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clean-bands-dirty-stories · 4 years ago

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Breathe ~ Doctor (part 1)

A/n: So I had a FANTASTIC idea and had to write it. The first part is all of the experience with 9 in one part. I so hope you enjoy this introduction, and allow it to take you on a journey with me that I have been having far too much fun exploring.

Word Count: 11,000+

MASTERLIST

Rose Tyler had three people in her life that were a constant.

Her mother, first of all. The woman might be a little annoying from time to time, gossiping and being pushy and demanding and wasting money on parties and dramatics. She was a good woman though, with a large heart. She had, after all, raised Rose by herself and the girl had come out brilliantly.

Then there was Mickey. Mickey was Rose's boyfriend. He was... cool, I guess. There was definitely more to him than others cared to dig for. Even he himself didn't know his full potential, and it put a stopper on him quite a bit. He was fine enough, and obviously cared for Rose, but he tended to be a bit... distracted, and oblivious. Desperate, maybe.

Y/n sure didn't approve of him, but as Rose's best friend he had long since learned to accept the man. Y/n was very good at filling in the spaces where Mickey lacked. He was attentive and listened to Rose talk for hours. That was perhaps the biggest reason he didn't like Mickey too much. Rose complained a lot. Y/n fancied himself an artist. He and Rose had met when he'd tried to do street art to get some attention, but it was more hussle than it was worth. The best thing that came out of it was his friendship with Rose.

There was something odd about Y/n, Rose was sure. The man was usually very open and honest - unless it came to any and all talk about relationships. Rose had long since stopped asking, but others hadn't. Every time his love life was brought up, he clammed shut and got very bitey. No one was sure why, but it happened every time without fail. His reaction didn't get any more or less violent, either. No one could wear him out or get him to snap. He just got tense and irritable until you stopped talking, and then the mood was usually ruined the rest of the day.

It was a silver lining, though. Otherwise Y/n was extremely pleasant and had no problems talking about other peoples' relationships or love lives. Y/n never encouraged Rose to be single or to dump Mickey - as long as everyone was happy, you could talk about anything in your life without any back lash. Rose got along and they didn't talk about it and that was that.

Then the Doctor happened.

Rose and Y/n didn't lie to each other. They'd formed a friendship on if you didn't want something known, you didn't mention it until you were ready to talk about it with a level head. No matter what, they didn't lie. They just kept their mouths shut. So when the Doctor entered Rose Tyler's life and her mom took up the phones like usual and Mickey ran off to the bar to watch the game, Rose pulled Y/n into her room and told him everything.

"No," Y/n mumbled. It wasn't that he didn't believe her. Rose Tyler wasn't insane, and they didn't lie to each other. He knew that, logically, if she said it, it was true. That didn't stop the fact that his mind rejected what she was telling him.

"Yes!" Rose gushed, nodding eagerly. "He's got this weird screw driver, except it's got no head, just a little light at the end. And mannequins - they moved. He's the one that blew up my job."

Y/n allowed him a second to process that before responding. Rose stayed silent as well, waiting for him to speak again before she said more. "And he said his name was what?"

"The Doctor. Sounds like a mad man, huh?"

A sort of amused snort came from Y/n then. "No shit." He shook his head. "Hold on, I need air." They began to walk out when the doggy door suddenly blew in. Y/n and Rose both jumped, before Rose yelled something at her mom about not nailing the flap shut like she said she would. But when Y/n kneeled down, he picked up nails off of the ground, holding them up for Rose to see. "I think she actually did, Rosey."

The two locked eyes and then both gazes shot to the flap as it suddenly moved again. Rose went to stick her head down there but Y/n wasn't having any of that. He nudged her with his foot, grabbing the bat by the door he had insisted the Tyler's kept at the ready. Two women living alone needed some way to protect themselves. Not necessarily a man - no woman NEEDED a man, even Y/n knew that - but something. Now it came in handy as he hefted, swinging the door open as Rose scrambled to her feet behind him.

A man stood there. He wore a leather jacket and had an odd expression on his face. "Hello," Y/n greeted, unsure.

"Hello," the man responded back. He lifted a long, odd object and pressed a button, running the object down Y/n's body as if... scanning him.

It clicked in Y/n's brain far too quickly. The thing glowed at the end that was pointed at Y/n, and it made a buzzing noise. The man was weird and smiled too wide. Even the leather jacket was there. "You're the Doctor."

The Doctor's smile grew. "Normally I have to introduce myself. It's usually a bad sign when someone knows my name, but you're not made of plastic so I can't imagine what I'd have to be worried about. Are you made of plastic by chance?"

"No," Y/n answered calmly. He was processing Rose's story at hyper speed now. It only made sense that a man like this would be attached to a world where plastic came alive and tried to kill you. The night seemed bright around him. There was something odd about his presence, like seeing cartoon and live action mixing between characters and background. The Doctor didn't belong here, and it was obvious in every move he made.

The Doctor nodded. "Suppose I'll be on my way then."

"You will not," Rose spoke up, grabbing the man's arm around Y/n and pulling all of them. "I have questions and this time you WILL answer them."

That simple action changed the lives of Rose Tyler, the Doctor, and everyone they cared about so much that none of them would ever be able to go back. Honestly though, none of them would have it any other way. Except maybe Jackie.

"Doctor?" Y/n turned to the other man, who hummed without looking over. The Doctor's eyes were trained on the end of the world. As were Rose's. Y/n couldn't keep looking. Something had stuck in his head. Something that made him even more sick than the sight of an empty planet being consumed in a universe that had long since been done with it. "The woman before. She said something about your planet. Something about you being impossible."

The Doctor got a very dark look on his face then. "I suppose I am rather impossible." He shrugged, obviously trying to keep it light.

Unfortunately, Y/n's curiosity was insatiable. It was something the Doctor had come to appreciate about him. Until now, maybe. "Well, I'm the last of my kind." He paused but when Y/n's expression grew only more earnest, he shared more. There was something about Y/n that pulled at the Time Lord. Made him want to talk. Talk about things other than just science and time and language and culture and history and such. Something that made the Doctor want to talk about himself. "A very long time ago, there was a war. A war between my people, and those knows as the Daleks." He paused, getting rather somber. "We won...” he swallowed. There was an unspoken, at a cost.

Y/n found himself with more questions, but felt none of them appropriate to ask. "I'm so sorry." Rose turned then to see Y/n take the Doctor's hand. Y/n had always been affectionate, but only with people he was rather attached to. With strangers, Y/n was usually quiet and reserved. Until he was sure someone could handle his prying questions and blunt honesty that so often got him in trouble if he didn't check himself around the right people.

Perhaps it was the fact that the Doctor was a lot like that as well that Y/n had taken to him so quickly. Whether it was that or something else, Rose was glad the two men were getting along. She was also glad there was someone smarter than Y/n in the room. The boy had asked so many questions and gotten so many answers that he had quite a bit of knowledge more than normal people. He was no genius like the Doctor, nor was he hyper intelligent or anything. But he could outmatch Rose and Mickey, and they often went to him when they needed something spelled or math done that they couldn't mentally do quick enough.

Rose suddenly saw something else though. Past the similarity and the comfort and the peace the men found in each other. The Doctor looked back to Earth, and Y/n continued to look at the Doctor. It was subtle, and it wouldn't have been noticed if Rose wasn't already looking. But she had. Y/n finally looked away fully, but there was a look in his eyes that Rose had never seen before.

What was that about?

"What was that?" Rose demanded when the left the room, parting from the Doctor.

Y/n seemed taken aback. "What was what?"

Rose wasn't sure how to describe it. An odd look? A weird new air about him? There was something different when Y/n looked at the Doctor and Rose couldn't understand it. "With you and the Doctor?" She tried to clarify.

That only seemed to confuse Y/n more. "What are you talking about? Holding hands? I do that with you and Mickey all the time, and I'm not even Mickey's biggest fan."

Rose rolled her eyes so hard that Y/n almost laughed. "You looked... different."

Y/n was quiet a long time. Rose almost thought he wasn't going to say anything. That she had found something he wasn't ready to share. But then he did speak, even if it was soft. "He's different, the Doctor. Not just because he's alien, though... perhaps that is it." He sighed. "He's lonely. He's so lonely, Rose. Can't you see it? In the way he empathizes with loss and grief. The way he looks when you mention his name or his planet or the TARDIS or your family. When he was watching you watching Earth die, like he could see... something else. He told me something. Something that makes me think... he might have watched his own world be destroyed, like we did today. But it wasn't empty, and his species hadn't spread out and integrated and evolved. They just died, and left him all alone."

For a second, it was quiet. "You see it, don't you?"

A nod was all Y/n gave at first. He didn't need to say anything, but he did anyway. "He looked the way I did when I got the news back then. When I found out. He gets that exact look."

Suddenly Rose looked very sad indeed. "Well. Now you both have someone, eh?"

A small smile tugged at Y/n's lips. "Yeah, here's to that at least."

"Y/N!"

The man turned at his name, only to be tackled by the shorter blonde that had become known as his best friend. "Rose," Y/n whispered, clinging to her. "God I thought you were dead for sure. I - what happened? I lost you guys and then..." He looked sick. "There was so much light and-"

"We're all okay," the Doctor reassured. "That's what matters."

Y/n turned on the older man. "Now you listen here. That's NOT all that matters. Because she damn well could have not been and I wasn't there to protect her. Or you! What would I have done if either of you had died and I was up here sitting on my thumbs like an idiot?"

The Doctor was taken aback by Y/n's outburst. When the man turned and stormed off, Rose was the one to step up and explain. "I'm sorry, Doctor. He's rather protective of those he cares about." She bit her lip, giving the Doctor the impression there was more she wanted to say. He waited for her to speak, and after a while she did. "When he was young, Y/n saw something terrible. His childhood wasn't normal. I mean, you think life is pretty rough on most of us, but Y/n's had it worst than most."

"What happened?" The Doctor asked quietly.

Rose sighed. "His parents had always been pretty distant, but they were mostly good. They did what they needed to do and let him free when he wanted to be. But, well, they were.. angry. The fought a lot, and it didn't help that his dad was a fan of alcohol. His mum... well she was a fan of lots of things other than that, none of them good for you. One day, she came home high. She wanted something... I can't remember what. His parents fought over it until... his mum pulled a little too hard. His dad slipped and knocked his head really hard on the floor. He died. His mom panicked and..." Rose swallowed. And no further words had to be said about it. "Y/n was on the couch the entire time watching. He ran. Was on the streets for a long time doing lots of things. Working as best he could while keeping his head down until he turned eighteen and was free of the system. Found us right after that. He watched his parents destroy themselves and spent a long time alone after that because he couldn't stop the fighting." She scoffed. "His words of course. Not his fault people fight. He was only twelve."

The Doctor seemed to be thinking about something. Something that didn't seem to be sitting right with him. "Does he have any other family?"

"Loads. He used to have a very big family. No brothers or sisters, but lots of aunts and uncles and cousins and the such."

"What happened to them?" The Doctor looked at Rose, as if searching her mind for something he desperately needed.

Rose stalled a few seconds. "A lot of the same, really. Not so much murder, but... well, his parents got their habits from their families, and between that and regular life? Not as many are as strong or as resourceful as Y/n. They ran off or got addicted to something or..." She shrugged. "He lost all of them at some point."

The Doctor nodded. "I see. Well, this is settled. Let's go somewhere more fun." His tone changed but the mood didn't. Rose let it drop though. Y/n didn't mind Rose answering questions like this for people he was comfortable with. He actually preferred it, so that wasn't her worry. The Doctor had drawn a silent line though. She didn't know what it was blocking her from, but she decided to let the whole topic drop just in case.

Perhaps it was what Y/n had said about him and the Doctor being the same.

She hoped they weren't too similar. It was bad enough knowing Y/n's story, she couldn't bare another like it.

Y/n had been staring at the building that had just gone up in flames for a very long time now. Rose and the Doctor had been celebrating, but Y/n sat there quietly, on the pavement, staring at the building like he was waiting for it to undo the carnage that had been caused moments ago.

"So what's on your mind?" The Doctor had plopped down next to Y/n, smile small. He'd gotten used to Y/n's mellow mood. The boy wasn't hyper like the Doctor. He didn't get off on exploration. What drove Y/n, it seemed, was saving people. And a life like this took its tole on people who wanted to save everyone. People like Y/n. So, the Doctor had learned to check in every once in a while. Every time he did, he was never disappointed. Even when Y/n seemed to be hurting, he was never negative about it. He could accept a success. The things he did think though put the Doctor on a path that had him mulling for days. In a good way. He and Y/n got into a lot of very stimulating debates this exact way.

Today wasn't about debates for Y/n.

"I know they were going to destroy the world and stuff. I'm not sad they're dead. We won and they've been stopped and all of humanity and Earth has been saved. That's great. The way we did it was rather impressive too." He chuckled, but there was obviously more he was thinking.

"But?" The Doctor prompted.

Y/n shrugged. "Wiping out an entire family. I mean, their species isn't normally like that, are they?"

"No," The Doctor answered slowly.

A bitter sweet smile rested on Y/n's lips then. "Do you think they were raised to be like that, or is blood thirst genetic?" It was a sarcastic question, so the Doctor didn't answer. There was a moment of quiet before Y/n shook his head and sighed. "Doctor, would you prefer I didn't travel with you?"

That was not the thing the Doctor had been expecting Y/n to say next. "Why would you ever think I didn't want you along with us?"

Another moment where Y/n struggled with how to form his thoughts and feelings into words passed before the boy finally figured it out. "I like this life. I really do. I like being around you and Rose and watching you guys have your fun. But sometimes I feel like... a bit of a downer."

The Doctor chuckled. "Honestly Y/n, you're the first person in a very long who sees the truth to things. As much as we cling to our victories, you're real about them. You handle everything with complete understanding, even with your limited knowledge. You have empathy even for beings who would have killed you without even remembering your face. You have pity for monsters and you feel for species the rest of your kind would rather kill than have a civil conversation with. Rose is fun and she matches my energy and I appreciate that. But you ask the questions I've been waiting for someone to ask for centuries. Your kindness is quite refreshing. You get it."

Y/n smiled. "So you want me along?"

"I will always want you along, Y/n. As long as I can have you along," The Doctor answered without hesitation. "You're no downer, I promise."

It was that moment that something changed for Y/n. Rose saw this too, but not in the moment the two men shared now, but after. Y/n and the Doctor had unlocked something in each other in that conversation. A kind of connection where even as everyone cheered, all the pair had to do was look at each other to know that in all the sweetness around them, the other understood the slight bitterness they felt as well. As much as they wanted to end evil, they also both felt the loss of any soul they couldn't save. Taking a moment to mourn with each other seemed a relief for both of them.

It was something Rose couldn't feel. She saw things pretty straight forward. Bad people needed to have an end to them. And she wasn't wrong, but the compassion that had come to Y/n and Doctor after having their families and lives taken from them and living far too long by themselves, they had a unique ability to give a moment of silence even for enemies who were twisted by things out of their control. Who couldn't be shown the light.

They bonded over it so much that Rose felt herself being left behind.

Y/n and Rose still told each other lots and cuddled when either needed comfort. The Doctor and Rose still had lots of fun and laughed at each others jokes and had that same sense of humor that came only from adjusting to and enjoying the life they both lead. They were all friends. But Y/n and the Doctor had something else. Just a little something more. Just enough that Rose saw the change and began to think that there might be something major she didn't know about the man who called himself her best friend.

"Something's off."

Rose and the Doctor looked over at Y/n, whose eyes were slowly and carefully scanning their surroundings with narrowed eyes, as if searching for proof that his hunch was solid. "What is it?" Rose asked gently, moving closer so they didn't have to talk around the people in the crowd they had been moving through before Y/n had stopped dead.

The dynamic between the trio had very early on become clear. The Doctor was the brain, coming up with the plans. Rose was the second in command. She was stuck to the Doctor's side and they worked in tandem, being unbroken and often sliding along the same wave length. Y/n was the heart. When Rose and the Doctor got stuck on a mind path, or got distracted, or veered a little too right of what was right, Y/n was the one to shake things up to give them a new perspective, or to help either of them if they needed it. Y/n was a comfort and a friend. He was also very intuitive. Where the Doctor sought things out, and Rose seemed to stumble on information she found, information seemed to find Y/n. He just had a good gut guiding him.

So when he said something was up, at this point, he was never questioned by his companions.

"Earlier one of the girls said that people are chosen to go up to the higher floors. That there's a prize. They go up and something happens and then they never come back."

The Doctor nodded. "I was thinking about that too."

Y/n shook his head. "Did you notice that it's incredibly hot in here? I mean, why? It's obviously not ideal - it makes the people here uncomfortable. It's slight discomfort, but still. Why keep a bunch of people in a super heated room? What's on level 500, air conditioning?"

It was made to be a joke, but the comment seemed to spark something in the Doctor. "You know what, that's an excellent point." He stood straighter. "Fun's over. Where's that friend of yours, Rose?"

The blonde looked around. "He was... just behind us."

"Grand," Y/n grumbled sarcastically.

The Doctor chuckled a few times. "Took the words right out of my mouth." As he said it he looked over at Y/n, his eyes flickering to Y/n's lips. He looked away quickly and Y/n missed the moment altogether. The two continued cracking jokes toward Rose about the man both of them had been increasingly annoyed with, but Rose wasn't responding.

Because she had seen where the Doctor's eyes had landed, and her mind was working a million miles an hour to put this together. It's not that the concept of men liking men was foreign to her, just rare. One that wasn't her first thought for sure. But as Y/n and the Doctor got closer and closer on a very emotionally intimate level, Rose was noticing the building tiny moments that wouldn't mean anything alone but meant everything put together.

She smiled to herself. Rose Tyler had a plan, and not just about Satellite Five.

"You wanna talk?" Y/n offered quietly.

"Do you?" Rose shot back.

Y/n wasn't sure what to do with that. "I always want to talk with you, Rose."

The blonde jerked her body to turn and face Y/n, a determined look on her face. "You know Y/n, how about this. An exchange of honesties. For every truth you tell me, I will tell you one in return. And your truth has to equal mine, so if you want something meaningful then you have to give something like that first."

Y/n paused and then nodded. "Sounds good. Do you want me to start?”

"No, actually," Rose decided. Y/n motioned for her to go ahead, so she did. "Watching my dad die was not great, but I'm glad he wasn't alone after all. It was kind of... a relief, actually. Some closure. I got to say goodbye. I got to hold his hand." She offered a weak smile. "Now your turn."

Unsure of what Rose was aiming for, Y/n thought for a second for something he hadn't told her recently that could be as profound and unexpected as that. "This whole life of ours gives me purpose. I feel like I matter, which is something I haven't really felt until now. I know I had people who cared about me and worried about me and expected me home every night, but I always craved to make a difference and finally having that has been like a dream come true. Even though I get a little melancholic... all the time, it's just because I get stuck in my own head a lot and think too much. I actually really like what we do."

Rose nodded. Even though it had been a tad mild compared to hers, it was less what he had said and more the fact that he'd said it. Y/n struggled to communicate positive emotions, often overthinking the negative ones and voicing those because he needed second opinions and insight. Acknowledging positive things didn’t require a second opinion or input, just a congratulations, and since when did he get that just for traveling with the Doctor and finding purpose without looking like some sort of arrogant dick? It might not have been as profound as Rose's truth, but it was equally meaningful.

"I love Mickey and my mum of course, but I don't think I'll be ever to leave this life and be okay with it. I think that I might end up breaking up with Mickey because he deserves better and that thought terrifies me."

Y/n pursed his lips. "Can I just-"

"No comforting or additional thought. We can discuss later. Right now, truth. State it."

"Okay," Y/n sighed. "Uh, relationships in general terrify me." It sort of slipped out and both of them hesitated. Y/n never talked about this sort of stuff. It was the only thing he never talked about, even with Rose. She expected him to clam up but after a second, he just kept going. "I'm scared of falling in love and having my heart broken. I know some things are worth it, and people glorify love so much and I crave it, I really do, but... I've lost so much. I don't think I'd be able to handle it if I really fell for someone and then had to lose them. I'd rather make friends and family than that nonsense. It would hurt to lose them, but in a different way, and there would still be the thought that you would always be that person's friend or family if you get separated or part ways or whatever. Like we'll always be each other's friend, I think. Even if we got to a point where we couldn't be friends anymore. If I left this life behind, or one of us died or-" He sighed. "But when you break up with someone, they move on. They date other people, and do intimate things with them. They love and connect in just as intimate ways as you used to, and eventually they forget you and replace you. I couldn't handle that. I won't."

Rose let out the breath she'd been holding. She'd been too scared to breath, in case it shattered the moment she'd been waiting to happen for years now. "I understand." She took his hand. "Have you... ever been in love before?"

Y/n shook his head. "Not yet." He paused and Rose felt the weight of those words. Not yet. She could imagine Y/n clinging to his heart as the Doctor got closer and closer, his smile ever wide and his charm ever sparkling.

Rose's shoulders sagged a bit. "What will you do if it ever happens?"

"Ignore it." The words were too quick and solid. They came across as desperate. Insistent. In that moment one thing was clearer than anything else in the world. If Y/n wasn't in love with the Doctor already, he would be soon. He was falling hard, and he was falling fast, and when he landed it was going to hurt. They were suddenly both terrified about it.

"DON'T TOUCH ME!" The words were hysterical. Y/n's hands shook and his eyes were wide and his skin shone with sweat. His hair was messier than usual and his clothes were disheveled, like he'd rolled down a long hill or gotten in a fight or something.

The horror of what was happening in that moment settled over Rose and the Doctor in a truly terrible way. It was in the ringing in their ears and the horrible, bitter taste that was suddenly in their mouths. "Y/n-" the Doctor began.

"No," the man answered in a very final tone. One that let them know there was no room for question or doubt. He had been touched by the child. He had been infected, and he refused to infect any of the others.

A new friend, Jack Harkness, jogged over at the commotion. "What's happening over here?"

"Doesn't matter," Y/n answered solidly. "We need to move on."

Rose let out a sound that neared a choked sob, except she wasn't crying. She just looked to be in pain. "You- you can't! Y/n-"

Y/n took a few deep breaths. He had made the mistake. In his idiocy, he had gotten between the kid and Rose, and now he was here. The child was far back and they'd had time to get away, but Y/n had touched him and that meant only one thing. "Rose, we don't have time for this." He was near breaking down, and he begged her to see that. He couldn't spend the time before he died losing it. He had to help as much as he could. He had to make a difference. He had to-

"You know, you don't have to do anything, Y/n." Y/n and the Doctor looked at each other. His lips were parted and his eyes were desperate. He wanted to help but... he didn't know how. "You can stop. We would understand. You - you probably don't have much time left." His face crumbled, like he finally understood the meaning behind what he was saying. "You don't have to come. Spend it doing something else. Get yourself some food maybe. There's bound to be something in the TARDIS. Pick a bed, and stay there. We'll keep you comfortable after... after this."

A soft chuckle came from Y/n then. "You know, I'm going to die." The group got deathly quiet. "Maybe that's not true. I'll be alive. I'll be something worse than dead. I'll be brain dead. Forever." He shook his head, his breathing becoming shallow. "But right now, I'm still me. And I want to do something before I stop being me, Doctor. I want to do all I can. I want to do everything, but all we have time for is making sure whatever is happening to me never happens to anyone else ever again, okay? Can I spend my last moment with you?" He was looking right at the Doctor. Not at Rose, which would have made sense as they were practically siblings with the way they acted toward each other. Not even Jack, who had been having fun flirting with everyone - especially because Y/n wasn't anywhere near as hard to get as Rose or the Doctor. Y/n looked at the Doctor, and begged to die by his side, and Jack and Rose looked at each other because the need that Y/n had to steal all the time he had left to spend with the Doctor of all people... it said something Y/n was not ready to find the actual words for.

"Of course you can," the Doctor whispered.

And he did. Y/n was there as they reached the not-bomb that was actually some sort of alien ambulance. He was there when they saved Nancy and gathered the troops. And when it came time, he left too.

"Nancy, take Rose to where you cut the gate. And take this!" He tossed his sonic screwdriver at Rose and she caught it.

"I ought to go as well," Y/n spoke up.

The Doctor looked confused by that. "No I need you here. I promised you'd-"

"Doctor," Y/n interrupted. He took a shaky breath. "I can feel it coming. Soon I'm going to be one of them. Mindless, and coming after you, and you won't be able to stop me. I will kill all of you. Make you just like them." His face darkened. "Like us." He shook his head and Rose and the Doctor looked at each other, trying to find the answer in each other that neither of them had. Y/n steeled himself. "So this is goodbye."

The Doctor stood there for a few seconds. Too many seconds. He was trying to say something, but didn't seem to be able to. "Y/n?" The man answered to his name, and the men locked eyes. "Do you remember the first time we ever set out, and you told me... you told me that Rose was the most important person to you? You joked that no one would ever be that important to you, except someone who would be... special." He let air out of his nose. "You were special to me. More special than most people."

Y/n smiled, fighting tears. "You are special to me too, Doctor." He looked away. "I'm sorry our journey ended so early. I think... I think it could have been special, too."

Then there was nothing else to say, so he left with Rose and Nancy, the three of them booking it to the fence. Y/n stepped through and watched as Nancy and Rose fixed the metal so he wouldn't be able to get back in.

"Did you mean it?" Rose asked, looking at her best friend for what could very well be the last time. "That I was important to you? And that the Doctor was special enough to be just as important?"

The silence stretched for too long. Rose wasn't sure if it was painful to talk with that thing pushing its way up Y/n's throat, or if it was his human fear that kept his lips sealed, but Y/n didn't say anything for a very long time. The fence was sealed and the women stood before he finally spoke. "Do you think differently of me?" He rushed to add, "I know it's obvious. I saw the way you look between us like you expect us to lose our minds and make out right there. I see the way you and Jack looked at each other before too. Like you were watching a romance movie that had a sad ending. One you didn't expect, or think fair. I'm not as subtle as I like to think I am."

Rose scoffed. "You think I think differently of you because you're in love with the Doctor? Why? Because he's an alien?" She narrowed her eyes. "Or because he's a man?" Y/n looked away. "Y/n, you're my best friend. After all we've been through with the Doctor, you're practically my brother. I have been waiting ages now for you to admit your feelings for him. I didn't know until we started traveling, but it doesn't change the fact that you're there for me more than anyone else. You protect me and care about me. Your heart is bigger than all of the universes put together, and you bleed gold - I swear to god. You and the Doctor... you give him something I don't think anyone ever could. You understand something I can't wrap my head around. The way you mourn even the worst of us, because you see potential. The way you can do that, but still stop evil and remove yourself from harm because as much as you pity people who destroy themselves and others, you also won't tolerate their destruction. You're one of the most amazing men I've ever met, and don't think I'm just saying that because you were my first boyfriend.” It was a reference to When they’d first met; Y/n had pretended to be Rise’s boyfriend to get a creep to go away.

Both of them laughed at that, tears falling down their faces. "I remember that." Y/n slipped his hands in his pockets and the mood dropped again. "In another world, Rose, I wouldn't have ever left your side. I really do love you. And even if I am feeling... things, for the Doctor." His eyebrows came together. "You were always my first priority. I just know that he cares about you, too. He has your back, but someone needs to have his. Someone who really understands. And... you get distracted sometimes. But that's okay, because you always have my back, so we watch each other like that." His voice broke as he continued, "Had." Y/n and Rose locked eyes. "You watch him for me, alright? You two..." He laughed again. "I know you two are like me and him. I know he'll never admit it in a million years, but you two. It's subtle and quiet and innocent, but I can see it. I see it in the way he says your name, and the way you trust him. If you don't end up happy because of me I'll come back from the dead just to kick your asses."

Tears fell harder down Rose's face as she laughed again. "You're an idiot."

"Your idiot," Y/n replied without missing a beat.

Rose's expression fell. "How am I supposed to go on these journeys without you? Go back home and face my mum, who needs you around because you're the only one who'll listen to her gossip without giving her an ear load in return? Who will tell Mickey off now that I'm so different and we-" She choked on her words. "You can't go, Y/n."

"I don't want to..." His vision blurred and the pain that had been rising steadily came in full force now. Y/n leaned against the fence, bending at the middle a little bit as his other hand rose so his fingers could wrap around his throat. "I'm sorry, Rose. I- I-" He began sobbing, but stopped as it made the pain worse. "I'm- m-" He shook his head. He didn't want to hear himself say it... Then the thought occurred to him that the people might be trapped in their heads. Conscious and aware, but out of control. Would he see the face of every person he condemned to live like him? Would he sit there and see them and have to touch them anyway? Every single person until... until what? They didn't die. He wouldn't die. He would turn person after person until they were all brain dead and trapped just like him. "Rose."

"I'm here," she whispered, her voice haunted. "I'm right here, Y/n."

Y/n closed his eyes. "Run. Please - PLEASE don't see me like this. Don't see me- m- mummy-" The word forced itself out of his mouth and he whimpered, flinching upon hearing it. Rose made a sound that was half groan and half whine. This was hurting her. "Rose, Ru-" And then he looked up and locked eyes with the girl who had become his sister, and he thought of her and the Doctor before everything went black.

When he woke up again, he was somewhere new. He expected to see himself marching toward his friends, condemning them to death. He expected to see someone else about to be wrapped in his deadly clutches perhaps. But all he saw, instead, was a lot of lights and people and a blue beam with something large and cylinder in it. He saw his hands next. He reached them up to touch his face and they answered him. His face was skin. It was smooth and a little warm. There was no leather or metal. He wasn't wearing a gas mask.

"Y/N!" He turned in time to be rammed into by a smaller blonde. Her hair went into his face and he felt both panic and relief.

"You- you can't touch me. Rose what have you done?" He demanded rather harshly.

She shook her head, her body shaking as she sobbed. "You're cured, Y/n. You're all better. The Doctor - he figured it out. A brilliant man, he is. Truly brilliant."

Allowing himself a moment to process that, Y/n stayed quiet and just hugged Rose for a second. Once it did settle, though, he needed to know something. "Is the Doctor okay?"

"I'm perfectly fine." Rose and Y/n parted, turning their gazes to land on the Doctor himself. The man was grinning, his eyes light up with joy.

Y/n grinned back. "Guess you're not getting rid of me that easily, Doctor."

"Wouldn't have it any other way," the Doctor replied. He slipped his screwdriver in his pocket. "On we go, then. There's one more thing we have to do before we can celebrate." And just like that, Y/n was okay and not dead and they were all together. Things had been said that they were ignoring for now, because none of them could acknowledge them. Not yet. Right now, they had more important things.

At least that's how they reasoned it. Easier that way. Much, much easier.

"I'm sorry, we'd be sending you to your death?" Y/n demanded.

"Yes," the Slitheen responded.

The Doctor turned to face the man who looked about ready to blow a circuit. "Y/n, I know how you feel. Trust me, I do. We all do. But-"

"No buts!" Y/n argued. "She just wants to be free! Her whole family was killed and she had to run away or die with them. Can you imagine what it would be like to have to run, knowing everyone you care about would be gone? Being helpless to save them, because you messed with the wrong planet? Because you do what you always did. What you were TAUGHT to do?"

That seemed to hit a chord with the Doctor. "It doesn't matter, Y/n. It doesn't!" The Doctor shot again when Y/n went to argue. "She would have killed everyone here without a second thought. What are we supposed to do? She almost destroyed this entire planet for a bit of money, and then AGAIN just to get off of it and go somewhere else. Every single life on Earth, GONE, because she wanted a lift somewhere else."

Y/n looked away. "I can't do this one with you, then. I- I know it's necessary. I know you have to do it. I can't sit by and let you though, so I'm going to leave." He turned on Margaret then. "If you hurt him, I will destroy you, do you understand me? These people are MY family, and if you hurt them I will hunt you down and I tie you up and stick a needle in you and I will pump your body full of vinegar - do I make myself clear?"

Margaret looked scared... and a little impressed. "Yes sir." She looked to the Doctor as Y/n walked away. "You found your soulmate, eh?"

The Doctor didn't answer as far as Y/n knew. It was a relief to know that even if the Doctor had responded, Y/n hadn't been there to hear it.

He did manage to stay away a very long time. He only came back when the Earth under his feet began to crack and the lights went crazy and the sky began to glow and everything began to shake. He couldn't stay at home when things were going to wrong. When Rose and the Doctor and Jack could be dying. So Y/n raced back to the TARDIS, reaching it just as everything began to calm down. He pushed open those doors, praying that it wasn't the calm before the storm and the world was about to end.

When he opened the doors, he saw something he wasn't expecting. Te Doctor stood, Rose and Jack on either side of him, an egg in his hand. "What's that?"

Grinning, the Doctor hefted the thing as Y/n entered the TARDIS, closing the doors behind him. "This is Margaret." When Y/n was rightfully confused, the Doctor explained. He recounted the nights' adventures up until Margaret had looked into the heart of the TARDIS and had reverted to what she was now. "She told me..." The Doctor looked at Y/n with a soft look in his eyes. "She told me to tell you thank you. Before she died."

Y/n smiled to himself. "Well, she's welcome." Then he turned away. "Now, let's get her home shall we?"

"You want us to face those things with guns? There are six of us."

"Actually," The Doctor piped up. "Rose, Y/n, can you help me strip these wires? The faster we do it the sooner I can get this done."

"Uh, sure," Rose agreed, heading over to where the Doctor was crouched.

"Four of us," the woman corrected herself. Y/n hadn't caught her name yet. He made a mental note to do so when they gunned down the Daleks together later. Because he had seen something in the Doctor when he asked for help. Something that made Y/n suspicious.

"Five actually." Everyone looked at Y/n in surprise. "If we're arguing our need for time, Rose can help here and I can help keep those things from getting here for as long as possible. Maybe-" He stopped himself. "Maybe I can take down enough to make them not a threat at all." It was a joke that fell short, but one that made everyone offer at least a small smile. The Doctor went to argue, and that's when Y/n got serious. "I can't stay up here and strip wires when people are dying, Doctor. I won't."

The Doctor seemed to have pain in his eyes. "I can't stop you, can I?" He was begging Y/n. Desperately pleading for him to stay there. To do as the Doctor wanted him to.

This time, Y/n wasn't going to though. His arm was still bleeding and his other leg had a limp from his game. Y/n had looked death in the face twice now and avoided it. He figured he was on borrowed time anyway. Even if that wasn't true, Jack had saved Y/n's life. He had been the one to find Y/n and pull him out of that game right before he died. If they were all going to die anyway - or, at least, most of them - he would be by Jack's side to repay that debt. "You can't."

Once again, the Doctor and Y/n exchanged a look they both believed would be the last they shared. Ever since Y/n had been turned into one of the empty people when they met Jack, the Doctor had been significantly more protective of Y/n. Y/n was a man though and had been staying firm when he made his mind up, no matter how much the Doctor tried.

"Not at all?" The Doctor tried again.

Y/n smiled. "You know, Doctor. I've been pretty obedient until recently. I didn't stray too far or wander off, because I chose to stay behind and let you know where Rose had gone and that she was okay. Or that she wasn't. I did what you wanted me to. And then I died, and I realized that there is more important thing to life than sitting back and letting you take control just because you know more than I do. This is my choice, and I'm making it."

After a second, the Doctor nodded and Y/n took off with Jack and the others, headed to face the Daleks with a bunch of guns.

Y/n did help some. He watched each and every person on the Station die, and he ended up pressed against a wall with Jack at his side and Daleks charging the pair without hesitation. He had lost. But he had helped, even if it wasn't nearly enough to make a difference.

"Go ahead and warn the Doctor they're coming," Jack ordered. He spoke again before Y/n could argue. "I'll hold them off. I know you don't want to, but the Doctor needs warning, and I... I don't want see you die. Not again."

Pain flared in Y/n's chest then. "You're a good man, Jack."

"Thanks, but we don't have time for one of your goodbye speeches." Jack scoffed at himself. "You know, I did always want one though."

Y/n laughed, tears in his eyes. Why did he always end up here? "How about I give you a kiss on the cheek and you can return it later? I can give you that goodbye speech another day, when we have time."

Jack paused, and then nodded. "I'd like that." So Y/n kissed him on the cheek and then ran when the Daleks turned the corner, feeling his heart drop when the tell tale sign of death hit Y/n's ears in the form of Jack's scream. They'd both known this was what was going to happen. Y/n would never get that kiss, and Jack would never get that speech, but it had been nice that they'd parted holding onto that impossibility. Y/n hoped it had been what Jack was thinking when he died.

Unfortunately, Y/n didn't have much time to lament about it. "Doctor!" He ran into the room, stopping in the doorway. Y/n knew about the delta wave, and he knew what was about to happen. He knew why the Doctor had wanted Y/n and Rose to stay. Y/n had gone though, and now he was going to die with the rest of them. He wouldn't have it any other way. First, he needed to say something though. "Doctor, last time I faced death, I said something that we never talked about again. But we've had even more time together now and after all the regret I had last time, I- I can't die again without telling you-"

"I know," the Doctor said, interrupting. "I hate death confessions. I always have. It's not fair, you know. Telling me something like that and then running off and dying before I can do anything about it."

Even now, the Doctor was making jokes. Dear lord. "I came back, though. And you didn't do anything about it." Y/n huffed in amusement. "You never would have, huh?"

The Doctor swallowed. "This would always been the end, Y/n. At the best, you would have gotten older. You would have moved on. I can't... I can't."

Y/n nodded. "I know. I understand. I really do, Doctor. And with Rose too - I can't imagine that ever getting settled. But I need you to know-" But Y/n didn't get to finish his sentence, because there was that horrible sound and Y/n's scream and then everything went black. Except this time, he wasn't unconscious.

He was dead. Y/n was dead. As dead as it gets.

Death and Y/n didn't see to get along though, because only a few minutes later Y/n was gasping back to life, scrambling on the floor. He was disoriented and confused, but he saw a bright light and heard distant but familiar voices. He crawled around to get a better view without the large silver things he couldn't quite focus his vision on just yet. What he saw was Rose Tyler and the Doctor and the TARDIS. The Doctor kissed Rose and a light, far brighter than Y/n had seen anything be, traveled between the two of them and Rose fell.

"Doctor?" Y/n croaked.

The Doctor turned in surprise to see Y/n on the floor. "You were dead."

Y/n shrugged, his head spinning. "I feel... sick now. Just sick." His eyes fell to Rose. "I- Is she dead?"

"No," the Doctor reassured. "We need to go though. Come along, will you? We have lots to talk about." Y/n nodded, wobbling to his feet and then into the TARDIS as the Doctor scooped Rose up and set her on the floor of the TARDIS. He began to pilot the ship and as it set a course for what Y/n assumed was London, the Doctor turned on Y/n. He looked a little shaken. The glowing seemed to be moving under his skin, shimmering. But now it didn't seem beautiful, as it had before. It seemed wrong. Definitely dangerous. "Explain yourself."

"I... don't know."

The Doctor looked at Rose. "Ah." He looked back. "It seems I'm the one who has explaining to do." Again he glowed and the Doctor teetered, wincing in pain. "A... lot of explaining, it seems."

Y/n, worried and very confused and a little terrified, nodded. "Get on with it then. We don't have all day."

"Well... I don't," The Doctor agreed. "But I will. Or... you will, with someone else."

Y/n's breathing got heavier. "Doctor-"

"Y/n," the Doctor interrupted, moving close and taking Y/n's face between his hands. "Beautiful, empathetic, caring, protective Y/n. You've gotten your goodbye speeches, let me have mine."

And then the Doctor kissed Y/n, just like he had Rose. Except there was no light or glow, just a kiss. When they parted, it was because the Doctor groaned in pain. A pain that seemed to be growing. "Doctor?" Y/n rushed, scrambling to help the man stand.

The Doctor didn't ever get to say he loved Y/n back, but that kiss had said enough. It didn't really matter though, because it was then that Rose woke up. Then that everything would change forever. Not too much, but plenty enough. The Doctor changed. Changed into someone more controlled and reserved. Someone who couldn't express emotions as well as he could before. Y/n had changed too, though he didn't know that yet. He had changed into someone the Doctor couldn't accept.

To say, things were about to get really fucking complicated.

"He says that the yellow girl and her companion have the blue box, so they are the only ones able to speak for this planet."

"You can't," Harriet Jones, now Prime Minister, insisted.

"Someone has to be the Doctor," Rose began.

Whatever she was going to say was cut off by Y/n stepping forward though. No one questioned it. This entire time, Y/n had been the one who had seemed to have any idea on what to do. He didn't have much more a grip than Rose did, but what he did have was just enough that everyone seemed to naturally be stepping back to give him the reigns in the Doctor's place. Y/n stepped up and faced an alien race he had no idea how to defeat with no fear on his face. Maybe it was that the man had died twice now, or that his friends were in danger and nothing made Y/n more hostile than facing down people who threatened his friends. Y/n was different than the boy that had agreed to come along on a journey of a life time to make sure Rose was safe. Not so different that he didn't have mercy, but different enough that he not only didn't tolerate people who were willing to harm others, but he was willing to destroy them for the greater good. To protect those who could not protect themselves. That didn't stop him from pitying wasted life, but it did stop him from hesitating.

"Why do you want to kill humans?" Y/n demanded. The Sycorax leader faced Y/n down, but Y/n didn't step back even a little bit. He said something to Y/n, and the agents by Harriet translated.

"He says humans are simple and meaningless. They need to be conquered. They-"

"Now you stop right there," Y/n interrupted. Everyone behind Y/n and everyone in the crowd seemed to react to that. The people in fear, and the crowd in anger. It seemed no one liked that Y/n had interrupted the alien leader that was perfectly capable of killing. But Y/n didn't care about that. He needed to think, and he needed time to do that, and he was absolutely not about to let this monster conquer his planet without fighting back. He didn't know much or think as fast as the Doctor, but he could figure it out. He could figure SOMETHING out. Because he had to. "This planet isn't filled with a bunch of idiots. We may have a few bad eggs. We may make choices that are so incredibly daft, but we're incredible as well. We learn and grow and continue without being stopped. We defy death, even. We defy logic and reason. We're harder to wipe out than a hoard of roaches. We stick around and fight back. You can try your hardest to pin us under your thumb, or kill us off when we refuse, but it'll never be over and even if you do win this battle. Even if you do take this planet now. We will come back in such force that you will wish you had never made the mistake of messing with us. And it may not be now. It may not be in a decade, or several, or even a century. But it will happen, as it always does. And when it does happen, you will fear us."

"You want to be big? Then I will show you how small you are." Too late they all realized the Sycorax had spoken in English. Too late, because he flicked his staff and like a whip, a coil of electricity shot out and attached to Y/n's chest. He screamed and fell to a knee and his friends screamed behind him, but when the electricity left, Y/n was... fine.

Chaos erupted from the crowd. Y/n stood slowly, even his friends behind him whispering in chatter that sounded... fearful. What had just happened?

"SILENCE!" The Sycorax screamed. The crowd begrudgingly went hush, but a small voice from behind Y/n spoke up still.

"You should be dead. I watched him kill them with that- that- staff. You should be dead."

"And I'm not," Y/n brought up rather pointlessly. He sounded far more calm than he meant to though, so there was that.

The Sycorax leader stumbled back in obvious fear. Y/n stood taller. "That's impossible."

"It should be," A voice that was growing familiar spoke up. The small crowd behind Y/n parted and there stood the new man who was the Doctor but also wasn't. That man strutted forward, an expression on his face that was sort of bitter sweet, but leaning more bitter. "It doesn't sit well with me either, if I'm honest."

"Took you long enough," Y/n mumbled under his breath.

"Better late than never," the man shot back. And that was when Y/n saw the Doctor. If a bit more rude and quicker to respond... still the Doctor.

Long story short, the Doctor handled things as he always did. After Y/n's show of immunity to the Sycorax's one hit kill staff, there wasn't much work to do. There was calling the bluff of what turned out to be blood control, which couldn't go as far as the Sycorax said it could. And then there was the sword fight that was brought about by some law or another, but also threatened to happen because if the Sycorax leader didn't agree, the Doctor would "release" Y/n on him. It ended with the Doctor victorious, and Sycorax ship sailing off as the humans left all returned to the ground with the TARDIS.

Then, as they were running away, Harriet Jones shot them down with a beam from a group she called Torchwood, and killed them while their backs were turned.

"HOW COULD YOU DO THAT?" Y/n roared, rushing to the smaller woman. Harriet was suddenly shaking, faced with a man who seemed to be repelling death like it was a light cold and he had work to get to. "They were running away!"

"They could come back," she insisted rather quietly.

"They couldn't," The Doctor argued, standing just behind Y/n, at his side. "The fight - it was agreed. I won, Earth is free from them."

Harriet scoffed. "He attacked you the second you turned your back, and his people will surely do the same." Y/n flared but Harriet seemed to find her courage then. "You weren't there, Doctor. And you will not always be there. Y/n did a very good job of taking your place, but he won't always be here either. One day we will be faced with an enemy we cannot take down with a simple sword fight, and you may not be there to help."

"I should have told them to run from the monster," The Doctor sneered. "I should have told them to run as far and as fast as they could, because the real monster was sitting there, waiting for the moment to strike."

Harriet solidified herself. "I was there when that staff killed two good men. Right in front of me, and I could do nothing to stop it. I won't be helpless ever again. I have people to protect."

There was quiet for a moment, and then the Doctor stepped in front of Y/n, who had been stunned by such stupidity and selfishness that he was struck dumb. "You know, humans are so simple. I can end you entire career without lifting a single finger. I could do it without much trouble. Without even lifting one finger, all your hard work. Gone."

"Stop it," Harriet demanded, that fear from before returning.

"Six words," the Doctor stated calmly.

"Stop," Harriet hissed, coming undone by his terrifying calm.

"Just six words." And then he moved... but not to Harriet. He moved to the last man left that seemed to work with Harriet, and he leaned close and whispered something in the man's ear. Then he leaned away and turned around and walked away, hands in his pockets and face empty of regret or emotion in general. Harriet panicked behind them, begging the Doctor and the man the Doctor had spoken to tell her something. Anything. But she never got her answer.

Not in the way she wanted.

When they were away from her, Y/n rounded on the Doctor. "I'm still alive, and she said I shouldn't be."

The Doctor sighed. "When Rose looked into the heart of the TARDIS, she... brought you back. Honestly, I knew, and I saw, but I was in shock and in pain because I was dying and I was too scared to leave you behind. Far, far more scared of losing you than I was of what you had become."

Y/n looked as if he'd been slapped. "What do you mean, what I've become? You don't want me anymore?"

"That's the thing isn't it?" The Doctor sighed. "Rose doesn't even know. She forgot everything. And you weren't alive to see it. To get back to me, to us, she looked into the heart of the TARDIS. Like when Margaret became an egg. She looked and she gained immeasurable power. Power over time and space, completely. Over life, even. All she had to do was set your existence through out all time and space, and you're alive. But she didn't know how to hone it, so now you'll... probably always be alive. You can't die, I'd reckon."

"At all?" Y/n squeaked.

The Doctor shrugged. "There's no knowing for sure unless we test it, but if back there means anything, I'd say that no, you can't die. I'd even bet you can't age."

Y/n let out a breath. "So I'll be this age, alive, forever?"

"I'd say so," the Doctor confirmed. There was a moment of silence. "I feel guilty."

"Why?" Y/n asked, looking up from where his eyes had dropped.

A soft sigh escaped the Doctor then. "I'm glad of it." Y/n rose a questioning eyebrow, and the Doctor continued. "I've never been able to be really with someone before. I knew they'd go eventually. They die or move on or grow too old for this life, or get torn up by the life style or they're stolen from me. You... you're different, though. Humans age and get old, but I regenerate. I mean, a relationship like that would be one sided. Eventually I'd be alone again. But you don't age, or die, and I'm sitting here in a predicament where I just so happen to be in love with you." He released a breath, as if the words had been weighing him down. "It's so much easier to say that knowing I may actually not lose you."

Slowly, a smile rose to Y/n's face. "Well, if you don't already know I love you too I might have to kick your ass right here and now."

The Doctor released a shaky sort of laugh. After a second, he looked away, his smile fading. "Y/n, there's something you need to know about me."

Y/n sucked in a breath and released it again sharply, his hands fidgeting. "What about?"

"I've had a lot of companions, and I have lost every single one. Rose and you aren't the first, even though you two are... different." He shook his head. "But I had something real before this life. I had a family. I was a father. A husband. I had a life. And it was all taken from me."

For a second, Y/n didn't seem to know what to say. But then he found it, and whispered very gently, "Doctor, I'm weird. I don't... I don't fall in love, really. It's unusual for me to do so. I've only ever fancied one person other than you. I've never taken much to romance and it's never seemed important to me. Like you, the first person I felt like this for... they understood this feeling too. Their father died in a war and mother in childbirth and they spent their whole life being passed from person to person and never having a family or a home. This isn't my first time, though I will say that it is my second. I do know one thing though. If you need time to work this out. If you need something I can't fill... What I mean to say is, I'm happy when you're happy. I'm not asking you to marry me, or start a family with me or whatever. I'm not asking for an immediate serious relationship. Just because we feel the way we do about each other doesn't mean we have to limit ourselves to those feelings. I know you've felt love like this many times, and I know that... you may feel it again in the future, or even now." He shrugged it away. "I know this is going to take time. But I want you to know that I'm not going anywhere. Ever, it seems. That you can count on. Everything else... As long as you come back to me at the end of the day, I don't care about everything else."

And then the Doctor did something splendid. He kissed Y/n. And Y/n did something even greater. He kissed back.

It was a great kiss. One of many. Because this journey? It had only just begun!

Male readers: @sheepfather

#dr who #ninth doctor #tenth doctor #dr who imagine #dr who x reader #dr who x male reader #ninth doctor imagine #ninth doctor x male reader #ninth doctor x reader #tenth doctor imagine #tenth doctor x reader #tenth doctor x male reader #male reader #dr who fanfic #dr who angst

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yandearest · 5 years ago

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May The Odds Be Ever in Your Favor (Hoseok x Reader Hunger Games AU) Chapter 1: The Reaping

Summary - Living in District 4 you never thought you would have to worry about being selected for the Hunger Games. With a training centre right near the dock of the houseboat you lived and fished from, your district was known for volunteers who trained their whole lives for a shot at glory and riches. But at age 18, your name is called and no girls volunteer to take your place. Your devastation is answered when Kim Namjoon volunteers for the males shortly after. Tall, muscular, highly intelligent and charming, the years of diligent preparation have bestowed Namjoon with the expectation of being the next District 4 champion after Finnick Odair last won 3 years ago.

Fishing for a living has granted you skills with a knife but, as your mentor Finnick is quick to describe, your beautiful face may well be your best asset.

Upon arrival in the Capitol you are quickly faced with the reality that Namjoon may not even be the biggest danger inside the Arena. Especially when you capture the obsessive attention of District 2′s own volunteer, and killing machine, Jung Hoseok. Hope soon fades from ‘survival’ to ‘the mercy of a painless death’ but Hoseok certainly has other plans.

Pairing - Hoseok x (fem)Reader

Genre - thriller, angst, yandere

Word Count 4.6K

Warnings - [in later chapters] major character death, graphic depictions of violence, swearing, obsession, dubcon-smut (smut will be marked so reading is optional), gore, unrealistically beautiful oc because I’m a sucker for that shitty trope and want to live vicariously through my writing (sue me)

The following is a dark fic featuring a yandere character, violence, obsession, and coercion. By no means does writing about this in a fictional setting condone any of those behaviours, much like Stephen King writing horror doesn’t mean he approves of psychotic killers in reality. Please avoid reading if any of these warnings makes you uncomfortable.

Cross posted on A03 so people can subscribe for updates/notifications

What little shred of hope for survival you may have had, after hearing your name announced from the reaping, was immediately squashed minutes later by two simple words. “I volunteer”.

Volunteers from District 4 were not uncommon. There was a not-so-secret training complex the capitol turned a blind eye to, in a warehouse near the docks. During your time in school you knew of several kids who trained before and after classes. At the age of twelve some of them dropped out all together, with the sole purpose of training every waking second of the day so they could volunteer at eighteen. There was no need for an education if your only purpose in life was to compete in a death match that offered a lifetime of rewards to the winner.

After the misfortune of having your name drawn you looked around, silently begging for one of the girls to come up and replace you, only for no takers. But when Kim Namjoon eagerly announced his intentions of volunteering (the reaped twelve-year-old boy on stage immediately bursting into grateful tears and rushing back to his mother in the square) it was easy to understand why no one had stepped up this year. Back when you had attended school, before dropping out to assist your father on his fishing boat after your mother died, Namjoon had been in some of your classes –although he very rarely showed up. He was immensely popular with everyone; in part because of his handsome physique and model like dimples, partially because of his superior intelligence, but mostly because it was well known he was by far the leader from all the kids in training.

You had never attended a training session (more fool you for thinking you would never be unlucky enough to have your name drawn, and banking on one of the girls who did train to take your place if you did) but the center near the wharf was close to where your family’s boat — that functioned as both a fishing ship and your house — was docked. During the many occasions you had walked past, you sometimes stopped to peer through a crack in the doorway and watch. A majority of the times you had seen Namjoon inside amongst the group of around twenty regulars; working out with weights, sparring with an array of weapons, or climbing the rope attached to the ceiling that was surely 30 feet high with nothing but cement to drop back down to. The years of work had turned the dimpled twelve-year-old you once shared a math class with into a lethal killing machine. And now you were going to be stuck in an arena with you as one of his targets.

You stood frozen as Namjoon strode up on stage, a grin on his face, waving to the camera before shaking the hand of the capitol’s representative — a pastel blue haired woman by the name of Periwinkle Eveweather. You could tell Periwinkle much preferred Namjoon to you from the twinkle in her eye at how well he was playing up to the camera. There would be no need for her to have to force him to act like being slaughtered like an animal was an honor, like she would for you. The next moments passed far too quickly in a blur, being lead off stage to bid farewell to your families. As you sobbed in your father’s arms, an only child saying your last goodbye, Namjoon was getting a pat on the back from his older sister, a previous volunteer and victor. Shortly after you were ushered on board to the train where you now sat, Namjoon at your side and your mentor sitting across the table.

A small part of your brain found it difficult to take Finnick Odair as a mentor seriously given he was younger than you. But your rational side was quick to silence that judgment with a reminder that exact dismissal of his age was a major contributing factor to his win three years ago. The feeling of despair ate away at your insides as Finnick took an immediate liking to Namjoon. You couldn’t blame him for it, Namjoon was by far the more likely of the two of you to survive, so it only made sense for him to put more attention on the candidate with the best chance, but it still made you feel awful none the less.

“And what about you YN?”

You jumped feeling Namjoon’s hand tapping your leg softly under the table, his head wordlessly nodding in Finnick’s direction without making any eye contact to you. You had become so distracted by the mug of tea in a decorative porcelain cup in your hands, you failed to recognize your mentor’s piercing sea green eyes were now focused on you.

“Sorry, what about my what?” you mumbled dumbly, feeling incredibly insecure at Finnick’s sigh.

“Your skills, what do you bring to the games?”

Well that explained why you had tuned out, there was no need for you to listen to Namjoon describing all the potential ways he was going to kill you within a week or so. And there were a hell of a lot of ways.

“I don’t know really, I’m not someone who’s trained like Namjoon,” you paused to think, pretending not to notice Namjoon’s smug smirk in the corner of your peripheral vision as Finnick frowned slightly.

“Neither was I, and that caused a lot of the careers to underestimate me,” Finnick replied, shooting Namjoon a pointed look which caused his smirk to disappear. You tried not to smile at that, settling instead for relaxing slightly into your seat.

“I can fish, so depending on the arena I can potentially find food, but more importantly I know my way around with a knife,” you declared, feeling a little more confident. The hopeless despair was still overwhelming but the least you could do for yourself, and your father, was to go out with honor.

“Very good,” Finnick nodded “don’t underestimate your face either.”

“My face?” You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion. “How am I supposed to kill anyone with that?”

Finnick sighed, leaning further back into the lounge he was occupying on his own, pinching the bridge of his nose on his handsome face in exasperation.

“Both of you listen, this is potentially more important than all of those little training sessions or fishing catches the both of you have ever made combined. You’re clearly genetically blessed to continue District 4’s reputation of having the most beautiful tributes, you in particular” He paused to lazily point in your direction. “If you actually want to win the games, you want the people of the capitol to adore you. And they’re a city of shallow cunts,” another pause to shoot a charming smile in Periwinkle’s direction “no offense”.

“Offense taken!” Periwinkle gasped indignantly but Finnick was already speaking over her without a care.

“And as shallow cunts what these people love, more than anything in their pathetic little vapid lives, is beauty. You,” a point to Namjoon, “have been training your whole life for this and will have a body to represent that. Show it off. They love flair, they love confidence, they love a show. Flex those biceps for them, they’ll go mad. Flash your abs and they’ll fall in love. And work those dimples, cause these suckers sure worked for me, got me a trident,” Finnick grinned to show off his smile and twin indents on each corner of his mouth, Namjoon mirrored the gesture and you felt your heart clench at how easily he seemed to turn on his charm. Tall, well built and handsome, he was just as gorgeous as Finnick. Too bad he was very likely about to be the literal death of you.

“And you,” Finnick turned his attention to your direction and you felt Namjoon’s eyes burning into you from the side “you’ll be the prettiest thing they’ve seen in years, possibly in the history of the games”

Your face flushed at the comment, even though you knew it wasn’t intended as a compliment. There was no point in sweet little lies to butter you up and the fact of the matter was you knew you had an aesthetically pleasing face. Your facial features were in perfect balance, skin clear, thick hair that fell to the middle of your back and eyes that you had been told sparkled like stars in the night.

“They’ll love that shit,” his finger lazily circled around pointing to your cheeks that were flushed in embarrassment at his candid assessment of your appearance.

“These people are so used to artificial, that something so beautiful and pure will be coveted like the fattest diamond they could possibly hang from their necks. You ever fucked a guy, sweetheart?”

“Excuse me?” you balked at the invasive question, earning a sharp laugh out of Namjoon, a scandalized shriek from Periwinkle, and an eye roll from Finnick.

“I’ll take that for a yes and don’t worry I’m not interested. The capitol thrives on corruption, greed, and a need to claim rare treasures for their own. Put an innocent little dove like you, with a face like yours, in front of them and they’ll go insane. Act right at the parade and in your interviews and you’ll have sponsors gifting you everything you could ever need in that arena”.

You sat wide eyed not even knowing how to respond. You didn’t bother with arguing over the status of your supposed virginity because whether it was true or not didn’t actually matter, it was all about the perception. If getting dolled up and fluttering your eyelashes could potentially result in a knife being dropped from the sky in the arena, you could suck it up and give these disgusting people what they wanted.

The train ride to the capitol took just under three days in total. During that time Finnick and Namjoon spent a lot of time together, which you weren’t surprised with in the least. It was only natural to favor the tribute with the better odds, as much as Finnick’s little speech on the first day tried to make you think you could have a chance. Finnick still made some time for you though, which was mostly spent on guiding you how to attract sponsors. You spent a majority of the time in your room, a lot of it crying, most of it sleeping, and some of it playing around with technologies you had never had access to before in your life. The only time you really saw Namjoon was during breakfast and dinner where you ate together with Finnick to discuss district strategy. You weren’t surprised at all by Namjoon’s plan to join the career pack, but you were slightly surprised when he spoke of you as a part of that plan. You were a little annoyed he didn’t even think to ask your opinion, but logically speaking it’s not like you had any option. It was either join them or make yourself an easy target. Plus, any alliance with Namjoon reduced your need to have kill any other tributes personally. The only thing now was to hope districts 1 and 2 were as receptive to the idea as you were.

When you arrived at the capitol you were immediately ushered into a clinic that was like a fusion between a spa and a hospital. You were stripped, examined, and assessed by a doctor before being dressed in a paper thin hospital gown. After a painful injection (“that’s your tracker dear, so the capitol can monitor you in the arena”) you were passed over to the beauty department who scrubbed, exfoliated, waxed, showered, moisturized, treated, conditioned and polished your entire body from head to toe. But at the end when you were standing before a mirror, you could see the results were worth it.

As Finnick had stated, you were already beautiful to start with, but it was like taking an uncut gem and polishing the stone to make it shine. Your hair was a couple of inches shorter with all the damage from years of saltwater being trimmed off. A treatment of conditioners you couldn’t care to remember had tamed your thick locks into smooth waves that had been layered to frame your face and flow prettily down your back. Whatever impurities that existed on your skin before had been entirely lasered away, and your whole complexion was now soft and glowing. Your eyebrows had been plucked into identical manicured arches and some sort of needled gun had permanently filled them in. A gel had been applied to your lips to boost their plumpness, without overly inflating them or drastically changing their shape, giving your mouth a cherubic quality. Staring at your reflection you raised a perfectly manicured finger to poke at your cheek, feeling the new silky smoothness beneath your fingertip, watching as your mirror image copied the action. It was surreal. You recognized the person in front of you as yourself, all of your features were still the same, but just somehow perfected?

You mostly ignored the gushing of your newly assigned stylist team — a set of triplets named Ruby, Garnet and Quartz — as they picked out garments, stretched measuring tape across and around your body and argued over what colors would bring out your eyes the best. They were sweet and well meaning with their compliments, but the growing nerves over being prepped for the chariot parade in a few hours made you unreceptive.

The concept they eventually decided on for your fishing district was ‘Rulers of the Sea’ and you were dressed in a Grecian inspired gown. The iridescent blue and green material, that sparkled like the sun reflecting off the ocean, was clasped at the top of your left shoulder with a silver broach in the shape of a starfish. Intricate embroidery was patterned around around the waist where the fabric was cinched tightly to create an overly enhanced hourglass silhouette. The bottom half flowed to your sandal clad feet and seemed to sway with the slightest of moments, a split on the right ran to the middle part of your thigh. Your eyes were a smoky combination of the colors from your dress, lashes coated in extensions and a layer of mascara to give you a seductive yet doe eyed appearance. There was a strange dichotomy in your styling where they were attempting to preserve your ‘natural’ and ‘innocent’ traits whilst simultaneously taking full advantage of the fact you were eighteen in order to market sex appeal.

Your favorite part (that you hated to admit even liking given the circumstance you were even in) was your hair. A section from each side had been pulled away and pinned at the back in a princess style, with numerous tiny clips of glowing sea shells and starfish holding it in place. Glittery extensions had been clipped in tastefully creating an appearance as if your hair was literally shining. This was then finished off by an ornate tiara placed on the top of your head.

By the time you were finished your stylists were practically in tears, fawning over you and calling you’re their greatest masterpiece. They mistook your eyes watering as pride in their work and not disgust at their pride in dressing a cow off before sending it to the slaughterhouse.

“No dear, you can’t cry and ruin all that make up we just spent so much time perfecting” Ruby chided, dabbing at your eyes with a tissue as Quartz and Garnet guided you out the door and into the small vehicle which was about to take you from the clinic to the parade. You didn’t dignify her with a response, merely grabbing the tissue from her hand as you were forced into the car. As soon as you were inside the car sped off, arriving at the destination very shortly after. From behind your tinted windows you could see horses being lead to empty chariots and your first sight of the other tributes, the people you were either going to have to kill or be killed by.

When the car stopped, Finnick was the one to open your door and offer you a hand to get out, which you accepted. As you stood up he appraisingly ran his eyes over all the details of your make-over, before nodding his approval.

“They did well,” he stated and you nodded your head in passive agreement as he dropped your hand to press his to the small of your back and guide you towards your chariot. Namjoon was already there, dressed in his own Grecian toga of the same fabric with a crown on the top of his newly styled hair. Sensing your arrival, he turned to look at you. Namjoon’s eyes widened comically before quickly composing his features almost as instantly as he had reacted. “Very well,” Finnick whispered, and you allowed an amused puff of air out.

“Your chariot awaits my dear,” Finnick said with a mock bow as he nudged you towards Namjoon, who extended his arm for you to hold on to. Not sure what else to do, you placed your hand delicately on his forearm, his other hand then coming to rest over the top. For a brief moment as Namjoon guided you both into the chariot, you could almost imagine you were a princess being taken to a ball by a handsome prince, but any such delusions were ruined by what Namjoon whispered next.

“It’s such a shame there can only be one winner, you really look good by my side.”

Your jaw clenched and you moved to rip your hand off his arm but his grip over yours instantly tightened with a laugh, as if expecting that exact reaction.

“Calm down princess, I don’t plan on killing your pretty little face for a while yet.”

You looked up at him like he was insane as the chariot began to move forward. He thought your reaction was from fear he was going to kill you now? And not that he perceived your life as only having value from being pretty enough for him? You were furious and about to rip into him before you heard the approaching roar of the crowd ahead at the end of the tunnel. Namjoon was oblivious to your rage, a perfectly poised smile, flexing his dimples that Finnick would be proud of, already painted on his face. You paused, for all you knew that could be an attempt to psych you out before facing the crowds, potentially losing you sponsor opportunities. Turning away from Namjoon, you took a deep breath to try and compose yourself. You plastered the docile soft-smiled wide eyed expression on your face that you had practiced with Finnick on the train, as your carriage emerged form the tunnel and onto the road lined with screaming spectators.

The entire parade was a blur of flashing lights, fireworks, thunderous cheering and echoes from the microphone that distorted whatever message the president greeted you with. By the time your chariot returned to the tunnel your mind was entirely blank but with the satisfied nod from Finnick as he waited to welcome you both back, you knew you had done well.

“If District 2 is anything to go by then you’ve won yourself a lot of admirers tonight” Finnick practically sang as he helped you down. Confused by his words you turned around looking for the other district to see the duo from two, the carriage over from yours. Dressed in gladiator styled garments, that was common from them every year, the girl was fiddling with a ruby dagger (you hoped was just a prop) whilst the boy was staring straight at you. ‘Boy’ was the wrong word to describe him, as he definitely had to have been the same age as you, if anything he looked slightly more mature than the legal age to even be here. He was tall, though not as tall as Namjoon, and lithe. Beneath a decorative breastplate you could see his sun kissed golden skin adorned with the toned definition of his pectoral and abdominal muscles. His face was incredibly handsome, by far the most handsome of any of the male tributes. Rich copper hair had been styled to frame his aristocratic features; a high bridged pointed nose, high cheekbones, sharp jawline and rich dark chocolate brown eyes that were intently focused on you.

“Speaking to other tributes before training is technically not allowed, but it’s enforced the same way as your training centers are, so not at all. You’ve got five minutes until those cars arrive to take you to the living quarters, go talk to the careers and work out an alliance,” You broke the eye contact to look at Finnick as he spoke, clearly having witnessed your little interaction.

Namjoon took the lead, confidently stepping off the carriage with a winning smile and striding towards the pair from two. With a sigh you hitched up the long material of your dress and followed behind him. You could still feel the male’s eyes burning into your skull as you looked across to notice the pair from District 1 also making their way over — their own mentor likely having given them the same advice as your own.

“I’m Namjoon and this is YN,” you weren’t particularly pleased by Namjoon deciding to speak on your behalf, but chose to roll your eyes behind him rather than interrupting. “We’re interested in continuing a long standing tradition of successful career pack alliances. I assume from you joining us over here, that you are as well.”

“I would typically say that to assume only makes an ‘ass’ out of ‘u’ and ‘me’, but in this instance you are correct,” the other male from District 1 spoke. You tried to stifle a laugh, but the warning glare Namjoon shot you from the corner of his eye told you that it wasn’t successful. You merely smiled back and blinked innocently with a shrug.

“My name’s Yoongi, and an alliance would be in all of our best interests.” He was shorter than Namjoon and District 2, only an inch or two taller than yourself, but somehow still just as intimidating. His pale skin was contrasted by pitch black hair and sharp coal like eyes that were openly assessing the group of you.

“Krystal,” his district mate offered by means of introduction, and you wondered if the two were siblings. She shared his light complexion, dark eyes and her sleek midnight hair was dead straight down past her waist. Both were dressed in black, their outfits embodying the luxury their district was known for; Yoongi in a tailored suit with subtle embroidery detail, Krystal in an elegant fitted gown made of the same fabric, both topped off with luxurious fur capes draped over their shoulders.

“I’m Athena and he’s Hoseok,” the girl from two spoke. She appeared to be the same height as Yoongi but you noticed a heel on her sandals giving her an extra few inches. You couldn’t bring yourself to look across to Hoseok, knowing his gaze still hadn’t broken since staring at you from the carriage.

“Is that real?” you asked, gesturing towards the dagger Athena had been playing with before that was now held limply in her right hand.

“Why don’t we find out,” she replied with a smirk, instantly flipping the dagger in her hands to point the tip between your eyes.

“Athena!” Hoseok hissed dangerously, slapping the dagger from her hands and cause it to fall onto the ground below. The lack of metallic ‘clang’ revealing it as fake.

“Calm down, it was a joke!” Athena snapped back, reaching down to pick it back up, whilst shaking her head in annoyance. Before you could assure her it was fine, Hoseok stepped forward to present you with his own version of the prop. Reaching out he grabbed your wrist to place the ‘dagger’ in your hand.

“See, the material is just a type of fiber that gives the illusion of metal, but is really not hard at all.” Gently he ran the blade along your palm, and true to his word there was no edge at all. But the image still looked real and seeing a blade dancing across your skin, knowing someone was going to try to kill you with a real one very soon, made you feel ill. Sensing your discomfort from the trembling hand, Hoseok immediately pocketed the knife, but still maintained his hold on your wrist.

“Don’t worry, I’m not going to hurt you, angel,” he spoke softly and you frantically looked to the others to see if they could hear him. Namjoon who was the closest merely looked amused, Athena was showing Yoongi the fake dagger, whilst Krystal had her eyebrow raised in your direction.

“I hope not,” you awkwardly tried to joke, pulling your wrist slightly to subtly try and break the hold, but he only tightened his grip forcing you to look up and back into his eyes again. His gaze from a distance had already been intense but up close it was heart stopping. There was a passion in his eyes you had never seen before in your life and it was solely focused entirely on you. It was frightening, you couldn’t imagine what you had possibly done to warrant being on the receiving end of something so intense. You tilted your head down and away from the others, humiliated over being so easily intimidated. If an attractive man holding your wrist and making eye contact with you was all it took to fluster you, you may as well just sign your own death certificate now.

“Hey, look at me,” he whispered, dropping your wrist to place his finger on your chin and raise your head back upwards, though you kept your eyes lowered, staring at his jawline to avoid direct eye contact again.

“I’m promise I won’t hurt you, love. Not now, not ever.”

You were about to ask him how he could possibly say something like that given you were about to become direct competitors in a battle to the death, when a sharp whistle stole your attention. Snapping your head to the side you saw Finnick jerk his head, indicating for you and Namjoon to return. You exhaled in relief, grateful for the reprieve.

“We’ll see you tomorrow,” Namjoon said to the group, moving next to you and causing Hoseok to pull his hand away. You nodded to show your agreement with Namjoon whilst making eye contact with the other three you barely had a chance to speak to. You hoped they didn’t think that you were somehow forming something just with Hoseok based on his actions. You were going to need all the help you possibly could get if you wanted a chance to survive.

“Tomorrow,” Krystal agreed, making proper eye contact with you for the first time. She was smaller in height than you, thinner too, but somehow carried a cold and intimidating aura. You offered her a polite smile in return and a nod, relieved when she nodded back, before you returned to Finnick with Namjoon.

“How did it go? Looked pretty good” Finnick asked just as the capitol vehicle pulled up to take you to the tribute quarters.

“It seems our little dove here won’t just have the capitol for an admirer,” Namjoon smirked, getting into the car.

“So I saw,” Finnick muttered as a reply to Namjoon’s back, then turned to face you.

“Don’t let him psych you out,” he said, stepping aside so you could follow Namjoon into the vehicle.

You glanced at Namjoon before turning back to see Hoseok standing by his car but staring directly at you again. His eyes were still radiating the same intense passion from moments ago, you had no idea what to make of it.

“Who?” you whispered back to Finnick, ducking your head as you stepped inside. Finnick moved to shut the door.

“Both of them”

This is basically an introductory chapter to gauge reception. Future updates should be longer. I have the whole fic plotted and the outline itself is 5.9K words and this chapter was only based on the first paragraph. The next update will focus on the training sessions/interview with Caesar and the update after should be the one where they actually enter the arena.

Feedback is much loved, but please avoid asking for updates. I don’t have a schedule but I do have crippling depression so I write when the motivation hits lol

#yandere hoseok #yandere bts #bts x reader #hoseok x reader #yandere bts fic #hunger games au #hoseok fic #hoseok au #hoseok x you #yandere jung hoseok #yandere #dark jhope #dark bts #dark bts au

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kamyru · 4 years ago

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“Just like her mother...“ (Kaga x MC)

Soooo... I know that MC isn’t dumb, taking into consideration her character development and that she finished as the best PSA student. Though, sometimes I think what will be Kaga’s reaction if he finds out that she’s very academically intelligent. She reads a lot of books, knows many languages, finished a very good university, things like this. But take into consideration that being academically intelligent doesn’t require to be intelligent in day to day life, so she still can be pretty naive, just like she is portrayed.

(I swear I’ll do the requests I still have in my inbox. And if anyone is interested, my requests are always open so you can send me asks, if you’re ready to wait a little.)

Word counting: 1665

After a very long day at work, Kaga finally made it home. It was way past midnight and he was sure that everyone was already asleep. Though, when he opened the door, he saw light coming from the living room. He let out a sigh and prepared a long speech about why everyone has to be asleep if he comes home so late. However, when he stepped inside the room before his eyes appeared an astonishing view.

His wife was peacefully sleeping on the armchair, with their daughter fast asleep on her. An open book was set beside them. Kaga looked at them and a big smile forming on his face. It was obvious that his daughter looked just like him. Everyone who ever saw her thought that it’s their obligation to say this. Though, only he knew how alike was she with her mother.

The day she was born, Ayumu said: “I bet she’ll be as smart as you.” For him, it was obvious that being Kaga’s child is impossible not to be intelligent.

“She is way smarter than I was,” he said for himself, while he took her in his arms, to carry her to her bed. “Just like her mother.”

When he gave her a goodnight kiss and put her favorite toy near her, a voice broke the silence.

“How was your day? I’ll make your tea and fill the bath. You can relax,” said MC, while rubbing her sleepy eyes.

“Go to bed. I don’t want to sleep on the floor, only because you fell asleep right here.”

Kaga gave MC a quick peck on the lips and entered the bathroom. It is a blessing to come home after an endless-like day, see your beautiful and lovely wife holding your daughter and knowing that here you’ll always find love and peace.

While relaxing every tense muscle in the bathtub, he thought about the case he had to solve these days. The culprit was just making fun of them, leaving them everywhere shreds of evidence. Though, it took them too long to understand it. He could bet that if MC had been on that case, she would have helped a lot. Also, she would have been the perfect person to interrogate the culprit.

He understood that she is very intelligent when he saw how hard-working she was, how many questions she put, how she gave every drop of her energy in learning the lessons. Yet, he saw the extent of this only after they were dating for a while.

The moment Kaga entered her room for the first time, he was taken aback by the quantity of the book in there. He didn’t know at what to look, so MC lost him for quite a long time, letting him examine every book on the shelves. Besides Japanese authors like Mori Ogai, Haruki Murakami, Kobo Abe, Yasunari Kawabata, were Kant, Nietzsche, Hesse, Mann and Goethe in German, Dickens, London, Vonnegut, Joyce and Steinbeck in English and many other writers in different languages. He had no idea that such a small room could be filled with so many books. The one that caught his attention was a small and old one, which title he couldn’t read, but he knew it was in French.

MC saw him taking the book in his hand and examining it. A warm smile appeared on her face.

“It’s my favorite book. I learned French because of it. Here are two novels written by Antoine de Saint-Exupery.”

“What they are about? I only know his ‘Little Prince’ because mom read it to me when I was little.”

“The first one - ‘Night Flight’ is about sacrifice, from different points of view. The second one - ‘Flight to Arras’ is about Humans and Humanity. I read them separately when I was a teenager and liked them so much that decided to learn French to read them in original. And, as you can see, I did it and bought them when I was studying in France.”

She looked at them like one looks at one’s old friends. Kaga opened it and although he couldn’t understand a word from there, he saw a lot of pencil marks on each page. He made a mental note to find these novels in any language known by him and read them. They were something important for his girlfriend, so he simply had to know about what they are.

“You said that you studied in France?” he suddenly asked.

“I studied there for a year while I did my bachelor’s and then chose to do my master’s there.”

Kaga lifted his eyes and looked attentively at her. “What university have you finished here?”

“Kyoto University. Why?”

She was responding so genuine and simply, that for a moment he thought that she was just a very good actress. It was very rare to see people who finished good universities that aren’t emanating pride and don’t expect to see the other person taken completely aback by their smartness. But she was so simple about this, that he was more than confused. He wanted to give her more questions, to know how many languages she knew, what specialty she had, how she managed to have a master’s degree, a work experience in police and still be so young.

The next time he was surprised by her knowledge was when she took the responsibility to take care of a teenager who was waiting to find out news about his parents. The boy didn’t want to move an inch before detectives were going to say something about his lost parents. He didn’t even care about the department he was disturbing.

MC sat near him and gave him warm tea and sandwiches. At first, she didn’t say a thing, just waited till he finished eating. When he looked at her questioningly, she simply told him: “It’s a theory that trying to focus your thoughts on something that needs a lot of thinking helps you to stop crying.”

The boy wanted to say that he wasn’t crying but understood that his face was too puffy to make her believe him. He simply continued watching her.

“Are you coming directly from school?” she asked, looking at his bag and uniform.

He nodded. A soft smile appeared on her face.

“Let’s finish your homework, then.”

This time, the boy looked at her like she was the Mad Hatter in person.

“I don’t think I can concentrate on something like this right now.”

“I will help. What form are you?”

In no time, she convinced him to take into consideration her offer. Every person in the office gave them a skeptical stare. The thing was that MC didn’t only make him unbend a little, but explained every exercise he had questions on. Math, science, English or Japanese? She made it look so easy, that all the workers in the office refreshed and completed their knowledge from high school while accidentally listening to her.

When a dealer was caught and no one could understand what language he was speaking, Kaga instantly thought about MC. He still didn’t know how many languages she knew, but he hoped that, with a little bit of luck, she could be of some help.

She entered the interrogation room. She asked him some fast questions in Japanese. When the dealer started to speak in the unknown language, a smirk appeared on MC’s face. She said an only phrase that made him completely change his expression. The verdict was simple: “He knows Japanese. He is only bluffing.”

“How you found this out? What did you say to him?” asked the detectives.

“That he is making a pure job faking a Vietnamese accent.”

Kaga knew that MC was constantly learning something. That she was yearly reading more books than most people read in their entire life. That she was solving problems at math, physics and chemistry only for fun. He knew that her brain was keeping inside more information than anyone can imagine.

Still, every time someone finds out that his daughter can read at three years, already understands French and Mandarin besides Japanese and he can’t even remember at what age she learned how to count, they are praising him for giving her good genes. Because everyone knew that he graduated from a prestigious university, that he had fantastically good grades, that his logic is impeccable. But only a few knew what MC was hiding inside her head. He was the lucky one to see that every day. To be each time amazed by her thinking.

So, every time someone was giving him too much credit for his daughter’s education, he had to return them to reality and tell the truth. To give his wife the praising she deserves.

Kaga finally finished his bath. While trying to dry his hair with the towel, he entered the bedroom to look at his lovely wife, hoping deep inside that she was still awake. He felt the urge to hug her tightly and to sink in her cozy smell.

“I see that you’re already asleep, you mo... smart woman.”

MC made a wonderful job suppressing a smile. She knew that it was rare to hear Kaga making a compliment. Though, she knew that every time he thought that she isn’t listening, he couldn’t stop himself from verbally appreciating her.

When he finally got in bed, she rolled near him, putting her hand on his broad chest and her head on his shoulder.

“Good night, Hyogo” she whispered lovingly.

Kaga blushed. Kissing her hair, he soon fell asleep. He made a mental note to ask her something the next morning. Though, when he woke up he didn’t remember if he wanted to find out if she heard him saying that she is smart, if he wanted to know her thoughts about the case he just finished or something else. Instead, he chose to made her remember how much he loves her and how important she is to him.

#her love in the force #hlitf #hyogo kaga #voltage inc

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buddiewho · 4 years ago

Text

Begrudgingly, I re-watched the date scene. Now that I was actually paying close attention...it was an alarm sound from an iPhone. Therefore, this means Eddie did set an alarm to remind himself of the promise to be home in time to put Christopher to bed. Yet, my brain still keeps questioning the entire thing. Okay, Eddie's having a tough time with the fourth grade math. It's math, personally, I don't blame him. Anyhow, Ana makes her cute joke about 2+2 still equals 4. Then I thought, if it were that easy then why are we making the equation so damn hard? So damn hard that it led to Christopher being mad enough to run away to Buck. Super hard to the point Ana even mentions "taking a break" because Christopher is at this breaking point already so should we even move forward? "I don't want you going anywhere..." juxtaposed to Buck saying to your son, “I’m not going anywhere.” Which adds another piece to this equation because Christopher felt that he’d lose Buck to his Dad dating...? *cracks knuckles* If the equation is so simple. If it's 2+2=4 (and yeah I know they're 3), but if it's 2+2=4 then it's easy. The outcome should eventually look like Future Tense (4x03), but maybe with kisses between out and proud boyfriends co-parenting Christopher. Really it's so easy to manipulate the 4x08 equation because it could've gone like this (if we weren't doing a slow burn, I suppose) and of course, I took many liberties as to imply one of them is already aware of the feelings they caught:

"Hey Buck, I need you to come over. We're going to help Christopher with his math homework." There was groan on the other end of the line. "Why me? I can't do math," Buck announces without hesitation. He really doesn't want to do math, but it's Eddie and it's Chris so of course he was going to end up dragging himself over to the house.

"Come on. I don't get understand it. I need your help more than him. Besides, we might end up goggling shit, when Christopher isn't looking because I don't want him getting into that habit to do his homework. So get over here. We'll order pizza and maybe by the end of the homework session, we could play video games or something."

"Sounds enticing, but it's still math," Buck said as he was getting his shoes on. "Who am I kidding? I'll be there." Eddie laughed and hung up. __

"Buck!" Christopher said from the couch as he entered. "Hey, little man, I hear you need help with some math homework." "Did my Dad really call you?" "Yes, he did so apparently it's that bad. Don't know how I'm going to help. I was terrible at math." "Well, if it's the three of us, I think we'll do just fine," Christopher said so nonchalantly, but it tortured Buck's heart a little bit. It was a heart wrenching pang of sweet sweet happiness at the sheer acceptance from Christopher.

Pizza plates surrounded a notebook and worksheets. The three of them sat back on the couch; Buck and Eddie next to each other, Chris on the other side of Eddie. They were about fed up with this one problem. "I don't get it, Dad." "Yeah, me too," added Buck. "Yeah, me three," Eddie sighed. "We're nearly there, I think. If not I'm looking up the answers and that'll have to do."

"Wouldn't that be cheating?" Christopher asked. "Sort of," Eddie loosely explained. "Think of it as calling on an expert, a math expert, or a teacher," Buck explained some more. "But we don't use it every time. Just as the last resort." Christopher thought on it and then just changed the subject, "Can we take a break? Let's play a game before I have to go to bed."

"Yeah, sure. Let's take a break. I don't think it's due for a couple days anyway." Eddie agreed. Buck leaned close, their shoulders now touching. "So what happened to not looking up answers in front of him?"

"This math problem pissed me off," Eddie said through gritted teeth. Then he softened. "Thanks for the save with that explanation." "It's all good. So Christopher are we playing the usual?" "Yeah, the pirate against the wolf that's the fighting game we always play." "Maybe the two of you should try different characters?" "No," they both said in unison and Eddie just laughed. He started to clean up their mess as Buck jumped up to help Christopher get the game turned on. Eddie came back and Buck was surprised when he sat directly next to him instead of putting Christopher in the middle. Buck wasn't going to complain. Then something shitty happened. Something really shitty. Eddie touches their shoulders again and then whispers, "You know how I told you I ran into Christopher's old teacher Ana Flores. I should call her? It's just you mentioned teacher earlier and I thought..." Eddie's voice trailed off and Buck tried not to press the controller buttons harder than needed. When Buck didn't immediately respond, Eddie seemed to forget what he said because he went on to loudly say, "Buck, you really should change your character. You never win as the pirate."

Buck chuckled. "I like the pirate. I'd be a pirate if I could." "Of course you would." "And I'd be a wolf," Christopher interjects. "Nice choice," Eddie tells his son. "What about you Dad? What would you be?" "Probably a ninja or something," Buck offers. "Maybe," Eddie muses. "But I was thinking a simple, clean, and efficient boxer." "Practical," Buck rolls his eyes. "Where's the imagination?" "Okay, pirate, I'll be your first mate then." Buck smirks, wondering if there were any implications beyond that statement. "No, you'd be part of the crew, swabbing the deck of my ship," he jokes. "I see how it is," Eddie bit his lip. "All right. Expect a mutiny led by me then."

"I win!" Christopher announces, pulling them out of their imaginary world. "Of course, you do." Buck smiles. Eddie looks at the time, not believing that much of it had passed. "How about a story before bed?" Eddie asks Chris. "Not from Buck." "Oh, yeah, I don't blame you," Eddie gently elbows Chris. "It's because of the kid in the rotisserie isn't it?" "Yup," said Chris. "Hey! That was a cautionary tale." "Yeah, okay," Eddie gave him a playful glare. "All right, let's get to bed." They were at Christopher's door when Buck stopped Eddie. Christopher shuffled inside towards his bed. "I got a story for tonight," Buck stated. "And what's that?" "Hansel and Gretel." Eddie's fist clenched and he contemplated playfully punching Buck's arm, but he didn't. He just looked him square in the face and crossed his arms. Buck lost it at the sort of scolding Dad face, "I'm kidding. I'm kidding. We'll read something light and fluffy. Like Little Red Riding Hood. It has a wolf."

"Buck!" "All right, all right, I'm done." Buck held up his hands. Christopher had sat on the edge of his bed, half-listening to them. "So pajamas. Then a story and bed." Eddie rattled off. "I'm kind of tired so maybe no story tonight," Christopher yawned. "Thanks for coming over to help with my homework." Buck smiles from the doorway. "I'll leave you two then. Goodnight, Christopher." "Goodnight, Buck," Eddie and Christopher say in unison, making each other laugh. Buck smiles at them and skips to the living room where he left his jacket. He trots to the door and then looks down the hallway. Part of him wanted to stay, but he didn't want to overstep so he takes his leave. As he climbed into his jeep and started it, Buck suddenly couldn't get one thought out of his mind, what if Eddie called that teacher, Ana Flores? What if tomorrow or the next day, he calls her instead? __

It's just Ana offers to come over and help Christopher with his homework. And I kept thinking we're really making this math equation truly difficult because NO MATTER how INCAPABLE they are at math, there's someone already AT HOME that could help Eddie with his son's homework. So they had one good date and then the second date was, "Oh wait I could use her "apparent" math skills to help my son with his homework. Don't forget to set the alarm to be back in time for bed. Oh shit there's construction, I'm going to be late. Wonder if Buck got him to bed? Christopher is probably being stubborn since I'm late." Then of course by bringing her over before Christopher gets to see Tia or Abuela or even Carla seems strange. What's going on? Especially when everything seems fine without forcing Ana into the equation. Can you force equations? Manipulate maybe, more like a chemical/science equation [exactly how Eddie is doing it by forcing himself into this role]? I don't know. Equations do take work. Like the fact that Buck has stayed over BEFORE either to watch Christopher and tell stories and/or stayed long enough after a game night to see Christopher off to sleep and that night he decided to tell a cautionary tale- in which Eddie was apprehensive, but it's Buck telling it and Eddie's there too, Chris would feel safe- until that night Christopher couldn't get to sleep for the next hour.

Equations are long, complicated work and one has already been laid out between Buck and Eddie.

The rest (as we've already agreed) is up to the universe.

#buddie #this is some crack shit again #but still #if it's as easy as 2+2=4 #then what's the endgame?#future tense #evan buckley #eddie diaz #christopher diaz #the universe laid it out they just need to see the answer #they need more work if we're on that slow burn path

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sinful-imagines · 5 years ago

Note

"Aw, You're blushing like a Rose." To Narancia Pt 5

That’s my favorite prompt from the list with my favorite character so thank you so much for the request! Also I got kinda carried away and made this one longer than the others so I hope you enjoy it!

Tutoring- Narancia

You were sitting on your bed and listening to music when you started to hear screaming. You removed your earbuds and started to listen to the conversation. It was definitely Fugo screaming at Narancia for getting his math wrong again, no doubt about that. You were about to run out of your room to try and resolve the situation before Narancia came running into your room. “(Name), Fugo yelled at me again!” He whined as he plopped down onto your bed. Luckily there didn’t seem to be any blood or injuries on his face, but you were still mad that Fugo continuously yelled at your boyfriend. “It’s so stupid, why do I even have to learn this? And he’s making me do more of it later!”

“Yeah, he’s a prick sometimes. Maybe I could try teaching you today to see if you’ll learn better with someone who’s not screaming at you constantly?” You’d been wanting to try and teach Narancia for a while because you believed that the only reason he was having difficulties was because of the hostile environment he was always in. Narancia seemed to cheer up immediately at the idea, his eyes lighting up with excitement.

“That’s a great idea! You’ll be a much better teacher!” He already had a massive grin plastered across his face from the idea of you teaching him alone. You knew it was going to be hard to not just lie to Fugo and pretend you taught him his math, so you decided to put a rule in place.

“Alright then. And you need a motivation so..’ you thought for a minute before continuing, “You can kiss me for every problem you get right, but only then. No touching me either.” Narancia’s expression quickly turned into one of protest, but he decided not to complain too much because it was still better than being stabbed every time he got a question wrong. Or at least that’s what he thought. “Now what were you learning with Fugo earlier?”

“It’s some stupid long division stuff, I don’t really get it,” he mumbled, already realizing that this was probably not going to go well.

“It’s not that hard, I’m sure you’ll get it. Anyways, here you go.” You handed him a notebook and pencil you had laying around and wrote down ‘66÷2.’ He scrambled to do it as quickly as possible and was feeling confident in his awnser.

“It’s 33 right?” He asked excitedly as he put the pencil down.

“Mhm, good job!” You smiled and gave him a quick kiss on the lips, which Narancia tried to keep going for as long as possible. Afterwards you took the notebook back and wrote down another problem, ‘112 ÷ 7.’ To your surprise, Narancia’s confident expression didn’t change at all and he seemed to finish quite quickly. You excitedly looked over his awnser as you held back a laugh.

‘105’

“So, did I get it right?” He asked confidently as he leaned towards you to give you a kiss. You reluctantly pulled back to keep your word.

“Sorry, no. Could you tell me what you did to get 105?”

“What? I was sure I got it right! But I tried so let me kiss you.” He climbed on your lap like a cat and attempted to pull you into a kiss. It was hard to resist, but you needed to keep your promise to yourself.

“No, you only get a kiss when you get it right. Now the quicker we figure out what you did wrong the quicker you can kiss me, alright?” That caused Narancia to frown and look up at you with puppy dog eyes that were almost impossible to ignore.

“B-but that’s not fair! At least let me touch you!” He whined as he wrapped his arms around your neck. You saw a light blush start to grow on Narancia’s face, and you could only hope it would grow from there.

“I’m sorry baby but a promise is a promise,” you said, chuckling lightly at the desperation coming from your boyfriend. You scooted away as quickly as possible and picked up the notebook. “Ohh, you subtracted instead of dividing! That’s a simple mistake, you should be able to fix it in no time.” For once Narancia didn’t protest and grabbed the notebook from you as quickly as possible. In his haste to be able to kiss you again, he forgot how to properly divide and did it wrong. He shoved the notebook in your face quickly and tried to pull you into a kiss once again. “Narancia, that’s not right either. And stop trying to kiss me, you’re not allowed to unless you get it correct remember?”

“That’s not fair! Why can’t we just tell him that you taught me how to do this? Why do you have to torture me like this?” Narancia complained and buried his face into your neck. At first you thought it was because he was desperate to touch you (which he was) but on closer inspection he seemed to be red. You moved his face out of your neck and couldn’t help but laugh at what you saw.

“Aww, you’re blushing like a rose! Are you really that desperate for me that you can’t wait 2 minutes for you to finish the problem?” You teased as Narancia somehow got even redder.

“S-Shut up! This is worse than Fugo teaching me!” He mumbled as he attempted to kiss you one last time. The boy was determined, you’ll give him that.

“So you’d rather be berated, screamed at and stabbed with a fork then not be able to touch me for two minutes?”

“Well..y-yeah..” he mumbled in defeat as he took the notebook back into his hands to try and solve the problem one more time. He put all of his focus on solving the problem (which wasn’t easy to do because his face was burning up) and even double checked his work. “Here’s your stupid problem.”

“Good job, that’s rig-” was all you could get out before Narancia tackled you onto the bed and started to kiss you all over.

You didn’t get far with tutoring that day.

#jjba x reader #narancia x reader #narancia #safe #scenario

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theastrophilearchitect · 4 years ago

Text

I started writing a book.

And I’m mad about it, because I just started this post, brought up a new tab and lost it because I didn’t save my draft.

Anyway. That’s a thing I did. Wow.

As of this moment, this post won’t be going up until April 19th, but I’m starting writing this at 10.30pm on Sunday, February 21st, 2021. I’ve done a lot in the last couple weeks, and I want to have some record of all I’ve accomplished without just letting most of it fade over the next two months.

I’ve always wanted to be an author. From when I was reading under my covers with a torch past bedtime, through the years I wanted to be an artist, through the years I wanted to be a lawyer. It’s always been there - no matter what primary career path I went down, I wanted to be an author. The last few years, I’ve been invested in becoming a biologist, and that dream really took a backseat.

In the start of this lockdown, my mental health went downhill, and some advice my therapist gave me was just to prioritise myself. It sounds simple enough, but, even in my free time, I’d been focusing on schoolwork - revising constantly for exams I’m still not sure are actually happening. (Boris Johnson is apparently making an announcement tomorrow about beginning to ease lockdown, but we’ll see) So, on Saturday, February 6th, I started an attempt to coalesce the ideas I had floating in my head into something tangible.

I’ve tried to write books countless times (not technically countless - I have all the documents on my laptop, so I could if I wanted to), but mostly, I’ve never gotten further than a couple bare plot points and some characters, maybe some ideas for subplots, before I’ve stagnated and given up.

Three times, I’ve finished a skeletal outline. Twice, I’ve started to go back over those outlines only to realise they made no sense or just seemed week, and simply not cared enough to fix it. Until now, I guess.

February 6th, 7th, and fast-forward to my week off beginning the 15th, up until the 19th, I kept developing this concept I’d managed to form, but I was struggling to establish a coherent plot. I had up until and including a midpoint (which was later condensed into just a first act), but everything after that was just a void. I began searching for some skeletal structure I could apply to it, both to work on pacing and fill in the blanks. I tried several, and got a little further, but was about to give up hope.

Then I remembered a video by Katytastic I’d watched years ago about the 3-act, 9-block, 27-chapter structure she used, and couldn’t see the harm in giving it a go. And something clicked.

You can find the video here - the structure’s detailed and easy to follow, plus she even gives an example of using it to generate a plot.

I started binge-watching her writing vlogs in the background, and even started using her same writing program, Scrivener, which just made every a thousand times easier by taking away the need to juggle a billion Word documents. It’s fairly pricey, but I’m currently using the 30-day free trial - it’s 30 days of use, not of ownership, too: if you use it every day, it lasts 30 days, but if you use it once a week, it lasts 30 weeks.

Where Kat used the 27 parts the structure broke down into as chapters, I chose to refer to them as beats, and separate chapters later.

On Saturday the 20th, I finished defining my scenes and started writing an actual draft. I wrote two scenes, putting me at a collective word count (not including notes, synopses, etc.) of 2,580 words.

This morning, Sunday the 21st, I started over. I hated my opening. I’m not going to go through the mess of today’s process, but I currently have around 80 one-line-outline scenes, split into 3 acts. I wrote a draft of my prologue and detailed-outlined (which I’m mentally referring to as zero-outlining because it’s similar to how Katytastic does what she calls a zero draft, but is very much outlining, not a draft) two and a half other chapters. Scriver also tells me how many words I wrote in total, across notes, character profiles, location lists, a document I’ve named ‘Train of Thought’ for my ramblings as I go etc.

Today, I wrote a grand total of 4,141 words, which, rather counterintuitively, puts me at a draft total of 2,598. That makes sense. Anyway.

There are a lot of unknowns in the world right now, and I have no idea how much time I’ll have in the next six months to invest in this project, but I’d like, at bare minimum, to have one complete draft by the start of the next school year in September, which gives me just over 6 months. Which is probably too much time to actually motivate myself, but that’s not the point.

A manuscript needs to have a minimum word count of 50K words to be considered a novel, so, even though my ultimate goal for this project is around 80K words, 50K is going to be my goal for this draft.

I’m being optimistic about sticking with this.

Tuesday 23/02/2021 - Word Count: 3,099 I wrote nothing yesterday; planning to focus writing solely on days off rather than work days, but last night, watching through the incredibly long queue of Alexa Donne writing videos, I came to the conclusion writing every day, even just a little, would be the best way to ensure I keep working on this, so I set myself a goal of just 500 words a day.

Wednesday 24/02/2021 - Word Count: 5,350 After doing a little bit of maths as to how long this outlining and draft would take me if I were to only write 500 words a day, I decided to boost that goal to 1,000. I got started around 1pm today, online school draining me so much I couldn’t face another two hours. I worked on and off until 6pm, and around 4.45pm, I finished outlining Act One!

Thursday 25/02/2021 - Word Count: 7,022 I continued my scene outlining into Act Two, but I hit a brick wall around the midpoint. I have to write chronologically - some people jump around, but I have to write linearly, or it feels like I’m trying to make something in a void. It just doesn’t work. I didn’t know how to get from one scene to the next - there were so many things I needed to establish to get there, but I didn’t want to backtrack. I decided to re-jig the whole thing, but, after dinner, I realised I didn’t have to, and instead, decided to just start a draft, conscious of the things I need to establish as I go.

Friday 26/02/2021 - Word Count: 8,208 Starting draft one, I rewrote the prologue I’d already written, technically putting me to my second draft of it, because I’d been thinking about it for days and just wanted to revisit it, and it was so much better. Then I moved on to chapter one, but decided I wanted to re-jig my chapters. While outlining, I’d split the whole book into only about twenty chapters, but decided to go for shorter ones for more effective divisions of the story. I got most of the way through the first scene of chapter one, but basically ran out of both time and motivation, since I hadn’t heavily outlined that scene. in total, I wrote over 2000 words today, but because I only increased the prologue word count by about 100 words, it didn’t do that much to the total count.

Saturday 27/02/2021 - Word Count: 11,050 I got some chores done Saturday morning and focused on finishing my book so I could include it in my February wrap-up, but I still had time to get some writing done around mid-day. My goal was just to hit 10K this weekend, but I though I could do it in one day. I wrote about 1,000 words before feeling a little word-drained, but took a break for lunch, got back to it and wrote 2,400 words. Though that only added a little over 2,000 to the word count, it took me to 10K! I’m 20% of the way to being able to call it a novel! We’re in quintuple digits!

And then eight hours later, I wrote another thousand words and got to 11K.

Sunday 28/02/2021 - Word Count: 13,722 I spent most of my Sunday morning writing, though it took me more than two hours to write about 1500 words, though it only added about 1100 to my count. I decided to set myself an overall and weekly deadlines to hold myself accountable. Due to the fact I don’t yet have a clue how many words this will work out as, I decided I wanted to have either a complete first draft or 100K words (which I doubt I’ll reach, but it seems like a good way to make myself finish the draft before my deadline) by the end of April. Which works out to a little under 1500 words a day, or just under 11K a week, which is perfectly doable. Bearing in mind my current word count is including outlines, but I still believe in myself.

I wrote another 1600 words later, which took me to 14K, until I deleted the 300 word outline I wrote for one scene, but I worked out my words per day for the next two months with the assumption of a 10K word count as of March 1st and a target of either a complete draft or 100K words by the end of April, so I’m nearly 4,000 words ahead of schedule. Which gives me 6,606 words to write this week, instead of 10,328. (If you couldn’t tell, I like numbers. They just make sense to me.

Monday 01/03/2021 - Word Count: 15,005 I didn’t quite hit my daily goal, but I was completely leached of motivation today, I’m ahead of schedule anyway and I was only under by less than 200 words. It’s alright. But, hey, we hit 15K! Two days after hitting 10K!

Tuesday 02/03/2021 - Word Count: 21,119 This was an insane writing day. My end-of-day target was only 16,480, and that was still ahead of schedule - if I was sticking to the 100K by April 30th, I’d only actually need to be at 12,950 today. This was the best writing day I’ve ever had. I wrote before school and during breaks, which kept both my writing and working momentum up.

I didn’t read a page of my current read, but I wrote a total of 7,681 words and increased my wordcount by 6,114 words, or literally an additional 40.75%. I hit 20K three days after hitting 10K, and am 42.238% of the way to being able to say I wrote a novel, be it a shitty first draft that won’t be complete at 50K words.

I also finished chapter three, which I’ve been working on for three days and came out ~5,000 words, and wrote chapters four and five in their entirety.

Note to self: this is day 10 of vaguely outline-drafting this project.

Wednesday 03/03/2021 - Word Count: 23,364 I've only written 490 words today, as of writing this update, but I just wanted to make note of the fact I've done some calculations, and can reasonably finish my draft this month. I'm still not completely sure how long it'll work out to be, so I can't quite work out my daily words to finish on the 31st, but if I stick to my current 1,475 words a day, I'll hit 63,894 words by the end of the month, which is a little less than I imagine this draft will be, but if I stick to that as a minimum, my first draft won't have to go into April.

I'd like to post this later this week, but I already have a post for this Friday, so God only knows how long this will be by the time it goes up. So far, I've written 1,900 words today, and I don't think I'm out of fuel yet, but I'm stopping because I need to read today, and I'd rather not burn out. I'm over my goal, anyway.

Oh, also, I'm nearly at 25K, which is halfway to a novel, but I haven't broken into Act Two yet, which means this book will be 75K minimum. I'm going to do some maths and work out how many words a day to hit 80K by March 31st. 2,030. That's doable. So I haven't read, but back to writing for like ten minutes.

I've now hit an additional 2,245 words for the day, though I wrote a total of 2,663

Thursday 04/03/2021 - Word Count: 25,415 I've decided to work out how many words I need to write each day to hit 80K by March 31st, and watch the fluctuations. (I like statistics). It should steadily go down throughout the month if I surpass it each day. Today's minimum word count is 2,023, already seven words less than yesterday's. How exciting.

The last scene of Act One was very heavy on world-building I haven't yet figured out, so I stuck what was meant to happen in brackets and just moved on, meaning I have now broken into Act Two!

I think, during the week, I'm going to focus on just meeting my minimum word count rather than exceeding it, just to save fuel for the weekends, when I can write so many more words.

And, we hit 25K! I'm halfway to a novel!

Friday 05/03/2021 - Word Count: 26,693 In complete honesty, I'm beginning to lose momentum. Maybe it's just today, but I don't really want to write and feel like I need a break, but I'm going to make myself write anyway. I'm going to make myself keep writing until this draft is done, however shitty it may end up. I really hate first drafts.

When you say 2,000 words is only 7-8 pages, it doesn't sound like that much to write per day but my god. Luckily, most of the stuff I've had to save to a Pinterest board called 'Writing Motivation' says if you write when you don't want to, it should pass instead of worsening. I wanted to hit 35K this weekend, but I'm not sure I'll have the momentum. I'll at least hit 31,270, though, which is my minimum goal for this week. I'm still over 700 words off my goal for today, but I'm taking a break because my head is foggy and there's still eight hours left in the day. Besides, 700 after dinner is easy. She says, realising she's probably jinxing it. Oh, well. 80K by March 31st would be difficult, even if I weren't going back to school soon, but that's a stretch goal. 100K by April 31st is my minimum, and I'm 9,000 ahead of where I need to be for that.

I think I’m stagnating because I’ve hit the ‘Fun and Games’ section, which I find really boring. I’m going to try to keep going with it, but I may just skip it and come back later.

Saturday 06/03/2021 - Word Count: 28,150 So, I did not get the extra 700 words in. Before dinner, some stuff I had to deal with came up, and by the time it was done, I just wanted to go to bed, so I did. Today, I'm going to try to make up for it, which I think is reasonable because it is now the weekend. I'm still kinda exhausted this morning, but I'm going to do my best, and my wrist hurts, but I'm not sure why. You'd think it would be from all the typing, but only one wrist hurts - you know what? Never mind. They do both hurt. I'm just not sure why, but it doesn't hurt typing this, so that doesn't make any sense. Anyway, to hit my word count for the day, I need to write 2,555 words, which doesn't sound like too much, but it kinda is because I'm primarily writing Act Two at the minute, and for every thousand words I write, I lose like 400 from my outline. You'd think I'd just not include my scene outlines in the word count, but it's too late for that now.

I'm thinking this over, and I really don't think trying to write 80K by the end of the month is going to be good for either my motivation, mental health, or ability to function back at school, so I'm going to stick to 100K or a finished draft by April 30th, and re-work out my goals from there, based on yesterday's word count, so I'm not making myself do catch-up today.

So, to hit 100K by April 30th, I only need to write 1,309 words each day (which will decrease over time because if that's my minimum now, I'll probably surpass it, decreasing the amount of words left etc.). That's so much less pressure.

God, I really don't want to write today. I just want to watch YouTube and Netflix and read.

Okay, so here's the thing. I've been working on this story straight for three weeks and I'm kinda exhausted of it. I'm not done with it, not at all, and I want to keep working on it because it exists, which makes it workable.

I watched a writing vlog by ShaelinWrites yesterday, and she said she writes different projects at once, alternating in week- or multi-week-long blocks. I think I might try that.

My plan with this post and the following updates was to keep updating it until the day it goes up, the day after which is when I begin drafting the next, but, since I may be switching projects for a while and this is really about the project I've decided to dub 'Bay Tree' (which is just, I guess, a pseudonym for here because while I have no idea what it would eventually be called, I know that's nothing like the title I'd want to give it) so I'd want to start a new post for a new project.

I'm now doing a little outlining instead of actually continuing writing, but I think this will help me, though I'm still not certain about whether or not I'm going to directly continue with this specific project for the minute. Instead of setting daily goals based on a target, I'm also just going to say 1,000 words a day, and see where that takes me.

I've just been outlining into Act Three, and I've met a major plot stumble, but I'm going to work that out and explain what I'm doing in my next writing update.

So, go drink some water, eat if you haven't eaten in the last few hours, stand in front of the mirror and tell yourself how wonderful you are and how much happiness you deserve, and, if you want to write a book, stop thinking about it, and go write.

#blog #blogging #blogger #blogpost #blog post #writing #books #book #reading #read #write #writer #author #draft #first draft #story #writing blog #writerblr #bookblr #novel #debut

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peanut-in-the-goal · 4 years ago

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fair warning, I wrote this for school. Cw: gangs, violence, death

Carina lived near a beach. The salty breeze would push through her windows and into the house. She woke up in the morning to see the sun rising over the horizon. The colors would dance on the water, and the peaceful crashes of waves would be soothing. She’s always like the beach. At night, after everyone was asleep, she’d climb out her window. There was a tree planted just outside, the jump to the branch was easy.

The tree held the treehouse that she and Castor helped build. Years ago, when their dad was around more and not just some “ghost” who lived with them, he loved to build things. The math it involved and the different angles. Gears would turn in his head as he figured it out. He loved the thought of all the things he could make, it was limitless as long as he had the motivation.

The treehouse was still standing. Carina barely went in there anymore. It was full of memories, toys from her and Castor’s games were left, long abandoned as they grew up. The paper hats from when they pretended to be sailors, the toy swords made of cardboard from when they were pirates looking for the buried treasure. The old towels repurposed as capes for when they were flying around, saving the world.

They always dreamed of saving people together. They’d find someone who was in need of a hero and they’d be there. Not a superhero from a comic story though, those were too flashy and seemed to only use their powers for fame rather than focusing on the people screaming for help. Real heroes don’t care about who see them, they care about saving lives and sparing families.

It was crazy to think that was only a few years ago. Everything had been so simple then. Family meant everything, Castor was her best friend, dinner that night would be something like Mac and Cheese. Their favorite when they were kids.

But they aren’t kids now, are they? She’s seventeen, has a job working as the cashier at McDonald’s, and she’ll be off to college in a year. Carina hasn’t even applied anywhere yet, despite everyone pressuring her too.

So she climbs a tree, using the old wooden steps that were nailed there what feels like an eternity ago. Her feet hit the dirt, and the wind blows through her hair. She loves it. The town is empty at this time of night.

The street lights are dying out, flickering on and off as she walks by. It’s cold out, but she’s wearing not shoes. She leaves her jacket unzipped when she runs down the street and to the beach.

The sand is calming beneath her feet. It’s cold but not freezing, it’s perfect. She stays there., simply sitting in the sand by herself, because sometimes your own company is better than anyone else's.

She stays out there until the moon is gleaming over the ocean in such a comforting manor that her eyes start to droop. Startling herself awake, because she can’t follow asleep and have the police escort her home again, she dips her hands into the water and splashes herself in the face.

She’s hit with more adrenaline, and take off down towards one of the more secluded areas of the beach.

Carina ran through the streets of Godric, the rain was coming down hard on her. She’d be lying if she said she didn’t love it. Her bare feet were slippery on the wet concrete and puddles. Her thin sweater and sweats were drenched, sticking to her skin and making her shiver from the cold.

“If you care too much, you worry too much. Then you’ll never really get to live.” Caelum said that to her one night. The two stayed up late, watching some stupid cartoons on this old tv they had found. It was one of those, “Take it, it’s free,” things where people left their junk on the side of the road.

The TV was obviously years old, no longer in “new” or even good condition, but with a little tinkering and rearranging the wires they got it to work.

The lights from the cars blurred around her and she ran down one block to another. Her heart was pounding and she laughed. It was a small thing, a little manic and mad to anyone who saw her. But it was nice, she hadn’t smiled a lot recently. She was growing up, a teenager now. And apparently, the joy gets sucked out of everything when you’re a teenager.

It was the times like this she loved. The hours of the night where it was just her and her thoughts. Honestly, Carina preferred being alone over hanging out with other people. Sometimes the company was nice, Kai and Matilda were really two of the only people she didn’t mind being around.

Sometimes, when she and Caelum stayed up late at night, they’d talk. With her brother, she could practically say anything. Sometimes she had to worry about what she said, but there was a type of vulnerability that she couldn’t quite place that came in the dead of the night. It was a safe to know that whatever they said wouldn’t be repeated.

Sometimes they wouldn’t talk and just sit there in silence. That was okay. The company is what they’re both looking for, not the words that come with it.

The rain was coming down harder, and she grinned. The night had started out clear, if not a little cloudy. The rain was a nice surprise. It was probably well into the morning, at least 2 or 3 am. It was late, but there was a good chance that Kai was still awake.

Kai lived just on the outskirts of town. She had just moved out of her motor home with her dad. Carina was glad they decided to stay in their small town. It wasn’t much, certainly no amusement parks or that many town festivals, but it was home.

Kai’s house was on the cheaper side, one story, and mysterious stains on the walls. It was homey though, more than Carina’s own house at least. The Robinson’s were more a family to her than hers was anyways.

But that wasn’t surprising. It wouldn’t be hard to be better than her own family, the standards weren’t all that high.

It didn’t take too long to get to her house if you knew the right paths. Carina ran through a path that was in between two separated some bushes. The dirt had turned to mud from the rain, coating her feet. She was careful not to fall and stain her sweater, but the cuffs of her sweats were already covered in the dark, sticky substance.

She didn’t care much, stains give character, they show where you’ve been and how you choose to live your life. Whether that be reckless, careful, or somewhere in between, your clothes tell a story. Whether you want them to or not, they do.

It didn’t take long for Carina to arrive at Kai’s house. The large tree in the front with the eccentric drawings on the window made it noticeable from around the block. Carina quickly climbed on top of the trashcans before jumping and grabbing onto the ledge of Kai’s window. Luckily, she’s learned how to be quiet when she needed to not be noticed.

Perching on the thin window sill, she tapped on the glass impatiently. The light of the room was a soft green behind the curtains, thanks to Kai’s LED lights strung around the room.

After a moment, Carina sees the curtains shift a tiny bit, revealing an all too familiar eye looking at her. She huffed impatiently, poking the glass right over Kai’s eye, to signal “let me in,” because really she was a few seconds away from falling off the slippery window sill.

Kai opened the window, rolling her chair backwards to make room for Carina to climb into the house. She immediately made a puddle on the hardwood floor and smiled apologetically to the redhead.

Kai rolled her eyes fondly before standing up.

“It’s nice to see you, too.”

“The pleasure is mine.” Carina gave Kai a mock bow, but really she only managed to make a bigger mess.

“Hold on, hold on, stay there.” Kai held her hands out towards Carina, as if that made her words easier to understand. Not that they were particularly difficult to understand in the first place. “I’m going to go get you a towel.”

As Kai left the room Carina looked around. She’d been here a 100 times or more already, but she neve did get old of seeing at the polaroid pictures that covered her walls. There were pictures of Kai and herself, mot of them involving something stupid going on. Some were of Kai and her dad, one of Carina’s favorites was where Mr.Robinson has his around her, because he had said, “you’re just as much my daughter as Kai is. You’re over enough to practically live at my house already.”

Carina loved that memory, she felt that she had truly belonged somewhere for the first time since her mom died when she was four.

Kai walks back into the room with a large fluffy, green towel in her hands.

“My favorite! How did you know?” Carina slaps an over the top smile on her face, making it hard for both of them to not start laughing.

“Only because you try to steal it every time you come over.” Kai grinned, then promptly threw the towel at Carina, causing her to stumble into what she now noticed was the still open window.

“Oi! Rude!” Carina complained. “Just for that I’m not closing the window now.”

“Ri.”

“Kai.”

“Close the window.”

“Let me think about it.” Carina hummed for a moment, pretending to scratch her head before looking back at Kai. “Yeah, no, my answer is still no.”

Kai groaned, stalking past Carina to close and lock the window for her.

By the time Carina is dry and in clean clothes, it’s half past 2 am.

“How’d you know I wasn’t asleep?” Kai asked, seeming to finally remember the question she forgot.

“You’re a raging insomniac Kai, it wasn’t hard.” Carina laughed at the affronted look on Kai’s face. “But then again, so am I, so, we can suffer together.”

The two of them traded mindless banter before diving into deeper subjects.

“You know the gangs that have been popping up around town?”

Carina nodded. Of course she knew, everyone knew. It was all over the news, reports of someone gone missing, robberies, deaths. It was hard to escape the threat of violence that ran throughout the city. Her older brother and her dad belonged to one.

There were two major gangs that ruled the city. The Riders and The Silence were enemies, but the two seemed to have a truce going on at the moment. Her family was to join the The Riders, in a year Jack and her would be recruited to join.

“Yeah.” She trailed off. “Yeah I know.”

Kai nodded slowly, “What’s going to happen to us?”

Carina shrugged. “We join one, go off to college, and then when we come back we hope they’re still together.”

“I don’t want to join one though.”

Carina’s head snapped up, her long black hair covering half of her face until she moved it with a flick of her wrist.

“You know we don’t get a choice Kai. This is Godric we’re talking about. If you try to leave, or try to stay neutral they’ll kill you. Anyone unclaimed for is fair game.”

Kai agreed solemnly. “I know… just… I was talking to Willow about this earlier too. I don’t want to hurt anyone, and if I have to join one I think I want to join the The Silence. They’re the least violent in the town.”

Carina felt the breath leave her lungs. If she joined the Silence, then they would have to be enemies. Conversing with the opposite gang was dangerous and against the rules. If you were caught then you were a trader, and would have to work your way to earn your leaders trust back.

Carina exhaled shakingly. “I guess we have to make the most of these last few months then, huh?”

Kai thought for a second. “What if… What if you came with me? What if you joined me and Willow, and we could probably get Matilda to come with us too.”

Carina was shaking her head before Kai even stopped talking.

“We both know I’m joining The Riders. My families there, and I can’t leave them. That would danger all of us.”

Kai looked like a kicked puppy, it made Carina feel slightly bad, but not bad enough to make her want to change her mind.

“Just think about it, yeah?” Kai asked.

“I will.” Carina agreed. She wasn’t going to, she made up her mind years ago.

It wasn’t until her dad brought it up that Carina really thought about it. He told her that he wanted her to join The Silence. It was safer, and wouldn’t push her as hard.

Not many people really knew of her anyways. They knew Caelum and Castor, but at the younger twin she was usually forgot about. Her slipping away to join The Silence wouldn’t be very hard.

She considered it, and she agreed to it. Joining The Silence wouldn’t be the worse thing in the world, and maybe she’d get to keep an eye on her friends.

Carina called Kai after school the next day, letting her know that she was in. The plan was for Carina to move in with Kai the day before her 18th birthday, that way when The Riders came for Castor they wouldn’t find her.

She knows it’s for the safety of all of them and that she has to do this, but it hurts to know that the next time she sees her twin is probably going to be across the way when someone is trying to kill him. They’re going to have to fight each other and that’s a horrifying thought.

Moving into Kai’s house went smoothly. Kai’s dad welcomed her with open arms, getting her settled in the room next to Kai’s. It stops being labeled as the guest room and is now Carina’s room instead.

Waking up in the middle of the night and not hearing the pages in a book turning or seeing the dim lamp that Castor used to read was concerning at first before she remembered where she was.

Carina never thought that she’d miss that house, but now all she wants is to be able to go home. The Robinson’s house isn’t her home. She thought it was but it wasn’t, not when her brothers weren’t there. Not when the smell of oil lamps and cinnamon didn’t fill every room.

The walls in the room are a blank white. There are no pictures hanging on the walls, and no shelves holding her trophies. It’s a change, she can't tell if it’s good or bad but it’s there.

Keeping her family history underwraps is a lot harder than Carina thought it would be. Since she moved to Godric she knew she was going to join The Riders. She memorized their schedule, how they worked, what types of things they pulled.

The Silence was different, and she wasn’t prepared to join them. Gangs were hard, and they were dangerous, but sometimes without a little danger you aren’t gong to make it out alive.

Carina slipped up more, making a reference to the riders every now and then before trying her best to cover it up immediately. She saw the looks that everyone else was giving her. They saw her as a spy, a threat. She was treading on thin ice and if she wasn’t careful then she’d probably sink.

Kai’s the only one who knows who Carina’s family is. Luckily Taylor was a common enough last name that name many people were able to make the connection. Matilda and Willow were both friends with Carina since elementary school, but they never talked about their home lives. Not because they were all bad, but because they wanted to keep their lives separate. It was an unspoken rule amongst everyone in Godric. Everyone’s hiding their demons, you don’t bring up what doesn’t need to be discussed.

There are some people who tryst Carina though, they don’t see her as a spy so much as someone who does their research. After all, from what she’s let slip about the riders wouldn’t be that hard to figure out if you want to know.

Kai, Willow, and Matilda were always together. They vowed to fight with each other and to protect each other, if one was going down then they all were. But Carina strayed a little from her group, meeting Jacob and Lewis.

They were twins, it made her heart ache thinking about how much she missed her twin. Of course she couldn’t say that, settling on asking them what it was like to be a twin instead. They were questions she herself had answered what felt like 100 times over, but she asked anyways.

The three of them formed a close bond, and Carina was starting to choose her own family of those she could trust.

The twins started coming around more, merging into he friend group with Willow and Kai and Matilda. They all got along well, and shared the same views on a lot of things.

She hadn’t meant to let her guard down so easily, she didn’t even realize it was slipping until after she said it.

“Right, me and my brother Castor used to get mistaken for each other all the time. At one point we even got the same haircut just to mess with people.” She laughed. Suddenly the friend group went silent and she saw Kai wince in her peripheral vision.

“I-I mean,” Carina couldn’t think of a lie out of this, but she didn’t get time to think of one anyways.

“You have a brother?” Lewis asked.

“You have a twin?” Jacob asked louder, gaining the attention of some people sitting at some of the surrounding tables in the small cafe they were in.

Kai and Carina hurriedly went to shush them.

“I, uh, I didn’t mean to say that?”

Matilda, Willow, and the twins all had their jaws dropped.

“How did we not know you had a brother? A twin at that?” Willow asked. They looked hurt at the thought of Carina keeping that from them.

“I never talked about him I guess…” Carina trailed off. She wasn’t sure how much she should reveal to them. She could tell them that he was dead, but that would dig her into a bigger web of lies. Or she could tell them about her family, and hopefully they wouldn’t turn on her for having outside connections to other gangs.

The waiter decided that right then was a good time to bring their drinks and food, placing them on the small table in front of them.

The best course in action would be to just come clean, tell them about the burden she’s been carrying and let it all out. But not there in that Cafe, it was too dangerous when anyone could hear her.

“Later.” She said, picking up her tea and swirling the cup in her hands a few times. “I’ll explain everything later.” And that efficiently put and end to their conversation .

Later she did tell them. They met at the twins house, which was an apartment that was near the local college in Godric. She told them about her parents, howo her mom died when she was four and she moved from Italy to America. How she lost her eldest brother a few years after when gangs first started popping up and he father made the wrong people mad. She told them about her father and brothers being in their rival gangs and having to move out the day before her 17th birthday.

Willow looked at her in pity, like she as the victim here. The twins seems to be torn in wanting to see the good in her but seeing the trader there at the same time, she couldn’t blame them. Matilda was calm and stoic as always. She was always hard to read, but it was just now that Carina realized she hadn’t said a thing the whole time. It was concerning, but she just had to hope that they all kept her secrets.

The news came suddenly. Everyone could feel the tension that was swarming the two gangs, increasing until it broke. Everyone was alerted that there was to be a braw at midnight, they’d meet in the back alleys hidden behind a run down soda shoppe.

The rules were no weapons, but there was always someone who didn’t listen. Everyone wouls end up bring something, but you wouldn’t use it until someone else forced you to.

The clock was ticking down, the group that had soon become a family were sitting on the floor in the twin’s apartment. They also had loads of nervous energy built up in them, and by the time the clock hit 11:45 pm they were shrugging on their coats and heading out the door.

They met up with a group of others a little ways away from the alley with 7 minutes to spare. Quickly the group grew and most members showed up.

Blair caught a glance of familiar black hair and red shoes slip around the corner of a building. Looks like her family was here.

It all happened in a blur. One moment everyone was yelling and running towards the old alley way. The shouts echoed off the walls and amplified it enough to make her dizzy. The next thing she knew someone was coming after her, knife raised in the air and ready to strike. She ducked, going in to defend herself but the other person was too fast, already changing directions and then she was trapped. She was pinned against the wall, crowded from each side so there was no escape.

She was singled out, and probably wouldn’t make it out of there. She wasn’t going to. That is, until her brothers eyes locked with hers, and then he was pulling the man off of her and he was attacked instead.

Traitor, they thought he was a traitor. And Carina barely caught him before he fell to the ground. His clothes were staining red, which contrasted against his pale skin.

Carina cried.

She cried because how could people be so- so ruthless? How can the kill, and kill, and kill, but they never showed remorse. They didn’t care. They did it for the money, the accomplishment, the fame.That did it so they could say that they- they were the one that made the light leave that kid’s eyes.

Because that’s what they are. They’re kids fighting a losing battle, trying to stay afloat but everyone just takes and takes and takes, drowning them in violence and hostility that they might not get back up from.

It’s always a gamble getting up after you’ve fallen. They don’t know if they’re going to make it, or if it was even worth it in the end afterwards.

The world is crumbling around them and no one is doing anything to save it. It’s sick. People are flying, gangs are forming and growing, and soon they’re all going to go after each other. There’s going to be a lot of bloodshed until only on gang is left standing.

And for what? To show dominance, to say that you’re better then everyone else? The world isn’t going to stop spinning on its axis while everyone stands around and tears each other apart. By the time someone comes out victorious, it’ll be too late. There’s no coming back from that. There’s no revival when you’ve already let something important die.

She tried to hold onto to what she had left of her brother, but his eyes had already slipped shut and his breathing was shallow. Kai had crossed over to her at one point, and together they carried him out of the danger area.

Hospitals wouldn’t treat gang related injuries, they already knew that. But even if they did they doubted that they could save them.

That night is filled with tears, blood, and anger. She doesn’t remember what happened after that, she doesn’t know how she got back into Kai’s house or falling asleep. She does remember the dreams though. The bravery written over Castor’s face. He wasn’t scared to die, not if it was for family.

She should have saved him, should’ve been strong enough. She promised herself that no one else was going to die for her.

The world moves on, whether your ready or not. At least that’s what she tells herself. She was supposed to start college soon, moving into the dorms was supposed happen in a week. She’s packed, and is ready to leave Godric.

Kai is going to local college here in town, but Carina wanted to leave. She wanted to get in the car and drive. But she wouldn’t leave Kai here without looking back, so she chose a college a couple states away but within driving distance.

That way she could still come back afterwards for Kai.

Leaving for college was hard. Her dad wasn’t there to see her off, and Castor wasn’t coming with her. Rigel wasn’t there to make them ramen at 12 am and Kai was staying here. Kai was there for everything in her life, having been best friends since kindergarten.

Mr. Robinson drove her to college, and helped her carry things into her dorm. After everything was in place she made sure to thank him for being more of a dad to her then her own was.

College was stressful and there was a lot of pressure she put only herself to be perfect. In Godric she learned how to handle stress. Sometimes that involved shutting down and getting her work down by going through the motions. Another thing she worked on was managing her time.

Although after Castors death she wanted his memory to live on. She picked up some of his hobbies. Reading books, memorizing quotes, he always wanted to be one of the top students in every school he went to.

It was a few weeks after school started, she got a call from her dad. She wasn’t aware he still had her number but then again there was no reason that he wouldn’t.

He informed her of Castor’s funeral date, the gangs agreed she was allowed to come, anyone who knew him was allowed to attend. Carina broke down again that day.

The day before the funeral she drove back to Godric. She spent that night at Kai’s house, where the three of them—Carina, Kai, and Mr.Robinson—would leave together to go to the funeral. Seeing her brother in the open casket was heart wrenching. He died for her and she could have prevented that.

It was her brother who took her place, and she knew it was her fault. No one was going to die for her, she’d give up her own life first.

Four years passed quickly. Most of them were full of studying and classes, every now and then the friend group would meet up, coming from their different colleges and states to get a cup of coffee or do something dumb. Occasionally Carina came home to join in the rumbles and brawls between gangs.

She grew to love the adrenaline that came with it. The thought of hurting someone else didn’t register much anymore as long as it never went too far.

Coming back after she graduated college was something she never thought that she would do. She always assumed that after college that was it, she was free. But without Kai and Willow and Matilda, she would never truly be free.

So she rented a car, and drove from her new apartment back to Godric for the final time. The three of her friends were waiting at the Robinson’s house. They had all moved in there after the death Mr. Robinson. He was battling cancer these past few years, and after holding out for a long time he lost. The big house was lonely without other occupants so Willow and Matilda offered to move in.

They left Carina’s room alone while she was gone, because even if she wasn’t living there that was still her room. She was still welcome back anytime.

Carina rolled up to the house, taking a good look at it. She pulled her keys from her bag, unlocking the door. She wanted to see the house one last time.

Matilda, Willow, and Kai were sitting around the table, eating oatmeal and scrolling through their phones.

“Ready?” She asked. Kai looked up, smiling.

“Let’s get out of here.”

The four of them drove off and away from the violent town. They were finally free and didn’t have to peer around every corner every time they went somewhere. And if Carina stopped and dropped a letter off a her father’s house then no one had to know.

#gangs #cw gangs #violence #cw violence #death #cw death #character death #cw character death #Carina Taylor #Castor Taylor #Caelum Taylor #Kai Robinson #Mr. Robinson #Willow Risten #Matilda Flynn #My Oc's #My Ocs

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spindaonateaspoon · 5 years ago

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Yo there! Oh all those spindas in the background are making me dizzy haha (one of my fave pokemon actually, love them). Okay, sooo that's pretty random ask but what are your top ten black clover characters? :D

Ah, a tumblr user of taste, I see. Glad you could get past the vertigo to send me an ask, I really appreciate it! Next time you can save your eyes a little stress and ask my interest blog @thespiralgrimoire instead!

Top 10 Favorite Black Clover Characters

1. Nozel Silva

There are a lot of reasons I absolutely adore this unhinged bedazzled train wreck of a man. I thought my love for him couldn’t swell any bigger when I watched the anime, and then I started reading the manga, and he only gets better.

First and foremost, he’s pretty. In an extremely conventional way, but hey, it’s conventional for a reason. Even with his stupid hair, he’s just nice to look at. This is despite the fact that he literally never smiles, which is usually an important feature to appearances to me. But coming back to the braid thing, he KNOWS it’s stupid, and you know he knows it’s stupid, because he literally threatens the lives of people who criticize it. The boy made a bad aesthetic decision once when he was like 19 and said, “Oh shit. If I don’t own this, I will never live this down. It’s time to do or die.” And he owned it. He is doomed to look this stupid for the rest of his life or face an endless assault of naysayers. His pride will not allow it.

Which brings me to the next thing I love about him: He’s such an arrogant twat. Everything about Nozel screams “I’m better than you, and if you disagree with me, I will throw myself on the floor and cry.” He will not allow anyone to even entertain the idea that he’s not perfect. Even himself. Even when it’s glaringly obvious that he’s a hot mess. During the star festival, when he hears that the black bulls came in second, He Mcfreakin loses it. He gets so mad that when he can’t make Yami feel ashamed for being himself, he literally STOMPS OUT OF THE FESTIVAL. It’s chapter 104. Look it up. I’m not exaggerating.

Finally, I’m a slut for siblings, and the Silva Squad is an endless goldmine. That dynamic is what gets me through the day. I could live off sibling dynamics. Nebra and Solid worship the ground he walks on, and Noelle can’t help but look up to him, even if he’s been a huge douchenozzel to her her entire life. At this point it’s all conjecture for how that relationship will develop, but got damn, I’m in this for the long hall.

2. Fuegoleon Vermillion

Again, this man is so pretty. They really got their royal aesthetics right in this show. I am a simple person, with simple desires, and pretty men that I can make fun of is about all I need to be happy.

That being said, Fuegoleon is a nice guy. Despite having every reason to have the Higher Than Thou attitude that Nozel has, he’s respectful of everyone. This, charmingly, extends to how he treats people for better or worse. My home boy ain’t walking around pretending everyone is deserving of hand holding and forgiveness. He’s beating everyone over the head when they do something stupid. NO ONE is immune to a Teachable Moment.

Which is probably the funniest thing about him. This man is incapable of not teaching. The entire city is being overrun by zombies and he stops in the middle of defending citizens to give Noelle a pep talk and magic lesson??? Bro. Time and place, my dude. I love you.

Actually the funniest thing about him is that despite obviously being the most reserved of the Vermillions, this guy has no chill. If he’s not screaming passionately about something that someone needs to learn, he’s squaring up. He has no off switch. Sure, he’s not running around with his fists up like Meoroleona and Leopold, but if you think he’s going to be any slower to throw a punch than they are then you and I are watching different anime. He may canonically be the most intelligent of the captains, but that doesn’t mean that he’s not a meathead. And I think that’s beautiful.

Okay the ranks get harder after this because these two are so easily my favorite LOL

3. Meoroleona Vermillion

I could say a lot of things about Meoroleona, but to save some space, I’m going to refer you to #2, and also show you my favorite character from Steven Universe. You do the math.

4. and 5. Nebra and Solid Silva

These two are such bitches. At this point in the series, they only exist to a) be Nozel’s hype men and b) be the bane of Noelle’s existence, and as a writer, I respect that. There’s not a lot to them in canon, but that hasn’t stopped me from designing their entire lives and backstory. I love them so much; not only for what I’ve made them out to be, but for where they could go as characters. We’ve already seen this a little bit with their asses being handed to them in fights, and I just hope that their asses continue to get handed to them until they come around to have some respect for anyone but each other and themselves. In the meantime I’ll continue developing their personalities on an interpersonal level.

Okay I’m not done. The REAL reason these guys made 4th and 5th is because, like I mentioned before, I am a slut for sibling relationships. Black Clover does them s o well. Even with the little we’ve seen, it’s so easy to tell that their love for Nozel and each other is so deep and sincere... even if it might be just a tad bit dysfunctional. There’s so much ground to cover with how the death of their mother affected them and pushed them closer together. But I can’t imagine that they wouldn’t have been super close had she stayed alive. You can just tell in everything they do that they live for each other. They’re EVERYTHING to each other. You get the impression that these two probably don’t really know how to be people separate from their siblings, because all they’ve ever had is each other. It’s such a great dynamic to grow and explore and if we don’t get more Silva interaction in the future I’m gonna throw a fit.

6. Ladros

Okay this is the point where this list starts getting a little wonky because I like almost everyone else in the series just about the same but---

I have feelings about Ladros Ladros. I don’t even know what it is about him. His design is impeccable. Every time I see him I want to scream. What emotion does he instill in me? Love? Hate? Lust? Disgust? I really don’t know. I just know that there’s a lot of it. Look at his little black eyes. Look at his smile. His hair. His barrel chest that doesn’t fit his twink face. What a man. I sure do feel about him.

Also, he’s my preferred brand of Little Shit.

7. Zora Ideale

Everything that applies to Ladros applies to Zora in exactly the same way. Priddy and meen. At least his face fits his body.

8. Finral Roulacase

He’s such a sweetheart, and I like his new haircut. I wish he was real so he could be my friend. And I cannot stress this enough: I feel that way about NO ONE else on this list. The rest of these assholes are better off fictional, but the world needs more Finrals.

9. Henry Legolant

Unlike every other character on this list, I actually don’t think that Henry’s design is all that pretty. What I love about Henry is that his whole personality is “My fragile heart is overflowing with love and care for all my friends... and if you so much as think about hurting them, I will pound your bones to dust.” And he follows through. King.

10. Dorothy Unsworth

There is no way that glitzy baby doll Dorothy wasn’t going to end up on this list BEFORE I found out that she and Nozel have feelings jams in Glamor World. Once we see more of her I’m sure she’ll fly up the list.

So, there you go! Thank you so much for the ask! This was really a struggle to put together after #5, but I had a great time doing it.

#spinda tea #black clover #reblogged to thespiralgrimoire #if you want to see my mumbling in the tags read it there

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ofnifflersandkings · 6 years ago

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Title: Roses are Red

Character: Miles Morales

A/n: Happy belated Valentine’s day from your favorite spiderboi

•

You looked down at your desk with a look of pure anguish on your face. In a fit of rage, you tossed you pencil off to the side and sat back to look at your work with a huff.

To put it nicely, it looked horrible.

You picked up the sketchbook you bought from the art supply store on the way home. You held it an arm’s length away from your face, seeing if maybe some distance would increase the quality.

When that proved useless, it took all of your will power to not shove open your window and throw the whole thing out of it.

You pressed your back against your chair, catching a glance at the evergrowing pile of crumpled attempts sitting in your wastebasket. And you could’ve cried right there.

Tomorrow was Valentines Day, and hear you sat trying desperately to make a decent picture for Miles.

The two of you weren’t necessarily dating. It was more of a let’s very clearly have a thing for one another but ignore our emotions till we die sort of situation.

You didn’t expect Miles to do anything in return, but you thought it would be nice to draw him something special as a token of your affection.

Only the problem was that you weren’t anywhere near as good of an artist as he was. Everything you put on the paper just seemed so ugly and nothing looked good enough.

As time crept mercilessly onwards, your frustration only grew. You could feel your anxiety settle in at the base of your stomach and you contemplated forgetting about the whole thing.

What if he took one look at your pathetic drawing and laughed?

The rational part of your brain told you that you knew he’d never be so cruel, especially not to you. But the doubt in the back of your mind was coming in and making itself comfortable.

It certainly wasn’t for a lack of trying. This had been the second sketchbook you’d purchased to try and create him something that was good enough for him.

But you were really falling flat.

You looked over at a framed photograph of the two of you, the happy expression on both of your faces made you smile.

Miles was just so sweet, and you liked him more than you probably should’ve. Heaven knows if you didn’t, you wouldn’t be stressing about a simple present as much as you were.

You closed your eyes and took a deep inhale to calm yourself down. Maybe you were just thinking too hard about this, so you decided to approach this from a different angle.

•

“You don’t think she’s mad at me do you?” Miles asked, staring up at his phone screen.

He had tried messaging you a couple of times since classes ended that day. This had been the fourth day in a row that you had skipped hanging out at lunch or during your free time at the end of the day.

Any time he would ask you to go see a movie with him or hang out on the school grounds and let him show off his new designs, you’d give him a half handed excuse about how you had too much homework to catch up on.

Miles knew you well enough to know that something was up. Sure, you would procrastinate on your work from time to time. But this felt very off, you were usually never this behind.

Yesterday, he even offered to help you finish up your assignments. But you quickly told him you had it under control before you took off without another word.

Truthfully, Miles was beginning to worry. Did you not want to hang out with him anymore?

He looked over at your gift sitting on his nightstand and suddenly felt very self-conscious about giving it to you tomorrow.

This would be his very first Valentine’s Day with someone to show his affection towards. And if he was being 100% honest, he had been very excited to spend the day with you.

But now he was just worried.

“You know (Y/n) better, probably busy with something and can’t get to the phone.” Ganke chimed in, turning away from his monitor to give Miles a reassuring smile.

“Yeah,” Miles said, scrolling back on some previous text messages between you two, trying to see if he had said something to make you upset with him. “I do know better.”

•

You came into school the next morning with a skip in your step and a smile etched onto your face. Somehow, someway, the stars had alligned and you had managed to make a gift you were happy with.

Class Committee had gone into school early that morning and taped flowergrams to people’s lockers. When you got to yours, you were surprised to see a red rose taped onto the door.

You beamed, gently pulling it off and twirling it in your hand. You knew it had been from Miles, he had tried to casually ask you what flowers you liked for no reason in particular.

You placed it in the very top shelf of your locker, setting it right on top of Miles’ present for safe keeping until the end of the day.

The rest of the day passed by as normal, the only difference was that Miles was now the one absent from lunch. He had missed a Physics test from the beginning of the week, so you had no time to explain your sudden disappearances.

“You really threw him for a loop there,” Ganke said, attepting to catch a grape he tossed into the air in his mouth. “I actually felt bad, almost revealed your whole surprise right then and there.”

You looked up from your math homework. “He was worried?”

Ganke nodded. “Miles thought you were mad at him so that’s why you kept bailing on lunch.”

You snorted, “He’s such a dork.”

“A dork you looove.” Ganke cooed, breaking off into a cackle when you chucked one of your own grapes at him.

“Don’t think I forgot about you though,” You said, reaching into your bag and sliding a giant pack of gummy worms over to him.

Ganke gasped dramatically and pulled them to his chest. “You know the way to my heart.”

•

Miles stared at the clock in his final class for the day, it felt like the bell would never ring. Ganke had told him you definitely weren’t mad at him, so now all he wanted to do was see you.

As soon as the bell rang, he was at the door and in a full on sprint to get to your locker before you had a chance with leave without him.

He turned the hallway and saw you just as you pressed your locker door shut. Your bag was already on and he saw the carnation he had gotten for you in your hand.

The sight made him equally relieved and flittery in his stomach. Relieved for fact that you were holding it was solid proof you really weren’t mad at him. And the other because he had never gotten flowers for someone he liked before and the reality of it made his head want to reel.

With this newfound reassurance he bounded up to with a big smile and placed his hands over your eyes to block your vision.

“Guess who?”

He felt you chuckle and it made his smile beam.

You pretended to contemplate it with a few very dramatic hums before a funny idea came into your head. “Is it Spider-Man?”

If a sentence could kill someone, Miles would’ve dropped dead on the floor. He truly couldn’t get his brain to form a sentence but he realized if he didn’t something soon it would make things worse.

Miles faked a laugh and released his hands. “So now we’re playing games? I see how it is.”

You turned around to face him and smiled. “I just wanted to see your reaction. It’s not like you could actually be Spider-Man.”

A thought ran through his mind, ‘This is great, this is your get-out-of-jail free card, take it and run with it,’ but the more prideful side of him couldn’t help but feel slightly offended and curious for your reasoning.

“What makes you think I couldn’t be?” He asked, trying to make it sound as casual as possible.

Your brows furrowed slightly as his sudden question and you laughed. “I don’t know?” You posed as a question more than a statement. “Probably because your Mom would kill you before any supervillian could if she found out.”

Miles couldn’t hide his laugh. “Alright, you got me.”

You looked at him and the nervousness over giving him your gift was starting to settle in again. Should you wait? Should you just get it over with now while there was still time to run?

“I got something for you,” You began, before stumbling over your sentence. “Well not really got, I made it.”

Miles felt his face get all warm. “You made something for me?”

You got flustered and felt to shy too say anything else, so you nodded. You had been holding the sketchbook against your chest, so you held it out to him.

“It isn’t very much, but I tried to make it personal if it couldn’t be good,” You said, undoing the leather strap that held it together.

Miles flipped through the pages. Each page from cover to cover was filled with doodles, some were of the two of you, and others were just funny little comics that you knew would make him laugh.

There was the time when he convinced you take old sheets and cut them up to make ghost costumes you could both wear around. But because Miles never ties his shoes, he tripped in his costume and fell smack on his face.

Normally you would’ve rushed over to help, but seeing this giant blob of white hit the floor with a shrilly cry was too much, and you laughed for about ten minutes instead.

You watched Miles flip through it. Each time he’d laugh or smile, you felt a tiny bit of pressue ease from your shoulders. Maybe you hadn’t done too bad afterall.

When he got to the final page, there was a small message written on it along with a picture of the two of you taped to the inside of the back cover.

For the very best person I know,

It isn’t much but I tried to put in all the thought and love I could muster

Happy Valentine’s Day

Miles just stared at the final page, his fingers running along your handwriting as an almost overwhelming amount of emotion ran through him.

The silence was starting to make your anxiety build up again and you rolled back and forth on your feet. “It’s alright if you don’t like it.”

He looked up at you like you were crazy. “You’re kidding? This is now the most important object I own.” He stated proudly, closing it up and holding it close it him.

You laughed and it made his chest feel light.

“Really though, thank you for making this for me.”

You bashfully shrugged your shoulders. “It’s the least I could do for you.”

“Gonna make my gift look like nothing.” Miles said, taking his bag off of his shoulder so reach inside and pull out a wrapped package.

You looked wide-eyed at it and then looked back at him. “You got me a gift?”

“Well yeah,” He said like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “What kind of valentine would I be if I didn’t. I have a reputation to uphold.”

You smiled and took his gift, slowly peeling off the wrapping paper. It was a painting on an art board of the two of you, ironically of the same photo you had taped to the back of his book.

It was beautiful, his art always was. The colors were super bright and you could help but trace your fingers along the visible brush lines.

“I think we compliment each other well,” Miles teased, looking down at the painting with you. “You know what, that was genius, I should make cards or something.”

You laughed and turned to him, placing your hand on his shoulder and reaching up to place a kiss on his cheek, right near the corner of his lips.

“It’s wonderful, Miles.”

He froze right on the spot, his face felt

so warm he worried he might burst into flames right on the spot. When he felt your lips leave his skin he actually let out a giggle.

Miles immediately cleared his throat to cover this and suavely leaned in close to you, taking your hand in his. “Let’s see if we can catch that movie we missed earlier.”

#miles makes my heart warm #he is an absolute ham #miles morales imagines #miles morales imagine #miles morales x reader #into the spiderverse imagine #into the spiderverse imagines #spider man:into the spiderverse #miles morales

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fakemuggle529-blog · 5 years ago

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"HARRY DID YOU PUT YOUR NAME IN THE GOBLET OF FIRE?!?!"

I could go on for days about the differences between the HP books and the movies (just ask my wife). 7 books, 8 movies, 4 directors, 2 screenplay writers, a myriad of actors or varying levels of talent, but this 1 line haunts every single Harry Potter fan. One comment about this line was "we're never going to get over this, are we?" That one comment sparked this post, which was originally meant to be a list of my least favorite movie moments and why.

But Harry Potter is my favorite subject, and my rant about this became a separate post to answer that rhetorical question.

Simply put, no, we're not going to get over it. But why won't we?

As with any adaptation, since the world isn't ready for a 10 hour movie based on 1 book, bits and pieces of the Harry Potter books needed to be cut out. (I'd be down for that movie, but I digress)

Things like the Draco/Pansy romance, Rita Skeeter being an unregistered Animagus, or winning the Quidditch cup ultimately don't have an impact on the plot of "evil wizard finds path to immortality, boy wizard must stop him with the help of his friends," so they can get cut pretty easily.

Even things like the Marauders' full moon adventures and creation of the Map, Umbridge setting the dementors on Harry, and Neville's parents' fate are secondary material, meant to give more weight to the main story:

- The world would still be in mortal danger without four teenagers creating a map of their school, but that map helped stop that danger;

- Umbridge would still be a cruel bitch if we hadn't known she sent the dementors, but that tidbit show her own demented state of mind and how far she'll go to get what she wants.

- and we'd still want Voldemort dead even if we'd never heard of Neville Longbottom, because we've seen the impact he had on Harry. The info about the Longbottoms just gives more depth to the characters involved.

But regardless of what they left out, the basics stayed the same: "evil wizard finds path to immortality, boy wizard must stop him with the help of his friends" continued, except the written version had more information than the visual. The fans already knew what was missing, so our brains filled it in for us. And leaving out that bit of info for the adaptation process allowed people who hadn't read the books to know what was going on and how the information fit together, even if they had less information than the fans.

(I think of the miniseries Chernobyl, when the general asks how a nuclear reactor works. He gets a bare bones explanation, and can parrot it back to his subordinates later. He might not me able to do the math or understand all of the technical jargon, but that simple explanation has given him enough info to get things going.)

As the movies progressed, we saw more and more get left out since the books only got longer, or more in depth, or both which each new addition, but no matter what, that skeleton was still there, "evil wizard finds path to immortality, boy wizard must stop him with the help of his friends." And the 'friends' part was even more accurate with supporting characters!

Hermione was the nerd from the books, Ron was the goofy best friend, Neville was the underdog, Draco was the bully!

Every single character was fitting their book counterparts perfectly, they just couldn't be as in depth in this medium!

Lucius was the oily bastard you knew he was, Sirius was the Godfather who wanted to be there but couldn't, Bellatrix was the psychotic fanatic who'd do anything to earn Voldemort's praise, Dumbledo--

And that's where the similarities stop.

Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore is a lot of things: he's the Chief Warlock of the Wizengamot (the Wizard High Court), honoree of the highest medal of Honor possible for Wizards, one of the most notable contributors to the field of alchemy, and from what I understand a PHENOMENAL dancer.

He's human, and fallible like any other human, but he is definitely not stupid.

Just in book 1, before Ms. Rowling had even gotten into her stride as a storyteller, we see Dumbledore:

Send Harry to the safest place possible; watch over him as much as possible; send updated owls to Harry with every change of address; send Hagrid as the most friendly way to introduce Harry to his true world; Send Harry the invisibility cloak as a connection to his dad; say that he 'doesn't need a cloak to become invisible;' RETURN the cloak after Harry lost it; and turned around on his trip to London on some intuition, barely managing to save Harry's life.

While he might not be the warmest of people, probably due to a tendency to think too deeply, Dumbledore shows the strongest of power when he needs to fight, the quickest of words when he needs to talk, and what seems to be a clear sense of right and wrong (the waters get a little murky with that last one, but he stands up for what he sees is wrong, regardless of what he thought at 18), and a calm dignity, even while getting his feathers ruffled.

And that's exactly why this gets under our skin so much.

As fans of the books, we see Dumbledore do it all, in great detail. Even that infamous line is ended with "he asked CALMLY" (All Caps is my addition). We see Dumbledore:

-sit next to an 11-year old who nearly died recently and promise to some day tell him about the first time he nearly died as an infant AT THE HANDS OF THE SAME GUY... Calmly, because this is a conversation he's been dreading for years, so he's prepared.

- hire a clear fraud just to fill his staff; have two 12-year olds crash an illegal flying car into a living tree AND talk down the teacher that wanted to skin them alive; deal with an unknown threat that was attempting to kill his students; get forcibly removed from the school, only return ready to console grieving parents AND watch the same 12 year olds from earlier emerge from an unfindable chamber WITH the 11 year old who was thought to be dead....calmly, because he's lost loved ones, and he knows what it is to grieve.

- Hire a werewolf; keep that a secret from his students, their parents, and maybe even the government; and have two 13 year olds illegally time travel to save an animal an a convicted felon...calmly, because an innocent man's life is important.

- Host a death tournament specially designed to 'not kill;' and slowly watch a plot to revive to worst wizard ever unfold before his eyes....calmly, because he didn't have all of the information yet.

- Get slandered by the entirety of the government, and forcibly removed from his position in the Courts; have a government spy forced onto his staff; purposefully pissed her off; evade arrest and go on the lam...calmly, because he knows he's right, and the truth will out. THEN come back, fight every Death Eater in the ministry, fight Voldemort, convince the government not to arrest him, then talk Harry through his Godfather's death....calmly, because he knows he messed up, he even says that Harry show be so much angrier, and 'please, by all means, destroy my possessions'.

- Find out he's dying; find out there's a hit on him; recruit an old colleague, and use Harry as a means to reveal a crucial part of Voldemort's past, which he's been teaching to Harry all year; find a horcrux as well as pass on as much info about them as possible; AND get psychologically tortured mere moments before being murdered....

- AND, postmortem, we find out that Dumbledore has been playing pretty much everybody, but especially Harry....calmly, because for once, it really was "the greater good."

But he was fun loving too, maybe childishly so due to the fact that he had to grow up so fast.

- Some of His first words after Harry starts school are, "Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! And tweak!"

- He did what was best for the school AND Firenze by hiring the centaur, but he clearly enjoyed shoving it in Umbridge's face.

- and let's not forget the night he picked Harry up front Privet Drive. He obviously made those glasses hit the Dursleys as some small payback for how they treated Harry.

That's Dumbledore. Serious, wise, and seriously wise, with a penchant for mischief.

The movie Dumbledore gave none of that, especially with that terrible, terrible reading of that line.

That one line changed the entire character of Albus Dumbledore. Instead of the cool, calm, and collected man he always was, he lost control. In front of his foreign and governmental guests nonetheless. That would never happen to Dumbledore. He's seen the signs, and can tell something is up. That's WHY he hired "Mad-Eye."

Even that stupid Christmas scene added to the HBP movie, as much as I freaking HATE it, doesn't CHANGE anything. The Death Eaters attack and for some reason burn the house down. Boo hoo. Nobody gets hurt, nobody dies, the house is back to normal the next movie. No big deal. They just wanted to add to the drama some, instead of the usual deduction from the cuts.

This change is why we hate SO many other adaptations, or "cuts" as they call them.

-Those of us who are old enough to remember will freaking riot over the "Han shot first" argument, because we knew that there was no way in hell Han would sit and let Greedo take a shot at him, ESPECIALLY since they freaking showed it first, then changed it later.

-It's why we all hate M. Night. Shyamalan's fucking guts, because he took the single greatest cartoon masterpiece ever created, and tried to make it better. The one scene that sticks out to me is when they're trying to escape the earth-bending prison camp. First, they had to be removed from the land entirely, or their pride would cause a rebellion instantly; second, 6 benders did what we see Toph do her first lesson as a blind toddler. Unlike Lucas, Shyamalan wasn't trying to appease anyone. He just wanted a name for himself, so he decided to take on the most popular cartoon ever. Pass or fail, he has that fame now.

Some of the fault might lie with the director, or possibly even the actor himself. Michael Gambon is a respected actor, and probably had a sense for how the character would play, even if that sense might not have been based in the books. Couple that with multiple directors by this point, multiple actors having playing Dumbledore, and the books still gradually coming out, and the information and range for the character of Dumbledore might have been quite limited.

And let's not forget those cuts that needed to be made. With a shorter story comes a need to get the information across faster.

Instead of mulling it over for a moment while the rest of the group argues (and probably for a good year or so by this point), and calmly asking Harry if he entered himself in the tournament, the quick explosion both saves time by cutting the opening argument AND gives the audience a cue for suspense. They know something is wrong NOW, and they don't know what, but they'll find out as the people on screen do.

Personally, I believe that this system can be broken by a rather simple solution: TV show.

Instead of one movie, each book gets one Season, and every couple chapters or so gets an episode. I foresee problems as we get to the later books as opposed to the early one, since they start getting thick AF with GoF.

But I think the pros outweigh the cons.

-The locations for HP are actually incredibly limited. They pretty much go back and forth between the same dozen locations all seven books, so you could make sets to switch out whenever needed, and just reuse the exact same sets for seven straight years, with little to no change in between.

- We have all of the books now, and then some, and then some extra BS on top of that, and the plethora of headcanon out there, so we have more than enough information for every single thing about this place, excluding literal physical dimensions. Find a kid who looks like Harry, another actor who can flawlessly pull off Snape, and some old guy who wants to be goofy sometimes, and you've got gold.

- We could actually include the minor characters too. Peeves could pop in and out every few episodes, Dobby can play the role he was meant for, Kreacher can exist as more than 3 lines. The vanishing cabinet could actually be introduced in year 2, then addressed in Year 5, then revealed properly in year 6. Moaning Myrtle has her scenes, Bill Weasley has his, Tonks could be the most important female character besides Hermione or Ginny.....

Anyway, you get the picture. This whole thing was inspired by one comment, and I've been working on this for almost 6 hours now. Pretty sure I've worked harder in this post than any papers in high school...

Hollywood, if by some miracle you see this, I'll totally be a screen writer for the Harry Potter TV show. In the meantime, goodnight.

#harry potter series #harry potter #albus dumbledore #dumbledore #draco malfoy #ron weasley #hermione granger #sirius black #molly weasley

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sparda3g · 5 years ago

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Attack on Titan Chapter 119 Review

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The craze fest of the anime is over for now, but the manga keeps on going. If the last season garnered new manga readers and caught up to this recent chapter, then what a hell of a time to witness the extravaganza. Isayama has said that this chapter was a rushed work due to his busy schedule. I believe 21 pages were needed to be done under a short period of time; needless to say, that’s pretty tough. Despite that one notable inconsistency and not the cleanest, this chapter was everything that the series is well known for in its highest degree. It was thrilling, shocking, suspenseful, and mind-blowing.

Right from the very start, the tension is incredibly high. Every possible setup is planted. Zeke is down, Eren must be stopped, Survey Corps veterans are on their way, and Falco’s life depends on Zeke’s feelings. The fate of the war relies on the brothers. One contact and it’s all over. It’s mind-numbing to even consider how a simple touch of the two is all it takes; like reaching for a touchdown. The last chapter was nothing but chaos, but this one lead everyone to throw everything they got. Whatever it takes. It’s downright enticing to the very end.

After a reminder on what I just explained, the action resume with the thrills and chills of Eren reaching for Zeke. Never thought a simple contact can be this exciting. They might as well pull an E.T. finger touch for the hell of it. Porco tries to slow Eren down, but good God, he gets pummeled really badly. It’s the worst beating I have seen in a while, and it only took two hits. Thankfully for Pieck, she’s back as Cart Titan and Magath takes a clean shot to Eren’s head. This is what, third head shot? The man is a true marksman.

I was hoping for Armin and Mikasa to reach for Eren, but unfortunately, Marley soliders are everywhere, including inside the buildings. This forced them to change the direction and take on Marley Army first before going to Eren. Judging by the end, that could be a fatal mistake, but we’ll get to that later. Basically, Isayama is preventing them to have a true (and hopefully) fateful reunion. Everyone else like Pixis and Nile is doing their part, so their plan is in process. It was going well, until Zeke finally wakes up.

Immediately, I begin to shake nervously for a possible end. The anime did announce the final season begins next year Fall. If you do the math, theoretically, the manga could end in next year Summer. Granted, there have been series that has ended in the middle of the final season, so it’s possible for this one to be the case. After all, Isayama is in behind the scene, but time will tell. With all that said, I don’t know where the story is heading, so Zeke and Eren making a contact has a good chance of happening. In short, I buy into anything what this story can dish out.

Although Porco got the beating of a lifetime, which says something since he has been pummeled a lot, he does receive a warranted truth of his brother’s last night. It’s worth mentioning that the reason why Porco was able to see it was due to Reiner’s hand causing a glitch of Paths. This was exclusive to anime with the recent change to have Historia explore Ymir’s life and near death in under 10 seconds. Isayama does work with the anime behind the scene. This is all nice because Porco can finally understand his brother’s love; letting out his burden in tears. As a little brother, this speaks to me.

Aside from world changing, the next worst case scenario is here: the call for the titans. Part of me want to believe Eren didn’t want this to happen, based on his expression. Actually, he looks like he was reaching his hand to tell him don’t. It’s likely he tried to keep the damage incredibly minimum, but everything as of late has come crashing down. Now that Zeke wakes up and about to call the titans, more people will die and suffer. If true, then I really pity him. No matter how well he planned out, the cost will always vary.

The scene with the huge gamble pleading from Colt is bone-chilling and quite saddening. This is all or nothing for Falco and Colt let Zeke know about everything, including his demand. All he wants is to save his little brother from becoming a titan. He only wish for Zeke to put it on hold and wait until Falco is far away. This is convincing. As selfish it is in a sense, it would have been a decent way to not kill off Falco and still roar to kill off others. Granted, it will still suck big time for Nile and Pixis, but Falco doesn’t deserve any of it. It’s damn suspenseful, and watching Colt’s expression was beginning to hurt me. The result: no good.

I should mention that this chapter is very worthy for live reaction. I couldn’t tell you how much I was furious when Zeke calls for titans. I only remember shouting, “**** you! What the ****!!” After cooling down, it is true that Zeke does feel the pain for doing so, but he’s a man on a mission. He will do whatever it takes to fulfill his destiny. It still pisses me off, but karma sure makes up for it down the line.

Clearly, Isayama has some hate on brotherhood. I guess Full Metal Alchemist is his most hated series. Joking aside, it pains the hell out of me when Colt refuses to leave, stand by to Falco’s side to the very end. Dammit to hell, this was gut-wrenching. Gabi, after growing up, now have to lose another friend or even a potential lover. Falco, Nile, Pixis, and the rest all transform to titans. This was a low blow. Those three didn’t deserve this. Granted, Pixis was seen controversial, but he wasn’t much of a bad figure by this point. At least he got to drink one last time.

I’m not sure if Zeke is aware of how much Reiner cherished these kids, but it’s messed up for him to send Falco to attack. Living as Reiner is pure hell. He stops Eren from escaping, but Falco aims for his nape. You could tell Reiner doesn’t want to kill Falco at all. If anything, the situation gives him an opportunity; more on it later. I was cheery when Magath takes a shot at Zeke; yeah, I was still mad at this point. Sadly, Pieck has to go against Armin and Mikasa. Guys, I like you two and all, but don’t make me hate you if you kill her. Just saying. Unbelievable that Floch is once again the sole survivor. Isayama, you better give him a satisfying death for all of us.

Reiner’s scene almost had me convinced me that this is the end for him. He wasn’t as suicidal as before, but the floor map made it possible for him to sacrifice his life for the one he cared the most. Case in point, Falco is close to devouring the Armored Titan, but that’s fine for Reiner. It’s his chance to make it right. It lined-up perfectly with his old intention to pass it to him anyway, so the setup was perfect. But of course, not everything goes accordingly.

I don’t have much opinion on Porco as a character, but his last action is pretty enlightening; a proper sendoff when all things considered. It is him that’ll take the fall. He could have simply just die, but instead, he prefers to pass the Jaw Titan to Falco in order to save him. That’s a nice twist; didn’t think of that somehow. I like his last standing moment; reflecting that he has no more regrets. He felt the brotherly love, and know that he’ll always be better than Reiner. Falco devours, but we don’t see him change back to human. The point is, he’s now the Jaw Titan. This was a really nice moment all in all. You did fine, Porco. You did fine.

The whole make or break scene is amazingly breathtaking.

The tension was already high; now, it surpasses the heaven’s sky. Eren hardening the titan to trap Reiner, so he can break off and run in person to Zeke, who is now in person but can’t walk. It doesn’t matter; all they need to do is make contact and it is game over. The suspense level is running wild. Reiner is a man on a mission; a mission that he will complete at all cost. Gone with Reiner the sad man; here comes the beast! The intensity is just crazy; I forgot what page I was on.

I was actually pretty upset when Jean and Connie interfere and shoots down Reiner. He’s stopped. Pieck is stopped. Falco is stopped. Everyone that is a threat is stopped. Yelena, Floch, and everyone in the Yeagerists’ dream will come true. Then, there’s the one with a rifle. The one that is called Gabi. I lost track in time, I don’t know who’s available to stop her. The answer: no one. The build-up to the suspense felt like time has stopped; it’s unnerving as hell. Then, the ending happens and as God as my witness, the final two double-page spread shook the shit out of me. Eren’s head flies off and Zeke’s dream dies right before his eyes.

Oh, how I wished I recorded my reactions.

Before I theorize, I want to express my thoughts on Zeke, starting with the bad me. This is what he deserved for calling out the titans. Falco was pure, and although he will return as Jaw Titan, the thought on his action was unacceptable. If this isn’t the perfect example of “Karma is a bitch,” I don’t know what is. Now the good me. It’s pretty sad that his dream has died, right when he was so close to make it happen. It is bad enough to see it die, it is worse that his little brother is the one to go out. Let’s not forget the amount of sacrifices and sufferings he has gone through. All of his hard work died in vain in a matter of second. Also, his time as Beast Titan is almost up. His chance to make his dream come true is gone.

The big question is, is Eren dead?

I do believe he’s not dead, but it is tough to figure out what he will do to escape death in that situation. I have heard the theory on manipulating the memories or creating an illusion based on Eren’s clothes. Recently, Isayama noted that he had to rush to reach deadline, so it’s likely the pants sleeve that was supposed to be ripped off was a mistake. I know some would argue that’s not possible, but I recalled other series having a similar mistake. In Naruto, a past character reflects his wish to be Hokage, only in the background, the timeline don’t add up. It was corrected in the volume release. Plus, it’s been a while since we’ve last seen Eren in person, so a mistake is likely.

I would guess that maybe Eren is pulling the same trick as Reiner back in the last arc with transferring the consciousness to the titan. The only part that confuses me is the fact Eren’s neck is wiped out. It was a clean cut; almost like the artist simply use an eraser to erase the neck region. Maybe the Warhammer Titan has a trick that he learned to do but kept it quiet in front of everyone. I honestly don’t know. For all I know, the pants could be a huge clue. If, and it’s a huge if, he dies, well, let the meltdown begin.

Whether he is dead or not, I do think it’s best to end it like this and call it a day. The plan is meant to be the end all be all, so it might as well call this day a great fail. We are due for intermission. It would be a good time to change the scenery, especially since Levi’s life is still in pending. I’m not saying it should change immediately; it should show us the conclusion first. That said, I would expect plenty of reactions. Yelena will most likely lose her mind. Floch will probably follow as well. I’m curious on Armin and Mikasa. For Armin’s sake, run away from Yelena. Gabi, start running.

This chapter was jaw-dropping. Despite not at its best quality, the sequences, the atmosphere, and the adrenaline rush were all top notch. The chapter’s title truly focus on the very concept. It’s disheartening on how it was addressed however, but it was felt, well-executed, and captured the spirit of brotherhood in its saddest time. This was an emotional roller coaster. The cliffhanger threw me off big time. I joked about Season 3 Part 2 as the true Game of Thrones Season 8; you didn’t need to kill the main character like one. In all seriousness, I don’t believe he’s dead, but the answer will have to wait and that itself is unbearable. Undoubtedly, the worst cliffhanger in the series. The wait is the true killer of them all.

#attack on titan #shingeki no kyojin #chapter 119 #review #spoilers

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do-your-socks-have-holes-in-them · 6 years ago

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Til the End of the Night / Ch8: In which Logan invents fantasy Skype

Previous / Masterpost / Next

Summary: If you like dialogue, this is the chapter for you.

Warnings: creepy nightmare-ish stuff that I’m not sure how to classify, if you do uhh let me know? just... be careful of the end of the chapter in general

A/N: we’re a week away from being done crossposting old chapters yayy

Read on AO3

Roman’s mirror glowed softly for a second, then changed to show him an overhead view of a small clearing in the forest. It was fairly dark, but he could tell his friends had made camp there, and Logan appeared to be on… well, largely ignoring the duty of being on watch. Before he could make out any more details, though, the scene disappeared. He tapped the mirror a few times and tried to get it functioning again to no avail. Just as he was about to give up and lament the fact that even this wasn’t working for him now, a portion of it lit up again. Only a small oval, but that was better than showing him nothing. He was more than a little confused when what it showed him was a close-up view of Logan, looking right at him and very pleased with himself.

“Oh, good, it worked,” Logan said, just above a whisper.

“Wh- what worked? How have you done this, and what exactly the heck is this that you did?”

“It was a simple matter of following instructions.” He tilted his hand mirror to show Roman the alchemy book he’d been working from and what was left of the mixture. “It seemed like a good idea to check on you, so, remembering that you had mentioned a magic mirror, I made one of my own. It seems that viewing each other simultaneously gives us a more direct connection, which I did not expect, but is very helpful.”

“Oh.” Roman had never needed to go through any sort of process to make things enchanted, they just sort of were, but he supposed it made sense for Logan. More importantly, though, he didn’t remember ever putting any kind of defined alchemy system in place for this world, which meant… “Wait, did you come into my fantasy world and immediately cause science to exist? I don’t know what to say. You’ve somehow managed to become even nerdier here.”

“Thank you.”

“It wasn’t… never mind. Oh- I’ve been trying to keep an eye on you guys, but I was… somewhat distracted this evening, unfortunately. I didn’t miss anything important, did I?”

“As a matter of fact,” Logan said, striving to convey the degree of annoyance he felt without raising his voice, “you did. We were attacked. You could have at least warned us there might be a possibility of unreasonably sized arachnids trying to eat us.”

Roman’s eyes widened. “Oh dear. I, uh, that completely slipped my mind.” In his defense, he didn’t like to think about giant man-eating spiders any more than strictly necessary. “Sorry. But you weren’t hurt, right?”

“No, we were able to lose it in the forest.”

“Good.” And a huge relief in more ways than one. Close calls were an adventuring staple, although Logan probably wouldn’t appreciate being told so, which meant his ruling on what kind of story this was- the kind where nobody got seriously injured and the heroes always won in the end- hadn’t lost its power. “...Wait, how far did you have to go to lose it? Where are you?”

Logan glanced up at the sky, looked in a few different directions, and appeared to be doing math in his head. Finally he turned back to Roman and said with confidence, “I have absolutely no idea.”

“Oh, for… You’re lost?”

“Excuse me for not tracking the exact route we took while trying not to die!”

Roman sighed. “You’re supposed to stay on the path for a reason, you know, it’s nearly impossible to find it again once you’re deep enough in the forest. It’s fine, it’s fine, it’s just going to take you at least another day to get out now, if not more. I suppose it would be too much to ask that you actually try fighting the thing instead next time, but running away from everything doesn’t make for a very good story.”

Logan raised an eyebrow, not amused. “Was that a joke, or do you have some delusion of any of us actually doing that?”

“Okay, I suppose not, you can’t all be as awesome as me.” It was a comment that could have lightened the mood a bit, had he not sounded genuinely frustrated by the fact that they couldn’t do the things he himself easily could have.

“How silly of you to forget how much better you clearly are than everyone else.” Logan dialed up the sarcasm in case Roman tried to take it as a genuine compliment. “Despite the fact that you failed to mention several things that could have, and in fact almost did go horribly wrong.”

“Look, it’s not as if I knew there would be--”

“What about earlier? Did you know everyone in that town would be so eager to make assumptions based on Virgil’s unconventional appearance? Could you not have warned us about that, or maybe even not given them that prejudice in the first place? Are there any more unpleasant surprises you’re not telling us about, Roman? We’re actual people, not characters in your story, and I for one do not appreciate all the plot twists!”

Roman was speechless for a few seconds, taken aback and starting to get a little angry himself. “As a matter of fact, no, I can’t see the future, but thanks so much for blaming everything on me when it’s you three who have been messing with my perfectly good creations since you got here! I’ve never even seen this part of the forest or I’d tell you how to get out of it, but no, you had to make it more confusing than it already was and stick in a whole cliff that never existed before. Besides, I don’t have complete control under any circumstances, I can’t make people do whatever I want, and if you think that’s how it works you’ve clearly never written fiction before!” That wasn’t quite true, he did invent the place, after all, he could have chosen to make them more open-minded- and would, when he had time to change it- but right now he couldn’t do anything about it anyway, and he was feeling defensive to begin with, and Logan was yelling at him about things someone like him couldn’t possibly even understand, and he wasn’t about to concede any points now.

“I hope you don’t mean to imply that we caused any of this,” Logan said coldly.

“No, that wasn’t what I- I just- look, I am not having a good day, alright? I-”

“Oh, you’re not- and what kind of day do you think Patton and Virgil and I have been having?”

Roman ignored him and kept talking, punctuating his run-on sentence with gestures towards things Logan couldn’t actually see. “I’ve been stuck in this tiny room by myself for like a week now and there’s nothing to do, you don’t understand how awful it is not being able to do anything, I can’t even see outside, it’s the worst, and I’m not supposed to be the one this happens to, but nothing is going right anymore and now you’re mad at me and it’s not even my fault, it’s the stupid Dragon Witch, she’s ruining everything and she just had to come rub it in earlier and I can’t do anything right anymore and now she has this whole stupid castle because I can’t do anything right--”

“Wait, what?”

Roman froze. He hadn’t meant to let that slip, but he was just so frustrated, and whatever, they would have found out when they saw it anyway. “I- she tricked me, okay? It was- it was very cunning.”

“You made her a castle? You couldn’t do anything about the things that happened to us but you can create a whole castle for your antagonist? I know you have some strange need to make things as hard as possible for yourself, but there’s no need to force that on us!”

“I didn’t do it on purpose! I- frankly, I don’t think I even did it by mistake! I don’t know what happened, I…”

“You… don’t know? How can you not- clearly you did something,” Logan said, confused and exasperated.

“Okay, so I thought about a castle, but I think about plenty of things that don’t end up forcing themselves into existence against my will, so I still hardly think I can be blamed!”

“Against your- you mean you really didn’t just… make it without thinking, or something?”

“Of course I didn’t make it without thinking! I was specifically thinking that I wasn’t going to make it, and then- she used me, I don’t know how, and it is quite honestly a little scary, so I would love if you would just leave me alone about it!” Oh, and now he’d gone and told him everything, which was another thing he’d specifically wanted to not do, and Logan knew exactly how badly he’d screwed up and was probably going to yell at him even more and respect him even less. Roman looked anywhere but at the mirror, wishing he hadn’t said any of that. There was a silence he didn’t know how to fill.

“...I apologize.”

Wait, what?

Logan adjusted his glasses needlessly, looking uncomfortable. “It seems that my initial assessment of the situation was incorrect, and I said some things that… may have been hurtful. I’m afraid I was listening to my own frustration with recent events rather than what you were trying to tell me. I apologize for not believing you.”

“Oh.” Roman was a bit shocked. Apologies from Logan were rare, which he would doubtless say was because he was usually right. “I… Accepted, I suppose.” This was where he was supposed to also apologize, wasn’t it? “And, uh, sorry I got mad at you for not being very good at adventures when that isn’t your job and I can’t fairly expect it of you. Do you… want to start the conversation over and… not yell at each other this time? Or, uh, whisper aggressively… you know what I mean.”

“Yes. Yes, that… sounds good.” Logan nodded, relieved that for once an argument between them hadn’t ended in someone becoming angry enough to storm out.

“So,” Roman said, tone light and careful. “What did I miss when I wasn’t watching you?”

Logan thought about it for a moment, and responded just as cautiously. “We walked for a while, so you didn’t miss much there, and then a giant spider attacked us, but we were able to escape it. We ran through the forest for a while and ended up in this clearing. They went to sleep-” he turned the mirror so Roman could see the other two sleeping, and heard a soft “aww” from his end- “while I took the first watch, and eventually, contacted you.”

“Yes, I can tell you’ve been doing an admirable job of watching,” Roman said dryly.

“I would notice if anything actually happened,” Logan defended himself, “which it hasn’t and most likely won’t. How about you, how did your day go?”

Roman sighed, folding his arms as he recalled it. “The witch came in to gloat about having me trapped here, you know, basic villain stuff, and she got me thinking about this castle she wanted, and I knew I shouldn’t but I was so bored I ended up planning it, don’t yell at me, and then she… I don’t know… she got into my head somehow and pulled it out and it existed. And now I don’t know if I can trust myself to think about anything I don’t want to actually happen anymore.” He looked uncharacteristically dejected at the thought of having to restrain his thoughts, not being able to escape his boredom with another layer of daydream in case something went bad, and that kind of sadness on him struck Logan as deeply wrong.

“I… may have some thoughts that could help with that,” he offered.

“Really?” Roman’s expression did a complete 180, and Logan had to take a second to process it. He looked thoroughly eager to hear what Logan had to say, which was Logan’s favorite kind of look to get. He was almost tempted to draw out the suspense just to get a little more of it, but no, that was silly.

Logan shrugged. “Well, she can’t actually read your mind, right? Otherwise she would know we were coming to find you, and would have stopped us by now. I doubt she’ll try to create anything through you if she doesn’t know what you’re thinking about.”

“True,” Roman agreed. “She might end up with an angry manticore-chimera in the middle of the room.”

“...Sure. Is that really what you spend your time thinking about? Never mind, don’t answer that. As I was saying, just be on your guard next time she talks to you, and if you notice her trying to lead your thoughts somewhere, you can… I don’t know, distract yourself. You’re good at not paying attention to what people are saying to you; it shouldn’t be a problem. If it is, though, you could try practicing meditation to teach yourself to clear your mind or refocus your thoughts when you need to. Don’t give me that look, it’s not like you have anything better to do and it helps, ask Virgil. And if you don’t like any of those ideas,” he added with a slight smirk, “you can always try making up absurdly dangerous creatures in your head out of spite every time she’s in the room.”

Roman laughed, muffling the sound with his hand. “Sounds good to me. I think I’ll- oh shoot don’t say anything, shh--” He spun to face the door and snapped a cloth into existence to cover the mirror. Logan kept still to avoid accidentally clinking any bottles together or anything, and stayed as quiet as possible until the darkness morphed back into Roman’s face.

“I heard a noise in the hallway,” he explained in his softest whisper. “I don’t think she heard anything, but I’d rather not risk it. I should go.”

Logan nodded in agreement. “And we both need to sleep at some point tonight. I have a good reason to be awake right now, but I doubt very much that you do.”

“Oh, hush, you’re not my mother. You’re not even Patton. Speaking of which, you’ll let the others use that thing too, right?”

“Of course, I’ll show them tomorrow. Go to bed.”

“Fineee.” He broke the connection with a needlessly dramatic hand gesture, rolling his eyes.

Logan rolled his eyes in return even though he couldn’t be seen anymore, deactivated his own mirror by simply tapping the frame, and packed it carefully in a few layers of cotton padding before tucking it back into his satchel. He didn’t really understand Roman, didn’t even like him sometimes, but talking to him had been… good. Despite the initial fighting, or maybe because of it, he felt better about things now. He packed up the rest of his things and checked the time on his phone. About time to switch out. He stood and made his way over to the blanket-tarp-thing, which he really wished he knew the proper name for, but that wasn’t particularly relevant right now. Going to sleep was relevant right now.

Virgil opened his eyes almost before Logan had actually made contact with his shoulder, making him wonder if he’d even been asleep in the first place. He was a very light sleeper. Hopefully the whispering hadn’t woken him up. He turned onto his stomach and stretched, catlike, before getting up to trade places. Logan nodded to him and lay down, sighing in resignation when Patton immediately latched onto his arm. It wasn’t as if he could wake him up and tell him to stop, and he probably wouldn’t stop anyway, since this was apparently his natural instinct when unconscious. “Your problem now,” Virgil mouthed over his shoulder before walking away.

Virgil leaned against a tree and slid down it until he was on the ground, rubbing his eyes with a sigh. In terms of places he could sleep, this was a whole lot worse than the inn. Pine needles weren’t actually all that great at being a comfortable thing to lie on, and being in the forest had him on edge. He’d been drifting between various states of half-consciousness at best. At least his “ability” to stay awake until the sun came up was going to be useful now, for once. He pushed his hood down to make sure he wouldn’t miss any important sounds and settled in to wait for morning.

He didn’t fall asleep at any point, he was sure of that, but one moment everything was normal and the next, when he opened his eyes after blinking, the clearing had been blanketed in a thick fog. Not just thick, heavy- pressing him into the ground, slowing his movements. He went to stand up and felt like he was trying to run underwater, or in a nightmare- the futility was the same. The air had the approximate resistance of peanut butter, and a similar ability to keep him from speaking when he tried to open his mouth and call for the others. A cool breeze that should have been soothing sent an uncomfortable prickling sensation throughout his body and made his hair stand on end. Something was wrong, and he may not have been able to say what it was, but it was most definitely not just him being vague.

He pushed himself to his feet, using the tree beside him for support. The distance to the cliff had become daunting, but he had to get over there, he needed to warn them. Walking was suddenly the most difficult thing he’d ever had to do. Whatever force this was might not want him to move in any other direction, but it would be perfectly happy to let him go down, and getting up had been hard enough the first time. He fought to reach the next closest tree, and then the next, stopping to rest and take deep breaths of air that wasn’t quite air. He was so close.

So close, no more than fifteen feet away, and yet close wasn’t good enough when he still couldn’t reach them, couldn’t make a sound. The fog was filling his head, or maybe that numb, muffled feeling was just the result of it filling his lungs. It was growing denser around him. It was closing in. He couldn’t move. No, no, he had to move, he was going to move. He took another step and faltered, the air pushing him down with renewed force, but caught himself. The trees spun around him for a second. Come on, please, so close. Fog swirled around him in a gust of wind that did nothing to help him breathe, tugging at his clothes and hair, circling tendrils around his limbs that didn’t quite dissipate with the rest. He was officially very scared, and it was a struggle just to remain standing, and he still had no idea what this was or what he could do even if he did make it to his friends, but he had to try something.

He moved forward once more and nearly fell, feeling as if he’d been tripped, but there was nothing to trip over when he looked down. His head spun, and he bit his lip, trying to focus. It had gotten cold, a damp chill seeping through his robes and permeating his body. One more step, come on. He pushed himself forward, and then everything tilted and he was on the ground, cursing internally. He struggled to sit up and froze, eyes wide with fear.

Humanoid figures were emerging from the fog, or possibly forming themselves from it, too unsettlingly tall to actually be mistaken for human. They were featureless, being made of fog and all, and yet he couldn’t help but feel like they were staring at him. He stared back, eyes narrowed, trying to convey despite his inability to speak that they better not try anything. Unfortunately, everyone involved knew perfectly well there was nothing he could do about it, and they didn’t appear to care.

They started closing in, and he was trying to get up and he just couldn’t, and he wondered distantly where that magic went that had been so eager to protect him earlier when he didn’t even want it, and then one of them got close enough to touch Logan and oh, there it was. Sparking angrily in his hand. Which was out in front of him now somehow, despite his arms previously being too heavy to lift. The offending fog-creature may or may not have turned to look at him, and he glared back at where he imagined its eyes probably were. It backed off. His mouth twisted into a slightly terrifying half-smile, and he was starting to like this “having scary magic powers” thing, and then one of them appeared behind him and pressed a cold, ghostlike hand to his forehead and the sparks fizzled out as everything went dark.

#sanders sides #roman sanders #logan sanders #virgil sanders #patton sanders #my post #my writing #til the end of the night

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r95irth · 7 years ago

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What are Satoru's relationship with his other siblings, Satoru, Mimi, Haku, Hajime, Fujiko, Mitsuka, Hino, Rei, Hana and Kazu? Does Big Mother loves her son? Did you name your oc villain, Big Mother after two One Piece characters, Big Mom and Mother Caramel?

Hello Anon =)

I will first answer your question about my oc, if that’s okay with you. But under spoilers for better care readers ^^

Big mother does love her son very much, she is just unable to go past her own self and see him as his own being. When i did some researches about mentally-ill mother i found a lot of interesting stuff about depression / post-partum depression. Which made me imagine a situation where the mother couldn’t stand the fact that her kid wasn’t part of her anymore (couldn’t feel what she felt - like when they were in her womb) which lead me to Big Mother’s condition. I don’t know if it’s a true mental disease, but i do know that abuser are often selfish to this point. Since Big mother is an abusive mother i was like, why not ? So big mother loves her son, but she is just too selfish about it.

As for her name, her real name is Airi, which come from the anime/manga Erased. (I pick names from there and there of show/animes i like) since Satoru’s name came from there too. Her alias is from the litterature book BIG BROTHER, which is a story about a world where the Tyran in place has a thoughts-police that can read mind (though i’m not sure it’s been a while since ir ead it), and put posters everywhere saying “Big brother is watching you”. I thought it fit big mother’s quirk since she can know what you think of her. She would be an awful tyran like Big Brother xD

As for Satoru’s relationship with his siblings…Mimi, Hino and Rei are planned in Better care universe, i don’t know about other, i didn’t ask their respective owner. I would love to have them as “real” Satoru’s sibling of course….(but that would force me to rewrite a bunch of things and makes my chrono and do math)

So everything i will say next is hypothetically speaking and up to multiverse (in a universe i’m less lazy and better at math and i actually ask everyone if they want Satoru to be their oc’s sibling, and they agreed. THOUGh it’s okay if they not, because not everyone has the same view on characters and have different expectations of their favorites relationship/family’s dynamic)

Satoru is a very doting older brother. He has a maternal instinct that is very strong and is very protective with his other siblings. Actually i wouldn’t be surprise to hear say “my babies” when speaking about them sometimes xD He was, after all, considering ebing a teacher like his aunt at one point. But Satoru is also a tease. He likes make comments. So he would kind of be like that with them too? I don’t know how to describe it, but i would have this kind of scene in my mind like :

Younger sibling : Why can’t i do that? Satoru is allowed to do it!

Shouto : Because Satoru is older than you?

Momo : He wasn’t allowed to do it when he was your age.

Satoru : because i never was dumb enough to get caught while doing it.

Shouto and Momo *gasp and stare at their son*

Satoru : i mean - this is bad don’t do it, listen to Papa and Mama!

He is certainly not envcouraging his brothers and sisters to do wrong, but if he saw the opportunity to make a comment, oh boy he will take it. And he will probably be the older brother you go ask questions you don’t want to ask your parents. Like sexuals questions or feeling questions. He is very blunt about this and he would say his mind right away. And then he will probably be “you should ask papa and mama about it too”

sibling : why? It’s embarrassing.

Satoru : Yeah that’s the point. It’s so funny when they are embarrassed about these kind of stuffs.

As for the rest, i did say that Satoru would get protective over his brothers and sister, but not the “don’t touch my sister’s hair” or “Are you the one bullying my brother, caus ei’m going to break your nose” kind. He is more calm and posed about this. He talks to his siblings and offer advices to help them, and sometimes alibis so they could avoid the problem. And if they can’t then he would be blunt with the one responsible.

As for fights, he would probably avoid it at all cost. He is not violent and would rather pout and be sad about a situation than get angry. He can’t stay mad at them very long though, for Satoru to hate one of his sibling, they must have done something very, very bad. (Like making Shouto or Momo very sad).

So now that you get the basic of this, here is, WHAT I THINK, would be Satoru’s relationship with each kid :

Mimi : Probably the sibling he gets along the best, since they are both calm and composed. They both like reading and are maternal.

Haku : Same as Fujiko and Hajime, i don’t know much about him. But i think that Satoru would be happy to hang out with him and Aoyama. Probably talk about fashion (but since Satoru has a fashion sense as developped as Edward Elric i doubt he would be good advice in this area). He would probably amused by Haku’s behaviour and wonder where it comes from. Satoru would probably be uper warry of him the first day Haku goes to school because he would be worried his little brother to be bullied. >>

Hajime : I don’t know much about Hajime, but he looks like a boy version of Momo, always happy and cheerful and supportive. I think Satoru would like him very much and be a bit tired by his happy-vibes but yet very moved by the kid. You know i kind of see a scene like “We’re going to do this : YEAH!” and Satoru being the dead–voiced kid in the background repeating “yeeeeeeeeeeah” like he is being dragged into this against his will, when it’s clearly not the case.

Fujiko : Fujiko would make Satoru so stupid, like, i think he would be so perplexed. She has Shouto’s face and tired stare. They would definitely give a contest about who looks the most annoyed and tired. I think he would pinch her cheek a lot as a baby and tries to make her smile / be surprised with his other sibling.

Mitsuka : I think his relationship with Mitsuka would be simple and compicated at the same time. I mean, they are both very sarcastic and like to complain…But on the other hand Mitsuka complains about her dad, and Satoru would kind of be like “Hey don’t talk about Papa like that” because, well, Shouto is his hero and savior after all. It’s hard to hear someone you like say bad things about your idol. But on the same time he would probably know, thanks to his power, that Mitsuka doesn’t think that. So he would probably be kind of lost like “i don’t like to hear that but on the same time i know it’s not true and crap what do i do” Tsun are not Satoru’s things xD

Hino : One of the sibling he likes to play a lot with. He likes te twin very much and could spend hours playing or talking with them about what they like / shows and heroes. He would play along with their “kid role play” like monster games or such. And he would buy him funny t-shirt with sentence like “I will Icy stare youl” for him.

Rei : One of the sibling he likes to play a lot with. He likes te twin very much and could spend hours playing or talking with them about what they like / shows and heroes. He would play along with their “kid role play” like monster games or such. And he would buy him funny t-shirt with sentence like “I’m hot as hell” for him.

Hana : Hana would be his little princess, and he would probably keep candies in his pocket just for her, because she is a glutton. Since she likes to eat, i think Satoru would try to teach her how to cook -bringing up Shouto and Momo in this new found family activity. If she has the quirk i gave her in the better care universe, then Hana would probably be Satoru’s first student, since he would help her mastering her quirk.

Kazu : I don’t know much about Kazu, but i think that Satoru would be very amused by the flirt vibes he gives off. He would be like “i have no idea from which one you got this, but you’re so damn good” Though Satoru would be very worried about Kazu’s heart state.

Here it is. Few it was quite long. I hope i answered your question. Now i need to go see the doctor. ^^ See you. Thank you again for your question Anon. It always makes me happy.

#ask #answer #anon #better care #Big todomomo family AU #sort of #art by littleroundpumpkin #reference #thank you for asking

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bringbackmaes14 · 4 years ago

Text

I found this “About Me” template here on Tumblr. I’ve reblogged it on my account if you wanna see the blank one.

1: Name - Gracie

2: Age - 19

3: 3 fears - The dark, heights, and spiders

4: 3 things I love - Ducks, math, and singing

5: 4 turn-ons - Being dependable, a good listener, funny, and artistic

6: 4 turn-offs - People who are messy, narcissistic, only care about looks/like me for my looks, and ignorant

7: My best friend - My sister, Caroline

8: Sexual Orientation - Panromantic Demisexual

9: My best first date - I saw Black Panther and got ice cream with my boyfriend

10: How tall I am - 5’8”

11: What do I miss? - South Carolina

12: What time was I born? - 7:57 a.m.

13: Favorite color? - Purple

14: Do I have a crush? - Do crushes on fictional characters count? If so, my current crush is Fatgum from My Hero Academia

15: Favorite quote? - “Surround yourself with people who are smarter than you, and don’t be afraid to be the dumbest one in the room because that gives you the most potential to learn.” - Markiplier

16: Favorite place? - Lexington High School

17: Favorite food? - Ambrosia

18: Do I use sarcasm? - Frequently

19: What am I listening to right now? - My cat purring

20: First thing I notice in a new person - Probably their hairstyle

21: Shoe size? - Women’s 13

22: Eye color? - Hazel

23: Hair color? Dark Brown

24: Favorite style of clothing? - Graphic Tees or Dresses; there is almost no in-between

25: Ever done a prank call? - Nope.

26: Meaning of my url - My URL (BringBackMaes14) is based on one of my favorite animes, Fullmetal Alchemist (Brotherhood is better you can fight me) and one of its characters, Maes Hughes. His death was the first anime character death I experienced, and he died in 1914 which is where the 14 comes from.

27: Favorite movie? - Robots (2005)

28: Favorite song? - There’s a Platypus Controlling Me from Phineas and Ferb

29: Favorite band? Panic! At the Disco

30: How I feel right now - A little bit tired, and my back hurts, but my mood is good

31: Someone I love - My sister, Caroline

32: My current relationship status - Single

33: My relationship with my parents - My relationship with my dad has always been bad. He was pretty abusive. My relationship with him is okay right now, now that I don’t see him but once a year. I’ve always been really close with my mom, and a big part of that is I’ve been disabled my whole life and so I’ve always needed her by my side, so we’re just together all the time. Things are a little rough right now though.

34: Favorite holiday? - Thanksgiving. It has all the same big meals and family gatherings as Christmas, but I don’t have seasonal depression then or gifts staring at me from under a tree for three weeks, driving me mad with anticipation.

35: Tattoos and piercings I have - My ears are pierced

36: Tattoos and piercings I want - I want a rubber duck tattoo, probably just a small one on my shoulder

37: The reason I joined Tumblr - To look at anime memes

38: Do my last ex and I hate each other? - No, things ended on good terms. We’re still friends and we talk occasionally

39: Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night” texts? - No

40: Have I ever kissed the last person I texted? - No

41: When did I last hold hands? - It’s been a few weeks

42: How long does it take me to get ready in the morning? - On a regular morning? Maybe 10 minutes. On mornings that I shower? About 45 minutes

43: Have you shaved your legs in the past three days? - I haven’t shaved my legs in 19 years

44: Where am I right now? - In my living room

45: If I were drunk and couldn’t stand, who would be taking care of me? - Probably one of my sisters

46: Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level? - I only turn songs way up when they have great bass

47: Do I live with my mom and/or dad? - I live with my mom, my two sisters, and my brother-in-law. It’s my older sister and brother-in-law’s house. I have a brother who still lives back in South Carolina where I’m from

48: Am I excited for anything? - I’ve got a virtual Halloween party I’m going to this week

49: Do I have someone of the opposite sex that I can tell everything to? - No

50: How often do I wear a fake smile? - Not very often. I wear my emotions pretty openly

51: When was the last time I hugged someone? - Last night I hugged my younger sister

52: What if the last person I kissed was kissing someone right in front of me? That’s none of my business really. We never actually dated and I don’t talk to her a lot anymore.

53: Is there someone I trust even though I shouldn’t? - Not that I can think of

54: What is something I disliked about today? - It rained while I was in the middle of going on a walk.

55: If I could meet anyone on Earth, who would it be? I’d like to meet J. Michael Tatum. He’s a voice actor in a lot of animes that I’ve watched and I really like his voice.

56: What do I think about the most? - Probably myself

57: What’s my strangest talent? - I wouldn’t call it talent but I can make a really disturbing horse-like noise.

58: Do I have any strange phobias? - I’m afraid of swingsets and trampolines

59: Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it? It doesn’t really matter to me. I don’t take a lot of pictures of myself, but it doesn’t have to do with not liking having my picture taken

60: What was the last lie I told? - “I’m not in a lot of pain.”

61: Do I prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online? - I actually prefer video chatting. It seems more personal.

62: Do I believe in ghosts? - Yes. I’ve seen my twin sister’s ghost several times in my life.

63: Do I believe in aliens? - Yes

64: Do I believe in magic? - No

65: Do I believe in luck? - Yes

66: What’s the weather like right now? It’s 60 degrees Fahrenheit and cloudy

67: What was the last book I read? Mother Knows Best: A Tale of the Old Witch Best by Serena Valentino

68: Do I like the smell of gasoline? - No

69: Do I have any nicknames? - Boo, Gracie Pie, Dot

70: What was the worst injury I ever had? - I broke my spine when I was 16

71: Do I spend money or save it? - I tend to spend it but I’m trying to save it right now

72: Can I touch my nose with my tongue? - Yes. I can also touch the bottom of my chin with my tongue

73: Is there anything pink within 10 feet of me? - Yes, there’s a pillowcase and a blanket

74: Favorite animal? - Panda Bear

75: What was I doing last night at 12 a.m.? - Sleeping

76: What do I think Satan’s last name is? - I don’t know, Smith? We’re probably all overthinking it and it’s something much more simple than Morningstar

77: What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it? - Flashy by GameBoyJones

78: How can you win my heart? - By not judging me based on my past and my disabilities

79: What would I want to be written on my tombstone? - Quacked to Death

80: What is my favorite word? - Feshnickit - the act of consuming alcohol until a point is reached where an individual is unable to function normally

81: My top 5 blogs on Tumblr - lady-raziel, just-shower-thoughts, plus-ultra-writings, drawing-prompt-s, and writing-prompt-s

82: If the whole world was listening right now, what would I say? - What that tongue do? (Idk I think it’d be really funny if the whole world just randomly heard that in their heads). If we’re talking like I’m on tv and broadcasting to the whole world and I’m not just telepathic/mind reading, then I’d probably say something about rights for women, colored people, and LGBTQ+ people

83: Do I have any relatives in jail? - Nope

84: Superpower of choice? - The power to affect probability. What’s the probability that I’ll ace this test? 100% What’s the probability that it will rain on my wedding day? 0% What’s the probability that my dad will shit his pants every time he hears the word “dragon”? 80%

85: What would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on? - Have you been handcuffed before and if yes, then why?

86: What is my current desktop picture? -

87: Had sex? - No

88: Bought condoms? - No

89: Been pregnant? - No

90: Failed a class? - Yes. I failed IT twice and Java Programming once.

91: Kissed a boy? - No

92: Kissed a girl? - Yes

93: Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain? - No

94: Had a job? - It wasn’t an actual paid job, but I worked as a student aid in my school’s library in my senior year of high school.

95: Left the house without my wallet? - Yes

96: Bullied someone on the internet? - I’ve bullied people in real life, but not on the internet.

97: Had sex in public? - No

98: Played on a sports team? - I played basketball with a church league for 6 years

99: Smoked weed? - No

100: Done drugs? - I take prescription drugs for my disabilities, but I’ve never “done” drugs, no.

101: Smoked cigarettes? - No

102: Drank alcohol? - No

103: Am I a vegan/vegetarian? - No

104: Been overweight? - I currently am

105: Been underweight? - No

106: Been to a wedding? - I’ve been to 4 weddings

107: Been on the computer for 5 hours straight? - Yes

108: Watched TV for 5 hours straight? - Yes

109: Been outside my home country? - No

110: Gotten my heart broken? - Yes, but not in a “I got dumped or turned down” kind of way. Someone close to me told me something really devastating.

111: Been to a professional sports game? - I once went to a Clemson Tigers vs University of South Carolina Gamecocks game, which was a pretty big game for South Carolina

112: Broken a bone? - I broke my L5 vertebrae

113: Cut myself? - Never on purpose, but yes. I sliced open my thumb knuckle once and had to get 3 stitches.

114: Been to prom? - I threw my own prom at home my junior year of high school because my school’s actual prom was 3 days after my spinal surgery so I wouldn’t have been able to go. I went to my school’s prom the year after and the theme was Emerald City from The Wizard of Oz

115: Been on an airplane? - No

116: Flown by helicopter? - No

117: What concerts have I been to? - I once went to a concert at my church for a Christian barbershop quartet called Soul’d Out

118: Had a crush on someone of the same sex? - Yes

119: Learned another language? - I took Spanish classes for 3 years and French for 6 years

120: Worn makeup? - I’ve worn makeup before for stage performances but I don’t like to wear it regularly. Every once in awhile I’ll wear some mascara.

121: Lost my virginity before I was 18? - No

122: Had oral sex? - No

123: Dyed my hair? - I’ve dyed my hair purple, and blue. I liked it better purple.

124: Voted in a presidential election? Voting day for the 2020 election is in 8 days, and it’s the 1st presidential election I’ll be old enough to vote in, but I don’t think I’m going to vote.

125: Rode in an ambulance? - Several times. I had a lot of seizures when I was a little kid. My longest one lasted at least 2 hours.

126: Had surgery? - I’ve had 2 major surgeries: I had my gallbladder removed and I had a spinal surgery to fix my broken vertebrae where they screwed 3 of my vertebrae together and used part of my hip to make a bone graft to cover it.

127: Met someone famous? - Unless the guys from Soul’d Out count, I don’t think so.

128: Stalked someone on a social network? - Definitely not (and if I had, I probably wouldn’t tell you guys)

129: Peed outside? - Do Porta Potties count?

130: Been fishing? - Yes. I went once when I was maybe 8 years old, and I was the only one of my siblings to catch a fish. I caught it by the eye socket though and its eye fell out. I’m still not sure exactly how that happened.

131: Helped with charity? - Yes. I don’t remember what the charity was called, but I worked in a warehouse once to collect shoes for homeless shelters

132: Been rejected by a crush? - Yes, but it was when I was 11 so I don’t know if that really counts

133: Broken a mirror? - No, but I’ve punched a hole in a wall before

134: What do I want for my birthday/Christmas? - The number one thing on my list is some Artemis Drawing Figurines. They have adjustable and interchangeable hands, and they come in both male and female shapes.

#about me #this is about me #all about me #what do you want to know #any additional questions

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tcm--holland · 7 years ago

Text

comic // peter parker

summary: peter parker meets you and is given a new vision of what girls can be when he sees that you fearlessly stand for what you believe in and that you don’t sit around waiting for your prince charming. mild dc universe references.

word count: about 2k

a/n: hey! wrote this lil thing for 4 hours today! unedited as per usual. i just went to see Wonder Woman for the first time recently and got a little inspired. warning for WW spoilers and mild profanity. not very angsty or anything but i wanted to switch up that trope of a girl being hopelessly in love with this cool ass guy! and I thought it’d be cute to see him fuss over little things she does, just like the usual trope but switched around. also i needed a break bc writing simple took a lot lot of work lol love you guys!! ok this is getting long so enjoy this fic and give me feedback <333

masterlist

__________________________

“Hey, Penis Parker!” Flash yells at the top of his lungs as he hits the gas and speeds past Peter.

Sighing, Peter turns away. He knows Ned would want him to do something about the prick, but he knows better than that. It’s not as if it doesn’t get infuriating sometimes, because it fricking does. But he can’t do anything but keep letting Flash punch him, trying to get a reaction.

Sometimes, he just wants to hit back. And by “hit back”, he means metaphorically of course. He just wants to say, Here’s your reaction, Flash. And then totally roast him. He thinks that would be the coolest thing ever, but pissing off a dude like him is dangerous territory that Peter just doesn’t want to get into.

Peter picks up the earbuds hanging from the top of his sweater to slide them into his ears when he hears low laughter. He glances up and turns to see who it was. He frowns a little when he sees no one, turning back to find you on the bench nearby. He jumps a little, surprised.

You’re sitting with your legs crossed and a book held in front of you. Correction, not just any book. A comic book, Wonder Woman. By the looks of the cover, it dates to just after the bronze age of comic books, late 80s maybe. Who are you? You look up to see Peter, his expression a synthesis of confusion, curiosity, and excitement. Gently, you close the comic and set it beside you. He’s glad you’re being so careful with it, because that thing looks like it might just fall apart.

His expression turns a little serious. You say, “Oh, sorry. Was I not supposed to laugh? Flash hardly seems threatening to me, that’s all.” A few seconds of silence pass. You look away, and then back at him. “So…do you speak, or…?”

“Uh, sorry. I just, um...Flash isn’t threatening. To me, that is. So...just to set that, like, straight…” Peter fumbles over his words, his eyes still on you.

“Really? Then why don’t you do anything about him? I hope you’re not waiting for Spider-Man to swoop in and punch him or anything.”

“I’m not. I think Spider-Man has better things to do, like beating up actual bad guys and hoping to be apart of the Avengers,” Peter says, sounding a little too annoyed. He quickly tries to take a step back, though. “Uh, I mean, that’s what I’d guess. Not that I would really know, though.”

You raise your eyebrows and tilt your head to the side slightly. “Please, you’re not fooling anyone.”

His eyes widen, and he slides his hands into his pockets to try and look more casual about it. “W-What are you talking about?” How could you know? There’s no way you know anything if he’s never even seen you, right? Maybe he should tell Mr. Stark about this. Oh, who is he kidding? He can’t lean on Mr. Stark forever, he has to deal with his own problems here. He has to prove to him that he can be an Avenger.

“You know what I’m talking about. You’re a fanboy for Spider-Man. Head over heels, I’d say. You couldn’t be more obvious.” Peter almost breathes a sigh of relief, his tension gradually draining away.

But this doesn’t stop a mad blush from flushing his cheeks and ears. “I dunno, I just think Spider-Man is cool, that’s all. I’m not crazy over it or anything.”

“The body betrays the mind.” You give him a lopsided smile, which practically melts him inside. It makes him want to make you laugh, just to see how it would look. “It’s okay, I don’t really care. But between you and me, I think Spider-Man isn’t as impressive as people make him out to be.”

“Why not?” Peter shoots back almost immediately, getting a little defensive.

“I mean, he can cling to walls and ceilings and can shoot a few webs. Big deal. Come back to me when he turns out to be an Amazonian princess that still stands today as a feminist icon. Or when he uses his powers to beat up the Axis Powers in World War Two. So tell me he’s amazing when he saves the world. Then he’ll be a hero worth regarding.” He watches you, seeing your passion for Wonder Woman practically radiate off of you. There’s a glint in your eyes, and for a second, Peter’s almost convinced.

Almost. “That’s not a fair comparison. Wonder Woman spent her whole life training for the threat that she overcame. Antiope was, like, this crazy good general! So she had basically the best training she could receive until she had to go and kill Ares in the war. Not to mention, she’s a goddess! How can you blame a kid like Spider-Man, who just started out, for not being like her?” And just like that, Peter is caught. His cheeks flame up again as he curses himself internally for not being able to handle a hit on his pride. You’re better than that, dude.

You look genuinely surprised at all of this. Slowly, you start laughing. It’s a joyful, sweet sound that lights up your whole face. Peter looks like he might just faint, both out of embarrassment and from seeing you laugh.

“Well, well. Looks like I might not be the only Wonder Woman stan around here,” you grin playfully and straighten out your legs. “But I have a question for you. How do you know that Spider-Man is a kid?”

Peter is in stunned silence at first, but he quickly scraps together a lie to save himself from exposure. “I-I...saw pictures, and his, uh, physique isn’t...one that you’d see on a grown man.”

“He should call himself Spider-Boy, then,” you snort.

Don’t say anything, Peter. Just laugh and be done with it, don’t do anything stup- “Just ‘cause he’s young doesn’t mean he’s not manly!”

You look slightly taken aback. “Okay, okay, sorry for insulting your golden boy. But anyway, I gotta go home.” You open up your backpack and slide in the Wonder Woman comic. Before you close it, you pull out another comic and hand it to Peter.

“...Justice League?” Peter asks questioningly.

“Yeah. Read that, and then you might not think the Avengers are so cool anymore. The Flash, Wonder Woman, Batman, Martian Manhunter, and the rest. And if you ever get the chance to meet the guy in the spider costume, give it to him too.” With that, you zip up your bag and slide it onto your shoulders, starting to turn away.

“Wait,” Peter calls out. You turn back and look at him. For just a moment, he gets lost in your E/C eyes. He doesn’t know what you’re doing to him, but he doesn’t want it to stop. “What’s your name?”

“Y/N. Y/N Y/L/N. What about you?”

What a beautiful name. But instead of voicing his thoughts, he just says, “Peter Parker.”

“Peter Parker. That’s a cute name. If you ever need someone to throw a punch at Flash Thompson, I’ll be there if your Spider-Man can’t.”

He grins a little, trying to play it cool even though you just called him ‘cute’. “Thanks, but I think I can handle myself.”

“No offense, but with what arms?” He glances down at his worn blue sweater, which is just baggy enough to hide the lean muscle underneath. He smiles modestly and shrugs.

“Exactly. See you later,” you give him one last smile and get going. He watches you walk, and then stop as you pull out earphones and untangle them before setting them in your ears. He wonders why his face is starting to hurt when he realizes he’s been grinning like an idiot the whole time.

That night, you occupy Peter’s thoughts for the longest time. He loves that you fight for your opinion, and what you believe. Because after all, it’s about what you believe. He reads the Justice League comic, which is practically a relic. It gets him thinking about the Avengers, and who he is as Spider-Man. In ways, the League is similar, but also radically different. He kind of wishes the characters could pop out of their stories and be apart of his world. Wouldn’t that be cool, having Batman on the Avengers? You were right, and now Peter wants to read more.

He still reminds himself of the distinction between fictional superheroes and the real ones. The Justice League doesn’t really exist, but the Avengers do. So he has to make the best of reality. Maybe he could even take a page or two out of the fictional characters’ books and become a better Spider-Man. Inspired by these thoughts, Peter falls asleep.

The next day is rushed. Peter practically darts from class to class, trying to get all of his work done so he can stay out longer as Spider-Man. On his way to his math class, he passes through the gym as a shortcut.

“Ninety-four, ninety-five, ninety-six…” A group of students chant, making him glance over. The whole class is crowded around a single student doing pushups. Her arms effortlessly move up and down, and he can’t help but admire her muscled biceps and forearms. He takes mental notes on her form. Looking a little closer, the face looks familiar.

Is that...you? You momentarily lift your head and give him your lopsided smile, your forehead pouring sweat. Peter stares in shock, and the only thing that jolts him back to reality is the late bell. He sprints out of the gym to get to class.

Was that really you? Of course it was, there’s no mistaking that smile that makes his heart pound. You really could throw Flash a mean punch. He flinches a little thinking about it, but now he has a whole new admiration for you and your strength. A girl with both a comic obsession and probably a six-pack? Peter’s heart flutters. With enough convincing, maybe he could get you to believe in Spider-Man, too.

After school, he sees you on your bench again. You’re in the same position, but this time, your hands hold a dated Superman comic. “How was Justice League?” You ask just as he opens his mouth to speak.

“It was really good, actually. I liked it.” He takes a seat beside you, suddenly nervous as you set the comic aside. You stare at him, and he gets even more nervous, not knowing what to do.

After a long silence, you say, “So...where is it?”

“Oh. Oh! Right, sorry.” He sees your patient, awkward smile and quickly digs around his backpack. “Uh, here.” He hands you the comic, hands shaking slightly. He stares at you, hopelessly lost in memorizing your features until you snap him out of it again.

“Peter, you realize that you have to let go of it for me to take it,” you say slowly.

“Right!” He quickly lets go and tries to give you a smile. He swallows, trying to calm himself down.

You smile back. “So you liked it. I thought you would. Do you want to read more?”

Peter grins a little. “That would be awesome. Oh yeah, I saw what you did in the gym today.”

“I know. Impressed?” You grin back.

“Not embarrassed to admit that I am,” Peter nods, starting to break free of his anxious shell as he sets an arm around the bench.

“Good. There are too many guys out there that take it as a challenge to their masculinity and get worked up over it.”

“Yeah, you’re right. I don’t really like those kinds of people, honestly.”

For some reason, this makes you smile widely. You tuck away the comic and turn to look at him. “Hey, do you want to, like, go out sometime?” You ask directly.

Peter blushes for about the millionth time, but he looks a little confused. “Uh, we met like yesterday -”

“Do you like me?”

“W-What?” He stutters slightly.

“I said, do you like me?” You gaze at him intensely.

“I-I...yeah, I do,” he admits, thrown off guard once again.

“Pete, there’s no time like the present. I’m not exactly the kind of person who waits for things to happen. I’m the one who goes out and does them. So do you want to go out or not?”

Peter realizes you’ve nicknamed him and is internally fanboying. There are so many things he admires about you right now. Your initiative, your straight-forward and non-hesitant manner. You’re so...strong. You’re what he aspires to be as a person, but instead he’s shy and can hardly speak in front of you.

“Yeah, I do,” he finally responds, blinking a few times.

You give him that crooked smile that he likes so much, nodding. Things are about to get a lot more interesting for Peter Parker.

__________________

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