#[ aka the origin of kai being attracted to people that want to fight him ]

[hiveruled]

Send a 🙌 and I’ll introduce you to an NPC related to my Muse.

@jasperwatching​ 

NATHANIEL ROGERS - The first boy that made Kai realize that he may have sexual attraction towards men ; FC: Wil.l Tud.or

Nathaniel was the stereotypical jock, there's no getting around it. Not exactly the star athlete everyone fawned over, but still very heavily involved with football. He also happened to attend the same church the Anderson family did at the time, so Kai saw him a lot more often than he would've wanted. The two boys (big surprise) never really got along and never communicated outside of having snide back and forth to each other when they’d have to cross paths, with some lowkey verbal bullying on Nathaniel's end.  

Despite this, during his high school years Kai started to notice how a part of him actually enjoyed the bickering as to him it was entertaining, and that he'd feel a slight pang of jealousy watching the other boy be so outwardly physically affectionate towards the slew of girlfriends he went through. At first he chalked this up to being jealous that he didn't get any attention from girls like that, which was certainly a small part of it, but his mind seemed to confusingly be more focused on Nathaniel. 

Nothing ever came of this as it was one-sided and Kai would've never acted upon the lustful feelings/thoughts he had at this point in his life. But it does mark the first time he truly questioned his sexuality, he wouldn't begin to experiment with men until he was in college.

[myfriendsarerealidiots]

Comparing Adaptations

‘Kay so I went on one of my whims again and did something stupid. Couple weeks or so ago, I wasn’t really in the mood to watch anime so I opened up Netflix and watched a Cdrama that I wanted to watch for a while now.

That Cdrama was ‘The Untamed’ which, prior to me watching it and doing said whim, I thought was just your typical historic Cdrama. Oh boy I was wrong. As I was watching it, I was thinking to myself, “This show’s really selling itself off as BL.” Which, I found out after finishing it was because it is BL. Hah...and that was just the start of it.

As I was doing my ‘Post-show research,’ I found out that it was based of a novel, called ‘Mo Dao Zu Shi’or as translated by the people on the internet as ‘Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation.’ Said novel had 2 more adaptations along with ‘The Untamed’ which were a manhua and a donghua. So me being me, I decided to watch the donghua adaptation and read both the og novel and manhua.

So how I went through this was...

The Untamed (2019)

The Donghua aka Anime I guess

The Manhua which I read while having class (such a responsible student aren’t I)

The original novel

All hail this person who has too much free time on her hands.

Anyways, as it says on the tin, I’ll be comparing the 4 adaptations/versions of the story and see what changes between them as well as the pros and cons. (Wow I sound so professional)

Some background of myself just to avoid confusion

I am not a mega hardcore Fujoshi. I don’t really enjoy reading smut, nor am I old enough to do so bear that in mind

I have 7 years worth of Chinese lessons under my belt which means I barely understand a thing and that I can get some of the jokes like how Wei Ying’s sword is called ‘Sui Bien’ and it’s funnier to hear in Chinese. In other words, compared to like actual Chinese people who live in China, I pretty much have the knowledge of a 10 year old.

The versions of the Manhua and Novel that I read were translated in English so somethings might have been lost in translation.

I have a bit of a goldfish brain so forgive me if I wrote something wrong or forgot the name of a certain character, most likely I will look it up to correct it but if I don’t...well sorry.

I am writing my opinions on each version as I finish them, so if they don’t link up to the original that’s the reasoning behind it.

All of these are my opinions and thoughts on the story. You are not entitled to follow them if you disagree. I personally believe that everyone has a voice of their own and they should use it. (Even though I don’t half of the time.)

Slight Spoiler Warning

I will be breaking down some of the scenes and characters for my comparisons so please keep that in mind.

The Untamed (2019)

As this was my first exposure to the story, I didn’t know what to expect. I loved everything about it except for the fact that literally half of the show was spent in the past, building context for what was happening in the present.

The characters were lovable and all had distict personalities, especially Wei Ying and Lan Zhan which I guess makes sense since they’re the main characters (their actors are also cute and have good chemistry.) Speaking of characters, Yanli has a more forward role in the story here compared to the other versions. The way certain characters were introduced was different too. Since it’s live action, it’s also harder to show things like extreme blushing and such so it makes Lan Zhan look very stoic and way more unexpressive here than in the other versions.

The soundtrack is nice to listen to, especially with the 2 mains singing the theme song together it’s so cute and gives it another meaning in itself. Although, I do wonder how that poor bamboo flute Wei Ying made in like 2 mins plays decent sounding music. Chen Qing(is this the name of it?), the flute he uses after his trip to the Burial Grounds has the same sound quality as that bamboo flute which is just, “how???”

They took out most of the extreme BL!!! I feel like that is the biggest difference between this version and all the rest. I know they did that to appeal to more people but it does remove some of the context to things. That doesn’t mean the moments that were kept in weren’t cute though. It did make the pair look more plantonic than romantic.

As for the story itself, as a story on its own, it’s nice, as an adaptation that’s where the line gets blurry but it leans more towards the good side. They did indeed change some things, made them work better with the medium than if they didn’t.

An example I can place is the mask. Where the other versions used white make up with oddly placed red circles around the eyes, this one used a mask instead. I agree with the choice they made, seeing as they removed the fact that Mo Xuanyu was homosexual and so the make up wouldn’t make sense. It also looks nicer than what I imagined what could’ve happened with they kept with the make up. They do make a reference to this in the show when Jin Ling and Wei Ying have a conversation in Carp Tower. “You’ve seen my face right?” “How do I know? Your face is always caked in make up or covered by that mask.”

Another issue I had which I’ll touch on later was the first episode—I had no idea what was going on for those 40 minutes of screentime.

Donghua

As of writing this post, season 3 of this has yet to come out.

My first reaction to this was “Man, the animation’s pretty, and they made Wei Ying look scarier.” Watching stuff at 12 in the morning isn’t the best thing but that’s what I do.

Anywho, this version made Wei Ying really attracted to going down the path of ‘evil’ compared to the other versions. I don’t really understand why they made this change...but they did so we have to deal with that. And his eyes glow red!! It makes him look scary and cool at the same time. I love it!!

The transitions between certain events were a bit weird to say the least. For example, at the end of episode 2/3 Wei Ying gets forcibly dragged into the Cloud Recesses and the episode ends there. By the next episode, we’re 16/23/13 however many years in the past. This makes it really confusing for someone who hasn’t watched or read any other version of the story. It definitely made me confused and I already finished one.

While ‘The Untamed’ told us everything in one long flashback, the donghua broke it up into small chunks placed whenever information was needed. I don’t think that was a good idea, but then I also think it was a better decision than what they did for the Cdrama. As I watched this adaptation, I found myself confused from time to time because what happened in the prior episode didn’t always match what happened in the current episode like I mentioned earlier.

As for the artstyle, personally, I think some of the characters look similar minus the hair. However, I do like the little ways they made Lan Zhan express his feelings towards Wei Ying.

Speaking of which, when I first saw them together in this version in the forest near the Goddess Temple, I had to do a bit of a double take because of the height difference which wasn’t so evident in ‘The Untamed’. I soon found out that Lan Zhan was taller than Wei Ying before and after he gets reincarnated(?) Prior, it was just a small gap of 2cm which later turned to 6cm after possessing Mo Xuanyu.

I didn’t notice their height gaps while watching ‘The Untamed’ because Wei Ying’s actor, Xiao Zhan, is taller than Lan Zhan’s actor, Wang Yi Bo by about 2 inches which is like 5 cm? and so they had to do some weird thing with platforms to make Xiao Zhan look shorter in comparison.

Soundtrack wise, I personally think that ‘The Untamed’ was better in that sense. Where it had an amazing souding flute, this one had minor earrape in a nutshell.

This version made itself, in my eyes look more like a historical fighting anime as opposed to the BL vibes I was getting from ‘The Untamed’ and the other versions. They added a lot of action scenes and made the mystery more interesting for me. Along with this, the overall look and feel of this made it seem like it came from a completely different source material.

Manhua

Small FYI, as of writing this post the Manhua is at 147 Chapters.

(I should’ve kept up the trend and got a screenshot from that scene in the Manhua but I didn’t so here we are with gay rabbits.)

As your local internet friend who reads more manga than normal books nowadays, I enjoyed reading the manhua and finished it in a couple days.

Compared to the first 2 versions here, these last 2 are both things that you have to read to get through, albeit one has pictures and one doesn’t.

While normally, one would read silently, I like listening to music while I do. And seeing as the OST of ‘The Untamed’ sounds really nice, I listened to it while reading both the manhua and novel when I could.

This one brought out the BL elements that were missing from the first 2. They gave Wei Ying and Lan Zhan a lot of kissing or just straight up affectionate scenes which I think ties in with the general theming of the original novel more.

As this one is probably the closest of the adaptations to the original, it’s the least confusing to read, although that might’ve been influenced by my experiencing the story for the third time at this point. I say that, however, there were many story elements that weren’t present in either one prior to this.

Examples this can be seen with their collecting of body parts that belonged to the former Nie Sect Leader. In ‘The Untamed’ they find the sword spirit which guides them through the rest of the story. In the Donghua adaptation, they get the arm, but also get the head of the the Jin with the hundred holes curse which was an original addition. Here, they get the arm from Mo Manor, find the other one then find the torso and so on before finding the head in Jin GuangYao’s possession.

The flashbacks in this version were also executed really well, in my opinion, as it doesn’t feel super confusing while reading it and it gives just enough information to help the events unfold. It also gives us a chance to see how much of an ass(sorry) Wei Ying was when he was the Yiling Patriach from his own perspective as well as give us a moment of WangXian in the middle of all that chaos.

Novel

Here’s a picture of gay rabbits for everyone.

At this point, I was switching between the novel and the Manhua to read whichever one I wanted at any given time which might have blurred my sense of what belonged in each one so I’ll try my best to make sure.

Since this one is the original source material, it was clear from the get go that this will be the one with the least confusing version of events and the most amount of detail.

I was surprised on how close the manhua and ‘The Untamed’ was to the novel. Although, the former condensed the mystery to fit within the timeframe while the latter hasn’t finished just yet.

Personally, I like this author, and will probably read more of her works further down the line. Even though the version I read was in english, I still could feel the meaning behind certain aspects which I think shows her skill as an author.

The novel clearly shows the mischief that goes through Wei Ying’s head and their gradual (I say gradual but I think Lan Zhan just snapped) change of attitudes towards each other.

Arc One- Mo Manor

Past here I’ll break down the first arc of each one because I think all of them did it in relatively different ways. Be warned for spoilers if you haven’t watched or read all of them.

The Untamed (2019)

Out of all of these versions, this one definitely had me scratching my head in confusion the most even after watching it a second time once I finished the entire show.

As the only version that had the curse issued at the start as a moving factor of the story as well as the Yin Iron which was specifically made for this version, it didn’t explain enough at the start.

There were many things I could say were wrong about this beginning, from starting at a flashback to not properly introducing us to our characters but the biggest problem in my mind was the lack of explanation at the present.

Like I mentioned, starting at a flashback is a terrible idea as it gives the viewer high expectations only for it to be crushed the second it ends. Here, it shows a small portion of the battle at the Nightless City without much context then it quickly changes to 16 years later with a seemingly random group of people.

Another issue is the amount of useless characters who were introduced. In the other versions, there were only 2 Lan disciples who were given names and were introduced properly while here there were more than I want to count. Add to that the one telling stories about the YiLing Patriarch and the weird guy walking around with a flag, and you got yourself total confusion.

Donghua

This one was slightly less confusing to watch. As it starts with a clip of Wei Ying commanding corpses which matches the overall feel of the donghua. The rumors that he died stretched over the time skip and we meet this version of Mo Xuanyu who is caked with make up, whether or not he was a cut-sleeve (gay) in this version, I forgot.

It fully explains the curse and instead of having a couple of Lan disciples just standing there watching, we get to focus on the 2 important ones, Lan Sizhui and Lan JiYing. It gives us a slightly deeper insight into Wei Ying’s mind, as he states ‘you got the wrong one,’ just after being reincarnated, indicating that he isn’t as vicious as painted by the first few minutes of the show. Like the other versions, they also show how he considers the cons of using his demonic abilities and that Sizhui would probably tell on him to Lan Zhan, meaning that Sizhui was a keen, observant young man.

Manhua and the Novel

As for the introductions, these two were very similar. Both have the rumors of the Yiling Patriarch across the screen as we get further down the story and meet our main character.

It gets the details from the Donghua adaptation and mixes it with more information to create a more detailed account of what was happening, also making this Wei Ying seem smarter compared to his counterparts in other versions. He also hesitates more on showing his abilities, knowing that he’s going to be caught if he does.

Final Thoughts

As of writing this, I’m only halfway through the novel but it covers the portion until where the manhua is currently at. I would finish reading it before posting this but it would take too long and probably make this post even longer than it currently is, which isn’t such a good idea. If I had much more patience and effort I would really like to break down each arc and their differences from one another but I can’t be bothered right now. (Sorry)

I can safely say that in terms of adaptations, ‘The Untamed’ is relatively close to the novel, albeit a very condensed version. As flashback filled as it is, it wasn’t very confusing to watch past the first two episodes.

The Donghua adaptation takes several liberties, going more of an action oriented route instead of the calmer more, I wouldn’t say love but character oriented novel.

The manhua is definitely the closest to the novel, so if you really don’t want to read a lot of words, and I mean a lot of words, then go ahead and read it.

What else do I have to say...if you’re new to the story, welcome, if you’re a veteran who’s been here longer than me, sorry for taking up space on your feed. And congrats for making it to the end.

[bennguinfest]

Spring 2019 Fan Fest Prompt List

Hey fan-festers! 

We’re happy to say that we received 81 prompts this time around, and we spent the last few days distilling all those amazing and creative prompts down to a list of 63 prompts! (If you’re keeping count, that’s far more than last year’s 48!) 

As with last year, we had some repeat prompts and prompts that were similar enough that it made sense to condense them under one item. Additionally, most of the prompts we distilled down to a few words for the sake of having a concise list! Again, like last year’s fest, we’re providing the full text of the original prompts under the cut, in case you’re looking for more details to get started!

You’re free to create any kind of fanwork based on the below prompts! There’s no minimum word count and no rules on what to create, or even how many - if you want to combine prompts, that’s cool! If you’re called to make more than one thing, that’s awesome too! The only limit is that this fest runs from now until April 15th - so if you’re creating something, make sure you post it and tag it with #bennguinfanfest so we can share it to this tumblr! If you’re posting to AO3, the collection is now open for submissions as well, so make sure to include your work there so everyone can find it!

One final thing: even if you didn’t submit prompts, feel free to participate and join us on the discord! We’ve set up a discord server here: bennguinfest on discord to stay connected, inspire each other, and have fun! It’s a great group and really active, so don’t be shy!

That’s it! On to the prompt list!

Matchmaking dogs

Space AU

Birthday gifts

Coming out/being together in the NHL

Acting like a couple (but they’re not actually a couple)

Tyler as a WAG

Transported to a parallel universe

Abducted by aliens

Superhero/Superpowers AU

Amnesia from an injury

Soulmate AUs: Color-based, name-on-wrist

Thirst follow/Met online

Drag AU

Time loops

Alternate histories

Cop AU

Reality show AU (Survivor, the Bachelor, Married At First Sight)

Jamie Poppins/Single dad AU

Supernatural races (vampires, werewolves, shapeshifters, etc.)

Omegaverse: Courting

Delivery boy/Uber driver AU

Tyler gets traded back to Boston

Breaking up & making up

Omegaverse: Bonding drama

Boring office desk job

Road trips

Protective Jamie defending Tyler

College/University AU

Tyler tries to be Jamie’s wingman

Lites’s comments affecting the boys

Taking care of a sick hockey player

Cuddle pile/team bed fic

Harry Potter AU

Fire alarm meet-cute

DnD/Hockey Mashup

De-aged after a fight

Bakery/Tattoo Artist AU

Friends with benefits - and then with feelings

Zombie AU

Homeless AU

Nerds are hot/competency kink

Omegaverse: scents

YouTube channel AU

Bridal shop meet-cute

Beard appreciation

Tornado warning

Figure skater mpreg

Self-conscious Jamie

Wing!fic

Winning the cup and a kiss on the ice

Lifeguard AU

Haunted farm

Animal daemons

Surprise/sudden parenting

Jealousy from dating/flirting with someone else

Secret relationship and almost getting caught

Long-lost childhood friends

"Come here."

“Close the door.”

“I feel like I can’t breathe.”

“It’s three in the morning and you want me to do what?”

“You could’ve died.”

“I thought you were dead.

Full text of the prompts under the link! If you have any questions, feel free to send us an ask - and as always, happy creating! 

1. Matchmaking dogs: Tyler’s dogs want to get their human with a certain cow-eyed captain

“well this is really awkward considering the last time we saw each other, i was screaming at you to never talk to me again, but like, my dog recognized you all the way across the park and literally dragged me over here because she misses you so hi” AU

2. Space AU (ex. Star Trek, Firefly, or something else entirely)

3. It's Tyler's birthday and at first Jamie gives off the feeling that he's forgotten and this hurts Tyler but it turns out that that Jamie wakes Tyler up at midnight on his birthday with two tickets to an offseason trip

4. I want a fic that REALLY captures what it would be like if two NHL players were to come out in 2019. I'm talking teammate reactions, press reactions, social media, family, the whole shebang. I wanna see the real raw reactions and the struggle the guys would have to go through. I would also loooove if you could fit Jamie proposing to Tyler in there somewhere but it isn't a necessity.

Jamie has a hard time dealing with how public Tyler’s life is, with the insta stories and with random people filming him all the time. It feels like it’s only a matter of time before their relationship is exposed because of how much Tyler is in the public eye. Jamie doesn’t want to break up but it seems like that’s the only choice he has. He doesn’t want to do this so much that he calls a press conference and comes out of the closet.

Jamie and Tyler have been dating since 2014 and he’s tired of hiding it. So with Jamie’s consent he posts a cute photo of them being a couple and writes a heartfelt monologue about their story. And the whole hockey community blows up about it. And it’s kinda about how they deal with being and out couple and Tyler posting obnoxiously cute couple photos on his Instagram. Sorry this prompted is a mess I just want Tyler to be a troll and post cute cliche couple photos on Instagram of him and Jamie and the world loading their minds about it.

Jamie and Tyler come out to the team about them dating. Management wants to keep their relationship secret so they make Jamie fake date someone. And him and Tyler struggle with the stress that puts on them.

realistic consequences of being together with the team

5. Tyler and Jamie are super close but super oblivious to the fact that they act like a literal couple. Jamie has a gf and she hates the fact that it seems like Jamie cares more about Tyler than he does her.

6. Fluffy fic where Jamie still plays hockey, he meets tyler and they fall in love and tyler becomes an nhl wife/husband/boyfriend.

7. Parallel universes -- somehow Tyler (or Jamie) finds himself in an alternate universe where his life is radically different (for better or for worse) which makes him realize how much his relationship to Jamie (or Tyler) means.

waking up in the future/alternate reality fic

8. Jamie and Tyler are abducted by aliens and taken to a faraway planet where they are prisoners in a bizarro planet. Is it real or is it a nightmare though?

9. jamie and tyler are in danger and major trouble when their identities as superheroes are revealed and bad guys are after them.

powers/mutant AU (as in pick one, not all at the same time) One hides their ability from the other, and when the other finds out, its...not good

Superhero AU! Are they superhero partners? Is one of them a superhero and can't date the other because he has to keep him safe? Are they both trying to keep their secret identities secret from each other while simultaneously dating in both iterations? Up to you, or anything else!

10. Amnesia angst for the win - Jamie gets a particularly hard hit, wakes up and can remember everyone except for tyler (maybe not explicitly, say they can *remember* them, but not remember that they've been dating for eight months now) cue tyler avoiding jamie because its too hard him to be around him

11. soulmate au! people are born with blackmarks - on their hands, their faces, their skin in general - the black marks is the first place their soulmate would touch them. Jamie was born without a mark. Tyler was born with two pitch black palms. Years after tylers been traded to the stars, Jamie falls asleep, and tyler can't help but run his fingers through Jamie's hair, just once, and then he looks down at his hand and the tips of his fingers are colored, and so are the few strands of Jamie's black hair.

Soulmate au- either abo or name on wrist. No drama, just fluff!

12. Tyler thirst follows Jamie on insta. This can be hockey or non-hockey, but Jamie follows back and they start talking.

13. Rupaul’s Drag Race au. Tyler and Jamie are competing against each other but are constantly talking about how much they like each other/are attracted to each other in the confessional. They’re both single, so why not go for it? Alternatively, one is a queen and the other is a member of the pit crew.

14. groundhog day au (aka, tylers/jamies day keeps getting reset, again and again until they get together finally and wake up the next day)

15. alternate history, tyler is never traded to dallas, but they still somehow meet and fall in love anyway

16. cop AU, where in tyler the rookie transfers and get stuck with Jamie the sorta senior to show him the ropes. Jamie gets attached. And that’s...a problem, in their line of work. Or at least it is for him.

17. Survivor au- same or different tribe, as long as they’re the “showmance”

"The Bachelor" AU

Married at first sight au- either within the parameters of the actual show, or they literally get married the day they meet

18. Jamie!Poppins - tyler is a single father with a new baby and no clue of what he's going to do. enter Jamie Poppins!

19. Minotaur Jamie

The Dallas Stars are a pack of werewolves, and Tyler is the vampire that’s been traded to their team.

Shifter verse!! and ive got nothing else for this other than wanting to see tyler as a tiny lab puppy pls and thanks

20. Alpha Tyler and omega Jamie: “usually when I meet an omega I wanna bone, but with Jamie I wanna fucking hold his hand and feed him bonbons all day, what the fuck”

21. Jamie the delivery boy. Kay hear me out. Like he keeps delivering huge quantities of food to this particular house and it always seems like there should be more than one person. But there’s not. And Tyler orders. All. The. Time. Hopeful it’s jamie. But they’re both too dumb to ask each other out. Lots of pining

Uber driver! Jamie picks up Tyler from a one night stand

22. Tyler gets traded back to Boston AU - Everything hurts and nothing is okay. (except that at least one of them is retiring at the end of the season so it's actually more okay than they think) (also a future fic)

23. breakup and makeup but spanning over seasons - no cheese plots

24. Bond drama (abo) either they bond too quickly, like at the all star game or something and dont know ehat to do because theyre on different teams, or they really want to bond and its not happening as fast as they think it should

25. Boring office desk job

26. road trip to Montreal to visit Jordie

27. while out chilling at a bar celebrating a win, jamie and tyler are having a couple of drinks and when jamie gets up to go the bathroom, a drunk stranger and a couple of his friends decide to harass Tyler, upsetting him. A furiously protective Jamie intervenes and despite holding his own, Jamie is beaten up and him and tyler end up in a dumpster.

28. A University fic where Tyler is out and proud and gay and Jamie is still trying to figure out his sexuality but he's having a hard time. No homophobic Jamie tho please, just a guy trying to figure himself out. Would love if he would rely on his family throughout the fic for advice.

I’m always a sucker for college au, or masters/PhD students etc

COLLEGE AU BECAUSE WE ALL NEED MORE OF THAT IN OUR LIVES

'the cops showed up to a party we were at and chased everyone away. You and I happened to run in the opposite direction of all our friends and got lost in some dark and creepy street.’ - College AU

29. Tyler finds out Jamie is gay (outed/comes out/whatever you prefer) and embarks on a wild but good-intentioned quest to find Jamie his perfect man.

30. Tyler is hurt by Lites' comments more than one thinks and Jamie is worried when he sees Tyler crying in private.

31. sickfic? jamie taking care of tyler is- like just how pathetic is a sick hockey player?

32. team bed au omg someone pls

33. Harry Potter au but not as high school student, just something in the magical world

34. "3am and the fire alarm in our apartment building went off and you look cold here is my jacket"

35. Hockey AU but they’re all dnd races. I would love to see half-orc Jamie, and goliath Bishop, and tiefling Tyler. Please be as creative as you want with this!

Hockey AU where instead of going out, a core group of guys plays dnd in their hotel rooms while on the road. Tyler and Jamie’s characters are getting flirty in game, and it’s starting to translate outside of it as well.

36. Tyler and jamie fight - a *big* fight, and the next day Jamie suddenly got a deaged tyler on his hands and no idea how to fix it

37. Jamie owns a bakery and tylers the new tat artist next door plsplspls gimme that slow burn bullshit with this one

38. ty/jam used to have a whole friends w benefits thing that went oh-so-wrong because one (or both of them) caught feelings—as one does—and the fic is kind of that aftermath and trying to repair the broken relationship.

39. ZOMBIES

40. Homeless AU w/tyler

41. Tyler is smarter than he leads people to believe, and Jamie is into privately nerdy Tyler

42. Abo verse surrounding scents. Tyler smells like the most delicious thing Jamie has ever smelled, but he thinks he shouldn’t bond with a teammate

43. Youtube channel

44. Designer and single friend of client at a bridal shop AU

45. Beard appreciation

46. a tornado warning hits dallas and everybody is ordered to seek shelter. jamie follows tyler back to his house and hide in the basement with the dogs, frantic and terrified.

47. Tyler is a figure skater, Jamie still plays hockey. They meet and fall inlove but whoops tyler ends up pregnant. The world still isn't 100% accepting of LGBTQIA+ people and even less accepting of men getting pregnant. Tyler feels down at some point cause he has to put his career on hold. but it all ends up great in the end.

48. Jamie feels self-conscious about his ass after some chirping from opposing players and it's up to Tyler to comfort him

49. Wing!fic

50. They win the Stanley cup and kiss at centre ice

51. Jamie's a lifeguard. They meet after Tyler basically drowns himself. (It's not an excuse to have Jamie kiss him. Its *not*.)

52. Haunted farm au- Tyler is a witch that lives on a farm where extremely weird things happen. He ends up rescuing Jamie and Jamie pledges his services for one year in exchange for his life. During that year, they fall for each other hard, but there are outside forces in the farm trying to keep them apart.

53. Animal daemons

Goose daemons

54. Marshall, Cash and Gerry turn into human kids (temporarily or not), Bennguin handle being sudden parents

55. Tyler having a serious boyfriend for a while and Jamie is jealous because he wants to date Tyler but he’s not ready to come out. And he’s also upset because everyone is taking it so well and nothing has changed and he realizes he really missed out. But in the end they still get together.

56. secret relationship and how they almost get caught - many many times

57. Childhood pen pal / long distance childhood friends?

58. "Come here."

59. “Close the door.”

60. “I feel like I can’t breathe.”

61. “It’s three in the morning and you want me to do what?”

62. “You could’ve died.”

63. “I thought you were dead.”

[aspirationfail]

55-75 FOR FELIX AKA MY LUV 💓

55. What is something they always wanted to do but too scared?

-; Ask if he can move up in the Aizukotetsu-kai Yazuka family.

56. Do they own their own baby pictures?

-; Oddly enough, yea. He likes to keep em in his wallet so he can show people how ugly he was when he was little and that his eyes are real.

57. What makes them standout among others?

-; Probably his eyes and facial scars. (they were gone in the photo bc i’m making him a new skin lol)

58. Do they like to show off?

-; Yea, a lot. He mainly likes to show off his dog or fighting skills.

59. What is their favourite song?

-; Claude Debussy : Clair de Lune, for Piano (Suite Bergamasque No. 3) 

60. What would be their dream vehicle?

-; Cars isn’t his thing. Just anything that is good on speed and gas.

61. What is their favourite book?

-;Neuromancer by William Gibson 

62. Who, in their opinion, makes the best food?

-; Leilani!

63. Are they approachable?

-; Not really, he looks really scary upfront but you tend to feel better once he starts speaking.

64. Did they ever change their appearance?

-; If you’re speaking surgery wise, no. But, he has dyed his hair recently.

65. What makes them smile?

-; His friends, dad, and playing his guitar. 

66. Do they like glowsticks?

-; Yes, like.. a lot.

67. What is something that is simple, but always makes them smile?

-; Being able to wake up every morning.

68. Are they a day or night person?

-; Night, that’s when stuff gets exciting. 

69. Are they allergic to anything?

-; Shrimp!

70. What do you, the creator of this OC, like most about them?

-; How outgoing he is, I’m so shy and awkward. I envy how he can just approach people and make friends easily.

71. Who is their ride or die?

-; Jiro and Jett

72. Do they currently have a significant other? If not, are they going to get one later one?

-; Welll, originally Felix was made for a ship w/ my friend male oc but it died ig?? So, he’s free atm. I don’t know if he’s gonna get one later,,, but shipping is open for him btw!! 

73. What attracts them to another person?

-; How well they can take how random and weird he is, also what he associated himself with. He likes it when guys are understanding of what he does.

74. Who is one person that can always make them laugh?

-; Jett!! They’re always making each other laugh until their crying or on the floor.

75. Have they ever partied too hard and their friends had to take them home?

-; Nah, he knows how to control himself.

[a-non-sequitur]

Rogue One Headcanon/Fanmeta: RebelCaptain & Jealousy

- link to my other Rogue One blabberings -

nb: still haven’t read/seen anything related to Rogue One except for the actual film. i also haven’t seen the Original Trilogy in years. headcanons are subject to change.

I’ve read around some people’s headcanons/stories/excited blabbering about (if they had survived) Jyn and Cassian having to deal with jealousy of other people - eg Cassian regarding Jyn+Han or Lando, Jyn regarding Cassian+Leia.

And I am getting on this train because this trope is MY JAM.

Firstly, we can all agree (and if not: you ain’t changing my heart and soul) that Jyn and Cassian have basically tunnel-visioned their entire sexuality into each other post-Scarif (aka Jynsexual, Cassiansexual) (new dating website: find your soulmate through mutual goals, trauma, rescues, orbiting bodies, and heart-eyes!) and that if they notice other people, it’s purely from an aesthetic point of view. AND that they are in an entirely, absolutely, unhealthily-from-95%-of-people’s-perspectives codependent relationship where they feel their skin begin to crawl the moment they haven’t heard from each other in three hours.

And yet! And yet! Despite their whole-hearted, titanium-strength trust in each other, alas their little hearts can be such soft things that expect pain.  Between Cassian still fighting with the idea of having something after having given up everything he had for decades and Jyn re-developing her sense of self-esteem (she was abandoned multiple times by incredibly important people in her life; as if she feels good about herself), well... feelings of romantic inadequacy is in the air, my friends.

Prepare yourself for a long-ass blabber-post

From Jyn’s perspective, she of course feels immediately inadequate after meeting Princess Leia:

This (girl? woman? woman.) woman is a fucking beautiful specimen of a human being, and if Jyn wasn’t newly Cassian-sexual, she probably would have tried to get those ear-buns tumbling down those shoulders and that back, if-y’know-what-i-mean. (Or at least flirted really awkwardly. You never really know with Jyn.)

This woman, despite being three years younger than Jyn, is respected and taken seriously by basically the entire Alliance (I’m sure there are some assholes, and I’m sure those assholes are quickly dealt with). Jyn may have the charisma and a fiery passion to lead an army, but from her perspective? Leia has the majesty and finesse and vision to lead a galaxy.

Cassian and Leia are absolutely on good terms. It might be because Cassian respects her so much. It might be because Cassian has met Leia multiple times throughout the years due to her father’s (and her own) involvement in the Alliance. It might be because they have a shared culture due to Alderaan and its diaspora throughout the galaxy (you can pry Space Latinx culture from my cold, dying, rigor mortis hands); they often speak to each other in Alderaa (aka Spanish) - Leia in her high-society Alderaa, and Cassian in his informal Festian dialect. 

Jyn sometimes hears them speaking to each other in a different language. Alderaa, she’s pretty sure. She’s only just begun to learn it, and mainly through the few words she catches from when Cassian speaks it around her - amada, estrella, estrellita, mi vida, “Cállate, Kay!”

(Cassian is a goddamn newly-realized romantic and you know it.)

One day, she goes to the mess hall to meet her family of rogues for dinner, and she sees that Leia is already sitting across a table from Cassian. From afar, she can see the relaxation in Cassian’s face. He is not grinning, per se, but there’s a small smile on his lips, and if she were closer, she knows that she’d see the outer corners of his eyes crease.

They’re talking, and as she treks towards them with her tray (piled with food from corner to corner to corner to corner), she hears the rolls characteristic of Alderaa, though it sounds differently now. She thinks they might be trying to imitate each other’s accents or their dialects or both. From what she can tell, Cassian’s Alderaanian Alderaa is flawless; considering his past as a spy, she would be more shocked (and absolutely mocking) if it wasn’t.

Leia’s Festian, however, is apparently atrocious, because Jyn sees Cassian huff a breath of laughter and - yes, the creases are there. Jyn swallows and struggles to keep her face from going protectively blank.

(Cassian sees her approaching from behind Leia, and his smile widens and his eyes soften. Despite the fact that there is a nearly entirely empty bench on one side of him, he scooches over so that Jyn can have the coveted quick-escape corner seat. And, again, despite the amount of available space, they’re pressed from shoulder to hip. Leia muses and hopes that maybe, one day, she’ll have someone look at her the way Captain Andor looks at Jyn Erso.)

And the worst part? Despite showing her usual taciturn, reserved self to the princess, Jyn feels an immense amount of respect and awe for this woman who was able to defy the wrath of Darth Vader himself, who saved the plans that sacrificed so many, who galvanized the troops and Council when hope wavered, whose strength and belief in the cause shines steady and bright and overwhelming like a sun despite the immense losses that she has suffered (that her family has caused her to suffer). 

(Who is someone Jyn can only hope she’ll be like one day.) 

(Jyn does not realize Leia wishes the same about her.) 

(Neither realize that they both already are. Supernovas: light, power, destruction, rebirth.) 

The part of Jyn that is still healing and rebuilding from years of self-loathing -- that is the part that recognizes that her scars are not scars yet, but rather scabs that easily rip off with the underbelly readily exposed to the elements.

Because Jyn knows - Jyn knows that if Cassian had mentioned any desire to - if Cassian had changed his mind about - if Cassian was happy around --

If Jyn had seen these things happenings, she knows she would have barely put up a token resistance. She wouldn’t leave the Resistance; she wouldn’t even leave Cassian.

But still, in her own way, she would leave. Because that’s how she protects herself from bleeding.

(That part of Jyn that is still relearning - one day that part will have learned, and she will fight tooth and nail and heart and soul before she decides to leave. It’s just not today.)

Really, it’s inevitable that Jyn and Leia become the best of friends.

From Cassian’s perspective, it seems natural that he would feel threatened by Han Solo. Swagger, arrogance, handsome looks, daredevil attitude, and dorkiness? The same men and women who roll their eyes around the man are the same ones who follow his every move as he walks across the hangar. And it’s not like Solo doesn’t not flirt with Jyn. But --

Han Solo flirts with basically every person he has even a little bit of interest in. And even ones he doesn’t (hey, gotta get a discount somehow, right?).

And Cassian, who reads microexpressions better than his own heart, can tell pretty quickly that when he does flirt with Jyn, it’s 10% this-is-an-attractive-person!, 20% naturally/aggressively created flirtatious persona upkeep, and 70% trying-to-get-the-Princess-jealous.

Kay gives him a percentage of the likelihood of Jyn actually sleeping with Solo (insp.). Cassian reminds himself that Kay is his best friend, and best friends don’t re-reprogram each other.

And Jyn - well, Jyn just seems so amused by the whole thing. She shoots back at Solo’s banter, and she rolls her eyes at him, but her gaze doesn’t follow the man across the hangar. 

Cassian made sure to watch several times. In a moment of admittedly poor judgement, he even had Kay, with his more accurate photoreceptors and vector calculations, to check surreptitiously.

Kay did not check surreptitiously.

So, no, Cassian doesn’t really feel threatened by him.

That’s not to say that the first time he sees Jyn and Solo standing close together, with Solo leaning closer than is planetary acceptable in most human cultures, Cassian does not react. 

Cassian is a hypocrite. Exhibit A:

He passes on Baze’s request to meet with Jyn, and as Jyn leaves, Cassian turns to follow, but not before giving Solo the most unimpressed, stone-cold look he can possibly muster, ending with a professional nod and “Solo.”

Han later admits to Chewie that he felt a chill crawl down his entire spine at that moment. Usually, he’d up the ante and aggressively increase his advances, if only as a dick-measuring contest, but Andor looks like the type of man who would poison you while eating dinner with you.

(Cassian has, in fact, poisoned someone while eating dinner with them.)

But do you want to know who Cassian actually feels threatened by?

Luke kriffin’ Skywalker.

 Within their first conversation - before their first conversation - Cassian knows the following: this (boy? man? boy.) boy is the light to his darkness. And it’s not about looks - though, he thinks wryly, Skywalker is certainly fair to his darker coloring. Rather, the boy’s goodness personified, the hero the Rebellion can show the galaxy without needing to hide the skeletons. And Cassian - well.  

The boy is a free spirit. He speaks freely, he smiles freely, he laughs freely, people feel free just being around him. People are drawn to him, this legend in the making, the one who is carving hope into the lifestreams of the galaxy’s oppressed hearts. And Cassian - well.

Skywalker has lost all he’s known - his home, his family, his mentor, his friends, his way of life - but he has not turned bitter, has not turned inwards. Even at his most selfish, he gives and gives. And Cassian - well. 

And Jyn - is it surprising that he finds her spending time with the boy? (and do you notice, Cassian, how you cling to that term?) She can be as clear-sighted as Cassian when she’s patient enough; she can see all the ways Skywalker fills the painful cracks of others with kindness, with compassion, with joy. He finished her mission of destroying the Death Star, made it so that her father’s sacrifice (that her mother’s, her own) was not made in vain. She looks so young when she’s around him, as if the years of abandonment and self-reliance were washed away.

He sees them once in the hangar by the X-Wings. Jyn sits on a crate, and Luke stands in front of her. She has pulled her necklace from beneath her shirt, and they lean close to each other so that Luke can examine the kyber. Their heads are nearly touching. They’re talking to each other, and as he approaches, he finds that the topic is about their families (My mother believed in the Force. My father was a Jedi). 

Cassian hasn’t talked very much that day, but his throat feels raw.

Jyn sees him approaching, and she smiles with a rare instance of teeth. She tucks the necklace back into her shirt (and Cassian, Cassian who has tracked people’s expressions for more than a decade, sees the way the boy follows the movement to her neckline. He certainly sees the blush that rises (he is, after all, fairer of skin than he).) 

(Luke watches as Jyn Erso - Jyn Erso, who had gone against the Rebellion and lead a suicide mission to retrieve the plans that would help stymie the Empire; Jyn Erso, who had - based on rumors - transformed from a hardened criminal to a hero; Jyn Erso, who single-handedly wiped the floor of five (five!) Pathfinders and himself earlier that day during training - Luke watches as Jyn Erso takes Captain Andor’s offered hand to assist her off a crate that’s not that tall. He sees how her fingers linger on the man’s even as she excuses herself and bids him farewell, even as they both turn, the Captain giving him a respectful nod. Luke finds his own shoulders dropping with a sigh; he knew he should have put more stock into Han’s and Wedge’s warnings.)

Luke is a sun, and all suns are stars.  Jyn - Jyn, Cassian’s amada, his estrellita - the boy is from a binary star system, isn’t he?

When I said Cassian was a romantic, I meant he was one of those angsty, poetic types.

(If Jyn were to turn a phrase - well, no, she really, really isn’t the type. Instead, Chirrut would say to Cassian: A star is at its brightest when there is darkness surrounding it.)

(Kaytu replies, “Actually --”)

(Bodhi inactivates his speakers.)

The worst part, Cassian realizes, is just how much he actually likes the boy.

Jyn and Leia, Cassian and Luke: two sides of two identical coins. Except one combination involves incest.

- link to my other Rogue One blabberings -