#/sarcasam

[copper-dragon-in-disguise]

Why are you not supposed to show your face online?

-?

personal safety. i forget exactly what they said in the online safety classes they made you (me) take in elementary school, but its for the same reason you're not supposed to share your full name (or any name at all! make up a name and stick with it, or hey, its the internet, lie about your name and your age and say you're a math major from connecticut named matt, or something! i ain't gonna stop you! have fun with it!) and address and social security number. so people can't track you down and kidnap you or other horrible things.

In general its just like. don't share information someone could use to identify you online, because people are weird and some of them are shitty and if you say something and they don't like it, and if they can find you or identify you then thats not good!

[dragon-swords-prophecies]

i love it so much when i leave myself a chapter title and absolutely nothing else to hint at what i wanted to write there

yep

i love it when that happens. i love it sooooooo much

[icarusredwings]

I love how long your posts are

Thank fucking god I was waiting for someone to say this. Im so tired of tiny posts like NO that is not the full potential of this brilliant thought!! Share your full ENTIRE thought process on this subject, or you will sit up at night wondering what it could have been.

Algorithm is a hater and hates to see my long ass posts be bangers when in reality my long ass posts are the ones that are the most heart filled and thought out.

In this essay, I will-

[monachopsis-11]

Teacher: You should stop being so anxious!

Me: Oh my god you’re right! Why didn’t I think of that brilliant solution sooner? 😐

[mentallyill-daydreamer]

whumper waking up strapped to a chair bound by duck tape in a small, ominous, dimly lit room they've never seen before. Parallel to whumpee whom was holding an unsettlingly large knife.

"after all this time," a layer of sweat stuck to whumpees face and tears rolled down the sides of their tender bruised and beaten cheeks "I finally get my revenge, after all those months of torture and agony,"

Whumpee stepped closer to whumper, resting the cold sharp steel of the dagger against whumpers throat. "I get to make you feel the same terror I did every night, unable to sleep, or eat or drink. I get to make you plea for mercy as I did."

"you don't scare me." Whumper spat

"then why's your heart beating so fast?"

"cause you're kinda cute like this."

[wheelersblue]

That's a nice, heterosexual way to sit 😇

[jewishtwig]

You can’t just decide you’re Jewish. You are either born Jewish or you aren’t. Judaism is an ethnoreligion and it is not possible to convert to an ethnicity.

Wow! To think, Halakha is being rewritten in my inbox! What an honor you’ve bestowed upon me!

We should alert everyone immediately! This is going to cause significant upset! Think of all the Talmuds that will need to be edited and reprinted!

Great sage, please come off anon so we can all learn from your wealth of knowledge! I can only assume this view must be divinely inspired for you at assert it so boldly against the standing Halakha! I cannot wait to learn more!

I am so curious, wise one, what do we do now that we know Ruth is not Jewish? That would of course mean her decedents (so, all of Beit David) are not Jewish. This is going to cause quite the stir!

[sulasnsleep]

“Sarcasm helps me overcome the harshness of the reality we live, eases the pain of scars and makes people smile.”

— Mahmoud Darwish

[elibean]

The best part about being an adult is being completely and utterly emotionally and physically exhausted, having nothing left in the tank, and then being expected to go to work the next day

[humor-experiment-lab]

Um. I see

[river-taxbird]

"Am I the only one who imagines elaborate fake scenarios with my OCs when I'm listening to music?"

Yes. It's very abnormal. It's concerning that you even brought it up publicly and you should consider talking to someone.

[liliumsims]

[hearts4pearlescentmoon]

can’t tell if my stomach hurts because of my period or because of the three slices of cheesecake I ate to deal with the period pain

[jurassicsickfics]

A sarcastic, smart mouthed character's responses to being asked, "Are you crying?"

1: "No, I'm singing. Pretty ain't it?"

2: "Of course not. If I was crying you'd see tears. Oh wait."

3: "No, I'm cleaning out my eyes."

4: *just stares at them, tears running down their face* "Take a wild guess."

5: "Well, either that or eyes can sweat now. Sure hope I'm crying. "

[eyes-inthe-skies]

Rodney is so Bitchy im really really obsessed

[star-ryx]

Can we just sit and like admire this? Such brotherly love. They just love each other so much 👍