#::Player speaking

[callonpeevesie]

I'm onto something I'm telling you

[apollos-boyfriend]

i trust we’re all mature enough now so can i just the say philza ace race incident? genuinely one of the funniest fucking things to ever come out of mcc. it’s up there it’s the mcc7 battle box incident. so many grown adults decided to ignore the actual track signals because of their immutable trust in philza minecraft and i think that’s beautiful

[yuwuta]

JJK OLYMPICS OHHH YOURE A GENIUS

head spinning w sooooooo many athlete aus rn….. 

satoru honestly isn’t half as cocky as the media makes him out to be but he could be because you bring up world champion men’s freestyle swim times and it’s his name on the scoreboard ten times before someone else shows up. he’s faster than himself by fifteen seconds all around, he’s earned a bit of cockiness. mentioned in the last post that whenever he’s at a competition and he finishes a race, he looks at the camera and signs a little infinity sign and then blows a kiss to you. some bitter old coach always calls him out on it, and gets him fined for unsportsmanlike conduct, and he’s happy to pay the fees if it means getting a message home to you, but eventually you two come up with a new code; and at his next race, he places gold, turns to the camera, crosses his middle finger over his pointer finger and smiles. when he’s in his post-race interview, he makes sure to explain that he does it for you with the widest smile on his face.

megumi nepotism baby but not in the same sport. toji was a multi gold medalist back in his heyday for shooting, so it’s not really a surprise to anybody that megumi has scary good aim, but he takes to archery instead of shooting. actually the idea of megumi being an emo little kid and throwing rocks at a tree when his dad pissed him off his hilarious, and even funnier is toji watching him, slightly amused and a little scared because megumi is maybe six and hitting the exact same spot every single time. he grows to be very blase about it—it’s more of a release/hobby for him that he happens to be really good at, and well, now good enough to earn a few olympic medals. megumi is not a fan of having his dad ruffle his hair on international television after he’s won, but he supposes it can’t be helped.

i don’t know where to put yuuta…. tennis…. tempting….. him in his little white shorts…. little grunts after he serves…. cries….. a complete 180 in his personality when he’s playing vs doing anything else. so charming and sweet and kinda shy when he’s being interviewed, and the second he steps on the court his eyes are so cold it’s scary…. need him… extremely nerdy about his rackets, and shoes, and clothes, and rambles to you about aerodynamics and posture and torque whenever you ask him to teach you, and you always have to shutup him up with a kiss and remind him that yeah you sort of want to learn to play tennis for him, but mostly you came bc he looks hot doing it. once he got asked in an interview if he ever thinks about you while he’s playing and his response was very concise, “no, never. it would be a big distraction,” and did not realize the implications of his heavily televised words. 

also…. not to make this post 40% yuuta but we could pull from canon a bit and make his sport fencing. he doesn’t excel because he’s the strongest, it’s because he’s learned to treat the sword as an extension of himself and a good strategist… also because i like the image of him pulling the helmet/mask off and shaking his hair out………..

don’t even know where to put yuuji…. volleyball? basketball? track and field??? the irony of him easily being the most athletic but canonically does not want to play sports 😭 but i can see him playing a sport because someone scouts him and it turns out to be a way to make steady money to support himself and his grandpa :( by the time he’s qualified and made it to the olympics, wasuke is doing much better (thanks to yuuji having landed some preemptive sponsorships and being able to afford better medical care), but not so well enough that he can travel across the world to watch yuuji play. wasuke tells you that you should travel and be with yuuji, but yuuji is so touched by the idea that you would stay with his grandpa and be by his side when he’s away :(( he wins gold, of course, and he doesn’t even wait until the closing ceremony—which, he’d mentioned in all of his interviews, so nobody can be too upset. he’s on record saying, “i’m excited to play, but i’m even happier to be going home. my girlfriend and my grandpa are watching me and i miss them!” several times— he’s on the first flight home with flowers, and tears in his eyes. puts his gold medal on his grandpa’s neck as a thank you, and spends probably thirty minutes straight hugging you and kissing you and honestly don’t put it past him to propose now that he’s got nike ambassador money 

nanami started judo as a way to relieve the stress of his overbearing job, and someone at the gym/training center notices he seems to be a natural despite being a beginner. he starts to draw a crowd, which annoys him at first because the point of judo was discipline and release from having to deal with too many people at his office job, but nanami supposes he can’t be too mad when you introduce yourself as a talent scout and offer him professional training. there’s irony in him accepting your offer, because it was definitely not based in professionalism at all… quitting his job as a salaryman to become a professional athlete in his mid-twenties was not on his bingo chart, but if it means he will have met you, then so be it. you’re with him all the way, through his training, competitions, world championships, qualifiers, all the way until he’s on the podium. you’re the first to congratulate him, but he interjects by telling you he’s quitting. you ask him why—he just won at the olympics for crying out loud, but nanami just shakes his head, puts down his flowers and his medal so his hands are free to hold your face and tell you, “it would be unethical to kiss my manager, so i am quitting.” (later, when everything is said and done, and you two are cuddling, you mention to him that he could just hire a new manager, and not quit his new career, to which he blushes because yeah… that’s probably more rational, but rational was not in his train of thought at the time)

[hauntedppgpaints]

Hottest Player on Each Team Poll Results!!

GOOOOOOD MORNING HOCKEYBLR!

I've got the piping hot results of the poll I posted last week, served fresh and ready to be read! The final count was 319 submissions!

TOP 10 ACROSS THE LEAGUE:

Leon Draisaitl, 215 points

Mat Barzal, 188

Nico Hischier, 178

Roman Josi, 167

Jeremy Swayman, 153

Matthew Tkachuk, 152

Claude Giroux, 138

Alex Lyon, 123

Sidney Crosby, 119

Brady Skjei, 114

Detailed tallies, pie charts, fun facts, and odd answers are below the cut! Sorry about how the teams are paired together, there's a 30 image limit on posts :(

DUCKS

one of two teams to have both goalies in their top three, the other being the Jets

19 unique answers

Funny other answers included: jamie drysdale rip, Donald Duck, Travis

BRUINS

22 unique answers

one person put Patrice Bergeron

SABRES

20 unique answers

2 people put Erik Johnson

weird answer: that one teenager that Tanger beat up

FLAMES

24 unique answers

2 people put Chris Tanev, one person put "it was hanifin"

HURRICANES

21 unique answers

BLACKHAWKS

23 unique answers

one person wrote Jonathan Toews. one person wrote Tommy Hawk, the team's mascot

with 13 of them, the blackhawks take the lead with the most non-answers. one of them was "skipping racist logo team". another was "this team is ugly".

AVALANCHE

23 unique answers

BLUE JACKETS

25 unique answers

STARS

19 unique answers

someone put "Nick Robinson" as an answer. that's not a player. i don't know who that is.

RED WINGS

18 unique answers

someone put "the ginger". someone else put "that cat guy"

OILERS

20 unique answers

someone put "anyone but Leon"

PANTHERS

27 unique answers

KINGS

21 unique answers

someone put Wayne Gretzky

WILD

23 unique answers

2 people put Connor Dewar. 1 person put Brandon Duhaime. 1 person just wrote "Bordeleau"

CANADIENS

21 unique answers

One person put PK Subban. One person put Chris Wideman

PREDATORS

17 unique answers

One of the weirdest answers across the whole poll: "they all looked pretty ugly when they beat the pens in OT that one time"

DEVILS

21 unique answers

someone put "one of the hughes kids"

ISLANDERS

17 unique answers

RANGERS

24 unique answers

one person put Henrik Lundqvist

SENATORS

16 unique answers

one person put "not that one guy"

FLYERS

20 unique answers

One person put Claude Giroux. One person put Nolan Patrick. 5 people put Gritty

PENGUINS

16 unique answers

SHARKS

28 unique answers

4 people put Anthony Duclair. 1 person put Tomas Hertl

KRAKEN

22 unique answers

1 person put Buoy

BLUES

22 unique answers

someone said "anyone but the goalie"

LIGHTNING

21 unique answers

MAPLE LEAFS

24 unique answers

another weird answer: "that sid lookalike kid mitch or marner or something"

COYOTES/UTAH

23 unique answers

one person put Jason Zucker

CANUCKS

23 unique answers

one person put Clayton Keller. one person put "that weird luke kid"

GOLDEN KNIGHTS

28 unique answers

one person put Nolan Patrick. one person put "Steve Aoki #77". Steve Aoki is a DJ. There is no #77 for the golden knights. i have no idea where this came from.

CAPITALS

22 unique answers

JETS

one of two teams to have both goalies in their top three, the other being the Ducks

26 unique answers

one person put Jesse Pollock. :|

FUN STATS!

2 teams are tied with the most amount of single-vote answers: the Rangers and the Panthers both had 10 players only voted for once.

4 teams are tied with the least amount of single-vote answers: the Senators, the Penguins, the Lightning, and the Maple Leafs all had 2 players only voted for once.

2 teams are tied with the most amount of unique answers: the Sharks and the Golden Knights both had 28 unique answers

2 teams are tied with the least amount of unique answers: the Senators and the Penguins both had 16 unique answers

Unsurprisingly, the top three teams that have the biggest gap between first and second place are the Oilers (195 points), Islanders (149), and Devils (145)

The top three teams with the closest gap between first and second place are the Sharks (2), Ducks & Canucks (3), and Blue Jackets & Blackhawks (4)

7 teams have a goalie in 1st place: Jets, Sharks, Wild, Red Wings, Blue Jackets, Bruins, and Ducks

18 teams don't have a goalie in their top three. Shame.

the team with the oldest 1st place is the Wild, with Marc-Andre Fleury being 39 years old

the team with the youngest 1st place is the Sabres, with Owen Power being 21 years old

A breakdown of first place nationalities:

Canadian: 15

American: 10

Swiss: 3

Swedish: 1

Latvian:1

German:1

Dual citizen (Swedish/Canadian): 1

[shima-draws]

Kieran has me in a chokehold. His character arc is so GOOD. You can tell that his bitterness and anger doesn’t just come from everything that’s happened to him recently. It’s pretty obvious that he’s been living in Carmine’s shadow for a LONG time and she’s always kinda treated him badly. But it wasn’t until the player character came along that he was finally able to voice that in his own way;; Just when he thinks he’s made a true friend in someone, someone that can and will stand up to his sister and is able to defeat her in battle (which inspires him to start speaking up for himself more), Carmine steals them away. And that’s a big betrayal to him. He clearly has self esteem issues which leads to him thinking that Carmine was talking shit about him behind his back and getting the player to believe that he wasn’t worth being friends with. And that makes him think both of them were laughing at him and making fun of him. And THEN the player goes and takes the last thing that Kieran has, the last thing he truly cares about: Ogerpon. It’s no wonder he got so frustrated and petty and lashed out 😭 Still breaks my heart to see but they did a really good job showing that progression of him losing more and more of his patience with Carmine. And him generally feeling like everything he cares about is being torn away. And losing to the player over and over just makes things WORSE. He’s not strong enough to beat them, he’s not strong enough to stand up to his sister, he’s not strong enough to be worthy of Ogerpon, he’s not strong. He needs to get stronger. Stronger and stronger and stronger.

GODDDD. He’s going to live rent free in my brain forever now. I can’t wait to see the direction they take with him in The Indigo Disk

[fatuismooches]

Silly thought: What if the Traveller accidentally kidnaps Dottore's lover?

This will happen way before they meet them. The Traveller somehow, is able to sneak into the main lab of the Doctor and finds his test-subjects. Of course being the hero that they are, releases them and offers them refuge in the Teapot (I'm still pissed that the Teapot is hardly mentioned in main story quests it could be a Trojan horse but nooo)

They come across this 'test-subject' who has heavy security for some reason. Determined to not leave anyone behind, they break through the defences to get to the hapless 'civilian.'

The Traveller gets there and takes away the 'test-subject', the Traveller hopes that they wake up once they are in the Teapot.

[Dottore's spouse wakes up from their refreshing nap and finds themself in a completely different place with a lot of strangers. Why are Dottore's test-subjects out? Actually - where even are they?!

And Dottore returns to an empty lab 😋 rip to the Traveller. Dottore is going to rip Teyvat from the ground up and he wouldn't find his spouse until the Traveller makes the connection.]

The Traveler thought that they had prepared to the fullest, heading into Dottore's lab. Carefully scoping it out, even managing to get their hands on the mapped layout somehow, observing the patterns and schedules of the guards and agents who seemed to be placed everywhere... general sneaky stuff, that wasn't nearly as easy as it sounded as this had to do with the Doctor after all. Nothing was ever simple when it came to the Harbinger, but despite all odds, they got lucky, only because the segments were no more and they chose a day Dottore himself was not there (that was also painstakingly planned). Of course, once the Traveler successfully completed their mission and freed all those poor souls, they felt rather good about themselves. Any plan of the Doctor's thwarted was always a good thing.

When the Traveler comes across such someone so highly tucked away, they automatically assume the worst! You must be an invaluable test subject who provides him great research but through immeasurable pain (just look how tired you were)... one that he can't keep his eye off! What a terrible fate you've been subjected to, one at the hands of the mad Doctor! Worry not, the Traveler will save you (not)!

...However, the blond failed to obtain information on a very, very important factor - the little-known soft spot of Dottore.

Now poor you, expecting to wake up to a familiar ceiling and maybe even your husband's embrace, but instead the sky above is more blinding than anything you've witnessed in years. And there's a strange bird floating spirit thing. AND the infamous Traveler and Paimon are worrying over your well-being... even more so when you start getting overwhelmed knowing you're far, far away from Dottore.

Now of course, test subjects are just test subjects and although losing them was a waste, he could always procure some more. You, however, was a completely different story. Needless to say, the agents are quite scared to go near the Harbinger as they've rarely seen him in his state - absolutely silently seething. The only way to salvage the situation is that the Traveler just needs to hope a hair hasn't been touched on your pretty head.

(Cue the freak out between Paimon and them once they realize the truth. Even still, the Traveler is semi-convinced you might be brainwashed or something - the whole Akasha terminal thing in Sumeru was enough proof. They're a bit reluctant to hand you over but seeing the way you bolt toward the Doctor was enough to convince them...)

[metanarrates]

new shifting mound dialogue... she's so real for this one

[brewerssupplies]

Why did no one tell me there's a bard subclass in the new handbook that lets you do the macarena at someone until they die?

[anneapocalypse]

That one poll got notes again and I was forced to remember that someone said the words "There are no non-obvious mechanics in Duty Finder content" on my post.

In the first alliance raid series there is a mechanic where 1/3rd of the players need to get magically shrunk and eaten by a dog.

[ratatatastic]

"we're skatin' matt, we're skatin'! you're good, you're good! runnin' her out, goes hard, loves to talk! youre good! BREATHE BABY BREATHE!!!"

always have a mic on paul at all times if this is how he talks to his players after their shift ends oh my god

edmonton oilers @ florida panthers game 2 | 6.10.24 (x)

[average-hua-cheng-fan]

i drew this!

[song-of-baldy-ron]

Top 6 most relatable moments in Bells Hells

[fairie-bread]

jannik + fox plushies can be something so real and personal

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

Idk if anyone else has pointed this out,,,but in Pressure our Expendable/Prisoner character seems to be "disconnected" from us the player (like an Undertale/Deltarune situation).

Just judging by the text that precedes an Angler attack or when certain actions are executed (inserting batteries), the Prisoner seems to be aware that we're controlling them and dying over and over again--which has made them pessimistic towards us (and snarky at times, too)

There was one where they call us "stupid" for trying to interact with something but I forgor what that was...

But man getting the Underwater Hazards file was pain bc it goes from "uh oh there's critters all over your body" to-

Yeah

They're out here suffering while we're just trying to collect all the badges/documents,,,,,

Seems like the Expendable is both prisoner to Urbanshade and to the player's control

[squuote]

had an idea come to mind where stanley used to be able to talk before being in the parable. and the shock to come when any sound from him is blocked off entirely

[elfcollector]

I feel ill. All the fools and villains who ever fell for my ploys, they're — they're here!