#< i have a mild case of flu

[nthflower]

Girlies I am dying send good vibes

[searenbound]

Guess who might have the flu?

[lectroart]

i just realized i havent mentioned this here yet. im 110% sick so art's gonna be slow for a bit

[milaek]

Hggghfghfgg more covid posting because hcjaklajf.

Just took a shower/bath in which I washed the dogs. I had pretty full energy when I began.

I am now completely exhausted. Like. In my day to day I struggle with chronic-fatigue-like symptoms but this is fuckin next level. I'm not just an eepy bitch I am like physically jello now.

Hwhaaaaat the fuckkkkkk.

[somethingaboutvampires]

[shadowtriovibes]

fever (what a lovely way to burn)

Pairing: Sebastian Sallow x f!MC

Word Count: 4.8k

Rating: M

Warnings: 18+, aged-up characters, friends to lovers, character with fever/illness, mild sensual content

Summary: request: "since you saved Sebastian from Azkaban, he has met you in the common room every morning and you have gone to breakfast together. One morning he isn't there so you go to his room looking for him to find him in bed, poorly."

“I’m disgusting,” he groans. “I can’t stop coughing, I’m sweating everywhere, I feel like I’m going to be sick but there’s nothing to–” He cuts himself off with several dry, pathetic coughs. “Here’s what we’re going to do,” you tell him firmly. “Ominis is going to go to class and come back this afternoon with some Muggle medicinals. In the meantime, I’m going to help you eat a bit of food and have a bath.” “N-no, absolutely not,” he stammers. “You think I want you seeing me like this any more than you already have?”

Monday, October 5, 1891

Even a month after the start of term, it’s unseasonably warm in the Highlands. The heat from the dog days of summer persists well into the arrival of autumn, permeating the ancient stone walls of the castle and settling like a thin layer of fog across Hogwarts’ students.

Professor Sharp’s N.E.W.T.s-level Potions class meets promptly at nine o’clock every morning. Despite the early time slot, the dungeon-level classroom starts to become warm rather quickly thanks to the heat of two dozen bodies and six potion stations, each with their flickering flames preheating the students’ pewter cauldrons.

Your little trio is usually the last to arrive from breakfast. Sebastian sidles up to the doorway just as Professor Sharp is preparing to close it, gallantly offering to hold it open for you and Ominis as you take your time sauntering down the hall, arms linked together and chatting happily about the latest gossip to have surfaced in the Great Hall.

Then you settle in at the potions table squarely in the middle of the classroom, which you’d unabashedly claimed at the start of term. (Ominis can hear Professor Sharp most clearly here, and Sebastian, as always, gets to remain the center of attention.)

Finally, with Ominis’ dictation quill hovering over his parchment, Professor Sharp begins his daily discourse.

“Dittany, as you’ll recall, is one of the most useful herbs for creating a wide range of healing draughts,” he explains, showing off a tendril of the fiercely pink plant clipped from Professor Garlick’s greenhouse just that morning. “Can anyone give me an example of one?”

“Wiggenweld Potion, sir,” Amit chimes in.

“Very good, Mister Thakkar,” Sharp replies with an approving nod. “Another?”

Adelaide Oakes timidly raises her hand. “Essence of Dittany, sir?”

“Well done, Miss Oakes,” he murmurs. “Though not as effective as a properly-brewed bottle of Wiggenweld, dittany on its own can be used to craft a powerful restorative tonic – especially useful in preventing the occurrence of scars. Five points to Hufflepuff.”

Then Professor Sharp glances around the room expectantly. “One more, perhaps?”

“Moustache paste, sir?” Sebastian mumbles under his breath, and you quickly elbow him in the side.

“What was that, Mister Sallow?” Professor Sharp drawls.

Sebastian bites the inside of his cheek. “Er, the Antidote to Common Poisons, perhaps?”

Professor Sharp levels Sebastian with a dubious look. “I’m afraid not. While dittany is a broadly useful herb, its powers are generally limited to healing, not curing. When considering its uses, think ‘paper cut,’ not ‘influenza.’”

You raise your hand and ask, “Sir, are there any potions that do cure illnesses?”

“Yes, in fact,” Professor Sharp answers. “The Pepperup Potion will quickly resolve any common colds or cases of the flu, with the enigmatic side effect of generating steam that will pour from your ears for hours on end.”

You wince a bit. “I suppose that’s worth being over a cold in a day.”

“I should think so,” he replies with a slight grin. “So has the majority of the wizarding world since the twelfth century.”

As Professor Sharp segues into a lecture on the history of healing potions, you pull out a piece of parchment and start to take down some notes.

“Sebastian,” you hiss. “What does Pepperup Potion taste like?”

“I wouldn’t know,” he says. “I’ve only had it once, and it was a decade ago.”

You frown. “Why’s that?”

“I can’t drink it,” Sebastian says simply. “I’m allergic to bicorn horn.”

You blink, surprised. “You’re… allergic? How did you even discover that about yourself?”

“Oh, it was gruesome,” Ominis chimes in gleefully.

Sebastian rolls his eyes. “Well, I had my suspicions as a child when my parents gave me Pepperup Potion and steam poured out of my ears, nose, and mouth for a full week. Simply suffering through the cold would have been better.”

“And then?” you prompt.

“Well… in our third year, Anne and I made some Polyjuice Potion,” Sebastian admits, glancing around furtively. “We wanted to see if we could attend our classes all day as each other without anyone noticing the difference.”

“And Polyjuice Potion has bicorn horn,” you surmise.

Ominis looks delighted. “They were both in the Hospital Wing for three days, stuck as half-formed versions of each other.”

You gasp in disbelief. “That sounds awful!”

“It was the one and only time in their lives they were truly identical!” Ominis crows. “‘Sebastianne,’ we called them.”

You can’t help but giggle at Ominis’ delight while Sebastian sulks.

“In any case,” Sebastian grumbles, “I can’t take Pepperup Potion anymore, but luckily I never get sick.”

“Really?” you ask skeptically. “Everyone gets a common cold once in a while.”

“Not me,” he says proudly. “I haven’t been sick since I was a child. At the very least, if I have been sick, it must have been so mild that I wasn’t slowed down in the slightest – no need for Pepperup, thanks.”

“I’d be careful, Sebastian,” Ominis demurs. “Wouldn’t want to tempt fate, would we?”

With a lazy shrug, Sebastian turns to his potions station and begins to roughly chop some dittany leaves for a new healing potion Sharp intends to teach that afternoon. He glances up surreptitiously while you tie your hair back with one of those green ribbons you like to keep around your wrist for when the Potions classroom becomes especially humid with cauldron steam.

Though it’s unwise to lose focus while holding a knife, Sebastian has become quite skilled at multitasking while tending to his lovesick heart with stolen glances and half-formed daydreams.

He becomes so distracted staring at the column of your neck that when he suddenly feels a bit dizzy, he merely attributes it to the thick, heavy air in the room.

—

Tuesday, October 6, 1891

“You look dreadful,” you tell Sebastian cheerfully as you take a seat at breakfast.

Across from you, Sebastian looks a sight. His generally unruly hair is sticking up in every direction, and his face, which until this morning had still been sun-kissed and freckled from his time carrying out summer chores in Feldcroft, is ghostly pale.

“Cheers,” he grumbles, his head in his hands as he stares down at a plate full of untouched tattie scones.

You know for a fact they’re his favorite. In fact, you’ve stolen countless scones from the Great Hall on weekends when he treats himself to a bit of a lie-in just to make sure there are some left for when he finally emerges, hair rumpled and cheeks creased with pillow lines.

“Late night?” you ask him as you pour yourself some juice.

“The opposite, actually,” Ominis explains. “Sebastian was asleep before I even finished my Runes assignment last night, and I practically had to drag him out of bed this morning.”

“That doesn’t sound like you,” you comment, frowning. “You’re usually up half the night reading. Are you sure you’re alright?”

Sebastian shrugs weakly. “I’m fine, I just… It’s dreadfully warm in the castle, and my head is aching.”

Without thinking, you reach across the table and press the back of your hand against his forehead.

“You’re quite hot,” you mumble.

“Wh-what?” Sebastian stammers, his eyes going wide. “What did you do that for?”

“You have a fever,” you explain to him. “Old Muggle trick. And your eyes are quite glassy. I think you might be coming down with something.”

Ominis unsubtly slides further down the bench.

“I’m not sick,” Sebastian protests. “It’s just the heat, it’s making me tired.”

You eye him warily, and as if to prove that he’s not ill, Sebastian lifts one of his hoarded scones to his mouth and takes a bite.

“See?” he asks with his mouth full. “M’fine.”

You grimace. “Lovely.”

Sebastian determinedly joins you and Ominis for Potions and manages to remain upright until the very end of class. He sways just a bit as he gathers up his belongings, and you offer him your shoulder while you make your way toward the stairs to Divination.

He balks when he sees the twisting spiral steps.

“On second thought,” he mumbles, “I think I’ll skive off today and get some rest.”

“Will you be alright?” you ask him concernedly. “I can come with you…”

“No, it’s fine,” he insists. “I’ll just lie down for a bit and then I’ll be grand, I promise. Save a seat for me at dinner, will you?”

Later that evening you linger in the Great Hall until the last of dinner melts through the tables down to the kitchens below, but Sebastian never shows up.

—

Wednesday, October 7, 1891

“You do not want to go in there,” Ominis tells you warningly. “Trust me, he’s a mess.”

You scoff. “Don’t be ridiculous.”

Sebastian still hasn’t emerged from his dormitory in nearly eighteen hours, and you’re starting to worry for him. Ominis had brought him back some food from dinner the night before, but according to him, it had gone untouched.

When he’d failed to show his face at breakfast, you knew you had to step in.

“He wouldn’t want you to see him like this,” Ominis tries. “Sebastian is hardly a gentleman, but some things are sacred.”

“He’s our best friend,” you remind Ominis. “I really don’t care if he’s not entirely put together.”

Ominis opens his mouth as if to say more, and then seemingly changes his mind.

“Fine,” he sighs. “I’ll tell Professor Sharp you’re tending to Sebastian, and I’ll ask Amit if you can borrow his notes.”

“You’re a lifesaver, Ominis,” you breathe, quickly pulling him in for a hug. “What would we do without you?”

“Rot in Azkaban, most likely,” he grumbles, which… is fair.

Once Ominis leaves for class, you gently knock on the seventh-year boys’ dormitory door. “Sebastian? Can I come in?”

Through the door, you hear him whine, “Go ‘way.”

“Sebastian,” you call out patiently. “Ominis told me you’re sick, and you haven’t gotten out of bed in too long. I’m coming in.”

He protests weakly from his bed as you open the door and slip inside, carefully pressing it closed behind you. As you’d expected, his other roommates have all gone for the day. Only Sebastian remains – or at least, you think it’s Sebastian.

All you can see sticking out from underneath the pile of pilfered blankets on his bed is a mess of curly, brown hair.

“Oh, dear,” you sigh.

“Jus’ leave me alone,” he mumbles from beneath the covers. “...I think I’m sick.”

“Finally facing the music, are you?” you tease him, taking a seat at the foot of his bed. “How are you feeling?”

“Like death warmed over,” he groans. “I’ve never been this ill before.”

“Should I take you to see Nurse Blainey?” you ask him. “I know you can’t have Pepperup Potion, but perhaps she has something else that would help.”

“No,” he sighs. “Ominis already sent for her, she said I’m a dafty and I’ll be fine in a coupl’a days.”

You bite back a laugh at Sebastian’s deteriorating accent; for how posh he usually sounds, apparently that rougher Feldcroft vernacular tends to slip out when he’s feeling poorly.

“Poor lamb,” you croon. “Can I do anything for you? Have you eaten?”

“M’not hungry,” he sulks. “Ominis made me drink some water before he left.”

You hum softly as you start to slowly pull his piles of blankets down low enough that you can see his face. Quickly you realize that Ominis had been exaggerating – Sebastian doesn’t look entirely a mess.

His eyes are a bit wet and glassy, you observe, and his nose is bright red from persistent rubbing with a handkerchief abandoned on his bedside table. He looks a little swollen beneath his jaw, but otherwise, he looks like he’d merely stayed awake all night, and you’ve seen a sleepless Sebastian countless times throughout your friendship.

There’s a bit of stubble along his jaw that you’ve never noticed before; it’s the same rich brown color as his wild, unkempt hair.

(Honestly, how dare he still look handsome even when he’s ill.)

“Hello, you,” you tease him in a voice just above a whisper. “Was beginning to wonder if you were even there under all those blankets.”

“I’m cold,” he complains.

“That’s the fever talking,” you tell him. “You should probably–”

But before you can tell him that he’d be better off with less covers, the blankets shift lower and you realize he’s not wearing a pajama shirt.

(Your disobedient mind immediately raises the question of whether he’s wearing anything at all, and subsequently, if you could get away with having a look. Immediately you scold that particular thought away.)

“Er, you should… don’t overheat yourself,” you finish lamely.

He’s flushed down to his chest, fever-pale skin burning red where the blankets had been piled on top of him. You discover that he’s got a thin smattering of hair here, too; he’s grown into the body of a man much sooner than many of your classmates, you imagine.

Sebastian watches as you swallow, your own eyes raking down his body.

“You’re missing class,” he observes. “You never miss class.”

“It’ll be alright, just this once,” you say softly.

For a moment you aren’t sure if you’re talking about missing class or being in Sebastian’s bed.

Then Sebastian suddenly starts to cough and hastily reaches for his handkerchief. He sounds utterly pathetic as he coughs and groans in discomfort, rolling onto his side and looking for all the world like a kicked puppy.

“My chest hurts,” he whimpers. “I’ve been coughing all night.”

You reach across him and gently stroke the backs of your fingers down the middle of his chest. His skin is noticeably hot to the touch and damp with sweat.

“I can put some Muggle herbs in a warm compress for your chest,” you offer. “I know they’re not as effective as a potion would be, but it always helped me feel better when I was a child.”

“Alright, I suppose that’d be nice,” he mumbles.

But when you move to stand, he quickly snags your wrist.

“Wait,” he says. “Er… where would you go? For how long?”

“Well, I’ll have to go see if Nurse Blainey has any, and if not I can go look at the edge of the Forbidden Forest,” you explain. “It might take a bit of time, I’m afraid.”

“Then, just… stay,” he whines. “Keep me company? That’s better than some plain old herbs.”

You shift onto the bed, curling up on your side behind Sebastian. It’s a tight fit, and you’re dangerously close to falling off the edge, but you’re able to leave enough space between your bodies that you can make the argument that it’s friendly, and it’s fine.

“Can I rub your back?” you ask him softly. “It might help with the soreness.”

You have no idea if it will help his aching body, but you’re eager to try it nonetheless.

“Go on,” Sebastian rasps. “I… I might fall asleep.”

“You should,” you croon. “Your body’s telling you that you need to rest.”

“S’pathetic,” he grumbles. “I never get sick.”

“You had a good run,” you tease him. “But the common cold comes for us all eventually.”

He falls silent after that, his leanly muscled arms curled around a pillow while you stroke your hand up and down the length of his back. He’s so warm, and you’re a bit anxious about letting him ride out a fever as long as he has, but soon he drifts off to sleep.

You learn two things while he rests: he snores when he’s on his back, and he frowns whenever you take your hands off of him.

—

Thursday, October 8, 1891

Ominis had managed to talk you into returning to your own dormitory for the night, promising to look after Sebastian while you got some rest. When you return the following morning, you find him in even worse condition.

His sheets are bunched down to his hips, and he’s still bare from the waist up. His entire body is covered in a thin layer of sweat, and the bags underneath his eyes have worsened – despite how much rest he’s getting, he seems more fatigued than ever.

“What happened?!” you ask Ominis.

“He’s had a fever all night,” Ominis says grimly, looking just as worn out as Sebastian. “He hasn’t eaten a thing, and I’ve barely been able to get him to drink some water.”

“Oh, Seb,” you sigh, taking his clammy hand and resting it in your lap as you sit on the edge of the bed. “You poor thing.”

“I think I’m dying,” he rasps. “This is it, right?”

“Hush now, there’s no need to be so dramatic,” you gently scold him, pressing your hand to his forehead. “You’re quite warm, but I’m not worried about your imminent demise.”

“I’m disgusting,” he groans. “I can’t stop coughing, I’m sweating everywhere, I feel like I’m going to be sick but there’s nothing to–”

He cuts himself off with several dry, pathetic coughs.

“Here’s what we’re going to do,” you tell him firmly. “Ominis is going to go to class and come back this afternoon with some Muggle medicinals. In the meantime, I’m going to help you eat a bit of food and have a bath.”

“N-no, absolutely not,” he stammers. “You think I want you seeing me like this any more than you already have?”

“You’ll feel better,” you promise him. “And I swear I won’t, er… look, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

You argue back and forth until Sebastian, utterly depleted of his typical stubbornness, loses energy and gives in. Ominis promises to stop by J. Pippin’s to see if the shopkeeper has any draughts suitable for Sebastian’s allergies before leaving to go to class, and you help Sebastian get out of bed with his arm around your shoulders and your own around his waist.

(He’s got pants on, thank Merlin, but you have to help him into a pair of pajamas to make the walk to the Slytherin baths.)

Sebastian balks when you enter the boys’ baths, but you both quickly learn there are no enchantments in place to keep you from joining him. You offer him an arm to lean on while he takes off his pajamas and coughs – this time pointedly – for you to turn around while he sinks into the lukewarm bath you’d drawn.

“This does feel nice,” he finally says once he’s settled in the opaque, murlap-scented water.

“Good,” you say, hoping he doesn’t notice how your voice has gone up a bit higher than usual. “I’ll be back in a few moments with some fresh pajamas for you.”

“I’ll try not to drown while you’re gone,” he drawls, and even though he still sounds exhausted, you smile to yourself knowing that the bath is already helping him feel more like his usual self.

Hogwarts’ house elves were exceptionally fast in tidying up the boys’ dormitory while the two of you were out, so when you finally lead a clean, dry Sebastian back to his room, you’re thrilled to find freshly laundered sheets and a new pair of pillows waiting for him.

“Gods, I love magic,” he groans as he collapses into bed.

You stay all afternoon and into the evening. Ominis returns shortly before dinner with a brew from Parry Pippin himself, similar to the Pepperup Potion but with cinnamon instead of powdered bicorn horn.

(Sebastian seems to emit thin tendrils of steam straight from the top of his head after he drinks it, but he perks up all the same.)

Feenky herself brings a tray of soup and some leftover scones from breakfast once Sebastian regains his appetite. While he eats, he tells you about how he used to sit with Anne during the summers when she was particularly ill from her curse.

“At the time, I wondered if my being there was more of a help or a hindrance,” he says ruefully. “She was… hard to read, then. I couldn’t tell if she was annoyed by me or appreciated me staying.”

You pause before shyly asking, “Am I helping? By being here?”

“Of course,” he says without thinking.

“Then I’m sure you were helping Anne, even when she was annoyed,” you tell him reassuringly. “That’s all we ever want to do really, isn’t it? Help the ones we love?”

Sebastian glances up at his tray with an inscrutable expression on his face. His eyes are still glassy and he’s a bit peaky, but the cinnamon-laced, not-quite-Pepperup Potion has restored some of the usual warmth in his gaze.

“Right,” he echoes. “Help the ones we love.”

You end up staying the night in the boys’ dormitory. Only Ominis knows you’re there, as he draws the curtains around the both of you before the boys’ other roommates return from the common room. Given that Sebastian seems to be feeling better already, it’s not strictly necessary.

But it feels nice all the same.

—

Friday, October 9, 1891

Sebastian’s fever finally broke during the night.

When you wake up he’s wrapped around you from behind, one of his legs jammed between yours with his arm curled possessively around your waist.

You’re sweltering, but he’s cool to the touch.

“Sebastian,” you whisper, but he doesn’t answer.

Judging by the way sunlight pours over the top of Sebastian’s bed curtains, it’s well past when you’d usually wake up during the school week. You can’t hear any other snoring boys around you, either.

“Sebastian,” you hiss. “Wake up.”

He groans tiredly into your hair as his arm tightens around your waist. “No.”

“N-no?!” you sputter. “It’s morning! We… we should, er.”

You trail off when you realize you aren’t quite sure what you should be doing. Evidently you’ve missed breakfast, and you’ve likely missed the start of Potions for the third day in a row. Professor Sharp will have no choice but to give you a detention; just as well, you suppose, as you can use the time to make up what you’ve missed.

But now that the damage is done…

“How are you feeling?” you ask him softly, your eyes still fixed on the green curtains in front of your face.

“Loads better,” he says, only this time his lips are pressed against the sensitive spot behind your ear.

You gasp as he rolls more of his weight toward you, pressing you more firmly into the mattress.

“Sebastian…” you sigh.

“I had a dream about you last night,” he confesses, his voice barely above a whisper beneath your ear. “I’ve heard Pepperup Potion can give one strange dreams.”

“St-strange?” you whisper back. “Why was it a strange dream?”

“I suppose it wasn’t really ‘strange,’” he acquiesces. “But it was nice. Really nice.”

“Tell me about it?” you ask breathlessly.

“Perhaps I’ll show you instead,” he asks, and when you nod, he slides his hand down to your hip and turns you onto your back.

Then quite suddenly he’s leaning over you, one knee still between your thighs. He rests on his elbows so his face is just centimeters from yours, and it’s the first time you’ve gotten a good look at him since the boys put out last night’s fire.

Sebastian looks so much better. His cheeks are flushed, his eyes are clear and bright, and the sickly sheen of sweat he’d worn for days is entirely gone. (His hair is still a bird’s nest, but that’s to be expected.)

“We were like this,” he tells you.

“Were we just talking?” you ask him, but you’re met with only silence.

After a beat, he asks you, “Why have you been so kind to me this week?”

“You’re my best friend,” you tell him softly. “I – I wanted to help you feel better.”

“Is that all I am?” he asks. “Am I simply your friend?”

You bite your lip hesitantly and his gaze dips down to your mouth, his brown eyes nearly black in the soft morning light.

“Do you want to kiss me, Sebastian?” you ask.

Rather than answering, he surprises you by leaning down and pressing a sweet kiss to the corner of your mouth. Then he lifts one of his hands to gently tip your face toward his, cradling your jaw while he deepens the kiss into one that’s hardly sweet at all.

It feels like it’s perhaps the first time in days that Sebastian has felt hunger.

You gasp his name into his mouth and then he’s the one biting your lip, just a quick graze of his teeth before he soothes your ensuing whine with another slow kiss. He shifts his weight onto his hip to rest on the mattress beside you, using that leg between yours to coax you into lying next to him. He rewards your body’s assent with a filthy kiss – the kind you’ve only read about in those Muggle romance novels you hide under your pillow, the kind where the hero kisses the girl with his tongue in her mouth and his hand in her blouse.

“Seb,” you moan.

“I didn’t know,” he confesses against your lips.

“Didn’t know what?” you whine.

“I didn’t know you loved me until last night,” he says, pressing his forehead against yours.

You’re so distracted by how red and swollen his lips look that you nearly miss him saying, “You stayed with me all week, you held me, practically healed me, and I still didn’t know.”

“Of course I love you,” you tell him.

“You love Ominis, you love Poppy,” he counters. “This – us – is different. Right?”

And the truth is, you would have done anything you’d done for Sebastian for any one of your friends. You would have helped Poppy into a warm bath and back into bed, and you would have sat at Ominis’ bedside all day and torn up pieces of scone to float on the surface of his soup.

But you would not have let them press you into their bedsheets and trace their lips along your neck, and right now Sebastian is eagerly doing both.

“Yes,” you whimper, both in answer to his question and as a plea for more.

“I love you, too,” he sighs against your jaw. “I have for ages, and I didn’t want you to see me all pathetic and poorly, but you still love me anyway.”

“I’ve loved you through worse,” you quietly remind him.

He nips at your throat for that remark; you’ve both agreed to speak of your fifth year as little as possible. Truly, the only reason you’d ever bring it up now is to remind Sebastian that you’ve long since made your choice – him, over duty and the law and perhaps even reason.

“Stay with me,” he pleads. “We have all morning, we have the dormitory to ourselves. Let me take care of you now.”

He pulls your thigh across his own and tangles his fingers in your sleep-mussed hair, holding you against his warm, bare chest.

“That’s tempting,” you breathe. “B-but perhaps we should check with Nurse Blainey, to see if you’re ready to return to–”

You cut yourself off with a gasp as he grinds his hips against yours. There’s no mistaking that he’s aroused, and that alone convinces you that he must be feeling well – you’re positive that he would’ve been too weak for this type of debauchery yesterday morning even if you’d gotten fully nude before him and begged.

“Trust me, I feel excellent,” he moans into your mouth. “Love, please.”

You don’t come up for air for a long while after that. By the time Ominis stops by during lunchtime to check on Sebastian, he nearly trips over your skirt, hastily tossed near the doorway.

“I take it you’re feeling better,” he deadpans.

“That potion of yours worked like a charm, Ominis,” Sebastian drawls. “Cinnamon, who would have thought?”

“I don’t suppose I mentioned that Muggles find cinnamon to be an organic aphrodisiac?” Ominis says innocently. “At least, that’s what Mister Pippin said. He told me you might have some rather amorous dreams while you recover.”

“No, I think you forgot to mention that,” Sebastian replies just as innocently.

Ominis simply hums and says, “Well, now that you’ve been made aware, I’ll be off to Herbology. I’d recommend locking the door if our dear friend is going to be keeping you company this afternoon, Sebastian.”

You’re too embarrassed to say a word, but Sebastian cheerfully thanks him as he pulls the door shut and reaches for his wand on his bedside table to magically lock it behind him.

“We’ve become menaces,” you whine as he rolls on top of you once more.

Sebastian grins wickedly down at you. “Not yet we haven’t, but thank Merlin we’ve got all afternoon.”

[lewkwoodnco]

You look like shit - Lockwood x Reader

One time you told lockwood he looked like shit and four times he told you you looked like shit

“You look like shit.”

“Oh, I see how it is. You’re in a hospital bed but I’m the one who looks like shit.”

“Exactly, you look spectacularly terrible. Did you sleep at all last night?”

“I tried, but my sorry excuse of a boss got his ass kicked by some Type Two, so here I am.”

“Doesn’t your sorry excuse of a boss write your cheques?”

“Have I mentioned how fond I am of my sorry excuse of a boss?”

a/n: just a little drabble i typed up having been inspired by this post :)

tropes/warnings: mostly fluffy, some mentions of grief, slight description of injury, smidge of flirty-ish banter 🙈🙈

wc: 1.5k!

MASTERLIST | TAGLIST

“You look like shit.”

Lockwood froze with his mug halfway to his mouth. He gaped at her briefly before setting the mug down once the shock passed. She was Lockwood & Co.'s newest employee and it was only recently that the ice had been sufficiently broken for their interactions to evolve into something more than a passing smile or greeting. This, however, was more than he had expected. He was possessed by a sudden overwhelming urge to laugh.

"It's like, 10 in the morning, and you already look exhausted. Do you ever sleep?"

He struggled with his words for a moment. "...yes. Sometimes."

"Not enough, clearly."

He did look especially worse for wear that morning. Only just recovering from a mild flu, his insomnia was at an all-time high and the lack of sun over the past week had his skin looking nearly transparent. He was a frail, washed-out thing flitting restlessly between rooms, bemoaning all the cases he was missing out on while cooped up here.

He smiled for what felt like the first time in days. She coughed, embarrassed, feeling like she had grossly overstepped.

"I mean...you don't look that horrible."

Fortunately, Lucy chose that exact moment to walk in and sufficiently distract Lockwood with the details of their newest case and she took the opportunity to duck out of the room. What the hell had she been thinking?

"H- oh, you look like shit."

She emerged from behind the counter through a cloud of steam, her hair resting on her shoulders like a large, frizzy, brittle rat. While he and George had spent the morning at the Archives, she had spent it at Portland Row preparing Fesenjān for their lunch as part of some stupid bet she had made with George.

"Oh, good, you're back. You took your time."

"George is still there so Lucy's going in to hel-"

She cut him off by shoving a spoon of hot stew into his mouth.

"Taste."

Lockwood spluttered around the spoon, mouth working furiously to cool the scalding food while she watched him intently.

"Well?"

"It's...it's good."

"As good as George's?"

He grimaced. "I don't think I should be taking sides in this." He didn't even want to think about George finding out.

"This isn't taking sides. But also, if anyone asks, you weren't here. So...?" She fixed a desperate look on him. Lockwood sighed.

"It could use a little more salt."

"Angel." She turned around, pulling out the salt while he watched her with a flicker of amusement in his eyes. The crazy hair suited her in some odd way.

“You look like shit.”

He had meant for it to come out as teasing but at the sight of her tearstained face, it sounded terribly mean. He had found her sitting on the front steps late one evening when he was about to turn in, only a thin hoodie insulating her from the harsh cold. Her head whipped around at the sound of his voice, a hand carelessly dragged across her face. He took a seat next to her, dropping his voice.

"Everything alright?"

She swallowed, eyes trained on their shoes. Her voice was hoarse with disuse.

"One of my friends moved away a couple of years back. She's been in an accident."

"How bad of an accident?"

There was a tightness in her chest that made it difficult to go on. "The worst."

In a rare moment of weakness, she crumbled, sagging against Lockwood like she had no spine left to hold herself upright. He wrapped a warm, comforting arm around her, and the simple gesture was enough to break her down. She cried into his shirt, cried for the friend she would never see again, cried for the part of her childhood that had chipped off and floated away into some abyss. Cried while he held her.

"I can't -" she hiccuped, unable to hold back a poorly concealed sob. "I can't even remember the last thing I said to her." It felt like an awful thing to admit, something sinful and evil, something that made it impossible for her to shake the tremble from her hands. His hold on her tightened a fraction, like he was holding her shattered pieces together, and she clung to his shirt with all the despair of a shipwrecked passenger.

Maybe it was selfish, but she didn't want him to leave. And so he stayed.

“You look like shit.”

“Thanks.”

They had just returned from a job at some old, abandoned building set to be torn down in a few months. George and Lucy were handling some other case at the other end of the city, so the sounds of them shucking off their coats and gear echoed through the empty house. Between the two of them, she was always more prone to going ham on their cases. Today, it was in the form of her barrelling full tilt through a series of cobwebs to serve as a distraction. The case had ended with Lockwood hurriedly bagging the Source and her pink-faced and speckled with the grey strings.

Back at Portland Row's kitchen, there was still a lingering tinge of warmth to her cheeks. Lockwood paused by the cupboard where she was pulling out some mugs and plates, idly picking off the remaining strands still loosely clinging to her hair and shoulders. As his movements slowed, fading into something more gentle and meticulous, she glanced at him. He looked back. The cobwebs now littered the little space between them, but still he did not move away. The back of her neck prickled under his wretchedly attentive gaze. She did not know how to look away.

"Tea?" she croaked out, throat embarrassingly taut with choked-back emotion.

Whatever spell that had settled over them broke. Lockwood reeled back, almost noisily busying himself with fishing out the biscuit tin, forcing something nonchalant into his voice.

"Sure."

They spent the rest of their night operating with an invisible bubble between them, neither of them daring to get too close to the other lest a brush of the hand shattered the pallid illusion they were play-acting in. The house was far too quiet that night, filled with the unbearably soothing sounds of their cutlery, the rain and their breathing. Lockwood fiddled with his mug. She scratched at a particularly obscene message etched into the thinking cloth. He dragged a shoe along the scuffed kitchen floors. She drummed her fingers restlessly, watching the seconds tick by excruciatingly slow on the clock.

Where the hell were George and Lucy?

“You look like shit.”

“Oh, I see how it is. You’re in a hospital bed but I’m the one who looks like shit.”

She was in a gleaming, sterile hospital room, painfully twisted into some uncomfortable plastic chair after a night of fitful sleep and checking to make sure Lockwood was still alive. Lockwood had gone out for a solo case and she had been waiting up, expecting him to return any minute when the hospital called. Luckily, it was nothing fatal, but enough to keep him out of commission for a while. Enough to make her worry.

“Exactly, you look spectacularly terrible. Did you sleep at all last night?”

“I tried, but my sorry excuse of a boss got his ass kicked by some Type Two, so here I am.”

“Doesn’t your sorry excuse of a boss write your cheques?”

“Have I mentioned how fond I am of my sorry excuse of a boss?”

He quirked a smile at that, then immediately winced. She lightly tilted his bruised face just as he raised a tentative hand to the stitches on his lip, their fingers brushing against each other for a fraction of a second. He looked at her questioningly, unable to see how it was healing himself, and she thought it was extremely unfair to have eyes as disarming as his. She shoved down the stab of sympathy at the unexpectedly vulnerable sight. Hospital gowns really did a number on how strong, or lack thereof, a patient seemed.

“Poor baby. Do you need someone to kiss it better?”

“You could kiss me better.”

“You…are clearly still concussed. Where on earth is your nurse?”

She stood and busied herself by sticking her head out the door and looking for his nurse, which was most definitely not an attempt to hide the flush creeping up her neck. After a few minutes of futile searching, she returned, alarmed at how wan Lockwood was starting to seem.

“I don’t remember getting a concussion,” he murmured, closing his aching eyes.

“Of course you wouldn’t. That’s how concussions work. Idiot.” She tried to keep her tone light, but he cracked an eye open as if he had heard something in her voice. He slipped her fingers through hers casually and she felt the tension in his stiff shoulders ease.

"You should sleep," she tried gently. His thumb slowly traced hers drowsily. Still, he forced his eyes open with considerable effort. Looked at her like she was all he wanted to see for the rest of his life.

"In a minute."

It was the first of the lifetime of minutes ahead of them.

TAGLIST: @ell0ra-br3kk3r @cielooci @midnight--raine @mohinithoughts @neewtmas @snoopyluver20 @ahead-fullofdreams @elenianag080 @mischivana @houseoftwistedspirits @avdiobliss @dangelnleif @mitskiswift99

[swampgallows]

There is more COVID-19 transmission today (January 2024) than during 94.7% of the pandemic.

💉 Please get the updated (new, not a booster) Covid vaccine. If you're in the US, ask your local pharmacy about the Bridge Access Program for free vaccines. You can also search vaccines.gov then select Bridge Access Program participant.

If you do not want an mRNA vaccine for whatever reason, consider Novavax: it is protein-based like other typical vaccines from the last few decades, and many (including myself) report minimal side effects. Talk to your doctor if you have questions or concerns.

😷 Wear a mask in public and/or any enclosed areas. "Mask" means a respirator of KN95/N95 filtration or higher, not a cloth or surgical (blue) mask. Covid is airborne, so an airtight seal and particulate filter is necessary for protection. Different kinds of respirators are used for everything from toxic fumes to asbestos removal; when worn properly, they greatly reduce risk.

Here is a guide for proper use and fitting of a respiratory mask.

Here is a short video by 3M (respirator manufacturer) on the importance of fit-testing.

🧪 Have tests ready. With the new variants it can sometimes take 5-8 days to test positive, so be sure to test twice, 48 hours apart. If you're in the US, you can get 4 free rapid tests sent to your home through USPS. Local schools and libraries also may have free rapid tests. If you qualify for the Test to Treat program, you can receive free at-home NAAT tests and treatment for both flu AND Covid, and access to telehealth. The earlier you test positive, the more likely you will be eligible for treatment with Paxlovid.

🔁 If you can afford it, air purifiers and HEPA filters can help reduce transmission. Making a Corsi-Rosenthal box is simple and inexpensive. If weather permits, keeping windows open helps. Ventilation allows fresh air to circulate.

👃 Nasal sprays and CPC mouthwash are other useful prophylactic measures when used in conjunction with PPE and other modes of mitigation like masking and distancing.

🚬There is still a risk of Covid when outside, similar to exposure from secondhand smoke or a fire. Since Covid is spread through aerosols, it can hang in the air like smoke.

🐶 As with other coronaviruses, many household pets can get Covid. If you have been exposed, avoid contact with animals.

"But I'm not old or weak. Why should I care?"

☣ Covid can still kill you or disable you for life, even if your initial sickness is "mild". Even if you are young and have no preexisting conditions. 90% of the original "long haulers" had "mild" cases.

🩺 Covid increases your risk of stroke, blood clots, and heart disease by 2 to 5 times within a year of infection. It can also cause brain damage, which is part of the loss of taste and smell and cognitive symptoms like brain fog.

🩸 Covid is able to infect multiple organ systems because it travels through the bloodstream and attacks the mitochondria, leading to dysfunction and chronic fatigue.

⚠ Reinfection doesn't make your body better at fighting Covid; it just does more damage to your immune system, akin to HIV. A damaged immune system is worse at fighting off illness, more susceptible to infection, and can lead to serious complications like pneumonia. And with every reinfection, your chances of developing Long Covid increase. Therefore, the best protection for your immune system is to avoid getting Covid as much as possible.

I know everyone is tired of this. But if there was any time to be vigilant, it is now. Please, let's protect each other.

[dailymanners]

IF it can be helped at all, stay home when you are sick to prevent your illness from spreading to others, even if it's not a "serious" illness and is just a common cold, a common cold can still be really detrimental anyone with a weakened or compromised immune system from conditions including, but not limited to, leukemia, HIV, and hepatitis. And you can never know if one of your co-workers or a customer or a random stranger at the store has or lives with someone who has one of these conditions.

Not everyone can help it, some people risk losing their job if they call in sick, and not everyone has someone they can call on to run to the store for essentials while they're sick.

In these cases at least consider wearing a mask while you're in public so as to prevent spreading your sickness to co-workers / customers / random strangers you encounter while out in public. There are several cultures where even pre-COVID times it was considered rude to go out in public without a mask even if you had a simple cold because of it being inconsiderate to spread your sickness to others.

Now, if it can be helped at all, if you have a job where you can call in sick without losing your income, or if you have a job where you can work form home, or if you have anyone at all you can call on to run to the store for you to grab essentials, use that!

"Oh but I don't want to inconvenience my co-workers by having them down a person today, what if they really need my help?" You know what's going to inconvenience them more is when you make everyone at work sick, and some of them might either have a compromised immune system or live with someone who does.

"Oh but I don't want to inconvenience my friend by asking them to grab some essentials from the store for me while I'm sick!" You know what's going to be more inconvenient is when you spread your sickness to that dad you stood in line behind at the store who has a child at home withe leukemia, or a spouse with HIV.

And again, of course not everyone has an option. Some people risk losing their income if they call into work sick, or they don't have anyone who they can call on to get essentials from the store for them. But again, at least consider masking up to mitigate the risk of spreading your illness to vulnerable people who could be seriously harmed by even a common cold or mild flu.

[cozymoko]

You wanted requests, right? So what if it was the other way around? Yandere Siyun Baek having to take care of his girlfriend that got sick?

(I hope this requests isn't too boring, love your blog btw ❤❤)

SIYUN BAEK WITH A SICK S/O

Manhwa: “Dreaming Freedom” ~~~~!

Note: Its perfect! Thank you for requesting! Also thank you for reading, you made my day. ♡

Pairing: Siyun Baek x female! reader

Format: Headcanons; 2nd person

WARNING(S): Yandere themes, obsession, mild spoilers

Word Count: ???

It's ALLERGY and/or FLU SEASON, and unfortunately, you've fallen very ill. Best case scenario you'll have a cold and nothing more; a high fever at the worst. But either way, Siyun isn't complaining.

You can't go anywhere? Great! You feel like absolute shit and can barely move from your bed? Oh my, even better! Besides working out, Siyun doesn't have much to pass his time with. He's lonely without you, often finding himself watching the clock, counting the minutes — seconds before you return to him.

But seeing you tucked tightly beneath the pastel duvet, wrapped in a small cocoon. Your cheeks lightly flushed a rather feverish hue, as ragged breaths slipped past your dry lips. Call him crazy but you're absolutely adorable. He could hardly keep his hands to himself!

“Y'know, you look really cute like this {Name}.”

You huffed, “You almost look happy that I'm in this situation.” With a light shove, you pushed his face away from your own for what felt like the thousandth time. Finally ditching the thick sheets, you turn away from him, welcoming the chilled puffs of air to your warm skin.

“Would you be mad if I said I was?” Siyun asked, snaking his arms around your waist, pressing his cheek into the tender skin of your own. “God, you're adorable...”

“Yes. Now, let go; I'm burning up.”

Siyun is CLINGY as it is. Therefore, you being bedridden to some degree is right up his alley. Personal space has never been a thing in your relationship, and he's not going to let a little flu stop him. Embracing you, suffocating you with his body; it's all too easy! Pressing sweet, chaste kisses along the warm skin of your neck. Sneakily, dragging his slender fingers beneath the flimsy silk of your pajamas.

In all honesty, he'd rather have you stay at his house until you feel well again. It works pretty well, convenience-wise. It stops him from wrenching your door open, occupying your home with the crying of loud unwavering hinges. Or perhaps even sneaking through your window.

You being so vulnerable excites him in more ways than he'd care to admit. He truly is a pervert. Chewing on his pink lips, even digging his nails into his milky skin, no longer seems to be enough. Though his desires are anything but malicious, Siyun can't help the wandering of his young mind to many, many impure places.

Your parents already adore him, let's be honest! Thus, convincing them to let you stay the night or week should be a piece of cake. It's almost scary, the way he speaks to your parents; so polite and dare I say perfect. It's truly no surprise that he was a former idol, a famous one at that. How could your adoring mother and father not allow such a kind man to nurture and care for your well-being?

Siyun brings your head to his chest, relishing in the heat you radiate. His hands had fallen past your waist, toying with the thin band of your thin shorts. You give his chest a weak push, as a pitiful attempt to distance yourself. But it was no use, he merely pulled you closer, much to your dismay.

“Siyun...” You breathed out, weakly clawing at his slender hands. “Stop this, you're going to get sick.”

He hummed, “Is that so?” Though his hands showed no sign of leaving your waist. Instead, they tugged you flush against his chest with a low chuckle. Warm breath tickled the back of your neck, making you tense in anticipation.

“Then I guess we're just gonna have to be sick together~!” ♡

Let's say you're a STUDENT; high school or college, it's your choice. And due to your abrupt sickness, you're bound to miss at least a handful of classes. But fret not my dear, your classmates are itching to help you out. I mean, you're dating the Siyun Baek after all, just a glance at him could send anything girl into a frenzy!

Thankfully, your teacher settled for your seatmate. A kind, extroverted guy who you got along with quite well. He had managed to get your number due to a recent project and was quick to alert you of his unexpected arrival.

[CHOI BYUNG-CHUL]

➤ Heya [Last Name], the teacher asked me to bring sum missin assignments to ur place. Is that okey with u?

SENT; 17:23

You snort at the scrambled characters, finding some charm amongst the male's easy mistakes. It wasn't something unusual as he was an infamous clutz in your class. So he was likely texting while typing, again. Your fingers hover over the luminous keyboard, before eventually sending him a simple response.

[YOU] ➤ Yeah, it's fine lol. But I'm not home so come to this address “XX XXXX Avenue/Drive/Street” SENT; 17:25

➤ Have a safe trip. :)

SENT; 17:25

While immersed in your phone, you had yet to notice a certain someone looming over you in displeasure. From lack of attention, perhaps. But you had never been one to allow technology to soak up your time, nonetheless when you're ill. So who could possibly be taking up your time? He pondered, glaring hard at the device resting on your hand.

Pulling back the covers, Siyun moved to join you beneath the spotless sheets of the mattress. The dipping of the bed didn't bother you, let alone pull you from the flashing screen of your phone. The ex-idol sighed loudly, shifting to take the pesky item from your protective grip. Only to be brushed off by a bored, dismissive hand.

He. Was. Livid.

“Babe~!” Siyun cooed, though his tone lacked even an ounce of playfulness. “What on your phone could possibly be so damn interestin—” DING DONG!

Whew! Saved by the bell.

“I'll get it.” He murmured under his breath, tossing the thick duvet to the side. The man was quick to leave in long, haste strides, but not before his eyes flicked to your stunned form one last time.

Now, Siyun had expected a lot of things, but this surely wasn't one of them. A shorter male, about five feet seven inches, no older than nineteen was at his door. His mousy brown hair was a mess, and he had a lightly tinted folder tucked tightly beneath his arm.

“H-hi, I'm one of [Last Name]'s classmates and I brought some papers to her.” Byung-Chul commenced, frantically unzipping the top of his backpack. “She — uhm, texted me this address.”

Oh, now it all made sense. The persistent flashing of your phone, snatching your attention right from his grasp. The lighthearted giggles that'd leave your mouth ever so often. Friendly, that they were. Giggles that held no sense of love; merely admiration and glee. Even so, it wasn't good enough.

One could say the latter is quite bitter. And if If looks could kill, your friend would be six — no, ten feet under! And that's being generous. But Siyun knows better than to let his bad side show. Heh, who am I kidding?

A faux smile tugged at the corner of his lips, one he was all too familiar with using. “Ah, I see. Thanks for coming...?”

“Choi Byung-Chul!” He chirped, handing the papers to the former idols' outstretched hand.

“Heh, right,” Siyun scoffs, disinterested. He lazily takes the folder from the male, leaning in a bit too close for comfort. “Since you're already here, I have a little favor for you. If you're up for it.”

“I...um — yeah, sure,” Byung-Chul stammered, looking over the time blaring from the smartwatch adorning his wrist. “I can spare a few minutes. What's up—?”

A sharp pain shot through the poor man's abdomen in mere seconds, sending him crumbling to his knees. Siyun loosely shook his wrist in the air, allowing the gentle breeze to cool the slight stinting of his knuckles. A cold, lifeless expression grazed the face of the once-beloved idol as he watched the man wither beneath his gaze.

“Stay away from [Name]. I wouldn't want anyth ing bad to happen to you~!”

[slasher-male-wife]

Horror characters taking care of their sick s/o

I'm in my sick Victorian boy era. I'm being dramatic because I have a mild case of the flu. I need to write something to keep myself sane so why not write for some characters I haven't written about for awhile.

Includes: Amanda Young, Adam Faulkner, Will Graham, Hannibal Lecter, and Pyramid head

Warnings: Reader is sick, some of these characters aren't super smart, mentions of vomit and medication, vague talk of cannibalism and violence

Amanda Young

Amanda has basic medical knowledge and when she sees you getting sick she's quick to get you to stay in bed and will be a little overbearing. She's been taking care of John for awhile and seeing her partner sick makes her very worried.

She's going to spend any free time she has taking care of you. She knows you're going to be fine but that's not going to stop her from becoming your personal nurse.

She wants to avoid using medication unless a doctor tells her to use them. She thinks because medication isn't working for John that must mean it won't really work for you.

She knows to keep some distance but she's still going to be around you and touch you. She might intentionally spend more time around you then get closer to Hoffman to try and get him sick.

She might talk to Lawrence about what she should be doing and your symptoms. If you know that she's a jigsaw apprentice she'll introduce you to him as her coworker. But if you don't she'll either bribe him into seeing you or just take his advice.

She is reminded of what happened at the gas house and if you're sick enough that you start to throw she'll need to leave the room and probably spend some time to compose herself. I strongly believe that what jigsaw did to her really messed her up but she denies it.

Adam Faulkner

Oh my god if he finds out you're sick I hope you're ready for him to try and help but honestly just make a fool of himself.

You're hopefully not living in his apartment anymore and depending on your temperature and the weather he's going to keep your bedroom window open because "fresh air helps".

He thinks that he doesn't have to keep space from you because you're dating and he probably ends up getting sick himself. But no matter how much you tell him to stay away so he doesn't get sick he won't listen.

While he's out working (probably for jigsaw) he'll leave out medication for you to take, food you can heat up or just eat cold, and probably gives you anything you need to stay entertained.

If you call him for anything he's dropping whatever he's doing to go help you. You have to literally tell him several times that he doesn't have to rush home and you can stay on your own while he works.

He probably doesn't have any insurance just by judging his apartment so unless you absolutely need to see a doctor he's going to be the one taking care of you.

Will Graham

His medical knowledge is better than some people in these head canons but it's still not the best. I feel like if it's anything than a mild case of the cold or the flu he's taking you to a doctor.

Probably looks up if human illnesses can transfer to dogs. Either way he's keeping his dogs away from you until you feel better.

Will not let you out of bed unless you're going to the bathroom. He deals with blood and guts for a living so dealing with someone who's sick is probably a vacation for him.

Will is going to try to keep Hannibal away from you while you're sick for so many reasons. But Hannibal is probably going to end up seeing you anyway because Will is going to cave.

If the weather and your health allows he's going to take you outside for fresh air like you're a consumption patient from 1912. He will let his dogs around you if you're outside.

Will guilt Jack into letting him stay home for a few days to take care of you. He is going to bring up everything Jack has ever done to him. "Hey Jack I need to stay home to take care of my partner. I know you'll let me take it off since you made me work while I had ensyphilitis."

Hannibal Lecter

He's a literal doctor but also a fucking weirdo so be careful. He'll still take good care of you but will also take the time to get into philosophical discussions with you while you're half asleep.

He refuses to give you anything store bought to eat. Will literally make crackers and break from scratch for you to eat. He'll lay off on the human meat until you're better.

Will not allow you to use one of his bowls as a "throw up bowl" You're using the bathroom to do so, he doesn't care if you accidentally vomit on his floors because he can clean the floor, but his bowls are too valuable.

He won't let you spend all day looking at screens. Hannibal will provide you with any kind of entertainment you want to get you off screens for awhile. He will get you whatever books you want or any other low energy activity.

Will insist on keeping your space clean. Will wash your sheets often and insists on giving you a bath, the temperature depending on if you have a fever or not.

He will keep a sort of distance from you but will also be near you. He will take precautions of course but he can't stop himself from spending time in your room, talking with you.

Pyramid head

He has little knowledge of human illnesses, because he's a demi god of sorts he never really gets sick. So when he sees you get cold sweats or start having a bad cough he's confused about why it's happening. '

You'll have to educate him on your condition and tell him what he needs to do to help you. I don't think there's any medication you can take in silent hill but he can probably find you something to help.

He also probably can't get sick so he doesn't have to worry about getting too close to you. If you try to pull away from him to hide your cough or sneeze he'll just pull you back. Even if he did get a cold from you he'd get over it pretty quickly.

He'll honestly want to be pretty touchy all the time even when you're not sick because he's never had human contact before. You'll probably have to explain to him that cuddling isn't the best thing when you have a fever.

He's going to try and get you as comfortable as possible while he's busy doing Pyramid Head stuff. It all depends on your condition and you'll have to explain to him what you need.

He also doesn't really understand germs so you'll have to explain them to him and why you need to keep yourself and your area clean and why you can't just throw up anywhere. After that he'll get you something to use for that then just throw it somewhere.

[thealexandriaarchives]

Heads up for anyone who hasn't gotten your flu and/or Covid shot yet!

Kroger sucks but I have to give them props, they're offering you grocery money to get vaccinated.

You can get up to $20 in grocery money from Kroger right now just for getting your Flu shot & Covid Booster.

Or $5 for just a flu shot! Or if you already got your Covid booster get the $20 by pairing it with another vaccine like RSV or Pneumonia or Hepatitis if you're vulnerable!

Must go to a Kroger owned pharmacy

Must not have federally funded health insurance like Medicaid or Medicaid

Get your flu shot

If you're doing both get your booster in the same visit to qualify

Tell the pharmacist you want your Money when you check out and give them your Kroger rewards card. (Mine is Fred Meyer's etc. Or sign up for one for free first.

This will cover the cost of your shot if you have no insurance, but be a bonus if you're insured!

Getting both at the same time will make you feel like crap (not that day, the next day) but WILL make your immune system better than just getting one at once and get it over with. Influenza and Covid will both also weaken your immune system if you get them, even mild cases, so you're more at risk to catch follow-up infections. Not just for your community, but for yourself - get immunized and have a couple slightly cruddy days instead of a couple awful weeks or worse!

[ghost-bxrd]

Headcanons for hurt Fae!Dick Grayson?

What can hurt Dick? How does the family react when he is hurt, and they are possibly clueless how to help him or if he would be okay?

How does the manor and surroundings react when Dick is hurt, especially if he is badly hurt enough to be unaware what is happening? Or if it is one of the family's fault (unintentionally) that he got hurt?

Ksksks I totally expected this ask to come in at one point or another.

Alright, so with other creatures it’s kind of tricky.

The traditional fae can be hurt by iron, and while this particular version of fae!dick certainly doesn’t like it (at all) it’s more of a… strong allergic reaction than anything. And only if he’s exposed to it long enough.

What can truly hurt an other… well, that depends on the individual. On what they’re tied to, and what feeds their existence.

Some of the other beings live in the shadows, hiding.

For instance, my family used to tell a sort of story where a kind creature would wait for us at the very top of our house, and when it saw us coming home it would make sure it was safe for us to enter and then turn on the light if it was. If it wasn’t, the house would remain dark. Obviously I wanted to catch a glimpse of that “creature”, but stopped immediately when I was told that if I laid eyes on it, the creature would vanish forever.

So this particular other was dependent on remaining “unseen” to keep existing. Another kind would depend on having stories keep being told about them. Yet another creature would need to keep consuming a certain food to stay alive.

I headcanon that Fae!Dick would irrevocably tie himself to Wayne Manor, the surrounding lands, and its occupants to keep himself alive. Which in return makes him very powerful! But also very vulnerable.

He would quite literally feel family members getting hurt, depending on the severity of the injury. His connection to the manor and the lands would mean that any kind of environmental poisoning or damage going on inside the boundaries of his “domain” would directly affect Dick, ranging from mild discomfort to a sort of “withering”.

If what happens was severe enough to cause Dick to become temporarily unaware of his surroundings then nature would react accordingly. If he’s outside manor grounds during this instance, then it would be mostly animals responding to his pain and attacking anybody in close vicinity he isn’t tied to. (Animals with very strange and discordant features)

If he’s inside manor grounds… the entire place becomes ground zero for “magical” activity. Nobody would be able to get in or out. Any kind of “demolishing” going on would be stopped by some very angry plants and animals.

… unless the damage to the lands is too great. In that case Dick wouldn’t be able to do much, and everything that is/was dependent on his magic to grow would quickly atrophy. :(

The family probably wouldn’t really know how to properly deal with it the first time it happens. Obviously there’s the physical repercussions of Dick’s injury they’d have to deal, which usually has roots in something else so treating it wouldn’t be like treating the flu or a paper cut. They’d have to find whatever is wrong with the land (or one of the family) to help Dick.

Of course there’s also the possibility of an other creature hurting Dick. Or a very lucky criminal manages to land a hit (maybe even with an iron bullet). In that case Dick would be looking at a much longer recovery period than a regular human.

Fae!Dick is very difficult to injure, but he’s also very slow to heal.

[strawberry-cowmilk]

Lucifer, diavolo,barbatos, separatly please! find out their lover fem mc is pregnant with their child if that's okay thank you!

Hi! That's so cute! I hope you like what I made of it

they find out mc is pregnant

-> lucifer, diavolo and barbatos x mc

mc is female, not proof read

content warnings: pregnancy, throwing up and really mild suggestive content (diavolo's part), mild angst but fluffy otherwise (lucifer's part)

-----

Lucifer

he notices the slightest change you go through very fast

it started with just sore breasts and fatigue, lucifer didn't think much of it because he knows pms might cause this

but then you started showing more suspicious symptoms and there was no period to be seen, lucifer already knew what time it was

still, he took you to a doctor just to make sure, and yep you were pregnant

honestly, he's pretty scared of becoming a father, he has tons of work to do and his brothers really hate him sometimes, what if he can't give the baby what they need?

lucifer never shared his worries though, he was excited to meet your child regardless and they kind of ebbed away with time

this man was already protective, but now he has evolved

you can't even carry a purse without him taking over, you don't have to go to rad if you don't feel like it and he brings you some sort of healthy snack every few hours

also he wants to rub your stomach 24/7 but, for now, pride prevents him from doing so, but he does it every time (he thinks) you're asleep

Diavolo

you were sick randomly one morning, and diavolo thought you just have the cold or flu

so he treats you as if you're sick, he lets you stay in bed and makes sure you're hydrated it's weird you don't have a fever, though

but you kept getting sick, especially in mornings, and seemed fine otherwise

one day, diavolo found string cheese at the supermarket and he came to show it to you, but you threw up at the smell

this is when he knew something weird was going on, he suspected pregnancy but he didn't want to get his hopes crushed if it turns out false

'barbatos, mc is sick and tired a lot, I brought her funny cheese but it made her throw up, I'm really worried'

well barbatos knew what you two did about a month ago, but sends a doctor your way just in case

oh diavolo is so excited for his baby when the doctors confirm your pregnancy

he's so excited you might have to stop him from hanging posters about it all over rad

he also holds your stomach a lot, in fact solomon figured out you were pregnant because diavolo kept hugging your middle when he came over to burrow barbatos' pan

Barbatos

well he probably saw it coming due to his powers

he knew he should not want this, it will stand in the way of work, but he can't help but smile at the thought of having a child with you

so he doesn't do anything to prevent it from happening, in fact, he tells diavolo you might get pregnant soon in the hopes he gets some off time

luckily diavolo is a nice boss, he gives his butler all the free days he wants

barbatos doesn't know if he should tell you though, he ends up not saying what he knows since you might want it to be a surprise

then comes the day you show him the positive test, that day is one of his best days ever

barbatos is prepared to give you a massage if anything is sore, he will make you ginger tea to help with the nausea and will find the finest quality mattress and pillows for you, plus you're absolutely not doing any work on his watch

barbatos doesn't check the future further after making sure you will be healthy, he wants the rest to be a surprise for himself too

[fox-bright]

Fifty-five symptomatic humans in Colorado.

This is not human-to-human transmission; this is probably simple human corruption. While they don't go into it, I think we can fairly comfortably assume that the workers were either undocumented, or incarcerated (y'know the US still has slavery, right?), and were not given PPE when they were told to cull known-infected animals. Because if they HAD been given proper PPE, there would not be any infections, much less what might be more than four dozen.

So far no one is hospitalized; so far symptoms are supposedly mild. But every human infection is potentially the one that makes it jump to being a pandemic-ready disease, and we just went from "there have been four H5N1 infections in the US ever" to "there have been nearly sixty this week."

[vibratingskull]

Hello!!!! Hopefully this witn come off as annoying (idk when you posted the tranw stranded fic btw because Tumblr won't show me-)

But- I beg you, if it's okey, could you please write part 3 of what happens after they're rescued 😭😭??? You don't have to if you don't want to! But my heart it just- AHHHH

😭😭😭

I love it, I screamed, 😭😭

Idk how to end this 😭

It is not annoying at all dear anon, it is in fact flattering that you liked this silly story to desire it to continue! 🤗🤗🤗

Part 1 - Part 2

ThrawnxF!reader

Tags : Angst/hurt, abandonment, medical examination, semi-descriptive birth

“Your blood pressure is good and the blood test came back correct.” The droid says, praising you with its weird chanting voice.

The droid takes the blood pressure monitor off your arm as you remain silent, eyes focused on the ceiling. 

“We will do an ultrasound.” The medic comes to you, their datapad in hand.

Another medical examination…

Since you all embarked on Thrawn’s ISD, the Chimaera, Thrawn's first order of business was putting you and Thaishi in the medical bay, subjecting you to numerous medical examinations.

Clearly he didn’t trust in the Frog people medicine a lot, and now that you had access to modern medicine again he immediately forced you two to run a battery of tests. Blood tests, shots, weighting, fetal heart rates, glucose tests, ultrasounds, scanners... The whole nine yards.

Thaishi was absolutely terrified. She never saw any droids, never saw the white blouses of the medics, never got any shots, never saw all of this machinery beeping all around and she was thrown in this white sterile room suddenly, getting stripped down to have nodes of a cardiac monitor on her little chest, getting manipulated all around to get her vitals checked. You would have run to her to console her if you weren’t plugged in to so many monitors yourself! But Thrawn stepped in, entering the bay after his long shift he immediately got to embrace and comfort her, hugging her on his laps when she gots her shots. The little sweetheart never saw a medical needle before, even less have it piercing her skin. She cried and whined with big tears on her cheeks, begging her father to not let the droids or the weird humans touch her. 

Thrawn cradled her, soothed her patiently with his deep melodious voice, singing her a Cheuhn lullaby to dry her tears and took care to explain to her in detail every medical procedure that was happening for her to understand and calm down. He remained with her during the end of her examination, holding her little hand or keeping her on his lap.

Unfamiliar with Chiss vitals, the medics compiled every data and asked Thrawn’s opinion on the results, making sure Thaishi was healthy and wasn’t at risk with the new germs her organism never encountered before. 

The results were very comforting, she was strong and healthy, only a very mild-case of flu resulting from the encounter of the human germs, but her antibodies were already at work. The shots would do the rest.

So tired from having screamed and cried so much, Thaishi fell asleep in Thrawn’s arms, hugging him tightly, so he came to you with her in his arms, caressing her back tenderly. You were still examined, laying on the sterile bed. He took and squeezed your hand, sitting down next to you, listening to your own results.

The baby seemed healthy, they grew very well, maybe just a heartbeat a little weaker than the norm, but nothing alarming said the medic. After listing everything up, the medic put on their most magnificent brown noser smile and asked.

“So, do you want to know the gender?”

You looked into Thrawn’s eyes and shrugged. He nodded, understanding.

“We will keep the surprise.” He announced.

“Oh… Okay…” The medic responded, disappointed to not be the one bringing good news to their Grand Admiral.

Once an Empire’s dog, always an Empire’s dog…

“ Lady (Y/n) needs peace and quiet.” The chief medic said, looking darkly at his intern to keep them moving.

Thrawn nodded again, careful of your and your baby’s health. He remained with you for half an hour, squeezing your hand, caressing your forehead, kissing your cheek and speaking sweet nothing to you.

But you didn’t let yourself get charmed.

You knew very well where that attitude came from.

Soon…

Soon they will come to take your children away and Thrawn will let you go, leaving you to go back to the Rebellion and resume war between you two.

And your family will definitely disappear, torn apart across the universe.

You looked straight into his carmine eyes, with a harsh gaze, trying to convey your strong will.

You still haven't forgiven him.

He only looked at you back with even more tenderness and his caress became even more softer, his thumb caressing your cheek tenderly.

“Do not look at me like that.” He invited softly, “You stab my heart.”

“You know very well what you did!” You retorted lowly but harshly to not wake up Thaishi.

“I know Ch’acah. But I needed to come back.”

You only frowned and remained silent, too tired to start an argument.

“The medics told me the baby was healthy.” He continues with his soft melodious voice, “You take such good care of them, thank you.”

“The village’s healer helped a lot.” You recalled him.

“We have true medicine now. My team will take over, do not worry about anything.”

“I was not worried back at the village!” You retorted. “Everything went well for Thaishi!”

“Here nothing will escape us.” He closed the matter. “Sleep, Ch’acah. Build up your strength, the term is close.” 

He kissed your forehead a final time before going back to his shift, not before dropping Thaishi in her new bedroom for the night.

How many hours did he already spend on the Bridge? No matter because he was ready to go back on duty immediately.

You spend the evening alone, eating alone at the grand table of the Grand Admiral suite. The plates were rich and expensive, worthy of Thrawn’s standing, but it had no taste for you. You got to bed early,  only to turn and turn in the bed, never finding sleep. You pretended to be deeply asleep 5 hours later when Thrawn slid silently in the bedroom, sneaking under the covers to hug you tight like he used to…

And days let place to weeks, traveling through space towards the Empire’s territory. Closer and closer to the end of your life… Thrawn buries himself in his work, sparing little moments for you and your daughter, while you spend all your time with the Frog people like those four years of bliss, when your family was whole. You did not waste any time to be an annoyance to the Imperials, making their days difficult, loudly advocating for the community’s rights on the ship, negotiating more spaces on the Chimaera, more time in the enlisted mess hall, freedom to come and go anywhere you please on the ISD, so on and so forth… Even if you have to recognize, the treatment of the community was royal in contrast to what you feared.

But apparently welcoming and taking care of a Grand Admiral for four years gives some rights on his ISD. You’re not delusional, you know that if they were any other alien community they would have traveled in cells. But Thrawn  would have never accepted his hosts to be treated like animals… So overall the Frog people have nothing to complain about, really.

That doesn’t prevent you from fighting for more to stick it up to those imperials.

And to their horror, you being Thrawn’s wife give your words weight and power here. A thing that seems to piss off Commodore Faro immensely.

She knows she is walking a thin  line with you, you may be a civilian but you are her Grand Admiral wife, she knows that if she says no too much you will go straight to Thrawn. So she does her best to mediate any situations to the best of her abilities.

It’s a shame she is an Imperial, she could do so much good in the Rebellion with her talents! But you know recruiting your husband’s officers will be a big no no! So you let her be.

Until you have another complaint to scream everywhere in the Chimaera!

So you actually rarely let her be.

To her utmost annoyance.

“The baby is fine.” The medic calls you back to reality. 

You blink, turning your head to the screen to observe your baby. You see them agitating themself inside your belly, giving little kicks and punches around.

“Do you want to listen to their heartbeat?” They ask.

You nod, putting on the headphones to listen to the little drum, beating rhythmically and you refrain from a sob.

What a wonderful sound…

The most wonderful music you ever heard with Thaishi’s laugh. You caress your tummy with your eyes glued to the screen to observe your sweetheart. The heartbeat is indeed weak, but you can feel it beat through your veins!

Your baby is determined to come into the world and meet you.

You know it!

“Can I get an ultrasound image?” You ask, trying to keep your voice stable. 

“I will send it immediately to the Grand Admiral.” The medic accepts.

You greet your teeth. You wanted the image for yourself, and share it with Thrawn later down the day. But they all tend to bypass you, only taking Thrawn’s desire and orders into account despite your pleas. ‘Are you sure the Grand Admiral would want this?’,’Grand Admiral Thrawn would never accept that!’, ‘I will ask Grand Admiral Thrawn’s opinion.’ and so on and so forth…

To them you may be their Grand Admiral wife but you’re also a lowly rebel and they have no qualms letting you know.

“We didn’t detect anything abnormal.” The medic announces, “You simply have a light iron deficiency. A slight change in your diet should mend your vertigo, no need to worry.”

“I am not worried.” You clap back, “Thrawn pushes me to come to the med bay at any signs of light weakness.”

“The Grand Admiral” He corrects, “... Simply wants to be sure his baby is healthy.”

You don’t like the emphasis on ‘his’.

“Well I know Our baby well, I knew nothing was wrong.” You retort.

You look black in each other's eyes in silence. 

Now you’re both pissed off.

“The images.” You order.

They sigh and shake their head.

“Right away…”

------------------------------------------

You stir your food with your fork.

This isn’t really good.

You lay down your fork and slouch on your seat, observing the mess hall reserved to the enlisted and ensign. There aren't a lot of people at this hour which is both a blessing and a curse. With so few people there are not many people to shoot you down with their gaze but you also cannot feel the lively and busy activity of a community, which is why you came here in the first place.

The frog people are not here anymore.

They have been disembarked on a planet of their choosing. You lost friends when Thaishi lost everything she ever knew. She hugged Lei really hard, refusing to let her go, her mother and you had to separate them. They both cried, refusing to say goodbye to their bestfriend. The Chiefs saluted you and Thrawn, thankful for letting them pursue their goal and having the opportunity to fly freely in the universe once again after a millenia. They shared a respectful handshake with Thrawn and pulled you into a hug, congratulating you again for Thaishi and the baby, promising to keep you in their hearts.

You would lie if you said you didn’t shed a tear as you saw them disappear on the planet surface, getting smaller and smaller as the Chimaera was flying away in space. Thaishi cried her eyes out and you had all the pain in the world to calm her down, hugging and cradling her.

You felt how the tension in the Chimaera’s crew suddenly lifted like a fog disappearing. 

Finally the weird alien community wasn't here to soil their precious Imperial ISD anymore!

You used to eat with them at noon in the enlisted mess hall, and now you’re all alone.

Without any friends and community on a ship with a crew that hates you, a busy husband and a dependant 4 year old child.

Busy… To not say outright absent.

Since you came inside the ISD Thrawn is consistently on the Bridge for long, long shifts. You only see him at noon one day out of 5 and feel him enter the bed past 3 or 4 a.m to rise back at 6 or 7 am. You're not dumb, you know he buries himself in his work to not face the fact that his family will soon not be anymore.

It was his idea to send your children to the Ascendancy,  and while he knows it in his heart to be the best solution it doesn’t alleviate the pain for all that.

So he works.

And works.

And works.

To the point that you feel like a single mother.

You sigh, massaging your temples when Karyn Faro appears in the mess hall, pissed off, holding Thaishi, in tears, by the hand.

“Lady (Y/n)!” She shouts, for everyone to hear.

“Thaishi!” You raise on your foot, “What happened, sweetheart? I thought you were sleeping already.”

Faro lets your daughter go and she sprints into your arms, burying her head in the crook of your neck.

“Your daughter entered the bridge!” Faro lets you know harshly, “This is not the place for a child!”

“I just wanted to see daaaaaaaaad…” Her little voice breaks down in terrible sobs. “I miss him!”

You hug her tight and caress her back soothingly.

“I hope it won’t happen again.” Faro bites.

“Or what?” You clap back, “What will you do? Throw her in a cell? She is 4 and the daughter of your Grand Admiral!”

She frowns harder and her nostrils flare and for a second you expect her to explode and scream her rage in your face and for everyone present to witness.

But she inhales and recovers her calm, speaking with a deadly cold voice.

“The Grand Admiral himself is asking you to make sure this incident does not happen ever again.”

She lets that sink in and you take the stab in your heart.

You look into each other’s eyes, angry and gauging the other down.

“I will speak with him about that.” You let her know.

“Dot that. In the meantime, keep an eye on your daughter, she could hurt herself roaming around the Chimaera like that. So many corners are treacherous…”

“Are you threatening my child?” You demand, ready to claw her throat, not believing what you’re hearing.

“I simply do not want to discover your precious child bleeding out in the machine's room.” She simply responds with a false smile.

She stands to attention and leaves you in the middle of the mess hall with your child in a mess.

You sigh. What a bitch.

You carry your daughter the best you can with your heavy pregnant belly to lay her down in her bed. She stopped crying but sniffs and sighs, her red eyes still wet with tears.

“I don’t like it here, mom…”

“What are you saying? You have a large bedroom just for you, you always complained you wanted your own space back at the village!” You try to make her see the good sides of the situation.

There aren't many, you admit…

Thrawn placed her in the bedroom next to the Grand Admiral suite, and you know in your heart he meant well. Thaishi complained so much to not have a bedroom for herself he thought she would be happy like that. And back where Lei and the other kids were here she could accommodate herself seeing her father less, but now she feels truly alone.

She sniffs loudly as you tuck her in her large, maybe too large bed, holding on to the covers.

“I miss Lei and everyone! Can’t we go back and take them back?” She pleads.

“No sweety.” You try to soothe her, “They resumed their nomad life. We do not know where they are now and we ourselves are heading towards our new home.”

“I liked the village!” She complains, “I don’t understand why we have to live on a ship!”

You caress a strand of hair out of her face tenderly.

“I know sweetheart. But you’ll see, you will meet a lot of children there, you’ll make a lot of new friends, go to school with a lot of kids, start a new life. Isn't it exciting?”

“Nooooooo…” She whines. “I liked how it was… And I don’t see dad anymore!”

“Didn’t you see him on the bridge?” You ask.

“I was immediately stopped by the adults.” She explains, “I called for dad but he didn’t even turn to me.” And she broke down crying again.

You lay next to her and hug your child tight, letting her wet your shirt with tears.

“Mum, I want to go home…” She cries,” Everyone is so mean here…”

You kiss the top of her head tenderly, pressing her against your chest, against your beating heart.

You didn’t tell her.

You couldn’t bring yourself to tell her that soon, once her sibling is born in less than three months, she will be sent away with them in the Ascendancy.

Never to see you or Thrawn again…

You start crying with her and you hug each other.

Mother and child alone in a cold bedroom on an hostile  imperial ISD, with the sole ending to be separated forever…

You end up sleeping with Thaishi in her bed, holding her tight in your arms. You don’t feel how someone comes inside the room to pull the covers back over Thaishi, kissing her cheek tenderly and lifting you up to carry you.

You wake up at the sensation of being cradled softly, only to meet white and a military plaque. You raise your head to see Thrawn, carrying you bridal style to your bedroom.

“Sleep, my sweet.” He softly orders, “You need to gather strength for the birth.”

“No.” You immediately step your food down, “No. We need to talk.”

He lowers his carmine gaze to you, but remains silent.

He enters the suite and heads towards the bedroom, only letting you go to lay you down your shared bed. As he rises back to go away you seize his arm immediately to force him to stay.

“No. You will not escape this conversation.” You warn.

He looks at your resolute gaze and sighs, sitting down on the edge of the bed, fixing the wall. You both remain silent for a moment, not knowing how to start. You get a quick glance to the alarm clock, informing you it was 4 am already.

“Thrawn…” You sigh.

“I know.” He simply says, “Believe me, I know.”

“You didn’t even turn to her?” You ask, flabbergasted. “She just wanted to see her dad.”

“I know, Ch’acah.” He admits, lowering his head lightly, “But I walk a thin line. I cannot let the most minuscule slip off happen.”

“She cried for two hours for Maker’s sake!” You start to feel ire raising in your blood.

“If I let them see anything, you three could get hurt.” He explains, “I am held at gunpoint, if I show any weakness towards any of you two they will devour us all. Thaishi and the baby included.”

“Another reason to defect.” You remark coldly.

“We already had this discussion, Ch’acah.” He patiently says.

“I know…” 

But that doesn’t mean you accepted the situation for all that! You can only see the good he could do if he joined the Rebellion, all the lives he could save and improve…

“I need the Empire’s resources.” He continues almost to himself, “Even if I have to make the sacrifice of myself.”

“Right now you are sacrificing your daughter. We barely saw you last month, you stopped eating with us, you come back to the bedroom when everyone is sleeping and rise back earlier than everyone else. I feel so… We both feel abandoned.” 

He lowers his head to fix his hands with intertwined fingers. He murmurs something so low you cannot hear it.

“What did you say?”

“I cannot face you both.” He repeats.

You look at the back of his head, how hunched over he is, how… fragile he seems at this very moment.

“The pain is too great.” He lets out in a breath, “Seeing you reminds me of what I will have to leave behind. Work helps me to forget, to not suffer for a few hours…”

“Is that why you take so many shifts? To avoid us?” You ask with a nicer tone.

“Yes.” He admits, raising his back straight, “I am a coward… It was my idea.”

“You’re not a coward.” You say softly, “But you are making a mistake, do not drive your daughter away from you. Thaishi needs her father to guide her, to love her.” You take his shoulder and squeeze it, “Please, do not turn your back on us…Thrawn, we need you as much as the Ascendancy needs you. Why can’t you see it?”

Thrawn turns to you to meet your gaze. You see so many emotions flashing in his carmine gaze despite his aloof expression.

“Do not reject us…” You beg.

He takes both of your hands to kiss your knuckles tenderly, reveling in your presence.

“I am sorry.” He finally says, “I indeed made a mistake. I put myself before the needs of Thaishi and the baby.”

“Stay with us tomorrow morning.” You propose, “Faro is competent enough for you to take half a day for yourself…” You squeeze his hands.

“Will you forgive me?” He asks, pleading with his eyes rather than his tone.

“Will you spare more time for Thaishi?” You ask.

“Yes. I will also accompany you to each of your medical appointments. I will spare you more time.”

You put your forehead against his, breathing deeply.

“Thank you…” You sigh.

His hand comes caressing your cheek delicately, tilting your head to capture your lips in an infinitely tender kiss. One since a long time ago… 

He kisses you lightly, like you could break at any moment and you respond, relieved to have your husband back.

At least for the three last months…

He leans forward to kiss your pregnant belly reverently, caressing it with his large palms, murmuring sweet nothing to your unborn baby.

“Hello you, I am back, sweet thing.”

You cannot help but smile, caressing his hair as he talks to your baby for long minutes. He finally rises to kiss you chastly.

“Sleep, cheo vir. It is terribly late.”

“Will you stay?” You demand, worried.

“Yes. I will.” He promises.

You nod lightly, satisfied for the moment. Thrawn helps you out to put on your pajamas, take off your shoes, gently massaging your sore foot. You sneak under the covers as Thrawn leaves the suite, promising to come back immediately.

He actually comes back with Thaishi, sleeping soundly in his arms and he lays her down next to you, kissing her forehead. You caress the tummy of your daughter as Thrawn takes his shower and comes into bed, Thaishi between you both.

He takes her delicately in his large arms and hugs her tight, a hug that she gives back eagerly despite being asleep. You stay awake a little more to admire this wonderful scene, father and daughter, hugging each other at last…

When morning comes you are relieved and pleased to see Thrawn sitting in bed, caressing Thaishi’s back softly as she sleeps still. You extend your arm and caress his cheek with your knuckles and he turns his head to you, a light smile coming to grace his lips as he sees you, eyes pouring love for you.

“Good morning, Ch’acah.”

“Hi you…” You smile back.

This moment is peaceful and tender, your whole family reunited.

But you both know.

It cannot last…

--------------------------------------------------

You groan, holding the low of your back. Your spine is crushed and your baby is kicking and punching relentlessly, preventing you from sleeping correctly for the last two weeks. 

Your term is not now, you still have two months to wait so your child just decided to get feisty with you. You remember how stressed you were with Thaishi, she kicked so little you started to fear she died in your womb. What a relief you felt when you heard her first scream.

Your baby may have a weaker heart but they appear determined to fight to live, and right now they’re fighting you.

You rise from your bed, in pain, feeling like you are about to wet yourself with how squeezed your bladder is. You walk slowly with very little step when you receive a formidable kick in the stomach.

“Ouch!” You groan, “You sure are full of energy, little one.” You laugh through the pain.

You enter the living room of the Grand Admiral suite to discover Thrawn trying to correct Thaishi's terrible table manners, and she seems too happy to give him a hard time now that she has his attention. They both turn to you, Thaishi with her mouth full, and greet you.

“Welcome, Ch’acah.” Thrawn immediately stands up to meet you, “Did you sleep well tonight?”

You sniff and purse your lips in response.

“No. Your baby keeps kicking me around.”

He presses his large palm on your stomach, circling your shoulders with his other arm. He smiles lightly as he feels a hit against his palm.

“They are so vigorous.” He notes, pleased, “They seem to be in a rush to be born.”

“You don’t say!” You huff, “They punch me all to their heart content.”

 He kisses your cheek with a low purr.

“I thank you for going through all of this for our family.” He praises you, “You amaze me everyday.”

You gulp discreetly. A family fated to disappear, sooner than later now… But you both keep the act before Thaishi, to preserve her. When she is not sleeping in your bed with the both of you, Thrawn is holding you all night long to comfort you and dry your tears. 

But you cannot cry in front of your daughter.

Thrawn wanted to tell her, but you formerly forbade him. You wanted for her to live as peacefully and fully as she could, without a ticking time bomb over her head and an imminent sense of doom. You just wanted her to live like any normal little girl.

“Thaishi, do not take such large bites” Thrawn chastises her, “You will choke yourself, little one.”

She looks at him defiantly, pushing another bite in her already full mouth, making her look like a hamster. Thrawn sits back in front of her to teach her while you serve yourself some caff. You groan again, folding forward when another kick comes punching your rib, cutting your breath.

“Are you alright, Ch’acah?” Thrawn asks, ready to jump into action.

You smile painfully, gesturing to him that this is nothing out of the ordinary as you come to sit to enjoy a breakfast with your little family.

Thrawn already filled your plate with your favorite, pushing it to you, intimating you to eat something. You wince, not hungry in the slightest with your stomach so squeezed.

“Be reasonable.” He says softly but firmly.

“Be reasonable, mum!” Thaishi repeats with her mouth full of brioche, “Be reasonable!”

You wrinkle your nose, but accept nibbling at your food to appease him. He took your plates away once you ate half of your portion, satisfied.

But if you had listened to yourself you wouldn’t have eaten a quarter of it.

“I must go.” Thrawn announces, putting on his white jacket, “Do you need help to dress first, Ch’acah?”

“Already?” You say, disappointed.

For the last month he took care to be more present in your life, staying as late as possible in the morning, putting Thaishi to bed himself even if it was in the middle of one of his shifts, helping you bathe or take a shower even after a full, long day of work and massaging your foot and shoulders before bed.

Faro holds you personally responsible for that, you could feel her shooting you with her glare furiously, but Thrawn was still the Grand Admiral of the ship, still efficient and hard working, never slipping off… So she has nothing against you, factually.

But today he wants to go way earlier than your new routine.

“This area is infested, I want to oversee any possible combat” He explains.

You immediately tense up.

Infested by who? The Rebellion?

You are ready to make a scene to prevent him from going to fight your comrades but he immediately understands your weird gaze.

“Pirates, Ch'acah.” He lightly smiles, “They are numerous in this part.”

You immediately relax.

“Oh… Okay. Good luck, love.” 

He leans forward to capture your lips in a surprising demanding kiss, you remain unresponsive for a moment, taken by surprise by such eagerness.

The birth is near, he is on edge as you are even if he hides it well.

“Urk…You are disgusting” Thaishi complains mockingly.

Thrawn and you both laugh at her reaction and he comes to kiss her cheek to say goodbye.She circles his neck with her arms and squeezes him tight.

Once he leaves the room, she immediately turns back to the table to take another bite, already throwing out what he was trying to teach her. So you lightly slap her hand away.

“No, young lady. Finish your plate first.”

She sticks her tongue out but finishes her plate nonetheless. You take a sip of your caff, observing your blue jewel in silence as she eats eagerly. She is growing and starving all the time, you have difficulty holding her in your arms now.

But not Thrawn.

He can still lift her and carry her like she weighs nothing. 

You remain still as you drink your cup, not showing how your baby is literally demolishing you from the inside, punching hard in your stomach. But when you have the guard of Thaishi you refuse to show your pain, you must be a strong mother for her.

But those kicks are really strong and… painful.

“What do you want to play this morning?” You ask her.

“I won’t have lessons today?” She asks with sparkling eyes.

You tuts, shaking your finger.

“Do not dream too much, young lady. You will do your homework as every other day, but today you can play a bit first.”

 She sighs in response but appreciates the prospect of games before lessons.

----------------------------------------------

You are in so much pain. It feels like a tool gripped your stomach and twisted it in knots before pulling on it like it was trying to rip it off of your body. You greet your teeth as you pretend to make your doll walk on the make believe doll house in the suite. Too lost in her game, Thaishi is fully focused on the figurines in her hands, mediating a negotiation between a client and a market gardener. 

You hold your stomach, breathing deeply through your nose. You ate something bad for sure.

“Mom?” Your jewel asks.

“It’s alright, sweety. Just dizziness, it will pass.” You smile through the pain, refocusing on the game of your little girl, you wouldn’t want to trample on the nascent romance between her dolls for anything in the universe!

Your doll is about to join the negotiation for some samara fruits when the entire Chimaera trembles suddenly and an alarm starts blaring out. Thaishi yelps in surprise and fear, losing her balance. You catch her in your arms and you hold each other tight.

“What’s going on?” She asks terrified.

“Pirates, most probably.” You answer calmly, trying to keep our own anxiety at bay.

“Are we… Are we going to die?” She raises her eyes round in fear up to you.

She never knew battles or war, and always lived a peaceful life in the village. You look into her eyes, flashing memories of your battles against Thrawn.

How he used to win with such talent and brio each time!

“No. No sweety.” You soothe her, “Your father is leading the battle. That means we are going to win.” You caress her back, pulling her on your lap.

“I am scared!” She whines, snuggling against your breast.

You hear people running in the attending corridor, the battle alarm still screaming in the loudspeakers. They are all rushing to battle.

“Thaishi, look at me.” You say authoritatively.

She looks up to you again with questions at the sudden change of tone, but listening carefully to you.

“Your father is the Grand Admiral Thrawn. Unbeaten and invincible.” You expose clearly.

She is way too young to know about all of that, no use to go into details, just enough to reassure her, “He is the tactical genius of this generation. There is no safer place in the Universe but his side. Do you understand me?”

You bite the inner of your cheek at how the humiliation you suffered at his hand, how many times you had to flee the battlefield to escape death and destruction. The long hours spent forming a new strategy that could take him by surprise.

To no avail.

Despite all your and your comrades efforts, Thrawn never showed any weakness in battle and wiped out all your attempts at assassination. 

If one could win no matter the odds, it is him.

“Do you understand me, Thaishi?”

She slowly nods, hugging you tighter. You smile comfortingly to her face soaked with tears and hug her.

“You have nothing to fear, my sweet. Your father is here to protect us.”

A light explodes outside of your bay window, a missile you determine, illuminating the bedroom harshly. You raise on your feet immediately to lower the blinds and protect your daughter from that spectacle but you don’t even take two steps you fall down on the ground, holding your stomach.

You’re in so much pain! You feel your blood boiling and flewing furiously in your spasming muscles.

What is going on?

“Mum? MUM?!” Thaishi runs to you.

You feel another contraction spasming your entire body and you gasp, all your air kicked out of your lungs.

“Mummy! Mummy!” She shouts, powerless, kneeling next to you.

She suddenly turns her head and jumps on her little feet and runs out of the room.

You’re in too much pain to just hear the battle outside or the commotion in the corridors. You bite your lower lips, drawing blood, curling over yourself pathetically on the carpet of the large bedroom when someone bursts inside the room.

You are suddenly being lifted up in the air and you cannot help a scream of pain in response. All your southern muscles are contracting and convulsing while you feel a wet and warm sensation spreading along your thighs, soiling your undergarment and dress.

Did your water…?

But it is too soon!

Way too soon!

The unknown officer, soldier or ensign is speeding in the corridors with you in their arms. Your baby had to come in the middle of a battle! 

When Thrawn is away.

They finally reach the med bay and enter without consideration for the other patient, shouting that the Grand Admiral’s wife was twisting in pain on the ground. You are being laid down on a bed as carefully as they can, a medic and a droid arriving at your side immediately.

“Her water broke.” The medic calmly says, “Let’s place her in the operation room.”

You wriggle on the mattress, each heartbeat getting more and more painful.

Your bed is pushed in a white, sterile room and someone transfuse you with something.

“Thrawn…” You gasp, “Where is Thrawn…”

“He is leading the battle, lady (F/n).” They coldly announce.

Where is everyone?

Why are you alone?

With Thaishi, Thrawn and all your friends were here to support you.

But today you are alone… In a cold room with droids and machines and imperials

Where did all of your life go?

You scream again as a new contraction stops all your thoughts. The medic chief enter the room, seemingly pissed off.

“What do you mean her water broke? The term is two months away!” He harshly announces.

“Labour started chief, she is fully dilated and the contractions get closer and closer.” Someone responds.

He hisses but takes his place as you wince in pain.

“Prepare an incubator! The baby is premature at 28 weeks, they will need intense care.” 

You close your eyes shut as a new wave of pain washes over you. 

“Thrawn! Where is Thrawn!” You demand.

“He cannot make it to you, lady (F/n). You will need to do it on your own.”

As to punctuate his words, the Chimaera is shaken again. The bed trembles, worsening your pain. You feel your sweat soaking your bed and dress.

It is so uncomfortable!

“Prepare everything, they may needs respiratory assistance, surfactant in an intubation tube. Their liver and kidneys aren’t formed yet. Keep an eye on the vitals and stand ready. Lady (F/n) you can push.”

“No! No, I want Thrawn!” You cry, “Where is he? He must be here!I can’t do it without-”

Someone slides their hands in yours and squeezes it tight and a female voice rises.

“He is fighting to keep us all alive. You must be strong and do it without him. We are all here to take care of your child, focus on your labor.”

You squeeze back her hand, the pain is so great the flashing white lights blind you completely, preventing you from seeing her face.

“We are all here for you right now!” She assesses.

You feel the tools pulling on your organs again, signaling you that you simply cannot wait for your husband to magically appear in the room and support you.

You’ll have to pass this trial alone.

So you start pushing, greeting your teeth and pressing her hand with yours with all your strength. You curse as the morphine is taking its sweet time to kick in, but you have no time! Your baby is coming now!

You scream as you push, feeling like your organs get tearing apparts in millions of shreds.

Maker, you forgot how hard it was…

You feel her circle your shoulders to help soothe you as you push.

“We have a head!” The medic announces, “Keep pushing, Lady. One last time!” 

You dig your nails in the metal bar you are holding and the soft hand of the woman supporting you and push hard!

“Come on!” She encourages?

You keep pushing and pushing, pain ravaging your inside.

Until you feel a mass passing through your inner muscles. And suddenly…

Silence.

No liberating scream of a baby.

Just dead… silence.

“Install the respiratory assistance and put them in the incubator, we must stabilize their temperature.” The chief orders around.

You feel dizzy and weak but still have the sense that something went wrong.

“My baby…” You moan, “Give me my baby…”

“They must go into intensive care immediately. Your job is to rest and prepare to take care of a premature baby.”

Your bust fall with a ‘oof’ on the bed, too tired to do anything anymore.

“Good job!” The woman congratulates you.

You turn your head lazily to her, and open your eyes round in surprise.

“Commodore Faro?” You ask, bewildered.

She nods in response.

“What are you doing here?” you ask at the end of your rope.

“I was running to the bridge when your daughter burst out the Suite in tears, screaming at the top of her lungs that you fell. I simply carried you here.” She explains.

You lose all your words.

She hates you.

Why would she do that? Why would she help you?

“But…” You shake your head, weak with the loss of blood.

“Grand Admiral Thrawn would have killed me if I turned my back on you at that moment.” She simply explains. “He could forgive me for not reaching the bridge for a battle, but not for me not helping you, especially when you are giving birth.”

“It… It doesn’t make any sense…” You insist.

“Because you’re weak and dizzy.” She finishes.

“Thaishi… Where is my daughter!?” You have a flash of clarity in your fogged mind.

“I ordered an officer to take care of her in the the Grand Admiral suite. She is well.”

“Go get her…” You order weakly, “She must be so worried I left her, my jewel… My daughter…”

She prevents you from trying to stand up, pushing you back gently against the bed.

“I’ll ring the officer, do not worry. I-”

She is shushed by the door opening.

Thrawn enters, immediately spotting you. He places himself at your side and takes your hand, caressing a strand of hair out of your face.

“Ch’acah. How are you?”

“Tired… The baby…”

“Is in intensive care, I know. I am sorry I was not here, my love. I failed you.”

“My baby…” You feel tears coming back, “They didn’t let me hold my baby… I want them in my arms…”

He presses his forehead against your, caressing your cheek tenderly.

“Be patient my love. The medics are taking care of them.”

He rises back up and turns to Faro. She stands to attention immediately.

“I thank you, Commodore Faro.” He ceremoniously says, “Thanks to you, my wife and baby are safe.”

“Of course, Grand Admiral.” She respectfully bows her head, “How did the battle go?”

“Very well. Some resistances that held on against us, but we rose on top.”

“As always with you, Grand Admiral. I will take my shift if you don’t need me anymore.”

“Of course, Commodore.”

They nod to each other and she leaves. Thrawn turns back to you and sits on the edge of the bed.

“Ch’acah.” he starts, “You must have been scared.”

You wipe your tears off, sniffing.

“I want my baby.” You insist weakly.

“I want to see them too.” He assures you gently but seriously, “But we cannot right now. Rest a little, it was a lot of emotions for you.”

“Stay with me!” You demand, afraid he would leave you now.

“Of course. I left the bridge to my officers and Faro will take command for now. I can remain with you.”

---------------------------------------------

Your eyes are fixed on your baby inside her incubator.

Your sweet little girl.

Your little warrior.

Nothing is yet won, so much could still go wrong. But she is taken care of. Thaishi is pressed to the incubator, observing her little sister intently, absolutely hypnotized by the blue baby sleeping soundly.

“Do not poke the incubator, sweety. Let your sister rest.” You say, laying in your bed.

You’re still in the med bay in a private room. You refused to sleep away from your premature baby. You wanted to be here at any signs of illness or bad reaction, to jump into action at any bad signs. Besides, you have been judged too weak to leave yet.

Thaishi stops poking and jumps in the bed to slide between your arms, snuggling against you.

“What’s her name again?” She asks.

“Thauko.” You say again with a little smile.

“Thauko…” She repeats lowly, “Why is she in that weird crib?”

“She is premature, she needs a lot of care.”

“Premature?” 

“She is born too soon, her development hasn’t stopped yet.”

“Is that… Bad?” She asks with her years old words.

“Yes… But we have skillful medics and she is a Chiss, like you. She will survive.” You say assertively.

You both remain silent, eyes fixed on the incubator, listening to all the machinery helping your baby staying alive. You sigh and bury your nose in Thaishi’s hair to inhale her scent for comfort.

That’s when Thrawn decided to enter your room.

“Daddy!” Thaishi shoots, already forgetting your demand to remain quiet for the baby.

“Thaishi, my little one.” He takes her in his arms, “Did you come to visit your little sister?”

She puts and winces, displeased.

“Yes, but she doesn’t move, she only sleeps! That’s so boring!” 

He chuckles lightly in response.

“It is normal, she needs to build her strength to grow and heal.”

“Well it’s boring!” She insists.

He comes to the incubator, passing a hand through one of the designated holes to gently, tenderly caress the tummy of his baby. You observe him observing his daughter with so much love in his gaze. She wriggles at the warm sensation of his large palm on her body, her tiny, tiny hand trying to seize one of his fingers to keep him here.

“Hello, Thauko.” He salutes her respectfully, like he would an adult. “My brave and courageous daughter.” He says almost to himself.

“Our little warrior.” You add with a sad smile.

“Indeed.” He hums approvingly.

You cried in his arms, terrified for the life of your daughter. But he remained assertive that she would survive, that you will all surpass that trial together. He was so adamant you had no choice but to get convinced that she would make it, no matter the odds.

But that is how he operates. Always choosing hope no matter what.

The feeble baby seems to burp, trembling in the crib with tubes in her little nose.

How much would you give to be able to hold her against yourself, to hug her tight and shower her with love and warmth. 

But your human body isn’t warm enough for her, preferring Thrawn’s warmth. He delicately grazes her plump cheek with his knuckles, blue skin on blue skin.

You silently admire that scene.

Your husband giving love to both of your daughters, hugging one and caressing the other gently. He retracts his hand off the incubator to leave your baby at peace and his gaze travels to yours.

“They are coming.” He simply announces.

You shudder.

He needs not to precise who, you know very well who he is talking about.

But now?!

In this situation?!

Did he lose his mind?

“With a premature baby?!” You demand, digging your nails in the cover.

“They have been properly warned and prepared in consequence.” He continues, “They are en route.” 

You open your mouth to retort but Thaishi beats you to it.

“Who’s en route?”

Thrawn affirms his grip on her body and turns his gaze to her, deadly serious.

“The Chiss Ascendancy.” He explains, “They come to pick you up.”

She tilts her head slightly, not understanding.

“I thought we were heading towards an Empire?”

“Me and your mother. You and Thauko will go your own way.”

She remains silent for a second, like she failed to understand.

“...What?” She asks with a trembling voice.

You give Thrawn a black look, warning him to keep his mouth shut but he slightly shakes his head to you, telling you he made his decision. He comes to sit on your bed, keeping her in his arms.

“Thaishi, you and your sister will join the Chiss Ascendancy. You will grow there and become adults, form your own families and serve the Ascendancy at the best of your abilities. This is for your safety.”

“You are coming with us… Right?” She inquires.

“No, my jewel.” He informs her, “Me and your mother have unfinished business at the Empire. Dangerous business, improper for children so young. The Ascendancy will welcome you, raise you and educate you in civilized ways. You will join a new family and walk towards a brighter future that we could not give you here.”

Her little hand that held his sleeve fall down to her side, gawking.”

“You will… abandon us?” Her voice is toneless with incomprehension and fear.

You rise in a sitting position to hug her.

“No, my sweet, no. We pondered this situation, this is the best solution for your safety. Our… respective works could never permit us to meet your needs and offer you a stable family. You would only suffer.”

“But… But… I don’t want to go…” She insists

“We know, little one.” He continues, “And we do not want to let you go either. But your safety and well being is our ultimate priority, the best solution is to send you to the Ascendancy.”

“But… No… No!” She decides, shouting, “I don’t wanna go! I wanna stay!” She starts punching his arms but he easily seizes her little fists to stop her as she cries.

“This is for the best, Thaishi. You may not understand now, but once you grow you will accept and recognize our decision was for the best.” He asserts.

She wails and screams and cries, refusing to calm down.

He hugs her tight, preventing her from punching and hurting herself, his head resting on her own little head.

“I don’t wanna! I wanna stay! Why are you abandoning us!?”

You press yourself against her, both of you holding her, letting her express her frustration, anger and fear through her tears and whines.

Your heart bleeds at those odious sounds. You only want to hear her laughs and giggles, those sounds are just so painful to you.

“They are coming to bring you to a better future.” He gently insists, “You will understand one day.”

“I wanna stay with you!”

“Once an adult, you will be free to come back and meet us once again. We could talk longly about anything you so desire. But before that, you will remain safe in the Ascendancy.” He keeps talking with his melodious, soothing voice.

You all three remain in a tight hug, consoling Thaishi, knowing the scars on her heart will take years, i not decades to heal.

----------------------------------------------------

Your legs tremble, feeling like jello. Thaishi holds on to your hand like a buoy in the open sea. Thrawn remains stills next to you, his hands clasped behind his back as always.

Before you a large Corvette is slowly opening its ramp.

Thashi digs her nails in your flesh when the ramp hits the floor, revealing Chiss with hard gazes. They silently and haughtily descend to join you, like they own the place.

Thrawn takes a step forward, with a respectful and polite expression.

“Admiral Ar’alani, I hope your travel was safe and good.” He asks in Sy Bisti.

“Grand Admiral Thrawn.” She responds coldly, “It was uneventful, which is quite surprising. Where are they?”

You flinch, squeezing Thaishi’s hand in yours. Thrawn take a step to the side, designing you two to his fellow Chiss. She walks up to you assuredly, gauging you up and down.

“I assume you are the mother.” she continues in Sy Bisti.

By instinct you place yourself before Thaishi, feeling yourself trembling before that woman. Her gaze lazily falls on your daughter, observing her intently.

“What is your name?” She demands.

Thaishi hides behind your leg and you caress her head.

“Your name, child!” She insists harsher.

“Thaishi.” You interject, trying to appease her, “Her name is Thaishi.”

“Thaishi…” She repeats before turning towards Thrawn, “The Mitth will not appreciate that name.”

“I fail to see why?” He responds, tilting his head slightly.

“Of course you don’t.” She turns back to you and your child, “Thaishi of the Chiss, it is time for you to say your farewell and come with us!”

You feel your daughter flinching behind you, oressign herself tighter behind you.

“A moment…” You ask, kneeling to her.

The woman named Ar’alani breathes through her nose and joins Thrawn to speak with him in Cheuhn. Your level isn’t good enough to understand the discussion.

You look at Thaishi, checking the zipper of her coat was up.

“Are you ready?” You ask softly.

She shakes her head.

“No… I don’t wanna go.”

“I know, my sweet. But it is for the greater good. You’ll see, everyone will be like you there, you’ll make a lot of friends and have a lot of fun.” You try to smile at her.

“But you will not be with me.”

“Thauko will be with you. Take care of your little sister, you are the eldest, she will need you.”

She sniffs in response.

“Mom… Can’t I stay?” She tries to plead again.

“Oh my sweet, I don’t want you to go either. But you would never be in security with us.”

You take her in your arms.

“Mum…” She insists.

You look into her red eyes. You see she is trying really hard to be strong and assured but you feel how close she is to broke. You squeeze her in your arms, reveling one last time in her.

“I love you so, so much Thaishi. Never forget that, please.”

She buries her head in the crook of your neck.

“It is time.” Thrawn announces, coming closer to you.

He kneels to Thaishi, holding her cheeks in his large hands.

“Thaishi, be strong. Obey the adults and work hard, do not neglect your education and look over your younger sister.” He says assuredly, the last orders from a father to his child, “I love you.”

He hugs her and she hugs him back, circling his neck with her little arms. You look at them, refraining a sob. You raise your head as you hear the wheels of the incubator, you stand up and press your hands against the glass, observing your baby.

You rarely had the occasion to hold her in your arms, she so rarely got out of the incubator. You gently take her out and kisses her forehead tenderly. Thrawn come caressing her head delicately and kisses her cheek. You press her against you one last time and put her back inside the incubator.

“Let’s go.” Ar’alani says, taking Thaishi’s hand and pulling her towards the corvette.

The Human medic pushes the incubator to who you assume to be a Chiss medic that take it and roll it towards the ship. Thaishi nervously turns back to you, falling behind Ar’alani.

“Mum.” She calls.

You wave at her, trying your best to smile comfortingly, hiding the pain you feel deep inside you.

“Mum…” This time her voice cracks.

She pulls on her hand, freeing herself and runs back to you. You immediately lower yourself and embrace her. Ar’alani looks at her, flabbergasted.

“Thaishi.” You broke.

“Mum!” She cries. “Don’t let them take me! Mum!”

You squeeze her hard in your arms when you feel getting snatched away from you. Ar’alani stands back up, holding Thaishi in her arms and turns back to the ship.

“Mum! Dad!” Thaishi screams at the top of her lungs, extending her hands to you, “Dad!”

You feel Thrawn kneeling next to you, circling your shoulders, as much to comfort you as to prevent you from running after your children.

“Mum!”

You dig your nails in Thrawn’s flesh, fighting the urge to sprint after that Chiss woman and take back your daughters with your teeth and fists.

“MUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUM!” You hear her final scream as the ramp closes back on them.

And then the Corvette takes off…

And disappears away.

And you break.

In a million pieces.

You scream, clawing at Thrawn that tries to keep you whole. You tear up his uniform in your pain, tearing his blue skin to blood.

But he holds on.

Embracing you in his large arms, caressing your hair, speaking sweet nothing in your ears.

But you are just deaf to his words.

And you cry.

Suddenly your fight for the Rebellion feels so insignificant, and you wish you would have gone with your children.

Thrawn opens your collar for you to breathe better as you wail, cradling you tenderly.

“Breath, Ch’acach.” He tries to calm you down, “They will be safe there, not harm will come to them. Breath.”

You sob and gasp, right in the middle of a panic attack. Thrawn caresses your cheek with the back of his hand, holding you close.

“Calm down, (Y/n). Calm down.” He keeps chanting lowly, only for your ears. “I am with you.”

Your mouth is open to swallow big bowls of air but they never reach your lungs, getting stuck in your throat.

“Today I am with you to catch you.” He continues gently.

But he wont be for long anymore… In less than a week you will reach the Empire's territories and he will let you go back to the Rebellion.

And you will be alone.

@bluechiss @thrawnalani @justanothersadperson93 @al-astakbar@thrawnspetgoose @readinglistfics @elise2174 @debonaire-princess @twilekchiss @pencil-urchin @ineedazeezee @mssbridgerton @dance-like-russia-isnt-watching @Cortisolcosplay @obbicrystaleo @germie2037