#‘why does he call YOU dr. but not me? I may not have as many doctorates as you but I am still a doctor. he should address me as such.’

[confused-wanderer]

The villains are utterly confused.

They remember the first robin. They remember how bloodthirsty the little gremlin was, how he appeared out of the darkness with a “HIYA FOLKS” that gave people near heart attacks with PTSD so bad they flinched everytime they walked into a dark corner. They remember his grin, baring few too many teeth with a glint in his eyes whenever the bat wasn’t around to curb him. They remember the death stare, the brooding that made no one doubt this was the Bat’s son. They remember how a punch would land a lot harder than it was supposed to, or the screaming that followed. Oh they remembered him alright.

The second one thank the stars was better. The second robin was giggly. He would hop around town, offering his help to everyone who needed it. Sure he was rough with abusers but hell no one cared about them. Matter of fact, the villains were glad because those assholes deserved no sympathy. They remember his puns, his wonder, his innocence and his spark. They remembered his laughter, his concern - the kind that only comes from one who’s been on the streets. This one was better, and the villains thanked their lucky stars. They remembered him alright.

But now, as the years passed and new characters emerged, the crime city saw the rise of two characters - a sunshine happy nightwing and a ready to kill red hood. And naturally, from their experiences in the past, the villains ended up making an honest mistake that ruined the two vigilantes’ reputation:

The villains assumed the first robin was Red Hood and the other was Nightwing. And BY GOD Gotham has not seen unhinged chaos like this.

SCENE 1

Red Hood *drawing his pistol* : Please, reach for your weapon. I’m itching for an excuse for my intrusive thoughts to become extrusive.

Two-Face: You dare mock me little bird?! Well.. I may not have my weapon.. but I have something I know you’d like..

Red Hood: Oh yeah?What’s that?

Two-Face: TAKE THIS! *slams button and coconuts start falling from the sky, all cracking and spilling as they hit the ground*

Red Hood:

Two-Face:

Red Hood: .. the fuck was that supposed to do?

Two-Face: .. HOW ARE YOU STILL STANDING?! YOU HATE COCONUTS ROBIN!!

Red Hood: The fuck- .. wait did you call me robin?

Two-Face *grins* : Yea.. robin. The first one. Thought I didn’t notice?

Red Hood: The first one? Does this *gestures vaguely to himself and his weapons* seem like something the first robin would do?

Two-Face:

Goon 1: I mean.. yeah

Red Hood: What! The first robin was nice!

Goon 2 *guffawing*: I beg your fucking pardon??

Two-Face: .. you took my coin and attached a magnet beneath it so everytime I flipped it it wouldn’t stop spinning. Do you know how long that took me to figure out?? Do you know how insane it drove me?? Joker had to help me out of pity. OUT. OF. PITY.

Red Hood:

Goon 1: ..Also you did steal some of our bones

Red Hood: hedidfuckingwhatnow-

SCENE 2

Nightwing: Hey there buddy! You look frostyl!

Dr. Freeze: Aha! You are too late to stop me robin!

Nightwing: .. robin?

Dr. Freeze: why yes! Don’t act coy, I know it’s you there. Now that we’ve got that clear.. I was wondering if you remembered all those years ago when you gave me a source for electricity to power a hospital keeping my Nora?

Nightwing:

Dr. Freeze: well you weren’t careful enough and never told me how much I could take from it.. so I used it to power so many of my inventions that came after

Nightwing *remembering when Jason was robin and every damn time he came to visit Wayne Manor his room would always run out power and the countless cold showers in freezing winters he had to take because of it*: .. oh? Well, sorry to break your bubble, but that wasn’t me Elsa.

Dr. Freeze: no? You joke around, make puns and I’m supposed to believe it’s NOT you?. The first one brooded like there was no tomorrow. He pissed me off so bad once I overheard him saying his favourite ice cream flavour and I made sure it wouldn’t be available in Gotham for YEARS. You’re not as bad as the first one. I’d remember if you were him.

Nightwing:

Nightwing *firing up his escrima sticks to maximum voltage*: Oh let me jog your memory then :)

[empty-vessel-of-a-person]

Rough Relationship Timeline with Zayne based on his Memories

This is just my observation. Not All Memories are included. May Contain Spoilers for those who just started the game. I maybe wrong in some parts as nothing on this blog is confirmed by Infold PTE LTD.

Pre - Relationship Stage

Sweet Conspiracy

The awkwardness is a bit heavy here. They still do not know how to talk to each other and M/C learning about Zayne having a sweet tooth.

She doesn't know how to return his jacket but does not want to leave it at the hospital's reception. Probably a good choice. Who knows? Some nurse might just stole that jacket away. ;)

M/C knows he is in a medical conference but doesn't know when he'll be back. So they are not communicating well yet. Maybe just a few convo here and there when she's in for check up.

But my favorite part is when M/C indirectly say that she wants to see Zayne outside of the hospital by saying "You'll call me so I can get my candies back when I'm free.. And we'll see each other again"

This memory clearly shows who M/C is really interested to. She wants to see him again and even if it's awkward with him when they just saw each other again, she is clearly interested.

Glittering Lights

Zayne's paying attention to M/C's emotion and monitoring her in Social media. This thought alone clearly shows that Zayne is already particularly keeping an eye on her since they met again in the hospital.

They are also not fully acquitted yet which is why M/C is quite unsure to start conversations with him. But it shows how Zayne is trying to learn little things about her. He is not yet familiar with what she likes hence him asking her americano or latte.

They have a connection. When they are trying to find each other when they got separated during Zayne's sudden phone call, even M/C felt it. It's like they both felt that they are looking for each other and their eyes met.

And the most obvious clue that they are not yet an item, is that awkward goodbye wave. But it's cute because they are expecting more.

Gentle Twilight

This was the first time Zayne ask M/C to go with him as a mutual support agreement in doing things to make them relax. Why I think so? They never expect to see each other in the library and when he thinks M/C is going to refuse hiking with him, he grabs a book about medicine to ensure that she will come with him.

They still not keeping tabs on each other directly.

M/C calling Zayne as "Dr. Zayne" seems professional rather than teasing.

Please remember hiking and pottery lessons.

Neon Nights

She refers to Zayne as a friend and they just keep bumping to each other.

Zayne is clearly jealous that M/C buying a gift for someone. He's actually quite bitter.. hehehehe

Isn't it amazing that even they disagree and not in a relationship at this time, they are perfectly in sync and fight wonderfully together. Which is why they are great together.

Delicacy

Well M/C thinking Zayne needs to correct his classmates when they said she is his girlfriend.

They are already more acquitted in this as they already agreed on meeting up and they are learning new and more things about each other.

M/C is also picking up Zayne's habits and likes as she know he likes the food there.

Zayne is comfortable in introducing her already.

Zayne's also indirectly confess to her here. (I want to strangle Astra if you know what I mean!)

In a Relationship Stage

Tranquil Heart

This may not be a solid proof, but I think they started their relationship right after this memory.

Although it came out as a friendly banter between them, Zayne is clearly upset that he was not taking care of herself more. Not to mention being caught sneaking out at the hospital at the dead of the night.

But this is where the last line of the memory played out for the start of their relationship. Zayne again indirectly confess to her by saying "That he can't ignore you even if he wants to."

This line is so strong in so many levels. 1, it can imply on Foreseer seeing M/C again. He has a choice to either move on from her but he chose to stay and dedicate his life for her.

2 if he made a promise to her as a kid, it is forgivable if he forgot to help her with her sickness. But from then on he just simply existed for her. I still got chills thinking of what have Zayne must have felt when he first hug and kiss M/C.

Tranquil Moment

I think this is their early relationship stage because M/C is more familiar with Zayne's schedule now and she is seeing him to have dinner dates.

They are planning a dates and doing small things like making snow man and watching the snow. This simple things are one of the sweetest things as they mark the beginning of their relationship.

Drunken Intimacy/ Exclusive Tutorial

He is bringing her to events and showing her to classmates and colleagues. He is definitely showing her off and proud of her being a hunter.

He is being territorial. He warns M/C not to visit other doctors and keep close to her when someone wants to talk to her.

Spring Remnants

They are doing charity events together.

Notice how Zayne takes the box from M/C? This is not just him being gentleman because the next thing he say is "Allow me" referring to taking the box from her and the "Go register first" meaning M/C and Zayne are close enough for M/C knowing his details.

Zayne holding her hands.

At the end, Zayne says "Let's enjoy Spring together from now on" indicating they indeed start dating and Zayne wanting for them celebrate spring as a couple moving forward.

Starry Nocturne

I usually refrain from talking about this memory. Not only of it's heavy emotional content, but I can clearly feel the exhaustion and fear from Zayne.

If observe closely, you can see how they understand each other without a word. Zayne just looks at M/C and she already understood. The gesture is so intimate yet so wholesome.

They way they understood each other and the way she comforts him. M/C might have know that the exhaustion and fear comes with the thought of her in his mind.

Its given that they are already together but Zayne is still in a race against time. He might be busy with patients but all this effort as we know is to find a permanent cure for M/C. He works tirelessly for her. To not lose her again. And this brings me to one of the things that may be difficult to swallow for everyone.

While Xavier and Rafayel are still tied to their memory of M/C in their previous lifetime, Zayne is the only one leaving the past behind, embracing the present, and was fighting for a future with M/C. Words are not enough to express how deep and far his love could go and this is exactly why I love Zayne so much.

The Next Level Stage

Ramblings Come True

AGAIN, Although I cannot say this is a solid evidence, but when Zayne says "I was... referring to something you wouldn't regret" It was like he is asking for her if she is ready to take their relationship to the next stage and she agree by saying when she gets better. (M/C have a cold)

Fleeting Sweetness/Cozy Afternoon

M/C was able to enter Zayne's home while he was sleeping. Meaning she already have the keys to his home solidifying the fact that they are indeed in a relationship. I know mostly Japanese are more symbolic at this its like giving someone more

They are sleeping on the same bed on his house or at her place. M/C buying him him a pajama set.

They instinctively and freely touching each other. Be it holding hands or hugging.

Lingering Warmth/End of Depth/Heartstring Symphony/Business Trip/Snowy Serenity/Hidden Motive.

Do I actually need to explain this? hehehehe It's really obvious so I'll leave it there.

Final Thoughts

Zayne and M/C have a steady and strong bond when it comes to relationship. They might have tiptoed around it by not saying a direct "I Love You", but they live and breath for each other.

Isn't cute that they find a way to saying their true feelings by saying "The Moon is Beautiful"?

Thank you Infold for bring Zayne to us. If may just a game for other, but Zayne is my comfort zone. Having him is like having something that will be forever consistent in my life.

[lune-redd]

Hello, it's Lelly.

As you may know, I have recently deactivated my Twitter account. A lot of people are speculating I left because I was being harassed for drawing my older depiction of Bubbles from The Powerpuff Girls as chubby. However... that's not the direct reason I left. In fact, I didn't really see much of the comments of folks on there getting riled up about it as I muted the tweet the morning I saw that it blew up. I was only merely aware of it all by being told about it from friends, with there being some other users on the site making other really fuckin' stupid comments about my art.

This does however lead into why I actually left Twitter, and it's because of Twitter's overall toxic nature. Overtime, I've really gotten sick of how absolutely revolting Twitter has become to experience. The site is basically built around dunk culture and doom scrolling. You know that one tweet of someone making an example of Twitter's utter stupidity by using pancakes and waffles as an example?

I bring this up because I think this fits my point about how Twitter has this thing of assuming the absolute worst about the most insignificant things, even the most innocuous. The "Bubbles obesity" comments weren't the only stupid comments that came out of that post. I also got a quote retweet that I was "forcefully feminizing Buttercup", even though the whole fucking point of that drawing was to depict a usually tough character in an unusual situation for her. I have also gotten stupid comments on other drawings though, like the one where Mitch pushes Buttercup down for trying to look taller than she is and I got called a misogynist for it, though I'm pretty sure that one was bait (Twitter users have a tough time figuring out what is and isn't bait, it's dunk culture that I'm about to talk about really doesn't help this).

The site's dunk culture is also really fuckin' bad. Quote retweets are a disease, as unlike Tumblr's reblog comments, quote retweets count as a different post. Someone disagrees with you? Show your audience how stupid they are on your page! Hey, are you trying not to see the most abhorrent racist statement imaginable? Well TOO BAD FUCK YOU here's a le epic own giving them all the attention in the world even though one of the most common internet rules are DON'T FEED THE FUCKIN' TROLLS YOU IDIOT. Oh hey, are you trying to explain how you prefer a certain artistic choice over another in something you like? Well you're a deranged ungrateful whiny nitpicker, get owned!

I've seen so many of my friends be belittled for simply discussing their artistic preferences of things they're passionate about. I had a friend who said he prefers the original Crash Bandicoot design over his redesigned look in Crash 4, and had legitimate reasons for why he felt that way (even if he didn't really explain them clearly), and he got dunked for it which made me mad. I'm sick and tired of it all. The reaction to my art is only a mere example of the shit I despise about that site.

I had been planning on leaving Twitter for quite some time, as my follower count was growing nearer and nearer to 10K. I had planned on leaving after 10K followers because that amount was wayyyy too fuckin big for me to handle. I'm a young and growing lad, and I felt it wouldn't be good for my mental sanity to handle all that, so I dipped. The amount of attention I've been getting is simultaneously both wonderful and extremely overwhelming. Even the explosion of new followers and asks on here is quite the load! (Seriously, calm the fuck down y'all) I am very grateful for all the supportive asks I've gotten even though I won't be able to answer them all, thank you all so very much.

tl;dr I didn't leave Twitter because I was being harassed or anything, but rather because of the site's overall toxic and belittling environment.

Adios.

-Lelly

[griffonsgrove]

General Dating Headcanons | Black Hat

Black Hat X Reader fandom: Villainous/Villainos words: 1132 cw: none!! enjoy! a/n: Hi hi!! ive really been wanting to do headcanons for Black Hat for a while, I'm open to asks and requests so dont be afraid to drop a suggestion in!!

(Platonic):

Black hat is by no means an easy boss. He’s ruthless, unmerciful and bitter, and you are no exception in the Eldrich’s case.

At first.

When you were first hired to be an employee at Black Hat Organization, Black Hat treats you as he would any of his other employees.

With zero respect.

He has very little tolerance for inefficiency

But you were absolutely determined to live up to his impossible expectations.

Maybe you spent a little extra time organizing his paperwork, or added a smidge more arsenic to his tea than usual (he had a sweet tooth for poison occasionally) and maybe you even bothered to dust some of his prized artifacts and tomes from his glory days as villain, making them look as new as the day he got them, and so many other things you did that seemed to make his life a little bit more stress-free.

At first, he thought nothing of it, it wasn't uncommon that his henchmen would grovel at his feet and suck up to him, it amused him really. 

But overtime the eldritch realizes that you wanted to do these little tasks. 

But why?? He was the most feared being in existence, and you went out of your way to do the smallest task to appease him. You seemed to worm your way into his thoughts, even as he sat perched at his desk in the wee hours of the night. Why were you just so…sweet! You should be cowering in fear!!

Speaking of fear, he loooooooves to scare the shit out of you, popping up when you least expect, out of the shadows, morphing into some unspeakable abomination of eyes and mouths (possibly) scarring you, always got a kick out of him.

After working for him for some time you were the only one, he seemed to tolerate, you managed to do your job with little to no flaw or mistake, unlike his scientist.

Dr. Flug admittedly was slightly envious.

He’d never admit it but, Black Hat enjoys holding conversation with you from time to time. He allows you to ask questions, most of them being about all the things he had witnessed and accomplished in the eons he’s been alive. He almost admired the way your eyes lit up in wonder as he explained. Almost.

You enjoyed these little private conversations too, occasionally the demon would ask a question or two about yourself, which you would happily answer. He may show no interest on the outside, but on the inside he's curious. Something he rarely feels.

He does have a reputation to uphold however, and still threatens, yells and demeans you just as he would any of his other employees.

Gotta keep you on your toes, ya know? 

But deep down you know. You know that he secretly enjoys your company and is too stubborn to actually admit it.

You even dare to go as far and say that he was a friend. Don't let him hear you say that though.

(Romantic):

hooo boy

When I say this man is conflicted

The mere thought of love made Black Hat’s face morph into an ugly scowl, something he thought was near impossible for him to ever experience. The man had no heart for goodness's sake!

Oh, but then you had to weasel yourself into his life, his home, with your sweetness, didn't you?

Let me be clear when I say that this old man has never experienced these kinds of feelings before in his lifetime, and when he does, he thinks he’s possibly dying.

Did I also mention dramatic??

When realization dawns on him, he is absolutely floored, and the first thing he does is avoid you like the plague, which confuses you and raises a bit of concern. He rarely calls you to his office, and when he does, he avoids eye contact or just faces away from you entirely, barely acknowledging your presence.

Definitely becomes moodier, and more irritable as his feelings fester.

It’s not until you confront him one evening, when the manor is still and quiet, everyone having retreated to their respective rooms hours ago. That he finally confesses.

And being the extremely old fashioned eldritch he is, he formally asks to court you, how could you deny such a tempting proposition from the lord himself??

Of course, you say yes, why wouldn't you?? It’s an honor to be courted by Lord Black Hat!

Surprisingly, nothing changes much at first, he’s still very new to these feelings.

You both come to the agreement to keep your courtship strictly private and away from prying eyes, as I’ve said the man has a reputation to uphold.

God forbid Demencia finds out either. 

With all that being said, you both take things very slowly, which thankfully you were patient and understanding about, he's experiencing all these things for the first time.

It’s a good thing you're there to help guide him, right?

He may not have ever been in a relationship, but he isn't stupid. This demon is a straight up gentleman, and extremely chivalrous. Call it old-fashioned if you must, But the man is a charmer.

Despite his villainous persona, Black Hat shows rare moments of unexpected softness when he's alone with you.

He might not admit it, but he secretly enjoys quiet evenings, perhaps reading or just spending time together in one of his private studies. He personally enjoys reading the Necronomicon to you.

Black hat also has an uncanny ability to find and present unique, often mysterious gifts. They might be rare artifacts, darkly enchanted trinkets, or even personalized items that reflect his understanding of your tastes. You keep every single one of them.

He’s surprisingly a good listener and remembers just about anything you tell him.

Which by the way, this man spoils you.

When it comes to dates, Black Hat goes all out. He arranges extravagant, exclusive events, whether it's a candlelit dinner on a rooftop or a private screening at the manor. 

He once brought you to another dimension to view the downfall of an alien civilization, how romantic!

Black Hat, in his own twisted way, is fiercely protective over you. He might not show it overtly, but anyone who dares to even look at you with disdain will face the Eldrich’s fiery wrath.

Overall, Black Hat is surprisingly a good lover and partner. Your life never seems to be dull with him around, and you're incredulously grateful and honored to be able to see this side of him, even if it's behind closed doors. He has a hard time conveying his feelings and being vulnerable, but you're patient and understanding and eager to help guide him.

He never would have thought love was possible for him until you came along.

[lizzybeeee]

The Lucanis vs Illario story would have had greater emotional depth/intrigue if the writers didn't water down how fucked up the Crows are as an organization.

Just some thoughts about how, out of all the side villains, Illario had some great potential to be a really interesting/tragic character in my opinion.

TL;DR: Zevran Aranai has a knife with Caterina's name on it for good reason and Lucanis/Illario need therapy...or whatever the Thedas equivalent is called...talking to Rook, I dunno

Going into DATV as a new player, or even as a returning one, the whitewashing of the Crows has a lot of the potential complexities of that life simply ignored or barely touched upon. The entire 'Illario vs Lucanis' boils down to: Illario seething in the shadows about Lucanis being the 'best boy'™ of the family while Illario is an after thought - which he is.

Let's be real, Illario is not subtle and immediately comes across as the Scar to Lucanis' 'Mufasa'. It's a questline with a very straightforward villain who has pretty lackluster motivations from what info we're provided - being 'I want power and to be the First Talon'. The game does very little explore what motivations he may have beyond being jealous of Lucanis/wanting more power.

However, if you play the quest line knowing what previous games have set up about the Crows - about how cutthroat and brutal the life is behind the glamour - then you can see that the entire Lucanis vs Illario conflict has amazing potential to be a dramatic tragedy.

We've seen how the life of Crow can affect Zevran - someone who was sold into the life through child-slavery. How interesting would it be to see how the life of a Crow can affect someone who was born into it? It's pretty clear in-game that Caterina intends for her grandchildren to carry on the family tradition - despite the fact that this 'family tradition' has likely led to the deaths of most of her grandchildren and however many children she had.

If there's banter about how Illario's/Lucanis' parents/cousins died specifically I haven't heard it, but the impression I got in-game was that it was likely linked to the Crows/politics in some way? Feel free to correct me! Still majorly fucked up that she pushes her grandsons into this life regardless!

Lucanis/Illario's situation was not like Zevran's - who was sold into the Crow's through slavery, with no one to speak up for him. Caterina was a woman who had power, who knew what the life of a Crow meant, and who still pushed those she 'loved' into it because is consolidated her place in the system. For all the Crows talk of 'family' Caterina doesn't seem to give a shit about them unless if they're contributing to the family business in some way - not to mention the whole 'you fail and we kill you' clause of being a Crow in the first place.

In the 'Wigmaker Job' from Tevinter Nights Lucanis talks about how Caterina hit him [also Illario] with her cane for mistakes and had him spend days without food/water. How he used to hate her but now 'realizes' that it was her way of ensuring he survived the life of being an Antivan Crow. Did it end up protecting them? It likely pushed them both to refine their skills out of fear. It's likely that simply by association with her they would be targets and thus needed to know how to take care of themselves and fight.

But why have him as a Crow in the first place? Why not simply train them well to defend themselves? You can't deny that she doesn't benefit from having her grandchildren in the family business - intentionally wanting Lucanis to take over her position as First Talon. The Antivan Crows are a force to be reckoned with and being one brings a whole lot of power in Antiva - being part of the elite of that group even more so.

If the game showed us the ugly reality of the Crows - the brutality of the lifestyle and how cutthroat the organization is, it could have really added some depth to Illario's betrayal - having it be more than "I want more power/respect" to "this is the result of what you taught me was valuable in life."

Warden: "Do you actually enjoy being an assassin?" Zevran: "And why not? There are many things to enjoy about being a Crow in Antiva. You are respected. You are feared. The authorities go out of their way to overlook your trespasses. Even the rewards are nothing to turn your nose up at."

Illario, bitter about Caterina favoring Lucanis - resentful of the fact that she has already decided that Lucanis will be her successor, being offered power by the Venatori (at the expense of the Crows) and accepting because why not? How different is it from what the Crows do? Isn't power and status the whole point of working yourself up in the Crows? Getting into a relationship with Zara because why not? Isn't sex part of the allure of being a Crow? Why can't he have this? Why shouldn't he have this?

Rook: "When we met, it didn't seem like Illario and Caterina were close." Lucanis: "It was hard to be close to her. Even for me. And...I was her favorite."

Why would he have connections to his family? Why should he? Caterina certainly never seemed to value 'family' beyond what they could do for her and their family legacy. Most of his family is already dead, and of those that remain the only parental figure he has obviously favors Lucanis. We don't have a lot of evidence in-game to show that Illario ever really cared for Lucanis, but the prequel story 'The Wake' and Lucanis' own banter imply that they were practically brothers, best friends. Perhaps he did care and then ceased to at some point, perhaps he didn't at all, or perhaps he accepted that an early death for them both was inevitable like everyone else in their family. Dead now or later - what was the difference? At least if Illario sells him out now to the Venatori then he'll get something from it instead of another dead family member to bury.

It's the tragic result of raising a child in an environment where he was taught and experienced the need for self-preservation at all costs. Constantly threatened, punished, and made well aware of that fact that his life was an expendable commodity. Then, when things in the world went to shit he picked the only option that made sense to him. To save himself.

The irony of the potential fall of the Crows, the fall of House Dellamorte, coming at the hands of one of their own - not because he had a change of heart but because he was taught too well by them. The Crows view those that fail them as disposable, someone to be discarded - if the Crows fail Illario, what is to stop him from applying that mindset to them?

But this would require the writers to acknowledge how messed up the Crows are and we can't do that to our 'Noble Freedom Fighters'™. They'll also need to address Zevran's existence and what lore was established in past games...and we can't have that either lmao.

[my-head-is-an-animal]

The Climb

Summary: You're a scientist, an engineer to be exact. Called to a meeting you had no real right to be at, Optimus Prime takes an exclusive interest in you, but you can't help but ask yourself at every turn, Why?

Rating: 18+ 🌹🩸🍆

Story Masterlist

Chapter 18

Optimus was talking to Ironhide when he felt something within his chest.

     ‘Optimus?’ Ironhide said, with an unusual amount of concern.

     ‘Jane?’ The great Prime felt his knees weaken, like something was being forced into him. He closed his eyes and allowed himself to be open to it.

     To humans it would simply look like lines of code, but to Optimus, everything was clear. Jane was dying.

     ‘What can I do?’ Optimus asked, already feeling the pain of losing her.

     The code ran in front of his eyes, his Spark was communicating with him. It needed information… about…?

     Optimus opened his eyes and felt the panic begin to overtake him. ‘I know what I must do.’ He said and strode towards Jane’s old office where Theo was working and still upset with him.

     ‘Theo.’ Optimus said, kneeling down to talk to him. ‘I must speak with you.’

     ‘What could you possibly have to say to me?’ Theo spat.

     ‘Jane needs our help.’ He said. ‘Her Spark does not know how to keep her alive, at the moment your machines are doing the work for it, but it needs to understand how to do it alone.’

     ‘So then send a message, transmit it, or whatever it is you do when you talk to her.’ Theo went to walk away from Optimus.

     ‘I talk to her the same way you do.’ His deep voice echoing off the walls of the large lab space. ‘I cannot simply walk into Janes dreams and talk to her as you believe I do. I speak to her when she sleeps in the same manner as you. I am not as privileged as you may think.’

     Theo paused for a moment, he really did believe that Optimus could communicate with his best friend in ways that he couldn’t. But Optimus needed to make clear that in this case he was nothing more than a bystander.

     ‘How can we help her then?’ Theo asked, his voice shaking as he did.

     ‘Her Spark does not understand how a human heart operates, we must teach it.’

     ‘How?’

     ‘I suspect you humans have many collections of written works on the subject. If you read them aloud, the Spark will hear it.’ Optimus explained. ‘It has learned enough from Janes brain waves to access her auditory functions.’

     ‘It’ll be like offering information for it to download?’

     ‘Exactly.’ Optimus nodded. ‘All this time we have been giving the Spark information it cannot use to save Janes life, it is capable of remembering everything it sees and hears, so now we must provide something more useful if Jane is to survive.’

     Theo barely listened to the rest of what Optimus had to say, he’d already gone about stripping his lab coat off and searching his bookshelf.

     ‘I don’t have anything here.’ He said, annoyed. ‘We’ll have to talk to Dr Hanley, she can get the information we need.’

     Optimus presumed that was the doctor who was keeping your recovery going, the one he’d spoken to a few nights before, he should have asked her name.

     Theo rushed out of the lab and towards the hospital, seemingly not caring that Optimus couldn’t follow him. He just wanted to save his friend.

     Optimus could Lennox and Smith arguing once again across the base. He decided it was best to return to the Autobot hanger while things calmed down.

For days Dr Hanley, Theo and even Lennox read to Jane, giving her Spark all the information they could on how the human body worked. Eventually Optimus began reading as well, if he was to spend the rest of his life with her, he needed to understand more than her mind.

     Optimus realised in all his desperation and need, he was now in union with someone of an entirely different species and that meant certain things would not come easy or natural to him. Custom and culture was one thing, but anatomy was another thing entirely.

     He tried to ignore the looks he would sometimes get from Ratchet, the one that told him the gravity of his choice was yet to be revealed, but instead he focused on anything positive he could.

     Once Jane was awake, things might have been easier.

     After a week, progress was finally being made. Dr Hanley was able to take away one of the machines keeping Jane alive. Optimus didn’t understand which one or what it did exactly, but she had been strapped into so many that, to him, it barely made a difference.

     ‘This is a good thing, Optimus.’ Dr Hanley told him one evening when he visited Jane. ‘It means she’s healing and your Spark is starting to learn more about what she needs. We’ve still got a long way to go, but things are looking up.’

     Optimus looked over Jane’s body, noting just how fragile it looked, how broken she must have felt when she fell. It broke him.

     ‘Thank you, Dr Hanley.’ He wasn’t sure what else to say.

     Dr Hanley gave him a sympathetic smile and left him with Jane for the night.

     ‘Jane.’ Optimus spoke quietly, his voice reaching a depth that would tell anyone of the pain he was feeling. ‘I wish you could tell me what it is you need. I feel… powerless.’ Optimus looked down, feeling the shame of his admission. ‘I do not know how long it will take for you to wake up, and I worry for your friends.’

     His eyes grazed over her room, observing the machines keeping her alive. She was so thin now, all the muscle she’d built up for the climb had begun to wither and her face was gaunt in a way he’d never seen in any human before.

     Dr Hanley kept assuring him that this was normal and as soon as she woke up, she would be able to regain her strength again, but for now, maintaining the essential organs her body needed was far more important.

     ‘I fear I have made a terrible mistake.’ Optimus’s voice shook. ‘I fear I have caused you more pain and you will awaken feeling hatred for me.’ He leaned forward a little more. ‘I would understand your feeling and not blame you in the slightest, but I have come to understand that perhaps my emotions got the better of me. Perhaps… I should have allowed you peace instead of this…’ Optimus was struggling to keep himself. ‘Until you give me a sign, I will continue with your request to offer information to your Spark, but Jane… please… come back to me soon.’

     Optimus took a moment to compose himself, Jane was the only one he felt he could falter in his bravery with, the only one who could understand his doubts and worries, and not think him weak. But he had made a promise, he would help until she gave him a sign that it either was or wasn’t working. He owed her that much for saving the world.

If you liked this, please consider supporting me ☕ thanks for reading!

[t-horn-n]

— clean up crew

PAIRING: miguel o’hara x reader (gender-neutral)

GENRE: hurt/comfort

SUMMARY: he thinks that you take too many risks on missions.  you think he’s a hypocrite.

“I don’t think you’re listening to me, Miguel,” you berate.

Your anger feels like a vat of boiling water beneath your rib cage.

“No, you’re not listening to me,” Miguel retorts.  “If you were, we wouldn’t still be talking about this, thirty minutes later.”  His voice sounds pinched and low.  

It’s at times like these that you think it would be much more simple if you just hated him.  If you could take all of the things you felt about Miguel O’Hara and exchange them for that single-minded five letter word.

“You’re only listening to me enough to argue with me,” you insist.

“But how many times have we fought about this, querida?  You’re always the one to start it.”  

You stand between him and the door to his office in the Spider-Society’s headquarters, so he focuses on a holographic dot map of reported anomalies.  He never likes to sit still when you fight.  At work, he pretends to swipe through reports or analyze charts.  At home, he’ll get up to fix himself a mug of decaffeinated coffee or clean the dishes in the sink or fold the laundry you left on the kitchen table.  You’re often arguing with his back.  You try very hard not to resent that, or rather, not to resent him.

“I would drop it if you would just listen to me.”  It’s mortifying that your voice shakes when you’re angry.

He thinks that you take too many risks on missions.  You think he’s a hypocrite.

“I have,” he says, exasperated.  “But this is the third time this month that you’ve gotten injured—”

“Bruises don’t count, Miguel.”

“Let me finish,” he warns.  “You sprained your wrist two weeks ago.  The month before that you pulled a muscle in your neck.  In May you dislocated your shoulder.  Last year you were out for three months when you fractured your collarbone.  You throw yourself around like you’re unbreakable.” 

“Oh yeah?” you hiss.  “What about you?  You flung yourself into that collapsing building on Tuesday.” 

“And you notice that I am unhurt.” 

“Right.”  You roll your eyes.  “Because you’re just so perfect, boss.  The strongest.  The smartest.”

His shoulders tense. 

“I’m worried that one day you’ll break and they won’t be able to fix you,” he tells you.  “If I did what was good for you, I’d send you to the clean up crew.” 

Your face heats.  That’s mean, you both know it.  It makes you want to be meaner.

“Oh, because you always know what’s best for everyone?  Honey, don’t you think you’ve let all this power go to your head?” 

“No, I—”

“‘Clean up crew.’  Sometimes you’re such a goddamn asshole, Miguel.  Remember when that Vulture got away on Earth-1014 and totaled a neighborhood because the team was across town taking care of a bank robbery?  That was your call.  And when Hobie broke his arm?  That was thanks to your directions.  The reason why—”

As if you were doused with ice water, you stopped talking.

“Go on,” Miguel says, but it’s more tragic than heated.  When he looks at you, his eyes are glassy.

You clench your fists such that you can feel the prick of your fingernails against your palm.  

Clean up crew.  God.  

“I’m done with this conversation.”  And then you’re out the door.

He’s already at home sitting at the kitchen island when you open the door.  Something anxious has been festering beneath your skin for the past three hours and it’s still there, simmering, as you kick off your shoes, taking your time to put them on the shoe rack.  Then you grab a Dr. Pepper from the fridge and crack it open before leaning across the island towards him.  

A plate of the leftover lasagna from Olive Garden sits in front of him.  He looks at you now.  You’ve got a feeling that you appear as tired as he does.

“I’m sorry,” you say.  “I was cruel.  You’re right and I’m sorry.” 

Miguel blinks at you over red sauce and ricotta cheese.

“I—” he starts.  He looks down and drags his fork through noodle.  You notice that he’s got a speck of something at the corner of his lips.  “I do regret the neighborhood on 1014.  And Hobie’s arm.  I regret it most when I’m watching you get carted off to treat another injury.” 

“I know,” you reply.  “And, God, no one blames you for 1014, and Hobie only likes to give you a hard time.  I’m sorry.” 

“I shouldn’t have said I would send you to the clean up crew.” 

“No, probably not.  But I shouldn’t have called you an asshole.” 

He nods, slowly, and your shoulders relax.  

“We’ll talk more after you eat,” says Miguel.

“Alright.”

— m. list

[ladykailitha]

You pardon me, I'm getting a little foamy at the mouth about this and if I don't rant about it, I may explode.

Lucas and the Game.

Which game? Both of them. Basketball and D&D. Because honestly I am a little lot weary of Eddie getting the lion share of the blame for what happened that Friday. Like I legit saw someone suggest that the school move the basketball game. Like what now?

Did Eddie make some CHOICEStm? Yes, yes he did. Lucas did not go to the dark side for playing a sport.

HOWEVER!

Lucas made some choices of his own.

Now, my information is 20 years old and I'm doing this based on memory, so if I get things wrong, also know I am from a different state than Indiana.

The play offs and championship games are announced ahead of time. There is no way Lucas was told THAT day that Hawkins was playing in the championship game. He had three days on the inside and a week on the outside of knowing when the game was.

Also take into consideration that the likelihood of Lucas PLAYING in said championship game is astronomical. Like the starting lineup and all the second string players would have to injured or fouled out before he could play. Because he's a freshman. He would have to wait out all the sophomores, juniors, and seniors(grades 10-12 respectively) before the coach would put him in. As opposed to a game that not only would he be playing in, he would be considered a valued member.

But as a club, Hellfire probably had set days they could meet. (Also, also, who the teaching advisor for that club and where the hell were they at any point during that season?)

So for most of the school year, the Hellfire club met on Fridays. Lucas would have known that.

So he had a few days to tell Eddie that he wouldn't be able to make it to the finale of their campaign, and he didn't. Then he didn't have to courage to tell Eddie himself and made Dustin and Mike do it.

So here's Eddie, president of the club (though, I can only imagine he was because no else wanted it, as something tells me I don't think they would have a let a double super senior president of anything), being told he's going to be down a player or be forced to move it. Something the other members of the club didn't want to do.

So why does Lucas's choice matter, but Gareth, Jeff, and the Unnamed Freak's choices don't?

So Eddie has to make a decision. Move it, find a replacement, or cancel it all together.

But since it was Dustin and Mike who brought to his attention THEY can find a replacement.

Because here's the thing about D&D and especially about being a DM. You build the fight based around the characters' abilities, classes, and magical items. And there is a lovely thing called CR or challenge rating. It's based on a party of four but can be adjusted for how many players you have. So a CR 10 would be a monster or fight that would take FOUR level 10 characters to beat. So six players, he would probably throw a CR 12 or 13 because of the extra players.

And if they are down a player it can really fuck things up, because what do you scale back and how?

We don't know what level all the characters were or what their classes were. We know that Lucas HAD played a ranger in the past so lets go with that. And since we know EXACTLY what Erica's character was: a level 14 half-elf rogue, so Lucas was probably of a similar level. And let me tell you TWO complete different skill sets.

Which is probably why the group is decimated at the end. Rangers are long range (heh) and rogues are better up close and personal. If Erica hadn't rolled a natural 20 both her and Dustin would have been dead when Vecna took his turn.

Sorry, I got off track a bit with the D&D stuff. But the purpose of that was to show that Lucas bailing last minute would have fucked things up for Eddie.

So TL;DR is that Lucas chose a game that he would likely be on the bench for for all of the game over a game he was an active participant in, didn't tell Eddie for DAYS and made his friends do it last minute, and then demanded the campaign get moved at the cost of the other members of the club's wants, and all because he wanted to be popular.

So, no. Eddie should NOT apologize for not catering to the wants of one member of his club over the needs of everyone else in said club. Maybe a bit on the traitor thing, but not moving the finale because Lucas thought basketball was more important? Nah...

[themultifandomgal]

Matt Casey- Hospital Hostage

"What have we got?" I ask Brett who's pushing in the gurney

"John Doe. Gunshot wound to the abdomen. Intubated in the ambo"

"Maggie?"

"Trauma room 2. I'll page Dr Rhodes" Maggie tells me. Before I know it my brother is in the room

"3, 2, 1" he says and we move the victim onto the bed. Connor assessed the wound "we needs to get up to surgery" Connor pulls the railings up on the bed

"YN can you come to the nurses desk?" Maggie asks peaking her head in

"Errm..."

"It's fine go. We'll be ok" April says taking my spot

"If your sure"

"Yes go" I leave trauma room 2 and head to the nurses desk when I see my ex Jordan. Confused I walk over to him him

"What are you doing here?" I cross my arms over my chest

"To bring you home"

"Home? I haven't lived there for 2 years. Since you were having sex with my best friend in our bedroom"

"Come on baby it was a mistake"

"Leave. Now before I call security" I turn around and start to walk away when I hear a click and screams

"Turn around and face me" slowly I turn around to face him "well at least you still fucking listen"

"Oh my god" Maggie gasps putting her hands up as Jordan points the gun at her

"Phones now" Jordan shouts. Everyone in the room pushes their phones towards us "pick them up!" Jordan nods towards Maggie who quickly picks the phones up and walks to the nurses desk

"YN lock the front doors"

"I can't do that. There's sick people on their way here. Put the gun down and we can talk"

"No!" He now points the gun towards me "no it's to fucking late for that. You had your chance to come home"

"So what's your plan here? You gonna shoot me? Because if you do you'll be going to jail for a very long time. You don't want that. So put the gun down" Jordan looks panicked. He looks around the room and grabs a young girl, late teens maybe

"Get down. All of you" he shouts putting the gun to the girls temple

"Ok. Ok" we all lower ourselves slowly. Maggie and I sit next to one another "why are you doing this? Why now?"

"You've moved on. Your fucking someone else. Your meant to be my girlfriend"

"Ok ok you have me. I'll break up with my boyfriend and I'll go with you" Jordan starts laughing like a mad man. He pushes the teenage girl down who crawls back to a woman who I'm guessing is her mother

"No because the only reason you want to come with me is because of this" Jordan waves his gun around

"Fine. Then just take me hostage. I'll go with you quietly wherever you want. The police won't find us, but if you carry this on the police will arrive and there's only one of you"

"Fuck" he groans

"Look around there's so many sick people in here who will die without treatment"

"I can't do that! Fuck!"

"I pressed the emergency button. Intelligence will be here soon" Maggie whispers

"Shut up shut up or I'll shoot"

Sirens are heard, getting closer and closer

"Who the fuck rang the police!" Jordan yells

"Your not letting people into the hospital. Someone outside probably rang them"

"Shut the hell up!" Jordan points the gun to me again

"Mags we gotta get people out of here"

"Got anything in mind?"

"I'll distract him, you get people out the front"

"Ok be careful" Maggie squeezes my hand. I get up and slowly walk over to Jordan

"Jordan please. People are going to die if you carry on. Look I'll go with you, wherever you want to go. I might not be in love now but I'm sure if you took me away somewhere I'll fall in love with you again"

"You don't mean that"

"I do. I promise you I do. Just put the gun down and we can leave together" Jordan holds the gun towards the floor and pulls me into a hug. I wrap my arms around him and look at Maggie who's letting intelligence in. Jordan may not be pointing at anyone now but he's still holding the gun. I pull away from him and take a step back

"Put the gun down!" Voight shouts

"You bitch" I close my eyes and hear a gun shot, but no pain. Slowly opening my eyes I look at the floor and see Jordan's lifeless body

"YN you ok?" Jay walks up to me slowly

"Yeah" I nod my head a little "I'm ok"

"Erin let Matt in he's going bat shit crazy out there" Erin walks out and in runs Matt. I run towards Matt, wrapping my arms around his neck. Tears run down my face as I burry it in his neck

"Shhh shhh your ok. Your ok" he runs a hand in my hair trying to calm me down

"YN take the rest of the day off" I hear Goodwin say to me but I don't acknowledge her

"How did you know what was going on?" I ask Matt

"Voight rang us to be on stand by just in case things escalated. Come on let's get you home" I give a little nod but cling on to Matt as he carries me outside

"Phone if you need anything" I hear Severide tell Matt

"Thank you. See you tomorrow"

With that Matt carries me to his car and drives us home.

[noxiatoxia]

More Komaeda sprite discussion...and something about Kamukura

Title says it all, lol.

So! If you keep up with my sprite posts, you may recall how I proposed a theory about a three-step plan in Danganronpa sprite making.

Yeah...about that...

So, we all know about the beta smirking Komaeda sprite, yes? I've talked about it at length. Earliest Komaeda "neutral" sprite we know of.

Then, we have the final sprite:

Cool. So...what about this sprite?

I know it might be hard to tell at first. But that's what .gifs are for!

On the left is a comparison of this "middle" sprite (so I'll call it) with the final one, and on the right, it's a comparison with the earliest "smirking" beta.

You can clearly see it's different from both sprites.

At first, since this is a Danganronpa S sprite and is only used in DRS game-wise, I figured it may actually just be a case of his mouth looking weird due to the Switch's file compression.

But take a look at this piece of merch, which would not be confined to being pixelated.

It's obviously the same sprite. To prove it, here's a chart I made:

You'll have to zoom in to see it. But it does show these are different versions.

Okay, so...what does this all prove?

Well, there's two theories I have in mind.

Theory one is that my three-step design phase is more like a four or five step phase, with some characters getting more alterations than others. Which honestly leads into my second theory that doesn't even contradict theory one: we know Komaeda's sprites were especially redone late into development. Therefore, he may have more minor tweaks done to his sprites than any of the characters.

I don't really have many thoughts on this...other than damn, I wonder what OTHER Komaeda sprites have had extremely minor changes made to them. This I will investigate when I look closer into DRS sprites.

Okay, so onto Kamukura. Same merch line, too.

Two photos just for extra reference, but I think the difference is obviously clear. His eye color is the same as Hinata's.

Reference gif just to cover all my bases, and I found something interesting. The first fold of clothes, right next to his collar on the left, is lined differently. It's thicker and the extra, very thin line is missing.

This would indeed indicate an earlier version of the sprite, and is in fact the same one used in UTDP and DRS.

I think what's funny is that Kamukura's eyebrows are colored in on this merch, but in the DRS/UTDP sprites, they aren't. Funny oversight I guess, but that honestly makes me wonder what the deal is with this image used for the merch.

The lack of color in eyebrows in the UTDP/DRS sprites suggest that they are earlier versions of this one used in the merch. But the biggest question becomes why would a stage 2 of 3 (in this given timeline) not have the red eyes if the others do? Either Kamukura was originally meant to have Hinata's eye color, or it was changed solely for this merch. Which...would be weird. They've never done that before, I don't think.

The other option is the early Kamukura sprites used for DRS/UTDP in fact did NOT have red eyes and they had to manually re-color them. But at that point, they would know these were beta sprites and not the final version. Did they not have access to the final version anymore, then? Or only the shadowed version?

Furthermore, I just noticed Kamukura's pupil in the UTDP/DRS sprite is misplaced...while the pupil is in the same spot in the SDR2/the merch sprite. Also his eyelash no longer peeks out from over his hair.

This is all giving me a headache so I'm going to bed lol.

Anyways, strange stuff.

[blasphemousclaw]

did the Volcano Manor existed before Rykard?

I think it’s quite possible! The existence of the Serpent-Hunter essentially tells us that there has already been a concentrated effort to hunt down the Great Serpent:

“Weapon that serves as both greatsword and spear. Thought to have been used to hunt an immortal great serpent in the distant past, it manifests a long blade of light when facing such a creature. When their master's heroic aspirations degenerated into mere greed, his men searched for a weapon with which they might halt their lord.”

We also know that Mt. Gelmir’s ancient serpent-worshipping civilization died out a long time ago…

“Curved sword fashioned in the image of an ancient serpent deity and tool of a forgotten religion practiced on Mt. Gelmir.”

…so we have to ask ourselves, what happened to them? They may very well have been purged by the Golden Order, who created a weapon specifically to destroy their serpent god. The Golden Order considers the serpent to be a traitor to the Erdtree, so it makes total sense that they would have carried out a purge against serpent-worshippers in such close proximity to the capital… and maybe erected a fortress around the volcano to ensure the serpent god never returned. The question is, was this hypothetical conflict the reason why serpents are considered traitors (and the Golden Order was simply doing what it does best — eradicating any civilization that might pose a threat to their own), or did the Golden Order already despise the serpent because of a different reason? (we might find out in the DLC… looking at you, Messmer)

Anyway, I can see this fortress over time becoming less focused on hunting the Great Serpent, as it doesn’t seem like it resurfaced for an extremely long time, and more focused on being used as a dungeon where criminals and heretics were sent to be imprisoned and interrogated. What better place to send prisoners than a long-abandoned castle on top of a volcano? Unfortunately for the Golden Order, the guy they made Praetor, though being very good at his job, also happened to really enjoy committing heresy himself.

Volcano Manor also has some architectural details I find interesting; they might not actually be intended to imply a timeline, but I feel like mentioning them nevertheless: Volcano Manor is a Gothic-style castle (at least the outside is; the inside is actually pretty Neo-Classical), but it’s always struck me as inspired by 19th-century Gothic-revival palaces more so than genuine Gothic fortresses from the Middle Ages... the scale of the Manor, with its many intricate spires and chimneys and massive walls covered in windows, reminds me more of the likes of Neuschwanstein Castle and Hohenzollern Castle, which were built by 19th century nobility as luxurious showpieces… you know what, maybe that’s why it’s called Volcano Manor rather than something like “Volcano Castle”!

This idea seems to go against the idea that Volcano Manor is extremely old, but at the same time, this is a video game, so historical architectural styles can’t technically be used to prove or disprove a theory. Also, castles can be rebuilt! The current Hohenzollern Castle was built right on top of the old castle after it fell into disrepair. Who’s to say Rykard didn’t take on an entire remodeling of an old castle to meet his own architectural tastes… it’s certainly in character. I’d also bet that he added that giant mechanical bridge that we raise up out of the lava:

Anyway, tl;dr I think it makes a ton of sense for the fortress to have already been there, but if it was, Rykard probably did some remodeling.

[myveryownfanfiction]

18+ MINORS AND THOSE WITHOUT AGE IN BIO DNI

tags: @illiana-mystery, @iobsessoverfictionalmen, @psychokinetic-ectoplasm, @lulusplaycorner, @theselfshippingwitch

warnings: swearing, green goblin terrorizes New York

The phone rang again in the shop and I heard phoebe pick it up. Ray shot me a look and I rolled my eyes.

“rays occult bookstore.” I heard as I moved further into the stacks. Ray was already moving towards the counter. “How may I help you?” There was a pause before phoebe held the phone away from her ear. “Dr. Ray? I think we have a call.” Ray sighed and took the phone from her.

“We’re aware of the situation. Call the police and wait for Spider-Man.” Ray said before hanging up. Phoebe stared at him in shock.

“but Dr. ray…” she trailed off.

“that isn’t a call dear.” Ray said, patting her hand. He looked over at me.

“that’s some nutty scientist who went too far and made himself into a supervillain.” I said, emerging from the stacks. “It’s not a ghost. But because of the color of the suit and the flight technology…” I shook my head again. The phone rang again.

“Damn. And that’s going to be someone else calling about him.” Ray said before grabbing the phone. He rubbed his face as he tried to explain to the person on the other end it wasn’t a ghost.

“see this is what happened when all these heroes started making appearances.” I motioned for phoebe to follow me. She moved to my side and I wrapped an arm around her as we headed towards the back room. “Villains appeared too. And many of them have a calling card. You have this guy. The green goblin. He’s just crazy. There’s doc ock. Robot arms. We don’t get many calls about him. But he has destroyed the shop before so be careful. Electro. He’s taken out the lights several times and most people mistake him for a ghost.” I listed off as I went to grab a box of ghostbusters merchandise. “Sandman. He’s made of sand. We don’t get calls for him either. Lizard. Just a giant lizard man.” I started sorting through the box and looked at phoebe. “Grab a box.” I urged. She smiled and started going through a box of her own. “Vulture.”

“he’s one of the worst. Because his warehouse is next door.” Ray said, leaning in the doorway. “And he’s kind of a nice guy.”

“only you would say that about Adrian toomes.” I said, pointing a finger at ray. “Last time I talked to him he was leering at my ass.” Ray shrugged.

“and you put him in his place.” He said, coming over and wrapping his arms around my waist from behind before kissing my cheek. “You shoulda seen them. Right hook damn near knocked the man out. That kid Parker got a picture of it too. Never appeared in the bugle but I have a picture of it somewhere.” I laughed and hung my head.

“he does.” I admitted. “Proud moment for him I guess.” I cupped his cheek as ray pressed his cheek against mine. Phoebe smiled at us before giving back into the box in front of her. “But the long and short of it is there are many bad guys out there. Spider-Man gets them. They aren’t our problem.”

“when did you guys realize that?” Phoebe asked. Ray laughed.

“around the time someone called us for Spider-Man.” Ray said, looking at me for confirmation. I nodded. “Said there was someone just hovering outside their window. We suited up, went out. Just a kid in a suit. Hanging upside down from a web.”

“scared us half to death.” I said. Ray nodded. “But that’s when we realized that there were going to be more and more calls we couldn’t take.” I shrugged. “This one can go on the floor.” I turned towards ray and he nodded, hefting the box into his arms. I smiled at him as he took out to the shop. “We’ll get a legit call. Eventually. For now, why don’t you go hang out with podcast for a bit? He’s in the basement. Go be kids for an hour or so.” Phoebe nodded.

“thanks.” She said before heading down. Ray smiled at me from the counter as I walked out.

“next time you can answer the call about the goblin.” Ray said. I rolled my eyes.

“I prefer the calls about doc ock. You know that.” I said. “Less arguing.” Ray nodded.

“yeah I know.” He smiled at me.

[grits-galraisedinthesouth]

Dr. Phil Risks It All with Explosive Speech Supporting Trump — Calls Out Democrats as Bullies Trying to Silence Free Speech and Punish Independent Thinkers | The Gateway Pundit | by Jim Hᴏft

“I’m here to talk to and stand up for the people who have declared their support for Donald J. Trump,” he said. “Because you know what happens when somebody says, ‘Hey, I’m going to vote Republican’? They get canceled, intimidated, marginalized, excluded, or even fired.”

The television psychologist likened this phenomenon to bullying, claiming that those who dare to support Trump face severe repercussions, a theme he revisited throughout his address. You guys look just like you do when I’m on TV. Except for you, you look a little different. Listen, I love you guys for caring enough about the United States of America to come out here tonight. Thank you so much for caring enough to come out here tonight.

I have to tell you, I love this country. I do. I love this country. I stand up when our flag goes by. I put my hand over my heart when they play our national anthem. I’m so proud to see so many people take time out of their day to come out here and stand up for this country. Strangely enough, I’m not here just to stand up for Donald J. Trump. Lord knows he doesn’t need me to stand up for him. He’s tough as an old army boot. He’s got lots of enemies, different groups that are scared. Between them, they have impeached him, indicted him, raided him, railroaded him, shot him, and sued him. And where is he? He is still standing. He just keeps on coming because he loves this country, too. I can be honest and say… I can be honest because we have free speech in America.

I can be honest and say, I don’t like or agree with everything that Donald Trump does or says. I mean, come on. Nobody agrees with everything or likes everything somebody else says or does, right? No human is perfect. We don’t strive for perfection. We strive for excellence. But you don’t have to love everything about someone in order to love them. The last thing he needs is some celebrity endorsement. What the hell do I know? I know I’m no celebrity to begin with, and celebrities don’t know anything about policies or politics.

The only difference between me and them is I’m willing to admit it. Why am I here? Well, I’ll tell you why I’m here. I’m here to talk to and stand up for the people who have declared their support for Donald J. Trump, or they got found out, or they want to do it, but they’re too intimidated. Because you know what happens when somebody in this country says, ‘Hey, I’m going to vote Republican. I’m going to vote Donald J. Trump’? They get canceled, intimidated, marginalized, excluded, or even fired or boycotted. You know what that means? In short, that adds up to being bullied.

Now we’re talking about something I know a hell of a lot about. Now you’re in my wheelhouse, buddy. I may not be an expert in politics, but I am an expert about bullying. Bullying is when you seek to harm somebody, you seek to intimidate, coerce, cause distress, fear, risk to their well-being.

It can be physical, verbal, relational, or cyberbullying. It’s always wrong. You said it, my friend. It is always wrong when you bully somebody. That’s what’s going on. Now, let me tell you what the critics are going to say when they hear me talking about this. They’re going to say, ‘Well, now, wait a minute. Isn’t Trump a bully?"

Let me tell you why the answer to that question is no. Because to be a bully, there has to be an imbalance of power. When there’s not, it’s just called a debate, and he’s just better at it than anybody else. It’s called debating. It’s called arguing. It may even name-calling, but it’s not bullying unless there’s an imbalance of power. Whoever he talks to, they’ve got a microphone, they’ve got on their big boy pants, they’ve got a stage, they’ve got everything else.

He’s just better at it. The same thing is true. When the Democrats or Harris call him fascist, Hitler, racist, misogynist, or crook, is that bullying? Well, not really. It’s ugly.

But with the First Amendment, which we all want to keep, there’s no imbalance of power, so it’s not bullying. It’s just like when he does. It may not be the best use of energy. But when you attack civilians, when you attack a citizen, and you use the power of the internet to use a mob mentality, you incite people to gang up and cause boycott, then it’s beyond ugly.

That’s what’s happening in this country right now, and that’s not okay. There is an imbalance of power there, and it’s time that every one of us close ranks. We have to stop this now. It’s time that we push back against cancel culture. It’s time that we push back against intimidation tactics.

That is exactly the reason that I launched Merit Street Media, which, by the way, we didn’t choose the name for that by random. Merit Street Media. This country was built on hard work, added value, and talent, not on equal outcome, not on DEI.

This country was built on hard work, and it needs to continue to be built on hard work. The legacy media has sold out. The legacy media has sold out. I’ll tell you, one night, I was sitting at dinner with my wife Robin, and I was complaining as we were flipping around and listening to the spin, spin, spin, spin, spin, spin on what’s supposedly news.

I said, ‘Damn, I’m tired of listening to all this media spin and everything.’ Without even looking up, she said, ‘Well, you are the media. Why don’t you do something about it?’ She said, ‘If you’ve got bigger ratings than the four of them combined, why don’t you do something about it?’ Well, as usual, she was right. That’s why I launched the new network, because we want people to think for themselves. You guys aren’t dumb. You don’t need to be told what to think. You just need the facts. You’re here because you have the facts, right? You’re here because you recognize when legacy media edits answers and gives you what they want you to hear instead of the truth. When they start editing their candidate’s answers, they’ve lost their moral compass.

“They’ve lost their way. I would love to say it’s equal on both sides, but I’ll guarantee you when Beyoncé, George Clooney, De Niro, and Lizzo come out and say, ‘They’re for Kamala Harris,’ when they all come out and say, ‘They’re for Kamala Harris,’ did you read anything or hear anything in the media criticizing it? No. But you watch what happens tomorrow morning when people find out I came here to talk to you. You say this in Hollywood, and all of a sudden, you ain’t got a job. Problem is, I don’t need one. I don’t need a job because I got you. I’ve got a question for all of us. Have we lost our minds?

We have the First Amendment in America where our government has said we will pass no laws to infringe on our freedoms for religion and speech. So that’s the law, but we’re muzzling each other. What is going on? We have a law that protects free speech, so we start taking it away from each other? Are you kidding me? We can’t allow that to happen. We cannot encourage it. Let me tell you something about bullying. Bullies are bad, right? Yes. Let me tell you what else is bad. “Bystanders. If you are a bystander, if you are watching somebody get picked on, if you’re watching somebody get bullied and you don’t do anything about it, you’re just as guilty as the bully that’s doing the bullying. Am I right? Am I right?

I have talked to so many children in schools that tell me the worst feeling they’ve ever had is being bullied and feeling alone and abandoned when they are picked on and intimidated, when they wish even one person, even one other kid, would step up and say, ‘Hey, come sit with me at lunch. Don’t sit in a stall in the bathroom and cry your way through lunch and eat alone. We’re not going to let you be alone.’ It’s the same thing with adults. Adults don’t want to be cut out of the herd and feel like they’re alone. The number one need in all people is acceptance. The number one fear is rejection, and bullies prey on that. We must claim the right to our point of view. We must be critical thinkers. When you see somebody being picked on, then you’ve got to be willing to step up and say, ‘Hey, I’m with you.’

“Don’t let that happen. You’ve got to know why you’re strong on the issues you’re strong on. You’ve got to know why you’re strong on affordability and safety and security and the border and family care for men and women and law and order and your core values for your children’s education and our military. Know why you’re where you are. When you come to your friends and coworkers being bullied, don’t be a bystander. Don’t be a bystander. You can’t let it happen. When you say you love America, that’s a verb. That also means you love Americans. You’ve got to push back and call out the bullies. You’ve got to stand with those that have targets in their lives, targets if they’re picking on them by calling their jobs to get them fired, boycotting, or kicking them out at their jobs at church or their groups at church. I’ve spent 45 years listening to people.

I was just in North Carolina after the hurricane hit down there. You know what? I saw neighbors helping neighbors, and not one of them asked, ‘Are you a Democrat or a Republican?’ I saw neighbors helping neighbors, and we need to unify this country. You have the right to vote for who you want to vote for President, and we need to step up and claim it, and we need to stand with each other. There are so many who want to, but they’re bullied, so they’re afraid to. Let me tell you something. One of the most important days in American history was 9/12, 2001. Not 9/11. We all know what happened on 9/11. One of the most important days was 9/12, because on 9/12, we all woke up and we were all Americans on 9/12.

If you were an American on 9/12, stand up right now. If you were an American on 9/12, stand up right now. That’s who we were. That’s who we are. The difference between winners and losers is winners do things losers don’t want to do. We have to stand proud to help our neighbors who want to vote their conscience and not be afraid. No one should be alone. No one should feel abandoned. No one should have their business boycotted. If you hear somebody’s getting their business boycotted, you should get your friends and make sure their business gets doubled. If somebody pulls their advertising from your friend’s business, you should let those advertisers know you’re going to spend the rest of your life making sure that advertiser is boycotted until they do the right thing.

“You need to let people know this is over in America. We’re going to unify this country. We’re going to listen and not be intimidated. We’re going to go out and lead by example. Let’s quit complaining about what is and start doing about it. If your neighbor wants to vote the other way, say, ‘Fine, go vote the other way. I’ll love you anyway.’ Let’s lead by example. If they want to do it, let them do it. Love them anyway. But as for you, the collective you, I don’t want you to just listen and say, ‘Nice talk, Dr. Phil.’ I want you to march in your life. I want you to march with your beliefs. I want you to not be intimidated.

Don’t be stopped, and don’t just vote. Take five people with you. Like I said, the difference between winners and losers is winners do things losers don’t want to do. What they do is they take actions toward known outcomes. They deal with the truth, they set goals, and they go after them with passion. It’s time for us to bring it home. It’s time for us to bring it home. It’s time for us to be winners. Winners, winners, winners. I started by telling you I love this country. I’ll finish by telling you I love this country, and I love you for loving this country. God bless you, and God bless the United States of America.”"

[saltiestgempearl]

Today is the day! At long last, I can talk about my absolute favorite headcanon about Dr. Seward with you all.

I'm writing a new post about it instead of just reblogging my post from last year because that post is not spoiler free. That is, I posted October 22 of 2022, so it does mention things from entries that have not happened yet in the 2023 Dracula Daily.

That said, most of it is still fine now that the September 3 entry has arrived, so I have put together a slightly edited version that does not touch on anything that happens after the September 3 Dracula entry:

It starts out with this passage from today's entry:

How can he'—and he pointed at me with the same look and gesture as that with which once he pointed me out to his class, on, or rather after, a particular occasion which he never fails to remind me of—'know anything of a young ladies? He has his madmen to play with, and to bring them back to happiness, and to those that love them.

The thing is, that's not exactly the wording in the original book. In the original book, it says “He has his madams to play with, and to bring them back to happiness, and to those that love them.” Many people write this off as a typo to the point of changing it to “madmans” or “madmen” in some versions.

But what if it wasn’t a typo?

The word “madam” implies an older woman, like anywhere from middle-aged to elderly. And at the time, it was not at all uncommon for women in this age group to be sent to asylums to recuperate. Sometimes it was just a way to get female relatives you didn’t like out of the way, but sometimes it wasn’t.

You see, many Victorians (men and women alike) unironically bought into the “delicate woman” narrative. People really, genuinely thought women were just psychologically more predisposed to mental instability.

Anyway, the headcanon is that Seward actually started out as a relatively low-level psychologist at an asylum, primarily working with middle-aged to elderly women. And being the inquisitive man he is, he interacted with the patients in a less-than-conventional way, letting them talk about things that would normally be considered signs of imbalance by the contemporary medical community (e.g., “sometimes I wish I’d never had my children,” “sometimes I just want as little to do with my husband as possible,” “honestly those suffragettes make some good points,” etc.). This isn’t to say he was some feminist icon mind you; he didn’t even necessarily agree or legitimize these ideas. But he didn’t shoot them down either—he just listened. And by engaging with the women in this way, he was essentially exploring some of what we now call talk therapy, which was very much not a thing at this time. He may have also tried to be supportive of their hobbies, which while not unheard of (institutions like Bedlam set a precedent for this), was not the most common thing either.

So he did this for a while, and surprise surprise, it actually helped these women quite a bit. He quickly got a reputation for being someone who was unusually gifted in turning around cases of “nervous disorders” that were so common with these delicate womenfolk.

But then some higher-ups decided “oh, well if he’s good with this, he must be good with insane people too.” So despite being a 29-year-old budding psychologist in a very young field, he suddenly found himself the head of an asylum with a very different sort of population to treat.

Given why he was put in this position, Jack naturally continues using the methods that helped his former patients recover so spectacularly. The issue is, of course, that people who are dealing with psychosis or other more serious conditions generally need a different approach than neglected women with anxiety. Basic talk therapy isn’t going to cut it with someone like Renfield.

But again, this field is very young, so Seward is actually relatively limited on how much he can research this. So he continues with his talk therapy, but then adds things like straightjackets into the mix when his patients have meltdowns because that was also a relatively accepted solution at the time (though not universally so; even in Bram Stoker’s time, there were some professionals in the field who had figured out that this type of manual restraint was not helpful and honestly not humane.)

It’s also possible that Jack might have had some criticism early on for not being firm enough with his more “difficult” patients, so he might have overcompensated for that by using the straightjacket solution more often when things got out of hand.

And finally, Jack also has his mad scientist tendencies that he openly grapples with in his diary—you know, the sort that caused him to make wildly irresponsible decisions like “let’s let Renfield escape, but supervised, and see what happens.” And since Jack was the head of the hospital, no one shot down this obviously ridiclous idea because they probably didn’t have the authority to.

TL;DR: The headcanon is “maybe Van Helsing did mean ‘madams’ because Jack started off wildly successful in treating older women with anxiety, and as a result was catapulted into a much more powerful position he was neither properly trained for nor mentally ready for.”

[covid-safer-hotties]

Also preserved on our archive

Some weird minimizing among calls for concern, but not a terrible article.

By Carlyn Zwarenstein

Stop me if you’ve heard this one before. A new variant of SARS-CoV-2, the virus that causes COVID-19, suddenly breaks out like a horse from the gate, leaving the rest of the race behind. This time, it’s a variant called XEC (“Zek”), which is a recombinant — the result of two variants joining forces.

“We controlled [the virus] a little bit initially, but then let it rip, and once you have an uncontrolled spread, it does mutate. And also it recombines, like when somebody has [been] infected with two different things, like in this case KS.1.1 and KP.3.3 recombined to form this XEC variant”, explained Dr. Raj Rajnarayanan, associate professor and assistant dean at the New York Institute of Technology, in an interview with Salon.

Rajnarayanan, a computational biologist, has studied the repurposing of old drugs for the treatment of viruses since the original SARS outbreak of 2002-2004, and he’s closely following the rise of XEC, which was recently added to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC)’s variant tracker. By the end of last month, XEC commanded an estimated 4.7% share of the total number of variants globally (and 6% in the US, with a wide margin of uncertainty), but unlike KP.3.1.1, which still holds a 36.9% share (58.7 in the US), XEC is on the way up, and fast.

“It might start becoming the top circulating lineage,” Rajnaranayam said, predicting XEC will take the rest of October and early November to gradually outcompete KP.3.1.1 in the United States, becoming the dominant lineage over the winter 2024/25 season.

Rajnarayanan doesn’t believe we need to worry about XEC in the sense that it represents a substantially new form of SARS-CoV-2, as when the first Omicron appeared on the scene with new symptoms and vast number of new cases, spawning an entirely new branch on the virus’ evolutionary tree. Jerome Adams, who was Surgeon General during the Trump Administration and those terrible early days of the pandemic, sees vaccination as part of a routine that, if kept up, can protect many of us from the hospitalizations and deaths that COVID is still causing regardless of the variant. And it can protect from the increasingly-appreciated dangers of long COVID, in which the symptoms of the disease linger for months or even years.

“We’ve been through this literally dozens of times since 2020,” Adams told Salon in a video interview. “There are going to continue to be different variants out there. Sometimes they’ve going to be more transmissible, sometimes they’ve going to be less, sometimes they’re going to cause more [severe] disease, sometimes they’ve going to be less severe. And we need to make sure we’re leveraging the tools that we have available to be able to live with the virus, masking when it makes sense, particularly in the midst of a surge, testing."

Adams said it’s really important that people understand they can order four free at-home COVID tests, emphasizing to seek treatment if you test positive.

“Vaccines and ventilation are the big tools that I want people to really think about,” Adams said. “And the new vaccines that are available, the newly released vaccines from Moderna, Pfizer and from Novavax.”

Adams says that a big concern is the very poor recent uptake in vaccination. Vaccines, which offer some short term protection against transmission, are far more important in their ability to reduce severity of acute COVID and incidence of long COVID. And in fact, as a recombinant — which likely evolved in an immunocompromised person infected for a very long time with the two parent variants — XEC is a variation on a recent theme for which the latest vaccines happen to be quite well-matched.

“We compared people who got the updated vaccine last year versus people who did not, [and] we saw that there was a 60 plus percent, almost a 70% decrease in hospitalizations and death in people who got the updated vaccine last year,” Adams said. “There’s also increasing data out there that shows that you may decrease your chances of long COVID by up to 70% if you have an updated vaccine. So you’ve got something out there that can really help protect people from both acute and long term problems, but we’ve got very poor uptake, and I think it’s because, again, we keep going through these surges, and it’s become kind of background noise to a lot of people.”

Adams notes that many, many Americans who are actually at high risk and in need of updated vaccines (the original series no longer offer significant protection in the face of newer variants) simply don’t see themselves as being in a high risk category.

“We know that seven out of ten adults in the United States actually have one or more risk factors for a negative outcome from COVID,” he told Salon. These factors not only include things like cancer or immune deficiency, but less obvious things like diabetes or pre-diabetes, high blood pressure, respiratory issues — even obesity.

Although typical symptoms of COVID infection have changed over time, we have more tools — vaccines, drugs like Paxlovid and so on — than before, and the risks associated with both acute disease and post-infection symptoms remain substantially the same as they have since we reached the point that most of the population had been exposed to the virus’ spike protein, whether by infection with COVID or by vaccination against it.

“And so one of the things we need to do is to help people understand actually, the majority of U.S. adults have one or more risk factors for a negative outcome from COVID, one, and a negative acute outcome. But two, everybody is at risk for long COVID,” Adams stressed, even children.

Viral fitness Despite all that has remained constant, XEC has sparked interest among experts, partly because it represents a bit of a mystery right now. To understand that, we need to look a bit closer at what goes on in viral evolution.

“There are three proteins we already always look at,” Rajnarayanan explained. These include the spike protein; 3Cl, a protease or enzyme necessary for viral replication (it’s the part of the virus that the antiviral treatment Paxlovid targets); and a protein called N, which stands for “nucleocapsid.”

Ryan Hisner, a teacher and co-author of several papers on variants, told Salon that where XEC is most surprising is in the third of these: N, the nucleocapsid.

“I’m looking at [XEC’s spike protein], Hisner recalled, “and trying to figure out, well, I don’t really see why it is even growing faster. Usually if you have something come out and really start to spread internationally, and grow and take over, there’s some pretty apparent change that is conferring that kind of advantage to it. And it just didn’t really seem like there was anything obvious. And so I started looking through the rest of the genome.”

As Rajnarayanan’s list makes clear, the famous spike protein isn’t the only important part of SARS-CoV-2. The nucleocapsid protein is far and away the most abundant protein in the virus. In coronaviruses, including this one, N plays many roles, including allowing the virus to replicate. But another vital role for the average N protein is to package up the virus’ genetic material and tuck it inside the virion (the individual virus being assembled) during active infection. It does this by holding tightly to RNA, the single-stranded molecule that turns the genetic information encoded in DNA into proteins.

The original COVID variants were heavily phosphorylated — that is, they contained a lot of phosphate atoms attached to different amino acids making up the protein. All that phosphate reduced N’s ability to bind RNA. This seemed to represent a trade-off: the virus was good at evading immune responses from its hosts (humans but also other animals) and at making copies of its genetic material, but not very good at packaging them into new virions.

At least, not so good compared to the more recent variants we’ve seen.

That’s because, many variants ago (back in the days of B.1.1, to be precise), the COVID virus came up with a new trick: mutations in the nucleocapsid that truncated it, resulting in a shorter protein — basically, a nucleocapsid protein that is missing half its length. This shorter new nucleocapsid, called N* (pronounced “N star”) , was still able to replicate efficiently but was also really good at packaging or assembling virions, even though the missing part was the highly-phosphorylated part that binds RNA.

As Hisner put it in a Twitter thread, citing pre-print research from Nobel Prize in Chemistry laureate Jennifer Doudna and others, “with N*, the virus could have its cake and eat it too. It can go ahead and phosphorylate N a bit more, boosting RNA synthesis, without having to sacrifice as much assembly efficiency since little N* can take up the slack on that front.”

Variants with N* have typically produced higher viral loads and more severe disease in patients. Hisner notes that early on in the pandemic a common mutation that turned up in many variants right at or around the usually-highly phosphorylated N3 region of the nucleocapsid likewise decreased phosphorylation — just like the mutation that produced N* — and that this also appeared to produce more severe disease.

Clearly, reducing the phosphorylation of N and creating N* has offered benefits that have allowed this mutation to flourish among generations of variants.

“So N* was clearly a very advantageous mutation for almost the entire pandemic,” Hisner said, “And now there’s this mutation that destroys it, really."

It started with the recent ancestor of XEC, KP.3.3, which exhibits a mutation that undoes destroying the essential transcription region of N* so the N* protein can’t be produced. Surprisingly, this variant has done well, taking over in Japan, for example. And now KP.3.3’s descendant, XEC, has the same little mutation and is surging in the U.S. and elsewhere.

“It may be that somehow producing N* is now a detriment to the virus where it used to be beneficial,” Hisner told Salon. In fact, with XEC’s spike protein being pretty much the same as the currently leading variant, the explanation for its surprising growth seems to be that this time it’s a change in the nucleocapsid protein, not in the spike protein, that is giving it a relative edge.

Playing the game About 450 Americans died of COVID in the last week of September (down from over 1200 in the last week of August). A further proportion — with wildly varying criteria and estimates ranging from around 2% to over 10% — will end up with post-COVID symptoms, which include long COVID but also things like heart attacks and strokes, and new-onset diabetes in adults and children. Cognitive impacts, which can be long-lasting or permanent, may occur after mild cases. Although COVID is known to have effects on the immune system and more infections correlate with greater risk of post-viral symptoms, past infection is not yet considered a pre-existing condition like others that increase the risk of such symptoms.

As a multisystemic vascular disease primarily transmitted through the respiratory system, masks — especially N95-style respirator masks, which use clever physics to filter particles as tiny as viruses — effectively prevent most transmission. However, cleaning air in shared spaces by improving ventilation and using air filters is likely the most effective way to make a dent in the availability of variants for evolution to do its work on, while offering numerous other benefits for health and cognition.

“It frustrates me,” Adams said, “because honestly, you get around the controversy of masking and of vaccinations and mandates when you just make the air cleaner for everybody [...] I actually call it the biggest missed opportunity of the pandemic.”

Sure, XEC seems to have an advantage relative to other variants around at the moment, which is driving its increasing share of cases. But it’s no Omicron: unlike that gamechanger, XEC is prominent in a game that we know all too well by now.

[emerald-onion]

Things Dr. Ink Is Not Allowed To Do At The Foundation, by Dr. Dream (WIP)

Stop teaching Agent Blue swear words.

Not even in different languages.

Spike the coffee machine with laxatives is not only gross but also immoral.

Don't the SCP file as your personal notebook. How many times do I have to say this?

Try to convince everyone that SCP-404 is 'a big softie inside' is just plain suicidal.

Answer "What the fuck do you want?!" with "Your SOUL" is right out.

Stop telling everyone your paintbrush is secretly a staff member.

Stop telling a staff member they are secretly a paintbrush.

"I forgot!" is not and will never be an excuse for nearly killing all of your co-workers.

And neither is "They didn't pass the vibe check".

Nor "They shouldn't have eaten the last muffin".

Rolling up to someone with a trenchcoat and saying "I have brought the goods" isn't as hilarious as you may think.

Don't tell the new recruits that SCP-99 will adopt them if they call it 'Nootmare'.

Don't tell people that your medicine is drug.

Don't hide drugs in your medicine. Trust me, I'll know.

Showing SCP-404's shitty Undernovela's knock-off was fun one time and one time only, and that was before it destroyed our entire west wing.

Don't give Agent Blue candies.

Don't give Agent Blue honey.

Don't give Agent Blue cake-pop.

Don't give Agent Blue any kind of sugar, period.

No, "What have you done?" is a desperate plea for you to stop, not "Please continue".

There is not any SCP Dating Simulator. There has never been a SCP Dating Simulator.

Not even in Japan.

And no, this isn't a suggestion to make one.

Dr. Ink is not the God of Creation. Not even if your cult says so. Since when did you have a cult in the first place?

Stop submitting your paperwork in the back of a Kung Fu Panda DVD.

Stop stealing SCP-404's chocolate.

Stop hiding SCP-404's remote control.

Stop rearranging everything in SCP-404's containment cell by one inch to drive it insane.

Stop messing with SCP-404, I beg of you.

Drawing SCP porn on the Foundation walls is strictly forbidden.

Don't tell Agent Red this world is a shitty crossover fanfiction and everything he knows is fake.

Don't tell Agent Red that he and Agent Blue are the clones of Dr. Sans.

Yes, I know that it's possible, Agent Cross is standing right there, but stop giving him an existential crisis, please.

Don't tell Agent Blue his action figures are alive and they're silently screaming for him to break them from their inanimate prison.

Don't call Agent Blue Berrybaby specifically to piss him off.

Don't convince Agent Blue Santa Clause is real and he just needs to go to Antarctica to find him.

Seriously, leave the poor guy alone.

No spilling melted chocolate on someone and telling them it's SCP-99's goop.

Stop trying to wear high heels to make yourself taller. You broke your fucking leg, Dr. Ink.

Didn't I order you to stop messing with SCP-404? Why do I see a giant graffiti of SCP-404 in a cat hoodie in front of its containment cell?

SCP-404's dolls are not made of the remains of its dead victims. It has already been terrifying enough already, stop fanning the flame even more.

Yes, you have a bad memory. No, even that won't make you forget the large fire you start in the cafeteria 10 seconds ago.

The Foundation exists to protect the people, not a big conspiracy to control everyone's mind.

There is no such thing as a Reset button. Stop saying that every time you mess something up.

SCP-99 cannot be pacified with a lullaby. Don't tell the other scientists that. We're short on staff already.

Playing your flute at three in the morning is just plain creepy.

The Foundation does not have a dress code. Especially not 'Maid uniform'.

I know you still meet up with SCP-90 sometimes. I don't know how, but I know. For God's sake, Ink! He's a freaking body-snatching parasite!

You're absolutely not allowed to knock on the D-personals' door and tell them "It is coming. There's nothing you can do to stop it."