#‘I like my men like I like my evil. Evil’
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Do you think that cis men feel the same way as trans men do? Like with how men get treated by society as being inherently evil and as predators?
I think maybe both cis and trans men experience these issues but it's easier for a trans guy to point it out because he gets to see people so quickly turn on him for being a man while transitioning
oh yeah definitely
I find "meninists" fucking obnoxious, especially as any of their VALID concerns fall under the bracket of feminism, but there does exist a presence of radfems and terfs that are scarily eager to lash out at anything resembling masculine that. Definitely needs to be addressed somehow
Like. There's a mile of middle ground between "Um yeah women have problems, whatever, but what about ME and MY FEELINGS 😢" and "I am genuinely trying my best to be thoughtful and considerate of others, and everything I do is being met with bad-faith interpretations and dismissal"
And I think the best advice I have for anyone else getting bogged down by this is that. like.
If someone is determined to see the worst in you, nothing you can do to prove otherwise will be enough. You will never change that person's mind. They don't want you to change their mind. So like... just focus on you, and keep doing your best, and learn, and know that people determined to find something nasty don't really have an issue with YOU- they have their own experiences and traumas coloring their worldview.
Someone who is determined to see you as a monster will only ever see a monster. So it's better to ask yourself, "would a monster do what I'm doing?". If the answer is yes, take steps to change that. If the answer is no, then it's not about you, and you can give yourself permission to move on.
So... yeah, I imagine cis men probably do feel the way I feel about this sorta thing sometimes.
Except, like. After a lifetime being a girl, living as a girl, fighting for equality as the only girl in a lot of men's spaces, being a feminist girl and an Eldest Daughter girl and calling out the bullshit only to later realize I'm not a girl... and that Im actually mostly a dude, still a feminist... at least when people call me a mysoginist, I know they're talking out their ass
I can kinda see where young men encounter their very first radfems calling themselves feminists and immediately become radicalized right-wing conservatives cause like. If I as a teen thought feminism meant Radfems and Terfs, I'd probably start running too
It's all just so exhausting
Any one group being wholesale grouped as "100% helpless gentle victim" or "100% selfish malevolent monster" is doomed, imo
(Now watch the notes blow up with "this is just 'not all men' rhetoric, lol)
But anyways I hate nuance I hate interpretation I hate implication and symbolism and context and I wish everything in the world was simpler so we could all blow a collective joint together and invent some new soups
#Teaboot#Don't even get me started on TIRFS#Yeah boys and girls are statistically raised different in our society but that's not divine fate bruh we're all still people#All this infighting pitting queers like me against queers like me when we SHOULD be tackling bigotry as a whole together#My family isn't my enemy#I'm tired#Lol corrected the piss typo
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I'm happyto enlighten the situation to the best of my ability!
I don't think he's a shit person or some transphobic monster by any means. It was just a small blip of disappointment, a reaction that could have been better, sure. And hopefully his stance has changed!
I am not asking him to be cancelled to spreading some kind of rumor that he's bad/evil/heartless/what have you.
He was on a live video, with a bunch of fans in the chat, a few years ago. Maybe two or three? I was living in LA at the time so somewhere around 2021 ish.
I was in the chat, people were joking about him being single, I jokingly asked if he'd be into trans guys, not really thinking much of it because it's not like he's gonna date me, some random nobody fan, but hey a boy can dream right? I had also just come out fairly recently so this interaction was one of my first experiences (although by no means my last) with this kind of attitude.
He saw my comment and kinda made a "yuck" face, flinch back tongue out gaggy type reaction and said he didn't know what he'd do with "all that down there" he did a couple "ughs" and a shudder/hands waving away guesture and moved on.
Very quick, not any overarching statements against trans people or trans men. Just a quick little disgust reaction to the idea of dating/sleeping with? A person who has a vagina.
Disappointing is all.
Honestly, with all the tradwife cooking trash circulating, it only makes me love B Dylan Hollis more for baking vintage recipes while being openly gay, making sexual jokes, and screaming at the ingredients. He's the antithesis of every soft-spoken cishet woman cooking for her husband and children. You don't have to be an idyllic cottagecore housewife to cook.
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Someone made a ship edit of Buffy and Faith and one of the rebuffs for the ship was someone going “you’re wrong Buffy hated that girl bad!!” Or something like that. and like ??? That’s quite literally never stopped her before. I fear that’s what drives her into all her relationships
#‘I like my men like I like my evil. Evil’#like ….. girl#buffy summers#faith lehane#spike btvs#angel btvs#fuffy#spuffy#bangel#btvs#buffy the vampire slayer
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[ BOUND BY BLOOD ] - H. H.
master lists <> + CHRISTMAS EVENT: day two (n/a yet)
pairing: Hyunjin x fem! reader
summary: A seductive vampire who has been watching you for centuries finally reveals himself. As Hyunjin pulls you deeper into his world of immortality, the line between love and obsession begins to blur.
date: December 21st 2024
playlist:
warnings: MDNI + NSFW + BLOOD KINK + ORAL + LOTS OF EXPOSITION + MENTIONS OF WITCHCRAFT & PAGAN HOLIDAY + EXTENSIVE PINING
Yule is more than a concession of sacred days ending in immense celebration. You knew of this from a very tender age, of course.
Your mother impressed upon you how vastly more important it was than any other festivity held throughout the year in your small village. A place nestled in the rocky edges of the St. Romanov mountains, just below the everlasting castle at the very top of the harsh scenery. In a dreary land, everyone would be just the same—sulking like the grey, cold clouds that hung high above, even in mid-summer, and bitter like the bark of the evergreen trees and pines occupying the surrounding woods. Many who lived far and near the little ancient plot began to whisper of its strangely happy and content inhabitants centuries before books made of linen and leather were being traded for secrets on the land they lived on.
Some talked of how women resembled eerily beautiful statues on a winter's night. Others told tales of men who never seemed to age past their prime but nearly always perished under terrible circumstances, whether in secret or for all to behold. You were born to a family who pressed truth into these oh-so-beguiled wise tales made up by outsiders. Yet, that was natural within a family littered with witches and warlocks of every kind.
Young and blessed with slow aging and graceful wisdom, your mother and father took it upon themselves to grant you a moderately lavish life within the strangely quaint village. You went without very little, and whatever your kind heart desired was promptly given. Your demure features disarmed many, growing enchanting as you neared the age of two centuries, looking nothing past the age of two bright decades. One might call it luck -especially living in a jagged and whimsical place. But many who lived beyond called it witchcraft at its finest point -the undead's evil doing.
You paid the assumptions no mind. Content with living a life in your studies of the dark arts under the teachings of your nearly pestering and frazzled mother and her less distracted and elated partner -your father. To some extent, he was a patriarch of the town, never fully taking on the title of its Baron and never desiring to when asked. He helped people experiencing poverty, aided people in need, and advised those who did have a hand in village affairs. On the other hand, your mother saw to the population's superstitions and unusual ailments and guarded their shaken resolves with practiced and refined magik. You had undoubtedly become their most prized offering to the masses. A beauty many could behold but could never understand being kept so hidden away at your family estate.
In turn, you were plagued with loneliness that could only be ailed by knowledge of the arts for so long. Years shifted into another half a decade of unbound youth and restrained confidence for you. Thinking of another century in such a state made your heartache and your head spin with sound worry. The terror struck you at family dinner in the dining hall, and you nearly opened your mouth to suggest an alternative to your parents. However, you were halted in a speech by your ever-so-live mother, who'd been unable to stop smiling since you stepped foot into the candlelit room behind your father's usual late arrival.
"I have grand news for you, my dear!" she beamed, and you perked up in your seat in interest. "Mother?...' you cautiously egged her on, sipping from the blackened wine glass set before your plate of half-finished food. She waited to hear you swallow your blackberry wine before glancing at your oddly silent father. "I and your Papa have a gift for you...well, a surprise, to be more specific."
Please, Mother of Darkness, do not let it be another grimoire. I've already filled in four others.
You prayed to the powers that be in a single silent breath, glancing between them as they observed you. "Oh...please do tell me of it. You know how little patience I have for surprises." The sweetest smile crossed your face, pulled tight by subtle anxiety and held there by a need to seem mildly normal about the implications of receiving a new and unknown gift.
Yet, it fell into a quivering line as your mother excitedly spilled her heart out for you to hear.
"We have found you a match, and he is rather eager about it. More than we are if my senses ring true!"
The light wave of shock that gripped you dissipated into relief. A hot flush rushed through d your veins like a flame catching the edge of fresh linen. Any other woman being told of a secure match might feel her heart turned to icey malice, but all you could taste was wild freedom being attained without much fight.
And you couldn't be happier to have it.
Who this match was and why he was so eager to be one with you was another mystery for different times. Now, you wanted a moment to relish in a world to be discovered outside the village you'd known an entire lifetime and mask that joy from the two beings who gave you such power over life as if their announcement hadn't changed a thing in your reeling mind.
With a deep and steadying breath, you replied, "How fortunate. I look forward to beginning our union."
Your mother nodded, sipping wine while your father grumbled a phrase of contentment. She offered you an all-too-tender smile, her bright gaze sparking as you tilted your head in curiosity. "Is there something more you'd like to tell me, Mother?"
She sighed, humming melodically, then set her glass down to speak again, her tone genuinely matter-of-fact.
"You'll be traveling to meet him at his estate within a fortnight."
This wasn't unexpected, yet hearing it aloud stirred a peculiar thrill within you, an undeniable pull toward the unknown that lay waiting.
The fortnight came within a whirlwind of a day. Your belongings were packed and shipped off early at noon, and your father blessed and sealed your treasures an hour before your departure. Your mother sent you off with genuine gifts of goodwill and more excellent fortune, refusing to speak on the mysterious author more than she already had -which only gave you a semblance of a surname from which to paint a picture of him.
Hwang.
It was all you'd know of him until the moon reached its height and your horse-drawn carriage stopped in the gravel walkway in front of his glaringly cold estate. You imagined his features, charm, voice, and sway over those within his power. Sketching his imaginations in a tattered leather-bound grimoire and writing earnest anecdotes of goodwill under each one. You wrote and drew until your hand ached, glad to see the semblance of a large mansion coming into view far across a snow-touched meadow.
The book snapped shut as you refined your focus on the blatantly grand estate. Your mother had called it magnificent when describing where this Hwang hailed from, but she left out the fair detail of how larger-than-life it seemed, with its gardens packed with mere hundreds of people.
A party.
A celebration.
An honoring of Yule.
You had never, ever seen such a large and lavish gathering. Granted, your mother and father never threw one as grand as the one you witnessed now from afar, but the edge of awe was still present as you observed it. People -men, women, the moderately young, and the wise old roamed about.
Some wore masks of gleaming gold, amber, and cherry red. Others wore black veils and cashmere shawls. Everyone in attendance held prestigious looks from afar, dressed in sacred colors starkly contrasting with the pure white snow coating the grounds.
Candles and lanterns were lit to perfection, leaking light into the moonlit night and casting a golden white glow on those who swayed beneath and through them. Shadows danced as many grabbed for waltz partners. A quartet strummed at their instruments and rang their bells into the air. Laughter and speech leaked into the music, piercing the sky.
It was life.
It was passion.
It was beautiful to see.
You ached to join the fun. Think of it constantly, even as the carriage stops at the steps leading straight to the heavy dark oak wood doors carved with the face of Medusa and sealed shut with iron wrought doubles of the letter 'H' leading straight to your new home.
With the help of a kind footman and the relief of a soft gasp, you took tentative steps to the top of the staircase, undeterred by the ice under your heeled boots and the gentle crunch of snow under your every movement. With a step left, the doors creaked open for you, a sudden chill wrapping around you before a steady warmth replaced it. You stopped short, unaffordable of the sudden eeriness, but perplexed to see not a soul standing behind the door.
"Mother of the moon.." you whispered in timid amusement, gazing up at the white sphere gleaming down on your clocked form before allowing its energy to steady your shaken nerves. When your mind could focus again, you bit the inside of your left cheek, slipping into the estate's front doors with a quiet huff, passing by the eyes of Medusa with a solemn smile of thanks.
The doors slammed shut as your feet hit the marble floor inside, loudly clicking its locks with finality as you spared them a final glance before sauntering further into the massive household. The small palace was lit, and not a corner was left cold or void, but not a life in your sight. It seemed as if the tree outside was merely a dreamscape and a phantom of reality within the world you stood in now - a wonderous opener to the spectacle within your suitor's less-than-humble abode. You reached another set of winding staircases. The embroidered carpet gently glistened under an amber-lit chandelier, never seeming to stain your wet footprints and littered with mistletoe, pine, fresh herbs, and trimmed garland. It was neat chaos at its finest, but what took your breath away was the line of blackened roses lining the center. Their thrones were pricked clean off, and their stems meticulously swirled in on themselves and tied off in an alternation of crimson red and deep violet silk ribbons. "How strange..." you thought aloud, pricking one from the warm floor, examining it until its petals were paled compared to the folded letter hidden underneath it.
It simply read in practiced well, done calligraphy,
"My Dearest Love,
The hour is late, and the world outside lies shrouded in slumber, save for me and my kin—ever wakeful, ever longing. I have watched you from the shadows, not with the eyes of a stranger, but with the gaze of a soul tethered to yours by threads spun long before this life. You do not yet know me, but I have known you for an eternity, each passing moment a cruel reminder of my yearning to claim what fate has promised me.
I am writing to you now, my beloved, because our meeting is near. The winter moon will shine brightest on the eve of the year's final breath, casting its silvery veil upon the snow-laden earth. In that sacred hour, I shall come to you. Do not fear the chill in the air or the stillness accompanying my presence. Know that every step I take toward you is born of reverence and an unyielding desire to protect, cherish, and love.
You may wonder why I have chosen you among all others, why I dare to speak of binding our lives together in the sacred vow of marriage. The truth is as eternal as the stars: I did not choose you. Though it beats no longer, my heart has always belonged to you. In your laughter, I hear the echo of joy I have long since forgotten; in your gaze, I see a light that pierces the veil of my darkness. You are the warmth my cold existence craves, the embodiment of all that is pure and eternal.
For centuries, I have wandered through this world, untouched by its beauty and unmoved by its offerings. Yet, the barren void within me stirred from the moment I beheld you, even from afar. My soul cursed as it is, recognized in you its redemption—a love that transcends time, a light strong enough to shatter even the deepest shadows.
I write this letter not to frighten you but to offer you a choice. When we meet, you will see me as I truly am. My nature, my curse—it is not one I would impose upon you without consent. But if your heart, as I suspect, already beats in harmony with mine, I ask for your hand, trust, and love. Together, we will defy the passage of time, weaving a tapestry of eternity that no force can unravel.
Await me on the night of our destined meeting. Do not despair the hour, for it shall mark the beginning of a love that poets and dreamers could only hope to capture. I shall kneel before you, not as a creature of the night, but as a man who has waited lifetimes to call you his own.
Until then, my love, guard your heart, for it is already mine. And know that no force on this earth, nor in the heavens above, could keep me from you.
Yours eternally,
Hyunjin..."
A weight lingered over your shoulders as his name slipped past your lips like pure honey. As if it were planned to happen, and for one explicable reason or another, he had pined for it to be that way on this very night. You pieced things together in the moment it took you to realize them. Every night since your 118th risi, you'd felt a presence -not nearly a calling- but something tethered to your existence. Had that been him for all these years? Watching over you in the smallest of moments. Moving when you moved. Listening when you spoke. Caring when it seemed no one else could. Being there when you felt further trapped in an unintentional isolation.
Were the sharp and bloodborne eyes trailing every move in glimpses of mirrors.?Was he the lurking shadow hovering above your own in the light of a single candle? Was he the one leaving gifts of your desire at the foot of your bed? Each one left with no note or card of recognition but instead wrapped neatly and meant for you to find and enjoy. Wasthee soft chill of breath you felt through the coldest nights? Twinged with a peculiar warmth and steadily streaming against the crook of your neck and behind the shell of your ear.
You thought of the possibilities, fueled by a deep curiosity and security, as you followed the trail of roses left along the ststastaircathrough staircase-through rooTandyandy stopped at a particular door on the second floor, previously leading through the tre right-wing amenities before the abr.aWithhith one big push of both your hands, you revealed what lay within the last unlocked room.
A man, dressed in fine clothing with a more captivating charmed beauty to match, stood before you in a moment of tensed admiration.
He seemed to hold in a breath, lips pressed into a slow-growing smile of recognition as his eyes scanned you in familiarity. Your heart thumped twice its normal speed as he did, and your feet shifted closer to each other as his gaze halted on your flushing face. "He-Hello..." you muttered, unsure what else to say and completely startled to see another person standing in the emptied estate.
Hyunjin did not hold your lack of recognition and frazzled greeting against you; he accepted them. I expect much worse, and he was glad those assumptions did not come to fruition upon your timely arrival.
He found the words to speak and the will to be heard when you took a half-nervous step back, shuffling closer to the doorway in a plain attempt to close it shut if prompted to. "You're quite alright. I've been waiting for you for some time now, so I would like you to stay even if it's for a moment..."
The cadence of his words and the gentle tone of his voice sounded the same as the whisper within your most common dreams. It was healing, charming, sweet, and meant to cause delirium to anyone who heard it without warning. You unconsciously paired it with the letter you'd found. Gripping it in your right hands, your mind collected subtle connections.
This had to be him.
Your allusive and eager suitor?...
"Hwang...Hyunjin..."
"That is my full name, yes..." he jested a bit, treading carefully through your observation of him. However, when your stare found him again, you seemed neither displeased nor perplexed.
"Are you to be my match, then? " you asked, hoping his answer would satisfy your growing uncertainties.
He nodded, nibbling at his lush bottom lip for a split second of tension relief. Then, you noticed his edged canines glinting in the soft light filling the room. Your heart jumped, but your breath slowed at the minuscule sight.
You'd gotten yourself a walking undead of your own, it seems.
Hyunjin's quick eyes caught yours wondering towards his mouth, fixated on the slip-upphe'ddd ma unconsciously but nowhere near frightened or frazzled by the reveal. It eased his rare nerves and allowed him to speak more freely as you inched further into the room to get a closer look at him. "I know stepping into this new life may be very odd to you now, but as I explained in the letter-"
"I've read it twice since my arrival..." you confess in one uttered breath, unable to keep smiling softly at him, "You're a lovely admirer and a gifted writer by all means..." You paused, unsure what to call him and afraid you'd begun to ramble, seeing his head lower at your words. However, Hyunjin flashed a charmed grin your way after half a moment. His pale cheeks flushed a tinge of rouge you thought was a trick of the light. How could someone so confident in their presence be so easily flustered? The answer was beyond you, but it was a question you cherished watching him watch you from across the room.
His smile fell to a slight smirk, eyes cutting to the side for a moment before he spoke again, "You are one charming doll... do you know that?" He chuckled, and you shrugged, eyeing him as he wandered closer with steady strides. "I've been told otherwise..." you confess in a whisper, accepting bated breath as he flows above the top of your head.
A pull surged in your chest, urging you forward into his immobile warmth and drawing your head up at an angle so his face remained inches from your own. Hyunjin stared back, eyes downcast in jaded concern as you hid a coy smile. "Wel, my love, they don't know you as I do."
He spoke of your intentional grace and earned your trust. He is unafraid to let you witness the flicker of vulnerability behind his maroon irises.
It was then that you knew what he thought of you, how he felt, with only your eyes to capture him.
A life to live in the eternity he found himself in.
One year came and went in the Hwang estate; in that time, you'd grown to love hearing that surname replace your own. Hyunjin was far more than a dashing husband and far better than any other living man you had encounteredHisis obsession with you was infinite and dedicated. It showed in every little thing he did for you and was present in every intimate interaction you had with him - even if he took each one no further than a heated kiss and a passing touch of his cold hands over your warmer flesh.
There were times it drove you mad.
His withholding of passion in fear of harming you during such acts was maddening, to say the very least. Sleeping with him had begun to be the only thing you could think of. You are noo longer able to keep such thoughts within the confines of your still-separated rooms during the dead of night and are frazzled by the visceral need to feel him take you.
He knew of your struggles but never acknowledged them. Hell-bent on sticking to his version of affection for as long as possible and undeterred by your subtle begging far longer than you had expected him to be.
That is until the very night you met him came around again.
Sweat shined your skin from the heat of the broiling water you sank into only moments ago. Herbs, spices sprinkled, and citrus shreds floated to the top of the scented bath. It was a relief to feel each component working into your tired body and slowly bringing life back into it as moments of solace trickled into a calm, quiet passage.
Finally, you could rest and not answer another question about decorations, food to serve partygoers of the evening, or what musical set to be played throughout the night. Taking on the task of planning for the Hwang household Yule was tedious and meticulous. Every detail was meant to be perfect, just as you had seen upon your arrival a year prior, but against Hyunjin's well-meant wishes, you took on the assignment with vigor for perfection.
It was overwhelming in all aspects, but you'd done it to the best of your ability, and now you wanted nothing more than to relax before the celebration began. The guests slowly showed themselves.
Your eyelids lowered, fully closing as the hot water sank deeper into your skin—the smell of fresfragranceses swept under your nose in gentle wafts. For a while,nt the world went utterly sti, ll, and you could hear the wind and snow softly blowing outside; your lonely peace was dissolved as a tender kiss was placed at the of your head by familiar lips.
"My love..." Hyunjin greeted you humbly, and you returned the sentiment by peeking your eyes at him. "My prince..."
He smiled at the neverending nickname you'd decided long ago to give him. You held his lingering gaze, tracing the lift of his lips as he leaned in to place a meaningful kiss against your lips. Your hands floated from the water, gently cupping his face as his lips pressed into yours. They were tinted with red wine and the lingering taste of iron blood, but you paid the bitterness no mind, delving for something more profound as he trailed a hand through your damp hair and brushed back the strands sticking to your flushed cheeks.
A fire stirred in your stomach, spiraling as the swipe of his tongue over your own melted the taste of him into your senses. Hyunjin pressed to shift backward, understanding the intensity of your exchange, but had no room to do so as your freshly manicured nails gently dug into the skin of his unblemished face. He stayed still, falling into a pattern of returning slow and wet kisses with you in the quiet of the large washroom. You hummed at his intentional sweetness to please you, smiling as he tilted your head back to rest on his thigh, your right hand cupping your chin firmly as his left raked through your hair and massaged the roots at your scalp. A trickle of drool seeped past your lips, tainted with blood a moment later, as he bit down on your inner lower lip with the tip of a fang. You whined softly as the sudden and short infliction of pain pleasured that he took joy in marking you in such a discreet place and was not timid about savoring the reward of your blood on his tongue, but the mix of elation didn't last long. Hyunjin snapped away from your lips, pressing loving kisses to them as you frowned and whimpered from the loss of connection. "Please do not torture me..." you huffed, legs closing instinctively to put pressure on the throbbing heat between them.
“Don’t…do this to me, “ you repeat yourself, stirring into a fever as his touch on your jaw slid to cup and caress the side of your face as if to lull you back to sanity.
He failed, a rare thing to happen, but something he couldn’t help as you stared up at him with the most unforgiving and pleading stare. “Please…” you utter to him, bottom lip catching between your teeth as his eyes settle across your body in a languid dance. His gaze stops at your chest -barely hidden in the cream-filled water, and you’re tempted to slip out of the bath and let him have a full view if it’ll coax him to give what you so desperately want from him.
Hyunjin needs no further persuasion than a flicker of sadness and disappointment in your eyes. You’re prepared to handle your growing frustration of heat alone and hope it will be done by the time guests arrive, but a simple phrase from him shatters your ideas of doing so.
“You’ve waited long and well enough.”
The sound of praise in his tone has you turning in the water to face him like an excited mutt being given a treat. Your smile returns, and your hands fall to rest on his thigh. “You won’t back down from me?…” You ask out of fear he will, knowing his quick change of mind could be fickle and turned again if you weren’t careful with your intent. Hyunjin stifled a chuckle, unbothered by your eagerness and thrilled to see you smiling at him brightly again.
That generous lift of your lips always made his cock twitch to life no matter when, where, or why it happened.
It was such a curse to him that even now, he failed to think straight enough as you rose a bit more from Luke's warm water to press a slow kiss to his parted lips. The cherry stain on your lips seeped onto his tongue, your tongue slow and delicate against his, steadily licking into his mouth a sweet confidence. He swallowed your noises, smothering them with nips and licks before easing your mouth open for a singular line of his spit to slide down your tongue. You purred at the feeling, sinking into the water a bit as he stood up and spat straight into your throat as if he owned it.
Because he did…and you adored him for it.
“Come with me…” Hyunjin grunted against your ear, not caring about the mess made, as he wrapped a strengthened arm around your waist to pull you from the cold bathwater. You helped lousy in excitement as he did, completely fine with being tossed over his shoulder like a sack of packed sugar cane. “I wasn’t finished bathing-!” You start to scold him despite not having the heart or right mind to mean anything by it, but a tender prick of his fangs to the flesh of your thighs startles you into a fit of giggles.
“And I don’t care anymore, my love…”
“Ca…c…can’t…” you choked on your words, falling to pieces as Hyunjin laid his head between your legs, hair sheened with sweat as your fingers traveled through and gripped every strand it touched tight. “Third time a charm,” he muttered, all too focused on the task in front of him and unbothered by your shaking thighs and rolling hips. “N-no..” you protested in half-sought agony, unsure if he’d even heard you when he earned another shout of his name with a slow and deliberate swipe of his tongue pressed flat to your entrance. He let the wet muscle rest there for a second, nudging it into your creamy walls inch by inch until you tugged at his hair and groaned in pleasurable despair at the feeling.
He added to the pattern, tracing the inner folds of your cunt and circling your bundle of nerves in repetitive motions. You quivered every time, leaking cum onto the fresh linen, and overstimulated in every sense you had left.
Hyunjin groaned loudly, with a collared shirt falling from his broad shoulders and your legs lazily hanging over them. A tug in your hips brought your scented body an inch closer to his face before he buried himself in your cunt again. Licking, searching, and finding exactly what he wanted. You squirmed and tossed above him, gripping at anything soft and mailable to have a steadying grip, but you couldn’t sit still or stay calm. Hyunjin wouldn’t have it any other way, sinking his fangs into your plush thighs and the soft skin just above your left knee to keep you on edge.
“N-ngh ugh….ah! Ah! Hy-Hyunjin…” you called for his attention, on the of unraveling, feeling his lips wrap around and suckle on your clit generously before his tongue went right back to exploring your insides in a practiced dance. He refused to settle down, looking up at you through fallen strands of dark and damp hair and devouring you with intent as your moans climbed to new octave before a scream tore from your throat at a final flick of his skilled tongue.
It nearly hurt how fast and how intensely he’d thrown you over the edge. A third instance is not more straightforward than the first two; a fourth is meant to top it all off immediately. You panted, feeling wild and shaken but unable to care as a buzzing heat flooded through your veins and leaked onto the sheets in arousal. It stained the soft fabric, your inner thighs -painting the darkened marks he’d left and smearing the trickles of blood he’d caused with small bites, and coated the bottom half of his face as he raised to hover above you.
You caught him in a delirious kiss, too tired to sit up and lock him in your arms but glad he felt no desire for you to do it. Hyunjin caved into you, letting your hands wander over his skin, across his shoulders, down his back, around his waist, and stopping right where his heart should beat in his toned chest.
There wasn’t a throb of life left in him, and you trusted that he saw yours as valuable enough to change.
One day…but not yet…
He answered your lingering question without a word, peppering the corner of your upturned lips with gentle kisses and soft sighs you returned. Your legs remained parted, allowing his free hand to lazily touch and spread your slick along the expanse of your cunt. “Such a pretty little flower for me…so sweet…and so,” he trailed off, nudging your head to the side to sink his teeth into your heated neck, drawing blood and a pleased moan from you as he took slow sips of your blood.
“Soft…” he finished.
His fingers plunged deep into your core, stretching the gummy walls within in slender but tasteful thrusts. You shook from the contrasting actions he was committing. Awed at how full he made you feel despite draining you in the same breath.
Was this the true love of an undead man?
Does the obsession of another once alive come back to life?
You hadn’t the slightest clue to answer both inquires, fixated on watching his fingers pump into your soaked entrance as your head spinning from the lack of blood beginning to take effect. Hyunjin refrained from sucking you dry, driven mad by the taste of you no matter how he got it, but aware of your limits as part of the living. Still, he detached from your neck with a soft and crisp sound, focused on pulling another climax from you.
You were on the verge of another, lashes fluttering as the syllables of his name faded into breathy gasps as your high tiptoed closer, but the slow drag of his fingers from your cunt slowed it to a standstill. “No..!” You yelp in disbelief, ready to shed tears if this was his way of putting a stop to your feigning for him, but your disappointment was short-lived and replaced with pleasant surprise as he shifted to kneel on the soiled sheets between your spread legs.
You watched in particular excitement as he stared you down, rolling his neck once to release tension in it, and licked the remaining droplets of your blood from the corner of his lips while reaching to undo the confines of his trousers. He said nothing as you marveled at the sight of his cock. Your face flushed a bit as he brought it into your view with his large hand wrapped around its inches more considerable length. You refused to speak a word, having imagined the sight of his cock more than once before, but speechless at its true nature being revealed.
Thick, full of stock, and neatly groomed.
You couldn’t take your eyes off of it -merely glancing up at Hyunjin in awe when he leaned forward to press the length of it against your sensitive folds, but shifting your gaze right back to it as he passed over your folds.
“Oh!…mmm..” you shuddered into a gasp and fell into a moan at the sensation. Your insides flipped and twisted, eager to know if his cock could reach new places you’d never forget. Hyunjin clicked his tongue, sparing a glance downward between your bodies before lowering his head to rest against yours, hips set back slightly to prod the tip of his length to your aching entrance. You whined, prepared for the stretch but intolerant of his ever-waning patience. “We’ll miss our first guests if we continue like this…” He hummed, sensing approaching carriages and steeds from afar in the low blizzard rousing the night air. You cup his face, eyes set on his as your lips curl into a coy smile. “Let them wait…Let them wonder where we are the whole night if that’s what must be done..”
He raised a brow, licking his lips while his cock inched into your untouched entrance, watching the fall of your smile into a small ‘o’ shape as he did so. “Your wish is my command, Lady Hwang..”
A/N: I’m sick so this is late but it’s a double feature (Changbin is next)
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I saw someone saying TERFs started with being furious about trans women but for some reason if you look at every single major TERF from the 20th century they all came out of general radical feminism and have extensive histories talking about All Men and how evil All Men are and how they would all gladly eradicate All Men if it were a possibility. The Transexual Empire, from the fucking eighties, the first major defining work of TERF literature, was all about the view that trans people were an extension of the patriarchy they'd been fighting ineffectually their whole lives. Stone Butch Blues talks about radfems hating butch lesbians for being too masculine.
I think part of the issue is that people literally don't understand who or what radfems are anymore. There's this pernicious belief, it seems, that a radfem is simply a shortening of trans exclusionary radical feminist. If you view TERFism as it's own separate thing and you refuse to look at it's broader roots or surrounding culture then you would get the impression that TERFism started with hating trans people because, like, no shit? It's tautological. Of course TERFs only hate trans women, that's their whole thing, right? But they didn't 'start' with hating trans women at all, because TERFism was not initially a movement all it's own! It is and was a specific and dominant school of thought within the radfem movement. While I may think radical feminism always bends towards unavoidable transphobia, TERFs were literally first named TERFs by other members of their category who considered themselves "trans inclusive!" Before that, being trans exclusionary was just one part of being a radfem.
Nowadays many TERFs are mind virusing themselves hard and becoming increasingly obsessed with trans people exclusively, yet even that has many detractors within radfem spaces who do also still hate trans people but think people around them are being ridiculous for losing track of what they consider the bigger picture. I've even saw TERFs calling other TERFs "homophobic" conservatives for caring more when a kink blog is ran by a trans woman than when it's ran by a cis man on the notion that those TERFs have more of an issue with gender non-conformity and queerness than what radfems are "supposed" to care about.
You are. Just. Wrong. Look at their fucking blogs right here on Tumblr. You will a lot of transmisogyny and exorsexism. You will see less transandrophobia on average because they try to keep their hatred of transmascs lowkey but you will see it if you look for it.
But you will, more than anything still with at least some of them but omnipresent among all of them, see a fuckton of complaining about whatever cis men are doing this week, and while none of them may hate cis men more, cis men give them daily opportunities to work themselves into a rage.
And a portion of the issue with THAT is that in large part a lot of people who otherwise disagree with them generally agree about a lot of their complaining about cis men. Few publicly take it to the point of calls for genocide of everyone with XY chromosomes, but TERFs and praxis progressives can agree on getting furious every time a sexual abuser gets a slap on the wrist. That means that you can show people a long list of TERFs hating men, like I've compiled twice, and then have half the examples dismissed because those are justified examples of expressing outrage at men. The thing that fails to understand, though, is that the point of TERF ideology is wrongly seeing trans people as an extension of the system that allows for things like that!
No matter how open TERFs are about their beliefs, TRFs will just say that you "shouldn't take fascists at their word" and then turn around and lap up the line that TERFs simply love trans men too much in a way that's a little too overbearing. It's so blatantly a self-centered cope to pretend that you are objectively the gender you say you are because no one could ever sincerely disbelieve in it. The only way for the "gender is a real thing that actually exists because we're positionally women" thing to work is for trans men to either not be men or not be oppressed at all.
Transfem TRFs don't care because this framework makes them feel like they're in the Wymbyn Club.
Transmasc TRFs don't care because playing pretend and imagining they have structural power over any subset of women, which now includes cis women based on "transmascs shouldn't get access to sexual abuse shelters despite being sexually abused at rates astronomically higher than cis women," gives THEM gender euphoria and might also turn some of them on based on how they act like they're in a bar telling me all about their Women's History class hoping I'll go home with them tonight.
There's this desperate desire to fashion a reality where it is provable with hard science that JK Rowling is not only wrong, which she is, but that her assessment of their status as women is exactly as demonstrably wrong as people who think the Earth is hollow. Except, the method they've come up for doing so is saying that JK Rowling isn't wrong, she's secretly right, but is just so driven by pure bigotry that she lies and spends millions of dollars and spits on her fanbase and let's herself become a despised figure...just to be mean. To trans women specifically and no one else.
And it's so obviously contradictory!
"TERFs hate men and perceive trans women as men"
"no they don't and you can tell because they hate trans women"
"but why"
"because they show that womanhood is not based in collective misery"
"okay so you don't believe Womanhood is a thing that objectively exists specifically because it's a defined category within an oppressive patriarchal society and that's the justification for how someone really can be a Woman in a material way rather than it simply being an internal sense of self"
"no I do believe that"
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH THERE ARE 387.44 MILLION MILES OF PRINTED CIRCUITS IN WAFER THIN LAYERS THAT FILL MY COMPLEX
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i just want to say, love the yellow one, but a lot of people think we're voting for techno because he's our favorite and not for gender reasons.
but y'all.
c!techno was what made me explore my gender. i spent most of my grown life being uncomfortable and not sure why. then i got exposed to this anarchist pig with a banger outfit and i was like 'oh! huh!' i cut my hair, dyed it, changed my pronouns and name. looking at some of the fanart is the closest i've ever gotten to 'yes THAT! exactly that!' when it comes to gender.
i'll also link a few of the very first from three years ago fanart that hit me the hardest:
#sorry for the personal ramble i just feel kinda bad ;__;#i swear i want him to win because to me..... he is the most gender......#and that gender is anarchy pig
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"There's a passage I got memorized. Ezekiel 25:17. "The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of the darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy My brothers. And you will know I am the Lord when I lay My vengeance upon you." Now... I been sayin' that shit for years. And if you ever heard it, that meant your ass. You'd be dead right now. I never gave much thought to what it meant. I just thought it was a cold-blooded thing to say to a motherfucker before I popped a cap in his ass. But I saw some shit this mornin' made me think twice. See, now I'm thinking: maybe it means you're the evil man. And I'm the righteous man. And Mr. 9mm here... he's the shepherd protecting my righteous ass in the valley of darkness. Or it could mean you're the righteous man and I'm the shepherd and it's the world that's evil and selfish. And I'd like that. But that shit ain't the truth. The truth is you're the weak. And I'm the tyranny of evil men. But I'm tryin', Ringo. I'm tryin' real hard to be the shepherd." Favorite Characters in Television & Film - Samuel L. Jackson as Jules Winnfield in Pulp Fiction (1994) dir. Quentin Tarantino
#Pulp Fiction#tvf#moviegifs#filmgifs#filmedit#filmdaily#tvandfilmdaily#dailytvfilmgifs#cinemapix#doyouevenfilm#fyeahmovies#dailyflicks#moviehub#filmcentral#junkfooddaily#quentin tarantino#gif#mine#made by me#photoset#gifs#gifset
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things i think about:
what if mobei jun has a type? what if he doesnt bow fealty to luo binghe because he's impressed by strength or beaten into submission or whatever. what if he noticed what an absolutely pathetic lil crybaby worm luo binghe can be and he's just Weak for a certain type of person okay
luo binghe crying in the endless abyss before he darkens and mobei jun just like "play it cool, no need to be nice, but ohno he's so pathetic, and ohno im attached"
and i fully mean this for pidw mobei jun as well LOL. you cannot convince me that bing-ge isn't also just as pathetic as bing-mei, he's just doing a better job of hiding it pffff
anyway, mobei jun just absolutely Torn Asunder by these pathetic two-faced men. he can't help it, they look so worthless and they're also such vindictive assholes and mobei jun has a Type
anyway onto the moshang of it all but like, what if shang qinghua catches onto the fact that mobei jun actually had a bit of a Thing for luo binghe (past tense) and he's like "oh fucking goddammit, well, this is inconvenient for everyone, but what my babygirl wants, my babygirl gets" and he proceeds to make various attempts to cause a bingqiu divorce, or at very least open up their marriage, because "if my king wants bing-mei, my king is gonna GET bing-mei! i dont owe cucumber-bro shit"
only, to mobei jun, shang qinghua's attempts to divorce bingqiu is making him think that shang qinghua has feelings for them and now he's Very Upset because look, he had a crush on luo binghe, but shang qinghua is endgame for him and now qinghua wants to be with someone else????
misunderstandings abound lmfao also shen yuan might beat the shit out of shang qinghua when he learns about his evil machinations lololol "IM IN A VERY HAPPY MONOGAMOUS MARRIAGE YOU ASSHOLE"
shang qinghua, lowkey after he fails to get bing-mei for mobei jun he's just like "i mean... cucumber bro mentioned something about the multiverse 🤔 maybe i can get my babygirl to bing-ge?"
mobei jun: ....please stop
(ofc shang qinghua is highkey heartbroken the whole way BUT HE IS DETERMINED OKAY, HE WILL SEE THIS THROUGH)
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It’s not a privilege to change every aspect of my personality and expression to not get yelled at by creepy men or to say “that’s not cool don’t say that” without as much backlash
Never mind the fact that I really don't know what this is responding to (and the fact that "without as much backlash" illustrates some acknowledgement of the privilege that comes with not being transfem), I think there is an illustrative rhetorical tactic I have seen a lot of TMRAs use (knowingly or not!).
In a lot of transandrophobia posts that aren't diatribes about how trans women are evil and need to shut up, you will notice a very normal thing: discussion of privilege as a thing that exists within society. You know, the idea some types of people have to deal with a whole host of troubles that people unaffected by those troubles can easily ignore to the point of often not knowing they exist until they are pointed out to them.
But then, when they send anon hate or replies or what have you to trans women, you will see those very same people pretend they don't know that definition of privilege, and will use one like this one here! Or will revert back to making "how can I have privilege when my life sucks" type arguments that normally come from people not used to discussing societal privilege.
It's really interesting!
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youtube
Since the new trailer for Poppy Playtime just dropped, I figured I'd do my own mini analysis of it! Let's do it:
SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT <3
I think TV guy is Dr. Harley Sawyer. We know from the ARG + some other stuff I don't remember from the top of my head that Sawyer was "out of commission", and poor baby Yarnaby was CRUSHED by it. Well! It wouldn't be weird if the Unethical Experiment Factory did an Unethical Experiment and used SAWYER for it as a punishment for an accident he caused.
The voice from TV guy + what he was saying + the flashing lines of text from the trailer + the trailer's title ("The Doctor") just add more confirmation. His behavior, initial confusion at becoming an experiment and later realization of what he can do seems to be in line for Sawyer, esp if we consider how almost cartoonishly evil he is in the ARG. Of course this rejected cartoon villain would say "the minds of men are easy to break" with THAT line delivery (btw. Props to the VA? Like? The line deliveries are SO pleasant to listen to, I fucking love a good evil-ish monologue).
Now. I believe Yarnaby will be loyal to Sawyer/TV Guy, and he was the one who attacked Kissy at the end of Chapter 3, following Sawyer's orders. This could explain why Poppy believed Catnap was the last obstacle to get to the Prototype: She was right, in a way. He was the last obstacle against the PROTOTYPE, but not the last obstacle the place had for them. She wasn't expecting was that Sawyer, someone the Prototype hates, would interfere with her plans.
If Poppy knows Sawyer was even an experiment to begin with or not, we don't know, but my current theory was that she had absolutely zero ideas about it. Poppy seems to like her plans, and she wouldn't risk Kissy's safety if she knew there was someone else to watch out for.
I believe Sawyer will try to either use Angel/the player for his own plans, or try to attack them as some sort of petty revenge. After all, Angel is an ex-worker, and TV guy seems to be really, REALLY mad at PlayCo ("What is this? / Wrong. This is wrong / You... / Backstabbing traitors!")
My theory is that Dr. Sawyer became TV guy as a punishment, and he may or may not be the one pretending to be Ollie. If it's not him, then it's the Prototype, and the Prototype COULD maybe help us/Poppy on getting rid of him? I'm not sure about Ollie at the moment. Poppy had no idea about him, and the guy is either going to use Angel, or hunt them for sport.
Thanks for reading this! See y'all soon <3
#poppy playtime#poppy playtime chapter 4#chapter 4 spoilers#poppy playtime chapter 4 spoilers#Youtube
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Jimmy from mouthwashing and Polyphemus, the cyclops who wronged him
a amateur analysis of Jimmys mindset
(very big yap session incoming)
When I think about the way Jimmy from mouthwashing views himself and the situation he led himself into because of his actions, it reminds me of a Greek tale.
I believe, in a way, Jimmy views himself as Odysseus and Curly/Anya/Pony Express as the cyclops, Polyphemus.
Odysseus, our hero, ends up on an island after winning the Trojan war and finally heading home after a long 10 year battle. Him and his men walk onto the island finding a cave with food and sheep inside. The men help themselves to this food in a hopes their assumed host wouldn’t mind and would accept wine as a form of gift/reimbursement for what they take. Finally, the owner of the cave comes home, who is revealed to be a giant cyclops, not very happy to see a bunch of strangers eating his food and taking his sheep. In a fit of anger(depending on the version of the story you read) he antagonizes/attacks the crew ending in the death of either a few or a couple hundred men. He eventually falls asleep which leads Odysseus into grabbing the monsters club and have the remainder of his men shave it into a stake and shoving it into the monsters eye. Leaving him blind. The men escape after taking more and leaving the cyclops to fend for himself.
Obviously, you’re supposed to see Polyphemus as a villain. He unjustly killed many men for a seemingly simple mistake, which Odysseus recognizes, they didn’t know he would react badly to his food/sheep being taken, they believed he was someone who would be willing to lend a hand and be willing to accept their wine as a gift to him. An eye for an eye. Odysseus lost his men for something that could’ve been solved if Polyphemus had just taken what they were willing to give.
Do you see where I’m going with this?
Jimmy views himself as someone who made a simple, fixable mistake. And is being unfairly punished for it by this monster who has so much more power than Jimmy. Who should’ve accepted the apology he was willing to give. Jimmy is Odysseus, this misunderstood war hero who was just trying to feed his men, who was trying to keep the peace with this monster who wanted to hurt him for what he had done, which could’ve been solved.
Curly/Pony express in jimmy’s great Greek tragedy are the side of Polyphemus who is a brutal and evil cyclops who felt the need to punish and hurt him for what he had done. This monster who was willing to kill him for something he didn’t mean to do. This monster who towered over Jimmy, who was this powerless mortal with no gods on his side.
Anya is the side of Polyphemus who should’ve forgiven Jimmy, who should’ve taken the wine, shut up and let him go free. But no, he had to argue back, so he lost his only eye. Being left disabled, with no way to see. Who was left to rot alone without a second thought because he didn’t care about this monster who tried to hurt him. Why would he?
because jimmy is the great greek hero after all, caged and misunderstood by the gods. Trying to make it home to his simple life in Ithaca.
fuck you, Jimmy.
(I hope this makes sense, this has been on the back of my brain for a while and needed to get this out of my head and out there, if you guys have any opinions on this I’d love to hear, I’m not very good at getting my words out and I like to hear other people’s thought on stuff like this :) )
#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#mouthwashing analysis#mouthwashing jimmy#mouthwashing anya#mouthwashing curly#jimmy mouthwashing#anya mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#pony express#i hope this makes sense#:p
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I always repeat it but I truly love the way you write Leona ☹️ you portray not only his personality but also his inner thoughts and how he processes information around him so well... I love all your writings but specially your Leona related works (sorry for being very much biased)
I hold your Leona interpretation so close to my heart 🤲💛 I often see a lot of mischaracterization (and I kind of get it- he's hard to decipher sometimes), so seeing such a good portrayal that I feel encapsulates his whole being is so important to me ☹️☹️
[Not sure if this is feedback in response to a particular writing piece I did, but just in case, this Leona interaction was the most recent one before receiving this ask.]
cbjddbwkkeoqhd Thank you!! I try to do the same thing Yana did when first conceptualizing the Twst characters… I try to put myself in their shoes and wonder what it must be like to be them in a given situation. The example Yana provided in one interview was something along the lines of, The poison apple didn’t want to be poisonous, but the Evil Queen forced it to. How did that make the apple feel? I want to think about not only how someone would speak, but also about their body language, their thoughts, their emotions, previous interactions in similar scenarios, their life experiences, their goals, their strengths and their flaws, how those can color their perception of others and the world--everything that makes up a character! I also aim to make my dialogue distinguishable, even if there's no name attached to it. If you can swap out several other character's names and the dialogue still works, then the intended character's voice isn't coming through strong enough and I rewrite it from scratch. If I write "You've earned my brother's respect," that's not good enough for me. It has to be “Oh, would you look at that. You’ve gone and earned my dear onii-sama’s respect and admiration. How good for you," to properly convey Leona's sarcasm and haughtiness.
The Twst characters are all very complex and multifaceted (particularly those we're given the most detailed backstories about *stares at the OB boys*), and there's also tons of content to comb through between the all the characters, main story, vignettes, events, and additional materials (interviews, art books, mangas, light novel, etc.). As a result, it can be easy to overlook elements of a particular character or to simplify/condense characters--either making them the extreme of being too cruel or the other extreme of being too kind--to make them easier to write. It takes time to nail that characterization, so I encourage my fellow writers to keep trying ^^
To speak a little more about writing Leona! It's honestly hard because you have to balance his arrogance with his lack of motivation and his depression-like beliefs about himself without whiplashing between those components. He's also very intelligent, and those kinds of characters can be difficult to do, especially for inexperienced writers. Leona works in subtle ways to get what he wants, and you have to find a way to communicate that between himself and the reader, but not give away what he's scheming to the other characters involved, who are not in his headspace. Then, of course, there's that whole ongoing debate about whether Leona would treat women significantly "better" than men (which is a topic worthy of a whole separate discussion post; I won't get into that here since it would elongate this post by a ton)... There's several things to consider when writing him. If you enjoy my interpretation of Leona, then that makes me happy ^^ I genuinely do put forth a lot of effort to capture the characters in my writing, so it's nice when those efforts are recognized.
#twisted wonderland#twst#disney twisted wonderland#disney twst#Leona Kingscholar#notes from the writing raven#feedback for the writing raven
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@lamentationsofalonelypotato
LOLL girl I totally get it, but I don't think you have to be scared on this one. It's a nice little slow burn fic with cozy winter vibes. 😘 And like you, I LOVE soulmate/true mate/fates mate AUs too. It's definitely a mix of forced proximity and grumpy/sunshine, which you know I can't stop writing that dynamic for some reason. 😂😂
But here we go!! Diving into the rest of your lovely comments...
The physical description of Dean is SO good. The use of "stern" and "stubborn" as descriptors fits well for Dean.
Hahaaa thank you, lovely!! Stern brows and a stubborn chin felt inherently Dean to me.
Oh suuuurrrreeee keep telling yourself that Dean.
Lmfao right? Denial of the purest form. 🙄
So what you're saying is... she's trapped in a cabin, she's got a broken ankle, in the middle of a snowstorm with no way out and no communications, with a ruggedly hot mountain man with gorgeous green eyes, a gruff exterior, and a mysterious past... Sign👏🏻 Me👏🏻 Up
That is EXACTLY what I'm saying. 😏
(Also that How to Train Your Dragon gif made me smile -- I love that movie!!)
So ready for Dean to just obliterate all her other experiences with total jerks.
Oh he already is! You def know where I'm going with this. 😏
I live for the after a nightmare comfort trope (if it is a trope? 🧐) and I am SO happy you put this in. Oh my goodness it was so sweet of him to come check on her, and for you to give us a little bit of insight inside of Dean's POV during those moments where she was terrified. This part stuck out to me, because the man is already hook, line, and sinker. He literally tried to go to a cabin in the middle of the woods to get away from it all, but fate really has an odd way of catching up to you. Can't exactly run from it Dean.
Aww me too!! I love hurt/comfort moments almost as much as pure fluff moments. Dean really is fighting for his life emotionally in this loll. His instincts as an alpha (and her mate) are warring with his brain, and it was really fun to write that aspect of Dean's angst post-season 15.
OOooooooOOOooooo shots fired. SHOTS FIRED... But did she stutter??
She, in fact, did NOT stutter.
I'm losing it over the fact that Sam named his son DEAN Jr. 😂🥰 And also the bit about "running full speed into glass doors" is making me cackle lol.
Ahaha idk if that was actually canon or if that's something we in the fandom started writing and I just rolled with it. 😂 I'm pretty sure it's canon that Sam named his son after his uncle? But oh yeah, the running full speed into glass doors was taken straight out of my childhood. 🤣🤣
This line is so Dean, it's PERFECT, and I really love that it was what made the reader try to snort her diet Pepsi.
LOL thank you!! I think I grabbed part of it from season 12 where they go to Hollywood/L.A., but I thought it was quintessential Dean. 🤣
And I just want to say thank you for giving Dean the kinda "homemaker" role in this fic. The fact that he's making food for the reader (I'm obsessed with men who can cook) and taking care of her is just:
Omg yeesss, I love malewife Dean lmao. He's just such a caretaker at heart, and an awesome cook! I can so picture him making big breakfasts for his kids on weekends and packing their lunches for school. 🥹
Oh no Dean, you're not like the Cabin in that way. The cabin is made of strong aged wood that keeps out the chill and is full of warmth! The cabin withstands the elements and doesn't fall no matter how hard the howling wind blows! Dang it, I have way too many emotions over that line. Alex, why did you have to do this to me 😭 It's SO GOOD!!
Dean's self-deprecating angst is like a necessary evil for his character. I'm so glad the cabin metaphor resonated with you the way I intended, even if it breaks my heart too!! 😭😭💙💙
And I'm not sure if you were trying to say that the reader was also a little skeptical about the true mates and if it is a real thing that happens, but I can't wait for part 2 to see if they actually admit it to each other or if they try to keep it a secret as long as they can! Also the song choice perfectly fits the vibes in this fic 👌🏻
Oh yeah, there's some of that too! She's more open to it now than Dean, but I thought we needed some realism where she's also skeptical true mates are even real -- until she met Dean. How strongly they both are reacting to each other physically, but not wanting to admit it yet, and the reader just wanting to know more about Dean before she begins to trust him, all of that is going to continue playing out in Part 2. 💓💓
Oh thank you on the song choice!! Of course Bob Seger has featured on the show in a big way with "Night Moves," so I thought "Against the Wind" felt very Dean, especially in a post-S15 AU.
My lovely friend, this was so good and I can't wait for part 2!!!
Thank you sooooo very much, my friend!! 🥹🥹 Part 2 is dropping later today!! 🥳💕💕
Against the Wind - Part 1
Pairing: Alpha!Dean Winchester x F. Omega!Reader
Summary: You wake up in a strange alpha’s cabin in the middle of a snowstorm, all with a busted ankle. He holds shadows in his eyes, even though his hands are gentle. There are iron shutters around his heart, even though he saved you. You might just save him in return.
AN: This is a canon ending-divergent AU, but still an Omegaverse story within the canon world. It also fulfills a bingo square for @jacklesversebingo!
Jacklesverse Bingo24 Prompt: True Mates
Song Inspo: “Against the Wind” by Bob Seger
Word Count: 5.5K
Tags/Warnings: A/B/O dynamics, scenting, injuries, hints of angst, fluff and feels.
Series Masterlist || Bingo Masterlist
Part 1: In His Hands
Your body is mostly numb when he pulls you out of the snow.
You utter a sharp cry when something in your side twinges, waking up your entire body like a white-hot shiv. Your ankle begins to throb as well.
“Hold on. I’ve got you.”
You only half hear the voice, a deep, coarse rumble. His form is broad and dark and blurry, but his male scent is the only thing you register with perfect clarity.
Alpha.
A small treble of alarm runs through you. It’s an instinct you’ve had to learn, as an omega traveling alone in rural Montana. However, something else disrupts that anxiety.
It’s his scent. His scent is like the crackle and smoke of a warm hearth.
Safe. Your body is heavy and stiff and doesn’t respond to your commands, and yet, you feel a measure of calm when he maneuvers you into his arms. It’s a baser instinct, rooted deep in your chest. He begins to carry you down the slope of the mountain, and your vision blurs white…
Like the flurry of snow falling heavy on his jacket.
You wake up freezing and shivering in pain. A sensation of small sharp needles begins to travel all across your skin. Slowly, as you're able to blink, your view of the dark wood cabin clears and focuses. You realize that you’re bundled in blankets, and laying on a chaise in front of a large fireplace. Still, you’re too cold. A keening whimper escapes you as you try to burrow in.
Alpha. Your body instinctively recognizes his presence, as he’s suddenly there, hovering close above you with a divot between his brows and a frown marring his face, where thick stubble threatens to become a beard. Stern, dark brows are furrowed over his concerned eyes. His plush frown is framed by a stubborn-looking chin. Your gaze wearily travels over his handsome features, his short brown hair, the flickers of firelight that splash across the side of his face.
He places a warm, calloused hand on your forehead, and he mutters a curse. Your body trembles further with cold. You part your lips, but you can't yet force your voice to escape them.
Again, he quite literally takes the problem into his own hands. He peels away the thick blankets just to slide himself in behind you. His arms wrap around your waist, and you feel their tempered strength when they cage you in against him. You manage to turn your head and rest your cheek against his chest, covered by red plaid. Thank you...
Almost on reflex, you breathe in his scent deeply. The earthiness of it calms you, warms you from the inside. Your shivering eventually calms and turns to purring in your chest.
“What’s your name, Omega?” he asks. His voice is deep and gruff, and it threatens to make you shiver for a different reason as the timbre of it washes over you.
It’s difficult, but you manage to speak, clearing past your parched throat to give him your name. He nods, as if rolling the sound of it back and forth across his mind.
“Was somebody out there with you?” he asks.
You shake your head, even though the thought elicits a painful twinge in your heart.
“Who…” you try to speak again, even though it hurts a little. “Who are you?”
You feel him take a deep breath. He hesitates, like he’s reluctant to give it to you.
“Dean,” he says.
You roll the name around in your head, over and over. Dean, Dean, Dean…
You smile slightly. “Yeah, makes sense.”
“What?” he says. You hear the raised brow in his tone.
“You sound like a Dean,” you say, perhaps a little delirious.
Anyway, that’s when your eyes close on you again. You fall back into the warm lull of sleep, to the sound of a crackling fire, and a feeling that permeates throughout your body.
Safe.
Can’t fucking believe this, Dean thinks, as he holds you. Just when he thought his life was done throwing him curveballs.
He tips his head back against the sofa cushion with a tired exhale. It would just be his luck to find a stray omega wandering his stretch of Big Sky. Montana can be gnarly in the winter, but for the past couple of years, Dean has learned to survive here in this rental cabin for a couple of months at a time, when wandering an empty bunker gets to be too much. At least here the quiet’s peaceful, if still a little unnerving sometimes.
He glances down at you. Now that you’re warm and sleeping again, he should find something to wrap your ankle and ice it down. It’s swollen, and he wants to take an inventory of your other injuries, so he can determine how to get you back down the mountain and through the woods, back to civilization.
The sooner he gets you medical attention and back to your life, the sooner he can get back to his—even though the thought of leaving you in anyone else’s hands almost stirs a growl in his throat.
And that last part unnerves him, makes him anxious. He begins to untangle himself from you, but his movements falter when your sweet scent filters through his nose again. Cinnamon apples, with a hint of something floral.
Fuck me.
It’s almost too sweet to be true, but Dean does his best to ignore it…and what that alluring sweetness probably means.
Dean leaves you in the morning to revisit the site where you fell. He digs through the snow and manages to find your backpack, filled with your clothes, supplies, and your phone and wallet. He returns just in time.
The falling snow becomes even more intense, until it becomes a quiet roar outside. You watch the snowstorm through the impact windows in the kitchen, and you know what this means. You’re snowed in with a stranger—an alpha, no less.
You also have a bum ankle, which he wrapped for you. Doesn’t feel broken, he’d said, but it could be fractured, or at the very least sprained. You also likely have a couple of cracked ribs.
“What were you doing out there, anyway?” he asks, while pouring himself a glass of whiskey. “This ain’t exactly hiking season.”
While you drink some hot chocolate he made you with a bit of whiskey splashed in (for extra warmth), you explain.
“Well, I guess it wasn’t my best idea in hindsight,” you say with a weak chuckle. “I was trying to find my way back, and I…well, I was a bit lost.”
He raises his brows wryly, still sipping.
“And to make a great situation even better, I thought I heard a wolf howl nearby,” you say. “I know most of them would rather run from us than attack us, but you can’t be sure, you know? I had my rifle on me, so I was turning around, trying to pinpoint what direction it was in…and of course, my foot slipped on something.”
You fell down that hill. You think you even hit a tree on the way down, which would explain your ribs. Everything gets a bit swirly, cold, and dark in your memory after that.
Dean shakes his head. “Gotta say, going out there alone wasn’t a great idea either, especially now. This time of year, there’s no telling when a blizzard like this is going to come through.”
He waves haphazardly toward the storm raging outside. Your gaze falls to the mug in your hands. You don’t really want to talk about your reasons for taking that risk, but maybe giving him a little honesty will get him off your back.
“My dad and I used to hike up here every year,” you confess. “A few months ago…I lost him. So I guess this was just something I needed to do.”
You blow on your hot chocolate before you take another sip. This time when you glance up, Dean’s judgy expression has evened out into something more sympathetic. He lowers his glass.
“Well, hate to break it to you, but there’s no cell service up here,” he says.
You give a humorless huff. “Believe me, I know.”
“Which means no one can come up here and get you,” he continues, “and even when this storm breaks, I can’t carry you all the way down the mountain back to civilization. Not with the snow as deep as it’s gonna get. Now…maybe I can go down by myself and bring help back with me.”
“But another storm could snow me in,” you realize, with growing apprehension at the thought.
Dean nods. “It’s either I take that chance, leave you by yourself. Or we wait for you to heal up.”
He leaves the choice up to you with a gesture of his hand, the one still wrapped around his glass. You weigh those options with a tilt of your head. On one hand, you don't want to impose on him longer than you had to, but on the other, you really don't want to be left alone in this cabin for God knows how long while he scales the mountain by himself, for your sake.
“I think it would be better if we go down together, right? It can be dangerous, even when the storm breaks,” you reply.
Dean nods slowly, like that was what he was going to suggest too. “All right. Well, until you’ve got two working legs, you’re stuck here with me.”
“I figured as much,” you say. Your head tilts as you consider him. He has a gruff exterior, but all his actions so far have been kind, and far more than you’d expect from a stranger. And an alpha at that.
Not to say that all alpha's are assholes, but you've had far too many experiences with the stereotype: arrogant, entitled, and handsy. Can't forget handsy.
“Thank you for saving me,” you say, meeting his gaze, “and for…well, being a decent guy.”
Dean’s lips twitch. He nearly chuckles. Instead, he sits back on his side of the couch.
“Yeah, well, there’s a spare room in this place for you, one bathroom. The kitchen is stocked. I’m a half-decent cook, if I say so myself, but help yourself.”
He gets up from the couch without preamble, to go to his room, you assume. It leaves you feeling at a loss, like he’s trying to get away from you. You know you’re a guest in his space, so you try to respect the way he wants to be alone for a while. He definitely gives off loner vibes.
You look around and find a collection of vinyl records, and smaller collection of books on a shelf next to the fireplace. You find Gulliver’s Travels, Dune, The Odyssey, The Wizard of Oz—books you didn’t think a guy like Dean would be into.
You take up The Wizard of Oz, reclaim your spot on the chaise, and start reading.
That night, your dreams are plagued by the crunch of dead leaves, your father shouting at you to run, and to keep running.
The coarse roar of a bear morphs into something other. It’s a sharper, whirring sound like wind howling amidst animalistic clicking, and then bones breaking—your father’s scream cut short.
You wake with a start, your body both cold and flush at the same time.
Dean is there once again. It confuses you at first, but then it all returns to you in a rush—the where and the why you’re here, once again with the alpha standing over you in concern. He grasps your shoulder and asks if you’re all right. Your breathing is too erratic for you to answer him, your eyes too wide, your body trembling.
Had you been making noise in your sleep? You blush in embarrassment at the thought. You also feel bad for waking him, and all those things get trapped in your throat.
Seeing that you’re most definitely not fine, he sits on the edge of the bed, squeezes your arm, and reminds you.
“It’s okay. You’re safe here,” he tells you. His tone is deep and even, reassuring.
You meet his steady gaze and manage to nod, trying to catch your breath.
“I’m okay,” you say, with a shaky nod. He gives you a measuring look, both a question and a confirmation. You give it to him with a firmer nod. “Thanks, I…I’m sorry I woke you up.”
He exhales through his nose, accepting. “‘S all right. Don’t worry about it.”
You feel the loss of his touch when his hand eventually slip away from your shoulder. As soon as he came into your room, he’s gone.
Dean leaves swiftly, trying to brush off how the scent of your fear had tugged sharply at his gut even in his sleep. It not only woke him up, but compelled him to kick his blankets off and get out of bed to go to you.
You were having a nightmare, reliving your fall, if he had to guess. You came out of it pretty quick when he carefully grabbed your shoulder. Every instinct in his body told him to gather you into his arms and cover you with his own scent and protective embrace to calm you down.
Through sheer willpower, he managed to ignore every single one of those instincts.
Two days pass, in which you and Dean say very little to one another, besides when he asks you what you want to eat, and how you’re feeling. The alpha seems genuine, but guarded any time you ask him about him; anything that’ll give you a clue into who this guy is, and why he’s here.
You try again to strike up some kind of conversation over dinner one night.
“Do you live here year-round?” you ask, around a mouthful of burger that’s absolutely delicious. He wasn’t lying when he claimed to be a good cook. He even made the fries himself.
“No,” he replies. “No Netflix, no internet? Think I’d die of boredom. I just come up here to uh…take a beat, I guess.”
You smile. “I don’t blame you. Sometimes you just need a break,” you say, even though your tone is heavier than you meant it to be. Your gaze, a bit distant in that moment, sharpens and focuses back on Dean. “Where are you from, then?”
“Kansas,” he offers.
“Oh really?” You brighten with that scrap of information. “My older sister lives in Topeka. She moved there for a job, initially, but then she met her guy. He’s some kind of day trader. Which is just code for sits on his ass playing Call of Duty while she busts hers.”
Dean huffs, then crams more burger into his mouth. He hasn’t been giving you a lot to go on while you two have been talking. Unfortunately, you have the tendency to ramble and fill the silence before it becomes even more stifled.
“She works at a bank. Smart, driven, always knows what she wants. Meanwhile, I’ve had about seven jobs in the last three years, none of which were even remotely related to my almost useless degree in Communications.”
“Yeah, doubt you need a degree in communicating,” Dean remarks, popping another fry into his mouth.
You purse your lips at him, but the glint of teasing in his eyes makes you fight not to smile.
“All right, smart guy. So, what about you?” you ask.
Predictably, the man’s walls firm back up. “What about me?”
“Well…why’re you up here alone? Do you have family?” you ask.
Dean quirks a half smile. “I’ve got a brother.”
“Okay. Younger, I’m guessing?”
He tilts his head at you, a bit amused at your guess. “Why’s that?”
“I don’t know,” you shrug. “I can’t imagine you with a brother who’s older than you.”
His lips twitch. “You callin’ me old, sweetheart?”
You begin to blush with embarrassment. But also, sweetheart?
You shake your head. “No, that’s not what I meant. I just mean like…”
Dean saves you with the return of his smile.
“Yeah, he’s younger,” he says. “But he’s the one with the quasi-wife and the apple pie life.”
“Quasi-wife?”
“They’re mated. Just haven’t gotten around to the whole getting hitched thing,” he explains. “But they’re happy. Dean Jr.’s growing up fast, already running full speed into glass doors.”
His smile is genuine when he talks about his brother, just tinged with a bit of melancholy, you think.
“Dean Jr.?” you ask in amusement. Dean Sr. laughs a little, and you enjoy the sound, the way it lightens up his face and pulls at the corners of his eyes.
“Yeah, can’t say I wasn’t surprised myself to get that honor, but…hey, it works for the kid. He’s got my chin,” he remarks.
He digs into his pocket to show you a picture from his cell phone. Even though it doesn’t have service, you can still view the many pictures of the adorable infant in his camera roll, courtesy of Sam and his mate, Eileen. You coo at the chubby cheeks, the bright little eyes, and the swirled tuft of dark hair on his head.
“Where do they live?” you ask.
“Out west, a stone’s throw from the City of Angels.” Dean’s smile dims. “He just had to go back to California.”
“What’s wrong with California?” you ask.
“It’s full of pretentious douchebags, that’s what,” he says, his voice a dry whip. “Waxed up to the fucking eyeballs, smelling like Botox, Adderall, and sweaty desperation.”
You splutter laughing so bad that your diet coke escapes you in a spit take. It partially goes up into your nose, burning, stinging your eyes, but it’s made worse by the way Dean waves a hand up incredulously. You’ve just gotten half his sleeve wet.
He meets your gaze, and you can’t help but laugh even harder.
“Wow,” he says.
“God, I’m sorry,” you say, still giggling. You get up, hobble over to the kitchen counter, and rip off a paper towel to try and pat his arm dry. He takes it from you and helps you back into your seat.
“I got it, Spit Take. Just finish your food,” he says, if with a dancing gleam in his eyes.
From then on, it becomes easier for you to pull the alpha into conversation. Besides reading, napping, and staring out the window while it snows, you don’t have much by way of entertainment. Not to mention the pain of trying to get around without crutches, as it also jostles your ribs. Dean often has to help you from one room to another, which of course, you get embarrassed by.
“I’m sorry!” you yelp, when he saves you from another crash landing in the hallway. You’re fresh out of a shower, and it had taken you twenty minutes just to figure out how to wash your hair on one leg, let alone dry yourself off and get your shirt and borrowed sweatpants on. The main problem in getting back to your room happened to be the pants themselves. Their length and bagginess made you slip.
At least Dean’s learned to ignore your apologies. He now holds you by the waist, having pulled you against his chest on reflex. With furrowed brows, he notices your pained hiss when you grab onto his arms for balance.
“You okay?” he asks with a note of alarm.
“Ribs,” you gasp. They’re throbbing sharply with his hold, especially after being rattled by the near fall.
He immediately adjusts his hold lower, holding your arm and hip to support you. His hands are strong, but gentle. The warmth and pressure of his touch rattles you more than almost falling into a heap. Cliché as it might be, your heart is beating faster, what seems like in and out of rhythm. A feeling you can’t name stirs and tugs at your lower belly when you hazard looking up into his eyes. They’re a nice shade of green, like a forest floor in the spring.
“You just go ass over tea kettle at any moment, huh?” he quips, his lips tugging upward. “Come on. Where were you headed?”
“To my room, wise guy,” you say wryly, even as your blush heats your face and neck. “But this is a great taxi service.”
He snorts. “Yeah, call it the Winchestermobile.”
“Winchester. That your last name? Like the rifle?” you ask, while he helps you carefully down the hall. He nods in confirmation.
“That’s interesting. You don’t meet many Winchesters,” you remark.
“Yeah, well, ain’t that many left,” he mutters.
“What?”
“Nothing,” he shakes his head, easing you down onto the edge of the bed. His hands go to his hips as he scrutinizes your form for further injury. “You good? I was about to get cracking on some lunch.”
You offer him a grateful smile. “Yeah, I’m good. What’s on the menu?”
“Nothing fancy. I’m thinking grilled cheese. Maybe some tomato soup, assuming I can find a can in the pantry,” he says.
“Honestly, that sounds awesome,” you say. “Haven’t had a grilled since…God, probably since I was a kid.”
At that, Dean smiles. “Well, I happen to make an awesome one. No less than three kinds of cheese.”
“If they’re as good as your burgers, then I don’t doubt it,” you reply. He seems pleased at that, and maybe a little bashful as his gaze falls away.
Cute, you think. Your smile grows.
“All right, well, stay tuned,” he says. He winks, tossing you a “gun for hand” gesture that makes you laugh. Dean wears a rugged exterior as easily as his winter jacket, but he’s also kind of a dork.
After lunch (delicious, as you predicted), you take the afternoon just to sort through Dean’s records and alphabetize them for him. You hunker down on the floor in front of the shelf, close to the record player.
“I don’t need all that. I know where all my stuff is…more or less,” he says, with a lazy wave of the beer he has in hand.
“Oh really?” you raise a brow. “Okay, let’s test that theory. Where’s Boston.”
“Right next to the White Album, there on the left.”
Sure enough, you find Boston, as well as the White Album by the Beatles.
“Oh my God, you actually have the White Album?” You open up the double-sided case in excitement to read the list of songs printed on the inside. “This thing is so expensive.”
“Beatles fan, huh?” Dean says as he takes a seat on the couch. You turn your smile on him, and he stills in his seat.
“Uh, yeah. Who isn’t?” you say.
Dean shrugs with a smile of his own. “Put it on if you want.”
You bounce a little with excitement before you figure out how to turn on his record player. You put the vinyl album on Side B, moving the needle until you find “Blackbird.”
“Of course,” Dean says, slightly teasing. You turn to him with crunched brows.
“What? ‘Blackbird’s’ a classic.”
“Eh. Everyone likes ‘Blackbird.’”
“That’s what a classic means,” you argue.
“More like a mainstream copout,” he says. You think it’s just to needle you, but you still purse your lips.
“Fine, Mr. Music Snob. Then what’s your favorite?”
“On the White Album?”
“Any Beatles song.”
“‘Hey, Jude,’” he says, after a moment. There’s some kind of weight in his eyes, a note of melancholy. You don’t miss it, even though you don’t know why it’s there.
“Everyone likes ‘Hey, Jude,’” you quip, trying to lighten him.
He smiles a little. “Yeah. Fair enough.”
Finally, the snowstorm breaks. Dean ventures outside and brings you back a long, sturdy stick to lean your weight on when you want to move around, though he claims he’s working on a better solution. Now that the snow has let up, he’ll be able to go out to the shed and do some work.
Whatever that means, you think.
You watch him from the living room when he goes outside to chop some more firewood.
He should really wear a hat. His brown hair is getting dusted white with snow flurries as he continues to swing down the ax. You notice the power in his tall frame, even covered by layers of his jacket, pants, and boots. You almost feel each chop of the wood resonate in your chest.
Heat rises in your cheeks when he looks up, as if he senses he’s being watched. You bow your head and pretend to read your book.
His boots continue to crunch in the snow as he makes trips back and forth from the surrounding forest. Aside from the firewood, he brings back a few long, thinner logs that he takes to the shed. Soon you begin to hear the steady back-and-forth cutting of a saw. You wish you could go out there and take a look, but you can’t even get around the house that easily, let alone venture outside.
Your curiosity about this man knows no bounds, and you decide to use the walking stick he found for you in the meantime to get around without putting pressure on your injured ankle. You know it’s wrong, but you end up traversing the long, dark hallway, pushing open the door to the right, and venturing into Dean’s room.
It smells like him, earthy and tinged with smoke. His scent is seeped into every part of it—the bed, the dresser and nightstands, the dark blue bedsheets, the desk and chair, and even the drapes. It makes you almost lightheaded at the pleasurable feeling of it washing over you.
A shudder suddenly runs down your spine and tugs at your core in arousal. With a sharp intake of breath, you have to shift on your feet, pressing your legs together against the slick already forming down below.
You’re shocked and embarrassed at first. You aim to bolt out of his room, but you stop short in the doorway as it dawns on you.
Your sister is a beta, and so is her husband. She’s never completely understood you as an omega. She never understood your parents either, or the bond they had. She always scoffed at the idea of “true mates.”
Soulmates. It was fantasy and myth, the stuff of cheesy Harlequin novels.
Growing up, you’d agreed with her, even though a part of you deep down always protested. It wanted to tell her not to open her mouth about something she knew nothing about, and would never know.
The day you met Dean, you knew she was wrong.
Your more logical mind tries again to reassert itself though. You remind yourself that you barely know anything about this man, no matter how attractive, kind, funny, enigmatic…
And yet, you can’t shake that part of you that doesn’t rest until you see his face in the morning; until you make him coffee and eat breakfast together, and take any opportunity to pull more threads from him. It’s more than passing attraction. It’s more than just being stuck together in this cabin, unable to escape each other. You know, because the feeling scares you, and it electrifies your blood at the same time.
All these thoughts go through your mind when you turn back around. Slowly, you continue to look around his room, your whole body tingling. The room is neat, more or less, with everything in its proper place. It’s pretty bare though, décor wise. There’s a desk with a few scattered books and a journal sandwiched in between. A smile of surprise forms across your face.
No. Don’t tell me this guy is Mr. Dear Diary? you think in amusement. Though you wonder if it’s another way he passes his time here, especially when he’s holed up in his room.
You know you shouldn’t be snooping, let alone contemplating what you’re about to do…but you can’t help yourself. Biting your lip, you slide out the journal and begin to flip through it.
You frown at the strange drawings and odd entries—dates, narratives, scraps of information on different types of mythological creatures, and even more strange, on how to kill them.
What the hell is this?
That’s when you hear the front door swing open. You bolt from his room as quick as you can, not realizing you took the journal with you in your haste. You stuff it up your sweater and pretend like you’ve just come out of the bathroom on the way back to your room. There you slide the journal under your pillow. You jump when Dean knocks on your door.
“Hey,” he greets.
The jolting pains your ribs, and your hand goes to your left side in a hiss.
“You okay?” he asks, brows furrowing in concern. He takes a step into your room, but you turn to him with a nod and a placating hand.
“Yeah, I’m fine. You just scared me,” you say, with a bit of nervous laughter.
He gives a half smile. “Sorry. Just come ‘ere a sec. I wanna show you something.”
He reaches out a hand to help guide you to the living room.
There he presents you with two rudimentary crutches. Your eyes widen as your free hand passes over the smooth chestnut color of the wood. Dean keeps a light hold on your elbow, just in case.
“You made these?” you ask.
“Yeah, just a bit of woodworking. Picked it up over the last couple of years,” he says.
He’s downplaying it, but you’re nothing short of marveling. You set aside the walking stick in favor of picking up the crutches, and they’re even the right size to position them under your arms.
“Now you don’t have to hobble around like Long John Silver,” Dean quips. You meet the sight of his grin with a raised brow, but you soon begin to smile. When you get close enough to him, you lean the crutches against the couch and give him a warm hug, resting your head on his chest.
“Thank you,” you say. It’s something he was wholly unprepared for, but he hugs you back with a chuckle.
“Uh, you’re welcome.”
Just then, he tries not to inhale your scent. He tries not to focus on the feeling of your body pressed soft and warm against his. You fit just right.
After a beat, you have mercy on him and pull away. You take your crutches back up and continue to walk around the living room experimentally.
“You think I’d be okay trying to go outside?” you ask on your way to the door. Dean tenses.
“Uh, I don’t think—”
But you’re already halfway out the door. He shakes his head and follows you with swift strides. He watches you step out carefully onto the porch like a baby deer. He cleared the snow this morning from the deck and the steps, but he’s more concerned when he sees you considering how you might step out onto the snow.
“Stay on the porch, all right, Bambi,” he warns. “You’re not wearing snow boots and it’s still pretty deep. Not to mention, I’ve been keeping an eye out for a bear that wandered through here last week—”
You turn to look at him over your shoulder in amusement.
“Okay, Alpha. Calm down,” you say playfully. “I’m not gonna go ass over tea kettle.”
His brow twitches as he frowns. Alpha. He fights not to show his reaction to the way you said it; it calls to his baser instincts, almost stirring a rumble in his chest.
Cheeky little omega.
You keep to the porch, but regardless, you’re happy. You don’t even mind the cold. You see your breath on the air, and you tip your head back, closing your eyes with a smile as the sunshine warms your face. You inhale through your nose and let it out slowly in contentment.
“It’s a good day, Dean,” you say quietly.
You don’t realize that he’s watching you with a more reserved smile on his face. When he realizes it, he shakes his head at himself. He’s only been here a week with you, and it’ll probably take a couple more for your ankle to heal up well enough for you to walk again, let alone get down the mountain.
He doesn’t want to leave you alone up here, so he’ll have to somehow keep fending off your probing questions into his past and personal life. There's a lifetime of blood, nightmares, and death that he just can't let you see behind his eyes.
Hell, he's been trying to shove it all down for the past year—in booze and odd jobs and trips to nowhere, always coming back to an empty bunker. He still wonders how Sam's managed to do it, to move on, and build a new life for himself.
If Dean's honest (and he's not), he feels a bit like this cabin; old, falling apart, and forgotten.
But he’ll have to keep taking in your brightness and warmth, continue arguing with you about music and other inane shit, and pretend that every small touch of yours doesn’t ignite his skin. That it doesn’t make him have to beat down every instinct he has to pull you into his body and blanket you with his scent, ravage you, claim you, and make you his.
He never thought this would happen to him. He never thought someone like you was out there…for someone like him.
He knows it though, deep in his gut. You’re meant for him. You’re meant to be his mate.
Which means he’s already screwed.
AN: And we're off! Special thanks again to Michelle (@luci-in-trenchcoats) for being my sounding board when I was first writing this series. Let me know what you think of Part 1! 💜
Next Time:
I buried my wife today. Even as I write that down, I don’t believe it. Last week we were a normal family…eating dinner, going to Dean’s T-ball game, buying toys for baby Sammy. But in an instant, it all changed…
When I try to think back, get it all straight in my head…I feel like I’m going crazy. Like someone ripped both my arms off, plucked my eyes out. I’m wandering around, alone and lost and I can’t do anything.
This is Dean’s father, you realize. The more that you read, with no small amount of dismay, you also realize that this man is writing about his wife, Mary.
Dean’s mom…
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I've been rereading your "Gabriel redemption/corruption/canon mess of ideas post", and I remembered an old idea of mine: Gabriel driven insane by the Butterfly miraculous.
This is an artifact that allows you to sense the negative emotions of All of Paris. And then mentally connect to the person in whom the negative emotions are currently strongest.
It's less about "can this power drive anyone insane" it's more about "is there a chance this power wouldn't drive anyone insane?"
Worse, Gabriel uses this power constantly. Gabriel uses this power for shady purposes. Gabriel uses this power when already in an unstable state after losing his wife.
From a storytelling point, this neatly explains:
1) why Gabriel could go worse and worse as time progresses
2) why Gabriel's behaviour may be inconsistent (consistent behaviour doesn't combine well with sensory-overload magical madness and he is saner when untransformed)
3) why Butterfly Miraculous is so powerful (because this power is balanced with the great risk of using it)
At the same time, it is a trope known well enough to work well even in children's shows. In fact, I thought this idea may be canon, but then season 5 happened.
What do you think of this idea?
P. S. As always, thank you for your analysis, you are a treasure for the fandom!
Thank you for the lovely words! I'm flattered that you enjoy the blog so much!
I'm on the record as saying that evil Kwamis are about the only way to fix canon, so of course I love you idea! That post was about fixing canon post season five, though, so let's focus more on the butterfly itself.
Canon doesn't really explain how the heck the butterfly works. We get moments like this one from Sandboy:
Hawk Moth: I feel an emotion of great intensity. So pure… (turns a butterfly into an akuma) Fly away my little akuma and evilize him!
But why this happens is confusing. The butterfly isn't the miraculous of Emotion. That's the peacock. The butterfly is Transformation. Which is silly, so we're ignoring that. The butterfly is absolutely written to be Emotion in terms of almost everything about how it functions, so as far as I'm concerned, it's Emotion. Gabriel senses emotions with it and is even implied to have to pick what powers he gives based on the person's emotions as we see in Risk:
Shadow Moth: I need a villain who will force Ladybug to take risks, and without even realizing it, (corrupts a butterfly into a Megakuma) she'll make a mistake! (Shadow Moth closes his eyes to search for any strong negative emotions.) Extra 1: Great, of course my keys disappear from my bag just when I have to go out. Xavier: Now even benches have empty pigeon spikes on them? Oh, my poor friends... Froggy's Dad: Froggy, come back! It's too dangerous! Froggy: Why are you always scared of everything? I want to ride my bike without a helmet, without training wheels! Shadow Moth: (Open his eyes.) Perfect! Fly away, my Megakuma, and plague that deceived heart!
You could absolutely take this setup and use it to craft a narrative where Gabriel's actions are at least partially driven by the effects of feeling everyone else's emotions weighing down on him. This is extra true when you remember that Gabriel is supposed to be grief stricken. We are rarely at our best when we are mourning profound loss and the show really failed to lean into that fact even though the writers clearly wanted Gabriel to be sympathetic.
In my own rewrite, I heavily rely on these elements to shape Gabriel and Nathalie's characters. She may not use the butterfly, but she's also supposed to be mourning Emilie (or, at least, she is as of season five. I'm pretty sure that's a retcon, but it's something I changed to make her character work, so I'm cool with it.) That is a much stronger basis for Nathalie supporting Gabriel than the tired old trope of women doing stupid things because of men. (Don't get me wrong, we do, I just find it boring in most situations. It would only work in canon if the love square was supposed to be positive romantic love and Nathalie was supposed to be toxic romantic love, but the love square is toxic as hell and even "ends the world" so bleh )
I will peel back the curtain a little bit and give you one of my favorite ideas for making something like this work: if you have Emilie in a coma and not dead, then her brain would still be active. She'd still be experiencing emotions. Doesn't it make perfect sense for Gabriel to stay transformed 24/7 so that he can sense what is left of his wife, assuring himself that she's still there? And if the magic needs to stay secret, then of course that would mean that he never comes out of his home office because that's the only safe place to transform. And if you add in Gabriel being weak to the emotions of others, well, I think that has potential for something interesting, don't you?
#alexunbroken#lore discussion#Gabriel deserves better#Sympathetic Gabe my darling tragic villain how I love you#Not enough to redeem you but the love is still there#I prefer him as a tragedy and contrast to Adrien#Healthy grief and love vs unhealthy grief and love#Not that canon gave us that but a girl can dream
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Bad Santa (2) – Two brothers
Summary: You’re an evildoer. This year, Santa is going to punish you. His evil twin brother has other plans.
Pairing: Santa!Ari Levinson x Naughty Lister!Reader x JackFrost!Steve Rogers
Warnings: naughty lister reader, mentions of being naughty/evil, implied attended cheating, punishment, kinda kidnapping, strict Ari, mentions of ice play/mild ice play (barely)
A/N: For my story, Jack Frost is Santa’s twin brother.
Bad Santa Masterlist
Catch up here: Bad Santa (1) – Level 6 Naughty Lister
“You’ll sit in that corner, thinking about all the sins you committed to reach the top of my list. When I come back, we will talk about a few rules,” Santa (Ari) growls at you.
You’re rather unimpressed by his demands. Crossing your arms over your chest, you push your tits up. Santa’s (Ari) eyes drop to your cleavage for a second. It happened so fast you’re not sure if he did look at your tits.
“I won’t tell you again, Naughty Lister!” He yells now. His voice booms through the room, making it shake. You only giggle.
Men yelled at you before. Mostly after you demanded more than their dick.
“Aw, that’s cute,” you snicker. “Do you honestly believe I buy this whole Santa shit? I bet that uptight bitch hired you to keep me away from her husband’s dick.” You snort at his angry expression. “Now, let me go. I lost interest in his dick. I get bored easily if I must put so much effort into getting dick.”
“Y/N Y/L/N!” He growls and grabs your upper arms. Santa (Ari) shakes you, only to earn another giggle.
“Do it harder, Santa,” you purr and lick your lips. “You know, this Santa outfit slowly gets me wet. If you put me over your lap, I’m all yours. Maybe you even got a nice thick rod for me.”
“What is wrong with you? Can you not think about dick for a moment? I am Santa Claus, St. Nicholas, the one and only, not some random man you can seduce! No one will fall for your trap here!”
“No one.” You smirk when his brother sneaks into the room. Jack Frost slash Steve looks a little more laid-back. “What a pity.” You fake a deep sigh. “I love me some good dick. Especially when it comes with a handsome face.”
“I—” Santa (Ari) groans and pushes you away from him. He starts pacing the room while thinking about a way to bring you back on the nice list. A naughty lister like you cannot defeat his faith in people or his festive mood.
“Allow me, brother,” Jack (Steve) says as his eyes roam your body hungrily. He’s bored most of the year. Santa rarely brings naughty listers here. He still prefers to punish the kids by not bringing them gifts. You, on the other hand, are a naughty woman ready to ride his aching cock. “You know, I’m a master at taming brats and naughty listers.”
Santa (Ari) clears his throat. You cannot know his brother can barely keep his needs under control. “No,” he simply says. “This one is on top of the naughty list. I don’t think you’ll be able to handle her.”
“I think he’ll handle me very well.” You nod at yourself as your eyes drift toward Jack Frost (Steve), Santa’s naughty brother. From the moment you met him, you knew he was a naughty one. “Those big hands are perfect for spanking my ass if I refuse to listen to him.”
Jack (Steve) can’t wait to get you alone. He only needs to trick his brother, the man who always knows what people think. “Brother, I’ve got this. Let me handle her.”
“I said no!” Santa (Ari) yells again. The walls shake, and you wonder if your boss’s wife paid extra for the special effects.
You smirk. If she keeps you away from her husband’s dick, you’ll take two for the price of one.
“How about you both try to handle me? Oh, Santa Baby,” you purr Santa’s name, “I’ll be an awful good girl if you give me that grand-prime dick you’re hiding in your pants.”
“Jack (Steve)!” Santa says, “Get her out of here before I lose control and throw her into the deepest and darkest hole I can find. I’m done with naughty listers for today.” At that, Santa (Ari) storms out of the room, leaving you to his brother.
“Damn, he’s a very good actor,” you hum to yourself. “I wonder how much that bitch paid you two. Did I see you somewhere else? Do you do commercials and stuff?” You wonder aloud while Jack (Steve) watches you with amusement. “What?”
“Doll, you still didn’t get that this is real, huh? My brother is Santa Claus, and I’m Jack Frost. We’re not fantasy figures! You’re not in Kansas anymore, that’s for sure. My brother won’t let you leave the North Pole as long as you act like a cat in heat yearning for dick.”
You wrinkle your forehead. Can this be real, or did you hit your head?
No, Santa Claus cannot be real. You didn’t believe in him since you were a kid. He let you down more than once.
“You’re slowly starting to believe us,” Jack (Steve) muses. “Why the sad face all of a sudden?” He searches your face. Unlike his brother, Jack cannot read your mind, or rather what’s in your heart.
Shaking your head, you try to push the disappointment and hurting away. Every Christmas, you have been waiting patiently for Santa to bring you a gift. The one you’ve been praying for all year.
It didn’t matter that you had been an awful good girl. He never came.
“She’s in the room for naughty listers now. I don’t know what happened, but she suddenly got sad and refused to talk to me,” Jack (Steve) tells his brother about the latest development.
“Why?” Santa (Ari) asks.
“Why what?” Jack (Steve) replies.
“Why did she get sad all of a sudden?” Searching his brother’s face, Santa (Ari) frowns. “Jack (Steve), what did you do? I want you to tell me exactly what you said to her.”
“I told her that this wasn’t a trick or a show. She had to understand that you’re Santa Claus, the real one. I told her that you won’t let her leave the North Pole if she doesn’t regret her sins.”
“Did she believe you?” Santa (Ari) asks. He watches his brother, furrowing his brows. “No lies, Jack (Steve). You know that I know if you are lying to me.”
“Brother,” Jack (Steve) sighs, “I don’t know if she believed me. I had the feeling she remembered something from her past and got sad. You’re the expert when it comes to reading minds and feelings. Do not ask me to do your job! Maybe you fucked shit up in the past!”
Jack (Steve) storms out of the room. He’s just done having the role of the bad guy all the damn time.
“What will you do if I’m a bad girl?” Back to your usual cocky self, you watch Jack (Steve) return. “Spank me? Bite me? Lick me?”
“I’ll freeze you,” he replies and taps your nose. You shudder because the tip of his finger turned blue. It’s ice-cold, but you don’t mind. “Any part of you.”
“How about you put that ice-cold finger to better use?” You lick your lips. “Did you ever use it for ice play?” You chuckle at his shocked expression. “Aw, don’t tell me Santa’s brother never got his finger inside a warm and wet pussy.”
Grabbing his hand, you guide it between your legs, pressing his cold finger against your panties. “You better not let Santa know.” His hand turns cold, and you whimper. The new sensation already has you on the edge.
“Say, are you like Elsa and can create a castle out of ice and a nice dress?” you purr and roll your hips. “Do you love to sing Let It Go, too?”
Part 3
Tags in reblog.
#ari levinson#steve rogers#santa au#Bad Santa (2) – Two brothers#steve rogers x reader#ari levinson x reader#ari levinson x you#steve rogers x you#x reader
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Hello!! Delta here!! Coming back from a long break!! :D
^ A lil about my blog:
PLEASE DON'T CALL ME AN ARTISTS!! MAKES ME UNCOMFY!! :( Call me someone that draw or anything else, be creative and have fun about it XD
This blog might contain some unappropiate stuff (swears, slurs [the ones I can say], sex jokes, and so on) but nothing nsfw!!
This is mostly an art blog! I do drawing requests A LOT!! They're open most of the time, but it's always kind to ask first!!
ASKS ARE OPEN most of the time! Say whatever you want idc! If you make me uncomfy I'll tell you or just block you! I'm always open to chat! :)
I get tired often T_T So some days I might not be as active as others, so please don't insist too much about it :(
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