Bye Bi Steve
Thank you @nburkhardt and @doubleb11 for the ideas on this fic! I hope you guys like it and please leave your thoughts in the comments!
Now with a Part 2!
~*~*~*~
All throughout his life, Steve has denied his interest in guys. He discredited his feelings for Tommy H. as friendship and placed his attraction to Billy as jealousy. He liked girls, had loved Nancy, so he couldn’t be interested in guys. Steve kept telling himself that all throughout high school, all throughout 1985, up until a random day in the summer of 1986.
It had been a shift just like any other, covering for Robin while she mooned over Vickie at the community pool. Steve was organizing tapes in the romance section in a way he knew would infuriate her when she came back when he heard the bell chime. “Welcome to Family Video, how can I-”
He stopped mid sentence when he saw it was Eddie. His hair was pulled back in a bun showing off the contours in his neck as well as a couple of piercings in his ears. His skimpy black T-shirt that showed off his scars and tattoos in equal measure did nothing to mute Steve’s attraction.
“Hey Big Boy, when do you get off? It’s hot as shit out today and I refuse to go to the community pool with all of the religious zealots and their mothers. Fancy sharing your pool with the rest of us peasants, my liege?” Eddie blinked up at him through his eyelashes.
Fuck, shit, fuck! This was not what Steve needed today!
Fortunately, his outward composure remained calm despite his internal crisis. “I work until 10 tonight,” Eddie groaned but Steve plowed through the interruption. “BUT, I can give you my house key so you can swim. You can bring the kids over and use the pool as long as you watch them, alright?”
Eddie nearly hopped up and down in excitement, “thanks Stevie! I knew I could count on you! I love you!”
He went to run out of the store but Steve called him back, “Eddie! I didn’t give you the key. Here, try not to make a mess please?”
“No promises, Stevie. Thank you!” Then, he pranced through the door and was gone with a squeal of the van’s brakes.
Very calmly, Steve walked to the door and flipped the open sign to closed. Then he turned the lights off and made his way to the dingy floor of the bathroom. It was there that he spent the next thirty minutes on the verge of consciousness, having a panic attack so brutal that he thought it might kill him. His entire life, he thought he only liked girls but just a moment of seeing Eddie looking so hot so effortlessly was enough to unravel everything he thought he knew about himself.
Once he wrapped his head around being attracted to Eddie (he’d seen monsters with faces that opened up like a flower filled with teeth, there were stranger things than finding a hot guy hot), he realized that he needed help. He couldn’t go to Eddie for obvious reasons and Robin was too busy to help him with his crisis. So he did the only thing he could think of… he called Nancy Wheeler.
Using the store phone at Family Video while hiding behind the counter was a low point for him but so was calling his ex-girlfriend to tell her that he might like guys. He waited for her to pick up the phone for what seemed like forever but was only a few seconds.
“Hello, Wheeler residence. This is Nancy.”
“Nance, it’s Steve. Can you come to the video store to talk? I’m kind of having a crisis and I need to talk to someone. Robin and Eddie are busy and I really need to talk to you because I think I might actually be going insane,” he rambled.
“Steve? Calm down, what’s going on? Aren’t you working right now?” Her voice filled with concern as she questioned him.
“Obviously not well! I had a crisis so I shut the door, it’s fine. Can you please come? Please, Nancy?” Steve was begging her but he hoped she wouldn’t hold it against him.
He heard her sigh and then, “fine, I’ll be there in five minutes. Just- hold on, okay? I’m sure everything will be fine.”
And so, he waited for five minutes in a sense of fake calmness. His hands were still shaking with leftover anxiety and sweat was dripping down his forehead from the stress but he was fine. He certainly didn’t jump a foot into the air when he heard a gentle knock on the door. When he peeked over the counter to see a confused and worried Nancy though, he calmed a little bit.
He unlocked the door and opened it just enough to pull her inside before slamming it closed and locking it again. “Steve, are you okay? You don’t look very good.”
He started pacing back and forth in front of her. “Okay so, I have something really important to tell you and it’s kind of a secret? Like if you tell the wrong person, it could get me killed. But I have to tell someone because I’m pretty sure I’m losing my mind.”
She put her hands on his shoulders and looked him in the eyes. “Steve, just tell me.”
“I think I like guys. Eddie specifically, I think I like Eddie.” They both stared at each other in silence. Nancy’s face was blank as she thought over his words and Steve’s heart only seemed to race faster at her nonchalance.
“Okay, is that it?” She asked him.
“What do you mean, ‘is that it’? I’ve been freaking out all day!”
“Steve, it’s okay that you like Eddie. Thank you for telling me and I’m glad you felt that you could trust me with this information. Why are you freaking out about that?” She reassured him.
“I like girls, Nancy! I can’t like Eddie!”
“Why not?” She asked with her eyebrow raised. “No one can tell you how you feel besides you, Steve. If you like Eddie, then you like Eddie. There’s nothing stopping you from liking girls and boys.”
“Nance, you have to be either gay or straight. There’s no in-between.” He said in frustration.
“Yes there is. I read an article about bisexuality, it’s when you’re sexually attracted to both girls AND guys. So if you like Eddie and still like girls, it sounds like you’re bisexual,” she explained to him.
Steve’s eyes widened but his voice was small when he whispered, “and that’s okay? It’s okay that I’m bisexual?”
Nancy gave him a soft smile, “of course, Steve. It’s perfectly fine to be bisexual. And I’m pretty sure that Eddie has a thing for you too.”
Steve grinned at her words and pulled her into a hug that she returned gently. “Thanks Nance, I needed that.”
“Of course. Things may be awkward between us but we’re still friends, Steve. And I meant it, I’m glad you felt safe enough to tell me.”
They talked for a few more moments and by the time she left, he felt a lot lighter. He was bisexual and that was okay.
~*~*~*~
It took a few more weeks of coming to terms with his sexuality before he could tell Robin and Eddie. Both of them had come out to him so he felt safe in the fact that they would support him whole-heartedly. Even then, it came out accidentally while watching The Rocky Horror Picture Show at their weekly movie night at the Harrington house.
“He’s hot, I’m digging the fishnets,” Steve said while throwing some popcorn in his mouth.
Both Eddie and Robin snapped their necks to look at him. Eddie looked a little hopeful while Robin looked offended. “Steve, you can’t just say that. Are you seriously making fun of our favorite movie?”
Eddie’s hopeful expression turned mutinous at her words and he scowled. “That’s not cool, man. We’re trying to share one of the most important movies in queer culture and you’re mocking him because he’s wearing fishnets? What, does that infringe on your fragile masculinity so much?”
Steve hurried to backtrack and set the bowl of popcorn down on his coffee table away from his flailing arms. “What, no! I seriously just think that Tim Curry in fishnets looks hot, I’m not making fun of anything!”
“You’re not gay, Steve,” Robin told him confusedly.
“I’m half gay! It’s called bisexual, it’s when you like guys and girls. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you guys about it, I was still wrapping my head around it…”
“What, you’re serious? Steve, that’s not a thing. Bisexual is what people say they are when they’re so much of a slut they’ll go for anything.” Eddie said, shaking his head.
Steve looked to Robin, hoping to get some reassurance but only received a scathing look in response. “Being bisexual isn’t a thing, Steve. It’s just what people call it when they pretend and try to hurt the people that are actually gay. I can’t believe you would do that.”
“I wouldn’t! I’m serious, I like both guys and girls. I’m not trying to hurt you guys or be a manwhore. I really am attracted to both. I thought you guys would be more understanding,” Steve’s voice trailed off at the end in hurt. He never even fathomed the idea that they wouldn’t accept him. Their support had been guaranteed in his mind so now that he didn’t have it, he didn’t know what to do.
Eddie scoffed, “Steve, you’re just confused. You have to be either gay or straight, there’s no inbetween. And you’re the biggest ladies-man I know. You like girls.”
Steve sighed. He felt like his best friends were attacking him for no reason. He finally found his people, felt safe and loved by them, and then ruined everything by being honest. He couldn’t believe that the people he loved and trusted the most were rejecting him.
“I just told you that I like both. Yeah, I do like girls. I love them, I think they’re great. But I also like guys. I don’t know why you guys aren’t accepting that, especially after I accepted both of you but I think you should leave.”
“Steve-” Robin tried to speak but he cut her off.
“If you guys can’t accept me for being bi, I think you should leave,” he said sternly. To his complete and utter heartbreak, they each picked up their things and walked to the door without another word.
Robin turned around just enough to tell him, “Steve, you’re just confused. You’ll get over it eventually and when you do, give me a call.”
And with that, she closed the door behind her.
Steve didn’t even try to stifle the sobs as the ‘Sweet Transvestite’ song played in the background. He rewound the tape on autopilot, tears streaming down his cheeks all the while. He’d just lost two of his best friends, two people that he’d gone through everything with, just because he was a little too different.
With tears still streaking down his face and sobs wracking his frame, he made his way to the phone perched on the wall. He dialed the Wheeler’s number in a haze and only came back to himself when he heard Nancy’s voice filter through.
“Hello, Wheeler residence. This is Nancy.”
“Nance,” he said, barely decipherable through his tears. “I told Eddie and Robin that I was bisexual and they told me that it wasn’t a thing! They left and I don’t think we’re friends anymore! After everything we went through, they left because I like guys and girls. What is wrong with me, Nancy?”
“Are you serious? They left just like that? Steve, listen to me. Nothing is wrong with you and you are valid in your feelings. Honestly, if they can’t accept you then they don’t deserve you,” She told him seriously.
“Nance, I don’t care if they deserve me or not. They’re all I have. The kids come and go, my parents hate me, and Hopper checks in sometimes but I can tell he has better things to do. Robin and Eddie are the only friends that I have consistently. And you I guess. But if I lose them, I lose everything.” Another sob tore from his throat and even Nancy started to tear up on her end of the call.
“Steve, no matter what, you have me. I know that’s not good enough but I’ll always be here for you. I’m going to go talk to them and fix this. Just relax and maybe call Hopper or one of the kids to come over to check on you, okay? I’ll handle this,” she reassured him.
“Okay, thanks Nance.”
“Of course, what are friends for?” And then the line went dead.
~*~*~*~
Nancy was livid. She couldn’t believe that two members of the Party, two of Steve’s best friends that had been through the same shit as the rest of them, would be so intolerant over who someone else was attracted to. Seeing a giant flesh monster made out of melted humans and a vindictive man that could kill teenagers in their own minds were fine but Steve liking guys and girls was too much? Ridiculous.
As soon as she hung up the phone with Steve, she grabbed her car keys, a cardigan, and her gun then made her way to the Buckley house. Eddie’s van wasn’t parked in front of it so she made her way to the Munson trailer next. Both Robin and Eddie were sitting on the stoop of the trailer and only barely glanced up when she pulled in front of them.
“Um, hey Nance. Can we help you?” Eddie asked her disinterestedly. Although, he became much more interested, and afraid, when she pulled her pistol from her car.
“Get in the trailer.”
“Okay, we’re going. What’s with the gun?” He stammered. Both he and Robin bolted inside the trailer and Nancy quickly followed.
“Nancy, please. We didn’t do anything! Are you being controlled by Vecna or something because you’re pointing a gun at us and we don’t know why. You’re our friend! You don’t want to kill us! Is your favorite song still Girls Just Want To Have Fun by Cyndi Lauper? I don’t know all the words but between Eddie and I, we can probably bring you out of it. Just don’t shoot us!”
“It’s not so nice to be betrayed by your friends, now is it?” She lowered the gun enough for them to relax before she continued her crusade. “Steve called me in tears today because his best friends, the people he trusted to accept him, rejected him and tried to call him confused when he said he was bisexual. Do you even know how much that hurt him? He called me three weeks ago having a crisis because he realized he liked a guy and didn’t know he could. After I explained it several times and assured him that it was okay, I told him that you guys would accept him. Not only did you guys trample all over his feelings, you’re also making me look like a liar. And I am not a liar.”
“Nancy-”
“No, Eddie! When you and Robin came out to the Party, we accepted you. You were nervous and scared to tell us but we all accepted you because someone’s sexuality doesn’t change who they are as a person. Steve was just as nervous to tell you that he was bisexual and you ridiculed him. What if we had done that to you when you told us? Eddie, what if Dustin had laughed in your face and told you that you had to be confused? Robin, what if Max had yelled at you and said that lesbians didn’t even exist? Whatever you imagine that would’ve felt like, Steve is feeling it right now.”
Tears were dripping down Robin’s face and Eddie had paled several shades. Both of them were at a loss of what to do and neither one could find any words to say.
In turn, Nancy dealt the final blow. “The worst part is that the reason he figured out he was bi was Eddie. You were his bisexual awakening and then you ridiculed him for it. He feels awful now and I don’t know if he’ll forgive you guys for this.”
Eddie’s face paled even further and Robin brought a hand up to her lips in shock. Nancy just shook her head, tucked her gun into her waistband, and walked back to her car. She’d done what she came to do and now she had an ex-boyfriend to comfort.
Permanent Tag List: @doubleb11 @nburkhardt @zerokrox-blog @newtstabber @i-less-than-three-you @carlyv @pyrohonk @straight4joekeery @trippypancakes @conversesweetheart @estrellami-1 @suddenlyinlove @yikes-a-bee @swimmingbirdrunningrock @perseus-notjackson @anaibis @merricatty @maya-custodios-dionach @grtwdsmwhr @manda-panda-monium @lumoschild @goodolefashionedloverboi @mentallyundone @awkwardgravity1 @anzelsilver @jestyzesty @gregre369
687 notes
·
View notes
Augusnippets, Day One: Gaslighting
cw: manipulation, minor whump (he's 17 here)
for the @augusnippets challenge // wordcount: 419
=~=~=
“You holding up, champ?”
Benji pressed his back into the wall, hoping the cold concrete would clear his head. His palms stung from tumbling onto the asphalt while the crew made their escape. His new t-shirt—bought with his share from their last job—was ruined, tattered all down his back. His skin was cut up too, but he was trying not to think about it, letting the leftover adrenaline keep the pain at bay for a little while longer.
“Hey. Benny. You okay?”
He swallowed, managing a shallow nod.
“There we go. I knew you wouldn't let a little thing like this get to you. C'mon, let's get our act together.” Anya had her bag slung over her shoulder and was digging through it. Benji struggled to keep his eyes open.
“We… we're going back?”
“Of course we're going back. You wanna eat, don't you?”
Again, he nodded, trying to hold on to agreeance, though his mouth wouldn't cooperate. “But we almost got caught,” he blurted out. “W-we almost died.”
“No one 'almost died,'” Anya replied, a note of irritation creeping into her voice. “Look. The cops are busy chasing us, security’s distracted. No one's going to expect a second hit. If we don't go now—”
“Please,” Benji squeaked. “I… I don't think I can.”
Anya rubbed her face. “Damn it, Ruebin.”
His heart sank. Usually it was Benji or Benny. She only used his last name when she was annoyed with him.
“Why do you always have to do this?”
Always? He didn't always do this. He was just hesitant. Up until a few months ago, the biggest job he'd pulled was stealing the Rolex off a guy in a suit. This was high stakes.
“I don't…”
“You do,” Anya said. “Every run I've taken you on, you get scared and wanna back out.”
“Not every—”
“Every time.”
Was she right? Anya had been doing this for years. Maybe she saw something he didn't. When he didn't say anything else, she let out a sigh.
“I can't hold it against you. You're new. The rest of us aren't cowards, but that just means we aren't used to people who are.” She put a hand on his shoulder, giving him a gentle smile. “I know you can move past this, right? You're one of us.”
Benji nodded. “Yeah. Yeah, I'll... get better.”
“That's what I like to hear, Benny.” Anya slapped him on the back, and he tried not to wince at her enthusiasm.
“Now let's get back out there.”
22 notes
·
View notes