#— spilled ink. *✲; ( reply. )

[inkskinned]

one of the things that's the most fucking frustrating for me about arguing with climate change deniers is the sheer fucking scope of how much it matters. sweating in my father's car, thinking about how it's the "hottest summer so far," every summer. and there's this deep, roiling rage that comes over me, every time.

the stakes are wrong, is the thing. that's part of what makes it not an actual debate: the other side isn't coming to the table with anything to fucking lose.

like okay. i am obviously pro gun control. but there is a basic human part of me that can understand and empathize with someone who says, "i'm worried that would lead to the law-abiding citizens being punished while criminals now essentially have a superpower." i don't agree, but i can tell the stakes for them are also very high.

but let's say the science is wrong and i'm wrong and the visible reality is wrong and every climate disaster refugee is wrong. let's say you're right, humans aren't causing it or it's not happening or whatever else. let's just say that, for fun.

so we spend hundreds of millions of dollars making the earth cleaner, and then it turns out we didn't need to do that. oops! we cleaned the earth. our children grow up with skies full of more butterflies and bees. lawns are taken over with rich local biodiversity. we don't cry over our electric bills anymore. and, if you're staunchly capitalist and i need to speak ROI with you - we've created so many jobs in developing sectors and we have exciting new investment opportunities.

i am reminded of kodak, and how they did not make "the switch" to digital photography; how within 20 years kodak was no longer a household brand. do we, as a nation, feel comfortable watching as the world makes "the switch" while we ride the laurels of oil? this boggles me. i have heard so much propaganda about how america cannot "fall behind" other countries, but in this crucial sector - the one that could actually influence our own monopolies - suddenly we turn the other cheek. but maybe you're right! maybe it will collapse like just another silicone valley dream. but isn't that the crux of capitalism? that some economies will peter out eventually?

but let's say you're right, and i'm wrong, and we stopped fracking for no good reason. that they re-seed quarries. that we tear down unused corporate-owned buildings or at least repurpose them for communities. that we make an effort, and that effort doesn't really help. what happens then? what are the stakes. what have we lost, and what have we gained?

sometimes we take our cars through a car wash and then later, it rains. "oh," we laugh to ourselves. we gripe about it over coffee with our coworkers. what a shame! but we are also aware: the car is cleaner. is that what you are worried about? that you'll make the effort but things will resolve naturally? that it will just be "a waste"?

and what i'm right. what if we're already seeing people lose their houses and their lives. what if it is happening everywhere, not just in coastal towns or equatorial countries you don't care about. what if i'm right and you're wrong but you're yelling and rich and powerful. so we ignore all of the bellwethers and all of the indicators and all of the sirens. what if we say - well, if it happens, it's fate.

nevermind. you wouldn't even wear a mask, anyway. i know what happens when you see disaster. you think the disaster will flinch if you just shout louder. that you can toss enough lives into the storm for the storm to recognize your sacrifice and balk. you argue because it feels good to stand up against "the liberals" even when the situation should not be political. you are busy crying for jesus with a bullhorn while i am trying to usher people into a shelter. you've already locked the doors, even on the church.

the stakes are skewed. you think this is some intellectual "debate" to win, some funny banter. you fuel up your huge unmuddied truck and say suck it to every citizen of that shitbird state california. serves them right for voting blue!

and the rest of us are terrified of the entire fucking environment collapsing.

[starsnsonnets]

i can help you

to give you advice

i can help you

to give you clear sight

i can do anything you want

i can be everything you got

but if you try

to help me fly

you’ll fall into my pit

a pit that makes you die

you might cry

if you fall in my pit

just stay on land

take my word

when i say that “im fine”

dont push me hard

you’ll pay the fee

i will fall

and ill take you with me

taglist: @horsesarenotdeer @im-on-crack-send-help @the-slowest-turtle @book-girl4eva @hijabi-flavored-nerd

[revasserium]

Do you ever feel like writing Fandom content is a waste? 😭 I started with writing original content but I fell into writing Fandom and fic works years ago. At first I was like cool with it because I saw it as practice but I made ocs for the fandoms and I'm invested lol now I've been feeling like I should be putting this time and energy into original things. I know I won't ever get published but like still 🤣

hmmm i think to a certain extent, it depends on what your "end goal" is -- but even then, i don't think it's a "waste". writing is one of those things that you have to practice to be "good" at (like most things), but it also requires a degree of life experience. and not to say that you can't produce good writing when you're younger (there are lots of super talented young authors out there!) but for the most part, it's always more "true to form" if you write based on things you've experienced. and those experiences tend to only come with time.

i think the cool thing about producing for fandom is that it does several things at once: it hopefully gives you joy (if writing is a hobby of yours and the fandom is one that you like), it allows you to try your hand a bunch of different writing styles without any kind of "personal commitment" to a style, and it gives you super valuable practice.

if you enjoy writing for fandoms and ocs, then i don't think it's a waste of time at all. any time spent being happy or joyous in this life is time well spent. and there's many many proper scientific research papers out that there prove your brain and body need this kind of "down time" to indulge in the things you love, that have no sort of monetary-tie.

even IF your end goal is to be published someday, there's nothing to say that one of the oc's you've created now can't make it into original work later. or that a storyline you've been thinking through and building out can't become the plotline to your debut novel. i think the super cool thing about "the arts" as a genre is that aging is actually seen as a great benefactor. because the older you are, the more you do it, the ultimately better you'll get. because unlike sports where you're trying to do the thing before your body can't anymore, your mind continues to grow and get better as you age. and so does your writing.

as someone who writes for pleasure, and at one point in time was a paid writer (that was my full time job), i can tell you that it definitely changes things when you start to get paid for it. it takes some of that enjoyment out of it. and it felt so nice to write for myself and for fandom again after leaving writing as a temporary career.

and you shouldn't be so sure you'll never get published! look at all those wattpad fanfics that get turned into movie-deals!!! do i think they have the best writing ever? no! but does it prove that regardless of what kind of writing you do, if you're able to harness an audience, people are bound to take note? yes! and even if, again, you aren't able to get yourself a netflix movie deal with the fanfic you write, the community you build and the happiness it gives you is i think more important! it'll make whatever your actual money-job is more bearable :) it def does that for me!

tl;dr -- just bc it's not making you money, doesn't mean it's not important! in fact, most of the time, the stuff that you do for yourself and your friends, for your fandom, for the things that you love are the things that make life worth living! the things that make you you. so keep at it!!!! <3 and if you DO want to publish a novel someday, it's never ever too late to start. you'll have just as much of a leg up on the writing part, because you've been practicing while writing for fandom too! :)

[ethereal-evei]

an accidental poem found in a Pinterest comment section 04/09/23 - image from myfriendsaredreaming on instagram

[existingillusion]

How's life? :)

I spent my teenage years on the edge of darkness, thinking I'd never find a way out. Then she came along, and for a while, it felt like I finally found my peace. I started dreaming of a life, a future. But when she left, she took every dream with her, leaving just this emptiness.

So when you ask how life is… I honestly don't know. Because without those dreams, without her, there isn’t really a life to speak of.

[redinkquill]

Witnessed wishes

You existed

Forlorn mind

Lost in time

[dg-fragments]

The beginning was signalled with sighting of a perhaps long-awaited crescent;

for myself though, it came more as a reliving surprise,

being submerged in the works of this world I have been unable to focus,

on what matters much more, but then again,

this month, these few weeks present another opportunity,

to adjust one's priorities in this fleetingly short-lived life.

- DG (Ramadan'23)

[journey-to-the-attic]

list of stupid things ik has successfully gotten lucifer to say (ongoing)

either ik went to lucifer and said "can you please say/read this", or he's hung out with her too much and her silly language patterns have brushed off on him

"swag"

"working hard or hardly working?" (to lucifer's dismay, this one has now entered his list of default small talk lines)

"bideo games"

[most deadpan delivery possible] "yahoo"

"he got... gonched"

"fish fear me" (he refused to say the women bit, but it's arguably funnier that he only said the fish part)

the opening of my immortal. he did (begrudgingly) agree to read the whole first chapter, but he shut down after the first paragraph and didn't finish it

"and is levi epic gaming right now?" (he said this one on his own, entirely unprompted, because ik has said the words 'epic gaming' around him so much that it's accidentally entered his vocabulary)

[smol-stardust]

looking up at the sky and I see you

I burst into tears, a flood that will never reach you

it is ugly and loud and pathetic

but watch me turn my love for you into poetry

I'm sorry. it is the only thing I know how to do

I have never learned anything else and

I'm too lazy by now to want to

this is me in my barest form

a snivelling creature who wants to be held

darkness embodied who stares up in longing at the stars

who stares up in longing at you.

Sage, get over here so I can… *GLOMPS and doesn’t let go*

No need to change, for in rawness,

A beauty profound, a unique mind.

I accept your essence, unrefined,

in your rawest, most genuine state,

You're held in the cosmos' embrace.

So let the tears fall, let the darkness yearn,

For in your rawness,

acceptance blooms,

You're cherished, just as you are.

[inkovert]

Spilled Ink Session 1 discussion -continued

So I just read @freedominique's response to the session 1 prompt and I think you made a ton of good points that I want to discuss further. The post was getting long already so I figured I'd make a fresh post to discuss and reblog to our hearts content.

I'm just going to copy paste some points you put in bold and address them one by one to make this a bit more organized.

The film industry's promise of revenue and attention potentially encourages writers to undermine and neglect exploring the strengths of their own medium to try to better fit the demands of the silver screen.

Nothing to add to this; this was my exact point about the harm of the pipeline. Not necessarily that it exists, but that it could inevitably have negative consequences for the future of literature. My friend just told me something interesting the other day about how Reese Witherspoon gets the future rights to turn your book into a movie or TV show if it ends up as one of her Book Club picks (ofc with the author's agreement). Now, as you've alluded to, it's unlikely that the books she chooses aren't at least of decent quality (though that can be its own separate debate). It seems, as far as I can tell, that Reese is interested in putting forward strong, well-written stories told by female authors and wouldn't choose a book that wasn't (to her) well crafted and could stand on it's own. But I'm more so pointing out this paradigm of the fact that authors may cater to this business model to the detriment of their own medium. Because Reese is making billions off doing this. So what happens when that faceless greedy capitalist figure sees how profitable this pipeline is and doesn't necessarily have the same care or consideration for selecting strong, well-crafted stories? The film industry is simply concerned with whatever sells.

I'm not concerned that novels which resort to stage-direction style writing (to win over the movie industry) will take over the market because I'm sceptical of their appeal

This is where I have to disagree a bit. And I will link this post as sort of a thesis statement of my point (that post also touches on something that will be discussed in a future session so I will try not to get too off the rails). Books of, arguably, not great quality are already being published at high frequency, gaining a ton of traction among readers and in turn being turned into tv shows/movies. Where I will strongly agree with you is that Hollywood isn't entirely to blame and I wasn't trying to imply that. As the post I linked above stated, and as you also stated, the problem starts in the publishing industry and with us. The types of books that are being pushed to the forefront in social media circles fuels what publishing industries choose to pump out to the masses for maximum profit and creates this vicious cycle. Add in another large capitalist corporation such as the film industry to that mix? It only worsens the issue. So my disagreement is simply that the appeal for these low quality stories is already live and present. And that's my worry. That more of these low quality books will be produced and pushed to the forefront for the benefit of these corporations (and the author - Witherspoon Book Club picks are said to sell 700% better than other fiction books and all of them have at least sold 10k copies), thereby diluting the nuanced, introspective craft that is literature.

At the end of the day, we, too, as writers/authors want to make money (I'm talking specifically about writers who want to pursue publishing, which I know isn't every writer's goal). And as much as we love writing and storytelling and bringing worlds and characters to life, when you decide to make writing your full-time job and enter the query trenches where you're being faced with rejection after rejection or poorly selling books, and you see books of objectively not good quality selling better and being embraced by the masses, with those authors getting tv/movie deals and being better compensated*...wouldn't it be tempting to just...pivot and shift your standards a bit to cater to what's working/will help you survive?

Now, I will say that my views on the issue are not all negative (as this whole discourse series is meant to point out - nothing is black and white!). I think @that-chibi-writer brought in a very interesting/refreshing perspective with their response that I really liked and I also alluded to it at the end of my first response. When done well (with a strong story to begin with by an author who cares about the process of storytelling, an author who is heavily involved in the tv show/film making process etc), a book-to-screen adaptation can be magnificent, not only enhancing the way readers experience the story but also "deepen[ing] the actual content of the film industry by making the content richer and more diverse in a lot of different ways." (@that-chibi-writer). Dominique, I think it makes total sense for you to pursue making your book a film/tv show. You don't even have to justify doing that because I'm not making a case that doing so is inherently bad. I know you'd prioritize honoring the medium of literature first over catering to a business, and as you said you want to deepen the reader's experience of your story by not limiting it to just a print format/medium. If that were the motive of every author, I wouldn't have an issue. My issue just stems from the industry (publishing, film, whatever) exploiting the vulnerability of authors (especially debut authors) and making them think they have to write their story a certain way to survive as an author. I just hate that mindset being pumped into the literary scene, and given the current dumpster fire that is the gateway to publishing at the moment (book banning, the booktokification of books etc), I just worry about the effects that may manifest years from now.

*I don't pretend to know what the actual numbers on all of this are. It could very well be that authors who have their shows made into some form of screen adaptation aren't well compensated for that. But they do receive something from it that, in my mind, is priceless - exposure. Gaining an audience, selling book copies, is becoming more and more about exposure and how you market yourself, and a tv show/film is helping you do that on a much larger scale than your own personal social media account.

[ggeneralgrunt]

A GOD-CREATED MAN

”God will send you trials, and they won’t be easy. He’s going to make a man out of you.”

yes, and this man will be one that is a vase hurriedly glued and taped back together after countless times of shattering as a clumsy example of a product made by the desperate and blind thought of “I can try again! It will be okay this time even if in the past it was not!” and he will find that he has been lying to himself.

[inkskinned]

"your pet doesn't love you; it just has learned that it will get treats if it acts a certain way. it can't understand you."

in between humans, i don't always speak the language either. love has always been hard for me. i don't trust it. i can't read it easily on people's faces - i'm usually trying to read past it; to the "other parts", the ones that make sense to me.

but my mom always offers me food as soon as i get through the door. my brother calls me at weird hours, just to be talking. my sister has a nightmare; asks me to please drive safe in the morning. i throw my friends random parties, just to celebrate something. she drives 45 minutes to spend 3 hours with me. amelia holds my hand while we both cross the street.

no, my dog and i don't have the same language. so what? this is not the same thing as communication. my dog is a good study in how trauma can heal - a rescue from the racetrack; i've been watching his personality develop slowly. in the last year, he's gotten so comfortable with me that he'll ask me to sit down on the grass so he can use my body as a seat. (it's important to note: he is huge. he squishes me. i don't complain. i find it lovely.)

love for us is also just endorphins and behavioral response. i'm a poet, the number of sad men that have tried to "teach me" how stupid it is to be a hopeless romantic is ... not a low one. i cannot count how many times someone has argued - it's all chemical stimulus - as if the fact of it makes it less magical. we're just electrical signals reading the universe! that's fucked up. that's so beautiful.

i find it hard to believe that in the spectrum of evolution we are the only species to feel like this - we already know that dogs and cats also have endorphins. why wouldn't they experience joy? love? companionship? in what world is it a new thing that i had to earn it? in every relationship, both individuals have to work to learn the language. i had to teach my dog what trust is. it's okay that it took time for him to learn it.

in the human world, when i love someone, it's hard for me to speak it. i write them poems or make them food or give them a cool rock i found on the beach.

i don't know how to tell goblin i love him, so i tell him through treats. through a new collar, fancy mattresses, a little bow on his leash. i tell him with long walks and petting him and sitting down on the wet ground so my 70 pound sharp noodle of a dog can prance on my thigh bones and take an awkward - if loving - seat.

"you taught your dog to love you" is kind of a cruel way to reframe what actually happened: i loved him so loudly, it skipped over language and species. the two of us just saying - oh! i have figured out a way to tell you that you make me happy.

[starsnsonnets]

i like the smell of gasoline

i dont look when i cross the street

i look under my bed hoping the monsters would come after me

i dont use hands on motorbikes

on roller coasters i close my eyes

i jump on bridges thinking it’ll fall down on me sometimes

i dont wear protective gear

i let bears come real near

i run real fast downhill even when the path aint clear

the threat of death comes after me

got addicted to its taste, you see?

i am an adrenaline junky

an adrenaline junky

love the feeling im gonna die

its a little hobby of mine

look the reaper in the eye

feelin grim and so divine

taglist: @horsesarenotdeer @im-on-crack-send-help @book-girl4evaaa @hijabi-flavored-nerd @violet92959

@thoughtlescat

[caramelshine]

"It's not anger what I have against you, it's pure disappointment"

[manavi-meera]

It's just me and my bollywood playlist at midnight against this bitch of a life🤷‍♀️

[esculentevil]

A few years ago, @thorinduil made a post asking “which songs make you think about Thorin, Thranduil and the Thorinduil pairing?” Last year, I answered them via reblog and then kept adding to it as I remembered/thought of more songs... Instead of reblogging THAT reblog for its one year anniversary, I decided to post my answers separately, here, and just update THIS list, instead, from now on. SO! Basically: My Thorinduil Playlist~ xD

"Walk Through the Fire" by Zayde Wolf feat. Ruelle

Also “Young and Beautiful” by Lana del Rey which I literally wrote a fic about.

And “Famous Last Words” by My Chemical Romance; perfect for survivor!Duil

Fuuu!!! “Poison” by Alice Cooper!!! Jive, how did I forget that one? Thank my mate, everyone; s/he reminded me rofl while we RPed

Rediscovered “Empire” by Shakira and think it’d fit them perfectly~

“Steady, as She Goes” by The Raconteurs has major wait too long vibes which, seriously, is 100% Thorinduil (especially since Thorin dies with his glue blood...); altho I’ll admit this one only occurred to me cuz it’s in my mate and I’s playlist and, like with Poison, we were talking about these two yet again lmfao and also this fanvideo which got me thinking of S,aSG halfway through it so... yea

AND “I Don't Care” by Apocalyptica ‘cause it fits/these both reminded me I love it

“I hate U, I love U” by Gnash ft. Olivia O'Brien: this is literally their love story

Perhaps strangely, I think “Sweet Dreams (Are Made Of This)” by Eurythmics, Annie Lennox, and Dave Stewart would work for them--especially Thorin

“Gingerbread Man” by Melanie Martinez; partly because of this video; but also because of the climax of the song not shown in that edit (which is a real shame cuz that was sort of the part that sealed it for me and got me to add it to this list): Thranduil is so the icing on Thorin and Thorin’s so the crumbs on Thranduil and they’re 100% loving hard, fighting, breaking, and eating each other into nothing

“I Want To **** You Like An Animal” by Nine Inch Nails; for obvious reasons

“I'd Do Anything For Love (But I Won't Do That)” by Meat Loaf because, legit, that’s just Thranduil on top of that cliff refusing to throw away his people/family

“Say Something” by A Great Big World because acesout is right

“Unsteady” by X Ambassadors because, after writing “Once I trusted/relied on/believed in you and you let me down” and “Once I had hopes that we could build something beautiful together but reality reminded me that I’m old and ugly and not good enough (for you) so I thought it best to let you go when I should’ve held you” in this and reading acesout’s post linked above and realizing it’s true... I just want to see/read them holding onto each other like this v.v They deserve it.

“Rude Boy” by Rihanna and probably also “Only Girl in the World” by her, too; actually, “We Found Love” ft. Calvin Harris and “Diamonds” and “Stay” ... Huh... Rihanna actually has a LOT of songs perfect for them... their whole love story...

“Enemies” by Lauv because the sentiment is so them.

“Fire” by Wang Yibo because this romance is ALL about playing with fire~

“Accidentally in Love” by Counting Crows cuz it’s literally what happened

“Not Another Song About Love” by Hollywood Ending because, seriously, everything about this song is them: they hate everything about each other while also needing everything about each other and wanting each other’s love ‘til it all runs out ‘cause they’re all that each other’ve been dreaming of~

“I'm Not Afraid” by Tommee Profitt ft. Wondra but mostly just the first part/verse; the rest of it strikes me more as Thranduil fighting depression/Sauron’s shadow while knowing he’s not only lost Thorin as a lover but gained him as an enemy...

“Locked Away” by R. City ft. Adam Levine cuz it’s literally Thorin losing it all--from mountain to crown to gold--and yet not getting that Thranduil locking him up IS him sticking with him, by his side, and grounding him through the goldlust

“Baby Love” by The Supremes because Mizugetsu on YT is a folking genius and I always liked this song anyway--also, it just really fits them rofl and their story

“Teeth” by 5 Seconds of Summer: the “dangerous beauty/love to hate” vibes just work and the simp!Thorin feels--@lady-astria and I were just talking about this!

“Always” by Saliva because there’s nothing unThorin[duil] about it; it’s all them (especially, I think, from Thorin’s POV post-Smaug straight up to BotFA)

“Kiss from a Rose” by Seal because “my power, my pleasure, my shame” period. But also it really does sound like Thorin singing about Thranduil, his lit rose.

"Let Her Go” by Passenger; because sometimes you only know you love him when you turn away from him and his burning home to protect your own... or when you’re dying with a hole in your chest and finally UNDERSTAND WHY your One did that and finally stop hating him for it... because you never did.

“Unconditionally” by Katy Perry because it sounds like Thorin (mostly) and Thranduil grappling with their surprisingly deep love for each other as well as their inability to trust each other after all the betrayals they’ve suffered through; this song is what I think would happen if Thorin just admitted Thranduil was right and a good king for not asking his people to die for the dwarves that ignored him—and if Thorin’s love for Thranduil were stronger than his need to be number 1 or to horde and covet literally everything including Thranduil’s love and attention.

“A Sky Full Of Stars” by Coldplay because, in the canon, Thorin IS this to Duil and Thranduil WAS this to Thorin and every night he sees him there still

“Gravity” by Sara Bareilles; because something always brings them back together—it never takes too long—and they’re always there for each other... even when they’re gone

“A Thousand Years” by Christina Perri because it’s literally reincarnated!Thorin with Never-Sailed!Thranduil forever waiting for his love(s)’s return~

“Broken” by Lifehouse because Thranduil’s still holding post-canon; and, truly, they were both holding onto each other before all that even if they won’t admit it