#[-*an attempt was made yeet!!*-]

[krysmcscience]

BILLDUMP TIME (with transparency, because I can). Don't mind me, I'm just yeeting my goofy art at some way more talented individuals out of nowhere and then hauling ass back to the security of being a weird silent lurker ahaha

@tesscourtes and @beccadrawsstuff, respectively! These two Bills make a little prism of sorts together because of their recent crossovers on Patreon~ :3c Speaking of which, I highly recommend supporting both these artists! They do fantastic work! (TessCourtes and Beccup)

@qoolk on the left, and @monobmp on the right! I am such a sucker for these outfits~ OuO Go and check these two out, their art is phenomenal!!! >u<

@1spooky2me The most difficult Bill of the lot for me to draw, ahaha... Their art is so incredibly consistent and dynamic, I am, a little envious <:,) A little envious, but mostly impressed, so go look at their amazing art, what are you waiting for

And finally, @ckret2, whose writing is sublimely in-character and just a delight to read - they're a great artist, as well! I simply Could Not resist drawing their Bill in this ridiculous incredible and very fashionable pink feather dress, even though he only briefly wears it in their fic, so I also did a little bonus doodle of him in his standard hoodie to make up for it. XD (Also, as far as I'm concerned, Bill and Mabel were both correct in that lime green accessories make the dress Much Better.)

This is just a small selection of the human Bill designs I enjoy. I may draw and post more later on, who knows! Feel free to reblog with some neat Bill designs, either your own or by other folks - if any of the designs particularly call to me, I'll add them to the little list I've got going~ :D (Alternatively, if you really like my stuff and want me to draw something specific, you could...mmm...perhaps, commission me...? OuO)

Also I'm tagging Billford because uhhhh yeah, sorry not sorry, every single one of these Bills is getting shipped with Ford by the artists in some way or another, lmao

[distance-does-not-matter]

update on the dating app guy: he made it so that if i did in fact meet up with him, i would not be able to defend myself from the egg on my face, so i had to call it off. also some of the stuff was :/ but the funniest was what i am calling the peacocking

[tvntheatre]

lalalalalaaaaa

hello once again, tumblr user @ballcrusher74

... So anyway, I'm still impressed I managed to make these. Al and Tixton drawn without reference by memory, Jawbreaker drawn with some reference that I no longer had at the time I decided to color. By the way fuck you phone camera, the greys I drew on the jacket are unreadable now because I had to edit it to look clearer.

Various close ups, because I hate my phone camera and I can't afford a scanner. Mobile Tumblr please don't fuck up the format

[thetimelordbatgirl]

Because villains who are completely crazy and happy being evil and just having the time of their life's doing so are fun, next question.

[sunset-synthetica]

still waiting to get my first official call out post. come on guys. I'm trying

[dcxdpdabbles]

I have this idea for a post but I feel like you would do it justice.

Basically, Danny is yeeted through a dimensional portal and reincarnated as the clone son of Tim and Connor(from when Tim cloned Connor during his death). This little shit wakes up after that, when Connor has already been found, as a six year old gremlin with a need for chaos.

Que pranks!

I don’t have much more than that so I will leave this in your capable hands.

-🎃

"Master Bruce, if I have to remind you to fix your tie one more time, Gotham will be without its protecter for many months to come!" Alfred snapped - actually snapped - from where he was attempting to reorganize the entirey of the Emberald Sitting room.

Right now, he moved all the furniture and all the wall directions. He was just adding some tastefully done flower pots to make the place look inviting but also regal.

It had been six hours, and from the looks of it, Alfred had not found the balance he desperately wanted. He started over four times. His patience was all but gone.

Bruce's hands snap to his tie, scrambling to get it set just right. He moves it only slightly to the left - not making much difference - with a nervous smile. Alfred's teeth snap shut with a click, and his eyes blaze with frustrated rage as he rounds the coffee table toward the billionaire.

Bruce looks to be holding back a scream.

Dick winces, sinking into his chair lest the aged Butler turns his ire onto him. He knows why this evening has to be just right. Especially to Alfred, but gosh, he could not handle how terrifying the butler could be.

It's just for one dinner and one evening. Dick tells himself. Once Alfred can finally say he married one of us off, things will return to normal.

"Honestly! If you didn't walk around looking like an unkeept vagabond all the time, maybe there would be a Lady of the House by now!" Alfred sneered at a pale-looking Bruce.

Or maybe Timmy bringing Kon over to announce their engagement means Alfred will try to marry the rest of us off harder. Dick despairs as Bruce endures another tongue-lashing. He wants to go help, but if he moves even an inch from his seat, Alfred might realize Dick is still in the room.

He can't afford to anger the beast any further.

"And you, Master Dick!" Alfred suddenly rounds on Dick, pointing one long finger into his face, with narrowed eyes and the grim reaper at his shoulder. Oh, dear.

Thankfully, that's when the doorbell rings. At once, Alfred's face clears into an excited smile. "They're here! I'll let them in right away; you lads, gather the rest of the family. And remember, we must make a great impression! Tonight is the night we invite Mister Kon into the family!"

The butler doesn't quite skip out of the room, but the bristle walking with a chipper head turning is the close that Dick has ever seen him do.

"I'm so happy for Tim." Bruce mutters,"but I can not handle any more reminders that I haven't had a spouse."

"Tell me about it," Dick sighs, following after his father into the hallway and down to the dining hall. He can distantly hear Alfred opening the door and greeting the two. "A hour ago, he made seven passive agressive reminders that Tamaraneans propse with a dinner and a mock battle. Seven. I mean, how does he even know what Tamaraneans do when courting?"

"It's Alfred." Bruce tells him, taking a seat at the head of the table. Dick sits in the chair to his right as the oldest and First Heir- considering the reply. It makes sense.

Damian, Cass, and Duke walk in, not even a moment later. All are dressed better than any gala Bruce could have dragged them off, too. He is rather impressed that Damian is a red suit that makes even Bruce pale in comparison. Then again, he is the only one besides Alfred who has an eye for such things.

"Has he already proposed, or is he doing it at dinner table and were all supposed to act supirse?" Duke asks while sitting down. "I want to know what kind of face I should have prepared"

"The clone has asked Father for his blessing in his courtship with Timothy. He knew we would have figured out his plans when that blunder. It is no surprise." Damian huffs. Dick knows he's just upset that his big brother is going to get married and move out soon. He's adorable when he's territorial.

"I can confirm that Kon hasn't asked yet." Steph announces, strutting into the room in all her purple gown glory. Behind her, the Row sbilings wander in with matching celtic blue suits, making Dick grin. It's always nice to see people appreciate the best color. "Tim isn't the type of person to not show off his ring whenever he has a chance."

"I've always wanted to see a real-life popersoal!" Jarro gasps, flying into the room with his own little suit on. It's a nice black with green undertones just like Bruce's.

He lands in the miniature chair with a dinner dining set Alfred had special ordered for him.

It sits on top of where a regular dining set usually is, always the second chair on Bruce's left, because he is literally the favorite. Bruce denies it, but they all see the tender smile he throws the floating star.

The Wayne kids know. Jarro is too precious and hilarious, so none of them mind that he's the favorite. In fact, Dick has half the mind that he's the favorite of the majority of the family.

Jason leans over to pat Jarro's head, grinning when the little starfish swears. He adores when the kid randomly curses out of Aldred's hearing range.

"Shh, they're coming!" Cullen says from where he was lingering by the door, hoping to see Tim and Kon. He always looked up to the older boys as someone who had been forced into the closet for his own protection.

Seeing people like him helped ease the fear, and Dick feels his smile wideing when Cullen scrambles back to his seat. He's so excited he's practically in the Speed Force.

Alfred opens the door first, stepping to the side to allow the guest to enter first. Dick feels himself sit up straighter, the moment really setting in, Kon is going to propose to his younger brother.

His little Timmy is growing up-

"Wow, this place is big!" A child says, running into the room. Who the heck is he? "It's amazing, Dad!"

"Slow down. You don't want to fall." Tim laughs, rubbing the stranger's hair with a soft smile.

"It's okay, Dad. I'm strong!" The boy flexes his tiny arms. Tim laughs again as Kon crouches down to the little boy's height.

"Woah! Look at all those musceles. You're going to help me protect your dad, son?"

"Yeah Pa, I'll be the strongest super or robin ever!"

"Tim? Who might this lovely chum be?" Bruce cuts in, voice slightly strained. No one calls him out on it since they are staring wide eye at the tiny little boy who looks like an exact copy of Tim at age five.

Dick knows because he was one of the few in the Wayne's who saw Tim at that age. He's practically a clone to oh no.

Dick thinks he's having a heart attack.

Tim looks up at them before a brillient glowing smile breaks across his face. "Everyone, Kon and I have an announcement to make!"

Kon wraps an arm around his waist, sending adoring looks to man in his arms before they both hold up their left hand.

There are twin silver bands on both of their fingers. "We got married in Las Vegas, and we have a son! I like you all to meet Danny Drake-Kent! I made him when I thought Kon was dead."

"I am Danny, clone of Kon-el and Tim Drake. Fear me if you dare!" His voice squeaks. Squeaks.

Scratch that, Dick knows he's having a heart attack.

You can hear a pin drop in the silence his announcement cause, as Danny puffs up his chest and floats a few inches off the grown.

Oh, great heavens, Dick is an uncle.

"A fellow clone, son!" Jarro cheers from his little table. He slams two of his star points on the table to a beat that he speaks to. "One of us. One of us."

Danny's blue eyes land on the star fish and widen. He raises both arms into the air chanting back. "One of us. One of us. One of us!"

"It's awesome is what it is!" Steph cries, jumping up from her seat. "Hi, Danny! I'm you, Auntie Steph! I'm the cool one."

"Isn't this lovely? Master Tim not only has a husband but a child as well. Unlike some Masters." Aldred doesn't quite glare at Bruce, but he doesn't have to. The Waynes know who he means as Bruce wince.

Danny pauses in his chanting to look her up and down, staring pointily at her plum colored dress before humming. "That's a bold statement for an eggplant."

Steph gapes at him as Tim roars with laughter.

Oh, Dick is going to love this kid. He leaves his seat, trying to get to his nephew as the rest of the family attempts to do the same. Damain makes alarming threats to Kon, letting him know he would easily take him out if he detects a hint of mistreatment to his brother and new nephew.

The Waynes act like they can't hear the threat because they all have their own versions of the shovel talk prepared. They just have to get the clone alone.

It's a nice dinner.

[luludeluluramblings]

Conner Kent's Obsession with Smalltown!Reader

A/N: I saw a few people liking the Superfam stuff and finally went nuts attempting this Conner bit. I tried. I tried so hard. I added dialogue. I'm used to the YJ Conner, but this is my attempt at Comic Conner. If he's OOC, oops. Yeet. (I attempted to research, I swear.) Might edit this some later.

A/N: I write Reader with an accent. One, cause that's how I talk. Two, cause I like it like 'dat.

A/N: I'm also almost done with Part Seven, but I'm adding dialogue to that too to make the breaking point a tad bit more impactful. I've never really written dialogue before.

Warnings: Slight Yandere themes. Romantic Yandere. (Very subtle.)

Conner’s run-ins with Reader always seemed to piss Tim off. Especially after Tim started researching into Reader. He would occasionally always beg Tim to invite Reader to hang out. And, he would find himself rejected every single time. Before it was probably due to Tim being dramatic. Now, he certain of this, it's because Tim dramatic and jealous overprotective.

On other occasions, he'd just by pass Tim, leaving him to his cases (and creeping) so hecould sneak and bother reader. They’re kinda cute, in his opinion. Of course they call him a big city boy and said he clearly lived off of his daddy’s money. Which was only kind of wrong. But, they way they said it made his a trail of heat crawl down his spine.

After some time had passed, he knew that Tim and the other members of the family were suspicious about him coming to the manor so much. He never tried to hide his reasons There was no point in hiding behind weak excuses. He respected the Bats too much to even think he could fool them. Plus, lying to the Bats was a good way to get stabbed with a kryptonite knife. Even though they had made it pretty clear that they disapproved of him coming around so often, He was still going to keep visiting. Could they really blame him? It wasn’t his fault he was enamored so easily. 

He kept his distance just a bit. Like he was silently (commanded) requested. He could tell he made the newest addition to the family a bit uncomfortable. And, he understood. The clone thing was kinda freaky after all.

Well, at first he had assumed it was because he was a clone. That would make any normal person feel a bit weird. But, then he heard them keep call him that nickname. City boy. The way it rolled off their tongue and how often it was said was clearly a sign. They weren’t bothered by the clone thing. They just didn’t like his personality. He could fix that. That wasn’t that hard. He was adaptable.

So when he approached them again, for the million time, he tried to play up the cool and collected act. Going as far as to emulate the Batman. Which, surprising made the ice break. When they laughed at him.

☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️

"No, seriously why are you acting like that?" You're still giggling at how hard he was trying to play up the serious act. Cause that's all it was. You don't doubt he could genuinely be serious for a moment, but this wasn't one of those moments.

"I'm just letting you see a different side of me, is all." Conner replies, trying to keep it up even though he had been quickly caught.

"You mean the imaginary side, city boy? I didn't realize you liked to play pretend." Another teasing snort. God, how you needed that laugh.

"I'm not pretending."

"Yeah, you are."

"No, I'm not."

"Yeah."

"No."

"Yes, you are. Don't be lyin' to me now. Or, Imma start gettin' upset."

"Okay, okay... How could you tell?" He conceded after a moment. The way he scratched the back of his head suited him much more than that little Oscar performance he was putting on a few seconds prior.

"I'm observant." Comes the mock arrogant reply. It was hard to give him a cold shoulder when he just made you laugh so genuinely in the last few weeks.

"Oh, look who's playing pretend now." The snark on his tongue doesn't have any heat, but it does bring you some relief. A bit of much needed normalcy.

Maybe it's the fact that the loneliness has slowly crawled into your chest and burrowed it's self deep in that hollow part of you, but it's easy to let your guard down around him for once. You had noticed his efforts to get to know you before, and maybe you let those preconceived notions cloud your little head. But, there was no need for them anymore. The twinge of glee he sparked was enough to burn them away and make you pause before you would rebuild those walls of yours.

"Are you saying I'm not observant?"

"Yep."

"The audacity!" The outrage nothing more than a sham. A simple way to fill the air between them. Cause even if the talk was small, just the hint of it filled something in you. That didn't make your curiosity fade, however. "But, seriously, why are you impersonating Bruce? And in his own house, no less."

The brief silence that washes over you both has you already regretting this. Had it really so long since you've had a proper conversation that you were this out of practice?

When he finally speaks again, it is gives you relief and more regret.

"I just wanted to finally get your attention."

Well, doesn't that make you finally fit in with the rest of your family?

Your tongue brushes over your teeth in an attempt to get the lead coating that made your words weigh heavy in your mouth off of it.

"I'm sorry, Conner. I- I've been smallminded haven’t I?"

"No, I get it. The whole clone thing is freaky." He starts, a light flush on his cheeks. He wasn't expecting an apology, and especially one so soon and so heartfelt.

"Oh, yeah, that... Really it didn't have anything to do with it. I kinda just thought you were a typical concrete jungle flirt. Momma warned me about men like you." You try to hide your sheepishness by adding humor to your voice, praying he catches your sincerity under all the different layers.

He catches something, judging by the beaming smile Conner gives you.

"Really? I had hoped it wasn't, ya know, that."

"Nah, nah. It wasn't. Still, I am sorry." You assume silence is about to befall the pair of you again, but he doesn't let it happen.

"My family owns a farm out in Kansas, you know?" The cheeky grin on his face screams that he's going to be getting his revenge in the form of mild bullying.

"No!" The resounding smack of your palm hitting your forehead nearly echoes in the halls. "I feel even worse now."

"So much for being observant, little detective."

"I never claimed to be no detective. But, I might be more... oblivious then I initially implied..."

Now, it's Conner's turn to guffaw at you.

"The audacity."

"Don't you throw my words back at my. I can't handle it." You can't help by click your tongue. There's hardly any annoyance from your words. "I really misjudged you."

"It's fine! I figured you might still be adjusting to Gotham and the whole Wayne lifestyle. Tim mentioned you're from a pretty small town when I started bugging him about you." He's clearly playing up the charm, but you let it work on you.

"More like I'm still suffering from culture shock." Slowly, you can feel this conversation starting to shift to something deeper than surface level. Things that haven't been allowed into the open air start to ripple underneath.

And, he takes that chance to draw it out.

"Still?" Empathy mixing into his tone. Those icy blue eyes looking incredibly warm. You'd never really taken the time to look at him. Sure, you knew he was attractive. Hell, everyone that seemed to show up at the manor was attractive. But, now you were finally looking at him. Too focused were you in taking in his appearance for the first time, that you completely missed the way those eyes shined with opportunity and desperate want.

"Yeah, still. It's... different."

"Different as in the food's a little weird or different as in the people are a little weird?"

"It's all a little weird, and it's... kinda... lonely?" You can't help the wince. You really don't wanna trauma dump on someone who you had initially misjudged. He didn't deserve that.

But, as he moves closer you can't help it. That desolate part of you longing for comfort when you haven't had it in such a long time and the way he's giving you all this undivided attention when you can barely catch Alfred in the halls these days fills that acute craving in your gut.

"Lonely?" God, the concern in his voice doesn't make you want to cry, but it does make you want to choke

"I... I think it's not here that's different. I think it's me that's too different." The way he sucks a breath in after the words leave your mouth makes you want to backtrack immediately. "I'm so sorry. God damn, am I mess right now."

"No. No. No. You are fine." The reassuring words oddly sound more like a purr, but they capture your attention all the same. "I get it. I really really do."

Why does he have to give you such a disarming smile. He's practically beaming at you now. There's a festering tension blooming around them like spores.

"You are really not helping me fell less like a jerk to you now." The click of your tongue attempting to defuse the budding blooms.

"Hey, if you're feeling guilt... you could, maybe... let me take you out for dinner sometime? Just to make it up to me."

After a stunned moment of thought, you finally find the words to reply.

" Honestly, I'd-"

"CONNER!" Tim's sudden interruption sends the words crawling back down your throat.

"Tim." He calls back in a cool greeting, but he strangely doesn't step back from you. Which is nice. You haven't had anyone close to you other than Dick and a few of your remaining friends at Gotham Academy. And Damian, Cassandra, and Duke get a bit huffy, or in Damian's case murdery, when they are within an arms reach of you.

"Sorry, am I interrupting anything? Conner and I had plans for the day." Tim's pleasant voice sends a wave of unease over you. He's not staring at you when he speaks. Just Conner. It's annoying how he's ignoring you despite you being right. In. Front. Of. Him.

But, then he does finally look at you and his dark grey eyes soften ever so slightly. You're not too mad. Clearly he's exhausted, judging by the bruises under his eyes. There's still a slight reflection in them as he's gaze meets yours, despite how dry the appear. Probably from looking at a computer too much.

"You really shouldn't bother with this guy. He's not worth it." The words are clearly meant to be joking. Casual banter between two close friends. But, you can't help thinking they come off a bit strong.

Conner seems to bristle at them, but he does brush them off.

"That's right, we are hanging out today. Can you blame me for getting distracted, though?" That cocky smirk of his is back, and he actually touches your shoulder. It makes you feels warm, but like a prize at the same time.

All Tim seems to do in response is twitch, but giving nothing away. His grey eyes going steely as they drift to Conner's hand.

When the moment finally passes, Conner lets his hand fall. You can feel it grazing down your back as he pulls away. Slow, like he's trying to strike a match and light something inside you.

"I'll see you later, sweetheart. Just think about my offer and get back to me on it!" Conner calls out as Tim storms behind him. Both heading in the direction of the library.

☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️

As soon as their in the Batcave, Conner can tell he probably pushed it too far. Not that he has any regrets. He finally got somewhere and confirmed all of his previous theories about Reader. They were so adorable apologizing to him, and so deliciously sweet about it too.

He should've realized Tim was watching them, though. Dude was a creep. He maybe his best friend, but he's still a damn creep.

As expected, the rest of the family is also giving him the patented Bat-glare when he sees them. But, as he stated, he has no regrets. He's not stupid enough to stick around, though. He saw Jason loading a suspicious looking green bullet into the chamber of his gun. And, while he knows Tim wouldn't kill him, he's not so sure about the rest of them.

He's confirmed what he's wanted, what he's already suspected. They're absolutely perfect for him and ripe and raw.

[dunanana]

Hi.

Just an ask after I gave one of your sketches some thought after drawing my own OC getting absolutely destroyed by Wukong numerous times (not in the NSFW way): how many times has Birdie tried killing Wukong for messing with her? Not just with arrows but maybe trying to yeet him into the ocean or something else?

Omg IS UR OC OKAY? 😭whyyy __ He actually volunteered to be target practice after he gave her the earrings and taught her to use it cause what better target than an immortal one? she should be honored he's gracious enough to let her do that to the great sage 😩

She was hesitant but after a few pranks pulled on her, she was all too eager to do so 🤭

He's a proud teacher! He's a pretty good one too if u look past the pranks and taunts- He tests her patience and he tests her focus and speed at the same time (and its fun) and he makes it challenging every time! This made Birdie an excellent archer in the process lmao it's his way of making sure she can hold her own if it ever reaches that point.

She never really does this out of malicious intent but when ur dealing with an immortal, arrows are kinda like pinches at that point-

As for other attempts to get under his skin, trust me she did try 🤣

He's fine don't worry 🤭

[sims3fiend]

Some dumb sims 3 updates/stuf

Or, how to develop severe brain damage in 10 easy steps.

Sooo… This is going to be more of a blog post than anything of any real substance, more of a whinge with maybe a few teasers for some stuff I may or may not release (probably not). Feel free to skip if you're after hot tips or coherent writing.

Stutter "fixer"

Sooooo…. The sims 3 has some stutter issueeesss… Incredible discovery, I know! I started looking at remedying them with settings, found some hidden settings that help reduce some of the issues but that can only do so much when the game was made in 2009 for 2009 computers.

So I had a looky at some things I thought could be causing it, mainly WinAPI functions because that's the easier route (h-haha…), and started to try to "optimize" some of the more common ones:

ReadFile: Was the first, and looking at the sheer volume of like 12783972198 calls a milisecond every time you move the camera, I thought surely I can speed it up a little r-right. Not really. I tried all sorts of… interesting things, file caching in memory, implementing the overlapped flag (took ages), etc. Oh and the performance increase? Literally nothing. It's called weirdly from wherever it's called and so we must suffer.

Threads: So, I had a look at other areas that were potential targets for speedup, ran an actual profile and it showed a problem areas namely threads and some other stuff I don't remember. ZwWaitForMultipleObjects and WaitForSingleObject take up a lot of time, so I very poorly attempted to optimize them, adding some timeout optimizations (and a bunch of other failed attempts). Despite being the most insane, this actually worked, and I got like a 40% speed increase in a very very niche metric that did not noticeably effect the game one single bit. I plan to combine all my failures into a single script eventually, maybe once combined they'll do something…

Actual insanity - Memory IPC: Then I had an idea, everyone hates e12, why don't we shove the games memory into another process and that'll fix it. No brain moment. No clue what past me was thinking, for some reason I thought you could like, access another processes memory if it was spawned from it, but uhh.. no, that's not how things work… I tried a few other things in a similar vein but it just crashed and crashed, so for now I'm just gunna work on:

Alloc/free mee - Current insanity: Currently, I'm still working on VirtualAlloc and VirtualFree (which is what I was redirecting to another process), but more from an optimizing memory usage standpoint than a… whatever the IPC thing was. There's a lot of things to try, and I've had some luck in some areas and some abysmal failures in others. There's a few promising functions calling VirtualAlloc/Free that seem to be potentially pointing towards memory leaks (004e54d0), but I'm too dumb to investigate that. At the moment, I'm going mostly just gathering more logs which takes forever and hurts my brain real bad.. On testing there's like 180 allocs that we could probably yeet no problem, which is like 750mb saved… Maybe idk.

I have plenty of ideas for deduplication, memory pool implementations to reduce churn/fragmentation, shoving things aggressively into pagefiles if they're not being used, etc. etc. Basically, there's a lot of avenues to explore, and I feel like there's potential… though I've definitely said that before and been dead wrong so…

Anyway, rambling over. I plan to release a dumb little renderer settings mod maybe-soon-ish that'll let you do dumb stuff that might be useful for reshade like turn shadows/drop shadows off and post processing off and on. I guess I could add max lots and other settings eventually too since they're static values.... Might also do a mythbusting post for some performance "tweak" stuff I see thrown around that isn't super accurate but I also don't want people to be angry at me so maybe not.

Sorry to whoever read all this, but also thanks :)

[laurey257]

Good Omens fanfic recs that ease the pain. (All complete, canon-compliant)

I am an avid reader and I’ve been combing the floods of new (awesome) things hitting Archive and similar to find what best eases the pain of That Episode. Here’s the best canon-compliant and complete ones that give some soothing to the angst of our angel and demon parting:

**This was a hard decision but I am excluding works in progress since they need time to mature—all these are complete /compliant and can be invested in without fear.**

Jesus, Etc.

This one had me howling.  Crowley runs into a frantic Aziraphale with Jesus at a Barbenheimer premiere who he is frantically keeping busy to prevent the Second Coming.  A battle of the wills with pop songs in the Bentley, Taylor Swift, Kenergy, sushi, a nativity play and a magic show are the least of the insanity that comes next.  (Kudos for the awesome cameo from Mrs. Sandwich.)

To the Universe

This one is a 22-chapter, complete, canon-compliant season 3 full arc that can take the edge off for everyone who is internally screaming that we have years to wait to see all this resolve.  Really can’t say enough about this one.  It tied up every loose end.  Certain parts reminded me of Pratchett and the ending had me on the edge of my chair and cheering out loud.  (bonus extra in a hilarious treatment of Jesus in Tadfield that has him turning himself into a teen named Dave.) This could have been season 3 in another timeline.

Separate Ways

A sweet, short little one where Aziraphale has Muriel checking up on a devastated Crowley from the bookshop, and they finally at least talk.  No resolution, but it felt so nice to read. 

The Second Coming

One-shot (but around 7000 words in chapter format) that is canon-compliant.  Aziraphale “awakens” in the elevator (think ox ribs but sexually) and yeets himself back to earth to roger Crowley six ways from Sunday.  Smutty, so don’t read this one aloud to your parents.  (naked apology dance reference in here made my eyes fall out.)

Heaven is not fit to house a love

A sweet little one with a *small* deviation from canon (that seemed ok because they have a good point.) Crowley had never told Aziraphale about the way the angels managed his trial OR about what he saw in the Heavenly files with Muriel.  He jams his way into the elevator (telling the Metatron to get the next one) and tells him.

Not for all my Little Words

An adorable one where Aziraphale, realizing he screwed up, chases Crowley through loudspeakers and other people’s phones through Europe using famous love quotes until he gets his attention (and some forgiveness.)

Everywhere

Oh so lovely! A longer one-shot where Azi realizes that management is not what he cracked it up to be (they tell him nothing.) So he saves Crowley instead from a Heavenly asassination attempt. (Maggie, nina and anathema help!)

A Proper Apology

One where the Angel simply calls over and over until they really talk.  (Or imagine the idiots simply just used the phone.)

Cause you like me too much and I like you

A sweet little one where Aziraphale quietly resigns, has a chat with Gabriel and Beez in the bookshop, and does the apology dance.

A sweet little daydream Azi has in the elevator about apologizing to Crowley in the Ressurectionist pub  before waking up and realizing oh crap he is still in Heaven.

Did I miss any other good ones?  Tell me?

[krysmcscience]

At long last: either an alternate explanation for or continuation of my prior comic regarding how Bill was ABSOLUTELY naked in Ford's karaoke night drawing. (Because errors in art do not exist. Artists do not make mistakes. So if you see any in this comic, No You Do Not.)

I am so normal about these old dorks.

I'm not really clear on exactly when Bill started throwing his desperation book at Ford just like a needy ex do, but I find it extremely funny to imagine it happening literally the day of or after the makeshift funeral. Bill just gets this weird sense of 'Ford is taking steps to move on' and CANNOT FUCKING ABIDE.

I hope you enjoy all the goofy things I added to each page of Bill's sad spieling. (Everything SHOULD be readable so long as you view the full size, but I have added basically this whole little fanfic in the image descriptions, LMAO, which lays out all the little written notes and such.) Also don't ask how Bill managed to sneak that vampire pen in there. I have no idea, and honestly? I don't wanna know.

Oh, and a little bonus comic:

Of course Bill would take it as flirting. Because between the two of them, Bill is the bigger masochist By Far. :)

Also I have continued applying The Good Place logic to any of Bill's attempts to swear. Case in point, one last bonus image, this time with a motivational line from my slapdash Theraprism OC, EV-01:

Yes, its name is just 'love' backwards. No, I will not be taking any feedback on this. Yes, EV-01 was only ever assigned to Bill's case due to the Theraprism being desperate to make some progress in rehabilitating him. No, it did not work anywhere close to staff's expectations - Bill didn't even appreciate EV-01's matching fondness for bowties! (He claimed the fondness to be "cultural appropriation" and insisted he'd been traumatized by it.)

Anyway, if you like my stuff, reblogs are very much appreciated, and if you really really like it, perhaps consider my commissions or yeeting a teeny tiny tip my way? I am trying to recoup over 500 dollars in vet bills, ahaha... 🙃

In other news, I loved all the fun tags people added to the prior naked-karaoke comic (such as 'the hat and bow-tie stay ON during sex' and the classic '[insert keysmash here]', as well as the many amused/bewildered remarks about how I either made the bricks a piece of clothing or just straight up peeled Bill's skin off). However, I think my favorite thing by far was the several people losing their shit over the fact that I gave Bill toes. Like, excuse me? The magical talking triangle can have fingers but not toes??? Since when was that a rule????? 🤣 (Also the one person who reblogged with the cropped panel where Bill's fishnets pants are falling off to ask why Bill peed himself. Dude, I want to examine your brain...?)

Okie-dokie, I'm sick of looking at all of this stuff now and I'm off to go to work, after which I will either scribble some more goofy "Billford" comics or perhaps draw my lame human!Bill in Situations, idk yet. Maybe I'll even finally draw more than just a single other person's human!Bill...? Who knows, but I sure hope I can mix it up a little and not turn whatever I draw into a month-long fukken project. >:\

[truly-quirkless]

"Yeah...interviews suck. They're nicer planned, but they still suck." It always felt like a performance evaluation to Fin. Ever since that first time they'd ended up on national news, heralded by All Might as 'the Quirkless Hero'...it had sucked. Their anxiety ran wild, their hands froze, and a few times, they'd nearly cried from the raw nerves of it all.

Interviews were evil.

"What---?" Fin's voice devolved into a quiet squeak. The summer camp incident had been a few weeks back- and a week or so before that, Fin and Yagi had been at I-Island...so all of their intimate encounters so far were fresh- still burning in the back of Fin's mind. Their face rapidly began to turn pink- darkening at the memories. There was something to be said when both themself and their lover had high libidos. "-I mean,...I..." They'd talked to Mode about such topics before with no change of emotion, but it seemed bringing Yagi into the equation...turned them into an instant mess.

They took a breath in, trying to calm their thoughts. Damn, though- now Mode had them thinking about it.

"--D-don't worry, I don't do the whole 'setup dates' thing." Oh thank God. A topic change- and to something a bit less...flustering. "My own parents always joked that I liked any dude I hung out with when I was a kid, and I'm not particularly fond of forced dates, or being 'offered' partners. So you don't need t'worry." They waved a hand.

"Why didn't you say sooner?" Fin shook their head. They weren't the best at reading others- but they felt bad that they hadn't noticed Mode's exhaustion. "C'mon then.- N' lunch'll be on me, if y'want anything more than boba tea." They started turning the two's path, making a steady curve that transformed into a beeline for U. A.'s main building- specifically, the cafeteria.

“That makes sense. I don’t like being interviewed either, planned or not.” It was better to let her mom or sisters do the talking. Pe still hated the concept of having to give lectures in her class. She would avoid it at all costs if she could.

“Oh?” Pe teased, “Do his eyes light up a lot when you’re intimate then?”

She played with her hair. “I’m not really looking for anyone right now. I think I need to concentrate on my teaching… and recovery. Please don’t hook me up with anyone.” Her mother did this constantly. It was so tiring.

The woman nodded. “Yes. Let’s do that. I think I need to sit down, too. I’m still in a lot of pain since I left the hospital.” Pe was on plenty of meds, but her face shown how exhausted she was, even with make-up on.

[fancyhats-and-fennelsbuds]

I would like to bring under the spotlight frigging Warrior Queen Kidagakash Nedakh's and Liuthenant Helga Sinclair's never ever spoken-about brutal force

Because 1) my sis in Messiah Kidagakash Nedakh

... rapidly stun three heavily ww1 geared soldiers with bare hands, wholly yeeting one over her head that flung like a bag of potatoes while easily getting the higher ground with another and attempting a first melee fatal pincushioning for their persistency at fighting her back

Not one

but two soldiers, are needed to restrain her.

Secondly 2) ! ! !

Then there this Chad

Where two soldiers were needed to four-hand work to keep still a full berserk'd Kidagakash this smug butt needed just one

Again. She's currently restraining someone that got to be held down by two people before

And Helga is.... ehm..! Casually smugly posing? She's making pass, a firm clasping of a set of arms (Kida's) that made a grown up ass soldier fly thru air, as a light workout?

Barely flincing for the entirety of Kida's hostage situation?

While casually finding time for doing a cowboy smarty nerdy trick with the a pistol?

Girl

Lets's be real. These two are built like brickhouses

The only capable to match them in force is Rourke (another, that withstanded stoicly Helga's, Helga's..! Three mortal kombat kicks in the face. Like dude. You have to be made literally of stone to keep up with that. Hehe stone. Because he..! Because he! Heh. No? Uh. Ok no).

Yeah...

That all for today's talk (expected time used for this, 10 minutes. Reality this took an hour and half at least)

[l-in-the-light]

The most embarrassing series of posts about Lawlu you will ever read: edition Whole Cake Island (part 12)

Lawlu in Whole Cake Island? There is none! Actually... do we really need Law to be present to analyze it, come to think of it? Luffy is really all we need; to watch his behaviour, things he says, his determination, to guess how Law's influence would show and how partying ways with him (even if temporarily) would impact Luffy.

This is the Alice in Wonderland Arc of One Piece, which means Luffy's main struggle will be to face himself, his own weakness, fears, and maybe even his own self-hatred. Which is why this time it won't be the usual scrutinizing analysis of frame by frame, but instead I will take a deep-dive into Luffy's mind. Are you ready? :D

Luffy starts Whole Cake Island arc in a rush. Because why wouldn't he feel in a rush? There's a wedding to stop! There's a chance they won't make it in time, after all. But... seeing how Zou ended, there's probably one more reason why Luffy is so irritated and wants to get things done as fast as possible... there will be someone waiting for him in Wano, alongside the rest of Luffy's own crew. Luffy could tolerate being seperated from his own crew for two years, but this two weeks trip to Whole Cake Island seems like a torture to him. What changed exactly between timeskip and now? Oh, right, Law got added into the picture ;)

"See? She didn't have any problem with my yeeting!" and I wish he could add "Law also had no trouble after I yeeted us in Dressrosa, you should be more hardboiled like him!", because I swear, this feels like the thing he actually means. And he is right, Law hated being yeeted, but he dealed with it just fine in the end, keeping his clear mind and sense of direction intact.

And then, out of nowhere, Luffy gains an interest in cooking. Luffy, of all people! The very same Luffy who thought a musician is more essential on the crew than a cook!

He even compares Nami's nutritional knowledge to a doctor instead of a cook. For Luffy, a cook is just someone who makes your food look and taste extra great, but it's not neccessary for a kid who grew up in a jungle eating everything the way it comes or simply by roasting it over a fire. So why is he suddenly so interested in cooking?? Is he missing Sanji that much? Is he trying to make his crew miss Sanji so the reunion is more emotional? Good guesses, but they have one flaw: they don't take Luffy's personality enough into account.

Back in East Blue, Luffy agreed to recruit a cook before a musician only because his crew wanted one and also because he's a freaking glutton.

"You guys are really rude, I made this food for you!" now that doesn't fit with Luffy's personality of "I want to eat all the meat". Suddenly, it's for them, hm?

Then he tries his own "kitchen sink curry", spits it out, shouts that's it's inedible and flips the table! Why so mad? Oh yeah, because as we learn soon after, he tried cooking multiple times and it's still something that can't be eaten. He tried so many times that he wasted a stock of food they had that was supposed to last them for a week, for all of them! And it's all gone in one day.

Luffy's frustration is understandable then, because this is what he considers to be "his best attempt". As we learn from SBS, Luffy's best dish is just a bowl of meat (in other words: pieces of meat put in a bowl lol), which means he would not prepare "curry" or any sort of exquisite dish for himself. He indeed did this dish with others in mind. He would be more likely to just roast whatever he caught and shove it towards them, asking "you want some?", if it was only about him.

Despite his constant failures, he's still not getting discouraged and wants to learn how to cook edible things for people to enjoy. Nami though stops him and tells him "to never go into the kitchen again", ouch. They have been starving for days as the result of Luffy's "cooking attempts" and Luffy almost lost his life as the result (eating poisonous skin of a fish they finally caught), so her reaction is understandable. But this should make us realize that Luffy, thanks to this whole (mis)adventure, understands Sanji better without even realizing it. After all, Sanji was also told to "never cook again" by his father.

But I think this adventure has one more meaning. Whole Cake Island is basically a tale about the good and bad sides of food industry, but also how food creates connections between people. And I think XxXholic covered the latter part better than I could ever put in words, so forgive me for the unexpected crossover here. You don't need to know XxXholic, its plot or characters to be able to follow the quotes, they also don't spoil anything from the plot, so don't worry. We're just following one of the many, many side characters there.

First of all, if you want to repay a debt or show your gratitude, the best way is to offer food and good drink. And the best way to do it, is to offer stuff you cooked yourself, because they require your own time and effort, and include your feelings (of gratitude and love) for the person you cooked it for. If someone does you a favour, it's a good idea to say "thanks" by preparing a dish they like, for example.

"I would like to cook with you and then eat it together. And then I would really like to know more about you. And for you to learn about me, as well" says the protagonist to one of his clients. Cooking together is a big thing because it creates an equal, mutual bond: you get to know me, I get to know you, and we can both try to become better at cooking together, but also better people for each other as well. Because by cooking we learn more about what the other person likes and dislikes, but also about their personality: their usual way of problem solving, about their patience, flexibility, stubborness, ability to learn etc. Your prefered way of cooking can also reflect your personality this way and you try to offer your best through a dish you put a lot of effort to make, for someone to enjoy.

You can learn a lot about yourself as well through cooking. If you compare your own cooking to someone else's, you can realize your own personality traits you wished you would have never noticed (for example impatience, like Luffy flipping the table in anger: even Nami called him out on it, Sanji would not approve of that action!). You might also realize that someone preparing food for you did it with lots of feelings, of kindness and love, and that's why that food tastes good. And if in comparison your own food is terrible, bland, without flavour or personality, it just shows you don't really share your own love with the world through the act of cooking. In Luffy's case up there, his food was so terrible (though definitely full of his personality lol) despite him putting in his best effort and feelings. How did it make him feel about himself? Perhaps like he has nothing good to offer to people he loves? But his final reaction is always this: try to be better and do better!

Luffy offering his failed attempts to his crew serves the same purpose: he's offering them what he has, even if the result is disgusting. But this is the kind of person Luffy is at the moment and he has nothing better to offer!

The sidestory in XxXholic has a happy ending, the struggle continues on and the woman's significant other supports her efforts and says they will wait for as long as it takes. Now, what does that have to do with One Piece? The reason this woman couldn't cook something that would taste good wasn't because she's clumsy, or didn't put any effort in or lacked knowledge (she actually studied cooking like it's an university subject, it clearly mattered a lot to her!).

What she lacked in the end was love, not for others, but for herself. She hated herself so much that she believed anything she would do would turn out bad (which is exactly what happened over and over), almost like she was subconsciously self-sabotaging her own efforts. And since she didn't have love for herself she had nothing to give to others either, despite caring for them and being so grateful to people who loved her the way she is, imperfect, disbelieving in her own worth, broken. She just didn't feel like she has anything to offer to all the great people around her.

Sounds familiar?

"What can you do?" Arlong asks Luffy. "You can't do anything, you're a disgrace as a captain". And Luffy proceeds to say he has great people who support him (which means he does not think of himself as great, he knows he lacks in so many ways), but there is one, just one thing he can do for them back: it's to beat up people like Arlong.

And yet despite that, in Whole Cake Island, Luffy attempts to do what he literally can't do: to cook. He knows he can't do it, but he tries it anyway, knowing very well what the end result will be. It's not that he lost his mind. We mustn't forget why he's doing a stealthy mission on WCI. It's exactly because he can't do what he usually does: beat up Big Mom. He promised he won't do it. But what *can* he do then? It's his struggle to become better and get out of his comfort zone, and he starts that from attempting cooking. It won't be the first or last time that he will fight against himself in this arc, even denying things he had the most confidence in. This is the arc in which Luffy loses the sight of what he can and can't do, and needs to come up with a new answer or rediscover the one he already had all along. This is Luffy in a crisis.

Now is that related to Luffy being seperated from Law and dealing badly with it? Or Luffy realizing how much he knows Law has faith in him and he wants to live up to it? Because like we established before, Luffy is doing this stealthy attempt only for the sake of his alliance with Law, he would not bother usually and would just destroy Big Mom because she's in his way. I can only imagine Luffy's inner struggle when he tries to come up with a new solution here but can't get any, nothing works out if he just can't beat up the bad guy and move on. Luffy's later refusal to eat anything that isn't Sanji's cooking, not even the syrup rain, must reflect how Luffy feels about himself in this moment: he feels pathetic and useless and he must hate himself for it.

There's one more angle to it. Luffy suspiciously wants to cook as fast as they're seperated from Law. He thinks nutritional knowledge is something a doctor does and he's impressed with it. Law is a doctor. It's not a stretch to think that Luffy wants to learn something new to impress his favourite person upon return. It's highly likely he wants to cook for Law as well (and he's using his crew for taste-testing for now), because he has feelings of love and gratitude he wants to convey to him, but he doesn't know how to do it. But Luffy always had Sanji who used his cooking exactly for that: to show his feelings of love for people (and was very vocal about it!). Luffy is just trying to do the same, but he realized he can't do it no matter what. By the end of the arc he comes back to terms with himself and finds the old truth again: he will leave the cooking to Sanji and rely on his crew. He can try to be a better person in other ways, but he will keep on searching for a way to show love and gratitude to them.

And we will not talk about Luffy suddenly remembering people smooch each other and talking about it in context of Sanji's wedding, uhum. If that's on his mind all of a sudden when it wasn't even once for last 80 volumes, then you can guess why it suddenly would be. People who love and care for each other smooch, so maybe he was considering... things...

Another odd thing Luffy does, which is to check on the map and comments, frowning "it's weird". He has a point, because we learn later it was a deliberate trap. But he's paying attention here because he tries to be useful and does things he usually wouldn't be doing. Just like with cooking.

Same here. It's probably the first moment in which Luffy realizes that having a longterm plan would be actually a good thing. Yeah, Luffy of all people. That's because he must be thinking "if it was Law, he would definitely have one". I feel like other people were pointing it out to Luffy before, but it's the first time he actually shows that he kinda cares and isn't answering with "I'm just here for the adventure. And become a king of the pirates, no plans included!".

Look here. This is Luffy in a crisis. "I have to get back and I'll destroy everything in my way if I have to!" Not only he's not supposed to destroy everything or beat up Big Mom, which he points out a moment later, but Luffy is clear here, he made his decision: if he can't go back, he will simply get rid of everything on his way. Getting back is the most important thing, everything else be damned.

Except... are we really talking about Sanji here? Get back where, Luffy? To Wano perhaps, where your crew and Law will be waiting?

"I'm not going to die in a place like this!!", "I made him a promise, but it's not here!!". I'm just saying, this applies both to Sanji and the promise Luffy made "to meet up in Wano". And if he wants to get back no matter what, it's because he knows he can't die here, he can't force a certain someone to go through a big loss again. He would rather tear off his arms than not return at all and break his promise.

And we get Sanji with his "I didn't tell you to wait..." and Luffy just laughs in reply. This particular laugh he used only once before, btw, and I don't recall anywhere else:

When he was telling Zoro how much he's worrying about Sanji. Because why wouldn't Luffy know that Zoro and Sanji are the most important people for each other? Zoro is his best friend and his first crewmate, Luffy just knows what's in his heart, the same way that Zoro probably knows who is so important for Luffy as well.

Do you still think Luffy-Sanji scene was *only* about Luffy and Sanji? That the whole promise talk was only about Sanji? And not two particular people waiting for both of them in Wano? It was always about both reasons.

Luffy says he can't be the king of the pirates without Sanji. And demands that Sanji says how he really feels (which is "to go back on Sunny" ❤). Imagine if Luffy said both of those lines to Usopp in Water 7. Maybe a lot of the conflict could have been avoided. Especially if Luffy would also follow his very own advice, because he was not saying his true feelings in the quarrel with Usopp. What changed since Water 7 in Luffy? A lot, actually. Ace, timeskip, Dressrosa, Law... All those things are huge milestones in Luffy's development. But there's also the promise he made. He promised Zoro his crew to bring Sanji back. And that promise also changed everything.

WCI is also the first arc in which Luffy says he is ready to drop everything, even his own dream, and go save whoever needs to be saved for his crew's sake. It's very ironic how in this scene he also needs to struggle against himself, this time with his enormous hunger, that seems to sabotage his ironclad determination. For once Luffy doesn't do things for food and that despite the whole arc being exactly about food. That's how serious he is.

Now we have to talk about the alliance with Bege. Here is Luffy's initial reaction: "what an awful person", "Bege is gonna get it!". He does not like Bege at all, he also wants to punch him for what Bege did to Pekoms. In other words, Luffy doesn't think Bege is a good person, at all.

But just a moment later, when Jimbei tells him "you should work together with Bege", Luffy changes his mind immediately. He's all up for this alliance. His crew, that has been with Luffy the longest (Nami and Sanji) can't believe their ears. What an interesting change, isn't it? Like I argued at the beginning of this post, Luffy has to do things differently this time instead of doing what he usually does. The problem is, he's not good at anything else than "beating the main bad guy". That's why in this case he's determined to do something he would usually never do. And forgive me for the callback again to XxXholic, because I can't resist:

Luffy has the same idea as the protagonist here. "This is all I can do", and "if this person was with me, they would be able to find a better way". In other words, Luffy agreed to this alliance because he thinks this is something Law would do as well. Luffy is constantly wondering in Whole Cake Island how Law would handle the situation and he knows he can't come even close to his level, but at least he will try to follow in his footsteps.

Of course Luffy wants at first to punch Bege for Pekoms. He's still trying to make this alliance a friendship, and if he hits Bege then they will be even, so they can try becoming friends. That's basically the idea.

But he doesn't get to do that and in the end, Luffy agrees to alliance based on "common goal" or "allignment of interest". He did not become friends with Bege in the process and didn't make things even between them. This proves Luffy knows what an alliance is and it's not friendship. I wouldn't say this means Luffy finally learned what an actual alliance is (though it's tempting, ngl). I would rather say he always knew that, but he chose to make it a point that whatever he has with Law, is friendship firstmost, alliance second.

And here is Luffy listening to Bege's plan. He's trying, okay. Not his fault he's constantly getting distracted, sidetracked and overfocused on making a silly entrance party trick (jumping out of the wedding cake). Bege is just not Law, and Luffy's tiktok's level span of attention is struggling here, heh. Also please notice Luffy's unusual focus on the smooching lol.

Oh, so that's Luffy's idea for the wedding surprise. He just wanted to do ninja's shadow clonining trick, definitely inspired by Raizou's show in Zou.

Coincidentally, that's the technique that was Law's request and made Law so damn impressed. Yeah, this is for sure a coincidence, that Luffy chose to do it like that, even though he didn't really have to have multiple copies of himself here to make it work. I bet he just thought "if Law would be here, that would impress him, I'm sure!" and I bet he's looking forward to telling him all about this adventure later on and seeing his face.

But it was essenstial for his plan to create chaos! He didn't do it just for fun! Are you sure? Because it was Brook who hid himself in the midst and did the deed with Mother Carmel's photo frame, and Luffy did not tell him to do this. Luffy simply wanted to be cool, okay, he didn't think that far ahead. He was supposed to cause chaos, he delivered.

And in his fight with Katakuri, Luffy is the one who has to have faith. Law had his faith moment in Dressrosa, now it's Luffy's turn.

Luffy found his answer about what he can do and how to become a better person for someone. It's to master his observation haki. Which, coincidentally, is Law's forte.

Luffy's curious, very strict words to Jimbei. "Don't let even death stop you, we'll be waiting in Wano!" It's basically Luffy's own promise he made before leaving Zou, just said in more deadly serious manner. That's because his experience in Whole Cake Island made him realize it himself: he will go back to Wano and not even death can stop him from achieving that. Because he promised that to Law people.

I'm sure for Law this would be indeed the most important thing, not to lose anyone ever again, especially Luffy who he (miraculously) managed to save all the way back in Marineford. I don't know how Luffy knows this or if he knows at all about Law's deepest fear, but he's determined not to die on him, that's for sure.

This is also the first big seperation for Luffy and Law. Luffy deals with it, treating everything like an adventure to tell Law later so it feels like Law is there with him even though he's not. But also treats it like a challenge, to become a better and stronger person so he won't disappoint him.

Still convinced there was no Lawlu in WCI? Oh well, if that's the case then all I can say is: I tried my best :D

If anyone wants to read all the parts of this series without going to my masterpost, then just click "love is a hurricane" tag :3

[ms--lobotomy]

“Yeet a plunger at Horus’s head. 100 points if you get it to stick on first try. The prize is my respect.”

Get bent bald boy

Summary: You attempt to earn Sanguinius's respect.

Word Count: 717

Content Warnings: dumbassery, 40kness,

Image Credit: @squishyowl

Your legs swung off the table, over the wooden floor as you looked at him incredulously. "What?" you asked, tilting your head. He wasn't in his regular armor; he had on a golden robe with a leather bag. "What are you--why points?" Your mouth hung open slightly as you looked up at him and he smirked down at you, his mouth revealing sharp fangs. "Where am I going to find a toilet plunger, anyways?"

Sanguinius reached into his bag. Out came a toilet plunger, just small enough for you to hold. He knelt down and handed it to you, and you loosely wrapped your hands around it before looking back up at him.

"Horus will be here any minute," he whispered. "You're going to need to find a good hiding place. I can distract him, if you want."

"Why am I doing this?" you asked, running your thumb up and down what little of the shaft you could.

"Don't you want 100 points?" he responded.

"100 points for what?"

"..."

"Fine."

You looked around the room for a place to hide, and found a nice little bookshelf. The manuscripts in High Gothic were pretty, and you almost felt bad about using the bookshelf for such a prank. But you swallowed your pride and you looked back at Sanguinius, nodding sagely.

"I'll wait here," you said.

"Good," he replied before he heard a knock at the door. He made a motion, ushering you behind the bookshelf before he turned around and walked forwards. You shrunk behind the books, your eyes peeping through an opening as you held the plunger like a gun.

Horus walked through the door, his steps rumbling the ground underneath you. He wasn't in his armor either, instead opting for a simple linen shirt and leather pants. He smiled at Sanguinius, and Sanguinius fluffed his wings up. Sanguinius made eye contact with you and raised his eyebrows before turning back to Horus.

"Ah, Horus, it's lovely to see you today..."

You watched the two talk at each other about some sort of offensive, where Horus put a little device down on the table and the hologram of a planet showed up. Your muscles tensed. You never liked talk of planetary offenses or whatnot, your job was to document the goings-on of everyday life. Humanize them, a little bit. It was hard when they were talking about planets you'd never heard of, spoke in princely tongues you'd never heard, or even breathed while being 10 feet tall.

You gripped the plunger in your hands. That was all the more reason to lob it at Horus's bald head.

You crept to the side of the bookshelf, careful not to make a sound. Your feet slid against the ground as if to avoid stingrays. The two of them were still entrenched in conversation. Perfect. Horus was facing away from you now, and Sanguinius was at the other side of the table, able to see you but focusing on Horus.

You slid, and slid, before you heard a creak from under you. The floorboard was loose. As soon as Horus turned his head to look, you leapt out from behind the bookshelf, toilet plunger in hand.

"GET BENT, BALD BOY!" you shouted at the top of your lungs as you threw the plunger. It sailed past his head, onto the wall behind Sanguinius, who had begun to let out a belly laugh.

"Wh-" started Horus, looking around before he caught sight of you.

Sanguinius looked at you, merriment in his eyes. "He's such a big target! How could you have missed him?" he asked, leaning onto the table for support.

"I don't know!" you exclaimed as Horus reached over the table and yanked the plunger off of the wall. Some of the paint came off with it, leaving chips where it was.

"Nice throw," he commented, sticking his lower lip out a little as he nodded. "Shame it didn't land on my head."

"You don't need to rub it in..." you mumbled, your hand moving to your upper arm and rubbing slowly.

"Eh, there's always next time," Sanguinius smiled, taking the plunger from Horus's hand and sticking it on his forehead. "You look like a unicorn like this!" he exclaimed as Horus turned back to him.

"I should boil you."

Tag List: @bispecsual @justeverythingnothingelse @bleedingichorhearts @nekotaetae @historitor-bookshelf

[aureliaporter]

family dinner

summary: ayato ropes his long term partner into meeting his family

a/n: he would so do this and i would so slap him for it >:(

cw: gn!reader, like one curse word, meeting the family (ayaka, thoma), mention of yeeting ayato off the cliff his estate is on, clingy!ayato

OF ALL THE ways you were expecting today to go, it was most definitely not like this. but of course, part of ayato’s schedule had finally cleared up, so you suppose it couldn’t be helped.

“(y/n)? could i implore you to be a dear and pass me the salt?”

you shot a scowl at your partner, passing him the salt with a sarcastic, “but of course, my lord. would you like the pepper as well?”

“that would be much appreciated, darling.”

you stared at him, trying to convey how very frustrated you were with him at this moment, but he merely smiled cheerily at you. unbelievable. you passed the pepper as well with a sigh, quickly schooling your features into pleasant indifference as ayaka’s gaze passed to you, her asking about you and her brother’s relationship.

that’s right. instead of taking you on a date to celebrate his night off, or even a stroll or just a quiet dinner together, he had decided it was time you met his sister. which would’ve been completely fine, if he’d just told you beforehand.

so now, you were in awkward conversation with your boyfriend’s sister and his best friend, who had also been invited - but of course ayato had told him just what kind of dinner this was. a half fancy, half casual, completely awkward and stifling dinner. or maybe you were the only one feeling the nerves.

“so, how long have you two been dating?” thoma asked, eager to escape the silence. ayato glanced at you expectantly, as if to tell you to respond.

“oh? did you happen to forget?” you asked ayato, leaning your chin on your hand. “it hasn’t been that long, really-”

“we’ve been dating for a year and four months,” he cut off, pouting at you. his eyes were pleading, as if asking you to punish him for this later on instead of now. you sighed, relenting.

“yeah, a year and four - nearly five, actually - months. he asked me out during the irodori festival,” you said, offering your partner a small smile at the memory. you may want to toss him off the cliff his family estate sat on at the moment, but you still loved him.

“oh, that’s so sweet! how’d he do it?” ayaka asked, leaning forward a bit. you exchanged a glance with ayato, wondering if he wanted to tell the full story. he had ended up embarrassing himself quite badly during it, if you recalled correctly.

“well, i took them on a stroll away from the city, and we watched the star shower that happened on the last night, remember?” he said, smiling at you. “and then i asked them, and they said yes. and they haven’t gotten sick of me yet,” he added, chuckling and nudging you with his shoulder.

you pursed your lips to hold back a laugh, recalling a slightly different version of events. thoma noticed, raising his eyebrows. “oh? is lord kamisato withholding information?” he asked, an amused smile tugging his lips up.

a glare from ayato made thoma cover his smile with his hand, but you plowed on through. “of course he is. have you ever known him to give the full story?” you asked, chuckling softly. ayato’s eyes widened, realizing what you were about to do.

“(y/n), if you have any love for me, you won’t tell them,” he pleaded, holding your hand between both of his. “i’ll buy you boba for three weeks straight. i’ll cancel all my meetings for the next week.”

ayaka and thoma both started laughing lightly at his blatant attempt of bribery. you smirked at your boyfriend, taking one of his hands to kiss his knuckles teasingly.

“i don’t know, hun. i feel like thoma and ayaka deserve the truth, don’t you?” you asked, pressing your lips together to hold back a grin.

he groaned, thudding his head on your shoulder. “please, (y/n), don’t you love me? you can’t go around telling people about that.”

you merely giggled softly, patting his back. “well, your servants already know, don’t they? what’s the harm if two more people find out?”

“my ego will be harmed.”

“it’s far too big to begin with, dear brother,” ayaka chimed in, an amused smile tugging at her lips. “it could do with deflating.”

he shook his head, holding you tighter. “no, it doesn’t need that. my ego is perfect,” he grumbled. you saw thoma and ayaka shared a glance. the head of the kamisato clan is practically a child.

“alright, then i won’t tell them,” you said, trying to tug ayato off of you. “your secrets are safe with me, milord. happy?”

he perked up, pulling back from your shoulder only to tug you into a hug. if he had a tail, you swear you’d see it wagging. “very much so, my dearest. in fact, i think it’s time we retire, hm?” he said, pulling you up from the table - most likely not wanting to give you any chance to change your mind.

ayaka and thoma waved at you two as you left, ayato leading you outside to the garden. he didn’t say anything at first, but he slumped against you, leaning on you from behind and making you stagger underneath his weight.

“did you have to tease me like that?” he asked, his arms wrapped around your shoulders. you could hear the pout in his voice, biting your lip to keep yourself from smiling.

“i don’t know, did you have to keep the fact that i was officially meeting your sister a secret?”

he kept silent, his hold around your shoulders slipping to around your torso. “.. no. i’m sorry,” he said softly, his breath tickling your neck.

you sighed, raising a hand to pat his head. he practically melted into your touch, enjoying the feeling as your fingers danced over his hair. “it’s fine. but next time you pull shit like this, i’m going straight to miko and publishing the story of how exactly you asked me out.”

he whined, clinging tighter to you. “fine, fine. i won’t do it again. just don’t go to miko, please.”

you chuckled, tugging at his hair to get him to whine again, this time in slight pain. “i won’t, alright? truce?” you asked, offering your hand to shake his. he ignored it, nodding and squeezing you tighter. “alright, let go before you manage to cut off my circulation,” you said, attempting to wiggle out of his hold. he grumbled but released you in favor of looping your arm through his.

“shall we go for that stroll you wanted?” he offered, smiling softly at you. you nodded, letting him lead you out of the estate grounds and along the path, lit only by the moonlight.

---

extra:

your combined laughter wound through the air as ayato tugged you along, a smile on his handsome face and his hair a mess from the wind. you tried to reach up to fix it for him, but he caught your hands, not caring for his current appearance and preferring to pull you along the beach. you both stumbled along, too caught up in each other and the star shower. then he was wrapping his arm around your shoulder, pointing to the sky. a gasp left your lips as you watched the millions of lights that whizzed through the sky towards the ground, mimicking rain. you didn’t even notice ayato moving behind you, stepping into the shallow water.

“(y/n),” he said softly, his voice calling your attention. you turned around, surprised to see him holding a small bouquet of flowers - small enough to fit in his sleeves.

“ayato?” you said, tone curious. what was with the flowers?

before he could say anything, he took a step forward, foot landing on a slippery rock and stumbling. you reached forward to help him, but before you could, he was landing in the water with a splash, clothes soaked, flowers hanging limply, and expression shocked.

“i..” he started, an embarrassed flush covering his face. you couldn’t help but chuckle, reaching down to help him up.

“ayato, i know you’ve a hydro vision, but that doesn’t mean you won’t get a cold. c’mon, let’s get you home,” you said, pulling him up and hurrying him back to the kamisato estate. when you attempted to leave, wanting him to rest and then to see him tomorrow, he merely clung to your wrist, pleading with you to stay. so you stayed until he was dry and in his nightclothes, the pair of you sitting on the edge of his bed.

“ayato, i should get going. you need to sleep, and there’s a lot of work with closing the irodori festival tomorrow,” you reasoned, looking up at him. he had been looking rather deep in thought ever since he’d fallen into the water, eyebrows constantly knit together. “ayato?”

he looked up, his expression now determined. “(y/n), i.. have something i’d like to ask. that i couldn’t ask earlier.”

you tilted your head at him, curiosity piquing. “alright. what’s up?”

he reached for your hands, holding them in his and brushing his thumbs over your knuckles. “(y/n), i.. i understand this may seem a bit.. out of the blue, but i have been thinking of this for a while. and i had it planned perfectly, to be honest. earlier, with the star shower, and the flowers, and the beach, and you.. and i was the only thing that wasn’t working right,” he said, sounding oddly self-depreciating for a moment.

“ayato..?” you started, worry painting your tone. “what are you getting at?”

he sighed, squeezing your hands. “(y/n), i.. i would be very happy if you’d do me the honor of courting me.”

silence wrapped around you two for a few seconds, you blinking at ayato as you attempted to form a response. eventually; “you do realize you could’ve just asked me on a date like anybody else.”

he shook his head, squeezing your hands again. “i wanted to be better than anybody else. but i messed that up, too.”

you sighed, tugging one of your hands out of his hold to cradle his cheek. “you’re an idiot,” you said, kissing his cheek. “i would’ve dated you if you sent thoma to ask me in your stead.”

“.. would you actually have?”

“no.”

“.. so we’re official?”

“yes. now go to bed. i don’t want you whining to me about how tired you are tomorrow.”

nevertheless, the pair of you ended up staying awake late into the night, talking until you both passed out. and when ayato whined to you the next morning, you merely passed him a cup of coffee, patting his head gently. who could hate a cutie like him?

ayato is my baby so i am implored to right fanfic about him. however its a slight crime i wrote for him before xiao since xiao is my forever bby but its okay its okay

anyways! hope you guys enjoyed once again! also holy shit im shocked at the love my last two got :0 thank you guys so much!! <3