazing is that?

yes, it will be fine, that text you wrote will be something new in someone's eyes, it won't be something read and re-read to make it perfect. you will amaze and make someone fall in love with what u did.

internet is an amazing place, and sometimes it's not. I got myself into a really bad place because I was too immature and too impatient to immediately be the artist I always felt I was, but NO ONE is after you with a clock ticking away time.

you really think someone care about how much time does it take you to get to your goal? why should it matter? I'm not going to list every single successful person who actually made it and tell you "look! they were poor now they are rich, so u can do it!". i'm telling you to always love the process; I would've punched myself in the face, I hated when adults told me this phrase, but it's true: everything pass. you are not gonna be like this forever. you are gonna love what you do one day, and love life because life takes but gives.

(tw: mental health) I spent years between psychologists and suicidal thoughts, I was never enough, and my art not only made me feel miserable, but it was one of the first reason I fell into depression. it always reminded me how plain, boring, and uninspired I was.

there was never anything that was right in what I did, every comment and every ask you sent me had no weight for me, they meant nothing because I didn't I believed in myself, yet I should have tasted it. now I reread them crying, not believing what I read. I was talented, man, I was full of ideas, I was amazing. I lost that spark, because of fear, of waiting for the right moment. i sabotaged myself because i was afraid of judgement, of pressure, when i had love around me, everywhere.

now I'm in Florence, far from home, studying in a private academy of animation and digital art. would I ever have thought that? absolutely no. I deserve it? Yes. because I, like you artists, have grown, we have learned, and I'll tell you this once and for all: do not give up. things are really getting better. now I'm not saying that because I magically healed and I love my art all of the sudden (unfortunately, I still really struggle) but please don't look at likes, followers. you're good, just because you love what you do, literally that's all that matters. I took a long break, now 2 years, because, as much as I didn't want to admit it, I was starting to hate what I was doing, it had become an obligation, a simple circle to mark before going to sleep on the to-do list. to alone.

16 years old. and it wasn't right.

love what you do, take breaks, post without checking a thousand times, show your work, accept compliments. you have created something, and that is enough.

look at you past as an amazing book you just read, the satisfaction coming from all the pages you already read and learnt from, now you are a different person thanks to them. look at you future with the same excitement when you still have a lot of those pages to read.

[respectthepetty]

So. I’m watching “the theory of love” and I have two things to ask

1. Does anyone actually like Kai? He doesn’t seem to care about Threees feelings at all or about his actions.

2. EARTH IS ON THIS!!?!!???? I stupidly have been waiting for Mix to turn up but obviously this was Pre?

3. Gun never gets a rear does he. Poor guy has to cry in every show he does.

4. They’re in uniforms a lot so been finding the colouring boys difficult so far.

Is that too many questions?! 😂

Anon, I like how you pulled a me and instead of asking two questions, you asked four! So let me get to answering them.

But first, Khai and Third are IKEA Queers, so . . .

Does anyone actually like Kai? He doesn’t seem to care about Threees feelings at all or about his actions.

Me. I like Khai. We are IKEA Queers, so we have to stick together.

Feel free to judge me, but after episode six, watching him suffer was food for my petty soul. This is what I want from my pendejos. If they are going to fuck up as badly as Khai did (THE FAKE-DRUNK KISS!), then I want them to feel pain. A lot of it. All the time. No relief.

And Khai definitely felt it.

All the time.

The idiot would not take no for an answer (but that's a JittiRain special), yet Third gave him back all the pain he gave to him, and that's what I like to see - revenge. Even in the special, Third was still kind of a jerk to Khai, and was looking even better for it.

I would never believe they would make it beyond this show (even with the four year time skip), but JittiRain said they are still together and going strong in Vice Versa with "RELATIONSHIP" right above Third's head, so . . . good for them?

Gun never gets a rear does he. Poor guy has to cry in every show he does.

Earth, Fluke, First, and Gun. Those are the men you hire if you want them good ass tears.

Amen.

Earth and Fluke had Until We Meet Again while Gun and First had Not Me, and those are both top-tier shows for most people. Imagine all four in one show, just crying, destroying our hearts every week. However, I'm going to put this on the record right now though - - First can outcry them all. I believe this with every fiber of my being. A director would just have to say "Khaotung doesn't want to be your friend anymore" and GAME OVER!

EARTH IS ON THIS!!?!!???? I stupidly have been waiting for Mix to turn up but obviously this was Pre?

The wildest thing to me is Earth played Type in Love by Chance which means he was Type of TharnType before the role was recast. Can you image Phupha as Type?! I have never watched a MAME series, but this seems WILD to me.

And Earth was paired with New in Water Boyy, like New of TayNew.

And of course, we got that taste of him with Papang in Moonlight Chicken.

So I think it's strange that Earth has worked with Mix several times when the behind-the-scenes for A Tale of Thousand Stars seemed as if director Aof was ready to murder Earth because he was playing around between takes, while Mix was crying every two seconds from stress and anxiety (which caused him to pass out). Mostly when White was RIGHT THERE!

Please, GMMTV, keep mixing things up forever and ever. Amen.

They’re in uniforms a lot so been finding the colouring boys difficult so far.

I watched it when it aired and haven't rewatched it since, so I don't remember if there was color-coding, but from my saved pictures, it seems like I had a theory that Third was a Yellow/Orange Oddity

but I have no notes, and the other pictures aren't telling me a complete story, so I think I got upset watching it and stopped tracking the colors. I stay petty.

I'd have to go back and rewatch it to give you a proper answer BUT I won't do that if JittiRain screws me over for the sixth time with Be My Favorite. So I'll make a deal with you, Anon - If Be My Favorite doesn't give me lies, manipulation, and the normal JittiRain (JR) nonsense to the extent her other series have included, I'll go back and rewatch Theory of Love for potential color coding.

But if JR fucks over my baby boy Pisaeng, not even the IKEA Queers can save this color-coding mission.

Pray for us all.

[mikibwrites]

WIP Wednesday!

Hi all! Since I've made a promise to myself to eventually finish and post this, I'm going to also promise myself to share my progress every Wednesday :) For your enjoyment, a bit from TrueBlood Tarlos (which doesn't have a title LOL are we surprised)

TK let him approach, but didn’t acknowledge him at all. Carlos waited in silence, in case TK wanted to berate him for his insensitive comment, but no yelling was forthcoming, it seemed. 

Carlos took a breath. “TK, listen —“

“Is that what I am to you? A fetish? You wanna put a fanger notch in your bedpost so you can brag to your friends?” His voice was quiet, controlled, dangerously soft; still, Carlos could detect the thread of hurt that weaved itself underneath TK's smooth tenor.

“What? No!” Carlos was stunned. That wasn’t what this was at all, not by a mile.

“I’m not a theme park attraction,” he said viciously, still not looking at Carlos. 

“I never said you were! Look, I’m sorry. I made a joke in poor taste, and I’m very sorry. I won’t say anything like that again, I promise.” He moved in front of the other man, but didn’t reach out to touch him at all. “TK, please look at me?”

It took several moments, but Carlos waited him out. Eventually, green eyes, still beautiful even with how hard and closed off they were, moved to lock with his own. 

“I’m sorry,” he said emphatically. “I meant it as a tease, but it was obviously not okay. I will never, ever say anything like it again. I don’t want to make you uncomfortable. I want to…to know you. I want to make you smile. I want to spend more time with you, if you’ll let me. So please, can you forgive me?” He made himself stop talking, and put the ball in the other man’s court. If TK chose to walk away now, there was nothing he could do. Carlos had somehow offended him deeply and he hoped they could come back from it, but he wouldn’t force the issue. 

TK just stared at him, same hard eyes and stiff stance. It felt like he was being forcibly hollowed out from the inside, all his faults and failures assessed and judged, but he held his ground. 

After an indeterminate amount of time, TK seemed to come to some kind of decision in his own mind because his eyes changed to liquid again before he moved so swiftly he was nothing but a blur to Carlos. Suddenly, he found himself pressed to the wall, their positions reversed, and cold fingers pressed lightly to his throat, keeping him in place. Not squeezing or pressing, just there. A chilly thumb brushed over the pulse point just underneath his jaw.

“Are you sure you want this? To put your guard down with someone like me?” The question didn’t sound like it probably was meant — a threat or intimidation. It sounded like a desperate plea to be understood. Carlos wanted to crack open that case and figure it out, probably despite his better judgement, so he nodded. “Yes,” he breathed. 

No-pressure tagging (sorry if you've already done it and I haven't seen yet!) @carlos-in-glasses @lemonlyman-dotcom @cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut @largepeachicedtea @rosedavid @detective-giggles @alrightbuckaroo @rmd-writes @basilsunrise @welcometololaland and anyone else who wants to do it!

[ariel-seagull-wings]

FICTIONAL CHARACTER ASK: RAY STANTZ

Asked by anonymus

@amalthea9 @angelixgutz @thealmightyemprex @goodanswerfoxmonster @spengnitzed @bixiebeet @themousefromfantasyland @stantzed @filmcityworld1 @professorlehnsherr-almashy

Favorite Thing About Them: Ray is one of the first dorky geeks that was proud of his geekness in visual mass media. He is optimistic, resilient, outgoing, curious, sometimes shows concerns and reservations, but when pushed into a new situation, he jumps with entusiasm at the adventure, and he loves to share his passion about the supernatural with people, and even if he appears at the wrong hour, or some people are just not interested and may judge him as a "weirdo", he never looses his entusiasm or acts ashamed of who he is. A lot of people in the audience would love to have him as a friend because of how quick he is to embrace new people into his life, and he is also one of the first plus size characters that many fans to this day consider phisically atractive, wich should be considered an important mark in the Body Positivity movement.

Least Favorite Thing About Them: When in the novelization of the 1984 movie, there was an insertion of "Innocent Insensitivity" in his character in a scene where he reacts surprised for Winston being black, saying that "the supernatural reacts more strongly in the presence of black people". I hope Winston had a talk with Ray about the concepts of positive discrimination and exotification, and why they are harmfull, in private after that.

Three Things I Have In Common With Them:

*I enjoy the taste of roasted marshmallows as a comfort food;

*I love comic books;

*I have a fascination with mithology and folklore from around the world;

Three Things I Don't Have In Common With Them:

*I'm too easilly frightened to want to make physical contact with a ghost;

*I don't drive;

*Both of my parents are still alive;

Favorite Line:

From the October 1983 Script Draft:

"Drop everything; Venkman. We got one."

"Peter, at 1:40 this afternoon at the main branch of the New York Public Library on Fifth Avenue, ten people witnessed a free-roaming, vaporous, full-torso apparition. It blew books from shelves at twenty feet away. Scared the socks off some poor librarian."

"No, this one's for real, Peter. Spengler went down there and took some PKE readings. Right off the top of the scale. Buried the needle. We're close this time. I can feel it."

"Spengler and I have charted every psychic occurrence in the Tri-State area for the past two years. The graph we came up with definitely points to something big."

"What do you mean by "seen?""

"Well, I was at an unexplained multiple high-altitude rockfall once."

"I told you it's real."

"Okay. Okay. I got it. I know what to do. Stay close. I have a plan."

"Okay, now do exactly as I say. Everybody ready?Okay... GET HER!!!"

"I guess I got a little overexcited. Wasn't it incredible! I'm telling you, this is a first. You know what this could mean to the University?"

"Then we were right! This is great. And if the ionization rate is constant for all ectoplasmic entities, I think we could really kick ass - in the spiritual sense."

"You said you floored ‘em at the Regents‘ meeting."

"My parents left me that house. I was born there."

"But at nineteen percent interest! You didn't even bargain with the guy."

"Wow! Does this pole still work?"

"Are you troubled by strange noises in the night? Do you experience feelings of dread in your basement or attic? Have you or your family actually seen a spook, specter or ghost? If the answer is yes, then don't wait another minute. Just pick up the phone and call the professionals —— Ghostbusters."

"Everybody can relax. I found the car. How do you like it?"

"Just needs a little suspension work...And a muffler...And maybe brakes."

"You know, Peter, this could be a past life experience intruding on the present."

"I just realized something. We've never had a completely successful test with any of the equipment."

"All right. Let's cool the negative vibes. These things can sense them."

"Sir, what you had there was what we refer to as a focused, non—terminal repeating phantasm or a Class Five Full Roaming Vapor...A real nasty one, too."

"I couldn't help it! It just popped in there!"

"It can't be! It can't be!"

"It's...It‘s...It's the STAY-PUFT MARSHMALLOW MAN."

"I tried to think of the most harmless thing...something that could never destroy us...something I loved from my childhood."

"The Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man! He was on all the packages we used to buy when I was a kid. We used to roast Stay-Puft marshmallows at Camp Waconda!"

"Either way we're history."

From the novelization of the 1984 movie by Richard Mueller:

"It's not a car, it's an Ectomobile."

brOTP: Peter Venkman, Egon Spengler, Winston Zeddemore, Janine Melnitz, Dana Barrett, Louis Tully, Slimer, Jake, Buster, Louise, Irena Cortez, Bryan Welsh, Ilyssa Selwin, Melanie Ortiz, Kylie Griffin, Eduardo Rivera, Walter Peck.

OTP: Winston Zeddemore, Elaine Phermon, Jenny Moran, @amalthea9 OC Peggy, @spengnitzed OC Michelle.

nOTP: Kylie Griffin.

Random Headcanon: In the 2009 videogame, Ray briefly mentions that he went to study in a Seminar, so I assume he was raised Catholic.

Unpopular Opinion: I wish he made use of the camera that he appeared at the beggining of the 1984 movie more often, as a way of documenting the ghosts behaviours, maybe even interviewing them. Is a pity that this filmaker side of Ray never went furter explored.

Songs I Associate With Them:

Frankenstein Twist

Monster Mash

I'm a Believer

The Night

Ghostriders in the Sky

Favorite Picture of Them:

Dan Aykroyd in the 1984 movie

His design in the pilot and first two seasons of The Real Ghostbusters

[yondamoegi]

What did you think of the new Fallen Hero game? o: I'm assuming you enjoyed it judging by your art, haha. What kind of Sidestep did you have?

Oh, I loved it even more than I thought I would, haha. Even if I'm not a depressed mess I was back when I first played Rebirth, the game still feels like it was specifically to cater my tastes. I love superheroes as a part of corrupt goverment institution (I liked My Hero Academia for this too until it dropped in quiality), I love that we're a villain (kinda sorta, does it make me a villain if the government is corrupt?), I love my poor meow meow Sidestep going "This is stupid, but I'm gonna do it anyway", I love how we have like 3 personas to juggle, and NPCs react differently to them.

From a game mechanics standpoint, I love FHR too. I love how it has unskippable plot-points, meaning it has a strong story. But it also has a lot of variety so you can replay it a lot. Also I love that it doesn't use stats like many other COG games do, where I feel like I can't do whatever I want to do in roleplaying sense because my skill is insufficient and I'll fail for sure and the game will punish me. Speaking of bad outcomes, FHR is well-written enough and I feel safe enough to choose very bad decisions (showing Lady Argent my face?! Don't mind if I do!), because if I fail the game won't end and the outcome would still be entertaining.

I bought the game three times, in Steam, as a separate Androind app, as a part of Hosted Games app, because I do love it a lot, and also the game still has no Save function (yet?) to transfer my progress to next games.

As for the Sidestep, I changed some things a little between the playthroughs. But I am always super empathetic because I'm weak and I can't be mean to fictional characters. My favorite Sidestep is my latest one, booted from my save file from several years ago.

They're such a fail-cringe person, Argent thinks they're a weak cheater, Dr. Mortum doesn't think they're his friend, they couldn't take out the fire guy, they're so neurotic and angry and rude and, sadly, suicidal. But they have a team of ragtag mercs, an old lady who brings them leftovers, and a company of very good boy Herald. I hope they'll be okay.

So here, have this doodle of them being positive for once

[ashleywool]

if you’re down for another long ramble: tell us about your current fave book or a book you think everyone should read :)

Everybody says "don't judge a book by its cover," but I will freely admit, when The Book Woman of Troublesome Creek by Kim Michele Richardson came up on my Scribd recommendations, the first thing that drew me in were the boots worn by the model on the cover.

I mean. Look at those sweet boots. Look at this Pinterest-perfect cottagecore ensemble. Look at that exquisitely weathered pair of books wrapped in sisal twine. You can almost smell those books. That "old book" smell. You know the smell I'm talking about.

Anyway, once I dug past my lizard brain's "o wao pretty picture" reaction, I saw that Dolly Parton named it as her favorite read of the year in 2021. I don't usually put much stock in celebrity endorsements in and of themselves, but I think we can all agree that, if any celebrity out there has generally and universally-applicable good taste, it's Dolly Parton. So, I started reading.

I loved it from the first few pages. The story centers on a young woman, Cussy May Carter, who lives with her coal-mining father in the Appalachian mountains of east Kentucky. In the wake of her mother's death, her father risking his job (and his life) to unionize his fellow miners, and her social unfitness for marriage due to her blue skin--more on that later--Cussy May takes a job with the Pack Horse Library Project. The project was part of the job-creating initiatives of the Works Progress Administration, a federal agency established by FDR as part of the Second New Deal to create jobs for unemployed Americans (particularly those with little or no formal education) working on public works projects.

For Cussy May, that job entails riding her mule into the most remote parts of the mountains to deliver books, newspapers, periodicals, and sometimes academic schooling materials to communities with limited access to these resources. Cussy May comes from a family carrying a rare recessive gene that causes the blood disorder methemoglobinemia, which gives her skin a distinctive blue tint. She faces considerable ostracism and discrimination because of this.

So basically, we have a poor, socially ostracized woman with a rare disease telling the story of how she finds community and a more profound sense of identity and meaning in her life by increasing accessibility of information and enrichment to other poor, sick, and/or disabled people scratching and crawling their way through life after the Great Depression trying to survive and maybe even thrive. For me, that alone checks an impressive amount of boxes of "stuff I find interesting." Add in the story of her father, a heroic UNIONIZER (y'all know how much I love unions) risking his life and health and basically everything he has for the cause of a better environment and better treatment for his colleagues? You sold me. SOLD. ME.

I've always gravitated towards woman-centered historical fiction (shout-out to my girl Samantha Parkington and the OG American Girls historical fiction series), but I was surprised at how much actual American history I became aware of for the first time because of this book. The Pack Horse Librarian Project was a REAL THING that people REALLY DID and I'm genuinely angry that I didn't learn about it in school--not even in AP US History, where my best friend and I did an in-depth project on the New Deal. Thinking back on it, though, our textbooks presented us with a very shallow (and frankly, classist and imperialist) understanding of the history of the American economy, and what it meant to have a healthy or progressive economy. Their metrics were based on the rich white people in the major cities--not the poor blue people in the mountains of eastern Kentucky.

Oh yeah, and the blue people of Kentucky were also real--and I suppose technically they still are, since methemoglobinemia still exists, but we now have a better (and less prejudiced) understanding of the condition and how to treat it effectively. But again, these are not things that we covered in our bougie-adjacent northern Westchester education.

One thing that I particularly appreciated about this story was that it focused on a woman having and fulfilling an industrious purpose in her life that had nothing to do with pursuing or prioritizing a romantic or sexual relationship. There is an excellent love story interweaved, but it's not The Point Of The Thing, and the author also doesn't do that annoying virtue-signaling thing of hitting you over the head with the fact that the love story is not The Point Of The Thing.

Sidebar: It's honestly incredible (and annoying) how rare it is for adult-oriented literature to deprioritize (if not exclude) romantic/sexual story arcs for adult women. That may be one reason why, when people ask me about my favorite books, the ones that come to mind first are the iconic YA classics we read in middle school (e.g. The Giver) that traumatized the butterfly clips right out of our hair--but like, in a good way.

Anyway, I won't give any more of it away, but I honestly can't think of any reason why the majority of the types of people who follow me here wouldn't enjoy the heck outta this book. I mean, we all love stories that champion accessibility and education and community and overcoming systemic oppression and prejudice, right?

Or, if nothing else, we all love a sweet pair of boots.

[hiswordsarekisses]

This is so good I’m posting it a 2nd time. It’s very sad, but so very important, because this has happened to so many people in this world. Some may read this and not realize that this is a perfect picture of what it really actually means to use the Lord’s name in vain. It’s not about saying curse words. It’s about using His name falsely - either for reasons of manipulating in some way, or claiming His name, like a wife takes the name of her husband - but not actually being truly married to Him in her heart. Many will answer for the hearts they destroyed in His name one day.

“I have religious trauma.

was raised in a household where my dad wanted to be God, and so characterized God in a way that left me constantly paranoid.

God was a judge, God was a debt collector, God was a hammer waiting to strike.

My mother was likewise delusional to a point. She used religion as a manner of control, manipulating my egotistical dad and our chaotic little world so she could feel better about herself.

I was abused in the church. I've been to so many churches since childhood I can't count them.

I was told I was possessed because I was a child with adhd and couldn't sit still in a pew. I was told that if I didn't see visions or speak in tongues, I wasn't saved. I was told that I must be thinking about God at all times or I wasn't good enough. That I was lukewarm, unlovable, unworthy.

I was too afraid to take communion.

I cried and turned away from the altar multiple times because I was a too dirty to touch the offering.

I was told so many awful things that I grew up with a persistent religious paranoia on top of my already anxiety inducing life.

So... why am I still a Christian, after all of that?

Stockholm syndrome, right?

It would be easy to write it off as that, but I did turn away from religion. In the back of my mind. I stayed cautious just in case God was still watching.

It wasn't until I got rid of the destructive influences in my life that things changed.

My perception of God changed when I left the awful people using His name in vain- or for personal gain.

When I grew up, learned to be discerning about the character of people.

Many people live under the assumption that I did- that God is a tyrant who is waiting for you to mess up so he can smash you and send you to hell. Paradoxically, that almost makes Satan sound preferable.

But that's not who God is, and he doesn't want people to go to hell.

Even if you haven't had good parents, you've seen what they're like. They get excited to share experiences with their children. The first taste of lemon, the first puddles to splash in. First words, first laughs, first steps.

God wanted that for us.

Satan got jealous after his rebellion in heaven. He saw God had something good and wanted it for himself again - even if it was just to spite God.

He offered humanity a choice and we took it.

We can debate why it happened until we're blue in the face, but what matters most are God's decisions afterwards.

Everything that has happened since the fall has been God trying to bring his wayward children back without force.

Just like when you see that friend of yours making the same bad decisions day after day, and you know their quality of life would improve if they just stopped. It's heartbreaking, frustrating.

You can give them all the advice in the world but they'll just keep on doing the thing and complain to you about every headache afterwards.

Now you know a little what God feels like.

Only God is a little more patient than we tend to be.

God doesn't ask much from us, not as much as people, which is weird to think about.

God doesn't measure your worth by how good you are at your job, how badly you do in school. He doesn't equate your value to how rich or poor you are, he doesn't judge you the same way people do.

The first thing he asks of you is to love him and love each other.

He loves us so much that he opened heaven again if we ask for it.

He came down as flesh and blood in Jesus and took all the punishments we should've had.

In Jesus death and resurrection, we have a way home.

All he wants for us to do is acknowledge that.

He doesn't hate you if you can't pay tithe. He doesn't talk behind your back if you make a mistake. He doesn't demean, debase, abuse.

Why am I still a Christian?

Because God was there for me when people weren't.

God didn't abuse me as a kid, people did, and used God as a shield.

God didn't lie to me, call me names, break my things - my parents did.

God didn't order me to do unbelievable things in order to reach him - my pastors and teachers did.

God didn't tell me I'm unworthy - people did.

Even if you don't believe in God, if you're angry at him, feeling hurt and betrayed -

Maybe take a closer look and see if it's really the people who were, or are, around you making you miserable, instead of an untouchable, invisible hammer.”

From https://www.tumblr.com/love-is-patient

[xiafeng]

Laps

Lately, an idea that I had pushed back many months ago has slowly started creeping its way back into my head and growing like a festering wound.

"Maybe we're too different."

"Maybe I'd hold you back from what you could really have."

You and I are from two different generations. The way you express yourself, talk, type, present yourself online on social media, take pictures, react in the moment, is very different compared to me, to the point that there are times that I question how you would find the appeal in that, let alone do it until it's second nature, and I even sometimes cringe internally in reaction to it.

We're also at completely different points in our lives. You just started your second year of your programme, and I'm a third of the way through my life, if not moreso. People already questioned and judged us, what more if we took it further? How do we set up a life around that? I wait until you finish your programme, and then what? Would you be ready to take the next step immediately? How old would I be by then?

And that's another thing - my age. I don't have the energy you do. I don't bounce back from things as easily and quickly anymore. Here you are preparing for half marathons, enjoying the burn and progressing your athletic skills to proper performance levels, and you describe how irritated you are at the person talking to you while struggling to keep your pace, and I'm left thinking back to how poor of a performance I gave while running alongside you. I couldn't push you the way that your friends do. I couldn't bring out that love for running the way they could. You just kept having to stop to wait for me to catch up, and spent majority of your time worrying about me, until you got antsy enough that you went ahead and ran an extra lap while I was left drained sitting on the sidelines watching and waiting for you.

Would you really be happy and fulfilled with a loser old man like me? Someone who wastes his days away losing control of his classes to a couple of single-digit children, coming home exhausted and spending every free moment lazily playing video games? Someone whose taste in clothes doesn't match yours at all, until your clothing suggestions for me are some that I think only your generation would look good in and wouldn't suit me at all, with some I don't even see the appeal in at all? You literally run laps around me on the track. My fashion sense doesn't match yours. I can't speak Chinese to your standard. I don't find myself as attractive as the guys you probably see around on a daily basis, bigger and more appealing looking guys with better fashion sense. Probably healthier with a better body and better lifestyles.

And on top of all that, you're someone with much more control than me. In my moments of weakness, I cave, but you stay steadfast, insisting that line isn't crossed. Your habits of coping seem much healthier than mine, and I think it won't be long until you've properly healed from all this. It almost shocks me how well you don't get phased, to the point I start to doubt (just a bit) if you even want what awaits the other side of that line, or if you're just saying you miss it and want it, but don't feel compelled at all to pursue it if given the chance, even if it's just to relive it for a fraction of a moment?

It makes me feel shitty to think that I wouldn't have been a good fit for you. But despite all that, I still wish I had the proper chance to try.

And at the end of it all, it at least gives me a strange sense of relief, knowing that you can at least get someone better than me in the end, who can do all these things for you that I don't think I would ever be able to do to your satisfaction; because that's truly what you're capable of getting, and what you truly deserve.

In the long-term, do you really think you'd have been satisfied with me and all these unremarkable aspects of me? I'm afraid the novelty would fade and you'd start to get bored of me.

Either way, at least now, you can achieve your full potential, without me holding you back, whether that be now, or in the long-term.

At least now, you make room for those who can keep up with your pace, and find people who will push you to improve and grow and reach that threshold that your current potential hints at. I can at least find solace in knowing that the spot is open for someone more your speed to fill in.

I've served my purpose of showing you what you're capable of and what you deserve, teaching you how to speak your mind and make your own decisions, but it's time for me to take a step back and pass on the position to someone better than me and who will match your level and taste more accurately.

I know it won't happen immediately, but you're already taking steps to cope in a healthy manner. And as I've said many times, you're young. There's still so much more time and experiences to have before you even reach my age. I think you'll find that person eventually. And that thought makes me happily bittersweet.

[reno2005]

When did you begin playing Resident Evil?

Why is Leon your favourite?

Top 5 favourote RE and/or Leon facts?

Do you have any headcanons?

It’s kinda long, sorry lol but thanks for reading if you do!

1. An older brother of mine showed me a video of a comedian at a gaming convention and the whole joke was how cartoony kingdom hearts was compared to how hardcore resident evil 4 was.(it was a different time for sure) so I was fascinated with how hard this game seemed.

One day I went to a swap meet with my dad and this man selling used video games had a copy of RE4. At the time I was too nervous to ask to get it since my dad was… not the kindest to put it lightly. Anyways I saved up the money, I begged my dad to go back to the swap meet to get the game, and luckily it was still there.

2. I had gone into RE4 hearing how cool Leon was.(like I said it was a different time, a lot of people on tumblr think he’s cute but back then he was Chad McGee, I still think he is but whatever that’s just me, don’t think I’ll judge anyone for how they see him)It was probably the hardest game I had ever tackled at the time so having gone through everything the game throws at you blew me away. Like, I’d never seen a man jump like 10ft out of a mining cart and climb to safety. I was so blown away in fact I had shown a friend of mine that one scene in particular like it was Jesus walking on water lol

Leon had such cool lines and his look was pretty cool too(as a kid of course I was “discovering” myself and my tastes). Y’know as a kid you see someone you admire a lot and you want to be just like them and him and the game as a whole was an escape from my pretty bleak childhood. If Leon could get through all that and still win and look that cool while doing it I wanted to be as cool as him. I wanted to look like him too, I discovered I was trans without knowing what that was until a friend told me about transitioning years later.

Right afterwards, because I couldn’t get enough of this guy I found out he was in RE2, so I bought that for the psp. Idk about you, but if I had to go through that shit, that licker would have killed me at the beginning.(which it did, a lot lol) I was fascinated with the game and I would start new games just to run around as Leon shooting stuff. It’s why I believe he’s so cool myself. You don’t get RE4 cool Leon without being already a bit cool.

Also a random addition, I think he’s really kind and caring.

In conclusion, he was my childhood hero.

3. I think it’s pretty cool he graduated top of his class and had extraordinary marksmen skills.

Something about him wanting to solve the disappearances in RC tells me he has an observant and critical mind.(which is why I don’t get why people call him dumb? Or maybe I’m just “old” now and don’t “get the joke”)

The “John Wick” thing Leon does is called the Center Axis Relock(CAR) and the cool swish swoosh stuff he does with Krauser is called Kali. We know he knew kali in OG 4 but with the addition of CAR in 4 remake we can assume he learned that back then as well.(which I’m happy about for preferential reasons)

Leon knows several different Martial arts styles. I don’t know the names but I used to watch martial arts movies a lot when I was younger.

From what I remember reading, his outfit in RE2 is a combination of different parts of varying types of police clothing (winter, summer, etc). Which makes sense since he’s trying to cover himself up as much as possible to avoid bites and grabs.

4. I think he’s a coffee guy.

He’s clearly a meat guy. If I saw a rotting cow carcass and thought of cooked juicy meat, I mean lol to add to that I always imagined he’s a decent cook.

I’d like to think he gets his hands on Matilda and then continuously gets it taken away in some form or another. Poor guy can’t even keep his favourite gun.

Maybe at first it was a new thing to him, but I feel he developed a taste for working out.

Not that he doesn’t like other genres, but if he’s a rock fan he has to like classic rock as well. It just makes sense.

I think he’d actually be pretty good with social media,memes, jokes, and etc.

Not that it’s his whole world, but he gives the impression he cares about fashion/his look to some degree.

I think he likes a fun lighthearted challenge just going off of his lines after completing merchant tasks and if he actually canonically stops by the shooting range.

I’m not sure how to word this one, but he seems nervous about rides and such if they’re out of his control. On the minecart and castle seat shortcut he either audibly shows distaste or uncertainty at the experience the ride will give. But on the jet ski he gives a cool reassuring line with no hesitation.

That being said, I do not think he’s bad at driving, steering, etc. but I’d rather not say anything more than that.