#“The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb.”

[impish-ivy]

After my post here, I realized just how many characters have familial relationships.

I think the reason the relationships ObeyMe’s characters have with each other is so wholesome is because they’re all found families.

There’s the obvious one with; the brothers and MC, Barbatos and Diavolo, and Simeon and Luke both very much parental (I think it’s said in canon that Simeon sees Luke like a grandkid?) and then there’s Thirteen and Solomon who have a sibling-like bond. Angels also view each other as sisters and brothers but it’s so distinctly different than the bonds of the brothers.

This game is filled with families made of chosen bonds instead of blood. And I think this is what ObeyMe excels most at—familial relationships.

I never have once thought “hey these two characters don’t feel like they love each other”. Every character feels like their familial bonds are strong and solid—even the more chaotic ones like the 7 brothers. You can feel the love ooze out of every one of their conversations and every interactions, it’s sibling love so it’s grimy but the love—it’s almost overwhelming.

I think their relationship is even more important when given the context that all angels see each other as siblings. Angels view each other as sisters and brothers but it’s so distinctly different than the bonds of the brothers.

[is-on-its-way]

For Mulder, Scully is his touchstone

For Scully, Mulder is her covenant (biblical)

[ramblingsfromthytruly]

BLOOD RUNS THICKER THAN WATER BLOOD RUNS THICKER THAN WATER BLOOD RUNS THICKER THAN WATER BUT BOTH FEEL THE SAME WHEN YOU'RE EYES ARE CLOSED I AM THE RIVER'S DAUGHTER I AM THE RIVER'S DAUGHTER I AM THE RIVER'S DAUGHTER AND YOU'LL BE HER SON WHEN WE'RE BOTH REPOSED

[autistichanseo]

This is a long one !! sorry!! here's some true brothers angst thinking (with comfort at the end) for you guys though <33 (also read the tags after reading this if you do read this maybe cos I go on another mini ramble lmao)

Thinking about maybe when Hanseo and Vincenzo live together in Malta, since all Hanseo’s ever known is getting abused (both physically and verbally) and hurt over any mistake he made no matter how small, he automatically assumes Vincenzo will do the same to him (of course he would, that's what he “deserves”, right?).

So he tests the water with Vincenzo a bit.

To see what Vincenzo’s limits were, what to avoid doing to not get hurt, what the unspoken rules were (after all Hanseok had plenty).

It starts with small things, not tidying up after himself, breaking a plate “accidentally”, leaving milk out to spoil (also “accidentally”).

But Vincenzo doesn’t hurt him.

He helps Hanseo clean up the plate he dropped, checking to see for any possible injuries. He casually tells him to remember to put his things away when they’re all over one of the rooms. He only ever lightly scolds him (it was more a reminder than anything) in a light tone to make sure to not leave out the milk out next time for too long because it’ll spoil, but it was fine, that they could just ask a maid to add milk onto the grocery list.

It both confuses and scares Hanseo.

It meant he didn’t know what would set off Vincenzo, and he couldn’t handle the anxiousness that clawed at him whenever he was around him because of it.

Plus he was apart of the literal mafia, who knew what he and his mafia family (that also lived on the island) would do to Hanseo when angered?? He had seen first hand all of the various ways he toyed with Hanseok, and couldn't forget what Vincenzo had done to him before he joined his side, so who knew what methods he'd use when angered?? He needed to find out what to avoid, and fast.

Vincenzo starts noticing and asks if somethings wrong and why he's been avoiding him, to which Hanseo was terrified (and slightly relieved) that this was when the other shoe would drop and Vincenzo would shout at him or hit him.

But that never happened.

When Hanseo told him nothing was up, that he was struggling to sleep a bit lately so because of that he's just been a quite tired recently and out of it, Vincenzo seems to buy it and offered to get him a therapist, as after all it makes sense he’d be restless after everything that happened not too long ago in Korea. He ruffles his hair and leaves and Hanseo is just left shocked.

Why was he being so patient with him?? Hanseok would’ve hurt him at so many points in this test, why didn’t Vincenzo? (“Any other person would’ve by now right?”)

Was he toying with him? Making Hanseo more and more relaxed around him so that a real punishment would sting more and Hanseo would blame himself for it?

No, he shakes off that thought immediately. His hyung wouldn’t do something like that. It had to be something else.

He needs to know when the other shoe will drop. So he escalates things. Better to know now than fuck up later and have his hopes ruined.

So he keeps “forgetting” to go to his therapy appointments. He “tripped” and broke one of Vincenzo’s prized art pieces, he refuses to move his things or clean up after himself. He goes out to drink almost every day and comes home at like 3am, sometimes blasting loud music when Vincenzo's sleeping.

Anything. Anything for the second shoe to drop.

And eventually, Vincenzo can’t take it anymore, but it didn’t go as Hanseo expected it.

Vincenzo and him get in a huge argument, Hanseo’s refusing to listen (the shoe has to drop now right?) and Vin just exasperatedly like “why are you doing this?” but he isn't shouting at him or upset, just… concerned?

What??

Why wasn’t he mad??

As Vincenzo is asking him to explain why he was being like this Hanseo can’t bottle it up anymore and just bursts out with “because you won’t hurt me!!! why wont you hurt me??? just get it over with and scream at me for screwing up or slap me or anything! just do something so I'm not always anxious around you and... scared everything’s going to- I don’t know, straight up collapse at any moment or something!! just tell me what your rules are!!”

And that's when Vincenzo realises.

Oh.

His heart sinks. Because he now knows exactly why Hanseo’s doing this.

He’s trying to figure out what Vincenzo would hurt him for.

He thinks Vincenzo is going to hurt him eventually like Hanseok did.

Oh.

It takes Vincenzo a moment to process this and it's suddenly silent and Hanseo thinks this is when the other shoe has dropped.

He’s filled with fear once again, but this time it spills over any sort of relief he could’ve gotten at finally “finding out what Vincenzo’s limits were” because Hanseo can’t read Vincenzo’s face right now. He associates that unreadability with the unreadable expression Hanseok would have on his face before hurting Hanseo.

He's bracing himself to get shouted at or hurt so he goes back into Hanseok-mode and takes a step back, starting to cave in on himself as he's about to try to apologise and take back what he just said.

Thankfully, Vincenzo realises this and immediately snaps out of his head to reassure Hanseo. "Hanseo... I'm not going to hurt you... I was never planning on ever laying a hand on you. Ever. Nor was I planning to ever shout at you."

And Hanseo is just.

Stunned.

He doesn't know what to say so he's only responds with a meek "Why?"

For Vincenzo to be like "what Hanseok did to you wasn't normal or even okay in the first place, and you'll never get any of that horrible treatment from anyone again." (Vincenzo will make sure of that).

And Hanseo's just. speechless.

He can't figure out what to say or do so he's just there, starting to tear up like "hyung..."

Because this is when Hanseo realises that for the first time in his life, he's truly, truly safe now.

Because now he has a home, and he didn't just mean the island they lived on, but Vincenzo himself. Vincenzo was home to him, and he was more of a home to him than any fancy villa Hanseo had had before could've ever been.

Yeah, he'll be okay now.

After all, no matter what happens, he has his home to go back to.

[ftl-faster-than-life]

"And the greatest gift they ever gave me...was showing me what family was."

"Barry might be a nerd...but you are such a sap, Wally."

[desertsportshipping]

So @texasflowers made an art post explaining how they think the Snag Machine works, so obviously I had to contribute.

Patreon - Etsy

[bonefall]

As someone who was adopted, I find it funny how much of a hate boner Warrior Cats has against adoption. Like, Thunder, my guy, are you not the one dealing with a horrendous biological father? Don'tcha think that the abusive prick is a horrible choice to leave children with? So what if he said he was part of the process in making them? Who they see as their dad is up to them. Blood doesn't create parents, love does.

Unfortunately, I suppose we're all stuck watching adoption be beat with a hammer because screw us? Man, I'm lucky I was someone who wasn't insecure about being adopted (well, to a degree... kinda shook me up seeing PO3 unfold as a kiddo). For a kid's series, they really do not think about the consequences it could have on children.

Thunder feels incredibly inconsistent in his writing, like they had 3 different ideas for what they wanted to do and couldn't commit to any

First he's rejecting Clear Sky and disavowing him as a father having realized that he's a violent ghoul.

Then he's going to bat in his defense just like Gray Wing, thinking "woah! Does everyone really think he's a monster?!""

And then we get to see him fetching Turtle's kits, back to early Thunder Rising character where he can't fathom a person Hating Their Own Father.

He cycles between these depending on whatever the plot needs. Thunder 1 has a GREAT reason to maul Tom, but the whole stupid subplot about convincing the kits that being a housecat sucks wouldn't work unless it was Thunder 3

I'm not adopted, but 2 members of my close family are. One of them was always trying to buddy up to their biodad, in a way that was... honestly, pathetic, sad, and formative to me. Biofather was a HORRIBLE person (I wish I had never been exposed to him) and caused nothing but pain to the entire family. There was no question why he abandoned my family members-- he was a sleaze.

The other is my relative's sister, and she's the type that says, "my adopted dad is my real dad. (Name) was just my donor." The garbage that Biofather put her through was endless, every time her brother dragged him back into everyone's lives, she always got hurt in some way

So DOTC is a pretty painful arc to me. The Skykin family strikes a personal nerve, and the sheer amount of undue sympathy they layer on Clear Sky but not his victims just... it makes my skin crawl.

And god, you can tell that the writers believe the same shit that Male Family Member believes. That something about your genes just draws you towards your biorelatives, and that nothing is more sacred than that, no matter how much this toxic relative hurts you and the people you love.

Love makes family. Blood just bleeds.

[brionysea]

they put max in mike's colour for the episode where she gets targeted by the trauma monster. max why are you in blue. why does trauma + monster = blue and blue = mike so mike = trauma + monster. even her hair looks less bright because she's depressed and both the monster and the trauma have her in their sights (max's colour is equal parts "orange" and "rainbow" To Me)

the blue (mike's colour!!!) took over max's character (like how el is pink but the blue takes over her when she's in a state of mutually assured destruction with mike) and then max dies in the bluest attic ever and ends up comatose in the bluest hospital room known to man. thinking yet again of mike vs max and el's feminism. she's her own person who's fully capable of making her own decisions so PLEASE STOP DROWNING HER IN THE BLUE, MIKE!

also the blue attic is disrupted by the red gate. between that, the roses, the spooky fog, and the mind palace, vecna is red. blue + red makes me think of blood in the water which draws sharks (the imagery used for barb's death + by nancy realising the demogorgon is drawn by blood), BUT with this imagery MIKE is the unfathomably expansive ocean and vecna is the piddly little drop of blood. the sea was calm until vecna summoned the sharks? also the possessed mike agenda of blood being IN the water

[canichangemyblogname]

Watching the Netflix-made documentary on Alexander the Great and the actor playing Alexander’s father in the supplemental visual story telling of the archaeology was scripted to shake hands with Alexander and ask him for forgiveness because “blood is thicker than water.” << Those words exactly.

I immediately paused the show and walked into the other room to stand there like this:

[angelofthemornings]

me: no don't stop traffic to let me out just keep everything at an even flow I'll be okay I promise

me, after being let out, going 15 mph over the speed limit: I drive fast for you brother

[kon-konk]

Mikuni: sure in the process of making My home life better I accidentally destroyed Mahiru's whole friend group, but hey! His mom and dad are both alive and happily married, that makes up for it right!

(nevermind the fact that Mahiru and Touma hate eachother, and that Tsurugi someone Mahiru cares about just doesn't exist in this world)

Mikuni: I heard "blood is thicker than water" and ran with it

[letting-darkness-win]

You don't owe loyalty to your family.

They have to earn it too.

[readingcircletemple]

Editing Thoughts:

As we reach the end of the Circle of Magic series, magic starts to get weird, y'all. I know a lot of people struggle with things that happen that are not previously established, but I never had an issue with them. Yes, this is my series. I grew up with these books, so CoM is kind of my baseline for magic anyway. But I'm going to pitch one more possible explanation fror why I think it works:

I ran across this video by Timothy Hickson a while back, in which he explains how soft magic systems work really well to emphasize the emotional beats of a story. (This, incidentally, helped me understand why I like soft magic systems so much.) This works particularly well in CoM because we see in the first couple of books how emotional states can have an influence on magic--namely, when Tris is angry, she sparks. And she must learn to control her anger.

So at the end of Shatterglass, when Tris basically opens a hole in the ground? This is again, an echo of her anger. And at the end of the Will of the Empress, Tris's ability to be with the other three "physically" while still being so far away is the CoM version of the family member leaving and saying, "I'll always be with you in here (points to heart)."

The thread circle is a symbol of the childhood bond these four form. Then they part from one another, grow, change, and return. For many of us, childhood friendships fall apart as we grow older. We leave friends and that's that. And throughout the book, they struggle with whether or not their frienship has ended--if it was just a childhood thing. And in a way it was, and in a way, it wasn't. By the end of the story, they reform their friendship anew--it is no longer a childhood bond, but an adult one, which comes with all the complexities of adulthood. So the thread circle--the symbol of their childhood friendship--disappears as they form a newer, deeper, stronger bond. And the circle goes deeper--literally moving into their hands--and leaving them with a scar, just as friendships can both open and heal wounds. And yes, it's something new and unexpected, that can't easily be explained. But isn't that so much of what life (and friendship) is?

But I would be wrong. Let us know what you think in the comments.

[reccord-raccoon]

Fire Emblem Siblings week 2023 day 2: fears/books

the Fraldarius siblings protect one of the Gautier siblings from the other

drabble under the cut

Felix ran a hand over the weathered leather of the old diary. His husband's, from long before the thought of marriage crossed either of their minds.

The pages in Felix's hands held all of what was left of the true nature of his brother. Of Both their brothers. No one else close enough to know them had kept a diary as faithfully as Sylvain had.

"Speak of the devil," Felix whispered when he heard the door open behind him.

"Whatcha lookin' at?" Sylvain's voice sounded cheerful, but Felix had known him for much too long to truly believe he was.

He didn't answer. Instead he let his husband brush aside midnight hair and rest his chin on his shoulder.

Sylvain hummed, "That old thing? What about it caught your attention, love?"

Felix opened it to the page his thumb hand been saving and let their eyes scan it before speaking.

"...the well…"

"I remember this," he whispered.

"…Glenn and Felix saved me…"

He felt Sylvain shrug. "Kinda hard to forget. My brother was a pretty big dick."

"…I'm still pretty cold, but Glenn let me borrow some of his clothes while mine dry off…"

"That was the day Glenn and I realized just how bad Miklan actually was. Glenn vowed to stop him however he could. I vowed to protect you."

Sylvain stilled. Too afraid of his emotions breaking through to dare to move.

"I remember how I felt that day," Felix continued, "but I don't think I ever…"

knew how you felt.

The unspoken words hung in the air and young Sylvain's loopy handwriting burned in front of them.

"…Miklan tried to yell at me again later. But Felix and Glenn were there so he didn't. Felix was hugging me and Glenn's hand was on my shoulder and even though I was still scared, having them by my side made me feel like I could conquer the world…"

"Maybe with them I could even fight Miklan."

@fireemblemsiblingsweek

[space-station-collective]

I have acquired Several Children /lh

anyway yeah I now have two children in other systems, it's great, I love my sons /fam

found family between systems and headmates in the same brain is so lovely, we are bonding over things and forging our own paths, with the people we want

(some thoughts on chosen family after the cut)

the blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb. that means that chosen family will always be stronger than blood relations, if you so choose

there are people in the world who will try and say that you should remain loyal to your "real family" no matter what, but those people are wrong. blood relation holds no value beyond what people prove they deserve

so remember that, your chosen family is yours, and anyone who tries to say otherwise is plain wrong

love your family, whoever that may be. find your own path if the one you were born on fails you. you will find your way eventually, I promise

in case nobody has told you today: you are loved. you are cared for. I see you

-the host (he/they)

[ravynfyre]

happy birthday dad

sad, sordid tale beyond this cut

eleven years ago, on the 26th of march, my dad collapsed unexpectedly, and ended up rushed to a hospital several states away from where i lived at the time. he spent his birthday, march 28th, unconscious in an icu, while *that bitch he was married to* and i sat by his bedside, hoping that he would wake up. once he finally did, on two separate occasions, *she* "went out to smoke" and just... drove the several hours home without even saying goodbye to him, because she "just couldn't deal with him anymore." over the following three weeks, i would make several trips there for a few days at a time to spend with him in the hospital while they worked to figure out what was going on. my husband at the time *begrudgingly* let me use the credit card to cover the hotel stays and fuel for these trips, with the understanding that I would pay back every penny. that was probably not even the first writing on the wall that i should have taken note of, but, in my defense, i was a bit distracted at the time with worrying about my dad. by the end of that three weeks, they had finally discovered "lesions" on his brain that the docs felt confident was an infection that would easily clear up with the correct medications. dad told me to go home and stop worrying about him, and he'd be in touch, that i should stop coming down to visit because *she* was getting stressed out by me being there all the time, and also, he was just ashamed of me seeing him that weak. stupidly... i agreed.

spoiler alert: it wasn't an infection.

of course, i wouldn't find that out until many many weeks later. dad told me that he would call me when he was sent back home, but that call never came. by the end of april, i was pretty worried, and started calling their house all the time. no one ever answered, but i left messages. i left many, many messages. i called the hospital, but, of course, they could not, would not tell me anything.

mid may, that bitch he was married to sent my sister and i an email. in it, she said that i needed to stop being a lazy, selfish bitch, and come pick up my father, because she was "done dealing with him." she was "*tired* of being the only one ever taking him to his oncology appointments". she was "*tired* of changing his *diapers*". she was "*tired* of doing it all alone", so it was MY turn to deal with him because she was *done*.

this was the first time that either of us were told that it was cancer. glioblastoma. the same one that killed senator mccain. except my dad didn't have a cadilac, gold star, senatorial health care plan. mccain got over a year from his diagnosis before he died. my dad died june 17th - father's day. not even three full months.

as soon as i received that e-mail, i called, wanting 1) to know what the fuck was going on, and 2) when i could come down and start helping out. again, no one answered. no one returned my messages. i called the local sheriff's department down there and explained what was going on and begged them to do a welfare check and see if the contact information i had was correct (even though it was clearly that bitch and my dad on the answering machine where i was leaving my messages). they sent out a deputy, and i received a call back stating that the "legal resident at that location did not want them to pass along any information to me or my sister." the "only thing" that the deputy speaking to me could say without getting into trouble was that the "legal resident at that location" had not changed in the last at least 2 years, and i could make of that what i would. he did warn me, however, that the "legal resident at that location" was "prepared to press charges for trespassing" if anyone they did not approve of "happened to show up", and to be careful.

i had the feeling that this deputy was rather pushing the boundaries on what he was technically allowed or supposed to do... however, my dad had been a sheriff's deputy twice in his life: once when i was a young child, and once again just a few years before this incident, so i think there may have been some "professional courtesy" playing there.

over the next week, i received a couple more nasty emails from that bitch dad was married to. i called at least twice a day, every day, and always left a message. it was on day 7 after having spoken to the deputy that i called, and someone answered.

dad answered.

he was... not my dad. he slurred his words, spoke in childish phrases, seemed to lose the conversation often... and then, suddenly, in the background, i heard *her* screaming at him, demanding to know what he was doing, and how "he knew he wasn't allowed to answer the fucking phone!"

she took over the call, and then started screaming at me when she figured out who i was that it was "about fucking time that i gave a shit about my father", and "where have i been for the last two months?" and other such bullshit. i asked her why she was lying and why she'd been trying to keep me from talking to my dad. she screamed at me about accusing her of lies and other crap, and i explained that if i didn't get to speak with my father, that i would call that sheriff's department up and file a charge of elder endangerment against her. she literally threw the phone back at my dad and screamed stuff at him. i should have called and made the request to file the charge anyway, but, hindsight.

anyway, i was finally able to talk to my dad again. he admitted that, yeah, it was cancer, but they were going to "fix it, don't worry" and that "everything was going to be fine". except that wasn't the first time i had dealt with someone with a severe brain injury before; my best friend from high school had gotten sick a few years before and had, at that point a 15 year old's intellect. (she had a relapse a few years later, and now functions as, at best, a 12 year old)

over the course of the next two weeks, i talked to dad as often as she would allow him to answer the phone - about every other day, give or take. but one day, one particularly bad day, when dad was less with it than usual, in my desperation to talk about something, *anything*, no matter how mundane or stupid, i asked him what he'd had for lunch. small talk, something just to keep him from getting bored and hanging up the phone.

that bitch he was married to assumed that i was accusing her of starving him, apparently, because she suddenly *shrieked* from the background, "what the fuck is that supposed to mean? of course i'm feeding him!!!" and then hung up the phone.

i called back right away, but when dad answered, he said that *she* didn't want me talking to him anymore if I was "just going to accuse her of bullshit". i tried to explain that i was just trying to make small talk, because i loved him and wanted to talk, but she just screamed in the background, and dad finally said that i was "just making trouble" and that *she* would "have me arrested for trespassing if I *dared* to show up in that entire fucking *county*!" and finally that, "maybe i should just not call ever again," since i was such a horrible person and all. i asked him if that was what he really wanted.

he said yes.

he said goodbye

he hung up.

those were the last words i ever spoke to my father, or him to me.

and every march 28th, i remember that.

i loved my dad a lot growing up. he was always larger than life and he was everything i ever wanted to be. he didn't beat on my sister and i like mom did. he would sneak us poptarts after bedtime on nights mom would send us to bed without dinner. he would take me to work with him sometimes, so i could see all the neat things he did. he would take me down to his woodworking shop and teach me those things all the time, too. he taught me construction and remodeling.

this was also the man, though, that lied to me about marrying that bitch one weekend, two years after mom died when i was a teen.... saying that he and *she* were just going to spend the weekend together to "work things out" since their relationship - started pretty much the same month mom died when i was in high school, but kept secret until i got home from a post-graduation cross-country trip in july - had been rather rocky. *she* "loved" him, but she *hated* me because I was a "scary witch that her entire family was terrified of".

i had come out as pagan when i turned 18. but my "dark hoodoo magic" was "out to get her" or something, so she would be living with us for a few months, then she would move out because she was "scared" again. that shit went on for the three years of college i managed to get. until she gave dad an ultimatum: *her* or me. so dad...

he told me to be ready to move out in two weeks. *she* "would not live in the same house as me anymore," so i had two weeks to find somewhere to go.

except a few days later, *she* said fuck it and moved out, anyway, with "no intention to ever return." well, good riddance, said i, and figured that meant that i wouldn't have to leave.

except on the friday of that two weeks, dad brought home a u-haul and said that he needed to take it back on sunday morning, so i had that long to pack my shit and get it out, otherwise, he'd throw the rest in the trash.

my sister came to my rescue and gave me a room in her rented farmhouse. and for decades, i resented that fucking bitch my dad was married to for everything that happened. she died of cancer last year, and i went outside and *danced* in the moonlight the night i found out. i danced and i sang and i howled like a coyote and prayed with every fiber in my being that it hurt and she suffered every bit as much as my mother had suffered while she had fought cancer the whole last three years of my high school years, before she finally died.

what i didn't pray for, but what i did receive, was *clarity*.

yeah. *she* was a first rate fucking bitch. *she* destroyed my life in so. many. fucking. ways. i am glad that *she* is dead, and i still do hope that *she* suffered.

but at every single chance my dad had, at every single point that it came up...

he chose *her*.

it's only been within these last six months or so that... that the rose tint i imposed on aspects of my childhood has been wearing off. i always knew that dad wasn't perfect. no one is. but those times dad snuck us poptarts? why didn't he keep mom from beating us and sending us to bed without dinner in the first place? not beating on us himself? why didn't he just... not let mom beat us? taking me to work? was because they didn't want to pay for a babysitter. yeah. i was a latchkey kid, but even our neighbors probably would have thrown a fit at leaving a child my age unattended for *that* long on a weekend when he was on call. teaching me woodworking in his shop? he never invited me down; i just followed him. i learned by watching. not because he *taught* me. learning remodeling and construction? he needed another set of hands, and my sister was already off doing high school and college things; i wasn't so i may as well be useful. my college fund was spent on mom's medical bills. dad later told me that he "didn't think i'd need it anyway". that it was "obvious i'd never get that far in life without him paying off the profs." that he was "so proud that i proved him wrong," when i became a full time, professional firefighter.

this is the first time i have every written some of this down. i've *said* most of this to one person in the last few months, as it has... slowly occurred to me. but i have never written it down and reread the words and *accepted* them.

my father was not the man i thought he was.

i used to blame my mother for pretty much all of the trauma from my childhood. gods know she gave us plenty. but i'm finally to a point in my life that i can accept that... she wasn't the sole progenitor of it. that the man i pretty much modeled my life around... was just as responsible.

so... happy birthday, dad. i used to hope that i made you proud. at least a little. but i think i am finally to the point where i don't care if i did, or i didn't.

because you weren't the dad i thought you were. and just once. just one. fucking time.

i wish you would have chosen *me*.