#<- so i can replace them all at once when im on my laptop

[sleepy-stitches]

scary spell of spookiness

you know this is reminding me that i was considering making all my original tags wizard themed. how are we feeling about the ask tag "letters to the wizard" because personally im k- it just started raining????? its thirty fucking degrees and it just started raining???? anyway i think i like that as a tag i just need to come up with a matching one for my original posts

[clockmax]

CRAZY, SEXY, HOT !

JJK MEN AND THEIR PUSSY EATING HABITS

! FT toji, sukuna, geto, gojo, choso

WARNINGS: this is all just freaky. dumbification, dry humping, fingering, overstimulation, yea you get the point here.

A/N: LMAOO freakbob milk server saw during gojos part he just started playing on his laptop mid-eating you out. anyways. im gonna make a pt2 for this. MDNI. 18+ pls leave requests or just spam my inbox i wanna talk to you guys!!

Toji

He’s the nasty type with it. Like a freaky type. Toji’s the kind to eat you out from the back, making sure your pretty lil’ ass is up in the air when he's got your face pressed down, tongue licking up long stripes against your folds, collecting your juices before spreading them all over your pussy.

He’ll bury himself between your thighs from behind, hands firmly planted on your ass to spread it open, getting the most out of your cunt. He makes sure it’s nice n out there, teasing you before he’s eating you out in no time. ANd when he eats, he eats.

FInger rubbing on your swollen, throbbing clit as he tongue fucks you, letting out groans from just how good your juices taste coating his tongue and lips like that.

He knows he’s overstimulating you, rubbing your clit through each orgasm that rips through you, but he just keeps going. 

“ C’mon, pretty girl, just one more f’r me. Doin so good for me, let me j’st finish my meal, baby.” Which promptly turns into him eating you out for nearly another hour. Tongue flat as he drags it up and down, paying extra attention to your clit; sucking it as his fingers replace where his tongue once was inside of you, tongue flicking the bed up and down, just until he’s got you moaning into another orgasm.

Toji who loves how your thighs start shaking with each orgasm, each teasing movement, each assault done on your poor pussy. He’s practically  dazed with how delicious your cunt is to him, talk about a free meal for him.

Sukuna

Lowkey mean with it. I mean it’s not that he’s too harsh, but he will literally overstimulate you to no end.

He’s not focused on  how much you’re cumming, but rather satisfying himself by enjoying how sweet you taste. It’s like watching a starved man, he wont lwt up until he decides he’s satisfied, which could be hours of him between your thighs.

Sometimes he has you on the brink of passing out, sometimes he’ll edge you until you’re nearly crying to cum. 

He gets real handsy when eating you out too. Traveling up your thighs, holding your ass, fondling your breasts, he’s really just teasing you more and more, trying to get you to that breaking point where you start begging.

Maybe hes just a freak, sure. But he eats pussy for his own pleasure. It’s something to keep him busy so he’s not sitting around doing nothing.

If eating you out until you can only think about his tongue against your clit is a past time, he’s more than willing to partake in it. 

Maybe he just wants to see you wiggle around in ecstasy and bliss as he keeps abusing that one spot that has you nearly squirting all over.

Or maybe he’s just mean! :3

Geto

Geto’s a very attentive lover. He doesn't skip a beat when it comes to you. It’s no difference with sex, he might just be even more attentive, putting your pleasure before his.

Especially with eating you out.

He’ll take his time, not too fast or too slow, getting you nice and worked up before he gets himself to the good part.

He’ll make sure you’re wiggling around as he kisses your thighs and rubs your sides, hands going down to cup your ass before pulling you to his face. 

He’s all up on your pussy in no time. He’ll have his tongue buried in you, eyes watching at every single reaction, hands holding your hips to keep him still and let him take his time. 

Or when he moves his tongue out to flatten it against your pussy, moving up and down in long stripes. 

Sometimes he’ll eat you out with his tongue piercing, pressing the metal against your clit. Letting it sit there, the smooth, cold metal reacting with hot, swollen clit. 

He’ll kiss your thighs, praising how beautiful you look as his fingers pump in and out of you, curling up at the right moment to prod against your g-spot, egging you on closer to the edge. 

He’s just so attentive to every reaction and what gets you worked up, using all those little mental notes for each time. He’ll have you moaning his name like a melody in almost no time.

Gojo

Gojo seems like the type of guy to eat you out in the way he knows best, edging you until you're withering and begging to cum.

He loves you, he really does, but he loves the face you make when his tongue is all up on your cunt, watching your eyelashes flutter, pretty nails grabbing at his hair to pull him closer.

Oh but the moment he thinks your about to cum? He pulls away, giving kisses and hickeys to your thighs. He teases the crap out of you for it too.

“So sexy when you’re all pent up like that.” He’ll teased, before diving back to lapping up your juices, tongue parting your folds. He’ll keep his hands pussy, one circling your clit, the other kneading the fat of your ass. 

He loves it especially when he presses his nose against your clit, watching you desperately rub against it for even the slightest friction. Just eating you out and listening to your pleas and moans could get him to pretty much burst in his own pants. His arms hook around your thighs, pressing you closer to him, eyes fluttering with the contact, how much deeper he can get his tongue, prodding it against that spongy spot to make sure you see stars.

And when he does let you cum, he’s fingering you right through it, huffing out air before inhaling, lips shiny with your juices. He really just can’t help himself when it comes to your pussy, it’s like candy for him. 

Choso

Choso does it desperately. I refuse to fight anyone on this. He may be inexperienced, but his enthusiasm makes up for it. Hes almost frantically lapping up at you. Hands feeling all up your thighs and body, eyes shut. 

Choso who moans and whines into your cunt, just so desperate for more of its taste, slightly humping into the sheet for friction. Anytime you’d pull away, he’d look at you. Soaked chin, shiny lips, panting slightly, was the only sight you got before he pulled you back to him, wanting more of your taste.

It’s like he’s trying to attach himself to your cunt, making out with it in such a sloppy manner, drool and juices dripping onto the sheets. He’d lick you through the entire orgasm, letting out moans at how your walls tighten around his tongue, feeling your sweetness gush around. 

Your pussy might just be his favorite treat. Stressful day? Licking your pussy. Bored? Probably licking your pussy. It quickly becomes one of his favorite things, loving each time you moan and praise him, feeling himself get harder than a rock. 

The look of bliss on his face when he’s done making out with your cunt, oh it’s just so beautiful. Panting, lower face drenched, the way his eyes look down at how swollen your cunt is, how sloppy it is after he ripped nth orgasms out of you. He didn’t mean to make that much of a mess, but he really can’t help himself when it’s his new favorite thing.

[claiestve]

some isaac fluff/comfort to recover from your last one? 😭

maybe when lover has a really long day with their cases and isaac takes care of them? 🥹

(also love you and your amazing writings 💗)

𝐘𝐨𝐮 & 𝐌𝐞 ꨄ Isaac

˜”* ❝𝙅𝙪𝙨𝙩 𝙖 𝙡𝙞𝙩𝙩𝙡𝙚 𝙩𝙤𝙪𝙘𝙝, 𝙢𝙮 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙡𝙙 𝙨𝙩𝙤𝙥𝙨.❞

⎯⎯ ୨ ୧ ⎯⎯

ꜱʏɴᴏᴘꜱɪꜱ: ɪꜱᴀᴀᴄ ʜᴇʟᴘꜱ ʏᴏᴜ ᴜɴᴡɪɴᴅ.

⎯୨⎯ " " ⎯୧⎯

“Pickle, I’m gonna go somewhere later, wanna come?” You hear from the other room. It doesn’t ring any bells though because you were so engrossed in your work. Not even looking anywhere that wasn't your laptop. The case you were working on was extremely stressful because there were so many possibilities and you couldn’t afford to make any mistakes. 

The problem with this was, you didn’t have much time for Isaac. He wasn’t too clingy because he knew fully well how much the job takes over the brain. However, he found himself being more… eager. Eager to see you, to hear you, to finally be near you while you guys sleep, all of it. You guessed he was just feeling affectionate but it never crossed your mind that it would be because of your absence. 

“Pickle?”

You still didn’t answer. It’s not like you didn’t hear it. Your body was just so numb to any vocal cues because of how dangerously long you’ve been on this case. 

The door knob rattles a bit before the door opens. Standing in the doorframe is Isaac with a frown on his face. You saw him but it didn’t alarm you like it normally would’ve. On a normal day, you would’ve been very quick to ask what was wrong even if it was something tiny. Not today though.

Isaac approaches you reaching for your hand. 

“You’re doing it again.” He says with a frown. 

“Doing what?” You ask without looking away from your work. 

“You know what. You’re being unresponsive.”

Ironically, you didn’t answer to that. Isaac sighs and sits down next to you. At first, he waited for some kind of acknowledgment from you but after a while, he realized you wouldn’t give any. He sighs a little louder but it’s ignored by you. He tries going for your hand but you didn’t even flinch at that. 

As you're staring at the screen, you can only wonder if you would be able to finish this case with the right information. You seem so lost in the case but your chaotic thoughts are quickly silenced once your screen goes black.

“Hi, Pickle, this is the real world.” Isaac sarcastically greets you but you’re not too fond of it. Of course, Isaac doesn’t care. He wants you to relax, at least for a minute. 

“You’re so annoying.”

“You weren’t answering me! Plus, I missed you.”

“We’re being clingy now, Isaac?” You smile at him. He laughs a little and leans his head on yours. 

“Come to bed, Pickle.”

He gently drags you out of the study by your hand.

“I thought you were going somewhere?”

“It can wait for tomorrow. I’d rather go with you tomorrow than leave you like this but unsupervised.”

He proceeds to take you into the bedroom where you immediately feel at ease even being in there. You could feel a huge weight coming off your shoulders being replaced with excitement to lay down and sleep. Isaac helped you into bed, making you lean on him. 

“How do you feel about oatmeal for breakfast tomorrow, Pickle?”

“Don’t tell me you are planning on making breakfast. I’ll do it.”

“Nope. Tomorrow, you’re going to lay here until it’s time for you to eat.”

You two share some laughter along with other banter. You appreciated Isaac and his efforts. He was always willing to do stuff for you. He’d be unserious, for you. He’d be ‘clingy’, for you. He’d do anything for you. You looked at him and sighed. 

“Thank you, Isaac. It’s been really exhausting these past few days and I’ve missed you a lot.”

“Of course. I noticed how bad it was getting and I had to step in.”

“I love you, Isaac.”

“I love you too, Pickle. Sleep well.”

He kissed your forehead before pulling you in closer. 

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈

so my dumbass asked for requests a while ago and i realized that half of them i didn't do so im making up for it now

thank u 4 requesting, ily

[arduadastra]

An unhinged recap of TLOU EP3

Honestly read at your own peril, I cried a lot in this one

*spoilers ahead*

So right off the bat I played TLOU with my partner very soon after it came out, and then again.....and again......(and again) a few more times so I thought I was ready for this. I was ready for grissly asshole bill needing to go find Frank because he's only gone and got himself in some shit and yeah joel and ellie come along I know where a battery is but oh no Frank got bit?! and have a cry but did we get that? No. Do i wish we did? Absolutely not.

But i am kinda bummed we didnt get pedro pascal caught upside down shooting at zombies because of Frank's trap....thats one of my all time favourite scenes

ANYWAY

The whole set up to Bill and who he is, is done so well and with comedy too. It's meant to be ridiculous in a way that someone like bill, a prepper and lets be real we all know one, who 9/10 is called crazy is now the smart one and we see him living his best solo life in his mini town

5. Years pass im thinking huh, that isnt too long, we arent up to present day yet and then i see my boy frank in a hole and im thinking OH YEAHHHH we get some BACKSTORY

6. "there is no girl" "i know" - why did this make me laugh yet cry in the same breath? its so bloody unfair people can grow up without knowing what it is to love and be loved simply because some assholes out there made it 'not the norm' and considering how bill grew up, im sure that didnt help either.

7. "have you done this before?" "no"

8. Young joel in that sunshine? eating with that fork on a fancy plate with pedro's non grey hair and looking clean as frick? this was for the pedro simps and i APPROVE

8.5 MY BOYS JUST WANNA GROW STRAWBERRIES OK

9. the raiders hit, im thinking SHIT here we go, this is when theyre gonna kill frank and joel and ellie will show up and bill will be an asshole and joel will think nothing of it and ill be screaming at my tv and all will be right in the wor- wait what BILL GOT HIT?!

10. oh he's fine

11. Frank isn't though

12. This is where im prepping myself right? I KNEW since i started this episode that he would die, he died in the game and he's gotta die here but im not liking this.

13. Bill stop naming Frank's pills fun names im literally crying

14. Frank: "This is my last day" Me:

15. I dont need to write the speech he made because honestly if i did i'll just cry again and im writing this on my laptop and i really cant afford a new one but you all know that made you cry too

16. THEY. GOT. MARRIED. ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME?! ARE YOU?! BECAUSE THIS SUCCEEDED MAN YOU DID IT - WELL DONE

17. Now here i am, tears streaming down my face when you lose something you cannot replace Frank has drunk the wine, im a puddle and then Bill.....this mother fricker....downs his glass and im thinking wait a miniute here....this isnt what happened in the game

18. "objectively.....that is very romantic"

19. ........ *frank castle voice* wait wait wait wait wait WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT

20. my ass is in denial right, im like nah ok bill is gonna wake up and that'll be horrifying and heartbreaking because now hes forced to live on without the love of his life and joel and ellie arrive and his door is locked and i knew this aint the way it's gonna be

21. the letter. I need say nothing more.

22. So after ALL THAT, all the sobbing and crying and pact and 'we left a window open' they're just gonna throw at me some joel and ellie bonding in the car? theyre gonna give me the game quotes of 'what you say goes' ????????????????

TLDR: EP3 was beautiful and heartwarming and then soul sucking all at once. While i didnt get my refirdgerator scene i got something so much more and I loved them for that. Now im just hoping ellie found those magasines because best BELIEVE thats another of my all time favourite scenes from the game

[frostyreturns]

When my last computer died I vowed I was never buying Apple or Windows ever again, now I’m vowing to never buy an acer chromebook, these computers are pieces of shit. I bought it when everything was locked down and I didn’t have much choice or money.

- Battery already giving me problems wont charge beyond like 12% so the battery life is now like ten minutes. And its built like a macbook where I can’t just pop it out buy a new one and replace it.

- functionless desktop..there’s no desktop shortcuts I can’t drag and drop icons to and from it for easier access I just get a big blank screen that doesn’t even have a functional wallpaper system. If I want to post a custom photo as my wallpaper I have to dig through every single image on my computer to find it because it only gives you preset google provided images and one giant folder labelled “my images” 

- It has a shelf/dock but it constantly removes items I put there everytime I’m not looking. I keep tryint to pin my settings to the shelf and yet eveytime I go to use it the icon has disappeared from the shelf. It’s like im in a fight with a roommate over where a table goes but there’s no roommate and every day I just find the table in the spot where I moved it from before bed. You’re my fucking computer you are a thing, I own you, I paid for you, you don’t get a say... do what I fucking tell you.

- Flimsiest fucking plastic piece of shit I’ve ever seen in a piece of technology. The plastic on the screen feels like it’s made out of what chinese knockoff toys at the dollar store are made out of, you have to brace the entire screen with both hands when opening it and closing it or you’ll snap it. 

- Every once in a while will just randomly shut off and not turn off, figured out that a little garden varety static was shorting it out.

- keys not backlit, so it’s unusable at nighttime.

- no compatibility with anything, wont recognize or run an external disc drive so I cannot use it for any physical media whatsoever. Can’t watch dvds on it, can’t upload music to it...nothing. 

- Every browser other than chrome is suspiciously unusable. Browsers that on every other device run and work smoothly run like bricked dogshit.

- Worst of all it makes you sign in to google to use it at all. 

- Awful word processer, you can type words and that’s it. Making it useless as a writing laptop. Your options are use google docs and upload everything you ever type straight to google or here’s a text program that lets you type words but has literally no other function at all. Makes everything a formatting nightmare if I actually have to send something to someone.

There are no good options for computer anymore, you just have to find the one that doesn’t suck complete ass and it’s none of them. They’ve taken all the fun out of technology and the bad parts just keep getting worse. Fuck everyone at apple, fuck Bill Gates and everyone at microsoft and fuck everbody at google I hate you all you’re all bad people and you’ve all made the world a worse place eat shit and get fucked.

[worldofgoo]

yayayay yippee (≧◡≦) i love how vibrant & lively your art is, i think my fav pieces are Horse Surgery & hanyuu (even tho i have no idea who that is) but that one wip with the rainbow is also v ery special 2me because it reminds me of my fav kind of weather ^_^ generic Which Program Do You Use question & also which programs have you tried so far? which one would you recommend for someone whose only experience so far wiht digital art has been scribbling in ms paint -_-? on topic, what do you draw with (mouse, phone, drawing tablet, ??) & was it easy for you to get used to digital art? i always get overwhelmed by the amound of different functions available so im not sure where to even start, any advice? which physical art forms do you like / would you like to learn (anything at all, i personally have been getting into air dry clay... well actually ive been using my sisters playdoh but maybe ill purchase smthn fancier :3) & final question how do you come up with poses to draw? your characters (+creatures) seem very animated and i really like that :)

HI okay i guess ill answer these in a list. actually will put it under the cut since i ended up saying a lot (and dw i enjoy being able to talk a lot so thank you!)

-THANK YOU im glad some of my more recent works (in my more current style) are appealing 2 people! like i wanna draw my own way even though i think it gets less notes... the higurashi fanarts (hanyuu and shion) r very memorable pieces to me because its when i started doing the loose sketches with the thin lines and block colors and thats the direction i reallyreally wanted to take my style in. also the rainbow is rian my friend rian

-i draw in paint tool sai! the only program i used before that was sketchbook pro, which i didnt like because the brushes were kind of... blurry/smudgy? sai allows you to zoom in and draw pixel by pixel which is something i like, and i like the way it does its blending. its also just easier for me to understand. i didnt pay for it i think i found some deviantart page that had the link, id have to find it again

-i draw with a wacom intuos tablet! its lasted me... almost 10 years now. ive heard newer ones are poorer quality in terms of at least the nibs needing to be replaced constantly, so idk what the most recommended tablet these days is. ive drawn with my mouse and tbh it caused awful hand pain so i would not recommend this. i draw on my phone with my finger sometimes but i find doing it on my laptop easier, however it is doable once you get used to it

-the way i got into digital art... well. i still have an archive of my earliest art if you wanna see! i was 14 n just drew random shit, often lining over doodles i did on paper and coloring them in. i think esp if youre overwhelmed start with making like throwaway experimental pieces, scribble around, doodle stupid things and color them in with different brushes and see what you enjoy. and then you can just keep the files to yourself if they dont look too good or maybe itll look interesting, it depends i guess haha. the other thing that ive always found helped me was telling myself id draw every day even if it was a little scribble or the tiniest amount of work on a wip bc getting a habit going helped my art a Lot beause it helped me spend more time thinking n focusing on it

more specific advice for sai that i found useful- using clipping groups & the preserve opacity functions are both lifesavers in terms of not spending so much time trying to color in the lines. if you color in a base layer you can just put everything above it as a clipping group and just not worry about it anymore. i also really like using the filters (like multiply) to mess around with the colors a drawing has, though sometimes its more effective to just select a layer/individual color and fuck with the hue/saturation/etc until it looks good. when i color, esp when its not turning out how i wanted to, i rely on shifting colors A LOT. n also mixing colors together using a blending brush and then colorpicking the intermediate color. very useful

-for the most part i stick to uncolored pencil doodles on like, notebook paper (even though i have some fancy supplies X[ one day) but i LOVE making things with clay, wish it was more accessible to do at home. i have a handful of clay animal statues and stuff that i made in my ceramics class in high school. would looove to do more

-because my poses tend to be very pushed/cartoony using references of real people isnt always useful (though obv knowing the basics of anatomy always helps) so in those cases ill use other cartoony art i like as inspiration, i try to see what i like about their poses nd emulate that with my own. sometimes when im struggling ill just do a bunch of studies where i copy art i like to try to get a feel for what im missing. mostly ive realized i like when the pose conveys some level of like, volume and taking up a 3D space (which im still definitely not a master of but bullshitting it can be fun). and i also like to have a balance of curved and angular shapes. sometimes i try to just do a pose that conveys a specific emotion or i just make shit up lol

alsooooo i cant reccomend aimless doodling enough! just random shapes, turning the random shapes into creatures, trying and trying and trying different ways to draw something until you like it, i feel like the things my hand makes when i shut my brain off and just scribble can inspire me as well, and i try to emulate whatever i made by chance while doodling. and if your doodles turn out better in traditional i tend to consider using a photo of a drawing as a way to skip the "preliminary sketch" phase nd drawing a rough sketch over that which i then use for my drawing (or just directly color since i draw very fast/lazy...)

[lazeecomet]

Le Van Saga

Ok this has to its own post because there is so much backstory

Several years back i bought a Mercedes Sprinter 2500 cargo van with my mom to turn into a Glamper Van (that's Glamorous Camping). i want to road trip it across the US. she wants to go camping with a full size queen bed and a table to use her laptop at.

she has gone glamping several times. i've been stuck driving it in rush hour traffic to and from work instead of road tripping because my EV car broke (different post. still mad about that)

when we bought it, we wanted to take it in for a checkup but the only Mercedes dealership that would work on it was several cities over. most dealerships dont work on vans for some reason. so we take it 30 min away, it gets a clean bill of health.

the day after we get it back, it starts surging in residential traffic and i have to slam on the breaks to prevent the van from rear ending someone. the dash lights up with the ABS light, traction control light, wheel slip light, and check engine light. because im me, i've got a OBD2 scan tool on me and check the code: Left Wheel Speed Sensor Error

we take it back and learn that the wheel speed sensors are a recall item. a factory defect allows water to get into the sensor and cause it to fail prematurely. Parts and labor are waved but the van stays there for 3 weeks due to supply chain issues because covid

when we we get it back they have only replaced the LEFT sensor. when we inquire about the right, they told us since it was currently working they would not be able to replace it under recall. the recall only extended to sensors that had failed. not wanting them to keep the van for any more time (as we are still building it out and this has delayed us) we grumble and take it back. its good for about 1 year

on the way back from Glamping, the car kicks my mom out of cruse control and throws up all those warning lights again. this time the code reader says its the RIGHT sensor

we take it in and they find that an O ring has failed in the axle. all the gear oil has leaked down the axle shaft and flooded the right speed sensor. the entire axle has to be replaced. THEY DO NOT REPLACE THE SPEED SENSOR. when we ask why, they say that once they dried it out from all the oil, it was fine.

this month i took the van in for a checkup. i bought the 80K miles package (we are at 72K but i dont want to push it) and the car gets a full service. filters and belts and pumps are replaced along with the engine AND transmission oil. (get your transmission oil FLUSHED every 50K miles. Flushed not serviced. removed and replace all of it. the manufacturers say its "lifetime fluid" but that "lifetime" is 1 year after the power-train warranty expires) and the van is running great

the week after it comes back i hit a speed bump and the familiar 4 come back. ABS, traction control, wheel slip, and check engine. there is only 1 thing in my mind that can be. right speed sensor has finally failed (i've lost my scan tool so i cant check)

we take it in and i tell the service manager basically the same thing in this post. as usual, he does not put my diagnosis in the report. just the symptoms. today when i picked it up, he applauded my diagnosis skills because i was exactly right. The Right Wheel Speed Sensor failed. since the car had JUST been in the shop, the diagnosis fee was waved and since the part failed, it was FINALLY covered under the recall and replaced at no parts/labor cost.

when i got home, i read over the report and noticed something. the tech wrote "right speed sensor reads high speed intermittently and reports different speed then other 3 sensors"

OTHER 3 SENSORS

theres STILL 2 FUCKING WHEEL SPEED SENSORS THAT HAVE NOT BEEN REPLACED YET. WE'VE ONLY BEEN LOOKING AT THE BACK TIRES!!!

i thought we were finally done with this. i dont want to ever make an update post about this

[molluskzone]

the thing that i dont get about digital art / AI comparisons (saying theyre both "cheating" in the same way, which ive seen a few times from both pro-AI and anti-AI people) is that in AI the only input is like... the text. it doesnt just make things easier or faster, it completely removes your creative control over a piece and automates the entire process. it's like... typing your essay out on google docs (easier and faster than writing by hand, you have access to spell check and dont need to erase or scribble out words you want to remove, formatting is much easier, etc) vs just inputting a prompt into chatGPT. do you understand the comparison im making here? it's literally the exact same concept, except i've never seen someone say that typing your essay on a laptop is cheating because "it's easier which makes you lazy and not a REAL writer, you're the same as the people trying to pass of chatGPT as their own writing".

also, if we're going there... all of the "cheats" you can do with digital art are entirely possible in traditional art (minus stuff like animation which are absolute HELL to do traditionally, especially 3d animation, but that's besides the point). so i don't even get the art-purist "you-can't-call-yourself-a-true-artist" pretentious argument here. YES, traditional art takes longer and costs more to make (you can buy a tablet once for 200 dollars, and connect it to a laptop which most people already have (or just use your phone/tablet which is even cheaper), and then have that be your only expense for YEARS except for replacement pen nibs and cables. meanwhile, sketchbooks are expensive and you need to constantly buy them, colored pencils are expensive if you're serious about it because you need a lot of different colors, paintings are on another level when it comes to materials cost, etc). i genuinely respect traditional artists since that shit is tedious. HOWEVER... saying that digital art is "cheating" kind of reveals to me that you're just unaware of all the potential "cheats" in traditional art. yes, theres some skills you need to learn, like coloring evenly with colored pencils or alcohol markers, or learning brush techniques and blending, color mixing, color matching, taking good photos of your art if you are someone who wants to post on social media, but there are ALSO unique skills you need to learn in digital art, such as managing layer types, learning to disconnect your eyes / hand (if you don't have a screen tablet), optimizing the image for digital viewing, color choosing (WAY HARDER TO DO DIGITALLY THAN TRADITIONALLY). they're equivalent in this way.

however... layering? use a light box and separate your sketch and coloring / lineart layers. undo? use a light box. quickly change colors? plan ahead better. physically paint over part of the piece. want to make multiple colored versions of a piece? cut out a lino block and use different colored ink to make prints. scan the drawing, print out more and color over them. tracing? fucking put the piece of paper over your laptop screen and trace it (we were expected to do this for practice in my high school art classes). mirroring / "flipping the canvas"? hold drawing up to mirror. if youre drawing on paper, hold it up to the sun or use a light box and flip it. symmetry? you can buy tools for this in which you hold a physical mirror up to half of your drawing and trace the reflection. we also used these in art class. you can also use tracing paper for this- it's my preferred method for making symmetrical traditional art, and for redrawing parts of a sketch / full piece that i want to move around or replace. color picking? any method you use digitally you can also use traditionally. the only trouble is IMPLEMENTING said colors in a full piece... but you also have to do that digitally. the biggest hurdle in color picking for traditional art is just... not having the resources to create a certain color easily, but that's a "can't afford a lot of paints / colored pencils / markers" issue, not necessarily a skill issue. even photobashing reference images or rearranging a piece is possible traditionally if you like... cut the sketch out and rearrange it physically before tracing over it, or physically making a reference with the same method. it is not hard and i have done this traditionally before. you can also use tracing paper for this. line stabilization is the only thing i've seen that's actually unique to digital art, but you can mimic this in traditional art by just... weighing down your art tool or having to redo the lineart a few times with the light box method (time consuming, yes, but not necessarily skillful. it just takes longer if you're bad at it, but the SAME results are possible). different layer types? just do the "math" in your head and figure it out. ive literally mimicked multiply layers before without actually using a multiply layer just to see if i COULD, and the results were the same. the only fully 100% true comparison i've seen is that stuff like AI-generated coloring and shading applied to digital art are "cheating" but that's... not digital art at that point... you're just making an argument again AI specifically because they are separate... it's closer to someone recreating an AI image themselves, or editing an AI image to make it look more realistic, which are, again, separate topics. also you can literally shade and fix traditional art with AI too if you take good enough photos of your art so this isn't even really a good argument against digital art specifically, it's an AI issue.

the only argument i see that makes sense is that traditional art, digital art, CGI animation, and AI art are all their own mediums that all require different skill sets (though i'd argue that traditional art and digital art are much more similar to each other in what skills you need than any of them are to AI art, but whatever). which i honestly kind of agree with? or i would is AI art was more ethical and not used in really dumb ways. but i personally think the AI slop is ugly, and my main gripe with it is that people try to "trick" others into believing AI art is real art by refusing to label it, or even labeling it maliciously incorrectly by naming fake artists as a credit for the image. you can't really do this with digital art since it's... pretty obvious when someone is creating something digitally. you know exactly what you're getting.

i think its fine if you want to say that traditional art is better or that you respect it more, because you're allowed your own opinion (even if i think you should at least experience drawing digitally before making a snap judgment). but its not "cheating" and its certainly not comparable to AI

[allisonlol]

BSD MEN WHEN YOU HUG YOUR PLUSHIE/PILLOW INSTEAD OF THEM AHHHH IVE BEEN THINKING OF YHIS SINCE FIREVER

a/n: BRO this is so cute?? picked some of my favorite boys for it. ALSO have y'all seen the season 4 trailer?? literally still shaking from it, i am so so happy :D !! jumped around my room screaming cuz i'm a bit unhinged for it

but what i'm NOT so happy about is my ipad completely breaking out of nowhere?? (chuuya's beautifulness in the trailer broke it) so im writing this with my laptop?? sad but at least i can type faster >:)

warnings: NONE just absolute fluff

(Chuuya, Ranpo, Nikolai, Jouno) When You Hug Your Plushie Instead of Them

Chuuya

so chuuya had recently bought you a plushie that you'd been fawning over cuz it was the cutest thing ever (after him, ofc)

litte did he know that it would soon replace him-

that night, chuuya smiled at you when he noticed you hugging the plushie while scrolling on your phone before bed

but he quickly got fed up when he realized you just?? weren't going to cuddle with him too??

regrets buying you that thing REAL quick

nudges your arm and tries to get your attention but you just shoot him a smile and go back to your phone

chuuya's patience meter is miniscule so now he's pissed off (at the plushie tho?? not at you)

does that thing where he'll just sit there and keep sighing dramatically until you ask what's wrong smh

once you do, he's like "NOTHING'S WRONG" but avoids looking you in the eye and instead looks past you or down at the sheets?? and that's when you know he's upset 🤕

you move the plushie aside and open your arms to hug him instead

ngl you knew he wanted to cuddle but thought it would be funny to tease him... APOLOGIZE RN

bro glares at you?? he's trying to give you the cold shoulder but fails and smiles softly cuz you look so cute

grabs you and has a vice grip on you the rest of the night- also probably kicks the plushie to the floor when ur not looking

Ranpo

ranpo is a cuddle bug who wants ALL of your attention on him

so it's safe to say he's not very happy that u have found...something else to hug

ranpo had arrived home late due to detective work, so you'd already fallen asleep while waiting for him

except you struggle to sleep now without hugging something (since you're so used to doing that with him). so you simply grabbed one of ur plushies to hold instead

literally shakes you awake so frantically you think there's an emergency

you're all like "what's going on!! :0" & then bro makes it sound like ur cheating on him??

"i can't believe you would abandon me for...for THAT thing!!!!" points his finger at you all accusingly and everything

snatches the plushie from you and throws it across the room >:0

will then proceed to plop down next to you and just. not speak 😐😐

^ignores your protests as you get up to grab the plushie and gives you the nastiest side eye?? childish i stg

you sigh and prop the plushie at the end of the bed so you can crawl up next to ranpo and wrap your arms around him

he finally stops pouting and melts into ur touch 😽

AAAA I CAN FINALLY USE GIFS FOR THEM

Nikolai

worse than ranpo. like significantly

you'd gone to take a nap and had instinctively fallen asleep hugging ur favorite plushie

nikolai was doing who knows what but ended up entering the room about an hour later

stops dead in his tracks when he sees you...hugging...something ELSE?!

doesn't wake you at first. sneaks over to peer over ur shoulder at what you're holding

partially relieved to see it's just a plushie, but also partially mad because um?? why wasn't it him??

doesn't even bother waking you. just straight up yanks it out of your grasp 💀

you wake up in a panic with this mf LOOMING over you

probably rips it's head off???? or at least threatens to

pls you're lowkey about to cry cuz that's your comfort plushie 😥😥

you literally gotta scramble out of bed and beg him not to destroy it

does the thing where he holds it over ur head but dangles it just out of reach. and this mf is tall asf so good luck with that -.-

you end up just grabbing his arm and pulling his dumbass back to the bed to cuddle him instead

Jouno

ok ngl you did this on purpose to piss him off

i don't blame you cuz it be funny when he's ticked off

you and jouno had been preparing for bed when u decided to play a lil prank on him

it was mostly just to see if he'd even have a reaction?? cuz we all know this man either doesn't give a fuck or he goes off the rails

you'd gotten into bed first and while waiting for him, snatched the plushie you keep on your side and snuggled up next to it

u close ur eyes when you hear him walking into the room and pretend to be falling asleep

his footsteps stop by the bed and he just stands there like 😑???? cuz he can tell by your heartbeat that you're still awake, yet he's wondering why you haven't acknowledged his presence??

so i mean right off the bat this mf knows something's up

gets in bed next to you but goes OUT OF HIS WAY to make sure y'all are not touching in any way petty asf

can tell by the way you're positioned that you're hugging something else close to you

you peek open ur eyes to shoot him a glance but he has the most unreadable expression i stg

internally he is like WHY NOT ME WHY NOT ME but no one else would be able to tell~

by now he's figured out that ur messing with him and does NOT take it lightly. literally sleeps with his back to you and won't acknowledge you until morning

taglist: @deadmitochondria @miycutie @scul-pted @chuuyasboots @shy-socially-awkward-intovert @beandaifuku @sonder-paradise @nervousyetconfidentway @beautiful-is-boring @irethepotato @serenareiss

[words-for-holland]

Distractions

Pairing: Tom Holland x Reader

Summary: Tom and Y/N decide to work in the same room together. The problem...both of them get easily distracted and a whole lotta fluff comes with it.

A/N: Whoa its been awhile but here we are again! Thank you for 1,000+ followers it means the world! Surprises to come 😉

“Hello beautiful.” Tom greets Y/N with a cheeky smile on his face. He quickly pecks her soft cheek as he places his laptop across from his lovely girlfriend, who was currently focused on her work.

She takes a second to look up, returning his smile with a soft one. “Hey, good looking. What’s up?”

“Nothing really. Is it okay if I work here with you? I just want to be close to my girl.”Tom pouts.

Y/N’s heart could burst at the sight and reason he gave. An inaudible “aw” prolonging through her mind...until she quickly realized that there could be some complications with this as a slight frown starts to replace her dimpled smile. “Wait...are you sure?”, she asks. “Dont you have press interviews that require absolute silence? I doubt any of you will want to hear the constant typing in the background.”

“Yeah, your typing is horrendous with those lead heavy fingertips of yours.” Tom teases.

“Well these lead heavy fingertips aren’t leaving anytime soon, so youre probably better off working elsewhere.” She suggests, pointing off to the distance. Tom groans at the idea, using his one hand to put her finger down. He engulfs hers with his, lacing her fingers and holding on tightly.

“Noooo. Dont wanna be anywhere else. Please darling? ” He pouts once more.

She giggles at his plea, rolling her eyes. “Course you can, bubz.” Tom excitedly scoots his chair in as he rubs his hands together to prep for the work to come.

And work they did...for at least 10 minutes. Tom was getting antsy as he read through his next script. Occasionally his eyes would roll to the left, and observe Y/N as she continued to read through an article on her screen. Not that Tom didnt find his own work fun but he always found watching Y/N do her thing just a bit more interesting.

He hadn’t realized himself, but his body start to shift and lean more towards her. His arm extending to wrap her in, as it glided up and down in a steady motion. His thumb doodling hearts on her shoulder. Tom could tell it had an effect on Y/N, discreetly smirking to himself as he heard her audible shakey sigh.

He wanted to see what else could make her sigh like that, so instead of his thumb he used pointer and middle finger, running them up and down her shoulder. Tom could see the smile creeping on Y/N’s face and her little head shake. She knew what he was up to and yet, Y/N still wanted him to think that he was not gonna get her that easily. But God was it hard. Every touch felt like tiny fireworks against her skin, goosebumps forming all over her body with every touch. She to stay strong. No distractions.

Tom eyes perked up, at the action. He must go further, he thinks. Tom starts to trace his nose from her shoulder to her neck, leaving kisses at her jawline. “C’mon darling. Think its time for a break.”, he whispers in her ear.

She turns her head towards him as she smiles, leaving a quick kiss on Tom’s lips. “Its only been ten minutes.” She laughs. “Five if you want to count the distractions.”

He backs up, pretending to look appalled. “How dare you. I’ve been a good lad focusing on my script for the whole ten minutes.”

A playful glare formed on Y/N’s soft face which ultimately ended her up with a fit of giggles. She couldnt take him seriously, but then again she never did with anything. Tom has always said if they were kidnapped by a pair of robbers, her first reaction would be to laugh. As the laughter died down, Y/N paid her attention back to the screen which had been inactive during the playful banter and continued to type out those set of documents that she had been meaning to get to.

Tom on the other hand was still reading through his script, taking mental notes on how he was going to approach his character. This time he was completely engrossed in his work. His eyes moving left to right with every line he took in. Until...he felt something ticking his lower calves. Tom knew it was Y/N’s foot, by the way it brushed just as he had done with his hand on her shoulder. The movements never stopped, her legs now curling around his own. Y/N was trying to getting back at him, but one thing she always forgot was that Tom always wins.

Naturally he had to the same, and what once became a playful game of footsie, now ended up with Tom shifting Y/N to sit on his lap. Her legs now wrapped around his waist and his hands holding onto her hips. Both of them connecting their soft lips, feeling every spark and essence of love. He looked up at Y/N with admiration, thinking how lucky he is to have her in his life. Yeah Covid sucked for the most part and limited their ability to even do anything exciting outside, but it gave them the opportunity to be with each other far more than they could have on a normal day. On a normal day, Tom would be jumping around country to country while Y/N would be home miles and miles away from him. Course, nothings changed with jumping from country to country, but Tom gets to bring Y/N with him now and thats all that mattered to them.

But work never stopped them from keeping busy. Just as their kisses were getting more heated, and their hands tangling each others hair both their alarms went off. The couple stopped their antics as they leaned their heads back, groaning in synchronization.

“Ughh. Thats my cue. I have to prep for an interview.” He mumbles as he nuzzles into Y/N’s neck.

“I know. I have to get ready for another business meeting. Whoo.” she speaks in a sarcastic manner, dropping her head.

“What time?” He asked pressing a kiss to the shell of her ear.

“Mm...3. Why?”

Tom plays with the strands of her soft hair. “Was wondering if you’ll stay with me through mine and Ill stay with you through yours.”

“As much fun as that would be. I dont think were allowed to —“

“Im not saying we have to be on camera for each others meeting. But if one of us will be off camera itll be all right.” He plans, still looking at his girl with pleading eyes. Y/N’s mouth twitches to the left, her eyes furrowed with suspicion.

“You’re doing it again.” Tom states, a small chuckle escaping his lips.

“Doing what?”

“You’re making that face again.”

Her expression quickly changes to confusion, not entirely sure of what Tom was noticing that she didnt about her own face. “What face?”, she asks.

“The one where you twitch your lips and make your eyes look angry. You only do it when youre indecisive about something. Its bloody adorable.”

Y/N snorts at his comment, and tries to get off to give him time to prepare, only to be stopped by his hands pushing her back down on his lap.

“I was serious about wanting to stay with my girl the whole day while doing work. Please?” He pleads again, this time bringing out the puppy face. “I’ll be good and do the dishes tonight.”

To be fair, Y/N knew she was always gonna say yes to Tom. Its pretty hard to deny her dorky boyfriend when hes asking so sweetly and just wants to spend the day together. More so, if the roles were switched, she would have done the same thing. “Go get changed movie star, before youre late for your interview.” She murmurs to him, kissing his cheek before she scrambles of his lap to sit across from him.

Tom whoops with victory as he runs out the room quickly changing into his shirt, fixing his hair, and adding glasses for that sophisticated touch. Sure he wanted to look his best for the Cherry Press, but he made sure his outfit was something Y/N would very much adore as well.

“How do I look?” Tom asked coming out of their shared bedroom.

Y/N looks up from her computer, and smiles widely. “Handsome as always.” She couldnt take her eyes off of him, admiring every detail of the clothing and how it perfectly complimented Tom’s feature. She eyed him from top to bottom, until she noticed something. “Uhh..honey....you’re not wearing any pants.” She asked a bit confused. Her eyes engrossed in the muscles of his thighs and the fit of his Calvin Klein boxers.

Tom smirks at her. “Its uncomfortable wearing pants. Besides no one will see...except you.” He teases, gently lifting her head up so that her eyes meets his. “Eyes up here love.”

“Youre something else.” She laughs, feeling the heat rise in her cheeks. “Well...least we know who wears the pants in the relationship.”

Tom laughs loudly at her comment. He hooks the waistband of Y/N’s sweatpants and snaps them back to further prove her point. “That was a good one. Ill give you that.” Tom and Y/N high five each other, and then it was press time.

Y/N kept quiet and tried her best to minimize the typing unless it was really needed. Seeing Tom talk about his work and dedication was something that she had always admired about him. He loved his job and everyone can see that. Occasionally they’d steal glances from each other, smiling and holding each others hand under table so that no one could see. But it was just one of those moments that Tom and Y/N couldnt help themselves too. Two hours passed and Tom was free.

“You did so well.” Y/N praised Tom and awarded him with a quick kiss. “I love it when you talk about your passion.”

“Thanks. I love that you were there with me to sit through it all.” He smiles. “I believe its your turn now. It’s almost 3.”

Y/N frowns, knowing shed have to dread through hers. Instead of getting to talk about her passions, itd all be about business, business, business. “Ugh. Do I have to?”she groans.

“Come on now. Dont be like that, you’re gonna be fine. Ill be here with you the whole time.” Tom reassures her with kisses all over her face.

“No distractions?” She asks.

“No distractions.”

[viastro]

all for love | xu minghao

ミ★ synopsis: when you cough up the petals, you’re left with two choices. undergo the surgery where you’ll lose the love you have for the person that caused the disease, or tragically die with your love unrequited. [ requested by @adoreateez ]

ミ★ genre: hanahaki!au, angst, some fluff, some humor

ミ★ warnings: vomiting/coughing of flowers

ミ★ word count: 9,478

ミ★ pairings: xu minghao x gender neutral reader

ミ★ notes: hi guys ! i’m so sorry this is so late omg, i know that you requested it like a month ago AAAA i hope you like it tho </333 i know it might not be as angsty as you may have wanted </333 think it could be better but i </333 hope it’s okay </333 i also don’t know how this oneshot ended up being so long im cryin real tears NAKJESGKDTB

ミ★ taglist: @sunlightwoo​ @coppertrashi​ @sweetsoonhan​ @brinnalaine​ @minluvly​ @wonunuu​ @suhfluffy​ @shuajeong​ @euphorencia​ @imjustuhhvibing​ @minghao-will-be-the-death-of-me​ @shuahaeee​ @jaeyuni​ @sunflowergyeomie​ @cheolliehugs​ @smileyjmvn @chanberriees @vi-nnx​ @kodzumo​ @dwcljh​ @thanky0uverykamsa​

“Minghao!” The black haired beauty turns at the call of his name, a warm smile forming on his face when he lays eyes on you standing at the doorway of the dance studio, convenience store bag in hand. He reaches his hand up and waves you over, giggling when you speed walk over to him while greeting the other dance team members.

“What are you doing here? I thought I was supposed to come get you after your shift ended.” Minghao asks, taking the bag you’re holding out to him and peeking inside. He lets out a breath when he sees his favorite snacks sitting in it, feeling an immense wave of gratitude hit him when he looks back up towards you.

“My manager sent me home early since it wasn’t busy, so I decided to buy some food for you! Some of it is for me though, since I’ll be sitting here waiting for hours—”

“Dance practice ends in 15 minutes.”

“Hours for your practice to finish.” You continue, and Minghao chuckles when you go the extra mile to wipe away a nonexistent drop of sweat from your forehead. He opens his mouth to tease you, only to stop when Jun, Soonyoung and Chan pull you into an unsuspecting group hug. A laugh escapes Minghao when he sees the look of horror on your face when you’re suddenly yanked from behind.

“MINGHAO! I’m being kidnapped by the three stooges!” 

“The fuck did they just call us?” 

Minghao rolls his eyes when the four of you begin to bicker, instead walking over to his phone to turn on the song they have to practice for the showcase in a couple months. Your eyes trail after him, slightly tuning out Soonyoung begging you to watch him during their practice so that he can hear your feedback. 

“Yn! You’re not even listening to me.” Soonyoung whines, resting his forehead onto your shoulder in defeat. Your head snaps back towards the blonde, smiling and patting the back of his neck to try and console him. “I’ll watch you, I’ll watch you. Don’t worry.” 

The self-proclaimed tiger friend of yours looks back up at you with a happy grin, and you chuckle at the sight. You reach up and pat his face with your hands, before motioning towards the dance floor where Jun and Chan are already preparing.

“Go and practice! You’re like a little hamster.” You say with a laugh, and he rolls his eyes at you. Minghao watches from the speakers, letting out a giggle when he sees the way Soonyoung’s smile immediately turns into a frown when you mention the cute animal.

“I’m a tiger, yn!”

“You’re a furry is what you are.” The three laugh at your retort, and Soonyoung bites back a chuckle in an attempt to still appear to be mad at you. He opens his mouth to respond, only for his eyes to widen in panic when a hand covers his face and pulls him backwards. 

“Practice ends soon. I’ll treat you after for the snacks, okay?” Minghao says to you, still holding back Soonyoung as the blonde struggles against his hold. You bite back your giggles at the ridiculous sight, instead nodding your head at your best friend. Taking a bite of the fish-shaped ice cream sandwich you bought for yourself, you motion towards the dance floor where the rest of the team is waiting. 

Minghao just sends you a pretty smile, practically dragging Soonyoung against his will towards the mirrors. You laugh softly at the sight, sitting down onto the floor as you watch them begin to practice.

You told Soonyoung that you’d watch him, but you find that your eyes keep trailing over to Minghao instead.

You quietly watch Minghao paint on the canvas from across the art studio, knowing that when he splatters paint it can get almost everywhere. 

You learned that the hard way. 

Rest in Peace, Nike AF1s.

The sunlight rests over his features, making his black hair appear brown. The honey-like color of his skin is glowing underneath the sun, and you find yourself thanking the weather for this sight that lies before you.

“Mm, you’re staring.” You blink when Minghao peeks at you with a smile, catching you in the act. You squint, turning away and laying onto your back on the couch. Pulling out your phone, you go to YouTube to watch a mukbang, effectively ignoring Minghao’s giggles as he looks at you. 

He shakes his head, hair falling over his eyes as he looks back towards the canvas and gently presses the paintbrush against it. 

You mindlessly scroll through Twitter for another thirty minutes when you suddenly feel a presence above you. You slowly lower your phone from your face, only to lock eyes with an amused looking Minghao hovering above you. Warmth floods your face immediately as you look at the rather compromising position the two of you are in. 

Minghao’s leaning over you, hand resting on the back of the couch. His long hair is falling over his face, and he has a small smile on his face as he stares down at you.

Unable to think of something to say, you slowly bring your phone back up to your face so that you don’t have to look at him any longer. Minghao laughs at your actions, leaning back so that he’s standing at his full height. 

“Come on, I’m done painting for today. We can go get food.” Your ears perk up at the mention of food, and you immediately stand up from the sofa. You give Minghao a bright smile, and a fond grin forms on his face at the sight. 

“Are you paying this time?” You ask teasingly as you and Minghao start walking out of the room, and the black haired beauty purses his lips, before nodding his head. “Since you waited for me to finish painting, I’ll pay this time.” 

You punch the air out of excitement, and Minghao rolls his eyes as he watches you. He reaches out and wraps his arm around you, stopping you mid-punch. He pats your head, and you turn to look at him. 

You feel your heart stutter within your chest as the two of you stare at each other in silence for a moment. His brown eyes hold so much depth to them, so much warmth whenever he looks at you. To anyone else, they may mistake it for romantic love.

But you know better.

You giggle and wrap your arm around Minghao, “Where are you taking me for lunch? Teriyaki?” 

“I was thinking of convenience store ramen?” 

“You’re so cheap.” 

“We’re two broke university students. Convenience store ramen is luxury, yn.” 

The two of you burst into laughter at Minghao’s response, even though you both know it’s true. You tease each other the rest of the way to the teriyaki place, since Minghao decided to splurge just a little for you. 

As you watch Minghao order your guys’ food, you rest your hand over your heart, feeling it beat a bit harder against your chest when he turns to give you a grin. 

Letting out a sigh, you scroll through the pdf opened up on your laptop and write some more notes on the material. Minghao looks up from his own laptop at the sound of your frustration, and he purses his lips when he sees the furrow in between your eyebrows. 

Without a word, he leans across the table, reaching out and trying to soothe away the crease to your brows. Startled at the sudden contact, you slowly look up at him, seeing the look of accomplishment on his face as he sits back down in his chair once you’re no longer frowning. 

“Minghao?” 

“Let’s just study for a bit longer and then we can go to the night market.” Minghao says with a warm smile, and you bite the inside of your cheek, nodding your head in agreement as you lean back into your chair. You begin scrolling through your pdf again, attempting to take more notes in hopes that the two of you will go to the night market soon. 

However, as the minutes pass, you find that your eyes keep trailing over to Minghao as you aimlessly scroll through your laptop. The yellow light from the lamp beside him illuminates his features beautifully, and you quietly wonder to yourself how Minghao is capable of being so pretty. 

“Okay, I’m done.” Minghao announces once he turns in his assignment. You blink your eyes before turning to your laptop and seeing your own unfinished notes. The black haired beauty raises an eyebrow at the expression on your face, knowing all too well that you haven’t finished your notes. 

“I can finish it later?” You say, voice raising at the end that it ends up sounding like you’re not too sure of that statement. Minghao grins, reaching out and patting your head fondly, making warmth blossom across your face. 

“Okay.”

“Really?”

“No. Finish your homework.” Minghao tells you, his grin now replaced with a straight face as he leans back into his chair. You let out a quiet groan, realizing that you forgot who you were studying with.

Your best friend, Xu Minghao, top of the Dean’s list.

“Why do you hate me?” You ask, trying your best to appeal with puppy dog eyes. Minghao simply rolls his eyes and pulls out his phone, chuckling when he hears you sigh in defeat. Grumbling to yourself, you’re able to finish your notes in about 15 minutes because of your newfound anger motivating you. 

You shut your laptop, causing the black haired beauty to look up at you from his phone. He tilts his head at you when you flash him a bright smile.

“Done?” 

“Done.” 

Minghao grins, standing up from the table and putting his stuff away into his bag with you following suit. You’re about to pick up your bag when Minghao walks over to your side of the table, taking your bag and slinging it over his shoulder with his own. You raise an eyebrow, “What a gentleman. Are you gonna pay for all the food I’ll get at the food stands too?” 

Minghao scoffs, nudging your shoulder as he steps away from the table, making you giggle. You follow after him, the two of you walking side by side out of the library. You both converse as you walk on the sidewalk, the warm night air enveloping you as you do so. 

You take a glance at your bag, watching as Minghao adjusts the strap over his shoulder as he hums quietly. Pursing your lips, you gently nudge his shoulder to get his attention, and he turns his head towards you. 

“Mm?” 

“I can carry my bag, you know.” You say with a grin, and Minghao just nods his head in agreement. You feel your heart stutter within your chest when he gives you that smile of his, the one that’s always so full of warmth whenever he looks at you. 

“I know.” 

“Then why—”

“Because I wanted to.” Minghao answers, tilting his head to see if you’ll ask more questions. You simply bite the inside of your cheek, nodding as you turn away to look towards the sidewalk again. You listen as Minghao begins to talk about what food he’s excited to try when the two of you arrive, and you do your best to respond.

But the tingle in your throat captures your attention for the rest of the night.

“Soonyoung!” You exclaim with a smile as you watch him trip over his own feet onto the grass, Chan toppling over him as he explodes with laughter. 

“Chan, my allergies!” 

“I have benadryl, it’ll be okay.”

“No it won’t!” 

You smile fondly as you watch Jun walk over to the two on the grass, reaching out with his hand to help them up. Suddenly you’re reminded that you came with four guys, and your eyes trail across the park until you find Minghao snapping photos of the pretty peonies. 

You watch as the warm sun rests over his features, making his black hair appear brown in the light. He pulls back from the peonies, looking through the photos he captured on his camera for a moment. After a moment, he turns his head towards you, and a fond smile immediately takes over his features. 

“You’re staring again.” Minghao calls out to you, and you roll your eyes in response. He lets out a laugh before Jun barrels over and wraps his arm around him, capturing the pretty man’s attention. You sigh, laying down onto your back on the picnic blanket as you stare up at the tree above you.

The five of you decided to have a picnic at the park today as you all finally finished the last of your finals. You and Jun cooked, while Soonyoung, Chan and Minghao prepared the stuff to bring. Once you all got to the park, you each ate your food and conversed under the warm rays of the summer sun. It was rather nice actually, having taken polaroids of each other as well to commemorate such a precious day. 

Your thoughts come to a stop when Minghao pops his head up from above you, warmth in his eyes as he stares down at you. 

“Having fun?” Minghao asks you in his soft voice, and you nod your head, giggling when you hear the loud laughter coming from the three stooges. “Of course.”

Minghao squats down and extends his hand out towards you, to which you take a hold of it, letting him help you sit up from the blanket. You raise an eyebrow when you see his arm behind his back, looking back at him with a questioning expression on your face. 

Minghao lets out a fond smile at the scrunch to your nose, before reaching out with the hand he was hiding, revealing the pretty peony. “Here.”

You stare down at the pink flower, looking at the delicate petals that are so soft to the touch. Slowly, you glance back up towards Minghao, who’s carefully watching your reaction. 

“Minghao?” 

The latter chuckles, gently waving his hand that’s holding the flower, signaling for you to take it. You reach out and take it from his grasp, looking down at the peony once again. Minghao smiles, before saying in a soft voice,

“A pretty flower for my flower.” 

Biting the inside of your cheek, your gaze slowly trails up towards Minghao, finding yourself searching his eyes for an answer to a question that you’re not even sure of. Silence settles over the two of you as you just stare into each other's eyes for a moment, trying to make each other out.

“Minghao! Yn! Let’s play badminton!” The two of you snap your heads towards Jun’s voice, seeing them grabbing the badminton rackets. Minghao raises up his arm towards the three, “Coming!” 

You watch as Minghao stands up from his squatting position, dusting off the back of his jeans before reaching out towards you with his hand. You grasp his hand, letting him pull you up from the blanket. 

“You can leave the peony here so that it doesn’t get ruined during the game.” Minghao tells you softly, and you nod your head. He grins, patting your head before heading over towards Soonyoung and Jun, who seem to be bickering over what racket they want. 

While you stare down at the peony for a moment longer, silently wondering why this small gift means so much to you. You gently place the flower down onto the picnic blanket and look over towards the four, watching as Minghao lets out a laugh at something Soonyoung said. 

Swallowing the lump in your throat, you walk over to your friends to play badminton. 

You type away on your laptop, preparing to send the email of your resume to apply as an assistant stylist at W Magazine. It’s always been a dream of yours to make it into the big leagues as a fashion stylist, but you have to start down at the lower ranks before you can achieve that.

If you get this position, then it’ll only be a confirmation that you’ll be able to accomplish your goal. 

The sound of your ringtone grabs your attention, and you take a deep breath, before submitting your application. You turn to reach for your phone resting beside you, lifting up the small piece of metal to your ear you answer, 

“Hello?”

“Yn?” You raise an eyebrow at Jun’s worried tone, sitting up on your couch. Looking over at the time, you see that it’s already 10 at night, but you know that the four are at the studio based on the loud music you hear in the background.

“Jun? What’s wrong?”

“It’s Minghao, he’s pushing himself too much again cause the showcase is in a couple weeks. He refuses to leave until he perfects the choreo.” Jun mutters, and you let out a breath, already closing your laptop and standing up from your sofa. You grab your jacket and quickly put it on before slipping into your sneakers. 

“I’ll be there soon.” You say as you walk out of your apartment, hearing Jun tell you thank you in at least four languages before hanging up the call. 

You arrive at the dance studio within 15 minutes since your apartment is right by campus, and you’re greeted by the sound of the bass booming from within the room. You’re about to open the door, only to stop when Jun steps out with a worried look on his face. He looks up at you, and lets out a tired smile. 

“Go home, Junnie. I’ll take care of him.” You tell him, and he nods his head. He pulls you into a quick hug, before walking out of the building, exhaustion evident due to the slump of his shoulders. 

You gently open the door, and your heart breaks when you see Minghao sitting on the floor, face resting in his hands as the music blares from around him. Biting the inside of your cheek, you quietly close the door, before shuffling over to the speakers and pausing the music on his phone. 

“Jun, I already told you that I’m not leaving until I finish this.” Minghao says tiredly, looking up from his hands in your direction, only to stop when he lays eyes on you standing there.

You’re just in a pair of shorts and an oversized t-shirt, your unzipped sweatshirt hanging off your shoulders. The concern is evident over your features as you stare at him from where you are, and his eyes trail down to your fiddling hands, a sign that you’re nervous. 

“Did Jun call you?” Minghao asks as he looks away from you, staring down at his knees. You nod your head, clearing the itch in your throat, “Yeah. He did.” 

Silence falls over the two of you, with Minghao holding back the tears that threaten to escape his eyes from the pent up frustration, and you knowing that they’re about to fall. You watch as the black haired beauty lowers his head, before covering his face up with his hands, shoulders beginning to shake as he cries. 

You pad your way over, sitting down beside him and extending your legs out. Gently, you grasp his shoulder and slowly maneuver him so that his head is resting on your lap, quiet sobs wracking his body as he lets you hold him. 

“It’s okay, Minghao.” You mutter softly, stroking his hair as a means to comfort him. He shakes his head at you, and you let out a small smile. 

“You did well.” 

That simple sentence sends Minghao into another wave of tears, but you just hold him quietly as you pat his head. A few minutes pass until he’s finally calmed down, and he slowly lowers his hands away from his face, now taking deep breaths to get his breathing back to normal. 

Your hand trails down to his cheek as you wipe away the remaining tears. Minghao just lets you as he stares up at the ceiling in silence, millions of thoughts and worries running through his brain. 

You know better than to ask him about what he’s thinking, though. Over the last couple years of knowing the black haired beauty, you’ve learned that Minghao will tell you what’s going on at his own pace and that he’ll only shy away the more you pester him.

So instead you say, “Come on, let’s go back to my apartment.” 

Minghao stares up at the ceiling for a moment longer, before nodding his head in agreement and sitting up from your lap. The two of you stand up off the floor, and you shuffle over to his dance bag and shove everything he brought into it. Minghao just watches you as you do so, eyes trailing after you as you walk over to the speaker and disconnect his phone, placing it into the bag as well. 

“Let’s go, Minghao.” You say as you walk over to the door, and he follows after you, exhaustion now wearing down on his body from how hard he pushed himself tonight. The two of you step out of the studio, and you let out a sigh at the warm night air. 

You both walk in a comfortable silence the rest of your way to your apartment, only having a brief exchange when you grab his spare clothes from his bag and hand it to him as he walks to your bathroom to take a shower. 

It’s like a routine for the two of you now, as this isn’t the first time this has happened. Minghao’s a perfectionist, so when something’s not right, he will push himself until he can correct it. Each of the guys learned that the hard way, as they would sometimes be victims to Minghao’s critiques. However, Minghao’s the hardest on himself. 

It’s always Minghao taking care of you in your guys’ friendship. He’s the more mature one, more level headed, more responsible — but you’re the only one who can calm him down when he gets into this headspace.

You clear your throat in a failed attempt of getting rid of the tingle that’s been bothering you for the last couple of months. Walking into your kitchen, you fill up a glass of water and down it all in one go, but to no avail. 

“I wonder if it’s cause I snore in my sleep?” You ask yourself, only to glance up when you hear your bathroom door open, a fresh Minghao stepping out of it. His hair is damp as he trudges over to your couch and lays down onto it.

“You want any dinner? I can order takeout.” You offer as you walk over to him, and he shakes his head, simply pulling the blanket over his body. Nodding your head, you let out a yawn, “I’m tired, so I’m going to head to bed. There’s leftovers in the fridge if you get hungry.” 

Minghao doesn’t respond, and you take that as a sign to turn and walk into your bedroom, only to stop when you feel the warmth of his hand grasping yours. You look back towards the pretty man, just to see him lying there with his eyes closed. 

“Minghao?” 

“Thank you, yn. I love you.” 

You hate the way your heart soars within your chest at those three words when you know fully well that Minghao means it in a platonic way. 

You’re his best friend that he loves and cares about.

And he’s your best friend that you love.

“I love you too, Minghao. Now go to sleep, mm?” You say softly, giving his hand a squeeze. He lets out a sleepy smile, before releasing his gentle grip on your hand. 

You hate the fact that your hand feels cold without him holding it.

You stare at him for a moment longer, before walking into your bedroom and closing the door behind you. You climb into your bed, feeling the tingle in your throat turn into a full blown itch as you attempt to clear it. Reaching over to your water bottle, you take a long sip before placing it back down onto the table and laying on your back, convincing yourself that it’s nothing.

It’s only a few hours later when you’re awakened by the urge to vomit and practically sprint to the bathroom, locking the door behind you. Leaning over the toilet, you sob quietly as you vomit the familiar pink petals of the flower Minghao gave you at the dead of night. 

You stare down at your blanket, fiddling with the thread as millions of thoughts run through your brain. Your eyes trail over to your phone, watching as it lights up with a new text from Jun. 

jun: yn i'm gonna break into your apartment if you don’t answer

You let out a scoff, coughing slightly as you turn off your phone. You adjust your position until you’re laying on your side and close your eyes in an attempt to get some sleep. 

It’s been a week since you coughed up the flowers and realized your tragic fate. 

You love Minghao.

Minghao doesn’t love you.

The morning after Minghao stayed the night, he made you breakfast before leaving while you were asleep, writing a note to let you know that he had to go to his part time job and that he’ll be busy for the upcoming week leading to the showcase.

The two of you haven’t seen each other since then, and you suppose it’s for the best. Every time you text him, let alone think of him, the itchy feeling of the petals climbing up your throat appears. 

Your thoughts are cut short when you hear your apartment door open, and you let out a groan when Jun suddenly appears in your bedroom doorway, holding the spare key you gave Minghao in his hand. The brunette frowns at your reaction to his appearance, “You’ve been avoiding Minghao.” 

“No. We’ve both been busy—”

“Even when Minghao’s busy with the team, and even when you’re busy with work, you still make the time to visit him at the studio. What’s wrong, yn?” You bite your bottom lip, turning over so that your back is facing Jun. He lets out a sigh, walking over to your side so that he can sit down on the bed, only to pause when he sees your garbage full of the beautiful petals. 

You hear Jun’s breath hitch, and you squeeze your eyes shut, realizing what he must’ve seen. You feel Jun’s hand rest on your shoulder, and suddenly you’re being moved onto your back, staring up into his frantic eyes as he searches your face. 

“No.” Jun mutters, voice quivering when you give him a pained smile. The two of you stare at each other for a moment longer, and he watches as a tear escapes your left eye.

“Is it…” Jun trails off when you nod your head, reaching your hands up and wiping away the wetness on your cheeks. You give him a tight smile, “It’s Mingh—” 

Jun’s eyes widen when you suddenly gag, watching as you get up from your bed and run straight to your bathroom. The brunette quickly follows after you, and he feels his heart break within his chest when he sees the pink petals fall from your mouth into the toilet, tears escaping your eyes as they do so. 

He kneels down beside you, patting your back until you finally throw up all the petals. You let out a groan, sitting back against the bathtub as Jun wipes away the bile around your mouth with a wet towel. 

“Please don’t tell him.” You mumble when Jun pushes away the baby hairs around your face. His eyes flit up to yours, and his lips form into a thin line, before he starts patting your forehead with the cool towel. 

“Junhui please—”

“I won’t tell Minghao.” Jun states, and you let out a breath of relief. A heavy silence settles upon the two of you afterwards, the looming thought that there’s only two cures to this disease hovering over you both. 

“You know what you have to do, right yn?” 

You don’t respond to his question, choosing to instead stare down at your fiddling hands. Jun turns to look at you, a serious look on his face as he nudges your shoulder for you to answer. Biting the inside of your cheek, you finally glance back at him, finding him to be blurry as tears flood your eyes. 

“Don’t give up your life for him, yn.” Jun tells you softly, and you shake your head at him. You hear him let out an exasperated sigh, but you just shake your head even more. 

“You know what will happen if I get the surgery, Jun. I won’t ever be able to love him, not even as my best friend. I can even end up hating him.” You say, and the brunette nods. He looks up towards your ceiling, knowing very well of the consequences that come with choosing your life over Minghao. 

“Hao may be my best friend, but I’m not going to let you give up your life for the sake of him.” You just stare at Jun as the tears fall past your eyes again, and he gives you a sad smile. He reaches out and pats your head fondly, before standing up from your bathroom floor. 

“I need to go to practice, but please. Live for yourself, yn.” And with that, Jun walks out of your bathroom. The sound of your apartment door closing resonates through your small apartment, and it’s the only thing that gets you to stand up from the tiled floor. 

You walk back to your bedroom, seeing your phone lit up on your dresser. Picking up the cool metal, you tap the email notification, only for your eyes to widen when you realize—

It’s W Magazine. 

They want to schedule an interview with you.

Your phone falls from your shaky hands and lands on the bed as you turn to stare at your reflection in the mirror, heart beating rapidly against your chest. 

The exhaustion is evident on your features, from your prominent bags, to the sag of your shoulders. However, there’s a glint of excitement in your eyes from the fact that you’re a step closer to your dream. 

Your gaze slowly trails over to your garbage can behind you, the bloody flowers laying in the bin staring back at you. 

“Live for yourself, yn.” 

You reach out for your phone and go to your contacts, scrolling all the way to the bottom before placing it up to your ear. You let out a shaky breath when you hear the person on the other end pick up the phone, before looking back towards yourself in the mirror.

“Hello, I’d like to schedule an appointment.”

“Everything looks good for the showcase tomorrow.” Jun says from beside Minghao, watching as Soonyoung and Chan perform their duet on the stage. The black haired beauty nods his head, glancing down at his phone to see if you responded to his message. 

A grin takes over his features when he sees your notification and unlocks his phone, chuckling when he sees the string of curses you sent for missing the pocket in the 8ball game the two of you were playing. Jun carefully watches Minghao’s expressions as he texts you, very aware of the fond smile on his best friend’s face. 

Jun looks away, attempting to focus on Soonyoung and Chan’s rehearsal instead of wondering how Minghao doesn’t love you back. It’s ridiculous to him when he thinks of how much Minghao truly cares for you, or the warm look in his eyes whenever he stares at you. 

Jun just doesn’t understand how Minghao couldn’t have fallen in love with you.

“Are you gonna see yn before the showcase? This is the longest the two of you haven’t seen each other.” Jun asks, and he watches as Minghao purses his lips in thought. The black haired beauty shakes his head after a moment, giving Jun a grin as he says, “I’ll see yn tomorrow at the showcase. I’ll still be pretty busy for a few more hours after this just to double check that everything is good to go anyways.” 

Jun nods his head slowly, looking back towards the stage when the music ends, signaling that Soonyoung and Chan’s duet is over. The two wave their hands over at Jun and Minghao, calling them to come up so they can rehearse their choreography. 

Minghao nudges Jun’s shoulder, “Let’s go practice.” 

Jun watches as your best friend walks over to the stage, laughing brightly at something Soonyoung said. The brunette bites his bottom lip, opening up his phone to read your last message to him. 

yn: i’m getting the surgery tomorrow

please take care of minghao for me

He lets out a breath and slips his phone back into his pocket, before looking up when he hears the call of his name. He locks eyes with Minghao, who’s smiling happily and waving him over along with Chan and Soonyoung. 

“Come on!” 

Jun sends them a tight smile, before heading over to the stage, heart heavy with the knowledge that Minghao’s happiness will soon dwindle.

You lay on your bed, the itch in your throat feeling more annoying today than it has the previous days.  The glow in the dark stars on your ceiling capture your attention, and you feel your eyes watering at the sight of them.

You used to find comfort in the small stars, the memory of you and Minghao sticking them onto the ceiling when you first moved in being one that brought you content. Now all you feel is heartbreak from the knowledge that you’ll no longer feel warm at the thought of him. 

You’re startled by the sound of your phone vibrating beside you, and you lift up the device, seeing that Minghao’s calling you. Biting your bottom lip, you wonder if it would be a good idea to answer. 

You vomit and cough up flowers when you think of Minghao, how much worse can it be when you actually hear his voice? 

But this is the last time you’ll be able to hear his voice and feel like you’re home.

And so, you answer the call. Placing your phone to your ear you say, “Minghao?” 

“Yn.”

“Why are you calling me at 2 in the morning?” You ask with a small smile on your face, ignoring the feeling of petals beginning to crawl up your lungs. Minghao rolls his eyes, rolling over onto his back in his own bed. “Do I need an excuse to call my best friend?” 

“No, but it’s 2 in the morning so I feel like I should ask.” You say with a giggle, and Minghao smiles at the sound. He lets out a sigh, looking out towards his window and seeing the stars shining brightly in the sky. 

“I just wanted to tell you that I miss you and that I’m excited to see you tomorrow.” Minghao tells you in a softer voice, and you feel your heart stutter within your chest. Your eyes begin to water as you roll over in bed, now laying on your side. 

“I miss you too.” You mumble, and the black haired beauty grins at that. You hear him let out a yawn on the other end, “I need to sleep since I’m waking up early tomorrow.” 

You nod your head even though he can’t see it, muttering how he should definitely be asleep right now. Blinking your eyes, you feel a tear escape and slide down your face until it lands on your pillow. 

“Night night, Minghao.” You say, and Minghao smiles softly. 

“Sweet dreams, yn.” 

As soon as you end the call, the petals come rushing up, and you sprint to your bathroom, a painful reminder that Minghao doesn’t love you. 

And by tomorrow night, you won’t love him either.

Jun watches from across the room as Minghao does his eye makeup for the showcase, the sound of the audience talking in excitement being heard from upstairs. He glances down at his phone, opening up his conversation with you to send you a text.

jun: does minghao know? 

Your phone vibrates beside you on the bed as you wait for your surgeon to enter the room. You reach out and grab it, raising it up to your face and seeing Jun’s message. Letting out a breath, you quickly type your response and press send, placing the device back onto the bed. 

you: no

Jun just stares at your answer, and he closes his eyes tightly, already awaiting the impending doom that’s about to fall upon you and Minghao. His eyes snap open when he feels a hand rest on his shoulder, and he looks up to see the black haired beauty staring down at him with a grin.

“You nervous?” Minghao asks, and Jun shrugs his shoulders as he leans back into the chair. He turns off his phone, placing it down onto the table as he purses his lips. 

He’s nervous, but not for the showcase. 

“A bit, just the usual pre-show jitters, ya know?” Minghao nods his head in agreement, understanding exactly what Jun means. He lets out a sigh, before looking over towards the door when the sound of a knock resonates through the room. Soonyoung and Chan’s heads pop through the opening, big smiles on their faces, signaling that it’s time for them to go on.

“It’s time already?” Minghao asks with a grin, walking over to the door with Jun by his side. Soonyoung nods, clapping his hands excitedly as he’s always been one to not be very nervous before their showcases. “Yup. It’s a few more minutes until the opening performance.” 

The four walk towards the main stage, listening to Soonyoung and Chan ramble about how much they’ve missed the feeling of performing. However, Jun’s mind is elsewhere as they enter the stage, unable to respond to his other teammates as he worries for what’s to come. 

“Are you excited to see your biggest fan?” Chan teasingly asks Minghao as they get into position, and the black haired beauty smiles warmly at the thought of you. He nods his head, looking at the curtain as if he can see right through it. “Always.” 

Jun looks down at the floor at the fondness dripping from Minghao’s voice as he steps over and goes into position, avoiding eye contact with any of the three guys as he does so. The voice of the MC is heard from beyond the curtain as they say the welcome speech, and Soonyoung looks over at Minghao with a grin.

“Are you ready, Minghao?” 

You slowly lower the phone from your ear, ending the call right as your surgeon walks into your hospital room. You look up towards him and see the pitiful smile on his face, a tragic reminder of what you’re here for.

“Are you ready, yn?” 

Minghao smiles at the blonde, before looking back towards the front as the curtains open. 

You let out a shaky breath, glancing down towards your fiddling hands as you nod your head. 

The both of you mutter, “Ready as I’ll ever be.” 

“You guys did great!” 

“Good job as always, Minghao!” 

The black haired beauty smiles and nods his head at those who came to watch them perform, thanking them for coming. However, his eyes continue to sweep through the crowd, trying to find your warmth filled eyes. 

You always sit in the front row so that Minghao will see you when he performs, and you’re always the first one to run and hug him whenever the showcase ends, giving him a large bouquet of flowers.

But you weren’t in the front row, and you weren’t the first one to congratulate him today.

Minghao excuses himself from the conversation as he walks over to Soonyoung and Jun, a frown etched across his features as he wonders where you could possibly be. Jun looks over right as Minghao steps over to them, and he feels his heart sink at the lost expression on the latter’s face.

“Have you guys seen yn?” Minghao asks, and the two shake their heads, no. The black haired beauty bites his bottom lip, turning to look over at the crowd again to see if you just got caught up talking to someone. Soonyoung purses his lips, “Why don’t you call them?”

Minghao lets out a breath, realizing that was the first thing he should’ve done in the first place. He quickly thanks Soonyoung and walks backstage to grab his phone. As he heads towards the dressing room, he can only wonder whether you possibly got stuck in traffic or if something came up.

He pushes open the door and walks over to his bag, pulling out his phone and unlocking it to see that you left a voicemail. Raising an eyebrow, Minghao presses play and puts the cool metal to his ear.

“Hi, Minghao.” You say softly, willing for your voice not to shake as you look out the window of your hospital room. “I’m sorry I couldn’t make it to your showcase, but I know that you did great. You always do.” 

Minghao frowns, looking over towards the doorway when he hears the door open, only to find Jun standing there. 

“You… you always filled me with so much warmth.” You begin, feeling tears slowly flood your eyes as you cast your eyes downward towards your blanket. “I’m so thankful to have had you in my life for so long, and I’m so sorry for not telling you.” 

Minghao’s frown deepens at your words, wondering what you’ve been keeping a secret. 

You let out a shaky breath, tears falling from your eyes as you look up towards the ceiling. “I’m in love with you, Minghao.”

Minghao’s heart drops into his stomach at your words, suddenly realizing what’s happening. He turns towards Jun, seeing the remorseful expression on his face as he watches him.

“I don’t know when these feelings began but I always knew that I cared for you so much more than I should’ve.” You clutch the thin hospital blanket in your hand, biting your bottom lip harshly to try and speak clearly for Minghao to hear every word you’re saying. “I was originally going to let the disease run its course because I never want to forget the feeling of loving you and the warmth you brought me.” 

You raise your hand up and wipe away the tears falling from your eyes, “But I decided to get the surgery, so that’s why I couldn’t make it to your showcase today.” 

Minghao’s eyes widen, and he quickly grabs his bag, throwing everything inside. Jun walks over, resting a hand on Minghao’s shoulder to try and talk to him, only for the latter to shrug his hand off as he listens to your words.

“I’ll always be grateful that you were my first love.” 

Minghao throws the bag over his shoulder and runs out of the dressing room, tears falling from his eyes as he ignores Jun’s shouts from behind him.

“I’m so sorry that I’ll no longer be able to give you that love, and I know that I’ll always regret losing you, but I have to do this.” 

Minghao sprints down the hallway, shoving open the door and being hit with a wave of the warm summer air. He frantically looks around, breathing heavily as he starts running in the direction of the hospital, hearing your last words to him through his phone.

“I want to live, Minghao.”

“You just need to stay here overnight to make sure there were no complications in your surgery, but everything went smoothly.” Dr. Jung tells you, and you nod your head as the nurse helps you sit up on the bed. The sound of your beating heart is heard in your ears, and you raise your hand up, resting it on your chest as you feel it beat against your hand. 

You’re alive.

The sound of running feet is heard down the hallway, and you pause when you hear it come to a stop. Feeling a pair of eyes on you, you look over towards the door, only to lock eyes with the familiar pair that always held warmth in them when they saw you. 

You see none of the warmth as he stares at you, instead finding an indecipherable emotion to them. His eyes searching yours to find the answer to the question he doesn’t dare to ask. 

You have no doubt that yours once held a familiar weight to them as his do right now. 

“Yn—” 

You turn away from him, effectively answering the question he was about to ask. Minghao’s heart falls in his chest when you give your surgeon a tight smile as the man exits the room along with the nurse, giving the black haired beauty a pitiful look. 

“Yn.” Minghao says as he walks over to your hospital bed, standing before you as you look out the window. “Yn, please.”

“It’s not your fault.” You mutter quietly, and he pauses. You slowly turn your head to look up at him, giving him a small smile that holds no affection, no love. “Don’t blame yourself for what I had to do.”

“Why,” Minghao looks down at the floor, trying to bring his breathing back to normal as he musters up the courage to continue. “Why didn’t you tell me?” 

You stare at the man you once loved. His black hair is styled to reveal his forehead, eyeliner adorning his eyes along with dark eyeshadow. Before, your heart would’ve been racing as you stared at the pretty man in front of you. However, you feel none of the warmth that you used to as he looks back up towards you. 

You give him a close-lipped smile, “Because I loved you, Minghao.” 

He bites his bottom lip, looking down at his feet in defeat as the tears begin to fall from his eyes. Raising his hands up to his face, he wonders if this is all just a nightmare. That you never got hanahaki, that you never got the surgery…

That you still love him. 

“Minghao! Yn!” The two of you turn towards the door, finding Jun, Soonyoung, and Chan standing there, chests rising and falling as they try to catch their breath. You let out a fond smile when you see your friends, but they just stare between you and Minghao with conflicting expressions on their faces. 

“Yn, are you okay?” Soonyoung asks, walking up to your bedside along with Chan while Jun just stares at Minghao, feeling guilty at the heartbroken expression that adorns Minghao’s features. 

You nod your head at the blonde, “I’m feeling okay, don’t worry. Sorry I couldn’t make it today.” 

Soonyoung just gives you a tight smile, reaching out and patting your hand as he turns back to look towards Minghao. The black haired beauty just stands there, staring at the floor with pain stricken eyes and slumped shoulders. 

“I think we should take Minghao back to his apartment.” Chan says, and you nod your head in understanding. Your eyes trail over towards the pretty man, and Jun sees no emotion in your gaze as you stare at Minghao. You look up towards Jun, catching his eye as you send him a small smile. “I’ll see you guys later.” 

“We’ll come visit with food later.” Soonyoung tells you, and you grin. You raise your hand up and wave towards the four, and the three of them return the gesture. Minghao just turns to look at you for a moment, heartbreak evident in his eyes as his eyes look over your features, as if to remember. 

Minghao clenches his fist at his side, before turning and walking out of the room without another word. Jun quickly follows after him in panic after waving at you one more time, and you just let out a breath as Soonyoung and Chan go after them.

“Minghao!” Jun calls out, following Minghao all the way out the hospital. The brunette rests a hand over his chest, trying to even out his breathing as he speeds up to reach out towards his heartbroken best friend.

“MINGHAO!” Jun yells, finally grabbing the latter’s arm, causing the two of them to stop and catch their breaths on the sidewalk. Minghao raises his hands up to his hair, gripping on the strands as multiple emotions flood through him. 

“Why are you so devastated? They’re alive, Minghao. Isn’t that what matters?” Jun asks, looking at Minghao with a furrow to his brow as the black haired beauty looks around with frantic eyes. Jun grabs Minghao’s other arm and shakes the man, “Minghao!” 

“I don’t know!” Minghao exclaims as he finally faces Jun, tears running down his face as he stares at him. He bites his bottom lip, swallowing the lump in his throat as numerous questions flow through his mind. 

Minghao’s always been the more composed between the two of them, with everyone agreeing that he’s quite mature. However, as Jun stares at his friend before him, he no longer sees the collected Minghao that he’s grown to know over the years. 

“I don’t know what I’m feeling! I-I can’t begin to explain how much it hurts.” Minghao says, resting a hand over his heart as he feels a sob bubble up in his chest. Jun kneels down in worry as Minghao doubles over, sobs wracking his body as he raises his hands to cover his face.

“Minghao, let’s take you back to your apartment. We can talk there.” Jun tells him, and Minghao doesn’t respond, continuing to sob into his hands.

“Minghao, please—Minghao?!” Jun’s eyes widen with worry when Minghao abruptly pulls away, nausea apparent on his features as he steps back into the wall of the building. The black haired beauty turns around into the alley and doubles over as he vomits. 

Jun takes a step forward to pat Minghao’s back as a means to comfort him, only for his mouth to drop open in horror at the sight that lays before him. 

Pink peony petals are scattered across the pavement, blood splattered onto them as they begin to fly down the alley with the wind. 

Minghao breathes heavily at all the flower petals surrounding him, cheeks wet from the tears that fell from his eyes. His knees buckle and he falls onto the pavement, hands resting on top of the pile of pink flowers that escaped his system.

Jun sucks in a shaky breath, “Hao—”

“Don’t.” Minghao breathes, and Jun closes his mouth. 

Minghao slowly lifts up the blood splattered peony petals in his hands, feeling his bottom lip tremble from the memory of that beautiful day. Silence falls over the two of them as they stare at the cursed flowers that have brought so much heartbreak.

As a single tear falls from Minghao’s eye, he’s left wondering when his fate became so twisted.

one year later

You walk down the sidewalk, breathing in the warm, summer air as you do so. Shoving your hands into your pockets, you gaze around at your surroundings as you head to the event, only to stop when you lay eyes on the flower shop.

It’s been a year since you’ve gotten the surgery, and life’s been going well for you. You went to the interview at W Magazine and were hired a couple weeks later. You’re still far from your goal, but you’ve taken a step, and that’s more than enough. 

You and Minghao never spoke after he left your hospital room.

You’ve kept in contact with Jun, Soonyoung and Chan, as they were also your best friends. However, you know in your heart that it’s not the same. A bit of distance has grown between the four of you, but the love is still there.

Love. 

You think love is a crooked concept.

You let out a breath as you stare at the pink peony flowers, the memories flooding back into the forefront of your mind. You reach out and take a single peony, twisting the flower in your fingers as Minghao’s words play in your head.

“A pretty flower for my flower.” 

“Minghao!” The newly dyed blonde turns his head in the direction where he heard his name be called, only to let out a laugh when Jun, Soonyoung and Chan engulf him in a group hug. 

The sounds of the cheers from behind the curtain are still loud as the showcase has just ended, and it fills Minghao with the feeling of accomplishment as he excitedly converses with his friends.

It’s been a year since Minghao found out that you had hanahaki, and it’s been less than a year since Minghao got the surgery to remove the roots of the flower from his own lungs. 

You never learned that Minghao loved you.

“Let’s go and thank those who came so that we can go out for celebratory bbq.” Jun says with a happy smile, watching as Soonyoung and Chan nod their heads in agreement. The two begin to discuss the amount of food they’re going to order as they walk off the stage, but Jun stays back, staring at Minghao who seems to be deep in thought.

“Hao.” The blonde looks up towards Jun and he lets out a friendly grin. “Sorry, I was thinking of something.” 

“Thinking of what?” Jun asks, and Minghao simply shrugs his shoulders. 

“Nothing important anymore.” 

Minghao chuckles at Soonyoung and Chan beginning to bicker as they head towards Jun’s car, only for the blonde to pause when he reaches into his pocket to find nothing. Jun raises an eyebrow at Minghao’s concerned expression, “Did you forget something?” 

The blonde lets out an apologetic smile as he nods his head, already turning to head back into the auditorium, “I just forgot my airpods, I’ll be right back!” 

“Hurry or else we’ll leave you!” Chan calls out after him, and Minghao sends him a disappointed thumbs down as he begins to run back inside.  

Pushing open the doors, he smiles and bows towards the rest of the staff that are still in the building. He heads towards the dressing room and opens the door, letting out a breath of relief when he sees his airpods case sitting on the table. 

“Good thing no one took them.” Minghao mutters to himself as he walks over and grabs them. His eyes look up towards the mirror, only to pause when he sees what rests on the couch behind him. Slowly, he turns around and lays eyes on the bouquet of flowers. 

The familiar pink peonies are wrapped beautifully in brown paper, and there’s a single white peony in the middle of the arrangement, a stark contrast to the soft pink of the other peonies surrounding it.

Minghao bites his bottom lip and walks over towards the bouquet, seeing the envelope resting over the flowers. He reaches out and picks up the envelope, opening it up and taking out the card, only for a shaky breath to leave him when he reads the message.

you did well.

- ❀

You look up towards the sky as you walk to the bus stop, watching as the clouds move across the horizon. You wonder what it would be like to be able to touch the clouds, to grasp them in your hands.

The vibration of your phone cuts you off from your thoughts, and you pull it out of your pocket. Your heart stutters when you lay eyes on the notification, and you immediately unlock your phone, opening up the message.

minghao: thank you, my flower.

You let out a quiet laugh at the nickname, feeling something akin to warmth flood your system as you pocket your phone.

The feeling is foreign to you now, having been unfamiliar for over a year. It may not be the same, but it’s the closest you feel you’re ever going to get.

Tears suddenly fall past your eyes as you look up towards the pink clouds, and you wipe them away with the back of your hand. A sigh leaves your lips as you lower your head, now looking down at the sidewalk as your vision blurs from the tears flooding your eyes.

As you begin to walk towards the bus stop again, you’re left wondering why you’re even crying in the first place.

In China, peony is a traditional flower symbol and is called 牡丹 (mǔdān) which means “the most beautiful.” 

[uncloseted]

What are some effective waya to become more productive?

what are some effective ways 2 be productive?

First things first, figure out what the problem actually is. Why are you struggling to be productive? Is it because you're a perfectionist and the idea of not doing the task perfectly stresses you out? Is it because you're lacking the motivation to do anything? Is it because you're struggling to concentrate, or because you're overwhelmed by the task, or because you don't know where to begin? There are tons of reasons why you might be struggling with productivity, and figuring out what the roadblocks you're encountering are can help you to find ways around them. Since I can't read your mind, I'm going to try and give advice that will work for most of the roadblocks you might encounter.

When it comes to big things, I recommend using the SMARTER & WOOP methods. SMARTER and WOOP are two tools that are really useful for behavior modification and other long-term goals you might have.

SMART(ER) is a tool to help you set the right goals for you.  Too often, we set goals like “I’m going to start exercising” or “I’m going to quit going on my phone”.  Those are great in theory, but without an action plan, it’s easy to not follow through.

SMARTER goals are ones that are:

Specific (simple, sensible, significant).

If your goal isn’t specific, you won’t be able to focus your efforts or feel motivated to achieve it.

Try to answer: what do I want to accomplish? Why is this goal important? Who is involved? Where is it located? Which resources or limits are involved?

Measurable (meaningful, motivating).

Having measurable goals is important because it allows you to track your progress and stay motivated by seeing how far you’ve come.

A measurable goal should be one that answers “how much”, “how many” and “how will I know when it’s accomplished”?

Achievable (agreed, attainable).

Your goal needs to be realistic in order for you to stay motivated and be successful.  If you’re aiming too high, you’ll become demotivated quickly because it doesn’t feel like you’re making progress.

An achievable goal requires you to ask “how can I accomplish this goal” and “how realistic is this goal based on other constraints?”

Relevant (reasonable, realistic and resourced, results-based).

Relevant goals are ones that matter to you.  Make sure that these goals are ones that are important to you, not ones that you think you should be pursuing.

A relevant goal is one that can answer “yes” to the following questions: “does this seem worthwhile?”, “is this the right time?”, “does this match my other efforts/needs?”, “is it applicable in my current socio-economic environment?”

Time bound (time-based, time limited, time/cost limited, timely, time-sensitive).

Every goal needs a target date so that you have a deadline you can focus on and work toward.

A time sensitive goal is one that answers “when?”, “what can I do six months from now?”, “what can I do six weeks from now?”, and “what can I do today?”

Evaluate

Every day, evaluate how you’re doing on your goals.  Long term goals can be easily ignored if they’re not evaluated every day, and if you don’t evaluate how you’re doing on your goals regularly, you might miss the things that are preventing you from achieving them.

Readjust

If you find that your approach isn’t working, you may need to readjust your goals.  That doesn’t mean that you’re failing at your goals or that you should quit; it just means you have to rethink the approach you’re taking.  Maybe the goal isn’t as relevant to you as you thought it would be, or it’s not as realistic as you expected, or your timeline is too short.  Identify which part of your SMARTER goal is tripping you up and readjust it.

The best goals are ones that include trying new things instead of quitting old ones.  Quitting things is hard; learning something new is easier and more exciting.  If you’re looking to quit something, replace it by establishing a new habit that takes its place.  For example, “I’m going to stop going on my phone,” is hard, but “when I feel like going on my phone, I’ll read a book for ten minutes instead” might be easier to maintain.

After you’ve figured out your SMARTER goal, it’s time to WOOP.  WOOP is something like the scientifically proven cousin of “manifesting”.  Just visualizing our goals or positive thinking on its own can be counterproductive, because it fools our lizard brains into believing that we’ve already achieved the goal.  By using the WOOP method, you can prevent that from happening and actually achieve what you want to achieve.

WOOP stands for:

Wish: Identify a wish that is challenging, yet attainable.  This should be your SMARTER goal.

Outcome: Imagine the best outcome as a result of your wish (as vividly as possible).  Really daydream about what your life would be like if you achieved your goal.

Ask yourself, what is the biggest benefit you could receive from achieving this goal?

Obstacle: Identify and imagine what obstacles will get in the way of your wish.

What might get in the way?  Thoughts, feelings, beliefs, old behavior patterns, bad habits, social pressure… identify as many as you can, then prioritize their likely they are to happen and how significant they would be if they did happen.

Plan: Create an if-then plan to overcome the obstacles you identified- “if [obstacle occurs] then I will [plan A].”  Do your best to pick the most effective path you can for each obstacle, and identify a few different plans in case your first plan doesn’t work.

For example, if you wanted to start exercising, your WOOP might look like this:

Wish: Go on a run 3x/week after school/work for a month.

Outcome: Better energy, confidence, and health.

Obstacle: Feeling tired and hungry at the end of the day…Not wanting to go.

Plan: Pack a snack for the end of the day, and put on gym clothes right when you get home.

Or if you wanted to stop watching TV and read more:

Wish: Watch only 5 episodes of TV per week, and read when I feel the urge to watch TV for a month.

Outcome: Learn a lot. Get smarter. Feel better. Enjoy the great ideas. Feel like I’m spending my time wisely.

Obstacle: Not feeling like it. Preferring to watch TV.

P: If I catch myself watching TV, then I turn it off and start reading a book instead.

The last thing you can do to increase the chances that you’ll achieve your goal is to get someone else involved.  Either find a friend who’s setting the same goal that you are, or tell someone about your goal and ask them to help you achieve it by checking up on you.  It can also be helpful to put money on the line- give money to a friend with the understanding that you’ll get it back on a set date if you’ve achieved your goal.  If you really want to ensure that you reach your goal, tell your friend that if you fail, they should donate the money to a group or cause that you really hate.

For smaller, more day to day tasks:

Make a list of everything you need to do. Sort them into four categories- tasks that are Urgent & Important, tasks that are Not Urgent & Important tasks that are Not Important but Urgent, and tasks that are neither Urgent nor Important. Focus first on the tasks that are Urgent & Important. This can help you prioritize which things to work on first.

From there, take a look at each individual task and break it down into very small steps that you can't fuck up. These can be as small as "open laptop", "open Google Docs", "write name at top of the page", etc. If it helps, you can assign each one of these steps a point count, and then give yourself a treat once you collect enough points (10 points, 20 points, 50 points, and so on).

Once you have your list and have identified all of the steps, just do the first step. It can be daunting to start a big project or task; it's way easier to just do one thing. And once you do one thing, it feels easier to do just one more thing, and just one more thing, and so on until the task is complete.

Once you build up some momentum, I would recommend using the Pomodoro technique. Work for 20-25 minutes (or as long as you can really focus) and then take a 5-10 minute break. Stand up, get a drink, get a snack, watch a short TV episode or a YouTube video, look up that thing that was on your mind, whatever will give your brain a break. Then, set another 20-25 minute timer and get back to work. After three or four cycles of working and taking a short break, take a longer break.

A few other things that I think it's important to remember when it comes to productivity.

Anything worth doing is worth doing badly. You don't need to finish things, and you don't need to do them perfectly. If it's a choice between doing something badly or not doing it at all, it's always better to do it badly.

You don't need to do things the way other people would do them- do it how it works for you. Sometimes that won't make sense to other people, but that's all right. The only person it has to work for is you. If bouncing back and forth between different tasks works better for you than focusing on one task until it's done, then bounce back and forth between tasks. That's okay.

It's okay to ask for help. If you have trouble doing things, that's okay- find someone who can assist you. Maybe you're bad at projects that don't have someone to be accountable to. Find a friend who will hold you accountable. Maybe you're bad at projects without deadlines. Set deadlines for yourself and get someone to make sure you meet them. Sometimes you don't need to work through your shortcomings- you just need to find a way around them.

[dreamrecorder]

Until then, we will find each other again. <||>

fluff & angst drabble, reincarnation au, modern au

| Xiao x Reader | Diluc x Reader |

Note: I'm sorry that I can't put the cut thingy bcos im writing in mobile. Once I get ahold of my laptop I'll put the cut thingy. Happy reading^^ i swear these were supposed to be short but welp

Xiao

Notes: Immortal companion* - Just think of someone immortal from the game. This is also a different take from Venti's and Zhongli's because I honestly think Xiao is so done with immortality and its consequences.

Suicide implicitly mentioned.**

Xiao is mourning for the passing of his immortal companion*, making him the last immortal to walk the world. Now, it is he, who last remains from a time of gods and monsters. Each passing of a mutual, he witnessed. They deemed it was their time to move on, for humanity has succeeded to bring fate into their own two hands. The world no longer needed them.

Xiao has already suffered loss way before the Archon War. Yet, he never expressed the emotion of grief for he needed to be strong lest the world will eat him alive. However, this passing made his heart of glass, chip a little, then shattering the whole thing altogether. Or perhaps, it was already chipped away and too fragile because of the losses that has culminated in his immortal life.

Now, he lays on the roof of a building of what used to be Wangshu Inn. He was trying hard not to break down again. By doing so, he merely cursed fate over and over again. Yet, to no avail, the man exploded in tears once more, too tired from all the pain and loss suffered from millenias.

Then... there's you. You who uttered the words, "Until then, we will find each other again."

With all sincerity he can muster, he wanted to believe those words. He wanted to believe in you. That's why he stayed. Yet... the pain he feels heavily overweighs his faith in you.

**

He just wants to... end it all.

"I just want to disappear..."

**

No one heard him utter those words, only the wind. And the wind- just as once the Anemo Archon had said, carries the words one thinks no one can hear.

It came like a whisper, yet loud and clear. Then all of a sudden, the memories of your previous life flashed before your eyes. You dropped the book you were holding and held your temples at the incoming migraine.

"Are you alright?" You friends asked in worry, looking for any visible signs of pain aside from your clenched eyes and your frowning expression.

You could only groan as a reply and your friends waited for you to take your time to recollect yourself.

Who... Whose voice? You knew this voice... But who?

You finally removed your hands and opened your eyes.

"I- I have to go... Go without me." Was all you said before leaving your friends in the dust who looked at your way with confusion.

Who? Many questions riddled your mind. And with all these unanswered, worry and anxiety grew in your heart. Tears began to swell in your eyes, worsening your headache.

This is not about you! You have to look for... something! Someone! Just-

"Dear gods, please please don't you dare fucking take him..."

You sprinted around the area, following and listening to that now faint whisper under the night. The whispers only became clearer and louder when you approached a building which used to be an inn.

The moment you stepped foot within the building, the lone whisper became mixed with more words which did not lift your heart.

Fuck.

With pure adrenaline, you opted to use the stairs instead of the damn elevator. You have finally reached the door leading to the rooftop, and at that point, the whispers became screams. However, when your hand grasped the handle, the voice in the wind stopped. You opened the door at full to be met by the back of the man who stands at the railing.

Xiao...?

Xiao..

Xiao.

"Xiao!"

At the call of his name by a familiar voice, his head whipped to its direction. But he shall not be fooled.

"You... you're not real."

The words along with lifeless eyes stabbed you.

"It's me, Xiao! Y/n! Don't do this! I'm sorry I took so long! But I'm here now! Just as I had promised!"

Your heart was beating against your ribcage. You had to prove you were real. But how?

"You're just an illusion made by my heart."

"Xiao, please! Fuck I'm really sorry! But please you don't have to do this... I... I remember everything, Xiao... All those times we battled in the war. Those times we shared almond tofu. The times we smiled, cried, laughed, and fought...

I remember everything..."

For each word you uttered, you grew confident in your memories. For each word, you took a step closer. For each word, you saw life coming back to the man you love.

"So please... Come back..."

At the final word, you released all your sincerity, genuity, and adoration for him. And finally, your hands took purchase in his (while trying so hard not to shed any tear for his sake).

"It's me."

...

"Y/n...?"

You beamed at him and finally, Xiao's eyes were now shining in clarity, and of course, life and love.

Diluc has been reincarnated many times, yet still has not found you. Through his reincarnated forms, he alternated between travelling and staying in Mondstadt. The former done in order to find you. The latter done in the chance you would find him there.

Diluc

For the first time in his many lifetimes, his current form surprised him. When he reached 'sixteen', his memories resurfaced and the realization sank in. His appearance ended just as how he looked in his first ever lifetime. The only difference was the length of his hair. He even ended up being reincarnated in the Ragnvindr Family along with inheriting the winery business.

To put it bluntly, walking within the old yet maintained Ragnvindr Mansion was a memory lane. However, the moment of reminiscence only gave him a heavy heart, for within these halls used to be filled with your laughter.

In this very same spot where he currently stands, is where you uttered your last words.

"Until then, we will find each other again."

Walking aimlessly around the mansion, he thinks about those long, long years without you. Must be fate so cruel? Making him search far and wide, when in the end fate does not want you to return to him? The man clenched his fists, and in anger, punched the nearby wall.

He expected a bursting kind of pain to come, yet what came was a dull throb on his knuckles. Yet this is not only what he had not expected. He did not expect for the wall to respond with a resounding hollowness.

A hidden corridor? Room? When had the family installed this?

Curiosity held him and began kicking the hollow wall without hesitation. What secrets does it hide from all these years, he shall know. Once the wall opened up for him to fit, he entered with a lit phone in hand at extreme brightness.

Again, what he saw, he had not expected. What he saw both filled and emptied his heart simultaneously. What he saw was a painting of you and him, together in a moment of shared happiness.

"Dilu-" His mother called which snapped out of his trance. His head snapped at her direction and saw her eyes fill with solemness.

"I didn't mean to-"

His mother hushed him with a gentle smile and entered the room to stand alongside him.

"You know," his mother began, "I always believed in the fantasy that had been once in our world. Lord Barbatos, the other Archons, the Twins that saved our world, Visions, and... reincarnation. I always believed in them.

The moment I saw your features when you were born, I knew you were the reincarnation of the Uncrowned King of Mondstadt... So I named you after him because I knew your memories would resurface someday. I knew the day would come when my son will no longer be my son. Because when that day comes, all I would see in your eyes is a long unspoken wisdom and pain that will replace your innocence free from battles and war."

Diluc was surprised, yet kept his emotions to himself. He understood what his mother was pointing at. "Is... Is this why this picture is hidden?"

His mother nodded solemnly. "Perhaps, I was afraid and scared about when the day I spoke of will take place. That's why I ordered this painting be hidden. I knew this painting of you and Lady Y/n will unlock your memories sooner, but I didn't want that."

For once in his lifetimes, his heart softened with love. The kind of love that assures you that someone cares for you. Never in his reincarnated lifetimes, had he experienced this feeling. All those years, he was just... lost in the feelings and thoughts of not being with you.

The man stepped towards his mother with hesitation to which he instantly erased. He hugged his mother with a soft spoken voice saying these words.

"I will always be your son and you will always be my mother. That will never change. I may be 'older' than you, but please do remember that I would not have grown to who am I today without your guidance. For that, I deeply thank you for taking care of me...

I love you, Mom."

With his words, his mother burst into light tears accompanied by a smile. "Don't make me cry, I'm going to wrinkle." Diluc laughed at the comment. After a loving moment, the two separated yet his mother still held onto his arms.

"You've grown so much... I guess little birds do leave the nest someday."

"It wouldn't be possible without you."

His mother looked at him with a proud gaze, "Go. Find her. If memory serves right, I might have seen someone like her dwell everyday in the local library."

The man released his breath he never knew he was holding. Diluc hugged his mom again with a peck on her cheek. He then let go and began to exit the room with haste.

"Once I come home, I will tell you everything. Venti, Morax, the Twin Travelers, the Archons, and Visions. I will tell you everything."

With a rush, Diluc was now out of sight. Yet, the Madam Ragnvindr was not saddened. Her heart swelled for her son whose eyes are finally, once more lit with happiness. However, who's Venti?

A/n: welp truth be told diluc's story took an unexpected turn lol. It's either I'm going to leave this like that or continue it. Take your pick by commenting because I'm actually fine with either options haha happy reading <3

[strawberrywritings]

Pastello Bianco

A/N: Found this song and thought: why not? I kind of want to do a series (if you can call it that) based on Pinguini Tattici Nuceari’s songs because I’ve been listeniing to them non-stop and they’re genius! But I do not guarantee. Also, yes, hi, it’s me again, coming on here to post something nobody asked for. You can find the song here and the full English translation here. Hope you enjoy it!🍓❤

Warnings: sad times + I haven’t written in months

/ Masterlist / masterlist 2

E se m'hai visto piangere (If you saw me crying) Sappi che era un'illusione ottica (Just know that it was only an optical illusion) Stavo solo togliendo il mare dai miei occhi (I was just getting the sea out of my eyes)

Your brows knitted in confusion once you spotted Angel hunched over the bed, his back to the door, where you currently stood. You’d never seen him cry, was he crying? Yeah, you were almost sure he was. You could hear quiet sniffles.

Knocking on the door, you made your presence known, a small smile at your lips, ready to comfort him. He turned his head towards you, looking over his shoulders to see you standing at the door of his room. He turned back around, looking straight ahead and trying to compose himself, not wanting you to know that he was, in fact, crying. Wiping the few tears that were just below his lower lash line, he put on a brave face, the face that always made him look so sure of himself, he had mastered it over the years.

He got up and walked over to where you were standing, giving you a hug and a kiss on the forehead, as you let him envelope your body in his, grateful for the heat his body brought to yours, feeling calm, letting out a breath when his fingers sneaked below your shirt, making contact with the skin of your waist.

“How was your day?”, he asked, not moving from the position, keeping his cheek pressed to your head, the smell of your hair filling his nostrils and making him more at ease. “Good – you answered, your hands moving soothingly up and down his back – how ‘bout you? You okay?”, you murmured, kissing his cheek and moving your head so you could look him in the eyes.

Mi chiedi come sto e non te lo dirò (You ask me how I'm doing but I won't tell you)

“Yeah, I’m good”, he mumbled, keeping you tight against him. The way he was breathing and the sound of his voice gave him away, though, but if you noticed, which you had, you didn’t point it out: if he didn’t say what was bothering him, it meant that he didn’t want to share it and you were fine with it. He knew he could come to you if he needed help. Instead, he kept to himself, like he always did, but there was only so much he could take… it got to a point he felt like he was about to explode, and yet he didn’t let anything show, opting to cry in the shower or when sleeping alone in his bed. You already had too much on your plate, he didn’t have to add his problems. It wasn’t fair to you.

I tuoi segreti poi a chi li racconterai (So who are you going to tell your secrets to?) Tu che rimani sempre la mia password del Wi-Fi (You're still my Wi-Fi password) E chi sa se lo sai (And maybe you don't even know it)

After your breakup, he tried to set a routine that would help him not to think about you. He worked at the scrapyard, he went on rides, he went to parties, he started working out more, he was doing everything in his power to avoid letting his brain run free, trying to occupy it with other thoughts in order to keep you out of his head. The only reason he noticed that your name was still the password to his wi-fi was because the new prospect asked if he could connect his laptop to the wi-fi. And your name sounded bitter in his mouth, he said it like he almost didn’t want to pronounce it, and saying it out loud brought back all the memories that he had kept stashed in the back of his mind, he hadn’t forgotten the pain in your eyes when you parted ways, or the sound of your voice when you said goodbye for the last time.

E scrivevo tutti i miei segreti (And I used to write down all my secrets) Col pastello bianco sul diario (With a white crayon in my diary) Speravo che venissi a colorarli (Hoping you would come and color them in)

Perché un addio suona troppo serio (Goodbye sounds too serious) E allora ti dirò bye bye (So I'll just tell you "bye bye")

You approached his house with a bag in hand, full of the things that Angel had left at your apartment, and you had come to retrieve the things you had left at his place. The exchange was almost silent, you greeted each other, avoiding saying anything that could ruin the moment, no empty words or empty promises, nothing more than what was necessary. When you were done collecting your things, he was in his living room, inspecting the stuff that you had brought back almost as if he didn’t recognize his own possessions. You stood in front of the door for a few seconds, before gaining his attention by announcing that you were leaving. He came to open the door for you and watched as you put your stuff in the car, climbing in and turning the engine on. If you had to speak again, you’d have burst into tears, so you opted for a small wave, trying to control your breathing and not cry in front of him. He didn’t say goodbye, that word sounded bad, and heavy, and emotional, and he really couldn’t bring himself to even look you in the eyes as you drove away from his house. When the noise of your car was replaced by silence again, he let out a shaky breath and went back inside, having to face the memories that were encased in the bag you had returned to him.

E ti auguro il meglio, i cieli stellati, le notti migliori e le docce di altri (I wish you all the best, starry skies, the best of nights, and someone else's shower)

Dove tu forse non stonerai più (where maybe you won't be so out of tune)

While getting the shower ready after his workout, he put a random playlist on, and the sound bounced off the walls as he turned the volume higher. You liked to blame your off-key singing o the acoustics of his bathroom and he just liked poking your sides, making a funny remark about how you should audition for X-factor, then. He hoped you’d find a bathroom where your voice didn’t sound as bad as it did in his, and he hoped you’d be happy, even if it wasn’t going to be on the back of his truck while stargazing. He hoped you’d be happy, even if it wasn’t with him.

taglist: (it’s the usual one, tell me if you wanna be added or removed❣) @sesamepancakes @i-love-scott-mccall @mayans-sauce @starrynite7114 @scuzmunkie @angelreyesgirl @my-rosegold-soul @deeandbobbymcgee @chibsytelford @rebelwrites @littleesilvia @woahitslucyylu @sadeyesgf @elcococruz @cocotheclown @sheeshgivemeabreak @blessedboo @brattyfics @thesandbeneathmytoes @enamoured-x @enamouravecleslivresetlechocolat @blackmissfrizzle @thickemadame @peaches007 @ly-canthrope @justahopelessssromantic @everyhowlmarksthedead @samcrobae @cind-in-real-life @mrsjaxtellerfan @gemini0410 @brownsugarcoffy @losolvidad0s @marvelmaree @noz4a2 @-im-fantastic- @destynelseclipsa @danie1432 @krysiewithak @ellieereads @wrcn9fvlcver @buttercup812

[vixenpen]

Fuck A Fan (Bakugo x Camgirl reader pt. 1)

You had gotten the idea from one of your best friends in the cam industry.

“You sure this will work?”

“Trust me boo,” he had replied, “sometimes the best motivation for a man is a little friendly competition.”

Your bestie had insisted that a fuck a fan contest would be the perfect way to get CallMeKing to finally make good on his unfulfilled promise to see you.

Putting the finishing touches on your flyer, you finally posted the announcement to all social media. You knew CMK was still lurking. So he’d definitely see it. Hopefully, this little contest would be enough to spark his interest, if this failed, you were going to scream.

Because for the first time in your cam career, a man had you chasing him.

The audacity!

To be fair, he did say that he wanted to see you too, but had to keep a low profile due to his career. He promised as soon as worked dialed down you guys would meet up.

Well that had been over a year ago, and not only had you guys not met face to face; he also didn’t seem to check in on you as much anymore.

He still tipped and re-subbed to your page. He had even cash-apped you money for Christmas and your birthday.

But aside from that, there were no more late night, sexting sessions, no more random check ins, no more nude trading.

At first, you brushed it off.

He was apparently a very successful man. Successful men were busy. They couldn’t give you every second of their time. As a successful woman, you could relate to that.

Not to mention, you were a bad bitch and bad bitches did not pine over any man.

PERIODTTT.

Buuuut...when the man in question was fine as hell with boulders for biceps, a big dick, and long money, well...you’d like to think the City Girls, Meg the Stallion, and all the other bad bitches you looked up to would understand your thirst.

“Alright, King,” you sat back in the furry, white computer chair and glared at your laptop screen. “Ball is in your court now.”

“Mr. Ground Zero, can I get a picture too?”

A precocious looking blue haired kid asked. He stared up at Katsuki with wide, hopeful eyes.

Katsuki grimaced.

“Whatever kid, c’mon.”

He leaned down, attempting to keep a safe distance from the walking germ pool, while keeping in the lens of his camera phone.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Thanks a lot, Mr. Ground Zero!”

The kid giddily ran back to his group of friends.

Kirishima slung his arm around Bakugo’s shoulder, weighing down on his slightly shorter friend.

“Wow, Bakubro, looks like those public relations training classes have really been working, huh?”

“Whatever, I just don’t need anymore shitty press with kids.”

“You still have energy for happy hour with Sero and Me tonight?”

Bakugo replied with a noncommittal shrug. He scrolled absentmindedly through his phone as he and Kirishima headed towards their agencies to call it a day.

He decided to check in on (cam name’s) IG page to see how she was doing.

A pang of longing tugged at him. He missed her. A lot. Sure, she was a cam girl, and being friendly and flirty was her job, but she always brightened his days. With crime picking up steadily over the past year, Bakugo could use her presence in his life now more than ever, unfortunately, nothing in his schedule would permit it.

He was researching a new threat that had been developing in the crime world. Apparently the new mob of villains seemed to have some connections to the crime world in America, and Bakugo found himself flying back and forth to the west for meetings and to make media rounds to help put the public at ease.

His sleep schedule was completely out of whack with all the stress he was under, so any spare moment he wasn’t working, he was sleeping. Which meant no time for his virtual boo thing. Though he did try to make it known he was thinking about her with bill money.

As he flipped through her newest posts, something caught his eyes.

Fuck a fan contest? Winner gets to make content with me at secure location!

What the fuck was this shit?

Whatever it was, he was certainly going to get to the bottom of it when he got home.

CMK: Hey, (cam name) what’s this all about?

Y/N: what does it look like? Fuck a fan contest

CMK: fuck u mean? You don’t do meet ups!

Y/N: 🤷🏾‍♀️ first time for everything.

Anger hummed beneath Bakugo’s skin. Since when did y/n start doing meet ups? She had always told him she didn’t trust her fans as far as she could throw them.

He had encouraged her to not be forthcoming with personal information and never feel like she had to meet up with randos online for money. He would take care of anything she needed before it came to that.

So what was the meaning of this? Had he not been taking good enough care of her? Keeping her bills paid? Her nails and hair done?

Y/N: u entering or what? 👀

CMK: hell no im not entering and neither is anyone else. Now take that shit down.

Y/n: (voice note) first the fuck of all, you don’t tell me what to do. Second the fuck of all, do you know how much money is in this? You ain’t stopping my bag boo. Period! 💅🏾

He was practically seething. Who the fuck did she think she was talking to like that?

Who the fuck did she think she was saying no to?!

His dick stirred in his pants as he re-listened to the voice note of her cursing him out.

CMK: how much does it take to win?

Y/N: just whoever has the most.

CMK tipped $150,000

CMK: now take it the fuck down

Y/N: nobody else has entered yet.

CMK: nobody else up here has the money I have.

Y/N: if you’re not meeting with me, I ain’t takin it down.

CMK: god fucking dammit y/n. Tonight. 9pm. Text me the addy. I’ll have my driver pick you up.

True to his word, CMK had his driver pick you up an hour and a half before the time he had mentioned.

Your knee bounced, causing the black mini dress hugging your shapely thighs to ride up. You pulled it down absentmindedly.

You could count on one hand how many times you had been flown out by one of your fans. It certainly wasn’t a weekly occurrence for you the way it was for other models.

Fear and excitement fluttered in your stomach.

You wondered what the driver thought of you. Heading to this rich and powerful man’s house in the middle of the night.

You had tried to dress up as if you were going to be taken on a fancy date. Your hair styled, silver chandelier earrings dripping from your lobes to match the long silver necklace that dipped between your pushed up cleavage.

If the driver gave two shits, you at least hoped he thought you were going to get a nice meal before getting dicked down.

The community where CMK lived was on the outskirts of town; hidden in a forest of natural and manicured foliage. One could go literal miles between each home before they saw the next one.

You pressed your forehead against the window to take in the flora and fauna, manicured lawns, and huge mansions. So. Many. Styles. Of mansions!

“Here we are ma’am.” the driver announced.

He drove you up a looping, stone drive way that led to a very modern home that reminded you a bit of abstract art what with its odd angles, jutting sides, and square architecture.

The driver stepped out and opened your door. Once you were faced with the massive stairs and wooden doors before you, the song: Pretty Woman blared in your mind. You certainly felt that way.

Before you could knock, the door swung open revealing a pair of red eyes that were devouring your body head to toe.

“Oh my god...”

“Wasn’t expecting to hear that before I even touched you, beautiful.” He chuckled. His lips quirked into the cocky half smirk you’d grown familiar with from his interviews.

Was this real? Call me king was Ground Zero?!

“C-call me king?” You managed to stutter out pitifully.

“I would prefer to call you by your real name.” He joked. “Come in, beautiful.” He grabbed your hand gently and pulled you through the door.

You couldn’t even appreciate the high ceilings, polished wood floors, and tasteful stone wash colored furniture as you followed Ground Zero through the door.

He took leggy strides into the airy kitchen taking out a couple of glasses from a cupboard. You could only gawk.

He looked good as hell in his short sleeved denim button up shirt and ripped black jeans. His physique flexed under the well tailored clothes showing off the broad chest and bulging biceps you’d seen in the Nudes. His spiky Blonde hair looked soft and a bit damp.

“You wanna drink, beautiful?”

“I don’t accept drinks from new people in new environments.”

He looked up to shoot you a half smile. The usual mischief was missing from his red eyes, replaced with genuine affection.

“Of course you don’t. My (cam name.)”

“F/N,” you replied.

“Bout damn time you gave me a real name. Mine is Bakugo, babe.”

He strolled over with a glass of water for himself.

“So, f/n,” his ruby colored eyes darkened with a predatory gleam as he stepped right to your face. “Why don’t you have a seat? I promise the couch won’t bite.”

He brought a hand down to smack your round ass, making you jump.

“Can’t say the same for myself though.”

Licking your lips, you lowered yourself into the couch. Bakugo settled beside you so close the sides of your bodies touched. He draped an arm around your shoulder.

“I know you got a camsona and all, but damn, y/n, where’s my feisty little c/n? Huh? Lil Ms. Period!” His voice took on a lighter tone as he tried to imitate your twang.

The attempt earned him a giggle.

“Well excuse me, sir, but I wasn’t expecting the number two pro-hero in Japan to be my biggest fan.” You snapped back, playfully rolling your eyes. “Forgive me if I’m still wrapping my brain around it.”

“There’s that smart ass mouth I love so much.” He tucked your chin.

This close to him, you could feel his warm minty breath fanning against your lips. A familiar warmth was already growing between your legs.

Pulling away you asked: “Why me?”

“Hah?” His brows knit in confusion. “Fuck kinda question is that? What do you mean why you?”

“I mean, I’m a bad bitch or whatever, but I’m just...me and you’re...you.”

“Tch. You just answered your own damn question, dumb ass.” He tilted your face back towards him. You felt his other large hand roam the bare skin of your thigh and shivered.

“You’re a bad bitch. You don’t seem to forget that any other time, don’t fuckin’ forget it now, got that? Your confidence is what’s sexy about you.”

A smile tugged at your lips as heat flooded your cheeks.

“You know, when you’re not being a fuckin’ asshole, you can be pretty damn charming when you wanna be.”

“And when you’re not being a defiant little brat, you can be real fucking cute.”

A moan slipped from your glossy lips as his hand crept steadily up your thigh

“Please,” you leaned closer to him, “you love my brattiness.”

He scoffed, amused.

“I’ll show you just how much I like it.”

Without warning, Bakugo scooped you up. His large, rough hands dug into the soft flesh of your round ass as he straddled you on his lap.

Your wet, bare pussy pressed into his bulge as he stole a greedy kiss. Your gasp quickly morphed into a moan as desire burned in your core and flooded your entire body.

His tongue overtook your mouth effortlessly.

“No panties, huh, brat? I can feel you leaking through my jeans.”

“I hate panties,” you managed between kisses. “And bras.”

That little confession just inspired more arousal in Bakugo. He deposited you on the long couch and let his hot tongue snake along every sensitive bit of exposed flesh he could find. Goosebumps rose on your skin.

“Damn, beautiful,” he managed between kisses, “can’t wait to taste the rest of you.”

His bulge rubbed your aching clit deliciously.

You tugged his shirt up over his mess of blonde hair.

He grabbed the deep ‘V’ of your dress and ripped it open, drawing a gasp from you.

“Now we match.” He grinned

“You ass—“

“You’ll have a new outfit by tomorrow afternoon, now shut up.”

True to his word, Bakugo tasted every inch of you. He nibbled your ears making you shiver, licked your nipples making you hiss his name, and devoured your toes like blow pops.

Your body was trembling from sensory overload.

“God..” you moaned.

“You look like you want something, babe,” Bakugo smiled wickedly as he hovered above you. “What is it?”

“Eat me.”

[free-pool-trash]

folklore - isaac lahey {7/?}

Hey guys! Sorry for the long wait I’ve been ridiculously busy the past few weeks 😓BUT!!! As compensation I made this part super long and fluffy with sooooooo much Isaac/reader content (enjoy it while you can because shits gonna be messy from here on out 🤭🙈)

Having said that, I don’t have my laptop right now as I moved houses and my stuff got put into storage so I’m working with the mobile version 😓 sorry in advance if formatting is weird I tried to make it better 😓 also there’s no continue reading button so sorry if this comes up on your dash 😭

Let me know what you think tho I’d really appreciate it 💕

Word count: 5.5k 🙈

Warnings: Fluff 😳, mentions of blood, Derek being a PAIN IN THE ASS, Isaac being the cutest 😌✨, ✨kissing✨, swearing

Masterlist

Tag list (open as always): @makeusfreefromthisfandom om, @cece-lives-here here, @chocolate-raspberries , @belsandthings , @dancing-tacos-23 , @truly-dionysus , @britty443 , @tanyaherondale , @furiouspockettoad , @yunsh-17 17, @random-thoughts-003 , @gloomybrieyxb , @futuristicslimemongerbanana , @linkpk88 , @big-galaxy-chaos , @im-a-stranger-thing , @riaisnotcool (I think u had a username change but idk let me know and I can fix it), @its-evita-here , @pad-foots , @sweetpeabellamyblakedracomalfoy , @bookswillfindyouaway , @what-the-hap-is-fuckening , @awkwardnesshabitat , @pieces-by-me me, @wreny24 , @kerosene-angel (if this is the wrong username I’m sorry it wasn’t working the way I had written it down so I’m assuming I just took it down wrong 😳 it it’s not you let me know and I’ll remove you), @marveloucnco o, @babypink224221 let me know if you’d like to be added <3 (strike through means tumblr wouldn’t let me tag you)

The days you’d spent in Mystic Falls bled into weeks and soon enough you were being beckoned back to Beacon Hills with a head full of things you hadn’t had a clue about two weeks prior.

There, of course, was the matter of Peter- who was now dead, well technically, he was murdered.

Derek’s first course of action as Beacon Hills’ new alpha was to break the news to you. He’d killed him but due to Scott and Stiles’ constant text updates, you knew it would’ve had to be done sooner or later. But still, you had a feeling that this wouldn’t be the last of him. That small intuitive feeling in the back of your mind told you that you’d see him again soon. You just hoped your next meeting wouldn’t be happening because you ended up buried next to him.

Over the course of your stay with Alaric, who had left you in the care of the Salvatore brothers- Stefan and Damon, you’d honed several new vampiric powers. As it turned out, some of the powers you possessed were completely unfamiliar to the vampires of over a hundred years.

You had super speed, it wasn’t just enhanced as you’d previously thought. As well as that, you’d discovered that you could run circles around both Stefan and Damon Salvatore, who were obviously a lot older and therefore should’ve been a lot faster.

And for that matter, they should’ve been stronger than you, they should’ve been able to snap you like a twig. They should’ve been able to. But they weren’t. Because not only were you faster, you were stronger too.

While having super speed and super strength was nice, mind compulsion, your most recent discovery, now that was incredible. All you had to do was look into someone’s eyes and they would become completely entranced to do whatever you told them.

Despite being over a hundred years old, neither Stefan nor Damon had ever seen a vampire quite like you.

They’d never seen a vampire who was also an empath, that, apparently, was usually more of a witch thing. Neither of them had ever come across a vampire bite which had a euphoric effect either. But having said all of that… they’d never heard of someone being turned from a wolf bite. Or a vampire who still had a beating heart, for that matter.

Your only real downfalls were that, for one, your blood’s healing capacity didn’t operate at the same speed for you as it did when being used to heal others. You’d put this down to the possibility that maybe your system had just grown too used to it. To be perfectly honest, though, you had no idea.

Secondly, your empathic tendencies were beginning to bring you down, but it wasn’t just that… it was the way in which you’d been instructed, by Damon Salvatore himself, on how to make them stop.

The plane ride home to California dragged on longer than you would’ve liked, the flight was delayed and you were absolutely starving by the time Derek picked you up from the airport. Your parents were still away, they’d travelled to Romania in search of answers to your predicament and they wouldn’t be home until at least next week, so that left Derek on chauffeur and babysitting duty.

“How are you?” He’d only spoken up thirty minutes into the car ride, you let out a sigh from the passenger seat and gave him a tired smile, you could feel the nerves radiating from him. He was afraid you’d be mad at him for killing Peter, and maybe you should’ve been, but again, you had a feeling he’d be back, and besides, spending time with Damon had helped you realise that everything wasn’t so black and white. It finally registered with you that people like Derek and Damon, the dark mysterious bad boys with secret hearts of gold- they sometimes did bad things but with good intentions.

Once you discovered this, you decided amongst yourself that you’d ease up on your not-really-big-brother in the future. Even if it meant you got hurt a little in the process. If hurting you was what he needed to do to learn his lesson then you’d be willing to make that sacrifice.

So you gave him a soft smile and answered, “Hungry.”

Derek let out a chuckle at that, nodding his head towards the backseat, drawing your attention to the three full blood bags laying on the leather seats.

A delighted gasp left your mouth as you snatched the plastic bags into your hands, wasting no time you stuck the attached tube into your mouth and began gulping the first bag down- it was definitely Stiles’ blood you were drinking, you’d gotten so used to the taste of it you were sure you could recognise it anywhere.

Letting out a happy groan you threw your head back against the headrest, “Stiles Stilinski you are a doll.”

Derek chuckled again, glancing at you fondly before his steely eyes returned to the road ahead.

It was only another 30 minutes before you were back in your driveway. “So are you staying here until my parents get back?” You questioned from the porch as Derek got your bags from the trunk of his car, the wolf shook his head with a smile, “Nah, I’ve got some stuff to do at home.”

“Derek, that home isn’t even structurally sound.” You chastised softly. Surely he’d be happier spending time with the family he still had breathing rather than living in the remnants of what used to be his.

Walking up to the porch, Derek placed your case down gently by your feet and moved himself to stand in front of you. A genuine smile painted his lips as he gazed at you, “New rule.” He stated, placing both of his hands on either of your forearms before going on, eyes staring affectionately into your own, “From now on, I will be doing all the worrying about you, alright? Not the other way around.”

With a defeated sigh, you nodded your head. “I’ll try my best.” That had been a lie. Unable to blind you with his unusually sweet sentiment, through the physical contact you could tell he was scheming.

“Good. Now, go get some rest I’ll come check up on you in the morning.” He kissed your forehead and then made his way back to his car, speeding out of your driveway and out of sight before you’d even unlocked the door.

The house was cold and empty when you’d re-entered. A shiver ran up your spine the second your feet stepped past the threshold. Something was very wrong, and unfortunately, you couldn’t tell what exactly it was that was so wrong. The feeling was unnerving, it was dark and it was agonisingly heavy. Like anxiety on steroids, lots of steroids.

Swallowing thickly, you gripped -more like clawed- at your chest. Nails scraping your skin as you attempted to catch a single breath, though it seemed that oxygen was determined to outrun you as you glanced around helplessly.

Almost twenty minutes has passed as you heaved and gasped frantically, overwhelming dread flooded your chest while simultaneously tears flooded your eyes, and still you didn’t have even the slightest idea of what it all meant.

And then it hit you. That panic- it didn’t belong to you.

Within a second you’d risen to your feet, breathing still staggered while you rushed out the front door, your vampire speed being put to good use as within seconds you were where your panic had led you. Night had fallen by now and it was completely dark, not to mention absolutely freezing, the hoodie you had on doing nothing to protect you from the biting cold in the air. The trail of feelings you’d been chasing had led you to Beacon Hills cemetery and before your eyes, there it was, the something that was very wrong.

Derek and Isaac. More specifically, Derek’s teeth buried in Isaac’s arm. You hadn’t even registered what you were doing when you ripped Derek from Isaac and violently threw him across the cemetery, the impact in which the Hale hit the tree all the way at the edge of the graveyard was a testimony to your strength. You hadn’t even used half it.

Without hesitation, you inspected Isaac’s body frantically, eyes lingering on the bloody bite across his right arm. Slowly and mournfully, your eyes met his, which were wide with shock. His heart was beating out of his chest to the point where you couldn’t ignore it.

“What did he do to you?” The question slipped out as a whisper, your anger melted away only to be replaced by dread as Isaac began to speak, “He offered me the bite and I- I said yes.”

“Isaac…” Your gaze drifted to the bite and you weren’t surprised to see it already healed. “I’m sorry.” You heard him mutter from above you, his anxiety pooling in your chest and mixing with his guilt.

Shaking your head softly you pulled him into you, your arms wrapped tightly around his shoulders while his own arms held you tightly against him as you kissed his temple to release him of the intense anxiety plaguing him. “Don’t be sorry. I understand.”

He relaxed against you upon hearing your words, the two weeks you’d been gone made him realise something, he was utterly useless without you, or so he thought. He felt weak. He felt as though if he didn’t have you as emotional support he was defective. Derek had honed in on that and manipulated it to his advantage, convinced Isaac that the bite was what he needed in order to be strong by himself. To keep you safe instead of you protecting him all of the time.

“Was that really necessary?” Derek’s voice broke the moment and you found anger was surging through you once again. You separated from Isaac to face Derek.

At this point, you didn’t care what his intentions had been, you weren’t going to let him away with this.

“I’m going to give you three seconds to explain why you did this.” As Derek moved to speak you ruthlessly cut him off. “Too slow.” And with that the back of your hand met his cheek, again sending him flying, only not as far this time.

His fangs were barred now, as were yours. Both of your eyes glowing, his red ones threatening as he attempted to demonstrate his power. And yet again, you had a revelation.

You couldn’t stop the laugh that fell from your lips, a synacal and sarcastic lilt to it as you towered over Derek’s form on the floor.

“Oh I get it!” You exclaimed, lip held between your teeth in mock disbelief you pressed your palm to your forehead as you spoke, “You thought you’d go around and stalk some kids so you could add to your big bad pack. Right?” He growled at you and attempted to pick himself up, only for you to give a swift, hard kick to his chest, returning his back to the dirt.

“I guess you told him it’d make him stronger? That it’d make all of his problems go away? And what about the Argent’s, huh? Did you tell him that you were manipulating him?” It was then, again in panic, Isaac spoke up to your surprise, in Derek’s defence.

“(Y/n), I promise it isn’t like that! He told me everything, it was my choice I said yes!” You spared him a glance before crouching down to Derek.

“Well did you tell him how you usually treat your pack?” The words were dripping in venom and the guilt that radiated from the man didn’t deter you from moving forward with you verbal attack, your head turning to Isaac, your eyes sparkling with sadness as you locked eyes with him, speaking hoarsely you wondered out loud, “Did he tell you that he’s a liar? That he doesn’t know how to run a pack? That if he doesn’t understand you he’ll leave you in the dust?”

The look on his face spoke volumes as he recalled the state Derek had put you in the weeks previous.

With a final sneer in Derek’s direction you delivered your parting words, “You better treat him better than you continue to treat me or so help me Derek Hale I will tear you to shreds.”

As you angrily stormed away, Isaac stood in confusion for a second before he began to chase after you, leaving Derek on the dirt floor to help himself.

“(Y/n)! (Y/n) please wait!” He shouted as he was just starting to catch up to you. When you felt that you were at a good enough distance away from Derek you finally slowed your pace.

When Isaac finally made it to your side, he was panting slightly, swallowing the lump in his throat he nervously grabbed your hand.

“I’m sorry.” He repeated, his eyes resembling those of a puppy and you could already feel your composure slipping away from you as you looked at him.

It’d been almost three weeks since you’d seen him, three weeks since you’d made out in the school basement and this definitely wasn’t how you were expecting the reunion to go.

“Isaac it isn’t your fault. I’m not mad at you, ok? I get it. I’m just worried, this town isn’t exactly kind on the supernatural.” You reassured him gently, squeezing his hand and giving him a sad smile.

“Don’t worry about me.” Isaac told you and you had to laugh, “Sorry, babe but I will not be taking my eyes off you until this town becomes normal.”

Isaac’s face was then taken over by, what could only be described as, a Cheshire Cat smile, “Did you just call me babe?” His voice was teasing and you felt your face heating up despite your freezing temperature.

Sucking on the inside of your cheek you tried your best to conceal your growing smile, you shrugged innocently, “Yeah. What about it?” The playful lilt in your voice had his smile widening even more as he began to lean down to you, his face getting closer to yours by the second.

His breath fanned across your lips when he spoke next, “I liked it.” With that, his lips pressed to yours cautiously, as if he was still unsure of whether or not it was okay to do so.

His uncertainty melted away when he felt your lips begin to reciprocate his actions and your hands moved to cup his cheeks.

The both of you could agree that this kiss was different than the last one you’d shared a few weeks ago. “Why is it that we only ever kiss when one of us is coming out as a supernatural creature?” Isaac laughed against your lips as you pulled away with a sigh.

“It would be us wouldn’t it.”

After a few minutes of nagging at Isaac you managed to put all the pieces of Derek’s plan together. Isaac himself didn’t actually know all that much, just that he was the first to be turned, but that alone told you everything that you needed to know.

Derek was now an alpha with no pack, so logically, a pack was what he was building and that would have been perfectly understandable- if he hadn’t started with your best friend.

“There’s a full moon coming up, did he tell you what would happen?” You questioned gently, ready to throttle Derek when the boy in front of you shook his head.

Heaving a deep breath you squeezed his hand reassuringly, the initial excitement of being turned had worn off and Isaac was beginning to radiate anxiety once again.

“Don’t worry okay? I’m gonna call Scott, he’ll be able to help you.” Isaac’s eyebrows came together in confusion, “Scott McCall?”

You nodded your head, “He’ll know how to help.” You tried to convince Isaac without spilling Scott’s secret. Not that it was going to stay a secret for too long, but it wasn’t your secret to tell.

Isaac shook his head rapidly, his hands moving to hold your forearms, his panic at your suggestion hitting you like a freight train as he stared into your eyes, a wild look in his own.

“No no no no. You can’t tell anyone. (Y/n) promise me you won’t tell anyone okay? If my dad finds out I’m a werewolf he’ll-“ The words came out almost as fast as you could run and his panic only intensified when his father entered his mind.

Quickly catching on to his looming panic attack as his eyes began to glow yellow you cut him off, “Isaac.”

He didn’t hear you as he kept rambling, claws growing past his nails and digging into your arm, “No he’ll kill me. Oh my god he’s gonna kill me. (Y/n) he’s go-“

Yes, it would’ve been easy to rip your arms from his grasp that was causing you quite a lot of pain as his nails sunk into your skin as his hands held onto you desperately. However, you had a feeling that his hold on your now bloody forearms was the only thing keeping him from spiralling completely out of control.

“Isaac! Look at me!” Your voice was strict but served to make his amber eyes finally settle on yours.

Gently, you finally slipped your arms out of Isaac’s clawed grip, although you were sure it would’ve been less painful to just leave them, his claws dragged down your arms while you lifted them slowly and cautiously until you replaced them with your hands, using your new grasp of the boy to provide him with some peace of mind.

You focused your energy on shifting a sense of relaxation from your own palms to Isaac’s sweaty ones as you spoke, voice soft again, “I’m not going to tell anyone. It’s just you and me, alright? Focus on me, yeah?” Isaac nodded his head, still slightly frantic but calmer than before as he did as you told and simply focused on you, “Take a deep breath.” You instructed, breathing steadily along with him until his eyes returned to their natural blue colour and his claws retracted.

A moment of silence passed with Isaac slumped against you, hands held tightly in his while he steadied his breathing. You placed your lips to his cheek and then again to the bruise forming beneath his right eye, you hadn’t noticed it earlier. You’d almost forgotten it’d been nearly three weeks since you’d been together, he’d probably been though it with his demon of a sperm doner over the time you were away.

“I’ve missed you.” It was Isaac that broke the silence when your lips disconnected from his injured face.

“I missed you too.” You replied simply, there was so much you’d planned on saying to him while you were in Mystic Falls but at the moment, you felt there were more pressing matters to discuss and again, it was Isaac who spoke.

He pulled away slightly to look at you properly, hands still clasping yours, he gave them a squeeze before he started speaking, “This pack that Derek’s building… I’m guessing you’re not in it?”

“I was never asked. But I’ve kind of already got a pack, which you are more than welcome to join.” You responded hopefully, wishing he’d agree but you knew he wouldn’t. As such a fresh beta he’d stay loyal to his alpha, but, you had to ask.

Isaac nodded his head sadly, “Scott McCall?” You let out a small laugh, at how quickly he’d caught on, “Yeah. He’s not exactly an alpha but he’s helped me out a lot, more than Derek has.”

“Derek told me that wolves are stronger as a pack, he didn’t say anything about vampires though.” Isaac went on, a confused lilt in his voice.

“I found out in Mystic Falls that vampires rarely belong to packs and by vampire nature I don’t need one, but Ric figures that it’s in my nature to want one since it’s all I’ve ever known.” You relayed the information to Isaac.

“Then why not, you know, join mine?” His lip was pulled between his teeth and he was looking at you with a hopeful expression.

“Isaac I just told you…” You said pleadingly, you didn’t want to upset him any further but you also couldn’t throw away the pack bond you’d built with Scott and Stiles when you’d first turned. If it was a matter of Isaac’s pack being made up of just Isaac there would’ve been no problems, it was the fact that it wasn’t Isaac’s pack but Derek’s.

Scratching what you’d decided about Derek earlier, you came to a new agreement with yourself: all of hell would freeze over before you even thought of easing up on Derek Hale.

Isaac threw his head back with a groan, “Come on, (N/n)! We are not going to let our love play out like Romeo and Juliet!” The way he spoke was humorous but it was obvious that he wasn’t really joking.

With a sigh you moved your shaking hands, that were now covered in scabbed over cuts as opposed to their previous status of raw and bleeding, to Isaac’s face. Your thumbs moved gently along his cheek bones as you took him in with an encouraging smile on your face as you told him confidently, “I refuse to let us become a modern day Romeo and Juliet, that’s not happening.”

You pulled him closer to you, slipping your arms around his shoulders and doing your best to ignore the butterflies rioting in your stomach when his arms wrapped tentatively around your waist.

You brought your lips to meet his briefly before fixing him with another determined look, “But listen to me, we might be loyal to different packs but I’m on your side, no matter what.”

Isaac nodded his head in understanding, “If it comes down to it, I’m always gonna choose you.” He responded honestly, arms tightening around you to hold you against his chest, his height causing his chin to be tilted downwards so that he could meet your eyes.

“I meant what I said to Derek, by the way.” You informed, Isaac’s eyebrows rose in confusion again, “If he mistreats you I’ll tear him apart.”

“Should I give Scott the same warning?” Isaac asked humorously and you had to shake your head in order to hold back a laugh.

It wasn’t until you’d separated from your embrace with Isaac that you took into account the fact that your body was now shaking with the cold.

“Come on, I’ve gotta call my dad and probably the sheriff and you’re freezing.” Isaac stated, wrapping an arm around your shoulder and leading you back to the cemetery where you noticed his overturned excavator and the dug up grave plot.

You listened with curiosity while Isaac spoke to his father on the phone, trying to explain exactly what had transpired in the last couple of hours since his shift started.

“How the hell does an excavator just flip over, Isaac?” You could hear his fathers anger through the line and Isaac fumbled for a response, “Someone, or something- I don’t know it could’ve been an animal, but it got pushed from the side and tipped over. I fell into the plot I was digging and that was it, I didn’t see the rest.” He explained weakly.

“You still stuck in hole, you idiot?” You watched as Isaac clenched his jaw and motioned to yourself when he was finally looking at you, “No. No, um, (Y/n) just got back from Virgina, she came looking for me and helped me out.”

“She still there?” His father questioned, seemingly cooling off at the mention of your name. You hated how much that man seemed to like you when he should’ve held that affection for his actual son.

“Yeah, she’s with me now.” Isaac confirmed and you offered up a fake cheerful, “Hi, Mr Lahey!”

“Invite her over while I call the sheriff and see about getting this mess cleaned up.” With that, he hung up the phone and Isaac sighed, “You’re starting to look like Mr. Freeze, let’s get you warmed up.” His arm stayed comfortably wrapped around your shoulder and as you reached up to hold his hand that was hanging over your shoulder you stopped dead in your tracks, “Isaac, I can’t go and greet your father looking like this.”

You motioned to your torn and bloodstained hoodie, immediately regretting it when his eyes widened in shock, “Did I… oh god (Y/n) did I do that?”

Not missing a beat you grabbed his hands and made sure you soothed his panic before you got a rerun of earlier.

“It’s not your fault. You’re new to this, okay? Mistakes happen and that’s fine it’s all part of the process. And look!-” You pulled off the hoodie to reveal your now completely healed arms and hands, nothing but dried blood to show that the claw marks were even there in the first place. “‘M all healed up! No harm done.” You reassured him, bringing his lips to yours to further convince him that you were okay and distract him from the guilt you could feel building within him.

Your arms, although no longer cut, were covered in goosebumps as Isaac ran his hands affectionately down the length of them. “It won’t happen again.” He promised and you gave him a shaky smile, teeth beginning to chatter, “Let’s go home?” Isaac nodded his head, nothing short of ripping his own hoodie off before pulling your arms through the sleeves and moving himself in front of you to zip it up.

You watched completely content as he fumbled with the zipper. His curls were falling in front of his eyes and his eyes were squinted in concentration. The quiet, but triumphant, “got it” he let out when he finally finessed the zipper had you grinning like a fool.

When he moved his focus from the zip and back to your face, he smiled bashfully, “What’re you looking at me like that for?”

The sleeves of his hoodie, that was miles too big for you, hung far past your wrists and brushed against the nape of his neck, your fingers finding a place tangled in his hair while you stared at him, grin ever present.

Your other hand was otherwise occupied being placed firmly against Isaac’s chest, enjoying the feeling of his rapidly beating heart, and you didn’t know it entirely. But in that moment it was beating for you and you alone.

Isaac’s hand made itself comfortable holding your waist, the other holding your own against his chest, keeping it in place.

Neither of you needed to say it. You could both feel it. But still, you found yourself uttering the words, “I love you.”

Not half a second had passed before Isaac echoed your declaration, “I love you.”

“I feel like if I kiss you right now I won’t be able to stop but I’m still freezing my ass off so… your place?”

Isaac nodded his head in agreement, “My place.”

*

Upon arrival at the Lahey residence, Mr. Lahey had greeted you with a wide smile and ushered you into the kitchen where he instructed Isaac to make you some tea, to which Isaac had to restrain a grumble as he’d been planning on doing it anyway.

Mr. Lahey was happily chatting away to you when Isaac set down two cups of tea, one in front of his father and one in front of you, his eyes lingering on you with a certain kind of glint before he turned back to the counter to grab his own cup and returning to sit beside you at the table.

Isaac was, in all honesty, losing it. He didn’t even know why. You were just sitting there, wrapped up in his hoodie, nose ever so slightly pink from the cold, talking politely to his father. It was nothing out of the ordinary but he was finding it hard to think about anything other than how his hoodie would look splayed on the floor of his bedroom.

He wasn’t very good at hiding it either, you could feel it as clear as day. Teenage boy hormones mixing with teenage werewolf hormones were causing havoc and it’d be a lie to say it wasn’t having an affect on you.

Trying to return your attention to whatever Mr.Lahey was babbling about you clearing your throat and took a sip of your tea, keeping your expression neutral as Isaac’s hand slipped to your knee under the table. His attempt to pull you into his mess of hormones was obviously successful as you found yourself ready to yell out in frustration when his hand stayed put on your knee for a solid twenty minutes before his father finally rose from the table.

“I’m going to check out the situation at the cemetery, you’re welcome to stay tonight, it’s pretty dangerous out there these days.” Mr. Lahey offered and you smiled innocently at him as he stood in the doorway, “I think I’ll take you up on that. Thank you.” The older man gave you a nod but said no more before walking out the front door.

“What the hell are you doing?” You finally burst when the front door clicked shut, whipping around to face Isaac.

“What?” He asked as if his hand didn’t start sliding further up your leg the second his father left the room.

You groaned, “Don’t ‘what?’ me when you’re about four centimetres from having your hand between my thighs!”

“Sorry.” He immediately retracted his hand, eyes wide as he realised how close his hand was to reaching the top of your thigh, “I, um, I didn’t mean to- I mean, I did mean to but i won’t do it again if you don’t want me to-“

“Isaac.” You cut him off, lip pulled between your teeth, “I want you to.” You declared and he let out a heavy sigh full of relief, “Thank God.” He muttered before he was pulling you up off the chair and right against his chest.

His lips immediately found yours and his hands were gripping your waist like there was no tomorrow.

At this point, the butterflies in your stomach were going absolutely bat shit feral when his lips began to trail past your lips, to your chin, then to the curve of your jaw. It was when his hand slipped deftly up your side to settle against your jaw that you realised just how much you’d been wanting this.

Isaac’s lips fell further to your neck and you couldn’t stop the hum of approval that escaped your mouth at the sensation of his soft lips sucking and licking at your pulse. “It this okay?” He asked in a mutter, the dainty and nervous nature of his voice contrasting greatly with the confidence and ferocity of his actions.

Your hands tugged gently at his hair to get him to meet you clouded eyes, when he looked at you you were sure that his eyes had flashed yellow, his breathing was getting heavy and you had an inkling that his lips on your neck was the most exciting thing that was going to happen between you tonight.

“It’s more than okay.” You told him with a dopey smile, letting out a laugh when he dived back into the crook of your neck, kissing your skin through a smile.

Despite your words your hands moved to his chest to push him away slightly, “But…” you started as Isaac threw his head back with a groan, “I think we should stop, and maybe revisit this after the full moon passes.”

After taking in a steadying breath Isaac nodded in agreement, “Yeah, you’re probably right.” His hand slipped into yours and he intertwined his fingers with yours, he spent a moment just looking at your linked hands with a fond smile and the look of achievement on his face. It was easy to tell, with the help of your empathic powers, that Isaac was proud of himself.

You yourself couldn’t quite pinpoint why he was feeling so prideful in the moment, but he knew. To be truthful he wasn’t just proud of himself, he was downright ecstatic. He’d been nothing more than your best friend since you were both eleven, and now, six years later he finally crossed the threshold from being your best friend to being your- well actually now that he thought about it, he wasn’t sure what he is to you now.

A few hours passed before Isaac worked up the courage to ask the question that had formed in his mind after his make out session with you earlier.

The pair of you had since gotten comfortable in his bed, which was nothing particularly new. You laid on your side with your back to the bedroom door, Isaac was behind you, his chin tucked in between your shoulder and your neck with his arms around your torso holding you close to him.

“Can I ask you something?” His voice broke through the silence and you responded with a tired hum, adjusting his arm so you could snuggle closer and tried your best to stop yourself from falling asleep while he murmured softly in your ear.

“What are we?” He kept his eyes trained on the dark room ahead of him, his hand grabbing yours as you readjusted his arm and he absentmindedly began playing with your fingers, the action being successful in calming his nerves.

“What do you want us to be?” You asked sleepily in response, a small smile forming on your face as you heard his heartbeat speeding up.

Isaac let out a nervous breath against your neck and you held back a shudder at the feeling, “I was kind of thinking that all the kissing would make us a couple.” Letting out another sleepy hum, if it was even physically possible, you snuggled deeper into his hold. You sluggishly turned your head to place a light kiss against his cheek, “Then we’re a couple.”