#[its sadly not a perfect loop.]

[ask-jewels-against-the-sea]

All my fellow pebble enthusiasts shall eat well soon when I'm done.

I'm participating in a map and am about a quarter of the way done with my part (im not avoiding a turnaround or anything haha.. ha....) So here's a little peek before the finished product comes out sometime soon! :]

Also explains why I've been a bit silent again!

[rosyrosethings]

KIng Harry and The Nanny p2

this is part 2 of Harry and the nanny. you don't have to read part 1. This is just another part of the story.

Warning: smut, fluff, blow job,

Harry's heart raced like a teenage boy's when he was near her. Every afternoon, as the children drifted off to sleep, his desire for her became overwhelming and irresistible. He would quietly slip away from his duties as king and pull her into any vacant space they could find - a closet, an unoccupied room - just to indulge in her sweet taste. Even just a simple kiss from her was enough to satisfy his longing. It had been so long since he had felt genuine affection from anyone, and he craved her attention more than anything else. When they were alone, she would always tenderly kiss his head before returning to their daily routines. Harry lived for those moments, cherishing every kiss on his forehead from her. Y/n was well aware of the nature of their relationship; after all, he was the married king and she was only the nanny. But she couldn't deny the intense craving she felt for his touch, his love, anything that came from him.

On this particular Saturday night, Y/n relished in having the day off from her duties and lounged at home with her roommate Bri, unable to shake off thoughts of Harry. Her and Bri set there enjoying there second bottle of wine and each other company.

"Bri its all he doess, doesn't do anything else. He won't even let me touch him." She said, resting on the couch looking at her roomate Bri.

"Maybe he’s like really into pleasing you." She said looking up at her offering her comfort.

"Yea he is but He wants more I could tell. Maybe he just doesn't want me in that way." She said sadly.

"No he wants you. Everyone who sees you wants you in that way." She said looking at her up and down. Y/n laughed

"I am serious bri.." she said laughing

"Maybe hes gay." Bri said, Y/n laughed harder

"Oh please, Bri. He's definitely not gay," Y/n said, rolling her eyes. "You should see the way he looks at me sometimes. It's like he wants to devour me whole."

Bri waggled her eyebrows suggestively. "Ooh, sounds steamy. So why don't you make a move then? Take control for once?"

Y/n sighed, running a hand through her hair. "It's not that simple. He's the king, remember? And married. I can't just throw myself at him."

"Why not? Sounds like he's already throwing himself at you every chance he gets," Bri pointed out.

Y/n bit her lip, considering. "I don't know... What if I'm reading too much into it? What if he rejects me?"

Just then, Y/n's phone buzzed with a text.

‘I know it’s your day off but I need to see you.’ -Harry

‘Is everything okay?’ -Y/n

‘I’m just missing you. I’m coming over now.’- Harry

The text threw her for a loop. Y/n immediately shot up and started straightening up the apartment

“Are you okay?” Bri asked watching her jump from place to place erratic cleaning.

“He’s coming over! Bri go to your room. I didn’t tell him i told you. I was supposed to keep the affair a secret.” She said,

Bri's eyes widened in surprise, her mouth forming a perfect O shape. "Wait, what? He's coming here? Now?" She jumped up from the plush couch, scattering scattered items as she grabbed her phone and hastily stuffed them into her bag. "Okay, okay, I'm going." Her voice was strained with excitement and urgency. "But you better tell me everything later!"

As Bri hurried off into her room, Y/n's heart raced with anticipation and nerves. She quickly smoothed down her hair, checking herself in the mirror and straightening her clothes. The doorbell rang just moments later, startling her.

As Y/n's heart raced with anticipation, she reached for the door handle and took a deep breath to steady her nerves. She swung the door open to reveal Harry standing there, his tall frame shrouded in an all-black ensemble. A dark hoodie was pulled up over his head, casting shadows over his face, while large, opaque sunglasses shielded his eyes from view. Despite the darkness surrounding him, Y/n could still feel the intensity of his gaze on her as she stood before him,

"Y/n," he breathed out, stepping inside and closing the door behind him. As soon as he entered, he shed his hood and shades, revealing his mesmerizing green eyes that seemed to intensify upon locking onto hers. In an instant, he had her pressed against the wall, his body flush against hers. His lips crashed onto hers in a passionate kiss that took her breath away. "I couldn't wait to do that," he whispered huskily as he pulled away, leaving Y/n feeling weak at the knees.

"Maybe we should go to my room, don't want to wake my roommate." She said looking up at him. He smiled

"Lead the way love." She smiled at him grabbing his hand leading him to her bedroom.  She opened the door to her room quickly closing the door behind him. She immediately started to kiss him again. Softly leading him to her bed. She pushed him down on the mattress. Her standing over him.

"Hoodie off." She demanded, he smiled at her attitude. She wanted to please him for once. He obliged taking off his hoodie. Revealing his bare chest. Y/n sat on his lap straddling him.

"I can't wait to have you in my mouth." He said looking up at her. She kissed his lips.

"Not today I will have you in mines." She said kissing his lips again. She felt him stiffening up at her response. Harry was scared. She pushed him down on her mattress as she kissed his neck.

"What wrong? You don't want me to please you." She asked looking at him propped up on both of her hands. Ge saw the disappointment in her eyes.

"No baby, I just haven't had sex in a long time. I don't want to cum to fast. Just looking at you makes me dick hard. I bust just eating you out. I could imagine how it would be inside you." He said, looking up at her. She pressed down her hips to his. Grinding against his dick which was hard already.

"I don't care if you cum quick. I want you inside me I want to see your face while you're deep in my pussy." She said leaning down to kiss him. His dick twitched at her words. There lips moved against one another her hands made her way down his chest. She sat up taking off her shirt.

She slowly slid off of him, her fingers hooking around the waistband of his black joggers as she helped him remove them. Her hands moved effortlessly, unfastening his pants and revealing a pair of gray briefs underneath. In the dim light, she could see the outline of his strong hips and toned muscles, causing a wave of desire to wash over her. She couldn't resist running her hands along his defined abdomen, feeling the heat radiating from his skin. It was as if she couldn't get enough of him, wanting to explore every inch of his body with her touch.

“Gotta get these off.” A mischievous smile played on her lips as she reached for the waistband of his gray briefs. With a teasing tug, she pulled them down, revealing his eager arousal that pressed against his stomach. She gazed at it with a lust in her eyes, knowing that she was in full control of his pleasure. Her hand went him. Harry sighed in relief. Its been so long since he's been pleasured. Especially like this. Her hands went up and down his shaft.

“I’m gonna put you in my mouth now.” Her words dripped seductively from her lips as she looked up at Harry, her hand wrapped tightly around him. A feeling of pure ecstasy coursed through his body at the mere touch of her fingers. She placed a soft kiss on the tip before swirling her tongue around it, sending shivers down his spine. He struggled to hold back, determined not to reach his peak too soon in this blissful moment. But every sensation she created was like fire, filling him with an overwhelming desire for more. Every part of him wanted to surrender to her and fully give into this pleasure that she so expertly provided.

Y/n continued to pleasure Harry with expertise, her lips and tongue working in perfect harmony to bring him to the edge of ecstasy. She could feel his body tensing beneath her touch, his breath hitching with each movement she made. As she continued to take him deeper into her mouth, she could hear Harry's ragged breathing turning into soft moans of pleasure.

"Oh god, Y/n," Harry groaned, his voice husky with desire. "You're so good at this."

She hummed in response, the vibrations sending shivers down his spine. Encouraged by his praise, she increased the intensity of her movements, determined to make him lose control.

Harry's fingers tangled in her hair, guiding her rhythm as he whispered, "Faster, baby. I need more of you."

Y/n complied eagerly, taking him as deep as she could as she quickened her pace. The sounds of their passion filled the room, mingling with the creak of the bed and Harry's increasingly urgent pleas for more.

"I can't hold back much longer," Harry gasped, his hips bucking involuntarily.

Y/n pulled back slightly, her gaze locking with his before she teased, "Do you want to cum in my mouth, Harry?" Her hand still moving up and down his dick.

His eyes darkened with desire as he nodded eagerly. "Yes, please, Y/n.”

“Do it then.” She said, With a sultry smile before she took him back in fully, using every trick and movement she knew to push him closer to the edge. His dick fully down her throat.

As their connection intensified, Harry's moans grew louder and more desperate, echoing off the walls of the room. Y/n eagerly took him in her mouth, feeling his fingers tightly gripping her hair. With one final deep thrust into her mouth and a guttural groan of euphoria, Harry reached his peak. Y/n greedily swallowed every drop, savoring the taste of him on her tongue. He came with such force that it almost overwhelmed her, but she eagerly lapped up every last bit of his pleasure.

As he came down from his high, Harry gazed up at Y/n with a mix of awe and gratitude. "That was… incredible," he panted, his chest rising and falling rapidly.

Y/n grinned triumphantly before leaning in to press a lingering kiss on his lips. "I'm glad you enjoyed it," she whispered softly against his skin.

Harry wrapped his arms around her. Pulling her close to him. He placed a kiss on her forehead. She looked up him as his hand traced her back

“When was the last time someone pleased you?” Y/n asked, looking up at him.

“Well charlotte is the only woman i have been with and I haven’t did anything with her since…”he said trailing off.

“Wait you’ve only been with charlotte?” She asked a bit shock. Feeling a bit like she took something away from him.

"And you." He said with nonchalant ease, his gaze steady and unwavering. Y/n sat up, her heart racing as she looked down at him. His face was a mixture of vulnerability and strength, making her heart ache for him. "But Charlottes more of a just a duty to my kingdom," he continued, his voice tinged with sadness. "My parents died when I was young, and Charlotte was one of the women they had approved of before their tragic accident. I had to marry quickly because of my impending kingship. But Charlotte was never my true love."

He reached out and gently took her hand, bringing it to his lips for a soft kiss. Y/n felt her cheeks flush with warmth at his touch and words.

"But then I saw you," he said softly, his eyes shining with fondness. "You took my breath away. You were wearing a black turtleneck sweater with white trousers and black boots, and a black hat to top it off. It was snowing but you were determined to get a picture of the palace for our social media. I happened to look out the window and saw you, and I couldn't help but ask William who the crazy lady outside was."

A small smile tugged at the corners of his lips as he remembered that day. "William told me you were American and that you worked on the royal social media team. And then I came downstairs shortly after, and there you were - standing in front of the fireplace in Buckingham Palace. Your hands were clasped in front of you, trying to warm them by the fire. Snowflakes were melting off your coat, but I could see your fingers were freezing cold."

His eyes softened as he recalled his actions that day. "I couldn't resist approaching you with a blanket to wrap around your shoulders. And then you turned and looked at me for the first time - our eyes met and I felt something I had never felt for anyone else.” He said, his green eyes meeting hers.

Y/n felt her heart swell with emotion at Harry's words. She remembered that day vividly - how nervous she had been on her first day working at the palace, how cold she had been after taking photos outside in the snow. And then how her breath had caught in her throat when she turned to see the handsome king offering her a blanket, his green eyes warm with concern.

"I remember," she said softly. "I was so flustered I could barely speak. You were so kind to me."

Harry's thumb stroked her hand gently. "From that moment on, I found myself looking for excuses to be near you. I'd walk through rooms I knew you'd be working in, hoping to catch a glimpse. When the nanny position opened up, I immediately thought of you - selfishly wanting you to be around more often."

Y/n's mind whirled with this newfound knowledge. The pieces of the puzzle were finally starting to come together. "So you're the one who recommended me for the job," she exclaimed, a playful giggle escaping her lips.

A warm smile spread across his face as he replied, "Yes, the best decision I ever made."

[hotvintagepoll]

Okay, but now I must know your opinions on Putt-Putt games! (Gotta disagree with you. Putt-Putt Goes to the Moon is clearly the Best of them all)

i haven't played all the games (including Goes to the Moon, sadly), but here are my unfiltered reviews for all the ones I have played!

Putt-Putt Saves the Zoo: a classic. a slowburn. the same every time but that adds to its aura of stability, the old world, a pocket out of time undisturbed. also there are cheese puffs and you can have putt-putt eat them over and over if you don’t care much about saving the elephant

Putt-Putt Travels Through Time: more hectic, meandering, a loop in a loop: the clues ever spiraling outward, the chaos of time unlocked vying with old prospector stereotypes and a deeply inaccurate Middle Ages. a singing hourglass asks putt-putt to resolve reality and he responds “and my homework?” Notable for its wagon wheel fruit snacks (edible if you want to sacrifice the entire old west portion and shoot your gameplay in the foot) and the talking floating lipstick wearing car i had a crush on as a 4 year old.

Putt-Putt Enters the Race: a!!! banger!!!!! yes you get stuck in the vegetable garden too long. yes you wonder why Outback Al, a supposed zoologist, doesn’t know what a baby yak eats. but there’s a cat stuck in a tree and a dog with buried treasure and sometimes the shed is on fire! this is riveting domestic drama and the cherry on top is the number of milkshakes one can order. (a lot.)

Freddi Fish and the Stolen Conch Shell: the most perfect of the freddi games in my opinion for channeling noir coral reef aesthetics into a chiming, dark-hue’d mystery. shady characters galore (also a monkey). an intense climax with true stakes. a squid with a cabaret act. freddi peaks. (the seaweed looks soooo edible.)

Freddi Fish and the Hogfish Rustlers: ok this one kinda beefs it ngl. yes there’s an old timey bar yes you can order a root bear soda. but the vibes? the QUEST? the menace of the deep? lacking. there is one cool part where you can intentionally drown a ship, but otherwise the aesthetic is too brown to really go full High Noon.

Freddi Fish and the Case of the Creature of Coral Cove: the character design in this suuuuucks I couldn’t tell you why I just hate all of them. BUT there is a taffy machine and I love the finale of running around the house flipping open secret doors and bribing dogs, so I give it points for that.

Freddi Fish and Maze Madness: aptly named because this game has been driving me insane for years. I played it last week and I’m still stuck on level 31. what the fuck. humongous entertainment said let’s make a game for 8 year olds so we can really let those little suckers know they ain’t shit because this thing is impossible

[fauxnotice]

ALIEN SKINCARE. v! blue lock/male! reader. originally posted on quotev. masterlist.

CHAPTER I. YOU JUST LOVE BEING NOTHING, RIGHT?

Your daily routine is a terribly ordinary, if not a rather dull one. 

That’s fine, however. Its normalcy comes from predictability, and with predictability comes a sense of control. Every and each new possible variant is easily molded to fit into what is already established. 

Days come and go, much like clouds in the sky, and you’re content. You love your painfully droll, boring routine.

Which would be a lie by definition, so to deny your restlessness would be the same as trying to deny that humans need air to survive. Or to deny that the Japanese football team will never win the World Cup. 

But alas, you live. 

One of your classmates, Hamada, you think pensively, since you make a passable effort at remembering names of the people you have to spend considerable hours of the day with, is acting rather friendly today.

You think he wants something from you. That’s probably why he’s asking you to go somewhere with him after school. Sadly, it seems he’s unaware of the few universal truths of life.

That is that you’re never free after classes. 

Everyone in your immediate vicinity is aware of this, so you’re led to believe that Hamada is extraordinarily out of the loop. Or maybe he’s being a contrarian just to appear unique in your eyes. 

Which is not working, by the way.

“Sorry, but I’m busy today.” You say, an apologetical smile creasing your face in a familiar way. 

“Oh.” He recoils, losing confidence at your rejection. “Maybe some other day, then?”

Whatever. He should just steal all of your money and fill your shoes with nails at this point. He should spit at you and kick you until you’re a stain on the floor. Unfortunately, you’re [L/n] [Y/n], so you nod. Kindly. With all the positive hidden implications in the world.

Hamada regains some of his previous enthusiasm. Thankfully, the teacher enters the room before he could take your politeness as an invitation to further communication.

Like a good student, you listen and take notes carefully. This teacher in particular talks very slowly and often loses track of his thoughts, which greatly gets on your nerves. 

That’s okay. You’ll live.

School time passes by comfortably. You demonstrate your gracefulness and virtue at every chance. Some students swoon. Plenty of girls, and curiously, a good chunk of boys as well. Some scoff at your supposed imitation of perfection. Talk about how you’re probably a faker, eager for attention and praise and whatnot. Not that you mind. They must think about you a lot, enough to start making theories on the topic of you and the nuances of your character. 

Not that they'll ever get any confirmation. You let the invested have fun. Do the divine throw bricks at the religious? No. 

Your school’s football team is having a game tomorrow. Obviously, you make your way to practice. Though, ultimately, you believe you’d be making a better use of your time by trying to fold a thousand origami cranes with just your feet and then wishing for a better team. Yet, here you are.

You move across the field like a corpse. Metaphorically, of course. To the other’s untrained eye, it looks like you’re giving it your all. However, in your head, you’re trying to to remember at least the first ten digits of pi (you’re failing), so you switch to creating a satirical retelling of some subpar movie you and Bachira watched at the premiere some time ago (you got reasonably angry at the mediocrity of the so-called social commentary that was flaunted around as “never seen before” and “a heart clenching story that dives into the complexities of our society”, and Bachira got bored, so you both ditched it, wasted money be damned). 

All that, and yet nothing of worth is happening before you. For shame, since you do think your teammates are decent people, in the same way drivers who stop their cars before they hit you are decent people. Except the probably forty something father of two who let you safely cross the street this morning probably had more ball expertise than these frankly appalling clowns throwing themselves around do. 

Of course, you pride yourself on your ever persisting decorum, so you keep your mouth shut as you pass the ball to the guy a bit to your left, since you’re a good teammate and teamwork makes the dreamwork and yadda yadda. Even with your absent minded play, he just needs to push the ball with some semblance of force and boom, it’s a simple and clean goal. 

But as if by some otherworldly intervention, the boy trips. Genuinely gets sent sprawling over the central object of the game. 

It takes you every drop of self control to not lunge at him with the intent of questioning just how does this happen a day! A day! Before the match. Now, keep in mind, this strange specimen is known for his blunders. At least to you, but the rest of the team and the coach seem to hold this guy in some type of high regard. Which is crazy, since you don’t think he’d be able to score a goal without you specifically holding his hand, making the whole predicament even more baffling since you’re the actual ace of the team. 

Now, you think this team could go places, if you had the time to score more, but you have to spend it making sure your companions don’t sabotage the game by playing like it’s their first time seeing a football. You surely have grinded quite a bit of your teeth mass down by pretending to be content with this charade, just so the court jester of a coach wouldn’t call you uncooperative or something similarly humiliating again. God forbid he sends you to meet the bench. 

The comically incapable guy turns to you, after all the shock and laughter has faded from the group. “Ah, I’m sorry for ruining your pass, [L/n]-kun. I guess my nerves have been getting to me, haha.” 

You wish it was “the nerves”. 

“Don’t worry about it.” You respond, channeling every bit of kindness you could find remaining within yourself. “I’m sure you’ll do fine tomorrow.”

Well, he doesn’t do fine, that’s for sure.

The morning of the next day came quickly. As usual, you woke up early, got out of bed, and went through your usual routine with the goal of looking the best you possibly could, which did turn out to be a rather lengthy process, although that was nothing new. You still thought it was an insanely long and dumb.

What meets you next is the sight of your legal guardian, sprawled across the couch, still clad in her work clothes. You conclude that last night was a busy one, so you sneak past her quietly. Making things worse for her is the last thing you want, after all. 

Next is making a nutritious breakfast. As a product of meticulous repetition, you’re quickly done with it, making sure to leave a portion for Sayaka as well, along with a note about your plans for today.

It’s a nice, sunny Saturday. So, like you always do, you set out on a morning jog. Chiba has quite a few pleasing sights, especially when there are no hideous eyesores scrambling around in the form of people. You specifically pick a time when the crowd’s minimal, right after the early workers leave for their job. Beautiful. The fresh air stirs up every fiber of your lungs. 

All this joy and wonder, you almost forgot about the match that’s supposed to be held in the afternoon. In fact, the memory of that shitshow of a football practice from yesterday almost entirely left your mind. From your increasing frustration, you don’t notice how your pleasant jog turned into a full blown sprint. After a good hour or so of this, you notice just how sweaty you were. 

Gross. You’d have to shower again.

Right as you’re about to open the gate of your residence, a weight slams against your back at full force. You remain entirely unbothered, however, as you’re already very well versed in such occurrences. 

Bachira Meguru has his arms wrapped around your back, clinging onto you much like an eccentrically colored koala. It seems like the fabric soggy with your sweat doesn’t bother him at all. He’s always been a bit strange like that. 

“Bachira-kun.” You smile. It comes easier to you. “Good morning.”

“Good morning!” He grins, lips pulling back to reveal the full expanse of teeth. “You didn’t invite me to go jogging! Again!”

Having a conversation in this position, with your posture being as straight as a tree and Bachira acting as some type of a humanoid backpack or a large parasite, would be inconvenient to most, but the two of you have long made this a part of your “normalcy”. 

“That’s because you’re never awake that early.” You retort easily, with a light teasing tone. “I’m surprised you’re even up right now.” 

“My monster got restless, so I wanted to play football.” He says, like that’s a totally normal thing to say. Like pointing out how the weather is nice or such. 

Listen, you genuinely do like Bachira (as far as someone like you is capable of liking), and you suppose he shares the same sentiment to some degree, because his whole “Monster” thing isn’t something that you talk about with just anyone, unless you want to be wheeled off to the nearest institution and shunned forever. You pride yourself on your patience and understanding, so you tend to brush this topic off whenever it comes up in a conversation. Mostly because you have no idea what to say that wouldn’t be extremely harsh. You want to honor Bachira’s companionship and trust in you, which means that him getting upset over something you stupidly spat out without thinking is not on your to-do list.

You do think that seeing a professional sometime in the future would do him some good, though.

Putting that aside, you nod in understanding. “I see. But-” You poke at his leg. “-Can you get off, please? I want to take a shower.”

Bachira hums a long tune, but he makes no move to do what you’ve requested of him. After a passage of silence, he asks a question, even if he knows the answer already. 

“Hey, can we play together? Just for a bit?” 

He can’t see your face, but he can clearly visualize the apologetic expression that graces it. It looks the same, every time he asks. “Sorry, but I need to save energy for later. Maybe next time?” 

There it is again. Despite it being a few years since you two met, both lovers of football and everything football related, you’ve rejected his proposal again and again. You always have an excuse, something about being busy, or not feeling well, or this and that. 

Bachira has been resigned to it. Yet, he still repeats the inquiry, like you’ll change your mind someday. Maybe next time? As if that will ever come.

He lets it go, as he always does.

Finally stepping down, he leans onto your side. He’s rather sweaty too, you notice. “Right! You have a match today! Make sure to score lots of goals, ‘kay? I’ll be there to cheer for you!” 

Bachira thinks you’re not aware of the fondness you let slip into your gaze. It’s for the best, though, since if you knew you’d probably try to mask it with some form of artificial politeness. He likes you the most when you’re honest, in these small tidbits of time, after all.

“Sure.” You say, simply, as some things are.

The tensions are high before the match. For what reason, you don’t know. The match is purely for practice, although you’re curious on how a low tier school such as Kagayaku High managed to schedule a match against some bigshot from Kanagawa. You’d think they’d consider it a waste of time, but you guess not. 

A notification lights up the screen of your phone just as you’re finishing putting your jersey on. 

Sayaka

I’m so sorry that I won’t be able to make it to your game!!!! Work is hell today 𖦹 ´ ᯅ ` 𖦹

But I hope your team does well! Do your best ৻(  •̀ ᗜ •́  ৻)

You snort at the woman’s usage of kaomojis. It was hard to imagine that she was nearly forty years old. Keeping your eye on the clock, you quickly type a response.

You

Please don’t worry about it! 

Take care of yourself!

Sayaka

You’re too nice to me, haha

The breakfast was delicious, by the way! It really made my day Ｏ(≧∇≦)Ｏ

I’m gonna make us something to eat later, as a celebration and payback! ᕙ(  •̀ ᗜ •́  )ᕗ

You gnawed at your lip worrieldy. While you truly did appreciate the sentiment, Sayaka’s cooking skills … weren’t something you’d write home about. Her message truly left you worried for the safety of the stove. Before you could try to change her mind (and save the neighborhood from a possible fire), one of your teammates gestures for you to move.

Ah. It’s time.

You

The game is starting, ttyl

The match goes just as well as you thought it would. 

The opponent’s defense tears through the clumsy guy like a knife through butter within the first few minutes of the game. They’re not too shabby, you have to admit. But the more you watch them, the more holes ripe for exploatation you notice.

The rush of excitement still evades you, as you circle an opposing player who is attempting to take the ball from you. Your mind is still in its autopilot mode, where you make boring, yet entirely rational plays that have carried your team to where it is now. Move your leg and lean to the right, and when the guy is still thinking of his next move, kick the ball between his legs. A safe and classic nutmeg. After that-

A movement leaves you startled; someone dashes past you with unforseen speed and snatches the football right from your possession. You’re forced to be wide awake, left feeling like a bucket of icy water was thrown over your head.

Huh?

For what seems to be the first time in years, your heartbeat echoes loudly in your ears and shakes your very core.

You gape at the distancing back of the player who had just turned your world around. In bold letters, the name Itoshi acts as a mockery of you. Helpless in your shock, you can do nothing but watch as your newest adversary scores a clean goal into the net, while Kagayaku High’s goalkeeper does nothing.

For once, you don’t blame him.

The clowns of your circus are talking amongst themselves. You think they’re trying to include you as well, but you’re too busy rebooting your brain to care.

You wanted Itoshi gone. An irritation so strong its frightening festers under your skin as you stare, long and hard, at the intruder who had come to ruin everything for you.

But was he truly ruining anything? 

When a teammate of yours moves with the ball, you abandon all uniform strategy. This stupid team could go to hell. Both yours and the enemy’s. This game should be just between you and him. 

Much to the shock of your team, who had probably gotten too comfortable with your usually passive way of playing, you pick up the pace, with the speed and technique built up through many regular torturous sessions of trying to polish yourself to your extremes.

It’s something you had to do, lest you want to be left in the dust when the real threat appears.

Is Itoshi a real threat?

A wispy smile still hangs from your lips. It looks … out of place, possibly, as it’s no longer a carefully planned tool of deceit.

Astonished shouts of your team as you steal the ball from your own comrade is nothing but background noise.

There he comes. His gaze is glacier cold as he weaves between the humanoid obstacles in his path. Surely, he’s wholy confident in his domination of this match. You wait.

Itoshi moves with clear intent of making you crumble under his might. That won’t do. Who does he think he is? Who does he think you are? Does he think you’re a mere bug, a speck of dust on his road to victory? That doesn’t make sense at all.

“Pass to me!” Someone yells at you, as if you weren’t the damned ace, as if you weren’t the one who gave this shitty team the ability to get off the ground in the first place. 

You’re nowhere near the penalty area. The other team’s defense is scattered around, trying to cut off all your routes. Now aware of the possible danger you represent, Itoshi is right by your side, with his eyelash rimmed eyes watching you like he might tear you apart. At least he’s fast on the uptake, you muse, as you almost carelessly roll the ball across the grass.

The angle is terribly narrow, but it’ll do. 

Avoiding Itoshi’s attempt at ridding you of the ball, you raise your leg and deliver a swift kick to it, sending it flying in a rather flimsy arc (your brows furrow slightly at that), which manages to slam into the net at a spot left open.

1-1.

You stop and take a long look at the goal. That was a five out of ten. Hell, maybe even four. But it seemed like it was enough to make your current “rival” appear like he wants to explode you with his mind.

That makes you … giddy? Edges of your lips wobble as you attempt to keep your expression under control. Even if you just single handedly destroyed the foundation of your team as well as the way its members saw you, you still had appearances to keep. From the corner of your eye, you spot Bachira watching, with a grin so manic it bordered on deranged.

In the end, you lose the game. And yet, to you, it feels like a victory, sweeter than any other. You managed to keep Itoshi from scoring another goal (well, you didn’t score another one either, but that was fine), and you got the front seat to the slow unraveling of his stoic disposition.

His team manages to secure a victory with their goal. But their ace, visibly pissed, makes his way to you. His tone is biting, befitting of an untouchable beauty such as himself.

“Next time, I’ll crush you.”

And then he leaves. One for dramatics, that’s for sure. Mommy’s little edgelord. Deciding to play along, you wave at his retreating back, signature smile set in place. “If you say so, Itoshi.”

Pointedly ignoring the troupe of mongrels, you collect your belongings and make a swift departure. Of course, nothing is that simple for you, because Bachira is waiting for you outside. Predictably, he lunges at you, but is considerate enough to take note of your possible exhaustion and not jump on your back like he usually does, instead opting to sling an arm around your shoulders. 

“That was pretty insane, you know.” He begins, although you note the sharpness of his grin that was unknown to you, up until now. “I never knew you could play like that.”

Then, he goes on to speak more, but you’re already ensnared within your own mind. A familiar thing; anger, ire, all-consuming, starts to ignite your entire being. A combination of many factors give way to its rise, both from Bachira’s subtle and probably unintentional downplaying of your perceived capability, and from … well, everything about the game. Especially Itoshi. What, did they all think you were some insignificant ant? A poser, perhaps? Maybe a-

You pause all thought. Suddenly, your legs feel weak. Not from tiredness, of course not. Embarrassingly, the weight of emotions was always a bigger burden than anything of physical kind. 

That was your weakness. A flaw that you needed to demolish. 

“Bachira,” you gasp out, voice small and uneven. “Bachira-”

The boy in question tilts his head. “Huh? What is it?” 

“Hold me.” You say, just before you collapse.

[secretsmutcorner]

Moonlight

1818 words | The dragon’s toy (sequel to Ground down)

Content | NSFWhump (with objects), begging, sleep deprivation, starvation, forced to work, crying, escape attempt, recapture, falling/being dropped, beating, victim blaming, mention of throwing up

Notes | The elf is so brave. Sadly they're not in an action movie but in a whump story.

Taglist | @i-walk-on-the-dark-side @echo-goes-aaa @scoundrelwithboba

Things would not get better.

The realization slowly settled into the elf's bones as each day was as horrific as the last, with never a break to recover, or wrap their head around everything that had happened.

Or even really adjust to the fucking toys the dragon kept shoving into them. Every evening, without fail, when the pain started to fade into being bearable even when moving carefully, the toy they had been forced to wear would be replaced with a bigger one. Sometimes in the mornings too, when the dragon decided for reasons the elf couldn't fathom they were ready for it.

It seemed pleased with the progress they were making, while the elf felt they were trapped in a horrible, never-ending, looping nightmare.

It enjoyed the way they screamed and cried when the replacements happened, too, they were certain of it, though that never seemed to matter in the moment--their pride never outweighed the agony of it. It enjoyed the way they begged for just a little more time to get used to it. It laughed at the way they crawled away, once more barely able to move at all.

They never seemed to get enough rest, not when the pain wouldn't let them sleep half the night, nor enough food--they had, themself, had to carry a fresh bag of food up to the lair from the altar when the time came, struggled under its weight and against their pain, when the dragon could have carried it up with perfect ease. It was, again, plain bread and grain and a few vegetables. Beetroot, which they had always hated, but they couldn't afford pickiness now.

And then, of course, they were expected to satisfy the dragon whenever it desired--which was often. Most mornings, they were awoken by being yanked out of their poor excuse for a bed, dragged before the dragon--or worse, onto the dragon--and forced to perform whatever degrading acts it felt like. Despite its promise to leave their other holes for later, they were sure it pushed deeper into their throat every day; they no longer knew whether it was sore from screaming, or from the rough treatment.

Inbetween, they dragged their exhausted body through the lair to clean. There always was something to do; never again did they dare to steal a moment of rest, even if every part of them begged for a break. Sometimes the dragon watched them move about, always awkward from trying to avoid the pain inside of them, no matter how little it helped. Sometimes it laughed at them.

All in all, there never seemed to come a time when they would be more fit to make their escape.

So they decided that tonight, under the helpful light of a full moon that would hopefully keep them from breaking their neck on the mountain path, would be the night.

They realized they had never been more terrified of anything in their life.

They were so tired. But they could not stay. This couldn't be their life.

The toy the dragon had worked into them in the evening was so large it gave their thinner and thinner belly a bulge. It was unnatural, it was horrible; it was barely visible now, but it would get worse from here on out, they knew it. They were haunted by nightmares in which the dragon had lost its patience and fucked them apart, stabbing right through them, and this? This only gave them more fuel.

The dragon was asleep. It had to be asleep.

Like they had in that first night, they worked the toy out of themself--they couldn't run like this. Like in that first night, it was agonizing.

They felt hollow when they were done, as if the thing had permanently carved them up, left them open to invasion.

They held back sobs, letting their tears fall quietly. Quietly, they put down the toy.

The dragon was asleep. It had to be asleep.

They tried tiptoeing, then found, with all their aches, it was easier to quietly move on all fours, like an animal. What was a little more degradation?

They made it to the lair's entrance.

The dragon was asleep. It had to be asleep.

Before them, the mountainside rolled down, bright ash and smooth coal shining in the moonlight.

If they could make it to the trees below, they could hide. They would be safe.

Their heart was beating so fast and hard it might shatter any moment. For too long, they remained frozen in terror.

Then they escaped.

They wished they could run, but the path was too steep and dangerous for that. Their way down was agonizingly slow, and any moment they feared they would hear the flap of wings. They had to force themself to keep their eyes on the path. If they fell and hurt themself--well, hurt their legs--it would be over.

When they reached the first trees, they could hardly believe it.

They cowered under the thick canopy of an overhanging shrub, pressing themself against its stems. They had made it. They were hidden, they were safe.

Tears burned in their eyes. They would go home.

They gathered themself, and moved to find their way between hte plants.

That was when the stretch of light forest ahead of them burst into flames.

Their hand flew to their mouth to suffocate a scream. The suddenness of the fire left no doubt as to its cause, and now, now they heard the wingbeats. They dragon was circling above.

Smoke filled their nose as they sobbed, barely breathing.

The fire rushed up the slope toward them, and they were left with no choice. Ancient instincts kicked in, and they fled the flames into the open, barren land further up the slope, even as they cried with terror of what they knew they were running into.

They didn't make it more than a few steps into the open before it dove down upon them. Before they could do more than scream, they were grabbed by the ankles and hoisted into the air, the dragon's grip bruising as the earth fell away, away, away.

They screamed as they soared further and further up, from terror and from the pain of being whipped into the air like this.

And then the dragon dropped them.

Time seemed to slow as their mind balanced on the precipice of fainting, and the overwhelming urge to struggle for their life when there was nothing they could do. This was the end-

Then the dragon's claws slammed into their body again, yanking them out of their path to the ground with terrible force. Something cracked in their ribcage. The dragon flipped them around until it had them by the ankles again, and they screamed, they didn't want to fall AGAIN-

The speed and the dark and the terror confounded their senses eonough they didn't know where they were, or where they were going, until they were dropped once more, and this time slammed into the ground after a much shorter fall. Somehow, they managed to cover their head as they rolled over several times. Their whole body most be bruised.

But it was not enough.

The were hit hard in the side, hard enough to fling them against the nearest wall, where they stayed crumpled down, hoping against all hope it was over now-

Something struck them along their whole curled-up body. Then again, and again, over and over until they were screaming, barely managing to intersperse words, "Please" and "Mercy" and "I'm sorry" as if they stood any chance to be heard.

They weren't the awful, but controlled clawstrikers they had suffered before, they realized--the dragon was whipping them with its tail.

And it kept going, until all words had left them, until their voice was hoarse and broken. Each blow slammed them into the rock wall they had collapsed again.

The horrible thought occurred to them the dragon might simply beat them to death.

Eventually, though, it stopped. Every part of them was bruised and battered.

But even that was not enough.

"I was granting you mercy," the dragon growled as they helplessly laid on the ground, sobbing weakly. "But you have lost that privilege."

They had not managed to make sense of the words by the time it grabbed their face, and their yelp was choked off by an object forced into their mouth, forcing their jaws wide--into their throat-

They couldn't even scream as they gagged on it. It was too far in, they had to get it out, their throat was working desperately to expel it, it was all they could do not to throw up--they scrabbled uselessly at their face, the fear of punishment momentarily forgotten over the feeling of suffocating-

The dragon strapped the thing securely in place. They could feel a buckle close too tightly at the back of their head, feel drool already running down their chin. It couldn't stay there, it couldn't stay there-

"Oh, your throat is working. Unlike you when you can get away with it, hm?"

Without further comment on the tears streaming down their face, even on their hand trying to find a way to pull it off their panicked mind couldn't, it pinned them to the ground belly-up once more, and in a moment, they knew what would come next.

This time, they couldn't even scream as their cunt was forced open again, forced to give way to too big an intruder.

They felt a faint spark of gratitude it was still not actually fucking them, and that was almost as bad as the rest of it.

When the toy was shoved in all the way, stretching them past their limits, the dragon flipped them over. They would have screamed again from the way the floor pressed against their bulging belly, pressed against the toy inside them, if only they had a voice. But they were still struggling just to breathe--if only they could beg for mercy, they would do anything, this was worse than everything-

Then their ass was forced open. Another fresh, sharp pain, another intrusion, and they could only cry and cry as the dragon worked yet another toy inside of them, competing for space in their poor abdomen--they could feel it pinch the tissue against the one in their cunt, they couldn't take this it had to go out-

The dragon fixed a chastity belt around their loins. It dug into their nascent bruises, but that wasn't the worst of it.

They couldn't take this-

"There we go. Is this what you wanted, little toy?" The dragon looked down at them, trembling with pain and fear before it, pleading for mercy with their eyes as best as they could.

As if they could ever hope for any.

A terrible grin revealed the dragon's sharp teeth. "You do look lovely, all stuffed like this. I can't wait to watch you clean tomorrow. Now sleep, for however much of the night you've left for yourself."

[suffarustuffaru]

i need to share my very horrible idea to combine the reinhard/julius/otto/subaru boy drama into one julius-centric fic

ok so a little while ago ive made all kinds of ottojuli and reinjuli posts and while i havent finished all my major julisuba posts Yet i am quite fond of julisuba also and i think itd be incredibly funny if you just dumped all of these ships into one story. just go ALL IN on that boy drama!!!! go big or go home amirite!!!! the worlds WORST love trapezoid youve ever seen!!!!

this post is just me rambling fic ideas bc i sadly dont have time for Every Fic Idea and also i just. i just think itd be funny putting multiple ships with the same person in them into one fic. on a serious level its like mimicking real life relationships where sometimes people come and go and you have different dynamics with each person!! on another level i just think this is also very funny so!! here we go. under the cut:

anyway so my idea for this is that you know, julius of course meets reinhard when hes ten and reinhard is eight and then it alters julius's brain chemistry. at first he's in complete awe of reinhard. and then over time the shame starts setting in. that julius isnt as strong as reinhard. and the jealousy sets in a bit too, so julius's got this chip in his shoulder trying to carry his family's legacy and trying to carry the weight of knighthood to be as perfect as possible. to be as close to reinhard as he can. they meet again in their teens and julius shows reinhard the ropes of like basic knight stuff bc reinhard just joined the knights. and of course reinjuli become friends but julius has spent his whole life quietly watching reinhard from afar and now julius still has that distance with reinhard even as theyre supposedly friends now. reinhard is a God, you know? his powers and his leash from the kingdom and his family keep him distant and the two of them are ignoring that. classic homoerotic "do i want him or want to be him" friendship where both of you are too scared to get any closer for various reasons with a Twist (reinhard's very real monster complex that keeps getting validated bc Everyone Around Him thinks hes a monster).

anyway but then julius remembers that you know, shit between reinhard and him wont work out for many reasons, like reinhards family deciding to torment julius at various points in his life (heinkel, whos julius's boss, and reid, who went from julius's childhood idol to. you know.), and also reinhard needs to have kids because hes the sword saint, and also homophobia exists in rezero. and also even if those werent all obstacles julius still has his Complexes connected to reinhard and they got that distance between them so. no go. (repression gets in the way of relationships :((( )

also quick side note is that ex 4 happens and julius reinhard ferris go to vollachia and julius interrupts a meeting with vincent vollachia himself to go "I UNDERSTOOD THAT LITERARY REFERENCE YOU JUST MADE. THATS A REALLY GOOD REFERENCE I LIKED IT A LOT" bc hes a massive nerd and ig this is slightly-more-of-a-disaster-gay julius au so julius is like ............................. vincent was kinda cool for that.

AND THEN SUBARU CRASHES INTO JULIUS'S LIFE and julius is like seeing this guy who's also got a chip in his shoulder and then he insults the knights and says the knights are all depending on their dads (nepotism) and julius is like .......the chip in my shoulder was bad enough and also youre kinda like me fr. and you are clearly a fucking misguided kid so now i have to save your ass. i cant NOT save your ass. and reinhards like "julius and subaru nooo you dont have to do this :((((" and julius cant admit atm that hes also doing this to save subarus life so julius is just like "he disrespected the knights >:(((("

but yes we all know what happened there. julius saves subarus life. julius has to slice subarus throat in that one failed loop. they become friends across several timelines. they also homoerotically share souls, you know, typical bromance things, rivals to lovers except subarus the one going YOURE MY RIVAL and julius is like he is SUCH an upstart. hes really grown on me like a fungus but thats the appeal. and julius i think sees subaru as like a kindred spirit (or at least thats how i interpret julisuba) except subaru is like way more freer than julius is. same desire to prove yourself but subarus not restraining himself constantly like julius. its sometimes to the point of recklessness and general stupidity and what have you, but his boldness and bravery and determination and heart really is admirable.........................

yeah so anyway julius falls for ANOTHER guy again, you know how it is sometimes. the heart wants what it wants and julius is cursed to always have the worst meetings with his closest friends. and of course julius gets heartbroken bc wtf i have to kill my new friend :((( noo!!!! but in the finished loop its like. oh subaru...... hes really improved himself. hes grown so much already. hes kind of. inspirational really. idk how he does it. except subarus you know got that Mystery to him the same way reinhard does (theyre traumatized and Cant Take About It Normally so they just randomly lore drop what they can) and also subarus SUPER into emilia. and julius is like .................... well. subarus taken. haha. and reinhards. taken. fuck me. fuck. and like somethings going on with subaru and rem and emilia right. fuck. and subarus got his whole toxic masculinity / gender crisis..... and he doesnt know hes Bisexual yet...... man. what a loss for julius amirite haha.

and also subarus busy after arc 3........... and julius has no idea whats happening there but that seems Real serious :(( and julius's got other things to attend to so he hopes subaru reaches out to him eventually..... or that they cross paths again since subarus in the emilia camp and julius is in ana camp (and of course reinhard is in felt camp and like that was a whole debacle bc wtf. reinhard, u do know thatd be a big deal to our mutual friend felix?). so. julius pines from afar ONCE AGAIN HAHA.

(also of course subarus still attracted to reinhard here. its um. well julisuba can bond now over pining over reinhard but thats for later also!!)

anyway of course during arc 3 julius briefly runs into some gray haired merchant twink thats being dragged around by subaru bc ana camp rescued this guy from a cave somewhere??? and this new guy and subaru made a deal or whatever so he was just helping out in the background of the fight against sloth??

and whaddya know................ julius goes to drink at a bar bc you know he probably tastes wine for fun in his free time (hes definitely Fond of wine anyway iirc) and now hes Sad over the Ones That Got Away so. bar it is. and gray haired merchant twink is there!! no way. they start talking a bit casually while drinking you know and julius's taste is Unfortunately either the graceful ones (anastasia, because julius has great taste in women) or the cringe fail ones (all the twinks - except for felix - that julius keeps having the wildest first meetings with, because julius has slightly shit taste in men) so julius is like huh this otto guys kinda funny lol. endearing in a weird way!! and -

oops they both end up being a little. they make a little bit of a move on each other. bc they were drinking and got a Bit tipsy. ottos Also not over the one that got away (subaru) (again) and hey. the finest knight truly is. Fine. objectively fine. totally. so you know. things get a little out of hand, maybe they do a bit of cringe fail flirting hidden underneath five million layers of repression and the Horrors of Being Known but ultimately they both embarrass themselves somehow (read: how far they went with each other while under the influence is up to you) and agree to Never Speak of This Again bc oopsies they were both technically each other's first time being Straightforwardly Not Straight with another man. oops. anyway julius has to go back to his camp and otto fucking bolts but he bolts right into subaru and gets his ass dragged into sanctuary drama.

julius is totally not a little bit envious about that.................... about otto getting to accompany subaru to sanctuary... but dont worry julius!! youll get to make up for it later!! bc eventually arc 5 stuff happens. and julius is Glad to see reinhard and subaru again. even with all the Baggage. and subaru is of course Weird about julius but eventually subaru reassures julius after they both confide in each other about the astrea drama (theyre honorary astreas via being dragged into the astrea family mess). and subarus reassuring to julius in a whole new way okay. subaru, whos unrestrained and incapable of being on the down low about anything, and julius, whos always holding himself back with a gazillion layers of repression, starts learning to let go a bit...

but also juliotto meet again. its terribly awkward and they both agreed to never speak of their awkward encounters again. subaru is going ??? and reinhard is clueless. otto then also goes to save reinhard and felt from heinkel trying to take felt hostage, which was also terribly awkward but reinhard and felt are grateful about it (but lbr if reinhard and otto knew each other deeper reinhard would maybe be a little. Apprehensive. around otto while otto would be sympathetic with reinhard bc hes like male emilia). but then while otto manages not to get erased by gluttony....... julius gets erased. of course. which you know results in being forgotten by reinhard in julius's THIRD first meeting ever with reinhard. and subarus the only one who remembers him of course.

then arc 6 happens :,))))) and julius of course has to confront his ideas of knighthood, his identity, his self esteem, and who he is outside of His Name. and also julius gets his ass beat by reid. his childhood idol. who reinhard KNEW was a shitty person but never ever told julius (whether this is because reinhard wanted to spare julius's hero worship or because reinhard never got the chance to tell julius is hard to say lajdsf). but julius does get to triumphantly win in the end!! grow as a person!!! learn to undo a bit of that repression and not hold himself to impossible standards all the time!! hes growing still!!! hes finally solidified his friendships with people like subaru and emilia!! hes remaking his relationship with anastasia!! hes asserted himself, hes planning on going to meet reinhard again one day and duel him!! things are looking up even if its still bittersweet that he doesnt have his name back yet!! does this mean?? perhaps?? a HAPPY ENDING?? julius can have the two men (reinhard and subaru) he admires the most in his life?????? as friends???? or as boyfriends?????? slowburn mutual pining????????????????????????????????????????

and then comes. arc 8 otto. that piece of shit.

julius is very much someone who has to grapple with the weight of the expectations that people throw at him. and also reinhard is someone who May envy julius a bit, but there's also you know, joshua and subaru with the Explicit Envy and (past) resentment because theyre placing heavy expectations on julius!! theyre pointing blame at julius!! julius is trying to find himself outside of stuff like that, especially after arc 6, but he's still got stuff to work on you know? he still has duties to fulfill!! loyalty that he has to act on bc hes gotta help subaru and co in arc 8!! and then in comes otto.

otto is also someone with expectation placed on him, but its Different. ottos mostly a nobody and when hes Not a nobody, his reputation tends to be Derogatory. hes a menace. hes a bad luck charm. hes grappling with the fact that he has to keep being left behind - post-arc 5 bc he was injured, but also repeatedly during arcs 7 and 8 because hes too physically weak to be on the same playing field as emilia or garfiel or subaru on the battlefield. he feels Useless after placing his identity on the expectation that hes Dependable and Useful.

julius is a bit more on even ground with otto now that julius is. also mostly a nobody bc his name is still gone. and also julius had to deal with having that part of his identity crushed. julius tried to be useful over and over in arc 6 only to get his ass repeatedly curb stomped by reid in the beginning. he was a nobody. he wasnt dependable anymore. and also otto is that one guy he had a Passing Fling with over having The Ones Who Got Away and julius was still vaguely hopeful about maybe being pals at least but ottos brushed him off a bit since arc 5. theyre like each others secrets you know? and now otto doesnt know that shit - julius is the only one who Knows - and otto also hates julius's fucking guts now. over SUBARU. and julius has been through this whole rodeo clown circus with arc 3 subaru so this is an absolutely terrible ride through memory lane.

and this is julius's THIRD twink that hates him for terribly unfair reasons. julius is very tired and a bit heartbroken in this au trying to pretend it doesnt bother him. on one level it doesnt. bc ottos pathetic and clearly Overcompensating for Something. on another level it kinda does bc julius had a Thing going with otto. and otto is the complete opposite of julius. like hes different from the other guys julius has liked.

julisuba is about complimentary opposites - they appear Extremely Different at first glance but theyre very similar. theyre people who try to look and act bigger than they are, people who keep reaching to be The Best, to be Perfect, because theyre overcompensating. theyre worried their entire identity is only built off of trying to be bigger than the shadow that other people in their lives (like their families) cast. but they cant reach perfection. and julius is like subaru but if subaru tried to really make himself "refined" - if he tried to stop putting his heart on his sleeve all the time. reinsuba are very similar too. theyre very refined knights who try to keep themselves in check at all times while the weight of the world is on their shoulders. they cant have a hair out of place. except julius is like the "smaller" version of reinhard. julius is less powerful. its like comparing a human and a "god" - reinhard, whos untouchable. but its a double edged sword, because julius gets to be a normal person, because half the expectation placed on him is also purely from himself, while reinhard isnt. reinhard isnt Free. hes on a leash by the kingdom and his family. julius even gets his kind of "celebrity" status stolen from him via the loss of his name. hes truly kind of Normal now - julius is like if reinhard didnt have his crazy abilities and had a little more of a chance to be free.

otto? yeah otto is. very very far from all of that. hes so obviously imperfect that most of his reputation, when its brought up, is just him being known as a mess who's caused various forms of chaos everywhere he goes. either that or hes just. There. Invisible. very very average. and otto is someone who wants a nice comfortable life, someone who wants to fit in - julius and subaru arent Exactly like that, and while reinhard also wants to be normal, ottos the one who has more of an opportunity. but he doesnt. because otto Dooms Himself by being recklessly cutthroat. otto is like if subaru was just. More of an asshole, so ottojuli would just be a rather Extreme Challenge for julius to have to deal with HAH. and normally otto is someone who repays how people treat him - a very "you treat me like this, i'll treat you the same way in turn" kind of deal, except ottos developed a vendetta against julius and its basically like if subaru never let go of his arc 3 julius vendetta.

yes so anyway. etc etc stuff probably happens but i ran out of ideas lajdlfjasdf i just think combining ALL the boy drama and recontextualizing + adding to canon would be. batshit crazy. and terribly entertaining. im so sorry julius but i want to see you crack a bit under the pressure. reinjuli as a ship is like tragic gay yearning that never goes anywhere past being friends with quiet homoerotic tension, then julisuba is. you know. extreme rivals to lovers, starts out Rough but then ends up being super super sweet and theyre Trying their best underneath the self esteem issues. and then ottojuli is. toxic yaoi at its finest (pun intended). you get Every flavor of mlm possible!!

ok so you may be asking "ok what would you even name this fic then" and to that i say that this would be called To All the Boys I've Loved Before.

anyway i really wanna write this idea someday ill inform you guys (if youre reading this and are Interested) if it ever happens :< so. in conclusion this is just julius the entire time throughout all of these events:

[linimoonlight]

Ok so i just saw a clip of eret talking about their plans for the dsmp ending and first of all I KNEW THAT IT WASNT THE NUKE BUT XD WHO ENDED THE SERVER! (I thought that was kinda obvious so it has been my headcanon this whole time)

But hearing this reminded me about something q!Bad talked about a while back that makes perfect sense in that context and makes that ending kinda canon at least for his character! (Not implying that any of the dsmp is canon for any other character!)

But bad was talking about being stuck in a time loop for a long time and i think it was implied that it was connected to the dsmp but i really dont remember the exact wording.

Idk i just think its cool that even if they sadly couldnt play out this ending it still has meaning in q!bads lore!

[absolutebl]

Heyo! I have a friend I'm trying to get more into BL. She's watched KinnPorsche and I recently got her to watch 3 Will Be Free (I know, not BL). She's somewhat picky about the romance she likes to consume, so I thought I'd ask you which BLs you think would be best to get her started with the genre. Her specifications are 1) a good, solid plot (any type is fine); 2) slow burn; 3) and good chemistry. She also loves sci fi and fantasy. My initial thoughts are MoD, Not Me, and AToTS. Any additions?

BLs with: 1 Good Story, 2 Slow Burn, 3 Good Chemistry, 4 PNR elements if possible

I have not one specific list for you, but several! Many of these not updated so likely to recommend pre the 2023 madness. (Imma rag on some of your choices briefly: KP & MoD only satisfy one criteria - chemistry IMHO.

I did give you a final list of winners at the bottom tho!

1) BLs with the best stories:

2) BLs with best slow burn:

3) BLs with the best chemistry:

(by my definition)

4) PNR BLs (paranormal, sci-fi, or fantastical elements)

P'ABL did the math:

BLs that do or should show up on most of those lists:

Dear Doctor I’m Coming for Soul (Thailand) - the first one I thought of that satisfies all criteria. Good story, great chemistry, PNR & slow burn. By your friend's accounting, this should be the perfect BL. I'm a fan of this show and I have a full review here BUT I don't actually rec it often. Why? My quibble with DDICFS is that for dyed-in-the-wool BL or romance fans the ending may not satisfy, BUT that seems to be the one thing your friend is NOT - so this should be perfect.

Triage (Thailand) - good chemistry, frustratingly slow burn, def PNR, and good story. This was my second pull. It suffered at the time of airing from distribution issues and (perhaps more sadly) being up against KP. It's really good tho. A “correct the past” Groundhog Day plot, that has narrative baggage I normally do not like but is so clever about time loops, I have to forgive it my hang-ups. About a doctor who must save a boy to fix reality, but not in the usual way. 

Until We Meet Again (Thailand) - GREAT story, decent chemistry, very PNR, but not slow burn. It’s a perfectly executed fated mates reincarnation plot, fantastic well-seeded twists & reveals, and the only BL I would love to see adapted by other countries or read professionally translated. 

Old Fashion Cupcake (Japan) - slow burn, great story & chemistry, no PNR. This is a deceptively simple office romance that actually has a lot to say about life, love, maturity, and pancakes. It’s charming but also deeply moving and loving in its exploration of what it means to give up, and how connection can bring with it second chances. It’s also beautifully filmed and acted. 

Seven Days (Japan) - slow burn, great romance plot, good chemistry, no PNR. This is a pitch perfect elegant little YA romance that stays completely true to its yaoi roots but neatly avoids all the flaws of the genre. The story is deceptively simple but allows for angst and miscommunication to develop with VERY good reason, and is almost worth studying because of that. As a romance, it is elegant. I can see why it got stolen adapted.

1000 Stars (Thailand) - solid romance, very slow burn, okay chemistry, no PNR. All BL is romantic, but not all BL is a modern romance in the literary sense of the term, but 1k* is just that, an absolutely glorious slow burn gay romance that nods at BL but isn’t behooven to it. It’s just a really well executed linear romance story.

HIStory 3: Trapped (Taiwan 2019 Viki) - not PNR and maybe not exactly slow burn but aces everything else. (This was MY KP when it aired.) Taiwan often struggles with story because their BLs aren’t always long enough to really get stuck in, Trapped is different. It has a baby murder investigation that promotes conflict between the leads, so the romantic tension is between plot and character, it’s so smart. The leads did a GREAT job of showcasing mature chemistry. The side dishes in this series are wonderful too. The main couple has an amorphous ending, but like with Dear Doctor, that shouldn't rank under these specific circumstances.

My School President (Thai 2023 YouTube) - great chemistry, very slow burn, okay story, no PNR BUT you have to like YA. I know not everyone does. This is very youthful. GMMTV gave us a classic high school set Thai BL with tropes like messy boys singing their feelings that made this one Love Sick for the modern age with all the gentle sweetness and pining ache, but none of the dated damaging tropes or issues. Yes, we’ve seen it all before, but I still ADORE this. And there is a lot to be said for the classics being executed perfectly. Who let my BL be this wholesome and funny? Possibly too slow burn for some, we wait many eps for that pay out, and Tin's pining is NOT quiet, but it defines dorky and earnest, so when the payout comes? Lovely.

About Youth (Taiwan 2022 Gaga) - exactly the same criteria as MSP just Taiwan's version. A truly lovely little coming of age high school BL with a classic YA low drama but high angst and an earnest depth. I didn’t even mind the singing, and that’s saying a lot. A weak seme/uke dynamic but tons of BL tropes (both rare in a high school setting but common for Taiwan) makes this one feel both sweet and colored by an almost real world queer authenticity and grit. Full review here.

See You After Quarantine? (Taiwan 2021 Viki) - it's short there isn't a ton of story development, but it's a nice nugget introduction to Taiwan's style. Great chemistry, def slow burn, and CUTE. This under-appreciated gem is Taiwan’s answer to Gameboys and is just as charming and adorable yet still quintessentially Taiwanese. It features a Japanese love interest and the cutest most confused disaster gay. Slow burn because the two have almost no actual screen time together and yet manage some truly amazing chemistry. How does Taiwan do it?

Why no KBL?

Fascinating but despite the fact that KBL tends to earn the highest ratings from me and occupies the most slots in my 10/10 BLs of all time, because they are so short they tend to fall... erm... short in the arena of story and slow burn. Also, until recently, not a lot of great chemistry.

So here are a few others I considered but ended up eliminating for not containing enough of your required elements:

He's Coming to Me (Thailand) - review here

Nobleman Ryu’s Wedding (Korea) - this has a 12th Night meet Cinderfella feel to it, plus some great story tricks like a plot that requires a historical setting (I love it when narrative elements are codependent). 

Our Dining Table - It’s a quiet & cozy little parable of found family alleviating loneliness. Possibly too slow for some but definitely high up there for me with the best of what Japan can do, it’s only flaw (if I dare say such a thing) is that it is not really “romantic.” Lovely & sweet but the romance beats are being used to build a family relationship, not just couple intimacy, it’s OK with me, but not totally BL.

DNA Says Love You (Taiwan) - full review here

Ghost Host Ghost House - if your friend likes horror and culture immersion this might be a winner. Boys shack up with ghosts and each other. The story is weak but everything else is on point and it has some of the best slow burn HOT chemistry ever to hit our screens. No... really. The THIRST is real.

Semantic Error (2022 Viki) - Simple story, no PNR, not slow burn, but for Korea it’s some of the best chemistry the traditional studios have ever managed. It is flawless BL. Truly, perfection for the genre. If your friend doesn't like this, BL is probubly not the right genre. Full review. 

Light on Me - def slow burn but story is a little weak and while there is chemistry, it's not really acted upon. Also v YA and a little stiff. I love this BL unreasonably.

KP not tagged to protect me from the fandom. Don't troll me and prove my point. Remember I can has ban hammer and am not afraid to use it.

(source)

[be-the-glenn-to-my-maggie]

Time travel, it's a funny thing really, even funnier when you take in account all the different interpretations of its inner workings. So, what if we take out boy Spider, and put him in yet another ridiculous situation like we usually do? By that I mean sending him back before even the events of the first film and letting the chaos ensue.

Spider being, well, himself wants to fix whatever he can because he's just built like that. Problem with that is time doesn't like being messed with and will throw hands to keep things as they are. What now? you may ask. Well, Spider is not one to give up easily, he'll roll up his non existing sleeves, put on his game face and.... fail miserably, dyeing a horrible death in the process.

And what now? you may ask again. You're right to be confused, but you're forgetting that there's still a baby to be born to one of the worst of the demons and a pilot, one who is yet to even be called Spider. That's right, this is a time loop.

This one will live trough life, doing the same things as the first one, getting sent back, until he too fails the same way. Then the next one, and the one after that, will do the same, on and on until, eventually, one decides to leave behind a clue for his (future/present/past?) self, just in case. And the dominoes start falling from there.

I won't go into detail of what he does because it would be way to long, but it's basically millions upon millions of tries until he get's to the "golden" run, where he's basically herding people around into "safe spots" without them knowing. Yes, he did throw a fire extinguisher at Quaritch so he would miss Grace's vitals, she still had to transfer but it worked this time (thus Kiri being born, but with her bio mom being alive and well. I leave the rest to your imagination.)

That leaves us with pretty much everyone alive (Yes, Sylwanin is alive. That's how far back he went) and casualties on the human side being kept to a minimum.

All anyone clearly saw of future Spider was the human stranger with dreaded hair, standing over Quaritch's dead body right outside the shack Jake was in ( kinda dark, I know), leading to him becoming kind of his own legend amongst the na'vi (they do figure out he's been helping them all along, their not dumb) This is also why Jake decided to dread his hair, in honor of the stranger who was saving their asses from the background.

Sadly, Spider does die one final time, sufferings from an injury he got while saving Tsu'tey from doing that funny fall. That does fix the paradox of there being two Spiders sooo, win I guess?

After that, everything goes on as normal as it can be, what with everyone being alive and all. They do eventually find the clues left behind by the MANY Spiders and piece together what happened, they don't believe it at first, but all of that, combined with Spider growing up and becoming a spiting image of the stranger leaves them with little else (Imagine learning that your sister, father and a bunch of other important people to you are still alive only because the boy you hate for being the "Spawn of that demon" was sent back in time countless times, died countless deaths, all so everyone else could have a happier life, couldn't be me)

I'm also imagining that Eywa (She's more like a literal goddess here, not full on cosmic being, but enough to see trough time) saw all of it and at the half way point was like "PLEASE STOP! Even one was enough, just please!" all the while the embodiment of Spider's will was cackling like a gremlin " I ain't even half way done!"

Best of all, Miguel O'Hara can't do shit about it (The time loop is a cannon event)

So yeah, that's my thingy to you, a bit long (sorry!) but it is there.

Ooh, well I haven't seen a Spider time travel fic yet, only ones with the other Sully's or with the people from the first movie coming forward in time.

I do loooove a time loop, it's like a little mystery to figure out exactly how the perfect series of events can pan out. I love that Quaritch still dies though, that makes me happy. Spider of COURSE had to throw a fire extinguisher.

I am fascinated by how lonely his time in the past must have been. Especially if he was still a teenage boy. And if he went back as far as saving Sylwanin, dude was like so fucking old by the time they made it to the end there. He was older than Neytiri then so his ass was like nearing the end of middle aged. His bones are creaking their way around the forest. Where did he fucking live, how did he have the supplies to breathe and care for his human needs, how did no one notice him for like forty years?? So many questions.

Also hilarious to imply Eywa had nothing at all to do with this and was just watching.

[deusvervemakesgames]

Project RBH Devlog 0059

The problem has been fixed! The game is working again!

What weird is that I don’t know for certain why this code interaction caused the problem.

What was happening is that I set the player’s depth to change dynamically. What’s depth? That’s the order that GameMaker draws sprites on screen. So if you wanted to stand behind an object and have its sprite obscure the player, that’s what depth does. For some reason, this was preventing the bullets from spawning. Then the code would try to set the bullet’s parameters—things like its speed and damage—at which point, because no bullet spawned, the game couldn’t run that code, and crash. But the reason this happened is because in the function that spawned the bullets, I spawned them using the built-in ‘layer’ variable, meaning there were on the same ‘layer’ as the thing that spawned them—the player or the enemy. But I guess messing with depth on the fly makes that not work? For some reason? Because replacing that variable with the name of the layer that the player/enemies are on fixes the issue? Even though that’s the same layer it should’ve been calling anyway? It’s very strange.

So I celebrated by replacing my most hated placeholder sprite. I bet you didn’t know that there was one placeholder sprite I hated more than any other. Can you guess what it is?

It’s the door. Stupid thin empty doorframe with nothing interesting going on.

So I replaced it with this.

This is heavily inspired by the entrance to Dark Space from the Illusion of Gaia, much like the appearance of Nexus. However, I felt that this might be a little too inspired by Illusion of Gaia, so I reworked it.

Honestly I could watch this thing loop all day.

It’s not perfect yet; I could touch up the animation a little, and there’s a bug where sometimes when you walk away from the door, it skips the closing animation and jumps straight to the closed state. There’s another problem as well. While the animation is fast enough that walking up to the door isn’t a problem, you can dash into the door before the animation has finished. That’s not a big problem though, I’ll probably slap a white fade screen transition on the door anyway which will largely resolve the dashing issue. It’s a purely visual thing.

I also decided to implement a new bullet behavior because I hadn’t in a while despite thinking of this one ages ago.

Bullet acceleration!

Though, I also have a bullet deceleration behavior. Sadly they don’t cause the bullet to start slow, speed up, and then end slow again, they simply cancel each other out. I could probably fix that by giving bullets a maximum speed at which point the acceleration stops applying. It’d probably be a good idea anyway because objects moving very fast don’t play nice with collisions.

Until next Devlog!

-DeusVerve

DevLogs like these are brought to you by Patron(s) like Haelerin!

Support me on Patreon to get Early Access to builds!

[revretch]

Hey! Big fan of your work - I've recently started delving into Blender animation, is there any way you could share the workflow u use when animating stuff?

Of course, but be warned that my workflow is highly idiosyncratic!

First off: Rigging. How I do it depends on exactly what I'm animating. If I'm rigging Sophodra, Gregorsa, or one of the humans, I'll use Rigify, which ships with Blender (though you'll have to enable it in add-ons). It's free, and for roughly human-shaped figures, it gets the job done.

For the other insects, and especially for the arachnids, it gets a little harder. See, arachnid limbs have a lot of joints, and most rigging add-ons aren't equipped to handle limbs more than three bones long--and I definitely wouldn't want to set up inverse kinematics for that many legs manually. So for those, I use an add-on called FreeIK, which you can get on Blender Market for only $30 (but be sure to read the docs!): https://blendermarket.com/products/freeik

FreeIK is amazing! It uses a method called "ephemeral rigging," which lets me pin any bone in place whenever I please, making it much more like animating a puppet and allowing a much finer level of control than traditional rigs. Sadly, that can be a little too much control on some model--hips on humanoid rigs will shoot out at random. For something like a spider, however, it's absolutely perfect! (I recommend using it in tandem with Selection Sets, another add-on that ships with Blender, to keep track of which bones you want pinned.)

Moving on from rigging, I also use an add-on called Onion Skin Tools. This one is only $10 on Blender Market: https://blendermarket.com/products/onion-skin-tools

As the name suggests, it lets you use onion skinning like in 2D animation. I couldn't imagine doing a walk cycle without it! With its help, I'm easily able to make a repeating walk cycle that loops in place while I move a parent empty around. (And if you're using FreeIK, you'll definitely want to be using a parent empty for placement. It's powerful, but bones can start behaving unpredictably if you get too far from the model's origin. I use two nested parent empties--one for walking, parented in turn to a master empty used for general placement.)

As of work on episode seven, I've also start incorporating Grease Pencil. Grease Pencil is an excellent tool all around, allowing you to do 2D animation in Blender! My style is cel-shaded enough that I can combine it with 2D. Not only do I use it for storyboard reference, but I also use it to draw on top of the scene, for where the 3D just isn't cutting it. I import the storyboards and other drawings with an add-on I made myself--Blender by default only lets you import black-and-white shapes, but my add-on imports as strokes, and can handle color: https://github.com/revereche/lineart_to_gp

I've also started incorporating AnimAll, which is fantastic (and also ships with Blender!). Shapekeys are already powerful tools, allow you to tweak the mesh manually when the rig isn't doing what you need. AnimAll lets you give each Shapekey multiple frames, so you don't need to set up a ton of Shapekeys to do one complex chain of movement. (Be warned it can cause file bloat, though, so use it wisely!)

As for the workflow itself, I go in this order, more or less (after writing the script and making any needed model adjustments, of course):

1.) Storyboarding. Since it's just me, they don't need to be great quality. The most important thing is making sure of the placements, getting the poses down in gestural strokes, and most importantly, getting the expressions just right.

2.) Recording voices. This can also be done before storyboarding, but I like to be sure of the scene flow before I commit. I used to start with rough placeholder voices, but ended up with awkward timing when the length of the final lines didn't match the original well enough. (Good thing none of my characters lip sync!) So, now I do the final audio on this step.

3.) Staging. Previously, this meant eyeballing the storyboard while I roughly placed the characters in the scene. Now, I import the storyboards in a Grease Pencil parented to the camera, so I can pose the characters to the storyboards more precisely. It preserves vivid gestures that would be easily lost in the CG stage otherwise!

4.) Props and backgrounds. Sometimes, I put this off until after animation, but it's really best to do it now. This can be mesh objects, planes I've painted on--or, often, planes I've painted on and extruded partially into mesh. I like to use Geometry Nodes for mesh wherever possible, especially when instancing many objects! It makes dealing with tons of vines (and humans) much easier. Also experiment with Shader Nodes, since generated textures are crisper than you would get with anything but very large texture images. (And if you're using Cycles, don't overlook displacement! Though you'll have to remember to turn that on in the sidebar preferences. That said, I mostly use Eevee, but am starting to look into Cycles for backgrounds.)

5.) Finally, final animation! I've already put the rough poses down, so I begin by cleaning those up, then adding any needed transitional poses. Then, I manually tweak the speed of the tweening, and offset the movements of parts that drag or bounce more than the rest (e.g. antennae). When a character needs to stand mostly still, I'll add a very slight bob for a moving hold, so they don't look like a mannequin.

After this, I render the image sequences, then put them all together in a video sequencing file. There, I add the citation blips, credits, and Gregorsa's Notes, as well as do some editing in post. Then, it's time to render the final video!

Hope that helps. I wish you luck in your future Blender endeavors!

[metalsonicreblog]

* Spoilers for Bendy and the Dark Revival

I did not have high hopes I'm terms of story, and sadly I was right. BATDR is one of the most 'okay' games ever, especially its ending. Very overwhelming.

So apperantly everyone in the studio is just, not real I guess? Henry is just a thing Joey made to torture. I don't know why this was the direction they took. Kind of thought there was importance of them setting up how a soul works, and how that a toon needed one to be perfect. But I guess Ink Demon can just, do that now?

Which I really did not get. I predicted it. I predicted a lot of these plot points, but. How is Ink Demon able to switch between Bendy and Ink Demon. Is Ink Demon aware of this- is Bendy aware? Is it just that Bendy is just a little guy and than suddenly morbs into Ink Demon. Like a werewolf or something. Never really explained!! At all!! Like a lot of things!!

There was like, only two letters from workers from the studio from BATIM. I kind of felt a whole lot of, no character anything? Like the only characters who are developed are Audrey and Joey. What is Allison even doing. Why was her reason she can't let Audrey come is Tom. When later you can pet Tom.

Did I mention that this game ends like how Mario Odyssey's ending is. If you know you know.

I kind of thought we'd get more of the cult, but Sammy shows up for 0.03 milliseconds before dying. Henry has a model now which is cool I guess.

The game play is also a whole lot of nothing. There is like no enemies ever besides some lost ones. Didn't think we'd actually only see the butcher gang only once. And only seeing our first searcher way into the game. I understand not wanting to overwhelm the player. With how many enemies there can be sometimes in batim. But pretty sure everytime lost ones appear they just almost immediately are too much. I understand no boring puzzles or what not. But during this nothingness I wish we had character moments. Because there is almost no character.

I like the implication that projectionist dies every single time loop. Lmao

I felt like the plot was kind of picking up during Susie's section. But then I realized the games almost over and it has to end somehow. And it just resumed to being a whole lot of nothing happening.

[anueutsuhos-touhou-profiles]

Junko:

Bottom left image by Raptor07. Bottom right image by Melon22.

Junko. She has no title. She has no last name. She is only Junko, "Pure Fox". That said, she is not a fox youkai, that's just a motif. She was once a Lunarian, but now she is a one of a kind being known as a "sagacious spirit". What that is, even she doesn't know.

Junko has the ability to purify anything. This isn't purity as in "devoid of Kegare", but rather, think of it as removing the impurities in metal. Or it might be returning an object to its godly state, before it was given a name and limitations. So, you could say it's an ability to perfect anything.

She lives for the goal of killing Chang'e. Who is Chang'e, you may ask? She's effectively the Chinese equivalent to Kaguya. Only, instead of being banished from the moon, she used to live on Earth and was banished TO the moon. She and Junko had the same husband: Hou'yi, the legendary archer. Then Hou'yi murdered Junko's son, Bo'Feng. Understandably, Junko was absolutely pissed off. Junko successfully killed Hou'yi in retaliation, but Chang'e escaped. This was thousands of years ago, and Junko's rage has still not been sated. She has made countless attempts on Chang'e's life, but to no avail, as Chang'e is immortal.

Sadly, in the millennia since, Junko has purified her mind of most of her memories. She might not even remember her son anymore. Junko isn't even her real name, which is lost to time. It's gotten to the point very few people know the original Junko, and there are many inconsistent stories surrounding her. Sometimes she and Chang'e are the same person, even.

Still, she's very polite and affable to anyone not named Chang'e. And maybe she'd be polite to Chang'e too but we've never seen them interact. Despite her neverending rage, she is almost always seen smiling and calm. Basically, her anger has looped around to the point she's never angry.

She's not mindless either, she's a cunning strategist, and just because she lives to hate Chang'e doesn't mean she can't take a break and do other things every now and then.

Junko appears as the main villain and final boss of Touhou 15: Legacy of Lunatic Kingdom. Her latest plan to kill Chang'e wound up causing the events of the previous game, and the game after this one. Her plan was this: Send fairies from Hell throughout the moon, using her ability to purify them into embodiments of life and death itself. This would scare away the Lunarians, and then she would shoot down Chang'e while she was escorted out.

She didn't expect to be confronted by a human, however. She was encountered at the Mare Tranquillitatis, the sea of the moon, which is portrayed in Touhou as an actual ocean. She announced the final battle with her now iconic line: "Chang'e, are you watching?" She was defeated this time, but she didn't give up yet: she had a trump card: an assassin of immense power sent into the Dream World to kill Chang'e. She teamed up with this assassin to fight the protagonist one last time in the Extra stage. Ultimately, she was defeated again, her rage was sated for the time being, and she withdrew peacefully.

She had nothing but respect for the protagonist despite them foiling her plans, as she realized they hated the Lunarians not much less than she does; they were only fighting to save their home. The protagonist, in turn, also sympathized with her over the Lunarians.

Most interestingly, Junko does not hate Reisen Udongein Inaba for her past history with the Lunarians, as Reisen proclaims herself to be an Earth Rabbit now. Junko's even been said to have "taken a special interest in her", whatever that means.

Despite being the main villain and final boss of a Touhou game, Junko has seen a suprising lack of screentime, perhaps having the least reappearances of any main villain of the Windows era, with Utsuho being a distant second place.

However, Junko did return in The Grimoire of Usami. She was present in Shinmyoumaru's hijacking of Reimu's fireworks festival, but Shinmyoumaru didn't invite her. As it turns out, Shinmyoumaru invited Clownpiece, who in turn invited her master Hecatia, who in turn invited Junko. Junko made a big show, taunting the audience and claiming they needed to realize their own mortality and bow down to her power... but quickly revealed this was an act, and considered it just harmless fun. Except without the harmless part. Junko's pure danmaku was so lethal that she was too much for Reimu and co to handle, so Yukari Yakumo had to step in to keep Junko from wiping out the audience. Still, she was very popular with the audience for that very reason.

Junko's spellcards are all as minimalist as possible. Most of them are wave upon wave of simple blue orbs. In some cases they're red and purple curving lasers. They seem to be designed to kill, not to look pretty. She's even made a spellcard that's literally undodgeable unless you can teleport! Still, her using them against you does not mean she hates you: according to her, this are spellcards in their purest form. These spellcards have names such as "Simple Danmaku for Cornering a Trapped Rat" or "Trembling, Shivering Star".

One spellcard of hers that is rather unique, though, is "Lillies of Murderous Intent": she throws grey orbs at you that hit the edges of the screen and explode into beautiful bursts of massive, curving red laser beams.

Oh, yeah, Junko's arch-enemy, Chang'e? She never appears onscreen. She's apparently a prisoner of the Lunarians now. Despite this, she's beloved by the moon rabbits, who pound mochi in her name on a regular basis. We don't know what she thinks of Junko, or how she feels about her hand in killing Junko's son.

Oh, and those purple flames on Junko's back are supposed to reference the nine tails of a mature kitsune. From heron out every final boss will have flames out their back like that.

[disasterdrvid]

What are your top 10 video games?

Thank u @shift-shaping for the tag!

I'm tagging @localfruit @star--nymph @wardenrainwall @full---ofstarlight @perfectblve @sneklesbian @magic-space-games @notebooks-and-laptops and anyone else who wants/I may have forgot to tag <3

These aren't in any particular order tbh

Dragon Age: Origins

Genuinely this game has some of the best writing in the series and really wants players invested in their characters as character origins intersect with the main plot. Inquisition was my first DA game but Origins rewired my brain chemistry.

2. Pokemon Soul Silver

Not my first Pokemon game nor my most recent but it was the one that came at a pivotal moment in my life. Many weeks of coming home from middle school and ignoring my homework to run around in the game.

3. Stardew Valley

Absolute classic and one I consistently go back to. Sometimes I need to turn off my brain and yearn for the mines.

4. Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom

I was never a Zelda person growing up, but I picked up BotW this year in time to play TotK. Oh my god, this game made me cry multiple times with it's lovingly-crafted story. I love the act of exploration in this game and it's encouragement to find multiple solutions to the same problem. Truly one of the best games of the last decade.

5. Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion

This game is such a mess and I love her dearly for it. It's character creation and leveling system is one of my favorite in any game and I'm very glad traces of it exist in Starfield (I'm not playing but my brother is and there's a lot of Oblivion love in it).

6. Cult of the Lamb

A very fun gameplay loop and roguelike combat make this super fun to replay. I don't come here for in-depth story (I've compared it to Happy Tree Friends in that regard), but I love the cult creation and maintenance.

7. Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning

Underrated game of all time. It shows it age and there's elements of the story that don't work great but dear god I love it and I'm forever sad no one plays it. Lots of Irish folk inspiration, which I think would draw more people if they knew that was there.

8. Baldur's Gate 3

For context, I haven't actually been able to play but I've been consuming a lot of content for it so I know its up my alley. (My PC would explode bc I don't have the specs and it's not coming to Xbox for a bit 😭) But I love the characters and the DnD aspect so much.

9. Mass Effect

I'm not huge on shooters but the first Mass Effect really drew me in with its story. Not a perfect game by any stretch. However, it still feels fresh and new even now.

10. Tetris

Finally, original Tetris. Love me some shapes. First game I ever played because my mom had an old school Gameboy from before I was born that she handed down to me as a kid. Sadly can't play it on the original hardware (I still have it and it still runs!) because the screen is dogshit and I can't see, but luckily there's more places to play it now.

[umbry-fic]

new Paradise(memory = null);

Summary: She awakens from emptiness, and witnesses a God descend.

Fandom: Arcaea Characters: Hikari, Tairitsu Relationships: Hikari/Tairitsu Rating: T Word Count: 2603 Mirror Link: AO3 Original Post Date: 25/06/2023

Notes+Warnings: This is a canon divergence fic that contains spoilers for Final Verdict and Silent Answer! It's basically Silent Answer Ending A but two steps to the right. It's not a happy fic, and there is no happy ending here.

~~~

Awareness tugged at the threads of her mind, sluggishly pulling her from the empty void upon which she had floated - for how long, she did not know. Back into the world of the living, where she struggled to open heavy eyelids, a whisper echoing in her head, telling her that she had to wake up.

The world that met her was far too bright, a blinding white that seared itself onto the backs of her eyelids when she screwed her eyes shut instantly, wondering if she could sink back into blissfully quiet darkness.

An icy hand closed around her heart, sharp icicles digging into her flesh, refusing to let her slip away. The whisper had sharpened into a scream, one that she knew wouldn’t go away even if she clapped her hands over her ears - it had embedded itself deep in her mind, grating against its edges.

Continuously, as if stuck in an endless loop, it implored that there was something she had to do. Surely, she must exist for some purpose, and it was her responsibility to discover what it was.

But how could she ever do that when she couldn’t even recall her name, her mind a barren expanse that yielded nothing?

“You’re awake.” The words were muttered in a quiet voice that brushed against her skin, finally quieting the maelstrom within her head. In the silence that pressed upon her shoulders, she opened her eyes once more.

Who am I? was what she wished to ask. It was a sensible question that would give her one of the most critical puzzle pieces needed to fill in the gaps.

“Are you God?” was what slipped from her instead, a girl with no name and no purpose, staring in awe at the figure looming over her.

What she had thought to be the sky revealed itself to be infinite panes of glass, rotating in place, their edges catching the light. They broke apart, gathering together to form flocks. Like birds, each with their own personalities - some skittish and skirting away, some daring and swooping through the air. All clearly under the command of the figure that was the centre of it all - a girl clad in elegant white, hair seeming to float around her knees, piercing pink eyes trained on her.

With but a single wave of the other girl’s gloved hand, all the glass seemed to lose their life, raining from the sky to fall like downed birds upon the ground below. A dizzying display of power that made her heart pound in her chest.

Something told her that if the other girl wanted, she could control this entire world - make it bend to her every whim, reshape it to her very image. Then wouldn’t it make sense for her to have created this physical form she now resided in? In the same manner that Prometheus had moulded men out of clay, before Athena had breathed the gift of life into them.

The other girl came closer, hands clasped serenely before her, her pink eyes boring into her own, sending shivers up her spine. Something lurked in their depths, something that she could not discern.

“No, I’m not.” She smiled sadly, kneeling next to her. A God, fallen from the Heavens, lowering herself to the level of mortals. Perfection, lovely in its magnificence, and equally as deadly. All that broke that image of perfection was a lone black ribbon, tied into a sloppy bunny-ear loop that drooped against the side of her dress. An anomaly that she so wished she could delve into and pull apart.

“My name is Hikari, and yours is Tairitsu.”

Every word that fell from Hikari’s lips pulled taut the invisible string that connected them, dragging her closer, close enough that perhaps they might become one. She could not help but swallow, her throat suddenly dry, utterly still as a hand cupped her cheek, stroking softly.

The spell broke when Hikari’s hand dropped to curl around her wrist, bidding her rise on wobbly legs. She rolled the name she’d been given around in her mouth, contemplating its shape. It seemed right, even if her memories were still but a blank, locked behind a door that her name did not unlock.

She gasped, as all of a sudden Hikari’s grip tightened, nails digging into her skin. Not waiting for her to start walking, the other girl stalked away, forcing her to stumble forward or suffer a painful fall.

“Let’s go.”

It was not a suggestion. It was a statement, a declaration of will that could not be shattered.

Without a word, Tairitsu followed.

~~~

Spending every moment with Hikari became her entire life. All that it was, and nothing more.

It was not a bad life to lead, not by any means. She was never alone, her and Hikari’s fingers interlocked as they wandered this strange world that was devoid of any life but their two flames, flickering lonelily.

They would sit on the edges of crumbling ruins together, staring out over emptiness, Hikari beckoning for her to rest her head in her lap. She would acquiesce, her eyes fluttering shut as a gentle hand ran through her hair.

Occasionally, Hikari would pull down a shard of glass and stretch it into a doorway, taking her hand and leading her through. Guiding her to explore memories of other worlds, bright colours that could never appear in their world of glass seeming to pop around every corner, vibrant and beautiful. Only in moments like these would the stiffness in Hikari’s shoulders fade away, the restraint that she always possessed fading away to reveal an excited child that could light up Tairitsu’s heart whenever she broke into a smile.

When night fell, they would lay next to each other on the ground, Hikari’s arm inevitably wrapping around her waist and holding her close, until she drifted away surrounded by warmth, quieting all the thoughts that swam in her head. Once morning broke, she would retie the ribbon on Hikari’s dress, chiding her for not learning to do it herself. Hikari would chuckle, whispering that she would always have someone to help her, the words never failing to bring a flush to Tairitsu’s cheeks.

It was a peaceful life. One that sorrow could not interrupt, where tragedy was but a faraway dream. It was a life that could go on, unerringly, for all eternity without interruption.

Perhaps another person would be satisfied with this. A paradise where one would be forever protected, where one’s vulnerable heart could never be broken.

Yet she could not hide behind an illusion, pushing away all the inconvenient facts she did not want to see.

Hikari never fully let her guard down, always on alert for threats that may not even exist, the shards of glass that followed her everywhere sharpening into a javelin at the most minute of sounds. If Tairitsu strayed out of her sight for even a second, Hikari would materialise right next to her, scaring the very soul out of her body. What followed would be a cold fury that Tairitsu was sure swept out across all the land, freezing the blood in her body and causing her breaths to quicken. It was a wonder that they did not crystallise upon leaving her.

Sometimes, she would awaken to Hikari watching her, that same unknown thing from before swimming in her eyes. And then her expression would shutter, returning to neutrality.

No matter what, though, any question Tairitsu attempted to voice crashed into a brick wall, making no progress. Hikari refused to answer anything, the glare she shot Tairitsu’s way enough to get her to clam her mouth shut.

And on nights when she couldn’t find the solace of sleep, the thoughts running round and round in her head intensifying to a cacophony… She would stay completely still within Hikari’s embrace, gaze fixed on the ribbon she had helped tie that very morning, a replica of the one on her own dress.

~~~

“Hikari? What do you think of the truth?” she asked, hands clasped in her lap to hide the tremble of her fingers.

“Whatever do you mean?” Hikari replied, her fingers, which had been drumming on her thighs, coming to a pause.

“Do you think the truth is the most important thing?” She pushed forward, desperately trying to ignore the terror that occupied her heart - a nasty, scaled beast that only grew stronger with each second. Despite Hikari’s claim to the contrary, she must surely hold absolute dominion over this world, able to control every facet. If such was the case, she could cease to exist at any second, if Hikari so willed it.

But she did not look away. To do so would be to admit defeat, and she could do no such thing. Not just for her own sake, but for Hikari’s sake as well.

“Wouldn’t you say happiness is the most important thing?” Hikari said softly, stilling completely. “If you’re happy, who cares about the truth?”

“I…” She bit her lip hard, tasting iron against her tongue.

“If the truth threatens my happiness, then I will not hesitate to destroy it.” Hikari’s gaze rose to meet hers. Cold and empty once more, lacking any of the gentle warmth that was usually directed at her. Glass swirled around her like a typhoon, some pieces shattering into dust beneath the weight of her rage.

The warning in those words was crystal clear.

And she heeded them, dropping her gaze, not wishing to suffer the same fate.

~~~

She needed to know. No matter what she did, the doubts, the questions, refused to quieten. Who was she, really? Why did some of these places, some of these paths, seem familiar to her? Why were there echoes of thoughts, of distant emotion? Like starbursts behind her eyes, whispers of rage that almost keeled her over, before Hikari’s caring hands brushed them all away.

And it wasn’t just for herself. She wanted to know, so that she could understand why Hikari was so shrouded in sorrow. She wished to close the abyss between them and truly embrace the other girl - soothe the pain that festered in her heart, and allow happiness to truly take root again.

She could not simply forget, could not give up the past and live only in the present, thinking not of the future, as Hikari wanted. Even if time’s flow could not be reversed, she couldn’t give up.

In the dead of night, when the world slept soundly, she untangled herself from Hikari, staring down at her sleeping form. She seemed so peaceful like this; every crease of her brow smoothed away, making her seem far more youthful.

Whispering an apology within the safe confines of her mind, unable to risk saying it aloud, she scrambled to her feet, tiptoeing a distance away before she began to move normally. Really, it didn’t matter. Hikari must be able to see across this entire world. How else did she always find her so quickly?

Her only choice was to get back before Hikari stirred. Whether she bypassed detection, whether she was caught… It mattered not. It all ended tonight.

She didn’t have a destination in mind. She simply followed her buried instinct, letting it drag her in one direction, a thread tied tightly around her finger.

It didn’t take long before her path was blocked by an invisible wall that rippled when she poked it, revealing itself to be an impenetrable wall of glass. Almost certainly set up by Hikari to hide an ugly truth behind it. The closer she had gotten, the more goosebumps had risen on her arms, nausea rolling over her as she swallowed down bile.

Pulling upon the thread that extended into herself, she focussed, gritting her teeth as she savagely tugged against the resistance barring her way. Tearing and tearing, forcing her way through sticky honey until the glass yielded to her control, a hole ripping open in the wall, large enough to glance through.

Within were the nondescript ruins of a church. The walls were crumbling, lone pillars stabbing into the sky. The roof was torn away entirely, surely in some epic struggle, random stones strewn across the ground.

Haunting, certainly, but what -

A wave of raw emotion forced her to her knees, the deluge of memories slamming into her enough to make her scream in agony, her heart feeling like it was going to rip apart. Images flashed through her mind in rapid succession - sitting in the pews of the church facing Hikari’s hopeful smile, hope that soon soured into angered desperation, a frenzied battle over earth and sky, and a sword -

The same sword that now pierced through her stomach, bringing her recollection to a screeching halt.

Reaching a trembling hand to the tip, she glanced down at her wound. There was no blood, just as there was no pain singing through her body. Only cracking glass, rippling outwards from the wound.

It answered all of her questions.

“I suppose, no matter what I do, you’ll always want to know the truth. But I cannot let you remember your hatred of me,” Hikari murmured, genuine sadness painted over her face as she let go of the sword’s grip, letting it dissolve into glass that returned to the sky. She caught her failing body, all strength fleeing from it as she collapsed.

I… I wouldn’t have…

“That’s just you, and I do love that. No matter how many times this must happen.” A gentle hand cradled her face, another reaching to undo the ribbon tied to her chest as lips brushed against her forehead.

With the last of the will she could gather, she reached out a hand that was nothing more than fractured glass, grinding together. Trying as hard as she could to cross that abyss that had divided them this whole time, now that she was so close, finally within reach…

I just wanted… To save… You…

She wheezed, unable to form the words, the consciousness that had been formed from wisps of a soul and tied in place by a fragile body made of lies beginning to escape now that its vessel had been destroyed. Dissolving into the sky, as all that she was vanished.

And then there was nothing but blissful darkness.

~~~

Awareness tugged at the threads of her mind, sluggishly pulling her from the empty void upon which she had floated - for how long, she did not know. Back into the world of the living, where she struggled to open heavy eyelids, a whisper echoing in her head, telling her that she had to wake up.

The world that met her was far too bright, a blinding white that seared itself onto the backs of her eyelids when she screwed her eyes shut instantly, wondering if she could sink back into blissfully quiet darkness.

“You’re awake.” The words were muttered in a quiet voice that brushed against her skin, imploring her to open her eyes once more.

Who am I? was what she wished to ask.

“Are you God?” was what slipped from her instead, a girl with no name and no purpose, staring in awe at the figure looming over her.

The other girl stayed silent for some time, contemplating her answer, a smile slowly spreading across her face. One that could be described as serene, if not for the terrifying emptiness that yawned in her eyes.

The shards of glass in the sky rained down like feathers, forming the wings of a glorious angel behind her, two black ribbons fluttering on the sides of her dress.

“Yes, I am.”

[fallowhearth]

I'm enjoying Nebuchadnezzar but there are some significant mechanical changes from Pharaoh. For one, we no longer have walkers who will randomly roam all accessible paths, but player-defined routes. This hugely changes the building layouts you need. (And sadly makes the blocks I've had memorised since the early 2000s less than useful.)

Just as some context, this is my beloved Flexi-Block in all its original forum glory. I found this via a more recent Reddit post, and I'm so glad I did, because it's the page I referenced at the time. I also had a small notebook where I'd copied down relevant details (ie total number of path squares a particular kind of walker could walk before returning home, that sort of thing) from various fansites that I could reference while playing.

Unfortunately some of the images have died in the meantime. It's so lucky the forum used its own system for showing building layouts, as these were modular and based on a shared library of images.

The basic layout with paths and entertainment venues displayed. This could be laid out according to available space as long as the area squared within the path was preserved. The block would be stoppered with a roadblock, preventing radiant walkers from leaving the set loop.

This is what it looked like with fully upgraded housing. The houses around the edges are palatial, so no longer workers, and I would ring the regular houses with a statue-garden-statue-garden pattern of decor so that I could strategically remove a statue to allow a house to expand into a palatial estate if I wanted to decrease unemployment (houses would expand over gardens but not statues). If you ran the block with regular houses, you'd put a feeder road around the outside of the block leading to an industrial area, kept far enough away to avoid desirability impact, but close enough that the industry's radiant walkers would encounter the houses and therefore be able to hire workers.

I would sometimes remove the entertainment venues from the block if it was experiencing instability (randomly happened due to Pharaoh's pathing engine) and put them on their own external path around the back of the houses.

This, btw, is what the game actually looked like while playing, courtesy of Wikipedia. Though this person's city looks like a dog's breakfast (to be fair it seems to be a tutorial). I did play it on a larger, rectangular screen eventually, and it was still a great looking game years after release. I'm disappointed the 2023 remake has changed the artstyle to a more cutesy, cartoony direction, since in my mind the original was perfect.

I will have to talk about building block strategies for Nebuchadnezzar in a part 2 since I apparently wanted to talk about Pharaoh more than I expected.