#[ill fucking win]
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some good news!! the spanish state's ministry of equality has finally passed one of the most progressive trans laws on the planet, shielded free and universal access to abortion and banned conversion therapy and genital surgery for intersex babies, among a lot of other feminist policies. the minister of equality irene montero gave a speech thanking spain's lgtb and trans associations for helping her draft these legislations. couldn't be more proud!!
#spain#trans#ill always prioritize queer&trans revolution over reformism but man. man these are good news#these are gonna make people's life so much more comfortable#i was lucky enough to live in andalucia where we have THEE most advanced regional legislation on trans rights#so i didnt have to fight too many people to access hrt and to change my name on legal docs#but other ppl on the spanish state have been suffering so fucking much#and yeah this law doesnt cover non binary people or migrants but the door is fucking open. its a step forward#and after this terrible terrible week#after the antitrans antisemite game & brianna's murder and so many rampant transphobia#it feels nice to get a win#to have someone in power be so unwaveringly supportive#the queer community in the spanish state is NEVER gonna forget this. never#anyways!!!#felicidades gente trans española!!!! nos vemos en el registro civil dkkskdkkdkxkdk#mine
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do you deserve to be loved?
#*smashes thru the wall like the kool aid man* im fucking back#we're so back. it's joever. i'm screeching into the sun i'm ILL i fucking sobbed last night i cried during work#i sat and drew during my lunch i finished the lore drop at 7am and didnt sleep and drew until work started at 9#i. um. i dont even know where to start for making shit. i feel adrift i feel lost in the sauce of misery#the way he screamed at his baby self that he didnt deserve to cry. that he didnt deserve to be loved. im fucking ILL#ive talked before abt his bad relationship w his own mortality but ngl i REALLY underestimated how deep this ran...esp w the new dad knowle#twst#twisted wonderland#twst silver#silver vanrouge#ch7 spoilers#book 7 spoilers#he got a new rigged expression!!! all the new animations!!!!!! as a rig animator by trade i was v impressed and pleased#silver nation. fuck every other book like im sorry this one wins u cant deny it#suntails
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everytime sunghoon wins a rugby match he pulls at his jersey and jumps with his friends, sweat clinging to his hair and gleaming over his perfect skin. he’s so attractive when he’s victorious, a knowing smirk as he hears the intercom announce yet another smashing win. and yet through all the noise, through the pats on the back and the itch of the padding, he sees you near, jumping to your friend in a jersey identical to his—you’re wearing his old jersey with 12 to represent december, and the number on his to represent your birthmonth.
and the kiss after? oh, you’d kiss him no matter how gross he is. park sunghoon with a smirk and your number on his jersey is a man you are lucky to call yours.
#hey so i might die#i keep thinking abt like#hes on stage rocking out to the music n shit#HES SO FINE OMFG HELLO#can i have him.#like when he rocks his head#MAKE SOME FUCKING NOOSEEEEEEE#god pregame#‘hey ill treat us to dinner if i win’#you pout#‘but you always treat me’#‘do i always treat you or do i happen to win everytime?’#OMFG#NEED NEED NEED#SESATE ME RB#SEDATE#ME.#ren den#sunghoon x reader#park sunghoon x reader#enhypen x reader
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okay unironically I love so much that porter is like this world SUCKS its BAD here and it HURTS you why do you care abt it!!! and literally every single bad kid is like ngl we just hate ur ass it does not matter what ur philosophy is
#dimension 20#fantasy high junior year#not art#fhjy spoilers#its!!! gods I will Be My Ass in the tags rn. but thats so like. deliciously setting typical#like porter's desire is to transcend and his contempt for the world he's in feels. idk Real#like he plays the game bc he wants to win and be done with it. how do I word this#yknow. being a god would like. be his win state. when he gets that happening thats it his story is done he checks out#meanwhile the bad kids do actually just like playing the game lmao. like they love adventuring!#theyre so solidly Of This World. they carry the values that can only be born of it and they like having mastery over it#its a meta angle that I think is very fun specifically for d20 being in such a unique position in the zeitgeist when it first started#the rat grinders are from DnD Writ Large. porter wants to escape. but this is the bad kids' home its Their Actual Play Show#which makes it so fucking excellent to me that porter's question is somewhat of merit! its their show and it tries very hard to punish them#and they just straight up dont listen to him here lmao bc they hate him but! since the moment the academic track ended its been clear#that they save the world bc they Like Playing. With Each Others#thats what riz thinks the core of adventuring is! thats why fig stayed! and I also think thats why this hovers over elmville now and#a dead god is coming back in the school gym. porter is a shit evangelist but even if hes a good one I dont think it wouldve worked like he#wants it to. the only way he couldve escaped is if he'd not involved elmville at all. thats where the bad kids met dude#its a shitty place that fucks with them but they all come back here bc they wanna play with each others#and in that regard I think thats what the stress tokens ultimately means. Is This Game Still Fun To Play. ITS A RAGEQUIT LIMIT#Im literally running from one end to another of this conspiracy board Ive pulled out of nowhere#Ill draw after this I just wanna get this out. gods this episode has done nothing but furthering my delusion of grandeur actually#Im the hottest smartest manthing on earth Im king fucking midas over here. anyways uh! great ep!
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ghost fucking soap so hard and so good he passes out but he utterly panics about it
he thinks he must’ve ignored soap asking to stop; was it pain that made him pass out? how bad could it have been to make him pass out when he’s been shot and kept going? should he bring him to medical? he’ll never touch him again, he’ll never so much as look at him again; he’ll ask for a transfer- fuck that, a dishonourable discharge. there’s no coming back from this
he spirals, guilt chasing hatred chasing despair chasing fear, until soap finally wakes back up
soap's still floating, loose-limbed and buzzing; fucked so thoroughly out of his head that it takes him a while to notice ghost isn't in bed with him anymore. he frowns, lifting a heavy head off the pillow and freezes. ghost's on the other side of the room, curled up tight in the corner as far away from soap as he could get without leaving him alone
(he would've left, would've made sure soap never had to see his face again and be reminded of what he did to him, of the monster he’d let into his bed- but he couldn't just leave him unconscious; what if he didn't wake up, he had to make sure he was safe first even if he'll rightfully hate him forever when he does wake up)
soap's voice when he calls out to him makes him flinch, his head burying deeper in his knees. cold worry chases the bliss from his blood and soap pushes himself up but his shaking arms can't hold his weight
the sound of him collapsing back onto the bed makes ghost rear up, his panic growing and soap's heart breaks at his red rimmed eyes
it takes a long time for soap to coax him back to the bed, countless loops of, "sweetheart, please, come here, what happened? it's okay, everything’s going to be okay.”
(and how ghost’s self-hatred grows hearing soap comforting him; hearing the concern and love in his voice when he doesn’t deserve a drop of it)
it takes even longer for ghost to believe soap when he says that he passed out because he felt so good; that he never asked ghost to stop, never wanted him to stop. that he trusts him more than anything and knows he'd rather die than ever hurt him, especially like that
“you’re not a monster, love,” he promises, soft with conviction and it’s as much a surrender as a relief when he collapses into his lap and lets him hold him close
ghost believes johnny but he still can't bring himself to be intimate with him for a while; that fear still haunting him, but soap doesn't hold it against him, doesn't complain about ghost's perceived "step back" in their relationship
hell, ghost seems to hate it more than he does; he misses being with soap, misses the connection, the closeness they shared, the safety and quiet he found in his embrace, but he's always trusted soap more than he trusts himself
soap doesn't let him be consumed by his fear or worse, sabotage them and turn it into a punishment; doesn't let him even get through the suggestion of switching because he knows how much he hates it and he won’t let him twist something as good and pure as their physical love into something self-harming
instead, he brings them back to the basics, working through the steps to get ghost comfortable with intimacy again, to get him to trust himself again; spends happy months just grinding and exchanging handjobs like when their relationship first started
and it's a happy day for them both when soap finally falls apart on his cock once again, anxiety the farthest thing from ghost's mind when his arms are wrapped so tightly around him, kissing a smile against his lips
#i dont want to know what it says about me but i love traumatic misunderstandings?#thing like thinking the other is sh’ing or has an ed or in this case pushed the other beyond their limits#i think its the knowledge that its not true and the love or trust of the souple will win out above the guilt or fear#even less severe ones like thinking the other is mentally ill when they actually time traveled or can see ghosts or whatever#i just really like misunderstandings that have actual weight to them#tw for ghosts comic backstory#but ghost surviving roba and the hell he put him through only to be terrified of being like him? oh that shit Hits#like ghost knows hes fucked up he knows he has trauma and he knows he likes killing people a little too much#but him being scared of that twisting into him becoming like the people that hurt him? very interesting very painful#and him ever thinking that he did that to /johnny/? it would destroy him#coming out of my cage and ive been doing just fine.txt#ghostsoap#soapghost#ghost cod#simon ghost riley#soap cod#john soap mactavish#we’re a team. ghost team#save post#ghoap#call of duty#cod#cod mw2#cod mwii
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Eepin 🥹
#inuyasha#brain rot art#Moroha#is Father’s Day#let him be a dad#I’m gunna throat punch sunrise right in the fuckin dick for that#fucking bitches#GAWD#i reject that decision whole-heartedly#cowards#mofugging limp dicked COWARDS#just *clenches fists*#AS NDNEKAKSKSM#can you IMAGINE#fuck me seven ways til sunday jesus christ#ALSO#Kagome as a mom is neat too#i just need Inu as a girl dad#🥺🥺🥺#fucking FUCK#come out and fight me i stg ill win#i have the power of god AND anime on my side#papayasha
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he is babygirl to ME.........
#im groaning like a dying old man why do i gotta wife up the most difficult villains to draw#anyways . my delusions r winning#2023#fanart#overwatch#ramattra#overwatch fanart#overwatch 2#why did they give a robot an adams apple. who was responsible 4 that. ill kiss you right on your fucking mouth
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note: pollmaker is thinking of the USAmerican lottery system (powerball, mega millions, state lottos, scratchoffs, etc), but poll applies to other countries lotteries systems so long as its still the same concept of "big ol state sponsered gambling shit", but not like casino style gambling. u know what i mean, Lottos.
questions for the tags: how regularly, what stuff you play, if you have limits for yourself, if you feel like its a Problem for you, and for funsies the usual 'first thing youd do if you won the lottery' shit
reblog to have absolutely zero effect on your luck either way. just like, absolutely no change in luck whether you reblog this or scroll past. this is the luck neutral post reblog in the next 30 seconds or dont who give a shit
#buzzy#REMAKING BECAUSE I FORGOT THE FUCKING NO OPTION CHRIST im bad at this#do u ever spend so long thinking about every possible 'OP WHY DIDNT YOU MAKE AN OPTION FOR THIS SPECIFIC SITUATION'#that u forget the fucking 'no' optik#polls#poll#lottery#lotteries#the lottery#gambling#okay to repeat my personal answers: yes but i do only $3 per week and ONLY the texas lotto#i do my lucky numbers and i do a multi draw (does the next ten drawings w the same numbers) so that i dont gotta#pay attention to it for a couple of weeks#which makes it less of A Thing#so im not activelt rhinking about it as much#im ya kno impulsive and in the past it was 'ohh $5 per week and scratchoffs' but that meant too much of a#'oh but this week ill spend an extra $5 ive been good....'#and it was too easy for me to justify going overboard#i know 'not playing at all' is the better option but this scratches the itch just enough that i dont feel tempted to impulse buy scratchoffs#while also being p hands off so im not obsessing over it as much#ya kno?#yeah im consistently wasting money but it keeps me from IMPULSIVELY wasting EVEN MORE money#and it means i can keep lotto winning dreams jn the back of my mind#also first thing id do is go to doctors and find out wtf is wrong w me#well not the FIRST first. first first is probs getting myself a little treat like some dutch bros
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my annual battle with covid and flu vaxx combo leaving me wondering if immunity is worth it like at a certain point it feels like u just made me excruciatingly sick for a whole day rather than spread out over the course of a week or two
#the fuck is with covid vaccines making my bodys new response to illness extreme muscle snd joint pain#why is my body struggling to win the battle against dead viruses bro#LISTEN I KNOW ITS MY BODY DOING ITS JOB BUT GUESS WHAT IM REALLY UNCOMFORTABLE#AND ALSO A LITTLE SCARED#idc how many times ppl will assure me that the symptoms are normal and to be expected each time im like this is great i am Done For
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Till's piece from the event is a very honest depiction, but I want to examine it in more detail since it looks so interesting.
For one, I find the headpiece confusing, I was hesitant on this point in the last post I made covering this I assumed the headpiece Till is wearing (separate from the headphones) was this device.
There isn't even a name for that device, but it's been theorized that it serves a similar function have the collars pet humans have, but affects the pet humans in some way.
I believe it's a behavioral management device since there is an emphasis on the brain when it's shown. And just based on the design itself. I think the purpose of it is similar to a shock collar.
Till in this environment looks familiar, he has that focused expression that he always has when he's writing music, like he's in a daze. Since this is a practice in a controlled environment I think he might actually be handling an instrument this time around (hence the headphones). Till has a natural passion for music, the environment of Anakt Garden also appears more calm than what he goes through with Urak so he looks very much in his element.
But despite how calm, and focused he looks outwardly, his collar shows orange.
Till is giving with his expressions even around the aliens, so if he was feeling bad (I would suspect as much seeing the fresh experiment patches..) I believe it would look more obvious, but the difference threw me off a bit. I could be reaching (definitely) But given how unruly his behavior can be, and how much effort the aliens are putting into finding ways to subdue him I think they used that device to mellow him out so that they could properly monitor him.
The collar being orange gives me the impression that he's not as calm as he looks but the headpiece is keeping him in a 'sedated' state(?)
Red - Condition in the negatives, energy depleted, feeling bad. overall horrible state.
Orange, yellow - to a lesser extent, more like if you're feeling skittish, nervous, (think of this mode as feeling under the weather)
Green - Good, calm, happy, normal and a healthy mode.
(Translation by kh47uo on Twitter)
This behavior could also show desensitization, as he had likely been conditioned to not be phased nor show weakness in front of the aliens even if he feels bad, a way of tolerating. But this is just me trying to make sense of whatever that head gear was... he could've also been sedated beforehand (banging my head against the concrete)
Also interesting to me that we weren't shown Till doing other things, like dancing, or singing. I think it's a testament to Anakt's (And Urak's) priorities as they have Till build on his music skills, his strongest skill. It's probably because that's all he has to offer is his music (His grades in every other subject are a mess.). So building that to its greatest potential before anything is important. But it's a reminder of the situation, he's not so intense about his craft because of his inclination to it. He doesn't make music simply because he likes it, he does it because it's what he has to do to survive. Despite doing what he is naturally driven to do, he looks like he has had his life drained out of him.
Urak (the bastard) knows that for sure. Appearances, and 'decent' skills can get you far but overwhelming passion and skill can put you farther above all the rest, it's exactly why Luka is the best in his league, and why Urak pushes Till to his limits to surpass that even with such destructive means.
#overanalyzing this under a microscope for science#yes this is a smelly brainvomit i really just want to yap because i love this piece#probably one of my favorites#im gonna kill urak im gonna kill urak im gonna kill#explodes#i think i went a little off track here but i found a lot to say about this piece#this whole event looked like what the aliens find flaws in their pet humans/ need to perfect#like Ivan. above all things he needed to get his appearance corrected for the stage#things like that#it's probably very mundane to the aliens#to me it looks like medieval torture#average day of kindergarten in alien stage:#im getting tears on my keyboard#alien stage#alnst#alien stage till#alnst till#i think they probably zooted him out like usual if the head piece is there for nothing in specific#i know its something to do with experiments though the wires are tell tale#whyre the aliens taking so much fucking blood#ill become a doctor to solve this mystery#something something heperu and urak are going to drive their pets ballistic the more they treat them like soldiers that can take anything#in the name of 'improvement' more like 'win my silly ego game my little barbie doll'#THEY WERE ALL JUST KIDS DAMN#FUCK#slams my head on the pavement agai
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yk how everyone says ivan doesn't think he's being a hypocrite because he's TECHNICALLY doing the same thing as sua did BUT he's convinced it wont give till trauma because he's SO. SO SURE TILL DOESN'T LIKE HIM BACK OR DOESN'T EVEN CARE ABOUT HIM EVEN.
but what if he does. what would he do about that information? what will he do then.? if he found out before round 6, what would he have done differently? would he still have sacrificed himself regardless, selfishly wanting till to live for him? or would he have tried to defy the aliens, would he have tried to get them both killed so they can die together, "escape" together once more? (THAT WOULD BE SO FUCKING SAD I'D KILL MYSELF)
what would he do, if lets say he spectates till like a guardian angel once he dies and sees how MISERABLE till is now that ivan's dead, would he believe it? would he delude himself into thinking it's because of mizi still having not been found? would he take it all back and beg god to bring him back to life to hold till in his embrace and tell him it's alright?
i dont fucking know anymore man im going insane because of them
#ivantill#alien stage#alnst#alnst till#alien stage till#till alien stage#till alnst#ivan alien stage#alien stage ivan#ivan alnst#alnst ivan#i am ill#im going insane#im going to kms#im going to explode#I NEED TO SEE TILL WIN ROUND 7 AND LOOK SO FUCKING MISERABLE#and he swears he sees the ghost of ivan clapping for him in the corner of his eye#im not okay
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btw this is probably one of the most insane and telling scenes in regards to stewy nd kendall. like the stewy-marcia interaction first off. the way it’s so clearly paralleling kenstewy with logan and marcia. stewy and marcia literally watch their respective persons in silence. also important to note that stewy was one of the first ppl to greet logan when he arrived probably bc he knew that one of the first things logan was going to do was approach kendall and he wanted to get in there first to gauge the situation + logan. but stewy’s concern for kendall in regards to what could happen when he’s in close proximity to logan is so clear and almost synonymous with marcia’s own concern/love for logan at this point. like it seems intentional that they were shown to be like. logan and kendall’s respective partners here
#kenstewy#succession#stewy hosseini#stewy/marcia interaction just in general is insane. like she greeted him with such warmth. you can tell she genuinely fucking likes him.#like that’s soooooo . us brown ppl always win btw !#but also it’s like. the loganmarcia kenstewy parallels you could make…#marcia was the only one to completely understand and unequivocally love logan while knowing exactly who he was and what’s he done. and she#supported him stuck by him etc until he betrayed her#like he grew careless of her and took her for granted. and does that sound familiar? like that happened to my guys kendall and stewy. insane#ALSO throughout this scene you see stewy greet logan and marcia -> watch kendall talk to logan -> see him walking kind of fast in some#direction until caroline approaches him (and even then he doesn’t chat for long at all) -> then finally he finds kendall and sits down to#talk to him. like throughout this whole scene he’s just following kendall around😵💫 like it’s literally a party and he’s like. running after#kendall the whole time. and when he sits down he’s like. hey heard you talked to your dad lol. like he wasn’t 8 feet away watching kendall#intently stood next to marcia while it was happening. like that’s super insane#kind of unrelated but not really but stewy has the worst case of anxiety i’ve ever seen like he’s sooo anxious. he’s mentally ill fr and#i love him with all my heart#stewy#kennystewy#p
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James Vowles, you will not see heaven
#f1#formula 1#formula one#alex my love i am so sorry but like oscar i have beef with your team principals/owners & am praying on their downfall#*music blasting from speakers* i hope you know i hope you know that this id nothing to do with you!#I've got your back girl (alex & oscar) from right over here (as far from james vowles & zak brown as possible)!#but like how did he make thr apology worse?#and him dancing around nicos direct question about mick#also the wanting to bring a driver from the academy up is great yes we love to see that BUT IT AIN'T WHAT HAPPENED#franco has no prospect of a williams seat for next year#and logans treatment shows that they are very willing to throw their young drivers under the bus#as cutthroat as red bulls decisions were and there were unquestionably cutthroat#they were at least fighting for wins & for p2 in the championship in 2019&2020 & then were in position to go for the title in 2021#if you're going to engage in dog eats dog you actually need to be one of the big dogs#anti james vowles#mick schumacher#edit: i just saw the “hes reached the limit of what hes able to achieve & in fact its almost unfair on him to continue that” comment#logan is a fucking person not an terminally ill animal that has to be put down!#logan sargeant
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The Vampire Lestat is my much less talented Kanye West, my 2020 Yung Miami, My Ice Spice
#lestat would absolutely write im the shit im that bitch im miss poopie and think this will get Louis back#it does not get louis back#so obsessed with how bad his music is#like the production value is so high and you can tell but the actual lyrics...#well its a win for fat lestat nation so i cant complain truly but... this is like lates 2010s Smoky Robinson to me#lestat de lioncourts debut album is what smoky robinson thought gasms would be#lestat should stick to producing#but imma stick beside him ill be in that stationhead arguing with barbs on charting numbers#people with ears: is the song good?#lestat stans:it charted!!!!!!!!#hes my yuno miles. my sexxy red#lestat absolutely could do bae i luh. you you my everything you my main one fuck a wedding ring-#but sexxy red couldnt do ill get fatter when we break up im an actor#interview with the vampire#iwtv#amc iwtv#lestat de lioncourt#iwtv s3 teaser#the vampire lestat
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SORRY TEAM RICE. I AM YOUR WEAKEST WARRIOR
#Ive gotten so numb to losing that I go in never expecting to win. Ill just play to the situation and see what happens#fuck it we ball style#opal owl hoots
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also i do apologize for the election posting tonight, i try to keep this blog free of real world stuff and i don't really have anything meaningful to say but i'm not gonna be able to sleep for awhile and a bit of posting making me feel better than just ignoring the news. i'm tagging everything "us politics" and "us elections" if anyone needs to block the tags.
#us politics#us elections#gonna try to watch some youtube vids and paint but also i am not going to be able to focus on anything other than the election#pleaseeeee pennsylvania pleassssse michigna pleaseeeee wisconsin#i cant fucking do another four years of trump#and neither can whats left of this fucking country#if the harris wins ill go back to criticizing the dems in about a week but i think defeating an actual fascist is a little more important
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