#{and i mean practice of everything}
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Empurata!Prowl tries to actually communicate for the first time
What if he wants to say something but he can’t. What if he has no voice to speak, no face to emote, no hands to write. What if every attempt to communicate a message is essentially a puzzle of wit and creativity and yet, the first thing he goes through all these troubles for. Is to say “I love you”?
Don’t ask me how did they get in this room. I have no idea. They escaped the battlefield somehow haha
Next->
#maccadam#transformers#prowl#jazz#jazzprowl#empurata prowl#at first I thought hmmm well the guy like Prowl would probably say something practical#but then I realised that there isn’t anything more practical for him than feelings right now#because that one statement implies SO much. you know what I mean#it won’t let Jazz know if Prowl has his whole memory and personality and everything back#but it would let him know that hey#hey I feel. I feel and I’m being me enough to feel that I love you#the cold and logical shadowplayed machine would never start with this
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My mom (and my sister) said that both baby Stan and Ford are adorable but Ford is cuter and she likes him better and I think my heart is shattered.
This post is dedicated to my favorite kid Stanley panels:
My mom didn’t even like him when I showed the one where he murders those two kids 😭😭😭 that’s the best part!!!
#gravity falls#stanley pines#stanford pines#I just wanna hold him and tell him he’s wonderful and creative and amazing#he’s trying his best#hes just a baby HES JUST A BABY#she doesn’t like that he’s a con man but MAYBE he wouldn’t have become a con man if he had a better support group 😤😤😤#I mean c’mon this kid had practically NO ONE#the only one there for him was his brother#and he was always over shadowed by his brother#everything he did in comparison wasn’t enough#and so yeah he takes shortcuts to catch up and then all he knows to do is lie and cheat because anything else he tried to do got shot down#HE WANTED TO DRAW COMICS DAMNIT#and really he was also pretty skilled in crafting! like foot bot and the boat he built with his brother#he probably just didn’t realize that that was impressive because of course it wasn’t his brother was doing things ten times cooler#YOU GUYS WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND HIM THE WAY I DO#😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#AND THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH MY CHILDHOOD#WHERE I WAS *ALSO* OVER SHADOWED BY MY SIBLING AND FELT THAT I WAS NEVER GOOD ENOUGH#AND I’D GET IN TROUBLE FOR SHIT I DIDNT DO#AND WAS CONSIDERED THE SCREW UP#THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THAT.#SHUT UP.
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hope you feel better soon!
I am riddled with ailments, but I stay silly!
#ask#non mdzs#My health journey has been: Hernia -> acid reflux -> Vocal pain due to aforementioned reflux -> chest infection.#I'm terrified to know what's about to hit me next. Please let it be something kind. PLEASE.#The consequence of living with linguists is that you'll wake up with a wacked up voice -#suddenly you're sitting you down in front of a program called something like Praat having your shimmer and jitter levels calibrated.#They gave me a GRBAS of 33012. I have a fun thing called a pitch break where a whole octave just does not exist.#My vocal pain was bad enough I ended up seeing a speech pathologist and that whole experience was super neat!#I learnt a lot about voice - to be honest I might make a little comic on it after some more research. Fascinating stuff.#For example; your mental perception of our voice modulates the muscles of the vocal folds and larynx.#meaning that when you do have changes (inflammation = more mass = lower frequency)#your brain automatically attempts to correct it to what it 'should sound like'. Leading to a lot more vocal strain and damage!#And it gets really interesting for trans voice care as well - because the mental perception of one's voice isn't based on an existing sampl#So a good chunk of trans voice training is also done with the idea of finding one's voice and retraining the brain to accept it. Neat!#Parkinsonial Voice also has this perception to musculature link! The perception is that they are talking at a loud/normal volume#but the actual voice is quite breathy and weak. So vocal training works on practicing putting more effort into the voice#and retraining the brain to accept the 'loud' voice as 'normal'.#Isn't the human body fascinating?#Anyhow; Now I have vocal exercises and strategies to reduce strain and promote healing.#Which is a lot better than my previous strategy of yelling AAAH in my car until my 'voice smoothed out'.#You can imagine the horror on the speech path's face. I am an informed creature now.#I'm my own little lab rat now. I love learning and researching. Welcome to my tag lab. Class is dismissed.#I'll be back later with a few more answered asks </3 despite everything I'm still going to work and I need the extra sleep.#Thank you for the well wishes! And if you read all of that info dump; thank you for that as well!
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Ogata and his Ogakittens
#this was originally meant to be a color practice but i like how it turned out so now you get to see it on Tumblr dot com#i've been obsessed with this man for over 3 years you are free to point and laugh#no meaning behind everything being green i just like green#illustration#my art#fanart#gk fanart#digital art#art#drawing#golden kamuy#gk ogata#ogata hyakunosuke#i hate him#i love him#human art#human#does he qualify as human#he is a cat#to me at least#gk#talk to me about him and my life is yours#might make this into a print
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Team VIP
A cat crew coming to you sometime not Soon™
#pokemon#pkmn#art#pkmnart#pokemon mystery dungeon#pmd#purrloin#zeraora#floragato#pmd ocs#(oc) vex#(oc) ion#(oc) poppy#(oc) team vip#wanted to practice some monochrome and i guess these three just ended up as the focus of it - been meaning to reveal the team for a while#it was actually not planned for all of these three to be cats but it kinda happened so we're rolling with it#i also don't know how much of a surprise it is that vex is here but she is!#been meaning to bring her back into a proper setting after her old one kinda. fell apart#but i've been planning a lot with these three! can't give away everything obviously but if yall are interested send any questions my way o7
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#merry christmas i mean november 4th#this is very scandi chrismas coded since its all i know#soooo excited for this weekend its mortensaften so were having duck and everything !!#mortensaften is basically just christmas dinner practice day#agere blog#sfw interaction only#age regression#agere#sfw agere#sfw age regression#age dreaming#agedre#agere moodboard#agere boy#boy regression#boyreg#boyre#sfw boyre#christmas agere
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In real life, the traddest men I know: change diapers; do chores; are present and playful with their kids; take good care of their wives; work 50+ hours a week to provide for their families; literally never think about the 1950s.
#there is literally ONE (1) guy at my trad parish who is kind of a problem. he’s a) young b) apparently terminally online#and he is surrounded by the other trad husbands who have quietly mutually agreed to Change Him#my life#everything online is disconnected from reality and an aesthetic pipe dream#in real life trad communities differ just like other communities do#but my parishes are not that unusual#there’s a variety of opinion and practice but everybody is basically grounded and sane#our kids may struggle when they grow up but like. don’t we all#no matter what you do you can’t struggle or rebellion proof your kids#I have a foot in at like 5 different parish groups. I don’t attend them all regularly but I have strong ties with them#besides - ask five trads what it means to be trad and guess how many answers you’re going to get#more than 10 for certain#my catholic thoughts
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This is the face of a man who's going to take that magical rock and use it to mutilate and traumatize some children.
....RIIIIGHT after he traumatizes a different child first.
And that's just a normal Thursday for him.
#trent ikithon#critical role#cr spoilers#the legend of vox machina#tlovm#tlovm spoilers#it's so nice to see how many problems can be traced right back to the Cerberus Assembly#I mean...Trent and this...Ludinus and practically everything he touches...#Ludinus was on the Assembly when Delilah got the boot...#Once again evil wizards ruin everything.
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readers in the cod fandom when they find out they can curate their own experience and successfully avoid dark fics (stalking, noncon, dubcon) if they don’t wanna see them 😨😨😨😨
#and i hate the whole oh there’s no fluff!1!1 or whatever#because there literally is. if you look for it. there is.#what happened to don’t like don’t read? LMAO i was able to practice that when i was even 13#but y’all are grown ass people and you can’t do that?#and no i don’t mean that you HAVE to be okay with everything people write but damn 😭 if they’re tagging it correctly#then block and move on#also to add on re: fluff;;; if there’s none of it apparently. then request it to some authors??? i’m sure they’ll write it?????
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I don't understand how all you angst writers here do it. I'll draw like, 2-3 scratch marks on a character and go -- oh no! I've hurt him too much! He's so injured, can't do any more, nuh-uh. Gotta stop there.
#rottmnt#I mean I guess this applies to everything really#but I'm specifically referring to turtles here#I'll read a really awesome fic where a poor turtle (usually leo) practically gets beaten half to death#then when I try to draw a scene from it#it looks like he just tripped on the sidewalk or walked into a door#seriously - how do you all do it?#my post
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anyways . silly thing
#gravity falls#stanford pines#stanley pines#lg doodles#animatic#i want it done.get out of here u stupid dog#ITS CHEESY.IM SORRY ! IMSORRY <embarrassed .truly#but i think. a gf revival would not be complete w/o me trying my hand at a shitty animatic. this 1 is for me dwg#as annoying as the whole process was it was kind of fun ngl. . like ive never been good at keeping a consistent style or chara model#and this was rly good practice for that .. i think looking at it now its like. no its crazxy its insane bc i dont ever want to do it again#at least in the immediate future but watching it back im like ok well.icouldve at least done that better. or tried to loosen up my vp and#made it feel less flat . <thats the devil talking & trying to get u back in on it.thats what i mean liike its fun but its evil and tiring#also im so creatively burnt out ik i couldve done so many fun ciphord gore things but i ug a 'shrug' pff 'shrug' i ?. yk#if only i didnt have the disposition to want to finish everything in one sitting. i think thats why i like static illustration#more bc u get more like. topical variety in a shorter amt of time u feel. anyways i remember hearing this song 4 the first time and in#my need to apply everything ever to my hyperfix i was like omg crop circles soo stanford lol. omg a deal he made when he was young.. & no#it doesnt feel so great does it .. (ciphordd)..then the eyes & fate i was alr convinced but when it got 2 the stanley part ab the taking hi#fathers brothers name i was like ok well fuck filbrick 1 . but rewritten for canon events anyways HELLO???????? AND U WILL DIE THE SAMEE?#much cooler version is still stuck in my head but i hope that u can get the same rudimentary vision i have
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- a rant
no because ive watched this stupid show 5 years ago, and i only noticed this now?? how???
ok. some context first. this is about fox' gotham, a prequel series to batman. or at least a potential one with slight changes. one of those changes is the relationship between oswald cobblepot and edward nygma (spelled with a 'y' for mayhap legal reasons? idfk its silly). whats their relationship like in the show? well...
theyre gay af. idk what to tell you.
okay so oswalds gay as fuck. edwards... ambiguous. totally ambiguous. he had a girlfriend or 2 and a half (kristen kringle, the-woman-who-shall-not-be-named (aka kristen but... blonde? this show is weird), and lee. not comfy counting lee, but technically shes one, hence the 'and a half')! very straight, much hetero (on another side note how tf is oswald the gay one, like i know he wears make-up and shit but eddies all about theatrics and showmanship and flair and hOW IS OSWALD THE GAY ONE NEXT TO HIM?? ok anyway).
so oswald was (is. be real.) canonically in love with ed, ed was.........., and 'penguin in love' is a piece of music composed by david russo for season three in which the whole "im in love with my best friend" thing took place.
that song has been used all over season three, as far as i can tell not once in season four, and once in season five.
.....or so i thought.
because yesterday, while in another obsession phase (of which i get one a few times a year. ive only ever watched the show once, in 2019, when it ended. still dream about nygmobblepot though. i dont dream about media, like ever, but with them, its different), i saw 5x8 to satiate my never satisfied craving of nygmob scenes, obviously skipping the main story bc i dont care about that straight shit. i got to the scene where oswald kills mr. scarface and frees arthur penn from said mr. scarface, after which ed shoots him in the head because thats what one does in such a situation, thought "aw how cute", again, as one does, and then realised.
what was that background music just now? rewinds.... oh. oh haha, its 'penguin in love'. how fun.
WHAT.
WHY IS THAT IN THERE. WHY DID THEY INCLUDE IT.
correction. it wouldve made sense to have it here. they used it in 5x5 for the speech about not backstabbing each other (wedding vows for murderers fr fr), so using it again after their relationship has solidified wouldve made sense.
note how im saying 'would have'.
because it would have made sense, if they used it when ed said "i accept you for the person that you are, just as you accept me for the cold logician that i am. thats why this friendship is great." they didnt, though. they used another equally heartfelt song for that. dunno what its called, it sounds a bit like 'penguin in love' but isnt, not sure if that one has a specific meaning like 'penguin in love' does.
so when was the song used? at 36:08 – 36:17. barely ten seconds, right before eds lines, right before ed kills penn.
...right when penn was sitting in oswalds lap because theyd been fighting for the gun and os fell on the ground.
now. the most obvious answer to "why in the fucking hell" would be because ooh this dudes on his lap so sexy, but no. no. 'penguin in love' is about one specific thing: love. the pure kind. the kind that makes you giddy with butterflies in your stomach, kicking your legs, while youre on your bed, writing in your diary about this guy you have a crush on. and oswald and penn do have history, oswald was more or less fond of penn, but not in love (i mean where would he have found the room in his heart if it was already filled with EDWARD EDWARD EDWARD martin my sweet boy EDWARD EDWARD EDWA-). im also definitely not thinking that penn was so happy about being free from mr. scarfaces influence and not having to kill oswald (oh yeah, the horror. who would wanna kill oswald, the guy with the big ego, who never does anything for anyone without some kind of endgoal- well, unless your name is edward of course) that he instantly fell in love with the guy. i can deal with the homicidal kind of crazy, but that? no. thats where i draw the line.
the next most obvious answer is that it was about oswalds love for ed. more believable, since its what the song was made for, but more believable doesnt mean believable. or likely. because even if i 100% believe that hes been loving this dude for so long its not something he has to think about anymore for it to be true, im pretty sure that itd be very random to suddenly focus on that when oswald was just about to die. so no, even if its what the song is intrinsically about.
so next most obvious answer is- wait. thats it. huh? theres no obvious answer anymore? everything else is brainrot? oh. oh well. its been five years, im sure its too late to worry about it now. what the hell.
im sure you know where im going with this. or maybe not. honestly idk what the fuck im talking about-
youre smart. you know what im about to say. if it wasnt about what oswald was feeling because he was otherwise preoccupied, and it wasnt about penn because that makes no fucking sense, then who was this song used for? who else was in the room?
...oh.
YOU.
YOU FUCKING IMBECILE. YOU STUPID DENSE PIECE OF-
inhale, exhale. no. don’ get mad, you know he cant help it. you know hes totally helpless when it comes to emotions. just breathe. ok.
i hate him. i hate him so much.
if the song wasnt for oswalds sake, it was for his. because i know hes in love with oswald, but does ed? does the producers??
'penguin in love' is about oswalds love. its about his love for edward. its about their love, their relationship. its about edward just as much as it is about oswald.
a-fucking-PPARANTLY, I DIDNT KNOW THAT!! I JUST THOUGHT OH YEAH OZZY BE THE GAY ONE HAHA FUNNY, I DIDNT KNOW IT COULD BE ABOUT ED DIRECTLY!!!
(why am i like this? what is my life? i will never be normal.)
ed has always been the obsessive one. first kristen (and the woman who shall not be named is just an extention of that ofc), then oswald, then lee. and as weve seen with kristen, when hes obsessed with someone, he can become possessive. absolutely not on the scale oswald is on, but still. theres a wee bit of jelly there. oh you have a boyfriend? better get rid of him! oh you wanna run away from me bc i murdered your boyfriend? better keep you right in place and- oh shit did i kill you? ono D:
this is a huge oversimplification, but you get the point. its there. or at least it has to be there because why else do you get so angy that someone is sitting in the lap of your just friend because they were fighting and they ended up in that position totally accidentally? like thats not normal behaviour, for anyone, unless you have possessive tendencies.
i mean its not like penn was a threat in any way. "he wasnt the threat, the dummy was the-" like i understand ed told penn about the submarine which was supposed to be a secret, but come on, like they couldnt make sure penn wouldnt say anything. so why would ed shoot him? its not even like penn was a random dude where that type of thing would be very inconsequential, oswald knew him. hed worked for oswald, and like i said, oswald was more or less fond of the guy. penns just a poor little meow meow, y u kil him eddie? 🥺
unless this fondness was part of the problem. unless ed saw how happy oswald was to see him, got annoyed but let it slide, then used penn attacking os and knowing about the sub as an excuse to kill him. and why would oswald being happy to see penn be a problem to ed? it wouldnt be. it wouldnt be, unless ed thinks oswald is his.
which makes sense. i know im calling him names and calling him out, but like. oswald told him he loved him like 5 times 2 years prior, i dont blame him for believing that maybe theres something to it (especially since that was the point of 3x14, oswald really being in love with him and surprising himself with it). but i thought ed didnt feel the same way? because hes very hetero? because he had a full-on girlfriend before, twice, technically? because-
"the truth is oswald, you would sacrifice anyone to save your own neck. even me."
"like i said! you will always fail, because youll never change."
hm. i know this is a bit off topic, but i just got a war-flashback and... why did ed sound so hurt when he said that? "youll never change." "you would sacrifice anyone. even me." why does he care? they were friends, best friends, yes, but why does he sound like a heartbroken wife who just found out her husband cheated on her again? why does-
"honestly you deserve this. you are opportunistic, your loyalty is.. shaking, at best, and you will hurt anyone, anyone, to get what you want."
"and yes, i was not a good friend. to you or anyone. its why im alone. but i saw you for what you are and i valued that!"
...why would edward nygma, the man who literally said "i dont love you" to oswald, be jealous of even the idea that maybe penn could have something going on with oswald? and why would he act on it if hes usually so careful to not reveal his feelings (unless its about kristen. the original obsession, the american dream, the just be normal, show them you are normal, and people will accept you)? he wouldnt.
unless oswald just told him that he knows he messed up. that hes sorry for it.
and unless that made him think that maybe theres a chance.
"love is about sacrifice. its about putting someone elses needs and happiness before your own."
"you gave up your revenge for me?"
a chance... for what?
"life begins anew."
"shall we get to work?"
and if theres a chance, hes not about to risk losing it. not this time.
so maybe 'penguin in love' is about more than just oswalds feelings. maybe they were trying to tell us that, yes, we see you traumatised gay kid, were sorry this is all we can give you, but here you go, eds in love with him too, but don’t tell the channel. subtlely. just for barely ten seconds. and maybe it can be enough.
nope, it wont be. im gonna sit here crying about the injustice of not having them kiss on screen in the finale as was originally intended for the rest of my life. seriously though, what is this, nbc's hannibal, where im noticing something new details every single time i watch the show, causing me to spiral? no, i was already spiralling. the spiralling was the reason i rewatched the scene. the scene simply made it worse.
so yeah, im done freaking out about a mediocre show that was cancelled 5 years ago and is honestly not worth anyones time (like, its ok. it might even be better than i remember since its been so long. i doubt it. but its ok).
tl;dr: ive only now realised that a specific gay song plays in a specific episode of a show i watched 5 years ago and the only reason theyd include it in the episode is if the dude that was not canonically in love with the other dude was in fact gay, they just werent allowed to make it canon, so they added the gay song to subtlely tell us about it.
have a wonderful day, hellsite. dont do what i did and go crazy about fictional gay people. i know you will though, that’s why im here too. i hate gay people. these two make me homophobic so bad, i wanna gauge my eyes out and skin myself-
#fox gotham#nygmobblepot#i hate my life i hate this show i hate these characters i hate everything#you dont understand they are my destiel#i mean it#they ruined by life#i have literal trigger words that are just about them thats why im thinking about them this time in the first place#that fucking show isnt even that good is just okay like a 3 stars i dont get it why are they everything#rant#technically counts as an analysis. so#series analysis#nygmob#edward nygma#oswald cobblepot#nobody will see this 1 bc i dont have a following and 2 bc this shows fandom is practically dead but it doesnt matter#this is here so that my brain wont explode#i hate gay people
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THEM!!! <3
I love In Stars and Time SO MUCH (I haven’t finished it yet though… but eventually I will!)
And man… I’ve been rotating this story in my head for only a week, but the grip it has on my psyche is just- AHFKSKAKSJFNKJLDLS
The main group of characters have such a fun dynamic and they feel so multidimensional, and, without getting into spoilers too much, I love how the game then completely breaks down these characters. It’s kind of the epitome of ‘under what circumstances would this character do something that initially would be out of character for them to do’ and it’s DEVESTATING!! But in a good and interesting way!
also?? Also?? Such a good game to find right as we’re getting into pride month :33
#in stars and time#them <3#watercolor#traditional art#isat siffrin#isat isabeau#isat odile#isat bonnie#isat mirabelle#I forgot loop :(#I was worried I wouldn’t finish this character line up as I was starting to loose steam after painting 3/5 of them#but I prevailed! And I think I’m pretty happy with how they look in my style :))#hopefully I’ll get around to making more fanart as I had some paintings planned but was struggling with translating art styles#Siffrin means everything to me they are just so <3✨#I’m at act 4 right now and slowly getting through let’s plays of the game#AGH I am also tempted to write a post that’s in depth on why I love this game right now but idk that takes time#I’m so tempted to draw them in color but I also want to keep my fanart monochrome to practice my values and lighting#as well as honor the reason for the game being in black and white
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I feel like Eddie is the type of guy to always have a slide whistle in his pocket and uses it to make incidental sound effects for the conversations that happen around him.
Nobody knows where he gets them all from and they don’t ask incase he takes one out and starts playing with it.
Wayne is so happy every time he loses one of the whistles. He absolutely never tells Eddie when he finds one of the numerous whistles that have rolled under the couch. He has an agreement with Steve to dispose of them secretly and securely.
Except one night when Steve’s driving around town with Eddie, he opens the glove box and there’s a bag full of whistles (seriously nobody knows where he’s getting them from. And in bulk?)
And Eddie is all ‘HEY!’ Which immediately makes Steve tense up in preparation for an argument with his easily antagonised boyfriend about the possible theft of offending musicals instruments.
But then Eddie continues with ‘more whistles! I didn’t take you for a fan dude!!’
And promptly shoves one up each of his nostrils and one in his mouth and tries to play them all at once while demanding Steve watch instead of watching the road.
Steves going to have to think of a new hiding spot.
#corroded coffin DOES have a slide whistle only song#they ALL get whistle solos#Wayne HAS had to deal with hours of slide whistle practice becuase eddie has told him ‘Wayne I NEED to be a master of my craft’#’I mean it’s like telling Beethoven to stop playing’#Wayne doesn’t think it’s like that at all#pre-agreement#Steve comes in to the trailer one afternoon and has to physically shake wayne to get his attention to ask what the hell the shrieking is#Wayne just hands a pair of ear plugs to Steve and points to the couch#the trials and tribulations of dating eddie munson#WEEE guess who originally was only going to post the first paragraph and put everything else in the tags#stranger things#eddie munson#steddie#steve harrington#I’ve got crumbs friebds I’m so sorry
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lately when im doing things that are hard or difficult for me ive been thinking "i wish i was better at this" during or after finishing said difficult or hard task. or "i wish this was more fun" "i wish i could just do this thing" or similar neg thought spirals
ive been following it up with an "and i'm learning how to do that as we speak"
#talking#idk its really helped me actually#like sometimes i get so frustrated cause i like#i JUST want to focus#and im learning how to do that by continueing to try#because being able to focus on things means i can focus on things i like#which is IMPORYANT TO MY HEALTH LOL#so when i try to do things i like and i get frustrated cause i cant focus on it#instead of getting frustrated and giving up#i take a breath and try again. because imLEARNING#everything takes practice#and im learning how to do that as we speak!!
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sorry ik im reposting there was just some things about the orig that bugged me so much
#total drama#total drama island#total drama owen#request#i need to practice drawing him more#like a lot more!!!#he means so much to me#weird how with everything other season i’m like#we’re stickin to the canon design here#but with the original it’s a free for all#sorry about that#trout reqs
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