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Duet, Pt 8

McKay had likely been en route to his quarters when Sheppard caught up with him, and next we get to see his private living space for the first time on the show. We don't get to see them a lot. We see his quarters only three additional times, all in the fifth season (McKay talks with Teyla in his quarters in The Seed S05E02, takes a bath in Broken Ties S05E03, and stands in front of a mirror in Tracker S05E09). So, there must be some reason for showing him here, in his own private space, now.

McKay enters, takes off his jacket and ear piece, falling straight to his bed face first and apparently going out like a light.

We don't actually see a whole hell of a lot. He has a dresser, diplomas and possibly certificates of awards on his walls, some photos (not of other people), a photo of the only pussy he cares for on his bed side table, an apple, a large jug (for water?). He also has a new ergonomic mattress. All of this he brought with him from Earth on the Daedalus because the first time, they were allowed one personal item (we never do find out what his one item had been). But it's important to note that this is not what his quarters looked like before they left for Earth. These aren't even necessarily the same quarters that he (they) had then (although the way Sheppard was hanging out by them suggests that these were the quarters they had shared before it all went wrong) but even so, his quarters would have looked different before they revisited Earth.

Now, there's nothing in his room that screams Sheppard in particular, and that's the point. At this time in their relationship, there shouldn't be any--and that's why it's safe to show it to us now. There's a tac vest slung over McKay's chair, but that's just as likely to be his own (although why he would have brought it into his room is anyone's guess, he probably shouldn't be allowed to do that and the tac vest that he was wearing on the planet earlier was probably taken off of him and returned to the armoury; but then again, he rumpled up his jacket and threw it likewise on the chair). Also note that McKay, like Sheppard has seemingly been doing, goes to sleep in his clothes without bothering to undress. Sure, he's tired but this also doesn't seem like the first time he's done this. But this also is not how he usually sleeps, this is a more recent development.

There is a photo on his desk that appears to be of two people of nearly equal height, one of whom has darker hair than the other. It's impossible to see who are in the photo but given what we know of his childhood, it's doubtful that he would keep a constant reminder of his parents on his desk. He is also estranged from his sister at this time, so he probably wouldn't have photos of her. They likely also had no means of taking photographs during their first year in Pegasus, or else we never saw them neither take nor develop photos.

One option is that this is a photo from Sheppard's promotion. This might be supported by it rhyming with the fact that we see a photo of Cadman's promotion or graduation later in her room. She has family, she has people in her life, as we see from the various photos littering her space. He does not. We can't know for certain if this is a photo of himself and Sheppard he has on his desk, but it would make the most sense if that is what it was. Also, it's shot from the neck up which suggests that both people are men.

McKay lays flat on his stomach on the bed, where previously we have seen him sleep in his side. This makes him take up a bigger portion of the bed than if he were spooning with someone, and this obscures the fact that this bed is bigger than the one we see in Sheppard's quarters. This bed fits two people who like to sleep spooning snugly, and his bed seems to be the same size as Cadman's bed that we see later but because they are shot from a different angle, her bed seems wider. McKay's bed also seems to have two pillows even though one of them is currently at the foot of the bed. Now, we see him fall asleep fully clothed here while we later see him "in the buff" in Cadman's bed, in Cadman's space, and are given an explanation that his nudity there is Cadman's influence. We get a chance to see him naked under the covers with the explanation that this is all Cadman, not as himself. But McKay probably doesn't usually sleep fully clothed, either. Or he didn't, before.

Having fallen asleep and turning his brain off, this seems to give Cadman an opportunity to get behind the wheel and drive McKay's body, and she seizes the opportunity. And we see an immediate change in his body language. This is not the body language of an effeminate man and definitely is not the body language of a gay man, this is the body language of a woman in a man's body. And this woman in a man's body seems to have plans.

Cadman feels up McKay's chest to only to find her breasts gone, and this is the first violation of McKay's physical integrity. She feels up his erogenous zone without his consent, never mind that he never consented to give her free use of his body to begin with. Even with a distinct lack of breasts Cadman unzips his shirt to show off his non-existent cleavage because she appears to have designs on what to do now that he can use McKay's body to do what ever she likes. And while we saw very little interaction between Cadman and Beckett out on the field (there, Cadman seemed more interested in talking to McKay about Katie Brown, for some reason real interested in her love life), she suddenly seems to really want him. Like, really want him.

Now, I've written about the Ancients and people with the Ancient gene having this physical pull due to their assortative mating strategy that just makes people with the gene attractive to one another. And while McKay considers Beckett his best friends, likely knows that he's (at least mostly) straight and isn't interested in him like that, now that Cadman is in McKay's body, Beckett seems irresistible to her, all of a sudden. Previously, back in the field, Cadman ignored Beckett in favour of talking about her friend to McKay. Now that she's in his body that has the artificially activated ATA gene, she's willing to full-on violate the bodily autonomy of the chief scientist of Atlantis to get her some of that. This change in her disposition toward Beckett as she changed bodies is pretty telling with regards to this Ancient attraction.

Taking McKay out for a spin, she heads up to Beckett's lab and pretends to be his friend. Beckett, that is, thinks he's speaking with McKay, and his reactions here are pretty interesting. McKay does not seem at all like himself, and Beckett does seem to be weirded out by his behaviour but it's also pretty interesting that he does not for one moment seem to doubt that this is, in fact, McKay. And to be sure, we have seen McKay act like a bitchy queen on a couple of occasions (The Defiant One S01E12, the end of Rising S01E02, his scenes with Peter Grodin), once even with Beckett himself, so while he is rather carefully maintaining masculine performance around the military types in order to protect any non-heterosexual servicemen, it's not as though he's incapable of behaving in this manner when he feels secure and like he's not jeopardizing anyone's military career by casting aspersions on their characters through contact or proximity.

All things considered, it's pretty interesting that McKay's best friend, who knows that he's currently sharing a brain with another person who just so happens to be a woman, does not doubt that this is McKay. So this must be in-character for the McKay he knows. Beckett, his best friend, thinks that he is speaking with McKay:

Cadman: Busy? Beckett: No, no. Come in. How are you feeling? Cadman: Fine. Beckett: Really? Cadman: Hmm. Mainly because of Cadman. She's calming, you know? Between you and me, I am damned lucky it was her.

What's interesting here is that while earlier Cadman told McKay to be cool and he told Sheppard that he was not cool, here Cadman tells Beckett that McKay is fine where McKay is, despite what he may just have told Sheppard, anything but fine.

Beckett: Should you, uh...? Cadman: Oh, she's asleep. Can't hear a thing.

Here, she actually tells Beckett that it's possible for one of them to be completely turned off, and Beckett still does not doubt that he's talking and interacting with McKay here. Even as McKay touches him in a way that seems to weird him out, he doesn't suspect him. Also note: Beckett now thinks that they're in private, that he's having a private conversation with McKay. He thinks that Lieutenant Cadman, a military officer, is not listening in on them. This being the case, we learn something real interesting:

Cadman: Hey, you wanna do me a favour? You know, you wanna ride shotgun on this date tomorrow night? Beckett: With Doctor Brown? Cadman: Katie. Beckett: You're going through with it? Cadman: Well, I've cancelled on her so many times. I don't wanna mess this up.

First, Beckett calls her "Dr Brown" because apparently that's what McKay has been referring to her as with Beckett, if they have ever talked about her at all. Doctor Brown is a member of the science team, and apparently Beckett thinks McKay had been joking about going out with her. He thinks he has to be joking now. Beckett thinks that McKay actually going out with a woman has to be pulling his leg. He had just been fucking with Cadman earlier, right? Beckett says "You're going through with it?" with the incredulity of someone who has no idea why his gay best friend is actually going to go out on a date with a woman.

And also. Here we learned that McKay has canceled on Katie Brown multiple times. So many times. And Cadman knows about this. McKay has canceled on Katie Brown so many times that she's discussed this at ladies' poker night. All in all, it seems like Katie Brown has been the one asking McKay out for dinner, and McKay has been turning her down with ever flimsier excuses. He was going to turn her down now. Even Cadman could tell McKay was going to turn her down because she wouldn't have needed to go through all this trouble to make sure the date happens if she'd believed it would. Now, she thinks McKay is too chickenshit to make it happen, that he's messing it up because he just doesn't understand women. It doesn't occur to her that he might be messing it up on purpose. Beckett seems bewildered by this.

Beckett: But what do you want me to do? Cadman: Listen, I don't think it's any big secret that I am terrible with women. Having someone there to cut me off when I start making a fool of myself would be a great help. I'd consider it a personal favour.

So, Beckett laughs out loud when McKay says it's not a secret that he's terrible with women. Beckett knows his secret, knows just why he is terrible with women (in the sense that he regards and treats women rather awfully, not that he couldn't get one if he wanted to, as it seems like women working for him frequently want to fuck him). But he also seems a little bit freaked out by McKay's proposal here because he's not going to have sex with her on his behalf. Like, he can help a mate out but he draws the line in having sex with a woman that wants to have sex with McKay just so the man can keep his secret, maintain his cover. There's a line to how good of a friend he is and Beckett just discovered where it is. Beckett's "What do you want me to do?" most definitely holds the implication that he thought McKay wants him to do things with Katie Brown that he doesn't want to do, to get physical with her on his behalf.

Note also her use of the phrase personal favour here. Earlier, McKay described having to go on a date with a woman with a woman's consciousness trapped in his brain as his own personal hell. This, here, is most definitely a part of that hell. And Beckett has to really believe McKay is a friend in need that he actually agrees to go through with this. He doesn't know what McKay is on about but he does know his gay best friend cannot survive dinner with a woman that clearly wants to fuck him without a chaperone. He's not agreeing to go because he's expecting a threesome, he's not agreeing to go because he thinks he can help McKay score. He's agreeing to go as a chaperone. He's going to run interference for McKay.

Before turning to leave, Cadman again touches Beckett by patting him on the chest and here she manages to violate the physical boundaries of two men at the same time. As a doctor, Beckett is more used to non-sexual touching than most people but this is not the way that his gay best friend has ever touched him before. He is definitely weirded out by this. But still he has no doubts that he was just talking with McKay. Cadman attempts to make this a manly pat here, performing masculinity and manhood as she understands it. This is meant to cover up for the gentler touch earlier, to convince Beckett that he is talking with a man. Only, Cadman is not a man and hence can only give her approximation of manhood.

Furthermore, she's not even attempting to actually perform McKay here, as she does not know him well enough to perform him effectively. Now, while Beckett senses that something is not quite right, he still does not suspect that this is not McKay. But it's almost certain that this performance would never have worked on Sheppard. Sheppard knows McKay so well that he would have caught her immediately. Earlier in the lab, Sheppard was the first to notice when McKay started acting strangely and just before in the hallway he could tell McKay wasn't alright just from his back, without even seeing his face. Here, he very likely would have clocked something being off before McKay had said a single word just from the way he walked, how he stood with a hand on his hip. Sheppard knows McKay, and it has nothing to do with how masculine or effeminate he's acting. He knows McKay because he has observed him intimately. He knows McKay better than his best friend knows him. There is only one reason for something like that.

Continued in Pt. 9

#sga #stargate atlantis #john sheppard #sga meta #sheppard is bi #rodney mckay #rodney is gay #ep. duet #ep. the seed #ep. tracker #ep. broken ties

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