#| nothing too long so we can actually do stuff this month. |
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NPD BPD combo will make you feel like a starving wild circus animal every time you remember other people exist
#ok to rb#vent tw#it's like. we have a member who has NPD proper as cohost now#so our BPD and NPD symptoms have been combined into one worse thing#and it's baby's first Real Narc Crash and Ive been having RSD inflicted panic attacks every day#and I'm getting really fucking exhausted so the point where Im thinking stuff like 'I wish I could kms rn but that'd be too shitty and I#know this shit has to get better eventually because it has before so Im just#trying to relax#and in this case it's not like I have imo a compelling reason like my friends are all paying a proportionate amount of attention to me#to the energy for friends they have to give like I'm not being NEGLECTED#but I am so attention starved it's actually insane#and if it were just that itd be fine but I'm pmsing and Ive been losing sleep#from a mix of medical issues and exotraumatic nightmares#so I'm just. I'm absolutely Fucking Miserable#and its nobodies fault so instead of getting pissed off at someone Im just pissed off at everyone and no one at the same time#I just want to feel special again but its like. even if I DID feel comfortable asking for more attention#1. It wouldn't feel genuine and nothing my friends could easily do would stop it from not feeling genuine#2. I've been cluster B long enough to know that this stuff has to sort itself out naturally#asking for vallidation can be good at the right times but when I'm wanting to rely on it most thats when I need to find something else#but genuinely IDFK anymore man like I'm too tired to do shit I feel like all of my energy this month has been#STOPPING myself from doing stuff so when I try and think about what I actually Want To Do I feel so obstructed and exhausted I feel like#there's nothing fulfilling rn bc my stupid ass brain is like why find joy in anything if everyone hates you and you don't matter#(<- literally no one in my life has even implied this but. that's just how mental illness goes sometimes)#I just need to hang on until this narc crash is over and my friend groups aren't in the middle of like#2 million different things we're all struggling with stopping us from hanging out very much#I do think this happens every winter though#Ironically I love the winter weather and the rain and cold and gray (idk if I have SAD but if I do it's for the summer)#but I never enjoy the season like I want to because it's the most busy time of year so everyone is stressed out and doesn't have much time#to vibe like I want to so I end up just feeling pretty miserable until the slow time of year when people can relax more#It's usually like
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Thank you for letting me know:) Could you (if you get the chance) please write Grumpy Rafe x a like really sweet, shy, adorable like innocent reader? But like he finds her really cute? Could be anything else you want! I just like grumpy x sunshine :)
hey babe! Sorry this took me so long to get to, I hope u like! This is my fav rafe trope
“This is such bullshit.” Rafe grumbles.
Of course his plans had been derailed. Big empty house, summertime, pretty girl to himself, of course his friends dragged him away.
Your head peeks from the bathroom wall. “Hm?” It struggles out, your lips coated in toothpaste, your mouth occupied with a dangling toothbrush. You look so cute in your little outfit, he feels guilty for wanting you to get back into your pajamas. To forget your friends ever texted you at 9:30pm on a Saturday with Drinks? ;)
His hand waves in the air dismissively. “Nothing.”
You nod, slipping back into the bathroom to finish your tasks.
He rifles through his drawers messily, unsure of what he’s actually looking for. “Goddamn Kelce.” He mutters, quieter than last time. “Goddamn Topper.”
He can’t believe his perfect plans have been ruined, can’t believe he’ll have to share you. His head shakes in disbelief as he quits with the drawer, moving to wait for you by his bed. He cannot go out tonight.
You pop out of the bathroom, toothpaste replaced by a softer, pinker, shine to your lips. Rafe represses the urge to thumb at it as you walk over to wrap your arms around him tightly. Ear pressed to the warmth of his shirt covered chest, you can hear the aggravated thump to his heart.
“M’sorry.” You mumble.
He pulls back until your face is in view. His fingers work to smooth a piece of your hair. “For what?”
You lean into the touch. “I know you didn’t want to go out tonight.”
Oh. He can’t hide the distain crumpling his features. “No,” he grumbles. “I don’t.”
You smile weakly. “But we‘ll have fun.”
“You will.”
“Not if you’re miserable.”
He sighs, greatly heavy, shaking his head. “I won’t be miserable.”
“Really?”
“Yeah,” His eyes roll. “as long as you sit on my lap.”
He nearly preens at the sound of your laugh. “I don’t think the bar stools are big enough for lap siting, baby.”
He deflates dramatically, his head falling to your shoulder. “Than what is the point.”
You smile, though he doesn’t see, his eyes hidden in the softness of your dresses sleeve. “Getting some drinks with friends who wanna catch up.” Your hand comes up to scratch his scalp the way he likes. He does preen this time.
He’s silent, breathing in the scent of the moisturizer he’d bought you last week. He grumbles incoherently.
“Me too.” You nod. You feel him grin against your shoulder.
Lifting his head, he ducks down, eye level with you. “Let’s just stay home, baby.” He whispers, nosing at yours.
Your eyes flutter, the hopes of a kiss working it’s way in. “You know we can’t do that.”
He sighs softly into you. “Why not?”
��Because,” You start with a pout, your hands sliding from where they rest on his waist, up onto his warm grumpy cheeks. “You haven’t seen Top in a month,” his nose twitches. “and he misses you.”
“Please don’t bring up Topper when I want to kiss you.”
You laugh, warm and syrupy, flushing at the insinuation of kissing. “I get a kiss?”
“You always get a kiss.” He breezes, leaning down to press his lips to yours.
It’s soft and sticky, a string of your pinky lipgloss connecting you two obscenely when you’re the one to pull back.
“R’you wearing the sticky stuff?” He murmurs.
“Yes,” you nod quietly. “It lasts longer.”
“So I’m gonna have pink shit all over my lips for the next thirty minutes?”
“No,” You giggle quietly. “a wet cloth will do the trick.”
“In that case.” He shrugs, leaning down to reward your lips with three rapid kisses before a fourth, longer, softer kiss.
You stifle a smile when he pulls back. ��What?” He grins.
“Your lips are all sticky.” Your thumb wipes some shine from the corner of mouth. He puckers his lips.
“Maybe it’ll make me as pretty as you.”
Your nose wrinkles at his corniness.
“Or maybe I need more.” He leans in.
You push his face away from yours. “I can’t kiss you when you’re like this.”
“Lovely?” He murmurs. “The nicest boyfriend ever?”
“Corny.” You laugh at his offended expression, shrieking when he tackles you to the bed. “You maniac!”
He pulls your hair from your eyes, the gesture softer than your loud shriek moments before. It’s quiet as you breathe in tandem. His eyes rake over you appreciatively, and something in your belly twists for another kiss.
“I think” he starts,dropping his face down to nose at your collarbone. “I wanna kiss you again.”
Your eyes droop, the warmth of his body and love seeping into you. “I think” you start like him, murmuring into his ear. His ear tickles from the warm air. “I wanna stay home.”
“I did it!” He pops up, his arms caging you in.
Your chest rises in rapid giggles. “Shut up!”
#rafe cameron#rafe cameron x pogue!reader#rafe cameron x y/n#rafe cameron x kook!reader#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron x you#rafe x reader#rafe cameron imagine#rafe fanfiction#rafe x you#rafe imagine#rafe x y/n#rafe fluff#rafe outer banks#rafe cameron blurb#rafe cameron x female reader#rafe cameron x reader fluff
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Each Other
Natasha Romanoff x Female Reader
You always know what Natasha needs
Note: it’s just some soft stuff. Enjoy!
Natasha Masterlist 1, Natasha Masterlist 2, Natasha Masterlist 3, Main Masterlist
“Hey baby,” you say as you lean on the doorframe of Natasha’s home office.
She spins around in her chair and smiles up at you. You never tire of seeing that beautiful grin.
“Are you saying hi to me or the actual baby?” She jokes.
“Both of you.”
You walk further into the room and make grabby hands for your six month old daughter. Nat hands her to you, knowing she’s hungry and wants to see her other mom.
You kiss her forehead and hold her against your shoulder. She presses her head against your neck and whines softly.
“I know, sweetheart,” you coo, trying to soothe her a bit. “Are you coming, Mama?”
“Soon,” Nat replies. “I need to finish up a few things.”
“Don’t take too long please.”
“Wouldn’t dream of it.”
You share another smile with your wife and leave to go feed your baby girl. The process takes a while, but the bonding is very much worth it. She is ready to burp by the time Natasha makes it to her nursery.
“Let me do it,” she says. “You’re still work clothes and we both know this girl will spit up all over you.”
“Thank you, honey,” you reply. She usually makes fun of the pet names but today she doesn’t say anything.
She helps the little girl burp and does in fact get covered in spit up in the process of doing so.
“You okay?” You ask her.
“Oh yeah, I love being covered in this,” Nat says dryly, but not seriously.
You take Ali back and feed her more. Nat sits on the arm of the rocking chair you’re sitting in.
“No, I mean are you okay?” You ask, placing a hand on her thigh. “You haven’t teased me about the pet names since I’ve been home today.”
“I know,” she says. “I think I’m too exhausted. I’m sorry.”
Her voice sounds distant and worse for wear. You hate seeing her like this.
“Hey, come on baby tell me what’s going on,” you say. “It’s just me.”
“It’s nothing.”
“Natasha,” you warn. She knows she needs to just be honest. You already can tell something is off with her.
“The team needs me to go on a mission,” Nat admits.
“Oh.”
“And I know we discussed me having a whole year of desk work once Ali was born,” Nat continues. “But this one is just out of my control. I’ve been working overtime to try and figure a way to get the intel I need without going.”
“But it’s not working,” you finish for her.
“No it’s not,” she agrees. “I’m so frustrated.”
“Natasha, you can’t always fix everything.”
“But I want to,” she says unreasonably.
“I know, baby. It’s going to be okay.”
You lean your head against her arm. It’s the best you can do for now as you juggle an eating baby in your arms.
Ali finishes and Nat takes her back into her arms. You go to the living room to sit together. Nat puts Ali in her play chair.
You two sit together and watch her giggle and play.
“Call Steve and the team,” you say after a few minutes. “Tell them you’ll go on the mission.”
“But-“
“No buts,” you interrupt her. “I can handle baby girl. And you won’t rest until you’ve figured this out.”
“You know I love you, right?” Nat asks.
“And you know I love you, right?” You counter.
“It’s one of the few things I’m sure of these days,” Nat says.
“Come here, Natasha,” you say, holding out your arms for her to fully snuggle into.
You kiss her lips softly before she snuggles into your chest. You hold her tight for as long as she wants.
Everything will be okay as long as you have each other.
#natasha romanoff x reader#natasha romanoff#soft natasha romanoff#natasha romanoff fluff#natasha romanoff comfort#soft mama nat
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Dolcezza Extra II
Read Dolcezza here | ~2.4k words
From me: something sweet and sexy
Warnings: smut, oral, and nothing else except some fluffy bits
Summary: She's had a long day and Harry wants to make it better.
There was a knock on her door immediately followed by Harry’s key unlocking the door. Harry always knocked even though she assured him it wasn’t necessary. “Jus’ want you t’know s’me,” he shrugged when she told him. She glanced up from her desk to see Harry enter. “Hey Principessa,” he smiled tiredly. A double at the restaurant on a Saturday was brutal. But it was especially brutal during the holiday season when people flitted in and out between shopping for gifts and getting holiday dinners done with extended friends and family.
He looked exhausted.
She knew the feeling.
“Hi baby,” she smiled. Even if he was tired, he was still really pretty and lovely. She didn’t know he was going to come up after his shift. Sometimes after a double, he wanted to go home and shower. But today he seemed to be in need of some snuggles.
She was still working. Which made Harry a bit insane. On a Saturday night. She could see it in his eyes as he crossed the room. His exhaustion slowly replaced by worry for how much she was doing. What did she prioritize today that resulted in her being unable to do something she loved and had to catch up on work at a late hour? Did Emma have a math assignment she needed to look over? James and Ethan needed her help with cleaning? Or did her mom ask her for help booking a hotel for the family wedding in the coming month?
Harry hated his double shifts not only because he couldn’t see her, but because he couldn’t take her control (just a hair) so that she wouldn’t end up working at eleven at night on a Saturday. “Bad day?” She asked.
He rolled his eyes. He was tired, but it wasn’t a bad day. Honestly, he had fun at work. He and Niall worked well together so unless it was busy and understaffed, it never felt much like work. “No, kitten. M’annoyed you’re working.”
She dropped her gaze. “I like working,” she reminded him.
“Shouldn’t be working at eleven at night,” he reminded her.
“Well, I was going to read but then I was really into this plan I’ve created. I wanted to make sure I got it done before I lost my train of thought. The data I’m looking at has this really cool model and I was analyzing it, and it looked like it was trending down, but I think it’s actually trending up—” She stopped mid-sentence, her cheeks turning that beautiful shade of pink that Harry fell in love with. “Sorry, you’re tired.”
He smirked. “M’jus’ glad y’didn’t stress yourself doing stuff for your family.”
She looked at her lap. “Do you want me to be honest?” She sighed softly.
He sighed rubbing his hand over his face. “Principessa,” he tutted.
She frowned, fidgeting her fingers while Harry sat beside her. “They’re just so helpless Harry.”
“I know, kitten. But they’re all adults.”
“Barely,” she grumbled.
Harry sighed, pulling her into his lap and kissing the top of her head. He was glad all that had happened in this apartment didn’t deter her from living in it. Harry loved this apartment. Loved that it was right above him while he worked, that she was never too far away from him. “How much time do y’need?” He asked rubbing the back of his head. He didn't want to give her time. But he wanted her to be happy. Work did make her happy and he knew she would feel guilty if she didn't finish it and it would spiral into her worrying more anyway.
“Twenty minutes.”
“Twenty. I’ll take a shower. Then we can go t’bed, yeah?”
She nodded. “Sounds like a plan,” she pressed her hands on either side of his face and brought her mouth to his. “You made garlic bread and didn’t bring me any,” she frowned licking her lower lip.
He snorted. “Niall told me t’leave,” he shook his head. “He’ll bring some up when he’s done cleaning up.”
She smiled delightedly. “I have the best life,” she sighed dreamily, falling back into her swivel chair dramatically. Harry kissed her forehead.
“Don’t work too hard, Principessa.”
*
Harry enjoyed the warmth of the shower and felt a little more like himself when he returned to her in the living room. Her eyes still focused on her screen; the pinch of her brow puckered in complete concentration. “Um...any chance you’d be okay with like ten more minutes of me working? Emma called me because...well, I don’t want to bug you with the details, but she needed my help and—”
Harry knew whatever it was, she was putty to her younger sister’s request. She was too sweet, his pretty princess. “S’fine, but m’gonna help,” he turned her desk chair, so she spun to face him. She frowned.
“Hey, I was—”
He ignored her protest and lifted her from the chair to the desk lifting underneath her thighs. Harry was glad she was wearing her sleep shorts. The ones with an impractical slit on either side of her hips. A T-shirt that didn’t match swam around her frame. One that she bought because it was easily three sizes too big.
“Harry,” she tried again, steadying herself with hands on his arms as he gently pushed her laptop away from her reach followed by the notebook and pen she used to jot down her notes and to-do list. “I was—”
Harry watched her eyes and slid his hand up the inside of her thigh, through the leg opening, and pressed his fingers right past her underwear, between her folds, and directly onto her clit. Cutting her off with a gasp. “You were what?” He asked softly. Even if she wanted to talk she couldn’t. “M’jus’ going t’take care of you, Principessa. Y’do too much for everyone else. S’only fair.” Her heart rate was flying, and it mirrored the rapid fluttering of her eyelashes as Harry searched gently between the soft sensitive skin between her thighs. “S’that okay?” He asked.
She nodded breathlessly.
“Good,” he sighed. “Love t’take care of you,” he murmured and knelt down so his head was between her thighs. “Y’okay, kitten?”
She nodded again. “Please,” she whispered shyly.
“Aw, y’don’t have t’beg, Principessa. I’ll give y’anything y’want,” he winked, tugged the fabric that was in his way from between her thighs, and then pressed his mouth to her center. She gasped leaning forward, threading her fingers through his hair for balance. His locks were still damp from his shower, and she knew she would mess up the curls and flow from messing with it before it was dried. She hoped she could blame it on bed head.
She supposed in some ways it was bed head.
She moaned quietly as his mouth devoured her. Suckling and licking at her just the way she liked. Harry loved to be between her thighs. It was a regular part of their foreplay, and it never ceased to amaze her how deliriously good it felt. His lips and tongue were sinful. The man was so sweet looking and downright boyish with his cheeky sweet grin. For fucks sake he called her a princess in another language. “Y’can moan louder, baby. Y’know it’s soundproof,” he murmured kissing her thigh as he spoke to her before he wrapped his lips around her clit.
Just like that. Her sweet boyfriend was anything but sweet when he said stuff like that. When he swirled and lapped at her clit the way he was. It was dizzying.
She whined pulling on his hair to press him harder against her core. He moaned against her as she did. The vibration caused her body to react instinctively. Her thighs tightened around his head, and he moaned again. “That’s good, Principessa,” his voice was practically thoughtful. “So good, kitten. S’that feel good?”
She nodded. “Yes, yes, yes,” she whispered the repeated word as if it was all the same syllable.
“You’re so good, Principessa. Jus’ want t’make y’feel good,” he nipped at her inner thighs while he spoke his breath cooling off her wet skin. She was simply soaked between her arousal and Harry’s mouth. “All jealous ‘bout garlic bread," he teased, shaking his head. "Y’taste better than anything we make,” he mumbled and traced his tongue down her slit then back up, running a tantalizing circle around her clit again. Her eyes actually rolled back in her head. She thought that was only in books and for dramatic show in movies. She didn’t know Harry could really make her eyes look for the back of her brain. He sucked hard on her clit making an obscene slurping noise that would have embarrassed her if her place wasn’t soundproofed to near silence. Although she thought the moan she released could have broken the barrier. “Y’make such sexy noises, kitten,” he groaned and continued to torture her with pleasure.
“Harry,” she gasped.
“What Principessa? Y’close? Y’want me t’make y’come?” She nodded shamelessly; wanting it so bad she thought she would cry if he denied her (as if he could ever dream of denying her anything). “M’jus’ going t’touch—”
She cried out as he pressed his finger into her. His lips wrapped around her clit while his tongue continued circling around the sensitive nub. He rubbed his finger against her walls, once more feeling around expertly, the way she liked that made her toes curl.
The smug son of a bitch smiled against her as she clenched lightly around him. “That’s it, Principessa. Want you t’come all over me,” he moved his finger in and out at a faster pace timing it with his licks so that she was nearly worried she was going to pass out from pleasure.
“Oh fuck, yes,” she whimpered, and Harry groaned right against her.
“Keep going, baby,” he hummed fingering her and licking her like it was the only thing he planned on doing. “There it is, good kitten,” he praised which only made her melt into a puddle.
Her orgasm seemed to last way longer than she thought possible. Her thighs kept squeezing around him after it officially stopped. Like she was trying to hold onto the final waves of pleasure. “Do y’want another?” He inquired thoughtfully once more.
Another orgasm, especially of that caliber, would definitely make her pass out.
“No thank you,” she whispered.
He chuckled and kissed the inside of her thigh. He pulled her clothing back into the correct position and he sat in her office chair before he pulled her into his lap. She could feel how hard he was through the shorts he was wearing as she fell into his hold. He kissed her neck, wrapping one arm securely around her waist. The other hand found her inner thigh, slightly sticky with sweat, arousal, and Harry’s saliva. It was hot and messy, but Harry didn’t seem to care. Probably because he was responsible for the mess. Instinctively, she squeezed her thighs again, against his hand. “Y’sure, Principessa? M’happy t’make y’come again,” he offered kissing her cheek. “Y’seem a little turned on still?”
“Just... it felt really good. It’s,” she blushed and smiled at him shyly. “It’s lasting a while,” she mumbled and tucked her face into his neck.
His quiet laugh shook through his chest and her in his embrace. “You’re so pretty,” he murmured. “Especially when y’come.” She shook her head against him, but her thighs betrayed her again. “Let’s go t’bed, Principessa.”
She perked up a bit. Her eyebrows knitting together to meet in the middle of her eyes. “I think it’s your turn—”
“Oh no,” he shook his head. “Some other time. That was purely for you,” he stood, holding her legs around his waist. She blushed, giggled softly.
“Harry, you had such a long day. It’s hardly fair.”
“Not 'bout being fair. Plus going down on you s’by far one of m’favorite things t’do," he shrugged one shoulder.
Her cheeks still felt warm. “You’re pretty good at it,” she nodded in agreement.
Harry chuckled. “Cute.”
He walked to her bedroom, setting her on the bed. “I really needed to finish a few things—”
“It can wait ‘till the morning.”
She sighed. He was right. Harry was good at making sure she was doing more for herself. Although that usually entailed him doing stuff for her. Which didn’t seem like a good trade. Harry opened her main door briefly. He returned to the bedroom holding out the garlic bread immediately to her lips. With his free hand he cupped it below her jaw to catch any crumbs that didn't make it into her mouth.
“I really do have the best life,” she sighed, crunching on the bread. He smirked.
“Do y'want more?”
She shook her head. “I love you,” she sighed dreamily.
He laughed and kissed the top of her head. “I love you.”
Harry put the garlic bread in her kitchen, turned off all the lights, and came back to her bedroom. “Let me brush my teeth. Garlic isn’t pretty.”
“It doesn’t bother me,” he assured her, cupped her face and kissed her as passionately as he could. Like it was their first kiss. Or the one they shared the first time they had sex. The kind of kiss she imagined would greet them on their wedding day, whenever that would be. He pulled away briefly, pecked her more softly, then kissed her forehead. “Delicious,” he promised, licking his lips cutely.
Harry went to the other side of the bed and pulled her to his body as soon as he was settled. His arms wrapped tightly around her, his lips on the back of her head, kissing her hair. “Are you sure you don’t want me to do something for you?”
“M’always turned on by you, Principessa. Don’t worry ‘bout it. Jus’ taking care of you.”
“But you had a long day.”
He shrugged. “M’feeling fine. Don’t worry ‘bout me, kitten. I promise.”
“I worry about—”
“I know,” he chuckled, squeezing her closer somehow. His body wrapped around hers like vine. “Go t’sleep, Principessa. Y’can go back t’being an angel tomorrow and taking care of everyone under the sun,” he sighed.
She shook with silent laughter. “Thank you.”
“No need to thank me, kitten. I get jus’ as much pleasure out of that as you.”
“That can’t possibly be true.”
“If y’let me do it again, I’d definitely come,” he shrugged one shoulder and he kissed the back of her head then tucked his face into the crook of her neck. “I love you,” he reminded her.
“I love you,” she sighed.
“Sleep tight, Principessa.”
For a few moments there was no noise except their quiet breathing. “Harry?”
“Hmm?” She squirmed awkwardly. “Do you want another orgasm, now?” She shook her head. “More garlic bread?” A swift nod. He chuckled untangling himself from her. “One minute, m’love.”
“God, I am the luckiest girl in the world.”
--
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If you like this, check out my masterlist here
#harry#harry styles#harry styles fluff#harry styles smut#harry styles angst#harry styles blurbs#harry styles blurb#harry styles reader#harry styles x y/n#harry styles x reader#harry styles imagine#harry styles au#harry styles one shot#harry styles concept#hs#hs fic#hs writing#one direction#one direction writing#dolcezza
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Best Friends Brother|MYG
Description: Your best friend's older sexy brother. The older one. Smart. Intelligent. The one who advises you about life ever since you were a kid.
Warnings: age gap, reader is 20, Yoongi is 27, Soft Dom Yoongi, Mentions of insecurity indirectly, Unprotected sex, slight fingering, appreciation, nipple sucking, after shower after care, cute stuff?
-------------------------------------------------
You and your best friend Mina were now eating pizza and sharing reels to one another, meeting after a long time and having big plans.
But this is what you were actually doing.
Nothing.
But it was comfortable.
Mina's phone ringing interrupted you as you looked at her lazily picking up the phone and putting it to her ear.
Just like Yoongi, you thought.
You shook your head, it had been too long since you met him. He's probably busy with some music projects in Seoul.
Meanwhile you and Mina went to different colleges and met up like this after a long long time, fixing your schedules when free.
"Oh you're here? Sure sure, yeah", You heard her say, as you curiously eyes her. She was getting up after cutting the call.
"It's Jungkook, you know the guy who was three years our senior?", Mina said and you nodded still confused as to where this conversation was going.
"Yeah, the jock guy", You replied casually.
"Well I've been going out with him for a while, and he's outside.. I'll be back by the night?", She asked but didn't really ask as she was already putting on her socks after jeans.
"I didn't even know how long you've been dating? Is he good? Seemed like a Playboy back in the day", You asked completely not expecting that. She hasn't told you she's been dating for a while?
"Three months, will see you. I'll probably be late cover for me yeah?", She said leaving you alone in her house.
You were supposed to catch up, watch a scary movie at night, do your face mask and stuff. Just you and her.
But in these two years ever since you joined colleges you've been drifting apart, it's no secret.
She can feel it, you can too. Always inseparable during school, best of friends and all that shit just going into trash as soon as you joined.
Your personalities were really different and in the back of your mind you already saw this coming.
The bell rang making you frown, no one was supposed to be here.
Her parents have gone out for the weekend hence your plan of staying, her brother's in Seoul and she possibly can't be back so soon.
She clearly stated that she'd be back by night.
You walked to the door, your over thinking ass wondering if it's a serial killer as you opened the door.
It was quite the opposite. It was Yoongi. With a big ass suitcase. Dresses in dark blue jeans and a yellow T-shirt.
He looked handsome.
"Hi, uhm long time", You mumbled stepping aside giving him a way in.
He was also surprised to see you, hoping for his mom to answer the door.
"Yeah, how you doing?", He asked walking to his room casually as multiple questions popped inside your head.
Why is he here? Is he staying? Did something happen at work? Is he good?
He looked like he lost a lot of weight. He walked back inside probably after keeping the suitcase as you filled a glass of water for him to take.
"Thanks uh, so where's everyone else? Didn't expect you here", He asked drinking his water in one go as you leaned on the counter across him just like he was.
"Your parents are out for the weekend, and I was uhm with Mina, she uhm... She's out buying some snacks for us, I was supposed to stay in your room since Mina snores", You said as he gazed at you nodding at your words.
"Yeah, I didn't really tell anyone so..", He said shrugging at the end and you nodded taking in his words.
"Why don't we sit down?", You walked to his room because Mina's was really quite messy, not like he would mind she was his sister but you just thought it'd be better.
Less messy and probably more comfortable for him, he's back after like an year? Or even longer.
After you were settled down on his bed and him beside you leaning at the headboard you asked.
"Is it fine at your work?", You said looking at him. He was just looking up. He looked pretty, his cheeky cheeks and pretty feline eyes.
You missed this. Sitting like this and talking about life with him.
"It is yeah, although it was getting too much, felt like I wasn't getting a break. So another producer offered me to take off for like a month or two", He explained smiling slightly making you smile.
"Sounds good Yoongi, you got good colleagues", You said following his gaze and staring at the ceiling. Many star stickers pasted on the ceiling.
Back when Yoongi and Mina shared a room and Mina wanted a starry ceiling, her room was their store back then. Then she turned 8 and got her personal room.
"I do, what about you? How's it going at college?", He asked the question you dreaded. You didn't know whether to ramble to him how shitty everything is, the last was two years back.
When you were 18 and were about to start college.
But now things are different. Yoongi has always been smart but he looked even more mature, having work experience too now.
"It's fine", You said but Yoongi could tell it wasn't.
You were different. Introvert. Never opened up to anyone really. He didn't like that you weren't even telling him things like you used to. But then again he was the one who was focused on work never taking a break. Less calls. Less texts.
"Mhm, made many friends?", He asked and you looked at him to find him already looking at you.
"Not really but I'm fine", You shrugged.
"You miss Mina?", He asked.
"Of course I wish she was in my college would've made things easier but that's okay too", You said. You never said it out loud. Not to Mina because every time she talked about her college. She was always doing so good.
"Mina would've come back by now", Yoongi mumbled checking the time and you sighed.
"Look, she's with a guy. Please don't tell your parents, will be back by night", You bit your lower lip waiting for him to react and he shrugged.
"Should've told me Y/N, she's an adult now. Although she shouldn't have left you alone", Yoongi said.
He noticed the pained expression that took over your face, scrunching his face and cocking his face to the side giving you the look.
You sighed. "We've just drifted apart I guess", You let out, rubbing your forehead slightly.
"Impossible, you were so close", Yoongi retorts totally shocked and you smiled slightly.
"We have, ever since college started, she made new friends, a boyfriend, she's having her own adventures that the boring me could never suggest", You chuckled slightly hurt. You thought she'd always choose you even though you can be really constant about your life.
"You literally made her jump roofs", Yoongi exclaimed and you immediately groaned at the memory of the 14 year old you.
"Not that adventure, the smoking, clubbing types. I've never been that kind of person Yoongi, you know it and she has always been an extrovert", You explained a little frustrated.
"Then she's choosing shit if that's what she wants, what about you", He asked.
"I have been the same, not many friends and all, I just miss Mina and I miss you", You said looking at him as he sighed.
"You're really awesome, just don't think you're boring or stuff because your adventure isn't Mina's cup of tea", Yoongi explained and you smiled. Always good with his words.
"You know I'm sometimes jealous of her, because she's so good at it. At communication. Like she's forgetting about me and here I'm stuck with her memories", You chuckled at the realisation that you were saying this to Yoongi.
"Mhm and?", Yoongi asks as you bite your lip. He surely knows you to the point that he understands when you want to say more but won't because you think he'd judge you.
"And, she's good with guys. Don't get me wrong, they come back. And the guy I dated. God he made me feel horrible. Like I wasn't a good fuck, had me scarred for life I guess", You let it out and laughed afterwards masking the hurt with it.
"And you believed him? Didn't even try anyone else? Maybe he was bad at it yanno?", Yoongi argued knows you too well to know you're hurt. Knows you're an overthinker.
"I couldn't try someone else", You said a force in your words, your eyes on him, his on yours, his eyebrows furrowed.
"Why?", He asked.
"Because, I-", You leaned over placing your lips on his.
He's been talking for too long, knows you're fucked. He looks so pretty doing nothing. You just can't help when he's so close to you after so long.
Fuck the besties code that you and Mina never talked about. About not being with each other's siblings.
Your hands settled around his neck as he started moving along your lips after a while. It got hot and wet after a while as you devoured each other.
Yoongi has always liked you, you were so different and adventurous and good at talks completely opposite of what you just told him.
And when you kissed him, for a second he thought he was simply imagining it but here you were gripping on his collar as his hands sneaked around your waist.
You pulled back out of breath.
"Because every time I'm with a guy, you're on my mind. Yoongi would've listened better, replied better", You said pecking his lips in between your words as he just stared at you baffled by your actions.
"Would've touched me better", You said placing yourself on his lap.
"Shit you gotta reply to me Yoongi", You said grinding on his crotch as Yoongi took your hands pushing you back and climbed over you.
"God do you have any idea what you're doing?", Yoongi said as your heart beat fastened inside your chest at the proximity. Your actions registering in your head as you got red and red. "Never took you the one to be so reckless", Yoongi pointed out his lips finding your neck making you gasp.
"Yoongi", You whined as he started un buttoning your t-shirt trailing kisses along it making your skin burn as he reached in between your breasts.
"Was so glad when I saw you open the door", He mumbled against your skin softly making you whine.
"Yoongi, I"- You gasped when he took your nipple in his mouth. You didn't wear a bra knowing only you and Mina would be at home.
"You're so pretty baby, Mina is just stupid", Yoongi says leaning back sitting up and removing his T-shirt.
You both half naked, your cheeks red, chest heaving up and down as Yoongi traced your tummy and grabbed your boobs making you hiss.
"So sensitive here", Yoongi cooed coming down to lick your nippled and suck on them as you pulled on his locks slightly making him groan.
Giving both of your nipples a good suck he trailed his kisses down, biting and nipping on your skin making you whine out.
"So loud, all for me bet that boy didn't worship this perfect body", Yoongi said toying with your waistband.
"Yoongi please I want you to touch me", You whined out as he pulled down your trousers along with your panties.
"I am touching you", He said and you whined making him laugh at you, his gums showing.
He spread your legs for his eyes to see, his laugh fading and his eyes darken when he looked at your cunt.
"You want me so bad, don't you? Look at you baby, so fucking messy, all for me", He said his right hand leaving your leg and coming down to your pussy pushing a finger inside.
"Fuck yes, Yoongi. All for you ", You mumbled your breath catching in your throat and he pumped his finger in and out making you moan.
"I know", Yoongi murmured pulling down his jeans along with his boxers and holy fuck. You've never seen anything so big, not in porn, never in real life.
He was big and thick and perfectly long.
"Yoongi you're so beautiful", You moaned out feeling the need for him to be inside. "Please put it inside me", You said seeing slight pre cum leak out at your words.
"You have no idea what you're playing with, you want me so bad yeah?", Yoongi said pressing the head of his cock to your clit rubbing it up and down.
"I'll cry if you don't", You said out of frustration, not thinking before you spike making Yoongi grin.
"Would love to see that, will see that someday", He said pushing his full length inch by inch inside you as you opened your mouth and closed your eyes. Taking him in.
"Shit Yoongi, you're so so so big", You said out of breath and Yoongi leaned down pressing his lips to yours.
You could feel his veins rub against your pussy walls as he shifted slightly making you wince.
"So tight, so fucking tight. My fucking pussy", Yoongi rambled and gave you a long, slow but powerful thrust making you gasp.
"Yes, yes yours. God feels so heavenly", You said as he started thrusting in and out.
His dick filling you so well, reaching deeper with every thrust.
His hands holding yours above your head as he thrusted inside your pussy repeatedly and harshly.
"Yes yes yes yes Yoongi Yoongi Yoongi Yoongi Yoongi", You chanted like a mantra making him groan.
"Whoever said this is bad can fuck themselves, this is the best. Made for me. Mine", Yoongi growled sitting on his heels pulling you towards him holding your legs up as he thrusted inside you violently.
"Holy fuck, fuck, yoongi. Yoongi. Yoongi. Yoongi. Yoon- ah fuck - gi", You moaned feeling the knot in your stomach tighten.
"Fuck yes, tell everyone who's making you feel good. Who do you belong to baby? My pretty baby", Yoongi moaned his thrust getting sloppier and faster.
"You Yoongi", You cried out. "I am gonna"-
"Me too", Yoongi growled.
"Inside, Fill me, I'm on pill", You moaned feeling your orgasm wash over you and feeling overstimulated as he thrusted and thrusted until he came inside you with a groan.
Leaning his body over yours, sweat beads coating his forehead as he kissed you sweetly.
"You are so beautiful", Yoongi said, his voice deep and soft as you smiled.
"You are such a talker when you fuck", You said as he pressed his forehead to yours as you both laughed.
"You make me say things", Yoongi replied, both of you tired but had the biggest smiles on your faces.
"I love your smile, always have ever since we were kids", You mumbled taking his face in your hands and tracing your fingers over his gums.
"Ahan, is that so?", Yoongi asked and you giggled.
"Mhm, let's take a shower?", You asked making Yoongi get up as you both took a shower together. Bathing each other and talking.
"It's not a one time thing, don't overthink", Yoongi murmured drying your hair with a hair dryer.
"I know Yoongi, I'm looking forward to us", You said smiling at him wearing his t-shirt and shorts as he smiled back.
You both laying in your bed, your head on his chest, your arms up in the air as you measured your hands silently.
"You're so small", Yoongi exclaimed and you huffed.
"I'm taller than Mina", You said nuzzling your face in his neck bringing your hand down to wrap around hin.
"Never took you as the cuddly one, can live like this forever", Yoongi said making you smile.
"I know you're tired and want to sleep though, sleepy baby", You said.
"Baby? I'm like 7 years older?", Yoongi mocked and you both laughed. Glad that his age was not a matter of concern but something you were joking about and you hope it stays the same.
"okay baby", You teased, your laughs never fading as you both slept in each other's embrace.
A/N: you can lmk about my errors yk I'm like really new to this😭
#bts smut#yoongi smut#taehyung smut#jungkook smut#jimin smut#yoongi#min yoongi#bts ot7#bts fanfic#yoongi ff#bts ff#jeon jungkook#kim taehyung#bts jin#v bts#bts jhope#bts suga#bts taehyung#bts v#bts x reader#yoongi x reader#bts army#bts#bts jimin#bts jungkook#hoseok smut#namjoon smut#bts namjoon
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open goals
lena oberdorf x bayern!reader
part one here - part two - part three here
summary: love wins at bayern munich
warnings: angst, one mention of childhood neglect, this part is very long too, enemies to lovers.
after some time, in february 2024, everything changed.
you get home after training one evening, still feeling the unease that you can’t quite place. you try to shake it off as you walk through the front door, tossing your bag to the side, and head straight for the kitchen to grab a glass of water.
your mind is still spinning with all the weird little moments from today, but you can’t quite put your finger on what’s bothering you.
everyone being so nice, so... attentive. well, your european teammates have always been the sweetest– sometimes clingy– but today feels different. your intuition tells you so.
your fingers drum against the counter as you stare off at nothing, you try to brush it off as paranoia. it was probably nothing, they’re being the best teammates that they are.
the pink iphone of yours buzzes just as you take a sip of water, and you glance down to see your national teammate’s name flashing on the screen.
relief floods you; it’s been a minute since you last talked to her, and you need some normalcy right now, something that feels comfortable and familiar. you quickly swipe to answer.
“heyyyy!” you greet, trying to sound casual as you lean back against the counter.
“hey girl,” she laughs, her voice bright and cheerful.
“god, it’s been forever since we last talked. i got bored and saw your contact so i figured i’d call you. i hope i am not interrupting?”
“you aren’t. i just got home.” you smile.
“okay cool! how are things? how’s training?”
“oh, you know, same old,” you say, forcing a smile even though she can’t see you.
“just finished up for the day like i said. bayern’s... good. how’s everything with you? i know you just transferred from lyon to chelsea last month. how is everything? you’ve been at lyon since forever.”
“forever as in a few years? ha i am doing good. the girls here are sweet.” your teammate says, you can hear the comfort in her voice.
“thats great! jess mentioned that you were getting comfortable.”
“yeah, yeah. honestly, the problem is getting used to a new routine,” she groans dramatically, and you laugh, feeling yourself relax a little.
“can’t wait to catch up with you when we’re back together at the national camp. what about you? how’s georgia doing? and the others?” your national teammate continues.
you feel a little warmth spread through your chest at the mention of your bayern teammates.
“oh, they’re great. georgia’s, well, being georgia as always. sydney’s loud and chaotic. nothing’s really changed, y’know? just the usual chaos.”
“sounds about right,” she says, chuckling.
“but hey, speaking of georgia... she told me that you were getting a new tattoo soon by her? something about matching with some of the bayern crew?”
“yeah, actually, later tonight,” you reply, glancing at the clock.
“heading over to georgia’s shop in a bit. i’m not getting one today, though—sam is. but... yeah, we’ll all be there.”
“oh, nice,” she says, and you can hear her moving around on the other end, probably putting dishes away or something.
“what’s sam getting?”
“not sure,” you admit with a shrug, even though she can’t see it.
“i think it’s a symbol or something. you know sam—always something meaningful.”
“classic sam,” she says with a fond chuckle, and for a moment, everything feels light and easy. just a normal catch-up between friends.
but then her tone shifts a bit, a hesitant edge creeping in.
“hey, uh... you’ve been good, right? like, with... everything going on?”
you blink, confused by the sudden change in topic.
“yeah, i mean... yeah, everything’s fine. why?”
she hesitates, and you can hear the hesitation in her voice.
“i just... i don’t know. i thought you might be, um, worried. about... well, about the rumors and stuff.”
“rumors?” you repeat, furrowing your brow. “what rumors?”
“about lena,” she says softly, like she’s not sure how you’re going to take it.
the smile on your face drops from the sound of her name.
“you know... her possibly transferring to bayern.”
you freeze, the air catching in your throat. “what?” you say, your voice coming out sharper than you intended.
“what do you mean… transferring? lena’s at wolfsburg. she’s been there forever and i remember lea mentioning something about her signing a renewal with them.”
there’s a pause, and you hear her take a deep breath.
“yeah, i know, but... haven’t you seen the news on social media? like, there’s a bunch of talk that she might be coming to bayern. i mean, it’s all just rumors right now, but... i figured someone would’ve mentioned it to you. i thought... i thought you knew.”
you shake your head even though she can’t see you, trying to process what she’s saying, but it feels like she’s speaking another language.
“no, no, i didn’t know. why would... why would lena come to bayern? that... that doesn’t make sense.”
“i mean, she’s one of the best players in germany,” your teammate points out, her voice still soft and cautious.
“it kinda makes sense for her to move to a big club like bayern... i’m sorry– i know you hate me for saying that–but i didn’t think you’d be finding out like this. shit shit shit, i’m sorry, y/n. i honestly thought you knew.”
“no,” you say quickly, trying to keep your voice steady even as your mind is racing. “no, i... i had no idea. i mean... lena and bayern, that’s... that’s not possible. it can’t be real.”
“it’s all just talk right now,” she reassures you, but you can hear the uncertainty in her voice.
“look, maybe it’s just rumors, you know how these things go. people are always saying players are going here and there. remember when the news said that you were leaving munich to go to new york?? that never happened! but... i dunno, i’ve been seeing it all over my timeline.”
you feel your heart pounding in your chest, and there’s a dull ringing in your ears as you try to make sense of everything.
“you’re... you’re joking, right?” you force out a laugh, but it sounds shaky.
“please tell me you’re joking.”
“i wish i was,” she says, and your stomach drops. “i can send you the links if you want to see for yourself.”
“fine,” you say, feeling like you’re on autopilot now, the panic starting to build in your chest.
“send them over.”
the moment the call ends, the links start coming through—one after the other, headlines that make your eyes blur with disbelief.
“wolfsburg star rumored to be signing with bayern…”
“lena oberdorf could be on the move…”
“bayern munich set to sign germany’s young talent…”
it’s like the words swim in front of your eyes, and your breath catches in your throat.
you stare at your phone, feeling the world shift beneath your feet. it feels like everything is closing in, like the room is getting smaller and smaller, and all you can do is sit there, trying to remember how to breathe.
lena. at bayern. in the same locker room as you. wearing the same crest as you. doing the same cheers and learning the handshakes. it feels like a nightmare, but you’re wide awake.
she’d never come here. she’d never... never follow you to bayern. not after everything. you told yourself.
but then again, lena was always one step ahead, always getting to you when you least expected it.
what if it’s true? what if she really is coming here?
you shakily text your teammate back—hey, i’ll call you later,—but you know you won’t. not now. not while your head is spinning like this.
you make it to georgia’s tattoo place, just about two minutes late but munich traffic during rush hour was busy. the bell above the door chimes as you step in, and the familiar smell of ink and antiseptic fills the air.
georgia’s setting up her tattoo gun for sam, who’s chatting animatedly with ana, lea, and sydney on the side. usually, you’d be joking around with them, too, but today you’re barely holding it together.
georgia looks up, smiling as you walk in. “hey, you made it! ready to watch the magic happen while sam panics the whole time?”
“shut up!” sam protests.
you force a smile, but it feels fake, plastered on. you can’t focus on anything but the whirlwind of thoughts spinning in your head.
“yeah... yeah, sure,” you mumble, feeling like your voice is coming from someone else’s mouth.
sydney notices the look on your face and frowns.
“y/n? what’s up? you have the same face you made when we got knocked out of the champions league last month.”
you swallow hard, your voice wavering as you ask the question that’s been clawing at your mind the entire way over.
“did... did you guys know about lena? that she’s... coming to bayern?”
the room goes quiet, and you see the way georgia’s shoulders tense, the way sydney exchanges a look with ana.
no one speaks for a moment, and the silence feels like it’s crushing you.
lea is the one to break it, stepping forward and reaching out to touch your arm gently.
“y/n, we didn’t want to tell you until we knew for sure. it’s all rumors right now—lena hasn’t told me anything about that yet. nothing is confirmed, okay?”
“yeah,” sydney adds quickly, crossing her arms, her voice firm.
“look, lena’s a good player. if she’s coming to bayern, it’s not to make your life harder. she probably wants to be close to her friends, her family... you should know that this isn’t about you.”
“but it feels like it’s about me,” you admit, hating the tremor in your voice. “it’s like she’s... she’s invading my space, and i... i don’t know what to do about it. what if she comes here and makes everything... worse?”
you tell yourself you’re a professional, and lena is too. you tell yourself that maybe things will be okay. but the past still grips your chest tightly, reminding you of every moment of anger, every tackle, every taunt. and deep down, you know you’re not ready to let that go. not yet.
when lena confirms to the public that she will join bayern after this season ends, with the bayern pages itself posting pictures of lena signing the contract beside bianca-- you feel dread.
“what if she takes my spot? what if she bullies me in the locker room when you guys aren’t around?” you found yourself blurting out to pernille, magda, and tuva in the lounge room the following morning.
“what if she… i don’t know, what if she ruins everything and i’d have to move clubs?”
“süße erbse,” tuva said gently, placing a hand on your shoulder. “you really think we’d let that happen? lena’s good, but you’re y/n l/n. we love you here.”
“yeah,” pernille added with a grin, “you think lena can come in here and take away our süße erbse? not a chance.”
you wanted to believe them, but there was still a knot in your stomach. it wasn’t just about your spot on the team.
it was everything—years of being belittled by her, the way she made you feel like you were always playing catch-up. and now she was going to be…here. in your everyday life.
when july rolled around, the first day lena officially joins bayern, you’re tense before you even get to the training ground.
everyone– aka the girls from the german national team–have been buzzing about her arrival for weeks, and the news has followed you around like a shadow—reminding you every day that your former rival, the person who pushed you to your lowest, was now going to be your teammate.
it doesn't sit right, and as you step into the locker room that morning, you can’t shake the discomfort in your chest.
there she is, standing by her locker, looking...different. softer than the lena you’re used to seeing in the green and white of wolfsburg.
now, she’s wearing the same red bayern training kit as you, and it makes something twist inside your stomach. wrong. that’s what it feels like—just wrong.
you want to turn around and leave, just pretend you forgot something in the parking lot and stall for time, but she spots you before you can move.
her eyes light up, that familiar spark dancing in them—but it’s not taunting like before. it’s... welcoming. she gives you this big smile, the kind that makes her eyes crinkle at the edges, and suddenly it feels like the room is too hot, too small, like the walls are closing in on you.
“y/n, hey,” lena says, and her voice sounds...kind. friendly. nothing like the voice you remember yelling at you on the pitch, taunting you with every mistake.
she walks toward you, like she’s genuinely excited to see you, and you want to flinch away.
“i’m really glad to be here. i know we’ve had a past, but i hope we can leave all that behind and be teammates. put the rivalry aside, yeah?”
you force a smile, but it feels more like a grimace. “hi,” you manage to say, your voice cracking slightly.
you can barely meet her eyes, your gaze dropping to the floor because looking at her feels like staring straight into the past—the tackles, the taunts, the years of feeling like you were always playing catch-up.
“it’s nice to finally be on the same side, don’t you think?” she continues, still smiling, as if she’s trying to ease the tension.
“i’m looking forward to working with you. i’ve... always admired how you play.”
the words are so dissonant, so out of place coming from her, that you can’t help but scoff quietly.
admired you? this is the same woman who spent years making you feel like you were never enough, who relished in getting under your skin every chance she got. and now she was just going to act like that history never existed? like she never made you a joke, like you’re supposed to be grateful for her kindness now?
“right,” you say flatly, unable to keep the sarcasm from your voice. “well... welcome, then.”
you turn to walk away, unable to deal with the tightness in your chest, but the moment you take a step, lena calls after you, her voice softening.
“y/n, wait—I really mean it. i don’t want there to be... any bad blood between us. i want to start fresh.”
you pause, but don’t turn back to look at her. every muscle in your body feels tense, like you’re coiled to spring away, and your mind is racing with every bitter memory.
“yeah, well... some things aren’t that easy to forget,” you mutter before walking off, feeling like you’re practically running away towards the training grounds.
your heart hammers in your chest as you make your way to the pitch, trying to shake the feeling of discomfort that lingers.
you hate how your voice sounded, how nervous you were—like a little kid facing down a bully.
get it together, you're a twenty-one year old adult. you tell yourself, trying to block out the way she looked at you, like you were someone she actually cared about.
you don’t know this lena, and you’re not sure you want to.
as you head out to the pitch, you see sydney standing by the goalpost, and you practically breathe a sigh of relief.
your best friend on the team, your fiercest defender when it comes to lena, sydney notices immediately that something’s up when she sees your face.
“she talked to you, didn’t she?” sydney asks, her voice sharp. she’s always had your back when it comes to lena, never liked the way she treated you.
all of the other girls at bayern hated how lena treated you, but sydney was more vocal about it.
“what’d she say?”
“just... some bullshit about wanting to start over,” you say, shaking your head, your voice dripping with disbelief.
“like she thinks we’re just going to be best friends now or something. like all of the shit she put me through doesn’t matter.”
sydney’s expression hardens, and she glares over at lena, who’s standing off to the side of the pitch, looking a little lost and unsure as lea talks to tuva.
“what did she expect? that she’d walk in and everything would be fine and dandy?” she scoffs, rolling her eyes.
“she’s got a nerve, acting like you’re just supposed to forgive her instantly.”
“yeah, well, i’m not,” you say, your jaw tightening. “not yet. maybe not ever.”
training starts, and as the drills go on, you feel lena’s eyes on you a few times—quick glances, like she’s gauging whether to approach you again.
but every time she makes a move, sydney is there, blocking her path or shooting her a look that says, not now. eventually, lena seems to get the hint, and she keeps her distance, sticking close to lea.
after training, as you’re cooling down, you see lena approach sydney, her expression uncertain but determined.
“hey, um... is y/n okay?” you hear her ask, her voice low. “i didn’t mean to... i don’t know, make her uncomfortable.”
sydney, to her credit, doesn’t sugarcoat anything. “look, lena,” she says firmly, crossing her arms.
“you know what happened between you two. you know what you did. don’t expect her to like you immediately just because you’re being nice now. give her space. she’s not... ready for this.”
lena nods slowly, looking over at you from across the pitch, her face falling slightly. “yeah... yeah, i get it. thanks.”
you don’t know how much she means it—you don’t know if she really understands how much damage she did, how much she’s hurt you over the years. and you’re not ready to find out, either. all you know is that seeing her in the same kit, wearing your club’s crest, feels like a betrayal. and it’s going to take a lot more than nice words and pretty smiles to change that.
throughout the preseason she tried to engage with you more, but every time, you shied away. it wasn’t that you couldn’t talk to her—it was that you didn’t want to.
not after how she made you feel.
lena, for her part, noticed. she wasn’t stupid. she saw how you avoided her, how you never quite met her eyes. so one day, after a particularly awkward training session, she turned to her best friend lea for advice.
“why does y/n hate me so much?” lena asked, frowning as they sat together after practice.
lea glanced at her, “obi, are you serious?”
lena sighed,
then lea sighed. “well, it’s pretty obvious, lena. you’ve been pushing her around and treating her like shit for years.”
lena blinked, clearly taken aback. “what do you mean?”
“i mean, you’ve made her life miserable on the pitch,” lea explained patiently, even though lena pretends like the last three years didn’t exist.
“people have been making jokes about her because of you, and you…you’ve entertained it. you’ve never let up, even when it wasn’t necessary. of course she’s going to resent you. you made her feel small.”
lena was quiet for a long moment, her brow furrowing. she hadn’t thought about it that way before.
she’d just always seen it as competition, as banter. but now… now it made sense. “i didn’t mean to,” she murmured.
“yeah, well,” lea said, “that doesn’t change how she feels.”
then, as if things couldn’t get more complicated, lena tore her acl before the olympics in the summer. it was brutal, seeing her go down like that. and even though you resented her, a part of you—deep down—felt sorry for her.
you knew what it was like to be sidelined for months due to the same injury, to watch everything you’ve worked for slip away.
so, you did something you didn’t think you’d ever do: you texted her through instagram.
*hey. i’m sorry to hear about your injury. i hope you have a smooth recovery.*
you stared at your phone for a long time after hitting send, unsure if you’d regret it. lena responded quickly, thanking you, and trying to start a conversation. but you didn’t give her much, keeping your replies short, not really engaging.
you weren’t ready to let your guard down yet, even if she is on the same team with your teammates protecting you.
over the next two months, lena tried again and again to reach out, but you kept her at arm’s length.
it wasn’t until one day, after a particularly long rehab session, that she finally cornered you, her eyes soft but determined.
“can we talk?” she asked, her voice gentler than you’d ever heard it.
you sighed but nodded, deciding it was time to hear her out. the two of you found a quiet spot in the training center, and she looked at you with something almost like regret in her eyes.
“i didn’t realize…how much i hurt you,” lena began.
“i thought it was just part of the game, you know? but lea explained it to me. and i finally get it now. i’m so sorry.”
you crossed your arms, looking down at your shoes.
“you made me a joke, lena. you acted like it was nothing, but i had to hear it from everyone. people comparing us, praising you, and making me feel like…like i wasn’t good enough. and you encouraged it. you made me feel small.”
lena’s face softened, and she stepped closer.
“that was never my intention. i never meant to make you feel like that. i admired you. you’re…goodness, y/n, you’re incredible on the pitch. you’re so fast, and the way you move with the ball—it’s like art. and off the pitch, you’re…you’re kind. you’re good to people. i didn’t realize how much that meant until lea pointed it out.”
you blinked, taken aback by her words. “what?”
lena sighed, running a hand through her hair.
“i’m saying i like you. i’ve liked you for a while now. i just didn���t know how to show it, so i acted like an idiot. i get it if you hate me. i probably deserve that.”
you stared at her, completely caught off guard.
“you’re joking, right? are you serious? you can’t just say something like that after everything. how can you feel that way after everything you’ve said and done to me?”
“i’m not joking,” lena said softly, her eyes meeting yours. “i like you, y/n. and i’m sorry. i really am. i know i hurt you, but if you give me a chance, i’d like to make it up to you.”
you swallowed hard, trying to process everything. part of you wanted to stay angry, to hold onto the grudge you’d built up over the years. but another part of you—one that you didn’t want to admit existed—was intrigued.
was it possible that lena oberdorf, the girl who had made your life hell on the pitch, actually had feelings for you?
“i don’t know,” you said slowly, your voice tight. “you hurt me, lena. you pushed me around for years. you made me feel like i was less. i’m not just going to forget that because you have a crush.”
lena nodded, her expression serious. “i understand. i’m not asking you to forget. i’m just asking for a chance to prove that i’m not that person anymore.”
you hesitated, your walls still firmly in place. “if i even consider this,” you said carefully, “you need to apologize. really apologize, not just say it because you think it’s what i want to hear.”
lena met your eyes, her voice steady. “i’m sorry, y/n. i’m sorry for the way i treated you, for making you feel like you weren’t enough. you’re more than enough. you’ve always been.”
you felt something shift in your chest, a soft crack in the armor you’d built up over the years. maybe, just maybe, lena meant it.
“okay,” you said quietly, your voice barely above a whisper. “we’ll see.”
after months of unease, things start to shift. lena is at bayern now, and even though you’re not thrilled about it, you’ve accepted that she’s not going anywhere.
she’s on the sidelines for every training session, every game, with that same determined look in her eyes, even though her acl injury keeps her off the pitch.
despite the resentment that still lingers, you can’t help but feel like you’re softening toward her, little by little.
you've been bayern’s top scorer so far this season. after every game, lena comes onto the pitch to congratulate everyone. she goes around, hugging your teammates, and when she gets to you, her arms open, but you freeze.
“um– can we do a handshake?” you suggest awkwardly, offering your hand instead of leaning in for the hug. lena hesitates but nods with a small smile, shaking your hand.
“good game,” she says quietly, eyes lingering on you for a moment longer than necessary.
“thanks,” you mumble, trying not to meet her gaze for too long.
it goes on like that for a while. lena is kind, trying to talk to you, but you keep your distance. until one night in the champions league group stage against brann.
you’re in form, dominating the game. after the final whistle, you feel unstoppable, and for once, when lena comes up to you, the usual wall you’ve put up doesn’t feel as necessary.
“that was an incredible performance,” lena says, her voice softer than you expected. “that goal of yours was fucking amazing!.”
something in her tone feels different, more genuine. you swallow, feeling a strange warmth in your chest.
“thank youu!” you say, and before you realize it, you’re leaning into her for a hug. it’s quick, but enough to catch lena off guard. when you pull back, you notice her slight smile, surprised but pleased.
lea sees it, of course. she catches your eye from across the pitch and raises an eyebrow, smirking as if to say, finally. you roll your eyes at her but can’t help the small smile tugging at your lips.
the next game, however, things take a turn. you go down with a minor ankle injury—nothing serious, but enough to keep you out for a week. you’re frustrated, but during that time off, lena reaches out again.
"hey, do you wanna grab lunch?" she asks one afternoon after recovery workouts, catching you as you’re leaving the facility.
you hesitate, unsure.
“maybe... georgia can come too?” you suggest, hoping for a buffer.
lena raises an eyebrow, but she nods.
“sure, if that makes you more comfortable.”
later, georgia tells you, “sorry, luv, i can’t make it. i have some appointments at the tattoo shop today. you’ll be fine without me though.”
you groan, realizing you’re stuck going alone.
the lunch ends up going better than expected, despite your initial reluctance.
lena is... different. she talks about her recovery, how tough it’s been not being able to play, and how strange it’s been being around you in this new context.
“i just want to say i’m sorry again,” lena says halfway through the meal, catching you off guard. she’s picking at her food, avoiding your gaze. “i know i’ve apologized before, but... i was really awful to you for a long time.”
you blink, surprised at the sincerity in her voice. “yeah, you were,” you admit quietly, not really looking at her either. “but... i guess it’s not as bad now. you’re trying, at least.”
lena smiles at that, small but genuine. “i am. i mean it, y/n. i really... i really do like you.”
you stare at her, the words hanging in the air. “you’re serious about that? you’re not joking? you actually... like me?”
lena’s eyes flick up to meet yours, and she nods. “i do. i know i haven’t given you many reasons to believe me, but... it’s not a joke. not anymore.”
you don’t say anything for a moment, processing her words. later, you find yourself going to lea about it.
“is she serious?” you ask her, sitting on the edge of your bed one night after training. “like, does lena really have a crush on me or is she just... messing with me again?”
lea tilts her head, looking at you carefully. “she’s serious, y/n. i’ve known lena for years, and she’s not the same person you faced on the pitch. she’s not as bad as you think.”
“really?” you furrow your brow. “because all i’ve seen is her making my life hell.”
lea sighs, shaking her head. “yes, she’s my bestfriend y/n. you only saw her bad side because you were rivals. but back when we were at essen, or even with the national team, she’s... she’s kind. she was always the first one to help out, the one who looked out for the younger players. she just got competitive with you.”
“you’re saying she’s always been kind? because i’ve literally never seen it.”
lea nods, crossing her arms. “i’ve seen it. she’s not just this tough girl who wants to win everything. she’s actually really thoughtful. she’d always bring coffee to the team early in the morning. she once helped a teammate get to the airport when she missed her train... little things like that.”
you’re quiet for a moment, trying to imagine this version of lena. “huh. i never knew that.”
“you weren’t supposed to,” lea shrugs. “you guys were always butting heads, but that doesn’t mean she didn’t care. i think... i think she just didn’t know how to show it. especially around you.”
you chew on that for a while.
in november– it hits you suddenly one evening after training before the uwcl match against arsenal.
as you’re sitting on the edge of your bed, wearing comfy pajamas, your heart is pounding for no reason that you can explain.
it’s like a creeping realization that crawls up your spine and won’t let go: you’re developing feelings for lena.
you bury your face in your hands, groaning softly.
“god, i’m so stupid,” you mutter to yourself. you can't believe it—lena, the girl who made you feel like absolute shit for years, the one who seemed to thrive on making you look bad on the pitch, the one who’d taunted and tackled you like you were nothing.
how could you possibly like her? how could you feel anything for someone who made you feel so stupid and worthless?
but now, things are different. ever since lena joined bayern, she’s been... well, kind. showing you this softer, gentler side that you never saw before. helping you during training, throwing out compliments here and there, catching you off guard with that stupid smile that makes you blush. and the more you see of this side of her, the more it eats away at you.
lena is genuinely sweet. she’s... attractive. and that scares you.
you need to talk to someone—someone who understands, someone who won’t judge you. so, you go to madga and pernille, the two adult players you trust most on the team.
they're like your mentors, the big sisters you never had, and when you knock on their door late that night, you’re practically shaking with nerves.
“y/n?” madga’s voice is gentle as she opens the door, concern immediately clouding her features.
“what’s wrong?”
“can... can i come in?” you ask, your voice wavering.
“of course,” pernille says, stepping aside to let you into their shared apartment. the space is cozy, a few blankets draped over the sofa, the faint smell of tea lingering in the air.
you sit down heavily on the couch, madga and pernille sitting on either side of you, giving you their full attention. “it’s about... lena,” you begin, hesitating, feeling your hands tremble in your lap.
madga and pernille exchange a look—one that you can’t read, but they don’t interrupt. they just nod, encouraging you to continue.
“i—i think i might... like her,” you finally confess, your voice cracking on the last words. “and i can’t believe it, because for so long i hated her. she made my life miserable on the pitch, and now she’s being all... nice, and i’m... i’m starting to see how... god, how attractive she is, and it’s terrifying.”
pernille reaches out, placing a hand on your shoulder, giving it a reassuring squeeze. “it’s okay, y/n. it’s okay to feel conflicted.”
“i’m just... i’m so angry at myself,” you admit, tears threatening to spill over. “she used to be so awful to me, you know? every time we played each other, she’d do whatever she could to make me feel like i was nothing, just... trash-talking, tackling me, all of it. and now... now i’m supposed to believe she’s this sweet, thoughtful person, like she’s always been? and the worst part is... i do believe it. and it’s like i’m losing control of how i feel.”
madga lets out a small sigh, nodding as she processes your words. “people are complicated, y/n. we all have different sides to us. it sounds like... maybe lena was just showing you one side back then—the competitor, the rival, someone who was tasked to throw you off of the game. but maybe that’s not all she is. you’re getting to see the real lena now.”
you shake your head, staring down at your hands. “but why now? why show me this side now? why couldn’t she have done it before? when i—when i actually hated her?”
“because it’s hard to show your softer side when you’re up against someone who you see as your biggest challenge,” pernille says softly.
“maybe she didn’t know how to show you who she really was. but that doesn’t mean it’s not real now.”
“i just don’t know what to do,” you whisper, feeling so lost.
“i don’t know how to feel about her. some days i want to push her away, pretend like she’s still that girl who used to treat me like crap. and then other days... i can’t stop thinking about her. about the way she smiles, how she looks at me. i stare at her arms too sometimes– gosh why am i saying that UGHH i don’t know if i can trust it. trust... her.”
madga wraps her arm around you, pulling you close in a gentle side hug. “it’s okay to be scared. it’s okay to feel all of this. but you don’t have to figure it out all at once. let it happen, y/n. let yourself feel what you feel.”
“but what if she hurts me again?” you say, your voice light.
“what if this is all just... a game to her? what if i’m just going to be a joke again?”
“noo way. if so, we will stop that,” pernille says, smiling softly. “whatever happens, we’ve got your back. but you have to let yourself feel it, even if it’s scary. if you’re really seeing a different side to lena, maybe that’s worth seeing. or... maybe not. but you won’t know unless you let yourself try.”
you nod slowly, letting their words wash over you. maybe they’re right—maybe you’re overthinking it. but the fear is still there, lingering, because falling for someone like lena means trusting her, and you’re not sure you’re ready for that.
but as you sit there, sandwiched between madga and pernille, you take a deep breath and let yourself relax. maybe, just maybe, it’ll be okay. maybe this could be something real. and if it’s not... at least you know you won’t be alone.
by now it’s december, and it’s nearing christmas. the bayern locker room is filled with excitement. everyone’s talking about their plans for the holidays—family gatherings, trips abroad, dinners with loved ones.
you sit in the corner, pulling off your ivory colored cleats slowly, hoping no one will ask you. you’ve always been good at hiding it, but this time it feels harder.
there’s no family waiting for you, no friends flying in from home. just you.
sam kerr is the first to bring it up, naturally. she’s sitting across from you, leaning back with her phone in hand, already talking about her plans.
“so, y/n,” she starts, her tone casual, but there’s a glint of curiosity in her eyes.
“what are you doing for christmas? heading home, or what?”
you freeze for a second, then plaster on your usual smile. “uh, yeah. i’ve got a friend visiting,” you lie, trying to keep your voice light, like it’s no big deal.
the entire locker room listens.
"oh?" georgia raises an eyebrow. “which friend? anyone we know?”
you laugh awkwardly, shaking your head. "nah, just an old friend from back home. you wouldn’t know her."
"that’s nice," ana chimes in from the other side of the room, clearly not sensing the tension behind your smile.
“i’m jealous. all my friends are still stuck at their parents’ houses in colombia. it's family overload." ana continues.
you nod along, trying to seem as normal as possible. “yeah, well, it’ll be nice to catch up.”
but then, tuva joins in, her usual sharp instincts picking up something. she looks at you, her eyes narrowing slightly. "you’ve never mentioned this friend before. how come?"
you feel your stomach tighten. "we... we don’t talk much. they’re in university. we are just, you know, catching up for the holidays."
tuva tilts her head, still studying you, but thankfully, she doesn’t push further. instead, the conversation shifts as the others talk about their own plans again. but you can feel the tightness in your chest, the weight of the lie sitting uncomfortably on your shoulders.
you can’t help but wonder if any of them can tell.
as you finish changing and start heading out, georgia catches up to you.
“hey, y/n,” she says softly, her voice just a bit quieter, as if sensing something’s off. “you good? you seemed... i don’t know, distracted earlier.”
you force a smile again. “yeah, just tired. it’s been a long week.”
georgia doesn’t look convinced, but she lets it go, offering you a soft smile. “well, if you need anything over christmas, let me know, alright? we can always meet up if your plans fall through.”
“thank you,” you mumble, appreciating her kindness but knowing you’ll never take her up on that offer.
you’ve gotten used to spending the holidays alone, and this year will be no different.
christmas day arrives, and true to your word, you’re alone.
you walk to your favorite café, the one where the baristas know your order without you even having to ask.
the streets are quiet, the festive buzz from days prior now fading into a peaceful stillness. you’ve got your true crime book tucked under your arm, planning to spend the afternoon reading, just like every year.
as you step inside the café, you smile at the baristas, leaving a generous tip in their jar.
"merry christmas," you say, offering them a small nod before settling into your usual spot by the window.
outside of the team, outside of football, you consider yourself to be a loner. due to childhood trauma involving neglect, you don’t talk to your family. in fact, football was your escape from them.
you never made an effort to have friends outside of the clubs you played for. the hobbies you have never involved meeting other people. you’re aware that you shouldn’t have your life surrounded by football, but it was the thing that saved you.
even “she” couldn’t break you from playing football for those three years.
you’re halfway through the first chapter of your book when the door swings open. at first, you don’t pay much attention, too focused on the pages in front of you. but then you hear familiar footsteps, and out of habit, you glance up. your heart drops when you see who it is.
lena.
you immediately duck your head, trying to hide behind your book, but it’s too late. lena stops mid-step, her eyes widening in surprise as she spots you.
she pauses for a moment, clearly taken aback, before heading straight toward your table.
“y/n?” she asks, her voice carrying a mix of confusion and curiosity.
“what are you doing here?”
you swallow hard, forcing yourself to look up. “uh... just grabbing a coffee,” you reply, your voice stiff.
lena’s eyes flicker with suspicion as she pulls out the chair across from you and sits down backwards on the chair, her arms resting on top of the wood..
“where’s your friend? the one who was supposed to visit?”
your pulse quickens, and for a split second, you consider keeping up the lie.
but something about the way she’s looking at you, her brow furrowed with genuine concern, makes you crumble.
“they... they couldn’t make it,” you admit, your voice quieter now. “something came up.”
lena studies you for a moment, her gaze softening. “you’re lying,” she says gently, but there’s no malice in her voice.
“there was never a friend. you’re spending christmas alone, aren’t you?”
you sigh, dropping your gaze to the table. “yeah,” you finally admit, feeling the weight of the truth settle around you.
“i’ve always spent it alone. it’s... just how it is.”
lena’s expression softens even more, and she leans forward slightly, her voice quiet but firm.
“you don’t have to spend it alone, y/n. come with me. i’m not doing anything either, my parents are visiting my brother.”
you blink, surprised by the offer. “lena, you don’t have to—”
“i’m not letting you spend christmas in a cold café by yourself,” she interrupts, her tone leaving no room for argument.
“come on. i’ve got rookie at home, we’ll cook something, and i can put on some disney christmas movies. it’ll be fun.”
you hesitate, glancing around the empty café before looking back at her. “i don’t know, lena...”
“please,” she insists, her eyes searching yours. “it’s christmas. no one should be alone.”
after a long pause, you finally nod. “okay. but only because you said disney movies.”
lena grins, standing up and grabbing her coat. “deal.”
“also, what’s a rookie? you said you’ve got a rookie at home.” you question as lena holds the door open for you.
“you’ll see.” lena smirks.
in her apartment, the atmosphere is warm and cozy. rookie, her dog, greets you excitedly at the door, his tail wagging as he sniffs at your legs.
“awe who’s this?” you smile, going on your knees as you scratch the dog’s ears.
“this is rookie!” lena says, admiring you and rookie interacting.
“this is the rookie!!!” you squeak.
“he likes you,” lena says, smiling as she watches rookie lay in front of me.
“i’m a dog person, and a cat person too but rookie is so cute!!” you bend down to give rookie a scratch behind the ears.
as the afternoon goes on, you and lena fall into an easy rhythm.
you help her prepare dinner, chopping vegetables while she stirs the sauce on the stove.
it’s quiet, but not awkward—just peaceful. every now and then, she glances at you, and you catch her staring, but you pretend not to notice.
later, you’re both curled up on the couch, a disney movie playing in the background while rookie lies at your feet. you’re comfortable, your shoulder brushing against hers, and for the first time in a while, you feel... content.
“thanks for today,” you mumble, your head resting on the back of the couch as you glance over at her.
lena looks at you, her expression soft. “i’m just glad you didn’t have to be alone,” she says quietly.
“you don’t deserve that.”
you swallow, feeling a lump form in your throat. “i’ve been alone for so long, i guess i just got used to it.”
the taller german woman starts to feel an ache in her stomach. everyday she wishes that she could go back and treat you normally on the pitch instead of being a bully. if she knew that you went through this outside of football, she would’ve left you alone.
lena’s gaze lingers on you as she thinks, something unspoken passing between you.
“you don’t have to be,” she murmurs, her voice barely above a whisper.
and in that moment, you realize it. the feelings you’ve been trying to push away for months, the ones you tried to convince yourself weren’t real—they’re there.
but you still have to ask her something, to find closure to the past.
still curled up on her couch with a blanket over your legs, rookie still sprawled out happily at your feet. you never thought you’d be spending christmas with the one person who used to make you burn with anger every time you saw her.
lena is relaxed, and you’re getting there, too, bit by bit. you’re comfortable now—actually comfortable—and you can feel her warmth beside you, feel the weight of how things have changed between you two. the silence is easy, broken only by the soft sound of the movie playing and rookie’s gentle snores.
“can i ask you something?” you say softly, turning to look at her. your voice is careful, not wanting to ruin the moment but needing to know.
lena glances at you, her eyes curious, a small smile playing on her lips. “of course.”
you take a breath, trying to find the right words.
“why... why did you hate me so much before? back when we were... rivals, i guess. you were so... aggressive, and it always felt like you had something against me. but now you’re... different. so what changed?”
lena looks away, biting her lip like she’s trying to decide how much to say. the tension of the moment makes your chest tighten, but you wait, giving her time.
after a long pause, she finally speaks.
“i never hated you like i said,” she admits quietly, her eyes focused on the christmas lights twinkling across the room.
“i know it felt like that, but... it wasn’t hate. it was... god, it was the opposite, really. i talked to lea and jill a lot back then, when i was at wolfsburg, and... i didn’t know how to deal with how i felt about you.”
you tilt your head, furrowing your brow in confusion. “what do you mean?”
lena sighs, running a hand through her hair. “i... asked lea and jill for help. i didn’t know how to get your attention. it sounds stupid now, but... the only way i knew how was... being that way on the pitch. the aggression, the pushing—it was the only way i felt like i could have a piece of you.”
you blink, trying to process her words, the way they seem to pull back the curtain on everything you thought you knew.
“so, what... you acted like that just to get me to pay attention to you?”
“yeah,” lena says, her voice softening as she looks back at you, meeting your eyes.
“i was so focused on... being seen by you, even if it was just you being mad at me. it was selfish, and i’m sorry for all of it. it’s not fair that i treated you like that. i feel terrible about it actually”
you’re silent for a moment, and then you let out a soft laugh, shaking your head. “you know... we could’ve been friends from the start. we had so many mutual friends, lena. it’s not like you couldn’t have just... talked to me.”
lena’s smile turns sad, almost regretful. “but i never wanted to be just friends with you,” she says quietly, the words hanging in the air between you.
“i always wanted more. that’s why... i couldn’t just be nice and friendly like everyone else. it didn’t feel like enough.”
you nod slowly, her words settling into you like the last piece of a puzzle finally clicking into place.
it’s like understanding something you’ve been grappling with for so long. “i get that,” you whisper. “it was... a lot, though. for a long time, i didn’t know what to make of it. of you.”
“i know,” lena says, and she reaches out, her fingers brushing against your cheek as she tucks a strand of hair behind your ear. “but... i’m not that person anymore. i’ve changed. and i want to be better for you.”
you take a deep breath, feeling the weight of the past start to lift from your shoulders, piece by piece. you realize, in this quiet, cozy moment, that you’re ready to let it go.
“i finally feel like... like i’ve gotten over the past,” you say softly, your voice steady as you look into her eyes. “and... i forgive you, lena.”
the words are like a release, freeing both of you from everything that came before. lena’s eyes soften, and without thinking, you lean in, pressing your lips to hers in a gentle, tentative kiss.
it’s soft and sweet, like the world has slowed down around you. she holds your waist and lets you lay down on hers after you pull away. now you’re cuddling as rookie adjusted himself to sit on the other side of lena.
“i think...” you whisper, smiling as you finally let yourself say it out loud. “i think i’m catching feelings for you, too.”
lena’s eyes light up, and she pulls you closer, her lips finding yours again, this time deeper, more certain.
"merry christmas," lena whispers, pressing a gentle kiss to your temple after you pulled away again.
"merry christmas," you reply, snuggling into her warmth, knowing that things have totally changed for the better.
part three
#lena oberdorf#lena oberdorf x reader#woso fanfics#woso community#woso x reader#gerwnt#bayern frauen#pernille harder#magdalena eriksson#lea schüller#sydney lohmann#georgia stanway
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A 9-year-old Julian Bashir who has had nightmares about evil doctors in an alien hospital for as long as he can remember. He doesn't tell his parents though because "he's a big boy now" and nightmares are for little kids, so he knows he should deal with them alone. And even if he'd like a hug sometimes, his mum only gives him hugs for doing well, not for doing badly, so he figures there's no point bothering her
A 15-year-old Julian Bashir who realises that the nightmares he used to have were based on the apparently very real alien hospital his parents had taken him to as a kid, and spends hours trying to figure out what were real memories and what his mind had made up over the years as he slept. The nightmares come back with an intensity, but they're nothing compared with how he's feeling when he's awake, and pretty soon they become a normal background noise of his life.
A 19-year-old Julian Bashir who's finally been moved into a solitary room after his third roommate in as many weeks complained about the almost-nightly screams. His advisor asks if he wants to speak to anyone: he claims they're just night terrors and he doesn't actually remember them. Besides, even if he could talk about what was in them, he probably wouldn't, because he's fine - he's used to them by now.
A 24-year-old Julian Bashir who gets woken from his nightmares by warm hands and gentle kisses, and learns what is like to be soothed back to sleep by the soft voice of Palis Delon
A 32-year-old Julian Bashir who has a different nightmare every night. The last year's been difficult. But then, it's been difficult for everyone, and he knows he's far from the only one to be suffering from nightmares at the moment.
A 34-year-old Julian Bashir who can't stop dreaming about the torture he went through four weeks ago, who's missing Ezri and who Miles is increasingly concerned about. When the O'Briens offer him their spare room for a while, he warns them multiple times about his nightmares, and is pathetically grateful when that doesn't change their minds. "We have nightmares too, Julian," says Keiko. "We can cope with yours."
A 34-year-old Julian Bashir who is confused when, three days later, Miles remarks, "You are having a bad run of those nightmares, aren't you?"
"They've been better than usual, actually," he replies awkwardly. "It's been really nice being able to go back to sleep afterwards, for once -- you and Keiko have been so generous in coming and checking on me."
"Course we're gonna come and check on you," says Miles gruffly. "You woke up terrified. We're not letting you do that alone."
"I'd be fine, Miles," Julian reassures. "I'm hardly going to expect one of you to come in every night."
Miles pauses. "...How long are you expecting to have them 'every night' for?" he asks, with some concern. "I mean, after a thing like this, how long does it usually take them to settle down?"
Julian stares at Miles. "I... have nightmares, Miles," he replies, frowning. "Just like you. Nightmares happen every night."
"No, they don't," says Miles, equally confused. "Don't get me wrong, they can do: after something big then sure, they're like that for a few weeks - a couple of months, even. But eventually they fall down to once, twice a week..."
Julian is looking at Miles incredulously. "That might be how it works for you," he says. "I guess my brain's different to yours. Mine don't stop, they just... mix. Change. Get confused with one another, eventually. I've had more dreams about being genetically modified by Sloan in the Dominion camp than I care to remember, you know?"
Miles' concern has turned into abject dismay. "You're saying you've had nightmares every single night since the Dominion took you?" he exclaims.
"Well, maybe not every single night!" retorts Julian, a little unsure what Miles is getting so het up about. "I do have some days when I don't... But yeah, pretty much. I've had nightmares most nights since I was fifteen, it's just how my brain processes stuff."
"Fifteen?"
...
A 34-year-old Julian who finds out that having nightmares every night for two decades is, apparently, "not normal" and something he should be seeking help for.
If Ezri comes back alive, he supposes he might take it up with her.
#Julian Bashir#Fic ideas#Although this has kind of become something of a ficlet in and of itself#I've got MORE in the brain#But now's not the time to start new fic#So... I wrote this instead#Which was supposed to be short 😅#Only took me an hour to write oops#Andi writes#My trek musings#wsb
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The Bottle - Carlos Sainz x Reader
Plot: You'd always believed in soulmates, in your culture an old tradition was that a person would send out a letter in a glass bottle for their soulmate with clue's requesting the person who found it comes to find them.
Carlos walked along the long stretch of sand with his cousin. It was summer and they were vacationing in Mallorca in the family property.
They'd gone for a morning jog keeping up with his fitness plan for over the summer break ready for the second stint of his F1 season.
"What's that?" Carlos mumbles looking down at the glass bottle buried half in and half out of the season. He reaches down to pick it up but his cousin smacks his hand away.
"It could be broken and hurt you!" he exclaims looking at Carlos in shock as to why he would be so silly.
"It's not broken look, there's a note inside I'm intrigued!" he says pulling it out the sand and popping the cork off the top that was keeping the paper dry.
He pulls the paper out looking and reading the note on it.
Dear Soulmate, If you picked this up, it's because something called you too. In my culture when we do this and someone picks it up it means their our soulmate. I now have to give you clues and if you're intrigued enough you'll come find me. My name is Y/N and I'm 21 years old. Clue 1: I'm from country known for it's monarchy! Clue 2: I have a degree in fashion design from a top university Clue 3: 2021 Clue 4. I work under Mr McQueen Clue 5. 36 Clue 6. Enbankment Yours Sincerely, Your Soulmate.
"No way!" Carlos laughs re-reading it! He stuffs it in his pocket, knowing to take it home and look more into it.
"What was it!" his cousin asks looking over.
"Nothing!" he exclaims not wanting his cousin to think he was crazy, but Carlos had a strong belief in fate. This meant that of course he would come and find you.
You had actually sent that bottle out years ago on your 21st birthday in Australia, you were now 24 and thriving in your career as a fashion designer in Alexander McQueen.
You'd forgotten about the bottle since you'd done it, for a few months after you hoped someone would have found it but it slowly become one of those things you just forgot about.
For Carlos, he returned home with the note in his jacket pocket and he set it down on his desk.
He couldn't help but giggle re-reading over the clues and note. As a famous F1 driver he found the working under McQueen funny, but that didn't lead him too much.
But his best chance would be to join Lando for the week before the British Grand Prix, as he knew that you'd be in the UK. According to clue 1.
"Lando, please take this seriously this is a real person I want to find her!" he exclaims shoving the photocopied version of the original letter as he didn't want to destroy it.
"Okay, right so you've determined she's a uni student from the UK. There's like over 150 universities here so it's going to be impossible especially if we don't know what year she graduated" Lando sighs looking down the clues.
"Well, what about Clue 3, 2021, you recon that's when she graduated?" he asks and Lando puts a finger on his chin, thinking for a moment.
"It could be, but that would mean she also would have sent it out in 2021, how did this survive for four years at sea!" Lando exclaims looking over at Carlos who has his head tilted in shock.
"What do you mean?" he asks.
"Well, the youngest you can graduate is 21 in the UK, so if she did it in 2021, at age 21 she would now be 24?" Lando admits.
"And it says top UK, university that's either Oxford or Cambridge. And only Cambridge have a specific one called Fashion Design" Lando explains after some research making some deductions.
"Take me there!" Carlos says suddenly.
"To Cambridge... no mate! Look there's other clues. She's got a fashion degree, is in the UK and works under Mr McQueen, she probably is a designer in London HQ of Alexander McQueen which would explain Embankment!" Lando deducts and Carlos just has a shocked look on his face the whole time.
"What is Enbankment?" he asks.
"It's an underground station, I bet that's the station she uses to get home, to Apartment 36 perhaps?" Lando asks.
"Fuck onlyfans, if F1 fails become a god damn detective!" Carlos says pulling him into big hug before letting go and pulling shoes and a coat.
"Where are you going?" Lando shouts after him.
"The McQueen HQ building!" Carlos shouts back.
"Do you even know where it is?" he asks making Carlos pause.
"No, but I'll find it!" he shouts back before running out the door.
He tries to find his way around the underground system of London before googling the HQ and where it was. He eventually got there into the reception checking to see it was 4pm, not the end of office work day so maybe he would catch you.
"Hi there, really sorry. Looking for a Y/N?" he asks and the older lady looks over at him with a frown.
"Business?" she says in a posh British accent.
"Erm..." he couldn't think of anything to say.
"She's a friend of mine from Uni, from Cambridge" he smiles and she looks over him.
"Well, you just missed her, she left for the day about 10 minutes ago!" she offers and he sighs.
"Enbankment!" he says before running out the building. He runs down to the underground and he starts to look around all the people on the platform.
You were stood there, leaning against the underground wall and reading your book.
Carlos eyes were darting around the platform, he could make deductive reasoning. He was looking for a 24 year old fashionista and when his eyes met yours, it was like something in him just knew that it was you.
You looked at him with your head cocked to the side in confusion as to why this man was looking like that as you. However, as the tube pulled into the station your gaze wavered as you made your way on.
Carlos was in awe that he wasn't moving until someone ran past him to try catch the door. He realized you were gone and must be on the train, so he did the same getting on as the doors were closing into separate compartment.
He waited and at every stop he'd poke his head out to see if you got off. At one particularly busy stop, some people get off and a bunch of people push on before he can poke his head out, he gravitates back towards the front and sees your hair in the little bow walk away and towards the exit.
He pushes through and jumps out the doors just as they are about to close. He runs up the only stairs that are there seeing you at the top swiping a rail card onto the scanner and being let out of the gates.
He runs foreward swiping his own card.
"Hello, sir... can we take a minute of your time to talk about Climate Change!" a protester stops him, with a smile on his face where he looks behind her to see you stepping out into the sun lit street.
"I'm really sorry! No! I'm late to meet someone!" he explains before pushing past and running through the gate swiping the Oyster Card he owned from when he worked with McLaren.
He runs out onto the street where you did letting his eyes adjust to the light as he looks around for you. His eyes catch the long dress you were wearing, it was colourful and red, a colour he considered his since working for Ferrari.
He saw you walking into a building block and started to run towards the traffic lights and presses the button straight away. He waits for the green man before running across apologising to anybody he bumped into. He finds the entrance seeing security there and panics.
God they'd think he was crazy if he asked them to let him in. But then again. He was Carlos Sainz!
"Hey, I was hoping i could look round the building. I'm thinking of letting a place!" he smiles his puppy smile at the two guards on the gate who turn to him with stoic expressions before noticing who it is.
"Yeah sure! That's fine! Can we get a picture with you? Me and my son are huge fans!" he exclaims making Carlos nod. After he walks into the building looking around for a map of where rooms were.
36 - thats what he was looking for.
17th floor, he got into the lift and pressed the number shooting up. He fixed his hair in the lift getting nervous to meet you, this complete stranger.
Why was he even doing this?
He exists the elevator and walks down the corridor to your apartment and stands outside. He waits for what feels like forever before he knocks on the door.
He waits and then there you are in front of him.
"Hi" he breathes out looking over your gorgeous features.
"Can I help you?" you ask looking over him. You could sort of remember his face, but from where you didn't know right now.
"Erm, I!" he starts.
"Wait your the guy i saw in the tube, did you ... follow me here?" you ask stepping out the apartment shutting the door behind you so he couldn't get in if he was a crazy person.
"Yes. But, your Y/N, you should be 24 right now. You went to Cambridge and studied Fashion design and live in a country with a famous monarchy. You work for a Mr McQueen which actually means Alexander McQueen where you use the tube to get to work each day and live at apartment 36" Carlos breathes out all in one breath, you cock your head to the side in curiosity wondering why they were such specific facts until he pulls out a sheet of paper that you never thought you'd see again.
"No!" you laugh putting a hand over your mouth.
"Where did you find this!" you ask looking up at the man in awe.
"A beach in Mallorca" he offers scratching the back of his neck trying to work out what you were thinking right now.
"I chucked this off a boat in Australia on my 21st birthday" you gasp in shock at how far it had come.
"My family has a holiday home in Mallorca and it was on the beach where I run everyday!" he smiles nodding.
"And you actually came to find me?" you laugh in shock thinking it was a silly thing your mum would always tell you was how your family did things. Its how she found your dad, how you nan found your grandad and how your aunt found your uncle.
"Well, I did find it. I was curious!" he grins, looking at you and you look around the corridor before you bite your lip.
"Did you maybe want to talk about all this craziness over dinner?" you ask looking up at him.
"I'd love that!" he smiles, holding a hand out for you.
"I cant believe you found me!" you smile, placing a kiss on his cheek making them turn a little pink.
"Mmmm I did find you! All from the Bottle."
Taglist:
@littlesatanicassholebitch @hockey-racing-fubol @laura-naruto-fan1998 @22yuki @simxican @sinofwriting @lewisroscoelove @cmleitora @stupidandunnecessary @clayra-g @daemyratwst @honey-belden @moonypixel @lauralarsen @vader-is-hot @ironcowboycopnickel @itsjustkhaos @the-untamed-soul @beebo86 @happylittlereader @ziejustme @lou-larcher5 @thewulf @purplephantomwolf @chasing-liberosis @chillyleclerc @chanthereader @annoyingmoonballoon @summissss @evieepepi08 @havaneseoger08 @celesteblack08 @gulphulp @fandom1ruined2me @celebstories @starfusionsworld @jspitwall @sierruhh @georgeparisole @dakotatankbig @youcannotcancelquidditch @zzonsbeek @tallbrownhairsarcastic @mellowarcadefun @ourteenagetragedy @otako5811 @countingstacksandpanicattacks @peachiicherries @formulas-bitch @cherry-piee @hopexcroc @mirrorball-6 @spilled-coffee-cup @mehrmonga @bigsimperika @blueberry64857959 @eiraethh @lilypadlover @curseofhecate @alliwantisadonut @the-fem1n1ne-urge @21stcenturytaegi @dark-night-sky-99 @spideybv28 @i-wish-this-was-me @tallrock35 @butterfly-lover @barnestatic @landossainz @darleneslane @barcelonaloverf1life @r0nnsblog @ilove-tswizzle @kapsylia @laneyspaulding19 @lazybot @malynn @cassielikereading @viennakarma @teamnovalak @landosgirlxoxo @marie0v @jlb20416 @yourbane @teamnovalak @nikfigueiredo @fionaschicken @0picels0 @seomako @urdad-hot @formula1mount @tinydeskwriter @butterfly-lover @ironmaiden1313
#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#formula 1 x you#formula 1#formula one#formula one fanfiction#carlos sainz x y/n#carlos sainz x reader#carlos sainz fluff#carlos sainz imagine#carlos sainz fanfic#cs55 x reader#cs55 imagine#carlos sainz#carlos sainz jr#carlos sainz 55
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What Now? | Eddie Munson
pairing: Eddie Munson X Fem Reader
summary: You just got broken up with and you can only think of one place to go.
warnings: none, just some fluffy Eddie moments :)
word count: 1k
a/n: Shit it's been a while. Anyways back to it!
*******NOT MY GIF, CREDIT TO OWNERS*******
Everything was going okay recently, not many nightmares and the ones I did have weren’t too bad. Until…
“What?” The confusion is evident on my face and in my voice.
“I just don’t think we’ll work out. I’m sorry,” Jamie’s head is down and their eyes are looking everywhere but at me.
“What did I do?”
“Nothing! Nothing at all, it’s me.”
I scoff, “Pfft. Okay sure,” I roll my eyes at their words, “Like every other time people say that line.”
“I’m being serious, love. I love you, I really do but there’s shit that I need to figure out-”
“Then we figure it out together! That’s what it means to be in a committed relationship!”
“I just- I feel like having a partner right now is not helping,” Their voice is distant and soft now.
“I get it. I’m too much, too clingy, too needy, too…everything,” The words sting my throat and tongue as they leave but it’s the truth, it’s what they all mean when they break it off with me.
“Not at all! You’re perfect, in every way, shape, and form. Seriously, it's me. I’m going through shit that I feel like would break us if I kept lying about it to you.”
“So this has been going on for a while?” I see their face change for a second then go back to sadness.
“Yeah, it has. But I thought it was nothing-”
“How long?”
“What?” Now it’s their turn to be confused.
“How long have you known and been going through this?” My face is steel and I show no emotion.
“Since Lolla.”
Lollapalooza was in August, it’s November. They’ve known this and not said anything for 3 months! Lying to me about everything for so long and I had no idea. I don’t even know how to feel right now. I begin to grab my bag and stuff my shit in it before getting up off their bed.
"Y/N," They reach for my hand to stop me from leaving.
I pull away before they can touch me, "Don't. I- I need space," I leave their room and head for the front door, looking back at the fuzzy orange cat lying on the back of the chair as he always does for the last time.
"Bye Cheerio," I twist the knob and walk out of the apartment I had felt so welcome in before.
I can hear the thunder once in the elevator, realizing that I can't return home because I promised Robin the apartment, assuming I'd be with Jamie all night. I try to think of who else I could stay with tonight.
Chrissy maybe? No, she’s at Jason’s place for the weekend. Oh, Nancy should be free right? I reach for my phone to text Nancy but see a Google Calendar notification on the screen.
Nancy Double Date with Johnathan and Roomie! Damn, I guess she’s out too. Maybe Robin would understand me coming home tonight, if I told them what happened?
As I think about what to do and where to go, rain starts to pour down, soaking through the loose shirt I had put on.
Why does this keep happening to me? How do I always end up in the rain with no place to go? I think back to last summer when Kris, Sophia, and I got into it and my brother’s friend had to come rescue me from myself and the rain. I laugh at the thought that this is just going to be my normal from now on.
As I walk, my feet autonomously begin to head to the only other person whom I trust and who might be able to help. I don’t even realize where I’m going until I’m standing in front of the building, not under the protection of the awning even though it’s only 3 feet in front of me.
I take a deep breath before stepping forward and deciding this really is the only option I have left. I’m thankful for the covering once I’m actually under it. I dial apartment 203 and wait for the voice of my best friend to spread through the old speaker.
"Hello?" His voice is low and gravelly; he must have just woken up.
"Eddie, It’s Y/N. Can I come up? I-" I sniffle and before I can continue I hear the lock moving and the door unlock so I can enter. I didn’t even realize I had been crying until then.
I quickly open the door and make my way through the small maze to get to his place on the second floor. I can feel my wet socks and the weight of my bag has risen tremendously since I left Jamie’s. I'm gonna need to check and make sure my computer is okay once I get inside his place.
Soon I reach his door and he's standing there against the frame, in a tshirt and sweats, his signature look. The expression on his face is one of concern and fear. Something I’m all too familiar with.
"Hey," My voice is weak and not at all how he normally hears it. I’ve never cried in front of him and we’ve been friends for over a year now, strange.
"Shit, Y/N you're soaked! Get the fuck in here," He moves out the way and closes the door behind me as I walk into his living room, making sure to take off my shoes before going onto the carpet.
He comes back with a towel and wraps it around me after taking my bag and setting it at my feet. I mumble a thank you before taking a seat at the edge of his couch, completely on the other side from where he normally sits.
To my surprise he sits next to me and rubs my back, comforting me and drying me at the same time. We sit there in silence for a few minutes. I'm tired and not in the mood to fully explain what happened yet, so neither of us speak until I realize I should probably tell him why I came to his place so late and without warning.
Taglist: @ali-r3n @dixontardis @witchwolflea @micheledawn1975 @daydreaming-mood @idfwfeelings @adaydreamaway08 @preciousbumplingbee @rustboxstarr @plk-18 @teary-eyed-egg @needylilgal022 @exploding-bonbon @gagasbee @eddiemunsonsguitarpic @aol19 @thatwitchyoucouldntburn @meanlilbean @sonnyahngel @corrodedcass @pigwidgeonxo @marsmunson86 @lottie-90 @figmentofquinn @sareim123122 @eddies-puppet @gvf23 @kennedy-brooke @rocklees-wife @emma77645 @cherris-n-peaches @breehumbles @joequinn-love @anyoddthoughts @aysheashea @eddiesskittle @uncxmfxrtablex @cherrymedicine13 @mrsjellymunson @shotgunhallelujah @bambipowerblueaddition @hexqueensupreme @josephquinnsfreckles @harrysgothicbitch @paleidiot @smurfflynn @lilyungpeanut @selena-rocker27
#eddie stranger things#munson#eddie munson#eddie my love#eddie my beloved#female reader#oneshot#smut#eddie munson smut#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson x female reader#eddie munson fic#eddie munson x you#stranger things#stranger things 4#st4#stranger things season 4#eddie x reader
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Part One
for @vampiregirl1797
“I just feel like we should put all our cards on the table before we go...all in. I’d like to go all in, but I feel like we need to be straight with each other about some stuff.”
“Oooookay,” Eddie says slowly, lowering himself to sit at the table. He had to shuffle the chair back a bit to fit the bump, “uhm, right.” Eddie feels kind of sick. Not the morning sickness kind, that’s long gone now, just the regular this is the End Of The Steve Thing kind of sick. Because someone basically saying we need to talk has never, not once, turned out well.
So.
Eddie maybe hasn’t come clean about anything. Eddie’s maybe been spending months scenting Steve curled up on his couch watching shitty movies. Eddie maybe just said the pups father isn’t in the picture and didn’t elaborate. Eddie maybe thought Steve had just bought that.
But Steve wants the truth, and Eddie’s going to let him have it, even though when Steve finds out what a little drug dealing slut of an Omega Eddie has been, like, historically, this might be it for straight laced Steve.
The End.
“I started in the library because I was doing community restitution.”
Eddie’s brain screeches to a sort of halt. Because wait. This was about Eddie admitting he’s a shit human being, right? Not for Steve to admit to doing anything wrong…? Wasn't it?
“Community restitution?” Eddie starts slowly, “like...you’re a criminal?”
Steve snorts but then looks at the table, fiddling with his own fingers before he looks back up again, “yeah. Kinda’.”
“And the crime was..?”
“Property damage. Rob’s boss tried to touch her up and then when she walked he screwed her out of her last pay check. It was her word against his so that didn’t go anywhere and...I may have smashed a couple of windows. A dozen. A dozen windows. While intoxicated.”
Eddie can’t even imagine that. Steve’s wearing fucking slippers and he’s at home now, so he’s swapped into the glasses that have an old people chain so he can hang them around his neck and not loose them, “I mean. Sounds...like a fair response. Yeah. Okay.”
“Sure?” Steve looks uncertain.
“I mean? If that's the worst thing you've ever done I’m pretty sure were good?”
Steve hums, it’s not a positive sound, “you know I’m,” he indicates the sides of his head. Steve’s told Eddie about the concussions. The sports scholarship. The one too many hits to the head and then the burst eardrum and the following infections that fucked his hearing up real good and pretty conclusively ended his career before it even started.
“Yeah?”
“Right, so without them in, I mean, I don’t wear them to sleep.”
And Eddie hadn’t thought about that, didn’t realize, because he hasn’t actually slept with Steve yet. Because Steve was courting him. Properly courting him. They have date night. It’s so fucking domestic Eddie nearly turns inside out over it.
Also Steve works in a library and he read somewhere that the bite of an Alpha who is not the sire of the pup can, in a few rare cases, cause the Omega’s body to fail the pregnancy and like...reject the pup in favor of having another heat so it can carry the pup of their actual mate. Or something. And because of that Steve won’t do more than kiss Eddie. Because he’s not willing to even take the risk that he might bite Eddie in the heat of the moment. He’s so fucking committed he actually offered to get Eddie off. Was very clear that he wanted absolutely nothing in return, was just happy to do hand or even mouth stuff to keep Eddie happy if that’s what he wanted.
Steve is like, just, how is he even real? And obviously Eddie said no because he's not a complete dick and saying yes felt incredibly selfish, even though he's been kicking himself every day since because when Eddie makes a decision Steve fucking respects that.
Fucking perfect loveable bastard.
Which is as adorable as it is fucking frustrating. But Eddie has also agreed that they will wait. They will wait until the pups born. They will wait for such time as Eddie can fully focus on a relationship. Whatever Steve means by that because Eddie is horny and doesn’t really care for the waiting part but-
“So I’m pretty deaf, at night.”
“Riiiight…?” Eddie has no idea where Steve’s going with this. Eddie is clearly fucking missing something along the line here.
“So when the pup cries at night, I won’t hear it. Like I definitely won’t hear it. And I get that, someone who can help more would be more appealing. Sometimes I don’t hear so good if there’s a lot of noise, so I’m worried if the pup cries and like, the TV’s on or something, I might not hear right away. And if you’re tired, I want to help at night, it’s not fair if you have to wake up all the time. I know I should have said something sooner but honestly it only really occurred to me today at work-”
Eddie’s heart is fucking melting into his guts. This is too much. Steve Harrington who smashes windows in defense of his best friend's honor. Steve Harrington who actually worries about his ability to look after another Alpha’s pup. This man. Eddie doesn’t know what to do and now his stupid face is leaking because he cries at fucking everything at the moment and Steve is looking at him absolutely horrified. Jesus Christ on a cracker.
Steve dashes around the table and dabs Eddie’s eyes with his own sleeve, while Eddie blubs incoherently about how perfect Steve is and how he’s the best Alpha ever.
So. There’s that.
Later, when Eddie’s finally managed to stop crying, but is lying splotchy faced on the couch, admits to Steve, “I’m not sure who the Alpha is. And they’re all douches so I didn’t want to hang around to find out.”
“Oh,” Steve says quietly, rubbing at Eddie’s knee, “do you want to find out now?”
“Still no. And, I get if you think it’s...wrong or...selfish...or whatever. I understand if you...you know, don’t like that I was sleeping around a bit.”
Steve seems to actually ponder that for a while, so Eddie decides to go all in and put the final nail in his own coffin, “also, I used to sell drugs. And do drugs. Some drugs. But not now. Not touched it since I found out about the pup. Haven’t been selling since I came back. Or smoking actually,” Eddie sighs, “could kill for a smoke right now though.”
Steve’s quiet for a long time, thinking. “Is the Alpha...likely to find out? Could this come back on you?”
Eddie bites his lip, taking a moment over it, “I don’t see how it ever could, no.”
Steve sighs, “okay, and clearly you weren't being safe, so did you get tested?”
Eddie swallows thickly, desperately trying not to start crying again, the embarrassment of admitting this out loud to Steve, Steve who is just so much better than him, might eat him alive, “yeah. Yeah, first uhm, appointment I had with the Omega nurse, we did all that. I’m all good. And I haven’t...been with anyone, since I got back to Hawkins.”
“So, basically, you found out about your pup and changed everything about your life, so you could do the best thing you possibly could for you baby, practically overnight?”
“I- I mean. I’ve tried?”
Steve pulls Eddie up and into his lap, so they can scent each other thoroughly, “Eddie, I think you’re wonderful.”
And Eddie shoves his face harder into Steve’s neck because he’s pretty sure his whole face is bright red with blush.
Eddie’s knee is bouncing, making the chain from his wallet jiggle, but he doesn’t seem to be able to make it stop. Steve rests his hand on Eddie’s disobedient knee; that works.
When Eddie’s name gets called, he goes, knowing that Steve is right behind him. They do the boring bit, and then Eddie is getting up on the bed and then the nurse is saying, “are you staying?” With a frown on her face.
And Steve looks down to Eddie and Eddie says, “yes?” and is then suddenly bristling at the side eye they are both getting from this nurse. Because yes, okay, Eddie doesn’t have a bite, and yes, fine, he and Steve aren’t mated but god dammit he wants Steve here for this.
He can feel the stupid nurse judging him and he fucking hates it but then Steve is squeezing his fingers reassuringly and yeah, okay, that does make it better.
Eddie doesn’t like the cold gel or the pressure, but he does love hearing his pups heartbeat. He really fucking does. It’s quick and strong and perfect.
“Would you like to know the sex?”
Eddie looks at Steve, but Steve’s just smiling and shrugging and being all perfect still. Happy to go along with whatever Eddie wants. Everything Eddie wants. Even though it’s technically not Steve’s choice anyway, even though it’s not Steve’s pup. Even though all of that, some Alphas would be presumptuous enough to pass an opinion, or worse; Steve absolutely never has.
And Eddie was always the kind of kid who shook the Christmas gifts, who couldn’t sleep, who couldn’t wait.
“Yeah, yeah please?”
“It’s a girl.”
“A girl,” and Eddie can feel the waterworks starting up again already and it doesn’t help when he looks up and Steve is looking at the screen with a look of wonder on his face. Steve looks like he’s in love. “I’d like to refer you though, for a routine investigation.”
Eddie’s nerves spark even though the nurse lady hasn’t given any indication of anything being wrong, “what for?”
She hums, moving the wand thing around, “it’s reasonably common in male Omega that their hips are too narrow to safely pass the pup. And from what I see here you may fall into that category, we should find out now and not in the delivery room.”
Steve squeezes Eddie’s hand again, “yeah. Yeah, makes sense.”
At least it means there’s no guesswork. Eddie isn’t waiting to go into labor; his narrow hips mean he has a date and time to meet his pup. He wants Steve with him, Wayne doesn’t even question it; is happy to sit in the waiting room with his newspaper and wordie or whatever that thing is he plays on his phone. There’s a curtain up, and Eddie can’t feel a fucking thing from the chest down because of the godamn terrifying needle thing they’ve put in his spine. So at least there’s that.
It feels like forever and no time at all, a lifetime of trying desperately not to panic while Steve holds his hand tight and tells him everything is okay. And god Eddie wants to snap and ask him where his sudden medical degree has come from, but he doesn’t, he bites it back, knows it’s the fear talking.
And then there’s a pup crying and she’s a bit gross and covered in gack but she’s being deposited straight onto Eddie’s bare chest and he doesn’t know what to do because suddenly he’s a parent. But Steve coos down at her and doesn’t seem at all phased by the gack when he holds her tiny hand oh so gently in his big one.
Eddie wakes up, and his calves are throbbing. He feels like he's actually run somewhere, and has the worst cramp. But then, he wriggles his toes and realizes he can feel everything again, even if he wishes he couldn't because everything fucking hurts.
Right behind that, he remembers why everything fucking hurts, and that startles him the rest of the way awake, suddenly flooded with panic because where is-?
Oh. All he has to do it look to the side, and she's right there, swaddled up in Steve's arms, Steve comfortably feeding her a bottle.
Steve must sense he's awake grinning over, "did you see how much hair she has? It's going to be just like yours." And Steve looks so absolutely delighted by that simple thing, and Eddie can't help but think that maybe this whole thing will work out okay.
#eddie munson#steve harrington#stranger things#steddie#ao3 writer#ficlet#mpreg#omega eddie munson#omega eddie because he's so pretty#alpha steve harrington#omegaverse
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This morning I said goodbye to my childhood dog, Kody. He was 18 years old. He was my baby. My best friend. My whole heart. I love him so much.
I remember the first time we met Kody at the animal shelter. He was actually named Tyra then because the staff had thought he was female. Then the first thing he did in our meet-n-greet was try to pee on my brother's leg, and the staff member with us at the time was like, "oops I think this may be a boy actually." So of course we had to take him. When my dad was signing the adoption forms, the desk person asked what he wanted to rename "Tyra" to since "Tyra" was actually a boy. My dad, put on the spot, just went, "uhhhhh Tyrone?" We still laugh about it to this day.
So my dog went from being a Tyra, to a Tyrone, and then to a Kody, because that was the name us kids wanted. I remember the way we thought that name up was because we watched a lot of the Disney show "Suite Life of Zack and Cody" at that time. But we changed the "C" to a "K" because in our kid minds it made the name cooler and more unique.
Kody was a weird little guy. He had a lot of anxiety, which meant he fit right into our family. He didn't get along with many dogs unless they were old and calm and it took him a while to warm up to strangers. When he went on walks, he would have to go and pee on every tree we came across, even though he had nothing left in the chamber and was just doing the motions. He liked to climb on top of the couch and the loveseat and nap there. He liked to nap in warm piles of fresh laundry and patches of sunlight too. We always joked that he acted more like a cat than a dog. When I tried giving him bones or chews, all he'd do was roll on them and then go stuff them under the couch or behind a shelf without chewing them. Actually, Kody was pretty picky with his food in the early days. Maybe because my mom kept giving him table food. But as he got into senior age, he got less picky. Kody also loved getting nightly scratches from my dad. He'd lay in my dad's lap and get so relaxed from the scratching. I'd get a little jealous because I couldn't get Kody to stay in my lap as long as my dad could.
The only command we ever managed to teach Kody was "sit" and he was real good at it if he knew you had a treat in hand. However when he got older and began developing dementia as well as gradually loosing his sight and hearing, he lost the command. The first time I realized he didn't know how to sit anymore, I cried. The first time I realized that Kody didn't know how to wag his tail anymore, I cried. Watching him deteriorate from what he once was, watching the shine in his eyes become dull and cloudy, watching as he gradually lost the ability to do more and more things... it was so painful.
Last night Kody came over to me and laid his head in my lap and fell asleep. It was the first time he had done that in months. I just sat there and pet him and cried. Now I can never pet him or hold him or kiss him on the head again. And it feels so unbearably, unimaginably painful. I can barely comprehend it. It feels like I'm in a nightmare. It feels like my heart's been ripped out of my chest. It feels like a part of my world is ending. But I know I will be okay eventually. I have to be.
Kody, you were a very good boy. The best dog/cat/rat in the world. I'm going to miss hearing your little feet pitter-pattering across the floor. I'll miss your barking when the doorbell rings. Your excited whines in the car. How you would roll on your back for belly rubs. The way you would burrow under the blankets or just shove them around until you made a nest. Your snores and funny twitches when you're deep asleep. How your fur was soft on top your head and then got coarser on your back. How big and round your eyes were. I'm going to miss it all so much. I hope you know how loved you are. And I hope we meet again someday. Thank you for everything, Kody. I love you.
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i don’t deserve you
//
Luke Hughes x Reader
authors note: i wrote this super quick and also on my phone so idk the word count or if this even makes sense because it is unedited lmaooo but I hope you enjoy it!
-
You had just hopped out of the shower and were putting on uour leggings and one of lukes hoodies to wear for the day.
You hadnt really been wearing anything besides for lukes hoodies when you have a day at home since you two started dating so honestly it was nothing new.
Going back to your room after cleaning up the rest of your stuff in the bathroom, you remembered you forgot to text Luke back last night. he always gets on you about that but you always forget how worried he gets when you don’t reply to his calls or texts.
And when you head to look at your phone that’s plugged into the charger on your bedside table, you see many missed notifications from your worried boyfriend.
(4 missed called from: Lukey @ 10:37am)
Lukey: hey you said you’d call me at 10?
Lukey: call me back pls
it was now nearing 12:00pm and you knew he would be more than a little bit pissed off that you weren’t answering him.
and you felt terrible about forgetting so you unplug your phone and called him back right away, sat on your bed with a towel around yojr hair as the phone rings in suspense.
“baby? ...let me guess? you forgot to check your phone again?..” he quickly says as you are getting more comfortable on the bed, relieved he had answered your call.
You just hum in response as he pours out his concern to you, knowing that all he’s saying is true.
“i’m so so sorry. i completely forgot. i know you’re looking out for me but i fell asleep without texting and i literally just got out of the shower.” You say and hear him sigh at your words.
“Luke i promise i’ll try to keep my phone close by cuz i know you worry...but i’m fine i promise” you say apologetically .
“i didn’t get murdered or anything..” you add jokingly but quickly follow up with an “i’m kidding...” before luke gets a chance to be a smart ass and tell you not to joke about that.
You laugh a little hearing him sigh with an unamused tone in his voice.
“anyway, how are you?” You ask trying to move on from the subject knowing he is already annoyed about you not answering his calls.
“i really miss you...” he sighs out and you hear the little bit of sadness in his voice and instantly feel exactly how he’s feeling.
“i miss you more bubs...trust me time will fly by way faster than you know it…we’ll see each other soon..i promise.” You reassure him, not trying to sound too cheesy but also trying to lift his spirits somewhat.
it’s been over 2 months since you’ve seen each other last. School has picked up and made it impossible to be able to visit him in jersey, even just for a weekend.
You were starting to forget a time where it actually was easy to see each other.
And you were getting so used to late night phone calls to one another, and luke sending you random long ass text messages about how much he misses you at random hours of the night. and you being so fed up with everything that you cave and just call him even when you know he’s busy or at practice, because you miss hearing his voice so much.
“it’s just been so long since i’ve seen your face. ugh i hate this shit so much. i’m just... so fucking over it.” Luke continues pouring out and his words are laced with a bit of anger, causing his voice to have a scratchy and dark quality.
he’s clearly getting more and more frustrated about the current situation the longer it goes on and you know he’s getting irritated with only being able to talk on the phone and over facetime. we both are.
“Luke i understand... i miss you and i love you so much. And look, i know you’re upset but there’s really not much we can do about it right now is there?” You say before luke interrupts you with a loud sigh.
“hey what can i do though? huh? ...how can i help you feel better?” You ask with as much reassurance in your voice as possible, trying hard to keep your voice high and uplifting even though youre feeling just as down and unhappy as he is right now.
he doesn’t answer and you are sat in silence for too long to still be expecting him to answer your question.
“what’s on your mind? Will u just talk to me?” You ask innocently.
“ugh. fuck! i don’t know! nothing i guess.” Luke sighs out, raising his voice and catching you off guard.
“i’m just trying to help … can you calm down a little..” you say quietly because you know he was probably wound up about a lot of stuff on his mind and you can tell that he is putting his anger in the wrong places.
“you don’t need to tell me to calm down...there’s nothing you can do ok? it’s fucking awful. i hate this...fuck..” he spits out at me. “can we just talk about something else?” he asks with his voice still raised.
“look, im not trying to force you to talk to me if you don’t want to but you called me and clearly something is on your mind..whether it’s the fact that we can’t be together right now or something else but you can’t just get angry with me for no reason.” You say sternly and hear him about to say something more but you interrupt him “just please lower your voice...” you add.
“i’m not getting angry. i’m just really fucking annoyed and you’re not helping” he says exasperatedly and you are taken by surprise with his words and a little pissed off that he’s taking out whatever he is angry about at you.
You stay silent on the other end of the phone as his words instantly put tears into yohr eyes and you don’t say anything because he is being so unnecessarily rude to you.
“i’m sorry, i’m just having a really fucking bad day...” he adds and you hold your breath trying to not make your shaky breathing noticeable as he keep talking.
You begin to feel the tears slowly start to stream down your face but you quickly blink them away knowing he’s only mad about the situation and not worth yours tears. but his words made you feel so so hurt.
there’s silence between the both of you for a few seconds as you try to get yourself together and acknowledge that he hurt you.
“Ok. Im not gonna sit here and listen to you complain about something that i literally cannot fix or change right now. i’m sorry you’re feeling upset and angry with what’s going on but you can’t just call me and take all your fucking anger out on me. it’s just not fair. i really miss you too ok? ...i’m sorry we can’t be together right now but i can’t do anything to help if you’re not going to tell me what’s actually wrong...just...call me back when you calm down a little” you say trying your hardest to not raise your voice and lash out exactly like he just did to you.
he’s quiet on the other side of the phone and you hear him about to reply as you hang up the phone before he has the chance to respond, knowing you are probably not going to like or want to hear what he has to say to you at this moment anyway.
this isn’t the first conversation that’s went like this recently. this past week luke has been getting more and more pissed off and angry rather than just upset about you not being able to see each other right now and it’s not doing you any good.
Youve been trying your hardest to just hear him out and be there for him but today’s conversation was different, usually you share a mutual sadness about not being able to see each other and talk about all the things you miss and then it cheers you both up hearing all the fun things you can do together once exams and the hockey season ends.
but today luke wouldn’t even tell you what was bothering him without getting mad and it didn’t help that he was putting his anger towards you.
Feeling really frustrated about that conversation, you plug your phone back into the charger and start to feel a slight sinking in your stomach.
You hated the fact that you just hung up on him and didn’t resolve your discussion. And you knkw it was his fault for getting angry at you but can’t help but feel a little guilty for just hanging up the phone without saying goodbye.
to get your mind off of it for a while you start tidying up your room and play some music to drown out the silence.
Now it’s almost nearing 2pm and luke hasn’t called back or even texted and it’s been almost an hour.
You begin to get more and more pissed off that he hasn’t said anything and consider just sending him a text but you remember the things he said to you . so you ignore the feeling and continue waiting for him to call you back.
-
After deciding to lay down and read a book to distract yourself, you accidentally fell asleep for a few hours. Waking up to see that it’s around 6pm...you definitely slept longer than you should have.
Surprisingly, you see that luke tried calling back and left a few texts as well.
Lukey: hi
Lukey: i’m really sorry about earlier
Lukey: can you call me back please? i need to apologize...i didn’t mean to get upset at you. i know none of this is your fault
Lukey: please call me back
You decide not to answer him right away and start making yourself some mac and cheese and sitting at the dining room table waiting as you wait for the water to boil.
You were beginning to get so impatient. Impatient with everything, but especially with luke. You wanted him to call you again. Do something, say something. Try harder.
Your thoughts were spiraling and you knew calling him back was really the only way to stop them.
After finishing making and eating your dinner you sit down at the couch to finally call luke back. at this point your stupid argument definitely didn’t feel worth all this and you felt a little guilty for ignoring him all day long.
You ultimately decide to facetime him so you can see his face and he answers you on the second ring.
immediately you see him laying down in his bed wearing no shirt and his wet hair hanging down his face on one side and his face slightly smushed against his pillow.
he smiles at you knowingly and waits for you to say something so that he knows if i’m still angry at him or not.
“why are you staring at me?” You blush a little, ignoring your anger for a moment. he just smiles back at you with his pretty little face and completely ignores the question.
Luke sees you awkward laugh a little feeling a bit insecure with the way he’s staring at you, but he continues. and he laughs lightly as he sits up and turns the light on so that you can see him better.
“i’m really really sorry baby...” he starts “i’m sorry for getting upset at you. I shouldn’t have done that. i was just so fed up and tired of not being able to see you and i let my feelings get the best of me, i also was just having a really shitty day. Practice fucking sucked today and you already know how shitty our game has been lately.” He says with honest sincerity and regret in his voice.
“i took my anger out at you which i should not have done...and im really not trying to make any excuses because I know i hurt you. And i promise i won’t get mad at you about this ever again, especially since you did absolutely nothing wrong...” he spills out apologetically.
You say nothing at first and just wait for him to continue his apology. making it clear to him that he was completely out of hand and you are not gonna put up with his bitchy attitude. And he continues,
“... to be honest i’ve been feeling like you don’t miss me as much as i miss you which sounds stupid but i just got so angry because i didn’t understand. When you forget to call or text i just…i take it hard..” he says trailing off at the end.
“what? luke i’ve been trying so hard to keep it together for you because i know how upset this makes you. trust me when i tell you i miss you more than anything...i suck at remembering things like texting goodnight and stuff because I’ve just been so exhausted with work and school. You’re on my mind all the time and i promise you that i will try harder to not forget those things.” you quickly reply, making sure he understands just how much you mean it.
“i love you so much.” You add and smile at him as uou see his small smile on your phone screen.
“i love you too baby. i’m so sorry for getting mad..” he says quietly and puts his head down a little.
“it’s ok...i understand your frustration.” You add with a little laugh letting him know you’re over it.
“i saw your instagram story..” you change the subject and he smiles at you with his face getting a bit red.
“You posted us?” You say knowingly as he smirks at you and runs his hands through his hair.
Luke had posted a slightly blurry photo of the two of you on the boat last summer saying he misses both the summer and you. It made you melt to see him gush about you, especially because he was typically such a private person.
“You are so cute..” you say honestly. and youstart to laugh a little remembering that night on the boat together and how it was the night luke asked you to be his girlfriend.
Luke wasnt always the most romantic person but he put so much thought into that night, his words, every little thing he planned he put so much care into and it was such a beautiful moment.
You would never forget it.
“im glad you saw it. i wanted to show you how much you mean to me..and how sorry i was.” he chuckles and it makes you softly laugh, knowing the world would have no idea that post was technically an apology to you.
“will you stay on FaceTime with me tonight? i miss falling asleep with you…” you ask politely and luke nods his head and smiles at you.
“of course...” he replies.
“i’m glad you’re not mad at me anymore baby” He says quietly.
“I could never stay mad at you..” you say knowing how true of a statement it honestly was.
“...and I don’t deserve you” luke says almost in a whisper, seemingly more to himself as opposed to you
-
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#devils lb#nj devils#nhl#luke hughes#new jersey devils#hockey blurb#hockey imagine#luke hughes fluff#luke hughes x reader#luke hughes fic#luke hughes angst#luke hughes imagine#nj devils imagine#hockey x reader#hockeyblr
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So, I cancelled Nyxlin Week and deleted the event blog. Edit to clarify: I DELETED THE BLOG MYSELF! IT WAS NOT TAKEN DOWN BY TUMBLR BECAUSE OBVIOUSLY THERE WAS NOTHING ON THERE THAT WENT AGAINST TOS.
I originally wanted to do this event mainly because me and Copy have a bunch of Nyxlin art planned anyway and that way we could also encourage some more content out of a few other peers.
I expected SOME people to get miffed, maybe some angry anons, some hate posts, because we all know this fandom has lost all its hinges somewhere long ago (if it ever had them) and people are absolutely incapable to just ignore something they don't like. At first we thought a super silly banner might help against that, but clearly that was a big lapse of judgment on my part lol Either way, I wasn't too worried because there's nothing people can really do that bothers me and once the event would roll around everyone would realize there's nothing actually sinister about it, so I figured it would be fine.
What I did not expect, however, was the absolute insane behavior that ended up taking place, where people got targeted and their posts mass reported to take advantage of tumblrs shitty report system over absolutely fucking nothing. People who were not even involved in the event, just happened to write for the same pairing. So let me ask this very plainly: What the fuck is wrong with you? Because something definitely is and I hope you all are getting it checked out.
So I decided to call it quits because people getting hurt over it is obviously not worth it. And again, no wonder this fandom lacks a nice variety of artists who participate in events. What's the point? You canon obsessed pea-brained pearl-clutchers don't understand fan spaces or creativity. All you seem to be here for is virtual signalling, hate, bullying and demonstrating a severe lack of reading comprehension. I've had months of this high school bullshit now and I've really had enough.
I'm still gonna post my art (oh and all that Nyxlin stuff is not going anywhere, don't worry), but I am taking a step back from participating in fandom weeks and fandom discourse and whatnot. You guys can rip each other apart on your own.
#(like seriously there were like two other fandom dramas going on while this happened y'all need to CHILL)#this is gonna be my tamlin acosf era lmao#thrum rambles#fandom woes#nyxlin
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hello! Can you write a Clarisse La Rue x reader where they met before Clarisse got sent to camp halfblood when they were little and were best friends then Clarisse left for camp with no explanation then years later reader goes to camp and sees Clarisse for the first time in years and it’s kinda awkward but cute
thanks :)
This is kinda long sooorrry, to help, the part where she gets to camp (kinda) will be in green
Girls on film 📷
Clarrise la rue x fem!reader
Warnings and explanations: bad words (take the kids out of the living room she swears) gender is specified cause it was written as wlw, but it doenst actually makes a diference, fluff, like two sentences, there is a kiss in the picture but they dont actually kiss sorry.
Unspecified parent gender for both sides so yall can pick wichever
Trying not to kill myself.
That was what i was doing 15 hours ago, just as any normal teenagers living (or as i prefer saying fighting for the soul to stay on the body) during finals week.
In my room there was nothing but piles and piles of normal work, piles for extra credit, piles of old quizzes to try to get me prepared for the new ones and a dumb incomplete project for photography class that was due tomorrow.
Okay ill admit, i had a month to make that, and all i needed to do was shoot pictures, but that was the problem, i prefer taking pictures of people, their emotions, whatever they might be, just never ceases to amaze me.
And my dumb project made take pictures of....landscapes.
Not too bad, if i had any actual real talent for that type of photography, but i dont, every picture gets ruined somehow, its the lightning, the lack of it, my camera falls, gets full of dirt and i get so mad that i just give up.
That whole speach was necessary for me to explain what i was doing 14 hours ago, and that would explain what i was doing 5 minutes ago.
14 hours ago i decided to shoot the photos, i could try many times before it got dark, and if o was lucky enough i wouldnt go insane before the golden hour, and could actually get some nice pictures.
I grabbed my totte bag taking with me only the necessary, camera stuff, the camera, some snacks and my notebook to upload the pictures before i went mad.
13 hours ago i was running to save my life.
And do you know that moment went you go through so much your mind decides to erase it?
That happened, now, what i do remember, i was sitting in a bench by a calm road not too far from the town, i had got some actually good pictures, some of me, some of the trees, some of a butterfly, maybe three cars had passed by since i was there, driving slowly, always saying hi and doing a thumbs up, normal, friendly people from the town.
And then i heard a noise that shook the trees.
I remember seeing something, but never what, i remember running to home as fast as i could, feeling my heartbeats in my neck, i remember the noise, but the people in the streets looked at me like there was nothing behind me and i went crazy
I remember getting home, having a desperate talk with my parent while they got my suiticase ready, and i dont remember a single word.
I remember a funny looking guy my age that got to my house, with goat legs and a more desperate look, and i remember one last hug before i left.
And thats all, aside from a hell of a lot of running nobody cares.
Aparently i passed out from shock or exaustion because i woke up in a unknown place, at night, in a hospital bed, with no actual doctors other than 15 year olds teenagers.
And a horseman standing in the corner, with quite a intelectual look actually.
And let me tell you guys that after the talk we had, if somebody told me i would marry queen Elizabeth within 4 days, i would just belived it.
Because nothing ever in my life would ACTUALLY beat up the level of crazyness of finding out i DO have another parent, they are just, A FUCKING GOD. GREEK. GODS. AH.
Then, after telling me my whole life was in fact, a big fat lie, the horseman... left.
Telling me i should sleep in the infirmary this night for precaution and that he was going to get me to a cabin tomorrow.
Like that was the most normal thing to ever happen to a human, he said goodnight and left.
While i sat there just trying to...basically form a sentence that wasnt "for fucks sake what the fuck was that"
I would have loved to say that i did slept that night, dreaming about glory and greek myths but that did not happened, at all.
I walked around the infirmary for hours, opening every cabinet and trying to make my mind to something, i searched for my stuff, and thankfully found my camera, with some pictures i hadnt noticed i had taken, one specific had a blurred thing in the forest.
When the first rays of sunlight appeared i got dressed, and decided that, in order to prove to myself (and probably to the mental hospital afterwards) i was not insane, i needed proof that i was actually living, actually there, being a demigodess, thats what they called.
Very few people were up already, and i did received some weird looks, it was clear nobody knew me, that was fine, i didnt knew anybody either.
I walked around taking some pictures, sometimes getting lost, but everything amazed me, the forest, the cabins, the stables, i found the entrance to a beach too, and then i got to the training area, aparently, i stayed far away, god forbid i woke up from this nightmare with a spear in my head, oh no, that would be bad.
Openning my camera i zoomed in the people, my speciality, it was sweet, seeing them trully smile, and not pretend for the picture, it was a genuine feeling the camera would keep forever, i zoomed around other peoples faces, but my camera focused on a face i could never forget, and she looked back at me, and realized i was there, but not that i was me, because she came towards me with a angry look.
Ill admit, the look scared me as hell, so much i tried to pretend i was never taking pictures of her, i slightly changed the angle and kept my face hidden behind the camera.
Do i need to say that did not fucking worked? No? Thank you.
"Who the fuck do you think you are taking random pictures of pe-"
She yanked my camera off of me mid sentence and stopped completely, looking like she had seen a ghost for some seconds.
"(Y/n)?"
"Clari?"
"How- what are you doing here!?"
She asked, with a worried look, still kind of confused, she did this look since we were little girls, and for a moment i had a big deja vu.
Two little girls running around, playing all day, telling each other secrets and stories, running to hug each other eveytime they were close, i still saw that girl in her eyes, but by her previous look, she did not.
"What am i doing here? What are YOU doing here? One day you dissapear without a trace, and your family said you went to a new school even though it was the summer, and now i find you sparring with a spear? You are that too? A demigoddes, i mean?"
I spoke fast, nervous, as if my time in the world with her would end just as it did once.
Instead of responding me right away, clarisse did something that maybe would scare every single soul she knew in the past years.
She hugged me. Hard.
Breathing me in, and not letting me go exactly as you would expect of someone who hasnt seen me in years.
"I couldnt tell you anything... it wouldnt be safe...im sorry, i missed my friend... i missed you."
I just looked at her for some seconds, and then hugged her again, this time i was the one making it extra tight, i was the one going insane by the reconforting smell of her shampoo, praying that she couldnt feel my heartbeats against her chest, and how strong they were.
"Just.. dont leave me again okay? And ill forgive you, i promisse"
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New surroundings | Alessia Russo
Pairing: Alessia Russo x Reader & Katie McCabe x Best Friend!Reader
Reader pronouns used: she/her
Prompts: "If there is nothing going on between you two, you don't mind if I ask her on a date, do you?" & "You love me?"
Warnings: Toxic ex, some slight angst, and alcohol consumption. Plus, I feel like drunk ex trying to get back together should be one.
Masterlist | Woso masterlist | Words: 3.8k
Arsenal was the closest team you had ever been a part of. You joined the club about four months ago, back then you had only known Katie. The two of you had played together for Ireland since you were around fifteen, and she had become one of your best friends years back. Katie had taken you under her wing at this new club, and introduced you to all your new teammates. You felt like a part of the team right away, loving the team bonding nights they had, it made you get to know the girls better, and it helped to keep your mind occupied.
When Arsenal’s offer had come your way, your long term relationship had just ended. You loved Manchester and playing for Manchester City, but training and playing alongside your ex-girlfriend was a lot, especially since the break-up wasn’t on good terms. So, you took the offer and moved to London, after finishing the two months that were left on your contract with Manchester City. So far, you loved playing for Arsenal, and the girls on the team had quickly become your friends.
Tonight’s team building took place at Leah’s house, you had all just headed inside after enjoying a lovely dinner in her backyard together. You weren’t paying much attention to the conversations around you, as your eyes kept making their way towards Alessia, she looked absolutely stunning. Katie had noticed you staring, and walked your way, “Enjoying the view?” You roll your eyes at your best friend, regretting over and over again that you told her about your crush on Alessia. “When are you going to ask her out?” Your smile falters slightly, “You know why I haven’t.” You had endless late night conversations with her, about not knowing if you could allow yourself to trust a person like that again. “Plus, it’s not like you have asked out Caitlin yet.” You add, lightening up the conversation quickly. “Fair point.” Katie places a reassuring hand on your shoulder, knowing where your thoughts were at. Even though you were worried about allowing yourself to open up to another person that way, you would be lying if you said you hadn’t thought about trying to with Alessia.
On the other side of the room Leah nudges Alessia, “I see you’re having a great time tonight, Russo” The woman mocks, having just witnessed the forward stalk your Instagram page. “She’s in the same room, maybe you should just talk to her.” Alessia quickly scrambles for an excuse to be on your profile, and finally comes up with, “Oh, I was just looking up something that I was talking about with Katie earlier.” Leah nods like she believes her, "If there is nothing going on between you two, you don't mind if I ask her on a date, do you?" Without waiting for a response Leah starts making her way over to you. Alessia quickly comes into action, and gets to you before Leah does.
“Can we talk?” Alessia says when you notice her speeding your way. “Yeah, sure. Is everything okay, Less?” She nods, and asks you to follow her, more so to create space between you and Leah. Completely unaware that Leah was just trying to push her closer to admitting her feelings for you.
Alessia walks you to the backyard, where the two of you sit down. “Less, you’re worrying me, what’s going on?” It only just dawned on Alessia that now she would actually have to tell you something. She takes a deep breath before going for it. “This wasn’t how I planned on telling you this, but Leah was going to ask you out but I couldn’t let her without telling you something first. Y/n, I like you, like in the I want to take you out on dates and stuff, and I’ve just been too scared to say anything. I just knew that I had to before Leah talked to you, unless you would rather have her be the one telling you this, then I’ll go.” You shake your head, “No, I want it to be you. I like you too, Less.” Alessia’s smile widens, and you feel your heart melt at the sight.
“I do want to be open about something before we continue this conversation.” You say nervously, not having thought you’d be having this conversation, let alone with the girl you’ve been crushing on. “Of course, anything.” Alessia reassures. ”So, I don’t know if you’ve heard the ins and outs by now, but my last relationship ended pretty badly.” Alessia shakes her head, “I try my best to let people's private lives stay private.” Your breakup had been pretty public, as your ex was spotted with a new partner only a week after she had broken up with you, most of the public not even aware that you had broken up yet. So, hearing Alessia say that meant a lot. “If you don’t mind I don’t want to get into that too much now, let’s just say that that relationship left a lot of emotional scars.” You take a breath before continuing. “I guess what I am trying to say is that if you and I were to start something, I would need us to take things very slow. So, yeah, just that as a heads up, because I would understand if that’s not something you’re looking for.”
Alessia, who was listening carefully to your words, simply nods. “We can take it as slow as you need us to, I’m not going anywhere.” Her words mean so much to you, you could already tell that she respected your boundaries, you hoped that it would stay that way. “Can I kiss you?” You ask shyly, hoping that you didn’t ruin the moment by sharing what you just did. “Yes, you can.” Alessia smiles and leans in, you share a short but sweet kiss, knowing your teammates are all inside.
The following weeks, you felt yourself getting more and more comfortable around Alessia, she kept respecting your boundary of taking things slow. The two of you had spoken more about what went down with your ex, just because you wanted to give Alessia some insight into the things you might struggle with more than others. It was hard not to fall for her, she was kind, thoughtful, and loving, still you had your doubts that it wouldn’t all switch up to the moment you got too comfortable.
“So, how are things going with Russo?” Katie asks as she sits down on the couch with you, having planned a relaxing evening together before your match tomorrow. “Yeah, I think it’s going well. I really like her, she has been amazing so far. We went on our first date yesterday, which was really nice.” It makes Katie happy to see you smile so much when talking about Alessia. “Though, if I’m being honest, I’m still scared that she’ll start treating me the same way that Jenny did.” Katie takes a moment to make sure she will say the right thing, Jenny got her angry and she knew you needed a different side of her right now. “I understand why you would feel scared, Jenny was well she was horrible to you, and like I’ve said before you deserve someone who treats you well. I think that Alessia is someone who will do that, I mean just see the way she has got you smiling. Alessia isn’t Jenny, and though it might take a bit for your mind to wrap around being treated in a good way by your partner, I know you and Alessia are good for each other.” You smile at her reassuring words, “Okay, enough about me, what about you? Any update on the Caitlin front?” By the way Katie starts blushing you know there is. “McCabe, why did you start with me? Tell me everything!” Katie tells you about how she asked Caitlin out for lunch yesterday, how great it went, and about walking her home and kissing her on her front porch. “I am so happy for you.” You say as you give your best friend a quick hug.
Katie was getting some snacks from the kitchen while you opened up Netflix to pick out a movie. You had just set up the movie you chose when your phone buzzed. You quickly grab it, hoping to see Alessia’s name on your screen, but your smile falters when the name on your screen reads Jenny Jones. Without opening the message you quickly put your phone down on the couch again. Katie comes back into the living room, and you start the movie. Your phone keeps buzzing, but you try to ignore it. “Will you please just look at your phone?” Not wanting to make a scene you grab your phone and open your messages, not reading the words on your screen.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” Katie says worriedly, noticing the change in your facial expression. “Nothing.” You lie, even though you know Katie won’t believe you. Katie takes your phone from your hands, and you let her. “Why is she texting you? I thought you told her to stop contacting you.” You shrug, “I did.” Katie reads through the messages. “She makes me so angry. Y/n, you know that none of what she’s saying is true right?” You nod, “She’s probably just trying to get in my head before tomorrow’s game.” You’d be playing your old club, and that still included your ex-girlfriend. You talk a bit more about the messages with Katie, “Are you going to tell Alessia about the messages?” You weren’t looking forward to it, but knew that it would be best to tell her. “Yeah, I’ll tell her tomorrow morning. She’s picking me up for the match.”
You rush to the door when you hear the doorbell, Alessia was early, and you weren’t done getting ready, probably because you were going over and over again how you could best tell her about the messages from Jenny. Nonetheless, you open the door with a smile, “Good morning Less.” She returns the smile and pecks your cheek. “I got some coffee on the way.” You thank her and let her into your apartment. “Just give me one second, I still have to get changed.” You quickly make your way over to your bedroom, to change into your training gear.
Once you’re back in the living room, you sip on your coffee. “So, how are you feeling about playing your old club?” Alessia starts the conversation. “I have mixed feelings about it. It will be weird playing against them, but I am also excited to see some of my old teammates again.” Alessia nods, “Yeah, I completely get you. Playing my old club left me with very similar thoughts.” She pauses for a moment before she continues. “Tell me if you don’t want to talk about it but what about-.” She struggles to find the right way to ask you, so you guess the rest of the sentence for her, “Jenny?” She nods. “I am not looking forward to that part, I haven’t seen her since I moved, and that’s been really nice. There was something I wanted to share with you, now that we are on the topic. She started texting me yesterday, I said to Katie that she’s probably just trying to get into my head before the game. I’m not planning on responding or anything, I just wanted to let you know.” You show her the texts, not wanting anything to come between what you and Alessia were building.
Jenny Jones: Getting your first start tomorrow, congrats. I can’t wait for you to screw it up
Jenny Jones: You think you’re a part of the team but the only reason they tolerate you is because of McCabe
Jenny Jones: They just petty you
Jenny Jones: Anyways, see you tomorrow x
“I’m so sorry she said all of that, it’s not true you know?” She puts a reassuring hand on your shoulder, and you fall into her arms immediately. Alessia holds you while you cry, whispering sweet nothings into your ear. “You are going to be amazing. You are such a great defender, and you will ace this match. Jonas put you as a starting player because he believes in you. I believe in you, the whole team does. We love having you here, and you are as much a part of this team as the rest of the girls.” Alessia was saying all the right words, she continued stroking your back even when you stopped crying. “I love you, Less.” The words slip out before you realize it. Alessia’s hands freeze in place. "You love me?" You felt like you should be stressing out more about having just told her that you love her, but it felt right so you sit back up so you can look her in the eyes. “I do. Is that okay?” Alessia’s smile grows, “Yes, that is very okay.” She pulls you back in for a hug, “I love you too, y/n/n.”
Alessia drives the both of you, and you arrive into the locker room with a big smile on your face. “I’m assuming this means telling Russo about the messages ended up going well.” Katie says as you take your place next to her. “You could say that yes. I might have told her that I love her and she might’ve said it back.” She pats your back, “Aw, I’m so happy for you.” Everyone gets ready for the match, and lines up in the tunnel. Alanna was standing next to you in the tunnel and gave you a quick side hug before you entered the field. Like you said earlier, it would be nice to see some of your former teammates again.
While shaking hands with the opposing team you so badly wanted to skip Jenny, but you knew you had to show your sportsmanship. So, you shook her hand anyways, looking to Leah standing in front of you instead of to Jenny. You move on to the next person quickly, not wanting to linger. Kerstin sends you a knowing smile and pats your back after the two of you exchange a handshake.
After the team huddle you make your way to your spot on the field with Manu, Katie, Leah, and Lotte. The referee blew the whistle and the match started. You put your full focus on the match, knowing you were going to need it as Jenny and Chloe kept pressing forward. Manchester City was putting their pressure high, so your defense pushed back hard. Chloe earned her team a corner kick, and your team positions themselves for the corner. You feel a slight push to your back, not uncommon of course, until you hear the voice that belongs to the person pushing you. “Didn’t respond to my messages, sweetheart.” You ignore her and keep your eyes focussed on the people around you in the box. The corner gets taken and the ball comes flying your way, before you can respond Jenny speaks up again, “You’re going to flop today.” You freeze in place, her words getting to you. Jenny takes the opportunity to move around you and head the ball in the direction of the goal, luckily Manu was able to grab the ball out of the air. Katie runs up to you, “Don’t let Jones get into your head, okay? You’ve got this. You’re better than she is.” She pats your back before running to her position.
Katie and Leah took you aside during half time, they reassured you, knowing how Jenny was playing tricks with you. You took their words with you into the second half. Alessia managed to put Arsenal in the lead with a goal in the fifty eight minute, which only made your opponents push back harder. They earn another corner kick, and you get ready in the box once again. This time being prepared on who would come standing behind you, and entirely blocking out the words that were spoken to you. If it’s not about football, it’s not important. Leah had said, the words keps playing in your head. This time the ball didn’t reach the far post, so it was Lotte who headed the ball away from the goal. Though, Katie’s blood was boiling after she heard what Jenny said to her. She wasn’t holding back on her tackles and shoves, almost earning herself a yellow card a couple of times. You were grateful for your best friend having your back, but you also were not wanting her to get sent off the field by her actions.
There were only two minutes left of the match, your team had been playing high up on the field when the ball got intercepted by Kerstin who quickly played the ball to Jill. You are standing a little below the midfield line when Jill sends a long ball over your head. You spot Jenny making a run for it and quickly turn on your feet to run after it. Manu was already back in her goal, but besides her you were the only defender this low on the field. Jenny reaches the ball first, but you are close behind her. You divert slightly to the left so you can flank her. She is a step ahead of you, so there was only one way you’d be able to stop her attack and that was by a sliding tackle. The timing had to be perfect, you needed to prove Jenny wrong, needed to prove that you earned this spot on the team. You slide down, and time seems to slow down as your foot nears the ball.
The crowd at the Emirate erupts in cheer as you perfectly time your tackle and hit nothing but the ball. Jenny trips over your body, but no foul was given since it was a clean tackle. Katie, Leah and Lotte are the first one by your side, as they were trying to make the run back to aid you, the three of them running into a hug as the final whistle blew. The rest of the girls joined in on the group hug just moments later.
To celebrate the win, the team went out for some drinks. Nothing too crazy because you had training again tomorrow, since you’d have another game in a couple of days. The group of you just wanted to spend some time together outside of football. You were enjoying your evening, talking with your teammates and sipping on your drink. Alessia’s arm was draped around your shoulders and you were leaning into her side. The happiness you felt in your girlfriend's arms, with your friends surrounding you, was something you weren’t used to. You were excited to start getting used to it though.
You hadn’t even noticed that some of the City girls were in the same bar until a very drunk Jenny was standing in front of you. “You shouldn’t go out with her.” She said, slurring her words, and pointing to Alessia. Alessia who protectively held you closer to her body. “We should get back together, make it work this time.” You shake your head in disbelief, “Jenny, go home, you’re drunk.” Jenny doesn’t listen, and instead only takes another step towards you. “I want you back, y/n. Doesn’t matter if I’m drunk or not.” You give a quick squeeze to your hand that was intertwined with Alessia’s before getting up. “Look, Jenny, it is never going to happen. You never treated me right, and I should’ve left a lot sooner than I did, because I have found someone that treats me so well. There is no way that I would ever get back with you, please just leave.”
It seems like Jenny isn’t even listening to a word you said. “Come on, we’ve had some good times together.” Alessia heard enough, and got up to stand by your side. Her hand resting on your lower back, showing that she is there for you. “Jenny, she asked you to leave.” Your girlfriend said sternly. Jenny moved forward again, this time Katie stepped in between the both of you, her hand on Jenny’s shoulder keeping her back. “Look, mate, she is never getting back together with you, because you treated her like shit. So, my advice would be to leave before you embarrass yourself more than you already have.” Alanna and Kerstin heard the commotion and made their way over. “JJ, come on.” Kerstin said, pulling her away from you. “Let’s get you home alright?” Alanna stays for a moment, to check on you. “I’m okay, Lani, thank you.” She gives you a quick hug before she goes and helps Kerstin get Jenny home.
Both Katie and Alessia sit back down, both checking in on you as well. You lean into Alessia’s side again for comfort. “I am okay, really.” You reassure them. “I do think that I want to go home though.” Katie is already on her phone ordering an uber. “I got you.” You walk outside with Alessia’s hand in yours, along with Katie and Caitlin. “Want to stay over tonight? Caitlin is coming to mine too.” You nod, “Can Less come too?” Katie smiles, “Of course, she can.” You look over to Alessia, realizing you should also ask if that’s something that she wanted. Alessia simply nodded and gave your hand a reassuring squeeze.
When you arrive at Katie’s home, you turn to Katie right away. “Do you mind if we head straight to bed? I'm exhausted.” She brings you in for a quick hug, “Of course, whatever you need.” You give Caitlin a quick hug as well, before you take Alessia's hand. You stop before you leave the room, “Thank you for today.” You say looking between the girls. “No worries, we've got your back, always.” And with that you guide Alessia to the guest bedroom, you had some stuff laying around since you stayed over at least once a week, per your game day ritual.
“How are you feeling?” Alessia asks as she lays down on her side next to you, her head propped up on her arm. “Exhausted but okay, I know I have my people, including you.” She reaches out her free hand to put a falled strand of hair behind your ear. “I hope you know that I would never treat you that way.” You nod, “I know, you've been pretty amazing, actually.” You lean in and kiss her lips, the kiss is sweet and more passionate than the few kisses you have shared before. “Hm, I really am exhausted, Less. Can we continue this later?” Alessia leans her forehead against yours and smiles, “I would love to.” She lays down on her back and opens her arms for you to cuddle into her. You lay your head down on her chest, and she instantly wraps her arms around you. “Goodnight baby, I love you.” Her words make you smile, you could get used to falling asleep like this. “I love you too, darling. Sweet dreams.”
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#alessia russo#alessia russo x reader#alessia russo imagine#katie mccabe#katie mccabe x reader#katie mccabe imagine#arsenal wfc x reader#arsenal wfc imagine#arsenal wfc#arsenal women#woso x reader#woso imagine#woso fanfics#woso
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the one that (almost) got away
roronoa zoro x fem!reader
it takes him 12 hours to realize
3.6k words
a/n: ok listen, i think i started writing this like 6+ months ago and it’s just been sitting in my drafts bc idk how to commit to endings so y’all are gonna have to take this as it is. also i have no concept of how sailing works or how long it takes oops
9:00 pm
“y'know, there's really no point to a farewell party if the one leaving isn't there.”
you look up from your spot on the library floor. your eyes land on the green-haired swordsman leaning against the doorframe and you smile.
“i’ll be there in a second. i just have some more stuff to go through.”
zoro eyes the mess of books surrounding you, recognizing a few of nami’s atlases and robin’s textbooks. “you haven’t finished packing yet?”
“i’m mostly done. i’m just trying to decide which books i want to keep.” catching his eye, you joke, “why? you want me gone that bad?”
crossing the room, a scoff leaves his lips. nothing could be further from the truth.
“you got me. i am so sick of you,” he says with a grin. “can’t wait to get rid of the annoying librarian invading my napping spot.”
zoro plops down on the bench behind you, catching a whiff of your shampoo as he lies down. you sit with your back to him, sorting through your piles, but zoro can hear the smile in your voice when you speak.
“you’re such a pretender, eh?”
zoro puts on a look of overdramatic offense, a hand on his chest. “me? you’re talking about me?”
at his poor acting, you turn around. you rest your chin on the bench, your face so close to zoro’s that one could only describe it as a kissable distance.
“you act like i'm all in your space, but nami told me that you never used to spend any time in here at all!”
“pfft, why would you ever trust what that con artist has to say?” zoro pokes your forehead. “you see it with your own eyes. am i or am i not here every day?”
you purse your lips as you think back to the last few months; he’s right.
you’ve spent most of your days in the ship’s library, and zoro has almost always stopped by. in the beginning, it would be for a few minutes, but over the last little while, he’d be in here as long as you were.
zoro smiles as he watches you think, eyebrows furrowed as you replay the last few months in your head. little do you know that this is exactly why the library is his new hideout. watching your pretty little mind work — doing what you love, thinking and studying and reading — is a far better use of his spare time than anything else he could be doing.
“anyway,” he says. “i guess your silly star stories have been a good trade-off.”
now it’s your turn to be mock-offended.
“silly star stories? you’re the one who asked about the constellations in the first place!”
“only because you kept talking about these fictional gods like they actually did something important.”
“says the guy who's completely enthralled by hades,” you roll your eyes.
“king of hell, god of the underworld,” he grins. “that’s my kinda guy.”
zoro laughs when you shake your head at him. he’ll never tire of teasing you; you are far too adorable with your little sigh and a ghost of a smile on your lips.
“did you know,” he says with a playful look. “that you still owe me about ten more constellation stories? d’you think you could squeeze in one more before we head up?”
zoro smiles at you, and you can't help but smile back.
you have so many treasured memories with zoro in this library; ones of just the two of you (him napping while you studied), ones with nami and robin (and sanji until nami kicked the boys out for their incessant bickering), and ones where the night listens in as you recite the history of the stars.
whether you were telling the story of another righteous deity enacting justice, or the tale of mere mortals who insulted the gods, zoro would listen with his eyes closed, lying across the bench as he is now, and you’d sit in front of him as you are now.
everyone’s waiting for you upstairs and you hate to disappoint, but some things are more important — like telling a silly star story to a silly swordsman.
“of course i can.”
12:00 am
raucous laughter and cheering that’s loud enough to deafen anybody; empty plates, once piled high with food, now scattered around the room; bottles on bottles of sake and rum and whiskey and every liqueur that one would hope to find on a pirate ship.
these are zoro’s requirements for a good time, and suffice to say that your farewell party has them all in spades.
zoro watches his friends’ tomfoolery from his spot at the table (currently, luffy’s trying to get franky to see how far he can slingshot him) when you plop yourself into the seat beside him.
“this,” you say as your arm knocks against his, “is the best party i’ve ever been to.”
zoro takes a swig from his glass, “you haven’t partied until you’ve partied with pirates.”
“seriously! you guys are insane!”
as if to prove your point, franky chooses that exact moment to show off a juggling sequence involving a barrel of whiskey, a giant potted plant, and a squealing chopper.
you gasp at the spectacle but quickly dissolve into laughter when nami saves chopper, and it’s with both awe and pure excitement that you turn to zoro. laughter is etched into your lips, your cheeks are flushed, and zoro can’t help but marvel at how you’re even cuter when you’re having fun.
“what, you’ve never seen a cyborg man toss a speaking reindeer in the air before?”
you nudge him with your elbow, “well, excuse me for leading such a mundane life where animals don’t speak and men don’t tinker with their bodies.”
“ah, but that’s where you’re wrong.”
you look at zoro quizically.
he takes a sip of his beer, “most men do tinker with their bodies.”
it takes you a moment to catch his innuendo and zoro roars with laughter when the realization hits you. embarrassment tinges your pretty face and you shove him with a loud “ew, zoro!” but he can’t stop cackling.
“you’re disgusting!”
you make to swat zoro across the chest but he quickly catches your hand. he leans in to waggle his eyebrows at you, “but i’m not wrong, am i?”
you groan loudly, which only makes him laugh again.
perhaps it’s the alcohol that let his inhibitions go, or maybe it’s the fact that he doesn’t have much longer with you, but when you hastily change the subject and there’s no longer a reason for him to still be holding your hand, he doesn’t let go.
when nami joins you two, his fingers slips between yours and to his surprise, yours do the same. sanji joins your threesome, then franky and robin, and in no time at all, it’s no longer just the two of you at the table.
but zoro doesn’t care.
drunk, carefree, and more content than he’s ever been, zoro closes his eyes and smiles. he lives in the moment, and in this moment, he’s happy — happy with a full stomach and a full glass, happy to be surrounded by his favourite people, and happy that, under the table, you’re still holding his hand.
3:00 am
“and what’s that one?”
hands swinging between you, you and zoro dodge the tide as you roam further and further from the thousand sunny. the sand is cool under your feet and the tide kisses your toes with each step. your other arm is stretched above you, pointing at a constellation in the distance.
“what is this - a pop quiz?”
you smile, “i want to make sure you don’t forget about my ‘silly star stories.’”
zoro groans, “has anyone told you that holding grudges isn’t healthy? keeping going and you’ll turn into a bitter old thing some day.”
you stick out your tongue, “you’re just afraid you’ll get it wrong.”
“wrong?” zoro scoffs. “i’ve gotten the past six right.”
walking along the beach, you and zoro fall in step with each other and your footsteps match the ebbing waves in perfect rhythm. you smile in his direction and his chest is flooded with a warmth that has nothing to do with the copious amounts of alcohol he’s consumed.
“alright, let’s see what we got here.”
zoro follows your gaze at the cluster of stars you’ve chosen, and he grins when he sees the constellation. “really? at least try to make this hard for me, please.”
his cocky attitude leaves you speechless, making zoro laugh.
“you’re so annoying!” you shove him with your free hand and the force of his stumble pulls you along, and you shriek as he drags you into the ocean with him. he doesn’t let go of you, not even for a second — not when water splashes your legs, not when zoro’s pants get soaked as he spins you around.
your laughter is warmth in its purest form, the kind that you can feel all the way down to your cold toes. when he sets you back down, you give his hand a little squeeze, to which zoro answers back with a tender smile.
now with wet feet and a distance between you that’s even smaller than it already was, zoro continues to walk alongside you.
“moving on from your pathetic distraction attempt,” — you let out a dramatic gasp — “i’ll tell you exactly who we were looking at.”
pointing at the starry zodiac sign, zoro speaks with complete confidence.
“virgo the maiden, otherwise known as persephone, wife and muse of the best god of them all, hades—”
“fanboy much?” you tease but zoro pretends not to hear you (the little tug of his lips tells you that he does).
“—who snuck her a pomegranate seed because he couldn’t bear for her to leave him.”
zoro puffs his chest with pride, relishing in this one niche study of which he is now an expert. it’s incredibly endearing how pleased he is with his answer and you almost feel bad for correcting him.
almost.
“good answer,” you grin. “but you left out the little detail about how she was kept in hell against her will.”
zoro gasps, “are you accusing my idol of being a kidnapper?”
“your idol!” your cheeks already hurt so much from smiling but another giggle slips out. “first of all, these aren’t my accusations. historians have told their love story this way for years—”
“slander is what this is.”
“—and secondly, why would you want to look up to hades? he’s literally the antagonist in every story.”
“he’s the king of hell! that’s so bad ass.” zoro winks at you, “don’t be surprised if you hear them calling me ‘zoro, king of hell’ some day.”
“what’s wrong, demon of east blue doesn’t go hard enough for you?”
embarrassment rushes to zoro’s face and he’s never been more grateful for the night. “who told you that? was it usopp or nami? i bet it was nami.”
“i might hold a grudge but i don’t snitch,” you flash a mischievous smile. “anyway, let’s get back to how you want to be just like devil who tricked a poor girl in returning to the underworld.”
“come on, can you blame a man for doing whatever it takes to stop his beloved from leaving him?”
it sounds like an innocent question — harmless banter, really — but something in the way he says it makes you stop dead in your tracks. a silence falls and in its wake, all you can do is stare at the man you’ve spent the last several months with, the same man that you have to say goodbye to tomorrow.
moonlight falls unto the both of you and bathes zoro in soft light. it illuminates his eyes and when you meet his gaze, you see a sense of longing there that you feel in your chest. a longing for what, you don’t know — or rather, you don’t want to know.
at least, not yet.
so you hold his hand a little tighter, and underneath the watchful eye of the gods and constellations, muster a smile,
“i guess not.”
6:00 am
if this was any other morning, zoro would be awake and working out already. he'd be done his fourth set of bicep curls or, at the very least, working on his form. he could even be in the middle of deadlifts (because he knows not to skip leg day), but he definitely wouldn't still be in bed the way that he is right now.
the thing is though, if this was any other morning, he wouldn't have you sleeping next to him, curled into him like you were made to be a perfect fit.
he's never been more glad to still be in bed.
your breath matches the rise and fall of zoro's chest, perfectly in rhythm with the waves outside his window and the beat of his heart, like the universe meant for all these things to be in harmony at this one singular moment in time.
your lashes flutter in response when he shifts his weight.
he takes a peek at you, “psst, are you awake?”
eyes still closed, you manage a noncommittal grunt but your body says otherwise.
zoro can’t help but smile as he watches you start to wake up. your toes wiggle beneath the covers and you rub your eyes before looking up at him with an adorably sleepy look that he would love to wake up to every day.
if only he could.
you focus your gaze on zoro like he’s an anchor in a sea of slumber. the way that you look at him, as if he’s the only thing that you see, fills his chest with a golden warmth akin to the breaking dawn.
you offer him a soft smile, and zoro wonders if the sun knows that you glow brighter than it ever could.
“why are you up at this ungodly hour?”
he chuckles, low and tender, “’m used to it. i’m usually up by now.”
“freak,” you mutter. zoro laughs, and you can’t think of anything else that sounds more beautiful at six in the morning.
you’re not usually up this early but what you notice is that, at dawn, time has a habit of moving slowly. it’s as if the morning casts magic upon those who rise with the daylight — and you’re so thankful for that.
because if time moved any faster than this, you’d have to say goodbye that much sooner.
“are you going to miss us?” zoro puts his arms around you.
you murmur into his chest, “of course, i will.”
“who do you think you’ll miss the most?”
you give pause and zoro’s almost certain you can hear his heart beating a little louder — he can definitely hear it. he doesn’t typically get nervous like this but, then again, nothing about the way you make him feel is typical.
you seem to have come to a conclusion because you look up at zoro and he holds his breath.
“sanji.”
he blinks.
“wait, are you serious?”
you’ve never seen zoro looks so wonderfully scandalized before, and you burst into a fit of giggles. as soon as you start, he knows he’s been had. he scowls but only for a moment; for who could be upset in the presence of such twinkling laughter?
“silly man,” you snuggle closer, "of course i’m not serious.”
“okay, good.” you can hear the smile in his voice. “i don’t know if my ego could handle losing to him.”
zoro holds you close, his thumb tracing circles on your skin. his movements are slow, steady, comforting — ‘round and ‘round, in the same spot, like he’s drawing an invisible mark that is only known to the two of you.
"but, you know,” you hum, careful not to disrupt the peace. “you wouldn’t.”
“wouldn’t what?”
“lose.” and after a beat, you quietly add, “you wouldn’t lose to anyone.”
and just like that, zoro’s on cloud nine, airborne and weightless. he’s always known that he has a place in your heart, but this is the first time that you’ve ever hinted about where that place may be. if he allowed himself to be hopeful, it almost sounds like a confession.
but almost isn’t good enough for him. zoro wants more — wants to find out exactly where he belongs in your life, wants to know if he can make himself at home there.
it’s a shame that he’s out of time.
you interrupt his thoughts with a whisper, barely audible above the sound of the ocean and his aching heart,
“will you miss me?”
more than anything.
9:00 am
surely, zoro’s dream to be hades has been granted. otherwise, why would it feel like he’s in hell, standing on the deck, all alone and watching your dinghy sail away from the thousand sunny?
zoro’s had his fair shares of farewells while aboard the ship, and to be honest, yours wasn’t any more emotional than anyone else’s. you left with a smile as beautiful as the morning sun and with far less tears than he expected (which he’s thankful for because he would hate to see you cry). as far as bittersweet goodbyes go, yours was definitely more sweet than bitter.
and yet, here zoro stands, with a bad taste in his mouth that he can’t explain. he can still see you from where he stands, and watching your little boat in the distance is the only thing that seems to settle his uneasy heart.
should he have bid adieu privately? maybe he should’ve left you with a memento of some kind? should he have done more than offer you a quick hug? was it his imagination, or did you hold onto him just a beat longer than you needed to?
zoro’s so occupied by these messy thoughts that he doesn’t even hear sanji approach him.
“well?”
startled, zoro can only stare at the blond cook. ignoring the dumb look on his face, sanji continues.
“what’d she say when you told her?” sanji nods in the direction of your boat.
“told her what?”
“that you love her,” sanji takes a drag of his cigarette, looking at zoro directly now.
he speaks so frankly, so matter-of-fact and candidly, that it takes zoro a second to really register what it is that he’s saying.
he loves you.
and as soon as he thinks it, the truth comes barreling through all the doubts clouding his head. clarity floods his chest as he comes face-to-face with what his yearning, pining heart has been trying to tell him this whole time.
he loves you. he loves you. he loves you. he loves you. he loves you-
fuck.
he loves you.
and he never told you.
epilogue — 9:30 am
sails closed, your boat floats with the current and the salty breeze reminds you that your adventure with the strawhats has come to a close. compared to the never-ending bustle of the crew, it’s almost too quiet being at sea alone. the silence lends itself to your overactive mind, working full time to unravel the tightness you feel in your chest.
you’re lost in thoughts of what could’ve, should’ve, and would’ve been — so much so that you don’t even hear the commotion behind you. it’s not until you hear zoro call your name that you hear the frantic swimming and you whirl around.
“zoro! what-”
“can you help me first?” he splutters.
you pull yourself together long enough to run to the side of your dinghy, pulling a sopping wet pirate on board. zoro leans back, trying to catch his breath as you rummage through your things.
“are you crazy? do you know how far we are from the sunny?” you throw a towel over him before reaching for another. you start drying off his hair, frantically fussing over him.
“you think that just because chopper gives you the clearance that you can push yourself over the limit-”
“y/n.”
“this is why you’re always on house arrest! you’re actually insane, you know that?”
“y/n.”
“i know you work out, but for goodness’ sake, zoro, you’re only human-”
“y/n.” zoro holds your wrists, forcing you to stop with a start.
in all your worrying, you didn’t realize that you’d been gravitating closer to zoro until you’re staring into his dark, obsidian eyes. there’s clarity in the way that he looks at you. his eyes are shining with a fierceness that you’ve only seen in his worst fights, and you brace yourself for whatever comes next.
because you know that this will change everything.
“hades and persephone.”
“huh?“ you blink at him. “did you hit your head-”
“ask me if i think hades loved persephone.”
you stare into zoro’s eyes, desperation reflecting back at you. there’s a hidden question there and you understand immediately.
quietly, you ask, "do you think hades loved persephone?”
“i do,” he whispers. “i think he loved her and he would've been stupid to let her go.”
your breath catches. zoro places a hand over yours, surprisingly warm as his fingers find their home between your own.
the heavens watch on as the two of you finally open your hearts and give way to the stuff that myths and legends yearn for — a connection that can only be described as fated, destined, purely and resplendently magical.
the gods smile at the two lovers who find themselves falling into each other, laughing as you confess, over and over again,
i love you.
#zoro x reader#roronoa zoro x reader#roronoa zoro fluff#zoro fluff#one piece x reader#₊ ˚ ʚ writing ! ɞ#i know i just wrote a zoro fic BUT#this fic has been stuck in my drafts for too mf long#i didn't even proofread the epilogue bc fuck it#i just need her to go out into the world ok#i promise i will write non-zoro stuff soon#(maybe)#(jk i will)
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