#<- mac is looking at blueberry

[number1mackinnie]

i see what you mean by the yuri & yaoi thing, but in the banner isn't lemony looking at mac??

it could be either mac or blueberry . we'lll never know

while writing this i realized it is mac . sigh

if lemony was staring at blueberry her eyes would have to be like . here

because mac is in front of blueberry so hes blocking her from seeing blueberry

(at least thats i think what it would look like from lemonys view)

[suitelif3]

The sweet taste of eggnog

rated t | 1.2k | ao3

For @steddiemas, prompt: baking, eggnog

**

The bell dinged above his head as he opened the door, immediately smelling the wafting scents of blueberry, lemon, chocolate, and gingerbread, overwhelming his nose with the sweet scents. Eddie could already feel his mouth watering, his sweet tooth on the prowl for something good. The variety of pastries and desserts were never ending, all of them stacked behind the glass counters. His eyes scanned his options, but had no idea where to start. Everything looked so good, he could hardly decide.

“Be with you in a minute!” A voice called from the back.

Eddie took his time walking up and down, peering through the glass, trying to narrow his options down.

“Hey, find what you’re looking for?” The voice said from right in front of him.

Eddie looked up to see a fucking Adonis of a man, he had gorgeous eyes that were shining brightly, chestnut hair pushed back with smears of flour in it and a light dusting of white on his cheek. The man seemed to be doing a lot of activity in the back since he had splotches of red along his neck and jawline. Eddie wanted to see how far down they went.

“Yes, absolutely.” Eddie gazed intently into this beautiful man’s eyes.

“Great! What can I get you?” The man grinned, his face radiating, and making Eddie positively weak at the knees.

“Your name.” Eddie breathed out. He flushed, not meaning to have said that out loud.

“Oh!” The man parted his lips in surprise, looking confused for a split second before turning his lips up into a soft smile. “It’s Steve.”

**

Eddie started coming in regularly, always eager to talk to Steve. Every time Eddie ordered something, they chatted about a multitude of things: their interests, hobbies, favorite movies, music they liked -“You need to listen to Master of Puppets, Steve. It has the best guitar solo you will ever hear!” “As long as you listen to Backstreets.” “Deal.”- trips they wanted to take, dreams they had for the future, and pretty much anything else they could think of. Eddie was falling for Steve harder the more and more he came into the bakery.

A couple months into Eddie coming by a few times a week - he noticed his pants were getting a little tighter - he decided he was finally going to ask Steve out. It was getting closer to Christmas, and he wanted to have some holiday dates with Steve like walking around looking at the lights, hands intertwined, and clutching mugs filled with hot chocolate. He wanted to wear ugly sweaters together, all snuggled by the fire, with A Wonderful Life playing in the background. He wanted to take a stroll through the snow, and maybe kiss Steve under the mistletoe when he came over. But he was running out of time.

He pushed open the door, the familiar ding of the bell interrupting the quiet from inside.

Steve came out from the back, holding a large cardboard box. His biceps flexed holding up the weight, and Eddie stared unabashedly.

“Hey, Eddie!” Steve smiled at him like he always did, his whole face lifting, crinkles around his eyes. He was so beautiful when he smiled like this. “We have some holiday specials, wanna try some?”

“I always want to try what you make, sweetheart.”

Steve honest to god giggled, and Eddie wanted to savor the sound if he didn’t get to hear it over and over again. He watched Steve put down the box, the veins of his arms protruding. “I was hoping you would come by today, I just baked a new batch I wanted to sell for the holidays this morning. We have some gingersnap, peppermint, shortbread, and eggnog cookies. Any of those sound appealing?”

“All of them do, sweetheart. But I do have some fond memories of the taste of eggnog.” Eddie briefly remembered the Christmas nights he would have with his Uncle Wayne, him taking off work from the plant, and spending the night with Eddie. How after the big Christmas dinner they could afford - mostly being boxed mac and cheese, deviled eggs, a casserole they could throw together, and maybe a discounted ham if they could fine one - they would drink their weight in eggnog, talk throughout the night and later fall asleep watching whatever Christmas movie they could find.

Steve nodded his head with a smile. “Eggnog it is then.”

Eddie waited until Steve got the cookies from the back, trying to obtain the confidence to ask Steve out. He fidgeted in place, hoping this would all go well.

Steve came back, presenting a whole tray of eggnog cookies. They smelled of saccharine, and looked delicious. The cookies were in the shape of a glass, with icing filling it with the color of eggnog. They were so cute and christmassy, and Eddie knew Steve put his all into these cookies. Like he always did.

Eddie picked a cookie off the tray, immediately taking a bite. He couldn’t help the little moan he let out around the cookie. It tasted so good, the flavor melting in his mouth, and taking him right back to those Christmas nights with his Uncle. The cookies tasted heavenly.

“Oh my god, Steve.” Eddie groaned out. “These are devine, literally transporting me to all the times I drank eggnog but sweeter! I need to take so many of these home, my Uncle would love them.”

“You can take as many as you want Eds. I can even give you a dozen on the house.” Steve winked at him.

“Literally marry me.” Eddie breathed out.

Steve flushed, the red spreading on his cheeks, all the way down his neck, maybe further but Eddie couldn’t see under his sweater. “Uh- what?” Steve half laughed.

Eddie froze, not believing he was ruining his chance. I mean how could he not want to marry the man who not only looked like a god but could bake the most godly creations Eddie had the pleasure of tasting. He wanted Steve in any way he could have him, and needed Steve to know that.

“Um, I mean, only if you would want to, but not like now! In like a couple years maybe, if things go well. But we also don’t have to! Just throwing it out there, really. But I would love at least a date. With you. At some point in the distant future. We could go on a holiday date maybe?” Eddie floundered.

He couldn’t read the look on Steve’s face, but it looked almost fond, endearing maybe? It was hard to tell behind all of the panic Eddie was currently feeling.

“I would love to.” Steve beamed at him.

“Oh! You would?” Eddie burned crimson, feeling hot all the way to the tips of his ears.

“Yes, Eddie. I’ve been waiting for you to ask.” Steve’s eyes sparkled, making him look even more stunning.

Steve leaned over the counter, reaching to pull Eddie closer. Eddie went willingly, helpless to do anything but follow.

Steve cupped his cheek, and pressed their lips together in a sweet, chaste kiss. When Steve pulled away, Eddie lingered in his space, their lips brushing. Eddie pulled him in again, deepening the kiss. He could taste the sweetness of Steve’s mouth, running his tongue along the edge. He savored the subtle hints of eggnog coating Steve’s soft lips. It was all he could ever wish for Christmas.

**

I’m actually pretty proud of this one! let me know what you think, always eager to hear comments <3

thank you to my beta reader @hiseyebrowsaregone!

[py-dreamer]

Yea!!! Can you tell I have favorites lol

so since it's the 20th in my time, it is officially my birthday today!

But I wanted to get this out regardless so kinda count it as the previous day's ig

I will be posting something later today probably but it will most likely just be a compilation of all the cakes I've done thus far.

Ok but um on with the cake!

It's like a cheesecake and I basically copied Tengen's cake with like a jelly filling with fruit suspended in it, peaches (obviously), strawberries and blueberries cause I like them and sod it I'll put them on this goddamn cake!

The thing Wukong's sitting on is one of those peach ice creams that's gotten so popular lately with the sprinkle of pink dust thingy on top.

On either side of the cake is the fillet from the journey and the hat from the brotherhood era, one from his reckless past and one from his redemption and I just think that's neat.

The blue puffy stuff is meant to be his nimbus clouds represented as cotton candy.

I have the baiju jar in there as reference to Wukong becoming immortal again due to the all the wine made from the peaches of immortality at the festival.

The staff as a little candle was so fun! And I like pocky so I chucked them on there to fill space and it looks good so sue me

The grey thing behind the staff and balloon is meant to be the Buddha's hand that trapped him under the mountain and a reference to his imprisonment under 5 phases mountain.

Peach popsicle! Of course I had too! A lil something from the present for our (shadow) peachy friend

Mk's stone as well, had to add his son in there too. The baby ever.

(probably just a cookie but it's the thought that counts)

The two sugar cookies are meant to be his logo (aka the lmk logo) and fireworks, again taken from Tengen's cake.

The sun is a candied/tanghulu esque orange thing. Like an orange slice coated in yellow melted sugar shaped like a sun and the phoenix feather cap since I consider it iconic enough to put in here. I didn't want to put it on him, blocking a lot of the decorations so I just hung it to the side and I think I'm happy with that.

A lot more monkeys here! It was very fun popping them in! I know I only gave Mac 1 but I mean Wukong's the monkey king for a reason. Let him be a loving grandpa and invite his subjects on the cake with him. He granted them immortality by ripping their names out the book of dead, let them have a place on the cake too

Also, yes that is the origami pilgims in the bottom left, I couldn't leave them alone could I?

Now the elephant in the room (or at least in my head), yes I did use @maplesleep's matcha pancake design for flower fruit mountain.

Cake on cake. Bit much but hey, I like cake and pastries better than candy normally so win for me.

And I couldn't just make cake about Sun Wukong without mentioning his home/origins of ffm. I do genuinely love the inginuity and adorableness factor of the pancake design and hope they don't mind me slapping it on my...cheesecake? Jelly cake? Jelly-cheesecake?

(also I have to ask @maplesleep, did you watch the 3rd emirichu anime cafe video, specifically the urusei yatsura cafe as inspiration for the 'sun wukong's strawberry sponge cake punishment' parfait thingy, gorgeously drawn btw I used those drawings as inspiration quite a bit for these cakes, or saw the urusei yatsura collab anime cafe

cause I couldn't help but notice the similarities between that and the 'shinobu's maiden strength parfait' cause if you didn't that be a pretty funny coincidence lol)

So what do you think? You think I could make it as another lmk food chef for lego? Can I join the club lmao?

I do realize in retrospect the disrespect I did Mk by making his cake so plain by comparison to his mentor's. But I think that's a testament to my improvement and attention to detail when making these cakes as the days have progressed!

I consider Mk's in particular to be the most lacking and I lowkey feel so bad for my boi for not giving him the main character status he deserves.

I might draw him again, idk. Not anytime soon though, like I said, I'm quite busy now more than before and I need a break, still glad I could serve y'all another slice of cake though!

[maculategiraffe]

baby's current top twenty favorite things to do at my house:

1. make rice on the stove

2. make popcorn on the stove

3. find the hole in the back yard where a bunny might live

4. find acorns on the ground and smash them with a hammer

5. make blueberry tea

6. watch the episode of the new adventures of winnie the pooh where they go to a movie about a giant spider and christopher robin accidentally drops his popcorn bucket on the movie usher's head*

7. play "christopher robin accidentally drops his popcorn on the movie usher's head," taking turns being christopher robin ("oh no I dropped my popcorn!!") and the movie usher ("lose your popcorn, kid?? this is a movie theater, not a playground!")

8. play "giant spider chases piglet around the house"

9. play "uncle boyfriend chases baby around the house and picks him up and flips him upside down and tosses him onto the sofa" five thousand times

10. jump back and forth between the mama tree stump and the baby tree stump in the yard

11. drink the costco brand of oat milk, which only tastes good at my house and not at mommy and daddy's

12. open and close the toaster oven doors

13. peek in at hildegard and ask "why is she a snake?"

14. steal uncle boyfriend's shoes while he's in the bathroom and hide them in the ash bucket

15. wear auntie mac's sunglasses that make everything look orange

16. laundry

17. play elevator (go behind floor length curtains and say 'going up' and 'going down')

18. sweep the pollen off the deck

19. play kitty cat (eat snacks from a round lidded container he has dubbed his kitty cat bowl)

20. replace any batteries and light bulbs that seem to need it

I don't even have any toys at my house

*this is the only episode we have ever watched or seem likely to ever watch

[lvrcpid]

headcannons - modern!au

— my personal headcannons for my modern!au

neteyam

- keeps his room really tidy

- he probably works at tillys or footlocker

- most likely has a newer car since he’s a top tier child

- had braces from age 10 to 15

- i think he keeps his locs short

- speaking of locs, he knows how to retwist so he saves money on that part

- he’s allergic to nuts and blueberries

- he loves 2pac and biggie

- his favorite holiday is most likely christmas

- cargo pants are his go to

- probably asked lo’ak to put him on with you

- has the prettiest smile ever

lo’ak

- he doesn’t wanna work , he kisses up to mo’at for money

- he wears glasses and sometimes contacts

- he has his permit , his 9 months aren’t up yet 💀

- probably makes soundcloud music but it’s actually good

- he doesn’t tell anyone this but he wants to be a vet when he grows up

- he’s a dog lover , wants a dog named rico

- always taking tsireya on dates cause his love language is quality time

- he vapes. i’m sorry he just does.

- probably still gets in hella trouble

- when and if he does get a job, he works at footlocker/tillys with neteyam (he didn’t wanna do the interviews , he thinks they’re cringe)

- his room either smells of his vapes, chips or the occasional wallflowers neytiri makes him use

- everyone thinks his name is so cool and unique

kiri

- she plays guitar. no more.

- has a pet guinea pig

- probably plays roblox in her free time

- stays cutting and dying her hair

- she probably doesn’t care she’s adopted

- she bakes a lot

- girl in red is her favorite artist

- vines and incense are a must in her room

- her and rotxo are dating but they probably have that “im not ashamed of you i just don’t want everyone in our business” type relationship

- she works at khols and gets khols cash for her mom

- she probably smokes weed

- she definitely does.

- she’s not like always high but she’s always high

ao’nung

- he loves sleeping

- he also wears glasses but hate the way they shape his face

- he probably has a few tattoos ngl

- he stays looking at fight videos on twitter

- idc he’s a big cuddler

- he’s the type to see crying as a weakness

- still has ronals smile

- speaking of ronal he’s a mommas boy

- the type to secretly take pictures of you and set them as his background and get flustered when you point it out

- he probably doesn’t work since being an athlete takes up most of his time but when the season is over he works at zumiez

tsireya

- a big crybaby ngl

- pageant princess back in the day

- she probably knows how to play the violin

- head over heels for lo’ak

- she wants to marry this boy

- she probably wears a lot of vans

- i see her being prone to sickness really often like she’s always catching a cold and allergies are the devil

- i’m sorry but she vapes too , she does not CAREEEEEE

- avid starbucks drinker

- her favorite food is shrimp

- contrary to popular belief her and aonung are very close and have sleep overs all the time

- she works at a hair salon as an assistant

tuk

- that girl lives in claire’s

- reminder she is 8 , let’s give our girl some credit

- she’s probably not an ipad kid. she probably has her own phone and is surprisingly really responsible with it

- girl is so ready for high school and hasn’t even hit middle school yet

- i don’t see her as the type to kid to love sweets, something tells me tuk is more of a i’ll eat it but i know when to stop type kid

- lo’ak doesn’t watch her, she watches lo’ak

- probably mature enough to be left at home by herself

- she loves mac and cheese

- that is her MEAL

- she never knows what she wants to eat

- they’re always in the restaurant waiting on tuk

- i don’t see her as a big crybaby but moral support for her siblings like she’s always like “i’m here for you” when lo’ak and jake get into it , not like ranting but you get it

- her and neteyam are partners in crime

- her bedtime is 8:30 , 9:00 when she’s completed her homework early

- she’s so SASSYYYYY

[ily-fictional-women]

Take Out, Maybe?

Summary: Not everyone can cook, and not everyone is meant to. 

Pairing: Kate Bishop x fem!reader

Warnings: Minor mentions of blood 

Word count: 1293

a/n: This is loosely inspired by that one Tom Holland interview where he mentions Zendaya tried to cook for him when he got back from a shoot. (Reblogs are welcome and critiques/advice are heavily encouraged, but please no translating.)

More often than not Kate will stay over at Y/n’s apartment, but with her apartment finally being fully remodeled after it caught fire it gave Y/n an opportunity to stay over there more. With Kate staying over at her place most of the time Y/n had gotten used to making dinner for the both of them. So when Kate came home from a mission Y/n started looking through what to cook with as she usually would. 

Y/n hollers looking through the fridge, “Kate what do you want for dinner?!” Kate quickly jogs downstairs meeting Y/n at the fridge taking something out of the freezer. She shrugs, “I’m fine with anything.” Y/n huffs still staring inside the fridge, “There’s not much to cook with when’s the last time you went grocery shopping?” 

Kate shrugs again giving a sheepish grin, “I don’t know. Why don’t we just order something tonight?” Sighing Y/n closes the fridge door leaning against it and looks at Kate. “I don’t really feel like take out though.” Kate looks at the makeshift ice pack she had pressed against her side holding it up to Y/n with a grin. 

“We could heat up these pizza rolls then.” A small grin tickles up on Y/n’s lips, “What do you even cook here there’s practically nothing in the fridge.” Kate scratches the back of her head stammering, “I don’t really know how to cook, to be honest.” 

Y/n’s grin fades as she looks more confused. “You do know how to cook though, you’ve made dinner before I come home from missions a few times.” Kate laughs awkwardly, “Uh, yeah. About that. Those times I cooked were just the food I ordered. I’d just put it in the pots and pans then put the containers and bags in the dumpster.” 

Giggling Y/n similes wide, “Kate, my love. You are twenty-two. How do you not know how to cook for yourself? Have you just been living off frozen foods?” Kate groans in embarrassment. Walking over to one of the shelves in the kitchen though Kate grabs a box of mac and cheese. 

“I can make this! I’m great at making this.” Kate shakes the box in Y/n’s face in a playful victory but Y/n just takes it from her placing it on the nearby countertop. “Congrats Ms. Bishop you can boil water.” Kate rolls her eyes at Y/n’s sarcasm, “Ms. Bishop is my Mom’s thing.”

Y/n shakes her head, “Whatever. Put a jacket on though.” Grabbing her own jacket Y/n stands near the door while Kate just looks confused crossing her arms. “And why exactly am I gonna put my jacket on?” Going up to Kate Y/n takes her by one of her arms pulling her closer to the door. 

“We’re gonna go grocery shopping so we can make dinner together.” Kate just groans again making Y/n toss a jacket at her. “Stop being a brat and let's go Kate. There’s a mini grocery store in walking distance from here.” Reluctantly Kate puts on her jacket following Y/n out the door after putting Lucky on a leash to come with them. 

// 

Making it to the grocery store Kate watches and Y/n carefully selects different vegetables putting them in a plastic bag. Grabbing a separate bag she then watches Y/n put different fruits in the bag. 

“What recipe did you choose exactly that requires blueberries?” Y/n shakes her head giving Kate a ‘are you stupid look’. “Kate. You barely have anything in your fridge. We’re grocery shopping in general. And you’re paying by the way.” 

Kate’s eyes go wide in shock, “Alright fine. But I’m gonna go get a frozen pizza then for later.” Hearing the word pizza Lucky immediately barks in agreement making Y/n stare daggers at the dog and her pizza-loving girlfriend. Kate awkwardly fake coughs then shrugs, “Or I could just not do that, that’s cool too.”  

Looking through the meat section for the main course for that night's dinner Lucky steals a steak on the lower shelf nearly pulling Kate away with him. Managing to stay in the same spot Y/n takes the steak from Lucky adding it to the other meats with the groceries.  

“Y’know you spoil him too much Y/n?” Kate smiles as they make their way to the cash register. Y/n simply rolls her eyes at the woman, “Like you, we never spoiled.” 

//

Finally making it back to the apartment Y/n lays out all the vegetables and meat that will be used in the dinner for the night while Kate finishes stocking up the fridge. As Kate finishes up stocking the fridge Y/n sets down a thick paper towel with some carrots and a sharp, and obviously unused kitchen knife right next to it. 

“Okay, Kate, your first lesson in learning how to cook is one of the simpler ones. Learning how to chop vegetables.” Y/n holds onto Kate’s hands in the right positions from behind showing her how to chop properly. Kate smiles to herself, “This would probably be more romantic if you were taller than me.” 

Y/n scoffs immediately letting go of Kate's hands. “You have like one inch on me Bishop.” Kate rolls her eyes laughing as Y/n starts searing the meat. Everything goes smoothly for the moment. Kate cuts the vegetables as Y/n takes care of everything on the stove. 

Or that is up until the point Y/n hears a quiet “Dammit” from Kate’s direction. “What’s up, Kate?” Y/n asks not shifting her gaze away from the stove. “I accidentally cut myself a little."  She hears Kate a lot more clearly this time turning around she turns Kate slightly to see the damage. 

Looking at her hand, saying I cut myself a little would be an understatement. The cut started at the top knuckle of her thumb going down to the bottom of her hand. “Kate! Oh my god, you’re gonna need stitches.” 

Grabbing a stray dish towel Y/n presses it against the cut putting Kate’s other hand on top of it to keep the pressure as she left to grab cash from her wallet for a taxi. “Baby it’s not that bad.” Kate tries to laugh through the pain of the cut. 

Y/n looks at her worried but also confused, “Kate, do you know how to do stitches on yourself?” Kate stutters bleeding through the rag, “Uh, no. But-” Y/n throws her hands up in the air pulling Kate to the door. “Well I don’t know how to do stitches in general so let's go.” 

As Lucky starts to follow Y/n in a panic tells him to stay rather aggressively. Kate gives the dog a quick pout before whispering to the dog, “I’m sorry Lucky! Your Mommy’s crazy.” 

Making it out of the apartment building Y/n hails down a taxi making sure Kate gets in safely first before her. “Can you take us to the nearest emergency room please sir?” The man gives a quick nod noticing the bloody rag on Kate's hand. 

It took about ten minutes to get to an emergency room, but once the women at the check-in desk say Kate was bleeding through the dishtowel she immediately got the two of you to see someone. After the doctor finished cleaning the cut she started stitching it up. 

Kate manages to look over at Y/n with a huge grin, “Hey, Baby?” Y/n looks at her with a tired smile, “What’s up?” 

“You still not in the mood for something else? Take out, maybe?” 

“Yeah, takeout actually sounds good right now.”

[raisedbythetv89]

Kristen is literally describing how she used to make peanut butter, whipped cream, blueberry bowls and the way Jason is looking at her while she does is making me psychotic

GIVE THEM ALL PLUS MAC BACK TO ME YOU COWARDS😭 AND STOP WITH ALL THE NOIR GARBAGE ROBERT.

Veronica Mars should be bordering camp at all times you made the new sheriff DAN LAMB aka Don Lamb’s “evil brother” that is RIDICULOUS and Weevil says to Chardo “You’re out. Out of the club…. out of my life” the most cartoonish line you could ever have a gang member utter 😭

Basically just start season 5 with Veronica waking up from the bad dream that was season 4 and try again and stick to season 1 vibes please and thank you because I need them all back together and I need Jason and us to have Logan back 😭

[hychlorions]

cake 😎👍

problem: can't figure out how to draw the whipped cream on a chuunosuke cake

solution: blender it 😎👍

[vicvinegarandhughhoney]

Dennis writes a letter 💌

(My fic for @its-always-ziney-in-philadelphia 's Valentine's Day zine)

Read here on AO3, here for the full zine, or below the cut!

It starts with a box of chocolates, as all romantic gestures that Dennis has read about do. He buys them from this fancy place in Rittenhouse Square that charges an extra five bucks for gift wrap, though he manages to charm the guy behind the counter into waiving it and walks out of there only twenty bucks lighter. 

Once home, he attaches a tag to the box- For Mac, from Dennis- and stands back to admire his work. He places the box in the kitchen for Mac to find when he gets there, at which point Dennis is sure Mac will throw himself at his feet with words of praise for his boyfriend’s gesture. Plus, this is only the first step of his grand plan for Valentine’s Day, the entirety of which involves far more than just chocolate. He is going to blow. Mac’s. mind. 

At least, this is the way Dennis envisions things going. 

How it actually goes?

“Oh, sweet, Den! That’s so cool!”

Dennis tries not to let the disappointment show on his face at his roommate’s lacklustre reaction to what he is sure amounts to a proper gesture of affection... right? Every website he scoured told him that there was no clearer message of affection than a box of chocolates on Valentine’s, and yet Mac only claps him on the back and walks off with them after Dennis humbly presents his offering. Like it was nothing more than a bag of chips or a takeaway pizza. 

He stands there in the kitchen for a few seconds after he hears the door to Mac’s room close, blinking as his brain short circuits. 

What the flying fuck is he doing wrong?

His next attempt at proving his love for Mac according to the five-step plan Dennis has constructed involves breakfast in bed, a true staple of the romantic flicks the two of them used to (platonically) watch every so often before the themes became too confronting. He wakes up bright and early on the morning of February 14th and sets to work on his creation in the kitchen while Mac remains asleep. It’s not a simple affair, either- there’s bacon to be cooked, and eggs, and pancakes dotted with blueberries that Dennis very nearly burns himself trying to flip.

Cooking isn’t something he does very often, after all. It’s a little harder than he anticipates. 

Still, he manages to arrange the plate perfectly, even the side toast is the exact shade of golden brown that he knows Mac likes. Any darker, and Mac says the carbon makes the bread toxic. Dennis isn’t quite sure that’s true, but he’s not going to risk serving Mac poison on Valentine’s Day of all days. 

He’s just about to pick up the tray and turn around when he hears Mac’s door open. His stomach drops. 

No. No. Get back in there, Ronald McDonald, or so help me God I’m going to-

“Den! You’re up early.”

Dennis wheels around to face him, cheeks aglow. “Uh, Mac- yeah, I was just- I was just making you breakfast.”

Mac stretches in his doorway, though one hand still remains at his side- a hand that Dennis soon realises is holding a gym bag. 

“That’s nice of you, dude, but I’m heading to the gym. You made some for yourself too, right?”

Dennis glances back at the worktop, though he’s not quite sure why. He knows that he didn’t make himself any, because of course he didn’t. Breakfast isn’t his thing. 

“Uh, yeah, I...”

“Sweet. I’ll see you around later, alright?” Mac wanders over to Dennis and presses a kiss to his cheek, eyes moving briefly to the tray. “Hah. Cool. Looks almost like a smiley face.”

Dennis watches him leave with a growing pit in his stomach, and barely forces out a fake chuckle at the ‘coincidence’, that tapers off the moment the door to the apartment closes. He picks up the tray and curls his lip at the ridiculous face which stares back at him, almost taunting, and the heart shaped toast he’d carefully cut out with a knife. 

He throws the whole thing directly in the trash. 

**

The bar is empty when Dennis arrives. Mac’s still at the gym, Dee’s probably still in bed, and Charlie and Frank are probably fucking around playing some Valentine’s version of NightCrawlers. 

It doesn’t matter, though. Dennis is glad that he’s alone because it means he can place step 3 of his Grand Valentine’s Day Plan right on top of the bar ready for when Mac enters- a little vase of flowers, each one picked out especially for the occasion. He’d endured the allergen hell that was the florists for Mac, and even now the pollen makes his nostrils itch, yet he doesn’t consider abandoning his plan for a second. The chocolates and the breakfast in bed were missteps. This will prove to Mac just how he feels. It’s written there, spelled out in the petals. 

Baby’s breath symbolising everlasting affection. Bluebells for humility. Pink Camellia for longing. Daisies for loyalty. Heliotrope for devotion. 

Red Chrysanthemums- I love you. 

He spends a few moments longer arranging them to look their best, then slips a little note underneath the vase for Mac to see once he picks them up. The action means he has to muffle a few sneezes into his elbow, but it’s worth it. 

Tired from his early morning escapades (nobreakfastnobreakfastnobreakfast), he pulls himself into the back room and flops down onto the desk chair. The moment he closes his eyes, he falls asleep. 

When he wakes, he can hear footsteps and conversation outside, and his pulse leaps at the realisation that it means Mac has discovered his gesture. He stands up and tugs nervously at the fingers of his right hand, then opens the door to the main bar. This is it. This is his chance to explain what each flower means, and in doing so assure Mac that though he may not have said it in words yet, he’s said it in petals. He loves him. 

The moment Dennis turns to the spot where the flowers should be, though, his stomach sinks. They’re not there. 

He can do nothing but stand there for a few seconds, brain short-circuiting as he tries to figure out what could have possibly occurred to displace his gift, when he sees Mac pop up from behind the bar, apparently having been crouched under there cleaning a soda pipe. 

“Hey Den! You feeling okay?”

Dennis doesn’t know whether the question is posed because of his impromptu nap or the way the light has probably faded from his eyes, but it doesn’t matter. He clears his throat and replies,

“What happened to the flowers on the bar?”

Mac’s expression morphs into one of understanding- or, at least, a false sense of understanding, given Dennis knows exactly what he’s going to allude to. 

“Ah, right, of course! See, I knew they were going to give your allergies trouble, which they obviously have- sorry dude, I don’t know who put them there- so I got Dee to throw them out the back.” He grins, so assured of his good deed that he looks like a proud puppy after completing his first successful trick. 

Dennis, meanwhile, feels the familiar weight of disappointment heavy on his shoulders. 

“Ah... cool. Right. I’m... I’m gonna go outside for a smoke. Don’t wait up for me.”

Mac makes a slightly confused face, but lets Dennis trudge to the back anyway. Once outside, it  doesn’t take long for the latter to see the bunch of flowers sticking out of the trash can, their stems bent, a few errant petals scattered across the ground. Dennis’ fists curl up with frustration. He wanders over to his ruined gift and shoves it a little further into the trash, a low growl building in his throat when it refuses to goddamn go down. Stupid fucking idea. Stupid fucking gift. Stupid fucking Valentine’s Day. Stupid fucking-

“Dennis?”

Oh. Fantastic. The last person he wants to see right now is here. 

He sighs, rolling his shoulders, and doesn’t turn around until he’s convinced he’s not about to let how upset he is show. “What do you want, Dee?”

She’s standing just outside the back entrance to Paddy’s, brows creased with almost concern. “Is this about the flowers you put out for Mac?”

Dennis’ ears flush so red he can feel their temperature rise. He hates being a twin sometimes. 

“What do you care?” he snarls. 

She doesn’t retreat beneath his anger. Never has. Instead, she merely sighs, holding a little scrap of paper aloft that Dennis recognises with a pang of dread. “I found this underneath the vase while I was picking it up to throw out.”

Her brother says nothing. What can he say?

“You were inviting him for dinner? On Valentine’s?”

It doesn’t sound like she’s mocking him, but his own vulnerability being parroted back at him hurts all the same so he marches forward, snatching the note from her grasp before wheeling back around and pacing in front of the dumpsters. “Just- just fuck off, alright, Dee? I’m not in the mood.”

“Well, tough shit, dickbag. You’re my brother. Unfortunately, whether you like it or not, I’ve become wrapped up in this love affair between you and Mac, and somehow the fact that you’re asking him out on a date for Valentine’s is almost touching to me... Y’know, Mac didn’t see the note, Den.” Despite himself, Dennis freezes. “He saw the flowers, that’s all, and the only reason he got rid of those was because he thought someone else left them in there, and he was worried they were going to set your allergies off.” 

Dee gives him a once-over, wrinkling her nose at the redness she seems to perceive in his. “Apparently for good reason.”

Dennis rolls his eyes. 

“Look, what I’m saying is he didn’t do this maliciously. In fact, it was the opposite. He was trying to look out for you.”

“Yeah, well, I wish he’d open his goddamn eyes for once!” Dennis growls, still pacing like a caged tiger. “I don’t get it, Dee. I’m doing everything that I’m supposed to do.”

“Everything you’re... supposed to?”

Dennis pauses, looking at her as though she only has half a brain. Throws up his hands in exasperation. “Yeah! I followed all the stupid steps on these stupid websites to show him that I care about him, and for what? The stupid idiot doesn’t even notice!”

He’s aware that he’s said ‘stupid’ way too many times, but he’s angry, and the coherence in his head evaporates before it can reach his lips. Dee doesn’t seem phased by his outburst in the least. 

“Look,” she says, far too gentle for comfort. “Have you ever wondered why he doesn’t notice these things?”

Dennis quirks a brow. Waits for her to do what she’s never done before, and enlighten him. 

“Alright, let’s break it down. It won’t take long. Who, in Mac’s life, has ever shown him proper affection?”

The question catches him so off guard that the first reaction Dennis has is to chuckle. That’s ridiculous. Of course Mac has... he’s... A cool flood of realisation washes over him like the sweat of a bad dream. The mirth fades from his features, and his arms fall limply to his sides. Oh. 

Nobody.

Dee smiles a little. “Get it now?”

Dennis swallows and looks her in the eyes with the sincerest expression he’s ever mustered. “So- so what the fuck do I do then? How am I supposed to show affection to a guy who doesn’t even know what that looks like?”

“How did we show each other, Den? Back when we were kids?”

He feels his features soften, and as he looks at his twin sister, he’s half compelled to hug her. 

Of course. 

“Thank you.” He murmurs. 

Dee only nods towards the exit of the alley. “Yeah. I know. Go do what you gotta do, asshole. I’ll tell Mac to dress pretty for his date tonight, alright?”

**

For once, Dennis is sat in Guigino’s before Mac arrives, his leg bouncing up and down beneath the best table in the restaurant (far from any fans or kitchen doors). He’s checked his appearance in his compact mirror ten times already, but that doesn’t stop him from hazarding another quick look while the coast is clear. 

Usually, he’s only dressed in a shirt and pants- perhaps a little more formal than his day-to-day attire, but nothing to write home about. Tonight, however, he’s jazzed it up with a proper suit jacket and matching pants, plus a pocket square that perfectly resembles the shade of his shirt. His hair is styled in that carefully constructed muss of curls which is so particular to His Look™ at the moment. He’s wearing Mac’s favourite cologne. He’s wearing just a touch of mascara. He’s wearing the most nervous expression he’s ever sported in his life. 

There’s no fanfare when Mac walks in, as much as Dennis would’ve liked that, but it seems to play in his head regardless, because damn. Mac. Looks. Good. 

Evidently, he got Dee’s memo about dressing fancy, and for once he’s ditched the monthly dinner polo in favour of an actual dress shirt, the sleeves rolled up to his elbows accentuating the muscles of his arms. His hair isn’t gelled, and Dennis thinks the slightly fluffy look he’s rocking is hot as shit. It reminds him of when times were a little bit simpler. Back when labels were things you put on diagrams instead of complicated relationships with your roommate. 

Still, as Mac wanders towards the table, a smile lighting up his expression like summer’s sunshine, Dennis finds himself somewhat glad that things have changed. 

Because tonight, unlike twenty years ago, Mac is his boyfriend. 

“Hey.” Dennis greets, standing up to meet him, cheeks uncharacteristically flushed. 

Mac grins. “Uh, hi- wow, dude, you look good.”

Despite how much it makes him want to puff out his chest like a proud little robin, Dennis restrains himself and merely smiles back. “So do you, babe.”

Babe. The word feels almost unfamiliar on his tongue when used for Mac, given that they’ve spent much of their adult lives calling each other ‘dude’ or ‘bro.’ Still, Dennis needs to show Mac that he’s serious about all that romance shit. If that means peppering in a few pet names to get him primed, count him in. 

They sit down, and after ordering and receiving their food, the conversation flows almost like usual. Dennis tries to forget that he was ever frustrated at Mac for missing the overt gestures he was making, and focuses instead on just how much he’s missed sitting down like this and catching up. It may have only been a few days in reality, but given that Dennis’ mind has been fixed on making plans instead of the recipient of them (his boyfriend), it feels like far longer. 

Eventually, they finish their meal, and usually it would be time for them to start getting ready to leave. Tonight, though? Tonight, Dennis holds out a hand when Mac stands up, and bids him sit down a little longer. 

“I... I wanted to... to give you something.” He says. “For Valentine’s Day.”

And with this, he removes a piece of paper from his pocket, and hands it to Mac. The contents are still fresh in his mind from the hours he spent agonizing over each word, and he hears them in his head while he glances up every so often at Mac’s eyes gliding along the page.  

Mac,

For the last few weeks I’ve been trying to think of what to do for today. I spent hours researching romantic gestures online, and I tried to enact them- but I’d failed to realise that what we have is different from the relationships in tabloids and novels. We’re real, Mac. It’s not always as simple as the movies. 

I told Dee about this (I know, but please hear me out) and she reminded me of something we used to do when we were kids, and Mom and Dad wouldn’t let us talk to each other for some punishment or other. We used to write letters. It started as a necessary tactic to skirt around the rules and communicate, but it turned out to be easier expressing things in a letter than saying them out loud, so I thought I’d do the same thing here. 

Here goes...

I love you, Mac. There it is in writing, so you can show it to me whenever you piss me off with your Borat impressions and excessive hair gel. Because it’ll still be true. I love you. 

It’s not much of a Valentine’s gift, but it’s the one thing I want to give you more than anything, now until the end of time. 

Yours always,

Den. 

Dennis spends the whole duration of the letter tugging on his earlobe, eyes fixed on the white tablecloth. The prospect of Mac recoiling at this rare expression of vulnerability is terrifying. Even now, Frank’s denunciations of anything that made his son seem like a ‘nancy boy’ echo in his mind, and it takes that repetitive tugging to keep himself from reaching over and setting the evidence of feelings alight by the flame of the candle on the table. 

But then Mac reaches over, and slowly, gently, takes Dennis’ free hand. Dennis looks up. 

He doesn’t even need to wait to hear Mac say it- it’s written in his eyes just as clearly as on the paper in his hand. 

Love. 

And Dennis’ lip trembles beneath the weight of it. 

[mosquito-queen]

so soft/painful Yelena POV Bishova

Yelena can't cook. She's a weapon. She's a monster (she tells herself). Her "dinner" most nights of her life was a ration bar if it was anything. She knows how to filet a man's flesh with a knife, not a pork loin. She knows WHAT a PB&J is. Can she make one? Barely. The bread is half shredded from the knife and the jelly isn't spreading right. The box mac and cheese is only saved by the instructions on the package.

Kate never really learned to cook, but she can make basics. Can of soup, pack of ramen, box of mac and cheese. Yelena adores it all. She hates it all. Why is Kate taking care of someone so broken? Why is Kate kissing her and loving her? Why is Kate holding her close in bed? Why is Kate inviting her to parties at college?

Yelena hates it. She loves it. She wants to hide and never be found. She wants to bury her face in Kate's chest and listen to that steady heartbeat for days. She wants to never taste food again. She wants to go on a rampage through the food trucks of New York with Kate and try everything twice.

Yelena's scared. She's happy. She's terrified. She's in love. She's human. She's a monster.

STOP I LOVE THIS. thank you <3 i’m going to add:

yelena’s hand freezes when she goes to pour dry kibble into the bowls for lucky and fanny. god, the food in the red room sometimes looked just like this. her eyes gloss over. thinks she was a dog in a past life - this life - chained in a basement, beat when she barked and beat when she forgot to bite. her life revolved on the hand that opened the door to give her slim rations. sit, down, roll over, heel.

kate comes home to a crime scene in the kitchen: brown paper bags, stained newspapers, blood, a knife, eggshells… blueberries? a full bag of dog food peaking out from the trash.

“yelena?”

yelena’s back is to her, she’s scrubbing her hands in the sink. meticulous.

kate takes out her earbuds, forgets she’s too sweaty from the run to be touching someone, and lets her fingers ghost across yelena’s arm.

she tries again: “yelena?”

yelena stops scrubbing. the water still runs. she exhales, slowly turns to look at kate, blinking the frenzied panic out of her eyes, “i don’t want them to - i want - no more dry food. okay?”

it takes kate a few moments to figure out what she’s talking about, sees the dog bowls in the drying rack, “oh, yeah, okay. that’s okay. we can do that.”

“and a yard. with their own door.”

“in new york city?” kate is turning off the water, softly pulling yelena’s hands out of the sink and into a towel. she’s drying off water and hurt and panic and memories that should only be nightmares.

yelena repeats: “their own door,” watching kate squeeze the dish towel up her arms and back down. she feels herself returning, feels like she’s waking up again.

“alright, i’m sure there’s something.” she glances over to where the two dogs are sprawled out in the living room, “but if they’re getting real food, we need to figure out something better for us than living off ravioli and mac and cheese.”

and that’s how they find themselves taking a cooking class, where kate learns yelena used to have family dinners. kate is hellbent on figuring out how to recreate yelena’s favorite meal. and when kate finally, painstakingly cooks it as a surprise, yelena cries.

she cries and kate thinks it’s because she ruined it, starts apologizing, her heart dropping. she fucked it up. but yelena is furiously shaking her head, pulling kate into a hug, pulling kate into a love that outshines the sun. and kate sinks into it, holds her tighter, says something yelena didn’t know she needed: “let me take care of you.”

[demi-gods-posts]

Hypnos Camper x Hermes Camper

Sleepy traveler

(Camper A = Hypnos)

(Camper B = Hermes)

Camper B had just arrived back from a long quest with advice from their father. Being very tired after their long trip of slaying monsters and running around the country with their saytr protector.

“Cmon honey please get up it’s dinner time” The child of the sleep god said, trying to urge their partner out of the confines of their bunk bed in the Hermes Cabin. Only being met with annoyed grumbles and their back turned to them.

“Nooo.. all I want to do is sleep!!” They complained, their back aching from all the manual labor they had put in these last few days.

The Hypnos child mumbled something and groaned, “fine, you can stay here. At least eat something though. Please?” Their lover rolled over in bed and glared at them, “get me a few granola bars and some water please.. I don’t think I can get up.. I feel like jello..” they mumbled and looked away, bashful for having to ask their partner to get them something. As being the child of a traveling and messenger god usually meant they got stuff for other people.

The child of dreams nodded and left the cabin to search for snacks for their favorite little thief. Gathering a few different flavors of granola bar and 2 bottles of water. Arriving back at the cabin and sitting on the edge of their bed. “Here honey, I got you a strawberry one, blueberry, normal, and a chocolate one.” They said and gently stroked their hair.

“Thank you..” they hummed and sat up a bit to open one of the packages, choosing to open the strawberry one. Taking a bite out of it and looking back to their lover, “you just gonna watch me eat or something?” They asked, “mmm maybe, but I need to go get some dinner before Percy takes the last of the mac and cheese.” They joked and the Hermes kid laughed. “Yeah go ahead and get your dinner, come here once you’re done okay?” They asked and chuckled softly.

“I will, you can count on it.” They replied and left the cabin.

[badteavee]

Happy birthday , by the way.

Tws / Cws : Suicidal Thoughts / Suicidal Ideation , just shitty mental health in general

Genre : Angst + Fluff

Word count : 1,074

Parings : Jeremy Heere x Michael Mell

Note : This is outside of my usual content but I love bmc and it’s super easy to project onto Michael Mell

11:30pm.

Most knew that Michael wasn’t the most stable individual , not by choice , it was just obvious. Almost weekly if not daily counselor visits , zoning out in class , starting to grey at 15 , barely functioning if he wasn’t high out of his mind. No one was more aware of it than Michael himself. Now he sat in his bedroom , staring at the wall because he couldn’t bring himself to look at his phone. He didn’t want to look at the time again , even if Jeremy texted , he couldn’t handle seeing how close it was to midnight. It’s too close to his birthday.

Ding.

Jeremy’s probably confirming that he’s on his way or he’s here. If he was , one of Michael’s moms could let him in.

11:42pm.

Jeremy slowly opened Michael’s door , a small plastic bag in one hand and a shitty blueberry muffin from Seven Eleven in the other. He knows Michael hasn’t been big on his birthday for a couple of years now but he didn’t like the thought of not getting him anything so he always got something small.

He met the taller’s eye as he set the goods on the side table , he obviously hadn’t slept the night before , his nails were halfway peeled , hang nails torn off. He won’t mention any of it , Michael barely was in a condition to talk , let alone about this.

11:44pm.

Jeremy saw how Michael turned away when he checked his phone , that was his mistake , he should be used to not checking until it was at least 1 am. He took his and Michael’s phones and put them in a drawer , grabbing the wii remotes. He handed one to Michael and sat back down , setting the tv up to play Super Mario Bros.

Michael considered declining , he didn’t feel like he could distract himself this year , he knew this was his best bet to not feel the existentialism however.

11:56pm.

Michael found himself pleasantly distracted , he should’ve known. Jeremy has known how to distract him since diapers. Every time loading takes a little too long or he has to wait for Jeremy to win for them , he can feel it clawing at the back of his mind. <i>It’s getting close to midnight.</i> he thinks. The game starts again and he feels it fade , being replaced by the competitive nature he definitely got from one of his moms.

It was game , wait , dread , game , repeat. It was a distressing cycle but distracting enough for him not to spiral. That’s all that mattered to the both of them.

11:59pm.

Jeremy quickly checked his watch while Michael was distracted , looking back up at the boy yelling at the game for something that was entirely his fault. He smiled , knowing he did his job correctly. He rolled his hoodie sleeve back up. “You know that was totally your fault , right ?”

“It was the controller ! It’s old and the buttons don’t work !”

“Excuses.”

Michael sighed , exasperated , while Jeremy laughed at his dramatics.

12:03am.

Jeremy spotted one of Michael’s moms , Rosemary , cracking open the door to quietly check in. He gave her a smile and subtle thumbs up that Michael was too busy singing along to the AC/DC vinyl he’d put on when he decided it was too quiet to notice. Rosemary grinned , slinking in to hand the boys the bowls of mac and cheese she usually made when they stayed up late.

“You boys don’t stay up too late now.” She ruffled Michael’s hair on her way back to the door , to which Michael groaned , trying to get his hair back to normal while still dancing in his seat.

“I’ll make sure he goes to sleep soon , Mrs. Mell.”

“Thank you , Jeremy.”

1:02am.

The boys had winded down by now , Michael putting on some documentary about dolphins , knowing that Jeremy had no say in the matter of what they watched. The shorter rolled his eyes , choosing to check his watch again.

In years passed , this would usually be the time he’d retrieve their phones and wish Michael a happy birthday but he knew better than to do that this year. Michael never actually thought he’d make it to 17 , something he’d only admitted once to Jeremy but explained a lot about his attitude towards birthday celebration. Every other year since he turned 13 was a possible last year but this one , now , was proof that he did make it. It’s something he should be proud of , it’s definitely something Jeremy and his moms were , but it felt weird.

Living passed what you were supposed to was an interesting experience , it felt numbing knowing you now had to plan your life , but it also was a relief. It’s nice to know you can prove yourself wrong.

Michael’s not thinking about any of that though , thanks to Jeremy , who grabbed the muffin and bag before cuddling into his best friend’s side. He held them just in case Michael didn’t want to take them just yet but he surprisingly took the small bag from him.

There were just a few new pins and patches for his jacket in there , some retro patches Jeremy found off eBay and Bob Marley pins. Michael smiled , hugging the other closer. “Thank you , Jerem..”

Jeremy returned the smile , pecking his cheek. “Of course , Micha.” He held up the muffin. “Wanna split it ?” The taller nodded , both of them trying to split the pastry best they could. It kept breaking off in smaller pieces or just crumbling all together so they gave up after about thirty seconds , resigning to just eating the pieces and taking bites from their halves.

1:53am.

Rosemary came by to check in once more before she joined her wife in bed , slowly opening the door to see them slumped against each other , fast asleep with Michael snoring into Jeremy’s hair. She softly crept in to turn off the record player and restart the documentary that autoplayed.

She paused to look through the drawer , taking the boy’s phones out. She caught a glimpse of Michael’s notifications as she did , multiple messages from him and Jeremy’s new friends all wishing him a happy birthday with stupid and excessive emoji combinations. She smiled and left the phones on the bedside table , leaning over the bed to kiss Michael’s forehead. “Happy birthday , baby..” She whispered before leaving the boys to sleep , she’ll give Michael his gifts in the morning.

[paldean-sandwich-rater]

A sandwich.

It contains ice cream, whipped cream, sponge cake, meat balls, broccoli, pineapple, strawberries, tomatoes, lettuce, rice, noodles, mac and cheese, bacon, beef jerky, dried fish, seaweed, one of every Pokemon berry, jam, olive oil, lotus, dragon fruit, ravioli, ramen, tempura, teriyaki chicken, macaroons, escargots, mint, pepper, salt, sugar, croquettes, pickles, apples, avocados, sausages, bell peppers, grapes, pizza, a donut, cheese, more cheese, even more cheese, mushrooms, mustard, olives, a fried egg, a scrambled egg, blueberries, a poached egg, chawanmushi, a red bean bun, mochi, bbq sauce, chicken nuggets, french fries, takoyaki, pancakes, mackerel, salmon, coffee beans, spinach, a tiny bit of corn cream soup, ramensanga, fettucine alfredo, a plain bagel, pretzels, chocolate chip cookies, sweet potato, yam, potato, scallions, scallops, squid, crab stick, fish balls, fish cakes, oyster sauce, silken tofu, barley, cereal, paprika, oysters, red snapper, sea bass, plums, bean sprouts, garlic, string cheese, camembert, swiss cheese, mozzarella, parmesan cheese, yogurt, brinjal, a macdonald’s happy meal (without the toy and the packaging of course), truffles, caviar, tapioca balls, fried chicken, century eggs, cake sprinkles, dark chocolate, milk chocolate, white chocolate, milk tea (just a tinge), coffee (also a tinge), pudding, pumpkin, honey, mutton, mashed potatoes, bananas, icelandic fermented shark that they bury in the ground for months, raisins, dried mangoes, a drop of water, jelly, nata de coco, prunes, roasted pork, rosemary, bee pollen, peas, deer meat, rabbit meat, fish maw, ham, turkey, m&ms, chub, fufu, watermelon, winter melon, rock melon, coffee jelly, cacao, carrots, blueberries, black tea, dumplings, carrot cake, beetroot, purple cabbage, corn, celery, edamame, red beans, black beans, green beans, kidney beans, cashews, peanuts, pecans, sunflower seeds, walnuts, chickpeas, almonds, daikon, MSG, tamales, anchovies, tabbouleh, lions mane mushroom, chicken of the woods, kelp, octopus, durian, kimchi, crème fraîche, popcorn, cotton candy, everything bagel seasoning, capers, pears, marinara sauce, bittercress, butter cream, every single iteration of galarian curry, sushi, sashimi, kale and a very very specific ramen bowl (without the actual bowl) from a very particular shop located in Iwatodai.

And the top and bottom buns are somehow made from 50 different kinds of bread in a checker box pattern.

It comes with a picture.

Ingredients: I am not typing all of that out again. What the fuck.

Smell: You’ve taken an entire food court’s worth of food and made it into a sandwich. This isn’t even possible. Why am I considering this. 3/5

Taste: How do you eat this. 2/5

Texture: You get like 5 different foods every bite. This is not balanced. There is no harmony. This sandwich is the embodiment of disorder and chaos. 1/5

Presentation: The fact that this even looks sandwich adjacent is a fucking miracle. You don’t get full points though. Because I don’t like you. 3/5

Would Chunk Eat It?: He would eat maybe 1/50th of it. So no. 1/5

Final Score: 2/5

Critic’s Notes: Why would you waste this much food. Just host a party. Donate it. Something fucking anything I am begging at this point.

[goth-oatmilk-latte]

i have friends who work at ulta and sephora who talk about how annoyin it is that 10 yr olds are comin in

but like imma be real, this generations 10 yr olds looking for drunk elephant are my generation looking for the sparkly lipglosses and frosted eyeshadows or the blackest liner to do a smokey eye or body glitter in some capacity.

yeah its annoying but ur really gonna sit here and tell me that as a preteen you didnt annoy some poor min wage worker asking for some glittery lipgloss or a glitter lotion or a frosted eyeshadow? come on be so fucking for real rn. i had friends at 11 or 12 who were going to MAC counters and trying every shimmer shadow out and destroying displays along the way. hell im guilty of ripping apart a sephora lip gloss display to find the last benefit blueberry glitter gloss.

our generation isnt any better, we're just adults now instead of the kids watching it.

[the-amber-raven]

Snippet Sunday

It's just past midnight here, so it is technically Sunday... and when I wake up it will be all about NYE and I have no faith that I'll have time to post so doing it before bed! It's been a hell of a crazy and kind of awful few weeks quite frankly, but I'm proud of myself for completing the first chapter of the 6b fic before the end of year.

I haven't done one in a while, so have a slightly longer snippet where Bobby gets some initial inklings that Buck is perhaps more involved in the Diaz family than he realised:

--

“Are you sure you don’t want to make yourself one, Buckaroo? There really is a perfectly good room for you to stay in.” 

“Bobby said he’d make blueberry pancakes for breakfast,” Harry added enthusiastically. “And I’m working on getting him to do his mac and cheese for dinner!” 

“That does sound amazing, but I need to pick Christopher up from his party tonight so I definitely can’t,” Buck said apologetically. He was genuinely regretful, because the idea of waking up to Bobby’s pancakes and then maybe helping him bake mac and cheese while Athena and Harry hovered near them as they caught up and unpacked Harry’s things was a pretty amazing fantasy that he would have enjoyed indulging in. 

“Christopher?” Bobby said sharply, startled and concerned. “Is everything alright with Eddie?” 

“Of course,” Buck replied, mystified as to what had made Bobby jump to that conclusion. “Eddie dropped him off, I just offered to do the pick-up."

"Eddie didn't feel comfortable driving at night...?" Bobby probed, mouth pressed together in worry. There was a brief period, right after his breakdown, where Eddie had avoided driving at night since he was anxious about potentially getting triggered by something so Buck supposed he could understand where Bobby's worry was coming from.

"No, nothing like that. It just didn't seem like there was much point in him going when I was planning to crash at Eddie's anyway."

Bobby didn't look any less concerned, so Buck expanded his explanation.

"I promised Chris that we could plan out our next zoo visit tomorrow. They’re offering koala photos at the moment plus there’s some new baby gibbons so we need to make some sacrifices and adjust our usual schedule.” 

Bobby opened his mouth, probably to ask for more detail because he now looked puzzled. 

However, Harry jumped in first, his eyes wide with wonder. “As in you can take a photo with a koala?”  

“You can take one holding a koala if you want.” Buck pulled out his phone, handing it over to Harry once he found the screenshot that he’d sent to Eddie which explained the experience and showed a sample photo. He angled it so that Bobby could also see the phone, wondering if maybe Bobby hadn’t been aware that the LA zoo had Australian native animals and that was why he was confused? 

--

Hope y'all have a Happy and Safe New Year's Eve! And may the muse be stronger than ever in 2024 ;)

[midnightfire830]

Because I haven’t done anything cyberpunk I’m a while, also bc I’m stalling for a drawing. Here’s the questers favorite types of junk food in cyberpunk (and IG any of my modern AUs)

Cuphead obviously likes anything sweet, especially lollipops. He doesn’t really care what flavor but he likes those mystery kinds that randomly pick for him; grape, and strawberry. But he also defaults to eating ravioli cups or cans if he needs a quick meal, or a snack. Or for comfort. Or if he’s just feeling it.

Mugman likes snacking on pokeys. His favorite flavor is regular chocolate and blueberry. Cuphead teases him about that relentlessly. “He likes blueberries so much it turned his nose blue” (A note from my friend @ireallylovepuppies101 ). Also, he really likes sour gummy candies. Like sour patch kids and sour fizzy skulls (I work at a Swedish candy store that last one might not make as much sense to my american friends).

Bendy has a bad habit of forgetting to eat when he’s stuck with a project (as does Holly) so he likes hot pockets. He doesn’t really have a favorite flavor, whatever he can grab at the corner store. He’ll usually eat these as a last minute meal if he forgets to eat dinner. It drives Cuphead INSANE. He also likes any kind of bacon flavored chips or pretzels.

Boris is the one in the workshop that actually remembers to eat. He often has to remind Bendy and Holly to actually eat if Cuphead isn’t there to remind him. Boris is kind of a sucker for Mac ‘n cheese cups or just regular Mac n’ cheese in the boxes. He likes to cut up hot dogs or little bits of ham and mix them in his Mac ‘n cheese for a little extra protein. He also makes sure if that is going to be his meal that he also eat some fruits or veggies with it.

Felix doesnt really eat junk food but he occasionally likes a good vanilla milkshake. He also enjoys chocolate biscuits and cookies. I tried looking up british chocolate cookie brands but I’m obviously not british so idk what’s good. But there was a thing called McVities Chocolate Digestives. I imagine he’d like the lemon drizzle flavor. He also likes Girl Scout cookies. If there’s someone selling them he’s buying their whole stock of cookies. He especially likes Samoa, Thin mints, and Lemonades. He doesn’t eat those a whole lot, they’re kind of special occasion things or comfort food. Whenever he’s feeling nostalgic.

Holly likes lollipops of course, preferring cherry and blue raspberry flavors. But really any flavor will do. But she also likes ramen! If you go into her section of the workshop where she codes you’ll see a lot of cup ‘o noodles cups everywhere. If she decides to cook ramen she likes to cook it with some egg and chopped up onions, carrots, celery, and potatoes to make it a bit more hearty and filling.

Alice doesn’t eat junk food that much. She does like marshmallows, especially s’mores or any kind of chocolate covered marshmallow. But she also likes donuts. >:) (for the people who read inky mystery you know that Holly scared Alice into thinking that eating donuts makes you a bad person.) So she only likes specific kinds of donuts. She loves apple fritters, long john donuts, and crullers because they don’t look like your average donuts. So she doesn’t realize those are actually donuts. She thinks they’re just regular weirdly shaped pastries. No one has the guts to tell her they’re actually donuts.

If you wanna hear other characters let me know!!!!