#ུ✷ tell that devil to take you back. ︴ WYNONNA EARP.

[iccarian]

“ that isn’t ‘just a scratch’. ” ― @mcmorare.

❝ whatever, it doesn't matter. i just have to -- ❞ oh. okay, maybe the new kid has a point. it's a hell of a lot worse than she was hoping for. wynonna tries to take a breath and it hitches on the stabbing pain on her left side, expression contorting with a grimace as she reaches to plant her palm on a post of the fence in an effort to maintain her balance. pain. it's just pain. and a lot more blood than she's normally comfortable with, frankly. swallowing, sweaty grip on peacemaker is readjusted with a desperate, steely determination. doesn't matter. she can't stop here.

the taste of iron washes over her tongue when she licks her lips and squeezes her eyes shut for a heartbeat, another, before returning her gaze to katrina; the welling dam of pain turns them watercolor, but no softer. ❝ fine. listen, i couldn't care less about your black badge regulations right now, just ―― do what you can to help me with this. ❞ her breath comes heavy from her nostrils, each word cut from the barrel of a gun. anything to get her there, to her family. ❝ okay? ❞

[thelaurenshippen]

this month's mixtape is Desperate Hollow! I write notes to all of my playlists and this month, I also wrote a ton about the process of working on this story, so if y'all are interested in that too, I'm happy to post that writing here! just let me know. but for now, music and rivals-to-friend-to-enemies-to-lovers feelings.

here are the basics that you need to know: Tex Bullock (a name he chose at 11) joined the notorious Barlowe Boys after he was orphaned at 8 years old, with Barlowe taking him under his wing. Sawyer Watson was similarly orphaned years later and fell in with the gang when he and Tex were both 14. they did not like each other at first. but fast forward thirteen years and they've become the best of friends, with feelings beyond friendship buried in both their hearts, when a confrontation with Barlowe leads to Sawyer shooting Tex in the chest and leaving him for dead. 

fast forward again, seven years this time, and Sawyer has been living in a dead-end town (Desperate Hollow, of course) when who should roll into town, horseless and clearly running from something, but Tex. 

that is, more or less, everything you need to know that happens in the first few chapters. okay, let's get into it: 

1. "Bottom of the River" - Delta Rae

This playlist was started so long ago, in 2019, and since then I've honed so much about the story, even though I haven't touched this playlist. As a result, a lot of the songs are seeking a vibe that I hadn't quite clicked into - this is definitely a vibe song. It sounds to me like dragging yourself across dusty plains, hoping that salvation will come find you soon, either in the sight of civilization or in death. Essentially: where Tex begins.

2. "Born This Way" - Bear and a Banjo

Though both Sawyer and Tex have their own playlists (which I'll be sharing over the next two months) as well as several different ship mixes, there are certain songs that are more one or the other on this playlist. Sawyer's life before joining the Barlowe Boys was fairly peaceful - as a Black man living in Montana, he didn't exactly have it easy, but he had parents who loved each other and loved him. That sense of family is something he never quite gets back with the gang.

What happened to my freedom, separated my family/Bringing me to the foreign place/Now I'm focused on surviving in the midst of evil/Don't think it's ever gonna be the same

Fun fact! This song is actually from a fiction podcast about a fictional musical collaboration. 

3. "Devil's Backbone" - The Civil Wars

Meanwhile, Tex was raised by a criminal father, his mother having died when he was eighteen months old. So when Barlowe found him and showed him the kind of affection and guidance his father never did, it was easy for Tex to fall into line on the criminality side. Sawyer is a lot more moral than Tex in a lot of ways - he's never killed anyone, whereas Tex has earned himself a pretty fearsome reputation. Sawyer doesn't always approve of what Tex does but...that doesn't mean he doesn't have a weakness for him all the same. 

Don't care if he's guilty, don't care if he's not/He's good and he's bad and he's all that I've got

Also, Sawyer was raised in the church whereas Tex's dad was probably? Irish Catholic but I don't think he ever talked about God with Tex. Neither one of them is very religious anymore, but I love the line Oh Lord, oh Lord, what do I do?/I've fallen for someone who's nothing like you

4. "Tell That Devil" - Jill Andrews

I found this song because it's the theme for  Wynonna Earp, a delightful supernatural Western with lots of queerness. 

I gave you all I got to give/I know that ain't no way to live/so I told that devil to take you back - so much of the conflict between Tex and Sawyer is about loyalty, to each other and to Barlowe. I think this could work in multiple ways--either one of them saying it to Barlowe, or Sawyer saying it to Tex. 

5. "I'm a Wanted Man" - Royal Deluxe

This is a Tex song - both how the world sees him and the way he sees himself. 

I would kill again to keep from doing time is more or less a plot point, and you should never ever trust my kind is a central conflict within him. 

If you asked me to change/I don't know if I can/I'll always be who I am

Royal Deluxe is all over these playlists - they make "outlaw rock" which in my view, is essentially cowboy-outlaw roleplaying fanfic. I'm so glad it exists. 

6. "I'm Bad" - The Last Vegas

More of a vibe song, but I do think this is a little bit how Tex sees himself sometimes. He doesn't relish violence, doesn't actually really want to be an outlaw, but it's pretty much all he's ever known -- this is my note from 2019 or whenever I first wrote the notes and I don't have much to add to it (other than to say I'm not sure Tex doesn't relish violence. It's complicated. I did tell you the story got darker). Hindsight being 20/20, if I were to remake these playlists now, this would go on the Barlowe playlist. But this and the Tex and Sawyer playlists have been so baked for so long, I can't conceive of any other song placement. 

7. "Raise Hell" - Brandi Carlile 

If Tex has an anthem this is it. For some reason, I didn't end up putting it on his personal playlist, because I think it fits the ~vibes~ better.

I've been down with a broken heart/Since the day I learned to speak/The devil gave me a crooked start/When he gave me crooked feet - This is sort of the companion to "Born This Way". Tex's father took a lot more shape since I wrote this initial note, but it applies even more now. Tex was never going to walk straight (dual meaning intended). 

I dug a hole inside my heart/To put you in your grave/At this point it was you or me/And mama didn't raise no slave/You took my face in both your hands/And looked me in the eye/And I went down with such a force/That in your grave I lie - I was coy with my notes on these lyrics previously, but it does work on multiple levels - Tex and Sawyer both have to bury each other in their hearts after that deadly confrontation and, for seven years, Sawyer thinks he put Tex in his actual grave. Which, from his perspective, might as well be his own grave for as much as he wants to exist in a world without Tex. Anyway, yeah, graves are a thing in the book. 

8. "Dangerous" - Royal Deluxe

Mostly a vibes song - I like to think of this as a theme song of sorts, for when Sawyer and Tex were in their early twenties, perfect partners, taking the West by storm and becoming figures of legend. 

9. "Blood on My Name" - The Brothers Bright

As I said, Sawyer is the less violent of the two, doesn't like being an outlaw at all really but that doesn't mean he isn't deadly. Tex wears his anger like a well-worn coat, but Sawyer's rage is buried deep.

Yes, Sawyer's rage is buried deep, but it's also different from Tex's - it's a simplification, but Tex spends most of his life angry at himself, Sawyer spends that time angry at the world. After Sawyer shoots Tex, those positions switch. Tex is the one who has blood all over his reputation, his name, but Sawyer's one kill (so he thinks) haunts him in a way killing never bothered Tex. 

There's a reckoning a-coming/And it burns beyond the grave/With lead inside my belly/'Cause my soul has lost its way/Oh, Lazarus, how did your debts get paid? - brain goes brrrrr at this re: Sawyer, but I've got to save some thoughts for the actual book. 

10. "Gun in My Hand" - Dorothy

Why did love put a gun in my hand...Why did love put a knife in my heart - I mean, that really says it all.

All the talk of redemption, revenge, opening up scars...delicious. 

Was it for the thrill of pushin' my hope to the edge - if I think about this too long I'll spontaneously combust. 

11. "Desperado" - Rihanna*

Okay, okay, okay - this is the keystone song of both this playlist and their relationship. I love it. It's modern and cool but has that old West swag and, okay, look, this might be a stretch, but "Desperado" sort of sounds like "Desperate Hollow" said with a drawl and GAH. I love this song.

I'm not tryna go against you/Actually, I'm going withcha/Gotta get up out of here and/You ain't leaving me behind/I know you won't, 'cause we share common interests/You need me, there ain't no leaving me behind - the premise of this story initially really hinged on one fact: that Tex and Sawyer needed each other to get out of Desperate Hollow.

There ain't nothing here for me anymore/But I don't wanna be alone - I have so much to say about this lyric but I don't think I can without writing an essay that gives away the whole book, so I'll shut up.

If you want we could runaways/running from any sight of love - again, if I speak--

12. "Heaven and Back" - Emily West

I don't know, I just wanted to end this playlist on a kinda romantic song! this is one of those songs that just feels like them and I can't describe why.

A big reason this song is on the playlist is that, back in 2019, I was building a pitch for a big studio that ended up going nowhere, but the exec I was working with sent me this song at the same moment I was putting the final touches on this playlist and it just clicked in my brain. 

I want you to be my man/I want you to be more than a friend/I dare you to break our plans

[freedom-of-writing]

Forever my wife

Just my take on how the WayHaught wedding could’ve turned out. I wrote this before the airing of episode 4x12, so expect it to be different. 

It’s here. Their weeding day has finally arrived. Nicole has been smiling her brightest smile all morning. She can’t believe she is finally getting married to the love of her life, her Angel, the Guardian of her heart. Waverly Earp. Her wife. Wow... that sounds so good.

She is all dressed up and almost ready for the ceremony, thanks to Rachel. She is wearing a beautiful maroon suit with a very simple and natural-looking makeup. It was Rachel’s idea, and she absolutely loves the result. As for Waverly, she has Wynonna to help her get ready. Obviously. Part of Nicole wishes she could just peek at them, sure they must be having a lot of fun right now. But she and Waverly agreed their wedding looks should be a surprise, so she is getting ready in the barn, while Waverly is in their room in the Homestead.

“Alright, there you go!” Rachel exclaims when she’s done with Nicole’s hair. “What do you think?”

Rachel curled her beautiful red hair, and clipped it backwards on one side, so that it is falling nicely on her right shoulder.

“Wow...” Nicole stares in awe at her figure in the mirror.

“I know. I’m pretty proud of my work too.” Rachel says with a proud smirk.

Nicole chuckles lightly at that, and then she turns to face her. “Thank you.”

Rachel smiles brightly at her, moving her hand up to fix a lock of Nicole’s hair. “I’m... I’m gonna go check on Waves. See if Wynonna needs any help...”

“Okay.”

When Rachel leaves, Nicole moves to sit on Wynonna’s bed. Closing her eyes, she tries to recall all of the milestones that led them here. Their first meeting at Shorty’s... Waverly Earp smiling at her from her front porch... her heart shattering when Waverly told her they should’ve been just friends, and all its pieces coming back together the minute Waverly kissed her in Nedley’s office... their first time, their big fight, all of the times they’d lost and found each other over the years... her regret of not having said yes right away... her hope slowly fading away in those 18 months alone... what they did on the stairs, and on the kitchen floor, and in the barn this morning... What a ride they had, huh?

That’s what she said. She can imagine Wynonna saying to her. The thought makes her smile. That woman is a real sucker for a dirty joke. And she’s part of their journey too. Who would’ve thought they could become best friends. And yet, here they are. It’s crazy how close they’ve become.

Right as she’s thinking about that, Nicole is brought back to reality by the sound of knocking on the front door. Speaking of the devil...

“May I come in? Please, tell me you’re not naked...” Wynonna asks as she walks in with a hand covering her eyes.

“Actually, I’m lying completely naked on your bed right now.” Nicole jokes.

“I’d rather not think about what you did on my bed this morning...” Wynonna says lowering her hand.

“Excuse me?!” How the hell does she know about their morning... exchange of love.

“Poor innocent Jeremy told me about it. Poor soul, I think you traumatized him for life...” she mocks her.

Nicole shakes her head in disbelief. “Just come here, and sit with me, Earp.” She invites her patting at the space beside her on the mattress.

“Huh uh, no way. I’m never touching that bed again.”

“We didn’t even do it on the bed!” Nicole yells before she can realize what she is actually saying.

“Yep. I’m burning this whole barn to the ground tonight.” Wynonna states in a joking tone before going to sit on the bed near Nicole.

When she was settled, Nicole smiled her beautiful bright smile at her, and Wynonna noticed her eyes were sparkling with tears.

“You okay, Haught?”

“I’m getting married to Waverly Earp today...” she says as if that could answer Wynonna’s question.

“You’d better.”

Nicole chuckles lightly at that, and then she asks: “how is she?”

“She’s ready.” Somehow Wynonna knows exactly what Nicole needed to hear. “Oh, I almost forgot. I got you something” She exclaims a moment later, taking a necklace from her dress, in the space right over her boob. “No pockets.” She explains with a shrug when Nicole laughs lightly at her. Same old Wynonna.

“Please tell me it’s not a boner necklace...” Nicole jokes.

“Damn it! Now I’m mad I didn’t think of that!”

That makes Nicole laugh again. And in that moment, she realizes the tears that once threatened to fall are now completely gone. Wynonna did it again. It crazy how this woman can make it all go away with just one joke.

“But seriously... here.” Wynonna says as she hands over the necklace to Nicole.

Nicole takes it and lays it on the palm of her hand, so she can study the pendant. It’s the shape of a heart, and inside it there are two small figures, two girls sitting on its outline as if the pendant was a swing. On the outline of the heart, then, there are two small inscriptions: always my sister / forever my friend. Nicole reads them, and then turns to look at Wynonna in shock. That’s definitely not the gift she was expecting to get from “miss everything’s a joke to me”.

“Waverly gave it to me for my eighteenth birthday, right before I left Purgatory... She wanted me to know that I’d always have a home here if I wanted to come back. I always have it with me. Even if I’m not wearing it. It’s like my lucky charm. Which is kind of stupid considering all the troubles I got in in my life...”

“Wynonna, I...” Nicole’s at a loss of words. No one’s ever given her something that was so special to them.

“You’re gonna be my sister now, right?” she says matter-of-factly, and Nicole can feel herself getting all emotional again.

“I’ve never had a sister…” She states, mimicking what Wynonna had told her a little less than two years ago. I’ve never had a best friend.

“You do now.” Wynonna states in all seriousness as she fights back the tears blurring her eyes. “A pretty messed up one, but...” she starts to joke, but Nicole interrupts her.

“She’s perfect that way.” She says taking hold of Wynonna’s hand and giving it a gentle squeeze.

They stay like that for a moment, neither one breaking the peaceful silence that fell upon them. Nicole can’t take her eyes off the necklace. Waverly gave it to Wynonna, and now Wynonna is giving it to her. It’s not just a promise to be friends and sisters forever, it’s also a way for Wynonna to say “Waverly’s the most precious thing that I have, and now she’s yours to protect and love”. The idea makes her even more emotional, but if she cries now, she’ll ruin all her makeup, and it took Rachel half an hour to put it on. So she takes a deep breath to force back the tears, and then she gets up and turns to face Wynonna.

“Help me put it on?” She asks, holding out the necklace for Wynonna to take.

A tear falls down Wynonna’s cheek as she smiles at her friend. She wipes it away quickly with the back of her hand, and then, she gets up grabbing the necklace. As she is fastening it, they hear a knock on the door. It’s Rachel. In a very Wynonna-fashion she does not wait for an answer before walking in. She is here to let them know everyone’s ready, and they’re just waiting for the two of them. All of a sudden Nicole feels like she can’t breathe. It’s happening. It’s time. OMG. Her heart is racing uncontrollably, and she thinks she might get sick. That, of course, does not go unnoticed on Wynonna, who puts her hand on Nicole’s shoulder, giving it an encouraging squeeze.

“C’mon, Haught. You’ve waited long enough. Now you get to be happy.” She smiles lovingly at her friend. Best friend. God, she’s so happy for her right now. She finally gets to be happily married to the love of her life. It’s what she deserves.

When she feels Nicole is breathing somewhat steadily again, she offers up her arm for her to lean on as they walk out. With a deep breath, Nicole puts her hand on Wynonna’s arm, and she lets her friend lead her out of the barn, with Rachel in tow. It’s a beautiful sunny day, and she can smell the perfumes of a thousand flowers, and the green grass around the Homestead is glowing bright in the summer sun. Nicole takes a look at the guests waiting for them by their seats. It’s not many people, it’s true, but all the ones who matter are here. Jeremy, Doc, Nedley, Billy, Mercedes… wait. No way! No! She turns towards Wynonna in shock.

“Are you serious right now?!” she exclaims in disbelief.

“Do you know someone else who can officiate your wedding?!”

“Anyone but Bunny!”

“Listen, sheriff, she’s who I found, okay? Do you wanna get married or what?”

“You’re gonna be the death of me, Earp…”

“Oh, please, your life would be so boring without me.”

“I’m marrying your sister, I can think of a few ways to entertain myself…” she objects with a smirk.

Their banter is interrupted by Nedley clearing his throat to get their attention. “Ladies…”

Both turn to look at him. Nicole can instantly feel the tears forming in her eyes. He’s here to walk her down the aisle. This is all surreal. How is this real life? She feels like she’s in a dream.

“Wow… Look at you.” Nedley says in admiration.

“Yeah, you don’t look bad yourself.”

“I’m proud of you, kiddo.” He says in her ear as he brings her in for a tight hug.

Nicole’s been able to hold back the tears so far, but after those words she just can’t. Her parents might not be there to support her, but she has Nedley, and that’s all that matters. She allows one tear to stream down her cheek, but then she collects herself quickly. She can’t cry. Not before the ceremony has even started. Nedley smiles lovingly at her as they let go of each other, and then he holds out his arm for her to lean on. Nicole takes one last look around, and she notices Wynonna is gone. She must’ve gone get Waverly. It’s time. No more waiting. This time it’s for real. Smiling back at Nedley, she puts her hand on his arm, and they start walking towards the others. My God, this is crazy. She thinks as she sees Bunny waving at her happily. Just a perfect Earp-fashion wedding...

As they walk slowly down the aisle, her eyes get wet all over again. She just can’t help it. When she got to Purgatory she was completely alone, and now she’s getting married to the love of her life and she’s got a family who loves and supports her. She is smiling so big right now, she can feel her cheeks beginning to hurt, and just the idea of seeing Waverly makes her hearts burst with joy. She looks at Rachel, her maid of honor, and she feels so proud. The past 19 months weren’t easy for either of them, but they got through. Together. They’ve seen each other at their worst, and now hopefully they’ll get to see each other at their best too. Today a new chapter begins. A better one for sure. No matter what happens next, nothing can be worse than the hopelessness and loneliness she’s felt in those eighteen months alone.

Nicole is brought back from her thoughts when Nedley gives her hand a gentle squeeze. Nicole gives him a sweet kiss on the cheek, and then he moves away to get to his seat. All of a sudden, murmurs fill the air, and she turns to see Waverly and Wynonna walking out of the homestead and towards them. Nicole can feel her heart pounding hard. Wow… Waverly looks so beautiful… She is in a long sleeveless white lace dress. Her hair is tied up on the back of her head, and it has beautiful colorful flowers in it. Her makeup, just like Nicole’s, is very simple, and she is absolutely breathtaking. Nicole can’t help but stare at her in awe as she walks down the aisle leaning on Wynonna’s arm. And the same goes for Waverly as she studies her fiancée’s look. They both look perfect. This is all so perfect.

“Hi” “Hey” They greet each other once they’re standing side by side.

“Haught.” Wynonna says as she lets go of Waverly to embrace Nicole. “You take care of my baby sis, okay?” she whispers in her ear, her voice cracking with emotion.

“Always.”

“You got the girl, Nicole. Now go get your wife.” Wynonna says leaning back and winking at her.

What happens next is a mystery to Nicole and Waverly. All they can focus on is the person standing right in front of them, and it feels like they’re in a bubble, just the two of them. They can barely process what’s going on as Bunny takes the word to let the ceremony begin. They come back to reality when it’s time for them to say their vows.

“Sheriff…” Bunny invites her to go first.

She’s had a hard time in the past few days trying to find the right things to say, but she’s figure it out at last. Although no words could ever fully express how much Waverly Earp really means to her. As she takes Waverly’s hands into her own, she begins.

“Waverly Earp… You are my home, my love, my Angel. You are the oxygen that keeps me breathing, and the light that brightens my days. Being loved by you is by far the best thing that’s ever happened to me. You came into my life at a time when I was lost, and alone, and you turned my world completely upside down. You filled the void in my heart with joy, and laughter, and love. You gave me memories to hold onto, and reasons to fight, and stay. You turned this unfamiliar place into my home, and these strangers into my family, and all of my insecurities into my biggest strengths. You taught me to love myself just as much as I love you, and you showed me perfection where I could only see flaws. You inspire me to be the best version of me, and to always be fighting for what I believe in. You are everything I’ve ever wanted, and so so much more.” She pauses briefly to turn and take the ring from Rachel, and then she continues.

“So today, in front of our friends, and family, I take you, Waverly Earp, to be my wife. I give you this ring as a promise to love you, respect you, cherish you, and support you as my partner, my person, and my equal. And I swear I’ll do my absolute best to make you smile as bright as you do today for the rest of our lives. I vow to be a loving and protective wife, to be open to change, and ready for every challenge that comes our way. And for as long as I live and breathe, I will be by your side. Always your shield, forever your wife.”

Wow... that was a lot. Waverly knows it’s her turn now, but she is so emotional she is afraid she might forget everything that she wanted to say. She looks down at the ring on her finger, and somehow it calms her down. Looking back up into Nicole’s beautiful brown eyes, she knows she just has to speak from her heart, and the right words will come. So she takes a deep breath to steady her voice, and then she begins.

“Nicole Haught... wow, I can’t believe this is actually happening! I’ll never forget the day you walked into Shorty’s with your uniform, and your Stetson in your hands, and confidence for days. I’d been living a life in black and white for so long that I’d forgotten what real happiness felt like. But then you smiled your beautiful bright smile at me, and it all turned into colors. You showed me that it’s okay to be ambitious, and that I should never settle for anything less than what I deserve. You gave me a choice when I thought I had none. In a world of people telling me who to be, you just asked me to be myself. You held me together when my world was falling apart, and you made me feel special, when I didn’t know who I was anymore. You... you, Nicole Haught, are extraordinary. Whenever I’m in a dark place, you light my way back to safety. You are my harbor, my anchor, my rock. I don’t have anything to give you if not unconditional love, and support. And I don’t know what the future will hold for us, but I’m not afraid. Because I know that, whatever comes next, we will face it together. Side by side as it’s always been.” Mimicking Nicole, she pauses briefly to turn and take the ring from Wynonna. And then, she continues.

“Today, I take you to be my wife, on this land that’s always been my home, because you, Nicole Rayleigh Haught, are my home. With this ring, I promise to love you, respect you and support you as my love, my equal, and my partner. I will be your shoulder to cry on, and a rock to lean on. Your number one fan, the reason for your smile, and your light in the darkness. I vow to be a loving and protective wife, to love all of your flaws and imperfections, and to stand by your side for the rest of my life. Always your angel, forever your wife.”

Tears are streaming down their faces by the time Waverly finishes talking. They turn to look at their family, and they are all crying as well. Even Bunny seems to be a little bit emotional when she takes the word to conclude the ceremony.

“Alright then. Let’s make this official!” She exclaims. “By the power vested in me by... Wynonna Earp this morning, I now pronounce you partners for life, wife and wife. You may kiss your bride.”

Waverly and Nicole don’t waste a second. Without letting go of each other’s hands, they lean in for their first of many many kisses as wives. It’s just a tender kiss, but it still conveys all the love they have just professed for one another. When they part, Nicole leans down so her forehead is resting on Waverly’s. And as they stay like that for a moment, it seems like everything else disappears, and it’s just the two of them. Their eyes are blurry with tears, and all they can see are the big bright smiles lighting up their faces. This is doubtless the happiest day of their lives. There is so much joy in their hearts right now that it feels as if they might even explode.

“My wife.” Nicole states in a dreaming tone.

“Forever.” Waverly adds.

“I love you, Waverly Earp.”

“And I love you, Nicole Haught.”

None of the rest matters. As long as they have each, there is nothing they can’t overcome. Their love has survived the most impossible situations, and it will last forever. Of that they are sure.

Always your shield, forever your wife.

Always you angel, forever your wife.

[beyondcanon]

fanfic: a family wedding

here i am, out of a 5-year retirement, back on my bullshit. a new offering, from a new fandom. enjoy:

wynonna earp/wayhaught.  Waverly and Nicole's wedding turns everyone into a bridezilla. Complete. Read on AO3.

i.

Waverly rubs her temples. She wanted a quiet night in, to watch some RuPaul and hopefully later spend long moments sitting on Nicole's face.

The house has been full of people for the last three weeks, bustling with activity and constant bickering.

Nicole rubs Waverly's back and kisses just beneath her ear. It makes it a little better. "It's time for the contingency plan, baby."

Waverly sighs. "Why does everyone have to be..." She searches for the right words. "Like this?" She gestures around, defeated.

"I am the best cowboy!" Doc grunts, pushing past Mercedes. "I won't be made to wear a tux!"

"We're not all from the Old West, old man." Jeremy stands by Mercedes’s side, who gives her best I am always right smile. "We have to be color-coordinated!"

"You can go dressed as a magic elephant, for all I care." He sips his whiskey.

This is why she can't have nice things.

Nicole squeezes Waverly's shoulder. "You're a planner, aren't you?" She gives her that little adorable smile. "So let's plan our wedding. Make it amazing."

Wynonna arrives with cheap booze and Shorty's chicken wings. "Anyone want to try wedding samples?" She settles them on the table with a loud thud

No no no nononono—

"Enough!" Waverly stands up, stomps her foot on the ground, and claps her hands. "Everyone sit down!"

It shocks everyone enough and the house falls silent.

"Yes, baby girl?" Wynonna smiles pretty, like she's doesn't always have a fire burning under her ass.

“The madness stops now." Waverly walks to the cupboard and takes the bright pink folder she's been hiding for two whole days and nights. "It's my wedding." Her gaze softens when it meets Nicole, who winks at her.

"I'm going to lay some ground rules." She takes several papers and passes them around. "I have assigned you each a role in this mess."

Everyone starts reading, nodding, flipping through pages. They are taking it much better than Waverly imagined.

"You have our wishes and specific deadlines for each task." She looks at each of the lunatics in their eyes. "You'll stick to your role, and you won't make final decisions without me or Nicole present. Understood?"

They nod.

Nicole gets up from the couch to stand by Waverly's side, a comforting hand on the small of her back. "We have three months. Can we count on you?"

The entire house rumbles with cheer.

"A round of shots for everybody!" Wynonna shouts before rushing to grab the glasses.

It takes no time for everyone to be comparing assignments.

Nicole pulls Waverly aside and whispers in her ear. "That was so hot, baby."

"You liked it?" Waverly bites her lower lip, grabbing Nicole's shirt to pull her even closer. "I've saved the best for later."

Nicole smiles, that handsome devil, arms around Waverly, and leans for a wet, dirty kiss.

—

Nicole called it saving costs, but Waverly calls it porn:

A white tank top, dirty and clinging to her body, tight jeans, brown boots, drops of sweat on her glorious, exposed, lean, muscled back.

Power tools, gloves, woodwork? In the middle of her front lawn?

"I know." Wynonna shows up by Waverly's side, leaning against the door frame, and stares.

Doc, sexy if mustaches and Old West are your things, is cutting wood, black tank top, rough jeans, black boots, grunting in concentration.

"Oh yes," Waverly nods, half a glass of lemonade forgotten on her right hand. "I love a good DIY project."

Nicole is setting up the frame of the structure, drilling holes, and what else. She looks back and smiles, much like that first day on Shorty's.

Waverly gnaws her straw, short of breath.

-

Doc cleans his forehead. "I'm going to the store to get more supplies."

Waverly shows up, hair down and big, big smile. "Lemonade?" She offers the tray.

He takes a glass and Nicole settles down her tools with a content sigh, hair sticking to the back of her neck.

Waverly salivates as she extends her tray to her future wife.

One thing you can say about Doc is the man can read a room. He looks between the both of them before tipping his head as a thank you. "Be back later."

"Maybe you want to come inside and rest, after all your..." Waverly squeezes Nicole's arm," hard work?"

Nicole smiles, dimple and all, and takes a few steps closer. She smells like wood, grass, and vanilla. "There's a lot to do. We only have a few weeks."

Waverly looks up into Nicole's eyes. Grabbing her belt, she sneaks a few fingers between Nicole's jeans and her glorious warm skin. "Resting is so important when you work this hard, baby."

"You're not wrong."

Waverly, so coy and innocent, blinks and pulls them inside.

In appreciation, she waits for Nicole to finish her drink to only then go down on her on the kitchen table. 35 minutes later, she comes back for air and cleans her face with the back of her hand.

Now that's refreshing.

-

Mercedes, in a long white dress, looks every part like the socialite she is.

"This is unacceptable!" She shows her scary vampire teeth, and the poor catering people retreat two to seven steps. "Being vegan is not an excuse to serve us this rotten, tasteless..." Her mouth contorts, incapable of finishing the sentence.

Waverly opens her mouth to defend the catering, because what you'd expect from a small-town, backyard company — Mercedes lifts a commanding finger and grabs her phone.

Nicole, all parts, hero and sexy beast, places an arm on Waverly's shoulders, and whispers: "Let her do her thing, baby."

Every hair on Waverly's body stands. That's very convincing.

"Marco?" Mercedes smiles and tucks a strand of her behind her ear, vampire teeth concealed. "Yes, so long." She chuckles. "I know. Where's Ibiza when we need it?"

Looking at her own pristine, manicured nails, she sighs. "Listen, I need a favor. I'm organizing a wedding, and you know how food is essential to having a good time. But I can't seem to find good service in this town." She punishes the employees with a cold, cold glare.

"I was wondering if you could spare me Giovanni for a few days, so he can take charge." She smiles, nails running on the table. "I still remember that banquet in 2014, don't you?" She offers the wedding info and hangs up.

Waverly tilts her head.

She looks back to the catering employees and offers a plastic smile. "There you go. You will have a new boss."

Nicole clears her throat. "Excuse me?"

"My taste buds need something of a certain level, Nicole." Mercedes puts her phone on her Prada leather purse. "And you both deserve to know what good food is. Giovanni will take care of the menu, the supplies, and he will be here to avoid a succession of inevitable disasters."

Waverly leans forward. "Who's Giovanni, again?"

"A personal friend, an underwear model, and a rising star in Italy's high dining scene. Just opened his first franchise in New York, so. Right by our side. Lucky for us!"

New York City isn't exactly a short drive away, but Waverly isn't going to tell Mercedes that. Neither was Giovanni.

-

Thirteen dresses later, Waverly finds the one.

The store lights bathe her in the spotlight, with the seamstress fussing over the hem of the dress — flowing, pearl white, structured but still fluid when Waverly spins around.

She turns to Wynonna and makes a pose.

"Baby girl, you look..." Wynonna looks at her like she's everything, eyes already watery. "Perfect."

Waverly beams, cheeks flushed, heart racing. This is it.

She's going to marry the love of her life in this dress.

After everything. Despite everything. She's going to marry the love of her life.

She tries a delicate, golden necklace on. It shines under the gentle dressing room lights.

Even better. She touches it with the tips of her fingers. "I can't believe it."

Wynonna coughs, smirk back to her face. "Nicole’s panties are going to combust as soon as she sees you."

Waverly slaps her sister's arm. "Wynonna!"

She will, though. She totally will.

And Waverly is not going to be using any underwear, so.

Good luck to Nicole in dealing with that information.

-

The demon bar is closed, with only a few employees restocking on the back, under neon lights.

Rosita, cigar on one hand and whiskey neat on the other, raises her eyebrows and smiles as Waverly approaches with a pie.

"Peace offering?" She sets her drink on the table as a beautiful bartender drapes herself around her, a hand on her bare chest under her blazer.

Waverly focuses on Rosita's dark eyes. She will not stare at that gratuitous PDA nor the bartender sucking on Rosita's earlobe.

Rosita smirks and pulls the pie closer. "Smells good."

"There's more." Waverly takes a top-tier, aged whiskey bottle from her purse and places it on the table.

Rosita's eyes shine — she opens immediately and takes a sip. "That's the good stuff. Gonna save it for a special occasion." She leans back on her seat. "But my birthday is not in four months."

For a breath, Waverly hesitates. "My wedding is next weekend."

"I've got the invitation. Beautiful lettering."

The bartender leaves, looking at Waverly from head to toe and making her squirmish.

She clears her throat. "Can I trust there will be no supernatural shenanigans? For a whole weekend?"

Rosita looks at her, kinder than a moment ago, and finishes her drink. "I own you that, at least." She stretches her empty glass to the side and the bartender pops up with another, touch lingering before leaving.

The woman is living in her customized heaven.

She turns back to Waverly. "To be fair, Doc has already a. showed up with two shiny guns and b. chose a few demons for security. It's all settled."

Waverly's eyes widen. "He what?"

"You know he's a worrier, darling." Rosita takes a puff of her cigar. "Do you mind if I wear red? I've been meaning to ask you."

Waverly rolls her eyes. "Wear whatever you want. As long as you stay out of trouble."

Rosita pouts her pretty, full red lips. "Me? Trouble?" She purrs, full of mischief. "Never."

-

Jeremy shines when he has goals and deadlines.

He begins his Powerpoint presentation about the wedding, running decisions, costs, and purveyors.

"It's your wet dream, baby," Nicole laughs when he opens a detailed excel sheet.

"Oh, hush, you," Waverly nudges her to-be wife and shuts her up with a kiss. "Continue, Jeremy. You're perfect the way you are."

He’s dumping even more information when Waverly notices something. "Wait." She scoots closer to the computer screen. "My first rough budgets were at least two times what you're showing us."

"See, uh, the numbers," Jeremy stops, mumbles something, stops again.

Nicole raises an eyebrow. "Jeremy."

He gives them a sheepish smile. "Everyone wanted to chip in."

Nicole blinks, frozen. "What?"

"It was supposed to be a kind of a secret?" He gives them a weird chuckle. "But my graphs were so nice, and I thought Waverly would want to see them, and... now we're here."

"Everyone wanted to chip in," Waverly repeats, dumbstruck.

"Yeah, uh, Wynonna is paying for your dress, Doc and Nedley are taking over half of the booze budget, Mercedes said she had a special deal with some Giovanni man about the food, and I don't have much but there's enough for some of the flowers, and Contessa sent me a check, and then..."

"That's... very nice of you." Nicole pulls Jeremy for a hug. "All of you." Waverly follows them into a group hug.

Jeremy sinks into their embrace, relieved. "You should start this new chapter without debt."

Silly, silly people. Waverly sniffs. She's not crying.

-

Doc's scrubbing, sanding, and painting the fences. He smiles somewhere under his mustache when Waverly arrives. "Afternoon."

He's been fixing the property every day, and it shows.

"It's looking great, Doc." Waverly can't help but grin.

"Everything for our girls," he answers, never stopping his work. It's different, being taken care of.

Waverly looks at her own feet for a moment. That gets Doc to pause. "You didn't have to talk to Rosita."

"I know." He nods. "I'm sorry if I overstepped. I wanted to make sure everyone would be safe and focused on celebrating." A long pause. "We had enough suffering already."

"You didn't have to do that," Waverly says quietly. "Thank you."

-

Waverly enjoys a moment of peace on the couch, cuddling against Nicole as they each read a book.

Rachel walks in circles in the living room, white earphones over her ear, until she screams, "I GOT IT!"

Waverly enjoyed a moment of peace, that is. She closes her book, followed suit by Nicole. "Yes, Rachel?"

"Listen, a two-day ceremony is not easy, okay?" Rachel gesticulates. "There are so many moments, the music has fit the mood. So I made four different playlists."

Nicole pulls Waverly to her lap, equal parts gratuitous and welcome. Waverly rests her side against her fiancée, hand playing with gorgeous, silky red hair.

The closer they are to the wedding, the harder it becomes to stay away. She wants to be touching Nicole all the time, every time.

Rachel clears her throat. "You do make The Notebook look bleak."

They both smile, turning their attention to their unpaid DJ.

"Back to business!" Rachel sits by their side and shows her phone screen. "There are four playlists. I call them: Drunk in Love, Let's Get That Party Started, Soft Rock for Old People, and Live, Laugh, Love. Each lasts several hours."

Nicole nods, impressed. "I hope there's plenty of throwbacks."

"Yeah yeah," Rachel waves. "Plenty of the 90s and 2000s for old people do their old people dances." Her face turns very serious. "No Macarena. I have standards."

Waverly smiles.

-

They decide to get ready at Nicole's because they need a moment.

Waverly leaves the bathroom in a tight, golden dress that doesn't quite reach half her thighs.

Nicole, sitting on the edge of the bed, puts her phone aside. "Nedley says everything's going well and we should—" She looks at Waverly and stops dead in her tracks. "Oh. Baby."

"We should?" Waverly takes a few steps towards her high heels, putting her earring on.

"Baby." Is Nicole... breathless? Waverly turns to look at her future wife in slack pants and dress shirt still undone, sexy lace lingerie. A vision.

Nicole's lips part open, chest rising and falling quickly. "You're a vision."

Waverly dismisses her with a wave and a smile, face turning hot. "I haven't even finished my makeup."

Nicole gets very close, very fast. "We're going to be late."

We still have half an hour, and we're almost ready—" Waverly frowns.

Nicole pushes her against the dresser, bodies in full contact, lips grazing Waverly's. "We're going to be late," she says, voice dropping an octave, hand on the back of Waverly's neck.

Waverly's breath catches on her throat.

Oh.

She places one hand on Nicole's chest, licking her lips. "Nicole..."

"You're the most gorgeous girl I've ever seen." She grabs the back of Waverly's thighs, and soon Waverly is sitting on the dresser, legs spread open. "I need to have a taste." She joins their lips in a slow, wet kiss. "I promise I won't ruin your makeup too much."

Heart pounding wild, Waverly lets out a shaky breath. "Take off your shirt. I wouldn't want it to get wrinkled."

Nicole obeys.

-

Waverly and Nicole walk into Shorty's, arms linked and sway on their hips. A pair of retired demon bartenders offer champagne, and they each take one.

The crew cleaned up the place nicely for the rehearsal dinner. There's a giant table in the middle of the room, candles all around, soft music playing on the speakers.

This is where it all began. This is where they would come together as a family before the big day.

They take their seats, Nicole's arm resting on the back of Waverly's chair. Her shirt is two buttons open too sexy.

Waverly stares like she hasn't spent the last hour kissing, biting, and licking those wonderful assets. Can anyone tell Waverly came two times in Nicole's car before arriving?

Wynonna looks at them with a very particular smile, eyebrows wobbling.

Yes, they can.

Nedley raises his glass. "Let the feast begin!"

The bartenders arrive in a choreography of endless drinks and trays of food.

It's lovely, and Waverly's heart could explode.

-

Belly full, head dizzy, Waverly looks at Nicole, who's talking to Wynonna like old pals.

She lays her head on Nicole's shoulder and her very nearly wife turns to kiss Waverly's head before returning to the conversation.

How did she manage to find someone like this? How does someone get that lucky?

Doc stands up, charming in his modern cowboy look. He clinks his glass. "It's time for a toast." Oh, man. Everyone falls silent, eyes darting between Doc and the couple. 

"Waverly, you're sweet as a summer peach. You're the heart of this ragged group of outsiders." A lengthy round of claps. "Nicole, you have some gut. You're not afraid to stand up for creatures much stronger than you and fifteen times as dangerous. You could have a quiet life, and still, you chose us. You're out of your mind."

They laugh and toast together. "To insanity!"

Nedley clears his throat. All eyes go to him. "Nicole, I'm so proud of the woman you've become and the family you made for yourself." He says it slow, gentle, measuring his words. "Waverly, you found yourself a good one. Every bit good and sweet as you are. You both deserve all the happiness in the world. Marriage is a wild ride and life can be tough: good luck."

Waverly nods and toasts with him, holding back tears.

"I made, uh, a quick chat about—" Jeremy begins before Wynonna boos and throws a grape in his direction. "Tough crowd," he says, standing up and getting a laugh out of most people. "Seriously, though. As the wedding planner, social media manager, and chapel coordinator..." He pauses and looks around. "Which are three of the most important jobs," he raises a finger and ignores Doc's huffing by his side. "Thank you for letting me live vicariously through you both. You are the gay unicorns. Thank you for not dying, several times."

Another toast! Can Waverly even hold this much alcohol? She giggles.

Wynonna stands up: tight black dress, plenty of cleavage and gun strapped to her thigh and whiskey on her hand. "Nicole, thank you for making my baby sister happy." She locks eyes with Waverly, so soft and content. Waverly smiles and squeezes Nicole's arm. "We've been to hell and back. We learned to like each other, even though you're a goody-two-shoes who fucked my sister on every surface available on my house." The whole table laughs; Waverly hides her face on the crook of Nicole's neck. "Oh yes, Sheriff, I know. I wish I didn't. One more reason I need therapy." More laughs. She raises her glass. "Thank you for putting up with us."

The bartenders serve their shots. "To sound insulation!" Wynonna shouts.

Waverly downs her drink, feeling it burn on the back of her throat. Oh, Nicole will have to carry her home if they keep this up.

Downing two shots in close succession, Wynonna looks at Rachel and gestures with her head.

The girl gets up from her seat, orange juice on a champagne glass. "Marriage is totally a failed institution, but—" She fidgets with her dress. "If anyone can make it work, it's the two of you. It's gross, really." She gets a thunderous laugh from the others and gives a small smile. "To lesbian moms!"

Nicole raises her champagne glass.

-

Gunshots and people screaming.

Of course.

Wynonna, Doc, and Nicole jump immediately, retrieving their guns as they out the bar.

Waverly huffs, reflexes slow, and no gun anywhere near.

"Stop right there!" She can hear Nicole scream, already outside.

When she gets to the action, four demons are trying to rob a store. Great. Talk about trusting Rosita.

Nicole points Peacemaker at them. "If I were you, I'd listen to the Sheriff."

They growl, posture wobbly as if drunk or drugged on something. "Can't a demon have some fun in this town?"

A thunder falls, and a deep voice echoes. "What did I say?"

Waverly looks and approaching at a distance: Rosita, red overcoat, and hair flowing in the autumn wind. She's almost floating right above the ground, the definition of power.

"Not today, boys," she orders, with an easy command. "Not tomorrow. And not the day after that." She's already very close. "Is that too much to ask?"

She looks at the humans trapped inside and the doors open. "Get out." The young family scurries away, no questions asked.

She slaps the demons in quick succession. "It's like you can't take a fucking order." They try to fight, but Rosita is quicker, stronger, and doesn't take a single blow.

It's a beautiful one and a half minutes.

Wynonna breaks a smile, gun still pointed at the group. "You go, girlboss."

Rosita rolls her eyes, a high-heeled boot on a demon's throat, a hand on another's throat, as two lie on the floor, passed out. "I'm sorry about the disturbance. You may go back to your festivities."

Waverly feels a bit guilty. Maybe Rosita's not so bad.

"See you tomorrow." Rosita drags the demons back to wherever they came from.

Nicole shrugs and sets her gun back on its holster. "C'mon, baby. Night's still young."

Waverly takes her hand, tripping just a little on the walk back to Shorty’s.

By the end of the night, Nicole does carry her to bed, with a big glass of water and some aspirin. -

Read chapter Two.

[raccoontycoon17]

My fav TV female antiheroes as song lyrics from underrated artists

Lena Luthor: “She gave me a million ways to call her back and I gave her a million reasons to forget me. Thoughts were always clear— words just weren't that easy. Now you've got a body, and I haven't been sleepin' lately” - She Knows by Hollie Col

Villanelle | Oksana Astankova: “Give your heart and soul to charity 'cause the rest of you, the best of you, Honey, belongs to me” - NFWMB by Hozier 

Azula: “I could switch my ways, but what would I do with the rest of my days? I could work this out, but I'm entertained when I'm giving me hell” - Sabotage by Moby Rich

Catra: “Dive bars and our first kiss. Sophomores without scars yet. Thirty-six months, just the two of us, only one mistake to mess it up” - Strangers by Fletcher

Rosa Diaz: “And tell me why'd you have to have such a damn good taste in music? Yeah, if all my favorite songs make me think of you I'm gonna lose it” - Lose It by SWRMS

Wynonna Earp: “Don't need a license when you've got no drive. It feels so right taking the wrong advice. They tell me one day that I'll pay the price. They're saying maybe I'll go up in flames” - Ride or Die by The Knocks (ft. Foster The People)

Johanna Mason (yes from the books but I love her so I’m including her): “Devil's got a hold and we're laughing. You don't even know me, but you're calling me Daddy. I'm running on red through the canyon, singing I'm a bad man, bad man” - Devil’s in the Backseat by Lostboycrow

.

(Feel free to drop underrated song suggestions and/or lyrics you always paired with these characters!)

[ofxwordsxandxletters]

Learning Curve

Series: Wynonna Earp

Disclaimer: The pairing and plot are mine and the characters are borrowed in this work of fan-made fiction off of which no money is made.

Pairing: Hollirey

Rating: PG

Self-indulgent drabble regarding a personal HC that the one sure way of making Bobo Del Rey uncomfortable is anything soft and tender because that's when feelings are at risk. Given a choice, he prefers less gentle encounters because then it doesn't have to mean anything. So when faced with something that goes against that, he does the only thing he knows how to do; run.

Thankfully for them both, Doc is far more stubborn than Bobo could ever be scared.

*~*~*~*~*

Learning Curve

“Is something up?” The question has Doc slowly shifting his gaze at Waverly who is watching him from the other side of the bar worriedly.

“Why ever would you think that?”

“Because you’ve spent the last couple of days looking at your phone with growing degrees of exasperation and annoyance.”

He was being obvious, he realizes and that wasn’t exactly what he’d wanted. “It’s...complicated,” he responds as he slides the phone into his pocket trying for a smile and sure it doesn’t reach his eyes at the moment, “but it’s...fine.” Except he has the sinking suspicion that it is anything of the sort which was most of the problem.

“Are you sure?”

He brings the cup to his lips unsure how to answer that without it being a clear lie. If he had to make a true guess; nothing was going to be alright until he went and forced the other to talk to him like a normal person. And the ground was shaky enough between them that he didn’t really want to muddy the water further by getting anyone else involved. So he takes a sip before murmuring, “I’m sure, Waverly, but thanks for the concern.”

It’s another couple of days before he’s absolutely had all he can take of the nonsense and he drives himself out there. He’s not even sure what he’s supposed to say or what excuse that might possibly work here but if he didn’t do something he was liable to shoot someone.

Or actually see what it would take to raise a man and then kill him again.

So without more than how he feels coiling him tighter than a spring, he bangs on the familiar trailer door and waits. Then he bangs again. Waits. Repeats. It’s the seventh time before the door opens with a snapped, “Th’ hell do you want?!”

“Hello to you, too, Robert,” he greets, “Mind if I step in?”

“Absolutely not,” comes the immediate response as the other’s demeanor goes guarded and wary, “I thought I made it quite clear to you that…”

And it was as far as Doc was willing to let the other go as he took a few steps in and crowds the man back into the trailer. “What part of ‘no’ was not clear in that?” Bobo demands teeth bared at him.

“All of it,” he replies amiably.

“How...You know what, I’m not asking anything else. Get out. And stay away from me, Holliday.”

“Now, Robert, I know you don’t mean that.”

“No? You want me to throw you out and see if I don’t mean it?” comes the low warning in a growled tone that should have him worried but honestly, he’d spent the week concerned about other things.

“Robert, what is this really about because I know something happened. You have never pulled away this hard before.”

“There is nothing between us for you to concern yourself about. Go back to Shorty’s and leave me alone, Holliday. I mean it.”

But he didn’t, that much was clear. In fact, the more Doc looks the more afraid the other seems. Of him. It hits like a freight train as he finally realizes what he should have known from the start in terms of this man alone: there were things Bobo Del Rey was used to, a lot of them. However, there were things he wasn’t and Doc had probably hit them all the last time they were together.

Robert was absolutely not sure how to handle what had transpired the last time they were together and he was running scared. Doc should not have waited this long to come and find him but he’d been hoping the other would calm down and talk. Clearly there were things so broken that he had to be more conscientious of them if he wanted to make this work between them. And he did very much want this to work.

“Robert,” he says softer this time, more gently, “I told you that I was in this to the end and I meant it. You can trust me not to hurt you on purpose. You mean way too much to me for me to just let this go. Confide in me or at least give me an idea here what happened.”

“Holliday…”

The warning was clear: he did not want to have this conversation. At all. But Doc was nothing if not a stubborn bastard so he takes an alternative road and leans the inches between them to press his lips to his softly, sweetly. And it definitely catches the other off-guard drawing a soft sound from low in his throat. Doc breaks it with a quiet, “You are not used to someone being sweet to you, are you? You have no idea how to handle this.”

“Don’t…”

“Robert, you deserve to be treated gently because you deserve all good things. Me being kind to you does not come with any sort of strings. There are no ulterior motives, nothing waiting in the wings to trip you up and trap you or hurt you worse, I promise. Just let me love you, you insufferable demon and stop hiding from me.”

“You don’t.”

Doc blinks at him a moment at the sheer audacity those two words hold. “I don’t?” he asks, “You tellin’ me how I feel now?”

“You can’t possibly…”

“Oh, I can and I do,” Doc interrupts him not wanting to hear the rest of it but knowing what he means, “You seem to forget, Robert, that I am not now nor have I ever been like Wyatt Earp. I do not abandon what should be most precious to me. I am a lot of things but what I am not is in the business of usin’ a man for my own ends.”

“You have every reason to. Wyatt certainly…”

“Wyatt,” Doc sighs softly, “Listen to me carefully about Wyatt goddamn Earp would you? The man neither deserved you nor treated you properly. Hell, I didn’t do you any much of a service either back then. But unlike Wyatt, I do not intend to repeat my past indiscretions where you are concerned, Robert. I do not.”

“Just...please go.”

“No,” he says firmly, “No, Robert.” There is something heartbreaking about the look he’s flashed, the look of just desperation as it becomes clear that losing him might just be the last straw in a lifetime of abandonment and he’d prefer to do it now rather than later. Doc reaches and tugs the other to him. “I’m not leavin’, Robert. I’m not. Not without a hell of a fight. You’re stuck with me, Bobo Del Rey.”

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep, Henry. Don’t you dare.”

“I’m not, Robert Svane.”

He feels the other shift so he can press his forehead against Doc’s. “I can’t…” comes the quiet admission, “I cannot do this again, Henry. I can’t.”

“And you won’t,” he tells him, “Not alone. I’m not gonna leave you. I’m not. I’m here and good, bad, or ugly here is where I’m stayin’. Trust me a little would you?”

“Do you know what you’re asking? Do you honestly understand what you are asking of me?”

“I’m asking you to let me have what’s left of you, yes. You hold all that I am as well if you hadn’t noticed. I love you, insufferable demon, so stop hidin’ from me because I ain’t nearly the scariest thing here in Purgatory. That’s you if you’ll recall.”

“Henry…”

It earns a soft sigh before he reaches and lightly brushes his fingers along the side of the other’s face. “I know you’re used to people leavin’ when you need ‘em most, Robert. But I’m not goin’ anywhere without a hell of a fight and so much fuss the devil himself would get out of the way. I promise. You have to trust me better.”

“Trust isn’t something I’m good at. I did that with Wyatt, remember? And you know what that earned me.”

“I know,” comes the soft, sad response, “I know, Robert. But I’m very, very much not him.” And he'd do whatever it took to convince the other of that and of the fact that at the end of all things with him is where Doc wanted to be. Robert had become his home and his reason. He leans and gently kisses the corner of his mouth. “One of these days I am hopin' that you'll start to believe me.”

[victorymunitions]

I’m finally gonna watch Wynonna Earp.

[blufarfalle]

Alex’s POV

          The sun is setting down painting the apartment in a gentle orange tone. I get up just to grab the bowl of popcorn and crash back to the couch. The next Wynonna Earp episode plays automatically causing the theme song break through the silence.

“I told that devil to take you back” I sing as I take as much popcorn in my mouth as I can.

*DING*

           My phone that is charging in the side bed table make me jump a little. Please be Kelly Please be Kelly Please. I repeat internally as I rush to it.

New Message

Kara: Karaoke night in the alien bar can you make it? Bring Kelly! :)

           I felt a pinch of disappointment but I don’t let it overwhelm me so I just simply replay:

Alex: Kelly is busy but I will try.

           Since Kelly left this morning I haven’t talk to her. She told me she was going to be busy trying to catch up with the new update of the VR lenses. However, I do want to see her. I don’t like being needy but I have to admit ever since she come to my life is been so difficult to stay apart. Her tenderness, her charm, the peacefulness that she emits. Her eyes.

Those big, soft, brown eyes that can take my worries away, alongside her hair, her skin…I need to see her.

           I pick the again the phone and open our conversation just to feel vibrate with a sound in my hand.

           She’s calling!

           I answer almost immediately

“Hey I was going to text you right now!”

           She laughs making me contain all the joy by just biting my lip. “Well as you said, we communicate without saying a word.”

“Yeah” I smile to myself… like an idiot in love.

“So what you were going to send?”

“No no first, how is work doing?”

           Kelly let out a heavy and long sigh.

“That bad huh?” my question come out full of worry.

“Not that much I’m almost done is just so tiring I need a break.”

“Aww baby. Well lucky for you, Kara invited us to Karaoke in the alien bar. Do you want to come? That’s actually what I was going to text about.”

“That sound Fun! But I need a shower.”

”Me too”

“Let me guess you still wearing the gray shirt and the navy blue shorts” Kelly chuckles.

“Is my first Sunday free in a while don’t judge me like that.” We laugh. “I was trying to catch up with Wynonna and you were right” I continue “I do kinda look like Nicole Haught with the new hair.”

“See!” she exclaims very enthusiastic “I will buy you a Stetson!”

“NO!” I almost scream.

“Yes!”

“Kelly!”

“Alex!” She says with the same authority voice. I don’t have anything other than laugh with her.

“Speaking of hats” I continue after the laugh finish “What if I pick you up in my bike so you can try the helmet?”

“Oh… uhm… I don’t know!”

           I chuckle a little “Are you scare?”

“I’m not scare! I’m just… uhm” She is short of words.

“Come on! it will be fun! I will go slow!” There’s a silence and I know she’s almost convinced.“You agree to be my riding partner! And if you don’t like it we don’t have to try it ever again!”

“Ugh! Using my words against me! Huh?”

“Yep!”

“Okay fine but be gentle!”

“Yes baby!” I say a little too proud.

“Well let me shower then and you should too! From here I can smell you UGH! So bad!” She jokes.

“Ha ha so funny”

“I been told I can be.”

“Anyway, yes I do need a shower see you in forty minutes?” I try to bring some seriousness to the conversation.

“Yes. Let me know when you’re on your way.”

“Okay bye” I say with those three words about to leave my mouth but I swallow them. It’s too much too soon and I don’t want to scare her away.

“Okay bye!” She says before hanging up.

           It takes me a while to snap out my favorite daydream, Kelly.

           After plug the helmet to charge I rush to the bathroom and after the shower, drying my hair that I realize one of the perks of having short hair is that I don’t need to spend too much time on it. It doesn’t take too long for me being in a black hoodie, dark jeans and some high sneakers.

           A couple of minutes later I wait for the bike to warm up underneath me while I holding the helmet in my hands.

“Kelly” her name escape my lips.

           She had lost so much and had to suffer in silence. I can’t imagine how would I react if something like that ever happened to me. Just the thought of not seeing her again make my eyes blurry, my heart break.

           I need to be careful. I know I can be pretty reckless, especially when driving the bike but I can’t make Kelly pass for all that pain again. I won’t let myself do it. Is not just me living a numb life anymore. I have a girl. A woman that feels just like home. And staying safe is what will assure I will see her again. I strap the helmet and lead my way out.

           Stopping for the green lights and keeping a legal speed I finally arrive around 30 minutes or so. I open the helmet up and I see her, standing in the sidewalk wearing a purple sweater with a denim jacket and dark jeans. Brown boots too.

“Hey sexy” she says  before bounce her helmet in her hands.

“Hey beautiful” 

 Kelly’s POV

 “Are you ready?” Alex ask with enthusiastic eyes.

“Uhm… sure”

“It will be fun! Here let me help you” She reach for my hand pulling me close. I put the helmet on and she lock the strap. The helmet is not heavy but I take a little to get use to feeling trap and let go of the claustrophobic sensation.

“Aww you look so cute and kinda badass. Oh! I need to take a photo!”

“Really?” I protest.

“Yes! Keep still!”

           I foolishly smile without realize the helmet was covering my mouth so instead I just put my thumbs ups. Alex lay a little back to take a better view.

“Adorable!”

“Yeah yeah can we go now?” I ask trying to hide the nerves.

“Well somebody is edgy” she mocks before chuckle. “We need to pair our helmets first.”

           Alex lay forward to press the buttons behind my helmet. I can’t help to got lost in her hazel eyes. She found my glaze and I notice her eyes go little as she smiles.  

“Can you hear me?” her voice sound softly from inside the helmet.

“Yes. Can you hear me?” I ask a little too astonished.

“Yes! Now our helmets are connected. If you want me to stop or anything you can tell me and I will.” An electricity rush through my hands when I sense hers on mine. “Don’t worry I will be careful!”

           I take a deep breath while I feel my nerves calming down. I trust her. I know she won’t do anything that could hurt me. Since I told her my worries and fears she have been no more than just understanding, gentle, assuring me she’s not going anywhere. That’s why I agree to go with her in the bike. She’s trying for me the least I could do is try for her.

“Pop in!” Alex helps me sit behind her. It takes me a while to get used to it. The sit is a bit elevated than hers so I have to laying forward to hold on to her. I pass my hands while feeling the softness of her hoodie over her abs. If I wasn’t so scare, I may say this is kinda sexy.

“You okay?” she asks.

“Yeah I’m just trying to get used to it”

“Okay let me know when you’re ready”

           I adjust the feet in the pegs and take a deep breath as she continues “You know we can hear some music if you like.”

“Nonono! I just want to hear you and I need to focus.” I replied. “Okay I’m ready.”

             Is not bad or so Alex doesn’t make it seems like it. She was being more than careful. Stopping slowly in the lights, telling me when she’s about to make a curve and the speed well, it has been a little too slow I been meaning to tell that she can go faster but-

“You okay? Do you want me to go slower?” she interrupts my thoughts.

“No baby is okay. I actually was thinking… can you go a little faster?”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes”

“Okay but let me know if it’s too much!”

           She speeds up just enough to make me hold on to her tighter. Now I can feel her breathing increase a little. Thanks to the noise cancelling I can sense her pulse too. Who would have thought I could feel so peaceful riding a motorcycle? Being honest is not the bike that make me feel like home, is Alex.

           I close my eyes and let my mind run. I can get used to Sunday evenings like this. Maybe Alex can teach me and we can go cruising together with our kids.

Our kids! The thought made my eyes pop open. I know she wants kids and so do I. I just never thought of it, not fully.

“You okay back there?”

“Mhm!” is the only response I can think about as I go back to that sweet thought.

             I’m not sure how long it took until we were parking. Alex helps me get out so she can do the same.

“That was fun!” I admit as I fix my hair after taking the helmet off.

“Really? You like it?” Alex seems to doubt it.

“I must confess I was terrified but you made it seems so smooth and fun… I loved it!” I move a little closer. Holding her by her hips locking my fingers behind her back. “Actually I was thinking if you could teach me?” She raises her eyebrows and the way her face lighted up with happiness is by far one of the most adorable things I had ever seen.

“Absolutely!”

“What about now?” I ask trying my sweet voice while keeping her close. She chuckles and take a step back. “Of courses baby!”

           I pass my leg over to sit down which make an expression on Alex face that seems like she enjoyed it more than it should.

“What now?” I try to hide the laugh with my seductive voice.

“Well now you turn it on” she plays back too, taking a step forward and making emphasis in those two last words. With the same line of seduction, I ask “How?” causing us to burst in laughter.

“Turn over the key and press this button” she points out the back circle in the right side of the handle bar.

“What’s that?”

“Okay yes I should give you a small tutorial”

“You think?” I mock.

           She points at my foot “Here on the left side is the gear lever and the peg. It goes down to lower the shifts, middle is neutral and up to lever up.” She leans over the gas tank to continue “In the right side is the foot break, that’s for the back wheel. You just push it down. Over here-“  She place herself in front of the motorcycle “-in the right side is the front break, is the one I use the most. The kill switch and the started. And when you move this, is the gas. In the left side is the clutch, the signal lights and the honk.”

“Wow you are so hot right now!” I confess startled by her. She gives me a smile and looked down to hide the blush. “Well not as hot as you sitting in the bike” she admits

“Oh I notices!” I laugh. I take a deep breath. “Okay! I think I got it!”

“Is okay I won’t let you fall. I’m here”

           I know she means from the bike but those words make my heart glow. I look away trying to hide the feeling.

“So-“  I composed myself “I put it on neutral like any other-“

“Yes!” she’s seems more excited than me. “turn on the key. Then switch the kill switch and then press the starter” she says as I’m doing it.

           The bike purrs and it feels quite powerful. I hit the gas a few times. “Okay calm down tiger” Alex says chuckling “Now take the stand off. Don’t worry I’m holding you” The bike feels more lose causing a sensation of flying. “Don’t be scare I’m here. Now hold the clutch and lever up the shift just once.”

           The bike moves forward and my heart pouts harder. But Alex hand is in the handle bar and the other in my lower back making me feel more safe. I’m temp to give a little more gas so I go for it but I stumble losing balance and falling a little over Alex. However, she promises me I would not fall and I didn’t.

“I got you. I got you baby!” she says calmly as I place my hand on her left shoulder making it more easy to keep balance. “Are you okay?”

“Yes!” I say laughing uncontrollably. “Yes I’m okay. I just never thought I could be so happy. You make me so happy!”

She smiles “You make me happy too!”

             We keep staring at each other for a few seconds and I can feel those three words dancing in the back of my head. It takes all my strength to hold them back, is too much too soon and I don’t want to screw this up.

           I notice her glaze change to my lips and that’s my green light to press mines to hers but she gives a little grunt.

“What’s wrong?” I ask.

“The bike is a little heavy.”

“Oh God! Baby I’m sorry!” I apologize as I get of the motorcycle and help her stand it up.

“Is okay no worry.”

           She passes her left arm around my shoulders when she’s done parking the bike.

“Thanks for the ride and the lesson” I say softly before giving a quick kissing in her cheek.

“No, thanks to you for being a wonderful girlfriend and a perfect riding partner.”

           She winks at me making clear the inner joke. I burst into laugh as we make our way into the bar.

[mtvswatches]

Wynonna Earp 1x09 Bury Me with My Guns On

Wynonna Earp 1x07 Walkin’ After Midnight

Spoilers disclaimer (please read before sending messages or writing comments.)

Click here for previous recaps!

Stray thoughts

1) Oh, wow…

This definitely reminded me of this…

2) “She is also a distraction I cannot afford right now.” Too late, Doc, you’re officially distracted…

#swoon

3) This is exactly what happened and I cannot be convinced otherwise…

But in all seriousness, it’s quite interesting how Wynonna finds herself chasing any kind of feeling now that she’s done with the rage and revenge. The problem is, no matter how many revenants she puts down, she’s never going to get her family back and she’ll never get the forgiveness she so desperately craves. She needs to come to terms with these facts, and she needs to find a new purpose now.

I also find it interesting how she doesn’t find it hard to open up to Doc. For someone who’s quite closed-off and who puts up all these walls, she opens herself up rather quickly with the people she cares about.

4) Holy shit, she’s not messing around…

5) Oooh, this is gonna be like “When She Was Bad”, right?

6) Wynonna is going to be psychoanalyzed on the day she decides to go bad. This should be interesting.

7) Man, this girl is all tough and shit but she definitely wears her heart on her sleeve…

DOLLS: We need to be careful, alright? You're not even a real deputy, Earp, come on.

WYNONNA: No. I'm just the one with the big-ass gun who sends the fiends of Hell to their deaths.

DOLLS: Technically, it's not the gun that kills them, it's…

WYNONNA: Oh my God! You stupid government lackey, you left me in there with a bureaucratic sadist and I was alone and scared.

DOLLS: You're not alone, Earp.

WYNONNA: Or a murderer.

DOLLS: Okay.

WYNONNA: Just once, I want you to say it. That you care about me. Pussy.

It’s kind of refreshing to see this type of portrayal of women, you know? She’s hard as nails but she’s also not afraid to express her feelings and show her vulnerability to others, and that doesn’t make her any less of a badass. You can be both, what do you know?

And not only did Dolls not tell her that he cares about her, but he also took away her badge. Uncool.

8) Oh, that’s a big promise, Wynonna…

That’s like calling bad luck, is all I’m saying.

9) OMG…

She made this poor dude piss himself. Guess the Bad Girl thing is already backfiring.

10) She finally got her way…

11)

What is Drek, other than the witch’s baby/son? Is he a Revenant or is he something else altogether? I’m thinking he’s something else. And what does she mean when she says they “will be gods”? All I can think of is she wants to sing in the meadows…

12) “Lord, girl, you need to blow off that steam.” Please tell me he’s going to bang off the steam out of her. Pretty please?

13) SWEET LORD JEBUS, PRAYER WORKS!

14) So… the Sheriff dismissed Nicole’s report of what she had experienced herself by defining “Purgatory” as quirky. Riiiight. But then, he picked up her report from the trash. So, he’s either waking up and starting to believe there are supernatural forces at work here, or he is the Sheriff because he’s been in the know and assigned precisely to dismiss any type of supernatural claims – a la Snyder in BTVS. Either way, I think it will be an interesting turn of events.

15) They are having two completely different conversations, and I love it…

NICOLE: Um, can we talk?

WAVERLY: Yeah.Yeah. God, we're totally overdue.

NICOLE: I'm not I'm not crazy, right? There's something going on here.

WAVERLY: No. You're not crazy.

NICOLE: Okay.

WAVERLY: I'm not sure I'm ready to get into it.

NICOLE: Why?

WAVERLY: Because it's different for me, right? And it's really personal.

NICOLE: But it's personal for everybody, right? I mean, they must know. People must whisper about it.

WAVERLY: My God, I hope not! No, I kind of only just discovered it. When I met you.

NICOLE: Me?

WAVERLY: Yeah. You're kinda special.

NICOLE: Okay, maybe a little bit more open- minded, but it's not like I have some mystical gift  or something.

WAVERLY: No, I get it. You're a lesbian, not a unicorn, right?

NICOLE: What?

WAVERLY: What?

“You’re a lesbian, not a unicorn” is such an iconic line. Also, there’s no reason you can’t be both, what do you know?

16) I still don’t know what Bobo is looking for, but I guess that’s it for Drek and his brother...

I’m guessing the reason Drek burned to death is that the Stone Witch used one of his brother’s bones to build him up, right? And who was Drek’s father? I wonder if we’ll meet him…

But I keep coming back to this question – what is Bobo after? What is this “lead” the witch promised him?

17) *heart eyes* *fans self*

18) So Doc still wants to kill the witch, even though he now knows it will probably kill him, too. But Wynonna is having none of it…

Get it, boy? She doesn’t want you to die, she wants to keep you around.

19) Why didn’t Wynonna run after Doc? He couldn’t have run that far away in 5 seconds…

20) I really enjoyed the whole conversation between the Sheriff – Randy – and Dolls. I think Dolls is a bit arrogant and he underestimates how useful Randy could be. I also liked how Randy admitted that he figured out the real reason Dolls had set up shop in Purgatory a long time ago, but he’d chosen to turn a blind eye because it didn’t really affect him and he strikes me as the type of guy who just wants to do his job, go home and have a beer. But now his own deputies – and friends – are getting hurt because of all the weird shit that’s been going on in Purgatory, and he won’t have that. So he’s decided to get involved.

Now, I’m not saying that he’s not honest about his intentions, because I’ve totally bought his whole “let’s work together” spiel. But I’m not dismissing but my other theory just yet. There’s still that guy who was a judge or something who had the picture of the seven, so the Sheriff could still be playing lackey to the higher-ups.

21) Waverly just told Nicole that maybe they can be just friends, and I’m like…

22) I LOVE HER…

23) Um, no, I don’t like this!

What the hell is going on? Is this some “I’ll fight my own battles” macho bullshit? Because I expect better than that from Doc. Or is it simply because he doesn’t want her to interfere with him killing the witch?

24) Can… Bobo smell that Doc and Wynonna had sex? That’s so creepy.

25) It’s really smart how Doc put Bobo into a no-win situation. He had to either let Doc go with the Witch or show his minions he wasn’t a man of his word, which would probably turn into a revolt against him. So he obviously chose the lesser of two evils.

26) What does Bobo mean by “I have a very special surprise for you”? What the fuck is he going to do?

27) I really like how supportive Gus is of Waverly, encouraging her to live her own life like she wants and with whom she wants, but I still don’t understand why she would sell the bar? And I’m afraid Bobo’s going to be the new owner. Is that his surprise for Wynonna?

28) Well, considering one of his minions just showed up at Shorty’s asking for Wynonna, I’m guessing that’s going to be the case.

29) I don’t like this…

WYNONNA: Who won't you make a deal with, huh? First a witch, then the Devil himself. You're nothing like… You're just nothing.

DOC: You can judge me all you want. What do I care for some broken woman's evaluation of my character?

There’s so much subtext here is overwhelming. First, there’s Wynonna unfinished line “you’re nothing like...” I think she was going to say something along the lines of “you’re nothing like I thought you’d be.” But that would’ve shown vulnerability at a moment when she didn’t feel Doc deserved it. So she hits him where she knows it will hurt him most. And he pays her back in kind by calling her a “broken woman.” But we know he’s not indifferent to Wynonna’s judgment of his character. On the contrary, it affects him greatly. He’s just probably trying to convince himself otherwise.

30) How many times are they going to point guns at each other in one fucking episode?!

31) So we finally know something about the origin of the Earp curse…

WYNONNA: Tell me about the Earp Curse.

CLOOTIE: The details are hazy, as that was my demon husband. Revenge for the death of our boys. Direct and manly and, quite frankly, boring.

WYNONNA: Not the first word I'd use.

CLOOTIE: Us girls like to take vindictiveness to the next level, don't we, Wynonna? And I wanted my own revenge on Wyatt, so I went after what Wyatt loved most. His best friend.

DOC: You're a liar.

CLOOTIE: I threw it a few juicy morsels like "health" and "longevity," and you were mine.

DOC: You tricked me.

CLOOTIE: When Wyatt found you buried in a whore's muff instead of underground, when he learned of our deal, his heart broke in two. Then I threw you down a well, so that even if Wyatt softened, came looking for you…

DOC: Did he?

CLOOTIE: And you got to spend decades in the dark, knowing your best friend despised you. John Henry. This whole time, you thought it was personal, but it's always been about the alpha dog.

DOC: You shut your lyin' mouth.

CLOOTIE: You're a good sidekick, dear "Doc," but you'll never be a hero. A perpetual second choice. But in the end, everyone chooses the lawman. Everyone.

So the Earp curse and Doc’s curse were two sides of the same coin, one cast by the witch’s husband and the other by the witch herself.

What I find the most interesting, though, is the fact that Doc was Wyatt’s Achilles heel. What did she mean when she said that Doc was what Wyatt loved most? I can’t help but feel gay undertones in that. I mean, why else would Wyatt be so hurt to find Doc buried in a “whore’s muff”? Were they ever romantically involved? I’m going with this theory and I love it.

Also, why did she look pointedly at Wynonna when she said that “in the end, everyone chooses the lawman”? Does this mean Wynonna will choose Dolls over Doc at some point? Because I don’t want that!

32) I love how Wynonna used their previous conversation to talk Doc out of killing the witch right then and there.

33) OMG they’re going to bury her in salt flats!

34) Yes!

WAVERLY: I've always wanted to do things that scared me. But, well, it's not so easy to be brazen when the thing that you want, that scares you to death, is sitting right in front of you. NICOLE: I scare you? WAVERLY:  Yes. Yes, you do. Because I don't wanna be friends. When I think about what I wanna do most in this world it's you. Oh God, that sounded so much more romantic in my head. Just jump in any time, Nicole, because I really, really don't know how to do this. NICOLE: Oh, sure you do. WAVERLY: Maybe I should just stop talking. NICOLE: See, you're getting better at this already. WAVERLY: Maybe you should stop talking too. NICOLE: Maybe you should make me.

I knew they would become a thing, but I really wasn’t expecting to feel so much for them? They’re super sweet together but also super hot, and I definitely got all tingly inside watching them.

35) So… we still don’t know what “the lead” is. We know what it is for, but we don’t what – or who? – it is. But I fear what Bobo might be able to do if he can break himself from the triangle and from Wynonna’s curse…

I really don’t know why they didn’t bury her completely. Oh, wait, is it because if they did, she would die and therefore Doc would die? Yes, that’s probably it.

36) Wynonna basically just asked Doc on a date, and I’m here for it.

37) So, Dolls faked a report of Wynonna passing the deputy exam or something.

38) Called it!

39) I guess that whole “no one’s ever taking anything from us again” thing instantly backfired, huh? What a packed episode, and there are only a few left in the season! I can’t wait where this all leads up to!

40) Hope you enjoyed my recap, and, as usual, if you’ve got this far, thank you for reading! If you enjoy my recaps and my blog, please consider supporting it on ko-fi.Thanks!

[iccarian]

a little help , please . ― @b4didea, wynonna.

no one has ever played her nerves like a poorly - strung guitar worse than wynonna earp. she is relentless, infuriating, and somehow always manages to wrangle herself and anyone close to her into trouble. but, against odds, nicole still (be)grudgingly admires those things about the eldest earp, among many other qualities. it's why she'll never refuse the call for help -- rare as it is, especially with a please at the end of it. ( being inseverable from the earp sisters is a fate she has long - since accepted. ) even when her lips thin and she still rolls her eyes in annoyance.

❝ i'm not even going to ask, ❞ she sighs, stooping down to grab the ankles of the thick - muscled revenant the heir downed behind the bar, praying no one sees the sheriff scurrying a body into the shadows with the town pariah. but what would it even matter at that point? ❝ i should have known as soon as i got that disturbance call, you'd be involved somehow. ❞ they shift awkwardly, bumping into the brick at her side, and nicole grunts as her arms strain. ❝ where exactly are you planning on putting him? ❞

[waterlilyvioletfog]

Top 3 Supernatural Episodes Per Season

Warning: Spoilers below the cut. I am SUPER biased. Take everything I say with a HEALTHY grain of salt. 

Season 1: omg they look like INFANTS

1. “Home” 1x09. This episode is amaaaaaaaaaaaaazing AND it’s super important to the mytharch AND we get Winchester family drama. One of those early instances of “Wow we need to give Jensen Ackles an emmy like yesterday”. Mary turns up and foreshadows like??? so much??

2. “Scarecrow” 1x11. Super creepy, major “The Lottery” vibes, fuck I just. I love it. 

3. “Hell House” 1x17. Close call between this one and “Something Wicked” but in the end, Harry and Ed and all the hilarity that ensues just. *chef’s kiss* 

Honorable Mentions: “Something Wicked”

Season 2:  ugh so many good episodes season 2 is SO good

1. “The Usual Suspects” 2x07. SAM GETS TO BE SO SNARKY IN THIS EPISODE AND I LOOOOVE IT. Also Diana is a bamf. 

2. “Croatoan” 1x09. UGH YASSSSSSS. Close call between this and “In My Time Of Dying”, though

3. “What is And What Should Never Be” 2x20. Look man, I don’t know what to tell you. I’m cheap as all get out. Dean angst? Gimme gimme. Also it has WYNONNA EARP IN IT.  

Honorable Mentions: “In My Time of Dying”, “Nightshifter” 

Season 3:  half of these episodes suck, the other half are perfect heeeelllppp

1. “Bad Day At Black Rock” 3x03. This episode it just hilarious from start to finish. Also, Bela vs. Dean. 

2. “Mystery Spot” 3x11. A double whammy of HILARIOUS and OH FUCK THIS IS DEPRESSING. 

3. “Jus In Bello” 3x12. It was real hard to decide between this and Ghostfacers but ultimately, Nancy Fitzgerald (aka Ella Lopez) and Victor Henrikson are the actual best and deserve all the love ever.  

Honorable Mentions: “Ghostfacers”, “The Kids Are Alright” 

Season 4: Somehow there is only one episode that is not stunningly amazing?? 

1: “On the Head of A Pin” 4x16. Cas becomes a main character and it is AMAZING and oh my god give Jensen ALL the emmys oh and ALSO we finally learn exactly what Sam and Ruby’s “extracurricular activities” entail. Feels like a movie. We get the reveal that the angels are working to break the seals. Anna is also amazing. Why is this episode so beautiful. I’m fucking crying and so is Dean. I could gush for hours. 

2. “It’s a Terrible Life” 4x17. This episode is just a fucking delight. (Am I giving it such a high score on the basis of The Kink’s “Well Respected Man” alone? Maybe. Honestly I SHOULD be putting Rapture here but oh well. I’m biased.) 

3. “Monster Movie” 4x05. It was hard to decide between this “In the Beginning” “Lazarus Rising” “The Rapture” and “Lucifer Rising” (which all deserve all the praise ever) but ugh ugh ugh this episode is ALSO perfect AND I love it a bajillion. It’s in black and white and the guest actress is SO pretty and also I think I’ve already gone into detail about how the MoTW is a Lucifer Parallel. Also Dean says he’s been rehymenated so TRANS!DEAN RIGHTS! 

Honorable Mentions: “In The Beginning” “Lazarus Rising” “Lucifer Rising” “The Rapture” 

Season 5: You want to be sad? You also want to watch really good TV? SEASON FIVE IS WHERE IT’S AT! 

1. “Two Minutes To Midnight” 5x21. I know, I know. I should be putting “Swan Song” here but look,, I am easily bought with the promise of Julian Richings as Death. 

2. “Free To Be You And Me” 5x03. Funny Destiel buddy cop film, Sam gets to be filtered through the eyes of an audience-stand-in in universe, also contains Castiel’s ICONIC line “but today you’re MY little bitch”. 

3. “Dark Side of The Moon” 5x16. Narrowly beats out “My Bloody Valentine”, “Dead Men Don’t Wear Plaid”, and “The Song Remains The Same”. I am trash for any pieces of Sam and Dean’s childhoods and also this episode gives me SO MUCH material for beating up John with a baseball bat. 

Honorable Mentions: “Swan Song” “My Bloody Valentine” “Dead Men Don’t Wear Plaid” “The Song Remains The Same” “The End” 

Season 6: We Don’t Talk About Season Six. 

1. “The Man Who Would Be King” 6x20. Cas. Destiel. Ow. 

2. “Mommy Dearest” 6x19. Eve! Sam Smith! idk, I just really like it.

3. “Appointment In Samarra” 6x11. As I said, I am easily bought with Julian Richings. Tessa the Reaper!!! Sam stop trying to murder your father. 

Honorable Mentions: “You Can’t Handle The Truth” “My Heart Will Go On” “Weekend At Bobby’s”

Season 7:  Terrible reputation given the fact that it has SO many great episodes. Sera Gamble? You’re mean. 

1. “Slash Fiction” 7x06. Why is this episode so hilarious???? Robbie Thompson starting out with a BANG!

2. “Plucky Pennywhistle’s Magical Menagerie” 7x14. In the total goop of “thick. black. ooze.” of this season, 7x14 is a light in the darkness. Every inkling of joy, of spark, of color, of childishness, all of it, poured out into this one episode, wherein Sam totally loses his cool and I love it. Sam looks so pretty at the end. Dean is simultaneously an actual child and an actual Dad and I love it. 

3. “Out With The Old” 7x16. I love me some levis, man, don’t know what to tell you. It’s just so fun!!

Honorable Mentions: All of Robbie’s episodes, “Hello, Cruel World” “Repo Man” “Reading Is Fundamental” “How To Win Friends And Influence Monsters” 

(The ONLY reason I’m not including TBAI is bc @mad-as-a-box-of-frogs is slowly converting me to hating Megstiel enough to not watch Destiel episodes) 

Season 8: That one season where we admitted that Crowley’s a DICK. 

1. “Hunteri Heroici” 8x08. CAAAAS!!! Also the only episode where anyone watching actually gives a shit about the Sam x Amelia flashbacks. 

2. “LARP And The Real Girl” 8x11. Super fun! CHARLIE RETURNS. Dean is a FUCKING NERD. Sam gets flirted with :) Real close tie between this one and Pac-Man Fever

3. “The Great Escapist” 8x20. Edlund really gave it his all for this last episode. Cas kicks SO much ass. Sam needs to be protected at ALL costs. Kevin ALSO kicks SO much ass. The actor who plays Sweet Pea on Riverdale is here??? Wow.  

Honorable Mentions: “Pac-Man Fever” “As Time Goes By” “Everyone Hates Hitler” “Trial And Error” 

(See note on The Born-Again Identity for why Goodbye Stranger is not on this list. Again, blame @mad-as-a-box-of-frogs )

Season 9: Sam is mad at Dean for not letting him go

1. “First Born” 9x11. No, I will not elaborate. Tim Omundson speaks for himself. There is nothing wrong with this entire episode and if you try to tell me there is I can and will gut you like a fish. 

2. “Heaven Can’t Wait” 9x06. DESTIELLLLLLLLLLLL. 

3. “Do You Believe In Miracles?” 9x23. Wow it’s the first Season Finale to make it to my top 3!! Metatron gets what’s coming, DEAN BECOMES A FUCKING DEMON. 

Honorable Mentions: “Bad Boys” “Mother’s Little Helper” “Alex Annie Alexis Ann” “Meta Fiction”

Season 10:  Dean is mad at Sam for not letting him go

1. “The Executioner’s Song” 10x14. See my comments on “First Born”. 

2. “Angel Heart” 10x20. BRING YOUR DAUGHTER TO WORK DAY. DESTIEL. JIMMY X AMELIA. COOL UNCLE SAMMY. DEAN IS A NERD. DEAN IS CLAIRE’S DAD NOW SORRY NO TAKE BACKS. (also, “blue eyes crying” is just ugh ugh ugh)

3. “The Werther Project” 10x18. SAMWITCH RISE!!!!!!!!!!! 

Honorable Mentions: “Hibbing 911″ “The Prisoner” “The Things We Left Behind” 

Season 11: Ahh, yes. You. Lucifer. Get fucked. 

1. “Don’t Call Me Shurley” 11x20. *slow clap* Robbie Thompson, you have served your country well. 

2. “Red Meat” 11x17. This is gonna sound strange, but this episode is sorta my comfort food?? I’ve watched it literally so many times. I love it. So much. 

3. “The Chitters” 11x19. Nancy Won wrote three episodes for SPN, all in season 11, they are all stellar. Chitters is GAY. She also wrote “Don’t You Forget About Me” and “Thin Lizzie” I’m putting them here so as not to crowd up the Honorable Mentions.

Honorable Mentions: “The Vessel” “Devil In the Details” “We Happy Few” “Baby” “Form And Void” “Into the Mystic” honestly just watch every non-bucklemming episode they are pretty much all amazing. 

Season 12: I WILL DEFEND MARY WITH MY LIFE DON’T @ ME 

1. “The Future” 12x19. DESTIEL. I would die for Kelly. Fetus!Jack. GOODBYE DAGON!! THE MIXTAPE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2. “Who We Are” 12x22. JUST KILL ME WHY DON’T YOU, BOBO?! WE ALL KNOW YOU WANT TO. 

3. “Stuck In the Middle (With You)” 12x12. Destiel love confession!!!!!! Drowley!! Mary will fight everyone willingly!! SAM GETS THE ORANGE JACKET

Honorable Mentions: Every. Single. Non-BL. Episode. Watch. Them. Now. 

Season 13: JAAAAAAAACK!!!!!!!!!!! 

1. “Advanced Thanatology” 13x05. *inhales deeply* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. Also, Steppenwolf. 

2. “Beat the Devil” 13x21. DICK JOKES GALORE. Also, we must protect Sam at all costs. Gabena is perfect. Samwitch is also perfect. Sabriel is also good. Lucifer can go fuck himself. 

3. “Breakdown” 13x11. It physically pains me not to put “Funeralia” here but alas, I must not show Steve Yockey too much favoritism. Anyways. DONNA!!! DOUG!! CREEPY!!! SAM’S HEART IS WORTH SO MUCH MONEY!! GIVE SAMMY A HUG!!

Honorable Mentions: “The Scorpion And The Frog” “Funeralia” “The Thing” “The Bad Place” “The Big Empty” “Lost And Found” 

Season 14: 

 1. “Moriah” 14x20. Proof that Supernatural will go down in history as ALMIGHTY. GOD IS THE ULTIMATE VILLAIN.

2. “Peace of Mind” 14x15. I still haven’t recovered. Jared must have had literally all the fun in the world. 

3. “Mint Condition” 14x04. Yay!! Very fun!!! (I wanted to put Optimism here, but again, I can’t show Yockey so much favoritism. It’s not my fault! he’s too good!!) 

Honorable Mentions: “Optimism” “Ouroboros” “Unhuman Nature” “Byzantium” “Damaged Goods”

[vodkabite]

I Never Thought That It Would Hit This Hard - pt.3

Waverly never really considered herself to be a lucky woman. Sure, she’s lucky to be alive and all that, lucky to be going to a good school and getting an education—but that’s to be expected. She spent the entirety of her life working nonstop to get here; slaving away over her books to be on the Dean’s List, double shifts at Shorty’s and tutoring on the side to be able to afford things. Everything she’s ever done was for the sole purpose of a karmic reaction; practically forcing the universe to repay her for all her good work.

She’s only twenty-one years old, and until recently, everything had gone as planned. Until the universe decided to shove Nicole Haught into her life; a glaring problem she never prepared for. And yet, here she was, essentially being forced to repent for being so selfish to think the universe owed her something.

But fuck, how can she when the redhead had tongue that works wonders against her skin, sinking her further into an abyss. How? Frankly, she truly is an Earp and is more like Willa than she would have ever wanted to be. Narcissism ran deep in their veins and for what it’s worth, she wouldn’t change a damn thing.

For now, at least.

Because Nicole happened, everything had become such cluster-fuck, she didn’t know where to start or end. Granted, Waverly had enough time between work, practice and class to think on whatever they were. Ultimately, it wasn’t just a one-time-thing only, she made sure of that herself after launching herself at the woman last week. The tips of her fingers still tingle with the feel of Nicole’s skin being split beneath her nails—the way her teeth left a glorious mark on her shoulder—they were indeed something.

Once is an accident, twice is coincidence, so what does three times make?

The third time is when Gus closes down Shorty’s so Waverly and her soccer team can celebrate their recent win over Remus Pointe. The affluent community nearby where the teams are dressed in expensive uniforms and practiced with soccer balls lined with gold. Obviously, the last bit isn’t true, but it made the party all the more fun. The bar is filled college students, more than usual, practically overflowing and that should’ve been a sign. The third time is Nicole showing up with a few friends to the party, wearing Ghost River University’s red and black letterman jackets. They came in peace, looking to just have some fun and of course, leading the pack is fucking Wynonna who immediately challenges everyone and anyone to a drinking contest.

A battle of wills that the older Earp easily won. Like narcissism, whiskey and bourbon ran through their veins.

Despite the drinking, Waverly stays sober. She knows Nicole came to the party for a singular purpose: to settle the score between them. Being drunk would lower her inhibitions and she’s sure, she’d end up on a pool table with the insufferable asshole. Because damn, her auburn hair is messy as it is perfect, and those honey-golden eyes feel like a hot brand on the brunette’s skin.

Even the way she drifts through the throng of college students dancing in the middle of the bar, smooth as silk, to get to her.

“That underhanded tactic of yours screwed me over last week during practice,” Nicole grits out an uncharacteristic snarl. A pinched aggression across her face, she tenses—shoulders rolling back with a slight rigidity—jaw tight. “Couldn’t focus and your sister pulled me out of the game with Alberta.”

“And, what?” Waverly shrugs her shoulders. “It’s not my fault you couldn’t keep it together because you kept thinking of me one upping you.”

Her words are careful, Nicole quirks a brow.

“Honestly, I expected a little bit more from Ghost River’s favorite shooter.” The biting sarcasm is thick on her tongue. She doesn’t relent. “Then again… Maybe you are just overhyped as your team’s win-loss record.”

“Got you to scream our first game together didn’t I?”

“Not much of an accomplishment if I was already hard up for it, remember?” Nicole’s own words are echoed back at her. “You losing your touch, Haught?”

“Never.” Nicole says with a lick of her lips. “Just regrouping.”

“Big word, you learn that in your European Lit class?”

“Keep talking Earp, I’ll be taking that mouth before the night’s over.”

Waverly scoffs, “You are losing your edge.”

“That wasn’t a threat, baby.”

The brunette twitches. “I’m not your baby.”

There’s that damned smirk again. Devious and prideful, like there’s a secret she knows that Waverly doesn’t. But Waverly doesn’t get to think too much of it when Nicole boxes her in against the wall, pain smarting between her shoulder blades. Pressed against her, height effectively shadowing the brunette in the corner of the bar and out of sight. Nicole murmurs, deceptively soft, “I want you to be,” before wrapping a finger into the empty belt loops on Waverly’s jeans and pulling her closer. There’s a split second of quiet between them, even under the blaring sounds of music, people laughing and chatting and the sounds of glasses clinking. It’s quiet.

But the moment doesn’t last, not when that tongue finds its place against the exposed length of Waverly’s neck. Waverly doesn’t say anything, too hyper focused to speak. Pulled between being looking out over Nicole’s shoulder and trying to keep as inconspicuous as she can in the darkness of the corner. And then everything swims when the button on her jeans pops open; the zipper practically ripped off as it’s pulled down.

The first time was nothing more than an accident based on adrenaline and frustration. The second was a sheer coincidence, the result of an overblown ego and the need to repair a damaged one. This third time is neither of those things. Jesus Christ, it’s a level of submission Waverly had never anticipated. Her hips jerk when Nicole’s hand slithers beneath the hem of her underwear, calm and collected, her touch isn’t tentative and gently as it was before. It’s rough and familiar just as its new and amazing.

It isn’t easy, the flat press of their bodies together, tangled and twisted—with Waverly’s hands fisted in sleeve and the at the back of the collar of Nicole’s jacket—the redhead slipping into her wet heat easily. A quiet gasp escapes Waverly’s mouth at the feeling, the slight burn of being stretched ignites a fever under her skin. Nicole’s lips work at the pulse on her neck, teeth scraping dangerously against the tender flesh and making Waverly wetter around her finger.

“Wet for me already?” Nicole smirks.

“Fu-fuck you,” Waverly struggles to push against the older woman, but it’s no use.

Her body is on fire, pleasure lancing through her spine with every thrust of the redhead’s finger. Swift and purposeful, each stroke meant to drive her higher. The party is still in full swing and the song blaring from the speakers overhead changes to one Waverly knows. Head unconsciously bobbing to the beat. Nicole is also familiar with it, lips mouthing out the lyrics against her throat, punctuating each line with a bruise.

“You put a sour little flavor in my mouth now/You move in circles hoping no one's gonna find out.” Waverly arcs her back off the wall, silently cursing and thanking to whoever decided to play Panic! At the Disco.

Her eyes squeeze shut as Nicole thrusts in time with the song, the heel of her hand grinding hard against her aching clit. Fingers gripping the smooth fabric of the expensive letterman jacket tightly as Nicole murmurs against the tight line of Waverly’s jaw. Lips wrapping themselves around that sensitive spot just above the jugular. The darkened bruise that blossoms beneath her mouth leaves the brunette breathless, lungs desperate for air until the redhead’s teeth release her and she’s able to breathe again.

“A pretty picture but the scenery is so loud/A face like heaven catching lighting in your nightgown.” Nicole shifts her hand further into Waverly’s pants, a quick thrust shoves her in deeper than before.

Waverly wants to say that they shouldn’t be making a habit of this, at any point in time someone can easily just glance in their direction and see, know. For God’s sake, Wynonna, as oblivious as she is sober, is alarmingly observant drunk. The absolute hell that would befall this entire bar if the elder Earp found her star shooter and baby sister like this. Not to mention that Gus had a fully loaded shotgun beneath the counter.

This was never a part of the plan.

Considering that being driven to an orgasm in the middle of a crowded bar with her classmates, teammates, friends, aunt and abrasive older sister, all around her is as dangerous as you get, it’s also very exciting. Weighing out all rationale, because with the devil that is Nicole Haught working her fingers into the tight heat of her sex, there’s really no room for it. Her unwillingness to accept defeat is another factor in the heavy, lust-filled haze clouding her mind.

And then, it happens. Another finger is worked into her and the stretch has her seeing stars behind her eyelids, she cries out beneath the music and bustling of the party, but Nicole is on her immediately. Swallowing her cry hungrily.

Author’s Note: Here it is, the unpublished/never finished chapter 3. As you can tell, I pretty much checked out of writing the fic because Dirty Mind became more time consuming. Also, the lyrics Nicole is mouthing are from “Miss Jackson” by Panic! At the Disco.

[awol-newt]

another wayhaught fic

it's like marrow without bone (to live in a house with no home) Maybe God is God. Maybe the Devil is me. Well, I'll just throw my chains on. And tell myself that I'm free.   - Delta Spirit, "Salt in the Wound"

“I just wanted to be free.”

Nicole knows that voice. It sends chills down her spine as quickly as it makes her blood boil. She knows that voice because she heard it before she got shot.

A WayHaught fic.

“I just wanted to be free.”

Nicole knows that voice. It sends chills down her spine as quickly as it makes her blood boil. She knows that voice because she heard it before she got shot .

(The first time. Not… not this time?

   Huh.

       Where’s Waverly? Wynonna?

           Where is she ?)

“You’re in purgatory,” the voice tells her and she whirls around in a fury, brown eyes narrowing as she takes in the sight of Willa Earp. And then she takes a moment to take in their surroundings.

It’s the sheriff’s station. Lonnie’s desk is still a mess and Nedley’s office door is propped ajar. Her own desk still has two binders, a stack of case files, and a mountain of paperwork on it. The small AM/FM radio clock flashes like it might after a loss of power.

It’s the sheriff’s station and it’s empty. There’s no Nedley or Lonnie or Dov or Chris. There’s no Nash, either. There’s nobody but Nicole and Willa.

She feels it now. The stillness of the air and the heaviness in her chest that threatens to turn into something like panic. She closes her eyes and counts to twenty, inhaling for five and exhaling for five until she feels calmer. When she opens her eyes, she hopes to see Wynonna and Waverly staring at her like she’s lost her mind; it’d be better than the reality, which is cracking an eye open to see Willa staring at her with an aura of impatience and maybe something like resentment.

“You aren’t dead. Yet,” she says. It’s so blasé, the way those words come out of her mouth and the sigh that follows.

Nicole pales and shakes her head. Shakes away the unnerving feeling settling in the pit of her stomach.

“Where are we?” she asks.

Willa rolls her eyes. “I already told you. We’re in purgatory. You know, that annoying place between Down There and Upstairs.”

“Purgatory,” Nicole says again. It isn’t a question this time because she remembers now. Being shot. Again.

Charles Gagnon had marched into the station and pulled a gun on the room, demanding his brother be released from their custody. Henri Gagnon had been arrested the previous night, swerving down Main Street drunker than Wynonna after a shit day. The damned hoser had sideswiped Nicole’s cruiser while she was responding to a 10-71 of suspicious activity at the bank across from Shorty’s. His saving grace was that she hadn’t been in the vehicle when he took off a layer of paint and her side mirror. His downfall was that he panicked, stopped his own car, and tried to make a run for it.

He was caught, of course. She’d marched him down the block to the station, tossed him into the drunk tank, suspended his license, and wrote him a fine. The rest of the night was procedural — dealing with his car and her cruiser, the headache of paperwork that such an incident incurred, and trying not to fall asleep during the last hour of the graveyard shift while she sat at her desk handling said paperwork. Especially since she had to turn around and come back to work that afternoon.

Such is the life of a sheriff’s deputy.

But getting shot — again? That is a hazard of living in Purgatory where just about everybody owns a gun or has access to one. Not to mention the crazies and the supernatural.

Charles Gagnon fell into the former category. A little off his rocker with a short fuse and serious co-dependency issues with his brother. When he began waving the gun around, it was Nicole who stepped forward with her hands raised and her movements as unthreatening as she could make them. She walked slowly towards him, putting herself between Waverly and the madman.

“Let’s just talk this out, Charles,” she had said gently.

She tried to follow the handbook and her police academy training. They’d roleplayed scenarios with gunmen and hostages. And after the situation last year with Wynonna, Shorty, and Champ, she had attended a two-day seminar in the big city with a TAC team. Except none of those things prepared her when he pulled the trigger anyways.

She remembers pushing Waverly to the ground and Wynonna drawing Peacemaker. She remembers falling and another gunshot and then Waverly shouted her name. But then…

Oh.

She fell. The floor was cold and it felt so nice because her shoulder was burning and aching. And then Waverly was there, her Waverly, scrambling to lean over her. Her hands went to Nicole’s shoulder and she pressed. Hard. Nicole screamed. And then…

Then she was here. With Willa freakin’ Earp.

“And she remembers.”

Nicole scowls. “Do you have to be such an asshole? I’m apparently dying and I don’t even know if Waverly and Wynonna are okay!”

Willa’s face softens at the names of her sisters. “They’re fine,” she tells Nicole. “They’re both fine. Wynonna shot the guy who shot you.”

Despite everything that happened following Willa’s return, despite having every reason not to trust her, Nicole believes her. It’s a reassurance that she needs to hear, and it allows her room to consider her current situation more clearly.

“I’m dying,” she murmurs. It’s barely audible but it feels so incredibly loud. Those words. “I’m dying.”

“You’re not dead, yet,” Willa reminds her, gentler this time.

Nicole’s eyes widen.

“I can go back?”

She begins to scan the room, looking for any bright gateway or swirl of lights so she can steadfastly spring in the exact opposite direction. Willa must recognize what she’s doing by her darting eyes.

There’s a sigh and a shake of her head. “It isn’t a choice. This isn’t like on television. It’s out of our control.”

“Is that why you’re still here?”

Nicole blinks and suddenly they’re standing in the Pine Barrens near Purgatory. There’s a heavy layer of snow on the ground and it continues to fall with flurries dusting the evergreens and the branches of the trees that dropped their leaves long ago. It’s quiet and beautiful.

She can’t feel the cold or the wind that rustles the branches and sends them swaying just barely.

“This is my purgatory,” Willa says. “I’ve been here since I crossed the border, since Wynonna…” She trails off, never completing the sentence.

Since Wynonna shot her. Since her sister shot her. Since she made the most foolish mistake of her life. Since she lost everything.

“I just wanted to be free,” she says again, even softer this time.

Nicole recognizes the weight in her voice. Has heard it in her own voice so many times throughout her life. It’s the heaviness of regret, of exhaustion, of sadness, and of defeat. It’s the pull of so many, I’m sorry’s that can never be enough to do what’s been undone.

“Free from Daddy, from the Earp curse, from that godforsaken town. From remembering what I had and what I had lost. Free from having to be anybody but Willa. I just wanted to be free.”

It’s a desperate explanation. It isn’t an apology or imploring for forgiveness. It’s the story of a young girl who had to grow up too fast and be too much too soon, who found pain and darkness in every corner of her world.

Nicole knows something about that. It’s a tale with which she’s very familiar. She isn’t sure she ever really knew what light was until she met Waverly and fell in with Wynonna and got to know Nedley and the rest of the town. Until she found a place that felt like home and people she could call family.

But Willa— Willa never got that chance. To really get free from the machinations of souls older than both of them combined. To find her own light somewhere out there.

She looks at Willa out here, a bright spot of life, morose as she may be, in this vast wilderness and unending white only speckled with forest green and ash gray tree trunks and limbs. And when she blinks again, they’re back in the empty cop shop.

“I wish you’d had the chance to be free without being such a shithead,” Nicole finally says. It isn’t forgiveness but it is understanding and maybe a tinge of sympathy.

Willa laughs. It’s rough and sharp and sounds like it hurts her as much as it disquiets Nicole. “Yeah,” she says. “Except I didn’t have the chance and now I’m here. Waiting for the Universe to decide where I belong or if I’ll never belong anywhere except purgatory.”

“I don’t think anybody belongs nowhere,” Nicole offers, though the optimism sounds uncertain even to her own ears.

Willa shakes her head. “No, it’s okay. I have to pay for my sins somehow, right?”

The sadness is clearer now. The despair and defeat that clings to the once heir. It holds tight to her, suffocating like a python’s constriction; each gasp for air brings you a little bit closer to death.

“I’m sorry it wasn’t different.” Nicole means these words.

“Me too.”

It isn’t absolution but it’s something. The grip of sadness loosens just slightly.

There’s a buzz beneath Nicole’s skin. Like the tingling of a limb falling asleep when you sit or sleep funny.

“Do you feel that?” she asks Willa.

And Willa looks at her and cants her head to one side. It’s a Waverly-sort of mannerism, and Nicole feels a sharp tug at her heart.

“The tingling and that chest pain?” she clarifies when Willa doesn’t respond.

The hum of her body grows and grows and it’s starting to become really uncomfortable. It feels kind of like what she imagines being lit on fire might feel like.

“They’re saving you,” Willa finally tells her. “The Universe. My sisters.”

“I’m… I’m not going to die?”

Nicole’s jaw tenses with another lance through her chest.

“You’re not going to die.”

Willa’s voice begins to fade, sounding distant against the blood roaring in her ears. The edges of her vision start to go black as the pain increases exponentially. She hears Willa speak to her one more time and she strains to listen as she squeezes her eyes tight and feels herself begin to fall over.

“Look after them, okay? Tell them that I love them. Both of them.”

And then she wakes up with a jolt, her eyes snapping open to meet the most beautiful hazel eyes she’s ever known.

“Waverly,” she breathes. And it hurts. It hurts and she’s alive.

There’s a steady beeping of machines next to her and her left arm is slinged. Her head is fuzzy and all the lights are soft but she’s alive and Waverly is safe and so is Wynonna and Willa is marginally less awful than she’d thought before she got shot. Again.

“Nicole. You’re awake,” Waverly whispers with a bright smile and tears in her eyes.

“I’m here, Waves,” she says and she can hear her words slur, loosened by whatever drugs they’re pumping through her veins. “I’m alive.”

“You almost died, Nicole. Again. Again! You’re like a cat with nine lives, I swear, Officer Haught.” She pushes from her chair next to Nicole’s bed and paces the length of the small room. She’s exasperated and Nicole can tell she’s a little angry, the emotion warring with the elation that Nicole is awake and alive.

Alive and awake.

“I saw Willa,” she mumbles. “In purgatory. That’s where I went when I was waiting to live or die.”

Waverly slumps back into her seat and reaches for the hand of her not shot-up arm. “What are you talking about, baby?”

She feels the medication even more saliently now. She has to fight against it, the fog that wants to cloud her brain and pull her back under. Part of her is afraid she won’t wake up again.

(It’s going to be a thing, isn’t it?)

What she tries to say is this: “I saw Willa in purgatory. The real limbo, between heaven and hell kind of purgatory. She said she just wanted to be free and I kind of understand that. She wants you to know that she loves you, both you and Wynonna. And she asked me to look after you guys.”

It doesn’t come out that clear and concise but Waverly’s smart and Waverly knows her girlfriend and Waverly knows how to piece together drunken, slurred speech like nobody else. She gets the message and her eyes tear up even more than before.

“She said that?” she asks and the question is so, so soft and scared and hopeful.

Nicole’s head dips in a nod. “She said that.”

Waverly wipes at her eyes and laughs a sad but happy laugh. The words are a lifetime too late but they do mean something. They do begin to patch the hole in her heart that’s been torn through with so much grief and trauma and loss. She laughs again.

“She’s still the worst,” Waverly grumbles.

“Totally the worst.”

Waverly holds tight to Nicole. It’s enough of an anchor and a promise that it feels okay to drift away for just a short while. She’s got Waverly to tether her down so she can float away to dreamland and not fly too far away.

Nicole dreams of falling snow and the smell of evergreens and feels the warmth of a crackling fire in a hearth. She dreams of three little girls with smiles on their faces as they run happy and free.

[fragrantnovember-blog]

Title: Dainty and Delicate in Blue 

Characters: Doc Holliday, Wynonna Earp, Constance Clootie, Alice Earp-Holliday, Wyatt Earp

Premise: Doc is spending some quality time with Alice, but things quickly take a turn for the worse.

Content Warnings: Cuts, hanging, death, guns, kidnapping, violence, nightmares, religion, storms

Author’s Note: so.... this was supposed to be good and fluffy and wholesome. maybe a page, or a page and a half. and then i started writing and everything went horribly, horribly wrong. it’s a whopping 5 pages in google docs, single space. please don’t kill me we fandom. i didn’t intend to make this. 

John Henry Holliday held the small bundle in his arms close to his chest. Alice had been fussy all day, and since Wynonna was helping Waverly and Nicole plan the wedding, he didn’t want to call and bother her. He wasn’t exactly sure how to use the iPhone Jeremy had given him, either. It seemed like witchcraft, that you could touch glass and the pictures would just appear, and despite knowing otherwise, he was not inclined to test the waters and prove his fears correct.  As he lost himself further and further in his reprieve, he felt his daughter squirm against his chest, a small yawn escaping the blankets. Adjusting her so that he could see her whole tiny face, Doc sighed and ran a finger down her cheek. “Hush now, papa’s here,” he cooed, gently bouncing the infant. Alice’s face contorted, causing his heart to jump, only for it to be comforted when she opened her eyes and let out a squeal of joy. Doc smiled, offering his finger to her, and almost physically feeling his heart melt when she grabbed it with delight. “Feelin’ better?” He looked down at her, and wiggled his finger and her arm. “I know, angel, I know. Wynonna’s been gone all day and you’re hungry. I’ll request that she leave us a bottle next time.” Forcing himself to take his eyes off of her, Doc looked around the living room of the homestead for one of Alice’s many toys. He found the rattle “Auntie Way” had gifted Wynonna during her pregnancy and handed it to her, so he could have his finger back. The infant looked at the noisemaker with confusion at first, but quickly squealed when she grabbed it and discovered the noise it made. Doc chuckled. The sound of his daughter’s laugh was like music to his ears. He was completely and totally wrapped around the infant’s little finger. He could just picture her growing up. She’d have Wynonna’s hair and eyes, and his wildfire burning in her heart. He wanted to teach her how to shoot, how to start a fire, how to bluff at poker, anything her little heart desired. He wanted to pick her up from her first day of school, and listen to her talk about all the friends she made and her homework. He wanted to take her to a father-daughter dance. He wanted to be there for it all. He looked out the window, only to notice that dark storm clouds had overtaken the once sunny sky. He leant down and gently placed Alice in her crib, taking care to ensure her head was supported. He walked over to the window, his eyes scanning the dark horizon for any sign of trouble. He could tell something was wrong. He looked back to the crib, only to feel his heart stop when he saw that Alice wasn’t in it. Panicked, he ran over and threw the blankets around. He overturned the crib, the couch, anything big enough that she could have even possibly hid under, but there was no sign of his daughter. “ALICE!” He screamed. It was like everything that mattered was melting away right before his eyes. Outside, he heard thunder crack and a high pitched, harsh laugh. He spun around, only to see that the wall had vanished, and before him stood Constance Clootie, holding his precious daughter in her arms. “Oh, good doctor. Surely you didn’t think you could have all this?” She gestured, and he watched in horror as the homestead turned back into the old, decrepit place it was before Wynonna came back to town. When he looked back to the Stone Witch, she was gone. In her place was Wynonna, hanging by the neck from a rope attached to the rafters, all seven of the revenant hunting party that’d killed her father and her grandfather before him standing beside her, readying themselves for a picture. “You sonsabitches-” Doc hissed, reaching for the guns at his waist, only to find that they were gone. He looked down in shock and turned around to find Constance holding the guns and the ring she had tasked with giving him his immortality in one hand, and his daughter in her opposite arm. “Looking for these?” Constance smiled, only to turn to Alice and coo when she started to cry. “Oh, don’t worry, honey. Your new mommy’s gonna get you fed, just as soon as she takes care of daddy.” “Don’t you touch her, you cantankerous bitch!” Doc spit, readying to lunge himself at the Stone Witch. “Ah ah ah,” Constance warned. “One more step, and this precious baby won’t live to see the next morning.” She grinned, evil dripping from every tooth in her mouth. “You understand, don’t you, Doctor Holliday? The price must be paid for the gift I gave you. You surely didn’t expect me to do it for free, did you?” “You give me back my daughter, or I swear I’ll hunt you to the ends of the earth and-” Constance cut him off. “And what? You’ll bury me in the salt again? Oh, John Henry Holliday, don’t you know when to give up?” The dark clouds outside began to swirl, thunder growing ever louder. Constance looked over Doc’s shoulder and her eyes lit up with a wicked glow. “Ah, that’s our cue to leave. Well, Holliday, it would seem I’ll have to take care of you another time.” “Oh no you won’t!” Doc shouted and lunged for the woman, but she was gone before he could even land a punch. He stared at the spot where Constance had once been, in complete and utter shock. She was gone, taken his baby girl with her. Everything he ever loved, everything he cared about, slipped from between his fingers like water from the faucet. He looked up to the rafters. Wynonna’s body was still hanging there, motionless and stone cold. He felt the tears burn in his eyes, his entire body shaking like a leaf. He blinked, trying to get the tears to go away, but when his eyes opened, Wynonna’s body was gone. He looked around, confused and panic stricken all at once. Then, he heard a familiar voice whisper into his ear. “Doc,” It called. “Doc, how could you?” He spun around, and his eyes went wide with fear. Before him stood Wynonna, his Wynonna, but her eyes glowed bright red. Across her forehead was a cut, with one vertical line and two perpendicular lines. It glowed as if she was made of fire, like it was burning just under her skin. She tilted her head, her beautiful hair sliding into her face. “W-Wynonna?” Doc whispered, his eyes wide with fear. “Doc, don’t you recognize me? Don’t you recognize your handiwork?” She laughed. It was a wicked and twisted sound, unlike the one the living Wynonna made. “This is what you do to us, Holliday. You’ve been killing and disappointing and letting down Earps for centuries. Look.” Suddenly, on her hip, was baby Alice. She had a burning scar and eyes to match Wynonna’s, and let out a mournful cry. Then, next to her, was Wyatt. Doc’s best friend, his first connection to the Earps. He, too, had the mark and eyes to match the rest of the Earps. Doc took a step back, his fight or flight instincts kicking in. “N-No-” He spat out. “No, this can’t- This can’t be. No!” His wide eyes flicked from one Earp to the next, finally settling on his sweet, sweet daughter. “Alice-” “You let her go. You took her eyes off of her.” Wynonna interjected, taking a step forward. “When she needed you most? You let her down.” Wynonna looked to Wyatt, who removed Peacemaker from his holster. “It’s time to pay up, Doc.” He said, aiming the gun at Doc. “It’s time to pay for your sins.” The barrel lit up, but instead of its usual yellow light, it glowed red, as if hellfire was going to burst out. “N-No! You can’t- You can’t send me back there, please- I’ll fix this! I’ll get my girls back-” Doc stuttered, saying anything he could to avoid where he knew Wyatt would send him. “They’re not your girls anymore, John.” Wyatt pulled the hammer back, resting his finger steadily on the trigger. “Wyatt- I’m sorry!” Doc cried, the fear on his face evident. “It’s too late for sorry. Make your peace.” Wyatt looked stone cold, giving nothing to his once friend. He pulled the trigger, and the shot rang out. John Henry Holliday jolted up in his bed. He was panting, sweaty, and positively shaken. He looked around his room, taking in the same blue walls, the same wooden bedframe, and his same hat hanging off a hook on the wall. He brought a trembling hand up to brush his hair back out of his face. It’d all been a dream. An amazing dream gone horribly, horribly wrong. The revenants, Wynonna, Wyatt, Alice, all of it. He wasn’t sure how to feel about, let alone how to process, what he’d just awoken from. It was like everything he’d ever feared was a reality, and it was all because he’d given his immortal soul to the devil. Suddenly, a sharp ding came from his bedside table. Doc looked over and grabbed his phone. It was a text from Waverly. Something was wrong with the roof of the homestead, and a possum had fallen through the chimney. Poor thing was scittering around the house and had scared Nicole half to death. Doc sighed, a small smile playing at his lips. Whatever had happened in his dream was just a fiction of his subconscious. He slid open the phone, and shot back a quick response. “On my way.”

[ao3-feedwayhaught]

Take you Back

by sweetshotofkerosine

After the death of Xavier Pamela Dolls, Wynonna tries to drink herself to oblivion in the woods. Kinda angsty, very minimalist, and filled with Tell That Devil lyrics.

Words: 585, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: Wynonna Earp (TV)

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Major Character Death

Categories: F/F, F/M

Characters: Wynonna Earp, Xavier Dolls, Waverly Earp, Nicole Haught

Relationships: Xavier Dolls/Wynonna Earp, Waverly Earp/Nicole Haught

Additional Tags: Minor Waverly Earp/Nicole Haught, Xavier Dolls & Nicole Haught Friendship, Season/Series 03 Spoilers, Canonical Character Death, Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Grief/Mourning, Established Xavier Dolls/Wynonna Earp

source http://archiveofourown.org/works/16214489

[top-shelf-waverly]

Wynonna Earp | Tell that devil to take you back

(made by the talented HillaryWhiteRabbit on Instagram and Devianart)