#“I'm telling Cat you said that.”
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lurafita · 10 months ago
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CEO!Magnus and personal chef/bodyguard!Alec
(There is every chance that I have posted this before, I just can't remember. I tried to search through my archive, but.... there is a lot of posts there, did you know? 🤣😂 Anyway, in case I'm making you read this twice, sorry. 😅)
Magnus being like this really big shot CEO who has meetings 24/7 and charity events and social appearances and all that other busy stuff going on. So he gets a personal chef to keep an eye on his nutrition. And Alec is ruthless when it comes to making sure Magnus eats healthy. Magnus: "You know I love your cooking, Darling, but how about a good old fashioned fast food break?" Alec: "All that grease is bad for you. Eat your carrots. You look pale. How much sleep did you get last night?" Magnus, innocently: "Enough?" Alec: "Unlikely. No more caffeine for you today."
Magnus trying to sneak all kinds of unheathy Snacks, and Alec foiling him at every turn. Magnus had an energy drink hidden away in his desk, but as he opens the drawer, there is a bottle of water with a note attatched with "stay hydrated".
Alec even convinced the close by Cafe to not serve Magnus anything with Caffeine, after Magnus' last doctors appointment showed high blood pressure.
Maybe Alec is some kind of ex-agent or ex-military, who got into cooking for an undercover op, but really enjoyed it and wanted to pursue it further when he quite the force.
When one of Alec’s old colluegues comes visiting him, Alec is crouching behind the entertainment system to find Magnus' latest snack hidey-hole. Alec: "He gets more creative every time. Some of the drug dealers we busted could have learned from him."
Bet you Magnus is the type of CEO who has a loyal Twitter following and he tweets about everything Alec cooks for him (and the things he doesn't let him eat.) The Internet already ships them.
Possible tweet: The_Magnificent_Bane: Thank you for the suggestion @randomfollower, but unfortunately Alexander didn’t go for the argument that carrot cake counts as a vegetable.
Why am I know picturing a fight in the kitchen where Alec uses kitchen utensils and food to knock out people who have come to kidnap Magnus
Imagine someone broke into Magnus' place, and the police are called and as they arrive Magnus is like: "Thank you for coming. My chef has already apprehended and restrained the perpetrators, and is waiting for you to take them off his hands in the living room." Police: "... Your cook apprehended them?" Magnus: "Yes. Sadly, the confrontation did not result in the death of that cursed celery he bought earlier."
Magnus: "Tomatoes can't be trusted, my darling. Are they a fruit? Are they a vegetable? No one knows." Alec: "They are fruits." Magnus: "That's what they want you to believe."
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electrozeistyking · 6 months ago
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I forgot to post this. Here's some silly art based on my friend @l-borden's playthrough of Voices of the Void. :3
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raticalshoez · 4 months ago
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i'm having hyperfixation drought so i did what i did best and created a crossover episode
#trafficblr#life series#hermitcraft#qsmp#the drought's been crazy i had to make qsmp x life series/hermitcraft you don't understand i literally had to#i literally cannot tag all of the cubitos without going over the limit so i'm gonna use them to rant about these doodles instead#when i tell you that i think dl!pearl would've loved tilín i'm telling you i think she would've LOVED them like.#something about just wanting to find love at every turn but feeling unwanted spdihgpisadhfpa. and also tilín's name is similar to tilly LOL#the jelly egg is just like if the double life jelly pandas were just an egg that scar loves with all his heart and grian reluctantly accept#i think out of all the duos in qsmp. the one i would want to see in the dl soumate premise the most is slimeriana. it's the dysfunctionalit#i made a post in the past about pac and tango being my fav cubitos bcs they were both crazy cartoonish and like scientists#but it kinda felt like a disservice to leave mike and zedaph out because to me they're argubly crazier and more cartoonish#missa and tim are paired bcs i just really wanted an excuse to draw the wet cats and it just so happened they both have relations to death#skizz and jaiden as the lawyers who were SHOCKINGLY good at their jobs like they cooked with that one#(was also gonna draw joe and roier as bad lawyers but i was running outta steam)#someone's already made a post about grian and (el) quackity and their eye entities so not much elaboration needed there#fit and etho just give the same vibe to be as a dude who has a reputation and is well-known and seems intimidating#i also made fit's arms way too skinny and i don't like it...but i'm not gonna go back and change it now i spent embarassingly long on this#but then his silliness is brought out by The Narrative#foolish and bdubs is one of my favorite drawings because i just knew i wanted to highlight the silly height difference#just realized they're also both god-like figures at least at some point#cellbit and rendog. cat and dog and lore. enough said about their connection.#i couldn't decide who fit etoiles combat hungry anime protagonist vibe best bcs martyn was originally paired with him#but i wanted martyn with phil so i went with my second options: joel and gem#i couldn't draw them mid rage but essentially the title is derived from “WHO KILLED EMPANADA” and “do me a favor. die for me.”#philza minecraft and martyn inthelittlewood. they feel like twins but one is evil (it's martyn)#SOMETHING I FORGOT THAT I WISH I ADDED: BBH AND BIGB AS THE ENTITIES WHO LIE. I HATE MYSELF HOW COULD I FORGET THAT#if i were to pair impulse with someone it would be tubbo? either him or scar would've been with tubbo#and then lizzie i just did not know who i wanted to pair her with. no one really does it like her in my opinion#scott's someone i also had no idea who to put him with he's just so...him...
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antisocialxconstruct · 11 months ago
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hatterofthelabyrinth · 2 months ago
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if Halloween can´t be celebrated there, then what do they celebrated there or is there no celebration? (i hope you understand my english, i speak spanish)
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There isn't any sort of celebration as far as I know of? I've passed houses and Lerkrims of people hosting parties and the like, but that's the closest I've seen. But no, I don't think anyone does holidays here. If they do, I haven't seen anyone celebrate it. Hey, maybe that'll be something someone can do. Set up a haunted house year round. Randomly go decorate. Make a halloween costume just for the sake of it. Seems like fun to me.
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uncanny-tranny · 2 years ago
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One thing I find weird about visibly transitioning is realizing that while you as a human haven't changed in regards to personality or what have you, people's perception of you has, and sometimes that means you'll be treated differently.
I've noticed that as I become more "visibly" male to people, they are much more willing to say that I am "aggressive". Oftentimes, I'm not even doing anything out of the ordinary, I'm acting like I always have, and to be honest, people don't say how I'm being aggressive. It's really jarring because I haven't changed - my personality is the same. But I think what has changed is the fact that I am read as male doing the things I always have, so I'm treated with that lack of nuance.
I bring this up because it's an aspect of transition that can be very difficult, and even dangerous. I wonder, if I'm being seen this way, how are other trans people being seen? These things are important to consider because it can compromise our safety
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faaun · 8 months ago
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a while ago i accidentally bent a g.pangolin electrode (those things are made of gold) the world was covered in conductive gel time is passing unreal lvls of quick they know my heart is yours
#a mark per line. i want to learn how to play the santoor linguistic communication is a two way process. candle dances like theres someone#burning in it. both listeners and speakers need to adjust for successful communication. give two examples of how listeners might adjust to#speakers. a quick rum picks you up. speakers assimilate. speakers adjust to mispronunciation. my cat is guarding the living room#my friend is stuck in abstraction hell. how might speakers adjust to listeners? laziness leads to permanent language changes and neonates#recognise the rhymes their mothers sang to them before birth. we know this because we have a way to quantify familiarity. i wonder if my#heart too would slow if i heard your voice . are you free on the 7th? i'd love it if youre there even for a little bit.#he said i dont know when ill see you again. ill see you whenever you want. i have an exam the next day and an event i'm not going to#full of beautiful monsters. shes taking her girls instead. shell be on her motorbike overclocked. from 7 hours to 9 days after#birth neonates can habituate to basic 2d shapes. i was in your living room in some latent space between solid and not. ive grown#complacent and overfilled and lazy in their warmth. my friends keep me alive and undervolted. too much sun to care for the important things#that arent you. she escapes to a small town with a book alone for meditation. she tells me she cuts fabric for the girls blood in their eye#i wish you never met my lips. shes back in lancaster. hes back from her cave full of velvet and rivers and sand#go on girl punch like you mean it#kick like i taught you.
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treesbian · 4 days ago
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hey general public. if someone is fostering your cats for you while you're between homes + you were unexpectedly homeless for like 3 weeks + you haven't been able to get to housing that will allow your pets to come with you yet, and you're in regular contact with that someone discussing those cats and paying for their care needs, and then that someone messages you saying they decided they're just going to keep your pets because they decided that's what's best for them, that's stealing, right? that's stealing? the general public of reasonable people in the world agree that that is theft? yes?
that's what these bitches did to my godsister fuck them!!! but they got threatened with criminal theft charges and handed them over ^_^ and my aunt already pressed trespassing charges on them lol. but when I texted them to yell at them about it they lied saying they never stole any cats but like. what they did was stealing. my mom had to take it all the way up to the police but I kind of don't feel bad because it was their own damn fault. I hope their lives aren't ruined forever but I do hope they learn what a consequence is
#talk tag#FUCK THESE BITCHES!!!!!!! FUCK EM TO HELL!!!!!#and i'm not convinced they weren't trying to kill my dogs either!! honestly!!#maybe they genuinely have no fucking foresight.#but they put cinder blocks behind the door in my dog's shelter so the door wouldn't open anymore#and that made it harder for my cousins who i hired as carers to actually go care for them#and they weren't even supposed to be on my aunt's property anymore anyway!!!!!#only reason they were ever supposed to go over there at all is bc originally we trusted them with the pet care while we were between homes#and we shouldn't have. they did an awful job and left all the animals in their own filth#they had my big sister's cat locked in a cramped carrier in her own filth for days!!!#and she was telling them to check on her and let her out but no#but since they were doing an awful job and the animals shelter got filthy bc they didn't bother with cleaning up#which was part of the pet care they were trusted with#they threatened to call animal control on us if we didn't fix it. i mean we did fix it but what the hell#we trusted you to care for them and you're threatening us for something YOU DID???#i mean we fixed it and fired them. my big sister's cat is fine now.#but we fired them and we told them to quit going over there. but they kept going over there#looking for the rest of my godsister's cats i guess 🙄 when they weren't welcome there my aunt never liked them#but they kept going over there!! and they blocked the entrance to my dogs' fully finished shelter with cinder blocks#and climbed out the window and said NOTHING to the people i actually entrusted their care to#and then 5 days later they called the humane society to my aunt's house.#if it was just to keep the wind from blowing open the door why not say something?#are you just that stupid?#do you lack that much foresight?#were you hoping my cousins wouldn't think of entering through the window?#the timing is just suspicious because if they couldn't get in there to care for them my dogs would've died of thirst at least#but they called the humane society to my aunt's house hoping to get us for animal neglect so they could keep the cats they stole i guess.#but they lied.#when the officer came out to my aunt's for the investigation he actually praised the set up we had. so.#and don't bring my fucking aunt and her animals into this fuck you!!!!
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daz4i · 1 year ago
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ik it's not good to latch onto a mental illness as your defining trait but also. babe i don't have much else going on or any other sense of identity beyond it
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spellmage · 27 days ago
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i hate my landlords so much
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pa-pa-plasma · 4 months ago
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kind of frustrating that people took "fat does not equal unhealthy" to mean "fat is not unhealthy." sometimes being obese IS unhealthy & excess fat can cause a lot of problems. ignoring health issues isn't progressive. real "oranges kill people with depression" moment
#i have a lot to say but i think it all boils down to this:#the only reason people think this way is because they experienced body shaming & bullying for their fatness#& instead of gaining a healthy relationship with their body & its needs they went full denial mode#people that aren't fat that think this way are just going with things uncritically which is also bad btw#because when you have decades of proof that being severely overweight can be detrimental to your health#(& no i don't mean fucking. supersize me. i mean medical proof that too much fat causes diseases & early death)#but you're ignoring that because a tiktok influencer that has no medical experience said so#that is a huge lack of critical thinking skills on display & people are gonna listen to that misinformation & some might die#this isn't some light shit that can be waved off as non-harmful because it IS harmful! it is actively hurting people!!#again being unhealthy isn't a moral failing & no one deserves shit for that!! but that's the whole damn point isn't it!!!#militant fat activists are so afraid of their fatness being associated with anything negative they turn right around into ableism#they don't WANT to be considered disabled! because being disabled IS a moral failing to them. disability is abnormal#& of course being morbidly obese is totally normal. because if it wasn't then they'd need to do work & handle an ED#& that's too much to grapple with mentally so. no. they're normal. super normal. don't look at the lifespan of someone over 300lb#btw i am 100% aware that a lot of this is combined with other issues like racism sexism homo/transphobia genuine fatphobia#but also sometimes they really can't operate on someone that can't recover afterwards#like i wouldn't call the vet bigoted & cat-hating for being unable to operate on my 20yo cat#Minnie would simply not survive that. because she is so damn old#unfortunately for Minnie she can't get younger but people CAN lose weight in multiple different ways#& it may seem like the world is attacking you but you really have to train yourself out of automatic bad faith reactions#''you couldn't possibly understand!!'' yeah okay i'm sooo abled & privileged you got me there (<-sarcasm. if you couldn't tell)#just because someone hasn't experienced your EXACT thing doesn't mean they can't relate & haven't gone through similar#it's so difficult to train your brain out of that shit i get that but you really really really have to. or you will die#or at least be miserable#DISCLAIMER: i'm not talking about every person who has even a little fat on their body. fat is NEEDED#but like all things too much of a good thing can cause problems & fat is not exempt#this is about morbid obesity. not someone who's like 160lb that shit is normal#& people need to stop thinking anything over 110lb is fat#because it isn't & i think most people are getting into unhealthy territory at that low of a weight#basically i view being too fat the same as being too thin. they both cause health problems & should be taken seriously
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bowsers-sweaty-asshole · 3 months ago
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thedeadestmeme · 1 year ago
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screeching and crying right now. i've really been out here seeing the aroace flag and thinking it's the c!tommy flag. please remove me from existance i'm so sorry
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blue-banditt · 5 months ago
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just find it funny how I found out ab my BPD (pre diagnosis). It wasn't because I had abandonment issues, it wasn't bc I had unstable relationships (although true), it wasn't bc of my self harm or validation seeking behavior; no
It was because I was having episodes where I was unbearably happy and joyful to the point of it being painful and needing to seek help bc I wanted it to stop. It was also because I was experiencing such severe dissociation that, beyond the daily disorientation dizziness foggy vision losing time forgetting things trapped in body feeling; I was having episodes where I was having mental breakdowns bc I felt like my memories weren't mine, my sentimental objects belonged to someone else and I was zapped into another person's life and body. And the gender dysphoria didn't help. It was so bad I genuinely can empathize with and understand how DID would feel, because the only thing that was missing for me was having a fractured identity and amnesia barriers.
BPD is fucking wild bro like forget abandonment issues what the fuck was I going through at 17
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misiahasahardname · 9 months ago
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i found a photo of me in the hospital after my first seizure and i am wearing the most HORRENDOUS combination of clothing imaginable 😭😭
thinking of redrawing it with mikey because epileptic 2012 mikey is real
#either that or i'll just redraw it as myself#i'm not gonna share the photo rn but like. god girl what were you thinking#a blue shirt with pink and yellow cats that's obviously too small for me#light grey pajama bottoms with pink cuffs(?)#ugly ass red socks with a white pattern or smth that look a bit like the psych ward socks#the nerdiest pair of glasses i've ever owned#and leapard print trainers 😭😭 (velcro because i didn’t know how to tie my shoes)#please get a better taste in fashion omg#my first seizure story is pretty funny to me tbh#i was at my desk at like 10pm colouring a pair of sunglasses red in honour of red nose day#(it was supposed to be part of my outfit for the next day because red nose day and pudsey day tended to be non uniform days)#and all of a sudden i wake up on the floor with a mild stomach ache#now i had had a lot of those and my parents began to not trust me when i said i felt sick#but this one was a bit worse than usual#so i started making whimpering sounds to make it beleivable#and my parents (who were in a bit of a panic) misinterpreted this and thought i was in too much pain to talk 😭😭#and i was so confused because i was just. lying on my bedroom floor as my parents ran about stressed saying shit ljke#“should we call them” which confused me further because#why are you already calling the school to tell them i'm gonna be absent??????#and then someone FINALLY explains to me i had a seizure and i'm like. oh.#i have a few other odd seizure stories#like when i had a seizure while playing othello#or while playing crazy 8s on gamepigeon with my friends#or when i had sent a status “coming back from the hospital” which scared my grandma but we assured her i was fine and healthy#and that it was just a checkup and everything was good and i hadn’t had a seizure in ages#and then i proceeded to have a seizure that night.#the irony is amazing#epilepsy: making my life interesting since 2018(?)#tw seizure mention#mia has a stupid thought
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best-fictional-cat · 2 years ago
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Look I voted Jayfeather already but it's a little uncomfortable that Bluestar canonically having paranoia in the last months of her life is being accepted as an argument against her. Like the series very much does explore this as the mental illness of an older, traumatized woman. (Well. In the Questionable way Warrior Cats explores any disability.) And like. The catalyst for this paranoid episode is her trusted deputy attempting to murder her.
Idk. This is maybe more serious than the Kitty Contest needs but weaponizing textual trauma and resulting mental illness is serious, you know? Saying all this assuming that other anon meant no harm and just didn't think about what they were saying, but that's kinda why I feel compelled to point it out. Real people have paranoia. They're not bad people, and they're not lesser for having it.
A very important addition to the debate
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