#{she just doesnt know what a dab is or that shes dabbing she just does it}

[merlucide]

PLEASEEEEE CAN YOU WRITE HEADCANONS WITH RIN, KAISER, SAE, OTOYA AND REO AND A SHYREADER WHOS SHY AROUND PEOPLE SHE DOESNT KNOW BUT CRAZZYYYY AROUND PEOPLE SHE DOES KNOW PLSSSSS

BLLK BOYS WITH A SHY BUT CRAZY S/O

Notes: OFC WIFEY. Also… this scenario, seems, a bit self insert don’t you think…. 👀 ALSO LMAO I MADE READER UNHINGED?? SO- SORRY LMAO?

characters: Rin, Sae, Kaiser, Otoya, Reo

wc: about 300ish each

warnings: nb reader, cursing, randomness + cringe lmao😭

ITOSHI RIN

Well tbh, y’all probably had to have been friends for a loooong time for him to ever considering dating you 😭😭

So Rin had a good understanding of your personality, as you had known each other pretty much since the beginning of time.

He never understood how your personality went from 0 to 1000 whenever you two are alone. 

He prob thinks ur on drugs tbh

He’ll be your voice for you if you can’t seem to communicate with strangers, though he might not be the friendliest no shit.

he thinks it’s dumb that you’re shy tbh

He’s small minded about these things okay 😭

He never ever will get used to your bursts of crazy energy.

he swears he’ll turn around and you’ll have a horse mask on with a tutu around your waist

ITOSHI SAE

lmao you give him terrible whiplash.

He too, also thinks you’re on drugs.

You and Sae would like be at the airport on the way to Japan, his manager would be going over the details and precautions for going to Japan (yk fans and press or whatever etc etc).

His manager looked over to you and asked if you were alright, since you literally hadn’t spoken a word since he introduced himself a two hours ago. 

You nodded and followed Sae and his manager onto the private jet(cus he’s rich-rich😌🤭)

Once y’all were settled, his manager closed you and Sae’s cabin door. 

Sae looked over to see if you were alright, since traveling and yadda yadda can be overwhelming.

You were fucking giggling like an underwater hyena (that’s a thing I bc I fucking said so bitch).

You grabbed his hands and pulled back and forth giggling about how stoked you were rn.

LMAO HE WAS TOTALLY LOOKING AT U LIKE THIS

KAISER MICHEAL

lmao he was disturbed at first 💀

like “wtf happens to my shy, sweet, s/o??”

He’ll like be getting a glass of water at night and in the corner of his eye, you hold a flashlight at your face with a blanket wrapped around you. Staring into his soul, inches behind singing.

“hello darkness my old frienddd~”

He just blinked at you for a while. 

“Y/N what the fuck is wrong with you.”

ANYWHOOO!

He thinks it’s funny af though

Like how nervous you get around his teammates and then when y’all are home you start cartwheeling.

You sure keep his life ✨spontaneous✨

OTOYA EITA

LMAO A MATCH MADE IN HEAVEN

YOUR RANDOM AF.

HES RANDOM AF.

= SOULMATES

he thinks it’s so cute how shy you are

He loves that bc ur shy around strangers you cling/stay close to him. He feels so sigma male bc he’s ’protecting’ you🐺🐺🔊🔊🗣️🗣️😏😏

Someone humble him please.

LMAO HE’LL GO LIKE:

“Babe watch this😏” and ninja pose really fast LIKE A LITTLE KID DABBING

And you’ll be like:

“Nah watch this😌” *does the worm*

Y’all T-pose at pidgend together 💕 #couplegoals

MIKAGE REO

LMAO HE’LL BE DAYDREAMING AND LIKE-

“My dearest Y/N! Oh they’re such an angel! They’re so pretty and kind and perfect! And amazing- is that them in a dinosaur inflatable doing the WAP in 6 inch heels?”

lmao kinda how it goes

He never really gets used to the switch up.

It makes him so happy that you feel comfortable to be yourself around him, even if that means painting yourself pink and putting googly-eyes on while blasting the Peppa Pig intro💗

He loves hearing people talk about you too.

“Oh y/n is really shy, but they’re nice I guess?” Like hah okay..

Pretty sure they weren’t crab walking in a tuxedo with a kazoo in their mouth playing Sinfonia N°9 Coral in D Minor, Op. 125: 1. Allegro ma non troppo, un poco maestoso by Beethoven 🙄🙄

LMAO I HAD NO IDEA WERE I WAS GOING WITH THIS. I WAS LIKE “wtf am I gonna do😦”

made April 21st 2024

[yourtouchismidas]

Blurb idea Matty is sick in bed and Gigi is helping him and bringing him food/supplies. Maybe it’s unlike her because she’s usually playfully bullying him and she does by saying he looks bad and his hair looks shit but the sentiment is there and she’s being really sweet by helping him get better <3

maybe its a saturday and you and the other girls are out, at various classes and birthday parties, and gigi was supposed to come but she didnt want to. she begged you to stay home.

"daddy isn't very well," you say to her.

"he's literally tweeting," gigi says, holding up her phone to show you the notification.

"okay so he is on the mend," you laugh, "but you've got to be extra well behaved if i leave you here with him okay?"

"i'm always well behaved," she grins.

"not when it comes to your father you're not," you say, "but okay. ring me if he gets worse okay or if you need anything. and dont be a menace to him. i know he is tweeting but he still had a temperature this morning. promise?"

"promise," she says.

"matty," you yell through, while shoving a coat round valley's shoulders, "matt? i'm leaving gigi with you."

"great!" matty says, "gi get in here."

you look at gigi, who isnt moving.

"you promised," you say and she slopes off to his room.

matty is lying in bed propped up by pillows, his phone in his hand and tissues all around him.

"gigi baby can you get me some water," he says.

"you sound fine," she says.

"i'm not though. i'm poorly. help me dear sweet daughter. help your father"

"for fucks sake," gigi says, and leaves.

"language," he tries to yell after her, but his voice cracks and he groans and sticks his head under the pillow. to his surprise, gigi returns with a too full glass of water, in a babies sippy cup with no lid.

"this was all we had clean," she says, balancing it carefully as she walks across the carpet.

"i told your mum that im the one who does all the pots and this just proves it. i'm out for two days and it all goes to shit."

"i mean she is out ferrying around your horrendous amount of children," gigi says, sitting down on the bed. he kicks out at her and then slurps his water while gigi says "ewww" and tries to grab his bare foot under the covers.

"how do i look gi?" matty says.

"you look like shit, matthew," she says.

"should've seen that coming."

"i'm gonna go play drums," she says.

"gigi, honey, it's a bit too loud. can you pick a quieter activity? i'm going to try and take a nap."

"i'll play the electric ones," she says. "by the way, tweeting isn't the way to feel better."

she leaves the room again and he throws a pillow at her.

he wakes up an hour or so later. when he opens his eyes, they're blurry, but his daughter comes in to focus, watching him. she sees him open his eyes and jumps up.

"i came to ask if i can have a pack of crisps," she says.

"whatever," he says, and rolls over and falls back asleep.

another hour or so later, he feels something. something cool and refreshing on his head. something damp. he opens his eyes a tiny bit, not noticeably, and there is gigi, sitting on the edge of the bed again, dabbing his forehead with a wet flannel. he closes his eyes. tries not to smile. so she doesnt notice he's woken up. so she doesnt leave again. he drifts back off to sleep. next time he wakes up, it's her, footsteps on the carpet, and the door closing behind her, bringing him a cup of tea.

"it's lemon and honey," she says, placing it down on the side.

"were you..."

"i was careful with the kettle," she sighs. he smiles.

"thanks baby," he says.

"your hair looks shit," she says, and disappears again.

"thanks baby," he says. he gets out his phone. poorly and my daughter just said my hair looks shit. what a little gobshite

"stop tweeting!" gigi yells from the other room. matty laughs. he feels much better.

[stonedpiece]

What are the smoking habits of the Straw Hats in your opinion

now we're asking the real questions. i think they all dabble with the devil fruit's lettuce to some degree

luffy: will smoke with usopp, but sanji hates it cause he gets the munchies which for luffy you know would be insane

usopp: massive fucking stoner, always has a joint lit and is just trying to vibe. he gets paranoid really quickly, but if he is vibing he just tells the best stories ever. great person to have in your smoke circle

sanji: smokes blunts but still holds them like cigarettes. he usually does it at the end of the day when he can unwind. always tries to outsmoke zoro but can't

zoro: he is an alcohol guy first and foremost, but he will not look like a wimp in any smoke circle, especially if sanji's there. he'll smoke until people stop rolling or packing bowls then he just takes a nap afterwards. he can do massive bong rips and dab hits because he doesnt have baby lungs. i think zoro will mainly smoke with luffy, usopp, and robin

robin: massive stoner too, she is more of an edible gal though, but still smokes joints and is probably one of the best on the crew to roll them. she will smoke a joint under the sun while she reads a book. she also doesnt have baby lungs and will take massive bong rips or dab hits with zoro and franky.

franky: he is his own dab rig. always has some fancy concetrate ready to smoke. his little hand has the needle to apply oil. he likes to get high and work on the sunny

chopper: tries to stick to medical reasons only when he smokes, but he cant fall for the lure of being a cool stoner like usopp, robin, or zoro. he'll try to keep up but he always coughs his little lungs out. zoro and robin murder anyone who laughs at him though. when he gets high he gets very existential due to being a human and reindeer

brook: just look at him. dude is high as hell all he time, he is always smoking a joint or hitting the bong with zoro. his stash is in his skull. when he was alone for 50 years the thing he missed the most after his friends and crew was weed

jinbe: i think he smoked occasionally when he was young, but when he became a soldier he stopped and became really serious. he didnt smoke again until he joined luffys crew and they offered him some cause he needed to relax. now he is a social smoker, but since someone is always smoking on the ship then he is always smoking too

nami: she is a massive stoner but tries to hide it. she'll usually smoke when she locks herself away to work on the maps so she can at least not be stressed out. usopp and robin supply the weed to her.

[antisocialgaycat]

feel free to ignore im kind of just screaming into the void here

so i love my friends right like theyre great people however there are some things that they do that kind of make me dislike them and i feel so bad abt it cos i love them but some of the shit they do makes me so uncomfy and i dont want to say anything cos what if they hate me for it and want to stop being friends with me and even though i know that they wont it still scares me lol but some of the shit they do makes me so uncomfy like some of them are hella transphobic and dont even realise it hell some of them say homophobic shit like in a joking way but it still kinda scares me also one of them uses autistic as an insult and that absolutely does not sit right with me and like this one isnt even that bad but they constantly refer to me as the gay one and they dont even seem to think of me as more than that sometimes also i have asked them a hundred times to call me lesbian instead of gay but nope im the gay one in the friend group and nothing will change that and that kind of doesnt vibe with me too good also theres this person who they keep referring to as my girlfriend or my wife and that absolutely is not okay with me and if asked them to stop so many times but they either cant or wont cos they keep calling her that and the thing is that the person they keep calling my wife is a really good friend of mine and we also have a lot of friends in common and i hang out w her and her friends a lot and whenever my friends see me with her they always take photos and shit which makes me so uncomfy i hate having photos taken of me and theyre also really unsubtle about calling her my girlfriend and shit when shes around and when her friends around and im so scared that either her or one of her friends will figure out that i like her and she'll be like ew thats mank and ill lose yet another friend and even tho i know thats so so unlikely cos shes a great person but it would at the very least make things awkward between us and i dont want that cos shes a good friend (better than my fg) so if my friends mess up that friendship i swear im gonna have no friends at all cos ill likely get pissed as fuck at them and my other friends will think im mentally fucked up and then i may as well just leave the entire fucking school and go to my local one and even though i know im catastrophising to the end of the earth and back it still doesnt take away from the fact that some of my friends are making me feel so uncomfy that i dont want to hang out w them even tho i love them also theres these two really toxic people in my grade who sometimes hang out with us (one more than the other) and theyve told the one whos not nice per se but less bad than the other one and hangs out with us less to fuck off and the homophobic transphobic bitch who uses so many slurs its not ok at all they seem to have no problem with oh and theres this kid in the year below us who always dabs up the rest of my fg but whenever he sees me he just says ew no ur a lesbian and one time he said that i prolly jerk off to furry porn and first of all what the actual fuck second of all that made me feel so uncomfy and third of all my fg just laughed and they still bring it up so often and they surely can tell it makes me feel so so fucking scared and i dont even fucking know why oh and one of my closest friends has the most terrible taste in guys like i swear she lies the most toxic people and im the only one who can actually see that cos all the others think theyre hot and they dont realise just how bad its gonna end every time theres literally only 2 people in that group who actually dont ever make me feel like my skeleton js gonna fucking scuttle out of my skin and crab walk to the nearest trash can and jump in so tysm to sarah (i aint gonna tag u cos i dont want u to see this post lmao im still gonna post it tho) and arkie (she doesnt even have tumblr and will never see this post but i still want to put it in writing) anyways yuh thats my lil vent

[rubyheist]

"Mom... I'm sure you understand memes. Do you dab or t-pose? Totally asking for a friend."

          Scarlet stared. She tried to understand memes, she really did, but it seemed like every day there was something new and odd. How do the kids keep up with all of this?

          “…I don’t know what either of those mean.”

[littleavengerfics]

Hey, can you do a Wanda nat x little reader where Natasha and Wanda are arguing because Nat keeps coming home from missions injured and Wanda is tired of seeing Natasha hurt. So maybe she breaks up with Nat to protect herself and y/n. But Nat doesnt want to leave y/n or quit her job. Then y/n hears them and gets upset then maybe blames Wanda.

Sorry this is long but can you do the prompts with Natasha saying it if possible.

"I will always be here to protect you."

"I've got you baby."

Thanks

It's not enough (WandaNat x little reader)

Warnings: break ups, separation, mentions injuries, arguing. Angst

"Hey babe, I'm back." Nat announced placing her keys down on the table, leaning on it with a sigh. She was exhausted, she had barely slept in weeks, just throwing herself into her work. It became so extreme that her body and her relationships were beginning to suffer.

"Hey." Wanda watched from the doorway as the russian straightened up and limped over to her. "Hi my love." Nat let out a hiss of pain before placing a kiss on her girlfriend's cheek. "Sit down, let me take a look." Wanda said firmly, visibly agitated by the woman's state. "You know I can fix myself up, I can take care of myself." Nat chuckled, however Wanda didn't find it funny.

"Clearly you can't, this is the third time this week you've come home like this." Wanda guided Natasha down to a seat before pulling the first aid kit closer. "I can't keep doing this Natasha."

"You don't have to, I told you I've got it covered."

"I mean it Nat. I can't do this anymore." Wanda whispered, her eyes filling with tears. Nat looked at her in disbelief. "What- What do you mean?"

Wanda took a shaky breath, dabbing the Russian's wound. "It's not fair on me and it's not fair on y/n. Youre hardly home anymore and when you are you're in bed curled up in pain. It hurts me Natasha." Nat's eyes began to water as she watched a single tear roll down her lovers cheek.

"It hurts me to not see you for days at a time. To tell y/n that their mama isn't coming home for dinner or bath time, that you wont be there to read a story or hold them when they have a nightmare. I have to break their heart everyday and hear them cry into their pillow knowing theres nothing I can do to bring you home."

"Babe, I love you, I love our family. I will take some time off, I will reduce my hours… I'll do anything please don't say it." Wanda stood up, turning away from the redhead. "I wanna break up. I can't deal with it anymore." Nat felt her heart break into a million pieces. "No no you don't mean that." Nat stood up taking Wandas hand from behind. "Give me a chance please. I will do whatever it takes." "I can't ask you to do it. That job means everything to you, I don't want you to gove that up for me but it's the only way I can carry on with us." Wanda said quietly, pulling away from the spy.

"Come on there must be another way we can work it out. I love you and y/n so much and you love us too. That has to mean something." Wanda nodded in agreement.

"It does, but its not enough. Loving you isn't enough to heal the pain i feel when I wonder if you are gonna come home. Or the pain in my stomach I get when the phone rings and I prepare myself to hear the worst news I could think of. It's not enough anymore."

Nat nodded slightly, the tears still falling off her face that she didn't even bother to wipe away. She didnt know if she'd ever experienced such emotional pain or if she had ever cried as hard as she did in that moment. "I'll go get my stuff." She said trying to hide her voice breaking in the middle but the sokovian still heard it and it made her stomach turn.

"No mama dont go." Both of them turned to see you clutching your stuffed animal under your arm.

"Hey baby." Nat dried her face before walking over to you. "Mama pease stuffies name doesn wan you to go."

"I know baby but it's gonna be okay, you still have mommy and… I am only a phone call away. So if any of you ever need me. I will always be here to protect you." She smiled looking between both you and Wanda.

You let out a sob, throwing yourself into the Russian's arms. "Mama." You cried into her neck as she held you tight, ignoring the pain in her side. "Mama's got you little one, I've got you baby."

Nat stayed hugging you for a while before pulling away, "I will see you soon, I promise. Mommy will look after you tonight but I will call you before bed for a bedtime story. How does that sound?" You looked at your mommy who was avoiding Natasha's eyes.

"Come on baby." Wanda swallowed,  taking your hand and pulling you towards her… and away from your mama

Nat grabbed her bags and blew you a kiss before leaving. "I love you dorogoy!" She smiled, peeking her head out from behind the door.

"It's going to be okay love." Wand asmiled down at you but you pulled your hand away. "Is not otay! You made her weave. Dis is all your faults!" You shouted before leaving, taking your stuffed animal with you.

Wanda flopped down onto the couch before sobbing into her hands. She allowed herself a few moments to feel before she straightened herself out and went to speak to you.

"Y/n can I come in?" Wanda asked knocking on the door twice. You didn't respond but the witch entered anyway. "You know we love you right? We always will no matter what me and your mama are going through, I promise it will be okay."

You felt a kiss land on your forehead before the sokovian retreated back to the living room.

You pulled the blankets up higher so they covered your face, you wanted to hide. Maybe if you wished hard enough when you lifted the blanket Wanda and Nat would be there smiling at you lovingly and this would turn out to be a bad dream. Maybe they could stay together.

Maybe it was enough.

[luveline]

could we have a drabble in which peter helps out a girlfriend who picks at her skin on her face to a point where it bleeds? like when she's nervous etc? and maybe she doesnt think he realises but he does and so he helps her cope with it, like putting little bandaids on oh my heart-

thank you and keep writing! i think you are amazeballs!

thank u and thank u for this request! so so lovely <3

You pull your hand away from your face and blink in momentary confusion at the blood under your fingernails. "Oh," you say quietly. "Fuck."

You're sitting on Peter's sofa. He's in the kitchen, rifling through drawers for a bottle opener. You pull your sleeve over your fingers and press it to your face. He might not notice, you hope, pulling your sleeve away to check. There's a small circle of blood there, nothing extreme. You dab again.

You're pushing your fingertip into the new dot spitefully as Peter comes up behind you. His fingers close around your wrist, pulling your hand down into your lap. He does the same with the other hand, leaning over the back of the couch and your shoulder to kiss your cheek.

"Guess what?" he asks quietly. He's tired tonight.

"What?" you ask, equally hushed.

He kisses your cheek again. His lips touch your face just barely as he talks. You can feel his smile. "My bottle opener's gone walkies."

He unfurls your fingers to work his own, longer and thicker, between them. He roves down to plant a lazy kiss under your jaw and his lips brush over your newest welt. It's late, the glass shade lamp on his coffee table painting your intertwined fingers a gauzy, glowing white-pink.

You try so hard not to pick your skin around him – to show any sign of anxiety – but you forgot yourself, worries welling to the surface. He never says anything about the little red pin prick marks on your face, never mentions the welts stretching over your arms from time to time or your sore, bitten fingertips, and you hope he won't start tonight, lest you die of embarrassment.

Your wince gives you away.

"What?" he asks, pulling back.

You ignore his question and turn your face from the pink light, facing him head on. You hope the dark hides the tiny bead of dried blood on your cheek, pulling his hands across your abdomen, basically forcing him to hug you. He makes no complaint.

"So no wine?"

"None," he agrees sagely. "Unless you can rip a cork out with your teeth?"

"You can't?" you tease.

He steals his hands back to stroke your cheek. His fingerpad skips over your welt, at first accidental, and then a second time, to your poorly contained horror.

"That's a bad one," he murmurs, tilting your head slowly and gently, eyes concerned.

It makes you feel like your heart is plummeting out of your body. "Is it?" you ask, mouth suddenly dry.

"Mm," is all he says.

He squeezes your shoulder and stands, disappearing as quick as he appeared. You sit in the low light and stare at your still warm hands, reeling at his simple statement. He knows.

It's like being stripped bare, sudden and vulnerable. You squirm in your seat and wonder after him. Where's he gone? Is he disgusted?

He returns swiftly and rounds the sofa to sit on his knees, taller than you. In his hands is a small cardboard box. He digs his fingertip into the lip of the box, room so quiet that the sound of cardboard scratching cardboard sounds as though it's happening right next to your ear.

He pries it open and sifts through its contents, pulling out a small, yellow bandaid. It's shaped like a star.

"I got these for you. I hope I haven't hurt your feelings," he says this part especially softly, hand on your wrist and eyes edged with apology. "I thought these might help, you know, stop you from scratching."

You can't think of anything to say. You look from one dark eye and then the other.

You nod.

A sigh of relief escapes him, so small you might have missed it if you didn't know him this well. It makes sense that he knows you to the same depth.

His fingers carefully peel open the bandaid. He pushes flyaway baby hairs from your face, touch tender as he places the star over your tiny cut.

"How long have you known?"

"Since I met you," he answers easily.

You feel like an idiot. "You never said anything."

"That wouldn't be very polite. And they make no difference to me. But they must hurt, right?"

You think maybe that's the point, although you'd never say that to him. "I didn't think you noticed."

His hand comes up to caress your newly starred face, wiping his thumb across the well under your eye. "Sweetheart."

"Right," you say bluntly, looking down at your thighs. An embarrassed giggle bubbles out of you. "How could you not?"

"I notice everything," he says, all Peter Parker charm, beaming his deific grin.

You find it hard to feel ashamed when subjected to such an obscene amount of affection, melting, his fingers across your jaw. He moves his hand, a gentle shake of your face. You sway.

"Is this why you always ask me to hold things?" And, at his guilty smile. "It is! 'Here, doll, hold my cup for me. Oh, baby, just the girl I was looking for – how good are you at jigsaw puzzles? Oh, hold my perfectly warm hands, I'm freezing.'" You imitate his lilting tenor.

He laughs, the sound emerging from deep in his chest. Startled, you realise. "Got me," he murmurs.

"You're ridiculous," you complain, though the gesture is so touching it comes out sounding like an admission of love.

His hand moves from your face to wrap around your shoulders, and he uses his height advantage to plant a firm kiss into the top of your head.

"I'm sorry I didn't wait for you to tell me. Just can't stand seeing you hurting."

"It's only a scratch."

"Maybe," he says, like he doesn't agree at all.

"I trust you," you say, in place of an apology. In place of, I should've told you before but I was worried, because I'm so worried all the time, and you're the only thing in my life I don't have to worry about.

He darts down, pressing a barely there kiss to your star shaped bandaid. "Thank you.”

[actualbird]

so we've seen mc's gifts and surprises for luke on his bday but im sure the next day at the monthly nxx meeting, the other boys have stuff they wanna give to luke as well (no arguments, it's nxx found family on this blog 24/7, all days of every year)

nxx boys' birthday gifts to luke!!!

wc: 942

vyn: very beautiful delicious cupcakes

vyn enjoys making pastries very much and the cupcakes are in no way troublesome for him to put together. he mulls over flavors and types for a while before settling on a combination he thinks suits luke best: something simple, something sweet, something you look at and irrationally think "i must protect you from the whole world." that last criteria makes vyn stop for a moment and he decides to unpack whatever THAT is later to his audio recorder.

he gives the cupcakes to luke the day after his birthday. the cupcakes, packed in a white box and secured with gold string, look way too fucking pretty to eat. when luke opens the box hes torn between "awww, vyn!!" and "VYN, THESE LOOK TOO NICE, I CANT EAT THEM, WHAT!!!" perfectly golden brown cake and delicate white frosting topped with caramel sauce. vyn rolls his eyes at luke's reaction and just tells him to try it which luke eventually does after fretting for a few more minutes.

once he does take a bite (and gets a dab of frosting on his cheek that he doesnt notice until later when mc comes in and laughs and wipes it off of his face) hes like

luke: ....i take it back, i need to eat all of these right now immediately at once.

vyn: please dont, you'll get a stomachache and mc will hunt me down for sport. which she can do now, given that ive taught her horseback riding and basic archery

luke: that sounds like a you problem!

still, vyn is pleased that luke likes his gift. idly, he wonders what else he can give luke thatll make his hesitation to accept good things go away. something thatll make him have no choice but just to enjoy things that come to him

-

artem: a broken video tape player

mc had mentioned to artem that luke likes broken stuff because he loves fixing it up and tinkering with it and possibly making it a weapon as well. so he goes on whats possibly the most excruciating shopping trip of his life and it's excruciating because he keeps having to say "no, i need one thats broken" which gets him a LOT of weird looks, but eventually he finds one.

and artem TRIES to giftwrap it. but by the end of 2 hours, hes just on the floor of his living room surrounded by crumpled gift wrapping paper and ribbons and tape and hes failed EVERY ATTEMPT which is baffling to him because. it's literally. folding paper over a thing. he gives up on the 6th try

so he just gives it to luke and it's just packed in the cardboard box the store put it in. before artem can apologize for the lacklustre packaging, luke opens it and hes like "oh hell yeah, ive been meaning to get one!!"

artem: it's...broken, by the way

luke: oh HELL YESSSSSSSSS

artem doesnt really understand why luke is so happy, but artem glad that he is. he reccommends luke a store he knows that sells movies on VHS tapes and luke nods excitedly as he looks over the video player, marvelling at everything thats useless about it.

how strange, artem thinks as he looks at luke smile and ramble about how busted the video tape player is. somebody who finds joy and personality in broken things and is just excited to make that thing better.

(after fixing it up, luke does make the video tape player into a little bit of a weapon. one of the buttons can spew out smokescreen.)

-

marius: everything peanut could have ever asked for

marius was originally going to make some art (natural choice, it's what marius does best) for luke but the moment the lead of his pencil touched the paper for the initial sketches, marius IMMEDIATELY backpedaled because he felt it was WAYYY too personal. so he thinks some more about what luke loves and on the top of that list is obviously mc but second place is absolutely

the dumbass pet bird of his, peanut

so marius gets it all. bird chew toys, foraging enrichment gizmos, and basically a lifetime supply of bird food and bird treats.

marius doesnt give his gift to luke personally at the nxx hq that meeting but he does tell luke "hey, i sent some deliveries to your place, theyre all paid for, happy birthday or whatever." and luke is like "what" and he gets to time's antiquities and theres SO MANY FUCKING BOXES

luke, texting: MARIUS

marius: you like? ;)

marius: or does peanut like

marius: unless youre into foraging enrichment mechanisms too

marius: is that what itll take to get you to chill out? we fill a puzzle box with french fries?

luke: kjdfbjBKKJK SHUT UP

luke: AND HOW DO YOU TEXT SO FAST

luke: and....thank you, for the gifts!!! i really appreciate it :D

and thats all marius needed to hear. luke is an idiot, he thinks. he'll refuse almost everything meant for him but if it's meant for somebody (or, uh, somebirdy) he loves, he accepts it with open (if a slightly alarmed) arms

marius does still wanna paint something for luke though. sometime in the future when luke can accept it for him and him alone.

[roughentumble]

Yen/Triss and Spideypool

!!!!! oooooo ok lemme think.....

Yentriss:

Gives nose/forehead kisses

i think maybe triss would do more of the little, casual affections like that. she likes to give love, and yen likes to be reminded she's cared for

Gets jealous the most

i definitely see triss getting jealous more than yen, though i think it takes quite a lot to get either of them to that point. but triss was chasing after her for so long that like, yen's attention straying too much definitely stings

Picks the other up from the bar when they’re too drunk to drive

they dont strike me as the clubbing type, but yen gives me more of a "picks triss up from a foolish drunken endeavor while hiding a fond little smile" type

Takes care of on sick days

they take turns, depending on who's sick, and they each have their own areas of expertise and drawbacks. yen always has cool hands to place on triss's forehead, and triss always knows how to make the best soup.

Drags the other person out into the water on beach day

triss 100% is convincing yen to get in the water, yen is completely content to just sit beneath the umbrella and read. but then once they do tet to the water, yen dunks triss just to make her sputter and laugh and it starts a whole lil game of splashing and teasing

Gives unprompted massages

they both do it, but triss does it More. she likes pampering yen when she's allowed to

Drives/rides shotgun

i think yen drives, triss rides shotgun.

Brings the other lunch at work

triss brings yen food. she likes knowing yen's taken care of, and yen likes knowing someone cares.

Has the better parental relationship

oof. neither of them is doing Great, but i think triss is doing slightly better, since she wasnt sold for less than the price of a pig

Tries to start role-playing in bed

triss. she knows yen has lots of toys and is into more Daring acts, so she brings it up to try and give yen something she'll like (but then they both end up having a VERY good time 😏)

Embarrassingly drunk dancer

yen, because triss knows how to dance and has a sort of infectious and sweet quality even when drunk, but with yen, when she's well and truly plastered it's just ridiculous. of course triss thinks it's the most endearing thing, though

Still cries watching Titanic

yen will say it's triss, which is true triss definitely cries, but yen will discreetly dab at the corners of her eyes when no one is looking.

Firmly believes in couples costumes

triss, absolutely.

Breaks the expensive gift rule during Christmas

yen. triss somehow always finds very personal and meaningful gifts, and yen always breaks the bank on something so beautiful triss doesnt even know what to say.

Makes the other eat breakfast

triss is always reminding yen to eat and take care of herself, but as soon as triss starts to flag she wakes up to a hearty omlette and a reprimand about taking care of everyone else at the expense of herself.

Remembers anniversaries

both. i think theyre about equally dutiful in the anniversary regard. triss maybe goes a little more all-out when she's the one planning their anniversary dates, but they both remember the date.

Brings up having kids

hmmmm..... i think triss says it first, but only because she sees that yen wants it and is too scared to breech the subject. but yen 1000% wants children.

.

Spideypool:

Gives nose/forehead kisses

once he realizes he's ALLOWED to, wade is constantly all the time giving pete lil kisses. forehead, cheek, nose, hand, goading him into spider-man kisses, anything he can get.

Gets jealous the most

wade. for sure wade.

Picks the other up from the bar when they’re too drunk to drive

not a common occurance for either, since it's hard for either of them to get drunk and pete isnt the type, but most likely wade would pick up pete.

Takes care of on sick days

wade, if only because he cant get sick. he can be a bit scatterbrained about it, or else unnervingly single-minded, but he means well and peter finds that he likes being fretted over a little bit

Drags the other person out into the water on beach day

they're both the sort to head straight to the water, i think, though perhaps peter would lovingly encourage wade towards the water if he was feeling insecure about his scars.

Gives unprompted massages

wade at first, very tactile and very excited by the idea of being allowed contact, but as peter opens up he starts giving as good as he gets.

Drives/rides shotgun

spidey doesnt trust deadpool behind the wheel(valid), but also grew up with superpower in new york and therefore never learned how to drive. the closest they get to driver and shotgun is pete webswinging with deadpool as a human backpack

Brings the other lunch at work

wade. he likes feeding peter, peter is more likely to hold down a Real Job, etc. wade also thinks its very fun to go through Normal Couple Activities. how consistent he is about it's pretty up in the air, but he enjoys it

Has the better parental relationship

peter, no contest.

Tries to start role-playing in bed

wade, no contest.

Embarrassingly drunk dancer

peter, because to be embarrassed you first have to have shame, which has never once been in wade's vocabulary.

Still cries watching Titanic

wade. absolutely wade. depending on the incarnation, despite being a full grown adult peter doesnt even remember titanic coming out because he was too young, and wade finds this to be SACRILEGE. titanic is a meme to 30 year old peter, sorry wade.

Firmly believes in couples costumes

wade, all the way. peter pretends to hate it, but also puts up with it good natured-ly, and is secretly fond of all his outrageous ideas and intense enthusiasm.

Breaks the expensive gift rule during Christmas

it was wade, until peter started refusing gifts bought with merc money, which pretty quickly put a ceiling on how expensive wade's gifts could get. pete doesnt mind tho since he grew up celebrating hannukah anyway, so xmas celebrations these days are just a blended household thing for him anyway

Makes the other eat breakfast

pete would forget his own head if it wasnt attached to his shoulders. wade's suggestions often arent healthy, but he always has a loaded breakfast burrito or something else filling at hand to shove on pete before he webswings out the door

Remembers anniversaries

it's a toss-up. wade cares more about specific dates, but with his memory issues he doesnt always remember exactly what day it is, etc. for peter, it isnt the dates themselves that matter so much as what they represent, and spider-man-ing always gets in the way of a nicely arranged schedule. they make it work, though.

Brings up having kids

hhhhhrrrrmmmmm......... i guess wade, in the sense of him one day saying "hey peter, i have a daughter, would you like to meet her?" but i dont think theyd be able to handle actually raising a child full-time.

.........

ok i think that's all of them! whew.

[rfadaydreaming]

what would the rfa smell like?

jumin ☞

that nice laundry smell after wash day, thats his smell. his aftershave has hints of sandalwood and vanilla in it which is noticeable too and literally delicious. after he shaves he smells like a dream. all the soaps he uses are either a generic soap smell or not scented at all. his dermatologist advises against fragrances so thats why he doesn’t use them much. doesn’t wear cologne unless its a special occasion or a date, too strong for his nose sometimes. but when he does its gucci. he just has a really nice smell that comes naturally, literally just one of those people that smells so good without trying and has his own smell. probably the pheromones.

zen ☞

coconuts and roses. he uses a coconut scented lotion/sunscreen all over his body, and his rose water adds a nice floral scent on top. his soap smells like cedar and cypress which leaves a nice lingering masculine smell after his showers. it doesn’t seem like it would all work together but they do and he smells amazing, like a delicious smokey dessert. like jumin he doesn’t use a cologne that often, but when he does like “midnight enchanted woods” with patchouli and sage or something. tries not to go crazy with it. he just has a really nice natural smell and its something his fans pick up on a lot. tries not to use a ton of chemicals when it comes to what he puts on his skin so its all ✨organic and fancy✨

yoosung ☞

he googled what smells attract women and bought whatever came up first. think of traditional old spice smell but with more of a “musk” because according to mens today women like musk. now that actually smells really good on him, its strong but not too much and smells masculine. but im so sorry, he uses three in one body wash. its probably labeled something like violent anarchy warzones: for MEN! the kind that smells like fragrant acid and hurts your eyes to smell sometimes but he thinks its manly so he likes it. he doesnt know any better, please take that away from him this instant and find this boy a proper routine. everything else is great though, he’s that guy you walk past in the store and he just smells really good and it grabs your attention.

jaehee ☞

if you’ve ever met someone who works at a coffee shop then you know exactly what she smells like, strongly like coffee and baked goods. a little bit of vanilla on the side. a full on snack, she cant really smell it on herself anymore because shes so used to it by now but you can and she always smells absolutely delicious. she likes more natural smells. her soaps are lavender and rosemary scented, and she sprays a perfume on herself called “white linen” it smells really fresh and clean, a hint of floral undertones. its lost the second she steps into work but smells amazing while it lasts.

seven ☞

so you’re gonna tell me he doesn’t use axe? dont you dare lie yes he does

doesn’t really care what he smells like just because he’s by himself most of the time. just sprays the shit out of himself before he leaves the house and probably will give you a chemical burn if you touch him. only starts to care more about his appearances after he meets you.

please help him he uses 3in1 and axe everything

once you help him sort all that out he smells like the generic “man smell” but the kind that actually smells really nice instead of trying to burn your nose off. you get him an aftershave for his birthday that smells downright erotic like sandalwood and frankincense, really spicy and earthy. he dabs a little on in his neck in the mornings even if he’s not shaving because it smells that good.

jihyun ☞

smells absolutely wonderful, has his routine down perfectly and invests in that kind of stuff. no weird alcohol or cheap chemical smells will ever be attached to him. uses cologne daily and it smells like tobacco and leather with a bit of cashmere vanilla its just so smokey and earthy and yum. its perfect and not too strong but just the right amount to grab your attention. he likes when people tell him he smells good. in the mornings he smells a little like coffee on top of all that and its just pure perfection, theres not a moment that goes by where this man doesn’t smell like heaven on earth

saeran ☞

actually smells really sweet, kind of like cotton candy and flowers with a little hint of strawberry on the side. doesnt mind smelling more “girly” since thats just what he likes and he doesnt go out often. he doesn’t use cologne or anything fancy, its just his soaps and shampoos. his shampoo is “tahitian garden” and it smells really sugary and flowery. the best is when he comes out of the shower when its super strong and he smells absolutely amazing. he has an aftershave thats more masculine smelling but he doesn’t use stuff like that too often. prefers to just to shower and go.

thanks for reading! find more on my mysme masterlist ♡!

[justalittletomato]

Pancake Mornings and Crab Apples ( Danica x Ava)

A November morning that’s a bit chilly and all I can picture is Dani still deeply asleep. Ava wakes quietly and kisses her cheek before getting out of bed and covering her up more. His Dani will not feel cold.

She makes a soft sound and nuzzles into the blankets. Eyes closed and arms still wrapped about the penguin plush Ava had gifted her yesterday.

Ava tries to be as quiet as can be. The kitchen shelves gently shut. The faint click of the stove. Slicing apples and mixing batter. Some cinnamon….

The familar sizzle of a pancake flipped. Another stacked on a plate. Ava hums to himself and doesnt hear the soft steps.

Danica yawns softly, and tilts her head confused at the sight.

Ava’s long hair braided as he cooks, a hum of a familiar song. The sweet smell of pancake wafting in the air.

“Ava?”

He flips a pancake and smiles at her, “Good morning, my Darling.”

“What are you doing?” She asks confused

Ava raises a brow, “ Making you pancakes, I’ve always made you pancakes.”

When they had been children, when they were rebels and the war was forgotten for a moment…when they lived on Yavin IV….Ava made her pancakes.

“Did I do something to deserve this?”

Ava feels his smile fade slightly, “ Danica…”

“Did you need me to do something?”

Do something? What did I do? What do you need?

Danica had sadly grown accustomed to receiving kind treatment if she did things prior…acknowledgment and a morsel of “love”

“No Dani, no my Darling. I just wanted to make your favorite.” She sits at the table.

“Apple and cinnamon pancakes?” She questions.

Ava nods and sets a stack of them before her, “ With a dab of butter and syrup. I even found you Nova apples for the pancakes.”

Danica looks down, just like when they were small, shaped like bears and plentiful…

She loves pancakes…

Pancakes again? And why do you make them bear shaped…Sweetie no more pancakes…

She loved.

“I know you liked it when I made them like this, I’m a tad rusty. I hope they are okay. If not I’ll make another batch until they are perfect.”

“Why are you good to me?” She catches her tears before they fall onto her pancakes.

Ava sets down the caf in his hand, dark with two sugars and two creams…one he always made for Dani.

——

“Dani it’s not any different from before my Darling…” it pains him to tell her, he has always done things like this. Danica sadly thinks she has to have done something…being pitied…

“Dani listen to me…I love you and just want to make you pancakes like I used to. I want to make you caf and spend time with you….I want to be with you Dani.”

She cries and tries to keep her tears at bay, how can he love her when she’s done nothing but hurt him…how can he be so…

“ I love you my Darling, I’m doing as I have done since we met. I want to be at your side, let me stay with you.”

—-

Eventually her tears stop, and her pancakes are still fluffy and warm.

There is nothing but love, not earned or deserved. Just love that has grown for years and years…

Dani happily devours her food and Ava is back again to make her a few more. Her arms wrapped about his waist as he cooks away. Tomorrow he will make her blueberry pancakes.

Ava is good to her…she does not deserve it…she didn’t have to earn it….Ava is good to her because he is….and he always will be.

—-

[tricewithaz]

Ok Trice, seeing as your the only adult is person I know, eyeliner is scary, but my classmate said I had great eye shape for it and I should try it. I asked my mom and she was just sooooooo helpful and said “you take off the can and the. Grab your phone and then ask the internet” so now I’m asking you seeing as you

Omg you came to the right place 👁️👄👁️ i love eyeliner and eye makeup and ive been doing it for so long jebrbr

Beware theres A LOT

Lets start with basic products alright. It depends on the style you want but the very basics are: liquid eyeliner (i had the kiko liquid black liner ). Just make sure it has a lot of coverage and dries really dark. Also pencil eyeliner, you want one that is sort of creamy. I reccomend getting a brown and a black one. And youll probably want a neutrals palette too. Make sure it has all sorts of browns and black. it doesnt have to be pure black but its nice to have one. And with this palette youre gonna want a small flat angled and probably (but not necessarily) fluffy brush like these

Again, it all depends on the style. Liquid eyeliner is much more precise and bold. It can be quite dramatic. For a good sharp eyliner youre gonna want to trace a line from the corner of your eye to the end of your eyebrow. You can sketch it with eyeshadow or put a tape where you wsnt your eyeliner to make sure you dont draw over it. The way i do it is hovering over the line i would want as if i was drawing it then actually start to draw it on the end of it (you can honestly make it as long as you want. A shorter one gives a sweeter image) and go back to the eye pressing the brush (remember the brush needs to be pointy). The trick is having a confident short stroke. And dont worry you can always tweak it with concealer or makeup remover and a qtip. Its also easy to take a cotton pad, dab it in makeup remover and fold it to the middle then press it to the overdrawn eyeliner you want to get rid of.

A pencil eyeliner is ideal for your waterline. You just open your eye a bit with your hand and paint it in. You dont have to do it but it does give a dramatic look. Depending of the creaminess of the pencil you might be able to do the cat eye too. You can paint a blob on the corner of your eye and extend it outward with the flat brush and inward with the fluffy one. But its not the best tecnique foe this i normally use eyeshadow.

So EYESHADOW. Doingeyeliner with eyeshadow normally gives a softer look,although you can make it look bold and graphic if the pigment is good enough (and if you dont have bright eyeliner you can take your fave color eyeshadow and do it with that). So for this what i dois take the flat brush,dab it in a bit of water and take pigment and then just press it to the corner of my eye in the angle i want and do a big stroke. Then do the same inward and fill it in if necessary. If you want bold graphic liner tho (and you dont want or odnt have liquid liner) you should take a very small brush like this (it doesnt need to be specifically a makeup brush,get one made for paint its super cheap and made for precision)

You can wet it and make sure its pointy and ready to paint with your fingers, then dab it in whatever color you want. And just as with the liquid eyeliner, start where you want it to end and use bold confident strokes!

If you want a bit of depth with your eyeliner (you should do this before the actual eyeliner) take the fluffy brush and dab it in a dark brown color (this needs to be darker than your skin) then apply a bit to the corner of your eye and blend it. You can do it upward and in the direction of your eyelid or on the direction of the eyeliner,it looks good either way.

And the most fun part is the inner corner! You can do this in the middle of the eyelid too. The safest option is a shimmery pearl white or gold (gold pops so well on dark skin and gives a sort of sun warm look) but if you wanna go rogue take a really bold color (i would avoid blue tho cause most pigments end up looking sort of greenish and dull on the skinits really hard to find a *good* blue)and just apply it to the inner corner. You can just use your finger,the fluffy brush to blend it into your lid or a flat round brush to do just that. Make sure the color you choose is either a bright/saturated color, (like pink or yellow,doesnt matter if its matte or shimmery) light shimmery one or ome that has a light second tone (the neon w7 green palette has a brown/green shimmery tone that is just beautiful).

You can also do your lower lash line with a flat brush! Just follow the lashline up to the outer corner. Brown and black look cool (and you can always do the reverse eyeliner and merge it with the cat eye) bur irs also really fun and cute to use bold colors.

You can also go further and do the whole foxy eye thing by just drawing a line into your inner corner following your actual eye. I find this a bit hard (the bridge of my nose is too wide) but you can try. Youll achieve the same effect drawing into it with the pencil liner the same way you do your waterline.

TL:DR,get yourself black and brown liquis liner,pencil liner and eyeshadow and a flat angled small brush and draw that line to yoour eyebrow as long as you want.

Well that was EXTENSIVE, but i hope it was helpful!!! Sorry i just have a lot of thoughts about eyeliner lmao. But have a lot of fun and dont be affraid to experiment!!

[heyswagmoney]

for @pixelavi

putting under the cut, !! weed/drug warning !!

what i imagine the dream smp characters are like in their own smoke circle

(not including minors)

dream - a lightweight and he knows it. cant take bong hits, at all (still tries). gets tired and lays on people. relies on others to keep him from getting dehydrated.

george - takes more hits than his own bodyweight. is scared to smoke anything out of glass, because hes scared of breaking it. 

sapnap - takes every big hit as a challenge. “bro wanna see me take a dab and a blunt hit?” eats all the snacks, but also is the one to order everyone food.

techno - takes little tiny baby hits because hes scared hell get too high. Always Gets Too High. either disassociates or rambles about The Dumbest Shit.

quackity - Will Not Turn Down A Hit. a great smoker. makes fun of people for coughing.

nihachu - affectionate. likes blunts, because theyre “her sized”. tells quackity off for making fun of people.

fundy - gets second hand high/eats edibles. is really funny but has a bad habit of encouraging bad behavior. 

punz - giggles at everything. the hype man. takes big hits, because he aint no Bitch. 

eret - FUNNY AS FUCK this man cracks the best jokes. makes fun of lightweights while taking care of them.

badboyhalo - Designated Driver part 1

jschlatt - heavyweight. smokes 4 bowls without thinking. Loud.

wilbur soot - biggest lightweight on earth. pretends he is schlatt. is usually the one to wake up with a “weed hangover”

philza - usually doesnt get really high, is mostly there to watch the others. in control of the money and key distribution. 

awesamdude - Designated Driver part 2 (they switch off, its mostly bad)

captain puffy - Joins Sapnap In His Challenges. buys different pipes because she thinks theyre pretty.

connoreatspants - kinda just quiet, until he zones back in and hears something funny. pro-bong

jack manifold - is barely legal. does not know what hes doing. “do u guys wanna see my smoke trick?”

antfrost - very chill. supplies food with sapnap. just here to have a good time. “whos taking the roach?”

skeppy - gets really high and annoys bad. tries really hard to get him to smoke too (fails, every time).

karl jacobs - gets really hyped up. likes his little cart, because it stays with him where he goes. taught jack the smoke tricks.

[yulmoldauer]

okay okay okay but FOLLOW UP: Nolan with a little boy who loves dress up and tea parties and princesses and you know what maybe that little boy grows up and is able to tell you and Nolan that they have always been a little girl but maybe he is a boy who likes """girl""" things and either way thats okay with Nolan! because his kid fucking rocks and he'll support their interests and identity no matter what even if stupid hockey culture tries to get in there and mess it up!

OP I LIKE THE WAY YOU THINK.

so like. yall were *always* fine with the fact that your little girl was in every sport she could get her hands on, was one of the most aggressive kids out there, all that. tbh y’all were proud as hell seeing her thrive and love what she did

your second kid you were also totally okay with him not really being as into playing sports (though he absolutely loved the energy of watching sports his sister, dad, other family, etc were in!). in fact, he ended up finding all the stereotypical girly stuff people got for your oldest that she ended up not really using/playing with. (even tho you guys were clear that gender roles could fuck themselves! that didn’t mean you’d shut her off from the dolls and pink and all that)

you guys just assumed your youngest was a boy that liked dresses and skirts and all the other stuff. nothing wrong with that!

(and yes, you guys all dressed up for tea parties, fashion shows, etc. your oldest didn’t dislike dresses, but when she found out she could wear one of her dad’s ties and her kick ass leggings? man she ROCKED that runway)

there was never any questioning him, grilling him. you guys kept him away from people who would be negative toward him, and thankfully he was young enough that you could keep him from seeing things about him in the media

though, Nolan came out multiple times to say that yall didnt care what anyone thought. your kids were happy and healthy, that’s what mattered.

other guys also shared the same sentiment with the media, which was nice. it was good to know everyone who you kept your kids around did support them

as the two got older but couldn’t drive, Nolan would make days out of taking them to makeup stores and letting them run the show. he sure as hell didn’t know how that worked (and I'm leaving it up to you whether or not they learned more from you or the internet haha) but he’d sit there all day and let them test colors on his skin

sometimes they’d sweet talk tk or another friend of your guys’ to come too

(side note: imagine Nolan being dragged around whatever makeup store with tk going “that lipstick is tiny. how the hell does it cost that much” and tk just looks at him like ‘dude-you-make-a-nhl-salary?’ but also doesnt say anything bc yall aren't gonna raise your kids to throw money around like its nothing. these kids have chores and allowances for that until theyre old enough to get a job if they want their own spending money)

(tk has to quickly google every brand to make sure its cruelty-free for the kids too)

eventually the kids were getting older and your oldest was off to college (on a scholarship for ice hockey, you’d brag) and the youngest was smack dab in the middle of high school, arguably one of the suckiest times in a person’s life

your youngest sat down with the two of you over dinner and told you that they’re a girl. and no, it’s not because they just dont like gender sterotypes--they legitiamately feel this way

and who the fuck are you guys to say anything negative. she’s the one living in that body. she knows herself the best.

Nolan, that night, lays down with you in bed and lets out a sigh.

“I'm so proud of her,” he murmurs. “and I'm just glad he--she, fuck, sorry--was comfortable enough telling us.”

“yeah,” you’d agree, rubbing circles into his back. “I told her we’d help pick out a new name if she wants us to”

you got a smile at that before it quickly faded

“I just worry--I mean, obviously, this shit ain’t easy for anyone to do. but with us kinda being in the public eye...”

“hey,” you’d grab his hand and make him look at you. “we got this. we did it when she was a kid, we’ll just keep telling everyone to fuck off and mind their business. at least now that she’s older, she can decide if and when she wants to tell people. before it was a rough guessing game of what people should or shouldn’t know”

he nodded, letting out another sigh. a bit of a relieved one, this time.

“I dunno how we got lucky enough to have two bad ass kids.”

you’d snort. “we weren’t saying that when they were both throwing fits not-too-long-ago because they’re fucking stubborn. but yeah, it paid off.”

op I would give you a fat kiss on the lips for this idea I love you (if you wanted it obviously. id also give u a crisp high five or fist bump if u wanted)

[schiavonaspada]

Oliver! (1968) Live (re) watch!

i have already seen oliver!, but not in ages, so i decided to watch it again, enjoy

very long post warning

fuckin hell these opening credits are LONG

i love the fact instrumentals of songs in the movie are playing

i have chocolate popcorn, apple lucozade and oliver! on, life is good

yes i know mark lester is oliver ive seen this like 20 times can i watch the film now

OH ABOUT FUCKING TIME

god is love

IS IT WORTH THE WAITING FOR IF WE LIVE TILL 84 ALL WE EVER GET IS GRUELL

i forgot how much of a banger food glorious food is

LOOK AT BABY MARK LESTER 🥺🥺🥺

ads in middle of movie be like

its harry secombe!

AMENNNN

oliver gets bullied the movie

look at this poor kid

MOREE????????

oh yes oliver i love this song

O L I V E R

poor kid

without any bannister yikes

the one who named him........O-L-IV-ERRR

oh were outside now

olivers just been kicked out oh shit

but on the plus side he has a cute ass hat on

BOY FOR SAY AL

look at oliver 🥺 he deserves better

SOWERBERRY MORE LIKE SHITTERBERRY

theres a severe lack of thats your funeral and i shall scream

noah claypole more like noah clayprick

“perhaps... if i had a tall hat?” BABEY

HES GOT HIS TALL HAT ON YES OLIVER

oliver said dab on them haters from your old gaff youre a funeral advisor now and theyre still homeless

DONT INSULT HIS MUM FUCK YOU NOAH

YES OLIVER KILL HIM

yes stuff the nine year old in a coffin and sit on it well done

"OLIVAH ??" "Yes im here: ((("

ITS MEAT!

oliver deserves better man 

im gonna cry and were like 25 minutes in.

ik its not mark singing but whoever it is CAN SING WTF

i want to give him a hug

OH SHIT HES RUNNING AWAY

hes in the lettuce

LONDON YOU MADE IT !

yes oliver trains exist

DODGER!!!

whach you starin at aint ya ever seen a toff

the beak

look at lil jack wild

me more hintimate friends

cockney accent™️

the artful dodga

CONSIDERR YOURSSELF AT HOEME COSNIDER YOURSWLF OEN OF THE FAMILY !!!!!!!!!!

im sorry i love this song

look this scene is awesome, but it would be COMPLETE with charley oh wait he was demoted to extra and everything interesting abt him was given to dodger

he should have gotten the nobody tries to be ladeeda or uppity bit I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL

this cast is BIG

okay i am a Charger Enthusiast but do we all agree there is something oddly homosexual about oliver and dodger in this song

note how dodger is scared of the police FORESHADOWING

ive taken to this SO STRONGITSCLEARWEREGOINGTOGETALONG

how many extras is this ???? yall better be gettin paid

its dodga comin up

this set is sraight out of the book i love it

CHARLEY MATE IM SORRY THEY MADE YOU AN EXTRA 

“oh not again” does dodger just always show up with random workhouse kids 

ah yes fagin the character whos still a negative jewish stereotype

more and more big cast

THESE SAUSAGES ARE MOULDY! (am i going to freak out whenever charley does anything because i love him? yes)

stfu drink your gin

is this a laundry?? no fam 

THE BEST FUCKING SONG IN THIS MUSICAL

IN THIS LIFE ONE THING COUNTS

sorry if i dont add to this until pick a pocket or two is done bc its a straight banger

this song is EVERYTHING 

hard at work lol ok

did he make those himself??? no

couple a wipes

EMBROIDERED THEM??? no

petition for all oliver twist adaptations to refer to charley as master bates like the book and for him to have actual lines and not have his actor switched at least three times

i dont even now who charley is at this point because his actor is switched many a time im just gonna say purple blazer kid is charley

anyway charley bates supremacy

whos bill sikes??? NO

fuck bill all my homies hate bill

rum tum tum is a banger

go bed now

take your hat off in bed dodger

movie fagin has rights

fagin leaving where will he go

BET IS THAT YOU

FUCK OFF BILL NO ONE LIKES YOU 

NANCY NANCY HES HERE !!!!!! bet deserves everything and more ily 💖

NANCYYYY!!!!!!

its a fine life more like its a banger

wheres all of bets lines gone

bet 🤝 charley (being demoted to extras)

its not funny anyore bet.. bet girl please sing youre the best fucking thing about this song

such a happy song about domestic abuse

THERE SHE IS THATS MY GIRL BET I FUCKING LOVE YOU

bullsye rights!

i hate how this movie made fagin more symathetic but he’s still a “greedy jew” stereotype

oliver?????

at this moment fagin knew he fucked up

nancy you deserve better than bill

oh hi dodger forgot you existed

and the rest of you except oliver

ah yes charley “sausages” bates i missed you

THESE FUCKING KIDS THEY ALL LOVE BET AND NANCY MY HEART

im a regular gent i am. no dodger you arent

why is “permit me to assist you across the road” so fucking funny

pov dodgers back on his bullshit so you have to pretend to be a horse and cart for him

not “sir artful” 😭😭😭

anyfink for youu

WHAT FISTICUFFS???!!!

i feel sorry for the child extras man theyve prob had to film this scene like ten times

THESE KIDS CAN SING

 the boys dancing with eachother is too fucking wholesome i love this

again, movie fagin rights

weed riissk lifee and limmbb

you promised we could go see the angin!!!!!

ats on boys time were off

THIS IS MY FAVOURITE SONG

HOW COULD WE LET HOW COULD WE FORGET OUR DEAR OLD FAGIN WORRY!!

mate that aint single file did you not hear him

am i the only one who can hear london bridge is falling down in the back??

our pockets hold a watch of gold that chimes upon the hour!!! a wallet fat an old mans hat!!! the jewels from the tower!!!

WE KNOW THE NOSEY POLICEMEENNNN

dodger and charley (i am SURE charley is purple blazer kid even if havent seen this film in ages) are GETTING INTO THIS

oliver 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

movie fagin rights pt 27238227

DODGER OLIVER COME ON!!!!!!!!! alright dude chill

ARE YALL SEEING THIS SHIT, I WAS RIGHT, I TOLD YOU THAT THE LAD IN THE PURPLE BLAZER WHO SINGS “a wallet fat an old mans hat” WAS CHARLEY BATES AND GUESS WHAT HE FUCKING IS. I WAS RIGHT, PURPLE BLAZER KID IS CHARLEY YOU CAN LEAVE NOW

no dont were only an hour in

three kids on the back of the omnibus what will they do

dodger and charley said be gay do crimes

ah shit now look what youve gotten us into dodger

IT WASNT EVEN OLIVER IT WAS CHARLEY AND DODGER GO AFTER THEM

are dodger and charley straight up framing oliver for a crime they commited while also helping him escape

yes they are why are we surprised 

i hate to break it to you dodger but hiding oliver in a meat sack doesnt work

OLIVERS ON THE ROOF????

charley and dodger got oliver into this mess and they are not going to get him out

WHY DIDNT YOU LOOK AFTER HIM????? right calm down fagin

how could i help it :((((

no bill!

stan nancy

“two other boys stole it” no shit

BROWNLOW !

run bitch run

right intermission time now

AND WE’RE BACK!

entr acte

who will buyyy

strawberry girl is carrying this

oliver owns my heart pt 278983728938728

this is a banger wtf

okay its done now right

right?????

UHH BILL???? DODGER???? BITCH WHY TF ARE YOU HERE

have bill fagin nancy and the boys been stalking oliver???

NO SHE WONT FAGIN!

shit.

fuck bill

this scene is far more sadder when you think of how the boys have just seen the only woman they see as a mother figure been hit to the flo or, im not crying, you are

as long as he needs me :(

FUCK YOU BILL

rose maylie is that you?!

look at lil oliver!!

BILL FUCK OFF

i hate bill

“look at his togs! he’s got books too!” charley and dodger are my emotional support kids

anyway have i mentioned i hate bill, bc i hate bill.

I REALLY REALLY HATE BILL

even fagin aka the guy whos keeping these kids as pickpockets has more morals than bill

WE STAY CALM!!

no bill i havent heard a dying chicken

act one was just childish antics now we have THIS

fuck bill

YOURE TELLING ME THE BOYS WATCHED THAT????

jack wild is a banging actor. he genuinely looks terrified 🥺 

this film.. 

a mans got a heart hasnt he?? yes you do!!!

a full song dedicated to movie fagin rights?? did i ghostwrite this?? probably

banger

ithinkidbetterthinkitoutagain!

villains theives and nine year olds

MR BUMBLE?????!!!!!!!!!!

fuck bill pt72898376728909878199

bill youre traumatising him

cmon nance do something!!

also completely forgot abt this but uh does monks exist in this i forgot bc we have had no mentions of him yet

nancy tell him who bill is!!!

bullseye deserves better

uhm what is going on

bill sikes more like bill yikes

oliver what are you doing

BILL TERRIFIES ME

FUCK

omg oom pah pah????

leave oliver alone bill hes like nine

oh banger

OOM PAH PAH THATS HOW IT GOES!!!!!!!!!

just asking are nancy and bet lesbians bc they look it

COULD IT BE OOM PAH PAHHHHHH

god i love this song

IT SHOOOOOWSSSSSS

its the same oom pah pah

“She was from the country but now shes up a gumtree she let a fella feed her then lead her a long” foreshadowiinnggg

OOM PAH PAH! OOM PAH PAH! OOM PAH PAH!

nancy is so fucking smart

getting the whole pub singing and dancing to smuggle out oliver? clever

fuck

bill.. no.. bill.. bill????

FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKC

BILL GET OFF HER

NANCY NO

HE STRAIGHT UP COMMIT MURDER AGAINST THE NICEST CHARACTER

BROWNLOW DO YOU NOT HEAR NOTHING

nancy deserved a better death than to be killed by bill fuck bill

EVEN BULLSEYE HATES YOU BILL

ARE THEY ACCUSING BULLSEYE OF MURDER

FUCK YOU BILL

movie fagin rights + fuck bill combo?

youre telling me fagin had an ESCAPE ROUTE??? AT THE BOTTOM OF THE HOUSE THING??? THE WHOLE TIME???

BILL DONT KILL THE CHILD

BILL

fuck, well. #

“WHAT DO I DO!?” “LIVE UP TO YOUR NAME, DODGE ABOUT”

ten quid says dodgers been caught

oh no all fagins shit is gone

BILL DONT KILL THE CHILD PT 2

FUCK YOU BILL

GOD I HATE HIM

OLIVER MATE ARE YOU OK

never have i been so happy to see a character die

rest in shit bill

hi dodger thought you got caught n went to australia 

god, this film is so fucking good.

reviewing the situation 2.0 goes hard

MOVIE. FAGIN. RIGHTS!

FAGIN YOU CAN BE A GOOD MAN YOU KNOW YOU CAN

DODGER??????????

IM TOTALLY NOT CRYING RN

FAGIN NO DONT TAKE IT

FUCKING PLOTTWIST

IT MADE IT LOOK LIKE FAGIN WAS GONNA GIVE THE WALLET BACK TO DODGER BUT NO

once the villain you’re the villain to the end

i completely forgot abt this scene since i’ve been reading the oliver twist book and in that dodger gets arrested and fagin gets hanged but here they get away?

god this is bittersweet

I THINK WE’D OUGHT TO THINK IT OUT AGAIN!!!!!

thats where the film should have ended, i get olivers the main character but it ending on dodger and fagin walking out into the sunset is such a pleasing ending man

oliver gets his happy ending abt time

YES CONSIDER YOURSELF AND BE BACK SOON (THE BIGGEST BANGERS IN THE FILM) CREDITS SONGS!!

well.. that was a journey and half

[saltedsour]

tutorial level lore (for real)

i didnt proofread this after 1.75 hours of typing and that's your fault because i said so

expect typos and nonsense

CORRUPTED:

everybody forgets about him like wtf,,,.???? i swear everybody just goes "HIIIII IM SO HAPPY ALL FOUR OF US ARE HERE" "please i'm right here"

playlist mode also forgot about him 😢

to be fair i forgot about them until right as i started typing

also needs a hug. actually fuck that they all need a hug

the,,, the shortest,,... i i cannot..... they're short oh my gosh

probably one of those wiggly cactus fucks but like angry at everything

also the youngest out of all of em.... babeyyyyyyyy...

110% has a cool scarf i mean come on guys

ok to differentiate between corruption and this fucker's name i'm gonna give him a capital C at the start

tbh they all have that certain vibe that i can't explain rn rn but corrupted and blixer the most so uhhhhhh they vibe together share a vibe yeah

unironically dabs

probably the less focused on MURDERING spicy player shapes

"Okay look ASSHOLES I was the first out all of us to be pink so y'all should really treat me with more respect" they don't

has the best song and ill fight you over that

would look rlly cool if they were like....... not Corrupted just not them

glares at chronos every time he says wink out loud.

his last name's probably kyle

CHRONOS:

doesnt have a face anymore. it's a clock now.

NO his face doesn't mostly tell the time accurately and that pisses logic off the most.

ironically dabs

maybe the tallest but maybe logic's taller i haven't rlly decided yet ok ok

he cant right now he's dunking his bible in milk

rlly wants to eat food sometimes so he just yeets like fucking corn flakes at his face. milky ways also sometimes yeets corn flakes at his face.

"Wowwwww you guys have FACES??? smh."

maybe believes the world is flat

types for 20 minutes after you insult him online

would set fire to the tree of life and watch every second of them burning

the tree's probably fireproof tho and like i don't think fighting the fucking shape goddess went well last time??? didn't it??? now u dont have to worry abt getting ur face hurt that's for sure

Probably part enderman at this point like what the fuck how did you get out of that locked room???? You just see him fucking leave out of another room like OK CHRONOS

says wink out loud

does the most jobs for the tree (outside of what they all usually do)

what they're supposed to do (teach those spicy player shapes to not die) isn't what they actually do now (try to kill spicy player shapes unless they're good enough to not die and get the fuck out of there!!!)

Genuinely misses having a face.

MILKY WAYS:

she has the most braincells. and eyes. three eyes. (and three braincells)

second shortest,!!! will fight you

probably the most reliable at reading anything

"okay guys it's been fun but i'm going to space now" *walks out of the room*

probably would be like rlly competitive in video games and like whenever they suddenly win when you were about to win you hear them gleefully cackling thats actually rlly wholesome wtf me

"guys is the world flat yes or no" "does my life depend on the answer???" "YES. YES IT DOES, CHRONOS." "uuuuuuuHHhhHHhhHh"

probably added megalovania to the group's playlist (if they had one.................)

the tree of life definitely once yeeted the fucker she just grabbed her fucking face and went YEET!!!!! no idea why but that 100% happened

played minecraft and left a review saying there wasn't enough squares

fought Corrupted and won

"i'm gonna munch. i'm gonna crunch" just steals somebody's fucking c h i p s and SPRINTS away

strong shitpost energy tbh??

doesn't know the difference between astronomy or astrology

nobody can see any stars™️ where they live and she rlly wants to see stars™️ (it's her aesthetic ok) (smh) (you wouldn't get it)

they might just be in the fuckign void thats not rlly an aesthetic

LOGIC GATEKEEPER:

doesn't understand most memes tbh

YAAYYYYYY SECOND TALLEST.... or NOT!!!!!!!!!!

"guys ur not being logical....... 💔"

would whisper wikipedia articles to you <3

i'd say they could do the best maths out of everybody but rlly i dont trust them with 1 + 1

unironically would type like... this... sometimes...

"guys why are you awake it's like 3 am" "shut the fuck up logic we're eating stolen c h i p s"

probably has rlly cool legs (i forgot to delete this but now i'm kinda liking what me 10 minutes ago said)

they maybe broke 1 law but it was just one of the laws of reality (like a fucking nerd smh)

T-poses regularly to assert dominance over the three shorter peasants.

actually the only one that still likes the tree of life. "GUYS GUYS SHE'S COOL WTF???" "logic please she fucking deleted my face"

fought Corrupted once and lost

favourite flavour drink is water

everybody probably calls them logic because saying three more syllables is just too hard

BLIXER. THAT FUCK:

angry!!

also dabs but maybe???? ironically (he doesn't know either anymore)

wtf he's directly middle height to everybody (bht he's taller than everybody in that stinky new game form though so good for him)

punches stuff!!!!!

"guys where are my c h i p s"

he has a pupil but only sometimes for no reason

probably went into the tutorial gang like wayyyy after everybody else so he's the new shape™️

"hey guys check out this neat selfie" he just shows them an image of sans

kinda "died" but he actually just took over the world

the tree of life also tells everybody what they need to know rn rn so like she just went "heyyy yeah he died 😭 have fun guys" and went off to go be mean to him for like. ever.

he is a cat. he will never forget that. everybody keeps reminding him plEASE GUYS

ahhhhhhhhhh!! water scary

types for a fucking hour if you insult him online

rlly needs a hug

tired 24/7

probably wears a hoodie. all the time. even in the summer.

most focused on spicy player shape murder.